#yes I'm watching crushed
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When Shea Fontana wrote the new generation of Monster High, I don't think she intended for a 19 year old to rely on it while she's having a mental breakdown, but that's precisely what I'm doing 💀
#therapy?#nah#a good frankie centered monster high episode?#hell yeah#now we're talking#god I love this show#I'm gonna wake up tomorrow after posting this and be like#izzy what were you doing#a coping mechanism is a coping mechanism my friend#why release your inner geyser alone when you can do it for cleo?#yes I'm watching crushed#felt it was appropriate lol#I wrote too#just some poetry#but it helped a little#I'll probably just sleep it off and see how I feel tomorrow#feeling pretty eepy anyway#<3
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The Adventure Begins
Levi's overacting. Again. The only reason it wasn't obvious during the school play was because Simeon kept him reined in. Levi gets excited quite easily, and it causes him to get lost in whatever role he's playing.
I'll have to ask Simeon, but I don't think he intended the Lord of Shadow to act so...dramatically? badly? I don't know how to describe it, really. It just isn't very good.
Unlike MC. I'm not sure why I like their acting better, especially since they're currently matching Levi's energy. Maybe it's because they're intentionally hamming it up. They did mumble an apology to me before they started talking to him, after all, so they must know that Levi's acting isn't the best.
Satan's isn't much better, either. He's not as over-the-top as Levi, but I don't find him convincing as the "villain" of this story. If anything, he'd make a good anti-hero, but Solomon probably didn't want to make things too complicated.
Solomon's not a very good author.
However, I'm choosing to keep all this to myself, because the point of all this is to help MC get their first star. Lucifer, on the other hand, is having a hard time suspending his disbelief. So, I understand why MC told him to shut up. I just hope they're prepared to get their ass handed to them once Lucifer's back to normal size, because while he has a soft spot for MC, he doesn't like being silenced. Messes with his pride.
Speaking of which...the stars.
They represent the seven virtues, which are direct opposites of our sins. For me, that virtue is temperance. Solomon probably knows this, but he may not realize the full extent of my relationship with temperance.
Once upon a time, I was able to control myself and my urges. Until I wasn't. For my brothers, their sin was triggered by specific events; that wasn't the case for me. It just...happened. And I didn't realize it until it was too late.
Now, it's what most people know me for. They think I'm a meathead that only thinks about food. Even my brothers.
Which isn't fair.
Why are they allowed to have complex personalities, but not me? Why can they participate in mentally stimulating activities, while I'm cast off to the side and dismissed as too dumb to understand any of it? It's never made sense to me.
I think that's part of why I like MC so much. They're the first person in a really, really long time that sees me beyond my sin. They actually listen to what I have to say and seem to value my opinion, even if it's not related to food or sports.
Yet somehow, deep inside, I don't fully trust them. I think it's coming from my subconscious. Somewhere in there lives a hurt angel that feels like everyone he cares about will die and leave him behind. And in a way, it's true.
Lilith may have been the only person in our little family that actually lost their life, but my brothers barely resemble what they were in the Celestial Realm. It's weird. They wear the same faces, but they're completely different people. Sometimes, I feel like they're complete strangers, or perhaps taken over by aliens.
Oddly, the one person I can rely on to stay the same is Satan. Then again, he didn't have his own form until we arrived in the Devildom, so this version of him is all I've ever known.
"Beel?"
Shit.
I missed a lot, didn't I?
"Are you okay? You seem out of it."
"I could say the same to you." Why is that the first thing that comes out of my mouth? I sound like a jerk.
MC merely sighs as they sit next to me on the...bed? I take a proper look at my surroundings and realize that we're in a hotel room of some kind. Lucifer appears to be sleeping on the nightstand, using tissues as both pillow and blanket.
"Wanna go first, or shall I?" Interesting question. They don't seem upset at me.
"Your call." MC rests their head on my shoulder.
"Simeon needs my help making an important decision." Their tone indicates something serious.
"With what?" MC sighs again.
"His future." Huh? Why would an angel need a human's help with that? I know that the two of them are fairly close, but still.
"But that's neither here nor there," they quickly add, sighing. "It's not like I can do anything about it now." They glance up at me. "What's on your mind?"
"My past."
"As an angel?" I nod.
"Back then, the only thing that mattered to people was that I was strong. I wanted to be useful, so I decided to become a soldier and fight for the Celestial Realm. Problem was, I had trouble controlling my powers."
"Like I did before receiving the Ring?"
"You know, I hadn't really thought about it until you said it, but yeah. I suppose we have that in common. In your case, everyone had your back, which is good, because I wouldn't have wanted you to go through that experience the way I did." MC sits up and properly looks at me.
"What do you mean?"
"Every time I would destroy something--even though most of the time it was a complete accident--Raphael would make some sort of sarcastic remark about it. I think he started calling me the Hulk at one point, but it was meant as an insult." I pause.
"At least he had the decency to do it to my face. Lots of angels would talk shit about me behind my back. They thought I was too stupid to pick up on it, but I knew. They acted overly sweet towards me whenever I would walk in the room. Condescending, even. It was like I was a dumb kid to them." MC places a hand on my thigh and pats it.
"Sounds depressing," they remark.
"It was. Oddly enough, the one person in authority that didn't treat me that way was Lucifer. I initially thought he was too busy with his duties to really care about much else, but then one day he approached me and started talking to me. We had a legitimate conversation."
"About?"
"He told me to keep in mind that being a Celestial Realm soldier wasn't about attacking--"
"--but protecting." We must have woken Lucifer up. "You had the power to protect everyone--to keep them safe--and that you shouldn't feel bad because you were special. If you learned to control your powers, I'd recommend you to the cherubim and have you serve as a Celestial Realm gatekeeper. You did, and so I kept my promise." Lucifer beckons MC to pick him up and bring him closer to me.
"MC and I may be connected by the Ring of Light, but the two of you have a strong connection as well," he continues. "You're both motivated by the need to protect the ones you love, even if it means sacrificing yourself in the process. Drawing on that similarity is going to be the key to pass Solomon's test."
"Are you saying Solomon knew we had that in common?" MC asks incredulously.
"No. I did. I simply passed the knowledge along to him."
"How long--"
"The rooftop."
"Of Dogi Magi?" I'm glad MC understands what he's referring to, because I'm completely lost. Must have been something I wasn't involved with.
"You knew that Belphie would hurt you if you went against his order to reject me, but you did it anyway."
"I didn't want to lie to you."
"Because that would have meant hurting his feelings." Asmo may have used his powers to pick up on Lucifer's crush on MC early on, but I knew pretty much from the moment they set eyes on each other. Granted, he was more attracted to their soul initially, but who could blame him? It was bright and shiny, even back then. If we weren't under orders to not eat them, then they wouldn't have made it out of the assembly hall alive. Even Diavolo was struggling to contain himself.
Anyway, the point is MC cared enough about Lucifer in that moment to feel the need to protect him.
Just like I felt the need to protect Lucifer after I became a cherub.
MC's going to get their star.
#obey me shall we date#obey me mc#obey me beel#obey me beelzebub#obey me lucifer#basically what i'm doing with beel is depicting him as someone constantly in his head#and not in the 'i wonder what i'll eat next' kind of way#but instead having him silently observe what's happening around him and mentally commentate on it#sometimes it involves going on little rambles as certain things remind him of other things#but i'm trying to showcase someone who's able to pick up on people's personalities and feeling#simply by watching them interact with the world around them#i think he's emotionally intelligent#that doesn't always transfer to academia#but it is an important type of intelligence#because it helps guide interactions with real people in real situations#also#headcanon that lucifer was the last one to realize/accept that he had a crush on mc#asmo and beel may have picked up on it first#but eventually the others caught on#even the other exchange students#and diavolo#cue relentless teasing from diavolo to lucifer#diavolo: you have feelings for mc#lucifer: no i don't#diavolo: yes you do#and they'd go back and forth about it#diavolo just wanted his friend/occasional lover to be happy#and he thought mc was good for lucifer#so he rooted for them to get together#and was happy when they did
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#since i found out how to edit images i'm never gonna stop#rewatching strangers from hell after watching evilive and psychopath diary is too funny#the murderous seo group#they're so similar it's incredible to see#all their dating profiles like 'tall murderer successful at his job searching for average guy that may be morally grey'#what's that joke again#the diary of the evil bad from hell ?#i love them bc they're supposed to be all scary and creepy but they have like#1 braincell combined#ah yes i'm an evil villain who's gonna get killed by the one dude i'm obsessed with#when you want to morally corrupt a guy and it turns against you#psychopath diary#strangers from hell#evilive#seo inwoo#seo do young#seo moonjo#guys that spend 1/2 of the show covered in blood and 1/2 writing their crush's name in their diary with hearts
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ok but like....
Hear me out
#tim downie#upstart crow#kit marlowe#i am shamefully attracted to this man#i'm gonna watch the whole show JUST FOR HIM#I didn't even know about this show before and i grew up watching Blackadder#i am having a major crisis where i am forced to admit i would fck this man#what has the video game done to me#he gives me the same tingly feeling i got when i was a kid and watched Red Dwarf and Rimmer showed up#yes i was a weird kid#i was a 10 yo girl with a crush on Arnold J Rimmer#it explains a lot about me actually
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the new puss in boots fuckin slays
I love them so much
I never felt the urge to put flower crowns on characters I love but this movie does unexpected things
#Puss in Boots#puss in boots fanart#puss in boots the last wish#why is the movie so good#I love it so much#I didnt expect to love it this much#I watched it in theaters 3 times already#I wanna get the plushies but theyre 30 bucks each#I'm not made of money#someone commission me so I can get puss in boots plushies#why is there no death plush#puss in boots death#is my new crush#yes I'm a furry
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To whoever finds this, I have closed the city gates.
There is an infection in these streets.
An evil that has lay in wait for naive fool to lift it from it's prison and spread it across the world.
I've put all of you in danger, and I'm sorry.
I was blind to the wonder of it all, I let it use me like everything else has.
Always a puppet to some greater mind- some *thing*.
But not anymore.
This evil is alive. I've seen what lies beyond the gate, I know what it's plans are.
What they always have been.
And I cannot stand idly by as it takes over the world I so /desperately/ love.
I hope that whatever memories the world has of me are pleasant ones.
Before I was more monster than man.
Please know that I have only tried my best. I'm sorry that it wasn't enough, and that I didn't see this coming.
I'm sorry.
#whoops sorry guys i watched owen's final new life ep and sparrow's final journal entry really got me#and yes i did decide to write the whole thing on a tumblr post cause I'm crazy#i will also be making art of this moment soon cause it crushed me im so amazed of how owen did this series!!!!#new life sparrow#newlife smp#new life owen#IM CRAZY IM CRAZY IM CRAZY
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{ modern day | 2010s - 2020s }
> they're on a date 🥰🧋❤
[ okay to reblog ]
#not me finally drawing fanart of me and luck for the first time after 5 years of crushing on him lolol#this started as a doodle of what i think he would look like in the modern day#ya know. being an immortal and all.#and then i just kept adding to it until it became a full piece OTL#yes my baccano insert has red hair in the 2000s!#she eventually starts dyeing it and loves how it looks so she keeps doing it#also if you see the ring on my insert's finger—#i figure they'd probably be married by this point in time lolol#after all it's been like... [checks watch] 80-90 years.#anyways. i'm really happy with this one#i think it turned out cute <3#🌸 my art#🌸 self insert | baccano!#♣️
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Appreciation post for 'girly girl' characters and/or shows that celebrate traditionally feminine things that girls and women are shamed for.
Characters on this list that love makeup, fashion, hair, etc. Characters that are still written as strong, intelligent, brave, etc. That told young girls that these interests are valid, they are not lesser interests. Being feminine and liking traditionally feminine things does not make them weak.
#I'm so glad I got to grow up with these girls#I was originally gonna make a post of Barbie Daphne and Stella and be like. They remind me so much of each other#And how much I love characters like them#Because I do#But then I was like fuck it let's just make a post for all the girly girls because they're so good#So here we are. In a world of misogyny. We still have them. And I am so greatful#I'm sad I missed out on celebrating my femininity and stuff like this in my teen years because of just. Stuff I was going through#But I'm glad I'm doing it now. I've been getting into makeup for the past year. Mostly eye it's so fun#The Barbie movie. Dressing up for it. Being proud makeup and skirts and dressing up like I did as a girl. God it was so wonderful#I've not felt this connected to this part of myself in years. It has helped to much#It reminded me of my love for Barbie. The movies. The fairies and mairmaids. The bright colours and fashions#And my love for all of these shows. The outfits and designs I fell in love with. The friendships and sisterhoods in all of them.#Yes it's just Rarity. I know some of the others girls also fit. But some don't as much so I didn't wanna just put a group one#And I know Kim and some others aren't as girly as others. But she's still a good example.#Her and Monique's shopping trip and other stuff is engraved into my mind. I actually think about them a lot I love them#Daphne was also a masisve awakening for me. I had such a crush on her. And the Hex Girls.#If you're wondering why other shows aren't on here. Like Trollz or Powerpuff Girls or something. It's msotly based on what I watched#And I didn't really watch them I'm sorry but feel free to add more.#We're ignoring how I mispelled mermaids. I'm not going back to change that tag.#Anyway I love women basically. We're awesome.#Barbie#Scooby Doo#Bratz#Monster High#Kim Possible#My Little Pony#Winx#Mew Mew Power
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Don't talk to me, I'm thinking about Clark Kent and the inherent tragedy of a weapon who only wants to heal
#an alien god whose greatest wish is to be human#is he over powered? yes. and yet he always falls short#he can only use so much of his powers to be able to heal#and to save#and not to truly harm those he fights#and those who watch#and yet#he believes his powers were created for good#were created to heal#to protect#don't you see how you crush the things you love? set fire to all that you see?#everyone else sees it#Bruce. Luthor. even Diana#''why are you superman?'' ''because no one else can be''#but that's not exactly true. is it?#because he's not superman#if superman is some ideal benevolent god who can solve the world's problems... than he is not superman no matter how hard he tries to be#if superman is some all powerful destructive ruling god... then he is not superman and does everything not to be#if superman is the latter then he could be super man#but he's not#so why is he superman?#because no one else has the ability to try. and no one else has the ability to refuse#okay up tearing up again I'm gonna go to slee#dc comics#superman#clark kent#my rambles
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I wish all Precure seasons that attempt to force a reciprocated romance between young teen magical girls and animal-fairy mascots that turn into Ambiguously Adult Hot Guys™ a very Stop That Immediately Dear Gourd Why. 🫠
#this is about yes precure 5 because thats what i'm watching right now#but i'm aware of at least One other series that does the ikemen fairy thing (Hugtto) and I desperately hope they don't do that there#& I get that teen girls can & will develop crushes on an older teacher-figure. two in one season is a bit much (nozomi AND komachi) but FINE#← grudgingly#but to have both Coco and Natsu (i Refuse to call him Nuts it is Too Dumb) act like they reciprocate those feelings / play into them...#blegh. not a fan#Coco holds Nozomi to his chest a few times & this episode at the resort he refers to her as ''princess'' and i KNOW it's the writers#and the fact it's an older show too. but i'm SOOO tired of it#and Komachi... Komachi my sweet girl why do they do this to you. why do they make Natsu say ''i feel calm around you''#why why why why why. augh. so tired#i read the episode summaries for a few eps ahead of where i currently am (ep 26) and oughaohghh it's gonna keep happening :/#🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠 blargh#anyway#yes precure 5#precure... salt? crit? neg? are there rant tags in this community idk i'm sorry#not that this is like. a particularly controversial opinion i think. i hope.#hard to catch up-recure (saa minna de)#eMerambles#eMerambles in the tags
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god I love the first shot of Shinichi they use in the opening of Sparkle. It's genuinely so soft and tender it's enough to make you fall in love. From the distance shot of him satisfied to close up where he loses the smugness it's just so well done. You can tell that's how Ran sees him and I just really love it.
#Detective Conan#Kudou Shinichi#Mouri Ran#dcmk#i'm not usually one to lose my mind bout him for many reasons but its enough to make me feel soft#and like more than anything this might be the most convoncing bit of ShinRan for me?#like yes they like each other and they're conscious of each other and have crushes cause of that is what i usually feel#but you can feel how she feels bout him in that one shot#It's just fucking well done I wanna give who ever animated it a raise#more things should be carried out like this to convey emotion in anime#anyways carry on#i just lose my mind each time I watch that bit#the music at that moment prolly also helps
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I need I NEED CSI Miami content
lol yeah that's what I do
start to love shows that ended like 20 years ago
anyway IF YOU POST ABOUT CSI MIAMI, please let me know
I also NEED FANFICS about it, but that's too much to ask for haha
#csi miami#i used to watch it a lot like 9 years ago tho#i even made a post about a ncis criminal minds csi miami crossover or something#but hey now here i am having a crush on#horatio caine#and i'm like ?????? but i think i had that crush 9 years ago too yes daddy issues i guess#i feel better because apparently people do find horatio hot 😳#i like#ryan wolfe#too
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I cannot describe to you what it's like to wake up, open youtube, almost immediately get hit by an ex jumpscare (as in, my ex in a thumbnail of a recommended video) and not even a minute later get slapped with a former tumblr crush jumpscare
#estonia is too small#the world is too small#mod milan#don't get me wrong it's good to see them alive and well#but not how I imagined starting my day#also in the second video both my ex and my crush are there at once#I'm so not excited about that#and yes i watched both videos but i can't tell you why without doxing them
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. . . finished all four volumes of heartstopper and got caught up to the current issue via webtoon . . . okay, i get it now. i get it
#caroline talks#i've been in a really weird haze of studying as of late because school is being very intense right now#so not being very active rn!#but. very important life announcement is CAUGHT UP TO HEARTSTOPPER . . .#i did watch like half of season 1 on netflix but i couldn't get into the show first for some reason?#but now that i've read the entire webtoon/webcomics i think i'm going to go back to the show#but yeah no the comics are so. when i tell you i felt something twisting in my chest because of the fourth volume. MAN.#also yes did i speed-read all of heartstopper bc my heart was crushed after babel? yeah.#(because another update: i did finish reading babel today. i have been very upset about it.)#(like wow. i am never going to be able to read another book after babel huh.)
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I'm so exhausted I don't really know where or how to begin my one-day weekend, have spent the day just kind of collapsed into executive dysfunctional confusion when what I WANT to do is post on tumblr about gay tv
#i wanna talk about 23.5 because the latest ep made me feral but for like side couples#i LOVE the main couples but nidabambam and mawinton make me insane#i was rooting for aro ton but now i want mawinton so badly#there's something that happens with the ships that aren't the advertised pairs so whether they happen or not isn't prescribed#i know mawintinh is what everyone on tumblr wants and it's not like i would be unhappy with that ok#but mawinton both obsessed with other people and relationships and oblivious to how they already have a boyf -#thats my shit.#tinh just seems so uninterested in mawin rn too whereas ton is laser focused#and to put a character like charoen into a yuri like come on how many of us who DIDN'T 'just know' we were not into boys#picked a dude to crush on from afar and then went EUGH STOP WHY IS THIS HAPPENING if/when he actually spoke to us#that is way too familiar a narrative to put in a GL and then resolve with her getting with a guy i'm sorry#but her and ton becoming besties who love shipping OTHER people together. hell yes lmfao#that's what i'm talking about! two people who think they like each other but actually just enjoy doing fandom together <3#buddhism fandom and friend fiction fandom#anyway i can't believe i spent that many words on them but i'm truly invested now. FLOWERS AND KNEE TOUCHES FOR MAWINTON#and i don't even know where to begin with nidabambam??????????????????#i thought this would be us projecting headcanon onto some women who had some nice scenes together#i didn't dare hope for ?????? lucky/unlucky protective/clumsy glorious t4t grown woman love story#what the heck i felt like my brain was unravelling as i watched them#they really stumbled(/carefully protected the other from stumbling) their way into a STARGAZE DATE#what the heck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#i think something magical just happens when you hit a certain point in a story and you've LET the main couples grow and evolve#so they're more or less together and it's hilarious and adorable (oh my god ongsa and aylin taking initiative oh my god)#but they also leave narrative space for MORE LOVE STORIES IN THE BEAUTIFUL ENSEMBLE#and that's where i start to lose control apparently#23.5#23point5#dear diary
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"The Girls on the Bus" might be my new favorite streaming serial. completely unrelated but I have a crush on Carla Gugino
#I am so normal about her and also the entire cast and the show in general#I love everyone so much#imagine: an hbo/max show that doesn't crush my will to live every week (yes I am looking at you GoT you were UNFORGIVEABLE)#also I have a soft spot for journalists#which all the characters in this show are (yes even lola)#they're following different candidates on the political trail and being clever and funny and topical#I'm filling the void between episodes with the West Wing so all in all learning a lot about the broken American political system#I'm basically watching schoolhouse rock for people who hate musicals#girls on the bus#tgotb#grace gordon greene
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