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sepia-mahogany · 3 years

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Prompt: hearing about xuanwus defeat, madam jin and jin zixuan come to lotus pier and overhear madam yu saying wei wuxian should have let the 'sect heirs die', lwj who's recovering also overhears, the 3 get first hand experience of jiang household situation and decide fk this and take wwx out of there, its a prompt from vrishchikawrites blog (a wonderful write!) So maybe ask permission?

From the prompt on @vrishchikawrites

Jin Zixuan could not forget the young man, the head disciple of Yunmeng Jiang, who, despite his previous (petty) grievances with, had stepped up when everyone else had been frozen on the spot, and no matter how hard he tried, he could not get his blood stained image out of his mind. Which had led to this discussion.

“What? No! I forbid it.” his father responded when he asked for sending reinforcements to Jiang Sect, while he understood with Cloud Recesses burnt down, and Nie under attack, either Yunmeng Jiang or Lanling Jin were next on the table, and despite having well equipped men, with the best of weapons, his father refused to extend help.

Refused to stand against those who sought to harm his son, ‘in situations like these, know when to step back’ he had said, and Jin Zixuan could feel shame creeping up under his skin, outnumbered and clearly at losing stakes, he hadn’t hesitated to save him, and what would that make him if he forgot the debt so clearly owed? To live the lavish life of a coward..! He could see his mother fuming from where she stood, and closed his eyes to suppress his bitter thoughts, he wanted to do something, anything to help.

And suddenly, anger melted from her face and that smile crept up her face and he felt a chill down his spine, a sense of foreboding overcame him, he could see his father tense as well. “Of course, the Jin Sect sides with them.” she spoke, venom dripping off her every word. “Nothing wrong if the Sect Leader’s wife wants the marriage renewed?” a pit formed in his stomach, he did not want to marry a woman he barely knew, but using this opportunity, they could, in a sense create a bond, stronger than of just two sworn sisters.

However, “Madam Jin meets up with her sworn sister, Madam of Jiang Sect, just as Qishan Wen begins its attacks?” the war has been declared, how would it seem if the two sect Madams, and the Sect heirs are meeting, with or without the Sect Leader? “The risks are completely unneeded, what do we gain from this?” his mother glared at his father, who pointedly ignored her, Jin Zixuan exhaled, thinking things over.

As much as he disliked the engagement, he knew she would not bring it up, unless the situation, as dire as it was, needed it, this bond could provide future aid to one another should the need arise, so Jin Zixuan kept his disagreements to himself, because he knew she wouldn’t force him, not with the concerns of a cold loveless marriage like his parents, he knew she was using it as a cover to aid her sworn sister.

An opportunity, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath, then remembered how the Second Jade, Lan Wangji had stood shoulder to shoulder with him, and Wei Wuxian, Head Disciple, had stepped up to save them.

Jin Zixuan exhaled, and made a decision, muttering out a half-hearted excuse, he left them on their own, and later into the night, he approached his mother.

--------

The boat landed steadily, unnoticed in the middle of the night, his mother had won the final say in the matter, of course with the reluctant agreement of remaining disguised as just another trade ship, the serene view would have been calming, had his nerves not have been high strung from adrenaline, small sacrifices, he could of course find a way to break off the engagement in a future of more peaceful times.

Jin Zixuan climbed out the boat first, followed calmly by his mother, the disguises were near perfect, for the disciples around the brightly lit place to look curious, but not alarmed. One, he recognised seeing a few times at Cloud Recesses, came near them with a nervous smile. “We offer you our sincerest apologies but...we’d appreciate it if travellers could avoid an audience with the Sect Leader?”

The disguises were perfect then, for they had been mistaken as travellers that would go to and fro from Yunmeng Jiang Sect, his mother sniffed and looked at the disciple sternly “We are not here for the Sect Leader, but the Violet Spider, we have an important message for them.” Jin Zixuan had noticed before but now it had become more apparent as the disciples shifted around, something was off, it dampened his enthusiasm and the rush he had felt earlier, instead concern filled him, had something happened to Wei Wuxian?

His mother held out a token, the disciple’s eyes widened and he bowed in respect, “I assume this would be enough?” Madam Jin said curtly, and the disciple nodded, though tensely. “This one will escort you to the guest chambers”

The curious gazes had not been moved, as they moved inside, step by step, down the corridor they went, as the muffled voices became more distinguishable, all 3 of them froze when they heard, unmistakably the Jiang Sect Heir’s voice. “-You shouldn’t have played the hero and you shouldn’t have cared for such a hell of a thing. If in the beginning you hadn’t….”

Jin Zixuan felt a cold pit forming in his stomach, surely he must be mistaken, but seeing the expression twisting on his mothers face, he could assume he was not, in fact, misunderstanding what Jiang Wanyin was implying.

The disciple bowed quickly, slightly panicked “If you’d follow me-” Madam Jin pointed at him and he immediately shut up, head bowed, just as the Jiang Sect Leader reprimanded “Jiang Cheng.” Silence followed. “Do you know in which ways what you just have said is not appropriate?” was followed by a glum “Yes.”

Even if slightly, Jin Zixuan relaxed, his mother’s expression lightening into a frown, ‘at least someone is self-aware’ Madam Jin thought. “He’s just angry and speaking without care” another voice added, Jin Zixuan perked up, Wei Wuxian! So he was alright, he felt relieved. Madam Jin continued to frown, Wei Wuxian was clearly trying to lessen the pressure off of the Jiang heir.

Another harsh voice cut through them all “Yes, he doesn’t understand but what does it matter, as long as Wei Ying understands!?” rang out her voice, Madam Jin’s lips pursed into a line, of what her son had just said, that was what she was focusing on?

“‘To attempt at the impossible’ is exactly how he is, isn’t it? Fooling around even though he knew it’d bring trouble to his sect!?” Jin Zixuan sneaked a look at his mother to see her eyes cold, her fist clenched tightly, he was aware they shouldn’t be hearing this, but this? It wasn’t what they expected at all, he was frozen in place, what in the world was he hearing?

Madam Jin’s thoughts matched her appearance, for once she felt less than charitable towards Yu Ziyuan, and more and more like a fool, here she was, risking her and her son’s safety, her sects safety, for a woman who couldn't care less about her son’s life, but was also wilfully blinding herself to the war right on the horizon, ‘No’ she thought to herself, ‘it was I who was truly blind’

And it was the boy she heard being called ‘Fengmian’s bastard’ or ‘son of a servant’ who had saved her son's life instead, she bit back the bitter chuckle that threatened to escape her, truly, what a fool she was, to be caught in the violet spiders web.

She looked at her son, whose face clouded over the more he heard, she grabbed his arm tightly, if nothing else then to prevent him from barging inside, with Jiang Fengmian’s favor, she was sure that they didn’t need to interfere, until, “My lady, what are you doing here?” she held back her disbelief, her son on the other hand, inhaled sharply.

This was what he was focusing on? Not the insults to his bas- to his ward? To his sect’s entire foundation? It would seem she was truly mistaken, in her and Yu Ziyuan sharing their miseries, entirely wrong about her character, and who was still throwing around callous words for the sake of it, for what else? If not her own cruelty?

"What am I doing here? What a joke that I am asked of such a thing! Sect Leader Jiang, do you still remember that I'm also the leader of Lotus Pier? Do you still remember that every inch of the earth here is my territory? Do you still remember, between the one lying there and the one standing there, which one is your son?" Disbelief and disgust couldn’t even begin to describe what Madam Jin was feeling, the Sect Leader’s response, however, “I do remember.” Enhanced those to the heights she didn't even know she was capable of feeling.

And so stood the enraged Madam of Jin Sect, the horrified Jin heir and one ashamed disciple whose head could bow no lower, but that was nothing compared to what was said next “You do remember, but there's no use if you simply remember. Wei Ying, he really can't take it unless he stirs up some trouble, can he? If I had known, I would've made him stay in Lotus Pier properly and not go outside. Could Wen Chao really have dared to do anything to the two young masters of the GusuLan Sect and Lanling Jin Sect? Even if he did, it'd mean that they ran out of luck. Since when was it your turn to play the hero?"

Blood roared in Madam Jin’s ears, her nails digging into her palm, she wanted to bite Yu Ziyuan’s head off there and then. ‘Of all the idiotic, foolish, horrid, things she could utter-’ in her cursing, she only realised she had put too much force in her rage filled haze when her son hissed in pain, she immediately let go of his arm, and pinched the bridge of her nose, taking calming breaths.

She was afraid she would do something terrible and irrevocable if she stayed there any longer, listening to a pathetic mockery of- she exhaled and pushed Jin Zixuan towards the open doors. “B-but mother-” he looked back but she gave him that look and he quietened “Later a-Xuan.” while moving outwards, the disciple trailing behind them, they could easily catch some of the words the woman threw at Wei Wuxian.

Madam Jin gritted her teeth in anger, and left without looking back, once she and her son were seated in the boat. “A-Xuan” she began, lightly ruffling his hair “Your marriage is up to you to decide, I will have no say in the matter from here onwards” Her son was not going to be married into that cursed Sect no matter what if she could help it, she moved forward to pull him into a hug, “Mother was wrong.”

“But mother what about..?” She heard him say, she pulled back and rest one hand on his shoulder, the other caressing his cheek, her son, who by the Jiang’s standards, should’ve been killed, and her blood boiled in her veins. “We came here to make a bond and talk if it were possible, since that wasn’t possible, it can be done some other day.” She lightly patted him, and seeing his thoughts drift off, thought to herself darkly ‘and if the Jiangs are attacked, well, they ran out of luck then.’

Her son hesitantly nodded, “Wei Wuxian...I owe him, for saving me then, if not for him.....” She sniffed, as if indicating what was obvious “Of course,” When the news spread later that Lotus Pier was attacked, with Jiang Wanyin and Wei Wuxian on the run, she hoped for Wei Wuxian’s survival, more so than the Jiang Sect Heir.

And if, perhaps, after a few years her son proposed sworn brotherhood with that Wei Wuxian, well, it wasn’t without her approval.

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authors notes i guess?

Okay so writing Madam Yu’s lines legit left me disgusted like wtf was she even saying?? Also like I tried to write Madam Jin similar but a bit less than Madam Yu (ya know madam jin never whipped kids with her spiritual weapons, if she had any, not to our knowledge at least...right?) but ended up venturing straight into slightly dark madam jin heh, also like no engagement, no jin-wei tense relationship, (there’ll be 1-2 parts more probably) also wwx woke up earlier in this one, this’ll serve as catalyst for later years.

#mdzs fic #jin zixuan #madam jin #jin guangshan #jiang wanyin #jiang fengmian #madam yu #unnamed disciple lol #prompt writing #anon asks #my writing

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gusu-emilu · 3 years

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(hi nonny, it took me a while to write this ask meme request but here it is! chengning + #15: first meeting. i hope you see this lol)

Follow Your Arrow: Jiang Cheng / Wen Ning

(Cloud Recesses Era, G, 1.5k, No Warnings Apply, read on AO3)

Jiang Cheng and Wen Ning accidentally go to the same spot in the Cloud Recesses to practice archery.

* * *

Wen Ning strings his bow and aims at the waterfall, where a chunk of rock is falling down the cascade, bouncing in and out of the foamy rush of water.

He straightens up. Pulls back a bit more. Lifts his fingers—

An arrow that is not Wen Ning’s zips across the stream. Wen Ning jerks out of posture, and his own arrow goes straight into the ground. The rock he would’ve been aiming at plops in the water with a giant splash, untouched by Wen Ning and...whoever that other arrow came from.

He turns to see a boy standing a few paces down the water’s bank. He wears a scowl that darkens the white robes marking him as a guest disciple of the Cloud Recesses. A single side bang hangs over his defined cheekbones and just reaches his chin. He bears his weight a bit unevenly, as if his leg is injured.

Jiang Cheng, the clan heir whose knee was slashed by the water ghouls at Caiyi Town yesterday. Wen Qing had hopped into his boat to treat his injury. It's one of the last things Wen Ning can remember from yesterday, before the ghouls seized him and his mind went blank.

Although he's familiar with Wei Wuxian already, Wen Ning hasn't talked to Jiang Cheng yet.

Wen Qing has warned him not to talk to disciples from the other clans. But it’s been so lonely for Wen Ning here, waiting around in the corners of the Cloud Recesses, isolated for being too young to attend classes. He can't even see the other disciples, never mind talk to them. Although he doesn't mind quiet time by himself, he’s been itching to fill the space left by Wen Qing’s frequent disappearances. He's used to always having his sister by his side, and now she keeps slipping away to search for some unnamed item.

Wei Wuxian’s bright laugh, gentle nudges, and sheer determination to include Wen Ning has filled some of that empty space. But by scratching the itch for company, the longing has only grown more persistent.

From what Wen Ning has seen, Jiang Cheng isn’t nearly as friendly as Wei Wuxian, preferring to smack away an outstretched hand whereas Wei Wuxian would grab it and tug its owner away on an adventure.

But a shared interest in archery has already helped Wen Ning grow close to Wei Wuxian. Maybe it could work with his shidi too.

Hopeful for a new friend, Wen Ning smiles meekly and waves at Jiang Cheng. He snaps his hand down right away, because Jiang Cheng’s only response is to narrow his eyes sourly, square his shoulders, and string his bow again to aim at the waterfall.

Oh. He's definitely not here to make friends.

Wen Ning turns back to the waterfall, the bow sulking as he strings it. Another rock falls down the cascade, but he can’t focus on it or steady his hands. Not now, with someone right next to him, shooting at the same target and likely shooting him angry glares, too.

Another arrow whirs past Wen Ning. It misses the falling rock.

Wen Ning looks out of corner of his eyes at Jiang Cheng, who huffs and grumbles to himself, pulling a third arrow out of the quiver.

“J-Jiang-gongzi?”

Jiang Cheng draws the bow tighter, its taut string matching the tension in his face. “What?”

“Am I...in your way?” Wen Ning thinks he was here first, but he wouldn’t be surprised if he hadn’t noticed another person practicing nearby.

Jiang Cheng’s expression softens a bit, but his voice does not. “You will be if you keep trying so hard to let me know you’re here.” He strings his bow with brusque motions—pompous, even. Doing exactly what he told Wen Ning not to—making a show of his archery practice to ensure Wen Ning notices his presence.

He shoots and misses, again. Scowls and huffs, again. This time, his eyes meet Wen Ning’s for a moment, then dart away as if Wen Ning said his shot was bad, despite the fact that Wen Ning barely had time to react to the shot, and even if he did, he’d never insult someone’s archery skills.

A faint flush spreads across Jiang Cheng’s cheeks as he prepares to release another arrow. This one also looks like it's lined up to miss, due to his uneven posture from his injured leg.

“Jiang-gongzi?”

Jiang Cheng whips around to face Wen Ning. His sharp glare is like an arrow of its own, and it does not miss.

Well, this is intimidating.

Wen Ning hesitates, then steels himself and hurries over to Jiang Cheng. “Jiang-gongzi…”

Up close, he’s even more intimidating. Not because of his angular jaw or arrogant frown, but because of a bashful glimmer in his eyes that is very out of place with the rest of his behavior, and Wen Ning is not sure how he feels about that.

“What do you want?” Jiang Cheng says.

Wen Ning looks down at the ground to keep himself from trying to decipher Jiang Cheng's expression, unsure of what lies behind the irritation Jiang Cheng voices so openly. “I…I’m not that great at archery, but...I can help you.”

“With what?” Jiang Cheng's scowl deepens. “I don’t need help.”

“Your leg is injured.” Wen Ning’s words are slow and hesitant. He gestures down at Jiang Cheng’s knee. “It’s affecting your stance.”

Jiang Cheng immediately balances his weight, only to wince at the pressure he’s placed on his bad leg. “I’m not injured.”

“I’ve been sick very often," Wen Ning says gently, "and I had to learn how to adjust my posture to compensate for it.” He finally meets Jiang Cheng’s gaze, a smile tugging at his lips but not quite forming. “I can show you how.”

Jiang Cheng stares at the bow in Wen Ning’s hand. “I don’t need help." He lifts his chin toward the waterfall. "Let’s compete if you’re so crafty. I challenge you.”

Wen Ning takes a step back, his lips parted. “Ch-Challenge?”

“You’ve got the guts to try to fix my stance, but not to compete against me?”

“Well...” Wen Ning clutches his bow with both hands and rubs his thumbs on the leather grip. “I j-just...I get too nervous in competitions."

Jiang Cheng sets his jaw. “Then do it now. If you can compete against just me, you won’t be so nervous other times.”

“But...but...”

Jiang Cheng raises his eyebrows, a little twitch that’s somehow aggressive and meek at the same time. “What? Is there a problem with that?”

“Well, if you’re going to help me stop feeling nervous about competing," Wen Ning says, "then why can’t I help you with your posture first?”

Jiang Cheng looks stumped for a moment, then shakes his head. “I don’t need it,” he says flatly.

Wen Ning thinks back to how he’s seen Wei Wuxian prod at Jiang Cheng with nothing but words and a taunting cross of his arms. Wen Ning crosses his own arms, stands up a little taller, and says, “If you don’t let me help, then I won’t compete against you.”

With a scoff, Jiang Cheng draws his shoulders up and clenches his fists. “Fine. Just do it quick.” After a few moments, he strings his bow and holds his aim steady at the waterfall.

...That was easy.

After backing up to examine Jiang Cheng’s stance from different angles, Wen Ning slowly approaches him. He presses down on Jiang Cheng’s elbow, lowering the angle of his arm holding the arrow. Then he wraps his other hand around Jiang Cheng’s body to grip the underside of his outstretched arm.

As he adjusts Jiang Cheng’s posture, tugging him into the correct stance and sinking his fingers further into white robes, Wen Ning becomes embarrassingly aware of how broad Jiang Cheng’s shoulders are. His whole torso, actually. It would probably feel nice to hug him from behind.

Heat spreads across Wen Ning’s cheeks. He wrestles the thought away, grateful that Jiang Cheng can’t see his face right now.

“Okay,” Wen Ning says, though it comes out more like a choked sound, and pulls away to let Jiang Cheng shoot.

The arrow hits a rock in the waterfall head-on, shattering it.

Jiang Cheng grins, then immediately suppresses the smile and gives a dignified nod. “Not bad.” He lowers his bow and looks toward Wen Ning, not quite meeting his eyes. “...Thanks.”

A hum vibrates happily in Wen Ning’s chest, and he nods back.

“Now are you going to compete?” As soon as Jiang Cheng’s voice rises with that combative tone again, he glares at Wen Ning with the same mixture of sharpness and shyness as earlier, like a sword that doesn't want to swing.

“I’ll do my best, Jiang-gongzi,” Wen Ning says cheerfully and heads back to his spot on the stream’s bank, for once excited for a competition rather than sick with anxiousness.

Maybe archery is a good way to get close to someone after all. Although...for a moment, that had been a little too close.

Wen Ning wouldn’t mind doing it again sometime.

* * *

Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed this story, you can be a supportive sibling like Jiang Yanli by visiting me on AO3!

I’m still taking art/writing requests from this ask meme if anyone wants to indulge me 👀

#mdzs fanfiction #the untamed fanfiction #mdzsnet #chengning #wen ning #jiang cheng #mdzs fanfic #the untamed fanfic #cql fanfic #mdzs #the untamed #cql #ningcheng #jiang wanyin #wen qionglin #emilu fics #emilu creations

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adhd-wifi · 4 years

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Why Not? AU Where Wei Ying Has His Birth Parents And Isn’t A Cultivator (Part 1)

Kinda a fic idea I’ve had in mind for a while, I’m never gonna write it cuz it’s long and I suck at committing to long fics for the most part but damn it won’t leave me alone and I wanted to share it lol. I’m splitting it into parts for now, cuz otherwise this will be too fucking long, but anyway here’s part one:

Wei ChangZe and CangSe Sanren are alive and take care of Wei Ying while maintaining a decent relationship with the Jiang Sect purely out of sentiment

CangSe Sanren remains a rogue cultivator, while Wei ChangZe is a skilled fighter but not a proper cultivator due to being a servant for the Jiang Sect for most of his life

Madam Yu still doesn’t like the Wei family but is civil with them cuz Jiang FengMian isn’t as neglectful since he’s not dealing with the grief of losing his best friend and first love

Jiang Cheng and Wei Ying do not like each other (they’re lying), Jiang YanLi loves them both

Wei Ying isn’t scared of dogs in this AU cuz he never had to fight them for survival, though he’s indifferent to them

He prefers rabbits

The Wei family travels for most of Wei Ying’s childhood, but eventually settle in Yiling, and Wei Ying begins learning to read and fight (self-defence)

Wei Ying is fascinated by cultivation, but doesn’t really want to be a cultivator cuz he thinks they’re too hung up on status and politics

Let’s be honest tho he ain’t wrong

He does want to learn how to use a sword though, and the Jiang Sect allows him to be a non-official disciple for a few years to learn

Madam Yu and his mom train him together sometimes (as Jiang FengMian has to train the actual disciples and also cuz Madam Yu doesn’t want him alone with CangSe Sanren)

CangSe Sanren also helps train Jiang Cheng and Jiang YanLi in using talismans and the like, since neither Jiang parent has her level of skill with those

Outside of the Jiang Sect, the Wei parents tends to help and befriend smaller sects when they travel to night hunt (Jiang Sect play babysitter for Wei Ying during these times)

As a result, they have minor connections to the Baling OuYang Sect, Yueyang Chang Sect, and MianMian’s unnamed sect (novel-canon, and I’m probably gonna name it the Tanzhou Yang Sect for reasons)

As a result, Wei Ying is casual friends with some kids his age from said sects, such as OuYang ZiZhen’s future parents and MianMian herself

However he doesn’t meet anyone from the major sects outside the Jiang family and disciples (yet)

Around the time Jiang Cheng goes to study in Gusu, Wei Ying completes his sword training and turns down Jiang FengMian’s offer to stay as a proper disciple

Jiang FengMian gifts him with a non-spiritual sword, which Wei Ying names SuiBian

Wei Ying and his family return to Yiling and Wei Ying decides to primarily work around town to earn some more stable income for his parents

Farm helper Wei Ying time, and he’s old enough to be alone at home while his parents go night hunting for long periods now

One day his parents return from a visit to the Jiang Sect, both worried, and they tell Wei Ying that the Cloud Recesses in Gusu has been attacked by the Wen Sect

They tell him to go stay with someone in Yiling while they go and look for the missing Lan Sect leaders who had escaped the attack

Wei Ying is scared for them, and has a bad feeling of something bad happening, but does as they ask

Weeks go by and Wei Ying hears nothing of his parents or the Jiangs, but during that time some Wen Sect members (led by Wen Qing) arrive and take over the Yiling Supervisory Office

Despite knowing that the Wen Sect was responsible for his worries, Wei Ying tries to approach them and find out what’s happening

He meets an upset Wen Ning on the way there, and despite recognizing the Wen robes he goes to comfort him

Wen Ning is upset about the upcoming indoctrination, but is unable to talk to anyone within the sects about it, so he’s relieved to be able to talk to Wei Ying

After this, however, Wei Ying is more worried than ever, but he has a good feeling about Wen Ning so he tells Wen Ning he’s going to head to Yunmeng to talk to the Jiang Sect about it

Wen Ning doesn’t oppose him, though he asks that Wei Ying not mention him

With that agreement in place, Wei Ying heads to Yunmeng alone

I’m mixing up the timeline quite a bit, not gonna lie, and don’t worry I’m not going to kill his parents I promise. Also there’s still gonna be wangxian it’s just even more of a slowburn than canon.

#mdzs #mo dao zu shi #wei ying #wei wuxian #cangse sanren #wei changze #jiang cheng #jiang yanli #wen ning #jiang fengmian #yu ziyuan #mdzs au #i have no idea what to call this au #wangxian #mdzs fic ideas #my fic ideas #my posts #my ramblings

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llycaons · 3 years

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well no 25 tonight because I clicked something that refreshed the dash and I lost the past half hour’s worth of writing and I have work in the morning but whatever I guess, here’s 24 as best as I can recall. next time I’m using the drafts feature

genuinely a very wholesome and sweet episode, a jumping-around episode, a filling-in-the-gaps-episode.

jc, while aware of politics and practical about them, is not a brilliant political mind, and unlike all of the other sect leaders, he has no elders and only one strong aide. he needs wwx, as a clean leader, desperately. and for the three siblings, I think they handle this incident with a lot of dignity, with yanli falling back on an image of a dutiful daughter to a dead sect leader to deflect jgs’s offer. but it only worked because wwx was smart enough to flatter while opposing jgs, so they came off looking grateful and filial instead of repulsed by jgs’s outrageous gall. and not all political leaders are shrewd thinkers, they just need to have good aides and allies in the cultivation world (or be very loud and go with the majority opinion...looking at you sect leader yao)

seriously, lxc has lqr and other unnamed elders plus his brother, nmj definitely has counselors and military commanders (and experience, and a hard-won reputation of being dangerous to fuck with), and jgs probably lost none of his inner circle to the war. plus he has that slippery scheming brilliant son of his desperate for his approval. lxc and nmj and jgy are sworn brothers and personal friends (except jgy and nmj lol). jc has literally nobody with a position of authority to help him out except wwx

the way jgy smiles when wwx interrupted the banquet was so ominous. like wwx, he is incredibly resourceful. but while wwx will use anything to achieve his goals, jgy will use anyone

wait. how were the yin iron fragments destroyed? wasn’t it impossible? wwx was asleep or it could have been the STA.

jfm gave little wwx the exact same advice for archery that he gave sixth junior brother. what jfm, no new insights after almost a decade? typical

jc is...a terrible leader tbh. he starts alright with promising to protect jiang sect but he immediately falls back into myu’s tactic of harsh criticism and personal attack. he doesn’t want to appear weak to his disciples, but he isn’t helping boost confidence very much. yanli keeps things together because she is an angel. meanwhile wwx is in an alcohol-soaked depressive episode that looks very much like a fun jaunt to the city probably because he can't bear to be in LP sober and no longer has a war to focus his energy on or lwj around him to make him feel better

lqr, as an elder and the uncle of the twin jades, has the authority to give even lxc orders. he doesn’t seem concerned with the wen civilians being murdered, but soothing resentment is an important job of a cultivator. he send lxc out but he’s clocked how lwj feels about wwx and decides that’s too risky to let develop. bit late for that, lqr, that boy is gone. like, did it really take you this long to notice?

but lwj is a stubborn caring fool who thinks that if he plays the right music well enough, wwx will be okay and happy again and stop destroying himself with resentful energy, so he defies his uncle’s orders, sneaks behind his back, and breaks into the forbidden music library to memorize secret super-powerful music in the name of gay love

everyone, have I mentioned how much I love lan wangji? I really, really love lan wangji

could music have helped? such a straightforward answer to a complicated problem, naturally lwj would gravitate towards a clear fix. that’s very like him

but the things that wwx went through in these past episodes, it’s impossible to walk away from without both serious emotional scars as well as being in danger of qi-deviation. so maybe lwj frantically finding music and internally muttering “surely THIS will be the thing to save him” may have helped him settle the spirits, but what would have ultimately been more healing would be...support, understanding, maybe jc learning about the gc and cutting him slack, less responsibility in LP and the chance to focus on himself and only himself, the chance to leave LP and not feel guilty for it, not being judged or targeted or punished or rushed, feeling safe enough to tell the truth about what happened and work with his friends and family to reduce harm on himself. he needs to change his mindset and how he conceptualizes his own suffering, I think. it’s not that lwj is wrong about the music helping, exactly, but he hasn’t identified the underlying problem here. for the circumstances, I don’t know if all this would be possible. it all feels very inevitable

lwj’s very quiet struggle with his own principles and standards of behavior, his conception of evil and good, his own forming moral code, and his slowly changing adherence to laws is such a great arc, and I find it a real shame that it’s so background. like a lot of things about lwj, this arc is subtle and not much is stated explicitly, so you have to really pay attention and read between the lines to get the full impact. maybe that means it’s written in a way that’s very attuned to his character, lol

lxc and wwx meeting is an EXCELLENT scene between brothers-in-law. wwx feeling at ease enough to openly joke about drinking in CR directly TO of the clan leader which is so ajsdkfhdkdf and I do love the gentle way lxc reminds wwx that lwj really cares about him. and that wwx was all ready to visit gusu for a chance to see lwj copy lines lol. he only pulls back when lxc mentions getting him back to the way of the sword. but I find it notable here that he says he does trust lxc and lwj. it’s just...he really doesn’t think they can help and he needs to keep his appearance of strength. for himself, and for jc, and for the jiangs

wwx says he was in gusu a few years ago - is that 2-3 years? maybe 15 at gusu is too young. I didn’t think the training arc/massacre/campaign took overall more than a year, and then another year and a half at BM, then he’s dead. I figured he was 20 or 21 at nightless.

oh god, he’s less than two years away from killing himself in this scene

after lxc’s failed intervention, wwx’s return to LP is a disaster. and jc doesn’t even mean to keep hurting him, he doesn’t know! regardless, wwx has to seek out yanli to feel safe again because dealing with jc when he’s in a good mood and doesn’t have to be lied to must be tiring enough, not to mention now

adults babytalking is so fucking obnoxious irl and it’s only okay in fictional scenarios because it’s a short scene and it’s his only way to ask to comfort or affection. and it’s kind of endearing, I guess? it reminds me of a cat. or my younger brother when he’s being cute. he loves cats too. wonder if wwx likes cats.

I love their little conversation about like-liking someone and I find wwx’s response, his fear of his own feelings, really interesting and tbh underexplored in fanbase. he’s not worried about being trapped by a person, but by his own love for someone. that he’s concerned about it interfering with his goals or freedom rather than excited about exploring that potential relationship with another person...that’s actually very sad to me. it’s true he’s scared of sincerity and maybe of how strong his own feelings are but it’s also like he doesn’t prioritize his own happiness. was he always like this? was gusu-era wwx ever shy, or did he just not realize what this was yet?

wwx openly talking about how yanli is the one reason jc hasn’t killed him yet is, in hindsight, horrifying (also, wwx calls jc a-cheng when talking to yanli, ha). I know it’s mostly a joke but genuinely if yanli had left to get married and jc and wwx had to live together they would both be SO miserable

what happened was so awful for everyone and I want wwx to have a link to his family here again, but lbr he would have been with no core or support or open affection struggling with his trauma and loneliness alongside another teenager dealing with his own issues and they never communicate properly, they fight all the time, they disagree about core ideals, wwx can’t help hm in the way jc expects him to, like my god they love each other but this is not a sustainable relationship and wwx deserves better than that. and jc needs to be able to form and maintain relationships without his sister or brother acting as his anger translator, for his own sake.

after all he’d done for LP and the jiangs, maybe the kindest thing would be to let wwx go...but does he really want to? I think even now it’s a hard question for him. maybe more in this episode than any other time in the show though

yanli telling wwx he’s always happy, whatever happens, sounds so cruel when you know he’s undergoing such suffering and only smiling through it for the sake of everyone else. yanli didn’t mean it like that and I think he did find a lot of peace in that moment with her but it always felt like such a curse to me.

the final scene is so sweet....siblings bickering about soup and yanli teasing jc who straightens his robes in mock seriousness...this lives in my mind forever.. when they’re at their best with each other

oh wait but then jc implies that jgy will always be a social inferior to his half-brother and isn’t worth praising or getting to know, which wwx looks offended at, because hey, wwx is a social inferior too!

but jc also reminds wwx that he has a real political position to uphold so behave, etc. which to his credit, I really think he tries to. it’s just some things can’t be swept under the rug for the sake of appearances. wen qing...

and the last scene where wwx starts to realize he can actually feel joy again after all the horrible things that happened to him...such a beautiful dreamlike sequence

#I've lost so many good sentences just now I am so fucking mad #drafts it is for the next 26 episodes #cql rewatch #long post

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multsicorn · 4 years

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Wei Wuxian makes families everywhere he goes.

[this got... long]

The first one, of course, is kind of cheating. In Yunmeng Jiang, he’s taken in as a kid. Jiang Cheng is made to share his bedroom with him. And yet, though they were raised as siblings, Jiang Cheng, Jiang Yanli, and Wei Wuxian really did have to choose each other - and being ‘as siblings’ was also a choice. Jiang Fengmian wanted it, set them up for it, (... sibling favoritism and all, lol), but Yu Ziyuan continually scolded her children for treating ‘the son of a servant’ as a beloved brother. Both parents set Jiang Yanli and especially Jiang Cheng in competition against Wei Wuxian... and all three kids responded by choosing each others’ sides, by trying to take care of each other, by becoming closer than ever.

The second one is in the Burial Mounds. I’ve gone on a bit about that ;). ‘Sometimes a family is two mad scientists and a zombie who owe each other a series of mutually escalating life-debts’? And also several dozen more war refugees, from elderly down to children, don’t forget that. It is very incredibly unfortunate if one’s obligations to one’s new family conflict with one’s obligations to one’s earlier (but still present! not former!) other family - but, I mean, if you bring someone back from the dead with the asterisk that you can control them, whether you want to or not; if you’re co-running a village with someone... you’re some sort of family.

(What I always want, personally, is pretty much everyone else important to Wei Wuxian, and also therefore to the story, to ally themselves with and roll right up to the Burial Mounds, in ones or twos or with a whole crowd of followers.)

(My favorite sect really is Yiling Wei, huh. Of course it is.)

And then, the third one, of course, is in the Cloud Recesses. Eventually. resurrection, and only under the auspices of Lan Wangji’s most murderously protective glares. But also with Lan Xichen, who has always been kind and welcoming and encouraging to Wei Wuxian, who’s all fucked up about all kinds of things and still values his baby brother’s happiness. With Lan Qiren, who’s disapproved of him for years.... like Yu Ziyuan hadn’t? Wei Wuxian is chill and older and can deal with disapproval, and, anyway, I have faith that Lan Qiren can change.

With Lan Sizhui!!! Returned from the radish patch, all unlooked for!!! Man, there’s just something that moves me so much about someone who has all sorts of other obligations choosing to take on looking after a young child, too, because someone has to and who else is there, and, yes, becoming that child’s parent. And so I will read Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji as Sizhui’s dads, no matter that it’s arguable vis-a-vis canon. But I’m not usually even into the pairings I ship having children together - I mean, I’m not necessarily against it? but I’m not invested, I don’t care - ‘they have a son’ was used to try to sell me on this canon back in last winter, and I really don’t care - but the narrative with Sizhui is just. So wonderful. To me.

(and that got away from me a bit, lol.) But I was going to say! In the Cloud Recesses, with the most loving and devoted and protective husband in the whole damn world, with an approving brother-in-law and a disapproving uncle-in-law, with an adopted kid who turns out to already have been his own, and a whole contingent of young Lan disciples that Wei Wuxian has already pretty much picked up as his very own students/trainees just by virtue of them encountering a dangerous situation or three together. He thrives as a teacher, and he deserves the whole multi-clan duckling assemblage, but Lan Jingyi and his unnamed peers are a pretty big component of that.

Anyway, the point is: family’s additive. Let him have ALL the families.

The other point is: Wei Wuxian makes a home wherever he goes. He’s never had one home (and that’s it). His parents were wanderers, Yunmeng wasn’t his first home. Cloud Recesses... might not be his last? But he’s adaptable, more so than the lotuses he will grow wherever he can. He doesn’t need to be in one specific place. And he shapes a place by being there.

And the third point is: ... Wei Wuxian, throughout his teen and adult lives, latches onto everyone. Anyone in need of his protection, or help... but as a kid? Jiang Fengmian may have brought him to live in Lotus Pier, but it’s Jiang Yanli who brought him back from running into the woods, who insisted you belong here. (And insisted the same thing to bb!Jiang Cheng, while we’re at it.) Anything he knows about making other people his? Wei Wuxian learned from his shijie.

And the fourth point: ... (you thought we were done with points? But I have more family things to talk about, so there!) Is that, of course, that Wei Wuxian’s an orphan. So maybe he’s always looking for more family. But he perks up hopefully and/or wistfully not just when hearing about his mother, but when anyone mentions his mother’s teacher. Baoshen Sanren, who lives on the mountain. There’s something there, but he could never find it... but when he meets Xiao Xingchen, one of her other disciples, he makes something of that connection. Though they only travel together briefly (and then, later, of course, Xiao Xingchen dies).

So family can mean so very many different kinds of things. A small nuclear family, too, small because the parents have left their homes behind; a lineage of teachers and disciples. It doesn’t even have to stay in one place.

... I do think Wei Wuxian would like staying in one place, I think it would suit his domestic instincts well. And any place he stays is not gonna have everyone he loves in it, most of the biggest shots of the cultivation world! are his family. Beware every reunion. But I also think he’s good at being happy, and making a place where he fits, everywhere that he goes.

#wei wuxian #the untamed #we could live by the foot of the mountain

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trishmilburn · 5 years

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An Exploration of The Untamed’s Romance & Mystery, Episode 4

Disclaimer: This post and others in this series will be filled with loads of spoilers if you haven’t seen The Untamed, the Chinese drama based on Mo Xiang Tong Xiu’s novel, Mo Dao Zu Shi (The Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation). My chief interest in doing this series as I re-watch the drama is to chronicle the development of the romance between Wei Ying and Lan Zhan, but I also highlight the progression of the mystery that helps bring them together. Keep in mind that I’m writing these posts with the knowledge of what’s going to happen throughout the series and having read the novel. If you’d like to read my examinations of previous episodes, links are provided at the end of this post.

On to Episode 4...

This episode starts off with the camera panning piles of scattered papers with phrases such as “Banish Demons,” “Establish Laws” and “Immortalize Dao” written on them. A gong sound is heard in the distance, and suddenly Wei Ying sits up from underneath some of these papers and we realize he fell asleep while writing out his punishment from the previous episode. Because, of course he did. This Wei Ying, he’s easily bored.

There’s a lot of rules stuff in this episode, so no surprise that the next thing we see is a carved stone that says, “Propriety suggests reciprocity. It is impolite not to reciprocate.” Oh, Wei Ying is so going to break this rule, too, because he’s a little nonconformist and isn’t afraid to challenge the norm.

All the disciples from the various clans are sitting in class and one of the white-clad Lans starts reading out the list of Gusu Lan Sect’s more than 3,000 house rules. Honestly, how can anyone memorize all that? Do the Lans have eidetic memories? Anyway, Lan Zhan looks tense. (Hmm, is that because a very attractive but irritating person has unexpectedly grabbed your attention and you know he’s in the room, and if you turn just a little to your right you can see him?) Wei Ying, as one might expect, looks bored. I’m with Wei Ying on this one. Probably because he’s so hyperaware of Wei Ying’s position in the room, Lan Zhan becomes aware of Wei Ying’s restlessness and looks at him out of the corner of his eye.

Of particular interest during all this rule reading (not to mention foreshadowing) are these three rules:

1. Your forehead ribbon (which all the Lans wear) reminds you of self-restraint.

2. You are not allowed to use other people’s headbands without authorization.

3. You cannot use your headband in any other ways.

Oh, how both Wei Ying and Lan Zhan are going to fail to obey these particular rules!

Bored Wei Ying becomes aware of a chirping sound and starts looking around to see where it’s coming from. Turns out Nie Huaisang is pretty bored, too, and shows Wei Ying what he literally has up his sleeve – a pretty little goldfinch in a wee cage. They start whispering back and forth, until Huaisang sees that Lan Zhan has noticed them. Huaisang immediately stops talking, followed by Wei Ying, who wears one of those expressions seen on the face of many a little boy when he’s caught misbehaving, as if it say, “Who me? I wasn’t talking.” Lan Zhan responds by giving Wei Ying the patented Lan Wangji Death Stare.

All this reading of rules that is going on throughout isn’t totally random. Some of them have deep meaning for what is to come. For instance, there is one about not belittling or taking advantage of the weak. Eventually, Wei Ying is going to stand alone in protecting the remnants of the Wen clan who had nothing to do with all the horrible things their relatives did.

But back to Wei Ying’s current antics. He smiles the patented Wei Wuxian Mile-Wide Smile and waves at Lan Zhan (Wei Ying really is like a puppy who just wants you to be his friend), but Lan Zhan turns away in annoyance. (I’d like to pause for a moment here to say how much I love romances where the couple start out as adversaries, then become friends, then friends become lovers, which is the track these two are going to travel.)

After all the many, many rules have been read, amazingly the students are not all comatose. In fact, thus begins the next stage of the most boring first day of school ever – the official greetings of each clan to their teacher, Lan Qiren, in which they give him thoughtful, fancy gifts. When Meng Yao accompanies Nie Huaisang to the front, carrying the Nie sect’s gift, a couple of unnamed dudes in the corner start whispering about how Meng Yao is the illegitimate son of the Jin clan’s leader and how after he was kicked out of the Jins’ Golden Unicorn Tower (this place also has several names, depending on the translation), he was taken in by the Nie sect. Seeing Meng Yao and Nie Huaisang here together is sad because I know what is coming farther down the road between these two.

Seeing this, sweet Lan Xichen comes forward and compliments Meng Yao as he accepts the Nie sect’s gift. Though Mo Xiang Tong Xiu has said the only gay couple in this story is Wei Ying and Lan Zhan, there are lots of shippers for a Lan Xichen and Meng Yao pairing, and I feel like the creators of The Untamed totally tossed those shippers some delicious crumbs by the way these two look at each other here and how Xichen’s fingers linger over Meng Yao’s as he accepts the gift from him. You can also interpret this interaction as Xichen simply offering support and friendship in an embarrassing moment for Meng Yao, but it’s definitely one of those scenes that are open to fan interpretation.

Next up the red-clad Wen clan shows up outside the entrance to the Cloud Recesses, led by the odious Wen Chao. (Have I mentioned I hate that guy?) As happened with the Jiangs when they arrived, the Wens are asked for their invitation. This, like most things, makes Wen Chao mad. He’s really full of himself and is offended that the Wens would be asked for such a thing, and he proceeds to set one of the Lans on fire with his fire magic. Wen Qing steps forward and puts out the fire, then tells Wen Chao to, basically, chill because the Chief Cultivator (Wen Ruohan, Wen Chao’s father) told them to not make a scene. Wen Chao snarls, tossing out that this was nothing, and walks right into the Cloud Recesses like he owns the place. Much like Lan Zhan has before, we see Wen Qing gripping her sword tightly. Yeah, she doesn’t like Wen Chao either.

Wen Chao strolls into the lecture room, interrupting Jiang Cheng’s greeting to Lan Qiren on behalf of the Jiang sect. Everyone is surprised to see them since the Wens have never attended any of the previous lecture series. When this is pointed out, Wen Chao says there is no need, implying the Wens are smarter and above such teachings. And yet, he’s there to deliver someone to attend.

Lan Zhan is pissed at his rudeness and starts to step forward, but Xichen shakes his head, telling him silently to let it go. Wei Ying, however, is not one to stay quiet in such a situation and calls Wen Chao out on his arrogance. Wen Chao has a typical overreaction, and even Jiang Cheng says it was a simple disagreement. But Wen Chao is determined to teach the Jiang clan a lesson and his henchmen rush in with swords drawn. Really, Wen Chao is the king of overreaction. Wei Ying, Jiang Cheng and others draw their own swords in response. To end this standoff before it turns bloody, Xichen pulls out Liebing, his xiao (a vertical, end-blown flute) and starts playing. Suddenly, all the drawn swords are magically pulled up toward the ceiling before falling and stabbing into the floor (RIP, lovely floorboards).

Meng Yao, who had positioned himself in a protective stance in front of Nie Huaisang (again, sad because of my knowledge of what is coming), looks at Xichen after he stops playing, and his expression indicates at the very least admiration for Xichen.

After the Wens depart and the lessons end for the day, Wei Ying walks out with Jiang Cheng and Nie Huaisang, and Huaisang compliments him on how he stood up to Wen Chao, saying, “Brother Wei, if I had your guts, wouldn’t that be great for me?” He doesn’t, however, and that will play into future decisions that will affect not only Wei Ying but also a great many other people.

Wei Ying sees Lan Zhan and calls out to him, calling him Brother Ji, but once again Lan Zhan ignores him. You can almost see the speech bubble above Lan Zhan: Why is this guy so weird and loud? LOL.

Cut to Lan Xichen, who is telling his uncle Qiren that he fears the Wens have ulterior motives for attending the lectures when they never have before. He also wonders if there is a connection between the Wen clan’s fire magic and the ghost puppets. Qiren says that since the Wens took over the Chief Cultivator seat, they’ve been acting weird, oppressing the weak, taking in countless retainers and making their main clan manor, Heavenly Nightless, into a city more than a manor. Interesting he says that last part since it eventually becomes known as Heavenly Nightless City.

When Xichen leaves and heads outside, he encounters Meng Yao, who has been waiting for him before he leaves to go back to the Nie sect’s home. He wanted to thank Xichen for saving him from embarrassment earlier, but Xichen says there’s no need because they are peers. This is likely something Meng Yao has never heard from anyone before, and thus it cements his affection for Xichen, no matter what kind of affection it is.

While exploring the back of the mountain at the Cloud Recesses, Wen Qing discovers an invisible barrier. Wei Ying, who had been in the stream nearby goofing off with Huaisang, trying to catch fish, hears Wen Qing and goes to intercept her. He sees she is holding a needle and learns she’s the Wen sect’s female physician he’s heard of, but when he asks her why she’s in this forbidden area (no matter that he’s also there, that’s just how he rolls), she refuses to tell him and walks away.

Next we see Jiang Yanli coming into a courtyard with a big pot of soup she’s made, and nearby Jiang Cheng is practicing sword movements. He’s talking to his sister about his worries about Wei Ying causing problems, and Yanli takes up for Wei Ying because she has a big soft spot for him. This doesn’t go unnoticed by her brother, who also notes how his father likes Wei Ying more than he does his own son. When Wei Ying shows up with grilled fish on sticks, he teases Jiang Cheng. Yanli, always the peacemaker, plays that role between these two yet again.

Oh, and we’re back to more boring lectures and rules, rules, rules. One pair of those rules is: Feel sorrow for being evil. Be happy for helping others. In the future, Wei Ying is going to be accused of being evil while he’s helping others. Once again, Lan Zhan gives Wei Ying a death stare when he catches him cutting up in class. Wei Ying responds by sending one of his magical paper men sailing over to Lan Zhan, who wastes no time crumpling it in his fist. Ah, there will be a time in the future when you don’t mind Wei Ying’s little paper men at all, Lan Zhan.

Qiren also notices Wei Ying misbehaving and puts him on the spot, asking him a series of questions, all of which Wei Ying answers correctly. This seems to annoy and impress Lan Zhan at the same time, though he would never admit that last part. Qiren isn’t so impressed though, saying that the mere fact that Wei Ying grew up with the Jiangs had been enough to be able to answer those questions so his ability to do so is nothing to be particularly proud of. So he poses a more difficult hypothetical, and when Wei Ying doesn’t provide an answer Qiren turns to Lan Zhan, who provides what is a textbook perfect answer that has no doubt been drilled into his head repeatedly during his entire life. But then Wei Ying says that there might indeed be another way to deal with the situation, using resentful energy the same way that spiritual energy is used to deal with vengeful wraiths. This idea of using an “evil path” of cultivation infuriates Lan Qiren, who tells Lan Zhan to take Wei Ying to the library and have him copy something called Proprietary Regulations 1,000 times. If he’s not careful, all Wei Ying is going to get out of this lecture series is carpal tunnel syndrome.

Instead of going to the library, Wei Ying hies off to the back area of the Cloud Recesses again, where he finds cutie pie cinnamon roll Wen Ning practicing his archery. (Yu Bin was another bit of brilliant casting in the role of Wen Ning.) Wei Ying compliments his talent but says he needs to work on his posture and proceeds to help him. Wen Qing shows up and is irritated her sweet brother is being friendly when they are not there to make friends. While she just seemed shrill and unfriendly on the first viewing at this point, now I know that she is dealing with the knowledge of the precarious situation she and her brother are in with Wen Ruohan, as we’ll see later on. She interrupts them just as Wen Ning lets loose another arrow, and it causes him to turn and the arrow to fly straight for her. Wei Ying jumps in to save the day, deflecting the arrow with a paper talisman, and then asks why he’s always running into Wen Qing at the back of the mountain. He teases her, asking if she’s following him or looking for something. She accuses him of talking nonsense, then takes her brother and leaves.

Wei Ying, left alone, wonders if the Cloud Recesses really is hiding secrets. A sound from behind him has him pulling his sword and battling a potential assailant until he recognizes that it’s Lan Zhan, who has come to take his delinquent butt to the library. The episode ends with Wei Ying sheathing his sword and giving Lan Zhan another one of those big, happy smiles that are never reciprocated.

These two, they are so obviously drawn together, but neither of them recognizes the true reason why. And while Wei Ying is likely just thinking, oh cool, I’d like to be this guy’s friend, I can wear anyone down with my exuberant personality, Lan Zhan is just resisting the pull that he probably doesn’t even realize is a pull. Fight it all you want, Lan Zhan, you’re going to fall for him anyway.

Previous posts in this series:

Episode 1

Episode 2

Episode 3

#the untamed #wei ying #lan zhan #wei wuxian #lan wangji #grandmaster of demonic cultivation #lan xichen #meng yao #nie huaisang #wen ning #wen qing #wen chao #lan qiren #jiang cheng #yu bin #jiang yanli #wangxian

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thatgirlonstage · 5 years

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but don't let that stop you from writing your own and by 'dont let that stop you' i do mean 'please please please write your own i will die of happiness'

@fluffyblue-multifandommess oh good, good, see, the thing is, the thing is I’ve really really been wanting to write, but I was having trouble focusing on my WIPs and I wasn’t finding inspiration for anything short, but then last night I had an idea for an opening line for this fic, and thought oh what the hell I’ll just write that down for later, except then I knew what the next sentence was too, and then at some point I looked at the clock again and it was 3AM, and I wrote this last night instead of sleeping, is what I’m saying

(I may end up posting this to Ao3 but I want to at least finish reading the novel before I take a final run at editing it lol)

———

He’s lying quiet, now.

It was a sight Lan WangJi never thought he’d see, Wei WuXian quiet and still, and now he’s rapidly taking back every moment he wished for it. There’s something terrifying about his slack, empty face, the shallow breaths shivering through barely parted lips, the absence of even so much as a flicker of an eyelid. That face isn’t meant to be so still. It’s a face made for laughter, for sly smiles and teasing winks, for that infuriating smug expression he gets whenever he makes Lan WangJi lose his composure. That face was never meant to look so blank. Lan WangJi fixes his gaze on the barely perceptible rise and fall of Wei WuXian’s chest as he rests a finger against his feverish temple.

Just keep breathing, he thinks. He sends a trickle of spiritual energy through his finger, whatever scraps he can spare. It’s barely more than drops in a bucket at this point; he’s not sure Wei WuXian would notice it even if he were awake for it. Just keep breathing. It’s the only thing left for either of them to do. Lan WangJi tilts his head back slightly, resting it against the wall, fighting off a perverse urge to sleep. His internal clock is the only thing keeping track of the days. If he lets himself drift off, they’ll lose all ability to tell time, and he needs to keep counting the days, he needs to know how long it’s been, how much longer they might have to wait. His injured leg aches.

Even after he’d pulled him, curled up and shaking, out of Xuanwu’s mouth, even as the fever set in, Wei WuXian had still been talking. He’s always, always talking. Even while he slept at first he went in and out of muttering, and tossing and turning even after Lan WangJi relented and pulled him into his lap to let him sleep more comfortably. His forehead may have been painted with a sheen of sweat and he may have been delirious and unable to even sit upright, but that boundless, unruly energy remained, jittery and forceful. He had babbled like a madman when he woke up, bouncing between topics, the fever making his chatter even less intelligible than usual, even as Lan WangJi watched him fight for the energy to stay awake. Only acquiescing to his request to sing had gotten him to settle down and stop trying to talk, finally. His babbling had faded with his repeated, half-lucid queries about the song’s name as he lost the battle for focus and consciousness, slurring into sleep-speech. For a while, Lan WangJi hummed softly to the background of Wei WuXian’s occasional mutters and choked whimpers of pain when his shifting about rubbed his stiff and filthy robe against the infected brand on his chest, but he could practically see the last vestiges of his energy leaking out of him. Lan WangJi’s humming trailed off as he watched Wei WuXian’s tossing and turning rock to stillness and his whimpers go silent. And now, he’s quiet.

Just keep breathing.

Please don’t stop breathing.

Lan WangJi’s finger is still resting against Wei WuXian’s temple.

It’s pathetic, how much he can’t stand the notion of watching this boy die. He can tell himself there are plain, logical explanations for his behavior. That he saved his life, because it was ethical. He cooperated in plans to escape the cave, because it was a mutual interest. He shared medicine, because to do otherwise was to be selfish. But they’ve done everything they can do now, tried every avenue to mutually ensure their survival, and the only thing left is to wait for help. There’s no obligation, no failure, no shame he faces if he can’t save Wei WuXian. His fingers bleed with the evidence of his efforts. So the tight coil of hot, unnamed emotion in his chest, the terror that threatens to choke him every time Wei WuXian’s chest takes too long to rise with its next inhale, the almost hysterical fear that he might start crying again, that’s all just him. Him and his useless feelings for this aggravating, provoking, dangerous boy.

He lifts his head off the wall. It is not nine. He will not sleep. He has to keep track of the days, so that he knows when help will arrive. Help will arrive.

For now, though, he reaches out and, as gently as he possibly can, pulls Wei WuXian back into his lap. Wei WuXian flinches, letting out a small, mumbled sound at the change in position, but as soon as Lan WangJi has him settled, head and shoulders carefully pillowed on his thighs, he returns to his frightening stillness. Lan WangJi reaches down and strand by strand moves away the hair stuck to Wei WuXian’s forehead by lake water and sweat. He brushes it back so lightly his own fingers barely feel it.

“You’re a terrible person, Wei WuXian,” he says quietly. He gets no reaction. He lets his hand rest on Wei WuXian’s forehead.

His grief for the Cloud Recesses’ destruction, for his father, for the wanton tyranny of the Wens and the blows they have dealt to his clan and his sect throb in the back of his head, aching in harmony with his leg. It’s no longer as sharp and overwhelming as the first night, when he had felt himself splitting into pieces in front of Wei WuXian. He can’t remember when he had last cried. He’s not certain if he can remember ever crying at all. It felt childish and primal and almost surreal. And yet — he keeps his eyes fixed carefully on Wei WuXian’s chest, on the tiny but consistent expand and fall — and yet, he thinks that if Wei WuXian were to cease breathing, he would wail his grief until his voice gave out.

He leans forward carefully, his hair — beginning to knot and mat from days of neglect — falling on either side of Wei WuXian’s face. “You are a very stupid person, Wei WuXian,” he whispers. His eyes roam over Wei WuXian’s features. He still does not respond with so much as a twitch. “You are an impossible person, Wei WuXian,” he adds.

“I cannot watch you die, Wei WuXian.”

Just keep breathing.

At some point, he has leaned so far down that his face is close enough to feel Wei WuXian’s breath. His eyes slide closed for a moment, taking comfort in the puffs of air against his cheek, before he sits back up. His eyes stay on Wei WuXian’s face. After a moment, he starts to hum again. He drifts off key and struggles for focus, but he imagines it makes Wei WuXian breathe a little bit easier, and so he doesn’t stop. He sings so quietly he can feel it more than he can hear it, and pretends to himself that the way one hand brushes over Wei WuXian’s forehead and other comes up to gently cradle his cheek is mindless. He is only checking his fever, or trying to soothe him so he stays asleep. Wei WuXian should keep sleeping. It would do him no good to wake up and start wasting energy by trying to chat again. That he might wake up and not try to talk is not something Lan WangJi is willing to picture.

At some point, despite his efforts, he drifted asleep himself, because he wakes to the sound of falling dirt, and distant shouts from the cave mouth. His heart seizes in his chest. His eyes dart down. Wei WuXian’s chest is still moving. He sags against the wall with relief, and leans down again, until his mouth is right next to Wei WuXian’s ear.

“They came,” he whispers. “They’re here. You’re going to be alright.” He stays there an impossibly long moment, before, for a barely an instant, he turns his face toward Wei WuXian so that his lips brush against Wei WuXian’s temple, lighter than air. Then, he very carefully shifts Wei WuXian back onto the ground, setting his head down as gently as he can. He climbs, wobbling and aching, to his feet, carefully brushes off his clothes as best he can, and calls out to the people breaking open the sealed up cave.

There is a sudden confusing mess of people, triumphant and relieved shouts overwhelming his ears, the blur of robes and faces incomprehensible. Jiang Cheng lifts up the still-unconscious Wei WuXian to fly him out of the cave on a borrowed sword. Someone Lan WangJi does not recognize and is too exhausted and distracted to introduce himself to properly helps him onto another sword and flies him up, steadying him with his arm. A crowd of Jiang Sect disciples cheer as they are brought out, and it roars dully in his ears. There’s already a crowd of bodies around Wei WuXian, hiding him from sight. Lan WangJi blinks and turns away.

#mdzs #wangxian #mo dao zu shi #my writing

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advernia · 5 years

Text

push me off a bridge (to catch me as i fall)

a separate post for my ramblings for this fic!! it’s actually the longest thing i’ve written in a while, so i have a lot to ramble about haha;;

prelude

oh man... this started when two of my friends decided to go through edgar’s route at the same time AND also decided to go reacting to every single part of the route through burst texting AT THE SAME TIME, effectively flooding my inbox.... they were fully aware that i was at a seminar and unable to reply... now my inbox is filled with so much edgar screaming i cannot... (゜▽゜;)

screaming aside they were also very willing to read whatever drafts of edgar/mc i had available and this was their favorite!! thanks to them, i decided to finish this omfg... i’m actually so proud that i got this done but tbh it was getting so long that i had half a mind to let go of it already halfway through scene three haha... (;*△*;)

this has uh... some fighting scenes and tbh the first draft had absolutely none of it... this is my first time actually writing long(?) scenes and while i found thinking about them to be fun, putting them into words was some struggle??? like... i've been told that it looks okay but idk it feels clunky to me. oh well ＼| ￣ヘ￣|／

general stuff + war phase, baby!

initially this was only meant to be 3 parts + primarily focused on edgar/mc + with an unnamed mc as usual! but then since it’s an au of kyle’s route, i found myself wanting to flesh out the relationship of edgar & mc when set in a different angle + circumstances rather than just automatically implying attraction...

plus their relationship canonically starts off on the wrong foot in that route & edgar’s fully aware that mc isn’t exactly comfortable around him, so it really doesn’t sit well if i just... put them together, lol. so thus we have five scenes of them getting(?) closer!(???)

in short its a hella slow burn and not gonna lie, when i was writing their scenes i was like f i n a l l y... bless... ಠ ּ͜೦

one of the reasons i like kyle’s route is bc i actually got some feel of an actual war??? idk i think there’s so much plot that u can fill in with it, so i decided going for alternating scenes of the battlefield + med tent. while there's glimpses of the action going on, there’s also the sort of complimenting(???) or offsetting more emotional perspective of what goes on with the medics.

tbh i stared long and hard at the cradle map when formulating some tactics and i gotta say i had a hard time calming myself down bc...

in kyle’s route, the red army has the advantage and have pushed the black army as far back as to their bridge, which means that more or less they’ve occupied central quarter... but what dawned on me was... where the hell did the red army position their encampment from there???

was an encampment even necessary given that they’re like, in a really convenient area????? they probably could’ve settled themselves in some houses but tbh okay maybe it isn’t so noble of the reds to do (imposing themselves n’ stuff) + they have larger numbers so accommodating all of them is a problem but still... where’d they set up camp??? u see, when kyle + mc step out of the med tent it shows the forest bg, so... where??? on the edges of the central quarter area are where u can see them trees??? on the civic center roof?!?!

well... a decent answer is that they could’ve set up several encampments around the area to ensure their hold on the central quarter... it still raises some questions but honestly it makes a lot more sense... but if not and they really decided to camp out like one big happy family all together, then don’t even get me started on the possibility that the camp was stationed somewhere around here:

because doing that doesn’t have a single lick of sense omfg especially tactics-wise haha... that’s like... why would you do that... you’re wasting all your advantages... o h b o y... so you bet when i remembered that mc + loki had to pass by a forest to get back to the encampment + encountered ray & some disciples i was like... u m m... why???? if technically the reds took hold of the whole central quarter area then it actually isn’t necessary to skulk around in the forest?????? yes yes i know safety precautions + avoiding detection but... dood... it’s safer to walk in claimed territory rather than the unstable one ahaha...

plus the thing about the black bridge... uh... it's just said in the route that lancelot handles it through magic and that's all. but when i thought back on it oh my god... what did he do??????? how is he still standing??? how much of his lifespan did he shave off just to salvage that situation??????????? how is the poor boi alive?????????? the whole fucking bridge literally falls apart and that's a whole lot of chaos and people and AHHHHH!?!?!¿¿¿¿ if ur gonna make the bridge collapse (good thing they didn't think of disintegrate) it probably cost the magic tower a hefty amount but get rekt lancelot still saves the fucking day, what a king - he's practically got one foot in the grave already... this dood, seriously ಥ_ಥ

there were other things i noticed in the process of writing this based on the route events but i was like fuck it, let’s think on that another day and leave it as it is (┛ಠДಠ)┛彡┻━┻ ily kyle but oh no my brain started reprocessing the other details of ur route

thinking about all that also made me think of other more stuff, like cradle economy + livelihood haha;; it’s stated in edgar’s route (well... it’s actually pretty obvious in other routes too) that the reds are richer than the blacks, so i went ahead and assumed that the former engages in something more lucrative like mining -> jewerly / raw material / mineral trade, while for the latter something more wholesome like agriculture. idk, it works. even moreso that the reds give off the whole nobility vibe while the blacks are simple and casual. even the bg screens of the red & black streets are polarizing.

then i also went over the rest of the chosen thirteen... while the reds show no obvious weapon variety (see: swords), i’d like to believe that they’re taught to be versatile enough no matter what the situation. plus, since they have the funding, i'd like to think they're skilled in magic manipulation, too. meanwhile the black army shows weapon variety, and i’d like to think that it’s because most of their recruits aren’t soldiers in the first place: they’re farmhands / hunters / village people turned soldiers, and it’s actually easier to let them go with what they know first before encouraging them or asking them to learn something new. thus axes and spears and possible unconventional stuff like caltrops.

crimson glory

one of the things i realized was in kyle’s route, mc isn’t exactly so buddy-buddy with the red crew in comparison to other routes. she gets minimal interactions with the four, and zero aside her relationships with the top three are rather... tense.

zero was the other red officer i was initially going to add aside from edgar & kyle, but i added all of them anyway. while they don't appear all together, all of them have scenes together with edgar.

the first edgar & jonah scene shows an obvious contrast - while he's being incredibly critical about it, jonah shows actual concern for the living situations in black army territory. on the other hand, edgar chooses to tease him about it, his joking more or less implying that he isn't that concerned / bothered about it at all. the game touches up on this sometimes, often with edgar commenting on how noble jonah is while jonah shows obvious distaste for edgar's callousness.

still, they work well together. personally i'm amused with a hc of mine that looking at how edgar fights / acts only spurs jonah to act more honorably while for edgar, being exposed to jonah's noble-ness more or less makes him curious to try being honorable from time to time lol. that still doesn't stop anyone from calling him the gentle demon tho ( ⚆ _ ⚆ )

tbh since edgar is obviously sneaky on other routes i wouldn't put it past him to casually pressure lancelot to tell him wtf's going on with this war when he gets the inkling that something's wrong. edgar goes about this subtly not-so-subtly and in the most polite manner possible. lancelot knows him far too well to take bait tho - he makes sure to speak carefully since he's probably knows that edgar's going to pick apart at his words for meanings + implications, so it more or less leaves edgar a bit frustrated since it's clear that lancelot won't tell him much. still, edgar knows when not to cross the line - even he's not so keen on getting on lancelot's bad side.

that aside, i'd like to think that edgar respects lancelot a lot as a person + commander enough that he'd truly risk his life for him on instinct like a true soldier would. while i think i could've done more on writing the gravity of the collapsing bridge scene, i liked the last bit where edgar + zero immediately worried for lancelot.

let's be honest here tho in some way or another all of the reds chosen worry about their king bc bruh... let us in bruh...

the scenes of zero & edgar in the end are also my favorite! it isn’t much, but enjoyed writing their relationship briefly. tbh i think edgar is one of those people under the sleep = most vulnerable = death thinking (no thanks to claudius), so the fact that he allows himself to drift to sleep twice in zero's company is a definite sign of trust. then again, he's injured but still ( ᐛ )و

edgar, idike, kyle

y’know even if this is an edgar/mc thing, i found fleshing out the kyle/mc relationship equally important which i presented in scene three. personally speaking, i’d like to think that if ever kyle didn’t fall in love with mc (on his own route???) he’d still be watching over her anyway since her struggle in the medical field + war reminds him a bit of his younger self after his brother's death.

which is why he doesn't intervene with that one soldier scene - he doesn't coddle her either when she goes into a brief shock. perhaps it's bc he knows so well what she's going through, he decides to let her handle it on her own. this was her experience, not his. and to be fair, she asked to go to the front lines determined but wholly unprepared emotionally. he tried warning her, she wouldn’t listen. now she faces the consequences - how would she go about it?

i decided to slap a name into mc this time to highlight the trust plot: idk if i got it clearly across in the fic, but in times of war + for someone who’s been trained to be suspicious / cautious of everyone like edgar; secrets are a surefire way to catch attention + breed distrust.

tbh he's hella aware that the secret around her name is most likely personal and nothing dangerous, but it's better safe than sorry - by making sure she understands that keeping secrets wouldn't be of any good to her + situation, he gets reassurance that she really is harmless. how bad + seriously she takes it honestly surprises him tho, but then again she's been going through other stuff too so it all piled up.

idike isn’t my in-game name, but it’s the given name i spoke of in this ask, haha! initially scene five has her saying her full name (with surname), but i thought it would be more fitting if i didn’t lol ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

i tried to incorporate a mix of the personalities of edgar’s!mc + kyle’s!mc onto idike, tho at first i was only shooting for the latter - i think it kinda works??? while somewhat composed and determined (kyle’s), she still shows some naivete in her (edgar’s), especially concerning the ways of war + how secrecy & trust work in times of war.

i found emphasizing on her emotional struggle important, since it should be a big blow for her who’s never known the terror of war. the game touches upon on it a bit (tho it's post-med tent scenes) and i wanted to expand on it further since there are so many possible angles to go about it.

the i can’t heal you if you’re dead line sounds like something like shiro emiya might say but lol no i just remembered this p3 manga panel (pg 24) - its been years since i read it and i still love that line and i integrated it here... i was trying to expand that one scene for a while but then i just left it as it is.

in the catharsis scene where idike airs out everything, the fact that edgar fails to empathize with her + focuses more on her emotional state rather than offering actual help (advice maybe, but i honestly doubt he’d do that) reflects that he's still looking at her as an interesting creature and not her as a person. part 5 hints that this may be slowly changing, seeing as he called for her all of a sudden.

... idike probably keeps edgar’s glove as a token of friendship or smth haha ooPSSS i forgot to bring that back ahahaha..... ヘ（。□°）ヘ

ooofff i guess that’s all i have??? a big thank you to whoever read both hot messes™ and by that the fic + commentary itself!!! do feel free to hit the inbox for any comments + questions + more brainstorming + general screaming haha! ( ´ ▽ ` )ﾉ

#rundown.txt #the last long fic i wrote was a 6k+ fe:if thing #that was 3 years ago whoooaaaa #apparently i went the extra mile for this one omfg

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