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#which is PAINFUL and not something I want to do
dduane · 3 days
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I just received a copy of a book I've been very much looking forward to by a favorite author, but the quality of the book itself is... not great. Cheap paper, weak binding, even a weird illustration of the main character on the cover that I'm having trouble believing the author approved. Obviously, I don't want to leave a bad review on Amazon or GoodReads or anywhere, as I'm 100% certain the content is as excellent as her other work. But how can I best let the publisher (Baen) know I'm disappointed without threatening to never buy her books again? Because, well, if this is the only option, I'm gonna keep buying them even in my disappointment.
Well, the first thing I thought when I read this was "Wow, I'm really glad I don't have anything in print from Baen at the moment except a couple of anthologized short stories." :)
As for the rest of it, let's take it point by point.
Adding a cut here, because this will run a bit long. Caution: contains auctorial bitching and moaning, painful illustrations of cases in point, and brief advice on how to complain most effectively. (Also links to paintings of cats.)
Cheap paper: This has been an accurate complaint since well before COVID—and it's often been worse since, with supply chain issues also being involved. That said: one way publishers routinely save money on printing books, especially the bigger ones, is by going for thinner/cheaper paper. I remember one of our UK editors going on at great length and with huge annoyance—during one of those late-night convention-bar bitch sessions—over how the only way they could get some really good books published (because Upstairs insisted on reducing the per-copy production costs) was by reducing the paper quality to the point where you could nearly read through it. Sacrificing decent text size(s) also became part of this. Nobody in editorial was happy about the result: but there wasn't much they could do.
Bad bindings: Similar problem. Sewn bindings used to be a thing in paperbacks... but not any more: not for a good while, now. These days, it's all glue. Even hardcovers are showing up glued rather than sewn. Don't get me started. :/ (This is why I so treasure some of the oldest paperbacks I've acquired, which are actually sewn.)
Crap covers: I've had my share of these—though my share of some really good ones, too. And one of the endless frustrations of traditional publishing is that the writer routinely has little or even no influence over what the cover will look like... let alone how much will be spent on it, or (an often-related issue) how good the execution will be.
There are of course exceptions. If you're working at the, well, @neil-gaiman -esque level or similar in publishing, a lot more attention is going to be paid to your thoughts. You may even be able to get "cover veto" written into your contracts, so that if you disapprove, changes will get made. But without actual contractual stipulations, the writer has zero legal recourse or way to withhold approval. (And I bet even Neil has some horror stories.)
The normal workflow looks like this. After a book's purchased, its editor and the art director discuss what it's about and what the cover should look like. The art director then hires an artist and tells them what to do. After that, the artist executes their vision and gets paid. It is incredibly rare for a writer to have any significant input into this process. And as to whether or not they approve of the final result, well... the publisher mostly just shrugs and goes back to eyeing the bottom line, muttering "Who told them they get a vote?"
Now, I've been seriously lucky to occasionally be an exception in this regard. In particular, my editors at Harcourt (when Jane Yolen and Michael Stearns were editing Harcourt's Magic Carpet YA imprint) would ask me what I thought would be a good idea for the next Young Wizards cover, and I'd think about it a bit and send them back a paragraph or so about some core scene. They'd then talk to their art director, and after that send their notes and mine to Cliff Nielsen (who started doing the covers for the hardcover and mass-market paperback editions of the series in the mid-90s) or to Greg Swearingen (who was the artist on the digest-format editions). And the results, by and large, were pretty good. ...I also think affectionately of the UK artist Mick Posen, who insisted on seeing pictures of our cats before painting the covers for the Hodder editions of The Book of Night with Moon and On Her Majesty's Wizardly Service (the UK title for To Visit The Queen).
But this kind of treatment is a courtesy—not even vaguely suggested in the books' contracts, and very much the exception to the rule. And for every writer who's midlist, there are times when the luck runs out. For example: one time I wrote a book that was an AU-Earth-near-future fantasy police procedural, thematically pretty dark—dealing with issues of abuse of megacorporate power, institutionalized bigotry, and (explicitly) attempted genocide. And the cover, done by an artist who's a good friend and some of whose fabulous art hangs in our house, came out looking like this. It was... let's just say "not ideally representative."
So I was glad, when my local workflow allowed it, to recover the current, revised version of the book with something at least a little more apropos. But the original cover's not the artist's fault. He did what the art director told him... as a cover artist must do to get paid, and (ideally) to get hired again. At present, that's how the system works.
...So. You've got a badly-built and -presented book on your hands. How best to make your feelings known in some way that might make a difference down the line? (As you make it plain that you'll keep buying this author's books this way if you must.)
First of all: when (as part of my psych nursing training) we were taught how to complain most effectively, we were told that the first and most basic rule of the art is this:
Only Complain To Someone Who Can Actually Do Something About Your Problem
So I salute your desire not to waste your time taking the issue to the reviews on Amazon, or the pages of Goodreads... because they can't do anything. The odds that anyone from production at Baen is reading the comments there strike me as... well, not infinitesimally small, not being hit-by-a-meteorite-while-in-the-shopping-center-parking-lot small... but really low.
So: write to corporate.
In your place I would go online and rummage around a bit to find out who's on record as the publisher at Baen. I would then write them a letter on paper. And I would lay out the problem pretty much as you laid it out up at the top.
The tone I think I'd choose would be the more-in-sorrow-than-in-anger approach. I'd say, "I write to comment about your recently published book by [X Writer], whose work I love. I have to say, though, that I don't think the cover on [X Book] is terribly representative of the quality of the prose inside. And also, the construction and production quality of the book itself was a disappointment to me because [here spell out why].
"I'd really like to see [X. Writer's] books succeed with you, and I'd like to buy more of them without wondering whether I was going to be disappointed again. But if this is typical of how they're being produced, I'd also be concerned that the state of these books is setting up a situation in which the author's sales will be damaged, and you would stop publishing them... which would really be a shame. Whereas on the other hand, better production quality could keep previous purchasers coming back and buying, not only more books by this author, but books by others whom you publish."
This phrasing, as you'll have seen, walks a bit wide around the issue of your further purchases, while directing attention toward the bottom line... which will routinely be what the publisher's looking at from day to day. And—being, one has to hope, in possession of the wider picture as regards what's going on with their production costs—maybe they can actually do something about it.
Anyway, nothing ventured, nothing gained, yeah? It's worth a try. All you can do is hope for the best.
And finally: please know that I admire your commitment to the author: whoever she is, she's lucky to have you. It's a terrific thing to have readers who'll willing to spend the time to hunt you down, and who're willing not to judge a book by its cover. :)
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reidrum · 3 days
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two millimeters | s.r
a/n: this was literally born bc i saw reid lying on the couch in the jet at the end of demons and thought ‘i would literally sit against that wall to watch over him on the way back’ so i wrote it
summary: spencer gets hurt and you’re not leaving his side
cw: season 9 finale spoilers for angels & demons, cm violence, hurt/comfort, unestablished relationship
wc: 0.6k
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two millimeters to the right, and it would’ve hit his carotid.
the sentence replays in your head like a cursed mantra, rendering your other senses useless. you couldn’t hear the doctor say you could see him now, or feel penny tug your arm towards the room. and you certainly couldn’t believe your eyes when you saw spencer reid in a hospital bed, hooked up to machines and iv drips, with a big fucking gauze dressage on the side of his neck.
you knew your line of work was dangerous, being a federal agent who hunts down serial killers should be enough to prove that. but it never surprised you seeing the panic that overtook all of you when one of your own was hurt.
the pure terror you felt in this moment though, was something without parallel.
two millimeters. two millimeters. two millimeters.
you’re not even sure how it happened. they were on the way to tell the preacher he was innocent, and instead he opens fire on federal agents? it was a cruel twist of fate, spencer doing what he could to protect his people and pushing blake out of the way but getting hit himself. it wasn’t anyone’s fault either, the preacher had military grade machine guns, and spencer would have done what he did for anyone. you made sure to tell blake that.
but your spencer was hurt. and all you wanted to do was take away his pain somehow, and toss it in a river to never be seen again.
two millimeters. two millimeters. two millimeters.
“hey,” you hear a voice pull you out of your head. looking up you’re met with tired soft brown eyes lying down on the jet’s couch, “i’m okay, honey. please go sit on a chair.”
if spencer had all his strength he would lecture you on the dangers of not being properly restrained on an aircraft and the statistics of plane related injuries. but that was the problem, he didn’t have all his strength. and you were not going to let him out of your sight.
which is why you are sitting on the floor of the jet, perched in front of the couch where spencer laid, resting your head on the cushion his head was on, body leaning against couch’s frame. and you planned to stay right there until you landed back in quantico.
“looks like this flight is overbooked,” your section unit chief teased upon seeing you on the ground, “hopefully the brass sees our good work and gives us a bigger jet next year.”
morgan, hotch, even jj offered you their seats to at least get some rest, something you hadn’t had in days.
“i’m fine right here.” you spoke softly.
jj and penny looked at you in concern, but knew you wouldn’t be swayed to move anyway. your stubbornness always acted as a curse and a blessing.
spencer moved his hand to graze your cheek gently, “the doctors fixed me up really good, i promise i’m okay.”
you move your hand to rest on top of his, slowly rubbing your thumb into the curve of his palm, “and i promise i’m okay right here. i’m not moving.”
two millimeters. two millimeters. two millimeters.
two millimeters would haunt you for many years to come, but maybe right now you could use it to measure how much closer you can get to spencer till there’s only two millimeters between you.
spencer knew this was a war he was not winning, and let his hand intertwine with yours. if you weren’t so close to him you might’ve missed the faintest “thank you” escape from his lips. the jet takes off and the two of you are lulled to sleep almost immediately. the rest of the team unspokenly watched over you both, making sure you weren’t rattling around or spencer rolling around too much. and penny couldn’t help but take a few pics to show you later.
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— your wounds make me bleed.
synopsis. you, being the oh so powerful sorcerer you are, did not even realise the extent of your injuries until you found out that you couldn't stand without the support of something— after defeating the curse, of course. shoko's busy, so, satoru, being the gentleman he is (and also the strange source of comfort you have) decides to take matters in his own hands— while being a pain in the ass, obviously.
however, you joking about your death does not help— and satoru's carefree façade manages to slip, bringing back some memories he had tried to forget.
genres/themes. satoru gojo x reader, hurt/comfort, satoru and reader are highschool friends (frenemies ?), satoru and reader bicker a lot, satoru being a menace, reader is also a menace (lmaoo), mentions of blood (reader is injured), mentions of satoru's past, reader comforts satoru.
yoi’s notes. i miss him so much that it physically hurts me. send help LMAOO—
word count. 1.8k
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“tsk. and here i thought that you could take care of yourself, at least,” the white-haired man tuts, and you feel yourself roll your eyes to the back of your head for god-knows-what time again— and that of course earns a smirk from him. “how disappointing. and ah, don’t roll your eyes so much. you might just have a view of your non-existent brain and pass out on me. jeez, i wouldn’t want you to dirty my couch.”
“how fascinating to hear that you care about something, satoru,” your voice feigns bewilderment— a simply amazed look in your eyes as you heave a blissful sigh. “at least you’re not as heartless as i thought. hang on there, expensive leather couch.”
“so you’re admitting you’d pass out, and the fact that you don’t have a brain,” satoru huffs out a laugh, finding amusement in the way you let out a small ‘tsk’ of annoyance.
something about satoru comforts you.
no, it isn’t the comfort that people idealise— no physical contact, no silly gifts or acts of service— it was his mere presence that soothed you, while irritating you at the same time. every word that flowed between you two was either a sugary sweet taunt or a blunt insult— yet, you two found solace in each other in a way that was beyond the comprehension of everyone around you.
including you two.
“if not having a brain will make me cope with your ass, then so be it,” a small smirk tugs at the corner of your lips as you watch satoru wrap the bandage in a firm, yet gentle grip around your arm, relishing in the way his eye twitches and his usual shit-eating grin widens in annoyance.
“at least i didn’t get my ass handed back to me by a grade one curse,” the man lets out a scoff. “seriously, how do you even get this beaten-up?”
“hey, ’t wasn’t my fault i only noticed my blood after defeating it,” you say, shifting your position on that damn couch of his, as you felt a sudden urge to fidget with something, “at least it got exorcised.”
“sure,” satoru says, and you swear you could feel him rolling his eyes even through the confines of his blindfold, “very impressive. at least it got exorcised.”
hearing him say those— your— particular words in that mocking, sing-song voice makes an irritated scowl break out into your face, and oh how it makes satoru smile so smugly— making you want to curse the hell out of this menace of a sorcerer.
“you’re applying too much pressure, dumbass,” you mutter, trying not to wince as his fingers tightened the bandages which covered the skin of your hands.
satoru raises a brow, tightening them even more. “deal with it,” he deadpans. “ ’s your fault, ya know? if i keep it loose you’ll start to bleed. again. over my couch.”
the damned couch again.
honestly? you knew that he couldn’t give lesser shits about the furniture, and that he was just saying that to piss you off. and what was even more infuriating was that it was working.
really, years of experience with satoru gojo had changed nothing— and everything in your feelings towards him.
“get it over with the couch, will ya?” it’s your turn to let out an annoyed scoff, which undoubtedly makes the sorcerer let out a snicker of his own.
“sometimes i wonder how you even ended up becoming a sorcerer,” satoru wraps a band-aid around your scratched fingers, “thought you’d leave the job and become a farmer or somethin’, y’know.”
“unlike you, i had spent too much of an effort in the projects yaga gave us in highschool, so there’s no way i’d let it go in vain,” you shake your head, “it would be too embarrassing.”
besides, you’d rather die than see satoru’s laughing face if you ever decided to change your profession just because you weren’t able to handle a curse or two.
“you never change, do you?” satoru huffs out a laugh, and oh god if he didn’t wipe that agonizing smirk off his face within the next second, you’d gladly do the honours— if only you weren't in so much pain, though, “always so damn reckless. it’s a miracle you have me to tend to your wounds, or else just where you be?”
“dead, most probably,” you say with sarcasm dripping down your words, expecting a scoff of amusement in response— but it never came.
you tear your gaze away from the dried gash on your arm to meet satoru's piercing, piercing stare— it was really a wonder how that guy manages to make you feel his eyes bearing into the depths of your soul even though you couldn't quite actually see them because of the shield his blindfold created.
satoru feels a whirl of emotions in him— eyebrows furrowing ever so slightly, and you just know that he is not, in fact, amused.
not even in the slightest.
his heart is racing— and if he had his blindfold off, you’d see how his usually bright, azure eyes had a darkened glint in them— something which just screamed out the fact that he was unsettled, uncontrolled— afraid.
as the tense seconds pass, he gives you a little glare, his expression hardening.
“. . that’s not funny,” he utters, before averting his gaze down to your arm. his efficient hands wrap the gauze around your limb almost in a mechanical movement— the little frown never leaving his face, lips pressed into a thin line.
oh.
your gaze softens, watching the sorcerer quietly tend to your wounds, noticing how his gaze lingers on a particularly deep gash on your leg— how his fingers tremble ever so slightly when his touch stays on the burn for a little too long— you notice it, of course you do.
he's thinking about suguru again.
there wasn't quite a time when he didn't— at least he didn’t show it to anyone. but you, you see him for who he is— the lonely man who’s just wanted some love, and not just the title of being ‘the strongest’— the man who still yearns for his best friend to come back, even though he's . . . gone.
you always see through him.
you should've considered your words before joking about something like that, really.
no matter how much of an annoying bastard satoru may be to you, but still, he was satoru to you. not 'the strongest', not the guy who always had that stupid smile plastered on his face at all times, not the guy whom the world saw as undefeatable— no, he was something much, much more.
you watch his tense demeanour threaten to consume him alive— how his hands shake no matter how much he tries to make them steady, how his shoulders go rigid when they were usually slumped carelessly, how his bottom lip quivers— it was just a tiny movement, yet you manage to see.
how could you not see earlier that you words would've affected him? god, you felt so stupid.
“ . . hey,” hearing the soft tone in your voice makes something inside satoru snap— raising his head to forcefully avert his gaze from your injuries to your face— heart beating so loud that he’s unsure whether you wouldn’t have noticed.
but then again, you were you, and satoru was, well . . . satoru.
his eyes widen— seeing you open your arms with that soft, apologetic smile— and before the sorcerer knows, he’s burying his nose into the crook of your neck, arms wrapped tight around your injured frame; his lower body on the floor as he nuzzles into your arms on the couch.
most people would’ve hesitated, casted him a wary look of disbelief— the satoru gojo, reduced to a trembling mess just because someone joked about their death? the satoru gojo, who still blames himself for his best friend’s death? the satoru gojo, who’s known as ‘the strongest’— being vulnerable?
indeed, it is the satoru gojo, clinging onto you like a lifeline, large hands of his gripping you so tightly that he's afraid that you might disappear the moment his hold loosens.
your satoru.
arms wrapped around his neck as you shush him, bandaged fingers running through his snowy white strands whilst his shoulders shake— oh how you regretted saying that.
“ . . i hate it when you say stuff like that,” he mutters, and if you didn’t have a knack for noticing subtle things about it, you wouldn’t have seen a barely audible crack in his voice.
“ ’m sorry,” you say in a quiet, soothing tone, pulling away a bit to stare at his face, and god did your heart wrench— satoru's bottom lip was red from him biting on them so much.
gingerly, one of your hands unlatches itself from around his neck, going to gently slip under the hem of his blindfold — as you slowly pull it down, revealing those mystical eyes of his— so terrified that you feel the fear radiating off him.
he seems so, so vulnerable like this— a desperation and fright seizing his entire soul as he stares at you. you cup his cheeks, thumbs caressing his soft, warm skin.
“don’t . . . don’t joke about stuff like that,” he says in breathless, shaky whisper— eyebrows furrowing even more as his breath stutters, and from this moment on you swear to yourself to never say something like that again. not if it hurts satoru.
ever.
“i won’t,” you whisper, pressing your forehead against his, “ ’m sorry, satoru.”
you pull his head down so he’s laying it on your chest, arms wrapped around his neck as you massage his scalp soothingly.
satoru’s shoulders relax, his heart easing a bit from hearing your gentle tone, panicked eyes fluttering close as he lets out a small, shaky sigh, burying his face into your chest— so desperate for comfort, for some kind of reassurance that you are okay, that you won’t leave, that you’ll . . .
stay.
you run your hands through his fluffy locks, gently easing the tension that had accumulated within him with simple movements of your fingertips— earning a soft, relaxed sigh from him.
“keep doing that,” you hear him mutter, and you let out a hum in response, continuing to massage his scalp. “don’t . . . don’t stop. please.”
this is how two you seeked comfort from each other.
something that was beyond words— something that was beyond everyone.
including you two.
as you two lay on the couch— two souls craving reassurances from the other— time ticks by, but oh do you care? not even a bit.
“don’t leave me,” satoru whispers, and you find yourself letting out a murmur of approval, caressing his hair. “i was so scared, i can’t lose you too, i—”
“i’ll stay, satoru.”
and so, you do. as long as you’re here with satoru, he has nothing to fear.
as long as you stay.
☆ @dontcarehowlongittakes on tumblr. do not copy or post any of my works without my permission.
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paarthunaxx · 2 days
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𓏲 ࣪₊♡𓂃 CALL MY NAME, I’M YOURS TO TAME — 18+
larissa weems x fem!reader
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word count: 4.9k
status: completed
summary: You and Larissa Weems have been best friends since your years spent together at Nevermore. You have been meeting for tea every week since your graduation. But when the pharmacy in Jericho runs out of heat suppressants, you have to miss your afternoon tea with her.
And Larissa, being the dutiful best friend, pays you a visit instead.
tags: smvt, fluff, werewolf reader, in heat, kn0tting, decades of mutual pining, established friendship, soft larissa weems, larissa weems with a d1ck, shapeshifting, p in v, nickname mommy, nickname puppy
read here on ao3!
“Here is your tea, dear.”
“Thanks, Riss,” You take the teacup from Larissa’s pale hands and rub the pad of your thumb over the painted golden rim of the cup before setting it down on a pretty white saucer. “So, anything else to catch me up on this week?”
Larissa takes a long sip from her own florally adorned teacup and sinks into the armchair across from you. “Do you remember Morticia Frump?” She asks with the smallest hint of bitterness on her tongue. It doesn't come as a surprise to you. Larissa is a sweet woman, but you don't think you've ever heard her speak about Morticia without that resentment in her voice.
“Yes. Your roommate from when we attended Nevermore?” You nod and settle back into your own chair, folding one leg over the other. You notice Larissa’s gaze lingering on them for a flash of a moment, but don’t bother bringing it up. “You’ve spoken to her recently?”
Larissa gives a grim incline of her head and huffs a soft sigh through her nose. “Indeed. She called last night to request that I meet her child and consider enrolling her in the school.”
“And will you?” You ask curiously, lifting your teacup and taking a slow sip. There is just the right amount of sugar and milk mixed in. Larissa always makes the perfect cup of tea.
“I have a duty to look after the children of outcasts. I would not cast a young girl out just because I am not on the best of terms with her mother,” Larissa whispers. “I just wish I did not have to meet Morticia in order to enrol her daughter. I’m afraid it will be too painful to see her again.”
You send a sympathetic smile in her direction and shift forward in your seat. Leaning across the coffee table, you reach out to squeeze her knee. Her breath hitches at the touch as she watches you like a hawk. “It’ll be okay, Riss. Everything happened so long ago. And if she annoys you… Just think about all the different ways you’d like to fight her, then tell me all about it next week.”
Larissa giggles at that and places her large hand over your smaller one which rests on her knee, giving it a gentle pat. The touch sends a jolt of electricity through you, which you mentally blame on static. “You are right. There’s no point in being so absorbed in the past.”
“I usually am right,” You tease with a soft laugh. “Be the bigger person.”
Larissa raises a neatly plucked eyebrow at that. An amused smirk dances across her painted lips and she quips, “Pun intended?”
You snort around another sip of tea, almost spitting the stuff everywhere. You manage to choke it down and the two of you burst into a fit of giggles. After your laughter trails off, you spend another half an hour catching each other up on everything that has happened in the past week. Just like you have been doing every week for… well, years.
Larissa has been your best friend since you both attended Nevermore. Many times you have looked at her and wondered if there could be something more between you, but you don’t even know if she would want that. If she even likes women. And you’re terrified to risk your friendship by asking her out… No matter how much you adore her.
When the teacups have been drained and the grandfather clock pushed up against the wall starts to chime the hour, you sigh and lean back in your chair. “Time for me to get going.”
Larissa tsks softly, a playful pout poking out her lower lip. “Shame. Time always flies by so quickly with you.”
“I know,” You agree with a short nod. “Maybe we should start doing sleepovers instead of tea.”
“Maybe,” She whispers. A soft pink blush dusts across her pale cheeks and she averts her gaze, clearing her throat. She nudges her empty cup of tea out of the way and rises from her chair, towering over you. “Come on. I’ll walk you out.”
Oh, how you'd love to climb her like a tree.
You follow her out of her dimly lit office and walk by her side as she leads you through the school to the large front entrance. You fit in some more idle chatter along the way through the familiar hallways, before coming to a stop on the stone steps outside.
“Until next week, dear,” Larissa leans down to wrap her arms around you, giving you a tight hug.
“See you then, Riss,” You stretch up on your tiptoes to hug her back, taking a moment to enjoy the scent of her sweet perfume lingering in your nose.
“I’ll be counting the minutes,” She whispers in your ear. There is such conviction in her soft voice that it feels as though she truly means those words.
She gives your waist a gentle squeeze and you reluctantly pull away from her. You can feel your heart hammering in your chest as your brain immediately cries out in protest at the absence of her warmth. With one final goodbye, you turn away from her and make your way down the steps, bracing yourself for the walk home in the bitter afternoon air.
ᥫ᭡
You hum a soft tune to yourself as you bustle around your apartment, struggling with the bundle in your arms. You snatch up every pillow and blanket you can find, tossing them onto the bed to be arranged into a nest later. Each of them have been picked out specifically for the purpose of nesting, every one as warm and comfortable as possible. The pile on the bed is almost bigger than you, and you stand and stare at the mess of blankets with a proud smile on your face. Although you have your suppressants, it still feels comforting to bury into your nest during your heat, even if it is just to nap or read a book. Like being wrapped up in a warm hug from La—
You startle at the sudden shrill ringing of your phone from where it rests on your nightstand. You place a hand over your thundering heart and puff out a breath to calm yourself. In a few long strides, you cross the room and snatch the phone up to answer it. “Hello?”
“Hello! This is the Jericho pharmacy calling,” The familiar voice of Mrs Jones, the pharmacist, comes from the other end of the phone. “We are so terribly sorry for the inconvenience, but we will not be able to refill your prescription for suppressants at the moment. Our supplier has had a stock issue, and we have to wait for more to come from a bigger supplier in the city.”
“What?” You swallow hard, your eyes widening. Panic splits through you like branching lightning, your hand curling into a fist around the phone so hard you almost shatter it. “How long will that take?”
“Around a week and a half,” The pharmacist informs you.
“A week and a half? But… My heat starts tomorrow, and I don’t have any suppressants,” You whisper. “I haven’t gone through a heat in years. You don’t even have enough to get me through the week?”
“I’m afraid not. I’m so sorry. We can fill your next prescription free of charge as an apology for the delay. And if you need scent blockers, we can have them dropped outside your door.”
“Alright… Well, thank you for telling me. See you in a week and a half,” You hang up and toss your phone on the bed. Scrubbing your hands irately down your face, you mutter one word.
“Shit.”
ᥫ᭡
Sleep doesn’t come easily to you that night. Even wrapped up in the bundles of pillows and blankets that have been arranged for your nest, you can’t stop tossing and turning. Anxiety floods through your veins, making your body feel cold and your chest tight. It’s been so long since you allowed your body to go through a heat. There will be years of pent up energy in control of your body, and it's terrifying. You turned to the internet, searching through outcast forums to find out whether it will be more intense when it comes. Every werewolf in the world seems to be in agreement.
The longer it’s been, the worse your next heat will be.
By the time morning comes, you haven’t slept a wink. You sigh and force yourself out of your bed, shuffling to the kitchen to shove a cup of coffee down your throat. As you stir the sugar cubes into your favourite mug, your gaze happens to drift towards the calendar pinned up on your wall. On the square for that day, there is a large red circle with a little teacup scribbled in the middle.
“Shit,” You hiss for what feels like the millionth time in the last twelve hours. You stand there and stare at the doodle of the teacup, pondering whether you should still try to attend or call Larissa up and tell her you can’t make it to tea that day.
You know if you venture out of the house and your heat comes on, any alpha nearby will be able to smell you from a mile away. There may not be that many in Jericho, but even one would pose such a great danger to you… Never mind the werewolf students at Nevermore.
It would also be incredibly embarrassing to go into heat right in front of your best friend, and have her drive you home as you gush all over the seats of her car and whine in need. You shudder at the thought of what Larissa might think of you after something like that.
Before you can even make a proper decision on what to do, an odd feeling shoots through you. You feel your knees going weak, a sticky liquid clinging to your thighs and soaking your shorts. Another curse slips out as you clutch onto the edge of the counter, gasping at the coiling sensation twisting through your lower stomach. Your whole body shakes and you grab onto the counter for dear life.
Looks like you definitely won’t be seeing Larissa today.
You abandon your coffee, letting it go cold on the counter as you drag yourself back into your bedroom. It’s a difficult trip. Your legs threaten to give out beneath you the whole way there, your mind screaming at you to lay down with them spread and just hope an alpha happens to come along. Your brain has never felt so fuzzy before. You’ve never felt so stupid.
The moment you make it back to your room, you throw yourself into the nest. Your clothes are off in an instant. Flung carelessly in a heap in the corner. With trembling hands, you reach into your nightstand and grab a small purple bullet vibrator, fumbling around to switch it on. The trusty little toy has been used many times in the past while you thought of Laris— of… stuff. As soon as it makes contact with your aching clit you whine and arch off the bed, your body flooding with relief now that you finally have some friction. You bring yourself to the peak within minutes. And again. And again. And again…
But it’s not enough.
You shove your fingers inside while stimulating yourself with the bullet. Two isn’t enough. You add another. Not enough. You sob and writhe, your stupid mutt brain and your body aching for one thing. A quick glance at the alarm clock sitting on your nightstand shows the time Larissa should be waking up for the day. You know you should let her know while your brain still works somewhat.
You lick your dry lips and reach out for your phone. Reluctantly, you switch off the vibrator and set it to the side while you call Larissa. She answers almost immediately.
“Hello, darling,” Her sweet, sleepy voice comes through the other end of the phone. “Are you alright?”
Biting back the soft whine that bubbles up from your chest proves almost impossible. The sound of her voice sends another flash of desire through you, your essence coating your shaking thighs. “Larissa,” You whisper hoarsely. “I… I can’t… Make it… Today…”
Concern rings clear through her voice as she hears you panting. “Oh? Is everything alright, dear?”
“Yeah,” Your fingers gravitate towards your swollen clit, rubbing at it slowly as you listen to her speak. You gasp before you can bite back the sound, and clear your throat. “Yeah. Just… Don’t feel so good. I’ll see you next week?”
“Okay… Get better soon, alright? Do call me if you need anything.”
“I will,” The words come out in a breathless mumble before you hang up the phone and chuck it to the side. Just the memory of her voice has you growing wetter by the second, your fingers coated in your juices as you desperately try to satisfy yourself. Flashes of her face shoot through your mind, of her large hands and long fingers…
The vibrator is snatched up again in an instant.
You spend the next hour pleasing yourself without a break. Overstimulation makes your body jolt and twitch, but you can’t stop. You can’t. It just isn’t enough. Your mind is well and truly mush at this point, shown in the way your gaze drifts towards the door and for just a second, you consider opening the door and letting your scent waft out. Waiting for the first alpha to come and claim you.
For a moment, you seriously think about it. It would make your heat more bearable. Yes, said alpha might do horrible things to you, and you don’t really want that, but…
Before you can do anything stupid, the doorbell rings.
Sobbing in frustration, you set your vibrator down again. You force yourself up on shaky legs, not bothering to put pants on. You simply tug the oversized t-shirt down over yourself and shuffle to the front door, yanking it open.
Standing there in front of you is Larissa. Clutched in her hands is a wicker basket stuffed full of gifts. Teabags, cough drops, a couple of face masks, some flowers and a small teddy bear. “Hello,” Larissa greets you with a bright smile. “Since you aren’t well, I thought I would bring—” As soon as she catches sight of you, her words trail off. “...Oh.”
“Larissa,” You gasp. You have to grip onto the door frame to keep yourself upright. Your cheeks are flushed beyond belief, your eyes glazed over and distant. There is a thin layer of sweat on your skin, not to mention the wet patches on the back of your long shirt and your thighs. “I’m in heat.”
Her own cheeks flush when she hears those words. “I… I thought you didn’t go into heat. I thought you took pills.”
“I do. Pharmacy ran out.” Those are the only words you can manage before another tidal wave of need crashes through you and you whimper, sinking to the ground.
“Oh, my darling…” Larissa coos and invites herself inside. She closes and locks the door behind her, sets the gift basket down on the coffee table, then lifts you gently from the floor. She pulls her coat off and folds it over the back of the couch, then slips her feet out of her high heels. “Come on, my sweet. Let’s get you nice and comfortable, okay?”
You know there is no comfortable for you right now, but you don’t dare mention that to her when she is being so sweet. So attentive. You feel yourself getting more wet.
She scoops you up into her arms with ease and carries you to the bedroom. Her chest rumbles a little when she clears her throat upon seeing the vibrator carelessly left on your soaked sheets. Thankfully, she says nothing about it and carefully sets you down.
It kills you to have her so close. You just want to rut against her milky white thigh and have her praise you, you want those long fingers inside you, you want her mouth on you. You’ve loved her for decades, but you’ve never felt such intense need for her in all that time.
“Larissa,” You whimper again, but you have nothing to say. You just need her attention.
“Poor thing,” She whispers. She hesitates for half a second before reaching out to brush her fingertips over your slick thigh. “What can I do for you, dear?”
That simple touch over your thigh alone makes you jolt and gasp. “Don’t… ask me that,” You plead. “You won’t like the answer.”
Larissa leans closer, her larger frame looming over yours as she reaches her free hand out to cup your chin. Her fingers are so gentle as they tilt your head back, as though she is handling something as delicate as a porcelain doll. “What can I do for you, dear?” She repeats in a firm whisper.
You melt as you’re forced to stare up into her sapphire eyes. It feels like you could become nothing more than a puddle in a pile of blankets if she continues this. “I…”
“Tell me,” She urges. Keeping her gaze fixed on you, she dips her head and presses a sweet little kiss to your jaw. “Let me help you. Tell me how.”
As pathetic as it is, the very little resolve you had left snaps as soon as you feel her lips on your skin. “Fuck me,” You pant, raising your hips unabashedly.
“Are you sure?” She asks, her grip on your chin growing slightly firmer. “Are you sure, sweetheart? I’ll do that for you if that’s what you need, but I don’t want you to regret it later…”
“Larissa!” You groan before breaking out into a pathetic ramble. “I won’t regret it. I have loved you since we were teenagers, you’re the love of my life, there is literally nobody else in this world I would rather have help me with this. You must know that. You must have picked up on how much I love y—“
Before you can even finish that word, her lips are on yours.
Both of her hands move to pin your hips to the bed, forcing you to keep still instead of uselessly writhing around. The sheets beneath you become soaked almost to the point of ruin as she kisses you hard, her tongue brushing against yours desperately. You struggle to keep up with the searing heat of her kiss, but she doesn’t seem to mind as she takes complete control. Your hips fight against her hold, and as a result she pins you down harder.
“Riss,” You whine against her lips.
“I know, darling,” She shushes you, one of her hands drifting from your hip to between your legs. You gasp out as her fingers press against you, teasing between your folds. “I know. Give me a minute, okay?”
“Can’t,” A soft sob slips past your parted lips as you pant, the pure desire for her making your body shake. “Can’t. Need you to knot me.”
“You need to wait a moment for my powers to work,” As though trying to sate you for the moment, two of Larissa’s long fingers slip inside you while her thumb rubs at your clit. When you gasp and arch into the feeling, she coos softly and begins kissing along the column of your throat. “My poor puppy. So desperate, aren’t you?”
All you can do is whine, unable to decide whether you should arch into her kisses or her fingers. Another orgasm rips through you as she circles your clit, your body squeezing around her fingers as you gasp and squirm.
“That’s it,” Larissa praises, lightening her hold on your hip. “That’s it, sweetheart. Ride it out.”
You don’t need more convincing than that as your hips move wildly through it, taking everything those digits are giving you.
But you still need more. More sobs leave you and you stare up at her pleadingly. The ability to form words on your lips has left you entirely. All you can do is whimper like the pathetic little thing you are.
“I know, puppy,” She suddenly slips her fingers out of you, making you whine louder. She shushes you firmly and you fall silent in an instant. She straightens up to her full height and begins hitching her skirt up to her thighs, unclipping her stockings and pulling down her panties. Your whole body seizes up at the sight of the penis beneath her skirt, hard and already leaking. She seems to have taken size into account, knowing you will be stretched with the knot. It isn’t too long or thick, made perfectly to fit in your tight hole.
She’s so damn considerate you can’t believe it.
Larissa lays back against the mountain of pillows you have set up, giving herself a tantalising stroke before patting her lap. ���Come here, pup.”
You don’t hesitate, scrambling across the bed and setting yourself on one of her large thighs. You fight the urge to rut against it, knowing there is a much better reward waiting right there for you if you’re a good girl for her. She rests her hands on your hips and carefully guides you over here. The leaking tip of her cock rubs against your folds, teasing your clit.
“Are you positive you want this?” Larissa questions in a gentle whisper. “I don’t want to hurt you.”
“It won’t hurt,” You assure her and cup her cheek. A little smile twists at your lips as she leans into the touch and sighs. Even if she hadn't created her cock to fit you perfectly, you would be so soaked and opened up by this point she could fit inside easily without hurting you.
“Okay. Relax for me, dear,” She nods. She surges forward to capture your lips with her own again. Her big hands pull you closer, and as she distracts you by kissing you like a woman starved, she slips inside you. Both of you gasp in unison, the sensation unfamiliar to each of you. She groans as your tight pussy clenches around her, taking her time to sink deeper and deeper inside you.
That isn’t going to fly with you.
Without warning, you slam your hips down and sheathe her fully inside you. She moans in surprise and chokes out, “Darling—”
Finally getting what you’ve wanted this whole time, you don’t stop. You fuck yourself feverishly on top of her, taking her cock deep inside you over and over again. You keen and whimper as your lips trail down to her neck, sucking and biting at every inch of pale skin you can reach. Even as your mind starts to blur, you have to force yourself not to sink your tiny fangs into her throat and claim her.
“Darling, please, slow down—” Despite her pleading words, her hands continue to guide your hips at the brutal pace you have set for yourself. Her head tips back against the headboard, harsh pants leaving her parted lips every second. “Gods, you need to slow down—”
The stretch of her cock inside you is like pure heaven. To finally be filled, and have her doing it, is the most exhilarating thing you could ever dream of. Having her hit that spot deep inside you, hearing her moans and knowing you are the cause of them. You’re sure you’ve had this wet dream about a hundred times over the past couple of decades, but fuck none of those dreams could ever compare to the real thing.
“You want me to slow down?” You pant in her ear, willing to do whatever she wants even that means slowing down when you just want her to fuck your brains out.
“Gods, no,” She whispers and pulls you down as she starts meeting you halfway in quick thrusts.
You moan in sheer delight, melting against her chest as she fucks you hard. Like she’s been holding back these same feelings for just as long as you have, and now she finally gets to let them out. She holds you tight to her chest with one hand while the other squeezes your ass, kneading it appreciatively between her fingers.
“Riss, I—” You gasp as yet another climax starts to bubble up in the pit of your stomach. You can already feel this one is more intense than the others, and not just because you’re far beyond oversensitive at this point.
“That’s it,” Larissa coos, “come for me, darling. Let me feel you coming around me like a good pup.”
That is all the encouragement you need. This orgasm crashes through you like a tsunami as she pumps into you hard enough to fill the room with harsh slapping sounds. Your nails tear into her shoulders, sharpening into claws that rip right through her nice blazer. Clinging onto her for dear life, your whiny moans fill the room. All you can do is keep riding her and taking her with every deep thrust as your body jolts and writhes under her hold, your whole being on fire with the pleasure she gives you.
“You want mommy to knot you, sweetheart? Want me to fill up that sweet little pussy?” She pants. Your body tightens around her cock at the sound of those words and she giggles, gripping your hips and dragging you down even harder into every snap of her own. “I’ll take that as a yes.”
“Yes,” You pant, nuzzling your nose into her neck and becoming pliant in her hands, allowing her to do whatever she wants with you. “Please please please. Please knot me.”
Moments later, she gives you exactly what you want. She moans sweetly into your ear, her thrusts growing sloppy before she buries herself all the way inside you. She gasps and pants as her release pulses through you, the base of her cock swelling and keeping her stuck inside your pussy.
“You’re mine, now,” She whispers possessively into your ear. You’ve never heard her use that tone with you before, and it makes you shiver with another wave of need. If she wasn’t already stuck in you, you’d be riding her all over again just for that. She brushes some hair back from your sweaty face and kisses your temple. “You’re mine, aren’t you?”
“I’m yours,” You repeat in a brainless whisper. “I love you.”
“I love you, too, darling,” Larissa sighs, brushing her nose against your cheek. “I love you so, so much.”
She holds you for a long time, rubbing her hands up and down your back and praising you in a gentle voice. When she can finally pull out of you, she does so slowly, not wanting to hurt your sensitive hole. She curls a finger inside you to feel her own come filling you, and shivers at the feeling of her own stickiness on her fingertip.
“Just beautiful,” She murmurs and casts her blue eyes up to your face. “Do you feel better now, pup?”
“Yeah,” You nod, still a panting mess -- but a satisfied panting mess. “Thank you, Larissa. You… You didn’t have to do that.”
“I know. But I wanted to,” She scoops you up and holds you close to her chest, before slipping her long legs over the side of the bed and carrying you bridal style towards the bathroom. “Now, let’s get you cleaned up, hmm?”
“Larissa?”
“Yes, dear?”
“Did you really mean it?” You ask nervously as you peer up at her. “When you said you loved me?”
“Of course,” Larissa smiles down at you. Her eyes shine with sincerity, and you can tell there isn’t a hint of dishonesty in her words. “I’ve loved you for… a very long time, sweetheart.”
There is a flutter of hope deep in your stomach as you swallow down a lump in your throat. “You have?”
“Yes.”
You can’t even bring yourself to say all of the things you want to as she perches you on the edge of the bath and begins running the hot water. As the steam fills the bathroom and she pours scented liquid into the water, all you can do is stare at her. At the red lipstick smudged across her beautiful lips, at her flushed cheeks visible even beneath her pale foundation. Her hair is still neatly pinned into place, she still looks eternally graceful despite the slight dishevelled appearance around her. This woman loves you. This… this goddess, standing before you, loves you.
“Larissa?” You clear your throat.
“Yes?” She chuckles, clearly amused by your line of questioning.
“After my heat ends, would you like to go on a date with me?” You blurt out before you can talk yourself out of it.
Larissa watches you for a long moment, a smile twitching at her painted lips. Eventually she nods, reaching out to caress your face. “I would love that.”
She bathes you with a great deal of care, making sure to be delicate near your swollen clit and cum-filled hole. You soon convince her to join you as another rush of heat goes through you, and she knots you again in the bath. Then she has to wash you all over again. Over the course of the next three days, the two of you can’t stop fucking. A couple of decades of pent up desire makes itself known in the course of a few days. During some point in those three days, she creates a set of long canine teeth for herself, sinks them into your throat and marks you as her own. At the end of it, you’re both utterly exhausted, but you’re happy.
So fucking happy.
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cherrylovelycherry · 2 days
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𓂅new order. "tarte aux fraises and a pain au chocolat."
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Trios never work
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pairing. Aventurine x gn!reader x Dr ratio (poly) cw/genre. angst, some slow burn, anxiety vomiting, drink, being left out, slight addiction issue. synopsis. you couldn't stand to be left out any longer. full menu
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You watched the television disinterestedly, not paying attention to whatever is on that channel.
You, Aventurine and Ratio have been together for a little over a year now. At first, it was great, you three were inseparable and you did almost everything together. Moved in, split chores and expenses, that sort of thing.
That is, until you started being left out by them. You've always known they're closer to each other as they've been in love for time, but why did they even want you there if they'd just… forget about you?
Today is no different, unfortunately. You're stuck beside them, having to watch them cuddle and talk to each other while you just sit by yourself. Finally having enough, you stand from your spot, making your way towards the door.
"Is something wrong, my dear?" Aventurine asks as Ratio buries his face into his neck gently, his arms around his waist. Ratio looks up at you as well, his eyes taking in your expression, "You look upset. Is something bothering you?"
Your shoulders slump, eyes not quite meeting theirs. "Nothing." you reply softly, shifting uncomfortably. A slight lie.
Your throat tightens, "I was just going to go for a little walk," you murmur, a forced smile on your lips.
Ratio gives you a slightly skeptical look before sitting up to properly look at you, his arms still around Aventurine. "Why do you need a walk? Are you feeling unwell?" He asks.
"No, I just…" You stumble over your words, your voice growing shaky. "I just need a bit of air. Fresh air." They're so focused on you, eyes scanning you with hints of worry and curiosity, and yet—you still can't help but feel left out. It's the way they're still holding close to each other, not making any effort to reach out to you instead. It stings a bit.
There's a bit of a pause, the air between you turning a little tense as Ratio seems to think over your answer. He nods slowly, resting his chin on Aventurine’s shoulder.
"Alright then. Go on." He says, turning his head to press a kiss to Aventurine’s neck.
Your heart sinks a little at his words. It was so easy for him to just tell you to go. No offer to come with or ask if he should come with, nothing. It made the ache in your chest worse.
You nod silently, not trusting your voice. "I'll be going now. I'll be back soon." You murmur, slipping your shoes on and opening the door.
Aventurine opens his mouth to say something, but you’re already walking towards the front door. "Be careful on your walk," he calls out, "Don’t be out too late." You simply nod as you open the door, a small sigh of relief escaping your lips as you step outside.
You walk aimlessly, taking in the fresh air and the peaceful night sky. Still, your thoughts aren't very positive. Your mind keeps running back on how close they were, how lonely you felt being right next to them. It's exhausting, really, and it hurts more than you care to admit.
Both are left sitting together on the sofa, looking towards the door that you'd just walked out of. Aventurine hums gently. "They seemed a bit upset, don't you think?"
Ratio lets out a thoughtful hum, his expression a little grim. "Yeah…" He mutters, his eyes glued to the door. "I noticed too." His fingers begin to trace patterns on Aventurine’s waist, his touch almost absentminded as he thinks to himself.
"They've been acting a bit strange lately as well," he points out after a few moments of silence. "More down or distant, I think."
You walked leisurely through the cheerful and welcoming streets of Penacony. Which, despite being so, you did not find at all amusing.
It felt more, shall we say, boring.
You went up to the highest rooftops, seeing how pretty the lights looked and people enjoying themselves.
You felt jealous when you saw a couple taking pictures of each other. You shook your head, pushing those thoughts away.
To tell you the truth, the flat they bought here is only provisional since your boyfriends are on some kind of; mission? assignment?
You didn't really understand.
And of course, you being their partner, you're always with them wherever they go.
You sighed, crossing your arms a little as you leaned against the railings of the rooftop, looking down at the people below and the lights. The cool night air blew gently, gently brushing your hair with it.
You stayed there for a while, simply taking in the sights and sounds of the city around you. For a while it's peaceful and pleasant, a temporary distraction from the thoughts in your head. However, after a while, your mind drifts back to Ratio and Aventurine, and the ache in your chest returns.
Your mind drifts back to what's happening at home. Aventurine and Ratio. They're probably cuddling each other right now. Or they're watching a movie together. Or maybe they are kissing each other.
The thought makes your insides twist uncomfortably.
The entire place came to view before you as a chilly breeze passes you.
You let out a tiny shiver and cross your arms, hoping that it would help protect you from the cold air.
You check your phone. How long has it been since you left? Thirty minutes? An hour? Maybe two? Should you be getting back soon?
Above all, no messages or calls.
Just a few more minutes, you convince yourself. Just a few minutes more.
You let out a frustrated sigh, burying your head into your arms for a moment. The thoughts in your mind becoming louder with each passing minute.
This was unfair. They didn't even try to contact you. Not even a word.
However, you tried to cheer yourself up, thinking that maybe they had just fallen asleep. And that they were worried about you.
…Yeah, that must be it. They are probably sleeping right now. They are probably worried sick.
You try to convince yourself that they are worried just as much as you.
How can they not care? They love you, right? They care about you, right? You've been together for so long. There's no way they suddenly don't care anymore. Right?
You push yourself up, letting out a shaky breath.
You started walking again, with slow, leisurely steps.
Not to the flat, but to the bar you once stumbled upon while exploring.
Once you reached the bar, you push open the doors, stepping into the dimly lit room. There was a soft hum of music playing in the background, and several patrons were seated at the bar or lounging in the booths.
You took a quick glance around, taking in the cozy atmosphere of the place. It seemed like a nice place to relax and think.
You made your way over to the bar, taking a seat on one of the stools and leaning forward on the counter.
You didn't really realise how much time you spent there, at least you weren't falling or tripping over anything as you walked back to your temporary home.
However, you did have some alcohol in your veins.
You had fun, you met new people, including a Gallagher and a Siobhan.
And now you were slowly stumbling around the streets, your mind and body fuzzy from intoxication. The alcohol had definitely taken its toll on you, dulling your senses and affecting your judgment.
As you reached your temporary home, you fumbled with the keys, trying to find the right one to unlock the door. Finally, after a few failed attempts, you manage to open the door and stumble inside.
The living room was dimly lit, with just a few lamps lit around the room. Ratio and Aventurine were nowhere to be seen, and a quick glance around confirmed that they were probably in the bedroom.
You stumble over to the couch, feeling exhausted all of a sudden. You drop down onto the cushions with a soft thump, your body feeling heavy and tired.
You close your eyes for a moment, letting out a deep breath as you lean back against the couch. Your head was spinning slightly from the alcohol, but despite that, your mind suddenly became more clear.
All the thoughts you've been pushing down started flooding back in, and your chest clenches painfully as you’re reminded of why you went out in the first place.
Sighing deeply, you got up from the sofa, slowly taking off your shoes.
Then you made your way to the bedroom.
There you both were, sleeping face to face.
Without thinking too much and without changing your clothes, you climbed into bed, putting yourself in the middle of both of them, trying to make some space for yourself. Being careful not to wake them up.
Ratio stirred slightly as you settled yourself beside him, his arm wrapping around your waist unconsciously. Aventurine shifted closer to you, pressing his body against yours.
You were surrounded by them, their bodies warm and familiar.
For a while, you just lay there between them, feeling the rise and fall of their breaths, listening to the soft rustling of their limbs.
You felt a strange mix of comfort and pain at being here. Comforted by their presence, pained by how distant they felt.
You were tired, both physically and emotionally. Your body ached from the alcohol, and your heart ached with something else.
Lying there, between the two men you loved, you felt more alone than ever.
But, oh, the warmth they radiated made your eyes glaze over.
They were so close, yet so far away.
They clutched onto you, as if they needed you, but they didn't?
You couldn't help but watch them as they slept, Ratio's arm wrapped firmly around your waist, Aventurine's head resting on your shoulder.
Everything felt so familiar, yet so… distant.
Were you overthinking things? Were you making a big deal out of this?
They love you… right?
You watch as Ratio mumbled something in his sleep, his grip on your waist tightening slightly.
Your heart skipped a beat at the action, a strange mix of warmth and pain coursing through your body.
You knew you shouldn't be feeling like this. You shouldn't be doubting their love for you. They've been with you for so long, they've said they love you so many times.
But still, the doubts linger in your mind, whispering and gnawing at your heart.
Perhaps it was the alcohol talking, maybe it was just your own insecurities, but you suddenly felt the urge to cry.
Maybe it was just the alcohol.
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You opened your eyes slowly, almost as if you didn't want to wake up from your warm and peaceful sleep.
You found yourself lying on your back, your head resting on a firm yet comfy pillow. There was a comforting pressure on both sides of your waist, holding you carefully but firmly in place.
As you opened your eyes more, you realized that you weren't alone in bed. Ratio and Aventurine's bodies were pressed against yours from both sides, their limbs tangled with yours in a way that you were completely encircled between them.
Ratio's head was resting on your shoulder, his face nuzzled into the crook of your neck. His breath was warm and slow against your skin.
Aventurine's arm was draped over your waist, his hand resting firmly but gently on your hip. His forehead was pressed against your shoulder, his messy hair tickling your face.
"Morning…" Ratio mumbled groggily as you struggled in their grips, his arm tightening around your waist.
Aventurine stirred as well, nuzzling his face into your shoulder and mumbling something incoherent.
You could feel the warmth of their breath against your skin, the way their bodies were still pressed against yours with no signs of moving.
You groaned again, feeling like you were trapped in a warm, loving cage.
But despite the comfort, you felt frustrated.
"Stop…" You muttered, trying to push them off.
The two men responded with mumbled protests, their grips on your waist only getting tighter.
"Come on guys, you have work to do." You spoke, tiredly.
They both grumbled, starting to let go of you little by little.
"No offense," Ratio mumbled, his voice still thick with sleep, "But you smell like alcohol. Did you drink last night?" Aventurine opened his eyes slowly, looking up at you from his spot on your shoulder.
His voice was gentle but held a hint of concern. "Yeah, where'd you go?" He asked softly, rubbing at his eyes.
Great, just great.
You could already feel the hangover creeping in, and to add to your misery, there was a hint of concern in their voices.
You tried to brush it off, giving them a small smile.
"That doesn't matter…" You mumbled, avoiding both of their gazes. "What matters is you two have work to do."
Ratio sighed, letting his grip on you loosen completely. "We do have work, but we're more concerned about you," He said, propping himself up on his elbow.
Aventurine followed, propping himself up next to Ratio and looking at you with an expression that was a mix of concern and annoyance.
You suppressed the urge to roll your eyes. At the time they worried.
"I just needed some space." You replied, feeling like a child getting scolded, shifting slightly to try and sit up.
"Space, huh?" Aventurine said, his voice still slightly hoarse from sleep. "You could have at least told us where you were going."
Ratio chimed in as well, his voice carrying a hint of irritation. "Yeah, a warning would have been nice. We were worried about you."
This time you rolled your eyes quietly, but tried not to show them any obvious annoyance.
"I'm a grown adult," you retorted, a hint of defensiveness in your voice. "I can handle myself."
Ratio raised an eyebrow at you, his eyes searching your face. "That doesn't mean we're not going to worry." he said, his voice firm.
Aventurine sat up as well, propping himself up with one arm.
"It's not about you being able to handle yourself," he said, his voice a mixture of annoyance and concern. "We had no idea where you were."
Ratio nodded in agreement, running a hand through his messy hair.
"Oh. When I got home, they were sleeping peacefully." You said, with a hint of bitterness.
They both exchanged glances, the annoyance in their expressions not going unnoticed by you.
Ratio sighed, running a hand through his hair once more.
"That's not the point," he said, his voice still firm. "You were gone for hours. Do you have any idea how that feels?"
Aventurine joined in as well, his voice slightly more gentle than Ratio's. "We thought something might have happened to you."
You let out a heavy sigh, not saying anything.
Aventurine's voice still laced with concern. "You could have at least texted us."
Then he reached over and touched your arm gently. "It's just… we care about you. We want to know you're safe."
You bit back the urge to scoff at the hypocrisy.
"Yeah, well… I'm fine. See?" You gestured to yourself, trying to show that you were indeed in one piece.
You could feel the guilt creeping in, mixed with annoyance. Why did they suddenly care now?
"I just needed…", you paused, trying to find the right word to describe your current feelings. "space," you finished lamely.
Ratio and Aventurine exchanged a quick glance before looking back at you.
"Space from what?" Ratio asked, his tone slightly colder now.
You were starting to feel frustrated.
Why was it suddenly such a big deal? Why did they have to make such a big issue out of you needing some time alone?
"Space from…", you started to respond, but then you hesitated.
How could you possibly explain it to them without sounding needy or clingy?
You wanted to tell them what's been bothering you, but something held you back.
Maybe it was the guilt, maybe it was the fear of sounding like a needy child.
But before you could find the words, Ratio spoke up.
"Space from us, I presume." He said, his voice cool. "You needed space from us, didn't you?"
You felt a pang of guilt at Ratio's words, your heart clenching in your chest.
You tried to keep your expression neutral, but you could feel the emotions starting to bubble up inside of you.
"No," you lied, immediately. "It's not that."
Aventurine raised an eyebrow at your denial, his grip on your arm tightening slightly.
"Then what is it?" he asked, his voice carefully neutral.
You swallowed the lump in your throat.
"Ugh, please don't do this." You said grabbing your head. The hangover was starting to affect you harder, combining with the stress you felt now.
Ratio chuckled quietly, a sound that sent a shiver down your spine.
"Oh, so now we're being dramatic, huh?" he said, a hint of sarcasm in his voice.
Aventurine spoke up as well, his voice tinged with irritation. "We're not doing anything, we're just trying to understand what's going on with you."
Ratio leaned back, propping himself up against the headboard.
"You've been acting different lately," he said, his gaze focused on you. "More distant, less responsive."
You wanted to protest, to deny their accusations, but the words got stuck in your throat. They were right, and you knew they were right.
But you couldn't tell them why. Not yet, at least.
"I've just… been feeling a bit stressed," you replied vaguely, avoiding their gazes.
"Come on, don't give us that bullshit."
At Aventurine's words, your eyes widened slightly. He normally didn't say that kind of thing.
However, that didn't stop you from feeling uncomfortable and with a taste of pure bitterness in your mouth.
You proceeded to let out an unfunny laugh, as you got out of bed.
"My head hurts too much for this." You said, with some coldness in your tone as you left the room.
"You two should already be continuing with your work. That's why both came here." You raised your voice so they could hear you since you were heading towards the kitchen.
As they heard your words, Ratio and Aventurine exchanged a quick glance.
Ratio ran a hand through his hair, letting out a sigh.
"They are so damn… infuriating," he muttered, his annoyance evident.
Aventurine nodded, his expression mirrored Ratio's frustration. "I don't even know what's going on with them," he replied, running a hand over his face. "They are been acting weird for days now."
You could hear them both stirring in the bedroom, their voices lowered, but you knew they were talking about you.
"Probably bad things.", you thought.
You rubbed your temples as you entered the kitchen, the lights feeling brighter and only making your migraine worse.
You rummaged through the cabinets, looking for a painkiller or something, when you heard footsteps behind you.
"You shouldn't mix alcohol with pain killers, y'know," Ratio's voice was low and calm, but there was an edge to it.
You paused what you were doing, looking over your shoulder at him.
Ratio's face was set in a frown, and Aventurine's expression was stern.
He leaned against the doorframe, his arms crossed over his chest, his expression unreadable.
You didn't respond, continuing to rummage through the cabinets in search of pain medication.
Ratio watched you silently for a moment, his eyes studying your every move.
"You're being stubborn," he said after a while, his voice neutral yet laced with annoyance.
"Thanks." You responded dryly, in a murmur.
Ratio rolled his eyes at your response, his annoyance growing visible.
"You know that's not what I meant," he sighed, running a hand through his hair once more.
It was becoming a tic of his.
Aventurine spoke up as well, his voice a bit calmer than Ratio's.
"You're acting like a child." He said, crossing his arms over his chest as well.
Oh, Aeons.
You felt frustrated by their words and by the pain in your head.
You slammed the cabinet shut with more force than necessary and turned to face them.
"Both should stop wasting time here and concentrate on your work." You spat, rubbing your head with both hands, you felt like it was going to explode at any moment.
Ratio raised an eyebrow at your sudden outburst, his expression slightly surprised.
"And there it is," he said, his voice tinged with sarcasm. "The real Y/N, finally decided to show up."
Aventurine watched you intently, his eyes scanning your face.
"Oh, because we're wasting time by trying to check on your well-being?" he said, his voice dripping with sarcasm.
Aventurine stayed silent, simply observing your interaction with Ratio. He was probably trying to figure out the best way to handle the situation.
Ratio took a couple steps closer to you, his gaze not leaving yours.
"You should stop being so goddamn stubborn and just talk to us." He said, his annoyance growing more noticeable.
Oh no. You started to feel the sudden urge to vomit. That was bad.
Your expression went from irritated to slightly dizzy.
"Guys, stop it, we can continue later." You said, as you grabbed onto the kitchen counter.
The nausea was the effect of the hangover and excessive stress you were feeling now.
Ratio immediately realized something was wrong as he noticed your expression changing. His annoyance was quickly replaced by concern.
"Y/N?" he asked, taking another step towards you, his eyes watching your hand clutching the counter.
Aventurine also moved closer, his gaze shifting between you and Ratio. "Are you okay?" he asked, his voice laced with worry.
You swallowed hard, trying to suppress the nausea that was rising in your stomach. "I'm fine," you said weakly, but your trembling voice betrayed your words.
"Maybe I need—" Your words were cut off by the urgent need to throw up, causing you to cover your mouth, running towards the bathroom.
Ratio and Aventurine exchanged a quick glance before following hot on your heels. They hurried into the bathroom, just in time to see you hunched over the toilet, vomiting.
Ratio gently placed a hand on your back, rubbing soothing circles as you retched.
Aventurine appeared again in the doorway with a glass of water in hand.
"Here," Ratio said, grabbing the water from Aventurine and handing it to you. "Drink slowly."
You gripped the glass of water with trembling fingers, taking a few small sips as Ratio instructed. The cool liquid helped to soothe your burning throat.
After a while, your vomiting subsided, leaving you feeling even more weak and tired than before. You slumped back against Ratio, feeling completely drained and miserable.
"Sorry," you whispered, your voice raspy and weak.
Ratio shook his head, his hand still rubbing slow circles on your back. "Don't apologize," he said softly.
By the time you turned to look at Aventurine, he was gone.
You did the same to see Ratio who was next to you, he wasn't there either.
Oh, right. They were never here with you, they stayed in the kitchen. You never drank water, you never had your back rubbed.
You really wondered what the hell was wrong with you.
You stood up heavily from the ground, rinsing your mouth with the water from the tap, and flushing the toilet. Then with slow steps you returned to the bedroom.
You didn't care to know if they were still in the apartment.
You hated it when your body reacted to your stress.
They were engaged in hushed whispers, their voices too low for you to hear. They stayed in the kitchen, just like you thought.
When they saw you walk in the bedroom, they immediately stopped talking and turned to look at you.
Ratio's expression was a mix of concern and annoyance, his arms crossed over his chest. Aventurine, on the other hand, had a troubled look on his face, his brows furrowed in thought.
At least you would feel calm being alone in the apartment. Without showing each other affection every minute, in front of you, without giving you anything like that.
You climbed into bed, covering yourself with the covers, trying to relax.
A few minutes passed before Aventurine spoke out loud.
"Uhm, we're leaving, we'll be back soon." He said.
You heard the door open and close.
You were glad to hear the sound of the door closing behind, signaling that they were leaving. At least you could finally have some peace and quiet.
You closed your eyes and attempted to fall asleep, hoping to get some rest and recover from the hangover and the previous encounter.
You rested a little more, after a few hours you got up and tried to distract yourself.
You watched television, you played games on your phone, you ate the odd snack. That is until it got later.
While you were on the couch, you heard the door open. They had returned.
Ratio and Aventurine walked through the door, their expressions serious.
Aven, as usual, was the first to speak up. "Hey."
Hey, is that all they could say? It was as if they didn't realize that they were being insensitive.
But suddenly you were doing it too, so you ignored it.
Ratio spoke up as well, his expression slightly softer. "How are you feeling?"
You shrugged, not meeting their gaze. "Good." You replied coldly, trying to hide your annoyance.
Aventurine gave you a quick glance before sighing. "We brought food." He said, holding up a bag containing takeout food.
"Oh, uhm." You blurted out, feeling uncomfortable.
"Thank you, but I'm not very hungry." You got up from the couch, leaving the television on, while you stretched.
"I'm going out for a while again." You said, walking into the bedroom, and changing out of your sleepwear into something simple.
Ratio and Aventurine exchanged a quick glance as you left to change. They were both aware of the tension in the air and your mood.
Ratio let out a sigh.
"This is hopeless," he muttered, a hint of irritation in his voice.
Aventurine looked at Ratio, understanding his frustration.
"We just have to keep trying," he replied, though his voice had a tinge of uncertainty.
You left the room, going to put on your shoes, passing them.
"Well, I'll be right back." You said calmly.
Ratio couldn't help but roll his eyes at your words.
"Yeah, we'll see about that." He muttered under his breath. Aventurine gave him a stern look, silently warning him not to push things further. They both knew that this situation was quickly becoming a headache for all three of you.
You finished putting your shoes on and grabbed your keys, leaving the house without saying another word.
They watched as you closed the door behind you. The silence in the apartment became thick and uncomfortable. The television was on, being the only sound that could be heard.
This type of situation happened, once, twice, three times. And more.
A little routine of yours, like you try not to be in the apartment when they are there too.
Waking up tired and dizzy, saying cold and boring words between the three of them, waiting for hours for them to return and once they did, you went to the bar, returning hours later, tripping over things in the apartment, falling asleep on the couch or in bed.
And it was repeated, again.
Again, and again, and again, and again.
The cycle seemed endless, caught in a loop that seemed impossible to break.
Ratio and Aventurine were frustrated, frustrated by the walls you had built around yourself and the communication issues that prevented you from opening up.
They wanted to help you, but they didn't know how to approach the situation. They couldn't help but feel like they were doing something wrong.
But no, that couldn't be, they knew they weren't doing anything wrong. Right?
Ratio and Aventurine sat in silence for a while, both lost in thought. They knew they needed to address the situation, but it was hard, especially since you were avoiding them.
"I hate this," Ratio finally spoke up, breaking the silence. "I hate that they are behaving like this."
Aventurine nodded, a frustrated expression on his face. "I know." He said, holding Ratio's hand.
It was already nearing midnight, and there was no sign of you returning home, again.
The atmosphere was thick with tension and frustration. They had been talking about you, again.
This time they would wait for you, they were not going to rest until they could talk to you once and for all and stop making you avoid the conversation.
"I feel like we're going around in circles." Ratio spoke up again. "Every time we try to talk to them, they shuts us out. It's like they are not even trying."
Aventurine squeezed Ratio's hand, trying to comfort him. "There must be a reason why they are acting like this," he said, although even he seemed doubtful.
Ratio let out a bitter laugh. "Is there? Because I can't think of one that makes sense."
They waited, and waited, and waited.
Time dragged on slowly, tick, tock, tick, tock, the clock seemed to move slower every second.
They waited with anticipation and expectation, sitting motionless on the couch, their eyes fixed on the front door.
And then, finally, they heard the jingle of keys, the sound of the door opening, and your footsteps entering.
Ratio and Aventurine immediately sat up straight, turning to look at you as you stepped inside.
As a matter of course, you were drunk.
Ratio and Aventurine couldn't help but notice the way you swayed slightly as you walked, a slight flush on your cheeks betraying your intoxication.
Ratio let out a frustrated sigh, running a hand through his hair as he looked at you. "Where have you been all night?" he asked, his voice betraying his annoyance.
Aventurine, sensing the tension in the room, stayed silent but placed a calming hand on Ratio's arm, hoping to soothe the situation.
"Having fun." You said, smiling a little.
Ratio's eyes narrowed at your response. "Having fun? Is that what you call it? Drinking yourself into oblivion every day?"
Aventurine shot Ratio a look, silently urging him to calm down. Him speaking this time.
"We're worried about you, you know that?" he continued, his voice rising. "We—"
"Hah, like you said—don't give me that bullshit." Your voice came out almost with spit words.
Your mind was fuzzy.
Ratio clenched his fists, his irritation growing. "We're not giving you bullshit. We care about you, damnit."
You chuckled bitterly, your words slurring slightly. "Yeah, I'm sure you care, but only when it suits you both."
Ratio's eyes widened at your response, his anger rising. "Excuse me?"
"We're the ones who should be getting pissed off here. You're the one who's been acting like a complete mess."
Aventurine tried to interject again. "Ratio, this isn't—"
But Ratio wasn't having it. "No, Aven. They needs to hear this." He turned back to you. "You've been avoiding us, avoiding everything, and for what? So you can go get drunk every night?"
"Yeah, exactly. Because being around you two is so damn great." You retorted, sarcasm dripping from your tone.
Ratio's expression darkened even further, his next words cutting through the air like a dagger.
"Oh, is that right? I guess being with us is so unbearable that you have to go out and get drunk every night instead of staying here and facing your own damn problems."
Your eyes narrowed at Ratio's words, your own anger starting to boil over.
"Yeah, because it's better than dealing with your bullshit all the time."
Ratio let out a bitter laugh. "Bullshit? You think we're bullshitting you? We're the ones who've been putting up with your crap, your avoiding us, your reckless behavior."
Your eyes widened at Ratio's harsh words, hurt flashing across your face.
"You have no idea what you're talking about," you said angrily, your voice shaking. "You have no idea how I feel."
Ratio scoffed, his irritation reaching a boiling point. "Oh, really? Then why don't you enlighten us? Why do you feel the need to drink every night?"
"Seriously, you can tell us." Aventurine said, his brow now furrowed, a mix of worry and frustration on his face.
You let out a scoff, your words coming out in a rush. "And what, you want me to spill my heart out to you two, like it's some kind of therapy session? I didn't realize I was dealing with a couple of psychologists here."
Ratio let out a bitter laugh. "Well, it's not like you're giving us anything else to work with. You just keep drinking yourself into oblivion every night, avoiding us, avoiding any kind of conversation."
You clenched your fists, your frustration turning into anger. "Oh, aren't both of you so perfect?"
Ratio's expression hardened. "Don't try to turn this around on us. We never said we were perfect, but at least we're trying to communicate and have a conversation. You're the one who's refusing to listen or talk to us."
Aventurine interjected, his voice laced with concern. "Y/N, please. We just want to help you. We don't—"
"Help me?" You snapped, again cutting Aventurine off.
"Hey, watch your tone." Ratio said, at the shout you gave to Aventurine.
"Hah, just that.", You thought, looking at them with anger and irritation.
Your anger flared, your words coming out in a frustrated hiss. "Oh, and I'm supposed to believe that you really want to help me? Please. You're both probably just worried that I'm gonna ruin your perfect little lives."
Ratio's eyes widened at your accusation, stung by your words. "Is that really what you think of us? That we only care about ourselves?"
Aventurine spoke up again, his voice pleading. "No, that's not true at all. We care about you. We care about us."
"Yeah, right." You replied bitterly, crossing your arms.
Ratio's face twisted into a scowl. "We're just as messed up as you are. We have our own issues and problems to deal with. We don't need you acting like this, avoiding us, drinking excessively—"
"Yeah, because I'm the ONLY ONE who's being problematic, right?" You interrupted, sarcasm lacing your words. "Just because I don't sit next to both of you and start to fucking endure how both are so loving and happy between ONLY the two of you, I'm wrong here, huh?"
Ratio's jaw clenched tightly, his temper rising at your accusations.
"That's bullshit and you know it. We're a team, a relationship. We're supposed to be in this together, working through things together."
You felt the growing lump in your throat. "Fuck, no. We're not a team anymore, it's just you being a fucking couple."
You clenched your fists, trying to calm the wave of emotions that was washing over you.
Ratio's expression hardened at your words, his own emotions warring with his irritation.
"What the hell do you mean we're not a team anymore? We're still together, we're still—"
You cut him off, your voice trembling with anger and hurt. "No, we're not. Not really. Not when you both spend all your time together, sharing moments, laughing, even in sex."
Ratio's eyes widened at your words, hurt evident on his face.
"Is that really what you think?" he asked, his voice low. "That we're just a couple and that you're not a part of us anymore?"
Aventurine's face fell, his expression pained. "No, that's not true. You're just as much a part of this relationship as we are."
"I'm just a third wheel," you said bitterly. "That's what I've always been."
Even though your words affected them, Ratio couldn't help but get more frustrated.
"And whose fault is that, huh? Whose fault is it that you keep pushing us away, that you keep avoiding us, that you keep getting drunk every damn night instead of dealing with the problem?"
You clenched your fists even tighter, your nails digging into your palms.
"Oh, so now it's MY fault, huh? It's MY fault that I feel left out, ignored, and sidelined?"
You didn't know if you wanted to laugh or cry at what he was saying.
"Yeah…maybe it's my fault." You spoke again, feeling your eyes sting. At any moment they would be filled with tears.
"It's my damn fault that both have sex secretly from me, it's my fault that both knew each other before, it's my fault that both are more affectionate with each other, it's my damn fault that both know each other much more than you two know me!"
And that's it, with that, your voice cut off. Being unable to see both men's faces as tears clouded your vision.
Ratio's expression softened at the sight of your tears, his irritation momentarily forgotten.
It was true, he and Aventurine had been more affectionate with each other lately. But that wasn't because they didn't care about you, it was just…
No, there really were no words to deny or defend the accusations.
He sighed, trying to find the words to explain themselves. "Look, we didn't mean for it to be like that. It just happened."
Aventurine spoke up, his voice soft. "We never wanted you to feel left out or ignored. We care about you, we really do."
Ratio stepped closer as well, his expression conflicted between anger and concern. "Y/N, we never wanted you to feel left out. That was never our intention."
But your emotions were running high.
"Then what was your intention, huh? To make me feel like an outsider in my own relationship?"
They both stayed silent, not knowing how to respond to that.
"That is what I thought." You blurted out, in frustration.
Ratio pinched the bridge of his nose, his expression shifting to frustration and guilt.
"That's not what we wanted, that's never what we wanted."
You let out a bitter, unfunny laugh, "Oh, shut it."
You were shaking, you really wanted to just not feel like that.
"It's always you two. Always Aventurine and Ratio. Always Kakavasha and Veritas."
"Fuck all that." You spat, as your tears began to come out like waterfalls.
"Where the hell was I there?" You sobbed, covering your face with both hands. You felt humiliated to be seen crying like that.
"I hate it so much." You mumbled, without a hint of stopping your crying.
Ratio's heart ached at the sight of your tears, realizing the depth of your emotional pain.
Aventurine stood beside him, visibly upset as well.
"Y/N, please…" He tried to reach out to you, his hand hovering in the air.
But you flinched away from his touch, your body shrinking back as more tears streamed down your face.
"Don't." You warned, your voice choked with sobs. "Don't touch me."
Ratio and Aventurine stood there, feeling helpless as they watched you cry.
"We never wanted to make you feel like this."
"You're lying." You retorted, your voice raw from crying.
Aventurine shook his head, his expression pleading. "No, that's not true. We love you, we truly do."
Ratio's hands were shaking slightly, torn between wanting to comfort you and respecting your wish not to be touched.
Aventurine looked like he was on the verge of tears as well, his shoulders slumped with guilt.
Ratio said softly. "We never meant for it to be this way."
But your words cut through the air between you all.
"Then why did it happen?" You asked, your voice laced with pain and anguish.
Ratio's jaw clenched as he struggled to find the words to explain.
"It just…happened." He said weakly. "We got caught up in our own relationship and didn't realize that we were neglecting you."
Aventurine nodded alongside him. "We messed up. We should have paid more attention to you, made more of an effort to include you in our activities."
Ratio winced, knowing how hollow those words sounded.
"But just because we made a mistake doesn't mean we don't care about you." Ratio was quick to add.
You let out a bitter chuckle through sniffles and sobs.
"…That 'mistake' is 3 fucking years old." You spoke in a muffled manner. Breathing heavily.
How they left you aside is not recent, it had been years. The bomb was accumulating until today it exploded.
The reality of the situation hit Ratio and Aventurine hard.
Three years. Three years of ignoring your emotions and needs. Three years of putting their own relationship before you, despite claiming that you were all equal in this relationship.
Both felt a pang of guilt and shame in their chest. How could they have let it go on for so long without realizing the harm they were causing you?
Aventurine looked equally devastated, his face pale and his eyes downcast.
"We…we never realized…" He began, his voice choked with emotion.
Ratio, seeing Aventurine's almost tearful state, rubbed his back slowly.
Ratio's head was spinning, trying to figure out how it had come to this. They had always thought that they were in a healthy and happy relationship. But clearly, they had failed to consider the impact their actions were having on you.
He looked at you, still crying and curled up on yourself. The guilt and remorse gnawed at his insides. He and Aventurine had been fools, blinded by their own selfishness and neglectful behavior.
Aventurine spoke up suddenly, his voice shaky. "Why didn't you say anything? Why didn't you tell us how you felt?"
Ratio's eyes widened slightly. That was a fair question. Why hadn't you spoken up before now?
But he immediately realized the answer to that question. If you had tried to bring it up, how would they have reacted? Would they have dismissed your feelings, or maybe gotten defensive?
With your breath coming in ragged gasps, your body trying to catch the air lost through crying, you let out slight hiccups.
With one of your hands you wiped your wet cheeks.
Your head was beginning to ache from the alcohol in your veins and the dehydration from crying.
"Ah…it doesn't really matter anymore." You said, your voice hoarse.
And you were right, there was no point in questioning why, if you'd finished getting everything out that you'd been holding in for so long.
You felt their worried and trembling looks, you felt ashamed and humiliated for having exploded in such a way, your sobs had faded into sniffles and deep breathing.
They both listened to your words with a sinking feeling in their stomachs. Your voice was hoarse and strained, but the message was clear: you'd given up.
You stretched slightly in your seat, starting to walk towards the bedroom.
You wanted to simply rest from it all.
"I'm going to go to sleep now." You said, passing by both of their sides.
The conversation, or rather argument, had not ended well and just expressing yourself left you completely exhausted.
They both knew that they hadn't solved anything, that they'd done nothing more than reveal just how distant they had become from you.
Before you disappeared from his sight, Aven called out to you, making you turn around for a while.
"We love you, sweetheart."
That simple phrase made you let out a silent sigh.
As much as you wanted to smile at least a little, it only came out as a grimace.
"Uhm…okay, I guess." You said, not really feeling his words.
They felt totally empty.
You turned your head again, walking into the bedroom. Your mind was spinning, your thoughts were varying, the same with your feelings, they were all jumbled.
But at least one thing was clear to you; trios never work and never will.
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galene-gothic · 2 days
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𝖶𝗋𝗂𝗍𝗍𝖾𝗇 𝗂𝗇 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝗁𝖾𝖺𝗋𝗍
୧ ‧₊˚ ⋅* ‧₊ Hi snowies, I’m back with another Barbie princess and the pauper themed reading !! I hope this reading found you in good health and that you like it, every reblog is appreciated and thank you for everything :) ˖♡ ˎˊ˗ ꒰ 🐇 ꒱
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︎︎⊹ ! 🪡︎ Pile 1 ꒱
꒰ Where are you free to begin again and believe ? ꒱
You’ve experienced an ending (possibly even multiple ones) that were very heavy. It was the kind of ending (or a string of them) that came with a lot of pain and hurt but was inevitable, something that could simply not be saved. For many of you a lot of backstabbing and betrayal took place, possibly people bitching too. It could have very well been a whole group of people disliking you or turning against you. I’m strongly getting that you’ve often experienced people not liking you for any reason at all. For many of you, all of this took place at the same time (betrayal, people disliking you for no reason, etc.) You’ve lost a lot or at least feel a strong sense of loss (or have had to feel that way at some point). You have many deep wounds and right now, life seems to be more peaceful for you. However, you’re worn out, tired and disappointed. I need to give you a virtual pat on the back for the way you seem to be handling the situation though. You let things end even though you had to reach the lowest possible point mentally. You allowed yourself time and space to heal and recover. You have always been the type to try your best so you were just like “nothing more can be done now, I tried my best”. Right now, you’re really focused on yourself and your own internal values. Your energy is still not the most harmonious but the way you’re dealing with things seems to make it all harmonious again. You have released many fears and are still doing so. ‘I look to you’ by Whitney Houston is coming through for some reason. You’ve reached a point where you have a harder time trusting people and doubt loyalty but it doesn’t seem to be negative, obviously there are days when the voices do get to you but you’re able to tame them. It’s just that going forward, you want to choose and do what’s best for you. You’re still struggling emotionally but it’s only so that you can do even better going forward and yes, you have dealt with this situation really well. You should be proud of yourself because some of us wouldn’t have been able to think straight if we were in your place. You seem to know that whatever you lost wasn’t that great to begin with and every loss of yours has only led to more wins but one thing that I need to make you aware of is that everyone who lost you has received the biggest L, even if at that time, they were having the time of their lives, you’ve clearly won. You’re free to begin again. What has passed has passed. You’re free to, in fact, you have every right to believe that being in your life and someone having you in their life is a privilege. You’re free to believe that trust needs to be earned. You’re free to believe that you’ve had a string of bad connections and that their words, and actions hurt you so you have every right to feel bad and not want anything to with them. You’re free to believe that you don’t have to fully forgive someone to move on. You’re free to stand up for yourself and not feel bad for doing so. Even if you made a mistake, if someone is going overboard with punishing you by treating you shitty and disrespecting you, you have every right to stand up for yourself as long as you’re still aware of what you did wrong and are holding yourself accountable instead of acting as though you’ve never hurt a fly. You’ve walked away and surrendered which is the best that you could have done, I’m proud of you. You’re free to not want to communicate maturely with those who refused to communicate maturely with you in the past. You’ve always had a personality where you don’t mind compromising for those you love and because it comes so naturally to you, you don’t even bother to voice it out.
However, just because you don’t talk the talk, instead you just walk the walk, people act as though your sacrifices were not big. You’re allowed to have resentments against people as long as you don’t burden yourself. You’re free to find peace in the fact that you’re a great and loving person who has never minded giving up their ego for a greater good, that you’ve always looked at yourself and your loved ones as a team and that’s not a bad quality, you just didn’t know better and had people who weren’t the same as you, around yourself and that’s okay. You’re free to believe and know that you were not being difficult or trying to pick fights, you were trying to fix things because you really cared and wanted to give, and do your best. You’re free to forgive yourself for not voicing out your needs sooner. You’re free to not want to forgive some people, you’re free to deny that you weren’t even involved with certain people if that’s what brings you peace. Remember that the past doesn’t even exist, no one can narrate and decide your story except you, and the truth is, people cannot exist in your reality unless you let them ;). You’re free to not have empathy for those who didn’t have empathy for you. You’re free to be rude and standoffish with those who deserve it. You’re free to believe that it’s okay for people to leave such a bitter taste in your mouth that you wouldn’t want to help them even if they were living out their last few days with a beating heart. You’re allowed to believe that you’re not always the bad person, no matter how much you’ve been villainised, you’ve always tried to watch your actions and when you did make mistakes, you always tried to make up for them, and usually, you didn’t even do anything wrong. You’ve often had people hate you because they’re envious of and feel inferior to you in some way but then they try to make it seem as though it’s your mistakes and actions that they hate you for. You’ve had people trying to isolate you, you’ve had people telling mutuals not to talk to you, you’ve had people trying to turn people against you just for the thrill of putting you down because it’s fun to try to bring down someone who they feel inferior to, it makes them feel superior, watching you question yourself but what they don’t seem to know is that you question yourself to better yourself because you don’t view mistakes as unforgivable sins, you want to take accountability, make amends, do whatever you can to repair the damage that you may have done and do better in the future instead of drowning in self guilt like they want you to 😭. Even if you did temporarily fall into self guilt, you managed to come right out and you always will. You’re free to believe that you’re a good person, you’re free to have faith in your own greatness and embrace your mistakes in a way where you put it all behind yourself, understand that however others have treated you has been wrong as well. You’re free to believe that you’re a good person no matter how many unethical things you may have done, no matter how much others have tried to villainise you. You’re allowed to be cold to those who used your mistakes to try to get you to break. If I was you, I would avoid doing anything that I could possibly regret doing in the future. You’re free to understand that many of your past actions have been shitty but those who jumped to try and knock you down to a peg were not saints either. If they did have a problem with what you did, they would discuss your actions, not your character, they just had a problem with you, and they would sure as hell not gang up against and isolate you. You are allowed to leave your past behind (including any of the actions that you’re not proud of) and do better in the future. Just remember, you’re always free to begin again and you’re always free to believe. When you find the place where your heart belongs, you’ll never leave.
꒰ What’s the destiny that’s written in your heart ? ꒱
The destiny that’s written in your heart is to be seen. Many of you are interested in lifestyles that bring about a lot of eyes on you (possibly being a public figure). I don’t even think that you need to be known on a wide scale, it’s about the expression and success for you. You want to be able to make people happy and help them remain optimistic during hard times. You’re also supposed to be very generous. I just heard that the destiny that’s written in your heart is to belong to everyone, not in a negative way but in a way where everyone has a piece of the good deeds you’ve done inside their hearts and so you belong to them in some capacity. You’re supposed to have a lot of personal integrity and just be an abundant person overall. Even if you are not a public figure or an aspiring one, you’re supposed to be the light in many people’s lives. Due to how you’re going to belong to everyone, you’re also going to have to prioritise your alone time. To you, the time that you spend by yourself is going to be very precious. There are going to be people who are going to want to come into your life in order to dim your light and you’re going to have to find peace in life again and again. YES, PEOPLE ARE GOING TO ACTIVELY TRY TO ADD LACK OF PEACE INTO YOUR LIFE 😍. You’re meant to grow to be someone who’s not really that problematic. Which is why, you may have to step out of character a lot as a teen and early adult, you’ll have to learn how to stay firm in wanting to protect your peace and keep your character strong. Your destiny is to remain firm in your karma and have a strong sense of integrity. You’re supposed to learn how to protect your energy because you will have a lifestyle where you sort of belong to everyone but that’s not realistic, there are only certain people who deserve you in their lives, so you’ll have to learn how to balance it all. Karma is really big in your spread. You’re someone who’s experienced karma, often immediately. You’re supposed to learn many life lessons and lead a life of integrity. Your destiny if you manage to harness it, is to attain status and power but you’ll consistently have to work on balancing different aspects of your life (because you’re going to have it all). I hope that you enjoyed the reading and that it resonated, much love and take care, until next time 💗.
︎︎⊹ ! 🪡︎ Pile 2 ꒱
꒰ Where are you free to begin again and believe ? ꒱
Right away, you could be coming from pile 1. If not, much like the previous pile, you’ve undergone an ending too. Yes, this is in fact the ending of whatever situation or situations that took place but that’s the good news, that’s what you’re free to begin from again. When you’re at the lowest, the only place to go to is upwards ;). Who had potato and egg curry/likes it? Maybe, someone here is going to cook it or the dish holds some significance to you? It just randomly came through, doesn’t have to resonate for everyone. The ending doesn’t seem to be singular honestly, I feel like there was a whole cycle of multiple endings that took place but with many delays. If you ever find yourself feeling guilty about not getting over it or feel as though it’s your fault because you delayed these cycles, please be kinder to yourself. When things end, you’re left empty but what happens when a container is left empty? It gives room for new stuff to fill up that space. It’s important for you to not dwell on this ending - the guilt of not ending it sooner, wishing it had never ended, the emptiness you feel, etc. You’re free to begin from everything you’ve ever known because there is so much more in the future, in fact, even in the present itself for you to know. If you’re refusing to end a cycle, you’re only making it harder on yourself, I hope that you’ll be able to start again, no matter how much time it may take. Some of you feel guilty towards yourself because you know that you’re over it, you’re just not letting yourself let go completely. It’s become a habit to think about it, feel certain emotions when you reminisce so it feels foreign for you to move on and feel peace. Even if you’re still emotionally attached to the past, make the conscious effort to move forward. Please remember “no closure is a closure”. No matter how stagnant you feel or have felt, no matter how long you’ve felt it for, no matter how familiar the feeling is to you, you’re free to get out of this energy. Even if you feel as though you were unable to make the most out of your potential so far, even if you feel as though you haven’t achieved much, no matter how disappointed you’ve felt in yourself, don’t burden yourself with such feelings. You’re free to move on and achieve a lot going forward. “Though you may not know where your gifts may lead and it may not show in the start, when you live your dream, you’ll find destiny is written in your heart.” Why are you so concerned about everyone? Why do you try to make things right with your actions even if you aren’t interested in maintaining certain connections? It’s because you’ve achieved a lot when it comes to character. If you feel misunderstood even though you’ve done a lot for others without even talking about it because that’s just you, if you felt betrayed, it’s them, not you. Fight against their opinions, they just dislike how you stand for the things that wish they stood for, they also dislike how you are the way they wish to be in some capacity.
Continue soaring forward with courage, resilience and conviction. You’re allowed to want what you want without always having to adjust to other people’s needs, desires, personalities, lifestyles and actions. Even if you may feel like you’ve betrayed yourself in the past, know that you were living by your truth of loving and keeping your actions in check, you’re always free to begin again and live more truthfully to yourself. In fact, now you know a lot more than you did back then, isn’t that in itself a blessing? Never let anyone influence you and your approach to interpersonal connections. You’re likely a more long term kinda person due to how much you pour into everything and everyone. You’re free to believe that you’re a great person even if you aren’t breaking your leg to please others. At this point, you likely know well enough about that because you seem to have a pretty strong sense of self or are developing it (and have been making good progress with it). You’re free to stand up for yourself and your beliefs. It’s time to be your most honest and authentic self now. You’ve likely started feeling called to it already. No matter how much pressure is placed upon you or how much you’re criticised or blamed, you’re allowed to believe in yourself. You’re allowed to have boundaries and to be fairly protective of yourself. You’re allowed to want to be pursued and want to be courted romantically. You’re allowed to desire to be wooed off your feet xD. You’re allowed to follow whatever your heart’s calling is. You’re allowed to move forward acting more graceful and strong in character and even physically if you’d like. You’re allowed to move your attention onto better things if whatever you’re focused on is affecting you negatively. You’re allowed to repeat mistakes as long as you manage to learn from them in the end. “I think all of us wanna feel something that we’ve forgotten or turned our backs on because maybe we didn’t realise how much we were leaving behind.” It’s okay to make sacrifices, it’s okay to make wrong decisions, it’s okay to learn, that’s how life is. You’re free to desire and believe in a true and deep love connection that you know exists because you’re full of the love that you wish to receive. You’re free to desire a deep connection full of mutual admiration, respect and love. You’re free to want to share your life with someone, just make sure that you’re not going into it with desperation. Your standards are not too high as long as you know that you’re asking for what you can give out. You’re free to want to be around wise people. You’re free to want to have a romantic connection with someone controlled, wise, ethical and respectable. You don’t have to feel bad about taking certain things seriously even if those around you don’t. Like supposing sex is a big thing for you, in this generation that’s kind of rare but it’s okay, do right by yourself. You’re free to have an impartial judgment in the beginning for your own good. You’re free to vet out and choose who deserves to be in your life and who doesn’t. It’s okay to want to strengthen your own character and reputation. You’re free to craft yourself and your life however you want, it’s your life to live.
꒰ What’s the destiny that’s written in your heart ? ꒱
The destiny that’s written in your heart is to leave the past behind. You’re the pile that will either deal with extreme loneliness or isolation of some sort that will only lead to you changing and growing emotionally. If you feel like most things have not worked out for you, please just know that whatever has not worked out is exactly why thing’s are working out for you, you’re going to see it while you’re living your destiny. Somehow, no matter what you go through, no matter how many times you’re hurt, betrayed, etc. you are meant to only continue to become more loving. The more you hurt, the more you learn how to love (yourself and others) is the energy that I’m getting. It’s important for you to be in touch with the present rather than staying stuck on anything from the past, don’t even hold onto the regrets, that’s how you’re blocking your own destiny. You might be the pile that got shamed for being emotional at some point and being too nonchalant at another, you’re going to get closer to yourself which will ultimately lead you to being more in tune with your own emotional nature. The more you’ll grow, the more you’ll embrace and learn just how much of a blessing it is to choose to be ever loving in a bitter world that wants you to be bitter as well. The way you are, your sensitive nature, the way you feel, the way you love, the amount of devotion and loyalty you give out has led you to being hurt, disappointed and regretful several times. There have been times when people have terribly embarrassed because you tried to see the best in them. The clown emoji is coming through, gosh 🤡😭. However, the destiny that’s written in your heart is strongly intertwined with loving and loyalty, you value genuine connections and are extremely compassionate, as you grow older, you’ll learn how to not make everyone’s problems your own. You’re meant to learn healthy boundaries as you grow older, you’ll learn how to extend your love and compassion towards yourself, that’s how you’ll unlock a major part of your destiny. You’re supposed to come in terms with the fact that maybe you weren’t the problem after all. You seem to have taken “the world is your family” too literally, you take on everyone’s problems and sorrows, and try to love and help everyone. Especially when younger, that was what you were like.
As you grow older and finally realise that maybe you weren’t the problem after all, you’ll start seizing opportunities as you let go of regret. It’s going to be a bittersweet but beautiful time. No matter what you may go through, you’ll only gain more self awareness due to it. You’ll start focusing on the more positive aspects of life and yourself. You’ll eventually start having gratitude and find your zest for life again. You’ll learn that you’re not everyone’s mother or caregiver and that what you bring to the table, and who you are is deeply valuable. You’re destined to learn just a little selfishness, not in a sense of only caring about yourself but in a sense of putting yourself first. I’m not sure why but your sex drive keeps on coming through. You either masturbate quite a bit or well, just have a high libido xD. You might have started masturbating much younger than most as well. Doesn’t have to resonate but that’s what came through. I wouldn’t be surprised if this pile has a mother wound or just female figures being unsupportive and problematic towards you. It’s definitely not going to be everyone but you may find yourself having a bad experience with many female figures while growing up. It could be something as simple as you think that you’re good with a certain girl or woman just to find out that they dislike you. You’re meant to have it all, abundance in the truest senses. That’s the destiny that’s written in your heart. You may be the pile that’s not afraid to dream and not just dream but also try your best to execute it. If you have to give up on your dreams for whatever reason, you may feel terribly wrong from within. The destiny that’s written in your heart is a lot of domestic bliss as well. You’re meant to have people who accept and understand your differences in your life. You’re meant to be emotionally content. The reason why you have a hard time with short term, casual stuff is because you’re meant to experience long term deep attachments. The reason you’re so loyal, feel so deeply and know how to be dedicated is because you’re supposed to find worthy enough people to form such lovely and long term connections with. You’re passionate, don’t even try to suppress that true nature of yours by trying to explore some half hearted stuff. You’re well rounded so you’re meant to experience a well rounded life - a blissful home life, a great career, a strong personality and being proud of yourself, you’re meant to have it all. All of this is the destiny that’s written in your heart. I hope that you enjoyed the reading and that it resonated, much love and take care, until next time 💗.
︎︎⊹ ! 🪡︎ Pile 3 ꒱
꒰ Where are you free to begin again and believe ? ꒱
This could be the pile that may have lost their way temporarily or were unable to focus on things that mattered at some point (education, money, career, etc.) You’re free to start again when it comes to education and your goals (educational, career, character, skills, so on and so forth). It’s time for you to believe in your own maturity and sense of independence. You’re free to begin again no matter how many times you may have quit or lost your path. You’re a very responsible person who is focused on building something for yourself right now. You’re free to take on this identity wholly and start/continue showing up consistently for yourself. Maybe you used to be like this as a child, you had all your priorities in place but as you grew up, you started burning out or something just caused you to stray off your path. It’s okay, as long as you get back on track. You’ve always been a very helping and trustworthy person with a strong will. You used to be really reliable, responsible and ambitious even as a kid. Even if you feel like you’ve disappointed yourself, it’s never too late to get back to yourself and your goals. Believe in and stay firm in your own karma (actions/deeds). A routine would really help you. You’re free to start trying to make the most out of your potential. Maybe, you were pushed into a period of solitude causing you to realise that you need to get back on track? It doesn’t have to be for everyone, it’s only for a select few of you. You might have ended up overindulging at some point when younger which led you to straying from your path. It could be an overindulgence of anything - liquor, heartbreak, friends, freedom, etc. You may have wasted that time but the fact that you know what it feels like to enter such an energy means that you’ll avoid it going forward. It’s good that you’ve managed to live such different lifestyles and take on such different identities, just to get back to being yourself and realising that you always knew who you were, and that life is a lot about having the courage to live as who you truly are. If you don’t have a social life or have too much of it (envy, rivalry, lack of approval but also people around you) causing you to either think too much or not have enough space to think, just remember that you’re free to begin again. If you don’t have much of a social life currently, you’ve dealt with envy, rivalry, lack of approval, disappointments, end of friendships, etc. before.
Some of you may be going through it right now, if yes, you’re free to begin again, trust me, it’s going to get better ;). You’re free to believe that your next relationships (platonic and romantic) are going to be great ones. You’re free to believe that change is coming in and it’s going to be big, and in the best way possible. Patience is important here though. Don’t settle and don’t give into desperation or urges of any sort. You’re free to begin again when it comes to self improvement. You’re free to put the past behind you and patiently make the most out of the present while looking forward to a bright future. You’re free to explore and expand beyond what you thought your interests and aesthetics were limited to. You’re free to claim fulfilment. You’ve overcome so much, give yourself a little pat on the shoulder, will you? You’re allowed to go with the flow of things while consistently working on whatever you want. Consistency and patience are guaranteed to reward you as long as you use your brain and abilities to the fullest. Plan but don’t stay stuck on the planning phase. You’re doing so well, please be proud of yourself as well. While others may talk about how much they’ve done, how they are, like they may really boast it, you don’t boast because that’s just innately in you and why would you boast about something that’s just natural to you? BUT THEY’RE REALLY BIG TRAITS AND THINGS IN REAL LIFE! You’re free to let go of extremism in order to find peace. You’re free to make peace with situations even if they were one sided. You’re free to reprioritise and have faith in your priorities even if your priorities were not in the right places for a while. You’re free to move on from the life that was not flowing correctly. You’re free to heal completely even if no one witnessed it and you’re free to feel proud of yourself even if there was no one to witness how much you’ve grown. All work, no play will make you a dull one, please try to strike a good balance between studies/work and life. You’re free to try to manage life better. Your past does not exist, it does not matter. Believe in yourself and your dreams, your hopes and wishes will come true as long as you’re willing to work for them. You’re free to move forward with more confidence and passion, grabbing opportunities and communicating well. You’re likely already a great communicator, if not through speech, it may be through writing but believe in yourself, it’s better to go after the life you want rather than convincing yourself that you’re happy with an average life. Remember, you’re always free to begin again and you’re always free to begin, when you find the place that your heart belongs, you’ll never leave.
꒰ What’s the destiny that’s written in your heart ? ꒱
The destiny that’s written in your heart is quite interesting. You’ve always desired to be looked up to. There’s something traditional and old school that you want, the old school romance, the old school love, the old school family, whatever it may be. It’s because it’s in your destiny. You could be someone who doesn’t enjoy having jokes made about them or didn’t like them when younger. You do not appreciate being the butt of any joke due to how much you value mutual respect. It’s in your destiny to love and adore, and to be loved and adored. You’re likely the marriage type. You want an equal and all encompassing love in which your partner treats you like their own and you treat them like your own. You desire to operate with your partner as a team, a family, united and with each other instead of egoistic and against each other. It’s because you’re destined for that. You’re meant to have a reluctance to explore anything that’s not deep and intense (romantically). You’re meant to have moments when you feel unsuccessful, like you’ve not achieved much, like you’ve not been able to live up to your potential so that you can find it in you to strive towards it. At some point, you’re going to be like “I’ve always known who I am, who I want to be. I’ve always known what was right and yet I strayed off.” That was meant to happen so that you can be more confident in who you are. Due to your deep emotions and the way you feel responsible for everyone and everything, and you desire to have an ethical and good character, you tend to be confused a lot because people try to make you think that you’re doing something wrong? That’s the entire reason why you strayed off your path in the first place. You’re going to be pressured into making decisions without knowing what it is that you truly want. You’re going to find yourself being very emotionally overwhelmed at some point because you also have a tendency to feel things deeply. You won’t know what it is that you truly want. There will be a point where you’ll wonder if you even have faith in yourself at all. You might get severely betrayed at some point when younger, likely by multiple people but might have mixed feelings regarding them because the situations will just be so cloudy. Also, you’re a genuinely really good person so your desire for connection will lead you to treat people as if they are in the same team as you even if they aren’t because you will not be aware of it, you’ll have their best interests at heart but when all of this rose tinted glasses, confusion, fog or whatever you want to call it fades away, you’ll feel as though you lived in an illusion for a quite a while. You’re someone who has a lot of enemies due to your naturally great character. In this world, many people enjoy tearing each other down, you’ll have to learn how to strategically move through life. You’re able to be very strategic, it’s just that you have ethics and morals, and care about people so you try not to hurt them. You’re going to have to learn how to be yourself and follow your path unapologetically no matter who it hurts.
Many of your friends tend to envy you and want similar things that you want, possibly even love interests, don’t feel guilty about doing and choosing what’s best for you. Most of these people desire to be better than you because they do dislike you to some capacity, one more reason to not feel bad. You’re meant to be courageous enough to go for what you want, even if it might cause you to end up in scandals or ostracised because at the end, you manage to gain so much from it, in every way. “You need to be cold to be queen, keep your eyes on the price, Jenny Humphrey. You cannot make people love you but you can make them fear you.” You have had friends who turned out to be envious of you at some point. In fact, you often attract people like this but it does help you grow. You are going to learn how to be selfish with these people. With those who do deserve your love and view you as a team, you’re going to treat them as if they were you, you’re going to give them the best and will try your best to be there for them. Those who see and understand you are going to have your back at all times. You’re going to change and grow a lot through all the envy and one sided rivalry driven conflicts but that will only get you to be more morally driven. You’re going to become more empathetic, trustworthy and a great adviser to those who deserve it, and a selfish, cold person to those who don’t. That’s kind of your destiny because when you’re going to be all kind and giving, having the best interest of everyone at heart, viewing them as a team, they’re going to undervalue you and take you for granted. They’re going to abuse your generosity and giving nature, they’ll also be mean to you, as if nothing you give is enough for them, even though you’re probably the best that they will find but you’ll likely learn the lesson of putting yourself quite young (by your early twenties) because you’ll have already experienced a lot by then. You’re probably meant to be very charitable though. Also, the deep connections that you’ll have (both romantic and platonic) and I mean the healthy, non confusing and lasting ones, they’ll be sacred to you. Those people will understand you on a whole different level and will treat you with such care, it’s touching. You truly do deserve this kind of love. I’m so happy for you. When someone is like you, many will dislike you for your greatness while others will want to find both - more of your greatnesses and your weaknesses in order to love you, in order to have you in their life, in order to be in your life because they’ll see you as someone to treasure, because they’ll grow to love you more and more, the more they get to know you. This is sweet, isn’t it? You’re going to start craving strong and mutual love quite young and you’ll start having a mature approach to relationships. It’s likely because you spent quite some time in illusions while what you were giving out was very real so you’ll crave that same realness because you’ll know that you deserve it. Yes, you will receive it as long as you don’t bend into settling and staying stuck in illusions. All of this is the destiny that’s written in your heart. I hope that you enjoyed the reading and that it resonated, much love and take care, until next time 💗.
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fuckmyskywalker · 3 days
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This might've been the thought I had but I'm not too sure
Dad!Anakin seeing you trying to sneak out for a party and gets mad because a boy he hates is picking you up. He fucks you til you can hardly walk and forces you to tell the boy you can't go anymore
18+, smut, dead dove do not eat, stepdad/fauxcest, daddy kink, minor impact play.
I've been going through the worst block I've had, so I hope you like this baby </3
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Pressing the phone against your ear, Dad!Anakin uses his free hand to yank your head back, keeping your head up and your body pinned against your bed, his hips slapping against your ass over and over, making the bed creak with his thrusts. 
“Hello?” Your friend's voice is muffled, and his annoyance is evident. He calls your name twice before clicking his tongue. “Where are you? I’ve been waiting outside your house for 15 minutes.”
“I—I can’t go out,” You struggle, eyes rolling back with each wave of pleasure that drowns your senses. You wish you could just throw the phone away, ignore whatever party you had in mind, and simply bury yourself in the plush mattress. To let go of the moans that are being held in the back of your throat and caged like a wild animal. Threatening to pierce your vocal cords just like Anakin is piercing your tight, sopping cunt. 
“What do you mean?” He asks, clearly upset. You can’t bring yourself to feel guilty, though. 
“My dad—” Anakin’s cock throbs as you try to come up with an explanation. You surely can’t tell your friend that your stepdad is rearranging your insides, but you can tell a partial truth. “He found out, and he doesn’t… doesn’t like you,”
“Alright, that’s it,” Anakin breaks in, huffing and taking the phone away from your ear, ending the call and turning it off. He tosses it away, watching it bounce over your carpet, one problem less. Returning his attention to you, he lets go of your hair, giving you a brief moment to breathe— only to later push your face against the sheets. “What were you thinking? That I wouldn’t notice you sneaking in the middle of the night? Dressed up like a slut and with that fucking guy you know I hate.”
The whiny apology dies when his hand lands on your ass, slapping your sweaty flesh meanly. He observes your thighs and cheeks bounce back and ripple, delighted by the ease with which a slight touch makes you tighter and wetter. Perhaps you don’t feel guilty for letting down your friend, but you do feel guilty at the thought of disappointing Anakin.
Despite his hand on the back of your head, you manage to lift it slightly, to look over your shoulder and make eye contact. Your makeup is beyond ruined, fat tears rolling down your hot cheeks. “I’m sorry, Daddy,” You cry, and you mean it.
Anakin’s heart melts, yes, he is mad, very much so, but when his princess gives him that look… Can he stay mad? He groans, speeding up his thrusts, squeezing the muscles on your waist so hard you moan at the pain. “Oh, my sweet girl, you won’t lie to Daddy ever again, won’t you?” He asks through gritted teeth, his orgasm approaching rapidly. Shaking your head, you mumble something Anakin doesn’t quite catch, too busy emptying his load inside you, your soft sniffles and moans undistinguishable through the thick noise that surrounds him after his vision goes white. Normally he doesn’t have a problem holding his climax, but those puppy eyes you gave him did the trick. 
Panting, you whine. You want to come too, but you are too afraid to ask. “Daddy,” The meek voice catches his attention; still inside you, he leans down, kissing your shoulder. “Are you still mad at me?”
“No, baby,” He replies, as breathless as you are. “Just don’t do that ever again.”
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ironunderstands · 2 days
Text
All of Aventio’s implications that I can remember because someone has to compile them 
Massive disclaimer: the purpose of this slideshow is not to prove that Aventio is canon (even if I personally think it is), but rather to demonstrate the relationship these two have in canon, as well as disprove the misconception that they hate one another, because no, they absolutely do not. This list is also in no particular order so expect a lot of jumping around in the story. I hope you enjoy reading! 
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Dr. Ratio added gambling to his update for the Simulated universe, and said a certain gambler would enjoy it, despite Ratio’s known dislike of gambling. 
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He put his all into carrying out Aventurine’s betrayal plan, and Aventurine trusted him to execute it correctly, despite the plan/going to Penacony having no obvious gain on Ratio’s end.
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Dr. Ratio gave Aventurine this note urging him to keep on living despite the pains of his past and the agony of the present, wishing a man who is already known for his luck the best of it, something which helps Aventurine survive the manifestation of IX. I am insane about this note and could yap on and on about it, but I will spare you the delusions for now haha. 
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Dr. Ratio wears his headpiece around those he finds to be unintelligent and not worth his time, but he has never once on screen worn it around Aventurine, signaling that he finds the man to be both intelligent and worthy of his attention. 
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Aventurine doubts his own intelligence and worth in his voiceline about Dr. Ratio, believing that the scholar doesn’t care for him. However, in Ratio’s voiceline about Aventurine, he commends Aventurine for his competence and skill, pointing out that his success is not in-fact just due to his luck, and if he keeps doubting himself he will meet the fate of those praying on his downfall.
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Aventurine is also the only person to actually have voicelines about Dr. Ratio so far, despite Ratio having interacted with many others, meaning he’s the closest in canon to Aventurine, seeing that he’s the only one who talks about him. (Hopefully Screwllum has a line on Ratio when he comes out bc I am starving for Ratio content lmao). 
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Aventurine’s first eidolon name is Prisoner’s Dilemma, which refers to a game theory in which two people can only achieve the best outcome of their situation if they put their faith one another while being unable to communicate/physically separated, and it mirrors the dynamic Ratio and Aventurine had on Penacony while acting out the betrayal plan. Which could mean nothing. 
His 6th eidolon name is Stag Hunt Game, which refers to another game theory based on trust, and is again, reminiscent of Ratio and Aventurine’s plan. Basically, they trust each other a hell of a lot, to the point where his eidolons are named after similar games of trust, which is no accident, as well, there’s countless game theories, and hoyo went with the ones specifically centered around trust between two people. For example his E4 is another one of those theories, but has nothing to do with trust, so they specifically selected his first and last eidolon to be about it, interesting.
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The name of the 2.1 quest that just involves Ratio and Aventurine is Double Indemnity, which not only refers to the legal matter but also a famous romance and thriller movie in the 1950s by the same name. Notably, it shares a lot of plot points with that of the 2.1 quest as a whole, and the fmc is always portrayed as blond, just like Aventurine. 
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There is also a scene within Double Indemnity that shares a lot of parallels between itself and the Final Victor lightcone. However in the movie scene she is holding the gun, whereas in the lightcone Ratio is, even if Aventurine is holding it to his chest.
Also if you want a more in depth analysis on how this movie relates to them, this person made a great one on tumblr :@anominous-user. (without the period, also it’s long as hell though be warned). 
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You receive the track “Spellbound” after completing the Double Indemnity mission.
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It is also the name of a 1945 film by Alfred Hitchcock, which is a Thriller, Noir and you guessed it, features romance as a major part of the plot. Its story also seems to have parallels to Aventio’s, but I’m not gonna get into that for now.
Notably, spellbound also means to hold the complete attention of someone, which is more often than not romantic, as only people you love/admire can captivate you like that. 
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The bathtub couch Aventurine gets Ratio during his demo (and is the only time the seating ever changes in demos) is reminiscent of the bathtub couch from Breakfast at Tiffany’s, and you guessed it, its another romance.
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He constantly flirts with Ratio in the pinball section of the Double Indemnity trailer, even going so far as to a) have the “Doctor you’re huge” line become a massive meme in the community b) he literally says the view is breathtaking when the only view is the giant Ratio he’s staring at. Honestly this entire section is so chock full of romance tropes (seriously what writer let their size difference kink into the story) that I have no idea how it passed censorship.
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Aventurine also flirts with Ratio in the 2.0 scene by asking where his alabaster head is, which means he’s seen him wear it before. However, even when Dr. Ratio is acting, supposedly yelling at Aventurine for being a useless fool, he doesn’t wear the mask meaning he doesn’t truly feel that way.
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They also have designated nicknames for one another, that are exclusive to them only. Dr. Ratio only ever calls Aventurine “gambler” while in his presence, and although Aventurine calls him Ratio sometimes, he often refers to Ratio as Doc/Doctor (Professor too in the CN) when talking to him. What’s interesting is that nobody else seems to refer to either of them with these names, meaning they made them for one another.
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Despite the fact that throughout Penacony, Dr. Ratio’s job is to sell the betrayal plan, he still apologizes to Aventurine in the 2.0 argument scene, and looks away during Aventurine’s sentencing presumably out of guilt/to not break his poker face when the other looks at him. He also not so kindly tells Sunday to visit a shrink (therapist), which should tell you how much his actions concern and upset Ratio.
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He also breaks his act again to check in on Aventurine. Hmm. 
Anyways time for the Aventurine keeping up with starrail speedrun because OH LORD, I’m gonna number these by image so I don’t exceed the count LMAOO. The first few are numbered by image, and the next are numbered by the columns of images, and I can clarify in the comments if you’re confused!
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1) Owlbert calling them good friends (which Mr. Tsundere denies, although he says Aven isn’t awful to work with) 
2) PRAISE OWLBERT
3) This line is very significant because only 3% of Dr. Ratio’s students ever pass his classes, in which they become experts in their fields. So, if Aventurine earns a passing grade in Dr. Ratio’s book, that means he’s exceptional to him as almost nobody does. 
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1) Ratio says his flashy outfits just make his job harder which ??? What do you mean by that sir do you not like seeing other people lay eyes on Aventurine serving cvnt? Why are you so worried about how his jobs go? Hmmm? Throughout the whole video he also keeps saying Aventurine shouldn’t take up fights in the first place, and the more logical thing to do would be to run away. Worried about our dear gambler Ratio?
2) How well do you know this man that you know his personal motto 😭 look genuinely idc if you leave this shipping them or not, how the hell are you gonna deny their friendship after this at the very least. 
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Ok homoverse/j Anyways basically what’s going on here is that the little showcase of Aventurine’s kit ended and Ratio gave him a compliment. Owlbert says it seems like there is some mutual respect between them. Interesting, instead of denying it, Ratio asks, “What did he say about me?” implying that Ratio respects Aventurine, but he did not realize the other respected him back. 
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1) Which causes Owlbert to spill this, which speaks for itself, Aventurine believes Ratio is the person who knows him best, so he invited him to be on the show. 
2) Which results in perhaps the greatest display of Ratio’s tsundereness to this day, also Owlberts face I can’t 
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1) It seems Ratio didn’t think Aventurine knew him so well, but oh boy it gets better (worse for Ratio though LMAOO)
2) Caught your ass in 4k, also please just go and listen to this demo again I don’t think Ratio could sound more flustered if he tried. 
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Apologies for the fuckass title card getting in the way no I don’t know how to remove it, but if you look closely in the first one, you can see a little sweat drop by Ratio’s face, which is again, another common trope with Tsundere’s when they get called out on their bs. “I really can’t tell what the deal is between you two,” me too Owlbert, me too.
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Aventurine knows Ratio is in the council of Mundanites, information that is only a rumor to the rest of the galaxy, and Ratio trusts him with this information.
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Acheron calls them friends, thank you Queen louder for the dumbasses in the back! Apparently there’s also a note somewhere in Penacony that talks about her, Argenti and of course Ratio being the ones to save Aventurine, so if I can find it, I’ll include it in the next part. 
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Oh and don’t you think I’m done w this ridiculous lightcone for one second. I’m  well aware it’s a display of Aventurine’s su1c1dal tendencies, hell I was and still am the biggest supporter of that, however I also have eyes and yeah this fucking thing is really h0rny oh my god. “He provocatively looks at the man before him,” ok, could have picked any other wording but you picked that one 😭.
Also, a key detail of this lightcone that people miss is that it’s, well, a lightcone. A lightcone we get in 2.0 as soon as it drops, and since lightcones are canonically condensed memories, this happened way before the events of 2.0, and is likely how Aventurine convinced Ratio to join him jn the betrayal plan. 
Moreover, Aventurine says “remain amicable,” meaning this isn’t their first meeting, and him and Ratio had at least been talking to one another for some time before this, which could mean their friendship/partnership/whatever the hell this is has dated back to perhaps even prior to 1.6 when we meet Ratio for the first time, but ultimately that’s just speculation. 
Lastly, for this mini lightcone rant: the animated version of it. Oh lord. 1) Camden and Jordan put their all into it istg 😭 2) Ratio pulls the gun back but Aventurine stops him, meaning that a) Ratio didn’t want him to get hurt, but he b) accepted Aventurine’s provocation, 3) Aventurine LEANS CLOSER to him while teasing him with his whole “why not doctor~,” sh1t and 4) if you look closely at both the animated and still versions of it, there’s a tiny spark of light in Aventurine’s normally dead eyes, which is just, yeah. 
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Ratios party voiceline for Aventurine. This is a complicated one because it is meant to be b1tchy in both languages (this is a tumblr post on it by @devxoid which goes over the nuance surrounding it. The TLDR is: directly translated, it means “take care of yourself, gambler, I need not your worry/concern,” but its actual meaning is far closer to the “fuck off” vibes in the CN. However, two this complicate this, 1) he sounds far calmer/neutral in the CN and 2) Ratio is the biggest goddamn tsundere on this planet, so even if he sounds mean, he does genuinely want Aventurine to take care of himself, as Ratio’s tried and true method of getting people to better themselves is by being rude to them, so it’s actually fairly in character, it’s just I think the way the line was directed in EN was a bit too harsh and threw some people off 
Finally, here’s some more silly ones that don’t really mean anything on their own until you put them into the context of everything else:
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Their status as package deal do not seperate in both the data bank and the profile pictures is extremely funny because they have no reason to be next to each other like that, they just are.
Their kits are also designed to synergize perfectly with one another, and in the livestream Ratio was put in the team to demonstrate Aventurine’s kit because well, they are made to work together. Aventurine is by far Dr. Ratio’s best sustain unit due to the debuffs he provides (alongside everything else) which only gets better with eidolons + his signature lightcone, and if you have ever played Ratio you know how much he likes debuffs. As for Aventurine, his arguably  best team is the FUA one with Robin, Topaz and well, Ratio, who is the main dps of the team. Honestly besides trying to zero cycle MOC there is no reason as to why you would run Ratio with any other support unit if you have Aventurine. 
I hope you enjoyed reading! Also, this is absolutely not everything, just all the stuff that’s easy to point out, and I’m not even getting into an actual analysis of the plot and how that demonstrates their relationship. Moreover, I don’t expect you to leave this shipping them if you don’t already like them, but I at least want to demonstrate that they are without a doubt close friends in canon, and there’s no denying it. I definitely missed some so feel free to point out more, as I might make a part two, as these are just all the ones off the top of my head. Continually, for the people who like Aventio, hopefully this serves as some sort of guidebook/reference to their implications/interactions, and if you have any moots who love this ship, I’d recommend tagging them in this bc I think they would love it! Have a good day :D
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mssainz · 2 days
Text
PART 2 | INTRUDER
Pairing: Carlos Sainz x Reader
Summary: YN found out that Carlos invited his ex to their wedding.
Warning: Angst, typos
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“We can make it work. Long distance relationships will work. Trust me, trust us please. Break up is not the answer,” Carlos pleaded to her. She pulled her hand from Carlos.
“Carlos, it will be difficult for us. Yeah, it might work but it would be a torture. It would be something that we do not want,” She explained to him. 
His tears were running nonstop down to his face. “No, please. Lia please, don't do this to me. Lia, we can work it out. Lia please.” Carlos begged for her to stay. He insists that long distance relationships would work for them but her thoughts say the opposite.
“I'm sorry Carlos. Maybe in the future, we can meet again. If that happens maybe we are really meant for each other. But for now, we have to let each other go. I'm sorry,” She said, ending the conversation and leaving Carlos devastated.
After the breakup, Carlos has to keep his composure to continue with his life, with his career. He tries to ignore the pain and voidness that he is feeling. He occupied his mind and time with working out, playing, watching, and anything that would keep him busy.
While watching his favorite cartoons, someone whispered in ears. 
“Aren't you too old for this?”
“YN?” Carlos' eyes widened as he saw her best friend whom he hadn't seen for years. She immediately opened his arms and they shared a warm embrace.
“I miss you, when did you get here?” Carlos said, beginning the conversation.
“I have been here for an hour or two already. But you're so occupied watching some kid's show or something,” 
“Hey, cartoons are not just for kids,” Carlos revoke.
“Yeah, yeah don't get feisty I'm just kidding,” YN replied, teasing her best friend.
Ever since YN came back, they were inseparable. For months, they are always together allowing Carlos to forget what he's been through. He was just happy whenever she's around. Not until he started to realize that he is actually falling for her best friend. 
Carlos knew that his parents always wanted him to marry you ever since. They were actually against his previous relationship because they only trust YN to really take good care of him and love him for who he is.
YN and Carlos started dating and got engaged. They were preparing for their wedding, when an unexpected guest came back to Carlos’ life.
“Carlos,” A woman from a far called for him.
“Lia,” Carlos responded as soon as she saw the woman in black. YN was so confused with the sudden change of expression of his fiancé. 
Lia walks towards him, not minding YN beside him. YN was shocked by the sudden gesture of the woman who she just saw.
“I'm here now. I miss you,” Lia whispered in his ears, which YN clearly heard. Carlos just stands there frozen, also hugging Lia.
YN cleared her throat to catch her fiancé’s attention. “Uhm, Lia this is my fiancé, YN. And YN, this is Lia…” 
“His ex-girlfriend” Lia continued his sentence. YN felt uncomfortable how casual it is for Carlos to introduce her to his ex-girlfriend. It was so awkward for her how sweet her gestures are and how Carlos just let her be.
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YN quickly glance at her message popping at the lock screen of his fiancé. Carlos immediately swipes the notification and grabs his phone.
YN and Carlos decided to have a simple private wedding. She was looking at the guest list. There she saw the name of his ex.
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243 notes · View notes
reidsdimples · 3 days
Text
Testing the limits
Hard Dom Spencer Reid x Wife!Reader
18+❤️‍🔥 MDNI ‼️
Saw someone say they needed a mocking Spence saying”aw you just want me to give you some attention” and came up with this 🥵
You cross a line in an attempt to get Spencer’s attention.
TW: Hard Dom Spencer, choking, squirting, restraints
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You pace back and forth in front of the door to Spencer’s home office. He had been in there for four hours at this point. After working a full day! It was admirable, his work ethic. But often left you feeling neglected.
An hour ago you knocked and he said “just a minute.”
You knew he wouldn’t be out in a minute. You also you knew you weren’t to go into his office. Something about the classified files in there and what not.
You push the door open to see him with his face still in a file at his desk. He didn’t even look up at you.
“I need more time,” he said dismissively.
It had been exactly 15 days since he touched you. Eight of which he was gone on a work trip, the rest were like this. Home but now home.
You knew what marrying him entailed but times like this when you got so wound tight, it was hard.
“Spencer,” you whine and stomp your foot.
He glanced up from the file briefly to see you standing there in one of his shirts with the buttons open and a thong.
“My love I have to get this done,” he asserts.
You pad away. You needed another plan. You would get him tonight before he worked so hard he fell asleep without so much as a word to you.
For a while you make considerable effort to stomp around upstairs above him, to clash pans in the kitchen, and blast music to get him to at least acknowledge you.
Finally you make a decision. You look back into his office to see him pacing behind his desk, on a phone call. Hotch from the sound of it.
You had a feeling that what you were about to do would get you punished. But you would take a punishment over the absence of him. Seriously, you were so pent up that the mere friction from your panties could make you moan.
He doesn’t see you stroll into his office as his back is turned. You pluck the three files off of the desk and make a break for it. He hears you scurry away.
“Hotch let me call you back,” you hear him throw the phone on his desk.
You make it upstairs and hide the files in a bookshelf in the library before running to your bedroom.
“Y/N you know better,” he calls as he approaches the bedroom.
Your heart hammers, you bite into your lip and pull yourself further under the bed. Excitement courses through you as you see his converse enter the room.
“Poor thing, so desperate for attention,” he mocks and circles the bed. “Pretty girl, I can hear you breathing,” he tutts.
When he reaches one side of the bed you scramble out of the opposite side. He takes long strides to the bedroom door and slams it closed before you reach it.
He was pissed, but he looked so fucking good. The top two buttons of his purple shirt were undone, it was only partially tucked now, and his hair was a mess. His eyes trailed over your mostly naked body as he chewed on his lip.
“So attention starved?” He steps slowly towards you. His deft fingers start to undo his belt buckle causing your cheeks to heat.
“Answer me,” he snaps the belt out from around his waist in a swift motion. You swallow hard.
“I missed you,” you look at him with wide eyes.
“‘I missed you,’” he mocks with a laugh as he shakes his head.
Oh yeah, you had crossed a line.
“Where are the files?” He folds the belt in his strong hands. You shake your head ‘no’ and don’t break eye contact with him.
One thing most people don’t expect about Spencer, is for him to have extremely refined needs sexually. He’s a sadist. You can see his heart rate increasing in his throat as you defy him.
He needs to inflict pain on you, for pleasure of course. You work well with him because you can take anything he dishes out. You get off on the pain, on watching him find pure elation in hurting you.
“You don’t scare me,” you huff, deciding to full send since he’s so far gone now.
You dart for the bathroom which is joined to another room entirely. The room you wanted him in the most.
You hear his calm and collected footsteps enter the room where you keep all of the toys for moments like this. He grabs you by the back of your neck and turns you towards him. You can’t help but laugh.
“I see now. It’s not just my wife that misses me, but my little whore,” he brings the belt down and it clashes with the backs of your bare thighs. You yelp and he pushes you further into the room.
“I need you,” you whimper and look up at him through long eyelashes.
He grips your throat hard, sending pulsing need to your clit as he backs you up against a wall.
“Where are the files?” He asks again, his mouth near your ear now.
“Not until I get what I want,” you pout and reach for his crotch. He seizes your wrist and pins it to the wall.
“Fine,” he huffs.
He reaches upward and brings leather cuffs down which are suspended to the ceiling above.
He suspends you there, your ass just barely touching the cherry wood wall behind you. This room, all fine crafted wood, soft carpet, and many surfaces for fucking. You had designed it together. You loved it.
You watch him move over to a rack of toys and grab a spreader bar, ah shit.
He latches each side to your ankles and spreads you as wide as your legs will go. You’re barely on your tip toes now.
He slowly unbuttons his shirt as his eyes darken, you watch him shift into the headspace you want him in. A primal look in his eyes that makes your mouth drool.
His shirt falls free and his slacks hang low on his hips, giving you a view of his perfect body and his hard cock straining against his pants. You whimper but you can’t move.
He brandishes a wand with a wicked grin and turns it on.
He approaches you but he doesn’t touch you at all. He won’t give you the satisfaction after what you did. He brings the head of the vibrator wand to your pussy and presses hard. You let out a restrained moan and try to move but you can’t. The raw sensation overwhelming, and you can’t close your legs around it.
“Fuck!” You scream as your body starts to shake. “Please,” you’re begging him to touch you. You need him.
He shakes his head as he watches you take it, his mouth agape. Your climax is building, winding painfully tight in the pit of your stomach. Your moans turn to screams and then…
He pulls away. You deflate in the restraints and glare at him.
“Where are the files,” he demands.
Your body is on fire, shaking with need.
“You’re not cumming until I know,” he crosses his strong arms. You shake your head, stubbornly.
“Fine,” he brings his belt up and wraps it around your throat.
It’s loose at first, the belt buckle allowing it to act as a slip knot. The long part of the belt hangs down your back.
He yanks it hard and it tightens around your throat. You fucking love it, you struggle to breath until your vision darkens and the he releases it. You gasp for air just as he brings the wand back to your throbbing pussy.
“Please,” you howl and then he pushes the wand harder against you as he tightens the belt once more.
Again, you reach the precipice of your orgasm and he stops, allowing you to breathe too.
“Fuck, Spencer!” You grind out.
“That wasn’t a safe word. And I still don’t know where my files are. Tell me. I’ll make you cum like the slut you are if you just fess up,” he taunts as he drags the head of the vibrator over your nipples. Arousal drips down your thighs.
“The library, one of the bookshelves on the left,” you pant at hang your head.
He gives you a cocky grin but drops to his knees before you.
He kneels between your legs and stares into your eyes. Then he’s sliding his tongue into your cunt greedily until you’re crying out his name. You try to rock against him but the restraints give you no leverage.
He presses the wand against your clit as he angels himself better to tongue fuck your pussy.
“Fuck!” You scream which prompts him to grab the belt and tighten it.
The sensations are too much, too good. His face is buried in you, the belt chocking you, the wand massaging your clit… you can’t even see straight as you violently begin to shake.
You erupt and you know you’ve squirted. He releases the belt just as your vision blackens and allows you to scream. He discards the wand and grips your hips as he sucks on your pussy like it gives him life. Your cum is pouring down his chin and chest below you, making his skin glisten.
Fuck, he’s so beautiful.
You could never get enough of him.
“Such a good girl for me,” he kisses your forehead as he carries you to bed. “Rest now,” he whispers as he tucks you in.
You almost protest, wanting to have sex but your body is limp with exhaustion from the edging and the orgasm that followed.
He disappears to the library to retrieve the files and return to work.
244 notes · View notes
russo-woso · 2 days
Text
Recovery || Leah Williamson
Warning smut 18+, fingering
Based on this request here.
When Leah went down during the match against Manchester United, you knew exactly what had happened.
Being a physiotherapist for Arsenal, it wasn’t you who ran over to her, instead, you had to wait on the sidelines to do further research as to what she’d done.
However, with your experiences with Beth, Viv, Laura and Teyah, you knew that your wife had done her ACL.
Watching her smack the floor in pain and anger, killed you.
The thought of her not being able to play in the World Cup shattered you.
Since the euros, Leah worked hard non stop to prepare herself for the World Cup and the fact she couldn’t play made tears spill from your eyes.
But the hardest thing for you, was knowing the agonising nine months Leah would have to go through.
It killed Leah too, but you made the torturing time less torturous for her.
You were there when she needed a shoulder to cry on, you were there when she needed something and she couldn’t get it herself, but the thing Leah loved most, was you were there to give her the best massages.
Leah loved it when you gave her a massage, your hands on her body, gently caressing her skin.
Normally at night time, when Leah was relaxed, you’d massage her knee, but sometimes it didn’t always stay a knee massage.
When Leah came to you one night and said she wanted a full body massage, you knew what she wanted.
“Come on then, baby. We’ll start with your knee.” You tell Leah, guiding her to lay on the bed as you grab the soothing lotion.
Rubbing some on your hand, you spread it across Leah’s knee, careful not to hurt her.
You managed to undo the knots of tension in Leah’s knee, before moving further up her leg to her thigh.
“That feels good.” Leah mumbled as you kept rubbing her thigh, moving onto the other one before telling her to roll over.
You rubbed Leah's shoulders, light noises escaping Leah's mouth as you hit certain spots.
Your hands got lower and lower until you were massaging her lower back.
The sounds coming out of Leah’s mouth convinced you that she wanted something other than a massage and you were prepared to give her exactly what she wanted.
“You want my hands here, baby?” You teased, massaging her ass.
“Yes, please.” Leah almost moaned, a sigh escaping with it.
You continued the movements with your hands, hoping to release tension from Leah’s body.
“How you feeling, baby?” You asked. “Anywhere else you want me to massage?”
“You know where else.” Leah sighed, her eyes looking lost.
“Here?” You teased, your fingers finding her soaking folds.
“Please.” Leah begged, her eyes shutting as you continued to run your fingers through her pussy.
“Relax, baby.” You whispered in her ear, Leah muscles relaxing as she laid her head against the bed.
You entered one finger, Leah letting out a low moan, before pulling it out.
“That feel good, pretty girl?” You asked, Leah frantically nodding in response.
“Please keep going.”
“Don’t worry. I will, baby.” You reassured her
Entering her again with one finger, you thrusted in and out, stretching her out before adding another.
Whimpers and moans left Leah’s mouth which just urged you to quicken your pace.
“Fuck, please don’t stop.” Leah said, her words coming out as breathy moans.
“I won’t. I promise.” You told her, using one hand to rub her sides.
Sounds of moans and your palm hitting Leah’s skin filled the room.
“I’m close, I’m so close baby.” Leah whined, her eyes screwing shut.
“Touch yourself, Le.” You said to her and she quickly started circling her clit.
“Fuck. Right there, baby. Right there.” Leah cried, your fingers hitting a new part that made Leah melt. “I’m coming, fuck, I’m coming.”
“Good girl.” You praised, gently thrusting your finger in and out of her to guide her through her orgasm.
When Leah’s fingers stopped circling her clit, you pulled out of her, not wanting to overstimulate her.
“Feel better?” You questioned and Leah slowly nodded her head against the mattress.
“Loads.”
“I like these massages between us. When it’s just us.” You told her and she let out a small hum of agreement. “Think we should do it more often, huh?”
“Definitely.”
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draconic-desire · 2 days
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your yan!neuvi series got me on a chokehold !! I feel so bad for darling but it got me thinking, would neuvillette ever allow them to i dont know, go visit mondt to look at their parents’ grave (?).
Neuvillette meets his (dead) in-laws edition 😂
Ok this idea is simultaneously kinda funny but also makes me cry a bit because I totally think Neuvillette would have ensured your family’s wellbeing in your absence. Despite his flaws, he still maintains his overwhelming sense of duty and justice.
Yandere Neuvillette x Reader
(A Dance with the Dragon Interlude)
Talking about your life four centuries ago has become a bit of a taboo in the household you share with Neuvillette.
Mostly, it only serves to incite an argument, one you are always predestined to lose. The other times, it only reminds you of painful memories. So, you’ve learned to bite your tongue, to keep your past held tightly to your heart. Neuvillette doesn’t seem to mind; in fact, you believe he might prefer if your history were to be wiped from your mind completely, leaving a blank slate for him to carve his essence into.
Which is why you’re so shocked when, on a particularly storming evening, the Chief Justice himself requests, “Tell me about what your parents were like.”
Jolting, you nearly drop the book in your hands. He’s not looking at you—usually, having his gaze on you translates to irritation, concern, or lust. When he’s looking away from you, as he is now, irises trained on the waves battering the cliffs below your home, you know that means he is instead thinking, pondering.
But thinking about what? Your eyes narrow, and your heart accelerates. What is he getting at?
A hand clenches around your heart when you try to picture your mother and father in your head—and fail. Four hundred years without a visit or simple image…of course their features have faded over time. But you’ll never forget the warmth, the knowledge that they loved you until the end and supported your lifelong wish of pursuing marine biology, even when it took you away from them.
You only shake your head. “I don’t want to talk about that, Neuvillette.”
He turns to you, now, eyes filled with calculation. A judge presiding over his court. “I had no parents. I simply…came to exist. Born of the water, the waves, the sea foam, and bestowed with this primordial power.” He glances down at his gloved hand, palm squeezing into a fist. “So the idea of parents is…foreign to me. Though I have a sense of the kind of ceaseless, unconditional love that defines a family.” You know he’s talking about his feelings for you, and your tattoo burns. “Experiencing a loss of that magnitude would be incomprehensible.”
For the life of you, you cannot figure out his endgame here. Why acknowledge your loss? Why equate his adoration and obsession with you for parental love? Your eyes burn, your breath quickens, you feel the tattoo pulse with energy as you—
“Do you ever wonder about how they lived the rest of their lives?”
Yes. No. Everyday. Somehow, you find your voice, a quiet thing filled with warning. Your skin feels so hot, like your veins are laced with lightning. “And how would you know anything about that?”
Neuvillette’s sharp eyes cut to your frame. “I…made sure that they were fully provided for. They lived happy lives, believing you to be living out your dreams in Fontaine. They are now buried together, in the cathedral cemetery overlooking the Brightcrown Mountains.”
Your breath hitches, and that power in your blood begins to settle. Their favorite place. The Brightcrown Mountains, where your father proposed to your mother. The Favonius Cathedral, where they were married. And the cemetery behind the church, where your grandparents had been entombed, too.
Something falls onto your lap. It’s only when you touch your hands to your face that you realize you’re crying. Neuvillette watches you with concern, one hand raised and poised to reach out to you, but he keeps his distance as he lets you process.
You release a shaky sigh. Was it true? Did they pass with no fear for your safety, in ignorant bliss of your extended life? The thought, although morbid in some ways, actually brings you a sense of peace. Your parents never had to endure the loss of you in the same way you had for them.
You swallow thickly, your voice hoarse with emotion. “Can we…visit them?”
That sets Neuvillette’s back ramrod straight as he blinks. You’ve only been out of the house a handful of times, and he was the one to bring this topic to light, but to venture out of Fontaine entirely? His protective and possessive instincts flare immediately, screaming at him to shut this idea down, to grab you and sink his teeth into your neck, dominant, claiming. But as his silver eyes flick across your face, taking in your tears, the tremble in your hands, the pit of mixed despair and relief in your eyes, he relents.
Slowly, he blinks, taking in a deep breath. You’re expecting an excuse, a verbal slap on this wrist disguised as concern for your safety. Which is why, for the second time tonight, you’re stunned when Neuvillette, rising to his feet, extends his hand. “I’ll take you there.”
~*~
The trip is easy, thanks to the Hydro Dragon’s teleportation abilities. The two of you arrive at the large square in front of the cathedral, the statue of Barbados towering above you. Briefly, you wonder what the Archon of Freedom thinks about your situation, or if he even deigns to care.
Not much has changed about Mondstadt in four hundred years. The streets still possess an older feel, cobblestone streets and stone walls surrounding the city. After seeing the drastic change in Fontaine, the fact envelopes you in a sense of comfort, knowing that at least one aspect of the world has aged alongside you, long-lived but unchanged.
It’s long grown dark, and the heavy downpour persists. Neither of you brought an umbrella as you ascend the stairs and wrap around to the cemetery behind the church. The rain, however, seems to dissolve into your skin rather than chilling you or soaking your clothes, no doubt another consequence of Neuvillette’s magic coursing through your veins.
The Hydro Dragon leads you to a small plot towards the back. Two tombstones are erected side by side, and you fall to your knees as you read: (Mother’s name) and (Father’s name) (L/n). Lives entwined to their last breath, they soar high above the clouds.
You hear a rustle of fabric, and soon Neuvillette has joined you, kneeling by your side. He raises his arm, and tendrils of blue light pool from his palm, forming the shape of beautiful flowers. They surround the graves, a sea of blues to celebrate your loved ones.
The two of you sit there for what could have been minutes or hours. All you know is that this is the most at peace you’ve felt in four hundred years.
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firewasabeast · 3 days
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i like tommy but kinda feel like him leaving buck during the first date was icky. thoughts?
disclaimer: I do not subscribe to the drama, but will post something I've thought about it.
I feel like if the situation were reversed, this never would have even been a conversation- except, maybe people praising buck if he were the one who left the date early.
Let's reverse some roles here. Let's pretend buck is still the same buck we know and love, but he's been out this whole time. Always explicitly bi from the beginning. He goes out with tommy, who is just discovering his sexuality and isn't very sure of himself or how the world around him will react. Now, that's all fine, until one of tommy's friends comes up and tommy starts trying to be aggressively (and embarrassingly) hetero. "We're gonna go find some hot chicks!" or whatever the hell buck says is said by tommy this time and buck is sitting there, a bit dumbfounded by how apparently terrified this guy is to be seen as anything but a friend to him. We would've been yelling for buck to book it out of there, that guy is nuts and NOT READY to be in a relationship with another man.
Which, back to what actually happened, is kinda what tommy thought. Not the nuts part, but that buck was obviously not ready to be out, and tommy didn't want to feel like he was forcing buck to be out. He liked buck, like a lot. Tommy seems like a man who's been hurt before, in more than just relationships, and he's honest but guarded. If he can prevent further pain, he will. So he bows out early (and respectfully, imo), he tells buck the truth, comes back when buck asks, tells buck he wasn't behaving badly (he was), and eagerly gives him another shot. Tommy is insanely kind and forgiving, and- while I do understand buck to a certain point- the only ick I saw came from him.
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Hi there! Thank you so much for your amazing blog. Really appreciate the time you put into this.
Do you know of any sterek fics where Scott is a bad friend and he does not get redeemed? He faces some real consequences for his choices?
Thanks so much!
I think so, @riverwood87!
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Thunderstorms & Polish Lullabies by Whispering_Merely
(1/1 I 10,057 I Teen)
Boyd is there, hovering over his claws, Isaac looks devastated, Jennifer looks bewildered and concerned and horrified, Kali looks smug, the twins are carefully keeping their faces blank but they're playing along, and- Gods, he's really going to be forced to do this, isn't he? Pack, his Pack, the make-shift family he'd all but accidentally gathered is going to die by his hand, and even if it's forced, it'll still be his fault, for wanting them, for needing them, for biting them.
Loving them.
He wants to close his eyes but he owes Boyd more than that.
And then, abruptly, in this saturated technicolor still-picture moment of chaos and violence- the eye of the storm- the door to the loft crashes open. With the water and the metal and the force of it, the sound is almost guttural, and far too loud- even Kali seems startled.
[Or, the one where Stiles time-travels just in time to save Boyd and Derek from the Alphas, and manages to heal everyone, including himself, just a little in the process.]
Stop Crossing Oceans by greenleaf
(1/1 I 11,654 I Mature)
“There are no absolutes, Scott! No hard rights or hard wrongs! The world doesn’t fucking work that way and we can’t afford to think like that, because people are going to die! We signed up for that the moment we got involved with all this!”
“We? We?” Scott hisses. “Don’t you think you? Don’t forget that you’re the one who dragged us into that forest the night it all started, Stiles. So if it’s anyone’s fault, it’s yours.”
Something inside Stiles cracks, so strong and so deep that he practically hears it.
Bring my heart to heel by Heyokaooohshiny
(30/? I 126,991 I Explicit)
Derek Hale leaves Stiles bereft after a one-night stand. After exposing his heart to the older man, someone he trusted intrinsically to at least remain friends, Stiles finds himself unintentionally abandoned by the last person with which he had any hope. With nothing left to lose Stiles uses the cover of a school trip to run away from the pack. He finds out soon after that Derek left him with more than just painful memories. He meets a witch who becomes a much needed friend.
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heaven444child · 2 days
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What will your future spouse/lover like in your behaviour🩵
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which pile drawn your attention choose it and please take what resonates with you and leave the rest ✨🍀🫶💜
AND Read these readings mindfully 👻and if you want a personal reading then DM me✨🍀
Pile 1
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pile 1 Your lover likes your mysterious look very much👀. He likes your independence✨, your dress sense 👗and he also likes your bold behaviour🧛‍♀️🧛. When you take a stand for yourself or for someone, he likes that look of yours very much. He likes the fact that you are always ready to help others🌸. He finds you very divine🍀. He finds you very strong and pure🌈. Whenever you are happy, you celebrate your happiness and enjoy every moment.💜🫶
(I hope this reading resonates with you)
Pile 2
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pile 2 Your lover likes your positive attitude a lot 🌸No matter how many problems you have in your life, no matter how much tension, no matter how much pain you have, you always move ahead in your life with a positive mindset 🫶Your future spouse likes the fact that whatever you manifest or want in your life, you always get it 💜No matter how hard you have to work for it, you are always ready for it 💕You are very protective about your things, whether it is related to your private life or professional life 👀You are very scared of things going away from you 😅Your future spouse likes your passion, hard work, positive attitude a lot✨
(I hope this reading resonates with you)
Pile 3
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pile 3 Your lover likes the fact that you are completely different from other people 😍You are very different from the crowd When you are alone, they feel that you do not need anyone and you are very happy in your life ✨Whenever you are alone, they find you very mysterious 🧛‍♀️🧛And they find you very knowledgeable ❤️They like that you speak less They feel that you do not waste your energy on useless people 🤭They like that you always help others 🤝Whenever someone comes to you for help, you never refuse anyone You help everyone when someone comes to you for help 🫶You love spending time with your loved ones 😍And you may also like pets 🐶🐱That is why your future spouse also likes your love for animals 🐣And they also like that when you don't like something, you leave it behind and move forward. 🐾They like your determination and your courage very much.🩵
(I hope this reading resonates with you)
💕 Stay blessed 🫶❤️ AND thankyou for your support ✨🤝🍀😍
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jhoneybees · 3 days
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Fear
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This is a first! My first smutty fic that is inspired by this song!
Taglist: @elvisalltheway101 @atleastpleasetelephone @i-r-i-n-a-a
Characters: Mid60s!Elvis x Wife!Reader
Warning/triggers: Never knew I would be saying this but...Smut! lol, mentions of sex, nudity, reader's first time-ish, nipple play, blowjob, male receiving and almost female receiving
_____________________________________________
The both of you are quite open with your thoughts and feelings and it's been like that for years and years, of course Elvis and you would sometimes feel a bit insecure about something but you two would find ways to work through it.
But the only thing that Elvis hasn’t shared with you is a fear, something that he thinks you might find silly and… maybe it is.
Ever since you met back in 1964, he has been dodging the topic of sex over the many years of dating and it's not that you’re dumb and naive around sexual things, no sir, Elvis sure knows you’re not a stranger to foreplay and it’s not that he hasn’t done the deed before, the two of you know he’s been with many girls before.
It's just this one thought, this one itchy thought that's been plaguing his mind ever since you brought up the topic.
Of course, he wants to have sex with you. Oh how he wants to show you how a man really loves a woman.
But it's just…he’s afraid that he might hurt you.
Most men may think it’s silly to have such ideas because it’s only natural to thrust themselves into a woman and pound them into the mattress.
Right?
Well, yes but there's something about the thought of seeing your angel face contort in pain, tears springing at the outer corners of your eyes and hissing at the burning sensation that doesn't sit right with him, he knows the pain wouldn't last forever.
He's just scared.
He couldn't bear seeing you wincing and crying because of him. He's always been so sensitive with how you're taken care of and yes, you're a full grown woman and he probably shouldn't be worrying about you so much like that.
Hell, he can't help it though.
This fear is scarier than anything else to him, even more terrifying than the big fear of proposing to you which he did a year ago.
Now he's finally married to you and right at this moment sitting on the edge of a bed in a hotel suite in Hawaii, on your honeymoon.
“Elvis…”
Elvis perks up at your voice, seeing your head peeking out from behind the bathroom door with that gorgeous smile. His lips curl at the corners.
“Close your eyes”
He does what you say and closes his eyes, he has an idea what you might be doing and he's nervous to say the least.
Swallowing thickly as he hears the varnished floorboards creak, a light whiff of your sweet perfume tickles his nose.
“Feel me”
He gulps again and when your soft hands lift his ones up to place on your hips, his breath catches in his throat at the feeling of delicate lace.
“You know what it is?”
He nods quietly, his heart pounding in his chest, he thinks it might go out of control at any second.
“Open your eyes”
Just…
How could he do such a thing to you? To tarnish your angelic, heavenly body, with how the white lace underwear moulds onto your hips and the little pudge below your belly button. The matching white lace bra complimenting your breasts, the softness and fullness of them spilling over the tops and little pink buds peeking through the fabric.
It’s all making his head spin. You’re so beautiful and he can already feel his dress pants tighten. He has shown his love to you in so many ways but he has never shown the way that he has been waiting to do and as much as his heart is telling him to show you, his brain is stopping him.
Fingers pushing ever so lightly against your waist. Elvis is in absolute awe of you, the pressure of his fingertips pressing down on your skin makes something crack inside of him, his breathing becoming laboured when the urge to feel your entire body with his palms enters his mind.
His eyes roaming up your body, eyelids fluttering lazily. A groan vibrates in his throat.
“You’re gorgeous…” he breathes, earning an angelic giggle from you.
As his eyes begin to trail back down your body, they snap up to yours when you place a hand on his shoulder. A breath sucks out of him at the slight contact of his clothed length getting brushed by your knee resting on the mattress between his legs.
He gently lays himself down at the light push from your hand, making sure to let out a breath or he would’ve exploded right then and there.
A flame ignites in his heart at just the sight of you crawling on top of him, your goddess of a body planting right on his pelvis and leaning down closer and closer to his face. Sighing at the feel of your soft lips pressing onto his passionately.
Elvis’ hands try to grasp onto something, anything, and what he finds is your hips, your squishy but firm hips.
Sliding them up to the curves of your breasts, he hovers his thumbs over your hardened nipples. Hearing you let out a moan as he brushes over your clothed buds.
“H-honey…”
Stuttering in between kisses. He groans at your sensual hums and gentle nibbles on his bottom lip, watching you pull away, he looks into your eyes that dig into his soul and with hesitant hands, he gently clenches the sides of your panties in his fists. Feeling your hands trail down his chest to his pants, shuffling back to unbutton and his breath hitches at your fingers wrapping around his cock.
His mind falls static at the image of you, leaning down and peering up at him with your pretty soft lips parting to take him into your mouth, knowing you'd take such good care of him because you always do, and as he feels your wet tongue flatten against his tip and enveloping him in between your lips letting the wet muscle slide down under his length ever so slowly and so gently, the wind gets knocked out of his lungs.
“Ooohh baby…”
His voice comes out hoarse and pleasured. He tried keeping his head up to watch you but the anticipation of wanting to feel you spreads all throughout his body and with that his head falls onto the bed.
Shaky hands going up to press into his eye sockets, a string of moans fall from his lips. He swears you must know every little trick, you make him become so undone in such a short time.
His hips stuttering, more slow dragged out groans squeeze out of his throat as the suction in your mouth milks every drop of him.
Elvis in a daze, his hands fall to his sides. Taking a few moments to come back to earth.
After taking a few breaths, he opens his eyes, sensing your fingers grazing his skin as you undo the buttons on his shirt, sliding it just over his shoulders. He almost chokes on his own saliva when you quickly take your underwear off and unclasp your bra, leaving you bare naked right on top of him.
…How did he get so lucky?
He’s falling in love with your body all over again because of the view of your little imperfections that you would always think are ugly, he finds them so damn sexy and he always makes sure you believe that too.
His gaze travelling down your frame, he grunts at how pretty your dark wiry hairs decorate the trail down to your womanhood. He’s hypnotised by your beauty that he doesn’t notice his cock is nearly just about able to be nestled in between your lower lips but when you grind on him again while biting your lower lip, he suddenly feels the wetness and as he's sucking in a sharp breath, the realisation hits him like a truck.
“U-uh.. honey uhm-”
“Hmm?...”
His brain runs in circles. That thought comes drumming back into his mind. He doesn't want to hurt you.
Feeling your hand travelling up his chest, his breath hitches at the mischievous glint in your eye, your hips moving to grind on him again and a mental flash blinds his vision. Your little hole ripping open twice the size causing blood to seep out and a deafening scream right in his ear coming from your mouth.
Sucking in the air as his cock slides in between your lips, his heart pounds out of his chest even more.
A small whimper rolling off his tongue.
“Hon-”
Elvis stares as your eyes flutter close, your face contorting slowly into pleasure and the sounds of small moans falling from your pretty lips, his horror thoughts come to a halt at the sight of your angel beauty melting into something that he can imagine is sinful.
His heart almost stops when you lift your hips. hovering over his hard cock, you lower yourself slightly rolling your hips over his red, angry tip. Teasing him. Barely rubbing, making combined gasps and moans fill the room.
“D-don’t, I’m gonna hurt you- please”
Flashes of the painful images flood his vision again. With frantic hands, he grips onto your hips to stop you.
“Elvis?”
Peering up at you with parted lips and furrowed eyebrows “W-w-w-we shouldn’t…” he shakes his head while quickly sitting up, leaning himself back against the headboard. Gulping thickly, Elvis runs his fingers through his hair, breathing in and out as he tries to calm himself.
It’s not just him who's been waiting, it’s you too.
He should be telling you.
“I-I-I don’t want to hurt you, Y/n…I-It’s gonna hurt a-and It’s not that ah don’t think yer strong baby, yer real strong b-but its just…I-I can’t bear ta see ya in pain” he stutters.
Glancing over at you sitting there on your knees naked in front of him on the shared bed, he swallows harshly.
“Honey I-”
“It only hurts for a little bit…”
His heart thumps at your sudden soft voice, eyes flicking from one of your eyes to the other. He’s looking for something, something like some sort of judgement but all he can see is bravery, certainty and just pure love.
“W-we don’t gotta do this anymore if ya- if ya don’t want to” he mutters.
The room falls silent for a few moments before your voice breaks through.
“Have you always been gentle with me?”
“Baby?”
“Have you always been gentle with me, Elvis?”
Clearing his throat softly, he thinks for a bit.
“Of course, darlin”
“ And would that change now?”
“N-no…”
Elvis gulps, watching as you crawl closer. Your legs on either side of his hips gasping softly at the coolness of your fingertip lifting his chin, your soft stare boring into his soul.
“Then there’s no need to worry”
Then ever gently your lips press against his, his heart sighing at your delicate hands cupping his face.
“I want your sex, Elvis”
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