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#this took like half an hour jesus
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Odd numbers
JESUS JUST A FEW HUH hang on. 1. Would you have sex with the last person you text messaged? YES 3. Have you taken someones virginity? oH GOD, Attempted. TMI it just.. was not going in, pre-heated the oven n all that jazz but I think she was just super super nervous so we just cuddled. 5. Did you hang out with the person you like recently? Oui. 7. What happened tonight? It is 15:03 so I'll have to let u know later 9. Is confidence cute? Yeah, Like im p shy mostly so having someone who is confident I can lean on in social stuffs etc is always nice 11. How many people of the opposite sex do you fully trust? A lot, ngl most of my friends consider me their like "gay bestfriend". I even get invited to the girls night lmao. 13. What are you gonna do Saturday night? Sleep. 15. Are you going out with the last person you kissed? Yes 17. Who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything? couple of my pals, all of tumblr and my sister. 19. Have you had sex today? NO IM FUMING. 21. Are you in a good mood? yEAH IT'S SUNNY, BEEN OUT, EATING PIZZA 23. Are your eyes the same color as your dad’s? I actually do not know. 25. What would you say if the person you love/like kissed another girl/boy? Say it should've been me. 27. Would you be able to date someone who doesn’t make you laugh? Nah like, i have a v sarcastic sense of humour so I'd need it to be able to bounce back. 29. Do you really, truly miss someone right now? Nugget/Jasper 31. Honestly, do you hate the last boy you were talking to? Nah, they make work bearable. 33. Are you one of those people who never drinks soda?9/10 times im drinking it, it has alcohol in it. 35. Do you ever write in pencil anymore? Not really? 37. Do you believe in love at first sight? Uhm, I think you can be instantly attracted to someone and their "vibe" but LOVE idk man thats a tricky one. 39. Who was the last person you danced with? Honestly no idea. 41. When was the last time you ate a cupcake? uhmmmm. last week? 43. Ever embarrass yourself in front of a crush? Have u met me ofc. 45. If you could, would you take back your last kiss? Nah 47. Who was the last person to call you? Uhhh Emma I think 49. Do you dance in the car? How tf u meant to dance in a car 51. Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer? Don't think i ever had tbh 53. Is Christmas stressful? Yes. I work in retail 55. Favorite type of fruit pie? Oooo, cherry perhaps. 57. Do you believe in ghosts? Yeah I've seen some weird ass shit ngl 59. Take a vitamin daily? no 61. Wear a bath robe? Always naked. 63. First concert? blink-182 (ofc) Brixton 2014! 65. Nike or Adidas? Vans 67. Peanuts or Sunflower seeds? Uhhh nuts. 69. Ever take dance lessons? Nah 71. Can you curl your tongue? Oui 73. Have you ever cried because you were so happy? Ooof. probably? been a long time. 75. Do you study better with or without music? With 77. Ever been in love? Oui 79. What was the last concert you saw? Simple Plan in London 81. Tea or coffee? Neither because I'm weird. 83. Can you swim well? Uhhh if my life depends on it, probably not. 85. Are you patient? to an extent. 87. Ever won a contest? Don't think so no. 89. Which are better black or green olives? Both belong in the bin, I said what I said. 91. Best room for a fireplace? Living room/cosy room.
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blueskittlesart · 3 months
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someday when you're in college you may be registering for classes and see a 'TBD' next to the professor category on a class you're required to take. and you will hear a little voice in your head saying 'just take the class anyway, it can't be that bad. surely the school i'm putting myself in debt to go to wouldn't hire someone who doesn't know how to teach.' that voice is the devil. do not listen
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wall-e-gorl · 11 months
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Let me back it up to the start of the climb
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the-real-couchrat · 30 days
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Posting some mini art tutorials while I work on some bigger projects.
First we have Darceus Alamastern, created by @toothpastecanyon in Unto Dust
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And last (but not least) we have Nxlar the Antithetical, made by @gnomewithalaptop in Transcendence AU dash simulator and also appeared in The Comfort of Agony chapter 8
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vpofcookies · 3 months
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Me when I'm tired and sore after doing the same sport that makes me tired and sore every week:
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july-19th-club · 1 year
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i love insomnia AND congestion AND chills AND being on my period
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fleshdyke · 1 year
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oh fuck that was an awful experience
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moteldogs · 2 years
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on the one hand I'm the stubbornest person I know. on the other hand as soon as I'm in a relationship I have no idea what I want or how to say no or how to express anything I need
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caralara · 1 year
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.
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thecursivej · 2 years
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Obi-Wan Kenobi, Part V, Reactions
Alright motherfuckers, here are my reactions, lets get fucking going
OH MY GOD, THAT OPENING FLASHBACK MADE ME IMMEDIATELY CRY.
Oh shit was that VADER'S FLASHBACK!? OH FUCK!
NO LOLA NO!
Oh fuck that flashback again; we should not have let the Jedi become military soldiers, it completely fucked with Anakin's head and training.
OH HELL YEAH GENERAL KENOBI COMING OUT OF RETIREMENT TO MOTHERFUCKING LEAD
YES BABY LEIA YES! CLIMB THAT LADDER! LIVE YOUR DREAMS!
KUMAIL NANJIANI AGAIN!? HELL YEAH! HAJA IS ALIVE FUCKERS! (I really hope I don't jinx that)
Well shit, Bail is worried and fearful that Vader's made a discovery.
OH FUCK THE NEGOTIATOR IS COMING OUT TO PLAY NOW TOO!
Oh shit, we're getting Reva's background now. Hell yeah. Oh shit. Here we go.
Oh Reva, you may be a bitch, but you did not deserve to almost die because of Anakin switching sides.
OH GOD, NOT ANOTHER ORDER 66 FLASHBACK. FUCK ME GENTLY WITH A CHAINSAW.
"I thought he was there to help us." OW. OW. OW.
YOU WERE NOT WEAK REVA, YOU WERE A CHILD!
Oh sweet jesus this is so painful.
"Why didn't you stop him, why didn't you save us?!" Jesus Christ.
"Into the Breach!" Bitch this is like a poem.
Oh fuck who is gonna die?
Love that guy who grabbed a stormtrooper and just fucking yeeted him into a panel.
The compositions of John Williams once again making me sob like a little bitch.
TALA NO. TALA NO. TALA NOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!
Fuck me gently with a chainsaw I am not okay.
THE DROID COVERING HER TO PROTECT HER IS KILLING ME.
TALA IS A HERO AND I WILL SOB FOREVER OVER HER DEATH.
"May the force be with you." OH FUCK ME
"There's no way out, Master. Admit you're beaten."
OH FUCK ME.
YOU CAN'T QUIT, BEN! DO NOT LET LEIA ALONE DAMN YOU.
JESUS CHRIST HERE WE GO.
OH FUCK ME.
God I love the look of defiance on Ben's face is so good.
OH SHIT ARE WE GETTING A TEAM UP WITH REVA AND BEN?!
OH please. Reva. PLEASE.
OH FUCK. BEN YOU SNEAKY DOG I LOVE YOU. C'MON REVA. TAKE THE DEAL BITCH.
These flashbacks are just making me dissolve into tears. I miss old Anakin and Obi-Wan.
"Your need for victory, Anakin, it blinds you." OH FUCK HERE WE GO.
YAY LOLA IS OKAY AGAIN!!!!
OH fuck Vader really fell for that shit.
Lola helping us repair shit is the best thing ever. I love this.
OH HELL YEAH, HERE WE FUCKING GO. GET ON THE FUCKING SHIP RIGHT THE FUCK NOW.
FUCK THE CONTACT THING TO TALK TO BAIL. SHIT.
How is Bail gonna know his kid is okay?
OH FUCK HERE COMES VADER.
FUCK ME.
OH SHIT, HE STOPPED THE DAMN SHIP WITH HIS HAND.
Oh, Anakin; my heart. My poor baby Anakin. OH ANAKIN.
FUCK ME GENTLY WITH A CHAINSAW I AM NOT OKAY.
REVA IS ABOUT TO DIE. fuck. Here we go. Reva, you are exactly like Anakin, and he's just playing you like a goddamn drum.
OH FUCK WE DUELING. WE DUELING. REVA C'MON GIRL. I NEED YOU TO BE SMARTER. Oh no she gonna die.
Does he recognize her? OH, HE DOES. OH, SHE'S HAVING FLASHBACKS. OH, HERE WE GO. OH FUCK. SHE'S DEAD. Rip. OH, HE KNEW. HE FUCKING KNEW.
HOW DID THE GRAND INQUISITOR SURVIVE!? Oh fuck. I really want her to survive. C'mon, Reva. Revenge does much to keep someone alive, so stay alive.
We're all on the transport, hallelujah.
FUCK NO GODDAMN IT. C'MON REVA. YOU ARE A FORCE USER. YOU ARE POWERFUL.
Obi-Wan is gonna lose his shit. OH FUCK REVA KNOWS ABOUT LUKE. OH FUCK ME GENTLY WITH A CHAINSAW.
HERE WE GO AGAIN. GODDAMN IT, FUCK. REVA IS GONNA TELL VADER. FUCK ME. OH SHIT. OH SHIT.
OH SHIT. FUCK ME. OH SHIT. I am screaming. This isn't good.
OH BABY LUKE, YOU SWEET SUMMER CHILD.
BITCH THAT'S WHERE WE END!?!?!
I am not okay. Vader's behind them, Reva knows and is probs gonna go after Luke for revenge, Bail just wants his daughter back, and Luke is just a sweet summer child sleeping peacefully and probs dreaming about being the next greatest pilot alive.
FUCK.
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worldwright · 3 days
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just one day when I can get home on time would be great
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naughtydogg · 7 months
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sigh I wish people would think before they said certain things to me
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chososdiscordkitten · 2 months
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Begging For Attention.
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Synopsis: Trying to focus on a work assignment thats due tonight, only Satoru needs your attention.
Pairing: Gojo x Fem!Reader Content: Some plot, established relationship, gojo being too pretty, masturbation, exhibitionism (?), voyeurism (?), cock warming, doggy, a very light sprinkle of manhandling like barely there, cream pie
Dedicated to: this ask, ily🕷️ anon.
MDNI
Satoru always found it rather tedious whenever you’d ‘purposefully’ start working in his presence. Knowing his time was limited as it was- and here you were, typing voraciously in the apartment office. 
“Do you need something Satoru?” you sighed, not even bothering to look up from the various pieces of paper in front of you. Being able to feel his gaze on you as you tried working.
Satoru held his hand on the doorknob, dramatically exhaling, “Just miss you s’all.” he mumbled, swinging the door back and forth as you flipped through the various pages, trying to find a specific sentence you had read a few days ago. 
You scoffed, placing the various pages onto the desk and typing on the computer again. Satoru kept swinging the door back and forth, a small squeak coming from the hinges every time he moved it. All but telling you to look at him, just look at him and he’ll leave you alone. 
Squeak, squeak, squeak-
You exasperated, looking up from the computer with pursed lips, “Satoru.” you called through clenched teeth. 
“I said I miss you.” 
“I heard you.” you mumbled looking back down to the papers as he exhaled, trying to think of ways to pull your attention from your work. 
Satoru smiled, a seemingly smart idea popping into his head as he pulled the door closed- leaving it a smidge open, knowing you'd notice. Hoping you'd call him back just to close the door. But you didn’t- you sighed and kept your eyes on the screen. 
It wasn't long till Satoru was back at the door frame, your favorite mug in hand. You flashed your eyes up, noticing he was missing a shirt and was wearing his plaid pj pants very, very low on his hips. “Thirsty?” he asked sweetly, holding the mug in his hand as you scowled. 
And Jesus, did he fucking look good. His carved torso looked like he just glazed a light layer of baby oil on the ridges, the light happy trail that was all too visible from how low the band of his pj’s were. 
You gulped lightly, “If you're trying to tempt me it won’t work ‘toru.” reaching your hand out to the coffee cup and watching the smirk on his face broaden, as though your declaration was a useless attempt at a lie. 
You took the cup from his hand, making sure to keep your eyes on his face. Just to be sure he wouldn’t tempt you. 
Gojo smiled, leaning down and pressing a kiss to the top of your head before leaning down to your ear, “I'll be in bed if you need me.” he mumbled in an alluring tone. Far too close- his lips practically brushing against the shell of your ear. 
You shook your shoulders in a shudder- hearing him huff a smile before leaving the room. 
It pained you knowing his attempts were somewhat working. Finding yourself skimming the pages and not processing anything that you read. Every blink you took, a half-naked Satoru flashed in your mind. 
You sighed, not being able to focus on the document that was due tonight. Blinking your eyes back to the cracked door Gojo left open purposefully. Toying with the idea of abandoning the document that was a quarter away from being done.
You shook off the thought, picking up a pen and staring back down at the stack of meaningless pages. An unknown amount of time that felt like hours passed, still trying to focus on the black ink. 
That was till you heard a loud exaggerated moan seep into the room from the little crack of the door. You furrowed your eyebrows, trying to think if you were imagining it or not.
That was till you heard another- this time your name practically shouted from the bedroom as your eyes widened. 
Muffles of ‘-feeelllsss sooo goood,’ in a pornographic voice spill into the room. Your cheeks tingle realizing this was just another scheme to pull you from your work. You sighed, standing up from the rolling chair and slamming the door shut. Loud enough for Satoru to hear. 
Gojo was so loud, that even with the door closed, you could hear your name sprinkled between his ear-splitting whines. The bad part was, you didn't know if he was just pretending or if he was actually jacking off. Even worse was how curious you were to see if he was. 
Instead of caving- or keeping up this act of you not being tempted by him, you thought up a way to find out if he was doing what you thought he was doing. 
You stood up from the chair, opening the door of the office, and immediately hearing the moans coming from the opened door of your bedroom. Nodding your head disapprovingly as you stepped to the doorframe. Looking into the bedroom and seeing that he was indeed- stroking himself on full display. 
With an inhale you stepped into the room, avoiding eye contact and walking to your work bag. “You don't- hah,” Satoru tried saying, stroking himself as you crouched to the ground, pulling out a folder and looking through stray pages. “You don't knock anymore?” he huffed, pressing his head back onto the headboard as you sighed.
You scoffed, “This is my room too, ‘toru.” going through the pages before standing. Looking at him with feigned annoyance, watching as he started smiling. His eyebrows furrowed, dramatizing more whimpers as he reached his free hand out to the empty side of the bed. 
Gojo huffed a smile, continuing to stroke himself lazily. His previous orgasm coating his tummy proved to you- he was dedicated to luring you away from your work. 
“You look stressed-” he whined with a veiled cunning tone, “Join me~” patting your side of the bed softly. Satoru’s tone grew more and more breathless the more you stared at him, as though he was getting off on being watched. 
You gave a warm smile, holding the folder of papers you pretended to look for in your hand. “You look like you're doin’ just fine on your own.” you tilted your head sweetly, watching his expression fall along with the pace his wrist kept. 
Taking a step towards the door, “Try and keep it down, kay?” you spoke sweetly, practically being able to see the pout form on his lips as you stepped out of the room. Walking back to the office with a tingle roaming on your cheeks, knowing he did all that just to tempt you.
One thing about Satoru was, you could always count on him to make you feel desired. If you were trying to focus on your work- he still made you know that he wanted you- even if you were ignoring him. 
As you settled back into the office chair- you knew that thinking about trying to complete your work was futile. Pretty much being able to hear the cogs in Gojo’s brain churn a few feet away. 
It wasn't long before the office door opened, a head full of lily-white hair peeking through the cracked door with a meek smile. A small giggle left his throat as he fully stepped in, noticing he had the courtesy of wiping off his previous mess from his tummy. 
Satoru’s cock in full view- uncaring if it was throbbing from how worked up he got from knowing you were watching him.
You inhaled, “Satoru..” muttered through clenched teeth, watching him ease himself into the chair in front of your desk. His cheeks blushed and a light sheen of sweat on his chest. You furrowed your eyebrows, all but asking him what he was doing. 
“This is my office too~” he sassed, watching your eyes flash back and forth from his flushed face down to your computer. Gojo lightly placed his hand back onto his shaft, “You're always sooo mean to me-” he inhaled, stroking himself as you tried your very best to keep your eyes on your computer. 
Pinching his eyebrows while lightly pumping himself, sighing a small moan as he melted into the chair. “You're dirtying my chair.” You mumbled, pretending to type on your computer. 
Satoru let out a pleased half-laugh, thralling his head back and letting out a small moan. “And I'm not- mean to you.” You scoffed, being able to hear the vulgar squelches from his hand. 
He exhaled with a light, ‘hah’ biting his lip and jerking himself harsher- “Keep talking-” he grinned with a whimper, “I'm almost-” he inhaled, his chest rising and falling as you scoffed, “M’almost t-there.” 
“You’re so nasty ‘toru.” you mumbled, playing into his game and peeking your eyes past the top of your computer, being able to see the very tip of his leaky flushed cock. 
Gojo whined a delirious breath, being able to feel your eyes on his skin. He hissed through clenched teeth, “I like when you talk to me like that~” 
Though the moans from earlier were all too dramatized and blatantly fake- the ones he was huffing out now were straight from his lungs, unable to filter them as you nodded your head unamused. 
Satoru was grunting- showing you he was so fucking close. His wrist shook as he tried to avoid his tip. You could see his chest rising and falling more often, fully expecting him to spill his seed on the floor of your office. Only he pulled his hand away at the very last millisecond, whining desperately as though you were the one edging him. 
With a sigh, you looked up from your computer and pursed your lips, knowing he would keep this up till you addressed him. Watching the corners of his mouth curl into an appeased smile, knowing you were close to caving. “What’s your goal here, ‘toru.” you crossed your arms on the desk. His eyes sparkling at your question, being able to see the shine circle his pupil. 
A sweet giggle leaves Gojo’s throat knowing you've buckled. “I just wanna feel you~” He pouted. Watching your lip tug up with a scoff. 
“You're insufferable.” you laughed, standing up from your chair and watching his face light up. 
It was true, the minute he walked in, mug in hand and looking fucking scrumptious- you had discarded this useless idea of working.
The second he whispered that little comment in your ear;
“If you need me-” 
Denying him the attention he was so clearly asking for became foreplay. From the second he walked out of the office, you knew it, Gojo knew it. Why keep playing this little charade? 
You quirked your head- guiding him to sit in your chair as you hooked your fingers onto the sides of your bottoms. Watching Satoru settle into your chair, “I’m gonna finish this. You stay still till I do.” stepping out of your spoiled panties and watching his eyes light up with excitement. Nodding his head up and down as though he knew what you meant. 
Satoru sat impatiently in your chair, waiting for you to step between his knees. 
And as you planted your hands on the wooden desk top, Satoru placed one palm on your hip as he held the base of his dribbling cock with the other- awaiting you to sink onto him. 
Gojo helped your entrance align with his cockhead, a gasp falling from his lips as he felt your soaked cunt take him in with ease. “You got this wet from jus’ watching’ me?” he huffed, hearing soft whimpers fall from your lips as his length stretched you with a light sting.
“God ‘toru- shut up.” You hissed, feeling his tip brush against your sweet spot in passing. Coaxing a shuddering exhale to leave your lips, Satoru grunted when he felt his cock fully rest inside of you- so ready to feel you drag yourself up from his lap. 
Only you didn't. You stayed still and tried getting used to the feeling of his tip twitching inside of you.
With a light sigh, you placed your hands back onto the keyboard, rereading the last sentence you wrote before hesitating to start typing. Satoru scoffed, pressing his chin on your shoulder as his hands held onto the malleable skin of your hips. 
“You're not gonna move baby?” he mumbled, huffing a warm breath against your ear as you scoffed. 
Satoru shifted his hips beneath you, causing his cock to nudge against your walls. A quiet moan fell from your lips at the movement, “I told you- stay still until I finish this.” you sighed, trying to finish the sloppy sentence on the screen.
He grunted into your ear, frustrated that this was all he would get till you were finished. “You said you wanted to feel-” he shifted his hips again, pushing your hips down onto his cock. Causing you to let out a small moan. “Satoru!” you scolded, being able to feel his cheeks rise against your neck in a smile at your reprimand. 
“Okay, okay. I'll behave.” he shuddered, holding your hips with a mean grip as you started typing again. 
And Satoru tried, he really did. But with every single little shift of your hips and every hiss of ‘Stop moving.’ Gojo got more, and more impatient. 
So to tempt you- yet again. Satoru dipped his hand between your thighs, being able to hear your typing halt and your shoulders tense against his chin. You were about to scold him- but he pressed his fingertips onto your neglected clit softly, a sigh leaving your lips in response with a wave of goosebumps rising on your arms. “Toru-” you gasped, feeling his fingers lazily circle your clit. 
“Lemme make you feel good~” he hummed into your ear, being able to feel your cunt clench around his cock in tandem with every little circle he made. 
You inhaled, easing your hands off of the keys and closing your eyes. Dissolving in his hands, the one on your hip guiding you to raise yourself a little, sighing as you slowly rose off of his lap. 
His fingers made firmer circles on your clit as his hand led you to sink back down onto his cock. And then back up again with small whimpers leaving your lips. Bracing your hands on the edge of the desk as you lazily bounced on his cock. 
Gojo inhaled with a small entertained laugh, watching you struggle to keep a set pace, “So much for your little docu-” you clenched your walls at his teasing remark causing him to let out a moan mixed with a hiss. 
Satoru only offered quiet exhales and frustrated whimpers at your attempts. Being shoved into the chair with every agonizingly slow bounce you sank onto his cock. Gojo tapped your hip lightly, all but saying to hang on for a second.
You held yourself on the very tip of his cock, the muscles of your walls pulsing against his cockhead. Satoru slightly raised himself from the chair, sliding his cock back into you. His hand guided your hip to bend over the desk, feeling his hips press against the curve of your ass as he bent with you. 
Keeping his pace steady on your clit as he ground his hips against you, “f-faster ‘toru-” you moaned as he pressed his forehead onto your nape trying to focus on not cumming already.
Though he denied your request, he quickened the pace of his fingers on your clit. 
Gojo let out a small whimper, “I go any faster and I'll c-cum-” he whined, being able to feel you getting closer and closer with every twitch and tremble your cunt reverberated onto his cock. 
It wasn't long before you started warning you were close, his slow strokes barely nudging against that sweet spot making your head fuzzy. So close to an orgasm- you could taste it. And Satoru could feel it pulse against his shaft. 
Gojo placed the hand on your hip atop yours that was splayed on the wooden top. Whining against your ear as you clenched around him. And that's when Satoru pulled his hips from you, taking a split second to breathe before snapping his hips back into you with a low grunt. Dragging out his cock in a hurry- thrusting back into you and syncing the roll of his hips with the unpatterned movements against your clit. Writhing back into him as his hips drilled into you, Satoru’s breathless whines brushed against your ear, feeling your walls flutter around his shaft. 
“Cum inside ‘toru-” you huffed in a breathy moan, feeling his chest press against your back, keeping a relentless pace with his hips. Satoru let out a loud whimper at your words- his fingers stuttering their circles against you. 
A fussy breath left his throat as he tried to speak, “m’cumm- im cu-” Gojo tried warning, his eyes squeezed tight and his eyebrows pinched together. Though you couldn't see it, his cheeks were flushed with a rosy pink. A light glaze on his forehead from his efforts of trying not to cum. 
Finally unloading himself into you- dense spurts of his seed coating your walls. A low moan fell from your lips at feeling his hand slow against your clit. Incoherent curses littered with whimpers between them were breathed into your ear as he slowed his hips. His seed dared to spill out with every little thrust he took. 
Satoru’s pelvis wanted to keep thrusting- wanting to try and ride down from the edged orgasm you milked from him. But in his mind, he needed to get back at you for your earlier denials. 
Huffing heavy breaths against the shell of your ear as his hips steadied, keeping his cock nuzzled deep inside of you- fearing the tiniest movement would cause your cunt to start spilling his hard-earned cum. And that? Satoru was not ready for. 
So as an effort to keep as much of his thick seed inside of you, he placed his hand back onto your hip. Making sure to keep your cunt still as he eased both of you back onto the chair, your body malleable to his manhandling. 
Your thighs spasm lightly as you come down from your orgasm. Feet daring to stumble as he eased down into the chair, holding your hip with his messied hand and the other making sure you didn't move on his lap. 
It took a second to realize what Satoru was doing- blinking a few times before realizing he reached his hand to your keyboard, pulling it closer to you with an obvious smile. His breath still tickling your ear as he puffed an amused grin, “Let's just go to the bedroom ‘toru-” you whined, hoping he still had enough in him to keep going. 
But the small laugh that was wisped against your ear made you realize that not only- did he have more than enough in him to keep going. But you knew he was just stubborn and cruel enough to do this to you. 
His cock refused to soften inside of you, being able to feel his overstimulated cockhead twitch inside your stuffed cunt. Gojo pressed his flushed lips to your ear in a lazy peck, “You said this was due tonight~” he murmured into your ear as he held your hip still with one hand.
“Finish it and then we can play.” He giggled against your ear causing you to shiver in his grasp. 
Even if Satoru was the one who was begging for your attention at first- he always made sure you were the one asking for more once he received it.
-
I almost forgot to post this -.-
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scuderiahoney · 4 months
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Tangerine
Oscar Piastri x reader
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Masterlist // Part 1 // Part 1.5 // Part 2
Summary: You’re definitely not an insomniac. But Oscar keeps finding you awake at all hours, and he’s starting to get worried. Or: I wrote this while actually being unable to sleep, passed out for 3 hours, woke up and finished it. So… here you go, I guess?
Word Count: 6.8k
Warnings: insomnia, anxiety/mild paranoia?, alcohol, limited knowledge of the actual structure of the MTC and the corporate structure of McLaren in general, a poorly researched night in Tokyo
The MTC lobby is empty, besides you. The lights are half turned off, motion sensors that have gone hours without detecting anything. You’ve stuck to your table in the corner. It’s quiet, just how you like it.
You look up from your notebook after who knows how long, blinking your weary eyes. Outside, the floodlights reflect off the inky black lake. There’s a car, pulling up in the drop off area outside the front doors. It’s Oscar, you think, his car one of a few that are easily recognizable. Sure enough, it’s confirmed when he climbs out of the driver’s side door. He leaves it running as he makes his way up to the door.
Oscar scans his pass and the doors swing open, followed by all of the lights in the lobby flickering on. You squint, fighting the urge to shield your eyes from the harsh lighting. Oscar is rushing through the lobby, a man on a mission, but he skids to a stop about halfway across the shiny tiled floor.
He turns, slowly, and makes eye contact with you. “Jesus, you scared the shit out of me.”
You hold back a laugh, thinking that might be a little mean, all things considered. “What are you doing here?”
He sighs, hands hanging at his sides. “I forgot my phone charger, and my laptop, and…” he pauses, frowning at you. “What are you doing here?”
You raise your brows right back. “Working?”
You watch his eyes flicker across your setup. You’re still in the same McLaren sweatshirt you’d been wearing when you saw him that morning. Your hair is piled atop your head. Your laptop sits open in front of you, the only source of light before Oscar burst through the doors. There are papers and notebooks scattered on the tabletop. Your pen is missing- you selfishly hope that as he scours your table, he’ll spot it.
“You got here at 8am,” he says, bewildered. “It’s almost midnight. That’s almost 16 hours.”
He says nothing about the pen. Why would he? He doesn’t know it’s missing. Logically, it must be here somewhere, probably under a paper or clipped to a notebook, but you’ve given up.
“Yes,” you answer, smirking. “You’re great at math, Oscar.”
He rolls his eyes. “Shouldn’t you be, I don’t know, home? Sleeping?”
You shrug. “I took breaks. It’s not like I’ve been working all day straight.”
You’re not lying. You’d taken a good, long lunch break, and an afternoon walk around the grounds. You’ve gotten up to stretch a couple times, made runs to the break room for coffee. You hope he doesn’t see straight through it, though. Hope he can’t see the dark circles under your eyes, the paleness of your skin, the exhaustion weighing your shoulders.
It’s not that you weren’t tired. You just knew you wouldn’t be able to sleep. One of those days. So instead, you had decided to be productive. Which had led to this- you in the lobby of your office building, hunched over a laptop. Oscar, the driver whose data you’re scouring, staring at you with wide eyes.
“Go grab your stuff,” you tell him, nodding towards the doors he’d been headed to. “You have an early flight tomorrow.”
He blinks wildly. “We’re on the same flight.”
You nod, because you both know this quite well. There’d been a meeting this morning about who had to be where and at what times. You’re on the first flight out with the main team, headed to Singapore.
“I’m not the one who has to drive the car at very high speeds this weekend,” you remind him, pointing the eraser of your pencil at him. “Or the one who has to be in front of the cameras. You need your beauty sleep.”
Oscar laughs at that, a happy sound that makes you smile, too. “Okay, okay. I’ll be right back.”
You think about disappearing to the bathroom or the break room while he’s gone, just to avoid any further questions. You know Oscar relatively well, though, and knowing him, he’d just wait around until you came back. Or worse, come and try to find you. You can picture it- you pouring your third cup of coffee in the last hour, Oscar watching from the doorway with disdain. You stay put, sipping from your mug and scribbling notes.
He’s back within a few minutes, a backpack in hand. His keys dangle from his fingertips. You don’t look up from your laptop as he walks towards you, that is until he’s standing right in front of you. You blink up at him through your lashes. There’s a frown on his face- this close, you know your lack of sleep must be obvious.
He nudges the top panel of your laptop with a single fingertip. “C’mon. Time to go home.”
“I’m fine,” you tell him, shaking your head. “I’ll see you tomorrow, bright and early.”
“What, you just gonna stay here until we all meet up in the morning to go to the airport?” He scoffs.
“That would be ridiculous,” you laugh.
“It would,” he agrees. He seems to see straight through you, though. “Come on. Close the laptop, close the notebooks. You can work on this on the flight, like a normal person.”
“I’m trying to improve your car, you know.”
“I’m not leaving until you do,” he finally says, and you scoff with wide eyes. “And remember, I’m the one who has to actually drive the car. And go in front of the cameras. I need my beauty sleep.”
You rear your head back, unsure how to even counter that. He takes the opportunity to close the laptop for you, and you bat at his hands. Then he’s sweeping your papers into piles, stacking your notebooks and gathering them up into his arms.
“That’s my intellectual property, you know,” you scold him, reaching for the papers. He holds them up above your head easily, and you groan. “Okay, okay, I’ll go, just- I lost my pen, earlier. It’s my favorite one. I just have find it and then I promise I’ll go- you can go home, really, I’ll see you-“
He’s reaching for your head, suddenly, and you freeze. When his hand returns to your view, he’d holding the pen between his fingertips. You blink once, twice, then reach for it, but he’s holding it above your head within seconds, too.
“We’re leaving,” he tells you, firmly. “Come on. Up we go.”
You get to your feet reluctantly and pack your things into your bag. Oscar helps, handing you your papers in neat little piles. He keeps you in front of him as you both exit the lobby, like he’s afraid you might take off running further into the office building. His car is still parked out front, still running, and you see him wince.
“Didn’t expect to be inside for so long,” he says sheepishly.
You laugh lightly, starting your walk towards the employee lot. It’s down a well lit path, but every step feels heavy this late at night.
“Wait,” he says, and you pause. “Do you want a ride? You seem tired. You know, sometimes that’s as bad as driving drunk.”
“I’m not gonna fall asleep behind the wheel,” you tell him. You say it with confidence, because it’s pretty likely you’re not going to fall asleep at all tonight.
He cocks his head at you, cast in the bright glow of the floodlights. “At least let me drive you to your car. Otherwise, how do I know you’re not going to just go back inside?”
You roll your eyes. “And how do I know you’re not trying to kidnap me?”
You end up getting in the car, because he makes it pretty clear he’s not leaving until you do. You contemplate just walking to your own car, but honestly your feet feel so heavy it’s just not worth the fight. Oscar, to his credit, doesn’t kidnap you. He also doesn’t comment on your very modest car, the only one left in the parking lot. He does try to offer you a ride home one more time, but he lets it go after your repeat refusal.
You say goodbye, climb into your own car, and start the engine. The heat kicks on quickly, thank god, and you start up a playlist. It’s only when you look up, ready to leave, that you notice his car is still sitting there. You can just barely see Oscar behind the windshield, and he waves at you. He’s waiting for you to leave.
You flip him off as you roll out of the parking lot, and you watch him laugh in response.
…..
You’re one of the first ones at the office the next morning, and therefore one of the first ones on a shuttle to the airport. Oscar’s chronically late, or as he would call it, chronically precisely on time, so you don’t see him until he’s climbing on the plane. McLaren’s rented out a charter plane for this trip, with the double header making it the easiest solution.
You’re already settled into a seat, laptop open on the table in front of you, headphones on. You barely even look up when you feel him looking over you, but then he’s tugging one side of your headphones off your ear.
“Did you even sleep?” He asks, brows furrowed.
“Yes,” you lie, raising your brows at him defensively.
Oscar raises his brows in return. He obviously doesn’t believe you.
Before he can say anything else, Lando’s behind him, leaning up over his shoulder. “Oscar, mate, get a move on.”
Oscar rolls his eyes but does as Lando’s urging. There’s not assigned seats, per say, but the two drivers are headed towards the middle of the plane where their trainers and other senior staff are sitting. That’s how these things normally go- it just makes sense. They’ll have meetings on the plane, talk about meal plans and strategies and get ready for the weekend. You’ll spend your flight going through the data just one more time, trying to unlock all of the secrets to give Oscar the best possible chance on Sunday.
…..
Singapore is good. Not great, not perfect, but good. For Lando’s team, it’s a huge weekend. And honestly, 4th place for Oscar in his rookie year is huge too. He’s thrilled, tells you as much after the race, after the briefing.
“I know you worked hard this weekend, put in a lot of hours,” he says. “Thank you.”
“Just doing my job,” you say with a shrug.
“Right.” He says. “Thanks, though.”
You smile up at him, knowing it’s wobbly and insincere. You don’t take compliments well. “No problem.”
When you get to the hotel that night, you lay down in the bed and try to fall asleep. It’s no use, really, because it’s not your bed, and because your mind is racing. There’s nothing even bothering you, that’s the stupid thing. Just… a billion thoughts flying by all at once. So you wander the hotel, up and down the stairs, down the halls. You make a pit stop in the exercise room, walk on the treadmill, try out the rowing machine. You’ve never been one for working out, but the internet says exercise can help with sleep issues. It’s worth a try, but it doesn’t work.
You contemplate sneaking into the closed hotel pool, but ultimately decide against it. You’d probably get caught, and then you’d get in trouble, and it would somehow make it back to your boss. Then you’d get fired in Singapore, left to find your own way home. So instead, you head for the vending machines on your floor. There’s got to be something in there that’ll cure the racing in your head. Or at least bring you some comfort in the dead of night.
What doesn’t bring you comfort in the dead of night is a face in the reflection on the glass of the vending machine. You nearly scream when you meet someone else’s eyes. You whirl around, arms in a defensive position, and come face to face with Oscar.
“Would’ve pegged you for flight, not fight,” he says drowsily.
“You can’t sneak up on people like that,” you hiss, dropping your hands to your sides.
“Payback,” he mutters, dragging a hand down his face clumsily. “B‘sides, I wasn’t trying to sneak up on you. I was trying to get a snack.”
You blink at him. “Oscar, it’s 3am.”
He nods, blinks slowly. You almost expect his eyes to stay closed, almost expect him to fall asleep standing up.
“I woke up starving,” he says, shuffling towards one of the vending machines. “Promise you won’t tell Kim? I’ll buy you whatever you want.”
He’s cute when he’s sleepy. You want to tuck him into bed and tell him bedtime stories. You want to kiss his forehead. You blink hard, trying to reset your brain. The sleep deprivation is really getting to you. This is your coworker, your teammate.
You shrug and nod in agreement. “Would’ve kept the secret without the bribe, but if you’re offering…”
Oscar laughs, a quiet sound in the empty night air. “What’ll it be, then?”
He’s leaning against the glass heavily. He must still be half asleep. You can’t blame him. You point at the bag of chips you’d been eyeing, and then at the gummy worms in the corner. He nods in approval of both, selects them, feeds the machine his money. Then he’s picking his own snack- a poptart and a bag of Cheetos. He backs away, but you make a noise and point at the drinks machine.
“And a Red Bull?” You ask, pointing at your favorite flavor where it sits, lit up by fluorescent light.
He turns back, almost puts the money in, and then he pauses and looks at you. “It’s 3am.”
“Right, we established that.”
“Why would you drink Red Bull at 3am?” He asks, bewildered.
You shrug. “Because I like Red Bull.”
“Go work for them, then,” he suggests. You laugh. “Actually, I have a feeling that would be severely detrimental to your health. Too many free energy drinks. Do you ever sleep?”
“Those are big words for 3am,” you tease, nudging his shoulder. “Come on. The tangerine one, please.”
“I’m not buying you a Red Bull.” He shakes his head. “I am walking you back to your room and you’re going to bed.”
“I’ll tell Kim about your snacks.”
“No, you won’t.”
You let him walk you back to your room. He stands there as you swipe the key card, as you open the door and shuffle inside. He says goodnight from the doorway. You close the door after you echo the sentiment, lock all the locks, and lay down in your bed. You close your eyes and try to go to sleep. You really, truly try. But when the clock turns over to 4am, and you realize it’s useless, you roll out of bed and head down to the vending machine. You buy the Redbull with your own money, carry it back to your room, turn on the tv, and settle in until the sun comes up.
…..
Tokyo may just be your favorite city in the entire world. Everything is open all the time. You’ve never felt more seen by a city. The days that you and the rest of the team spend there between the two races are heaven. You have meetings during the day, but they’re short and easy. At night, there are plenty of places for you to roam, plenty of things to do and see.
You spend your nights in ramen bars, in arcades, in toy stores that seem to stretch on for miles. You collect so many souvenirs you’re worried you’ll have to buy a second suitcase. Frankly, you’re going on week two of sleeping only in one to two hour stints, and it’s likely you’re beginning to get a little manic. In Tokyo, though, nobody bats an eye.
You join the team for breakfast in the hotel lobby on Thursday. You’ve somehow ended up at a table with Oscar and Lando- you’d gotten here before anyone else, and Oscar had chosen the seat across from you. Lando asks what you’ve been up to. They’ve been busy with promo stuff, you’ve hardly seen the two of them all week.
You regale them with your stories and hand off your phone to Lando so he can scroll through your pictures. Oscar listens with rapt attention, leaning to look at the photos too.
“How do you do all this and find time to sleep?” Lando asks, an amused tone in his voice.
“She doesn’t, mate,” Oscar replies, pointing at your phone. “Look at the time stamps.”
You roll your eyes and snatch the phone away from them. Lando’s looking at you with wide eyes, Oscar is smiling amusedly.
“Sleep is for the weak,” you tell them, and you swear Lando’s eyes are going to bug out of his head. “We’re in Tokyo, I’m making the most of it.”
To Oscar’s credit, he doesn’t bring up the encounter at the MTC, or the run in at the vending machines. Still, this revelation seems to bewilder Lando.
“Sleep is like, the most important thing,” he says, shaking his head. “For your health.”
“Not all of us have to be in tip top shape,” you say, stabbing your fork into a waffle on your plate. “Some of us get to have fun. Exhibit B. Our breakfasts.”
Lando looks at your plate, filled with waffles and bacon and your cup of coffee, next to it. He casts his glance to his sad looking bowl of oatmeal, then, and sighs heavily. Oscar’s laughing at the two of you, though his plate looks just as sad.
“When you pass out halfway through the day,” Lando says, a retaliatory furrow in his brow, “I’m telling Andrea why.”
“That won’t happen,” you reassure him. “And besides, it’s media day. I have it easy.”
…..
Oscar makes it on the podium on Sunday. You scream your lungs out with the rest of the team, run to the pit wall, watch the podium celebrations. He’s wrapping everyone in enthusiastic hugs, slapping everyone’s backs and grinning so, so widely. All the lost sleep feels worth it, just to see him smile like that.
When he makes it to you, he hauls you into his chest, arms around your shoulders, holding you tight. You could stay like that forever, if he’d let you. He tucks his chin atop your head and you think you’d like to make a home right there, in his arms.
The celebrations go late, and so does the debrief. By the time it’s all said and done, everyone looks exhausted, including the drivers. They start shuttling you all back to the hotel for the night, back in Tokyo so you can get on the plane easily tomorrow morning. You’re just glad to be back in the city. On a night like tonight, buzzing with adrenaline and caffeine, there’s no way you’re falling asleep.
You somehow end up in a shuttle with Oscar. He smells like champagne and sweat, and you tease him about it when he sits down in the back row next to you.
He smiled sheepishly. “So I smell like a podium finisher, then.”
You watch as the city goes by out the window and listen to him chat idly with the others in the van. When you get back, you’re the last one out of the car. He’s waiting outside the hotel, leaning on the wall.
“So, what’s your plan for the night?” He asks, cocking a brow.
“No judgement?” You ask.
“No judgement,” he promises.
You shrug. “Not exactly sure. There’s a lot to do. I’ll probably get some ramen, maybe go shopping. Might just take a walk.”
He nods. “Sleep?”
“Not high on the priority list,” you admit.
He nods again. “Can I come with?”
You blank, staring at him. “What?”
“On your adventure,” he asks, crossing his arms over his chest. “Can I come along?”
Suddenly your heart is pounding in your chest. He wants to come with? Why? There’s a part of you that doesn’t like the idea, that thinks your sleepless adventures are for you and you alone. The other part of you, the one that wins out, thinks it might not be so bad to have some companionship.
“… sure,” you agree, eyeing him carefully. “But you have to play along. No forcing me to go to sleep.”
“Promise,” he says, holding out his pinky.
You hook yours with his and seal the deal.
…..
You both head up to your hotel rooms to change clothes, and in Oscar’s case, to take a shower. He sends you a text when he’s ready and you meet him in the lobby. He’s in a casual outfit, jeans and a hoodie. You’re dressed similarly, in a pair of black jeans and a crewneck.
“Where to?” He asks, wide grin on his face.
It turns out that Oscar is the ideal late night adventure companion. You start your night out at a sushi conveyor restaurant, both of you joking about how Lando would never dare to eat there. You eat to your heart’s content and make comments about fueling up for the night ahead. He even joins you in having an energy drink, some Japanese brand that you’ve never heard of. Oscar reads part of the label to you, balks at the amount of caffeine in it, and drinks it anyways.
After the restaurant, the two of you climb into a cab and head to the Shibuya district. It’s crawling with people, buzzing with energy, and you feel right at home. Oscar sticks close to your side, hanging onto the back of your sweatshirt as you cross the busy crosswalks in a sea of people. When you turn, though, he’s smiling like he’s having the time of his life. The two of you climb the stairs to an observatory where you can watch the dance of pedestrians and traffic from above. There’s a glow to the city that feels akin to how your brain feels when you can’t sleep- like it never goes out, never turns off.
You tell this to Oscar, who gives you a contemplative look.
“Is it the energy drinks?” He asks. His hand is on your wrist, likely just to keep track of you in the crowds.
You shake your head. “The energy drinks came after the… not sleeping-“
“Insomnia,” he suggests.
“… not sleeping,” you repeat, narrowing your eyes at him. “Anyways. I was like a zombie. The energy drinks make it so I’m functional. I figure if I’m gonna be awake, may as well enjoy it.”
You head back out onto the streets and begin to wander again. Oscar follows along, always holding onto you in some way, always smiling when you look at him. The two of you wander through art galleries and museums lit up with neon lights. Somewhere in the middle of one of them, he slips his fingers between yours. You’re not complaining. There’s something grounding, leveling about his presence.
You stop for drinks at a bar- some sort of local beer that Oscar orders for both of you in Japanese. It’s followed by a vodka Red Bull, at your insistence. Oscar wrinkles his nose but drinks the whole thing, seemingly determined to match you.
Next door, there’s a highly American themed bowling alley. Oscar laughs about how Logan would love it and pulls you inside. It’s the first stop of the night that he’s suggested, so you go along eagerly. He’s snapping pictures, ones to send to Logan, ones for himself, ones of you smiling, renting out bowling shoes. He pays for the game, and you both do terribly. The worker puts the bumper guards up out of pity, because the two of you obviously have no idea what you’re doing. He’s a world renowned athlete, you’re a highly skilled engineer, and yet, you both suck at bowling.
“When did the in-“ you fix him with a glare, and he stops mid sentence. “When did the not sleeping start?”
You look up at the ceiling of the bowling alley and purse your lips, watching the disco ball spin. “Next question.”
He huffs and shrugs, rolling the ball down the lane. “I don’t have a next question.”
“What’s your family like?”’you ask him, and he smiles, softer than you’ve ever seen him smile before.
“Well, I have three sisters,” he starts, eyes lighting up.
Somewhere between the bowling alley, the next bar, and the shopping mall you end up in, you start to really get to know Oscar. It’s funny how the night opens people up. Everything feels safer in the dark, surrounded by other people. It’s creeping up on 1am- in theory, both of you should be sound asleep. The fact that you’re not makes anything okay. You learn about his family, his childhood, his friends back home and in the UK. You tell him about yourself, too. He listens with an eager look on his face, laughing at all the right moments, squeezing your hand at the right ones, too.
You end up in a store that’s packed to the brim with stuffed animals. He lets you drag him around the whole thing, pointing out cute ones and the ones you think are a bit odd. Then you gasp, pointing excitedly, pulling on his hand.
“It’s you,” you squeak, the delirium beginning to set in. It’s a stuffed Kangaroo, and he groans softly. “Look, you’re even making the same face.”
Oscar seems unable to argue with that. Both he and the stuffed kangaroo do seem to be scowling. He smiles instead, picks it up, and takes it to the register. He buys it before you can really even say anything, and the cashier packages it in a bag. The kangaroo’s head sticks out over the paper, your second faithful companion for the night.
By 3am, Oscar is starting to drag. He perks up every time you look at him and smiles brightly, but you can tell. His grip on your hand is looser lately, and his blinks are growing longer and longer. You turn to him, a sympathetic smile on your face.
“We can go back to the hotel, if you want,” you say, poking his cheek lightly.
He smiles. “Are you tired?”
You sigh. “No, but you are.”
“I’m okay,” he insists, shaking his head. “What about the batting cages you mentioned? That sounded fun.”
You pout at him. “Oscar, you’re half asleep. You’d definitely get hit by a ball.”
He nods in agreement. “Maybe I just need another energy drink?”
You cock your head at him, take in his heavy eyelids, his parted lips. “That would be your third one of the night. And that would be very unhealthy.”
He nods again. “Yeah. Okay. Just… I said I’d be along for the ride.”
“We can hang out at the hotel,” you suggest. “The pool area is open all night.”
“I didn’t bring my swimsuit.”
“Me neither.”
You somehow end up with a pizza on your way back, and the two of you plant yourselves in the pool area on one of the chaise lounge chairs, the pizza box in front of you. You eat the greasy, cheesy food, and even Oscar indulges in it. He has his hand planted on the chair behind your back. Every so often you lean backs against his arm just to feel his presence. His knee bumps against yours, and you smile.
The pool is clear and blue. Neither of you will be swimming, but this felt like a neutral enough place. You’d thought about inviting him back to your room but had felt weird about it. There’s something calming about the still water and the smell of the chlorine, anyways.
He leans his head on your shoulder. The heavy weight of him is nice. He’s solid, sturdy, grounding. You’re chatting idly about something that happened at the race, something he’d missed while he was driving the car. You break off in the middle of a sentence to yawn, and then you close your eyes for just a moment. Oscar’s breath hitches.
The two of you are silent for a moment. You stare into the clear water, aching to drift and float and fall asleep. You sigh and pull your knees up to your chest.
“It started when I was a kid,” you tell him. “I just… stopped sleeping. It comes and goes in cycles. Sometimes I’m fine, sometimes I just…”
“Can’t sleep,” Oscar finishes for you, his words contradicting the sleepy tone of his voice.
“Yeah,” you say, blinking slowly again.
Your head droops, resting against his. He’s so warm, so comforting. He must feel you drifting, must feel your grip faltering, because then he’s sitting up, tucking you into his chest.
“Is there anything I can do?” He asks, drowsily.
“M’so tired,” you admit, curling into him. “Justwannasleep.”
Tears are stinging at your eyes. You hadn’t expected this, hadn’t been prepared for this part. The moment when your lack of sleep catches up to you, and you become an emotional, distraught mess. You’re seconds away from full on sobbing.
Oscar seems to sense this. “Okay. Okay, how about- I have a pull out couch in my suite. Why don’t you- if you’re comfortable, you could come sleep there. Maybe it would help to know somebody’s there if you need it? Maybe-“
“Okay,” you answer, nodding against his chest. “Okay, yeah.”
He takes care of the empty pizza box and guides you up to his room. You know there’ll be questions to answer if anyone sees you, but you’re comforted by the fact that it’s 4am and nearly every sane person is sound asleep. He scans into the room, and you let out a sigh when he lets go of your hand. He moves quickly, unfolding the pull out couch, grabbing extra blankets from the cabinets. Before you know it, you’re sitting down on the bed, rubbing your eyes.
It’s strange, now that you’re here. You’re in Oscar’s hotel room. You’ve just spent the night wandering Tokyo with him. You’re exhausted, sleep deprived, still on the verge of tears. Everything feels hazy and blurry.
“I can… go, if you want,” he says, and you blink up at him through your blurry vision. “Or I can sit with you till you fall asleep.”
“That might take a while,” you tell him. “Like, you’re more likely to fall asleep. Even… when I finally get to this point, it takes a while.”
He shrugs. “We could put on a movie.”
That’s exactly what you do. He turns on the tv, spots Finding Nemo on the guide, and turns it on. He sinks down on the bed, leaning against the couch back. You crawl up next to him as he turns the volume low. At first, you just sit shoulder to shoulder. Then he reaches out, wraps an arm around your shoulders, pulls you into his side. You sigh against him. Cradled close, you let the exhausted tears flow. He can’t see you, probably, and even if he can, you can’t bring yourself to care. He leans down, brushes his lips against your forehead.
“M’right here,” he says, softly. “I’ve got you.”
You wake up at 8am with your head in his lap. His alarm is blaring from the side table, and you’re both springing apart. He fumbles for his phone, shutting the alarm off with the shaky hands of someone who’s just been woken up from not nearly enough sleep.
You, on the other hand, have gotten the most consecutive sleep of your last two weeks. You stretch, rubbing the blur from your eyes and blinking at him.
“Sorry,” you mumble.
“For what?” He asks, voice steady.
“For… I don’t know. Keeping you up so late? Falling asleep on you?” You shrug. “I… that was a lot, for me to put that all on you.”
Oscar shrugs, so nonchalant about it. “It’s what friends are for.”
You nod, though you’re not convinced. You pull away, and Oscar’s soft smile drops to a flat frown. He reaches for you, but you dodge his touch.
“I should go,” you tell him. “We have to leave soon, people are going to be getting up and- if they see me come out of your room-“
“We can be friends,” he says, again, brows furrowing. “We didn’t do anything wrong, everything is okay-“
He doesn’t understand. It’s fine for him, but this is too much for you. He wants to be friends, but you’re looking at him and thinking about how if you could curl up on his chest every night, you might never have trouble sleeping again. He wants friends, you want more. You can’t have more, though, because there’s no way you’ll keep your job. And he doesn’t want that, anyways. Why would he? You’re just his pity project, the poor girl who can’t sleep, who fails at counting sheep.
“I should go,” you repeat, standing up. You can’t look at him, can’t watch him watching you. “Thank you. For everything. I’m sorry.”
He stands up too, and he grabs your hand. You pause, stuck between ripping your hand from his and running, or whirling around and snapping at him. Fight or flight. Instead, you take a deep breath. You’re still sleep deprived, still exhausted. 4 hours doesn’t fix two weeks of little to no sleep.
“I’m sorry,” you breathe, shoulders sagging. “I have a hard time letting people take care of me.”
“It’s okay,” Oscar says. “Just- come sit down? Let’s talk, okay?”
You sink down on the bed, rest your elbows on your knees and your face in your hands. “Why do you care?”
Oscar sits down next to you. He reaches out, knits your fingers together. You’re reminded of the art galleries, of the crowds, of the bowling alley. You split yourself open last night, in the safety of the time when you should’ve been sleeping. He saw you and he’s still here, somehow, hanging on. Your bones are tired. Your head is pounding. You need caffeine.
“I care,” he says, gently, “because I care about you. Because I think you’re a good person, and I want to get to know you better. And because this whole thing is not healthy.”
You sigh. His thumb brushes over the back of your hand methodically, back and forth. The funny thing is, you could fall asleep again, just like this. You could lean into his shoulder, let the warmth of him seep into your skin, and fall asleep. You wonder if he knows it.
“I’m fine,” you tell him, rubbing at your face sleepily. “Osc, I’ve been like this for years. It’s not just going to change now.”
“Not overnight,” he says, softly. There’s a callous on his thumb, you can feel the scrape of it over your skin. It’s oddly soothing. “But I can try. I can be here.”
“Why would you want to?”
“Because despite all the craziness, last night was the most fun I’ve had in weeks,” he says, and you could cry. “I want to spend time with you. I want to get to know you. Take you on dates. The whole nine yards.”
You should’ve expected this. Oscar can be shy, and quiet, but he can be straightforward, too. He’s pretty easy to read. He’s blunt with Lando, almost to the point of contention sometimes. But you’d been so focused on trying to prove to him that you were just fine that you hadn’t considered he was feeling the sparks, too. That maybe he wasn’t holding onto you in the crowd just so he didn’t lose you. That maybe he liked the feeling of your skin on his, too.
“If you want that,” he says, voice low.
You blink blearily, pull away to look up at him. “I do.”
He nods, leans forward, kisses your forehead. The rest of it will come later, you think. You can work all the details out when you’re both more awake. Right now, he pulls you into his chest and flops back onto the bed.
“We have an hour before anyone comes looking for us,” he says, rubbing your back lightly. “Close your eyes? You don’t have to sleep, just-“
You blink once, twice, and then you’re fast asleep before he can get another word out.
…..
Oscar wins the sprint race in Qatar, and then takes second on Sunday. He’s nothing but endless wide grins all weekend, despite the heat and the dehydration and his obvious exhaustion. You laugh when you watch him lay down on the floor in the cool down room and smile when he gets sprayed with champagne on the podium. He chases you through the garage afterwards to give you a hug, despite your screeching about how sticky he is.
He tucks you into his chest. “Couldn’t have done it without you, baby.”
Later, you help corral a very tired Oscar and Lando to the shuttles and back to the hotel. They’re each stumbling over their own feet, giggling and laughing about the race, shoving at each other’s shoulders. For a minute, you’re walking through an empty parking lot, far from any other McLaren staff, and Oscar links his fingers with yours. They fit together like puzzle pieces. His fingers are sticky with champagne, but you can’t bring yourself to care. Lando sees and doesn’t say anything, just smiles.
You’re keeping it quiet for now. Time to figure it out between the two of you before you get your bosses involved. You have a feeling it’ll be mostly okay. You’ll figure it out, one way or another.
You follow Oscar up to his hotel room, saying goodnight to Lando as he heads further down the hall. He knits his fingers with yours again, leads you into his room, and collapses onto the bed.
“I’m exhausted,” he says, scrubbing a hand over his face. “Are you?”
You smile down at him, laid out on the bed. He should probably shower, at the very least change his clothes, but you can’t bring yourself to tell him that.
You sigh. “I mean, yeah, but if you’re asking if I’ll be able to sleep… probably not.”
He nods in understanding and purses his lips. “D’you think… would you just… stay, until I fall asleep?” He asks, blinking up at you. “After that you can take my card and get a Red Bull and go do whatever, just-“
“Yeah, I’ll stay,” you tell him.
It’s the easiest thing you’ve ever done. He gets ready for bed, and you do the same. You lean against the headboard and he crawls up the bed. He puts his head on a pillow in your lap, curls up into a little c shape. He’s very cat like, you’ve noticed, especially when he’s sleepy. You run your fingers through his hair, the tv playing quietly in the background, and he sighs and closes his eyes.
“Goodnight,” you murmur, leaning down to press a kiss to his temple.
He’s out within minutes. Oscar is a sound sleeper. You could move him, could shift his head and get up. You could wander the halls, take his card and buy all the energy drinks you desire. But you look down at him, his brow unfurrowed, lips parted, and you can’t bring yourself to do it. You could sit here and watch him breathe all night. It’s a terrifying and comforting thought, all at once.
You don’t sleep. It’s likely you’ll crash on the flight home, or maybe shortly after that. With your luck, you’ll pass out in a meeting when you get back to the MTC. Oscar doesn’t scold you when he wakes up and it’s obvious you’ve been awake all night.
He gets you coffee from the breakfast bar, exactly how you like it. And when he finds you in the backseat of the airport shuttle, he hands you a tangerine Red Bull. It’s early, the sun just peeking up over the horizon, washing the whole city with orange. He’s smiling at you, and you’re smiling right back.
When you fall asleep on his shoulder on the way to the airport, nobody dares to say a word.
…..
“Did you hear we’re gonna be sponsored by Monster next year?” Lando asks, throwing a tennis ball at a wall in the courtyard.
You sit up in the grass nearby, eyes lighting up. “You’re kidding. Free Monster?”
Oscar, whose stomach you’d been laying on, sits up behind you and wraps his arm around your waist. He rests his chin on your shoulder.
“Your consumption will be restricted,” he says, and you laugh.
You suppose that’s fair. Besides, Monster is fine, but nothing will ever top tangerine Red Bull.
check out the companion blurb, Glad You’re Here
thanks for reading, hope you sleep better than me! you can find my other fics here! sweet dreams y’all
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diah-the-demon · 1 year
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AM HOME
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nadvs · 21 days
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watch and learn (part seven)
pairing fratboy! rafe cameron x female reader
rating explicit 18+
content warning drug and alcohol use
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summary it takes one conversation with your college dorm neighbor to know you won’t get along. rafe is loud, rude, and short-tempered. after he overhears you talking about a disappointing fling, he loses his confidence in his sexual abilities and suggests you start hooking up to both improve your skills in the bedroom. you can’t stand him, but it’s too good of an offer to turn down.
» masterlist
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The next morning, you sleep in, recovering from the party. Your head is still foggy as you scroll through your phone in bed, thinking about last night.
You spent a lot of time with Blake. He was nice and charming and all you did was talk and share innocent touches. He’s nothing but green flags.
Yet your mind kept reminding you of Rafe. And it kept replaying the sight of him kissing another girl.
Something between you two shifted the other day, when you dropped by after his dad’s visit. You agreed that you were friends. And then did something that friends definitely don’t do.
Then, of course, he took a few days to be a jerk. But last night, he mustered up a sorry for you, flirting with you again.
It’s almost like he’s leaving breadcrumbs, making you think he has feelings, with the possessiveness and the compliments and the looks he gives you. But time and time and time again, Rafe proves to you that he’s a douchebag who’s not looking for anything more than sex.
And neither are you, you remind yourself. Not with Rafe. He would break your heart if given the chance. And you’re not giving him the chance.
You see a text from Rafe from a couple of hours ago: you up?
You reply: i am now.
You open Instagram to see that Blake posted a story a few minutes ago. It’s a photo of a sign on the side of a building. He’s at a paintball range with his frat brothers. It must be another bonding event.
The text on the photo reads: let’s goooo red team.
You reply to the story: putting all my money on the red team.
He responds: I’ll win for you :)
Rafe has never played paintball before, but it couldn’t have come at a better time. His gun is loaded with blue pellets and he has Blake in his sights before the starting bell even rings.
This will be the best way to release his anger over the fact that he’s losing you. Well, other than getting naked with you and fucking until he can’t think straight. But you weren’t answering your phone this morning. So, this’ll do.
The field is vast under the cloudy sky, cluttered full of obstacles and barriers and embankments. When the game starts, Rafe has one goal and one goal only.
He hates how you were smiling at Blake last night. He hates how you touched his shoulder. How you laughed. How close you were.
Mere minutes into the game, he’s behind a colorfully splattered wall and finally finds Blake in his crosshairs. His finger presses down on the trigger over and over and over again, each pop loud and echoing, coating the front of Blake’s vest with bright blue drops of paint.
“Jesus, Rafe, I think you got him, man!” one of his teammates shouts with a laugh.
Even though one of his buddies on the red team nails Rafe in his arm a couple of times near the end of the round, the game ends in a blue team victory.
As the boys make their way back into the building, Blake shoves Rafe’s shoulder.
“The fuck was that, Cameron?” Blake asks, pointing to his vest, sheathed in blue. His smile is wide, but his tone is sharp. He’s trying to hide it, but he seems actually pissed off. Good.
“My bad, man,” Rafe half-chuckles, lifting his helmet off his head. “Got lost in the game. I love to win.”
The high from winning this stupid game is so intensely gratifying that Rafe wants to keep beating Blake in everything. Including in getting your attention.
When Rafe checks his phone as they leave the range, he sees you finally responded. He’s craving you now, but he’ll see you in a few hours at tonight’s party. And he wants Blake to see you with him.
He was stupid to think he could stay away from you. He’s going to see you as many times as you let him before your touches with Blake have more meaning behind them.
The “anything but clothes” party is slated to start at the Sigma Chi house in a few minutes. You and Liv decide to show up right on time to hang out with the guys and drink before the liquor runs out.
You made a stop at a party store off-campus to buy rolls of caution tape together, deciding to wrap the bright yellow nylon into haphazard tube tops and mini skirts, stuck together with clear packing tape. You’re careful so that the sticky tape is only on the caution tape, not directly touching any skin at all.
When you enter the house, you follow the noise in the kitchen. A group of frat boys are in the dining room, setting up the keg and putting out cups.
Blake and Rafe are standing with four other guys, talking as they set up.
Rafe should’ve put more effort into what he wore. He has a towel around his hips and when you walk in wearing next to nothing, he regrets it immediately. A boner would be way too fucking obvious.
Blake greets you with a side-hug and Rafe cracks his knuckles under the table.
“Hey, how was paintball?” you ask. “Did you win?”
“Lost and I’m wounded.” Blake’s wearing a plastic bag over his chest and another around his hips. He puts his hand over his sternum, the bag crinkling beneath his fingers.
“What the hell happened?” you laugh, placing your hand on his. He pretends to wince in pain when you touch him, making you laugh again. The sight makes Rafe scowl.
“Rafe went all Scarface on him,” Sam says. You look to Rafe, and at the same time, glass shatters in the kitchen behind you.
“Shit!” a guy shouts.
“So glad tomorrow’s thing is outside,” Blake mumbles. “This place is a mess and it’s only gonna get worse.”
“What’s tomorrow?” you ask.
“Family day,” Sam says. “We’re having a barbecue.”
“Do you guys have something going on every weekend?” Liv asks.
“Pretty much,” Blake in a bragging tone.
“And when do you study?” you say.
“During the week, fun police,” Blake mumbles with a playful smile. You hate the label and think back to a conversation you had with him over text about nicknames.
“Don’t call me that, babe,” you respond. Blake told you before that he loathes being called babe.
Rafe doesn’t know you’re saying it ironically. And he’s trying not to lose his mind. He looks down at his beer and takes another sip.
A moment passes and he doesn’t notice that Blake is trying to get his attention until he realizes seven pairs of eyes are on him.
“What?” Rafe asks.
“Who are you bringing tomorrow?” Blake repeats.
“I’m not coming.” Rafe can’t imagine even mentioning the event to anyone in his family.
“What? Why not?” Blake says. “I need to meet who raised you to be so fucking competitive.”
Rafe looks away the same way he did when you confronted his dad for yelling at him. It’s not exactly annoyance in his expression, like you’re used to seeing. It’s discomfort. Embarrassment.
You don’t want anyone to grill him. Not about his family. You can still hear the way his father snapped at him, asked what he was crying for.
“Sounds like you’re just mad that you’re such an easy target,” you say to Blake, primarily to take everyone’s eyes off of Rafe.
You earn a few jeers, heads turning back in your direction. Rafe’s eyes find yours and you glance at him to see a softened expression, the hard lines in his face suddenly gone.
“I’d like to see you try to play paintball,” Blake says.
“Yeah, you’re really selling it,” you respond sarcastically, snapping your gaze back to meet his.
“What other events do you guys have planned?” Liv asks.
As Blake goes into the schedule for the rest of the year - including a community service drive, a Sadie Hawkins formal, and a camping trip - Rafe can’t keep his eyes off of you.
He can’t forget how you stood up to his father, a total stranger, and told him to calm down. He can’t forget how happy your silly little gift made him.
Maybe you were just flirting with Blake, but he wonders if you purposely took the attention off of him, knowing what you know about his family.
You two are friends that have great sex, he knows that, but he’s staring at you like you’re more. You can be irritating and a tight-ass, but you’re kind and thoughtful, too.
Rafe looks away. These thoughts make him uneasy all over. He’s not a feelings kind of guy. And Blake is so obviously your type and Rafe is nothing like him.
He’s not stupid. Anything more than sex between you two would be ridiculous.
The house fills up with partygoers quickly, air thickening, music loud and conversations even louder.
Later on in the night, Rafe’s buzzed and standing by the keg, watching you dance with your friend. The way you roll your hips reminds him of how you move when you’re on top of him and he needs to force himself to look away before he gets hard. Again.
Eventually, he notices you head towards the back of the house alone and he takes the opportunity to talk to you.
When you leave the bathroom and head down the dark hallway back towards the party, you notice Rafe leaning by the wall, a beer bottle in his hand. There’s only a handful of people around, engaging in quiet, private conversation as the music throbs around you.
“Hey,” he says. He wishes he thought of something more clever to say, but he’s pretty close to being drunk.
It’s kind of sweet that he’s waiting here for you. But then you remind yourself he’s just horny.
“Hey,” you say, eyes flitting down his athletic body and to the navy blue towel sitting at his hips. “Pretty lazy of you to use a towel.”
“Nah, it’s smart,” he quips. “That tape is perfect for you.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” you say.
“You can read, can’t you?” Rafe simply says, his hand ghosting over the bold CAUTION on your chest. You look down at the way his long fingers just barely brush over your breasts, imagining the way they were massaging you earlier this week.
The reminder sends a swirl of warm passion in your core. You want him again. And again. And again.
“Are you trying to say I’m dangerous? I’m not the one attacking people during an innocent game of paintball.”
“I got hit, too, okay?” Rafe complains. He brings his right arm forward, showing you his flexed bicep.
“I don’t see anything,” you laugh.
“These red marks are turning into bruises,” he says, pointing to his skin. “I’ll need you to take care of me.”
“I think you’re just being a fuckboy,” you respond.
Rafe’s smirk is playful and inviting and you realize you’re only inches away from each other, eyes connected and smiles mirrored.
You want to see him naked again. Neither of you had any pointers last time you hooked up, but that doesn’t mean you’re done learning, right?
“I’ve never gotten a ‘you up?’ text at ten in the morning,” you say. Admittedly, you were a little dejected that he didn’t reply to your message earlier today.
“You woke up late,” Rafe says, eyebrows quirking up for a second. “When’d you even get home?”
In reality, he wants to know if you were with Blake. He didn’t see you at last night’s party after he made out with a girl just to unsuccessfully make you jealous. Maybe you messed around with Blake and stayed up late with him.
“I don’t remember,” you admit with a defeated laugh. “I think I need to cool it on the partying. You frat boys never stop. I can’t believe how many things you guys have going on.”
Rafe breathes a sardonic chuckle, looking down, and you’re immediately reminded of tomorrow’s event.
Just like that, the air between you shifts. You’re both thinking of the same thing. You’re painfully aware of it.
Silence settles between you and you nervously scratch your arm.
“I wouldn’t want to bring him, either,” you finally say. Rafe’s eyes meet yours. He instantly knows you’re talking about his father.
Now he’s sure you weren’t just carrying on conversation with Blake earlier. You purposely took the attention off of him. Because you’re friends. Friends help each other.
“Yeah,” is all Rafe can say.
“Did you…” you say softly. “Do you not have anyone else you’d want to come?”
Rafe thinks of his life back home. His father, who never shies away from expressing his disappointment. His step-mother, who he has no relationship with. Sarah, who’s the clear favorite. Wheezie, who Rafe actually likes and sort of misses, but wouldn’t be able to visit on her own.
“No,” he admits. “It’s… I don’t have that kind of family.”
“Must be why you’re into this whole frat thing,” you say. You can’t stop yourself from trying to understand his complexities.
Rafe didn’t think about it that way. But the sense of camaraderie he has with his frat brothers, except for one in particular, does give him a sense of belonging he’s been chasing forever. He didn’t even realize it until you said it.
But that’s what you do. You make him think and feel things he hasn’t before and it’s so uncomfortable and exciting at the same time.
“You’re…” Rafe tugs at his earlobe. “You’re a really nice person.”
“What?” You laugh in disbelief. Is he being sweet to you outside of the bedroom?
“You did that on purpose, didn’t you?” he says. “When he asked me why I’m not going tomorrow, you changed the subject.”
He can’t say Blake’s name.
“Guilty,” you say. You settle into eye contact that’s unlike anything you two have shared before. Rafe huffs, wanting to force away the tension sitting in his chest.
“I think you’re into this whole frat thing, too, by the way,” he says. He leans even closer to you, blue eyes focused on your lips.
“Not at all,” you joke, shaking your head. “I hate you guys.”
“Really,” Rafe mutters, his tone low. “Even me?”
“Especially you.”
“You don’t remember what you said last time we fucked? When I asked if I could put it in?”
Your skin burns as you think back to the way he asked you if you were ready before burying into you.
“You must be thinking about another girl,” you say. He won’t even entertain the thought.
“You said please,” he rasps.
“Well, at least I have manners,” you reply, looking him in the eye as anticipation curls in your stomach, refusing to shy away.
“You gonna beg me for it again?”
“I did not beg,” you respond.
You want to tease him even more, tell him you thought you were experts now, so what’s the point of hooking up anymore? But you don’t need it to be instructional to have sex with him. He doesn’t seem to need it, either.
“Don’t tell me you’re still shy about liking it.” His smirk is taunting. This cracks you, a smile spreading on your face again, your eyes trailing down his bare chest.
“Maybe,” you tease. It’s a lie. You’re not shy at all anymore. The sense of shame you felt around sex before is gone. At least with Rafe, it has.
“How can you be shy when you’re wearing that?” Rafe asks. “Showing fucking everything.”
“You’re one to talk,” you say, nose crinkling. The way you cock your head as you gaze at his body, your lashes fluttering as you blink, makes his gut warm and his groin tighten. Wow. He really doesn’t even need to touch you to get hard.
“And don’t act like you don’t like my outfit,” you say, meeting his eyes again. You shock yourself with your forwardness. He looks pleasantly surprised, too.
You hear your name being shouted. Liv rushes towards you, hands pressed over her chest.
“My tape broke,” she laughs. “I almost flashed everyone.”
“Really?” you gasp. Rafe is annoyed that you got interrupted, but he finds that he really likes what caring for somebody looks like on you. Your eyes deepen. Your brows lower. Your guard is down. You’re stunning.
“We should’ve brought extra tape,” Liv says.
“We can borrow a shirt,” you suggest. “Let’s find Blake.”
Rafe is seething. Blake. Of fucking course.
You offer Rafe a tight smile before taking your friend’s hand and walking in front of her to shield her.
When you find Blake, he leads you and Liv upstairs to his room, scrambling through his dresser to find a shirt for Liv.
“I’m not gonna get kicked out for wearing clothes, am I? It’s against the rules,” Liv says.
“No, only ‘cause you’re friends with fun police over here,” Blake replies, smiling over his shoulder as he hands a black shirt to Liv. “Special privileges.”
“I told you not to call me that,” you say with a laugh. Liv pulls the shirt over her head.
“Thanks!” she calls as she walks out of the room, a grin on her face. You know she’s purposely leaving you alone with Blake.
You meet Blake’s eyes, standing in the middle of his quiet, private room.
“Study fort’s gone,” you notice, looking down at his bare floor.
“Oh. Yeah,” he says stiffly. It’s awkward between you and you’re not sure why. “You look…”
Blake doesn’t finish his sentence. You knew he was a bit on the shy side, but he’s actually nervous.
You would normally find it endearing. But because of the intoxicating way Rafe was talking to you downstairs, how he’s so unafraid of telling you how attracted he is to you, you feel tense around Blake for the first time.
Still, intrigue coarses through you. You like him. You want him to flirt with you and to touch you and to finally kiss you. But he’s still.
Rafe spots your friend in the crowd with a t-shirt on. And you’re not next to her. He pushes through people to stand beside Liv and ask her where you are.
“Upstairs with Blake,” Liv simply responds. Rafe glances up the staircase, lips twisting as he nods. He stalks away, storming through the house with no real idea of where to go.
He paces around for a few minutes. He wants to rush upstairs and hurt Blake. Badly. Without a paintball gun this time. The thought of you being up there in his room, of his hands on you, of him on top of you… It’s too much. He’s grinding his teeth so hard that it hurts.
Rafe has had enough. He heads back towards the front of the house, not sure what the hell he’ll do if he walks in on Blake on top of you, but before he can go upstairs, he sees you in the crowd, chatting with your friend.
“I left you alone up there for a reason,” Liv says quietly when you approach her.
“Oh, I’m aware,” you laugh. “But the vibe was weird, so I left. I think we were both nervous.”
After Blake couldn’t finish his sentence, you thanked him for helping your friend and split.
“Do you not like him?” Liv asks.
You do. But you think you like someone else, too. And it’s terrifying.
Rafe weaves through the crowds, approaching you, his fingers gently wrapping around your wrist. You watch him duck to speak into your ear.
“Leave with me,” he says so only you can hear him over the music. You look at Liv, who has a sly, knowing expression on her face.
“I can’t abandon my friend just to hook up with you,” you say to him. A painful pang of rejection twists inside him.
“But do you want to?” Rafe asks. He needs to be sure. What if your next words are that you’re with Blake now?
Your pulse is racing. The promise of another night with Rafe is electrifying.
“Yes,” you admit. He smiles to himself, pulling back to look at Liv.
“You gonna be okay if she leaves?” Rafe says, tilting his head towards you.
“Of course, if she wants to,” Liv replies with an amused laugh.
Rafe pulls you towards him, out of the crowd. And for once, he’s actually glad to see Blake, who’s standing by the keg with a few friends.
He wraps his arm around your waist, mumbling to you that he’s going to rip that stupid tape off of you, as he glares at Blake, who’s staring at you two with a disconcerted grimace.
He leads you out of the rowdy house, grip tight on you as if he could lose you again.
The second you’re in Rafe’s dorm room, his hands are on your ass, fingers dipping under the tape. You wrap your arms around his shoulders, kissing him heatedly as you stand by his bed.
You can smell his cologne and his shampoo as his tongue runs over yours.
“You know everyone was looking at you tonight, right?” he says between kisses.
“No,” you scoff. While he’s helped you gain some confidence, you can’t imagine thinking of yourself as the most desired girl in a room.
“I told you not to do that,” he says against your lips. You feel the nylon around your ass lift off your skin as he tugs it away, pulling apart the material, tape unsticking.
“Do what?” you mutter. He grips your ass, feeling the fabric of your underwear on his palms. You lower a hand to undo the knot keeping up the towel on him.
“You pretend like you’re not beautiful and it pisses me off,” he says. Beautiful. He said hot before. But not beautiful. He never used that word with you. “How hard do I have to fuck you for you to get it?”
“Rafe,” you gasp with a giggle.
“How hard?” he asks. “Until you can’t talk?”
His towel drops and he kisses your neck, tugging at the tape bound around your chest. You shift to wrap your hand around his length over his boxers, aching for the feeling of him inside of you.
Rafe loves that you touch him like this now, without any hesitation. He rips the tape off of your chest, his fingers burning.
While you wore panties just in case, you’re glad you went without a bra simply because of the way Rafe breathes when he looks down to see your bare chest.
He fondles your tits with eager, rough movements, squeezing as he clenches his jaw.
“Every guy was staring at you, but only I get to do this.” His lips are against your neck, breath hot.
You tense for a second. He shouldn’t say shit like this. His words are possessive and tender and way too fucking heavy.
But you push yourself out of your head, focusing on how you feel physically, forgetting the emotions that have slowly been tacking themselves onto you like the crumpled tape on the floor.
You dip your hand into his boxers, wrapping your hand around his girth. Rafe inhales sharply, squeezing his eyes shut as you stroke him slowly. You drag your hand to his tip, feeling the warm precum and spreading it with your thumb.
“Fuck,” he groans.
“You like that?” you whisper with a smile. It’s exciting talking like this. You were always quiet when hooking up with a guy, but Rafe has pushed you completely out of your shell.
“Get on my bed,” he says gruffly, pressing your hips back. You lie down, watching his cock spring out of his boxers when he tugs them off.
Rafe almost asks to skip the condom, but it feels too intimate. Too serious. And he’s sure you’d say no.
You pull your panties off as he rolls on the latex and gets on his knees, sinking onto the mattress, hands gripping your ankles. He shifts and rests your ankles on his broad shoulders, his hands skimming down your legs.
He drags a thumb over your wet clit, gazing down at you with yearning as he spreads your slick arousal over you. You moan at the sensation, realizing just how sensitive you are from how long it’s been and how much you missed him.
“You’re fucking soaked,” Rafe rasps. “Who got you like this, baby?”
“You did,” you reply. The words coming out of your mouth are so fucking soothing. He can’t think about anyone else doing this to you. Only him.
Rafe pulls his hand off of you to grip your thigh and holds his cock at its base with his other hand, tapping it over your middle. You look at him, eyes meeting in an exquisite, mutual longing.
“Say please,” he teases.
“You say please,” you reply, smirking. Rafe shakes his head in disbelief and awe and desire, his hair falling over his forehead.
He can’t wait. He guides himself into you, slipping in so easily, feeling just how drenched and tight and warm you are. He groans as you take him in with a deep breath, tilting to feel the curve of his cock.
“That’s so fucking nice,” he whispers, watching himself push into you. “Your pussy is so fucking nice.”
His fingers dig into your thigh as he pulls back and pushes in again. You throw your head back as he shoves himself into you, filling you completely, the pressure hard and incredible.
Rafe’s thumb is on your clit again, rubbing in circles as he thrusts, making you tremble. Your mouth is agape, your hands above your head as he pleasures you.
It’s such a phenomenal view to him. Pleasure written on your face, your tits bouncing, your chest heaving, your body jolting.
You feel your stomach tighten, the rising sensation making you moan. Rafe starts to go harder, rubbing faster, a smile curling on his lips as he watches you.
“I…” you breathe. “Fuck, I…”
“Can’t talk?” he rasps, amused. You bite your bottom lip and moan a giggle, willing yourself to look at him before he has to tell you to.
His gaze is piercing into you as you feel yourself dissolve into ecstasy, your body going numb before it heats with the most amazing feeling you’ve ever had.
Rafe feels you clenching around his cock and he leans over to get as deep into you as possible, your legs bending as his shoulders push you forward.
After you come down from your orgasm, he places his hand on your cheek, dipping his thumb into your mouth.
You stare at him as he drives into you and you wrap your lips around his thumb, tasting yourself. Rafe might just go crazy. You take him so much better than he’s ever had before.
He tightens and you watch the euphoria wash over his face, his brows furrowing and his lips parting. You love that you can do this to him, that a man so commanding and dominant and brash crumbles like this when he’s inside you.
He cums in hard pulses, hips bucking with every jerk, seeing stars. When he slowly pulls out, you close your eyes, sighing in pleasure.
Your palms rest over your eyes, feeling high off the feeling as you feel him shift off the mattress. When you catch your breath, you open your eyes to see Rafe offering you a towel.
“You have fun?” he asks. You can tell he’s trying to do the whole aftercare thing, but because it’s not genuine, you’d rather not play along.
It’s clear he wants you to leave with the way he’s holding out the towel, surely wishing you’d cover up and go. You’re not surprised. You sit up, taking the towel and wrapping it around your body.
“C-minus,” you say.
“What?”
“Kidding,” you laugh. You stand to leave and decide to let him deal with the mess of caution tape on his floor, desperate to be alone so you can pull yourself together.
You go so suddenly that Rafe watches his door shut with confusion. He thought you’d wipe yourself down with the towel he gave you, maybe sit a while with him.
He oddly wanted you to stay a little bit. He liked joking around with you earlier tonight. It was fun.
But you were so eager to go. Probably because Rafe is the kind of guy you fuck and forget, and Blake is the kind of guy you make love to and stick around for.
He knows that he’s in a competition he’ll eventually lose because he can’t offer you a relationship. You said yourself he’d be the worst boyfriend ever the night he told you not to cuddle him.
But he’ll happily take these nights with you for as long as possible. And he’ll keep fighting for as many as he can.
When you make it to your dorm, you sit on your bed, breathless. Just when you think the sex can’t get any better with Rafe, it does.
He almost disappointed you with his lack of emotion afterwards, but you’re glad you didn’t give him the power to. He’ll always let you down in that department. As long as you keep any feelings for him at bay, you know you’ll be fine.
After you feel a bit calmer, you check your phone to see five texts.
Liv: didn’t get a chance to tell you but rafe is down BAD for you
Liv: when i told him you were upstairs with blake he looked like he was about to kill someone
Liv: hope you have fun lol :)
Liv: i sure am… i made out with sam after you left… oops
Then you see a block of text in the next notification.
Blake: Gotta be honest. I wanted to kiss you when we were in my room but you make me really nervous haha. Can I take you on a date? A real one. Not just a study date lol. All good if you’re not into it. Let me know.
(part eight)
author’s note: thank you anon for this iconic idea!!
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