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bloompompom · 1 month

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LOVER BOY | MINI SERIES

in which eren falls hard for you, his friend-with-benefits who insists she isn't looking for anything serious

PART ONE - all that glitters

⟡ content: eren jaeger x female reader, good old-fashioned college au, fwb-to-lovers, mutual pining/idiots in love, cheesy rom-com, smut fic with feelings, fluff, angst, sexual content, explicit language, alcohol, drunk sex. reader discretion advised. 18+ ⟡ word count: ~3k ⟡ masterlist (1/4) ⟡ a/n: writing has been a struggle but this came to me in a vision. i needed something easy and fun to get me back in the swing of things. enjoy ♡

“Eren.”

You whined his name in that signature drunken way, with the last syllable drawn out and pronounced like a plea—as if pleading with him was ever necessary.

“What’re you doing right now?” you asked. “D’you wanna fuck?”

No, not really. But Eren would make sure you made it back to your dorm room alive and as well as one could be after too many drinks. Still, he couldn’t deny how the back of his neck warmed at the offer.

“Yeah,” he replied. “Where are you at?”

After the call ended, it was only a matter of seconds before his friends predictably started heckling him.

Connie hung his headset around his neck, shooting Eren this too-knowing look when he asked, “Lemme guess who that was.”

“How about you don’t?” Despite Eren’s flat affect, his words had a biting edge. He kept his head down as he shrugged his jacket over his shoulders.

This wasn’t the first time Connie broached the subject, also known as you. Although it proved to be a sore spot for Eren, Connie didn’t plan to stop poking any time soon.

“Dude, she’s got you pussy-whipped,” he barked, “with a capital P, dude.”

“You said ‘dude’ twice,” Eren groused, hoping that would be the end of it. When the baiting look on Connie’s face didn’t let up, Eren felt compelled to defend himself. “I’m not pussy-whipped. She’s at a party and needs someone to walk her home.”

Connie rolled his eyes. “Yeah, like I haven’t heard that one before.”

Lounged on his bottom bunk, Jean glanced from his phone screen to Eren. “You know, these sorts of arrangements—friends-with-benefits, fuck buddies, whatever weird thing you two have going on—they don’t normally end well.”

Jean said it smartly, in that been-there-done-that way as if his longest relationship wasn’t with his right hand. Before Eren could call him out on it, Connie jumped in on the dog pile.

“And last time I checked, they don’t involve catching feelings,” he asserted, thinking he'd added something meaningful to the conversation.

“I didn’t catch feelings,” Eren refuted.

“Then tell me straight up you’re going over there for pussy and not because you think she’s magically going to wake up one morning and want to have a serious, exclusive relationship with you after literal months of saying otherwise.”

Ouch.

“It is exclusive,” Eren corrected, though his delivery was a bit shaky. “I mean, I’m not sleeping around.”

“Well, duh. But is she?”

Eren realized he had no idea if you were sleeping with anyone else. Why was he so quick to assume you had been faithfully fucking him? That wasn’t in the terms of your agreement.

Regardless of what (or who) you did when he wasn’t around, you called him tonight over anyone else. That had to mean something, right? At the very least, it meant the decency of giving him a heads-up if you were fucking someone else, he liked to think.

“I don’t think so,” Eren said. “She hasn’t mentioned anyone, and I’m sure she’d tell me if—”

Connie guffawed. “God, you are down so fucking bad. Just admit it to yourself.”

Eren had already done that a long time ago but they didn’t need to know that. Truthfully, they didn’t need to know anything about you, yet all three of his roommates managed to acquaint themselves with you despite never having met.

Eren tried to keep his fling with you under wraps—not for any special reason other than it was none of his friends’ business. But if he thought he was being sneaky, then he was doing a shit job at it because his friends caught on fast. After they spotted a poorly-hidden hickey, it didn’t take much to pull the dirty secret from him.

But it wasn’t really that dirty of a secret, was it? They understood it; why would he stick around and play video games with them when he could be getting his dick sucked? What they didn’t understand was why he continued doting on you like he was your boyfriend—no, like he was your puppy, loyal and entirely dedicated to you while maintaining that it was nothing more than casual sex.

Fat fucking chance. They would never believe such a thing. They knew Eren better than that. They knew he wasn’t meant for casual.

Eren bristled but held his tongue. Connie was right, and whatever bullshit Eren could spout wouldn’t be worth the breath; they’d never believe him.

If only he’d kept his mouth shut in the first place. At least then he wouldn’t need to dread this collective ‘I told you so!’ from friends who were all too eager to say it.

Lest he wished for this to devolve into the world’s shittiest intervention, Eren left without another word—not even a ‘goodbye’ in reply to Armin, ever the diplomat, hiding out on his top bunk until he deemed it safe. Unfortunately for Eren, his silence (and the slammed door) spoke louder than anything he could have said.

You’d sent Eren your location because you didn’t have half a mind to explain your whereabouts. Not to mention, the streets back on Fraternity Row were old and cobbled and poorly lit. You were a few blocks over from Eren, only a five-minute walk. Four, if he picked up his pace.

Had it really been months since this whole thing started?

You and Eren were introduced under more formal circumstances. He couldn’t confidently say you would have met if not for your professor’s intervention. She randomly assigned partners for the final project, stating everyone needed to ‘branch out'—as if they needed another freshman orientation course. Looking back now, Eren could appreciate the icebreaker.

That was in November. He met with you on a Friday only to spend the rest of the weekend with you on his mind. He remembered it well. For good reason, too; he’d never made out in a library before.

Neither had you, apparently. That was what you told him, whispered between giggles as you rose from your chair. You knew you were up to no good as you slipped into his lap, and you wore a glittery smile to match.

Eren’s conscience told him otherwise, but the more bestial part of his brain had already justified it with boyishly sound reasoning as to why it was perfectly okay.

First off, the two of you were tucked away in a secluded corner, hidden behind bookshelves blanketed in dust older than his college career. He hadn’t heard so much as a footstep the entire hour he’d spent here.

Secondly, who would come to the library this late on a Friday anyway?

It made for quite the compelling argument, outside of the fact that he himself was one of those Friday night library goers.

Eren couldn’t explain how you ended up there, astride his lap with his bottom lip sucked swollen and drawn between your teeth, other than stating the obvious: the attraction between you was instantaneous and the conditions were just right. The literature was just horrifically boring enough; the tension between you was palpable, nibbled away at bit by bit like a mouse gnawing on a cord. Accidental touches, as chaste as a hand brushed against his, became deliberate and lasted longer than the last. You would sit close, then closer, and move in a way that Eren would catch thin whiffs of your perfume, a sweet scent at the tip of his nose but warm in the pit of his stomach.

And like a cord, you risked a fateful snap: the moment you’d realize you were far more interested in each other than any ten-point word on the page—when you’d agree to leave the project abandoned on the table and let it fade into insignificance.

Eren didn’t know the last time someone made his heart beat that hard, if ever. Hard enough that he remembered worrying you’d feel it. Of course, it could have been from the thrill, but he had to admit you left him feeling completely caught off guard. He wasn’t sure if the feeling ever truly went away.

Exactly one week later, he discovered you had some friends-of-a-friend in common after bumping into each other at a house party. You approached him, eyes half-lidded, pupils dilated, but your smile as glittery as he remembered. You introduced him to a few girls, laying a hand on his arm as you said, “This is the project partner I was telling you about.” It flattered Eren to know you'd mentioned him, but more than that, it told him that you’d been thinking about him, too.

You brought him back to your room that night. It was the obvious choice between the suite Eren shared with three other guys or the single you miraculously snagged.

It was fun—and Eren knew how it sounded when he said that. ‘Fun’ wasn’t the first word that came to mind when he thought about having drunk sex with a near stranger. Fumbling and awkward, yes. But fun? Not so much.

Yet with you, it was.

The pressure he put on himself melted away at the touch of your hand. Maybe that was the moment, if he had to name one, when he first felt something. Something that ran deeper than a hormone-induced make-out session in the library and deeper than any one-night stand. All you had to do was be you. The drunk version of you—of both of you—but still you, nonetheless.

You kissed him not on your half-lofted bed but you were on your way there. Eren had your back pressed against it before breaking the kiss to take off your shirt. You helped him with his next.

Your hands immediately flew to his stomach, palming over the muscles in a way Eren wouldn’t describe as sexual—more like you were impressed.

“Whoa,” you remarked with a sort of wonder he didn’t expect. You squeezed his bicep next and then glanced down at your own. “Do you think I can get those?”

“Yeah, I’ll send you my gym routine,” Eren laughed. Though he supposed he didn’t really have a routine, he just went to blow off steam.

He pulled you into him, snuffing out your giggles with a kiss.

Confessedly, he came fast—not that fast, but quicker than he would have preferred. But he liked to think he made up for it, fingering and eating you until he was hard again and could go for round two. You sure seemed to like it.

When it was all said and done, Eren lay there and imagined falling asleep at your side, while you were already hopping out of bed.

Ugh. Putting it like that made him sound like a girl.

You exchanged numbers before parting ways, and he dedicated another weekend to you, this time planning his text to ask you on a date. He took so long that you reached out first, sending what you called your fuck it! text, both figuratively and literally—you cheekily threw that into the message, too.

When Eren agreed to ‘just sex, nothing else,’ he thought it was making the obvious choice. What idiot would say no to that? It sounded like the college dream, and that was what it was supposed to be, up until it wasn’t.

From then on, the time you should have spent working on your project, you spent fucking. Shameful but true. It was probably the reason you received a C. As it turned out, humans don’t retain much information when attempting to read aloud while another went down on them. Maybe the two of you should have done your project on that instead.

It was nearly spring now. The soggy beginning of the season as winter finally began to melt away. The night was rain-soaked. Eren could smell the remnants of the downpour on the asphalt as he walked against the breeze, chilly enough for him to hide his hands in his jacket pockets.

He approached the bustling house to find you sitting alone on the stoop, legs bent at the knee and a bit knobbled. He called out for you and watched a gigantic smile capture your face. The sight made his chest tighten.

Eren held out his hands for you to take and tugged you to your feet.

“Where are your friends?” he asked you.

“I dunno,” you absently said.

You passed him as you crossed the lawn. When you reached the sidewalk, you spun on your heels to see if Eren was following. He was.

“Don’t worry, I texted them that I was leaving.” You started to laugh. “Told them I had a booty call.”

“A booty call?” Eren pretended you wounded him, clasping a hand over his chest. “Is that all I am to you? And here I was thinking we were friends.”

You giggled as you kept your attention on steadying your stride. A bumpy sidewalk plus a few drinks past your limit didn’t make for a coordinated combination. Your arm brushed against Eren’s every few steps.

“Seriously though,” he started to say. “Shouldn’t your friends be the ones to get you home?”

“You are my friend.” You beamed up at him, eyes heavy but happy. “You said so yourself.”

He smiled back at you, genuine but closed-mouth, and didn’t flinch as your cold hand nudged a path into his for warmth.

He guided you into your residence hall and joined your elevator ride up to the eighth floor. He walked you down the left wing to the room at the very end of the hallway and swiped your student ID to unlock the door. He reached to flip the light switch but found it was already on.

“You left the light on,” Eren commented, closing the door as he followed you inside.

Your dorm was no larger than any other, but it sure felt like it with just one bed, tucked into the corner and still unmade from this morning. Your desk sat opposite it, with a window on the back wall dividing the two. The last time Eren saw your desk, he had you on it. By now, the clutter had been put back in its rightful place—a few loose papers and your open laptop—and doubled as a makeshift vanity with your tabletop mirror.

You hummed blithely before nearing him in a few steps. You went to kiss him, even had your hands on either side of his face, but you only caught the corner of his mouth. He took you by the shoulders and held you at arm’s length. Even from there, your breath reeked of vodka.

“You need to get some sleep,” he told you.

“I will,” you purred. “After—”

You shook free of his hands and peeled off your shirt, faltering slightly in the process. You tried to kiss him again, thinking your bare chest would surely tempt him.

When Eren didn’t budge, you pouted, “You tricked me.”

“Tricked is a pretty harsh word, don’t you think?”

Eren grabbed the t-shirt draped on your desk chair and plunged it over your head before he started to stare for too long. You scrambled to sort out its sleeves.

“So you came all this way just to tuck me in?” Your head popped through the neck hole to reveal your frown. “You’re not even going to have sex with me?”

“That’s right.”

You shimmied your jeans down your legs, glaring up at him. “You’re so boring.”

“I know,” he airily replied. He ticked his head. “Bed.”

You were drunk enough to listen obediently but kept your frown as you shuffled into your bed. As you crawled beneath the blankets, you watched Eren take a water bottle from your mini fridge and set it on your bedside cubby. Before his hand was out of reach, you lightly wrapped a hand around his wrist.

You intertwined your fingers with his, sweeping yours up and down the length of each. “You’re at least going to kiss me good night, right?”

You were always so touchy-feely when you drank.

Eren held his breath. His eyes followed as you pressed your palm against his, compared their sizes, and played with his fingers. It almost felt like you were pulling at something much deeper in him. A puppet and his puppeteer.

He knew what he wanted to do, but his friends’ words resounded in the forefront of his mind, listing the exact reasons why this was a bad idea. Then he went and did it anyway.

Eren leaned in to kiss you, not on your lips but sealed against your forehead. With his hand cradling your cheek to hold you there for that one, long second.

It wasn’t the kiss you wanted, but even so, you stared up at him in drunken awe. Softly, and with a softer smile, you told him, “Thank you for walking me back.” You nuzzled deeper into the bed, closing your eyes as you rambled, “You’re so nice, Eren. Didya know that?”

“I’ll be sure to remind you of that the next time you call me mean,” he teased before turning to leave.

You piped up again. Your voice was already sleepier than just a second ago, sounding smushed against your pillow as you murmured, “If I’m not married by forty, and you’re not married by forty, can we get married?”

He gave a tiny laugh through his nose. You were cute, weren’t you? He knew you wouldn’t remember this tomorrow. Or if you did, you’d profusely (and needlessly) apologize for it.

“You’ll be married by forty. You don’t have to worry about that,” Eren said, half-way out the door.

You responded with nothing more than a satisfied sound, drifting to sleep as quickly as Eren expected.

The heavy lock clicked behind him, but Eren gave it a final jiggle to ensure it. He heaved a sigh, leaning back against your door with a thud you thankfully wouldn’t hear.

This was a huge mistake, wasn’t it?

masterlist | next part

#eren x reader #eren jaeger x reader #eren yeager x reader #eren smut #eren fluff #aot x reader

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vikkirosko · 6 months

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Hi can I get this with helluva boss characters, fizz, Ozzie, Stella, and stolas? Thank you! ❤️

Headcanons Traumatic mutism

🦉 Stolas x Reader 🎩

Stolas rarely interacted with sinners. He was an aristocrat and he rarely had the opportunity to communicate with them until he met you. You were a quiet and calm person and during the whole time of your acquaintance you didn't say a word. At first it seemed unusual to him, he even thought that you were mute, and only after a while he found out that you didn't talk for a reason

You went through a lot of traumatic events when you were still alive, and since then you have been very emotionally traumatized. Even after your death, you remained silent. Stolas was very worried about this, but it wasn't something he could change with magic. It was up to you whether you would speak again or not

You saw each other often and Stolas always treated you with warmth and care. You supported him by communicating through notes and it meant a lot to him. When he came to visit you again, he saw that you looked worried. Stolas was afraid that the reason for this was that something had happened to you, but to his question you only shook your head negatively and took his hand. After that, he heard a voice. A slightly hoarse voice that hesitantly told him about love. Your voice

Stolas did not immediately understand what exactly you said, but when this realization came to him, he hugged you tightly, smiling radiantly. He was sincerely glad that you spoke, although it was obvious that it was difficult for you. He was willing to wait as long as he wanted until you said something again

🦉 Stella x Reader 👑

Initially, you met Stella because you seemed curious to her. You were an ordinary sinner, but something about you seemed interesting to her. However, during the whole time of your acquaintance, you have never uttered a word. It annoyed her for a long time, because she did not understand why you were silent, not even guessing about the true reason for this

She found out from one of the servants that everyone you talked to claimed that you never said a word. She didn't know what was going on in your head and why you were silent, but at some point it stopped being a big problem for her. It seemed like something she sometimes used for herself

Stella often brought you to the house where she lived after the divorce process with her husband began. She felt calmer around you, especially after telling you for a long time how much she hated Stolas. On one of those days, you approached her, trying to stay calm. She frowned, waiting for another note, but instead she heard a hoarse voice belonging to you and telling her about love

She was surprised that you spoke at all. She started to think you were dumb, but you weren't. However, Stella was even more surprised by your words. It was the first time someone had said words of love to her with such sincerity. She understood that you wouldn't get anything if you told her about your feelings and you knew it too, so she was sure of the sincerity of your words, and this made her soul feel warmer

🎪 Fizzarolli x Reader 💟

Fizzarolli and you met when he went to town for a rare time. You were surprisingly silent, despite the noise of the city, and even when people tried to talk to you, you used notes to communicate. Despite that, you were nice and friendly, even though some people were repelled by what you didn't say. However, he was not one of those people who would be afraid of this, so he was glad to meet you and start communicating

A few months later, he found out that you didn't talk because of the events of the past. It happened even before you died, even then you stopped talking, and it stayed with you even after death. Even in Hell, you couldn't bring yourself to talk. Fizzarolli knew perfectly well that there were things that left deep scars not only on the body, but also in the soul, so he tried to support you morally, showing that you were not alone, and next to him you could not worry about anything

You spent a lot of time together and during one of your joint movie screenings, he noticed that you were very worried about something. He didn't understand the reason, but he paused the movie to find out what happened. First you looked at the floor, then you took a deep breath, exhaled and looked at him. He was expecting a note, but instead you spoke. Your voice was hoarse and quiet, but you still spoke, you said words of love

It took him a few seconds to understand what you said, realize it and hug you tightly. He was delighted and sincerely glad that you spoke. Fizzarolli was glad that you started taking steps towards recovery. It was important to you and his support helped you a lot

🐓 Asmodeus x Reader 💕

Your communication with Asmodeus began at one of the parties he hosted. Your friend brought you there, but you were uncomfortable. You ran into Asmodeus and he was surprised when instead of the usual words you communicated using notes. You were able to talk a little and he invited you to meet again. That's how your relationship began

Few of his acquaintances understood why you were communicating. For all the time you didn't say a word and you were very different from Asmodeus, but none of them knew that you were an interesting conversationalist and that it was really nice for him to communicate with you. A few months later, you told him that the reason why you were silent were the events that led to your death. These events are so strongly imprinted in your memory that you still have not found the strength to speak again

He tried to create a comfortable atmosphere for you when you came to him. Quite often you sat together in his office. He was busy working when you came up to him and pulled his sleeve uncertainly. He looked at you and smiled gently. He was waiting for a note, but instead you spoke. It's the first time you've spoken since you were in Hell

You quietly said words of love to him. It was obviously unusual for you to speak after such a long time, but Asmodeus hugged you tightly, smiling. He was glad that you felt quite comfortable and safe next to him, since you decided to talk. He quietly told you that he was glad that you were gradually starting to talk, because it really was an important step for you

#Helluva Boss #Helluva Boss x Reader #Helluva Boss headcanons #Stolas #Stolas x Reader #Stella #Stella x Reader #Fizzarolli #Fizzarolli x Reader #Asmodeus #Asmodeus x Reader

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bloodycassian · 17 days

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Reborn - Reader x Azriel. AN - thank you anon for this great prompt!

Requested - I don't know if your requests are open but I wanted to throw something in just in case.

An Azriel x reader, where AZ and reader have never met before, reader has been tortured and experimented on by the court of nightmares ( Keir ) she could be a shadowsinger, and they're mates, when the reader is in the verge of death for refusing to work with Keir, AZ feels it and begins to grow hectic without knowing the reason, everyone in the inner court is confused until elain comes out of nowhere and tells everyone that his mate is in danger. ( Vision )

I have this on the back of my mind since reading some of your amazing work and couldn't stop thinking about it.

No amount of masturbation, drinking, or sparring helps the agitation under Azriel’s skin. It’s a constant, burning, itching thing that’s like a fucking disease upon his being.

Sleep is his only relief, but even then he’s plagued with pain and darkness. It reminds him too much of the dank basement he’d been forced into when he was young, so he stays up. He’s exhausted and brooding and quick to snap at anyone who questions him. He knows he’s being a dick but according to the five healers he’d seen, there was nothing wrong.

Nothing wrong, just like how his shadows weren’t some kind of magic, according to them.

He’d refused to believe in healers all that much since the explanation Madja had given him about his diseased pets. The writhing, tentacles of night were a ‘bodily mutation of the highest level, tainted with fae magic’. Tainted. The word felt right for what they were, but that didn’t mean it stung any less.

“We’ll invade here, and be able to plant our…” There was a beat of silence in Amren’s quick words, then her voice cut through his busybodied task like a knife “Azriel, are you even listening?”

Truthfully, he hadn’t been. He’d been consumed by the ache again, the broiling sickness beneath his skin that had every muscle flexed in tension. His mind had other battles to fight.

“What does it matter? You’ll carry out your plan with or without me. Keep talking, make yourself feel important, Amren.” His ill-tempered response came quick and laced with venom. One glance towards the small not-quite-fae female and his mind gave a twinge of regret.

A lick of her power radiated, filling the room with something vibrant and undeniable. Cassian sucked in a breath, and a word from Rhys had her firey gaze snapping to him instead. “Take your dog from the important business then, High Lord.” Her words were precise, hissed.

Azriel straightened. The insult didn’t land as well as Amren had wanted, in part because he couldn’t care less, another because the fire under his skin was reaching a peak that he had no idea how he survived every time it came around. He glanced to Rhys, who gave him a nod. Good. Let him free of this cage.

He flung open the balcony doors with his cursed gift and sprinted off the ledge, launching himself into the summer air.

Rats nibbled at your toes when you slept, scurrying away before you could catch them. Your senses weren’t even close to what they had been months ago. Before, you’d been able to catch at least two a week for extra sustenance.

You told yourself that they’d learned, that they’d gotten quicker at their biting and fleeing. Truthfully, you could feel your strength waning every day.

Living was no longer hope, and more of an inconvenience.

But it was an inconvenience to Kier as well. And that meant you’d keep on living out of spite.

The next female would appreciate it.

“Arms up, legs together.” The order came with unnatural casualness that you’d grown used to. If you didn’t follow the orders, you were beaten until you either complied or were unconscious, so complying was really the only option. Especially when you were attempting to stay alive for as long as you could.

It’s for the next girl. You chanted to yourself when the keeper made the injection. It stung like hundreds of bees attacking the same place, but the pain was familiar. A friend you welcomed before everything went sideways and the nausea rolled in.

The drug Kier’s men gave was like none you’d experienced outside this cell. An incredible high, with a disastrous low.

You convulsed on the floor moments later, your body still barely able to take the amount they dosed you with. You’d seen the liquid inside the damn thing grow each week, they were marking your progress with every one of them. So, with each dosing you made sure to put on some dramatics for them.

The clawing at the throat was false, the sound of your screams only half-forced. The real, unforced reaction though, was always the shade of pallor your skin turned after every injection. The darkness that radiated from you like a bubble, the pain made physical.

It hovered over your skin like an aura, tendrils of it washing over your forehead when the sweating started. It always started like this, for the first few hours - or possibly minutes, you weren’t sure once you were lost to the pain - they’d observe, and sometimes Kier himself would join, looking like a disappointed mother. Then, once the shaking subsided, and you were able to breathe normally, they’d release a rabbit into your cell.

The same rabbit almost every damn time. After the first two weeks, you’d grabbed the first one and snapped it’s neck, hoping that Kier would be happy with the accomplishment and you’d earn something. You’d felt awful as it died in your hands, but the pain… if it stopped the pain, you’d kill anything.

But time after time, they’d send in another rabbit, and though you begged for some kind of explanation of what they wished with the damn thing, they’d only observe. After a few hours of investigating, it’d eventually be removed and you’d wake up alone again.

Kier did not make an appearance today, and after your shaking stopped, neither did a rabbit.

“Where’s dinner?” You croaked, the tears stinging small cuts on your cheeks. Your friend never laughed or spoke, hardly even moved when he was in the vicinity of your cell. It was odd, even for a freak who enjoyed drugging and torturing others.

The male only stared, writing in his little notebook. He could at least humor you and tell you what he was so keenly logging. Some friend.

He opened the door, but instead of the rabbit jumping inside, he stepped forward, past the barrier and wards keeping you from breaking through. Your breathing halted.

“Your reluctance to learn your gifts has given us no other option.”

“Did you lose a fight?”

Nesta’s words normally bounced and slid right off Azriel, but with how volatile he was feeling, it took all his restraint not to snarl at her.

“Come on Az, where’s that quick wit?” She chided, crossing her legs at the knee beside her sister.

His eyes drifted to Elain, the warm blush of her cheeks. Her lavender nightshirt made her seem so much more vulnerable than she was. He knew just how lethal the female could be, and admired her for it. His eyes drifted to the soft hair and round features that he’d once dreamt of. How foolish he’d been, how full of hope and bitterness. Now here he was, merely a ghost. A shell for pain to be housed in and nothing more.

And here he stared at a garden of hope and light. The female who’d haunted his dreams for years. The opposite of the steel bitch that sat beside her.

A pang of guilt pinched at him. “You’re ridiculous.” Was all he could muster at her. Nesta was trying to help, in her own way, he supposed. She was testing his limits and temper, even while balancing comforting words and attempting to heal her little sister’s mental wounds. Not to mention navigating the strange, untrained gift of Elain’s.

It wasn’t often that Azriel came to the house of wind proper. When he did, he usually confined himself to the dining area and the war room, where the formal dinners and meetings were held. He hadn’t walked the halls into the large internal library in a long, long while. No wonder they both had turned their chairs to face him when he’d cracked the door to find them both here.

The large windows seemed crowded with the amount of books that surrounded them. The only source of light, aside from the twinkling magic fueled ones above. The room had always made Azriel feel claustrophobic, and now it set him on edge in a way different than it had before.

Especially when Elain’s eyes bored into his own. His skin felt like it was shifting, pulling and pushing from just beneath. He was beginning to wonder if the healers had somehow missed a parasite of some kind. Something new perhaps, something they’d never seen before.

Elain’s eyes widened, her cheeks going from the pink blush to sickly pale in an instant. Her expression was unfocused, hazy - as if she were drunk. Azriel suddenly felt like he was intruding, like seeing her so vulnerable was something reserved for only those close to her.

Nesta placed a hand on her shoulder and rubbed her sister’s back comfortingly. It was about as tender as Azriel had ever seen her, even with Cassian. He watched the hands that rubbed the Seer, recalling the intense desire he’d once felt for her. Embarrassment coated his cheeks, distracting him from the physical pain for a moment.

He’d wanted to be that support for her, once. Nesta’s hand seemed to grow in his vision, the embroidered collar of Elain’s nightshirt with it. He blinked rapidly, trying to refocus. The blackness around his eyes did not recede though. His bones ached, and his headache stabbed at him like a branding iron. He rubbed his temple, squeezing his eyes shut.

“She needs help.” Elain gasped, coughing on a breath. Azriel wavered on his heels, something hard hitting his back, crushing his wings.

He could barely hear the high strung sound of Elain’s voice. “She needs help, Azriel!”

He tore though the court, dragging Kier kicking and frothing with him. He’d received a few severe wounds from the cruel male, but nothing that a few patches of his siphons couldn’t hold together.

The gushing stab wounds could wait. He had something far more important to tend to.

“You’re a bastard, a low-born inconsequential bastard, Shadowsinger.” Kier coughed as Azriel dragged his broken body with him. The crowd pushed and writhed around them, but his outstretched dagger kept any of the patrons from advancing. Several dark looks, hisses of death closed in around him, but he plowed through them all, working his way to the catacombs behind the stone chair that served as Rhys’s dark throne.

“I may be a bastard-” Azriel grunted through his pain, now more fevored and intense than before. It was a wonder he’d even been able to make it here, but it did explain his sloppy handling of Kier once he’d found the male.

“But at least I didn’t sell a daughter off as stock.” He tossed the would-be-king to the locked door of the catacombs, a part of him enjoyed the thunk his head made against the stone floor, even through the intense agony that ripped through him.

This was not the place to show weakness. If he let his shadows drop, let the air of anything but a cold hearted killer go for even a moment he’d be trampled by the crowd.

Kier rose slowly, muttering curses while he pulled out a key and slid the door to the side. He sketched a bow, waving Azriel in. Spit landed at Azriels feet as he crossed the threshold, and he hesitated in his step. A hiss rang out behind him, shuffling feet a song as the crowd quickly scooted back. He held his stance there for a moment, collecting the wrath that built in him. It writhed and twisted in his mind, his guts, his teeth throbbing with the urge to tare out Kier’s throat.

The blistering heat flared again, this time in his jaw and he moved down the hall, towards the cells that an unfortunate assistant to Kier had described.

He’d made their death quick, painless.

You couldn’t scream, could hardly breathe with the weight that seemed to be growing in your chest.

Not weight exactly, more like pressure. Internal pressure, like there was lava built up inside you with nowhere to go. And every rattling breath seemed to give it more life. You wheezed, weak with the exhaustion of fighting it.

Your friend had given you three more of the injections, and promptly left when you began struggling against the binds at your hands and feet. One of them had ripped, you only knew because that was the hand that you’d used to claw at your chest with.

The blood made going any further too slippery and exhausting.

There were far away sounds, but it all seemed too strange, so disjointed to be real. Screams and sharp clangs of metal, breaking glass and thudding.

Your eyes slipped closed, and relief washed over you. The pressure eased, and the squeaky hinges of the door opened. Had death finally come? Was this the end of your cycle, and now they were bringing in a new victim to Kier’s experiments?

There wasn’t much of a goodbye to the world, though. As sad as it was to not be able to see your family again, you were just grateful that the pain was receding. That finally there’d be no injections, no innocent rabbit and certainly no Kier around.

The sounds were strange, a choking, strangled sound like the first time you’d killed the rabbit. Your eyes cracked open almost involuntarily to see what had happened.

Outside your cell in a glow of blue light was a winged male, his hand wrist deep inside your friend’s chest.

Blood is hotter than most people think it is. Azriel takes joy in it though, when it’s the blood of the truly vile ones. The male with the syringes and log book reeked of something spiced and foreign, something Azriel’d never encountered before. He would have asked, would have talked to the male if he’d not pulled a knife and threatened to ‘kill her’ as he backed away.

There were no thoughts after that. And as he fell to the floor, Azriel reveled in the male’s labored breathing. Relief and heat flooded him, prickling him with a soaring joy he’d thought abandoned him long ago. He could laugh, if it weren’t for the absurdity of how it sounded to laugh at this moment.

He plucked the book from his hands and shoved it into his belt behind him, his chest thrumming with joy.

He’d never been so filled with glee before, so overwhelmed with it after killing… Had he become broken in a sick way? Was he no better than the male he’d just killed? He looked to his hand, twisting it in the low light of his siphons.

A wet, weak cough echoed off the walls and he spun, knife ready.

Then the blade was on the floor as he rushed to the bars of the cell door, ripping it free of the rusted hinges.

The female was gaunt, and frail. Yet his chest sang and though she looked moments from death, he couldn’t imagine more beauty.

She clutched her chest, the blood there crusted and dry. “Thanks.” She croaked, voice barely a whisper. Shadows mounted around him, enclosing them in complete black. He would have thought he was winnowing if it weren't for the sorry excuse for a bed that stayed beneath her.

Azriel’s lips were moving, but he couldn’t tell what he was saying, even to his own ears. His mind, his body was a rushing river of every emotion at once, all cascading through his mind, to his chest and thrumming in his blood. Her eyes went wide and wild, searching his for a moment. His heart thundered in his ears.

What had his life been until now? Why was this moment such a climax to him so suddenly? All of it, the pain the agony, the stark moments of joy against it all - the brief moments of shared happiness that made it all worth it tore through his body like a flash floor.

Tears pricked his eyes, and it was a curious thing to see them fall onto her neck and wash away the blood there.

Then, a wet sigh from her lips, and her eyes stopped searching his. The rush of joy and sense of sanctuary ceased. His blood went quiet in his ears, and the room felt suddenly cold. The room silent around him, not even his shadows dared whisper.

His fingers hesitated over her cheek. When her next breath did not come, he shook her gently. Her eyes remained, staring blankly at the ceiling.

This was truly a tomb now.

“No…” He heard his own words that time. The word clattered through the cell like a bell tolling, echoing.

“Take her back.” A shadow hissed over his ear, caressing.

He shook her again, the tears boiling over now, panic gripping him.

“We know how.” another said. This voice was different, the same whispered tone and suggestion, but this was not one of his pets. He sent his own shadows skittering away, and a group of them stayed, unbound to him and unmoving from the cell. His heart skipped, fear upon fear pulling him into the icy abyss of despair.

His own shadows returned, a broken syringe floating to him on their behest. They mingled with the others, reveling and dancing together though Azriel felt that he was slowly sinking.

“What am I supposed to do with this?!” He shouted at them, at nothing. He had truly lost his mind, hadn’t he?

“Save her.” The strange shadows told him. Just like Elain had said, overtaken by her visions.

A tendril of the foreign shadow wrapped around his hand, locking the glass pieces there and slicing into his palm. The needle aimed directly to her chest, between the ribs, only a few inches from the heart.

And what did he have to lose? The silence that surrounded him now was almost worse than the pain had been. Wouldn't pain at least be better than complete nothingness? To feel completely blank and unwritten as a being?

With a breath, and a part of his siphon’s power to support the broken syringe, he pushed into her skin. His own blood dribbled down the sides, mixing with hers. Through and through - until he knew that he’d met the same depth of a killing blow to an opponent’s heart.

“Side, block, strike.” Cassian’s orders came out in demanding, practiced tones. Each step, each swipe of your blade met with one of Azriel’s shadows as a shield.

His were still much, much stronger than yours, even after months of practice with them. Even with him showing you very intimately just how much they were capable of. Your cheeks blushed at the reminder of that.

“No distractions, keep that shadow talk in the bedroom, Az.” Cassian scolded.

A smirk played at your mate’s face, and he hit you with a surprise swipe at your feet, left unprotected by your own shadows.

You fell on your ass, cursing.

Azriel offered a hand, panting at the exertion the sparring had taken. You were proud of that, at least.

The first six months of training had been dedicated to building stamina, gaining back weight and muscle while balancing training your shadows to obey you. Six months ago, being able to spar with your mate had seemed like a far off dream that you’d never be capable of doing.

But with his training, and Cassian’s encouragement, you were almost able to take him on stride for stride. Almost.

So, you took his hand and pulled him towards you for a kiss. Then knocked his knees out from behind with a wave of your own shadows.

You smirked, and offered him a hand while Cassian boomed with laughter.

He allowed you to help him up, but cleaned in close, pecking a kiss on your cheek.

“You’ll pay for that later.” He said in an intimate tone. A lick of his shadow wrapped around your thigh, snaking upwards.

“Promise?” Your eyes sparkled at him, and the pain all those months ago had been worth it for this.

#azriel x reader #reader x azriel #acotar fic #azriel shadowsinger #shadowsinger #reader insert

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stagefoureddiediaz · 2 months

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Costume Meta 7x01

Aaaaaaannnnd we're back!!

OMG I cannot tell you how good it feels to be back writing costume meta - I have missed it so very much and this first episode has given me lots and lots to talk about so lets crack on with it shall we!

Where to start?! Firstly - Its amazing to have Alayna Bell-Price back in the driving seat and she is a genius because she knows the characters better than anyone and I have to say from my perspective there is a pretty clear difference between this episodes costumes and the ones from season 6 - not that s6's costumes were bad, just that you could see the shift of having a designer who didn't know the characters to the same level. I’m going to go in order of character appearance in a non uniform capacity for this one I think so we’re going to jump around from character to character a bit. There is no Maddie or Hen this week, as we don't see them out of uniform, but every one else is accounted for and I've included Norman and Lola as they've got a multi episode arc and their costumes are interesting and playing into a colour theme!

putting it below the cut as its a long post and I on't want to overtake everyones dashes! Enjoy!

We start off with Athena in this pale pink high neck ribbed sweater with large bell sleeves. I've spoken a fair amount about pale pink over the last couple of seasons of costume metas and how, in clothes its representative of childish and immature behaviours or thoughts. That holds true here - the pale pink is playing into Athena's childhood - when she developed her fear of cruise ships - its creating a connection between her childhood experiences and the woman sitting in Franks office.

We get a flashback that shows her in yellow and orange - the yellow for communication and the orange for transformation. A literal moment where we see Athena transform from the innocence of youth to her developing anxiety and fear around cruise ships. Its really clever visual storytelling connecting adult with child and shows us her fear is genuine and founded in something that she may not have been able to articualte fully as a child, but she can as an adult, even if she doesn't actually articulate it to Bobby.

Our next non uniform costume is Chimney. The lighting is really low in this scene, so it's kind of hard to be 100% sure of the colouring, but he seems to be wearing either a dark navy or black button up shirt under a dark green and black bomber jacket. The use of really dark green in combination with black, Back is a colour that can be about hiding ones vulnerabilities - concealment and masking, but it is also a colour associated with magic (generally dark magic) as well as pessimism. The green is growth and renewal, and the hope for a better future. to use them in combination i this way is playing on Chimneys insecurites and fears, his desire to keep the 'magic' alive in his relationship with Maddie, but it also speaks to his growth, that he goes home and talks to her about it (even if he does come up with an insane plan to 'date forever').

Eddie in the locker room - aside from being shirtless for much of it and pulling some epically good faces - was a super interesting costume choice. Especially the use of his watch! first though - Denim shirt time! We don't actually see Eddie in a denim shirt all that often and we've seen him in the super washed out one far more than dark denim shirts. I've been laughing a little bit at a few people (on twitter mostly) claiming its the same shirt he was wearing at the hospital during and after Bucks coma and it being a play on bringing Buck back to life. While I like the theory, its actually a very different shirt - the one in the hospital was black with a grey wash out and was made of velveteen - so different colour and fabric.

This shirt, is however one we have actually seen Eddie wear before and its far more telling than if it were the hospital shirt. You need to bear in mind that this scene is about Buck and Eddies respective girlfriends (or lack there of) and the fact that Christopher has a girlfriend now as well. This shirt is the same shirt Edie was wearing when he (re)introduced Ana to Chris in 4x08 (breaking point my beloved! the gift that keeps on giving!) and this puts a conversation about Marisol and things going well with her into the same category as Ana - suggesting she is ultimately destined for the same fate as Ana. the other thing that plays into this narrative is the use of the watch.

Eddie does not put the Christopher watch on until after he has found out that Buck has broken up with Natalia - so during the entire conversation about their respective girlfriends, he is only holding the Christopher watch, rather than wearing it.

In the picture below from 4x08 you can see that Eddie is wearing his black 'work' watch rather than the brown strapped 'Christopher' watch. Remember that the first time we see the Christopher watch is when he goes for his first date with Ana in Jinx, so he already has this watch and in theory should be wearing it in this scene. The fact he isn't is pretty telling and I'll go into that a bit more later when we get to Chris's (and Eddies) date scene.

Then we have Buck in his outfit of many colours! The white trainers, continue to play into my theory of Buck wearing them when he is in key points on his journey to discover his self - her it is about showing his growth - that he ended the relationship with Natalia - this is a massive thing when we saw how long it took for him to end things with Taylor - The man who clings is growing and getting out before it drags him down!

The jacket is similar in style to many of the ones we've seen him wearing in season 5 and 6, but this one is much brighter and more colourful. I know I go on about white meaning bad things for Buck, but that isn't relevant here - the white bad things happen to Buck theory is much more about t-shirts, jumpers and shirts rather than jackets - its an under-layer rather than a top layer that = danger. So i'm not thinking of its relevance here for this scene. What I am going to say is that this (according to my spreadsheet!) is the first time we've seen Buck in a white jacket of any description. To me, it's playing into the idea of purity and rebirth which is what white is often associated with. This plays into the comment Eddie makes welcoming Buck back to 'the land of the living' but also implies that Buck is starting a new chapter and making a fresh start - the check patterning suggests it might not all be plain sailing though.

The check pattern is an interesting one, obviously check pattern theory comes into play here, but whether its only in relation to the reveal that he split with Natalia, or if its also foreshadowing Buck getting himself into danger/trouble down the line, remains to be seen.

I'm going to quote myself again because I did predict that this scene may be about his relationship with Natalia when we got the stills dropped - the costume department never let us down!

The only thing I can do is scream into the void about check theory because check does't bode well for people - they always end up in the middle of the drama (see my check theory posts linked on my pinned post for more) and while they come out the other side (99% of the time) Buck in check for that scene in 6x18 pretty much doomed his relationship with Natalia (its specific to her and not C&K's baby as Buck wasn't wearing it when he delivered it!) and as that shirt in the still is very un Buck like, has not only yellow ochre in it, but also its a white base (and we all know buck in white is a bad sign!!) and its check patterned - my theory is that this scene is connected to Natalia in some way - either Buck is not being true to him self in more than one way - that things are going to/have come to a head for their relationship (my kingdom for a reverse of Buck to Eddie about Ana in 5x03!!!) and lead to a pretty big change in some way (fingers crossed for Buck to end it and then finally break down and deal with his trauma!!!) Some other things about that shirt - the colour combination - the green blue and yellow ochre are giving me call backs to coma Buck (another reason I think it might be connected to Bucks unresolved trauma around his death and Eddies absense in his dream)

In the quote above, I was also referring to the blue and white check pattern shirt he was wearing when he and Natalia got together, but there was also the fact that in the balcony scene at the end of 6x18, we also saw her in one of Bucks white shirts. I wrote in my 6x18 meta about how those two things combined didn't bode well for that relationship going forward, and thats what leaves me unsure about the check pattern on this white jacket being purely about something that has already happened. If I put my Buddie goggles on, I would perhaps suggest that the troubled times ahead may be more connected to Buck and Eddies relationship, and this would fit in with a couple of the things Oliver and Ryan have said. The thing with check theory though, is that generally speaking if it's on one of the mains, they come out the other side of the dram/trauma stronger than before. So if it is connected to Buck and Eddies relationship, then we can expect it to be in an even stronger position on the other side of whatever goes down (and at this point you can't strengthen their relationship any further and keep them as just friends imo!)

Chimneys forever dating proposal to Maddie, connects with his outfit when he's talking to Hen - it's the same jeans and black shirt, so the meanings of black, can be continued on into this scene - the idea of magic and hiding his vulnerabilities. The addition of the jacket with this brickwork pattern in its weave is a fun choice, it's playing into the idea of building something, but also plays into the idea that Chimney has his walls up - again fitting in with the black meaning of hiding his vulnerabilities - because instead of expressing his fears to Maddie ad then them talking it thorough, he comes up with his insane forever dating concept. the fact that much of this scene is a contrasting parallel with the scene from season 1 when he is pretending to be someone else entirely for Tatiana all ties in perfectly with this costume. The fact that he reverts to wearing blue (ran out of picture spaces so I couldn't include one) later on - when he's realised his plan isn't realistic, talks to Maddie and they end up back on the same page is really good to see - the blue being a signature Chimney colour and is indicative of him being true to himself.

Bobbys blue suit and blue check patterned shirt. The brightness of the blue is a really important choice - it's the only time we see him this brightly coloured on the cruise until he ends up in the bright red at the end. This is important because this is the moment when he's still all excited and hopeful for his honeymoon cruise - everything is good in Bobby's world at this moment in time - the check pattern is telling us that it's not going to stay that way for long. From her on out we see the colours of Bobby's costumes slowly beginning to dull and take on a washed out tone, but here in this moment all is good.

Athena's bright yellow dress is all about making her stand out - communicating with the audience, she is the brightest person in the room (in more ways than one!!). The thing with yellow, apart from the communication aspect, is that it can also be a symbol of anxiety and fear, so this dress plays rather nicely into the theme of Athenas fear of being on that ship.

The colour does have other good traits too - its fresh and bright and is a colour of happiness in its more jewel like tones and I think we can see all of these meanings in these scenes - Athena might be anxious about being on the ship, but she is also happy and enjoying herself with Bobby in that moment.

Lola and Norman. Lola is the one we need to focus on in her very bright very check patterned Victoria Beckham dress. Obviously the check pattern plays into check pattern theory, but the red also acts like a neon sign to the audience - highlighting that Lola is in danger - the ga won't pick up on check theory, although they might connect the dots about the fact this check patterning looks very like a cage - foreshadowing her being held captive later on, but also as a nod to the fact she was incarcerated previously.

The red is also a nod towards romance and love - playing into the rekindling of their relationship and romance in the aftermath of the freeway 'see me Norman' incident.

Ok so Christophers date night and by extension Eddies date night! This is where this meta is goingto get a bit messy and I'm goingto jump around a bit becasue I need to talk about the way colour theory is at play in all the scenes in Christophers bedroom, so we're going to talk about Christophers bedroom as one big thing rather than the two separate scenes that it actually is. They are extensions of one another and build on so much of the groundwork we've already seen in previous seasons.

Chris in plaid check yellow and red check plays perfectly into check pattern theory - it’s a signifier that something is about to go down with him - namely that the fact he’s dating multiple girls at the same time.

He’s also wearing a white shirt which is not a colour we see on him all that often - in fact, the only times we’ve seen him in a completely white shirt is with his suit in 5x01 when suit shopping and again in 6x08 for his school dance. He did wear a white vest when dressed as wolverine for halloween So as you can see its not a common colour for him, but the times have seen him wear it as a solid colour have been connected to school/girls and dating (i’m including the suit shopping in this because Ana was there and it was kind of a Eddie and Ana date of sorts - in that it was suppose to be for this Christening - meet the family - date type thing).

The most interesting thing is the plaid hooded shirt though. It was such an interesting choice to go with for a couple of reasons. the colour way is especially loud - we tend to see Chris wearing greens and blues and greys, with the odd other colour thrown in occasionally. So red and yellow are not common colours for him to be wearing.

On the red front we see him in it a couple of times - the adapted skateboarding scene and the scene in 4x10 when he joins Eddie and Ana on the sofa - getting in the way of their date night. We do also see him wear red in Christmas related episodes (so I don’t tend to count them in the same way as the Christmas colour theming will nearly always override any other colour theming intention - the use of stripes or check or other patterning is more important in those episodes!).

On the yellow front things are even more clear cut - the Tsunami arc, the aftermath of him falling off the skateboard, Mays graduation party and 5x03’s Eddie Ana break up! These (apart from the tsunami shirt) were all bright almost neon yellow.

This new plaid shirt is more into the yellow ochre part of the yellow spectrum, therefore tying much more to the tsunami arc, which is actually really fitting if you think about it in a little more detail - its a connection, not only to Buck, but also to loss and grief. Eddie might have been using his secret weapon (Chris) to get Buck out of his moping (read mourning) over not being able to go back to work, but Christopher is also still grieving the loss of his mother at that point as well, so its not just about cheering Buck up, its also about giving Chris a chance to do something fun and distract him from his own grief. That is why the use of yellow then ties in so nicely with its use on Chris now.

The other thing that really grabbed my attention about this shirt though is the fact that the two times we’ve seen Buck have a conversation with Chris in his bedroom, he has sat in the same spot and has been wearing one of those two colours - post shooting in maroon and this episode in the yellow ochre - if you watch those two scenes side by side, you see that they’ve used almost identical camera angles as well to film Buck.

I've spoken a lot about the use of maroon as a colour connected to parenthood - especially fatherhood , which is how its intended to be read on Buck - connecting to Eddie and his being shot, pushing Buck into a parental role in Eddies absence.

That alone is a pretty loud reference to Christophers connection and relationship to Buck, but then we have the yellow ochre of it all.

I feel a little bit insane about how close my prediction was on what the Buck Christopher scene was going to be about - this is from the meta I wrote when t he stills dropped;

Whatever this scene transpires being about, based on what we've seen with Buck wearing yellow ochre, we can assume its going to continue to play into this idea of Buck not being fully truthful with people and fitting into the role he thinks people want him to pay rather than being true to himself. I do want to add to this theory by looking at Christophers shirt as well. The grey/ yellow combination is a bit reminiscent of Breaking point (the episode that really is the gift that keeps on giving) because we get Chris in grey and Eddie in tan - that is yellowish toned whilst not actually being yellow There isn't a good screenshot of them together, but the placing of Chris and Buck in the new one has echoes of Eddie and Chris in that scene (one that is interestingly enough playing into the idea of changing family dynamics, but also the moment before and the one that happens afterwards at Bucks loft, directly placing Buck into a parental role (as an aside the idea of Buck being a miracle worker plays into the theme of Eddie looking for magic, just saying!))

Indirectly this scene was about Buck not being true to himself with people and fitting into whatever role he thinks people want him to fit into, only this wasn't an active situation - this was a scene where Buck could draw on his experience of having done that in the past to help Christopher - the line from Eddie 'you didn't end up being like you' is such a call to this and actually shows how valuable Bucks own experiences and learnings are in helping Chris (we've all been joking about Eddie choosing Buck to help him with this Chris's issue, but in actual fact he was the perfect person for the job - not just because of his being a 'reformed player', but also because of his relationship with death and the death of a loved one where you are reliant on others for their memories of a person rather than having your own)

The thing with the Yellow ochre (this meta here that i've already quoted from above is the place to go if you'd like more detail on its use on Buck more widely) isn't just its about it's connection to Buck, his place in Christopher's life and more loosely to the will of it all, (the fact that Buck and Eddie are both wearing the same colour ways as in the hospital bed will reveal scene and are both on the same sides of the screen in both scenes is a stroke of genius and is meant to connect these two scenes together) its also its connection to Shannon.

The first time we meet Shannon, she sits on Christophers bed in more or less the same position as we see Buck and Eddie sit, and looks at where Christopher has been positioned in all these conversations, and she is wearing a burnt orange top thats pretty close to the dark yellow ochre we see Buck wearing. Shannon wears a lot of yellow - as in it there are only a couple of times we don't see her wearing something yellow or with yellow in it and those are key scenes (which I will talk about later on).

Shannons appearance in Christophers room to read the letter she wrote him had her in this black top with a floral patterning on it. She was also wearing green trousers (which can be seen in the still below but aren't actually seen during the scene.

I actually really loved the green trousers and black top as a choice because the top is very Shannon - it sits perfectly with the floral patterns we saw her wearing when she was still alive. The green trousers are a bit of a departure for her, but I think its very intentional for two reasons .

The first is that they are very much in the Eddie trousers wheelhouse, especially in combination with black - he wears green khaki trousers a lot. The inference being that the black and green combination is an echo of Eddie.

The second ties to Christopher. Green is also a colour we've seen on Christopher a lot, it's probably the colour we see him in most. It's being used as a reflection of the fact he is growing and transitioning from child to teenager. But having it here in this scene - on Shannon connects a Christopher growing up without his mom.

Both of these combined really connect into Shannon in this scene, tying the three of them together and on Eddies efforts to keep her alive for Christopher - the underlying implication that his growth into who he is so far is as much to do with Shannon as it is to do with Eddie.

Her necklaces were not identical to the ones we saw her in in season 2, but that's most likely because they don't have them any longer, so they've replicated them as best as they can. The other little nod that I enjoyed is the brown bracelets on her right wrist - the same place Eddie wears his brown strapped Christopher watch!

But the top they have her in plays into a couple of other things - the prominent yellow flowers make an obvious connection to Buck from the previous scene, but they also tie into the 'I want a divorce' scene from 2x17 where she is wearing a dark blue dress with bright yellow ochre flowers all over it. the dress is not especially close to the top in the wider sense - blue dress with white squares v black top with florals in a variety of colours, but the yellow flowers are the prominent aspect of both items of clothing and play into the yellow theme connected to Shannon and then to Buck.

This is espeically relevant when you remember that Eddie is in a black suit in that scene and he's wearing black when he gives the letter to Christopher.

The black for this sequence of scenes is such a poignant choice - its Eddie mourning all over again, not for his loss, but for Christophers loss. I did find it telling that again in this scene, we have the absence of the Christopher watch. Eddie has very rarely not been wearing a watch in his scenes, so the times when we don't see him wearing one are very telling.

For me, in this sequence of scenes, it's about the fact that they are not about Eddies relationship with Christopher, but about Shannons relationship with Christopher. The watch is much more about Eddie and Christopher, so to have it absent from this story arc makes total sense and is symbolic of Eddie being a good father

Then we have Christophers grey shirt - I said when we first got the stills from that scene, how it was likely to be connected to complex family relationships - a la when we’ve seen Buck wearing his grey shirt. And what do you know - the scene was about complex family dynamics/ relationships.

It wasn’t perhaps in the manner I was expecting, but that series of scenes played with the full scope of Chris’s complex family relationships - from the relationship he has with Buck -not only as Christophers friend, but also as more or less Eddies co-parent (the way Eddie asked for Bucks help screamed co-parent rather than friend imo - that whole burnt out car scene was two co-parents discussing their child!) to the relationship he has with his dad - which is a pretty great relationship, but it is a complex one.

The relationship he has with his mom - or the fact he feels he doesn’t have a relationship with her despite Eddies best efforts, because as he grows up she feels further and further away.

Eddies 'date' night with Marisol. Again I ran out of pictures (30 is not enough!) so you're going to have to use your imagination or go back and rewatch the scene for yourselves, but trust me when I say that Eddie is wearing the same shirt he was wearing for this date night as he was in 4x10 - when Christopher interrupts because he can't sleep!

It's also a similar tee to the one Eddie wears when he has his breakdown and trashes his room (that one was more green when this one is much browner). Its slouchy and has cut and stretched raw edges at the sleeves and on the pocket - in the same way his breakdown shirt did. there is an element of being in familiar surroundings and being comfortable at home, but stretched out raw edges and Eddie generally tend to mean not so great things.

Of course there is the element of his parenting skills being tested by Christophers having more than one girlfriend, but if that where the only reason, then it would've made more sense to have him in that shirt when he's listening in to Chris talking to Buck, rather than when he's on a date with a new girlfriend.

This is especially true as the screen time for that tee has more connection with Marisol than it does with Chris. Combined with the fact that once again, like in the locker room scene, he is not wearing his Christopher watch in this scene and that speaks volumes.

If we are to read the scene as being about Christopher soley, he should be wearing his watch because that watch is a physical embodiment of the importance of Christopher in Eddies life - that he puts Christopher first in all things.

Got to say I was a bit shocked to see Marisol in his bright magenta silk spaghetti strap top when you consider the costumes we saw her in last season - mostly dressed down, t-shirts, jumpers and dungarees so this is a complete 180 for her character.

There are a few interesting things connected to her outfit, firstly it low key ties into Natalia - we saw Natalia in a red version of this top for her first proper onscreen date with Buck (when they go to the badge and ladder joint) so there is an interesting low key parallel to draw there. There is also the fact that her bracelet is a chain one - much like we've seen on all of Buck and Eddies previous girlfriends - although those have been necklaces, so I'm undecided if this chain bracelet is paying into the same trope as those.

Then there is the pink of it all.

You see Eddie and Pink on his girlfriends doesn't bode well for Marisol.

Both Shannon and Ana wore pink. Ana wore it a lot - there are two examples below, but generally speaking its her most commonly worn colour - including on her first date with Eddie in Jinx.

The first example below is from the first time we see her in the Diaz house. the shades are different, but the fact that the first time we see both characters in the Diaz house they're both wearing pink, speaks volumes.

The other key use of Pink is when Shannon is at the beach with Eddie and Christopher and she tells Eddie she's pregnant - Eddie takes it as the sign he has been looking for - the chance to effectively start over with their marriage, but this is the beginning of the end for their relationship, even if she hadn't died a short while later. She is wearing pale pink in that scene and it's the only time we see her wear the colour in the show.

The fact we can also contrast the use of pink with when Buck wears it is telling in its own right - we see the relationship between Buck and Eddie strengthening when Buck wears pink - May's graduation party, the tsunami, the Hildy coffee machine - all moments (big and small) that show the development of various aspects of their relationship and its ability to endure.

Essentially all this use of pink on the women he has had previous relationships with, doesn't bode well for Marisol and the longevity of her relationship with Eddie. How quickly it will end I can't say, just that it will end.

I spoke earlier in this post about colour theming for the episode and this is where I talk about it!

Pink - and in particular the very bright pinks we saw scattered across the episode. Marisol above wearing it, isn't just about connecting her to Ana in costume terms (especially as at this point that costume is a departure of her costumes from s6) it also connects her to the other characters we see wearing bright pink in this episode - Lola and Norman.

At this point in time I'm not sure if we're going to see it play out as a theme across the season, but its use in this episode was very loud on characters that are going to be around for more than 1 episode. It suggests that there is some underlying theme that connects them (by this I don't mean that they're gonna meet and hang out I mean that personality traits are going to be similar)

Magenta and bright pink in colour theory means a few different things, and like with all colours, has positive and negative traits. Generally speaking its a loud and brash colour thats designed to stand out and draw attention to it's wearer.

Things that are considered positive traits for this shade of pink are; intensity, acceptance, kindness and it's supportive and uplifting nature. It's connected to naive love (as in lust rather than the passionate and enduring love of red) can also be considered a nurturing colour.

Negative traits are; intensity, volatility, arrogant and impatient, irritability and irritating and frustration. it is also said to be a stress inducing colour and is said to be overly emotional.

Theres a clear and fairly loud connection between Lola and Norman getting into danger - Lola is in magenta trousers when she is kidnaped. Norman also has bright magenta flowers on his shirt at this point as well. My guess at this point is that we're supposed to lean into the stress inducing element, and also the irritating nature of the colour (On Athenas part at the very least!) and we'll see if those are the themes that play out for Marisol as well down the line.

Norman is in bright pink when he's lying and claiming she's unwell from being outside or too long. We also see that he is wearing pink in the ditsy print shirt later on (again I ran out of picture spaces!)

Athena's black top in this scene is much like the use of Chimney in black in his scenes. It's all about power and authority but it's also about her hiding her vulnerabilities. The other thing it does is creates a huge contrast with Bobby and all of the other passengers - she is the only one in black in the scene and it contrasts her with the underlying white of Bobbys shirt - juxtaposing them and visually putting them at odd with one another.

Like I said above about him becoming increasingly pale - here we see Bobby in a sea-foam green shirt - its the palest and washed out colour we've seen him in on this cruise (grey pyjama shirt not being included as its blink and you miss it and a pyjama tee!!!). Sea-foam green doesn't really play into the traditional meanings of green - there is still the element of renewal about it (the sea washes the sand etc)but its mostly a self-conscious and uncertain colour - both things that perfectly sum up how Bobby is feeling in this moment.

The other fun thing about this outfit is the palm tree shorts the patterns Bobby has worn in relation to this cruise, up to this point (and that includes the shirts from season 6) have all been tropical themed but on his shirts, the fact that they've now slipped down onto his shorts is a visual representation of him becoming increasingly dissatisfied with the way his honeymoon is going - that the tropical vacation vibes are slipping away.

Athenas red and white shirt, in my opinion is showing her cross purposes - its the duality of investigating and being on a cruise in a shirt. The bright red ties into the red and blue first responder colour way the show uses (for obvious reasons) while the white and the palm fronds, the lei flowers and the watery theming of the pattern fit into the troipical cruise they're on.

Bobbys red shirt contrasts with the lavender that we see on Athena - its not a colour we see on Bobby all that often and that makes its use all the more important. Especially considering the entire cruise thus far we've seen him in blues and greens - especially pale closer to pastel tones.

This red is bright snd bold and unlike his usual choices. Red is a colour of cross meaning - there is obviously the connection with love and the heart, which is absolutely at play her - his love for Athena is spurring him on and is part of what is pushing him in to investigator Bobby mode - and its representation of love is what is going to be the key player in the up coming episodes on the ship - when he is looking for Athena during the evacuation etc. But the other meaning of red is war, courage and anger and that is very much present here in this episode, and will (i'm assuming) be later on in 7x02 and 3.

The other thing I think its worth pointing out at this point (which is pure conjecture on my part at this moment in time but that I think will become relevant in the next two episodes rather than this one) is the foreshadowed parallel with Buck in season 5 when he broke down Eddies door. The bright red we saw him wearing then was an uncommon colour for him, in the same way it is for Bobby here. It's paralleling the way Buck was prepared to go into battle for Eddie, with the way Bobby is prepared to do so for Athena - going to war for your closest person, your loved one and doing what you need to do to save them.

Putting Athena in lavender the moment she gets to go into cop mode was a choice that had me giggling! Lavender is a colour of relaxation and order so for her to start wearing it the moment she gets to start being a cop again - speaks volumes for her state of being - it shows that her fear of being on the cruise ship and of being alone with bobby, has been overridden by her need to do her job and start investigating things. Its the perfect colour for this moment and for the impeding trouble brewing on the ship - Athena will bring order to things as order has been restored to her inner world.

Hopefully you've enjoyed this little canter through the costumes of 7x01 we're back in business and I can't wait to read your comments in the tags and comments 🥰

Tagging for those who've asked to be tagged - drop me a comment on this post if you'd like to be added to the list for the next meta 😎

@theladyyavilee @mistmarauder @xxfiction-is-my-realityxx @mandzuking17 @spotsandsocks @loveyou2thecore @wanderingwomanwondering @oneawkwardcookie @leothil @copyninjabuckley @nathleigh @shammers86 @crazyfangirlallert @missmagooglie @inandoutoffocus @katyobsesses @radiation-run @gayandbifiremenofmine @lemotmo @bi-moonlight @satvojihusana @crazyaboutotps @princesschez75 @mongreloer @alliaskisthepossibilityoflove @sherlocking-out-loud

#911 abc #I hope you enjoy!#its good to be back #I can't remember my costume tags 😂#911 costume meta #season 7 #s7 costumes #7x01 #Kym costume meta #Kym colour theory #911 costumes #long post #the costume department never fails #still feeling feral about so much of the stuff I got right and the new stufff I've spotted

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corruptedcaps · 2 months

Text

Wedding Hells

Abby was happy she finally managed to convince her best friend Lindsay to not marry her fiancé James. Abby had learned that James was secretly the head of the crime family in town and was involved in every dirty deal going.

As happy as Abby was, James was pissed. When Abby came over to pick up some of Lindsay’s belongings he made she sure she knew.

“Well if it isn’t the do gooder little friend who tricked my fiancé into leaving me. I hope you’re proud.” He said with venom.

“Tricked her? I told her the truth of who you really are you creep and soon I’m going to tell everyone as well. Your days not behind bars are numbered.” Abby said straight to his face expecting to see him bubble up with rage but instead he broke into a smile.

“You have a fire and strength in you I had noticed before. You’ll do just am fine as my wife instead.” He said walking over to Lindsay’s never worn dress.

“You’ve lost it now, good luck with your life, or should I say you’re 25 to life.” She said turning on her heel. However within a feel feet she felt the white fabric of the wedding dress draped over her head. Within seconds it seemed to come alive and squeeze down her body.

“What... the... hell...” Abby said trying to rip it off her but found it was too tight.

“You see Lindsay never knew about who I really was but she was going to be my second in command in my growing criminal empire. I had big expansion plans but needed someone I knew would be loyal and ruthless. That’s where this magic dress came in.” James said matter of factly as Abby continued to struggle.

The dress had started to push off her clothes and toss them aside as it enveloped her body and sealed her in. She was quickly dressed as a bride to be but that’s when the real changes began.

The dress constricted her stomach making it hard to breath for a second. However Abby soon felt her belly shrink to match the tight waist of the dress. It actually felt good.

“Oh what are you doing to me you bastard! It feels... it feels... so goooood.” She moaned as her chest heaved outward as two massive tits grew outward from her modest pair.

“You don’t think I became kingpin without the help of the dark arts do you? Soon you’ll understand. When you become the Queenpin.” James said laughing.

Abby should of been furious with him but for some reason she was more turned on then ever before. The word Queenpin making her wet everything she thought it.

“Oh fuck I hate you James you big dick fuck! Once I’m free of this I’m going to fuck your brains out! Wait noooo! I don’t want that! I neeeeed that. No this is wrong!” She said moaning again as her conflicted emotions fought each other.

“You’re right, this is wrong but doesn’t it feel so good to be bad? No more morals, no more caring what anyone thinks? Just taking what you deserve, which is everything! Embrace it Abby, embrace being a bitch!” He said, tempting her.

Abby’s body continued to change as her mind was at war with itself. Her skin took on a healthy tan, sexy makeup was applied generously to her face. Her hair became thick, long and luxurious.

If there hadn’t been a mirror nearby that day, she might have saved her soul. As her eyes made contact with her reflection she found herself drawn into the cold, permanent bitch faced, goddess that was staring back. James was right, she thought, why should she not have everything she ever wanted? A beauty like her deserved the world and if wasn’t going to be given it she would need to take it.

As the good parts of her psyche were replaced by her new meaner, more cutthroat persona her struggling ceased. Her posture straighten into a classical pose and all resistance faded. Her lips curled into a wicked smile as she eyed James not with disgust any longer but with desire.

“Abby? That’s such a childish name. It’s Abigail from now on. Do I look like some immature child?” She said arching herself against a wall so she could shove out her butt. James mouth was agape.

“Sweetheart you’ll catch flies looking like that, how about you come over here and use it on more expensive tastes?” She said with a purr dripping in lust. James didn’t waste any time as he quickly grabbed her and kissed her deeply. Abigail moaned softly as he did, loving how he tasted. Lindsay had always said he was a good lover and now she was about to find out.

Removing the dress, Abigail found herself in some sexy white lingerie, a by product of the magic dress. She pushed James onto the nearby bed and posed sexily for him.

“When we fuck darling, I don’t want to hear Abby, or Abigail come from that mouth of yours. I want to hear only Queenpin, understand?” Abigail said authoritatively, making James get harder.

“Of course… Queenpin.” Her growled making her as wet as he was hard. Strutting over to him she took out his impressive cock and lowered her tight pussy on top.

“Mmmm a perfect fit… Kingpin.” She purred as she started to rise up and down.

The next few hours were a blur of sexual juices, screaming and grunting. By the time they were done Abigail had forgotten ever being Abby. In her mind she had always been Abigail, a tough and brutal but also outrageously beautiful crime boss.

James had planned on telling his men to fall in line and treat her like a boss too but she slipped into the role so easily that they were too scared to disobey her. Within a week she had doubled James’ profits with her ruthless ways. While James was a perfectly cruel and calculating leader, Abigail was literally created to be bad. She was the model of evil.

However not everyone was as impressed as James, namely his ex-fiancée and Abby’s old best friend, Lindsay. She confronted Abigail one day on the street and pleaded with her to tell her what had been done to her but Abigail just looked at her coldly.

“Do I know you? Regardless no one speaks to me like that, I am Queenpin of this city and I could have you disappeared like that.” She said snapping her fingers. When she did, her two burly bodyguards seized Lindsay and threw her into the trunk of Abigail’s luxury tow car.

Sliding in Abigail smirked as she heard the muffled banging of Lindsay.

“It’s no use dear, even if anyone heard you they’re all too afraid to say anything. You don’t have that fear but you will soon. Once I break you you’ll be employed indefinitely as my new live in maid and sex slave. You’re exactly what I need to help me prepare for my upcoming wedding.” Abigail said callously as she put on her designer sunglasses and her driver headed towards her mansion.

THE END

#f2f #corruption #bitchification #magic #evil bitch #corrupted clothing #evil couple

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lani-heart · 3 months

Text

|| series masterlist || next // previously

parings -> ( eventually ) enhypen x reader genre -> soulmate au, fantasy au, angst warnings -> angst, rejection word count -> 2.2k

abstract -> misunderstandings built on lies from...

niki's perspective

y/n quit the council and everything was going downhill… Wonyoung was now president and she was clearly overwhelmed with work, event planning, classes, and helping everyone else…

She was holding off elections for her replacement for vice president but she held out hope y/n would take the position again.

Jungwon got a bit better and took on the president’s duties again but was quieter than usual and even avoided us… Sunoo wasn’t how he normally was, he would be quiet too and ignore everyone

Sunghoon has been getting treatment from the nurses by taking medication to silence his wolf… but all three were still clearly affected by the rejection…

Sooha tries to cheer them up but they ignore her… besides Sunghoon who still tries to force his feelings. Jake has been trying to talk to three to feel better but Jungwon and Sunoo don’t seem to care…

Sunoo even used his powers on Jake…

Everything was getting out of control. Even Heeseung was disappearing from our dorm… Jay has been trying to take care of everyone but everything was a big mess.

I knocked on her door when… “Heeseung?” I asked and I saw the older boy open our soulmate’s door.

“She’s asleep and I was just leaving,” he said and I was left frozen and confused… “I’ve been taking care of her�� Wonyoung and Eunchae asked me to help y/n sleep since she hasn’t been as recently” he explained and I sighed.

“Hyung, we need to fix this!” I said and he sighed. “We can't,” he said and I scoffed. “You want to keep her for yourself now/?! You reject–" "Niki… if all of us can’t accept the bond none of us can be her soulmate,” he said and it made sense but impossible…

“Sunoo and Jungwon were happy being with her while you all chased Sooha,” I said and he sighed. “The mate bond will always reach out even if she's only been bonded to two of us” he explained.

“Besides, she still doesn’t trust me… she's just too tired to fight the soulmate bond. In fact, she’s a bit scared to approach any of us” he said and I felt a pang in my chest…

“Let her rest, at least for now”

We went back to the dorm where I saw Jay trying to convince Jungwon and Sunoo to eat… they haven’t drunk blood either.

The school mandated all vampires to feed once a week to avoid accidents… but they haven’t fed for over a week.

“You two are gonna hurt some–” “Are you sure you should be telling us that” Sunoo cut Jake off who sighs and stopped talking…

Hyung, she should at least talk to them

I said in my mind and he sighed…

“Soon”

The next day it was the same… Sunoo and Jungwon have been getting irritable by the day.

I decided to not listen to Heeseung and went to her room again where this time she opened it and froze.

She was conflicted…. She wanted to close the door but didn’t. “Can we talk?” I asked and I heard how her heart raced… besides that, she nodded and let me enter.

“Did I ever tell you what my power is?” I asked and she flinched, making me a bit sad.

“I control shadows and I can teleport,” I said and I saw her eyes glimmer at least a little. I made the silhouette of a cat, she seemed to smile a bit.

“Can people touch them?” she asked and I shook my head. “No but I can… anything I want I can make alive in the shadows,” I said and she nodded.

“I know you aren’t here to show me shadow magic, Niki,” she said and I smiled softly. “Has Heeseung explained what's been going on with us?” I asked and she shook her head.

“No… he said you all agreed with leaving me alone. That it’d be better to reject the soulmate bond completely” she said and I felt my eyes widen.

“No! I didn’t agree with that… Jungwon and Sunoo haven’t either. We thought you didn’t want to see any of us so Jungwon and Sunoo respected what you wanted” I said and she shook her head.

“I miss them,” she said and I sighed. “Then why’d you reject them?” I asked and she shook her head. “I was told the pain would go away if I rejected them… it didn't, it still hurts' ' she said as she rubbed her bandages… Jake really did hurt her badly.

“y/n they miss you so much… they won't eat nor drink blood. They’ll attack someone and get kicked out if this continues” I said and her eyes widened.

“And Wonyoung has been juggling everything. We haven’t had a meeting since you last were in council” I said and she shook her head. “She told me she hired a vice president already,” she said and I shook my head.

“That girl… everyone was lying to me” she pouted. “I know… but I just want everything to be back like it was before,” I said and she sighed.

“I do too… but Jake” she said and I smiled.

“He’ll never hurt you again… he won’t even get close,” I said wanting to touch her but I needed to be gentle with her which she smiled softly instead. She got closer as she hugged me and I felt sparks and everything that soulmates say they feel.

“Then I'll fix everything” she whispered and I hugged her back smiling to myself.

How could he ever hurt someone as perfect as you?

y/n’s perspective

No more moping! No more cowering No more avoiding my responsibility!

I was in my uniform and went to the council room for the first time in almost two weeks… I haven't even been in class due to feeling down. I can't disappoint any more people.

“No! Don’t you understand how to be vice president?! I explained it to you so many times already!” I heard and I saw Wonyoung hysterically yell at a new council member.

She looks to be a freshman…

“I don’t think anyone can be a better vice president than you, Wonnie,” I said and she turned to me and looked relieved. “y/n!!” she said as she tackled me in a hug.

“Are you finally back?” EJ asked and I nodded.

“We’ve got work to do right?”

It took all afternoon to finish but we finished it with help from Riverfield.

“So you're back to being president right?” Taki asked and I nodded. “Good, because Wonyoung was getting a little too crazy,” Maki said and I had to agree.

She seemed very stressed and all the paperwork needed to be redone because of it.

“Where are you going now?” K asked and I sighed. “To fix some things,” I said and he nodded. “Be careful” he said and I nodded.

I went to the vampire / human council room. I took a deep breath when I knocked. “Sangyeon for the last time we agreed– y/n?” Sunoo answered the door quite aggressively yelling at who he thought was poor Sangyeon… Would I have been scared of Sunoo if I wasn’t determined to fix our bond? Maybe… but I couldn’t help but smile at the boy who looked too shocked.

“I need to talk to you and Jungwon,” I said and he nodded. I saw the boys inside now look at us but Jungwon followed immediately. They looked so pale, and their eyes had a crimson color to them for not feeding.

They closed the door waiting for me to speak first… “Wanna go to the cafeteria?” I asked and they nodded. “Let me tell them what they need to do, I'll catch up,” Jungwon said rather quickly before rushing back in.

“y/n,” Sunoo said and before we started walking I hugged him… “I missed you both” I said and he hugged me tighter. “Not more than we did you,” he said and I even felt water droplets fall on my shirt.

“Come on let's go get some food”

Jungwon caught up as I made the two drink blood bags. They were no longer pale nor had red in their eyes.

“I’m sorry,” I said and they shook their heads. “What Jake did was stupid and we understand you didn't want–” “I did want to see you both… Heeseung told me you guys didn’t want to see me” I said and they both looked confused.

“What? We never said that… he said you wanted space” Jungwon said and I smiled softly. “Then why did you reject us?” Sunoo asked and I shook my head.

“Our bond wasn’t rejected, it was temporarily broken… Wonyoung did a spell to break our bond so the pain of getting hurt by one of my soulmates wouldn’t hurt. I wanted to fix it but I was too tired and a little scared to approach you both… but then Heeseung said you guys didn’t want to see me” I confessed and they looked mad.

“We never wanted that…” Sunoo said and I nodded. I asked for their hands in which they intertwined with mine and I fixed our bond. “I’m sorry for the misunderstanding,” I said and they shook their heads.

“It's not your fault. If breaking the bond took away at least some of the pain then don’t feel sorry. It was Jake's fault anyway” Jungwon said and Sunoo nodded. “And then Heeseung for not letting us see you,” Sunoo added.

“I missed you both so much”

jungwon’s perspective

Sunoo and I didn’t show it but we were mad… mad that Heeseung would keep us away from our own soulmate.

“You’re a bastard!” Sunoo yells at Heeseung who looks at us confused and as Jay tries to calm us down his eyes widen. “Let me explain–” “Explain?! What do you need to explain!?” Sunoo yelled.

“You told her we didn’t want to be with her… you don’t get to make decisions for us” I said and he shook his head. “You don’t get it, do you? As long as one of us rejects the bond we’ll always be here… she’ll constantly get hurt” Heeseung said and I scoffed.

“Stop fighting all of you, please?” Sooha begged and Sunoo glared at the girl. She was my friend who I did care about but… Sunoo has been avoiding her recently.

He’s been slowly hating Sooha’s presence… he thinks that y/n is upset by her which she is and as a soulmate, he wants to protect her…

“Then tell her once and for all” Sunoo said and they shook their heads. “Sunghoon? You’ll be in pain forever if you don’t end this” Sunoo said and the wolf-vampire hybrid looked at the human-vampire hybrid with sad eyes…

“Sooha–” “Stop” Jake stopped Sunghoon from telling the truth… “For what? For you to threaten our soulmate again? For you to hurt her for someone who doesn’t love you?” Sunoo said and I tried calling the boy down but he wouldn't… this was his last straw

I almost didn’t want to stop him… they would go as far as to see us in pain just to keep our soulmate away? For her to be in pain for Sooha?

“Sunoo, what are you saying?” Sooha asked and Jake was now in front of her coaxing her that there was nothing going on…

“y/n is all our soulmate… and you want to know why she hates you so much? Why do her friends hate you so much?!” Sunoo yelled, making the girl now look at us confused…

“Because Sooha… these four love you. In fact, they love you so much that they’ll reject their own soulmate for you! That Jake would even go as far as to hurt her for you!” “SHUT UP SUNOO” Jake yelled…

“W-what? No… this is a prank” Sooha said in shock. The four older boys instead looked at her with puppy eyes… “I liked you guys too… I probably still do but–” “Then nothing else… I don’t like y/n like that I never will '' Jake said and she shook her head.

“I love K,”

taglist -> @sunus-sun @loumin908 @on-1ce @shinkenprincess-oh @b-a-nshee-blog @bnnyniky @sakuxxi @chiiiiiiiiis @cncreams @pre1ttyies @justanunstablefrog @graythecoffeebean @starzniiky @singlepringle4you @chirokookie @kthstrawberryshortcake-main @imtoanonymousforyou @lovgfrd @ilovecheese09 @sousydive @pink-but-rosie @kyleebob @jihyosgf @in-somnias-world @jilxxasu @bee-the-loser

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justmystical · 2 months

Text

The Forgotten- 1

Pairing: Lucifer x Butterfly!fem!reader

Fandom: Hazbin Hotel x Star vs the forces of evil

Warnings: Pre-season of Hazbin hotel, Alternative Universe

Two | Navigation

(Name) Butterfly is the Second Princess of Mewni and the Younger Sister of Queen Eclipsa.She has long red hair ,light Turquoise eyes and red round shaped marks on her cheeks.

Being the second Princess she didn't experience using her Family Relic,the Magic wand of the Butterflies that was pass down to generations to generations. Ofcourse she already knew from the beginning she wouldn't wield it. However her late Mother Queen Solaria the Monster Carver requested that she would given a replica of the family wand.

When her Mother was alive she would always want to protect her two daughters,so when she reigned Mewni she requested to the Embodiment of the Magic Book of there family to make a replica for her Protection.Just when her sister turned fourteen she received it.

She was thankfull for her mother's gift even though it was the last gift she ever received from her.

When she touched her wand it turned to a key like wand.She also found out that she can turn it to a necklace,she expect what would happen next...

She was mourning her mother's death and wanted someone to comfort her, suddenly her tears fell from her eyes to her wand and it lit up.

That surprised her very much and watched as the one ascend through the air and watch it transforms to a cat?!

This was the best thing that happened to her in weeks after her mother's death, a cat that was loyal to her and comforted her in hours mourning. It felt she felt and she decided to name her KeeKee.

Timeskip

You were currently having breakfast with your sister and her husband, yeah you never did like Shastacan or what's his name. You see him as rude and so full of himself,so you really don't how your sister survives him. If you were her you would rather feed yourself to monsters.

"So n/n how's your lesson with Glossaryck been going?"Your sister Eclipsa asked you, you stopped eating and looked at your sister "well, to be completely honest sister?poor Glossaryck is having a hard time"i giggled and Eclipse joined in"my,my sister don't give him a hard time"

You saluted and she laughed again, You and Your sister were always close but sometimes you feel like she hiding something from you.

As Breakfasts came to an end, you said goodbye to my sister and well except for Shastacan.

You removed your necklace and let transform into a cat " hewo Keekee"you said in a baby voice and she rubbed her head on your hand.

"should we visit another dimension?i think Glossaryck is going with sister today"You told her" and i may have stolen a portal scissor , don't tell anyone okay"

You went to your room to change into something comfortable, you put on a cloak and gotten everything you need ready.

Keekee transforms back into a key necklace as you put the hood of the cloak on. You cut the air to open a portal.

Earth

You visited here multiple times cause you a curious Princess.

Here it was so different from Mewni,its very interesting to say the least.

You explored more around and Keekee already transformed earlier as she guide you through the paths,she was given to you like she was your babysitter as some people joke.

You were to busy looking around you didn't noticed Keekee to be distracted to something.When you finally noticed you ran try to find your beloved pet.

"Keekee?where are you girl?" You shouted and looked around until you saw her in the hands of a blonde short man with a top hat he was sitting down by a tree.

It looked like Keekee was comforting him like she comforted you..

You walked closer to get a glimpse of the man he had the most beautiful face you ever seen and you were shocked to see he had similar marks on the cheeks like yours.

"hello?"you said which made the man jumped in surprise.

He looked at you and you remove your hood"hi?"he replied voice hoarse.

Was he crying?

Keekee saw you and rubbed herself on your leg"oh is this your cat?"you nodded.

"well I didn't know sorry..."

"it's alright,it seemed like you needed it..."you said"can i sit down with you?"he looked confused but nodded.

"hasn't anyone told you about stranger danger?"he asked and i laughed.

"well i like danger and it looks like you could use someone to talk to...my cat doesn't usually comfort any other people... she's like a detector for people who need a little help" you trailed off looking at Keekee.

"how can you be sure i need someone?"

"well,Keekee does and i trust my feline companion"

He laughed and it was like music to your ears.

"I'm (Name) by the way , what's yours?"

He froze and looked hesitant in telling you his name.

"it's umm.."

You looked at him with a confused face

"it's Lucifer..."he fully expect for you to run away.

But you didn't and smiled.

"nice to meet you Lucifer"

Lucifer yet again had to suffer his punishment. Only seeing the bad of his doings, he was summoned by a bunch of people devoted to him. They had sacrificed a lamb , baby lamb.

He can't endure this.. he only want people to have freedom and this is the consequences he got.

He teleported out out of that part of the forest and sat by a trying to maintain his breathing.

He sobbed for this retched cursed upon him.

Until he heard a meowing and saw a cat walking towards him at first he was scared to harm this little creature.

But It seems like it wasn't scared of him and for awhile it comforted him.

"KeeKee!"

He heard a luring voice but didn't moved an inch.

Until the girl greeted him,he was hesitant in interacting with this girl.

For some reason this girl is giving a source of good energy, not only that she was also gorgeous.

At the end he thought she would ran away from his name. But for some reason this girl seem confused at my hesitantion

How odd...

A/n: i know Keekee is the embodiment of the hotel but for the sake of this story and it's an alternative universe

#hazbin hotel lucifer x reader #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel keekee #lucifer morningstar #x reader #lucifer x reader #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel x you #svtfoe #star vs the forces of evil #eclipsa butterfly #the forgotten

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petday · 3 months

Note

whats little magic?

It is a puzzle game for the Super Famicom and Game Boy Color video game systems. I like the Game Boy Color game much more for its art direction, and it's also just more fun for me to play with the 'bubble magic' mechanic in that version. I wrote more about my enjoyment below, in case anyone is curious.

The game’s box art is very beautiful, right? It caught my eye right away. The in-game 'cutscene' artwork appears to be carefully-made pixel art versions of the same artist's illustrations and they are similarly beautiful. (Sorry in advance if my photograph quality is not great.)

But the actual levels themselves look very haphazard. Clashing colors and tiles. It's easy enough to guess that a blue tile next to a white tile represents water and snow, respectively, but what does the yellow cluster-of-boxes tile represent? Yellow bricks of a tower…? How about the spike-y objects in the snow-water levels? I guessed they were underwater mines, but then there's the same tile in a later level too, just palette-swapped to be red… The two monochrome tiles in the third picture above teleports your character, but it has a two-frame animation that made me think of an ‘industrial grinder’ and ‘static noise’, so I assumed it was dangerous at first. Was it intended to be nondescript ‘sparkly magic’? Where are all of these levels taking place, anyway? No other humans are in these areas, just various animals and vague environmental indicators. There are cute snakes in some ‘yellow brick’ levels that end your life upon touching them. Seems irresponsible for a teacher to allow her student into perilous areas, no matter how eager she is to pass her final exam at magic school and become a magician.

Oh, I should explain the story. (None of the above photos are in sequence, just wanted to show more of the game.) The story is about a girl who attends magic school, and aims to pass a series of tests to become a full-fledged magician. Her teacher encourages her. The lack of explanation in the story is another fun point for me. Her magic teacher doesn't explain why 'learning magic' consists of pushing a heart into a heart-shaped hole that triggers a staircase to appear, which is what you need to do to complete each level. (It’s a beating heart – is it alive?) No explanation as to why snakes end your life instantly upon touching them. The context of 'because you want to pass your exams, a teacher is putting you through trials to help you become a master of magic’ isn’t an adequate explanation, because the teacher also tells you that she has not passed the final exam - why is a teacher putting a student through something that is too difficult even for herself? Who is in control of all of the strange areas you need to ‘complete’ in order to become a real magician, then? (After you complete the game with the student, you can play a different set of levels as the teacher, but even the usual sparse context-giving ‘cutscenes’ are not there… Mysterious…)

So, all of that is why my drawing about ‘Little Magic’ is about ‘confusion’, ‘going along with something that makes sense at first, but quickly unravels to not make sense any longer’, ‘growing distrust of authoritative figures’, and ‘frustration from stagnation.’ https://petday.tumblr.com/post/730315736066768896

Maybe the instruction booklet explains everything; I did not have access to that while playing, and I like that feeling. ‘Renting a game from a video game rental store that did not come with an instruction booklet, and being perplexed by it, forced to create your own context because you have nothing else’ feeling. Randomly selecting games to play that do not have much documentation online is enjoyable to me, because of that feeling.

A fan translation group translated the Game Boy Color game from Japanese to English in 2018. There wasn't a lot of dialogue in the first place, though. I like games where there is little to no dialogue because one can imagine a story/context besides what is shown. Up until 2022, I could not find a solution for the teacher’s final puzzle, so I interpreted the ending of the game’s story as, ‘The magic teacher thought she could harness a type of magic far stronger than what she could handle, accidentally designed an impossible puzzle for herself and is trapped for eternity.’ Of course, the puzzle has a solution, but I wanted to honour my strange interpretation regardless. When I play games and have weird interpretations of them, I am definitely not saying, 'I bet this is what the people who worked on this game were thinking!' I dislike that attitude. It's just imaginative interpretation, and working with the odd way I interact with things in order to maximize fun for myself…

A part about old games that I also love, is that they can never be updated; they had one chance to release a finished game, and maybe another chance to fix glitches in a re-release if they sold very many copies the first time. I greatly enjoyed the ‘imperfect’ tilesets and abrupt feeling of this game, which might have been ‘improved’ in a patch if it had been released in recent years instead of 1999.

(I wasn’t sure where to include this point, but I must also say, my favourite YouTube comments are about someone’s unusual interpretations of a game, when they did not have access to a guide at the time. I read one recently – the comment author and their brother rented ‘Final Fantasy IV’ from a rental store, and they did not know about the ‘Poison’ status effect that depletes the characters health. There is a strange pixelation effect and a ringing sound when you walk around the overworld while poisoned. Because the save file they were playing from was during a point of the game where you visit the moon, and because of the unfamiliar visual and sound effect, they interpreted the ‘Poison’ status effect as, “The moon must be running out of air.” Things like that are beautiful to me.)

(I also wasn’t sure where to put this point, but the main character, May, from ‘Little Magic’, is stylized differently in some ‘cutscenes’. She resembles a dragon to me. It’s cute.)

#long post

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yelena-bellova · 1 year

Text

Twenty Years Later: Joel Miller x F!Reader - Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Sixteen: The Great Sin

Plot: Joel and Y/n, separated once again, are told the truth about the cost that will come with creating a cure.

Word Count: 7.4k

Warnings: canon violence, drug abuse, language, blood, guns, needles, loss of a child, ptsd, (16+)

A/N: Well, we’re almost to the end 🥲 I can’t believe there’s only one chapter after this and then it’s over. Rather than think about that, I’m going to focus on letting y’all enjoy this one ❤️

As always, this series is 16+ and I will not be adding anyone to the taglist that does not have their age/range in their bio. This is also the last chance to be added to the list!

Alrighty, let’s finish it out strong, y’all ❤️❤️❤️

—————

Y/n woke with her head throbbing.

Before her eyes even opened, her brain splitting from the pain she couldn’t remember earning. In the darkness of her lids, she slowly drew on her last fuzzy memories.

Puns.

Flash bomb.

Ellie screaming.

Y/n’s eyes flew open, pushing up on her elbow and feeling a stab of pain through her abdomen.

“I wouldn’t do that if I were you.”

Blinking until her vision was clear, Y/n looked across to room to see Marlene leant up against the wall.

“We gave you a shot for your ribs,” she continued, “But it’s not magic.”

“Yeah, well, maybe you should’ve put out a PSA,” Y/n replied groggily, the force of the flash bomb coming back to her.

Marlene smiled thinly, “Could’ve found a phone along the way.”

Y/n bristled at the joke, relieved to see her comrade alive.

“Gotta admit,” Marlene crossed her arms, “I didn’t expect to see you all in one piece. Figured you’d either run into raiders or you and Joel would go the double-homicide route.”

Y/n held her belly as she attempted to sit up. “Almost did,” she groaned, “A few times.”

“Well,” Marlene gestured to Y/n, watching her with honest eyes, “I underestimated you. You did good.”

Y/n wanted to accept the praise, having finally proven herself as a fighter, but was single-minded in her thoughts. “Where’s Joel?”

“Recovering in another room,” Marlene answered, “His vitals are good, just hasn’t woken up yet.”

Nodding, Y/n carefully swung her legs over the side of the bed, ”When he wakes up, tell him to come find me? Ellie’s probably worried sick…”

“Where are you going?” Marlene asked.

Y/n stopped to take a breath, whatever medicine they’d given her hadn’t kicked in yet. “To see Ellie,” she answered plainly, “She’s okay, right?”

Marlene sighed with dread, knowing whatever was about to happen wouldn’t be pleasant. But she also had a one-track mind, and it was humming a different tune than Y/n’s.

“She’s fine,” she replied, her tone having shifted to instill a false calm, “She’s being prepped for surgery.”

Y/n’s brow furrowed in confusion, “Surgery? I thought they were just taking her blood?”

“It’s…” Marlene said with a heaviness to her tone, “A little more complicated than that.”

Even though the ache in Y/n’s temples was dizzying, it didn’t take her long to connect the dots as to why it would require surgery to facilitate the vaccine.

And she felt the floor go out from under her when she did.

She looked up to Marlene, barely able to even shake her head, “No…”

Marlene bit her lip, turning her gaze from Y/n and to the floor.

“No…” Y/n repeated, her voice low, “N-no…you wouldn’t.”

Marlene’s painful silence sliced through her.

“Are you kidding me?” Y/n’s volume grew loud with anger, giving her the strength to stand, “You made me risk my life for that girl for three fucking months just so you can kill her?!”

“She wouldn’t have come here with anyone other than you,” Marlene replied calmly, “She trusts you.”

“So you used me,” Y/n’s eyes widened with rage, “You knew I cared about her, you knew I’d do it.”

“You’re not looking at the big picture,” Marlene interjected, taking a step forward but not moving any closer to Y/n, “We get the vaccince, we save millions. We save the millions to come. We can bring the world back to what-“

The rest of Marlene’s words died to the ringing in Y/n’s ears. She braced one of her hands against her bed, feeling as if her knees were going to buckle.

Throughout her time in the Fireflies, Marlene had never entrusted Y/n with as much information as other recruits. It wasn’t for doubt of Y/n’s interests, but rather Marlene thinking Y/n was incapable of handling it. She’d always been slow to pull the trigger, something that had in any other world would have made her merciful. Marlene had only ever seen it as weakness.

Marlene’s opinion of Y/n wasn’t lost on her, she felt it on a daily basis. But to make her travel from one side of the country to another, witholding the sickening truth of what she was doing from her, that was a new brand of cruel.

“She’s going to fix everything,” were the first words of Marlene’s that broke through Y/n’s spinning thoughts.

Her head shot up, staring daggers at Marlene, “You don’t get to make that decision for her.”

“And you do?” Marlene replied, “What gives you the right to choose her fate?”

“Did you ask her?” Y/n inquired, the building rage beginning to seep out of her, “No, y’know what? I can tell by your face that you didn’t.”

“She doesn’t know,” Marlene could feel control over the conversation slipping, she needed to deescalate it quickly, “She’s not going to feel anything.”

“YOU’RE KILLING,” Y/n yelled as loud as her lungs would let her, “A FUCKING CHILD!”

At the last word, two guards stationed outside Y/n’s door marched in, their rifles cocked downards, but ready to strike.

Y/n was quickly starting to understand the gravity of her situation.

Marlene held out a hand to Y/n, as if trying to ease a carnivorous animal. “Do you think I want to do this? Do you not think that I’ve looked for any other option-“

“No,” Y/n shook her head, “I don’t think you have.”

“I knew her mother, Y/n,” Marlene spoke a little louder, “I was there when she was born, and I had to put a bullet in my best friend’s head because she was infected. I promised to keep her child safe. I do not want to do this,” she paused, collecting herself, “But it’s my only choice.”

Three months prior, hearing such a personal story would have meant something to Y/n. Now, it only served to illuminate the true colors of her comrade. Marlene, so blinded by her determination to restore the earth, had allowed her drive to turn to ruthlessness and morph into heartlessness.

“No,” Y/n said, fighting back tears at the thought of Ellie lying unconscious somehwere in the hospital, “Look me in the eye and tell me her mother would want this,” she waited, until impatience won out, “LOOK AT ME!”

Marlene was a lot of things, blunt was one of them. She looked up to Y/n’s red face, unaware of the storm her words were about to trigger, “You’re not her mother.”

The waves in Y/n’s body both crashed and fell at the statement. It was twenty years all over again.

“Take me to Joel,” she swallowed her tears, “I want to see Joel.” When Marlene averted her gaze once again, Y/n could feel some other essential piece of truth shift into darkness. “Marlene,” she gritted out, “Where’s Joel?”

“He’s gone,” Marlene answered, “He left as soon as he knew that you and Ellie were okay.”

Y/n lip quivered with fury, the lies were so clear now. Joel and her hadn’t gone through all they had, made the promises they did only for him to abandon her and Ellie. “No. He wouldn’t do that.”

“I don’t know what you want to hear,” Marlene said, “But he’s gone.”

It was then that Y/n realized she was no longer a Firefly, but a prisoner.

With the last shred of her future slipping being ripped away from her, Y/n’s fury took over. She lunged towards Marlene, one of the soldiers surging forward and shoving her back onto the bed. Y/n cried out in pain, clutching her stomach as the barrel of the rifle was drawn on her.

“Don’t,” Marlene ordered the guard, “She’s already hurt.”

Y/n could no longer hold in her sobs. Ellie had been fooled into dying for a solution they didn’t even know was guaranteed, Joel was being forced to leave them behind, and she was essentially being held hostage by those she’d once trusted with her life.

“You keep her here,” Marlene continued speaking to the guards as if the pain was too incapacitating for Y/n to have any presence of mind, “Lock the doors. Don’t let her out until she calms down.”

Still weeping from both the ache in her ribs and the turn of events, Y/n nearly didn’t open her eyes when she heard Marlene’s boot steps come towards her.

“I know you care about her,” Marlene said softly, “She cares about you too. But there’s such a thing as caring too much…and I’m sorry.”

Through her tears, Y/n watched as her one-time friend walked out the door, washing her hands of the matter.

“You motherfucker,” Y/n growled, getting her feet as the guards exited the room, “You fucking murderer!”

As the door shut and locked on her, Y/n began to bang her fists against the 8x10 pane of glass, “YOU FUCKING MURDERER! YOU MOTHERFUCKING MURDERER!”

Y/n screamed at the top of her lungs, hot tears pouring down her face as three months of love and care wilted at her feet.

—————————

In reality, Joel was on the next floor down, fighting for his, Y/n and Ellie’s futures. He knew that the love of his life would never roll over and allow them to take Ellie’s life.

“Where’s Y/n?”

Marlene sighed at the question, contrary to what she was sure her reputation was, deception didn’t come easily to her. But she did what she had to for her cause.

There had always been a fire in Y/n, however tamed it was by her more virtuous qualities. Marlene had kept a careful eye on the blaze, never thinking it would spread too far. But there’d been a change in Y/n since they’d last seen each other in Boston, and she was certain her love for Ellie and time spent with Joel had brought it out in her. If they had survived three months in the ruins of civilization, they were dangerous. They needed to be kept apart if the surgery was to be a success.

“She’s decided to stay,” Marlene locked in her story, “She wants to see this through all the way.”

Joel didn’t believe for 1/8th of a second that Y/n would have lied to him. He’d looked in her eyes and watched twenty years of history dance across her irises. He could feel the weight of their future inside his chest, glowing gold with hope. There was no way after all they’d been through that she would walk away from him, just like that…

“No, you take me to ‘em,” he demanded, rising from the bed, “You take me to ‘em right now!”

One of Marlene’s guards came forward and used the butt of his rifle to knock him to the ground. Joel grunted and coughed on his hands and knees, his mind spinning with fear.

“Please,” he begged of Marlene, “You don’t understand.”

“I do,” Marlene said solemnly, reciting a less emotional variation of the story she’d told Y/n five minutes prior, “I was there when she was born, Joel. I promised her mom that I would save her child, I promised,” she paused to swallow back the lump rising in her throat, “So I do understand. I’m the only one who understands. I’m sorry,” she shook her head, “I have no other choice.”

Joel was a lot of things, but a coward wasn’t one of them. He glared up at Marlene, subtly threatening, “I do.”

Marlene looked exasperated, like his fight was some obstacle in her path to roll her eyes at. “Walk him out to the highway,” she ordered the soldiers, “Leave him there with his pack. Give him this,” she unclipped Ellie’s pocketknife from her belt, turning her stare to Joel, “He tries anything…shoot him.”

Joel, dazed from the knowledge that Ellie and Y/n were being held somewhere, was forced to his feet. The soldiers pushed him out of the room, picking his backpack up on the way out, and shoved him down the hall.

All the while, Joel was carefully constructing his plan.

—————————

Y/n sat with her back to the door, twisting her arm to hit the wood with what little energy she had left. She had sobbed and screamed to be let out until her voice was rendered raw.

She had failed. Failed Ellie. Failed Joel. Failed herself.

She wondered if this was her punishment for what she’d done to her family. If for each life she’d taken, she’d lose somebody in return.

She thought of Sarah, her death that seemed to be written in some fucked up universe’s stars, and how she ached for the future she’d never live. The proms, the graduations, coming home from college during holidays, getting engaged, getting married, having kids…all of it. Or none of it. Her choices would have determined her story and whichever path she’d have chosen, it would have been beautiful.

Ellie had been deprived of so many choices in life, and now she was being deprived of choosing whether she lived or died.

By deciding to let Ellie give her life for a cause that wasn’t even hers, the Fireflies were no better than FEDRA. Marlene was making the same calls that the government had made in the first few days of the outbreak. Who got to go to the QZs and who died in a ditch on the side of a road, whose life had lasting value and who was disposable. It sickened Y/n’s stomach and made her wish she had never joined at all.

Since meeting Ellie, Y/n had often contemplated the ghost of the girl’s mother. Having filled the role herself and feeling like Sarah had been carved from her own ribs, she couldn’t imagine what it was like to carry a child, birth her, and then lose her somewhere along the way…now, all she could think of was what Ellie’s mother would do if she were trapped as Y/n was. Would she fight? Would she break the glass with her fist and take on the guards? Or was she just cruel enough to sacrifice her daughter for the greater good? Could Y/n have left Sarah to die if, in some way, she’d held the key to the planet’s salvation?

Y/n took a deep breath, her mind the clearest it had been since waking up.

No parent would let their child die, no matter the circumstances.

And neither could she.

—————————

Joel paused in front of the hospital directory, eyes scanning over the levels and their corresponding departments. He was two floors away from pediatric surgery, and unknowingly, one floor away from where Y/n was being held.

“I didn’t hear anyone say ‘stop,’” one of the Fireflies behind him growled.

Joel glanced down the hall, “Which way?”

“Down the stairs,” the soldier answered, shoving Joel towards the stairwell.

With each flight Joel marched down, he was completing calculations in his mind. How quick did he have to move to take out both guardsmen? Which gun would be easier to reach? Did he rescue Ellie first or find Y/n and gain an extra pair of hands?

Once he decided, he let his steps slow until he came to a complete stop.

“The fuck are you doin’? Keep walking.”

Joel ignored the command.

“I said,” the Firefly grabbed Joel’s shoulder, “Keep walkin’-“

Lightning fast, Joel spun around, elbowing the man in the neck and knocking him to the floor. He nabbed his rifle as he fell, spinning around to shoot the second guard before he could even aim. Taking two steps back, he fired one shot into the first man’s leg.

“Fuck,” the soldier whimpered.

“Where are they?” Joel asked, his finger perfectly still against the trigger.

“Fuck you,” the Firefly growled.

Joel didn’t need his answer. Bill’s written words were etched in the caverns of his mind, about finding that one person to save. In Joel’s case, there were two people worth saving-

“I don’t have time for this,” he decided before planting a bullet in the man’s neck.

And he was doing it by any means necessary.

—————————

Y/n fiddled with her pocketknife in her hand, pacing the room as the pain in her ribs disappeared under the blanket of whatever medication Marlene had given her. She needed the guards outside her room to get pulled away so that she could pick the door’s lock. Once out, she had to steal a gun, find where Ellie was being held, figure out if Joel was still in the building and get them the hell out of dodge.

All she needed was a chance.

“Shots fired! Shots fired!”

The buzz of a radio caught Y/n’s ear, it pulled her to the door and she peered out the glass pane. The pencil stiff stance the soldiers had been maintaining was suddenly sharp with worry. One guard came running down the hall, shouting something Y/n couldn’t make out. Whatever it was caused her captors to charge down the hall as well. It was a threat that required every hand on deck.

Y/n nearly smiled, knowing exactly who could cause that kind of panic.

Slipping her blade into the lock, she fiddled with it until the door opened, freeing her. She threw her backpack over her shoulder, her eye catching on a tray balanced on the bedside table. It contained the used needle they’d already injected her with, plus one full syringe. Y/n picked up the two vials near the needles, one labeled ‘ibuprofen’ and one labeled ‘epinephrine.’

Y/n was weak, her body’s strength drained from trying to heal her ribs. There wasn’t any way she could fight her way out in her current state.

Without hesitation, she squeezed the flesh of her thigh and stabbed the needle through her jeans, discarding it on the floor after.

Drawing a deep breath, Y/n poked her head out the door, looking down each side of the hall before cutting across to the nurse’s station. She scanned the length of the counters for anything she could use as a weapon, finding only old papers and equipment. Distantly below her, she could hear gunfire.

“Hey,” a gruff voice shouted.

Y/n spun around, barely dropping to the floor before the Firefly soldier fired two shots at her. Crouched on the tile, she could feel the epinephrine beginning to kick in, bringing back the strength she’d lost in Silver Lake. She withdrew her knife once again, hiding behind the nurse’s station and listening to the footsteps of the Firefly come closer.

Y/n knew that to save what she loved, she would have to leave whatever was left of her humanity. The part of her that had hesitated to kill had to die by her own hands.

The soldier moved closer.

Closer…

The second his boot became visible, Y/n stabbed the knife through his foot, punching him in the chin when he bent down in pain. She got to her feet and ripped the rifle out of the Firefly’s hands, shooting him in the stomach after.

She stepped over his body, leaving him to bleed out.

—————————

Joel’s steps were inhumanly silent as he crept through the hospital. He fired each shot with machine-like precision, each Firefly falling to the floor, never to pick themselves back up.

Joel had killed countless times since the outbreak of Cordyceps and had felt a healthy dose of remorse. The innocent people he’d killed in his days as a Raider haunted him, much like they did Tommy, and he wasn’t sure he’d ever forget Y/n’s eyes as she’d watched him murder the FEDRA guard in Boston.

But as Joel stealthily made his way through the hospital, firing each bullet for the love of his life and the child they loved more than anything, he felt nothing.

—————————

Y/n had tried so hard to live as peacefully as the world would allow her. Despite joining the Fireflies, she never volunteered for first line of defense. If bombs were planted in the city, Y/n was the one counting them, not detonating them. As much as she’d hidden initially from Joel with bloody threats, she’d never committed any acts of violence unless they were absolutely necessary.

Marching down the hospital halls, tears pooled in her eyes with each kill she made until she was sobbing. Flashes of her parents, her siblings, her nephew, Sarah, played in her mind. Their innocence and their gruesome deaths she’d forever feel responsible for. Saving Ellie wouldn’t bring them back, but she couldn’t let another person she cared for die.

Red cheeked and puffy eyed, she murdered without hesitation, allowing love to turn her into a necessary monster.

—————————

Joel went from victim to victim, playing God and delivering their vicious, premature fates. Each time he ran out of ammo, he’d pick up the rifle of his last kill. It all flowed so sickeningly perfect.

He climbed the fourth floor stairwell, shooting the Fireflies attempting to sneak up on him before they knew what was going on. With his better ear, he could hear the gunfire on the floor he was approaching.

He wasn’t the only one putting up a fight.

As soon as Joel stepped onto the fifth floor, a barrage of bullets rained down around him. He ducked behind a wall, waiting for them to slow before running across to the other side of the hall. He let his ammo fly freely, taking down the Fireflies as sloppily as he needed to.

Just as he aimed at the final one, the soldier was kicked to the floor, Y/n stepping on his back and making a fatal shot.

Through his necessary numbness, Joel felt a rush of relief.

Y/n ignored every instinct she had to run into Joel’s arms and instead bent down, picking up the soldier’s rifle and the extra ammo off his belt. Joel did the same with a nearby body.

The two lovers met in the middle of the hall, their weapons resting against their chests, separating their bodies.

Twenty years ago, they were somewhere in a downtown bar, Joel trying to make her laugh and Y/n trying to pretend like she was perfectly capable of taking her eyes off of him. They were warm, they were happy, they were them.

Two decades later, they were stood in an abandoned hospital, rifles on their shoulders, blood on their clothes and vengeance in their eyes. They were bruised, they were broken, they were survivors.

They carried on the same way, shooting anyone who dared to get in their way as they climbed the building. Joel made the more gruesome kills, trying to spare Y/n what little pain he could, but Y/n was fearsome in her own right. The adrenaline from the epinephrine had heightened her senses, making her hyperaware of everything around her. If a Firefly so much as stepped an inch out from behind a wall, Y/n’s rifle was trained on him, not letting him live more than half a second.

Eventually, they made it.

The sixth floor.

With their sin all over them, Joel and Y/n walked down the hallway, passing the walls decorated with animal murals and creating a gruesome contrast. The glowing door at the end of the hall acted as their guiding light, the homing beacon they’d chased through the bloody battlefield they’d created.

Joel pushed the door open and they walked in, a window giving them a view into the operating room. Ellie was laid out on a table, a nurse was holding a gas mask to her face, drawing her into unconsciousness.

They were nearly too late.

Y/n, with adrenaline pumping through her veins, broke away from Joel and burst through the second set of doors. The doctor and nurses gasped in horror, jumping at the sudden sight.

“Unhook her,” Y/n growled, “Now.”

The doctor took a step towards Y/n, “How did you get in here?”

Joel was close behind her, Y/n’s speed drawing him out of his daze. “Unhook her,” he echoed.

The doctor nervously reached for a scalpel, holding it up to Joel and Y/n with shaking hands. “I won’t let you take her.”

He’d taken one step towards Y/n before Joel shot him, beating the epinephrine to protect her.

The nurses screamed and covered their ears, Y/n took it as her opportunity to move in on them.

“Un,” she enunciated, backing the women up towards Ellie’s bed, “Hook…her…now.”

“Move!” Joel shouted, keeping his gun drawn on them.

The nurses stepped to, unhooking Ellie’s various monitors and taking out her IV, a small stream of blood escaping the leftover hole. Joel couldn’t stand the sight of her bleeding.

“Cover her arm,” he ordered once again, “Fast.”

They obeyed and taped a piece of gauze to Ellie’s arm.

“Turn around,” Joel said as Y/n came back to stand beside him.

The nurses, shaking and whimpering in fear for their lives, did as they were told and turned their backs. Y/n kept her gun trained on them while Joel moved to Ellie, cupping the back of her neck and sitting her up. With the reassurance of her shallow breaths against his neck, his worst fear stayed buried twenty years in the past. He lifted Ellie into his arms delicately, his brutality melting to tenderness as soon as he’d touched her.

As Joel carried Ellie out of the room, Y/n stayed on his six and kept her gun aimed. She didn’t spare a glance at the doctor or the operating table as she left, unable to look at even one reminder of what could have been.

Joel and Y/n made it back down the hall, walking with the speed of criminals but the exhaustion of two people who had just laid waste to the world. Y/n tapped the elevator call button rapidly, the true effect of the epinephrine was starting to hit. She stumbled into the car behind Joel, smacking the button for the parking garage and leaned up against the wall. Her heart was slamming against her chest, sweat was pooling at her temples, her body was buzzing.

Joel peered over at her, concerned, and received a passive shake of the head.

“Is she okay?” Y/n whispered in between panting breaths.

“Yeah,” Joel mumbled, staring down at Ellie. The reality of the decision they’d made was beginning to hit them both.

They were dooming the world to save theirs.

The elevator gave them little time to think, dinging as it hit the bottom floor and opening its doors. Y/n stepped out ahead of Joel, her rifle pointed towards any threats lurking in the shadows. Joel spotted a parked and running car, the two of them made a beeline for the vehicle.

“You can’t keep her safe forever.”

Y/n spun around, Marlene stepped out from the darkness with her handgun drawn. Y/n didn’t hesitate to keep her rifle raised.

“No matter how hard you two try,” Marlene took slow, steady steps towards them, “No matter how many people you kill, she’s gonna grow up. And then you’ll die, she’ll leave. Then what? How long till she’s torn apart by Infected or murdered by raiders? Because she lives in a broken world that you could have saved.”

There was truth to what Marlene was saying, neither Joel nor Y/n could deny that.

“Maybe,” Joel answered, “But it isn’t for you to decide.”

“Or you two,” Marlene replied, her eyes flicking to Ellie, “So what would she decide, huh? ‘Cause I think she’d wanna do what’s right.”

Y/n nearly flinched, torn between Ellie’s fierce desire to protect and the plans she had for her future.

“And you know it,” Marlene’s gaze fell on Y/n, seeing the unsureness from her comrade. She slowly lowered her gun, “It’s not too late. Even now, even after what you two’ve done…we can still find a way.”

Y/n and Joel had lost everything to Cordyceps, one way or another. They’d lost their daughter, Y/n had lost her future with Joel and Tommy, her family, Joel had eventually lost Tommy, Tess, Bill and Frank…Cordyceps had taken anything and everything meaningful in their lives. They should have been first in line for advocating for a cure, and they would have been…

But nothing, not even the salvation of the world, was worth losing Ellie.

And that was what made it so easy for Y/n to shoot Marlene in the gut.

As soon as her former friend dropped to the floor, Y/n’s gun fell from her hands and her knees began to wobble. The room was spinning and her heartbeat was ramping up even further. The epinephrine was backfiring.

“No, no, no,” Joel mumbled, spinning around to put his back to Y/n as she fell forward, “Hold onto me.”

Y/n weakly reached around Joel’s neck and looped her arms around him.

Joel strained under the combination of Y/n and Ellie’s body weight, but his determination surpassed his body’s abilities. Carrying one and dragging the other, he fought his way to the truck. He shuffled Ellie in his arms to reach for the door, sliding her carefully into the backseat, before handling Y/n.

“What’s wrong?” Joel asked, twisting his body to take her into his arms, “What’s happening?”

Y/n, beginning to lose her grip on consciousness, shook her head once again and let her head loll against Joel’s shoulder.

“Hang on, hang on, honey,” Joel hurried, growing panicked that her injury had finally gotten to her and torn an organ, “Just hang on for me.”

Joel blindly reached for the passenger side door, he lifted Y/n with a grunt and placed her carefully in the seat. Brushing his hand against her cheek, he wiped the sweat off her skin.

“Rose,” Joel called in a rush as Y/n’s eyes began to flutter shut, slapping her face a few times, “Rose, honey, come on. Stay with me.”

A groan from behind them drew Joel’s attention and got Y/n to open her eyes. The two of them shared a knowing look, Joel swallowing harshly before dragging his fingers down Y/n’s perspiring cheek and unholstering his gun.

Y/n’s gaze followed him as he walked away from her, through the haze of the drugs, she felt some semblance of guilt. Not enough to make her call Joel’s name and ask he show mercy towards Marlene, but some little inkling of guilt that stood the chance at gnawing at her conscience if she ever came back to lucidity.

In the seconds before the bullet released from its chamber, Y/n memorialized her time with the Fireflies. She grieved their attempts to save Boston in the dark of night. The kids they’d lost in the fight, so eager to help, like Riley. All the battles that had seemed like part of something grander that now felt meaningless, now having seen the end goal. If death only bred death, and violence only bred violence, then perhaps there was truth to the old saying…the road to hell was paved with good intentions.

She tried, she thought, as a few tears escaped her eyes, she’d tried so hard to make a difference…

It had just been with the wrong people.

Joel fired one shot

Y/n was freed.

Joel hurried back to the truck and to Y/n’s side, her eyes were now shut and her pulse was slapping against her neck.

“Honey, come on,” Joel said softly, trying to calm both of them down, “I need you to take some deep breaths. Nice and slow.”

“Drive,” Y/n breathed, her heart practically beating out of her chest. Regardless of whether the epinephrine was going to kill her or not, they needed to escape.

Joel hesitated before pressing a kiss to Y/n’s forehead and shutting her door. He ran around the car, slamming its hood down and jumping in the driver’s seat. The keys were still in the ignition, there was nearly a full tank of gas. They were going to make it.

Joel looked over to Y/n, who had gone limp in her seat.

“Rose,” Joel practically shouted, reaching over to feel his love’s wrist, still feeling her pulse working overtime, “Honey, c’mon, wake up.”

“Drive, Joel,” Y/n slurred, her head slumped against her seat.

Joel did as requested and put the truck in drive, maneuvering them through the parking garage. All the while, he kept one trembling hand on Y/n’s knee, her rifle knocking against his knuckles each time they hit a speed bump. He didn’t know if by saving Ellie’s life, he was going to lose Y/n’s, and for once, Joel wanted a win. A full win. He didn’t want to sacrifice one more person.

The garage’s exit lay at the end of a long stretch of tunnel, the glow of daylight approaching faster and faster as Joel drove. Their three month journey would come to a close and his sins would see sunlight. And while anyone else would have said it had all been in vain, to risk one’s life to save humanity only to decide that humanity wasn’t worth the asking price, it wasn’t a waste. Not to Joel.

He glanced in the dashboard mirror, Ellie’s sleeping form in the backseat.

He looked over the glovebox, Y/n’s chest finally beginning to rise and fall at a steadier pace.

He would have done it all over again.

Every.

Single.

Part.

—————————

In a puddle of her own sweat, Y/n came to a few hours later, her head leaned up against the truck window. She blinked a few times, adjusting to the sunlight, and took stock of the rapidly moving landscape. There were forest trees and mountains in the distance.

“Hey,” Joel said, wrapping his hand around Y/n’s thigh.

“Hey,” she mumbled back, looking over to Joel, “Where are we?”

“Just outside of Wyoming,” he answered, rubbing his thumb across her jeans with a deep need to touch her, to assure himself she was okay. “Still a couple hours till we get to Tommy’s.”

Y/n hummed and nodded weakly, trying to look into the backseat at Ellie

“She’s been in and out,” Joel said, keeping his eyes focused on the road, “I told her about the raiders.”

Confusedly scrunching her brows, Y/n glanced back over at Joel.

“Attackin’ the hospital,” Joel continued, his pleading eyes drifting to his partner, “And about the tests they ran on her.”

“Yeah,” Y/n mumbled, reading Joel’s facial cues and coming to some understanding. She needed to be filled in on where she fit into the story.

Joel rubbed his hand over Y/n’s leg, “Get some sleep. I’ll wake ya when we’re close.”

There was so much she wanted to say, but her thoughts were too groggy to string more than two or three words together. With one scan of Joel’s clenched jaw and tired gaze, Y/n could tell he was feeling something similar. There’d be time for talking and setting their story straight, but for now, Y/n could close her eyes once more and settle into the knowledge that they were going home.

—————————

The next day, the car decided it had carried them far enough and the woods of Wyoming was where they’d part ways.

Joel examined the engine, a useless task considering they didn’t have the tools to repair anything, while Ellie and Y/n sat in the car.

“Well, she got us close enough,” Joel announced, coming around to the driver’s side, “We gotta walk the rest of the way. Probably about a five-hour hike,” he hung on the car door in front of Ellie, “But we can manage that. Remember?”

Ellie scanned her memories, bringing up their third day together, in the Massachusetts woods. She smiled, “Yeah.”

“Easy for you to say,” Y/n grunted as she used the backseat door to pull herself out of her seat, “You’re not walking around with two cracked fuckin’ ribs and a headache the size of Texas.”

“What happened to you back there anyway?” Ellie finally asked, Y/n had slept nearly the whole drive thus far. This was the longest she’d stayed awake.

“I did drugs,” Y/n replied honestly, having everything and nothing to hide.

“We’ll take it slow,” Joel promised, looping an arm around Y/n’s waist and kissing her forehead, “Take breaks.”

Y/n chuckled, “There’s a hot shower and a bed waiting on the other side of this fucking mountain,” she pointed up at the first hill they’d have to climb, “If anything, we’re shaving time off this thing.”

Joel smiled at the woman, who was already pulling Ellie to her feet and marching in the direction of their starting point.

As they hiked, Y/n’s energy started to go downhill again, and the painkillers she’d been given at the hospital had completely worn off. She leaned on Joel eventually, letting him brace some of her weight during the steeper portions.

Ellie, while concerned for Y/n’s wellbeing, was even more quiet than before they’d reached the hospital.

“Y’know, Sarah and I used to hike like this all the time,” Joel broke the silence and looked back to Ellie.

Y/n tilted her head towards Joel in surprise. It was the first time he’d brought up his daughter on his own accord…ever.

“I wouldn’t say it was her favorite thing. She wasn’t a fan of the mosquitos and such,” he continued, “But she was a big climber or…scampering. That’s probably the right word.”

“It is,” Y/n interjected, sharing a small smile with Joel.

“That girl…” Joel muttered, “She’d see a big rock and just…” he shot his free hand out, “Pew!”

Even at the mature age of thirteen, Y/n could remember Sarah and her running Texas’ nature trails and climbing the less dangerous rocks. Joel would follow behind, laughing and telling his girlfriend that if she broke his daughter, she was buying him a new one.

“She woulda liked you,” Joel told Ellie, it was one of the most honest things he’d ever said. “Not to say the two of you are the same. Definitely different kids.”

“How so?” Ellie softly asked from behind Joel and Y/n.

“Well, she was a lot more…” Joel trailed off, “I wanna say girly,” he quickly turned to Ellie, “And I’m not sayin’ that you’re not girly.”

“I’m not,” Ellie admitted, barely smiling up at Joel.

“Yeah, you’re not. So that,” Joel chuckled, tightening his hold on Y/n a little as he listed off Sarah’s attributes, “She was taller. She had a killer smile. Again, not sayin’ that you don’t.”

Y/n shook her head, withholding a laugh for the sake of her ribs. Three months prior, they’d all been threatening to kill each other. Now they were dancing around conversational landmines that weren’t even there, so afraid of hurting one another.

“But you know why I think she’d like you?” Joel addressed Ellie once more.

“Why?”

“‘Cause you’re funny,” Joel answered, “I think you would’ve made her laugh.”

Y/n nodded, “She also would have appreciated the well deserved crap you give her dad.”

Joel snorted at Y/n’s comment, knowing there was truth to it. Sarah had always enjoyed having someone to gang up on him with, but no fiercer duo had ever existed than the likes of his daughter and his girlfriend.

“Anyway,” Joel felt his emotions beginning to tighten around his throat, “I bet you would’ve liked her back.”

“Yeah,” Ellie said, still sounding distant, “Bet I would’ve.”

The weight of Sarah’s death had suffocated Joel and Y/n separately for two decades. It had been a blade, sticking out their chest, that they’d somehow learned to live with. But there was something, between their time with Ellie and their coming back together, that had caused the pain to…change. It would never hurt any less than it did now, but Sarah’s memory now seemed like one they could look back on with more than grief. There could be smiles and laughter as they thought back on their beautiful, brilliant girl.

Y/n rested her head on Joel’s shoulder as they walked, he pressed his cheek to her hair. They both felt it.

A little ways more and they’d reached the top of the hill. In the distance, the town of Jackson stretched within its walls. It was far bigger than any of them had realized.

“There ya go,” Joel said as they paused to take it in, “Not much further now.”

He helped Y/n on the decline with her keeping her weary eyes on what they’d now call home. She nearly cried when she realized that they’d never have to leave it again. The three of them could settle into life as close to what it should have been.

“Hey, wait,” Ellie called, bringing Joel and Y/n to a halt. She began to form words before abandoning them, “Fuck…”

Joel’s muscles tightened, worried that she’d taken the time to pick apart his lie.

“Back in Kansas City, you asked me about the first time I killed someone,” Ellie spoke to Joel.

He fidgeted a little as he held Y/n, relieved that it wasn’t about the hospital.

“When I got bit,” Ellie continued, “I-I wasn’t on my own. My best friend was there and she got bit too. We didn’t know what to do, and she says, ‘We can just wait it out…be all poetic and just lose our minds together.’”

Y/n bit her lip, her brief time of knowing Riley’s spirit flashed through her mind.

“And then she did,” Ellie went on with her story, “And I had to…her name was Riley, and she was the first to die. And then it was Tess. And then it was Sam-”

Joel shook his head, “That’s not on you.”

“No,” Y/n reenforced, “Not at all.”

“I know,” Ellie sighed, “But-“

“Look sometimes things don’t work out the way we hope,” Joel said, “You can feel like…like you’ve come to an end…and you don’t know what to do next,” he sighed, thinking back on all the choices in his life that had led him to this moment, “But if you just keep going…you find something new to fight for.”

Y/n looked downwards, feeling every one of Joel’s words ring true in her heart.

“And maybe that’s not what you want to hear-“ Joel tried to continue his speech.

“Swear to me,” Ellie interrupted.

Joel and Y/n paused, holding their breaths as their tale was challenged. Y/n’s exhaustion allowed her to lower her head as she fought to take a deeper breath.

“Swear to me that everything you said about the Fireflies is true,” Ellie continued, her eyes demanding yet still soft.

Lying was an essential part of survival. It was a skill to be honed and a craft that required complete dedication. Joel had lied his way through life, into black market deals and smuggling opportunities. Y/n had lied to aid the Fireflies and to save her own life. They’d been comfortable saying whatever they needed to to stay alive.

That feeling died on the Wyoming hilltop.

“I swear,” Joel replied.

Y/n inhaled as deep as she could, feeling the fullness of what she was about to say wash over her and possess her body.

“I swear.”

Ellie watched them, her mind working to process what they were saying, leaving her nearly unreadable. They waited with bated breath as she decided whether to accept their answers or not.

“Okay.”

Without another word, Ellie picked up her pace, moving past Joel and Y/n to head down the hill. Joel began their descend, but Y/n pulled her arm away from him and stayed frozen.

“Give me a minute,” she said, her eyes on the mountains.

Joel inhaled to argue the point that she couldn’t make it more than ten steps on her own, but the distance in her eyes advised him against it. He let her hand go and began to follow Ellie, turning back once to make sure she was okay.

Y/n let her eyes drift down to Jackson, tracing the outlines of the town and trying to find the house that would become theirs. The possibilities were overwhelming as to what they could do when they got there. If there was electricity, she could cook proper meals for Joel and Ellie. They could have game nights. Tommy could come over at random moments in the day. Ellie could attend a real school. Joel could get back to his roots and fix up the house. They could retire to their bedroom each night, calling out to Ellie to go to sleep before doing the same. It could be the domestic life she’d always wanted, simplistic in every sense.

Except it wouldn’t be real.

Y/n had seen the distrust in Ellie’s face, she knew that at some point, the girl would figure it out. And if she didn’t, she’d always be questioning if her and Joel were telling the God’s honest truth. What their relationship had been would never again be. By saving Ellie’s life, they had forever changed the dysfunctional little found family they’d created.

Y/n blinked once, took a deep breath, and headed down the hill, taking her first step into a life of lies.

——————

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h0nology · 10 months

Text

Pacify Her

Tired blue boy walks my way…

warnings: angst, jealousy, cheating, kissing, neteyam and reader are aged up, smut 18+

Tired, blue boy walks my way. Holding a girl's hand, that basic bitch leaves finally…Now I can take her man

When the courtship was announced it felt like your world shattered into a million pieces. The love of your life, your best friend since childhood was to be mated with another. You couldn’t understand why you were so upset; you knew it would never be you. Despite Neteyam telling you that it would be, and that he’d figure something out. But you knew that it was final, and nothing was to be changed.

That didn’t stop the two of you though. You couldn’t stay away from one another, you never did. Even before, you two had spent every day together since you were kids. Eventually nights too, by the pond. Neteyam either deep inside of you or you two in a deep conversation.

Now it’s only nights or really whenever you two can sneak off to get some privacy, Neteyam is usually busy during the day so you rarely see him, and when you do he’s with his soon to be mate that you couldn’t stand to look at.

Someone told me stay away from things that aren't yours. But was he yours, if he wanted me so bad?

You knew what you’re doing wasn’t right, and it ate you alive. But you can’t help it, after you had gotten use to something and have been doing it for so long, you can’t just stop. It’s like you were addicted to him, you two were addicted to each other.

All of your friends and siblings knew about you two messing around before the courtship, but they figured you two had stopped now that it was announced. But not Lo’ak, he saw you two all those nights—when Neteyam would magically just disappear while everybody was asleep, he knew exactly where his brother was at.

Or during the day, when you’d ask for his whereabouts.

“Lo’ak, have you seen Neteyam?” You asked the boy as you approached him, still looking around.

“He is out hunting.” Lo’ak says, “Look, your dirty little secret is safe with me but all I am saying is you should leave it alone, be with someone who is actually allowed to show you off…like me.”

The thought of you even touching Lo’ak made you cringe, you have always looked at him as your annoying little brother, “Shut up, Lo’ak.”

You sat with him all day, the others soon joining you two. You talked with Kiri, played with Tuk, and tried to ignore Lo’ak as much as you could.

“Oh look, here comes your lover boy.” Lo’ak says, your ears perking up at the words.

“That is not funny, Loak.” Kiri scolded, little did she know her brother was not joking.

“Hey guys.” Neteyam approaches the group out of breath, slinging everything he was carrying onto the table before bending down to pick up Tuk who was waiting to be in his arms.

Neteyam was so good with kids, it made you swoon each time at the sight. Ever since Tuk was born he has been so caring and gentle with her, you had always imagined it being your kids that he held next, but that dream had been crushed.

“May I borrow my best friend?” Neteyam puts Tuk down, looking over you and Kiri as you two crafted something together.

“I guess…” Kiri rolled her eyes, “Hurry back.” She looks at you.

You nodded in response, knowing the little project you two had started may be finished by the time you got back. You got up from your seat, following Neteyam out and into the forest. Once you two were out of anyone’s sight, he grabbed your hand, interlocking his fingers with yours.

“How was your day, my love?” Neteyam asked as you two approached your notorious spot.

“Spent the whole day thinking about you, Nete.” You leaned against a tree, looking up at him as he towered over you.

“Yeah? You missed me?”

“I always do.” You frown.

“I will always be with you, love.” He tilts your chin up, softly kissing your lips, “I love you.”

He attaches his lips back on yours, the pace picking up rather quickly. The both of you knew you couldn’t be gone for long, those days were over, so quickies were your thing unfortunately. His hands start on your hips, then make their way down to cup your soaked, pulsating pussy. You moaned into the kiss, squeezing your legs together at the contact.

“You’re so wet.” He groans, “All for you.” Your voice cracked as his fingers started rubbing against you.

“It better be.” He picks up his pace, “You’re mine, love.” He leaves trails of kisses on your neck, “You want my cock? Is that what you’ve been thinking about all day?”

“Yes, Nete.”

Neteyam unties your loincloth before untying his own, his cock hitting your stomach as it sprung free. Without any thought, you grabbed it, slowly beginning to stroke it causing Neteyam to let out a shaky breath.

“My love…" He moans in your ear, “As much as I love the way your hands make me feel, we do not have time. I need to be in you. Now.”

You pout, looking up at him as you continue to slowly stroke him. He was right, dusk was approaching and you two needed to be back before anyone started to get suspicious. He stared right back at you, sending you a warning with his eyes before they squeezed shut. You felt him twitch in your hand and that’s when you had reluctantly let go of him.

“Jump.”

You immediately did what he said, his hands cuffing you underneath your thighs as he held you up against the tree. The way he picks you up so effortlessly every time really gets to you, watching his muscles flex as he held onto you. Neteyam quickly aligns himself up with you, dropping you down onto him with no warning. His lips attached to yours, swallowing all your loud moans. He thrusts up into you, your nails scratching his back. You knew it would leave marks, but he was yours. So you didn’t care.

“You trying to mark me, love?” Neteyam chuckles, beads of sweat forming on his forehead.

You slightly smile back in response, embarrassed that he had caught onto what you were doing.

“I’m all yours, baby.” He says into your ear, making your walls clench around him at the words, “You like hearing that? That I’m all yours—Fuck, you feel so good.”

“I love you, Nete.” You moan, your orgasm taking over you as he hit that sweet spot over and over again.

“I love you. It will always be you, only you. My beautiful girl, you’ll always be mine.” He rambled into your ear, “You’re the only one I want.” His body jerked against yours, signaling that he was close.

All you wanted was for him to fill you up, fill you with his seed. But that could never happen. Neteyam’s slowed down his motions, coming to a stop before he could shoot his seed up into you. He pulls himself out of you, looking you in your eyes as he began to pump himself in front of you.

“Nete, let me.” You softly say, pecking the corner of his mouth before grabbing ahold of his member again.

You slightly push him back before dropping to your knees, you look up at him as you kitten lick his throbbing cock. If you had more time, you would’ve teased him more, but instead you took all of him in, his tip hitting the back of your throat.

“Oh, just like that.” He looks at you before throwing his head back, “So good, baby.”

It didn’t take long for his warm liquid to shoot into your mouth, trickling down the back of your throat. Neteyam muttered all types of words as you sucked him off one last time before pulling your mouth off of him. You stood up, grabbing your loincloth and putting it back on as Neteyam stood there still trying to get himself together.

“Nete.” You chuckled, throwing his loincloth at him, “Come on, we have to go back.”

He smiles at you, still out of breath as he puts his loincloth on.

“I love you, my sweet girl.” He squeezes your cheeks, placing a kiss on your lips.

“I love you, Nete.”

Pacify her. She's getting on my nerves, you don't love her. Stop lying with those words.

You had gone back before Neteyam, bumping into Kiri as you made your way towards where you were going.

“It is about time.” Kiri rolled her eyes, interlocking her arm with yours, “You took forever.”

“I know, I am sorry. We got caught up in our conversation.”

You and Kiri approached the others where everybody ate, you two took your seat and dug in. Neteyam joined not too long after, taking his seat next to his soon to be mate. You tried to not even look at them, your stomach twisting just at the sight of them together.

“Neteyam how was your day?” You hear her ask, her sweet voice making you cringe, “How are you?”

“Amazing, how was yours?”

You couldn’t help but peek at them, her hand on his arm as his hand was rested on her leg. Neteyam wasn’t a mean person, he wasn’t going to make the girl feel unwanted, you knew that. But you couldn’t help but feel somewhat used. You knew it wasn’t like that, at all, but you couldn’t stop the thoughts running through your mind. They continued their conversation as you continue yours with Kiri.

“I cannot wait for the ceremony, Nete.”

Your ears perked up at the name. Nete. Nobody else has ever called Neteyam that, ever. Only you, since you two were kids that has always been your nickname for him.

“Sorry Kiri.” You cut her off in the middle of her sentence, “I do not feel well, give me a moment.”

You quickly get up from your seat, walking off as far as possible so no one could see the tears forming in your eyes. Eventually you heard Neteyam’s voice calling after you, making you stop in your tracks.

“My love.” He places his hand on your shoulder, turning you around.

“I-” You we’re about to yell but remembered where you were at, “I call you that. I am the only one to call you that. You are my Nete.”

Was he really yours anymore though? Only for a couple minutes during the day and a few hours during the night. But never how it used to be. He’s not yours anymore.

“I know, my love.” He sighs, “I know. I do not know where she got that from.”

“I do not know if I can do this anymore, Nete.” You shook your head, “I cannot be yours, if you are hers.”

“No, I am not hers. I am yours, only yours and you are mine.”

“You are to be mated with her, Neteyam!” You slightly yell, “You are not mine, not anymore…”

“I do not care about the courtship!” He pulls you closer to him so he doesn’t have to yell, “I do not care. You are mine; you will be mine. I will do anything it takes to be with you, my love.”

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