#this isn't worth the wait LOL
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hi I really like the dumb blonde story! Will you write more of it? If not that's okay!
hsjdh
(also can you tag me if you do so I can see it?)
@wacko-weirdo sorry it took like a million years,,,, i had no idea what to write LOL , this one is for u my liege
i pledge allegiance to dumb blondes (2!)
part 1!
The villain didn’t know why he thought this would be easy. The hero was loud and attracted a lot of attention, not only to themself but to the villain as well. They would insist on keeping the other soldiers occupied with card games and nightcaps that kept them dizzy till morning which resulted in ten extra laps around the base during morning drills.
They complained about broken nails, needed 15 minutes to do their hair, insisted on a private bathroom and argued with authoritative figures, but worst of all, they seemed to take a liking to the villain. They had gotten comfortable far too quickly. Though they never had the pleasure of fighting each other on the field, the sparring practice late at night behind the cafeteria proved the villain was missing out. The hero wasn’t good to any extent- but they were fun.
To say the villain liked them was an overstatement. Perhaps saying the hero liked the villain was too. The villain could barely stomach when they showed up to breakfast practically shirtless, when they laughed at half-assed jokes, and returned lazy and suggestive compliments. But the villain liked them on the ground. Panting, bloody, covered in bruises and dirt. He liked it when they bounced back in a pathetic attempt to bring the villain down. He liked the way they’d try stalling by flirting, it was different when they did it with the villain as compared to the soldiers- it was malicious with intent.
“That was terrible.” The hero was on the ground, staining the cuff of their sleeve by cleaning the blood off their face. “Get up,” he demanded.
The villain grabbed them by the collar of their jumpsuit. The hero only chuckled.
“Ok. Ok. I’m up.” They rasped.
“It’s been a month. You haven’t gotten any better. You’re wasting my time, hero.” The hero grabbed the villain’s wrist that was still gripping tightly to their collar.
“Maybe I don’t wanna get better. Maybe I like the way you hit me.”
Despite himself, the villain was amused. The hero was anything but heroic. They'd make a terrible captain.
“You’re insane. I can’t wait to kill you.” The hero smiled at that- like it was the first real compliment they received since they arrived at the base. They got their footing and the villain let go. The hero feigned disappointment.
“There goes my plan to continue your rehabilitation,” they sighed "why continue training me then?"
“It’s more so for myself. It’d be boring if you died so quickly.” he turned to his jacket he’d disregarded when the fight was getting stuffy. "Besides, it's not like you're learning much of anything."
“I should kill you.”
The villain clicked their tongue. “Now, now. Heroes don’t kill, sweetheart.” Before he could reach for his jacket, a force threw him down. The villain had almost forgotten the feeling of panic-fueled adrenaline, like a shock through his body.
In less than the second the villain took to realize what was going on, the hero was straddling his hips and sending two punches (one for good measure) right to his jaw. The villain spit out blood and stopped struggling against their tight hold.
The fact that the hero of all people had managed to overpower the villain was a cold realization that sent shivers up the his spine; (that could have also been thanks to the hero's muscular thighs around them- but who's to say) they were getting sloppy. The villain was at ease where he should definitely not have been.
Having the hero as his pawn in the game was as sobering of a thought as having the hero being the only pawn in the game, his plan, his magnum opus.
The hero could very easily destroy the villain's plan and make him start from zero, but if he played his cards right- they were also the key to his victory. Ironically, it wasn't much better on the hero's side: the hero needed the villain for their own reasons. Both extremely vital, but useless, if not fatal, if uncooperative. The villain knew the hero knew this. This is to say who is in control here?
After hero caught their breath, their hands landed on the villain's chest, applying enough pressure to be considered a warning.
“I win.” They smiled. “I may not be strong, but if I’m good at something it’s looking for an opening.” their lips curled into something knowing, something taunting. "Opportunities come in all shapes and sizes." They patted the villain's chest, almost amicably.
“I noticed, all with how natural it is for you to get on top of someone."
"Thanks." they sneered. No venom.
They leaned down, their lips dangerously close to the shell of his ear.
“I know what your plan is. Trust me I won’t make it easy.” The villain only listened, coming to the exciting realization he was the hero's only pawn as well; no one was in control. And they had entered a complex mutually dependent situation. Perhaps the first for both of them. How romantic.
The villain turned his head, lips touching the hero's cheek as they whispered.
"Perhaps I’ll underestimate you when the time comes. But for now, you’re nothing more than a teenager whose daddy didn’t let play with the big kids.”
“Ohh, it’s going to be so much fun bringing you down”
“Oh, the most fun. But we have things to do before then, don’t we?”
The hero pulled their face up to stare at the villain. Neither one of them looked away as they glared daggers. The hero finally chuckled, breathlessly.
“You know what the other soldiers say about us?” The hero whispered, the electric tension immediately disappearing. They seemed to be good at that.
“Can you blame them? A popular hero and reformed villain sneak away in the middle of the night for hours.” The villain explained. “Bound to raise some eyebrows.”
“Imagine the drama when we become best of friends at Hero HQ, only for a heartbreaking betrayal.”
“You’ve always been a spectacle, Hero.” The hero finally got off the villain, lending a hand the villain accepted and didn’t let go of once they were both standing. “You seem ok. But something tells me you’re so much worse.”
“You’re a bad influence. And a wretched teacher.”
“Unfixable, some would say.”
“Clearly.”
#hero x villain#villain x hero#writing#original fiction#hero and villain#this isn't worth the wait LOL#i hate these guys#boooo#tomato tomato
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I'm over people saying "give the live action a chance before you criticize it" like trailers are mostly a marketing tool to convince ppl to watch smth but they're also there to let viewers decide whether they think smth is worth their time. if people look at trailers & promo and decide they aren't gonna like it based on that that's no one's problem but the marketing team's
#like yes I'm a hater I've been a hater since the live action was announced#not gonna stop so I can give one episode a chance when I know it's gonna disappoint me lol#like ??? idk the idea of people watching promo materials and seeing what the people involved in the actual production are saying#and responding to those things with criticism and saying actually I don't think this is worth my time#isn't a problem#you're free to be annoyed with people's opinions but it's dumb to say they should wait to form opinions before actually watching the show#like that's not what promo material is supposed to let you do....#it'd be one thing if this were a new show entirely but it's not#also there's a probably white dude playing sokka & I have not and will never get over that so#ruins the whole show for me as a sokka stan lmao#(although even if he was native he's not impressing me - sorry should I wait to watch more before forming that opinion)
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i understand there still is many shallow and bad faith criticisms directed at the early disney princesses because pointing out how they don't measure up as well to today's standards became easy clickbaity talking point, a sentiment that is being repurpused by disney in order to promote their more recent movies as being 'not like the other ones' because their princesses are girlbosses now when they're not outright attempting to correct the original movie in their shitty remakes. everyone rightfully is sick of it by this point, and that's definitely happening to the upcoming snow white remake too right now, but. seeing some of the reactions to it, i do think that we have circled back to overcorrecting when it comes to this this resulting in equally baffling takes about these characters being common right now.
i mean yeah, rachel zegler saying that her snow white dreams of being a leader instead of being with the prince because she's a girlboss now is not good, but that doesn't mean that the original movie version of her wasn't this bizarre idealized vision of what a perfect woman should be and act like. we can argue that she was a young abused girl all we like, defend and analyze her portrayal through these lenses, but at the end of the day, snow white is just not a real person. and she was quite explicitly written to represent something - the ideal woman - and that something does have a lot to say about the culture that created her, which traits were valued in women at the time (youth, purity, passivity, motherly nature, the very white skin that's in her name), and it doesn't look great. as much as we like to make fun of modern disney, it's still ridiculous to ignore something as obvious as that about their older films, i think
#doesn't mean btw there isn't anything of worth an abuse victim might take out of these stories#these are the situations they are portraying and to someone who who feels helpless and trapped they might be very comforting. still#ppl saying 'she wasn't waiting for a prince to save her' she was though. literally the first song she sings is about that lol#cinderella is actually more in line with that because the prince really was an afterthought to her#AND she had more of a backbone and even complained about about her exhausting routine#still even her does fall under a similar category because she does also represent an ideal woman#both are rewarded by the story in the end mostly for their beauty and good behavior
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Between
2x08 S: "As long as I'm doing something to help out a friend, I don't mind what it is! I just want to be there for 'em when they need me. Because at the end of the day, helping my friends is more important than anything in the world!"
3x03 Mei: "So wait, how did you get your gold vision back again?" MK: "I don't know! The same way I got them in the first place I guess. Every time I learned a new ability, it was because there was something I NEEDED to do, when there was no other way. Against the gold fish guy I NEEDED to do something to save my friends!" P: "Yeah, friends that YOU put in danger on purpose!"
3x10 MK: "NO! Mei is my best friend, I’d never abandon her when she needs me. We’re heroes! It’s what we do!",
3x14 MK: "A perfect world is what you make it. So as long as I have my friends by my side...this world! Is! Perfect!”
4x01 MK: "Honestly? I’m kinda liking the world as it is, right now. So...if it could just stay like this, forever? That would be awesome." SWK: "Yeah well...forever’s a long time bud...trust me."
4x02 AL: "It’s too late to save them! We can’t risk unleashing the curse into the world." MK: “You don’t know! We’d risk it for sure! I won’t abandon them when they need us."
4x07 IMK: "You can see it, can't you? This is your fate. Your friends will turn on you, seeing you for the monster you will become. They will destroy you, harbinger of chaos."
4x11 MK: "We have to try, he'd do the same—for any of us." and
4x14 YT: "I know full well what would happen should Azure fail. But- but he is my brother. I owe him my life." S: "We get it! I'd do anything to help my friends. But at the cost of the world?" P: "I'm sorry pal, but NOTHING worth that price!"
I'm like, really worried scoob.
#''Oh haha tdp may get into the life of one person VS the life of the world and CHET may definitely happen but at least I'm safe in LMK-''#''-what do you mean one friend isn't worth the cost of the world. WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE WON'T ABANDON THEM WHEN THEY NEED HIM.''#MK IS LITERALLY GOING TO TRADE THE WORLD FOR HIS FRIEND'S LIVES. FUCK ME. I CAN'T ESCAPE ANYTHING#Actually no. NO NO WAIT IT COULD BE WORSE.#It might legitimately come down to destroying MK or destroying the world. Or a choice that seems like those are the only two outcomes#''They will destroy you harbinger of chaos'' OH MAN. WE'RE SO FUCKED.#Nothing is off the table anymore. Azure died painfully on screen. s4 was the worst thing ever. IT'S OVER#Good thing s4 was all about false dichotomies right hahahahahaha#This comes down to: would pigsy sandy and tang really not pay that price for someone they care about.#This isn't about Mei I know SHE would. She'd do literally anything for her friends. BUT THE OTHER THREE.#SANDY CONTRADICTS HIMSELF IN 2x08 AND 4x14. I'M SCARED SCOOB#WHY MUST EXCHANGE AS A THEME BE IN EVERYTHING I LOVE#sorry if this is hard to read/incomprehensible lol#I am just like. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA#lmk#lmk rant#lmk parallels#lego monkie kid#monkie kid
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Did nobody play Cadence of Hyrule??? I can't even find a decent walkthrough or wiki for it, and I can't remember the last time I had that problem with any game, including niche indies
This game is incredible y'all. No game I've played has felt more like the best parts of pre-3D Zelda, including games intentionally meant to and even the Link's Awakening remake. And it manages to do that while being procedurally generated, too. I've been having a gay old time with it
I get the impression that a lot of people bought Cadence of Hyrule and either didn't try it or didn't get very far, then forgot about it. I and a few of my friends did at least, I don't remember if another bigger game came out right after or what. Anyway, if that's you, give it a try, it's fun. And finish Tears of the Kingdom too, the last boss alone is worth it
#pops talks zelda#this isn't sponsored or anything obviously#just a psa since i'm having fun and want y'all to have fun too especially if you already paid for it#i really hope it gets a sequel somehow#there's a lot of potential left to explore in a zelda game like this#especially the dungeons - there's almost no verticality to them like there is in LttP#just stairs like in Z1#having dynamic procedural interactions between floors with tiles falling out and stuff would be incredible#also more elaborate and multi-room puzzles - and give each dungeon more of a unique puzzle style/mechanic#there's some of that but not enough#making keys scarcer and dungeon-specific like LttP would also help make the spaces feel more interesting#i'm glad that at least one game in the time since Z1 has tried the 'keys as a global resource' design again#i think it was interesting and worth it - but for procedural generation i think it undercuts the design#makes the world feel kinda like a continuous blob rather than distinct dungeons and overworld#which isn't as fun#sorry for rambling i'm crossfaded lol <3#WAIT i'm not done i know no one's reading this anymore but i don't care#i also love that there are distinct multi-screen areas like towns and lake hylia and death mountain and just random stretches of grass#but those areas don't really have a lot of variation between playthroughs if any#have random sections/areas within the multi-screen zones!#have different variations of the same zone of different sizes to swap out between seeds!#have towns and zones and even dungeons that only appear on some playthroughs#there are more than enough locations to reference just in BotW alone!#oh man cadence of hyrule 2 botw edition kinda like what they did with hyrule warriors would be so sick#spike chunsoft hire me i'm single ;)
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a friend who'd wait :)
#im posting this very late because i was sort of weary of how it came out and ended up messing w it until it was like 4am oops.#and i have plans tmrw so... oh well! i did my best and ill put it out while i can!#and i tried to make the scene match barnard's colors lol#finn's ocs#finn's art#i know i said id do more sillay stuff with the simpler screentone only style but i had a couple more of these in me#and this is the first piece im making thats like an actual part of the story too rather than just setting stuff for fun#i wanna write something to go with it too but for now ill just sort of briefly explain the context in the tags here:#barnard has a pretty bad case of OCD and his compulsions have made it difficult to make friends in the past#he was never outright bullied or anything but people just didnt really have the patience to deal with it#he has compulsions that include stuff like walking through doors until it feels right and needing things to be perfectly aligned#which in group settings has lead to people having to wait for him to finish his rituals and join them#they might find it tolerable at first but eventually they grow impatient and hes just... not invited to stuff anymore#but juno is a newer member of the guild who ends up frequenting the same library. hes also kinda a little weird#and they dont become fast friends or anything but just sort of naturally spend time in the same place#though they never plan meetups they eventually fall into a routine. around the same time theyd just both be at the library#and read next to each other. and maybe talk a bit. and eventually they end up walking back to the guildhall together#since theyre going to the same place after all. and juno always waits for barnard outside the door#eventually barnard asks if this bothers him. juno kinda just tells him 'of course it does' without any malice or anything. just a statement#barnard is surprised and apologizes and juno says not to. but the next day juno doesnt show up at the usual time.#barnard assumes hes committed somekinda more by bringing it up. he ends up staying there late reading to get his mind off it & not ruminate#but when he leaves juno is in fact still waiting for him down the hall (see pic) having collected a bunch of books literally abt ocd#he fell asleep bc barnard stayed later than expected. and hes an eepy guy generally. and also one very bad at expressing himself#but now barnard gets that juno's 'of course it [bothers me]' had the implication of 'but its worth it' which no friend has previously done.#and from the interaction juno was also able to understand that this isn't something barnard just does for the hell of it so. he studies.#and checks a bunch of stuff out because he thinks it could help his friend too (theres ocd workbooks and such- i remember working w them)#and thats the point where they became more ''friends'' than ''pleasant library acquaintances''#from there on they also do get into juno's problems. whole other bag of worms. but this specific scene is more about bernard from his pov#sorry about when i said briefly explain. i lied </3#but compared to the whole sequence im picturing its brief so shhh
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when i'm arrested for pulling up to an adidas store in nike af1s
#had to add stickers to the photo bc. there were people behind me LOL idk how to take photos#look at my cap! isn't it cool#i had been thinking of buying that exact one for like three months now and turns out my wait was worth it bc it was on sale#idk anything about baseball btw so uhhhh. go new york 😍☝️#lumine.txt
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since you've been playing elden ring, do you have a favorite npc so far?
Haha, my pace at discovering more of Elden Ring is SNAIL slow. And I don't mean moderately fast snail-like mobs in ER, I mean real life snails. xD So, my knowledge is still lacking. But with what I DO know, I think I can pick a favourite already!
This might come off as a surprise, but this...
...is...
...SELLEN!
Honestly, so far I liked her the most! She gives me very strong Imposter Iosefka vibe (in the scenario if after having made enough Emissaries, the Imposter also joined with them to be several small ascended people hiding in a trench coat pretending to be one BIG ascended person…). Whereas she is still, of course, a unique and interesting character on her own! It is just this kind of a female character after knowledge beyond human plane that reminds me.
I am particularly fond of the madman/woman/person characters who want to know the eldrich truths of the universe, no matter how horrifying they are and no matter what taboos they have to break, and what they have to give in exchange. I also can respect the type of 'scientist that is not above trying their own medicine' because, again, she becomes The Orb herself xd Her sassy and blunt attitude is also very appealing for me, she is a confident character with a very certain motivation! I do also enjoy how no matter what scroll she is given, her reaction is that she is familiar with this sorcery, so she is already very educated!
I've posted my analysis how in Bloodborne, Willem and 'original' Choir (from which only Yurie remains) prioritise ascending humanity and leveling with the gods as people, whereas the Choir as it is later tries to TRANSCEND humanity, and will break any taboos, just like Mensis too. In there, I actually sympathise with Willem's side and see Choir as reckless and desperate fools. But in Elden Ring, for some reason, I actually sympathise with the ideas of Sellen (and her teachers, Azur and Lusat) more instead, whereas seeing how Caria family goes about the glintstone teachings as kinda weak. Not REAL researchers. It is very funny and I can't even explain why I am so inconsistent all of a sudden; doesn't help that Rennala herself gives strong Willem and Yurie vibe! Truly, the magic of narration can make EITHER side feel more sympathetic than the other o_o"
Also, I've learned that initially her Witch's Glintsone Crown was named Grana Glintstone Crown, but it was patched out!
I feel like developers initially did want to make Sellen as important as someone who had her own school and the crown made in her likeness was a common wear too, but it never picked up because… well, her line of studies contradicted with Caria's family agenda and restrictions too much? It is one thing to just explore rocks from space, but completely different one to try and BECOME one! But I decided to go with 'they retconned the idea' rather than with 'they obscured the idea'. I mean, how exactly people would follow this "school"? They'd just become rocks lol. It is not really studying the object when you become the object.
I also honest to god cannot recall this particular shade of green glintstone anywhere else - not in an environment, nowhere on Graven Scholars, and there are no spells or staff associated with this color. So I feel like it is artificial and created BY her; would go with theme of her experimenting with turning people into seeds of a star. Heck, maybe this glintstone also had an… organic origin, too. So it cannot be turned into a weapon (unlike staffs of Azur and Lusat that ARE made from existing cosmic material), but only serve as cathalyst for intellect and sorcery of THE caster.
Also I just gotta say, I really appreciate how in these spheres everyone is always having the both horrified and awe-full expression, but she looks really blissful and calm x) She actually gave a realistic, adequate estimate towards how much she wanted to become one with the cosmos xD Lore says that even Azur and Lusat were devastated when they witnessed it, so she is arguably MORE of a madwoman than those two. Love this about her so much.
Honorable mention: so far, Nepheli is my second favorite. Her design definitely beats everyone else's amongst NPCs yet, but also she is just really appealing character. Badass warrior with two axes with great honor and will to go on no matter what, who is also very sensitive and compassionate at heart, is in touch with her vulnerable side, grieving the fallen, strong but not invincible… It is a very good example of how TO write a strong and badass female character; the power is not to be a solid brick that never cries but to be able to connect with one's insecurities and still get back up. Her being heartbroken when her father figure turned on her was very moving, for some reason this way she feels stronger than if she just got up and kicked Gideon's ass and hated him forevermore after that. I just live for this balance of both big muscles but ALSO a big heart.
#elden ring#sorceress sellen#elden ring headcanons#(sort of? it isn't really much it is just me rambling)#(can't wait to discover a minor detail in lore that will flip everything upside down as usual lol)#going in blind with elden ring is a very rewarding experience trust me#but at the same time i feel SO helpless compared to how well-versed I am in BB!#emotions when you find and NPC dead or find a plot twist are so worth it tho xd#for the record: yes i do like seluvis and i can write an essay on this too#but from cold and rational standpoint not he is my favorite#i just appreciate him#i really love it though how in ER there is a line between magic (incantations) and science (glintstone sorcery)#how former scales with faith and latter with intellect#i needed it a lot#granted BB also has cursed pthumerian-esque magic vs COSMOS OF COURSE and eyes#but it is a bit more blurry#by the way if there IS this exact shade of green somewhere else in the game BUT her crown please show me!#i just haven't seen it nor an item!#unless i am right and it IS unique. oh boy....
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not to jerk myself off on y'all's dash lol but i so wish i could post the outline to the story i'm working on. i genuinely think i have something really good on my hands if i can just see it through to the end and polish it up enough. it's scary and fragile yet so enticing
#she bork#like i think it's good. like could be really really good as in publishable. but ofc i would think that lol so i'm not really sure. my#friends said it's good and like i do trust them bc they're intelligent and have been good beta readers for me my whole life but at the same#time what if they don't want to hurt my feelings bc they know i'm really excited about this. idk i also sent the outline to one of my#friends who is a writer and who ik for a fact will not mince words and will LOOK for inconsistencies; not in a mean way but he has a very#keen eye and ear for when something isn't right and he'll tell you when something jumps out at him. so i'm just waiting on his feedback to#tell me if my outline's worth a damn or not lol#novel 2024
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THINGS I CANNOT STOP THINKING ABOUT THAT HAPPENED IN THE FIRST TWO EPISODES OF TBB SEASON 2:
ECHO FACEPLANTING IN THE WATER. this was the absolute BEST opening to a new season I’ve ever seen and I’m going to be thinking about it for the rest of the week 🤣🤣🤣
MY BABY GIRL OMEGA BEING BADASS AND FIGHTING OFF THOSE CRABS YESSSSSSSSSSS \o/
that dadgum smile Hunter gave Omega when they all got back on the Marauder OMFG I’m so in love with him sldkfjgslkdjfhg
PHEE FLIRTING WITH TECH. HOLY. FRICK. Jen Corbett really took one look at the fandom and went “I gotchu fam” ROFL. also ace/aro Tech confirmed yes?? at least aro I guess haha
seriously tho, I do love Phee and I REALLY hope we see her again, she’s amazing. I loved her the second she called out Hunter’s not-so-subtle face tattoo, she’s me fr 😂
them conspiring against Hunter when he was RIGHT THERE WTF GUYS COME ON 🤣
KILLJOY. WE FINALLY HAVE A CID NICKNAME FOR ECHO AND IT’S THE BEST THING EVER 😂👌🏻
the discussion about their futures and Hunter IMMEDIATELY looks at Omega no stop please my heart I love them WAAAAAAAAAAAH 😭💙
Echo confronting Hunter gave me SO much life and I support Echo 100%, while also supporting Hunter 100%, they’re both valid even though they disagree, please boys I love you both so much 🥺
Hunter being sneaky while the rest of them went for the chests was *chef’s kiss*, I love my man 🥰
WHY DID ECHO NOT RESPOND FOR THAT UNCONSCIOUS CLONE HE COULD’VE SAID SOMETHING TO WILCO BUT HE DIDN’T GAAAAAAAAAAAH
completely obsessed with the way the group was split, it mirrored the Salucami episode, and I LOVED that. Omega with the nerd bros was everything, and I love Hunter and Wrecker together as well 💙
I knew someone was gonna get injured inside that crate, but I didn’t expect them to pull a Nemik and nearly paralyze Tech wtfffffffff
speaking of, HOW THE EVER LOVING FRICK WAS THAT MAN ABLE TO WALK. he fractured his ENTIRE femur and was still able to hobble around???? BRO??????
the old man that they met was so sweet, I loved him and I hope they get to see him again someday 🥺
him giving Omega that kaleidoscope KILLED me, my baby girl has no idea what simple toys are, I cry 😭💔
also Tech getting to learn new perspectives about culture was AMAZING, it reminded me of the Raksis episode. they’re learning, guys! \o/
HUNTER AND WRECKER IN DOOKU’S THRONE ROOM, I SCREAMED FR. also Hunter doing his best to get the lift working, babe you’re not the nerdy one of the group, it’s ok 😂
I knew Omega was gonna go for the chest, but I wasn’t expecting a full-on Last Crusade reference??? congrats Echo on having all the best moments of this episode fr haha
Tech was SO badass fighting off those Clones with an entire fractured leg, holy frick dude. Phee knew what she was doing at you earlier LOL
WRECKER BUILDING A CANNON ON THE FLY OUT OF TANK PARTS AAAAAAAAAAAAAA 😍😍😍
the Omega and Echo bonding moment in the Marauder 🥺💙 I wanted them to hug afterwards, but ugh, those two had my entire heart for these episodes 💙💙💙
FREAKING. RAMPART. OMFG I HATE HIM. as if I couldn’t hate him anymore than I already do. him murdering Wilco has officially solidified him as on the same level as Krell and Palpatine for me. HE MUST DIE 😡
ok that’s it, thank you for reading my fangirling✨
#sorry if this isn't as coherent as I promised LOL#I can barely form words honestly#this was everything I could've ever hoped for fr#the writers legit got in my and Ham's heads I swear haha#EXCELLENT start to the new season and SO worth the wait!!#can't wait for next week!!!#\o/#tbb spoilers#star warz
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#ff16 spoilers comin up in tags#(and problematic bullshit lol)#if supposed to be platonic then why are they HEAD OVER HEELS FOR EACH OTHER#why are they READY TO DIE FOR EACH OTHER#why did they have engagement rings (ear cuffs) and a wedding (blessing ceremony).#why do the last few scenes imply that clive finally realizes he's had romantic feelings for joshua this whole time#(which is based on my specific analysis that ignores the writers intending for the moon to = romance;#the moon = jill#the sun = joshua#balcony = budding romance/the liminal space reserved for lovers)#AND WHY DID CLIVE DECIDE A WORLD WITHOUT HIS BROTHER ISN'T WORTH LIVING IN WHEN HE HAS A WHOLE JILL ? WAITING FOR HIM? AT HOME ?#and tons of other people#but like#????????????????????????????????#i just Don't Know.#they try to write a good romance but it ends up being 1) comphet#and 2) completely overshadowed by the brotherly romance.#anyway game sucked. combat shallow. boss fights easy. character writing atrocious. sexist. sidequests bad. slavery B plot tactlessly done.#pretty + smooth to play + fun (sometimes) are the only pros.#also! dion. best character bar none#followed by charon
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I hope one day to own a piece of beautiful backland. I’ll ride at dusk with the coyotes, rise at dawn with the prairie birds, drink my tea from the sap of a cactus out of my favourite ceramics, have an old dog howling the blues on my porch and a wild horse roaming around. I’ll own some tacky art that decorates the place, have encyclopedias in every corner of the house. I’ll find peace there
#I might be 40 years of age when I'll finally get there lol but it will be worth the wait :)#if it isn't somewhere in a warm climate - a swampy dutch farm is fine too
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Hi! I just saw that requests are open, yeah!! I'd like to request an Alastor x fem!Reader where Vox has a crush on her so he sends her a set of different tea flavor as a gift. The problem is that these contain a drug that inhibits the person (thanks, Valentino). Basically, his plan was to wait for her to drink the tea and then show up at the hotel and seduce her so he could have her for himself (my boy thinks she loves him, lol). The problem is that she had graciously offered the tea to Alastor, who drinks it. Vox asks her if she enjoyed the tea she lies saying it was delicious so he immediately shows up at the hotel but ends up finding Alastor who is being super affectionate with her, revealing his true feelings for her. Eventually Alastor attacks Vox as soon as he sees him forcing the other to flee. Fluff and comedy, basically. xD
Alastor x Fem! Reader x Vox | Tea Time Troubles
Warnings ⚠️: Cussing, drugs, controlling and manipulative Vox, out of character Alastor.
"I dunno 'bout this Voxxy" Valentino said, handing him a baggie of the drug, a weak aphrodisiac lining the walls of the bag.
"Don't worry about me Valentino, I'll be fine" Vox reassured him, holding the bag up to his screened face. He smirked deviously as he put his hands behind his back.
"But you tell me all the time 'bout 'public image' and all that shit." Valentino retorted, crossing his lower arms against his stomach.
"Don't you worry your pretty little face about it Honey" Vox sneered, rubbing his cheek in a falsely affectionate way. "Vox is a big boy and can handle himself. I just gotta put this into some tea bags. (Y/n) WILL be MINE."
"Ugh" The moth groaned, taking a puff of his cigar,"She's not even worth it. She hangs out with radio, fossil trash. If she was good shed know who to choose. Besides, I'm better than she is, right?"
"You're wrong." Vox said, his left eye radiating hypnotizing waves out of anger,"(Y/n) is perfect. She's everything, and she will be mine."
Vox's demonic laughter could be heard across the building, sending chills down anyone who heard it's spine.
--------
"Honey!!" (Y/n) exclaimed, holding up the box of tea that arrived at their house,"Your tea shipment came!"
Alastor, who was reading the paper at the kitchen table, looked over to see his dear (Y/n) carrying two large cardboard boxes.
He teleported over, making his shadows place them atop of the counter. His keen eyes narrowed at the second box, seemingly almost identical to the first one.
"How peculiar!" Alastor said, tapping his cane on the second box, almost poking it as if it was a foreign object.
"What's peculiar about it?" The fellow deer demon asked, peering over at the box her partner was so intrigued by.
"I did not order two shipments of tea from the catalogue this month!" He replied, his smile tightening in irritation. Could someone be trying to plant something in this hotel? Trying to hurt any of his friends, his beloved, or him?
"Maybe it's a promo box?" (Y/n) suggested,"I mean, you are a loyal customer of theirs. Maybe they want you to try a new product, I hear that's the new rage."
"Ah" Alastor replied, walking closer to the counter to rip open the second box to be met with a letter and a large box of tea.
"Thank you for your loyalty Mr. Alastor. We're reaching out to our most loyal customers to give this Promo box to! We're asking that you try our newest flavor, a (your favorite flavor) but with a twist! Despite the erratic sounds at night in Hell, this tea should help you fall right asleep! If you enjoy it, please promote so on your beloved Radio Show!"
"I was right!" The doe said, looking up at her partner,"They must've given it to you because they know you're famous and can promote their tea! Very smart people, I wanna try one tomorrow!"
"Tomorrow? Why not today my doe?" Alastor said, looking down at his partner.
"My stomach isn't feeling the best. Charlie's cake wasn't fully cooked through, but I didn't want to be rude and not eat it. Especially because no one else was!"
Alastor chuckled, petting her sensitive ears. "Now now (Y/n), you should've listened to me! I know all!"
"Al..." She said, batting her eyes up at him,"Do you mind trying it for me? I wanna know if it's good, but I don't want to throw up in my sleep!"
"Why should I?" He inquired, smirking down at (Y/n). "It seems like this predicament could've been easily avoided my little doe! Hahaha!"
"Please" She softly asked, smiling at him back.
"I suppose I can try one cup of it." He said, sitting down at the table, fully expecting (Y/n) to make him the cup as he finished reading his paper.
She giggled at him and began to start the kettle. Moments like these can't be replaced, a docile and homey moment between the two of them. (Y/n) loved seeing this side of him. The Alastor side of him, not the Radio Demon.
(Y/n) opened the smaller box that was enclosed in the large one, picking out the first tea bag. She smelled the bag, the fumes of blended herbs wafting in her nostrils. It smelled lovely, she would've to drink one alongside Alastor.
But she held back on picking up another bag, knowing its sleeping effects. (Y/n) really didn't want to throw up while in her sleep, and potentially on Alastor, who would be as knocked out as her.
Sighing, she finished preparing the tea, pouring it in Alastor's favorite teacups, the one (Y/n) gifted him on their second anniversary many years ago.
She walked back over to him, placing the teacup on his saucer, putting the sugar cube in as well.
"Thank you dearest" Alastor said, his eyes skimming over the newspaper,"I shall be in our room in a moment, why don't you go ahead and get in your nightwear?"
"Alrighty" (Y/n) replied, patting the back of Alastor's chair. That was something the two of them did, (Y/n) knew when to touch Alastor and when to not. Still wanting to show him affection, she'll pat an object close to him.
Alastor gave her a soft smile before returning his focus to the newspaper.
The doe walked up the stairs in the hotel to their shared room. She got in her fluffy pajamas, completed each and every step to her skincare routine, and crawled into bed with a book.
The silence was only broken by the occasional turn of a page, this was (Y/n)‘s daily quiet time, as Alastor liked to read the paper before turning in for the night.
This normally is for about an hour, but tonight it was a mere 30 minutes as the door busted open.
The doe yelped, her skittish nature causing her to flinch at the sudden jolt of noise. Her partner flittered into the room before crawling on top of her, his eyes droopy from the affect.
“Hi sugar” He said, burying his face in the crook of her neck. His ears were pressed against his head as he affectionately nuzzled (Y/n). Alastor grabbed her waist and flipped her on top of him, allowing him to bring her closer to his body, her chest atop of his.
“Al-Alastor?!” (Y/n) exclaimed, tensing up. What has gotten into him!? He’s not one to ever make such…bold advances.
“Oh my love” He said, a dreamy lilt in his voice,”you’re just perfection incarnate. Such a lovely little fawn you are.”
Blushing heavily, she let him rest himself on her, snuggling contently. It was rather peaceful, she did not know where this sudden chance of behavior came from, but it certainly wasn’t the worst by far.
(Y/n)’s ears perked up hearing a notification sound ding from her phone. She slowly grabbed it to check what it was.
Alastor was not very keen on allowing this sort of technology in the house, especially knowing Vox is over all of it. So they made a compromise, he’d take out the camera and microphone and she could have the phone.
Seeing it was a message from Vox, she opened it.
Vox: “Hey sweetheart, I pulled a few strings and got a shipment of some new tea of (your favorite flavor) that was being tested. How did you like it baby?”
(Y/n): Oh, it was good, thanks!
Vox: Just good? You sure sweet stuff? Wasn’t it so good you could just kiss the lips off of the person who got it for you?
(Y/n) sighed, shutting her phone off and curling up with her lover.
“I think that’s a yes!” Vox said, throwing his hands in the air ceremoniously. He quickly put on his best bow tie, in hopes it would get taken off by fingers other than his, and made his way towards the Hazbin Hotel.
————
Vox searched through each room until he found the one you and Alastor shared.
He scowled at the door, seeing a heart with the initials scribed on it “(Y/i) + A”
Pathetic. He could give you so much more than that. He could give you the most advanced technological sign known to mankind just for some silly initials, not some shitty hard with nearly illegible handwriting.
He opened the door, his signature smirk dropping as he saw Alastor, his arch nemesis (in Vox’s eyes) peppering small little kisses all over (Y/n)‘s face, making her giggle.
“WHAT THE FUCK?!” Vox yelled, his face was blue-screening.
Alastor took one look at the fellow Overlord and let out a long string of laughter, sitting up as he pulled (Y/n) into his lap.
“Vox?! What are you doing here?!”
“YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE THE ONE TO DRINK THE TEA!! AND THEN YOU’D BE MINE!!”
Alastor hooked a arm around (Y/n)‘s waist, looking at his opponent across the room.
“This is my doe, my love, and we all know if she would’ve drank the tea, she would’ve always chosen me.”
Lets just say, the power around the Pride Ring went out after that comment.
————
Word Count 1,524
#hazbin hotel#hazbin#hazbin hotel spoilers#hazbin hotel x reader#hotel hazbin#hazbin hotel fandom#hazbin hotel fanfiction#hazbin hôtel#alastor fanfiction#hazbin alastor#alastor hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel alastor#alastor x reader#alastor#alastor x doe reader#x reader#fem reader#hazbin vox#vox x reader#the vees#hazbin hotel vees#hazbin hotel vox#the vees x reader#vox#vees#vox hazbin hotel#vivziepop#vivzieverse
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a case of the cuddle bug | logan sargent social media au
pairing: logan sargent x fem!piastri!reader
someone check his temperature, he's got a serious case of the cuddle bug
author's note: thought we could all use some logan content to get us through the weekend
MASTERLIST | TIP JAR
yourusername
liked by oscarpiastri, logansargent and 201,445 others
tagged: logansargent
yourusername: he's not racing :( more time to cuddle :)
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user1: if i find out that that t-shirt was made by them i may need to be shot in the head
yourusername: sorry to be the bearer of bad news 😕
user2: y/n where do we find a logan?
yourusername: date your brother's best friend - the romance books did NOT lie
logansargent: hard to be too sad when you're around
yourusername: awwwww logie bear 🐻 i love youuuuu
logansargent: i love you too come back to the motorhome the hospitality coffee is not worth it
yourusername: not even if i swipe you a cupcake?
logansargent: okay..... maybe ....
alexalbon: i'm sorry buddy, i promise i'll do us proud
yourusername: yOU BETTER 👹
alexalbon: i'm soRRY are you like a gremlin? did someone spill some water?
yourusername: i'm gonna ignore most of that cause gizmo is cute
logansargent: she loves you really alex
alexalbon: do you still love me logie?
logansargent: yes?
alexalbon: I' SORRY I HAVE.A GUILTY CONSCIENCE I DON'T LIKE PEOPLE BEING MAD AT ME
user3: lol mood ^
oscarpiastri: you could support your BELOVED BROTHER NOW (AT HIS (OUR) HOME RACE)
yourusername: ugh i guess
oscarpiastri: you literally said you'd support me any time logan wasn't racing :(
yourusername: unless he can come with me, we'll be supporting you from the williams garage
oscarpiastri: better than nothing i guess
logansargent
liked by oscarpiastri, alexalbon and 459,046 others
tagged: yourusername
logansargent: no way around it, this weekend has been the hardest of my career. however, i'm thankful for alex for picking up a couple points for the team and for having y/n with me to support me this weekend, enjoy the cute picture of her (but not too much)
also i guess congrats to oscar on a podium at his home race 🤷🏻♂️
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user4: hardest weekend ever... here's a pic of my. hot gf :)))))
user5: he's real for that, just reminding us that he's still winning off track
alexalbon: thank you isn't enough logie, love you man, can't wait to see you back in the car next week x
yourusername: you're so lucky you got points otherwise your ass would've been grass xoxo
alexalbon: Y/N I SAID I WAS SORRY PLEASE STOP BEING MEAN YOU'RE MEANT TO BE THE NICE PIASTRI
oscarpiastri: you stole my soon-to-be brother-in-law's car and called me a shit padel player 🖕🏻
alexalbon: why is everyone ganging up on me :(
logansargent: you gotta take it for at least this weekend bro
alexalbon: i guess...
user6: they're so cute, but who is taking these photos of them?
yourusername: oscar makes himself useful sometimes
oscarpiastri: ugh i get NO CREDIT IN THIS FAMILY
logansargent: i at least appreciate it oscar 🫶🏻
oscarpiastri: that's all well and good and i love you, you're my bff but sometimes i don't want to see you be lovely dovey with that hellspawn
fredvesti: let it be known i will no longer be sneaking out with you guys for ice cream on a race weekend, the risk was not worth the third wheeling
logansargent: i paid?
fredvesti: thank the lord you did otherwise i'd raise an official complaint
oscarpiastri
liked by landonorris, alexalbon and 793,209 others
tagged: logansargent & yourusername
oscarpiastri: got a podium at my home race and i'm still not my sister's favourite
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user8: have we considered that y/n and logan have attachment issues?
oscarpiastri: she sat at the window like a woman waiting for her husband at war when he DARED to go home for christmas when we were 16
yourusername: as if you haven't cried over lily 🙄
oscarpiastri: i ACTUALLY don't get to see her very often, i can't separate you and logan
yourusername: LEAVE ME BE
user9: oscar says this as if y/n wasn't crying her eyes out at the podium
user10: and logan wiping her tears to prevent smudging her eyeliner - sigh
logansargent: don't hate the player hate the game
oscarpiastri: what happened to blood being thicker than water
yourusername: you know what else is thicker than water ... 😩😩😩
oscarpiastri: okay you can sTOP RIGHT THERE
landonorris: they're really one being huh?
oscarpiastri: believe me the dinner at mine? they were being TAME
yourusername: okay for the audience we are not that bad, we're just affectionate we aren't like making out in front of everyone
landonorris: .... shame
oscarpiastri: yOU HAVE SHAME THAT'S MY SISTER
logansargent: THAT'S MY GIRLFRIEND
yourusername: AND THAT'S MY BOYFRIEND
landonorris: damn tough crowd
yourusername
liked by oscarpiastri, logansargent and 212,934 others
tagged: logansargent
yourusername: a wee break before my boy is back to knock your socks off
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user11: they're so cute your honour
alexalbon: dating a racing driver and not wearing a seat belt? interesting.
yourusername: dating a professional golfer and still shit at golf? interesting.
lilymunhe: she did get you there alex, soz.
yourusername: also we weren't even driving, that hair acting is all a fan
logansargent: practically a professional photographer now (the model definitely helps, she looks perfect doing anything)
yourusername: hehehheheheheheheheheheheeh
user12: y/n really just gagging alex at every corner
user13: she saw logan wasn't holding a grudge and decided to double down on hers
user14: and we respect that
logansargent: you knock my socks off everyday babe
yourusername: as long as it's only me 😘
logansargent: i've been in love with you since i was 13 👍🏻
yourusername: SNAP🫰
oscarpiastri: once again left out of the photodump
yourusername: you are not 'my boy' that would in fact be inappropraite
oscarpiastri: you couldn't just change the caption?
yourusername: you're not cute enough to be a lannister (cersei and jaime call me)
logansargent: ????
yourusername: *call us 😉
logansargent
liked by lilymunhe, alexalbon and 592,309 others
tagged: yourusername
logansargent: glad to be back in the car this weekend, though if alex could stop terrorising y/n that would be great
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user15: were oscar and y/n's parents in the williams garage?
user16: so oscar wasn't lying about him basically being family already 🥹
alexalbon: i was not TERRORISNG I WAS ENGAGING IN SIBLING LIKE BANTER
oscarpiastri: hold on buster, that's MY sister 🤨
alexalbon: i can't win with any of you three 😭
yourusername: LET'S FUCKING GO EAGLE BOY GOD BLESS AMERICA 🦅🇺🇸
logansargent: i'll let you have this one for once
yourusername: as an aussie that was very hard to say, please appreciate it
logansargent: thank you my little kangaroo?
yourusername: kinda offensive they're scary
logansargent: koala?
yourusername: YOU SAYING I HAVE CHLAMYDIA?
logansargent: well i've ran out of australian animals now :(
user17: thanks for the violent reminder of chlamydia being rife in koalas :(
oscarpiastri: gonna have to beat you this weekend to win back my parents' favour it seems
yourusername: let's be real, they prefer logan over both of us :(
oscarpiastri: true 😔
logansargent: i can't help the southern charm
williamsf1
liked by yourusername, alexalbon and 1,034,672 others
tagged: logansargent
williamsf1: LOGAN POINTS, I REPEAT LOGAN POINTS 😤
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user20: TRUST HIM, I REPEAT TRUST HIM
yourusername: THAT'S MY BOY LET'S FUCKING GO
oscarpiastri: you never get this excited for me?
yourusername: FUCK OFF THIS IS NOT YOUR TURN, IT'S LOGAN'S DAY
maxverstappen1: pretty sure i won the race
yourusername: FUCK OFF ALL OF YOU
user21: y/n crying her eyes out she's so real
user22: based on the faces in the garage i think she may have let everything out lol
user23: as she should
user24: can't expect two people to be attached 24/7 and not be ride or die for each other
logansargent: thanks for the support, glad to pick up some points for the team
yourusername: I'M SO PROUD OF YOU
logansargent: i know you've shouted it in my face since i got back from media
yourusername: you need to know it :(
logansargent: i love you so much
yourusername: i love you even more
user25: the whole piastri family going wild in LOGAN'S garage was not on my 2024 bingo sheet
user26: but it was cute as fuck
yourusername
liked by oscarpiastri, logansargent and 287,045 others
tagged: logansargent
yourusername: we're down bad with a case of the cuddle bug
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user27: the CUDDLE BUG?
user28: i need to be taken out of my misery
logansargent: i've got a high fever, a love fever
oscarpiastri: THAT WAS CORNY AS FUCK
yourusername: i thought it was cute :(
logansargent: and that's what matters
yourusername: exactlyyyyy
oscarpiastri: so fuck me, right?
yourusername: yes!
logansargent: yes!
user29: this whole interaction makes it so obvious oscar was the only boy growing up LOL
alexalbon: i'll concede, you guys are cute
yourusername: we been known
logansargent: no one does it like us
alexalbon: erm alex and lily erasure?
yourusername: lily cute, you not so much
alexalbon: stop being SO PROTECTIVE WHY ARE YOU A GOLDEN RETRIEVER WITH EVERYONE ELSE AND A RABID JACK RUSSELL WITH ME IT WAS JAMES' DECISION GO FOR JAMES' ANKLES
williamsf1: ???
yourusername: i thought it was friendly sibling banter (also james is logie's boss of course i'm not gonna go for his ankles dummy)
logansargent: she's my little guard dog 🫶🏻
yourusername: anything for you, come back to cuddle :(
logansargent: on my way cuddle bug!
fin.
note: i understand why williams made the decision they did, but i've had such a soft spot for logan since he admitted he's lonely in the paddock :( i hope he has a good next race to really prove himself to everyone xx hope you enjoyed! xx
#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#f1 instagram au#f1 x you#f1#f1 social media au#logan sargeant social media au#logan sargeant x you#logan sargeant imagine#logan sargeant x reader#logan sargeant#logan sargent x reader
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Does it every take one stupid, insignificant inconvenience to make you realize just how thin the thread you are hanging on is?
#my video game froze after my best run of the song yet#over two thirds of the way through perfect#minimal misses afterwards even#and then the loading screen#I waited ten fucking minutes#ten whole goddamned minutes just staring at it#until I had no choice but to close the game and reopen it#deleting all of my progress#like it never even fucking happened#life isn't even worth living lol
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eddie who's cynical and grumpy only because he hasn't had proper aftercare. most people just roll over or leave when they're done and those that do stay to cuddle, it's Eddie holding them and never the other way around. He doesn't want to admit that it makes him feel dissatisfied afterwards, like the sex wasn't even worth it, because he got laid, that's the point, why complain? But there's just something... missing (and I figure aftercare wasn't as talked about in the 80s so he isn't really too sure what that something is)
Until a night with reader where they have absolutely mind-blowing sex, parting with heavy breaths and as Eddie's heart rate starts to slow back down to normal again, he's waiting for reader to grab their clothes, roll over on their side, something that breaks the connection and makes his heart drop. But they don't, reaching out a weak hand (because they're sluggish waiting for their soul to return to their body) to rub his arm. A gentle back and forth, which feels nice, but Eddie's suspicious. What is this, why are they doing it, and why does it feel good?
And then, "Can I play with your hair?" (from the muse prompt lol) and he's agreeing with a shrug and when reader starts to card their fingers through his curls and massage his scalp, Eddie melts. It's like a whole brain recalibration. His icy heart getting thawed out just because someone made sure to take care of him too. And if reader wakes up earlier in the morning just to ask how he likes his eggs? Eddie's already decided that he's gotta lock them down.
+18 mdni
cw: p in v sex, cockwarming
It’s you tipping over the edge into orgasm, choking his cock with your velvet walls, soft whine spilling from the back of your throat, that takes Eddie with you.
As he comes, he burrows his face into your neck. Your hands reach for his skull to draw him closer, and he unintentionally bites down a bit too hard on the soft skin of your neck.
You let out a gasp, fingers seizing in his hair, and he’s quick to pull his mouth up, kissing and soothing over the spot he’s left with his teeth.
“Shit, sorry, sweetheart,” he pants, the affection slipping out despite himself.
“It’s’okay,” you mumble out in one word, limbs going to putty, hands extricating themselves from his hair.
Eddie rises to his elbows and moves to gingerly pull out but you stop him, fingers flying up to dig into the meat of his biceps.
“Wait, can you- will you just stay in? For a little bit?”
You’re not kidding, he can tell- you’ve got a wounded puppy look that he’s dying to change. Eddie sinks slowly back into you, rotates his hips a bit so you take less of his weight, and settles his head on your collarbone.
A big, dreamy sigh, from you- like you’re perfectly content because of how close Eddie is.
His eyes flutter shut when you begin tracing light lines with the pads of your fingers over his bare back.
“What’cha doin’?” Eddie murmurs into the skin of your sternum.
Up his spine, circling under the curtain of hair against his neck, down the spine again; looping and rhythmic. Your hands don’t slow as you whisper “Lovin’ on you, weirdo. Hush.”
You can feel the well of his dimples against your skin as he smiles.
“Can I play with your hair?” you ask quietly, and before he’s even finished nodding you’ve got both hands winding into his dark locks.
You start gentle, thumbs at his temples, light touches against his scalp, but when your hands find the roots you give a short but hard tug.
The little flash of pain goes straight to his dick, and he bucks into you with a low groan, half filled-out already.
“You gonna give me another pretty mark to look at?” you purr.
Eddie lifts his head from your chest and grazes his teeth into the opposing side of your neck just below your ear, in tandem with a sharp snap of his hips.
He catches your clit beneath his thumb and grins wicked when you moan, pulling up again to look down at you as he says, “Gimme another one of your pretty orgasms and we’ve got a deal.”
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