the road not taken looks real good now

so i did not finish reading Fire all those weeks ago, but i DID get more books to read so maybe i will ramble about them (stay tuned and find out!)

make me yours. (x)

he’s growing on me like a fungus

(ln8 spoilers) jinshi thinking except for my godly looks i am just average and then his smartass goes and kills around five birds with just one brand. someone whose status is so high that even his name can't be said by anyone except the emperor jinshi branded himself with the crest of the empress vowing loyalty to her assuring her he doesn't wants to take the place of her son. one-upping his "bro" with this who refuses to let him leave the line of succession wouldn't let him become a commoner doesn't wants to let him become a servant to the royal family. only slaves get branded and if this ever got out there will be chaos in the court. gyokuyou tho considers jinshi like a brother and he did swear loyalty to her but if she ever tried to cross his family her clan's brand on his body would be enough to prove her as an adultress which would be bad for her and her clan.

and jinshi did this in front of these two people and maomao so now she is the only one who can see him naked and the emperor cannot order him to marry anyone which was something that was definitely gonna happen had he not done what he did. as a bonus he gets to spend more time with maomao after a long time and he did all this while saying the exact words: empress gyokuyou, your enemy i shall never be in front of maomao reassuring her because she once muttered i don't want to be an enemy to empress gyokuyou and he had heard her but before he could tell her that he had no intention of doing that either he couldn't because of the lishu incident. one of the major reasons maomao hadn't accepted her own feelings for jinshi one of the obstacles he promised to remove for her. even though he doesn't even know that maomao's concerns about her becoming gyokuyou's enemy had to do with his birth secret his true status. that no matter what he is the rightful successor. something jinshi himself isn't even aware of and yet without knowing that he did this to deal with it all in a single way most preferable to him: masochism

it’s finally time for paris n1 YIPEEEEEE!!! it’s our first eras tour date after a mini break AND since the release of the tortured poets department 😱 anything could happen…..so please leave your guesses for surprise songs in the tags / replies and i will be giving all of our winners a shoutout 😊 and psssssst as always if you have any guesses about things she might change up for this leg of tour those guesses are always welcome too

i’m going to guess that she adds a ttpd set to the setlist and that the surprise songs will be paris / so high school mashup and clara bow (??? feels like a mistake to not pull a guess from the anthology but this is what my gut is saying. or fresh out the slammer)

umm. pause. guys. guys. gay tommy has been canon this entire time. what the fuck. like. oh my god. no. like. okay. okay. so. 2x9 (hen begins), sal [deluca] is talking about his girlfriend dragging him to see twilight. he makes a homophobic joke about tommy being team jacob and tommy's like "i don't even know what that means." chimney says "he's insinuating that you're gay" and tommy blows deluca a kiss. fine. whatever. but THEN you skip to 2x12 (chimney begins), and—i stg it's a blink and you miss it moment—tommy and gerrard (racist captain) are having this conversation in the background

tommy: what about that burger place? gerrard: tommy i hate that place. hey wasn't your girlfriend supposed to come and cook us dinner? tommy: uhh. next tuesday. gerrard: promise? tommy: uhh. uh. yes. yeah. i will promise.

and it's like. number one, this sounds like a conversation they've had before. something to the tune of "hey, how come you never bring your girlfriend around" which i can't help but think was intentional considering the members of the old 118 were entirely familiar with deluca's girlfriend gina. but number two, no straight man who has a girlfriend sounds that unsure that they have a fucking girlfriend. it was very much giving "ah yes. this human lady that i love that most definitely exists. absolutely. also i like breasts." and it's just like. ok. what the fuck. like. i don't know if this was the plan all along. i don't think it was. i still maintain buck/eddie were supposed to go canon after the shooting and the powers that be got in the way. but. but. the idea that this canon queer character has been hiding in plain sight (subtext) is just. wild to me. like. i've always headcanoned tommy as gay, mostly because every character he plays seems fruity as hell. but bro. i don't think it's a headcanon anymore. and i don't think it ever has been. what the fuck.

there's also the idea that. like. so i've been watching the begins episodes again trying to figure out what, exactly, tommy's crime against the members of the 118 has been. like. he worked in a -phobic/-cist environment. he was definitely complicit in making hen/chimney feel like outsiders in their workplace yes yes all these things are true. but as far as i can tell, tommy has rarely ever actively been anything except spineless. deluca makes a homophobic joke? tommy laughs. gerrard makes a bunch of sexist and racist comments? tommy looks, but doesn't say anything to encourage (or discourage him). hen gives her monologue? he looks chagrined.

and his complicity would be absolutely shitty and inexcusable if he was just a cishet white man. no questions asked. but if — if — you view his behavior through the lens of the fact that tommy is queer himself? that tommy is, and always has been, a member of a marginalized community who felt it was easier and safer to assimilate than it was to be openly queer and have a target on his back? his behavior becomes a whole hell of a lot more understandable. yes, it's still shitty, but. there's a purpose behind it. and this idea is supported by the fact that, when gerrard leaves (flashing forward to bobby begins again), even before bobby gets there (because we always credit bobby with making the 118 the family it is today), like. the atmosphere is completely different. tommy and hen? are friendly with each other. chimney and tommy? also friendly with each other. which we also know because in 2x14 broken, he calls him up for help. which lends credibility to the idea that the problems tommy had (or thought he had) with henchim were not about them as people but more about whatever manufactured conservative boys club bullshit gerrard fostered.

and it's just like. motherfucker. bitch. what the hell. like. first of all, leave it to 9-1-1 to tell a story like this in the most subtle way possible. like if that was indeed the intended implication, i'm throwing my tv off a bridge immediately. but also. second of all. what is wrong with this show. they're crazy. i want to eat it like a loaf of bread. just shovel it in my mouth because the idea that tommy has been queer all along, that he wasn't brought back just to be a stopgap on buck's queer journey to eddie, but that he's been haunting the edges of the narrative like a gay ghost is sooo like. ohhh. okay. [throws up]. like????? okay. anyway. i'm going to be thinking about this the rest of the day.

“He’s improved his eating habits, he’s reading a book almost weekly to try to improve his brain… I know that sounds silly, but as a captain at 23, that motivates you, that motivates our group… He’s the engine for our team" — Conor Garland Quinn Hughes via the Dropping Gloves podcast

this really is such a minor thing but I genuinely cannot believe that people are still choosing to buy starbucks... its not even good coffee, ignoring all of the serious and actual issues with the company and the many many reasons people are boycotting it, its bad coffee, go to a cafe and get real good shit?? you get the bonus of not being lame for supporting starbucks?? 0 downsides

i think something you have to realise is that there are people who exist alongside you and me, who are so devoid of an identity that they make consumerism into their entire personality. they're the kind of people who line up to buy stanley cups, who will throw out and replace entire wardrobes just to keep up with fashion trends. they'll fight for nothing but their right to remain in their comfortable little consumerist bubbles, and co-opt anti-ableist language to shame you for ever thinking of pointing it out. starbucks is, by a lot of people's measurements, very average coffee. but they've cultivated a global brand identity that people enjoy and that's really the trap.

realizing i have. a lot of untapped trauma potential for clone^2 danny because i just Fully Processed Four Months Late the fact that his parents were capturing and torturing ghosts in the basement before he became Phantom. and the fact that he was on house rest for 2 weeks. during that time period. and he wasn't really leaving the house. he could hear their screaming through the floorboards

*points at clone danny* i can give you suuuuuuch a bad time babe ahaha. i've got two untouched years before you meet damian what fucks you up before then

i think zuko's dry, sarcastic sense of humour is not used enough in fics. ppl always write him as being totally inept at humour (which like. he kind of is... ) but ALSO he's like damn ur gf died and became the moon? rip. yeah sure sokka let's leave appa in the reputable sky bison day care at the notorious prison im sure this will end well. yes aang katara and i will be sure to take a 101 spirituality class while hunting down the killer of katara's mum

I’m a big fan of nines wearing other things besides his cyberlife jacket. Like Gavin. Big fan of nines wearing Gavin.

oh yeah almost forgot. just a little something from yesterday while i was processing the news and trying to cope [spoilers?? ig for the lmk s5 trailer?? i don't know if the trailer counts as spoilers tho honestly its a trailer but we gonna tag as such to be safe] (all my posts about the trailer and the upcoming season will be tagged as lmk s5 spoilers)

#30DAYSOFLUCY for PRIDE 2023 THE ROOKIE (2018) – 1x19 "The Checklist"

dont talk to him before hes had his morning cup of motor oil.