#why is igor uhh
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back at it again with the gothic lit class posting. had to watch kenneth branagh's frankenstein tonight and it was uhh. A ride! some of my notes
- to preface i have seen one kenneth branagh movie before and it was his hamlet which was, to say the least, a little over the top. after seeing this one it seems this may be a pattern in his work
- walton is there! and there's no igor! it does include most of the events in the actual book so A for effort! also no ernest though 😔
- the sets and costumes were great I don't actually know much about historical costuming but everything looked really nice and well made i appreciate that
- did not appreciate victor frankenstein's little main character moment monologue in his first class at ingolstadt. you are annoying and the second hand embarrassment from everyone in this delightfully accurate anatomical theatre is palpable
- whyyyyy did they have to crank up the sibling thing between victor and elizabeth while SIMULTANEOUSLY cranking up the romance. you're disgusting you're revolting i hate you give me $200000
- also made victor much more of an asshole to elizabeth. not fun!
- kinda liked the take on the reanimation process quite gross and much more complex than the usual stitch'n'zap. why the ass shot of the creature though
- the process was also rube goldbergian to the point of goofiness which was only exaggerated by the extended scene of victor trying to get the creature on his feet only to repeatedly slip and fall in spilled amniotic fluid it was fucking hysterical swear to god
- this ends with victor getting the creature tangled in his mad scientist bead curtain of random chains and hooks wherupon the creature gets bonked on the head and victor presumes him dead, writes an absolutely scathing final note in his journal, and promptly fucks off to pass out and be revived an unknown time later by clerval feeding him soup. hoorah
- creature has a bizarre action movie-esque montage of escaping a mob in ingolstadt via brute force followed by parkour and finally jumping onto a cart of dead bodies being taken out of the city because there's an outbreak of something or other. it's somehow very plot relevant but in like three different unrelated instances, one of which is this
- clerval gets a more dramatic proposal from victor about partnering in his medical practice than elizabeth does about their actual marriage
- creature beats up cottage family's landlord. king of direct action
- there's no drawn out trial for justine she gets killed by a mob which really undercuts the themes and emotional resonance of that part of the story imo
- maybe it was because they had to carve out like 20-30 full minutes for various frankenfam frolicking scenes
- *victor and elizabeth Wedding Night™ scene* *me tapping awkwardly on the window* uhh guys? the creature?? guys y- AUGH not going in there actually you can carry on
- genuinely don't remember but umm does the creature rip elizabeth's entire beating heart out in the book? i don't think he does that?? y'all??
- clerval got sidelined so hard they fucking forgot to kill him
- in conclusion: very over the top. sadly painfully heterosexual. worth a watch if you have some friends to exchange bewildered glances and exclamations with throughout
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I was feeling marichat in this chili’s tonight, and I happened to stumble across an old screenshot of @chatnoirinette‘s tumblr tags that I’d saved to my phone. This is for you, Maryssa.
For Science
It’s become an instinct. If Marinette happens to let slip a tear of joy, she will grab a vial and bottle it up faster than Mr Ramier can grab the next copy of Pigeon Weekly. (Never mind he writes and stars in it himself, accompanied by Paris’s snazziest of pigeons.)
But pigeons are not the issue here. The fact is that tears of joy have become precious commodities: the last slice of pizza left after a movie night, the shiny orichalcum needed to create the ultimate weapon, the most coveted holy grail of tears. There can be no wasting them. Power up macarons and cheeses still needed to be made, especially since Hawkmoth has decided to take his akumas to Level 60 Boss Mode.
So when Chat Noir starts dropping by Marinette’s room for friendly visits, it’s only natural that the two of them should grow closer. Only natural they should tell jokes and laugh with each other. Only natural that when he’s making wheezing donkey noises and a tear slips free from his eyes, she goes for the vial like a hunter about to get the number one prize—aka, belly flops onto the floor and holds the vial up to catch the tear.
Chat blinks.
Marinette blinks.
“Uhh,” he says, and leans back from the vial. “What are you doing?”
Her smile is as wide as a valley, and the only thing it contains is awkward. “I’m collecting tears … for, uh, science.”
“For science?”
“Yep.” A nervous laugh, a glance at a non-existent watch. “Wow, look at the time. Maybe we should—”
He leans forward, staring deep into her eyes. She gulps.
“Are you lying to me?” he asks.
Her heart quickens. “N-nope.”
He moves closer so their noses almost bump. His gaze is x-ray intense, searching to expose her for the lying fraud she is. Oh no. This is bad. It feels like if she blinks or so much as twitches, he’s gonna pounce with a A-ha, I know you’re Ladybug! cry. Then she’ll be ruined and probably labelled the worst guardian ever, and then she’ll have to give up being Ladybug, and then—
“You are,” he says, still close enough for her to feel his breath on her lips like the caress of gossamer wings.
Warmth spills over her cheeks. Her heart stutters worse than her attempts at speech around Adrien.
Forcing a laugh, she pushes him back with a hand to his nose. “I have no idea what you’re talking about. I’m just … curious about tears.”
“Right.” His eyebrow quirks. “For science.”
“Yes.”
The smile that tugs at one corner of his lips is far too smug. Might as well be the smile version of Chloe. Ha ha, Dupain-Cheng, it says. How does it feel to suck so much at lying? I can see right through you.
Her blush darkens and she scrambles into a proper sitting position, careful not to tip the vial. “Okay, time for a subject change.”
All his smug swagger vanishes. “Hey now, you can’t just do that.”
“Yeah I can. My room, my rules.”
“Well, it’s my tear, and I wanna know why you’re bottling it like Igor about to take it off to Master for the latest experiment.”
She hides the vial behind her back, but his eyes track her hands and linger as he sits there all twitching ears and swishing tail. So much for out of sight, out of mind.
“C’mon, Marinette,” he says, pulling out the pleading kitty eyes. “I promise I won’t laugh, and you have to admit you kinda do owe me an explanation.”
A wince steals its way to her face. Yes, she probably does. It’s not like it’s normal to collect your friends’ tears of joy. (But damn does she wish it was. Making the power up recipe would be so much easier.)
One of her fingers rubs against the vial over and over, and her eye keeps twitching.
“Marinette, my good friend and tear thief—”
A giggly snort is startled out of her.
His teeth peep out in a grin. “Is that what I’m going to have to call you now? Miss Tear Thief? Or would you rather I call you Mad Scientist? I should warn that if you don’t tell me what’s going on, I’ll assume you’re one of Hawkmoth’s henchman, codenamed the Tear Hoarder Princess, and have been assigned to collect my amazing, magical Chat Noir tears for some plan that—”
“St-stop.”
It’s hard to fight the giggles. She’ll be the one on the floor and making wheezing donkey noises any moment.
His joins in her laughter, but then his expression softens, a smile lingering in his eyes. “I really won’t judge. I’m just confused.”
She bites her lip. The seconds tick on.
“I … I’m sorry, Chat, but can we just leave it as for science?”
His nose scrunches. “You really don’t want to tell me that much?”
“It’s embarrassing.”
The excuse is flimsy on her tongue, but her kitty has always been respectful. She knows he won’t push if she asks him not to.
He stares at her for a moment before shrugging. “Okay. Hawkmoth’s henchman it is.”
Another laugh is dragged out of her. “Chat!”
“I did warn.”
But he also doesn’t push her for answers again. Not that night or any others. He’s a good kitty like that.
(And it’s only much, much later that she realises she could have just asked him as Ladybug to help her out.)
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The Battle Between Love and Fire-
Ivar the Boneless × Reader
Chapter Thirty-Nine
Chapter Forty *this is the longest chapter I have ever written! So make sure you bring your snacks and strap yourself in;)*
Word Count: over 6k
Warning: sex without consent, smut, fluff and heavy angst
You did not get much sleep on that night and neither did your beloved. His heart rate did not lower as the hours progressed. His jaw stayed clenched at the thought of his friend's attempt to kiss you. You are very beautiful, he gives him that, but that gives him no right to kiss his wife. He would never do that to Katya, so why would he do this to him? Oh, that is right. Him and Katya shared a kiss on that one night before the battle to win Kattegat back from his brother Bjorn. But how could Prince Oleg know? He pondered that question in his head over and over again. The only possible reason for him to do such a thing is because he found out about him and Katya's quick moment. She must have told him, or someone else did but he was not stupid enough to ask such a question. So he stayed still as he watched your eyelids struggle to stay closed. He knew that you were not sleeping either, but still, he held you in his arms and never let you go. And he made sure that his ax was by his bed and his dagger was on his waistband. He was not letting anyone touch you, or harm you in any way, shape, or form. You are his and his alone. If Prince Oleg thought differently, he has another thing coming for him, that is certain.
Soon enough, the sunshine crept its way through the windows of your chambers and Ivar lifted both of your bodies up from the warm pillows. You both sigh from the lack of sleep but he knew from the look on your face that you are struggling more than him. With you being several months pregnant, you need the sleep for both you and the baby.
Ivar "Sweetheart, you did not sleep at all?" You shake your head no, "Why? I was not going to let anyone-"
"I know, I know.."
Ivar "So why did you not sleep, hmm?" He places stray hairs behind your ears.
"Just an unnerving feeling. I don't like perverted men, Ivar. I thought that he was your friend."
Ivar "He is."
"Friends do not try to get their friend's wives into their bed, Ivar. He even offered!"
Ivar "I am aware Y/n. I will take care of this."
"If Hvitserk hasn't done that already." You snapped.
Ivar snickers, "What is that supposed to mean?"
"Hvitserk stopped him last night Ivar, that is what I meant."
Ivar "You-do not sit here and tell me that I never save you, that I never protect you! I am your king! I am your husband! Treat me like it huh?!" You laugh at his reaction. But it made you think: has Ivar ever saved you? Has he ever helped you? Helped you, oh absolutely! Saved you, no. Hvitserk has always been the one to save you. Hell, you were taken from your own home while Ivar slept beside you. So you laugh and get out of bed.
Ivar "And where do you think you are going?"
"I need to stretch my legs..beloved." You put on a fur blanket around your arms and chest to cover yourself up a bit before leaving the room. You had to walk away from Ivar, or else it would be a fight and you did not wish to have one with Ivar. It is useless. You would both feel like they're right so what is the point? It would only bring on a migraine, to which you already have one from the lack of sleep. Ivar just watches you leave and puts his head into the palms of his hands at the realization that you are absolutely right. Hvitserk was there for you last night..he was not. Hvitserk seems to always be there when you need him the most, but it should be the other way around and that makes Ivar feel like a horrible husband and king. He will never forgive himself for that night, because he could have stopped King Harald.
Ivar "What can I do?" He whispered to himself as he looked at the door his wife just left.
…
You meet Katya in the hallway and she stops you out of concern from the look on your face and the dark circles.
Katya "Oh darling, are you alright?"
"Oh yes, I am fine. Thank you."
Katya "Do not lie, there is no need for that, Y/n. I know that I met you yesterday but I have grown to like you. I am here for you, woman to woman, queen to queen..are you alright?"
"Just very tired. This baby is becoming too big for my body." You force a laugh because it was a lie. Your belly is very large but nothing that you cannot handle. You just did not feel like talking at the moment.
Katya "Oh, alright then. Could I do anything? Run you a bath, perhaps?"
"Oh that is too kind, but no thank you. I am actually going to go out for a walk-"
Ivar "Not without me, I hope." He says as he comes up from behind you. You look at him and then back at Katya. Her smile quickly fades when she sees that your smile is obviously not sincere.
"Of course, my love. You can walk with me." He smiles.
Ivar "Good morning, Princess. How was your night?"
Katya "It was fine, thank you for asking. And yours?"
Ivar "Just as fine, thank you. Now, If you'll excuse us."
Katya "Of course." She moves out of the way and lets the both of you pass her in the hallway. She can tell that something is off but she doesn't not know what.
Once you and Ivar are out of the doors of Prince Oleg's kingdom, he opens his mouth.
Ivar "I am sorry." You do not respond. "You do not accept my apology?"
"What exactly are you apologizing for, Ivar?"
Ivar "For not saving you, like I promised. I did not save you on-"
"We've gone over that millions of times, I forgive you."
Ivar "And I am sorry for not being there last night. I sensed something was..wrong when it took you so long. But I ignored my own thoughts. And I shouldn't have. I am sorry."
You nod, "Thank you. And I forgive you." He walks closer to you and kisses you on the forehead.
Ivar "I love you Y/n. I love you more than everything."
"I know. And I love you too-"
Prince Oleg "Ah, there you two are! Good morning!" You jolt when you hear his voice and you walk a few paces backwards.
Ivar "Mm, hello Oleg. Good morning."
Prince Oleg "What is the matter?! You two seem so down on this bright and lovely day."
"No sleep."
Prince Oleg "Oh, that is a shame. Was it the bed-"
Ivar "No, not at all. It was someone's actions that made the both of us uneasy." He says with direct eye contact, making Prince Oleg take a step back.
Prince Oleg "Oh, well..today is a new day. New beginnings! So, in celebration of your return..I have arranged a little play to be had in my front field, in a few hours."
"And what does this play entail?"
Prince Oleg "Uh uh uhh, that will be discovered when you arrive."
Ivar "We will be there.."
Prince Oleg "Wonderful. I will see you two very soon." He says as he pats Ivar on his shoulder and walks in the opposite direction. You look at Ivae in shock.
"He does plays now?"
Ivar "He has a weird skit thing that he does..little Igor even have dolls that he uses for reenactments."
"Wonderful. Why did you fail to tell me how Oleg really is, hmm?"
Ivar "I did tell you."
"All of the good things, but none of his strange tendencies."
Ivar "If you do not like him, why don't you leave? You are a queen, you can come and go as you please. If you do not like Prince Oleg, you can go home to Kattegat."
"I know that you do not mean that Ivar. So I am not going to take that to heart. But if you do not take care of what happened last night, and not take responsibility and accountability for me, I will be taking Ryuu and I will be gone within an hour. Do you understand me?" He smirks and chuckles a bit but then his eyes start to fill with tears. He does not speak, he only nods 'yes' and you walk away from him yet again.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hvitserk finds you sitting on the balcony, talking to the daughter in your belly and he stands there for only a moment, to admire you. You catch him and open your arms for him to hug you. You need his comfort after the long night and the argumentative morning that you have been having.
Hvitserk hums once you are in his arms and you just inhale his scent that engulfs your senses and warms your soul.
Hvitserk "I've got you." He says as he rubs small circles around the small of your back and you smile.
"How did you sleep?" You say as he lets go.
Hvitserk "Not even a single hour..and you?"
"Notta.." you both laugh at the deliriousness.
Hvitserk "I just sat in the doorway and kept an eye on your room. I didn't like what happened last night."
"You did that?"
Hvitserk "Of course I did."
"You did not have too, Ivar slept with his-"
Hvitserk "Dagger. Yeah, he always does. Ever since that night, he always sleeps with it on him.. or next to him. But, a dagger is useless if you do not wake up in enough time to use it, aye?"
You nod, "Yeah, I guess you are right."
Hvitserk "What is on your mind, kitten."
"I am just looking forward to going home. Ivar and I have been arguing all morning."
Hvitserk "I figured that. But it is normal..it is okay to have arguments. It is okay to have outbursts and tiffs..but you fight with love. It's never anger, it is out of love."
"That is a great way to put it, Hvitserk. I will have to remember that."
Hvitserk "So, what were you telling our little angel in there?" He says as he places his hands over your belly.
"Ohh, just a lullaby."
Hvitserk "Sing it to me." He smiles once you smile and he lies his head on your belly as you sing it to him. You fiddle with his braids as you sing and he rubs your belly for you. And occasionally kisses it, making you giggle because it tickles you.
Hvitserk "You aren't ticklish there when we are in bed-" your jaw drops and you smack his arm playfully, making him burst out laughing. "I am not wrong."
"I know but shush, come back and let me finish my lullaby." He complies and you sing until the very end. Once it ends, he leans up and kisses you before helping you up from the lounge chair.
Hvitserk "That was beautiful, princess."
"You think she heard it?"
Hvitserk "Of course she did. And she smiled, but we cannot see that yet."
"Hmm. Prince Oleg has a play..it is supposed to start in a hour or so."
Hvitserk "Ah yes, I remember his plays. They are quite interesting."
"Help me pick out a dress, will you?"
Hvitserk "It would be my pleasure." You walk back into the home and he helps you pick out a beautiful white dress for the scheduled play. Today is going to be a warm day which excites you and Hvitserk. Because your little one is going to be born in the summer season!
Ivar thinks long and hard on how he is going to confront Prince Oleg without it becoming a huge fight and someone ending up hurt or worse. Having two ill-tempered kings is not a good mix but somehow, they are friends? Nonetheless, he found Prince Oleg talking to a few of his people, trying to prep them for the play when Ivar interrupts him.
Ivar "We need to have a little talk, Prince Oleg."
Prince Oleg "Can it wait?"
Ivar "No, I'm afraid it is urgent." Prince Oleg looks at his people, whispered a few words and then they left Ivar and him to talk in private.
Prince Oleg "What is it, my friend?"
Ivar "It has come to my knowledge that you made advances to my wife, last night."
Prince Oleg "And who told you that?"
Ivar "My wife!"
Prince Oleg "And you believe everything that woman tells you?"
Ivar "Of course I do. I love her and she loves me-"
Prince Oleg "Ohh, poor Ivar..so nai-"
Ivar "I am telling you right now, if you do not keep your hands and your perverted mouth away from my wife, you are asking for a war. Do you understand me, huh?!" Ivar was not going to allow this man to twist his marriage when he was in the wrong. So he shouted that, for his people to overhear and they began to stare. That made Prince Oleg feel the pressure and realize that he needs to agree or he would be having a war in a few days time.
Prince Oleg starts to laugh out of shock and nervousness, "Okay, okay..I heard you Ivar the Boneless."
Ivar "Have I made myself clear, my friend? She is mine and mine alone. She is not a slave nor is she going to be your play-thing...understood?"
Prince Oleg sighs, "But she is-" Ivar takes out his dagger and places it to Oleg's throat. Specifically, right on his vein that would kill him in a matter of seconds if cut.
Ivar "If you want to play this game, Prince Oleg...would you like to die by my blade.. or by dragon?" Prince Oleg stammers and looks at the massive creature that is licking his lips as he stares at the man that his father has a blade to.
Prince Oleg "Oka-okay! We have an understanding! I am sorry, just get off of me!" Ivar backs off and puts his blade in his waistband.
Ivar "Good. Now, go on and finish getting your people ready for this play of yours. Wouldn't want to displease us, now would you? You have already been so rude to your guest, wouldn't want-"
Prince Oleg "She will love the play, I am sure of it."
Ivar "Good, that is good huh?!" He playfully hits Oleg on the shoulder.
Prince Oleg "Of course. I sincerely apologize Ivar.."
Ivar "Good. After the play or before..you can apologize to the woman that you treated with disrespect. And see if she accepts your apology." He walks away before Oleg has the chance to respond. Leaving him out of breath from that shock of fear, it was startling to say the least. He looks at Ivar and back at Ryuu who is still gawking at him with his fangs out. Prince Oleg hurries his way to his people and pretends like nothing happened.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When you are finished getting ready with Hvitserk, Ivar is coming into the doors of the palace. Katya is goofing around with Igor in the foyer. She smiles when she sees you walking in the room.
Katya "Well, don't you look gorgeous!"
"Thank you, beautiful! So are you." She thanks you and gives you a quick hug while Hvitserk walks up to Ivar.
Hvitserk "Did you make it clear?"
Ivar "Of course I did, my brother. "
Hvitserk "What did you tell him?"
Ivar "Ahh let's just say, it was either he died by my blade or by Y/n's dragon so he apologized." They both burst out laughing, making you and Katya look in their direction.
Katya "What is it?"
Ivar "Oh I just scared your husband a little bit..!"
Katya "Oh, of course you did. You can't help yourself, can you?"
Ivar "He deserved it."
Katya "What did he do and what did you do?" Ivar crutches his way over to Katya and looks down at you and then back at her.
Ivar "Your husband tried to touch and kiss my wife." She looks at you and you look down. That is all the confirmation that she needed. "So I told your husband to stop his perverted attempts at getting with my pregnant wife or me or Y/n's dragon will take care of him for his actions."
Katya "Y/n I-I am so sorry! I had no idea-"
"Katya it is okay."
Katya "It is not okay. You are now my friend and I care for you. Why didn't you tell me?"
"I just wanted to forget about it, to tell you the complete truth. I have been through a lot in my life and I am used to that behavior..so I am fine, trust me."
Katya "What do you mean? How could one get used to that?"
Hvitserk "Alright, let's go outside and enjoy this weather..shall we?"
"Mm, yes. Ivar, is it warm out yet?"
Ivar "It is warming up, my love."
"Good! Let's go then-"
Igor "Are you alright?" You look down at the young man and you place your hand on his shoulder, and smile down at him.
"I am now, thank you for asking. Hey," you crouch to his level, "how would you like to pet a dragon?"
Igor "I can pet him?"
"Mhm. He is very kind and very gentle."
Igor "Then I would love to!"
"Okay, let's go see him then." He takes your hand and you thank Ivar with your eyes and he smiles at you with pure love.
Hvitserk "Let's join her." Katya and Ivar nod and walk after you. Katya is in shock that her husband did that and she had no idea of that even occurring. Normally, he would brag about it to Katya to make her feel worthless but not last night. This was news to her and sad news at that. She has grown fond of you so to know that that happened, angers and saddens her. But thankfully, Ivar took care of it. He saved you. This time, he saved you.
…
Igor spent a good long while with Ryuu: bonding with him, pet his scales, he even got to hug his leg! He thanked you for that opportunity and hugged you for what felt like an eternity. A hug from a child or in this case, a young man, is a hug like no other. It brings you a joy that does not come from an adult or an elder. It makes you feel so good about yourself and it makes you feel a sense of adoration that no other age can offer. Hvitserk and Ivar watched as Igor clung to your waist with smiles on their faces. Knowing how wonderful of a mother you are going to be.
Katya "Alright, young Prince..let her breathe now.."
Igor "Oop, sorry!"
"No need to be sorry! I love your hugs!" He smiles and you kiss Ryuu's snout as a 'good boy' because Igor and Katya do not know that you can communicate with your dragon(s). So with that kiss, he knew that he was a good boy. Then suddenly, a bell was rung and everyone was meant to gather around to watch the play.
Igor "Bye Ryuu!" He said as he ran to the front yard. You all giggle at how cute that whole encounter was.
Katya "How did you train him to be so..tamed?"
"I raised him. I got him along with two of his siblings. They were given to me for my 20th birthday. Ever since then, I have raised them and cared for them. Along with Ivar and Hvitserk."
Katya "You raised dragons?" She looked at Ivar.
Ivar chuckles, "She is giving me too much credit. When I met them, they were very little, but not quite babies. I simply helped feed them and cared for them. Y/n did all of the hard stuff."
Katya nods, "Well, you are an incredible woman Y/n. You should be proud of all of your achievements."
"Thank you, Katya. That means a lot to me." She smiles and she continues to walk with the three of us to the front yard to join the people of Kiev.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
As the play began, everything was normal and simple. Very complex and artistic play that was very amusing. That is until Prince Oleg called his wife down to join him for a skit. She hesitated for a minute and then gave into his need because he gave her the 'look'.
"Oh gods, what is he going to do to her?"
Ivar "Nothing bad, I am sure of it."
"If he starts, he is going to become ashes.."
Hvitserk "Shh, kitten. He's not going to hurt his own wife." Ivar looks at him and then he remembers that Oleg killed his first wife. One of the reasons why him and Ivar bonded was because Ivar did the same thing and Prince Oleg admired that, for some sickening reason that Hvitserk could never comprehend.
Hvitserk "Nevermind..just relax Y/n. Katya is strong, like you. She can handle her own." You don't respond, you only keep an eye on her and his movements.
Prince Oleg began to talk his nonsense and started to dance with her. It was sort of beautiful to watch two lovers dance before your eyes. Your nerves calmed down quite a bit, however, that was only for a split second. Prince Oleg switched like a light switch on a wall, and pinned her to the ground. You look over at Ivar and he does not move, his emotions just change.
Hvitserk "What the hell.." Hvitserk could not finish before Prince Oleg undressed his wife in front of everyone in Kiev and used her to please himself. You had to get up and walk away because she was screaming in agony, not ecstacy. Hvitserk follows you but Ivar stays to watch.
Hvitserk "Are you alright?"
"Flashbacks..I'll be fine I just need to catch my breath."
Hvitserk "Hey, shh shh shh..I've got you." He holds you close and walks you far enough away from the yard to where you could not hear Katya no longer.
"I want to kill that man."
Hvitserk "You cannot kill him, Y/n. If you could, I would help you..but we cannot."
"He deserves it after what he is doing to her. He is humiliating her, torturing her, using her-"
Hvitserk "I kn-"
"How can I stand there and watch a woman go through what I went through? What can I do to help her?"
Hvitserk "I do not know, kitten. He is the king-"
"And I am a queen."
Hvitserk "Yes you are, but you are not in Kattegat. You are in his kingdom."
"His kingdom..we'll see about that." You push your way through Hvitserk and rush your way through the crowd that is dancing around Prince Oleg and Katya. He is still using her when you push him off of her. When he is on the ground, you help your friend off of the ground and hurriedly get her covered up. When she is covered up, she punches her husband so hard in the mouth that his lip spits. You pull her back and she just bursts out crying on your arms, almost pushing you over because you are so off-balance being as pregnant as you are.
Prince Oleg "How dare you defy me?!"
"How dare you do this to your wife?! How dare you use her like your slave? How dare you humiliate her in front of her people? You should be ashamed of yourself." He is speechless. You walk her through the ground when all of a sudden, you hear women start to cheer for you. Cheering for your bravery and your strength to stand up for women like you did. When you look around you, you find Ivar standing up and clapping for you. He mouths, "I am so proud of you." You just smile and continue on walking Katya back to the palace.
…
When she gets in, she stops you and hugs you so tight that you can barely breathe. You just hold onto her as you ride out the emotions with her.
"I could not let him do that to you any longer. You did not deserve, nor will you ever deserve to be treated in such a way."
Katya "I am used to it. But this, this was the first."
"I am used to it as well."
Katya "Ivar-"
"No no, never Ivar. For a long time, it was my own father, then it was another king who took me from Kattegat and tortured me for many days. So yes, I know how you felt. How you feel right now."
Katya "What did you do?"
"Well, for a while, I just took it. But when I found Ivar, he gave me the strength to do what needed to be done."
Katya "Tell me what you did."
"The king that tortured me in my own father's dungeon...was burned to ashes as he stood. And for my father, well...he ended up with the same fate."
Katya "Oh my gods.."
"Men like them should not be allowed to continue."
Katya nods, "I will take care of him. When I am strong enough. But as of right now, I am in a lot of pain, I am going to take a shower. Y/n, thank you so much for what you did back there. I don't know how I could ever repay you."
"There is no need. I am glad that I was there to help you. Go on now, but remember to take it easy."
Katya "I will, I will see you when I can." You nod and when she is out of your sight, you walk your way to a chair that is the closest to you and collapse on it.
Ivar "My love, are you alright?" He shouts when he finds you sitting there.
"Fine, just fine."
Ivar "You always amaze me, my love. You are stronger than I am."
"I just stand up for what is right. I could not allow him-"
Prince Oleg "How dare you?!"
"Me? How dare you?" Hvitserk and Ivar stand in front of you to guard you from Prince Oleg.
Hvitserk "Back up!"
Prince Oleg "How dare you interrupt me!? I was almost finished, you know!"
"Ivar.."
Ivar takes a few steps forward and gets in Oleg's face, "I know why you did that to Katya, Prince Oleg."
Prince Oleg "Oh..?"
Ivar "You did not get my wife last night so you used your wife instead." He does not answer, only smirks. "I bet, you imagined fucking my wife..didn't you?" He chuckles, "That is all of the validation that I need. My love, we are leaving now."
"But Katya, how can I leave her?"
Ivar "I care about your life and your safety, not hers. We need to leave."
Hvitserk "Ivar is right."
"I need to say goodbye, keep him out of her room." They both nod and keep an eye on you as you rush into her room. She is still in the shower but you do not care. You hug her and whisper in her ear, "I have to go, my friend. I am not safe here any longer, but I need to tell you something. If you ever feel unsafe, please come to my home. You are always welcome and you are more than welcome to stay for as long as you need. Please, take up for yourself, dear friend..be safe."
Katya "Thank you, I will." You rush out and take your husband's hand and rush out of the palace.
Prince Oleg "Please do return soon! You are always welcome in my home, Y/n." Hvitserk helps you up on Ryuu and Ivar gets in his carriage.
Ivar "Do not expect to hear from me or any of us, ever again.."
Prince Oleg "Oh do not be like this, Ivar! You are my friend."
Ivar "I was, not anymore. You stay away from my family." He strikes his horse once Hvitserk is mounted on his horse and you lift off on Ryuu. Gladly heading home.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The journey home felt like it took forever. Your energy is completely spent and your body hurts from the lack of sleep. All you can think about is being home with Ivar and Hvitserk and seeing Ubbe and Torvi. Then you realize that you were supposed to stay for a week! A week in that kingdom! All you know is that Ubbe is definitely going to ask questions but you are honestly dreading answering them. Hopefully Ivar will do the answering for you so that you can rest. Hvitserk can sense your exhaustion and just wants to make you feel better and at ease. Hopefully once you are home, you will feel ease.
Neith and Eldr fly up in the air to greet you and Ryuu. You swear that your dragons are just as needy as toddlers even though they are massive in size.
"Hi, my loves. You have been good, I hope." Ryuu lands and you use his wing to get down gently. Ubbe is already by your side as soon as you look up from the ground.
Ubbe "Hey sis..why are you-"
"Long story. Maybe ask Ivar or Hvitserk what all went down in Kiev but I am so glad to see you." He pulls you into his arms and holds you for what feels like hours. His brotherly love is what you missed and what you needed.
Ubbe "Are you alright? You seem sad, Y/n."
"I am just glad to be home, where is Torvi?"
Ubbe "She is inside, feeding the kids." Ivar and Hvitserk ride up and you hug Ubbe one more time before going inside to search for Torvi. Your people stop you of course, telling you that they are happy to see you but questioning why you are back so early. You inform them that everything is fine but we all just needed to come home. They did not question any further and let you get inside. You find Torvi in no time at all but her daughter runs to you first.
"Y/N!!" She runs to you and you pick her up in your arms.
"Hi my lovebug!"
"You are home early!"
"We are! We all just missed you so much."
Torvi "Alright, you are hogging her..it's my turn." She takes her daughter from your arms and places her back down to the ground. You get choked up once you are in her embrace but you knock yourself out of it. "Are you okay?" She whispered to you.
"I am now."
Torvi "What has happened? You all were supposed to stay a week, maybe even longer."
"It is a long story. But we needed to get home."
Torvi "Well, whenever you are ready to tell me, I am all ears."
"Okay, I love you."
Torvi "I love you too. I am glad that you are home."
"Me too." Soon enough, Ivar and Hvitserk come in with Ubbe and Ubbe looks infuriated. You gather that one of them told him what Oleg has done to you and Katya.
*CONTINUING ON A NEXT PAGE*
@hvitserkmarcosource @a-mess-of-fandoms @youbloodymadgenius @ivarsgoddess @heavenly1927 @saldelys @herestherealproblem
#alex hogh andersen#hvitserk#vikings#ivar the boneless#marco ilsø#ubbe lothbrok#the battle between love and fire#torvi vikings
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Mirror, Mirror | [ Cursed!Ivar x Modern!Reader ]
❛ pairing | cursed!ivar x modern! disabled (cleft lip sooo)! latina!reader
❛ type | ( ? )
❛ summary | after ivar kills his son, the witch freydis, his wife, curses him. somehow, he ends up with you.
❛ warnings | witch!freydis, POC reader, disabled reader, modern fic, cursed!ivar, modeling/elements, mention of self hate, sweet uncles, SFW
❛ sy’s notes | happy Monday everyone! how are we doing? are we surviving the coronapocalypse? I hope so. I come to you with another fruit of my eccentric, written all in one shot, writing. this request was left over from my Ivar 5CW event.
“I got you something for your surgery. See looks just like you, right, good girl?” your uncle rushed into your room, full militant uniform, with the great mirror between his aged fingers. As a military mechanic, his schedule was often too full to have time for lunch, but today was different. He sets it down, a soft tuft of dust floats free, and you cough in its wake.
“Where did you get this, tio?”
“Estate sale on Cherry. Imported by the dead guy, uhh… Mr… Borg,” he answers, flicking his hands in the air in circles as if he’s trying to remember the guy’s name. As he rambles on about the dead man you look to the empty wall, soft grey and bland, just like you’ve wanted to paint your walls-- now that you could! Because unlike the other houses, this great expanse is all yours. You could paint it rainbow colour, flick some glitter up there, and seal it if you so damn wanted. Instead, you settled on a subtle grey. The soft pink dries on your accent wall, waiting for your bountiful French decor.
“From where?” you slur out, smoothing out the bottom of your sundress, and point toward the wall where you wanted the giant mirror to go. It would encompass the wall. But you’d feel like you always wanted to: like a princess. “China?”
“Tsk! China!” He booms half insulted in the way he drags it out, smacking his hat against his palm. “Scandinavia!”
“Scandinavia isn’t a country.”
“Ay,” he walks toward the mattress on the newly mopped floor, picking up a nail that you set on your bed. “Stop giving me a hard time. I bought it for you, eh? Wasn’t cheap!”
It didn’t look cheap, either. It sweeps nearly the size of your tall uncle, its silver designs swirling around, flourishing along the top. It’s lovely. It fits your aesthetic, even. It’d make for some good pictures, too.
“Thank you tio,” you answer, putting that picture-perfect smile on. He’s a proud man when he mounts that mirror up, securing it with some strange hook and chain type restraints. It’ll smash ya, he said! Maybe it could have, but when all is said and done, and you stand before the massive mirror, it’s a strange type of beautiful. Ethereal as it was, something felt… off behind its reflection. Your nails skim the surface of the glass, repetitive click after click,
“How are the stitches feeling?” he asks.
You lift your fingers up, inching toward the puffy flesh of your mangled lip. The stitches would look like shit now. “Dr. Rao fixed it.”
“Tch, he better’ve. How did he do it wrong the first time?” he asks, and you shrug your shoulders, as if you don’t know. What were you, a plastic surgeon? “Since you’re feelin’ good again… Make me a tunafish before I go!”
Should have said no. But you weren’t going to say no to your uncle’s love for salty fish squashed between two pieces of wheat bread and some scraggly salad. You’re sure the mirror caused three times that. Okay, maybe more like thirty… or three hundred.
Good body, but you don’t have the face for it. Try photography. The university has a good program.
Stapled to your portfolio is that one little note. A woman’s would be kind words plastered onto the front as a friendly word of advice. Give up, move on. Something out the bright limelight. You kick off your shoes at the door, thrash the door shut, pop the lock. Set dinner on the counter. Don’t eat it. Head to your room and thrash that door too. Drop the portfolio on the desk in front of the obnoxious mirror and sink into the plush white comforter.
And you breathe. Your chest swells deep with breath, and it's prickly against your lungs, as if it hurt. Your sparkly phone vibrates with your friends’ many questions. Did you get it? Do models get paid per shoot? A hundred considerate questions and maybe, they all failed to give the one comment you needed to hear from anyone of them. Ms. Bisset had dragged the knife of disappointment across your belly, disemboweled you until nothing but disappointment, remorse, and self-hate poured out onto your toes.
“Your face looks better than hers.”
You shoot up, hair matted to the soaked pieces of hair against your cheek, turning side to side. No one was in your room, and yet, you felt them here. Their gaze poisoning the sanctity of your private place-- where you could cry and no one would know better. You lurch out, flip your phone, and there’s nothing there. And again, you reach out, only this time its to the knife at the bottom of the top drawer of your nightstand. You slip out of your fluffy sheets, quaking around the handle, turning it over and over, and over and over, looking around and around.
“Who’s there?!”
The room stretches inhumanely. As if the walls goes on for a mile or longer. You swirl, and your white dress follows, but nothing else. No matter how you pace from one end, to the other, and around the corners. “You’re getting close,” the voice laughs, and there’s a gentleness behind that statement. “No… nope, no. In the chest, really?”
You stomp toward the sheer white curtains, hiking them back, as if you’d really see anyone there. The warm sunlight streams against your skin, down in your bones, and there’s nothing or no one there.
“What the fuck,” you whisper, but no one is there to answer, and you’re sure. You’ve checked your closet, under the bed, over the bed, in the chest, by every nook and cranny and-- you look up, under your desk, and that’s when you see it. Two slouched legs, dependent upon a inky black and ragged crutch. You scan him over, something of a medieval horror, because he’s all leather, and chainmail, and locks, and buckles, and god he’s big in his own way, encompassing the mirror-like a cloud of black death.
But he’s not.
“There you go! Checkmate.” Despite those worn hands, his pale face is chiseled as if by a sculptor. High cheekbones, a pronounced forehead, and a broad nose. His hair is in its own way lifelike, braided back behind his head. His dull expression comes alive in bright blue eyes, excitably staring to you, and past you. His armour clinks. You grasp the knife, flicking it at the mirror.
“Watch out.” He warns, and you duck, because the mirror reflects your knife, chucking it into your beautifully painted wall. It embeds straight out into the wall, and you screech, both for your lovely wall but also the great loss of your mind. There was a man. In the mirror. Of your house. You’re stepping back, staring behind you, then back again. He’s there in the mirror, but not beside you, where you imagine his large body to be overtaking your petite frame.
“What the fuck are you?”
“Ivar,” he answers. Igor-- like those old Frankenstein movies? “Igor?”
His fingers flick, rattling irritation. “Ivar the Boneless.”
“Who?”
He leers behind that glass. For that awful leer of unchecked power, slamming his hand onto the other side of that glass, there’s nothing to be said for it. It’s as if he thinks you should know, because his lip wrinkles, and he turns toward his surroundings. Within the mirror, craggy, dark surroundings. He collapses on a bed of furs, which you can only just so make out because it is directly behind him.
“I am… was a king,” Ivar explains. Though this is all one great illusion, you’re curious enough in it, because what else did you have to do but sulk? Your hand goes toward the holy oil your tio had so graciously left, telling you to smear it all over, sanctify the mirror because who knows what kind of creepie demons were in that thing, and maybe you should have listened, and maybe he knew better.
“I’m not dead,” he snorts, “Take your little Christian bottle and spray for demons somewhere else.”
“Then what are you,” you play along. Ivar, for all his snappy wisdom, falls quiet a moment. He unlatches the armour on his legs, slides out of some medieval torture device that held his legs mishappen and weird.
“Cursed,” he answers. “...by my witch of an ex-wife and her little--” bastard, you almost read, but the pain in which he said it, suppressed any meaning behind it. It’s as if he dies a little when he says such a thing.
“It… wasn’t yours?”
“The wretch couldn’t be mine,” he says factually. For a man as strong as he was, you wonder why. Why was he explaining this to you, who he had only just met, and then again-- why not? If this Ivar brain illusion was locked up as long as he was, hey, maybe you’d be aching for company too. He gestures from his pronounced nose down, over his full lips. “His lips… his nose. They were torn one to another.”
“A cleft lip?” he sighs, dipping his gloved hands behind his head. He doesn’t lift, not even when you shriek, coming closer now. You climb over the white desk on your knees. “I had a cleft lip!”
He turns up his head, bitter at the mention, as if ice had stabbed not only him-- but straight through him, too. Even more than talk of his wife, talk of the small child seems to wound him. A wretch, a bastard-- “What happened to him?”
He turns in his bed, bound to ignore you, when you slap the glass, shaking the very foundation of the wooden boards under the bed. “I killed him-- I killed me son.” He answers, and the words sound heartless to you, torn as they were, pained as they were. When he turns up his head, you connect with his eyes, desperate to give sense to murder. “He was in pain. He could not live like that, mocked by everyone he meets, loves.”
You hold his words close, looking down, the scratchy handwriting from your denied portfolio sits there, a reminder of his words.
“That’s why you’re in the mirror.” He clasps his hands together, leaning forward, and unclasps again, offering up toward the dark nothingness and it’s detached light which lights his bed from seemingly nowhere at all. “Well, good. You deserve to be in that mirror for what you’ve done.”
He doesn’t deny it. He turns, all alone, abandoned in his bed. You wonder how long he’s been there. Has it been a short time? Has it been a long time? It’s not been in the last five hundred years, for his clothes look aged. Maybe a thousand. But you don’t really know. Whoever this Ivar the Boneless was, he was an old man.
“I meant what I said,” his voice is rough, almost quaky. Is he crying? His words grace your skin like feathers, tickling you into interest for what he might say next. You settle into your chair at the desk.
“What?”
“Your face is more beautiful than hers,” he prompts. “Ms. Bisset.”
“How did you know her name?”
Ivar rumbles in his laughter, his broad back flexing. “You talk to yourself more than you’d think. And when you’re not talking to yourself, you leave all the important articles on your desk.”
It’s true. You scramble to stuff them into their appropriate folders, cursing him for being as he was. A nosy man with no sense of morals. If you were locked in a mirror, wouldn’t you have nothing to do but snoop around? You make note-- buy a cat. At least then, you wouldn’t feel your mind running away on you.
“That means a lot,” you mutter, “Coming from an ableist.”
Ivar pulls his armour off. Strip by agonizing strip, until he’s nothing but well formed muscles in his inky trousers, matching the blotchy black tattoo of dragons that course by the back of his neck. You spin around in your chair, hands to your eyes, chanting ‘I see nothing!’ as if… if you said it enough times, maybe it would be true. “Product of my time.”
He rests.
“Isn’t that a bit much?”
Hallucination or real, you came to accept that Ivar the Boneless, some kinda Viking-King was here for good. His mirror is the best mirror to do your make up in due to the great natural light that filtered in, but also the worst for his companionship was always awful. WIth every flick of your eyeshadow brush painted in bright red, Ivar had a sing song opinion.
“You look better natural.”
He’s not a fan of this whole fashion eye you were going for. Vibrant hot red and warm blues weren’t his favourite, especially not blue, because they reminded him of his brother Sigurd. Gods rest his soul, he told you. He killed him too.
“Ivar, for fuck’s sake.”
“You talk to your tio like that?” he scrunches his fingers.
“It’s not a date, Ivar.”
Tch, Ivar drags out, throwing his hands behind his head, annoyed in the way that he plops back onto his bed. Ivar’s ideal take? Dewy, natural, something with a hint of colour and a well-flicked eyeliner. Not a fan of caterpillar lashes, as he called them. He did like a perfect red lip, which you only learned by angling your television toward his mirror, so that he might be able to watch while you were out on the town with Igor, the orange tabby cat.
“Then what is it?”
His eyes falter, falling to the red satin romper you wear, as if you know, and he knows, that you’re up to no good. “Fashion shoot.” You answer him. “If they won’t publish me, I’ll publish myself.”
Ivar’s lips quiver, amused, and he smiles as you pomp those soft curls. It’s sultry, sexy, defined. He doesn’t think it needs to be. But it’s bold and only a fool would deny how beautiful you looked, dolled up more beautifully than even his late Freydis. He was here because of his son, placed into a home with a woman who had the same condition as his late, beautiful baby boy. It wasn’t on accident.
Ivar smiles. “Be ruthless.”
So you try, settling yourself on the edge of the bed next to the tripod, gliding your fingers over your dress, considering yourself. “What, no set design?” he asks.
“Set design?” you ask, laughing at the concept. Behind you is the soft pink accent wall, bouncing against the other walls behind you, soft and sweet. That’s all that was needed, really. Or so you thought.
“I’ve been in whorehouses with more taste.”
Ivar, you grumble, bounding off of the bed. Then, standing before him, your hands slap on your thighs. “Well what do you suggest?”
He leans out, gesturing his fingers toward the curtains. “Pull those dust catchers you call blinds shut. Add some soft flowers.”
You rush out of the room on bare toes, rushing back from your craft closet, arms full of fake flowers. You arrange them around your balcony bed, passionate and red. “Like this?” you crawl back on the lip, taking your place on the bed. Ivar leans, his cheek against the cold glass.
“Good enough.”
By now, you’re used to Ivar’s comments. Fashion shoots are on the daily, and as much as he detested the colour, you’ve grown used to his comments. You learn that he is better suited for creating a good background. Something about Ivar is all show, all flash, and you love that. In place of a friend to push you along, there’s Ivar. Always looking forward to giving you opinions about where to place this, or that, and Igor get the fuck out!
Priceless, like you said.
But as you progressed, and Ivar sat trapped in the mirror, something ate at you. When Ivar was not on his crutch, he would throw himself on the ground and drag himself like a giant snake across the ground wherever he went. He never once said a word about your crooked lips. The stitches faded. It was a gnarly scar in its place now, which hardly commanded attention save from the men you met on the daily, who all at least asked what was different about your face at one time or another, or excused themselves and never came back.
“You finally took my advice,” Ivar looks at you, dolled up like he liked. Soft curls, soft make up, a white dress. The gentle purity reminds him of his mother, Aslaug, or so he told you. You peer up at him, dragging the eyeliner out.
“Maybe it looks better like this,” you tease, and the thought hits you. “I’m guessing you have more experience than me, chulito. You’ve been in that mirror for 1200 years, you know.”
“Mostly in whorehouses. Wasn’t all bad, eh? Imagine my chances at finding a virgin with a cleft lip to set me free.”
“I bet you miss your family,” you tell him. Or what was left of it-- that was.
“I miss my brother Hvitserk,” he admits. The one brother, that though they both fought, he still found love in his heart for him. “And my mother,” tears gather, welling at his almond-shaped eyes, and you’ve done it again. “Freydis.”
“Would she take you back?”
“No,” his form drops, “You know I killed her.”
“A common theme,” you tease, drawing a small smile of him. But he drops his head down, cupping his hand behind his thick neck, lost in thought. “Ivar it-- it’s okay. You’re not a monster, y’know.”
“Aren’t I?”
He has a reputation for it. The names, the numbers, the people, the death. So, so much death. If he were here, today, they would call him a serial killer. A terrible man. A demon. When he sits there, unresponsive, you press your fingers to the glass.
“You aren’t,” you swipe the words from his lips, he has nothing to do but back away. Hope and pray you drop the subject, move on. He’s done talking again. This time you don’t. “Ivar-- you aren’t.”
You turn your fist to the mirror, crack your well-formed fist straight on. As opposed to the last time, reflecting the so deemed flimsy metal of your sword, your fist fractures the glass. It clatters around your fist, falling apart into a million tiny shards on the back of your blood, seeping into the mirror. But it’s cemented there, suspended in the air. Eyes wide, Ivar’s chest swells with air, and you roll your scarred lip into your mouth.
Then, the shards drop. The mirror cracks like a halo around your feet.
@tephi101 @alicedopey @supernaturalvikingwhore @tootie-fruity @titty-teetee @queen-see-ya-in-valhalla @ethereallysimple @deathbyarabbit @deathbyarabbit @readsalot73 @natalie-rdr @lol-haha-joke @lisinfleur @hissouthernprincess @marvelousse @dangerous-like-a-loaded-pistol @vikingsmania @wish-i-was-a-mermaid @lif3snotouttogetyou @gruffle1 @cris101071 @gold-dragon-slayer @babypink224221 @wonderwoman292 @naaladareia @beyond-the-ashes @generic-fangirl @chinduda @laketaj24, @peaceisadirtyword, @ly–canthrope @cris101071 @daughterofthenight117 @unassumingviking @ladyofsoa, @inforapound @winchesterwife27 @feyrearcheron44 @readsalot73 @squirrelacorngliterfarts @gold-dragon-slayer @medievalfangirl @sallydelys @bluearchersstuff @affectionrabbitt @whatamood13 @notyouraveragegirl17 @igetcarriedawaywithyou @unacceptabletatertots @ivarandersen @stra-vage @tgrrose @cookies186 @learninglemni-blog @theleeshanotlouise @soiproclaim @msmorganforever
#Ivar x Reader#ivar the boneless/reader#ivar the boneless x reader#ivar's heathen army#Ivar the Boneless imagines#vikings imagines#vikings imagine#vikings/reader#Vikings x reader#ivar
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I love your comic with akako and kaito! I also have been trying to figure out how I'd like to reconceptualize Akako in some writing that I'm doing, but I've been feeling a little stumped. Would you mind sharing some of your Akako thoughts / headcanons?
hell yeha im just gonna wordvomit some stuff about her then
i pretty much scrap the lucifer/demonic aspect with whatever im doing with her just because i dont jive with it that much, and thats a personal preference. i saw her gaudy egyptian clothes and went SHES KEMETIC I NEVER SEE KEMETICS IN MEDIA SHES KEMETIC NOW
in verses and crossovers where Magic Is A Thing then i keep her at roughly the same power level as the manga--able to hypnotize people, fly, voodoo dolls that work, rituals for elaborate and powerful spells, straight up visions from a crystal ball--all that fun stuff.
BUT if im in a mundane verse (which is... most of them) then i tone her WAY the fuck down and make her basically like... a real life witch. does she have power/real magic? well thats kind of up to the reader. she believes she does, as it’s part of her practice and religion. but its more of divination with tarot, energy work, spells to increase luck, some rituals on the full moon and maybe the occasional spirit/ghost summoning if circumstances call for it.
a handful of headcanons regardless of how much magic she can do:
172cm / 5′8″
Born August 8th (Leo)
She’s trans.
Probably straight.
Possibly has (undiagnosed) narcissistic personality disorder? Still debating on this one but I think it fits.
Kemetic, meaning she worships Egyptian deities. (Specifically Thoth.)
Has a mild obsession with lavender-scented things.
Carries lapis lazuli and onyx in her purse.
but ALSO ive got kind of a loose backstory with how ive reimagined her for my own stuff which im still working on but heres my thoughts:
Her weird henchman is scrapped completely.
Her parents are dead and she was raised by her grandma, who taught her about witchcraft and Kemeticism.
She’s trans and realized it when she was pretty young, maybe 8 or so, and her grandma didn’t entirely understand it but she was supportive and went along with her wearing girls clothes and all that stuff--had some trouble with the name change, but it wasnt malicious. She was just Old and had a hard time remembering Akako’s new name.
Combination of having a really overbearing/commanding personality combined with transphobia means she had pretty much no friends in school.
Really REALLY attached to her grandma and when she died (Akako was 11ish) it left her kind of lost. She got taken in by a (distant?) uncle (replacement for igor i guess) who wasn’t cold to her, but he didn’t know how to take care of kids and Akako shut herself away and ended up clinging really hard to witchcraft as a way to try and keep her herself together.
Moved away to live on her own as soon as she could. Still gets a small allowance from her uncle, but she supports herself with a part-time job doing... something, I’ll get around to figuring that out.
Going into highschool she 1) made sure no one knew she was trans and 2) upped her sex appeal to gain more attention because... lonely. Hence her boy-crazy tendencies. It’s gotten her superficial popularity, but no real friendships or relationships.
“All men will be my slaves” is replaced with toying with boy’s hearts and stringing them along to get what she wants, and she has a hard time seeing why it’s wrong because she doesn’t really have anyone to tell her no, and has no healthy relationships to fill the void if she stops. It also applies to stringing along older men sometimes, like in their 20s, but like everything else: nothing ever actually happens. She just likes playing with them. (in a verse with magic, hypnotism still applies.)
She sets her sights on Kaitou Kid because she wants what she can’t have ofc, and Kaitou Kid seems like a pretty good prize--and gets pissy when he doesn’t respond to her advances.
She and Kaito kind of become friends under duress (Kaito doesn’t like her knowing that he’s Kid and that she’s always coming onto him, she wants something more than friendship.) They kinda slip into it accidentally.
Actually she and Kaito have to have a screaming match before they can actually settle in as friends, specifically pertaining to Akako wanting to help Kaito on heists (to get closer to him) and Kaito insisting she’s only getting in the way, and Kaito yells something along the lines of “If you want to get close to me, just spend time with me like a normal person!” and shes like ??? and kaito is like “D. Do you even know how to do that.” and now kaito is like fuck i feel bad for her actually maybe i should invite her to hang out after school or something.
Cue Akako making her first real friend and being like oh shit this is really nice actually.
Akako does eventually start helping behind the scenes on heists.
and uhh thats about all ive got for now, but theres my akako thoughts!!
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2, 7, 30
Thanks anon!!!
2. build a starting lineup:
a) based on looks
So 5 hot hockey people so forwards, Madison packer, uhh svech and mat Barzel , d-men Cale makar and Roman Josi and for goalie I’ll go with Tristan jarry
b) for comedic effect
This is easier so brad Marchand, Matthew tckuuchkukuk, and Travis koneccnony.  for Defence pairing I’m going with Zdeno chara and Gritty and my goalie is dobby
c) of players under 6 ft tall
Again it’s Alex debrincat, Sidney Crosby and brad Marchand, on d is Torey krug and Cam Atkinson ans my goalie is juuse saros
d) with players of different nationalities
Mitch marner, Phil Kessel, and Leon drisatale. D is Esa Lindell and Erik karlsson and my goalie is Igor shestyorkin
7. why is your favourite player your favourite player?
So my favorite player is Victoria Hanson because 1 she’s a goalie and 2 she’s from my favorite team and 3 she was the first player I drew she’s also cool
30. what’s your favourite hockey tradition?
100% out door rinks and games
Send me a hockey ask!
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Pass the happy
I got tagged so why the fuck not. Tag the last ten people in your notification and 5 things that make you happy. Uhh there’s a lot of things that make me happy
(1) hanging out with friends, which isn’t often I mostly go out to places with my cousins and since I finally got my license she’s using me for that. (2) every wonderful person on this wonderful website and in irl who listens to my random incoherent babbles and shit posts and asks (3) my parents dog and cat even though the cat hates me and everyone (4) free days where I can relax (5) a plethora of movies, bands/singers and tvshows
Igor tagged by @ongaku-ato-kakikomi who will be the first on the list then here are the 9 lovely others
@voltage-vixen @united-fandoms-in-one-home @archieimagines @lotsoffandomimagines @eleventhdoctorsangel @cactiem @imsupposedtobedoingcollege @multifandom-ramblings and finally @myriadimagines
Do what you please with this.
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Victor and Adam: NaNoWriMo Day 12
‘Oh. Okay.’
Victor
The drive to his parents was a long one so Victor had booked a hotel somewhere halfway along the journey. That way they could leave a day early and stay the night before finishing the journey the next day, instead of having to leave at three in the morning so as to not arrive in the evening. They would then spend the night there before driving back home the next day. It had been a while since Victor had driven himself anywhere other than into town himself but he soon got the hang of things. Adam sat in the back the passenger seat in front of him pushed forward as far as it would go. He’d packed that green book and another poetry book he’d found in the library which he was now reading. He’d also brought his phone which he was using to listen to music. Victor could swear he could just make out a Patsy Cline song. The journey was a silent one and Victor had all but forgotten he wasn’t alone until Adam suddenly spoke and pointed out it was nearly half past two and they still hadn’t eaten. After a quick stop at a restaurant, there was no way he was going near a service station, and a trip to the mini supermarket across the road from Adam they set off again. Adam who had bought a couple of science magazines and some chocolate mints busied himself with more reading while Victor decided he might as well turn on the radio. At some point Adam spoke again.
‘I got two bottles of water in case you wanted some.’ He said holding out one of the bottles.
‘I’m fine.’ Victor dismissed him with a wave of his hand.
‘Okay. Well I’ll leave it here so you can help yourself when you need it.’ He said as he put the bottle into one of the cup holders between the driver and passenger seat. For a moment Victor wasn’t sure if he should say anything. But by the time he’d thought of something to say Adam had already slipped his headphones back on.
***
They got to the hotel a little later than planned. After checking into their rooms, Victor had decided to pay for Adam to have his own room as he didn’t feel like sharing his, Victor told Adam to order whatever he wanted from room service he was going to bed. Adam just said goodnight and disappeared into his room. It was only when he set it down did Victor realise he was holding the bottle of water Adam had given him.
***
After a quick breakfast of tea and buttered toast for Victor and a not quite so quick breakfast of honey and cinnamon pancakes and orange juice for Adam they paid their bill and left to finish their journey. Victor had made sure to have Igor pack some of Adam’s best informal clothes, though he didn’t have many options. He was wearing a light weight sky blue jumper and light grey jeans his trainers did sort of ruin the look but his only other pair of shoes were his school shoes which Igor was adamantly against the idea of him wearing them on a picnic. Victor had also insisted he get his hair cut before they left. Adam was reluctant to go to a salon but fortunately his friend Chelsea’s older sister was a hairdresser and was perfectly happy to come up to the castle and do it there. So now Adam’s hair which had grown just past his shoulders was now cut so you could see the back of his neck. His fringe also no longer resembled that of an old English sheepdog. Victor himself was dressed as he usually did when visiting his parents a grey shirt with brown chinos and a brown pair of shoes. When they arrived at the Frankenstein estate he saw that most guests had already arrived.
‘Victor you made it!’ he saw someone rushing to great him.
‘Hello Justine.’ He greeted his little sister with a wave. Justine was one of the Frankenstein’s two adopted daughters and certainly the more spirited of the two. Her eyes widened as she saw Adam climb out of the car.
‘Oh is this…’ she didn’t seem sure how to finish the sentence.
‘I’m Adam.’ Adam introduced himself holding out his hand. Wearily Justine took it.
‘Nice to meet you.’ She said looking him up and down. It wasn’t something you could do subtly as you had to tilt your head to get a look at his face but Adam seemed unfazed.
‘I like your hair.’ This brought a smile to Justine’s face. She had dyed the ends of her white blonde hair bright pink and was very proud of it. ‘My friend wants to dye ver hair like that but ver foster mum won’t let ver.’
‘Oh that’s a pity. Still they won’t be living there forever.’ She then turned back to Victor. ‘Come on everyone’s ready so start eating, I was sent to see if you had arrived yet.’ Victor locked up the car before making his way down the side of the house with Adam close behind carrying his bag.
‘Victor darling. How lovely to see you.’ His mother cried rushing over and giving him a kiss on the cheek.
‘Hello mother.’ He said giving her a couple of pats on the back. He was very aware of everyone staring in his direction. No doubt at Adam. Adam was looking at his feet and clutching his bag so tightly his knuckles were white.
‘Adam aren’t you going to say hi?’ Victor asked. He didn’t want his parents thinking he hadn’t taught Adam any manners.
‘Hello. Adam said holding out his hand.’
‘Hello.’ Victor’s mother said. Though she didn’t take his hand.’ Eventually Adam let his hand drop seeming unsure what to do with himself.
‘Where’s father?’ Victor asked. ‘I want to give him his present before everyone starts eating.’
‘He’s over by the buffet table.’ His mother replied gesturing to a long table that had been set up the other end of the picnic blankets and chairs which had been spread out. ‘Oh and let me take that for you.’ She added taking the bowl of salad Igor had made for them to bring. Victor thanked her before heading in the direction she had gestured. He found his father sat in one of the chairs that usually sat in the conservatory. He was talking to Victor’s youngest sibling William who kept pointing at Adam.
‘Yes I know but you mustn’t point.’ He heard his father scold. William was eight, a late and unplanned addition to the family, and had a habit of asking a seemingly never-ending stream of questions. Though while many parents would be annoyed by his curious nature the Frankenstein’s encouraged it at every chance they got.
‘Hello father. Happy birthday.’ Victor said as he handed him his present. His father opened it and seemed delighted by the book and whiskey.
‘Well that’s my weekend sorted,’ he laughed. He looked up at Adam. ‘Oh but where are my manners? You must be Adam.’ Adam nodded.
‘Uhh Happy Birthday. I’ve got something for you too.’ He reached into his bag and pulled out what looked to Victor liked a mass of wrapping paper and Sellotape. ‘I tried to wrap it myself. I’m not very good at it.’
‘Oh not to worry.’ Victor’s father laughed. ‘Practice makes perfect.’ He pulled of the wrapping to reveal what from the back looked like a picture frame. ‘Oh this is good? Where did you find this?’
‘I drew it.’ Adam replied looking very pleased with himself.
‘You drew it? Well it’s very good. And you’ve labelled everything as well.’ Curious now Victor leaned forward to get a good look. In the frame was a drawing of a Plymouth Fury from the side that had been cut down the middle. There was also a cross section drawing from the front and of the engine. Each mechanical part was carefully labelled. He turned to look at Adam.
‘Is this why you haven’t been leaving your room?’ he asked.
‘One of them. The research took a long time. Most of the information I could find was on this old movie.’
‘Well thank you very much.’ Victors father said. ‘Oh Lizzie dear could you take these and put them with the rest of my presents? Thank you.’ He handed the presents to Victors other adopted sister. ‘Now why don’t you sit down. There quickly before Justine nicks the only other chair.’ Victor sat in one of the remaining chairs. ‘Oh and please sit down Adam. Though I’m afraid if you want a chair yourself you’ll have to see if there are any more spare. This one’s reserved for my wife.’ Adam assured him that would be fine and sat himself down on the corner of the picnic blanket. William was staring at him wide eyed and for once speechless.
‘William dear, you can go and get your food now.’ Their mother said walking over to them Justine close behind. ‘I’m letting the children grab their food first then having everyone go up one blanket at a time.’ She explained. ‘We’ll be next.’
‘Wait so does Adam count as a child?’ Justine asked. ‘I mean he’s… Wait how old are you?’
‘Physically I’m sixteen. But I’ve only been alive for two years.’
‘Yeah so if we’re counting anyone up to eighteen as a child Adam should go up with the rest.’ Adam shook his head.
‘I can wait.’
‘Really? Well I’m eighteen so I’m technically still a child.’ With that she left.
‘She wasn’t a child yesterday when she got that piercing behind my back.’ Their mother grumbled. Once everyone had their food they settled down and began eating. Victors mother kept wearily eyeing Adam and insisted William sit beside her. Adam sat between Justine and Victor and seemed to hunch up more and more as time went on under her gaze. He picked his food apart before even starting to eat any of it, something Victor had noticed was a nervous habit.
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Meet the Lovesick
Another chapter for the college AU by @drawbauchery!
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“Y’know, I bet we look like the poster from that movie.”, mumbled Amy into her cup of coffee, speaking to Laplace at her side as they sized up the apartment building.
It was a dreary morning. The fog on the ground mixed with the cloud-covered sky to canvas the street in grey. Laplace normally would still be in her house at this time, Amy would be in bed, but Holly threatened an inspection on them if they didn’t do this for her. Her secretary had been gone for the last few days, she wouldn’t even pick up the phone. Now it was up to them to somehow drag her to work before the day began. Luckily, one window in the building, the third storey of a total of four, was lit, the one which Laplace recalled belonged to her.
“Which movie was that?”, asked Laplace, before having a quick shiver inside her coat.
Amy took another look around, the dim light of the Sun just about to poke over the horizon, the dense clouds of fog quick to obscure both ends of the quiet, nearly-empty city street, “It’s the one with the little girl, and she’s possessed, and the guy goes ‘The Power of Christ compels you!’”, she explained, putting on an accent.
Laplace looked confused for a moment, but then snickered, “Oh yeah! The man’s standing standing outside the building and it’s all foggy!”, she answered, “I get you. Though I hope we don’t find her latched onto the ceiling, or levitating over the bed.”
They approached the entrance, Laplace checking the house numbers ‘Room 5 - Aki, M.’ They climbed the steps, reaching the third floor, a corridor with two doors facing each other. One of the doors was slightly open, a wedge of light cast on the corridor floor. Laplace and Amy approached it, seeing the ‘5’ sign stuck on it.
Amy looked concerned, “Should we go on? I can’t believe I’m saying this, but...is she alright?”
Laplace furrowed her brow, and raised her hand to the door, ready to gently knock on it.
“Hey, bitch!”, Laplace shouted into the room.
No reply.
“Hmmm. There might be something wrong. Come on.”, Laplace pushed the door open, taking a few slow steps into the apartment.
The lights were on, and Laplace could see that no chores had been done for the best part of a week. The sink was packed with plates and takeaway packets, there was a stench suggesting they had been there for at least a few days, and most worryingly of all, the coffee table had more than a few empty beer cans and wine bottles.
“Huh. You’d think she’d keep her place looking nice.”, whispered Amy. She thought it looked alright when you saw past the garbage, a few paintings, Laplace would’ve told her they were ‘impressionist’, some nice-looking furniture, some candles, a tray for incense sticks.
“Her ‘game’, I believe, usually is to get into the beds of others, though I bet it’s another thing for her to tally. ‘Your Place/My Place Ratios’ seem to be the sort of thing her sort would--” Laplace tried to whisper back, her bubbling anger forcing her to bite her lip. She heard a hum from what seemed to be the bathroom, and indeed the wedge of light from the nearly-closed door betrayed that it was likely occupied.
“Mari?”, Amy asked as she slowly pushed the door open.
The sight she saw, she didn’t know whether to call the hospital or burst out laughing.
Mari lay prone on the floor of the tile bathroom floor, snoozing quietly. Laplace gagged at the smell, reeking from the toilet, both women fairly certain of what it was. Amy noticed the reaction from Laplace, and diligently tiptoed across the bathroom to flush the toilet, though not without taking the chance to look in.
She had to hand it to Mari, her aim was top-notch.
“Here, I’ll get the shoulders, you get the feet.”, Laplace managed to speak past the gag reflex.
Amy looked down at Mari, then at Laplace, “Why? Where we putting her?”
Laplace stared silently at Amy, expressionless, then made a side glance to the shower bath, glowing with nasty intent. Amy only needed a moment to realise this, and shared delight with the idea.
Crossing around Mari like investigators at a murder scene, Amy first gently setting down her coffee cup, the two women gently, or not so gently, grabbed hold of her ends. “Alright, Mari.”, Laplace cooed, “Say ‘hello’ to a bright new day.”
Flipping her around and suspending her in the air, Mari grumbled and feebly struggled in their hands, nodding her her head at irritation of the light being the most she could do. With only a little effort, they were able to lower her into the bath, the showerhead aimed directly down at her face.
Laplace took delight in grabbing hold of the lever. She looked to Amy, “Ve ‘ave charge, Igor?”
Amy grinned and nodded, “Yeth, mathter!”
Mari’s eyelids had just about broke open when Laplace slammed the lever down, soaking her in freezing water.
“AHHHHHHH!”, screamed Mari, juttering up, flailing her arms to catch the stream of water. Laplace turned off the lever just as her hair soaked up some water and began to run it out down her face.
“Morning!”, greeted Amy, cheerily, as Mari focused on wiping her face dry.
She only slightly feared for her life as Mari glared at her with an anger that seemed capable of boiling off the water until she was bone dry. “What are you doing here?!”
Laplace crossed her arms. “Holly sent us. Why have you not been at work?”
Mari turned the focus of scorn to Laplace, but it didn’t last long. She seemed to remember something, and then slowly folded into herself, sliding back into the tub. “I...I, uhh...”
Laplace sighed, turned to the toilet and set down the lid, taking a seat on top, “Tell me about her.”
That irritated Mari enough to get her sitting up again, but a blush once more froze her, “I--I don’t know what you’re talking about!”
Laplace slowly nodded her head, up and down, “‘I don’t know what you’re talking about.’ Hear that, Amy? She doesn’t know what I’m talking about.”
Amy’s grin was ear-to-ear, “Cut her some slack, Lap, she’s new to this.”
Mari gritted her clear, clearly of the opinion she would rather be anywhere else. “I am not ‘new’ to anything! And I would be delighted if you two would get out of my--”
“Oh!”, Laplace called out, and started wagging her fingers to a simple beat. Looking to Amy like a children’s TV presenter, she said in a singsong voice “If. You. Will. Take into consideration. Think past your inebriation. You’ll find it better than fornication, it’s love! Love! Love!”
Amy giggled, only slightly worried about Laplace being within punching distance. “You’re torturing her. Here, Romeo, wake yourself up.”, holding out her cup for Mari to take. Mari had the face of a killer, but she accepted the coffee, instantly emptying it with a large gulp.
Laplace sat up straight, “I suppose this isn’t the sort of experience you learn about in ‘The Player’s Guide to Ukrainian Chicks Vol. 3’, is it? The rush of adrenalin in your veins? The fire inside your heart? The crushing feeling that you couldn’t possibly be in her league? What was her name again, Amy?”
Amy playfully rubbed her chin, “‘Paz Toledo’, wasn’t it? I’m surprised, Mari, I didn’t think you’d ever settle down with a mujer hermosa.”
“Shut up, shut up! The both of you!”, Mari shouted, sliding back down into the bath, covering her face. After a moment, she deposited her arms back down to her sides, looking defeated. “‘Paz’, huh? I couldn’t even find that out before running away like a child. I couldn’t even ask her her name.”
Laplace nodded, “Yep. And she’s a new member of staff, so it’s pretty much guaranteed you will see her again. I don’t know if you find that to be a good thing or not.” Laplace was silent for a moment. “So you really think you love her, don’t you?”
Mari stared up at the bathroom light, the harshness somewhat justifying her ugly glare. “I don’t love anyone. I don’t even love myself, I admire myself. Love is an idiotic idea.”
“And Denial is a river in Egypt.”, Laplace countered. “Really, what are you going to do about it? You’ve been stuck in here for a few days, you must’ve thought about how you’re going to ‘win’ her. What does your ‘experience’ tell you to do? Buy her a drink? Tell her a stupid oneliner? Grope her and pester her until she gives in?
Mari looked away, “...no...I...I couldn’t. She...”, she thought carefully, “She doesn’t deserve that.”
For a moment, Laplace wasn’t sure what to say. She couldn't honestly say she expected Mari to answer her. “...well...if you...want it, if you’re going to think of her as something more than a notch in a tally, then I think we...”, she looked to Amy before she could run away, “We...can help you make a good, ahh, ‘second’ impression.”
Laplace and Amy intently listened in for a reply, at last hearing a meek, mumbling, exhausted, “...alright...”
Laplace smiled, and stood up from the toilet. “Well, here’s the first lesson to a committed relationship.”, she grabbed the shower lever again. “Take regular showers.”
Mari’s eyes widened, holding up her arms to shield her face, “Wait, n--!”
The lever was pulled down.
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jack,jun,johan,judai
ohh, four at once? well, let’s see…
Jack
Why I like them/why I don’t
I like assholish blondes. His character arc is facinating! Give me alll this drama and character development and dramatic love confessions! Also, he’s really extra and I love this.
What I like about their appearance
Uhh. I never actually thought about this. He’s… not particulary aestetically appealing to me. Which is really weird because I usually like blondes :D I can tell that he is attractive, but appearence-wise he doesn’t seem to be my type.
Do I prefer their dub names or original names?
P. sure his name wasn’t changed.
OTP
Kingcrabshipping.
NOTP
I almost never have those. I’m gonna ignore this question with other character ‘cause answer will the same lol.
OT3
Jack x Yusei x Aki, but I mostly ship them separately… oh wait! I forgot kizunashipping!
Favourite card they use
Scar-Red Nova Dragon.
Favourite moment they were in
Either that scene on the roof with Carly or his duel duel against Scar-Red Nova. Actualy, the entire mini-arc about Scar-red Nova was awesome.
Least favourite moment
Almost everything he did in the final three episodes. I just… what the hell even was this ending? The last few scenes where the only good part about it.
Would I fuck, marry or kill them
Fuck. I wouldn’t handle marrying him :D
Jun
Why I like them/why I don’t
What do you mean “why”, he’s perfect. I find a lot of his struggles relatable, I like his character development and also I like assholes.
What I like about their appearance
He’s… pretty. Idk.
Do I prefer their dub names or original names?
Original.
OTP
GX rivalshipping.
OT3
Choiceshipping.
Favourite card they use
Hmmm… I don’t think I have one.
Favourite moment they were in
Him defeating his brother with 0atck monsters!
Least favourite moment
ALL THE MOMENTS WHERE MY BOY IS PRESENT ARE PERFECT SHUT UP. …exept maybe his duel with Asuka at the end of s1.
Would I fuck, marry or kill them
Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm… marry.
Johan
Why I like them/why I don’t
He’s such a sweetheart?? Like, he’s so nice and sweet and cute and kind?? Such a good boy.
What I like about their appearance
He’s so… soft. It’s kinda unusual for Yugioh with all it’s spiky hair and stuff.
Do I prefer their dub names or original names?
Original. Tbh “Jesse” is just… weird.
OTP
Spiritshipping.
OT3
Whatever Johan x Judai x Yubel is called.
Favourite card they use
Ruby!
Favourite moment they were in
Their meeting with Judai in s4!
Least favourite moment
HIM SACRIFACING HIMSELF. Johan, no!:(
Would I fuck, marry or kill them
Marry.
Judai
Why I like them/why I don’t
As you could’ve noticed I’m a slut for quality character development, and Judai’s is one of them. And like… his personality is facinating? And the final, while a little sad, was perfect? Also he’s adorable.
What I like about their appearance
*sweating* Uh… his… smile? If I don’t care about character’s appearence when I watch the show, I don’t care after I finish it either :D If you asked about Aki, I’d probably write a lot, because she’s p r e t t y, but with most of other characters I don’t care.
Do I prefer their dub names or original names?
Original.
OTP
GX rivalshipping.
OT3
Nooo there’s too many options ;_; Choiceshipping, I guess?
Favourite card they use
Yubel.
Favourite moment they were in
Season 4. Just… the entire season. It was great.
Least favourite moment
Hmm… when he igores and then ditches his friends in his search after Johan. That was a major dick move.
Would I fuck, marry or kill them
Marry.
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Hey, so I don't know if this was explained in an older post or something, but why were the 2P's in the ending specifically those 3? Where are the other 2P's, and why weren't they there instead? What's special about Iggy, Loup, and Igor?
(adm: Aah yes, about that... I’m just gonna write my thinking process last year, when I had little less than a month to finish the game:
“Okay okay uhh..., so,...... so I have to finish this right?? ???? I just got to the part where Tomoyoshi left off. Okay. I can do this. Alright. It’s all good. Okay so I can just follow this ending I wrote..... oh no but........ oh but...... um... um... u OH THE 2PS WERE A THING RIGHT?!!!!! OKay so the 2ps were a thing. Great. What’s next?? Okay I uh *opens Game Character Hub* I’m just gonna uuhhhh get this England sprite and edit him and,,, his 2P was ??? called Oliver right???? Oh but idk who owns his design..... I should make a new one!!!! Oh but if I make him too different people aren’t going to recognize him. Okay. So. Uh. Pink and blue. Ok make him pink and blue, pink and blue and you’re cool Cookie just do it. There’s this cape option, perfect let’s give him a cape. ALright so now I have England.... what should I call him????? England... Iggy... Iggy? Alright Iggy.
Okay so now I have Iggy, perfect. He’s gonna do this shit and- oh, but, alone?? No no, he needs company. Okay who’re the ones he hates the most? Russia is one!! Okay Russia you’re in. Imma just edit his sprite and.... oh yeah France too!! Alright France you’re in!!!! I have a trio! tHIS IS GOOD ENOUGH I CAN DO THIS”
...And then I made my way towards an ending that made sense. XD hope this was a good enough explanation, bc that’s legit what happened lmao)
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Just a thing
SSO OC Asks
1. What is their home stable in-game? Why?
Mistfall, story wise it’s because the baroness (my character works for her) wanted to start up a vineyard in mistfall and sent my character to manage the day to day operations, but mostly it’s just because I like mistfall.
2. Where do they actually live in Jorvik?
They bought a farmhouse in mistfall after selling their place in silverglade
3. Who is their favorite NPC? (Obvs they wouldn’t be for our characters, but you know)
There are several, Rania, Avalon, Evergray, Ydris, the list goes on.
4. Who is their Soul Steed? What breed are they? Do they have any markings or look different in some way from the in-game appearance you could give them?
For now it’s the black Clydesdale, until they do Percherons. If they ever get around to Percherons its a Black mare with a small white blaze (My irl soulhorse) Mockingbird.
5. What is their favorite location? (Ex, Hollow Woods, Greendale, Silverglade Manor Library) Why?
Wooded areas in general, so mistfall and valedale mostly
6. Who’s their favorite horse? Why?
Assuming you mean npc horse it’s Meteor.
7. What are their powers? Are they stronger with one Circle over any of the others?
She’s not stronger in any circles, but her favorite is lightning. She gets, essentially, less powerful versions of the four soulriders powers. She heals faster and medicines she makes heal better but she can’t just heal with her hands, she gets premonitions rather then full visions, she can open portals in the right places and at the right times but it’s spotty at best, and finally she can electrify items if she’s holding them but she can’t shoot lightning from her hands.
8. What’s their usual style? Any favorite tack sets or color themes for them?
Western and dark brown/black for color
9. Thoughts about Jorvik City? How do they feel about Rania’s petition for a horse-friendly Jorvik City?
It’s big and noisy and crowded, she’s got anxiety so she hates going there. She thinks it may not be the best idea, considering all the cars and loud noises.
10. Thoughts about Justin? (I’m sorry, I’m curious, he shows up so much)
She likes him well enough, she feels bad about the part she played in his disappearance and turn to darkness. All she wants is to make it better but she doesn’t know how.
11. How do they feel about the magical horse race at the circus? Did they enjoy being a horse?
She likes it, but she’d rather be turned into a Hawk or a Lion
12. Do they trust the Druids? Or how do they feel about them?
She trusts specific druids, but not the organisation as a whole. She also thinks they take to long to decide things and that they are too cautious. Caution won’t win a war against the brazen.
13. Least favorite NPC?
Not including bad guys, uhh the bobcat girls probably?
14. How do they make their money?
She works for the Baroness makes wine, grows grapes. She gets a monthly paycheck for her work managing the Mistfall winery. She’s also looking to buy half the mistfall winery and become co-owner, since the Baroness doesn’t get down to the mistfall winery much it would work out much better that way.
15. How many horses do they own?
Quite a few, I’m not going to count.
16. How many pets do they have? What kind? What are their names?
None if you don’t include the horses.
17. How do they feel about the Soul Riders? Do they trust them? Feel like an outsider? Are they closer to some over the others?
She trusts the Souls Riders, loves them really. She’s finally starting to feel like she’s one of them. She’s pretty close with all of them considering she saved two of them, and has known Alex for a while now.
18. Do they believe something mystical, magical, or otherwise strange really exists in Dino Valley? How did they feel about the leaving of the Kallter and the roar/scream/screech in the Valley?
Yes, but she’s not sure what. That freeze ain’t natural. She’s really worried about the Kallter just leaving like that, but she’s got other stuff on her plate at the moment.
19. Thoughts about Jorvik Wild Horses?
She thinks they’re really cool, she feels like they and her are similar. Not of this world but not of Pandora either, caught in-between.
20. Do you think they are a Wild Whisperer? Or are they just bonded with their Soul Steed?
Wild Whisperer of course, since she’s good with the wild things, especially if those things have a learned distrust of humans.
21. What’s their favorite Jorvegian holiday or celebration?
The more Pagan/Nordic themed ones.
22. What do they think or feel about Pandoria? Have they or do they visit outside of the quests (using the rifts)? If they have or still do, why?
It’s neat cause it’s like somehow the opposite of earth. Like being in the ocean but with air instead of water. She doesn’t visit unless she has too cause it wouldn’t make sense story wise, but she’d love to visit more. She’s real curious about what the ocean life would be like. Maybe there would be trees and ferns and flowers in it, since the coral and sea animals are above the water.
23. How has their visit(s) to Pandoria affected them? Do they have scars? Has it affected any of their life views?
At first it doesn’t appear like they have, but she’s started to notice a slight glow coming from her old scars.
24. Would they ever consider working for Dark Core or believing their side?
No. Even if Dark Core was somehow trying to do something good she still hates what they’ve done to the earth and innocent people.
25. What or who is Garnok to them? A dark presence? A squid-like monster? A child with a ridiculously complicated jumping course (fuckin @’s Lizzy)?
Something unknowable. She wonders if it really cares about dark core, or if dark core really even knows what Garnok is themselves.
26. Do they ever go to the Disco? If they don’t, would they ever consider going? What would it take to make them go?
No, too many people, too loud.
27. Disco or Moorland Beach party?
Neither.
28. Are they interested in helping with archaeology or fishing?
Both, she enjoys both greatly because they don’t require too much contact with people. (I hate both because both suck at this very moment, make it fun sso!)
29. How do they feel about Igor, the waiter/manager of the Dino Valley cafe, and whom seemed interested in your horse for… “culinary reasons?”
She doesn’t trust him one bit. And he can stay far away from her horses. He can order her wine though, thats fine.
30. Do they like the perpetual winter of Dino Valley or the perpetual autumn/fall of Goldenhills Valley, or is it strange to them? Do they prefer one over the other, or neither?
She has mixed feelings about it. It’s not natural. But she enjoys visiting both when she feels like being in that season.
💋 how many partners do you have? One for now.
💘 do you feel like you chose to be polyamorous or do you feel like it’s who you are? I think it’s currently who I am, but it’s not like I’ve always known.
❤️ how many metamours (partners’ partners) do you have? None.
💔 what was the worst thing someone has said/done when they found out you were polyamorous? Nothing yet, I’ve only told two people.
💖 what was your best moment with each of your partners? My favorite moments are when we’re curled up on the bed just being silly. Playing games or laughing or talking.
💗 do you prefer to date people who are dating each other or not? Dating each other. I want a big happy poly puppy pile.
💙 what’s your best memory with a metamour? N/a
💚 how did you come to be in a polyamorous relationship/ identify as polyamorous? It started when I was reading L.K. Hamilton's Anita Blake series. It opened my eyes to a lot of stuff when I was younger, it’s how I realized I was Bi and Poly.
💛 what’s your favorite polyam pun? My memory is shit so, don’t got one.
🌻 does your polycule have any inside jokes? Don’t PUSH me and some others.
💜 do you think of polyamory as a sexuality? Kinda, yea.
❦ what was your worst polyam break up? Not had one yet thankfully.
💝 what’s your gender? Female
💞 what’s your sexuality? Bi
💟 do you think being polyam makes you LGBT? Only if the poly group is LGBT+ I guess?
❣️ who’s the most stylish person in your polycule? No one, yet.
💌 how do your partners tell you they love you? By saying I love you generally but also in lots of small and big ways.
💍 have you ever had or do you ever want a wedding or commitment ceremony? Maybe, I’m on the fence about it really.
💐 what’s something you like about each of your metamours? Still don’t have any.
🌸 are you looking for more partners right now? Yes, I’m looking for a female (I want a girlfriend)
🌹 what’s your ideal number of partners? 4, two guys, two girls so it’s nice and even. But maybe I'd like more then that, idk.
🌺 would you ever want to live with both your partner and your metamour? Yes!
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Rule The World with Me-
Ivar the Boneless × Reader
Chapter Thirty-Five is here...
Chapter Thirty-Six: Day One Before Battle
Word Count 1.3k
Warnings: smut, cuss words
_____________________________________
You toss and turn all night long. Your thoughts would not allow you to rest, would not allow you to sleep. Ivar couldn't either, he just held you close and played with your red hair until you finally just passed out from exhaustion. When you awake, Ivar is holding Baldur in his arms and smiling.
"Good morning boys."
Ivar "Morning kitten. Baldur was fussing so I grabbed him."
"Does he need to eat?"
Ivar "No, I don't think so. I think he just wanted affection."
"Mmkay." You roll completely over and wrap your arms around your husband's bicep. You and Ivar just take in this wonderful moment where it is just you two with your beautiful child. You notice how his face lights up when his father makes cooing noises. How big his beautiful blue-green eyes are and how he has your smile. Everything about your son is perfect to you and Ivar. He is truly your blessing.
Ivar "I'm going to put him down, he is sleepy now."
"Time for your nap already?"
Ivar "mhm. Your father needs to give your mother attention too." You smile but your body immediately gets warm. The thought of what he might be talking about makes you ache for the need of affection. After he puts Baldur down for his nap in his bassinet, Hvitserk comes into the room.
Hvitserk "Hey, uhh sorry but...can I talk to you Ivar."
Ivar "Can it wait, Y/n and I wer-"
Hvitserk "No. I am sorry but it can't wait."
"Go ahead. See what he wants, I'll be here when you come back." He pecks your lips and then gets out of bed.
…
Ivar "What is it?"
Hvitserk "A vision Ivar."
Ivar "Good or bad?"
Hvitserk "Very good, brother. Very good."
Ivar "Okay so why couldn't the news wait huh?"
Hvitserk "Because not all of it is good."
Ivar "Care to elaborate?"
Hvitserk "We kill her Ivar. We kill Lagertha! But she wounds Y/n."
Ivar "How bad is the wound."
Hvitserk "Pretty bad. The vision didn't show if she lives after it or not."
Ivar "Where is the wound?"
Hvitserk "Her side. I can see her holding her right side in the vision. Then I look over at Messiah gnawing at Lagertha's throat while you hold her down."
Ivar "And then?"
Hvitserk "It ends."
Ivar "So what does all of that mean?"
Hvitserk "We can't let her wound Y/n. If she doesn't, then everything should be fine and end in our favor."
Ivar takes a deep breath and looks down at the floor. The vision could have been worse but wounds can get infected or you can die from the severity of the cut. He just has to make sure that you don't get hurt during this battle.
Ivar "Very well. Thank you for telling me, Hvitserk."
Hvitserk "I won't let her get wounded, Ivar. I just wanted to tell you because it involves your wife."
Ivar "I know. Are you sure that there is nothing else that you need to tell me."
Hvitserk "No. Go ahead and join your wife. I'll spend some time with Ubbe and Torvi while you two have your fun." Ivar nods and chuckles while opening up the door to your chambers.
"What did he want?"
Ivar "Don't worry about it, kitten."
"Just tell me..please." Ivar crutches his way over to you and sits down.
Ivar "He had a vision. It was a very good vision because we won Y/n! We won the battle."
"That is wonderful news!" But his face drops right after he told you that you all won. "Ivar?"
Ivar "You get wounded."
"How bad?"
Ivar "H-He doesn't know. He just sees you holding your right side and you are bleeding. He doesn't know anything else."
"Well not knowing could be a good thing. If I would have died, surely Hvitserk would have seen that in his vision."
Ivar "Perhaps you are right but it still makes me very uneasy."
"Me too but I am not changing my mind. I want to fight by my brother's side and by my husband's side."
Ivar "Y/n-"
"Ivar. Have faith in me, please. I am strong, you know that. I will come home to you, my love."
Ivar "Alright, my sweet."
"Can we enjoy the rest of our day, my king?" You know that he loves hearing you call him that. It is one of his weaknesses that will always make him want you even more.
Ivar "Oh we definitely will, kitten." He grabs your face and pulls your lips to his and aggressively kisses you. You moan at how hard yet gentle he is with you. You love the way he makes you feel. "You know what to do now, princess. Be a good girl for your king." You help him undress you and lay on your back. As soon he is undressed, he crawls on top of you and hovers his big body over you. You pull his face to yours and kiss him deeply. You make him moan by your kisses. He trails his hands all over her body: your face, your neck, your breasts and then he traces your wet core and bites down on your bottom lip.
Ivar "Gods I love how wet I make you."
"Please don't tease."
Ivar "I will tease you if you don't beg for me."
"Please Ivar."
Ivar "Please what? Tell your king what you want."
"Your cock."
Ivar "Already?!"
"Yes, please. I can't wait any longer. I've wanted this all night long but I didn't think that you would be in the mood."
Ivar "Oh kitten, I am always in the mood. I will always give you what you want." He kisses you while he aligns his cock up to you. He thrusts into you deeply, not allowing you to adjust. You dig your nails into his shoulder blades earning a loud moan from him.
"Fuck, you feel so good!"
Ivar "That is right, kitten. Scream it. Scream how good I make you feel."
"Yes! Yes please don't stop!" You almost forget that your child is in the room because somehow he still hasn't woken up. He uses his fingers to massage your clit while he thrusts deeply.
Ivar "Oh there you go, baby. I can feel you tightening, give it to me baby. Cum for your king."
"Yes yes yes! Please don't stop!"
He continues with his movements and you cum at the same time. Breathless, he falls off of you and you rest your head on his chest. Your legs are still shaking minutes after you came, that is how hard it hit you.
Ivar "How did Baldur not wake up?"
"I don't know but I am glad that we could finish before he did."
Ivar "Oh we would have finished regardless, kitten." You kiss his chest before falling asleep for a half hour.
_____________________________________
You and Ivar walk out and Hvitserk is petting Messiah while eating along with Ubbe, Torvi and Igor.
"That smells good, what is it?"
Hvitserk "Deer. We saved you both plenty."
"Thank you!"
Ivar "Ubbe, any news?"
Hvitserk "Yes I did. I am gathering that you told Y/n?"
Ubbe "No. I feel like no news is good news."
Ivar."Possibly. Did you tell him your vision, brother?"
"He did."
Ubbe "And I am betting that you are still fighting."
"I am. I want to make my son proud of me Ubbe. I don't want him to think that I back down from every battle."
Torvi "I understand how you feel because I am the same way with my children."
"Thank you, Torvi."
You all feasted and talked about what we will all be doing after the battle. Hvitserk is going to stay in Kattegat as well as Ubbe and Torvi. You and Ivar are going to come back to Novgorod and raise Baldur to be a strong viking. Hvitserk will come visit Baldur every month so that he doesn't miss his godson growing up, which warms your heart. You look forward to your future with your entire family. You have gained the world when the gods gave you Ivar, and now you have to fight for it all over again. But this will be the last time.
_____________________________________
(The next chapter will be the chapter before the battle. What would you like to read next? Let me know so I can start to write♡)
@hvitserkmarcosource @youbloodymadgenius @ivarthebloodyking @ivarsgoddess
#alex hogh andersen#alex hogh andersen smut#ivar the boneless#ivar the god#ivar lothbrok#hvitserk lothbrok#hvitserk#ubbe lothbrok#rule the world with me#torvi vikings#marco ilsø#vikings
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Magic Story Abridged: Limited Time Offer
(Episode 7; Battle for Zendikar Episode 1; Original Stories HERE and HERE )
When Gideon Jura wields his swift sural
All those who chose to oppose his sural fall
When there’s crime to thwart or a war to fight
You can count on the man who is mono-white
When Gideon Jura wields his swift sural.
Art by Dan Scott
PRESENT DAY
ZENDIKAR
(We open on Kytheon Iora, now a man, fighting a number of Eldrazi spawn. In the background, a group of Kor, Humans, Elves, and Goblins watch patiently.)
Munda, a large, muscular Kor: (Quietly, to the others in his group) ...Here we see a wild Gideon Jura, latin name Kytheon Iora, taking down its prey. Though the beasts are larger and more powerful than he, his glowing golden aura protects him from all known forms of attack. His Sural, also known as an Urumi or Whip-Blade, can cut through the flesh of even the toughest of Eldrazi, though it may take many such blows to cause one to fall. Though Eldrazi meat is inedible, this kill with give the Gideon great renown. If the hunt is successful, he will not have difficulty finding a mate this season.
Kytheon, now going by Gideon full time: (Calling over) I know you’re there, Munda! Are you going to lend a hand or not?
Munda: You’re doing fine, bro! They can’t even scratch you!
Gideon: I’d still like to finish up sometime today!
Munda: Fine, fine! Everyone, attack!
(Munda and his party help Gideon dispatch the Eldrazi.)
Gideon: Really wished you’d shown up earlier. I’ve been fighting those things for hours. Literally hours.
Munda: Sorry, bro, but we just came from our own fights. Bala Ged’s overrun. Gone the way of Sejiri. Everyone’s running to Sea Gate, but who knows if we can hold that.
Gideon: Sea Gate… Right… I’ll meet you there. Right now I need to… go place.
Munda: You need to sleep. Maybe have something to eat. You look exhausted.
Gideon: Can’t. Gotta be at work in an hour.
Munda: What work? We’re in an apocalyptic situation and all society in that general direction has collapsed.
Gideon: Well, the thing about that is THERE’S A BALOTH BEHIND YOU!
Munda: Wha-
(Gideon planeswalks away.)
Art by Richard Wright
THE MILLENNIAL
RAVNICA
(Gideon bursts into the Millennial, one of the finest, most expensive restaurants in the entire city-plane of Ravnica. He’s still covered in dirt and Eldrazi ichor.)
Maitre’d: Sir, you can’t just-
Gideon: (Flashes a badge) Official Boros business, stand aside, civilian.
(Gideon marches up to a table full of finely dressed goblins)
Krenko, the devilishly handsome goblin leader in a homemade crown: Can I help you, officer?
Gideon: You’re under arrest for arson and six counts of murder… And that’s just today.
Krenko: Sorry, officer, but this crown means I don’t have to listen to you.
Gideon: And why is that?
Krenko: Because it’s made of knives.
Gideon: (Sigh)
Art by Richard Wright
A BOROS GARRISON
RAVNICA
Dars, a real, actual Boros Soldier: Great work as always, Jura!
Gideon: (heavy breathing) Thanks. I try.
Krenko, in cuffs, covered in blood: Seemed a bit unprofessional if you ask me.
Dars: We don’t. You’re going straight into lockup… After medical care, of course.
Gideon: He’s fine… The blood’s mine.
Dars: Aren’t you invincible?
Gideon: I’d thought so...
Dars: Then how…
Gideon: Krenko must’ve been tougher than the other criminals I’ve fought… and the Eldrazi… and that vampire… and the pyromancer… and the titan… and Erebos, God of the Dead.
Dars: He must be as powerful as he is handsome.
Gideon: He is very handsome.
Real, actual photograph by Empire State Photography
Also Karl Kopinski and Winona Nelson
(STRANGE OBJECT THROWN THROUGH THE WINDOW!)
Dars: IT’S A BOMB!
Gideon: It’s a letter.
Dars: A letter bomb?
Gideon: It’s from Rikkig and Gardagig, two of the Shattergang goblins. They want us to hand over Krenko for murdering their brother, or… then the bomb.
Dars: Why do these goblins insist on killing each other?
Krenko: Well, when we kill non-goblins, your pink asses call us racist.
Gideon: ...I’ll go deal with them. As soon as I run some errands first.
Art by Vincent Proce
ZENDIKAR
(Gideon fights some Eldrazi on Zendikar. Munda’s there, too. And a random sorceress who shoots lightning bolts.)
Munda: Hey, Gideon, buddy, pal, bro… Remember when I said everyone was running to Sea Gate?
Gideon: Yes…
Munda: Turns out that includes the Eldrazi.
Gideon: Well, slith. On my way. After goblins.
Art by Michael Komarck
RAVNICA
(Gideon busts down the door to a warehouse)
Gideon: It’s over, Rikkig! I already captured your brother offscreen!
Rikkig’s voice, from somewhere inside the building: Didn’t bring Krenko, huh? And here I was going to exchange my hostages for yours.
(Light goes on in back, revealing a group of old women, children, and kittens tied up.)
Gideon: I can’t just hand over a prisoner! He’s been lawfully arrested, just like you’ll be!
(Rikkig steps out, wearing twelve layers of padding, a helmet, and goggles)
Rikkig: Well, if you don’t have a Krenko for me, I still have something for you.
(Rikkig throws a bomb)
(Things explode)
(Rikkig is padded. Gideon is indestructible. The hostages scream. The building begins burning and collapsing.)
Gideon: Damn damn damn!
(Gideon rushes to save the hostages. There’s a lot of them. He can only carry a few at a time. The building continues to burn.)
Dars: NEVER FEAR! THE BOROS LEGION IS HERE!
(Boros rush the building, rescue hostages, put out the fire. Rikkig escapes.)
Gideon: How did you get here so fast?
Dars: Followed you. You seemed like you were biting off a bit more than you can chew.
Gideon: I can handle it myself:
Dars: No. No, you can’t. We’re a Legion. We use tactics and teamwork so screw ups like this don’t happen. We’re going to go send a bunch of guys to catch that one goblin, and you’re going to sleep.
Gideon: But if I do that, who’s going to fight the giant monsters?
Dars: What?
Gideon: Bye. (Gideon planeswalks away.)
Art by Nic Klein
Art by Igor Kieryluk
SEA GATE, A BIG DAM CITY
ZENDIKAR
(ALL THE ELDRAZI ATTACK THE CITY! Hundreds of Eldrazi. Thousands of Eldrazi. Millions and billions and… okay, maybe not that many. In the center: Gideon, indestructible and kicking ass.)
Gideon: I don’t care how many of you I have to kill! I can do this all day! I haven’t slept in a week and I’m not about to start now!
Jori En, a mermaid who is evenly distributed human and fish: HELP! HELP!
(Gideon bursts into a burning building, scoops up the mermaid, and runs off as it collapses behind them)
Gideon: Why didn’t you evacuate with the others?
Jori En: My friend Kendrin and I were checking for records about the Hedrons! She almost figured out what they do and how they’re supposed to stop the Eldrazi!
Gideon: That’s wonderful! Where is she?
Jori En: Uhh… In that building.
Gideon: Oh.
Jori En: Yeah…
Gideon: So…
Jori En: But I have all her notes! Unfortunately, she was a complete nerd and I don’t understand any of them.
Gideon: …. Go. Run. Get to safety. I’ll catch up with you as soon as I can.
Jori En: You have a plan?
Gideon: I have a nerd.
Art by Adam Paquette
JACE’S SANCTUM
RAVNICA
(We cut to Jace Beleren, a blue cloak with a wizard inside it. With him is Lavinia, his assistant and bodyguard.)
Lavinia: That was your last meeting for today. Time to have a healthy dinner, and then get to bed early.
Jace Beleren: Or I’ll fill myself with coffee and stay up until three in the morning solving Sudoku. Sudokus? Sudoki.
Lavinia: You’re going to be grouchy all day tomorrow if you do that.
Jace: You can’t tell me what to do. You’re not my mom. I think. I honestly don’t remember.
Lavinia: I distinctly remember not being your mother.
Jace: Then I’ll see you at work first thing in the morning!
Lavinia: ...Of course. Goodnight, Jace. (Lavinia heads off)
(Jace starts to fetch his coffee when… there’s a knock on the bookshelf)
Jace: WHO IS- … wait. Who even knows about my secret passage? (Jace magically opens the bookshelf from a distance, preparing for trouble)
Liliana Vess, hasn’t aged a day in years: Jace! Snookums! (Walks right in.)
Jace: No.
Liliana: How are you, dear! I’ve missed you! You never showed for our last date!
Jace: That’s probably because you tried to kill me.
Liliana: Oh, pish posh. That was on Nicol Bolas’ orders. I’m freelance now.
Jace: You killed my best friend.
Liliana: And I killed my brother. This isn’t a competition, you know.
Jace: What do you want?
Liliana: I missed you! Can’t a girl visit her lover without getting the third degree?
Jace: (incredulous) You came all the way to Ravnica, presumably went to a lot of effort to find my secret passage, and showed up here unannounced because you missed me?
Liliana: I thought we could catch up. Spend some time together. Talk about our feelings.
Jace: You’re a murderer and a liar, and that’s not even bringing up that you managed to turn Garruk into some sort of superpowered psychopath hunting ‘the most dangerous game’ from plane to plane.
Liliana: Yeah, that was fun.
Jace: Go away.
Liliana: Take me to dinner.
Jace: ...You’re not leaving if I don’t play along, are you?
Liliana: I am not.
Jace: Fine.
Art by Dave Kendall
(Jace and Liliana start walking down the street)
Little Old Lady: Sir! Buy a flower for your girlfriend?
Jace: She’s not my girlfriend! She’s some sort of insufferable hell-witch who refuses to leave me alone for arcane purposes she won’t tell me about.
Little Old Lady: Oh, of course! Buy a flower for your wife?
Jace: Grrrrrrrrrr…..
THE MILLENNIAL
RAVNICA
Maitre’d: Please forgive the mess, Sir Guildpact. We had an incident the other day… Of course, we’ll make sure it doesn’t inconvenience you. (He shows Jace and Liliana to a table)
Jace: It’s fine, it’s fine. Just… It’s fine.
Liliana: That Guildpact title is useful. How is it being grand high king of Ravnica?
Jace: I’m not the King. I’m just a grand high Judge. I uphold the law. I don’t create it.
Liliana: Well, that sounds positively boring. You should become king. I’m sure you could pull it off.
Jace: I really don’t want to be king… And speaking of what I want, what do you want?
Liliana: The lobster looks positively-
Jace: I meant with me. Why are you making me take you out to dinner?
Liliana: Because I wanted to see you. Why would you think there was anything else? Do you think I can’t handle my demons on my own?
Jace: They are four particularly large-
Liliana: Two. I already killed Kothophed and Griselbrand. With the Chain Veil. It’s a wonderful artifact that grants ultimate power that is working out great for everybody involved.
Jace: Uh...huh.
Liliana: It certainly doesn’t have some sort of magical hooks in me that I need help understanding.
Jace: Of course not.
Liliana: And I’ll be perfectly fine studying it on my own.
Jace: Great.
Liliana: I can handle this.
Jace: Good to know. So you just want to sit with me and eat dinner?
Liliana: Yes.
Jace: And nothing else?
Liliana: Why? What are you implying.
Maitre’d: (at the entrance) SIR! NO! NOT AGAIN!
Jace: Hmm?
Art by David Rapoza
Gideon Jura, covered in Eldrazi goop: Need to see the Guildpact.
Maitre’d: Sir, you are covered in I don’t know what! We can’t afford another-
Gideon: Zendikar! It’s about Zendikar!
Jace: (softly) Damn it. (loudly) Send him in!
Maitre’d: Oh, all right…
Gideon: (staggers in) Beleren. Zendikar.
Jace: I’m sort of in the middle of something right now. What do you want?
Liliana: Right, he’s on a date! Go away!
Gideon: (Deep breath) Zendikar is being overrun by the Eldrazi, and we have notes on how the Hedrons might be able to stop them, but I need help from someone with skills I don’t have. Will you please help me?
Jace: … Say that last part again?
Gideon: ...Will you please help me?
Jace: You know what? Sure!
Gideon: Great, we can leave right-
Jace: In the morning. I need to have a healthy dinner and get to bed on time or I’ll be grouchy all day, and you need to get to a healer and rest as well. That’s the offer, take it or leave it.
Gideon: I… alright. Thank you.
Liliana: What the falkenrath, Jace? Here I come, all the way from Innistrad, with my magical artifact and two demons left to kill, and you’re willing to just run off with this oversized slab of beef with barely any explanation?
Jace: Is that a problem?
Liliana: Of course it’s a problem! You were supposed to come and help me!
Jace: Really? Huh. You should’ve said something.
Art by Jaime Jones
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You Don’t Have to Bear it Alone
An Excerpt from my Novel-Length Fanfic The Dog and the Duckling
Summary: Sirius is assigned to mentor Marlene Mckinnon when she joins The Order of the Phoenix. His perceptions of Hufflepuff house are drastically changed, and so is his life.
Rated Teen mostly for language and innuendo.
A/N: So most everyone who follows me will have gathered that I headcanon Marlene as Duck animagus for a lot of the fic I write. I decided to put some of the backstory of that up on Tumblr in case anyone was curious. I’ll keep these blurbs listed in chronological order on my Fic Masterlist.
Like Confetti Thrown in Celebration of your Face
Sirius had gotten quite bored of looking at the same old peeling wallpaper in the little parlor room at the Leaky. It had very likely never been a thing of beauty; 40 years or so in, it was practically offensive to his eyes. Or maybe he’d just spent too much time there recently. He had an unconfirmed, but in his opinion, a very plausible theory that he was afflicted with a mild allergy to routine.
Since he had no particular magic to work on with Marlene for the day, he suggested they work on paperwork at a little muggle library that he knew of. They even served tea, done the muggle way. It was quaint and a nicer way to spend the afternoon than wishing he’d learned a spell to set wallpaper on fire without harming anything else.
They’d need to wrap up soon. The glass ceiling revealed the light of an orange-red sun that was near setting. The pair made haste of finishing their assessment of the discrepancies in the files The Order held on a wizard called Igor Karkaroff. Sirius looked up from the stack of papers and noticed that a little grey tabby cat was pawing at the closest window.
“Something’s wrong, Marlene. That’s Minerva outside.”
“...Professor McGonagall? That cat? Oh hey. That’s her alright. I wouldn’t have recognized her but it is. What on earth is she doing here?”
Down in the pit of his stomach he knew it had to be something terrible. It was never anything good. Not like this.
“She wouldn’t have come here if it wasn’t important. I could be called out on a mission. There could be an attack. You should go home to your family. I have to deal with this. We’ll talk later.”
“I’ll go if you want me to, but I want to stay with you. See what’s wrong. I want to help.”
Marlene had joined the order before the conventional time frame precisely because she wanted to help. She was as scared as all the other students in her year but she saw nothing useful in lying in wait. Waiting to enlist wouldn’t stop her from being targeted. She was at risk and so was everyone she cared about. Learning to protect herself and allying herself with the Order seemed the logical thing to do. She cared about the world and wanted to put every effort she could muster into saving it from falling into the hands of a dark wizard. If not her, then who?
“Come on outside then, we need to see what McGonagall has to say and then you can decide what you’re going to do.”
They made their way outside to follow McGonagall. The little tabby hurried into a back alleyway where her phasing back into her human form would go unseen and undisturbed. Both Sirius and Marlene felt sick with worry. There was no one who was safe. Just about everyone they knew and loved could be in imminent danger, if they weren't already dead.
“Sirius…Miss McKinnon. I’m sorry I had to interrupt your work like this. Dumbledore sent me to be the bearer of bad news. Sirius, there’s been reports of the death of your brother Regulus.”
Minerva put a hand on Sirius’s shoulder. This boy had been one of her Gryffindors just a few short years ago. He raised more than his share of hell but she loved him nonetheless, in her way. She’d been as shocked as everyone else when the hat sat atop the Black child’s head and called out Gryffindor. Poor little thing had stood frozen in terror until she urged him to the Gryffindor table with a kind hand on his shoulder, just like now.
“I suppose I should have known.” Sirius’s voice was barely above a whisper. He stared off into space. His immediate reaction was shame. How could he have been so stupid to not prepare himself for this? This was his lot in life and he shouldn’t have felt the rush of pain so acutely.
“I don’t know Regulus’s reasons for defecting… but it’s possible that he had some good left in him. I’m so sorry my boy.”
Sirius nodded because he didn’t know what to say.
Reg… my little brother...
He’d sealed his fate when he ran. Or maybe before that. When he took the dark mark. His days were numbered when he put his life in the hands of a monster. Sirius hadn’t spoken to him in nearly 5 years… the last time he saw Regulus, he was with the death eaters who attacked and tortured a muggle-born shopkeeper… he didn’t even look at Sirius. Now he’d never look at him again.
“Murdered by Voldemort?”
“From the information I’ve been given it sounds like he-who-must-not-be-named sent someone after Regulus. Trackers. He probably wanted to make an example of your brother, in case anyone else were to think of running. He’s ruling by fear. That’s his philosophy. I wish I could do something to make this easier for you, Sirius, but I’m afraid all that I can do is give you my deepest sympathies.”
“I hadn’t heard from Regulus in years. Maybe he just… got scared. I… uhh… thank you for coming in person, Minerva. I appreciate that. I..uh.. need to go.”
Shit. Fuck. Shit.
He felt like the floor had come out from under him. Everything had gone to complete hell and he was about to cry over his dead brother...who wasn’t even a decent person...in front of Marlene and fucking Minerva McGonagall too for that matter. He couldn’t breathe. He needed to be anywhere else and immediately.
Later, he’d think of how it was terribly inconsiderate to disapparate without making sure Marlene had a way home. But he hadn’t been in a stable enough frame of mind to be thoughtful. He didn’t consider it at all until he was already inside his flat. Alone. Fallen to his knees just a few paces inside the door.
Fuck. Fucking Regulus. Why couldn’t he have had a spine? Why couldn’t he see through the tripe they were fed? Why did Sirius have to have these people as his family?
Sirius always worked hard to avoid thinking of his childhood. He pushed the memories away any time they threatened to float to the front of his mind. He refused to think of the trouble they got up to when we were left for Kreacher to care for. He’d wanted to forget that he’d had a family… even a really dysfunctional one… because it was easier to have a total void in his past than to confront those few funny images that crept in from the depths of his memories. The sounds of childish laughter when he got his 7 year old brother stuck up a tree or magically bound to the cat were more haunting than the fact he was all alone.
It was easier to pretend Reg didn’t exist than to think of the times he thought he could save him. He’d felt responsible for him but then he’d given up and walked away from it all out of self preservation. He couldn’t think of that and then reconcile himself with the fact Regulus decided to take The Mark.
He’d always been a coward. Weak. He had no will of his own. Regulus Black had been a meer vessel for the expectations others placed upon him. Really, the only trait that was his brother’s own, in Sirius’s recollection, was cowardice.
Why did he still feel like he should have protected him? Regulus wasn’t a little boy who was being bullied by older cousins… he could have made different choices. He didn’t. Sirius wasn’t… capable of protecting him from his own character. But the news of his death still came to Sirius like a punch in the gut. It didn’t matter what he could or couldn’t have done.
He poured himself an overly generous glass of Ogden’s Firewhiskey and downed it in one. It burned. He wished that it could burn all this idiotic conflict out of himself. He was fairly sure that wasn’t how it worked, but he had no better plan of action.
A noise jarred him out of his head. It was quite an effort to force himself to lift his head from his hands and see what was causing it.
It was the door. He hoped it was just someone trying to sell him crap at a very inopportune moment. Otherwise…
He poured another glass of the burning amber drink and guzzled it down quickly as he listened to the voice behind the door. Marlene. She’d mentioned that she’d already taken the apparition classes. She was meant to take the test next month. It appeared that she had apparated unlicensed for him.
Uggghh.
“I’m so sorry, Sirius. Is there anything I can do? Are you alone in there? Do you want me to contact anyone or get you anything? I’ll bugger off if that’s what you need. I just wanted you to know that I’m here and I’d like to help if I can.”
Why did she have to be so fucking nice? He thought about how she could have backed slowly away from Sirius and his disaster of a family situation. He would have backed away from himself if that were possible. She was a fundamentally good person. Kind in a way that Sirius had seldom encountered. He didn’t even deserve a person that good in his life. But she had offered her help and he wasn’t a decent enough person to turn her away.
The effects of unwise portions of hard liquor that he’d ingested all at once hit him like a bludgeor to the head as he found his footing. He stumbled to the door and opened it.
By the way she looked at him, she really didn’t seem to think less of him for any of this. It was hard to turn that kind of person away if she’s at your door willing to be an ear to listen to your incoherent and increasingly intoxicated blubbering.
“You didn’t have to come. But thanks. Even though we’ve only known each other for what… two weeks? You’re just… here…asking to help. I’m sorry for leaving you there. As you could see, I was very close to going bug-fuck insane with all that. I might have come home and poured a bunch of firewhisky on my problems. Now I’m still a fucking mess but also drunk. I don’t know why you even bother with me.”
“I want to help because you’re incredible and brave. You could have made choices that made your life so much easier but you’re here. I lucked into getting to spend all this time with you. So really, keeping you company while you’re a drunk panicked mess is the very least I can do.”
“You’re crazy. You really don’t have to stay to babysit me. I’m sure I’ll be ok. I’ll floo James tomorrow.”
“I’m staying unless you really want me to leave.”
She wiped a tear from his face and took his hand. He really did want her to stay. With that tiny little hand came a wash of comfort. He didn’t have the emotional energy to feel conflicted about the weirdness between them. He just… was glad she was there.
“You know I feel like a monster because I hardly even reacted to my own father being murdered? He was. Nearly a year ago. It wasn’t like this. I just… Reg.”
“I don’t think you’re a monster Sirius.”
He didn’t feel like spilling the gruesome details of his father’s character and how someone like that treats his children. His father had left him bruised and bloodied from curses that he’d created himself, but those wounds had long since healed. The guilt he felt about Regulus would be harder to heal. Guilt. Shame. Fear. His mother’s weapons of choice. Harder to escape. The whole thing was hard to talk about but words spilled out given the circumstances.
“My father was cruel and my brother was a weak coward and now they’re both dead. Mum’s all alone now. And I’m probably just as bad as any of them because I’m thinking about how much she deserves to suffer. I hope she suffers alone.”
Sirius felt the effects of too much to drink too quickly in his head and stomach and everywhere else too while he was at it. This was really bad.
“I don’t know anything about your family other than what you just told me, and that you were disowned for rejecting the pure-blood rubbish they believed. But I know you aren’t as bad as someone who hurt you because you’re angry that you were hurt. That’s not how it works.”
“I don’t know how it works at all. I give up. I’m turning into a dog permanently and just living out my days. Dogs don’t have so many disgusting feelings.”
“...You can’t… turn into a dog? Or…wait. You can turn into a dog? Like an animagus?”
“Aaahhhhfuck. Whoops. No one is supposed to know. I didn’t… I’ve never slipped up before. Bollocks... Hope I don’t remember this in the morning because I’m really gonna beat myself up about it if I do.” He drew out the word ‘really’.
Sirius just didn’t have the energy or the cognitive function to properly beat himself up at that moment. Blurting that out was uncharacteristic, sort of like this whole thing with Marlene had been.
“I won’t say anything… but please don’t live out your days as a dog. I’d miss you.”
Marlene was going to need to process the animagus business at a later date. She felt compelled to do whatever she could to bring Sirius a little comfort after he’d been dealt the wretched blow of the news of his brother’s murder.
“I asked him to come with me.” He mumbled.
“Your brother? When?”
“When I left home. When my mum burned me off of the tree. I begged Reg to come with me. I thought if he could get out of that horrid house and away from those horrid people then maybe he could have a chance. He… well obviously it didn’t go that way.”
“I’m so sorry. You must have really cared about him to want give him that chance. It isn’t your fault that he didn’t take it.”
“I could have tried harder. My parents were both cruel in their different ways. And I left Reg there to live with that alone when he was just 14. I should have tried harder.”
“You did everything you could. You went above and beyond. You could have just stayed neutral and kept out of it. But you are in the Order working every day against the sort of evil you saw. I can’t… even express how big of a deal that is to me. You’re an amazing wizard Sirius.”
“You….”
He felt dizzy and a bit sick. It showed. He hoped Marlene would still think all these nice things about him if he had to run to the loo to be sick.
He looked at her from where he was seated beside her on the sofa. And everything felt out of focus. It seemed like the floor itself was unsteady.
Suddenly he was horizontal with his head was on Marlene’s lap. He wasn’t sure how he got like that. His eyes were still fixed on her though. He hadn’t looked away. She was really pretty.
“I have lots of feelings and I hate them. But I like you and I like your freckles. They’re like confetti. Thrown in celebration of your face.”
“I think that’s the nicest thing a drunk person has ever said to me. You look like you’re going to pass out Sirius. Let me help you to bed.”
He nodded affirmatively, but didn’t find words. She stood up and pulled him by the hands up to his unsteady feet. She held onto him as he stumbled into the bedroom and collapsed onto his bed.
“Do you need anything? Can I get you some water?”
“Can you stay with me? At least until I’m asleep? That sounds rather pathetic… but I’m too drunk for pride.”
“You aren’t pathetic. You’re… unthinkably brave. I’ll stay. Budge up.”
Generally speaking, either of the pair would have had more misgivings about getting into bed together. There was so much else going on though, that neither had it in them to object. She slid in beside him. The bed was a big enough that they weren’t even touching.
“Oh Merlin… I’m sorry. This makes me seem like a creep.” He blurted out the half hearted apology as she settled in.
In his inebriated state, he hadn’t really thought it through before asking Marlene to stay. He didn’t want to make her uncomfortable. Her presence was undeniably a comfort to him. He wanted her to know that but couldn’t get his drunk tongue around the words.
“Relax. No one’s a creep. My niece and nephew always want me to come in bed with them when they have nightmares. I can do the same for you.”
Marlene stroked his dark wavy hair and thought about how different she felt about him now than she had just a few weeks ago.
She’d dreamt of getting in bed with Sirius Black for longer than she’d care to admit, but now she was actually in his bed all she wanted was to help him through this horrible experience. He was still devastatingly handsome, but she could see past that now, to this incredible person who was hurting and thought he had to do so alone.
“War is painful. We can’t stop it from hurting. But you don’t have to bear it alone. Ok, Sirius?”
“Thank you” he was almost asleep. But she was glad he heard her. He needed to know.
She kissed his forehead just once in a comforting gesture and reigned in any and all further impulses fairly easily.
He was asleep within minutes and she wasn’t terribly far behind him.
She woke up in his arms the next morning. They must have drifted together during the night. She pretended to be asleep for as long as possible so as to prolong her time there.
#blackinnon#Sirius Black#sirius black x marlene mckinnon#fanfic#harry potter fanfiction#fanfiction#marauders era#marlene mckinnon#marauders fic#Marauders#minerva mcgonagall#Duckling-verse
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uhh so i’ll just pretend @softbottas tagged me
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i don’t have anyone to tag sooo feel free to answer these and say i tagged u
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