Supercorptober 2022 Day 6: Leaves

Nothing is out of the ordinary the day Lena leaves for a 12-day business trip across the country (leaving is never a problem; it’s the coming back that always worries her).

(Her worries are always, and with some measure of relief, unfounded.)

It’s a week after she’s returned and Kara leaves her pocket calendar squarely on Lena's desk that Lena starts to suspect that there may be something behind the spate of forgetfulness that seems to have overcome Kara lately (that and the odd smile that had fluttered across Kara’s face as she’d left, a mix of nerves and excitement that was gone before Lena could ask about it).

She lays the -yet unclaimed- items out one by one (feels somewhat like a kid again looking at a collection of memories shared in secret): a credit card, pen, water bottle, pocket calendar.

It’s not until she turns over Kara’s credit card that she notices the small words penned into the side - she recognizes the handwriting first, feels the smile on her lips even before the thought fully forms in her mind, then the words second. Knowing now what to look for, she finds the narrative continued across all the items - not forgotten after all.

Air leaves her lungs in a rush, a heady feeling taking over as realization sinks in and confirmation blankets over it (somewhere in the back of her mind, she thinks she hears someone say, you won’t be left alone again; it’s to herself, and her and both of them to each other).

Lena doesn’t mention it when they meet up for lunch the next day – she does, however, leave behind some things of her own: a kiss, a promise, her heart (though the last she’d already given a long, long time ago).

[Supercorptober 2022 prompts]

an artist i follow got an ask about whether it was alright to use their art as covers for fanfic bookbinding and i'm. sorry i must have missed this discourse but since when are people outright printing out other people's work and binding them into books? do you contact and get author's permission (sure as fuck hope so)? and how do we writers feel about that, because i certainly feel very uncomfortable with that idea. i mean not to spoil the artistic expression of bookbinding because it's beautiful work that i most certainly could not do, but. you can access them stories any time you want on the websites where they were originally posted. why print them? again i mean i get the pleasure of holding & reading physical books, i much prefer that too, but like. get some books i guess? sorry i come from a place of honesty and tbh surprise and confusion about this whole thing. someone tell me how we're feeling about this. someone explain to me why it's being done. i just wanna understand

“It could be that the loss of her children drove the Queen deeper into her darker desires...but, I don’t believe she was fighting against them that hard before that particular tragedy. No monster does.” (Patreon)

Bonus:

Hmm, wonder what he could cover those holes with :3c

hate that I have to clarify whenever I think of two characters as having a powerful and purely platonic bond as "just friends". like I have to say that but they are not "just" anything.

did you hear me. I said they are friends. not brothers or siblings or maternal or paternal or any other familially-defined relationship. they are friends!!! do you know how powerful that is??? they! are! friends!!! they are FRIENDS

Reading Barrayar I felt trapped in Cordelia’s head. It’s incredibly effective for the dread of war as a civilian. Plans and machinations happening beyond you, with no input. Hearing of things happening that seem far off and like yeah that’s awful but then suddenly it dominoes in a way that destroy your life and it’s not your fault and you could've done nothing at all to prevent it. Especially the tension of being hunted in the Dendarii mountains with no idea how the war is going, if they’ve already lost, if it is already too late. Cordelia is doing actively important things in service of the war by sheltering Gregor, yet there's this pervasive feeling of helpless lack of control. She spends most of the book with this dread of not knowing when the next threat to their family will come, and I don’t think it could’ve been done so effectively if we had access to the information Aral had. I found it frustrating at times, since it felt like Cordelia was swept up in events with little agency (at first; obviously our dear captain didn’t remain there). I wanted so badly to be with Aral seeing and knowing and making the decisions.

But that’s the point! Most people have absolutely zero agency in those situations and little information and it’s terrifying. Barrayar captures the feeling of being a civilian in war where so many narratives narrow in upon the heroes and 'men of history' that control conflicts. That's what readers expect. I think that’s why I loved the ending so much. After so long trapped with Cordelia, just trying to survive the larger machinations of Barrayar’s bloody politics, it felt so, so good to finally be on the offensive, to have information the opponents don’t, to finally have power and the means to control what happens. It's a relief to the constant tension of having no agency in a giant conflict that frankly Cordelia had no business being affect by, yet was swept up in because of her love of Aral.

Which is the second thing I deeply enjoyed in Barrayar. I love how the war is made so human. A messy tangle of human relationships control it. I can’t stop thinking about the hostages. There are just so many children being used because the war holds the future hostage. Tiny precious Miles utterly incapable of comprehending how large a pawn he is. Young grieving Gregor vital to the plans of both sides whether dead or alive. Elena, who should be of no importance but she is because that's the kid of an unimportant soldier, just like every other hostage is another piece in the web of the war. I keep thinking about the relatives of Aral’s men caught in the capital. The hostages that Aral refuses to take. Everyone just trying to take care of those they love, and the points where they must put other priorities over their relationships are heart wrenching.

Barrayar looks dead on at how little people try to survive a civil war. From the mountains where the fighting seems so far, and information is slowed to a trickle of the singular mailman. The invasion of forces that disrupts people who may not even know there’s a war yet. The scientists and the genius lost in a single blast that goes unnoticed. The urban populations trying to sneak in food and people and keep their heads down. Random citizens debating who to sell out, weighing risks and bounties, if it will get them the favor with the occupiers that will help them survive. All so small in the grand scheme of things, and yet they are who Barrayar concerns itself with.

Cordelia’s uncertainty and fear would’ve been undermined if we were allowed to see in the heads of people driving the conflict, because Barrayar isn’t about those people. It is the desperation of two mothers, powerless and kept in the dark, that topples the regime.

Addendum: Cordelia’s relationship to Aral firmly places her in an upper class position that is important to note when discussing the role of civilians/‘little people’ within this analysis. But as a woman on Barrayar she is extremely limited in the power she is allocated, especially compared to someone like Aral, which would be the military leadership POV that novels more focused on the grander scope of war would utilize. Again not to say Cordelia has no agency or power, but it is not to the degree of the people in charge. Thus I place her alongside the average people swept up in a war outside their control. Still, her position as a Vor Lady gives her some access knowledge and connections that she turns into power, which while limited are far more than the average citizen. Her significance to Vordarrian is exclusively viewed as yet another hostage, an underestimation that Cordelia readily exploits, but still afforded only due to her status. Cordelia occupies a position of importance but not power beyond the scope of the people she’s formed direct relationships with, which only further ties into the essay's thesis.

We got an interview from the artists of the second opening recently on the official PR account for the anime (translation by Dephender can be found on this link!), and I found this bit really interesting:

Q2: Which parts of the lyrics are especially meaningful? yama: One of the first parts of the lyrics I wrote has a bit that talks about "the truth of the world". I think everyone has something they pursue, and the Pokémon anime likewise has both kids that have a goal or a dream they embrace, as well as kids that haven't found a dream yet. That's why I wanted to include words like "found" or that talk about pursuing something together.

The italicized bits in the quote above being the part in the video interview during which Amethio is shown! Friede is pictured in the first part of the sentence, and then Amethio is immediately shown when yama-san is talking about how "there are kids that haven't found a dream yet."

So yeah, it was already quite clear before but Amethio doesn't have a dream and what he's been doing from the beginning isn't something he is doing for himself. While his current "objective" is similar to Roy's dream (they both want to reach Rayquaza as of now), the stark difference here is that Roy's dream is his own, it's something he wants for himself, while Amethio is acting for someone else's sake and isn't chasing his own wish.

I also like the juxtaposition of Friede and Amethio shown one after another, too. I feel like this says so much about their rivalry, they stand more or less as equals on the battlefield (which raises its own set of questions but that's for another day) but their dynamics highlights Amethio's emotional immaturity in some ways. Friede is older and has something he pursues and a goal for himself, and Amethio is younger and doesn't have something like that. Friede went through a time he felt stuck and aimless but he managed to turn his life around, so I wonder if that's something Amethio will learn too (through Friede or other circumstances).

Anyway, given how it's stated that some characters don't have a dream yet, I wonder if they will depict Amethio eventually finding one. The series is about "finding" something important through adventure, after all.

if i wanna be genuine and really fully not care what ppl think of me then i have Got to just let myself say fag on here already. like sorry but not only have me and my bf been affectionately calling each other faggot for years now but it's also genuinely the most concise, and for me personally, even the most comfortable way to describe my identity. i'm an effeminate bisexual gnc man but also kinda something else entirely. i'm not a woman but my attraction to women is gay and so is my attraction to men and anyone else. "fag" is the easiest way to sum that all up. also since i feel that tagging it kind of defeats the purpose of reclaiming it, if any friends or mutuals are really uncomfortable with it then it'd be best if you just blacklisted any and all variations of the word if you haven't already, because i genuinely don't wanna upset you. anyone else who still has a problem with it, i suggest that you just unfollow

fr is he, you know.............................................repeatedly described as being Impersonable and Lacking Charm and Pedantic and confused / bothered by things he supposedly shouldn't be while inspiring confusion / botherment in others in ways he supposedly shouldn't and like 99.9% of the grief he's given is over All That while he's just sitting or standing there rather than the like intimidatingly efficient hitman georg thing he has going on. which is in fact The Skill That Makes Him Useful Despite It All and also perhaps the least foothold in interactions because [worried he can & may kill you] affords power when otherwise just being the weird guy nobody likes(tm)

bonus mordecai balling

I'm curious... Granny April will always be Granny April, but how do the turtle tots see Casey Marie? Since you said they know most of their family history, does this mean they know Casey wanted to train them for war? How do they feel about this? Are some of them still a little resentful or are they already at peace with what happened and are ready to have a relationship with her?

The tots actually know April has a daughter! Even if Mikey makes a sour face whenever she does, April talks about her kid to the babies and tells them that they have a cousin. Even if the kids are aware of her existence growing up they don't really question why they've never met Casey because they know that New York is still somewhat of a war zone and that their cousin is basically the leader of the rebellion so she's definitely busy (she's somewhat of a very stranged family member since the start lol). The kids never truly talk to Casey until they are adults though. Mikey felt very strongly about them being old enough to decide if wanting to meet her after knowing she created them for war and all.

Since Michelangelo was actually able to save the babies from a child soldier life, the kids are rather forgiving of what Casey did because in the end that didn't happen and by this time Casey actually is remorseful of her way of thinking when creating them and just wants to get to know them as a family member. It takes a bit of time though (the kids, even if willing to forgive her and move on, are still very much on high alert around her (cough Uno and Moja cough). After all, they know of Mikey's life story and feel a sort of kinship of anger directed towards her (It fades away in the end though).

Definitely not resentful but still not the most buddy buddies straight from the start.

to be honest i dont like it much when people want to make maya hate being master of kurain like . i dont know. dont you think that kind of sucks as an ending for her

From Chapter One of On Mistakes and Birthdaycake by @bemmiecake on AO3

I started reading this fic when it first came out and it’s had such a huge impact on how I think of knuckles and you have definitely seen it’s influence in my art this past year! So it only seemed fair to try do something for the fic itself x

anyway: last thing about the fox.

I think the order in which the team reacts to frank fielding* hurting himself is pretty interesting.

Gideon and Morgan are first, simply because they're the ones closest.

Hotch and Elle are next, with Elle a little behind...

But when it comes to actually restraining Frank, Elle, who is still new and less experienced, lingers behind. If you watch the scene carefully, she actually backs away, too.

And finally, Reid stands at the very back. He enters the room but doesn't go any further, and the camera pans down to show him rocking back and forth on his feet, like he can't decide if he wants to run into or out of the room. I think it's possible that Diana self-harmed at some point in the past (although granted, the self-harm in this scene is a different "type") and he may have been having some unpleasant memories.

*the brother of one of the victims, who goes to her house despite her husband not wanting him there, is seen by her through the window, and thinks she mouths "go away" at him when she actually mouths "help me"

wait hol' up i gotta hear those Bobo Thoughts. hes such a fascinating character and the way he was used was so all over the place (like straight up vanishing when it was Serious Episode Time lmao) but,, thats Rex's friend! weird uncle? Moral compass but pointing the wrong way?? Always had such mixed feelings about his writing

Bobo is like. The thing about Bobo is he's such a good fucking character potential. I said most of my thoughts in this reply so I don't really have much more to say besides Wow they really did just make the potential for a really interesting character and blew it for jokes about harassing women. There was so much THERE where he COULD be funny while still being a serious character - plenty of the time Rex is silly and goofy while still being a serious character.

Exposed imo is one of, if not the best Bobo episode for the simple fact that he was actually a funny comedy relief character while still being Bobo, actually. It didn't really dive into him as a character, but he did have some pretty good lines ("That cage was electromagnetically sealed" "I didn't say it was easy" got a chuckle out of me, as well as "Are you going to just stand there and talk or help me?" "Talk.")

But also in my rewrite of Bobo, he's...well, he trusts in Rex's abilities, and he knows at the end of the day he doesn't really have superpowers or healing like the kid, but he's way more concerned for him. He notices how Rex makes jokes when he's stressed and makes jokes with him, to help ease tensions and get Rex to crack a smile when things are tough. He sits with the kid and talks because he knows he's also an adult, but he knows he's easier for Rex to relate to than other soldiers at base. Even with as much as Holiday and Six love Rex and are there for them, they're still in positions of authority over him - Bobo, meanwhile, is another EVO, who knows he can talk to Rex about how much it sucks not to have people like them. I don't have the link on hand but I remember in @bambeptin's interview where the show creators mentioned how Bobo was like a weird uncle, and I think they should've played into that dynamic more. Bobo encouraging Rex to be reckless and sneak out and see what he can get away with when his parents and Providence aren't looking.

Also, the show just kind of...forgets that Bobo made Robobobo and I think that'd be fun to play with. Bobo surprising everyone with how smart he is, all the skills he picked up over his time doing crime on the streets that Rex doesn't remember/know about. He could've contributed to the team so much in S3 by being the guy who knows how to break into places without hurting or killing people (like Six and WK know), occasionally peeking at Holiday's work and pointing something out bc she's an overthinker (all the adults in the Providence Fam in S3 kind of are in their own ways) and he goes at things to try to find the easiest solution. Hell, even have jokes about him being surprisingly smart - have characters talk about something super complex and Bobo surprises everyone by understanding it. Have everyone getting ready to kick down a door and have Bobo say "And here I thought I was the animal" or some joke like that and pick the lock. Hell, have him try to open a door and see that it's unlocked while everyone's prepping to kick it in.

Have Bobo be just...a smart and logical guy and have that be the joke. He looks ridiculous, constantly makes jokes and acts dumb, but reminders that he IS smart can be funny, and him being cheeky can be funny! Hell, the show kind of hinted at potential but never went through but Bobo and Six having a rivalry bc they both think the other is bad for Rex at first (and have a history of clashing that we see in Promises Promises) could be VERY funny! Especially because it would pair Six's very blunt personality with Bobo's ridiculousness and refusal to act seriously. There's potential there but they just...went for easy jokes and it's a shame, because Bobo had so much potential to be great.

I’m a writer cause I’m a manipulator, that is all.

still writing my fic, and it’s going well. i want you to know that it is Dead Boy Detectives AU (or was at least inspired by that story from the sandman) and this piece of artwork essentially sums it all up

Find someone slightly annoying but in really small harmless ways so I decide none of the behaviours are worth bringing up with them → realizing: hey, Im also annoying! solidarity! → realizing we have a lot in common and starting to bond → finding out other people find this person annoying and are vocal about it behind their back → finding out this person has ADHD like me that's (at least one reason) why we have all these traits in common → fear.