#vincent has ISSUES
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Things End | People Change – Staining Touch
this is shameless friendfiction of my dear friend @whumpcloud's story Things End | People Change, featuring poorest little meow meow vincent, my beloved. go check it out if you haven't already !!!
CW: guilt, so so much self-blame and self-deprication, references to past torture and also past SA undertones (vincent is going through it)
Clary has brought him something new, something to slowly fill out the empty space of the basement that is not his but as close as it gets.
It’s a mirror, almost two-thirds of his height, strange and wobbly and cause of a weird noise Vincent cannot categorize into his existing knowledge when it is bent. Arguably, it is doing a very bad job of being a mirror, besides the fact that it is floppy and almost entertainingly noisy before being put up on the wall, because it distorts his reflection at the edges, pulling him into comical shapes like dough if he moves.
But most importantly, most off-puttingly is the fact that it portrays his reflection at all.
At first, he can do nothing but stare.
In a little under two hundred years, all Vincent has seen of himself was through the eyes of others and those never regarded him too kindly. Not that he didn’t share that sentiment.
He knows what he can see, from the brown of his hair to the shape of his body, he knows what little is left that connects him to Henry, like the green of his eyes, and he knows what separates him, like the scar that sits right under them, as if mocking.
And now that he can see his eyes again, for the first time in what feels like an eternity, for the first time in two human lifespans, which is distinctly one more than he had any right to, he can’t look at what remains of Henry without seeing what remains of Lyfelde.
That man, he…
Vincent swallows. If it could, his undead heart would be beating faster –skipping like a rabbit– with each step that thought takes.
…He loved to leave marks.
Not for some desperate desire to be remembered in an ever-changing world, but instead with the same expectations as couples that carve their initials in the bark of a tree, curious to see the way the tree tries and fails to heal the cuts, to see how they will twist with time.
Vincent is no stranger to cuts, to initials carved into his delicate flesh, to being torn open for amusement and to satiate careless curiosity, even though they will never show on his skin, no matter how he twists and turns to get a good look at himself in the mirror.
Lyfelde however never needed force to leave evidence of himself, even if he can proudly wear the title of the last permanent remainder of Vincent’s weak mortality long gone by, and at his hands no less.
After years and years of captivity, of relentless, giddy torture, Vincent couldn’t point out individual marks of memory, couldn’t remember the incisions, the lacerations, the breaks, only the aftermath, the pain ripping at the edges of his sanity.
But when Vincent closes his eyes, when he imagines his being as he sees himself, there are stains on his chest, in the shape of a freezing claw, long delicate fingers decorated with rings much older than Vincent ever hopes to be.
There is one right over his heart, claiming it rightfully as Lyfelde’s, honouring the hard work he put into tearing him apart just to shape him into a–
Into a toy.
He is collared –like a pet–, marked by two hands wrapping around his throat and squeezing, a brute display of strength Vincent thought could keep him safe.
Even now, after all of these years, his mind produces the image of his hands clearer than the face that is already blurred beyond recognition by time. Neither time nor the Hunters could beat Lyfelde’s touch out of Vincent’s memories.
Vincent stretches, looking over his shoulder, pointedly ignoring the way his ribs protrude through sickly ashen skin. Even the thought that this is a far cry from his jutting ribcage in captivity, the corpselike result of starvation, turns sour with the sacrifice of those that feed him.
He is tainted, he knows, from comfort twisted to form a blade –a stake– and embraces that should have been kind and understanding, that Vincent now can’t even bring himself to call “warm”.
He wonders –briefly– if, behind his back, in the security of Vincent’s blindness, Lyfelde’s expressions would have betrayed his intentions. If there was a way a trick of light and precognition could have warned him, if he had just seen it, seen the signs that should have been so glaringly obvious.
Still, at the cost of himself, he had found comfort and solace in the deathly cold touch, and that should have been warning enough.
Almost obsessively, his gaze scans over his own marred, unmarred skin, even as it is stretched and squished by the metal-mirror, now that he finally has the chance to, after decades of nothing. Some quiet, drowned-out part of him whispers back that this is why he avoided anything similar for so long, that the evasion of his own reflection was not only by force of his vampirism but by some self-preserving instinct.
It’s excruciating in a way that is dangerously addicting, a sizzling fire that he cannot look away from. Pain for the sake of pain for the sake of entertainment.
Curiosity and her twin sister punishment.
If he dares to let his eyes drop lower, his hips will carry two hand-shaped brands of intimacy and trust that were only ever one-sided, burned into his skin deeper than any silver and scratch marks betraying the attempts to rid himself of the ever-present poison seeping from every pore.
They condemned him to be both poisoned and poison at the same time, always a victim and always a monster and always rightfully so.
Vincent swipes the mirror from the wall, heaving, watching it fall to the ground, deafening but too slow. He wants to fall to his knees, begging and ripping the metal to shreds, ripping his own reflection to shreds so that he will never have to look at it again.
… So that it will never be looked at again.
#today i bring you: insanity. tomorrow? who knows#we were being so so insane about him#and then polly said something that made me go into an hour-long spiral#with this as the end result#vincent has ISSUES#and i love him dearly for it <3#also in case it wasnt already clear:#this is a love letter to basically everything polly has ever written <3#seriously go read their stuff!!#things end | people change#vampire whumpee#vampire whump#self deprecation#victim blaming#self blame#past torture references#sa undertones#emotional whump#self image issues#intimate whumper#vampire whumper#grief#other people's ocs#honey's writing
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starting a former william fan support group bc what the entire fuck was that
#redacted audio#redacted asmr#redactedverse#art#illustration#redacted vincent#vincent solaire#look william is right in that thats how it be sometimes way#does NOT make his actions any less shitty and certainly doesnt absolve him#suggesting vincent and sam just fuck off seems incredibly dismissive and sort of is but he's right#william knows he isnt going to change and vincent (+ sam but he's really only got a tiny stake in this) can deal with it or bugger off#super interesting issue because i can clearly see both sides of the argument#william cant afford to not be strategic and that includes manipulating the people he has power over#THAT SAID#vincent is rightfully upset at being fucked with for william's interests#i dont think theres a solution for everyone here#stay and become involved at worst or complicit at best#or cut ties completely#which is a whole nother can of worms and leaves vincent (+ sam but hold your horses) vulnerable to being killed by either a clan or drifter#(which would be hard but not impossible) or get snapped up by someone looking to manipulate him#sound familiar?#and sam was also there#someone needs to explain to him how a monarchy works#like yes honey william DOES get to make every decision on his own and move assets and people as he sees fit without counsel#thats what it says on the tin
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Koco's official suitor tier list (until galileo and francis eng routes arrive)
Tier 1: THE suitors. I love them a bit too much and I wanna just rhhajgdhsghadgdsgRAHHHH you know what I mean. Theodorus was kinda a jumpscare in there, though. I was expecting to hate his route but I was smitten
Tier 2:
Arthur has a bit of bias since he was my first route but... you know.
William Dazai and Mozart are all in the same level of "oh way i didnt mind those routes too much." I also was obsessed with William when I first saw him.... he actually got me into the game....
Still going through Vlad's but it's so melodramatic it's fun. Also he's just a silly little guy.
Tier 3: With all of them it's the same story: I like them better when I'm not dating them... Like, it makes me wish for friendship routes almost haha.
Tier 4:
I love Vincent. One of my favorites. I love him in game. He was actually a huge inspo for me when I was young, too. He's my angel baby boy I love him I'd let him cook me anything. That being said... I'm not sure how happy I am about Vincent's mental illnesses in game being so underplayed. Like.... him cutting his ear off is one of the biggest things people know about him irl... and it's not even mentioned? Not even Gaugin is blamed for it?? Personally I have so many hcs about Vincent that he's almost a whole new character. Doesn't mean I don't enjoy ingame Vincent I love him but yk... I don't mind the others either....
Everything I said about Vincent, put that on Jean and double it (even the part about young me looking up to them). I'm sorry but CHANGING THE GENDER OF JOAN OF ARC??? doesnt,, doesnt that defeat the whole.... urggh yeah that one irked me for a while. HOWEVER. If you're big brain like me and hc Jean as transmasc then Jean becomes the best pookie bear in the world. He's so autistic coded (I'm autistic so I may just be projecting) and I love him so much. He's also a silly pookiebear.
So um yeah that's my thoughts on them hehe. If anyone agrees or disagrees lemme know I wanna become more talkative and active on ikevamp tumblr haha
#ikemen vampire#ikevamp#cybird ikemen#ikemen series#i maybe went a bit off on vincent and jean#honestly if it weren't for the historical inaccuracies#they'd be up in tier 1#the history nerd (sebas) in me is just too strong#smh#yes i have personal bias#and comtes high placement has nothing to do with daddy issues#if you think that ur crazy#bc i said so
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le père céleste m'aime-t-il ?
#(ooc: yeah so he has complex catholic issues now)#(ooc: she’s high and on the verge of an emotional breakdown btw)#rp account#john wick rp account#marquis vincent de gramont#john wick rp acc#marquis de gramont rp#high table rp
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omg i wanna know more about vince's arasaka ex-boyfriend! he looks cute! hope he's not a dick. but then again you gotta be a certain level of dick to survive in arasaka so maybe im setting myself up. do the other co-workers know or was it a hush-hush thing?
AAHHH!!! öashdfafd thanks so much for asking!!! BETTER BUCKLE UP, this is gonna be long and angsty xDD
(putting his not-100%-polished or canon appearance here again cause I like having pics with my long posts XD)
Okay so... his name is Shou, like Vince he is half-Japanese, but he actually grew up and spent the majority of his life in Japan. He comes from a similar background as Vince, too, corpo-family with ties to Arasaka, excellent education, good grades, a little bit of an outsider even, but he never intermittently left the corpo world like Vince did. He got his entry-level position job at Arasaka fresh out of university and has been (outwardly) loyal and obedient ever since, rising in ranks in no time.
He's roughly 10 years older than Vince, and in 2074 gets transferred to Night City from Tokyo, to help with the expansion of the Counterintel department there. Technically he's on Jenkins' level, experience- and skill-wise, but since everything works a bit differently in Night City, for the time being he ends up a part of Jenkins' team on a level with Vince. It would've been Jenkins' duty to show Shou the ropes actually, but he delegates the task to good old Agent V instead, and that's how they first properly get to know and work with each other.
Let's just say, there is definitely an instant curiosity/interest and base-level of attraction from both sides XD Vince and Shou work well together, share a lot of common interests, have similar ambitious personalities, (both of them are a little bit of a dick, really), and inevitably they also spend a lot of time together. The one thing that Vince is most interested in though, that Shou always seems to avoid answering directly, is why he volunteered to come to Night City from Tokyo. Most people V knows that are striving to rise to the top would wish for it to be the other way around. Shou is always like "I wanted a change of scenery", "I wanted to broaden my horizon", "It looks good on my resume to be in the teamlead of this project" and so on, but none of that feels 100% genuine and so Vince keeps his walls up and tries to maintain a professional distance, despite really liking him otherwise. Emphasis on "tries", cause Shou is not making it easy for him either xD
Some time passes, Vince is still adamant about not wanting a relationship with a coworker (also because he is low-key worried if he lets someone into his life too closely, they might discover he's in contact with Jackie and leaking very classified company secrets to him now and then). But still, one evening Shou and him end up alone at a bar together and one thing leads to another...
Initially their relationship was definitely more on the hush-hush side, not because they were ashamed of it or anything, but because Vince didn't want to be blamed with treating Shou favorably over the others in his team because he was sleeping with him. As time went on though the others definitely caught on, and there was a little bit of drama and bad blood, but nothing they didn't know how to deal with. They had to make it official towards Jenkins and the head of the department at the time soon-ish after becoming a thing anyway though, to not run into problems on that side either, but it went surprisingly smooth. Vince actually was very very happy at the time and wouldn't have figured to ever find someone he'd click so well with that he started to imagine a long-lasting future together.
Long story short though... It never came to that. I mentioned in the lore post that their relationship ended abruptly and bitter, and yeah. Let's just say, Shou hadn't come to Night City for a change of scenery, but as part of an elaborate plan he'd been setting up for years to get out of Arasaka for good, make a bunch of money in the process, and disappear from the face of the earth. Fuck off to somewhere where they'd never be able to track him down, the Soviet Union or something like that. He hadn't planned on genuinely falling in love with Vince though.
Aware that Vince was (apparently) very loyal to Arasaka, he also knew it would need some effort to convince him to come along with him, leave everything behind for good and start over somewhere new. So, what's his idea here? Make it seem like Vince is leaking info to a competing corp by messing with his computer and files. He abused Vince's trust to basically force him to come with him, cause at the press of a button he'd be able to notify Jenkins of Vince’s “betrayal” and he would have no other choice but to run away. Vince figures this out accidentally, and just briefly before Shou can set him up in a way so that there would’ve been no turning back. Since Vince is *actually* leaking company info, just not to a corp but his best friend whose safety he’s now also extremely scared for, he kind of has to make a choice between “run away with the love of my life” and “run to Jenkins and tell him about the setup before Shou can go through with his plan”. And he ends up choosing Jenkins out of loyalty to Jackie.
Let’s just say… the ensuing chaos did not end well for neither Shou nor Vince, but at least Vince walks out of it somewhat alive. Shou never felt in the wrong btw (and really, he was not wrong to want to get himself and Vince out of Arasaka asap). He did what he did out of love, genuinely convinced it was the only thing and the right thing he could've done. Best, most loving intentions, worst possible execution.
(one day, when I have Vince in NPV format, be ready for gut-wrenching VP of all of this. I'M NOT OKAY ABOUT THEM. Also, imagine the very awkward convo with Kerry later on that starts with "So, I told you everything about Louise... now how did your last relationship end?")
#cyberpunk 2077#corpo v#vincent ezaki#shou#shou doesn't have a last name yet but he will one day I promise XDD he'll get his own tag#agent v and agent shou - instant solidarity through one-syllable names xD#and he ends up one of the main reasons why Vince has such massive trust issues with others and letting people close#answered asks#swearingcactus#seriously thanks so much for asking and enabling me to ramble about the tragic blorbos#long post
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you know a dynamic i really love? deer coded man and his wolf coded boyfriend
#mit.txt#when i say deer coded i mean man who has issues(tm) but looks innocent#i guess this is max/vincent posting on main#also vw bit im not tagging it because this is the movie main blog
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Someone Like Me by St Vincent except it’s a Lukethan in which Ethan is baffled that Luke would chose him when he holds the affection of so many other better [according to Ethan] people
#st Vincent#and#Lukethan#a fusion you NEVER saw coming#Ethan has self-esteem issues#his [headcanon] relationship with his dad and his [canon;headcanon] relationship with his mum don’t help#but yeah
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Oh...
Andy Barclay x reader "maria"
Scenario: Andy died and Maria had just come home from work and she saw his dead body.
Another day...another work day having to stay at work for 4 more hours which means, less andy. Honestly, I don't know what I'd do without him. I just miss him so much I had to sneak on my phone and text him.
M: baaabbeee, can we have a cuddle date? x
A: only if there can be kisses too. x
M: of course x
A: how long until you're out of work? x
M: just over half an hour ); x
A: awh, I miss you x
M: I miss you too x
A: can we also watch a movie? Maybe The Banana Splits Movie? You alllwaays talk about it and I've never seen it so, can we? x
M: yes x
A: good. I miss you so much. x
M: I miss you too. x
A: I love you. x
M: I love you too. See you soon, my boss is gonna kill me if he sees that I'm not working but I love you more then anything and anyone. Bye 🥺🥰🥺🥰 x
He didn't reply after that text. Why? He literally has mommy issues for me.
Timeskip
I had just gotten home from work and a uber was leaving the street when everybody around here has a car. Why?
The bedroom light was on so he must've been awake and waiting for me in bed. I just can't wait to be able to cuddle him again.
I grab my backpack from the back seats and lock my car and then go inside and drop my bag next to his in the porch and he'd usually be like "babe? Hello?" Or just come downstairs and hold me hostage with cuddles and kisses all night, but tonight felt different.
I walk up the stairs and the bedroom door was open and I couldn't hear his breathing or a movement or even a word from him except for my footsteps echoing throughout the house.
I walked inside and my heart shattered.
His wrists were tied up to the headboard and his throat has been gutted. His head was facing left and his legs were too. His fingers were still and the right side of his neck was stabbed.
"Andy?..." I ask, no response.
Then I remembered, it's that time of year again.
I can't belive this could happen to him.
I broke down on the floor and kneeled next to him with tears streaming down my face and I felt like this was it. He didn't deserve this.
I layed next to him and cried into his chest and mumbled all sorts of things and even this didn't make me feel better.
Not after he had just proposed to me last night.
#chucky#andy barclay#andy barclay x reader#chucky series#chucky season 3#chucky 2023#alex vincent#im in love with andy barclay#if he dies next week im going with him#WHY DID DON HAVE TO DO THIS TO ANDY MY SWEETHEART 😭😭#chucky can go to hell now#chucky season three#andy barclay has mommy issues#i listened to burn from hamilton whilst writing this
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What did Naru want do/be when she grew up? What aspirations did she dream of as a child?
(I suppose you mean Nara? It's ok tho, we all make typos!)
As a very young child, while still living in Gridania, Nara wanted to be a songstress.
Her adoptive father, Vincent, was some sort of mix between an actor, singer and dancer. He thought that it would be a good idea to teach some of this abilities to his daughters. And while Tahla rejected this completely, Nara became enamoured by music.
She became quite a talented songstress, although she never thought that could be her calling. Nara saw the life her father led as an entertainer and she was not particularly on board with the idea. Plus, Vincent himself became quite jealous of how good she was. He worked really hard to crush her dreams about becoming an actual songstress one day.
#vincent was a terrible father figure#nara has hardcore daddy issues because of him tbh#thanks for asking!#ffxiv#ffxiv oc#my oc#tumblr ask
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Vincent and Leo explicitly bond over being the same, that is people with extreme self-hatred who blame themselves for the misfortune of their most important person and think they should die. Despite entering Leo's service on the condition that Leo would grant him the wish of erasing his existence, Vincen't loyalty to him is genuine. He completely devotes himself to Leo, he stays alive because Leo ordered him to, he goes against Oswald when it should be all the same to him because Leo is his master. This is despite Vincent explicitly claiming to hate the Nightray Duke for reminding him of himself in his ruthlessness, hell, he even hates Break because he's also like him.
When Elliot dies, Leo is left with nothing but Vincent and reveals everything to him. Vincent is honest for once in his life and does the same. Even if their relationship is nothing but mutual wound-licking, it's truthful. They are someone each othe can cling onto when they don't have anything else. They hate themselves, but they understand each other, they can't help but care for each other, so they can't help but care for themselves. It was words meant for Vincent that reached Leo.
Vincent pushed Leo to take on his role as Glen and Leo ultimately rewarded him with a purpose, where the very thing that brought misfortune on Vincent would save yet another lonely existence.
#ada tells vincent to giver his life to her if he doesn't care about it#and her words reached him but ultimately he is not like her and he doesn't think he deserves to be with her#he can give his life to leo#and have someone do something with it#vincent is someone leo can rely on when it feels like he has been subject to the cruel whims of fate his whole live#i sure love broken people that deal with their issues with power dynamics#i'm still here being a vinleo truther in the year 2023
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Wh- what's happening to me?!
I-im not a lesbian but... I wont her
#i havnt even met her ingame#i solidly believe she is a lesbian lmao#from reading the personality section of her wiki girl has so many issues oh my god we are touching hands gently separated by a pain of glass#ace attorney#Vincent speaks#demyx posts
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one thing im doing is making akira have bpd and be an alcoholic
#age old question of ;was it he way the character is written that made me latch on or did i make them that way afterwards' etc etc#he already is pretty hypersexual. def has anger issues too.#his anger issues are much lower key than vinces though :/ much more deep bubbles than vincents.#lesslikely to act on them though cuz he knows how to keep a handle. also doesnt have the werewolf rage to make them worse#i imagine his drinking and carelessness worries sano tho
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why cant carlos be real
#vincent put him on my dash and im just. man#3make has its issues but carlos' design is NOT one of them!!!!!!#under the umbrella // ooc
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🖊Luca :)
O my lord HE! Literally the first oc I ever remember making my little man <3 he used to be cis which was v v cringe of him his story now doesn’t even exist if he’s not trans
Let’s see fun facts hmmmmmm
He isn’t even five feet tall what a short king
Loves to cook and make sure his people are eating well. The kind of guy who would wake up every 2 hours to make sure his brisket cooks ok over night
Left the cult he was raised in and immediately decided to become goth. Pierced his own ears,shaved his head, started listening to goth music
Owns an apron that says no bitchin in my kitchen and he loooves wearing it whenever he cooks
Would literally cry real tears if you showed him the MONTERO (call me by your name) music video.
If I could draw him I would put him here for all to see but instead a poem thank you Anne Carson for writing about my fella
#these are only the fun ones he is so traumatized mr mental illness I love you#songs for him also:#cruel -saint Vincent#hello my old heart -the oh hellos#teen idle -marina#owie what an issues#also he loves sharks they are his favorite animal he still has his child hood shark stuffed animal#as you can see in my lovely pinned post#I love one (1) recovering Christian
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soooooo i cannot coherently come up with a specific question rn but i do want to know more about all your characters so my question is this: what's something about each character (do as many as you want) that hasn't come up in the story yet but is an important part of who they are? really any fun facts would make my day
Okay so I was sobbing for a bit becayse of this, now to answer! A keystone of each if the main 5 characters are as follows and in their own words (think of it as their internal dialog);
Remus: "They don't want to hurt me, they don't want to hurt me, they don't want to hurt me..."
Sabrina: "I cannot be weak like she was, I have to be there for them no matter what"
Sylva: "They showed you what love was. That is greater then anything from who I was"
Vincent: "I'm done fighting"
Kathy: "Walruses are fucking awesome becayse of how communal they are and we should try and be like that. And they have big murder tusks"
#my original characters#my own#my own work#my stuff#son of witches#wlwoc#remus raven#sabrina raven#sylvaria#kathy raven#vincent crowe#remus has abandonment issues#kathy and sabrina despise their deadbeat mom#sylvaria was dredged out of a demon pit#vincent spent too much of his life fighting#asks#I ACTUALLY GOT AN ASK#ugly crying
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I'm getting real sick of YouTube movie reviewers talking about how 2d animation is dead and only Japan cares about 2d films. While there is a truth to it, please stop relying on disney/pixar for your 2d fix and please look else where. You'd be amazed how many 2d films have come out recently (and still to come) that aren't from either Japan or Disney.
#this isn't just movies either but this has been a specific issue for movies#and I think to films like loving vincent that where groundbreaking#for being a feature length oil painting animated film and that came out in 2017#and it didn't make a ton of money at the box office but it did get above even#please just support indie companies
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