#thinking of making a sequel of this inspired by a shinee song
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그림자 (shadow)
characters: jihoon (woozi), seungcheol (s.coups) + seokmin (dokyeom), chan (dino), joshua, seungkwan, hansol (vernon)
summary: so this is how it feels to fall in love.
word count: 1,486
genre: bxb, dark romance (dead dove: do not eat)
content warnings: stalking, implied violent tendencies
inspiration: 미행 (그림자: shadow) (f(x))
So this is how it feels to fall in love.
You see, I've always been the lonely kid — Lee Jihoon, the outcast. Despite being Lee Seokmin and Lee Chan's cousin, arguably some of the most famous students of the school, my social status in the school is at rock bottom. In fact, I was relentlessly bullied, ridiculed, and given dirty looks by the rest of the student body. For what reason? I didn't know. Even my own cousins avoids me like the plague at school, only interacting with me if our families have dinner together.
It felt like I was locked up in my very own version of hell, unable to escape the daily torture to my body and psyche. I wanted to die, even.
But like a knight in shining armor, you came. I even remember the moment I first met you. It was a normal day, of me being tossed around and bullied by these larger boys in my class out on the hallways where everyone could see. All the kids around me had their phones out, cameras and polished fingers pointed at me as they giggled among themselves. No one made a move to save me from it, lest they incur the wrath of these obese bullies. No one except you.
You weaved through the crowd and stopped one's fist from coming into contact against my body with one hand, the other helping me up and pulling me against your side. "Cut it out, we're in a school not a fucking wrestling ring," you spat, eyebrows furrowed as the bullies weighed their options. As they decided that it wasn't worth it, they left, and the crowd dispersed with even more dismayed whispering and judgmental glances. Daring to peek down, I saw the name behind my savior's face: Choi Seungcheol.
And just like that, a brand new ray of light began to shine down on me.
You were the brightest person in my lonely galaxy. In the vast space of sneers, stares, gossip, and judgment, you kept smiling and treating me with respect and - dare I say - love?
I know it has only been a few days, maybe weeks, since the time that you saved me from the grasp of those bullies, but there is something innately different with the way I feel around you. I feel like I'm opening up, like a blooming flower bud. You make me better, like I'm an actual human instead of a part of the school walls.
I guess you saw something in me too — you let me into your life so easy. It was like you were a book open only for me. I learned about your likes, your dislikes, your schedule, your friends, your family; I learned everything there is to learn about you. I prefer learning about you more than these boring subjects in school that gives me no joy. And I think you like it too, if our date is anything to go by.
One week after, we went on a date! Oh, you don't know how happy I was when we agreed on a date. Unfortunately, you didn't ask me out in public like I envisioned, but I still said yes nonetheless. I woke up super, super early on the day of the date — or maybe I didn't sleep, I really couldn't remember. All I know was that I was super excited. I spent the better part of an hour to pick out the perfect clothes for today, eventually settling on a pair of washed out blue jeans and a gray shirt — casual enough, but not too flashy. Lowkey.
I went early to your house and waited outside for you. You really took your time to prepare, since I had to wait two hours outside for you. And it was definitely not in vain once you stepped out of your house with a bright smile on your face, eyes disappearing into little slits. You look so happy to see me, which made me happy as well! You wore a baby blue button up with blue jeans, which made me feel severely underdressed. No matter.
We began to walk in tandem to the ice cream shop in town, me walking right behind you. We need to stay lowkey, yes yes, so you led the way and I followed, step by step. Once we got to the shop, you ordered a large cup of mint chocolate ice cream. I hated that flavor, but you didn't know it yet. That's fine, I'll like it if it's you. Then we went to the cinema, watched a scary movie. You squeaked and jumped a few times, which made me smile and laugh a little. I wanted to hold your hand to let you know that I am here and give you a bit of comfort, but it would've been too quick, not ideal for a first date in my mind.
And when our date ended, you let me into your house. It was, again, not ideal for a first date, but I let it pass, since you insisted. You even smuggled me into your room, our steps barely making a sound as we climbed the stairs. I felt my insides flutter and turn into mush — I've never been into another boy's house before! But because I trusted you, I followed your lead. Once we got inside your room, you let me sit on the chair in the corner of your room while you went ahead to watch. Interesting how the chair is at the very nook of the room, shadows hiding it from view. I bet when the sun rises, this would be a perfect spot for reading books or doing your hobbies. I envision it already, and it put a smile on my face.
You finished bathing quickly, wearing nothing but a towel around your waist as you raided your closet for nightwear. My cheeks feel like they're flaming, and they might be beet red right now, but I couldn't look away as the towel fell around you and you wiggled into a pair of boxers. You even opted not to wear a shirt of any kind. I watched in rapt attention, memorizing every detail of you that I could. And how could I not? You were the image of perfection, an Adonis made for me and me alone. And the fact that you welcomed me makes it all the more vital for me to memorize everything that is you.
"Good night," you say into the cool night air as you slipped underneath the covers and fall asleep. I held my breath for a bit before whispering a soft good night back, unwilling to wake you from the beginnings of your slumber. Slowly, I inched closer to your sleeping figure. I traced your features with my fingertips — your cat-like eyes, the sharp bridge of your nose, the slight upward lilt of your mouth, and your sharp cheekbones. I ingrained them into my touch and watched you sleep closely.
I saw myself out once the sun began rising, climbing out the window so I won't alert your parents of my presence.
Until our next date, Seungcheol hyung.
"Rumor says you're that weird Jihoon kid's cousin, hyung?" Seungkwan jeered as he poked the senior's side in the cafeteria, Seungcheol in tow behind him. Seokmin felt a full shudder run along his spine at the mention of the older's name, while Chan glared at Seungkwan. "Jeez, don't mention him to me. It's bad enough that he goes to this school of all places," the youngest sighed deeply.
"Why, what's up with Jihoon?" Hansol asked, barely swallowing his mouthful of food. "I saw Cheollie hyung help the kid a few days ago," the younger added, with Seungcheol nodding in agreement. "You shouldn't be good to Jihoon hyung, Seungcheol hyung," Seokmin faced the older male with serious urgency laced in his voice.
"Seokmin’s right, Cheol. Best you stay away from Jihoon," Joshua, Seokmin’s best friend and fellow theater kid, quipped as he sipped his Coke. "Why?" Seungcheol repeated Hansol’s question, mind filling up with worry. Joshua made the group huddle together as Seokmin took a deep breath.
"Jihoon moved here because he has a bunch of TROs filed against him back in Busan," the eldest of the group murmured. "What?!" Seungkwan gasped out loud, earning the stares of some people seated near them. "Shut the fuck up, Kwannie hyung!" Chan whisper-shouted, which turned into a death stare match. Seungcheol ignored the two and focused on the shocking information he learned just now.
"Why the TRO?" he asked. "He's a serial stalker, Cheol. With a high chance of becoming violent, said the police. So I suggest you stay away from him. He's violently obsessive." Seokmin warned the older. "And Seungkwan says you rescued the kid?" Joshua asked, to which Seungcheol nodded.
"Good luck, Choi Seungcheol. You earned yourself a violent shadow."
#seventeen#svt#woozi#lee jihoon#jihoon#choi seungcheol#seungcheol#s.coups#joshua#joshua hong#lee seokmin#dokyeom#lee chan#dino#seungkwan#boo seungkwan#vernon chwe#vernon#hansol#inspired by f(x)'s shadow#thinking of making a sequel of this inspired by a shinee song#nrv
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𝐌𝐄𝐄𝐓 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐁𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐀: 𝐀𝐥𝐞𝐱
@thecutestlittlebunbunfairy
From one to five stars, how would you rate your writing? (No downplaying yourself!)
I give myself a solid 3 stars. I think I can churn out some good stories and smut, but I know I make grammatical errors and sometimes my stories have an awkward flow, but I'm always working to get better.
What do you think makes your writing stand out from other works?
I’ve been told a few times that I have a good story telling ability; so I think that’s where I shine/stand out/ Being able to take a prompt, a song, or just a few quotes and turn it into a full story.
Are there any writers that inspire you?
Unfortunately, a lot of the writers who inspired me have left tumblr and are lost to time. Some of the ones that are still here are angryschnauzer, tsuntsunfangirl, and caffiened-queen. Some new favourites are Navy, hansensgirl, harryspet, tumblin-theworldaway, and of course all my friends in the server <3
What’s the fic you’re most proud of?
It’s so hard to pick just one so i’ll give two! I’m incredibly proud of my Spooptober 2023 collection. It was a tribute and inspired by Hozier’s newest album, and it was the first time I completed a monthly collection! Easter Bunny is definitely a favourite as well; not only a Lee fic (I love our Sheriff so much) but it was a chance to write some real escapist fluff.
Which character(s) do you find easiest to write and which do you find most difficult to write?
Loki, Bucky, and Cap are definitely my easiest characters. They’re my ol’ reliables and I love all three of them.
Who or what do you find yourself writing about most?
The obvious answer is: BUCKY lol. But a lot of my fifcs tgend to be escapism style stories. Bucky coming in to “rescue” the reader in one form or another, even if it’s a dark “rescue”
Tell us about a WIP you’re excited about!
I have 3 long term multi chapter fics planned that I can’t wait to share with everyone (eventually). Two of them are Kylo Ren fics, with one having Kylo Ren as a Director of an art museum, hiring an intern whom Kylo assumes is a guy, but is actually a v cute girl and the other being a Mafia!Kylo with an arranged marriage. The last is a Loki fic with Loki as the CEO of a company who needs a bride to appear good for business purposes.
First fandom you ever wrote for?
Technically the MCU. The first ever fic I wrote was a Tom Hiddleston fic.
Any guilty pleasure trope(s)?
I admit I don’t really believe in “guilty” pleasures; pleasures should be enjoyed! But man am I a sucker for my dub/non-con, kidnapping, and yandere stories!
A trope you’ll never, ever write for.
I try to not to say “never” because i’m always open to inspiration, but i don’t see myself ever writing anything with pregnancy/babies
Wildest fic you’ve ever written?
I wrote this INSANE fic called “When Magic Meets Insanity” which is a threesome between Loki, Reader, and Jerome Valeska from Gotham. It’s crack to hell and is still available to read on my AO3.
Favorite pairing to write for? (platonic or romantic!)
Stucky. Always. They are my OTP and I love how fun it is to explore their relationship. Especially throwing Sam into the mix.
Do you listen to anything while you write?
It mostly depends on what/who i’m writing, but yes! For example, I’ll listen to oldies stuff when I'm writing for Lee, and I have this GREAT Asgardian library ambience for writing Loki.
One-shots or multi-chaptered works?
One-shots.
Have you ever daydreamed about side adventures/spin-offs from your fic? Tell us about them!
Not really, I sometimes imagine what happens after, but once a fic is done, I tend to just put it on a shelf and leave it. It’s why I hardly write sequels
Is there anything you’ve wanted to write, but you’ve been too scared to try?
I long to write some really good multi-chaptered works, but I struggle with writing long term conflict and i’m worried they’ll be awkward and won’t read well.
What’s the nicest comment you’ve ever received?
The best comment I’ve ever gotten was on my fic Sunlight (Sun God!Steve) from tumblin-theworldaway. She wrote a big huge comment on the fic and it was like the first thing I saw on a monday morning and I needed a good comment.
Have you ever gone outside of your comfort zone for a fic? How did it turn out?
I won’t say “comfort zone” but I wrote my first ever Monster Fucker fic not too long ago, “By Land or By Sea” about Sea Monster!Loki and it was defintely new and interesting to write!
Tooth-rotting fluff or merciless angst?
Fluff, always. I’m always a sucker for happy endings (even dark happy endings lol)
Do you have any OCs? Tell us about them!
Sort of. I have a beauty and the beast style novel planned. The beast is a rich lobbyist for oil industries. And the beauty is an indigenous woman who meets the beast at a cabin in the woods. It’s still heavily in development and i’m not sure when it’ll come to fruition.
If you could enter the universe of any one of your fics, which would it be and why?
“Teddy Bears” for sure. With slightly dark Bucky and Steve kidnapping me (is it kidnapping if i’m willing?? lol) and telling me I don’t have to work and they’ll take care of me? I’d be there in a heartbeat.
Is there anything you wish your audience knew about your writing or writing process?
I always write stoned lol. I get a ton of creativity and inspiration from weed and it helps make the ideas flow. It just can take a while to interpret all my stoned ramblings sometimes.
Copy and paste an excerpt you’re particularly fond of.
This is from my most recently published fic, the last fic in my Spooptober Collection, “To Someone from a Warmer Climate. The fic is about a witch!reader who is visited by a humble sheriff, Lee Bodecker. But he is more than meets the eye.
“Mmmmm…damn…That’s the best cup of coffee I’ve ever had. And I just love the taste of the forgetfulness potion you added.” Your heart dropped into your stomach.
“What did you say?” He didn’t answer, only leaning back in his chair. He blinked and where crystal blue eyes had seemed to make him handsome and rakish; now were two inky black pits. He blinked again and his eyes were human again, but now his irises were crimson red.
You took a deep breath, trying to steady yourself. You’d dealt with a few lower-level demons in your travels, but never someone who you could walk through your house’s defenses so easily. Usually, any malevolent force was neutralized before it even touched your house. But he…he was something darker.
“I’d heard about a pretty witch living out here in the woods.” Lee continued. “Thought it was just another one of them dippy mortals wearing peace signs. But then that little old lady came in, bringing some brownies she said you’d made. And when I tasted them, I knew for sure. There was a real little witch somewhere in town.
“Though it took me a while to find ya, darling. All them wards and runes…you’ve kept yourself pretty well hidden. But when that same sweet little old lady called in, worried about her friend in the woods, I knew I’d found you and here you are. Hidden away from the world, cooking up spells your nose buried in a mountain of books. All that defensive magic and you opened the front door for me and invited me in. Silly girl.” His eyes raked over your body, studying you.
Ramble about any fic-related thing you want!
Fanfiction writing has been some of the most fun writing I've ever had. I’ve loved writing for my whole life but sometimes it’s a struggle to write and create an entire cast/world. Fanfiction gives a helping hand to an entire gallery of characters with infinite possibilities. Not to mention the fact that based on “What if” logic, there is a multiverse out there where these fics really happen lol. I look forward to even more writing in the future, both fanfic and original.
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Possible future stuff (just a snippet ;) ):
Dokutaro: ‘No…no! Impossible! How is my power core destroyed?!’
Kieran: Wait, his colour’s weird, this means, maybe we have a chance now? If so, then…
Ogerpon: *angrily growls while bringing out her cudgel*
Kieran: *puts his hand, blocking Ogerpon* *with rage* No,I’ll take care of this.
*Grabs Dokutaro’s neck while the True Finale starts*
Kieran:
Who are you…
To think that could prevail?
For all the sins you’ve done,
You'll fall on your face and FAIL!!!!
Now then!
And In The Final hour our HOPE STILL SHINES!!
BLINDING THE DARKEST OF NIGHTS…
IN THE FINAL…
FIGHT!!
AND THERE’S NO WAY THAT YOU’LL EVER BEAT US!!!
YES, WE’RE STILL IN OUR PRIME!
YOUR OWN END IS NIGH,
IT’S TIME WE FLY HIGH!!
You’ll never harm anyone again
Like the runt you were,
You may have possessed me and
and made me harm my family!
But when YOU harm my friends?!
You're asking for a Kieran smacking!
One single KO punch,
Will send you sorry runt a-packing!
*Finally, in a fit of rage, Kieran mustered up all his strength, and punched Dokutaro, sending him flying in the air. Finally the second attack is over, but it truly was a Grand Finale*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
(v) PV! Pecharunt: And that’s how I got my ass handed by my Kieran.
@tealmaskmybeloved Pecharunt: *grimaced* sheesh, I hope you’re alright.
S&S Dipplins Pecharunt: Now you’re making me feel that I got off easy…
Azure Dive Pecharunt: *curious* Really? What happened?
S&S Dipplins Pecharunt: Well, let’s just say my Kieran was AN ABSOLUTE SIMP, somehow, his simping was able to shrug off my possession for a short while, but it’s really tiring, ugh, I’m SO TIRED…*internally screaming*
Azure Dive Pecharunt: ohhhh, that sounds really annoying to deal with.
(so, ANOTHER IDEA, AND A SNIPPET OF THE PECHAS. So, you said most of your stuff is inspired by BIS, so another lyrical stuff by Juno Songs (credits to him) for Kieran in the Key Change segment. Also, I changed a few things to fit the context)
(and this could be a sequel’s ending since, the final battle is sort of discussed already)
(so maybe?)
(Also, opportunity for the Pechas to interact :), also if S&S Dipplins Pecharunt confusing you, you can go to @dipplinduo and see the asks, he’s the author of the fanfic)
I LOVE THIS IDEA! I'M FINALLY GETTING TO ANSWER BUT I RLLY NEED TO LISTEN TO THIS SONG! I'VE BEEN Listening to the actual BIS soundtrack, and smth funny I've been thinkin abt is a mario-rpg style thing of Project Venus.
So, you know how in BIS the music changes depending on whether you are bowser or the brothers? Esp inside bowser? I wanna make themes based off the inside bowser themes for Kitakami, BB Academy, Area Zero, etc for PV!Kieran, since his POV is technically warped. Like when we first meet him, it's obvs gonna be normal, but it slowly but surely settles in as time goes on because I wanna say there's a side episode of him training (Like Bowser Jrs Journey was a side episode)
I'd love for everyone's Pechas to interact! I'm a bit intimidated even tho I'm mutuals with both dipplinduo (I believe) and I am definitely mutuals with tealmaskmybeloved!
However, I don't think I've heard much abt Azure Dive, but I hella love the name 👀
I wanna find out more abt them, though! I don't see them on my tl much and I get busy, but I'd love if you told me a buncha stuff, if you'd like to! You're definitely not obligated to, by any means!
Also, I'm very sure that PV!Pecha wpuld get the walloping if a lifetime for sure! Maybe not just by Kieran himself, but by Kieran's ancestor, too 😭
In fact, I think that's what I want PVs Mochi Mayhem to be about! Uncovering Pecharunt and Kieran and Carmine's ancestry with Eustace (The Mask Maker) and the sealed curse that Pecharunt has him under! Ooooghh, givin me so many ideas...
#pokemon#pokeblr#pokeblogging#pokemon sv#pokemon dlc#kieran pokemon#pokemon violet#rival kieran#pokemon kieran#mochi mayhem#pecharunt#pokemon dokutaro#dokutaro#project venus au#project venus mystery of the indigo disk#project venus: mystery of the indigo disk#project venus#the indigo disk#mario rpg#alphadream#pokemon ramble#kitakami#bowsers inside story#the grand finale
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"You're My Angel"
for @incidentale (Thank you so much for that ask and the inspiration ❤🌻 )
Words: 1323
(Ao3 link in reblog)
Characters: Simon (Dinner in America 2020), Patty (Dinner in America 2020)
Additional Tags: Fluff, Everything is Beautiful and Nothing Hurts, They love each other so much, and I love THEM so much oh God we NEED a sequel, Also we need more fanfictions wtf, inspired by a song
“You know that I’m no angel, right?” Simon half-teases with an arched brow after she is done singing, wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her close on the bed.
“You’re a fucking angel, you’re my angel. All mine, mine, mine…” she sweetly sings into his ear this time. He can feel her smile against his ear and fuck him if it doesn’t make his heart race and ache like crazy.
Just like every time.
He decides that he’ll die a happy man if he can feel her smile like this every day.
“I’m no angel,” he insists.
“You are. To me. You saved me. You can’t deny that. No matter what you do and say, you’ll be always my angel,” Patty says as she nuzzles his neck and that’s what breaks him finally because fuck, he was no one's, and I mean no one's favourite person before: let alone an angel.
Sure, he had a few loyal fans maybe: fans who thought he was amazing and cool, but what the fuck did they know? They only knew John Q. And they sure didn’t think he was an angel. Not that he wanted them to. He knew he was no angel, and he wasn’t aiming for being seen as one by anyone. That wouldn’t be very punk of him, right? Right. Fuck angels, anyway.
Simon is not sure who saved who, actually, so he just lets out a dry chuckle and swallows the lump in his throat as the tears he was holding back gently roll down his cheeks.
It’s a weird and holy feeling; being loved oh so much.
He doesn’t think he has been ever loved like this before; so truly, madly and deeply. Yeah he is quoting Savage Garden okay, sue him. Not even by his parents who were supposed to love him. Because that’s what parents did, he used to think. They would love and accept their kid. Well, apparently that was such bullshit.
Patty, on the other hand, loved him without trying to change him: she accepted him as a whole, loved him as a whole.
Being loved by her was a miracle. She was a miracle in his eyes.
Patty, Patty, Patty…
Kind, funny, sweet, sexy, patient, honest, and just his-kind-of-crazy.
They were living together in their small but cozy apartment for the past seven months and nine days, and yet she never ceased to amaze him every single day.
He buries his nose in her soft hair and sighs.
“I’m sure you would figure something out by yourself to save yourself from that pathetic shit that you used to call ‘life’, eventually. You are punk as fuck and smart as hell, after all. I just… made the process go faster. Diamonds don’t stay hidden all their lives. They can’t. They find a way to shine sooner or later somehow.”
“I don’t remember allowing you to make this about me,” she complains and slightly pulls herself away to look at him. Seeing his tears makes her frown, but she doesn’t mention it or asks if he is okay. She leans her forehead against Simon’s instead, her thump caressing the side of his cheek as he closes his eyes in content. “But hey, at least you didn’t deny that you’re mine.”
“I don’t remember askin' for permission. Everything is about you for me now.”
‘There is no me without you anymore,’ he thinks.
“Is that so?”
“Hell yeah,” he nods. When he opens his eyes, Patty looks at him like he has given her the whole wide world. “You see that streetlight?” He points at the streetlight across the street from their window. “Even that is about you,” he whispers. “It helps me to see you better when you’re sleeping. Big fan of that one, I swear. Beautiful warm yellow. Maybe I should write a song about it later. And of fucking course I’m yours, music girlfriend. Always. Hell, I was yours before you even knew it.”
“Ew, babe, you’re sooo cheesy right now. You’re like, as cheesy as mac and cheese, even.”
That makes Simon laugh. Teach Patty a word and voilà, just watch her start using it all the time.
“I’m just fuckin' with you,” she laughs back. “And I’m yours, too, angel,” she adds as she starts pressing soft kisses on his body: first on his naked chest and then his collarbone, shoulder and jaw.
“This better not become a thing,” feeling his cheek heat a little, he mumbles, his hands wandering up and down her sides.
“What? Me calling you ‘angel’? How about… ‘Punk Angel’ ‘Angel of Punk? But nah, I think I love calling you just ‘angel’ more. Sorry not sorry,” she says with a cocky smile that suits her so much that Simon falls in love with her all over again.
He is utterly captivated by her and her affection.
“Did I ever tell you that your voice is as deep as an abyss that I wouldn’t mind falling into for the rest of my life, angel?”
That sounds like a promise somehow and Simon’s heart suddenly skips a beat. He hopes and wishes it’s a promise because he would give everything for Patty to stay by his side for the rest of his life.
It makes him feel selfish to want her that much even when he has her now, though. He cannot help but feel like one day she will realize she can do better than him and then decide to leave his sorry ass because God knows she deserves better.
Even imagining that makes him feel like dying so he tells his brain to stop thinking such things and focus on the moment they are in instead.
“And you call me cheesy. Oh God, you’re ridiculous.”
“Goddess, you mean, am I right or am I right?”
“Yeah yeah, whatever you say, you adorable and sexy Punk Goddess.”
Satisfied with his answer, she locks their lips together finally. Simon kisses her back like her lips are oxygen and he is a dying astronaut.
“Don’t be surprised if I steal your idea about that The Streetlight song,” Patty lets him know when they pull away eventually. “I think I can pull it off before Saturday and sing it for you at my concert.”
“I have no doubt you could,” holding her close, he yawns and agrees as she lies on his chest.
“Now hush, I gotta watch you sleep while the streetlight accompanies me.”
“Whaa— You creep.”
“What can I say? You’re my inspiration, angel. And don’t act like I don’t catch you watching me sleep nearly every morning.”
“Who? Me? You can prove nothing,” he denies.
“Uh-huh, sure. Sweet dreams.”
“Being with you is like a sweet dream anyway, I need nothing else.”
And with that, he let himself start falling into the warm embrace of sleep. At this point he cannot even remember how he used to sleep alone before he met her.
“He sleeps soundly by her side, without a care,
While she traces his features with a loving stare.
In the quiet of the night, they're alone,
With the streetlight as their silent chaperone,” just when he is about to fall asleep, he vaguely hears Patty singing quietly.
“Sweet streetlight, keep shining bright
As I watch my angel through the night.
Guide him with your gentle light,
In this moment, everything feels right.”
“Wow, you’re fast. That terribly sounds like a gospel for some reason though,” he makes an honest comment, ignoring the way how it made him feel warm inside despite it really sounding like a gospel.
“Shh, I’m just warming up, ignore it. Sleep.”
Simon chuckles and does as he is told after planting a kiss on her forehead and whispering: “I love you.”
“I love you, too, my angel,” is the last thing he hears before falling asleep with a slight smile on his face.
He thinks he can get used to that.
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The Phantom | Morpheus x F! Reader
Warning: Sexual content, with a splash of angst
Requested by: Anon
Notes: Thank you anon, for the request. I love Phantom of the Opera <3 I’m following both the book and movie for the inspiration of this one-shot. Also, it may not perfectly follow the material, because it’s an inspiration and not a direct copy. Yes, I do reference the sequel, “Phantom of Manhattan” in the end. Sue me, jk please don’t.
If you'd like to be a part of “The Sandman” tag list, just ask me! Requests are open.
Word count: 4.6k
Masterlist
The bright sunlight glistered against your eyes as it peeked through your curtains. Slowly, your eyes began to open with your hand blocking the daylight. You began to stretch your body on the bed and sighed. Your joints cracked with slight soreness in your muscles lingering from last night's rehearsal. Everyone was anxious about the grand opening of Hannibal, especially after it was revealed you would sing an opera solo. Weeks of endless rehearsals were finally going to pay off after the prima donna decided to quit the production due to this mysterious opera ghost, who she was afraid of. Contrary to popular belief, you were never scared of the opera ghost; instead, you wholeheartedly believed the opera ghost was your angel of music. After all, your father promised to send you an angel of music after he passed away. While performing your rehearsal of the aria last night, you could see your angel of music’s silhouette in the corner of your eye from box five. You had yearned for your angel of music to reveal themselves, but that moment never came. If only, you knew that day would come soon.
“(Y/N), is everything alright?” asked Lucienne, as she was helping with your hair, “You seemed quiet.” You looked in the mirror to see her brushing the tangles out of your hair; however, you remained silent. Lucienne sighed and began to style your hair with the bright crystals pinned to your hair. “You know, I heard someone special was coming over to attend tonight,” Lucienne explained while finishing up your hairstyle, “Remember Corin?” You smiled softly when she said the name, Corin. The man with striking blonde hair and the bluest eyes would make anyone swoon. Your childhood sweetheart, Corin, became the sponsor of the opera house, however, you were always afraid to acknowledge him because if you were to recognize him then your angel of music would disappear. Regardless, your love for Corin never disappeared, despite haven’t seen each other in decades. “I do remember him, and it’s nice to know he’s attending the opening performance of Hannibal.” You replied while looking at yourself in the mirror again. Lucienne helped you up, as you slipped into the white dress and began to lace your corset. A knock echoed from your door with someone saying you had three minutes left before you had to go backstage. Lucienne sighed and made you face her, “You’re going to do wonderful, I can promise you that.” Lucienne stated before kissing your forehead. A slight smile appeared on your face, as Lucienne held your hand to take you behind the stage.
Your stomach began to twist and turn, and your knees quivered from nervousness. Your breathing turned shallow as you could feel the corset tighten around your waist, with your mind swirling. What if your performance doesn’t please your angel of music? What if your angel of music doesn’t come to attend your performance? A mental battle that began to hold a tight grasp on your brain, until a stagehand snapped you out of it and guided you to the stage. Claps from the audience filled your ears, as the lights began to shine against your dress and hairpins. The music for the aria, “Think of Me” began to play, and you locked eyes with the conductor, to which the conductor nodded their head. You closed your eyes and began to sing the opening of the song. “Think of me…Think of me fondly, when we’ve said goodbye,” you sang gently while opening your eyes again, “Remember me, once in a while. Please promise me you'll try.” You could feel your heart beating fast; however, you knew you had to stay strong for your angel of music. Your face began to soften as you continued to sing to the crowd, and your voice echoed from the stage to the house. Your voice never quivered; instead, you began to gain more confidence as the song continued. As you were singing, Corin smiled at the sight of you and whispered to himself, “Can it be, can it be (Y/N)?” He rose from his seat and began to applaud. Corin left his seat to meet you in your room and began to whisper to himself, “Long ago, it seems, so long ago. How young and innocent we were. She may not remember me, but I remember her.”
As the aria was ending, you took a deep breath before completing the song with your arpeggio. You closed your eyes as you hit the high notes of the song, to be met with the audience raising from their seats and clapping. Your heart began to beat faster from the adrenaline from performing, and you just smiled at them. Quickly, you took a short bow before leaving the stage to be greeted with your co-stars’ smiles and clapping. Lucienne appeared in front of you and grabbed your hand to guide you to your room. “You did wonderful, my dear,” Lucienne said as she opened the door for you. You walked over to your vanity filled with perfumes and makeup products to see a single red rose tied with a black ribbon bow in the middle. Your fingers hovered over the flower, as you pulled your chair to sit down. Lucienne left the room, and you could hear people shouting your name and a glimpse of men holding bouquets for you. You softly smiled as you heard Lucienne scolding them to leave you alone, before closing the door behind her. You shifted your attention to the rose and held it between your fingers. The silk ribbon was soft to the touch, and the pearl was glistering underneath the lights of your room. After a moment of silence, you heard a knock on your door, and before you could stand up, the door opened to reveal Corin. You smiled at the sight of him as he began to say, “Little Lotte let her mind wander. Little Lotte thought, “Am I fonder of dolls? Or of goblins or shoes?”’ You rose from your chair to hug him, and replied, “Father playing the violin. As we read to each other the dark stories of the North.”
“No, “What I love best,” Lotte said “Is when I'm asleep in my bed,” he whispered as you pulled away from the hug. “You sang like an angel, today (Y/N).” You walked over to your vanity again with Corin following behind you. “My father told me, he would send me an angel of music when he’s gone. He’s gone, Corin.” You whispered while looking at Corin, who was smiling at you. “I’ve been visited by the angel.” Corin laughed at your response and said, “No doubt, about it. You should change, I’m taking you to dinner.” You shook your head and rose from your chair. “I shouldn’t, the angel of music is strict.” Corin turned around and waved away before saying you should be ready in two minutes. You called out his name, but it was worthless as he closed the door, ignoring your pleas.
Sighing, you turned around to remove your dress and changed into a white cotton long-sleeve pajama dress with a white silk robe. As you were tying the robe, the lights from your room shut off. “Insolent boy, this slave of fashion! Basking in your glory.” a voice boomed inside your room, and you turned around to search for this voice, “This brave young suitor is sharing in my triumph!” You looked around your room and realized your angel was angry. Your heart began to beat quickly, and as your hands trembled by your side, you replied, “Angel, I hear you! Speak, I listen, stay by my side, guide me. Angel, my soul was weak. Forgive me, enter at last, master.” The room turned silent, until the voice boomed once more, “Flattering child, you shall know me. See why in the shadow I hide, look at your face in the mirror. I am there inside!” You looked in your standing mirror to see a tall pale man wearing a black outfit with a distinct white mask covering half of his face. “Angel of Music. My guide and guardian, please grant me your glory. No need to hide, come to me, strange angel.” You pleaded as you walked closer to the mirror. His hand went through the mirror as he stated, “I am your angel of music, come to me.” Corin had returned to get you, just to hear the man’s voice. He could hear the man pleading for you to enter through the mirror. Corin began to bang on the door and called out your name. However, you ignored Corin and focused on the man in front of you. With no hesitation, you placed your hand on top of his. The man pulled you through the mirror and began to guide you through the hallway that had arms holding candles to light your way. The light from the candles makes the appearance of your angel more visible. His slicked hair was black as coal; his skin was white as the snow, and his lips were red as roses. The mask covered the left side of his face, piquing your interest. “In sleep, you sang to me! In dreams, you came. You’re the voice that calls to me.” You said to him, as he was guiding you along the hallway, “Am I dreaming? For now, I find the Phantom of the Opera is here.”
“Talk once again with me, our strange duet. My power over you grows stronger yet, and though you turn from me, to look behind. The phantom is here.” The man spoke, before guiding you down the stone stairs leading down to the dungeon. “Those who have seen your face draw back in fear.” You said once more, as he led you to a boat. Carefully, he helped you sit on the boat as he led the boat. “It's me they hear, the phantom of the opera.” He said as you looked up to see him glancing down at you. “Come with me, my angel of music.” The boat slithered through the river, leading to a spiked gate that rose. Looking around the room, the river led to a slab of floor that was filled with covered mirrors placed in a specific order, candles, and a musical organ. He stopped the boat and got down to pick you up to place you on dry land. You didn’t say anything to him; instead, you began to look around from where you were standing. This was his underground lair.
“The night-time sharpens and heightens each of your sensations. The darkness stirs and wakes the imagination. Silently, your senses abandon their defenses.” The man said as he walked up the small steps the floor had, removing his cape and motioning you to follow him. “Slowly, gently, night unfurls its splendor. You could grasp it, and sense it. Turn your face away from the garish light of day; turn your thoughts away from cold, unfeeling light.” He grabbed your arm to spin you and grabbed your waist. His gloved hands slowly crept up your soft curves, as your head lay against his shoulder. “Close your eyes and surrender to your darkest dreams! Purge your thoughts of the life you knew before.” He whispered against your ear, his lips slowly hovering against your skin. “Close your eyes, and you'll live as you've never lived before. Let your fantasies unwind, in this darkness which you know you cannot fight.” You closed your eyes, as you allowed him to lower your robe. “Let your mind start a journey through a strange new world! Leave all thoughts of the world you knew before. Let your soul take you where you long to be. Only then can you belong to me.” He commanded as he turned you around, face to face, and you looked into his eyes. “Touch me, and trust me to savor each sensation! Let the dream begin; let your darker side give in. You alone can make my song take flight and help me make the music of the night.” Your left hand slowly touched his cheek, as you stared into each other's eyes. What does he mean, music of the night? Your eyes took in every facial feature he had, his sharp nose, sharp jaw, and the lingering touch of his hands against your waist. However, it was his eyes that captured you the most, his pale blue eyes shining from the candlelight nearby. The eyes that held memories, told stories, and most of all, showed his true intentions.
“Music of the night?” You asked as his eyes lowered, his fingers gazed up and down your back as he placed his forehead against yours. “Do you not want to make your angel of music happy?” He whispered, before laying his head against your shoulder. “Submit to your inner desires, my angel. Let us make the music of the night.” His hands cradled your face; you fixed your gaze on his lips as he tilted his face to lean forward. Closing your eyes, your lips touched his lips, and your hands landed on his shoulders. His hands slowly moved away from your face to place them on your hips; he pulled you closer to him, deepening the kiss. His hands move to caress your butt, firmly grasping them. One of his hands moves underneath your thigh to hitch it against his hip; you broke the kiss and looked up at him in awe. With no struggle, he picked you up and took you to his bedroom. It was like a tunnel from the lair, the walls, and floors made of rock; but there lay a black wooden bed frame in the shape of a peacock. As if you were a doll, he laid you against the red velvet sheets and got on top of you. Your heart began to race, and your knees were wrapped around his hips. His right hand grabbed your wrists to pin them over your head, while his left hand began to swirl around your chest, playing with the buttons. His eyes looked up into yours, then he asked, “May I?” You took a shallow breath, before nodding yes.
“I want verbal consent.” He said in a cold tone. You cleared your throat and tried to find your voice, but after witnessing everything, it was hard. His hand tightened its grip against your wrist, and you whimpered, “Yes, you may. Please, my angel of music, please me, and I will please you.” His lips twitched a smile, as his left hand began to slowly button the front of your pajama dress. After the four buttons were opened, he raised his left hand to remove the glove with his teeth before lowering his left hand again. His soft hands slowly pushed away the fabric to reveal your breasts; his thin fingers swirled around them, as your breath sharpened. His eyes were focused on them, and then he lowered to kiss them softly. Biting your lip, your back arched as his lips attached to your nipple to lick them gently. Your voice began to crack when you felt his teeth slowly graze it, before pulling it. He let go, and his left hand began to lower down to your crotch to hike your dress. His fingers reached over to remove your undergarment and slid it down to your ankles. The cold air breeze against your skin, making you shiver; he looked at you and kissed your forehead. He let go of your wrists, but you stayed still, not knowing what to do next. He removed his other glove with his teeth, removed his coat, and began to unbutton his shirt. You saw minor scars from his chest but were too scared to comment on them. You didn’t want to upset him, in any way. His pale skin was bright from the light surrounding the room, and you could see his lean physique. Your eyes lowered to his pants but looked up when you heard a soft chuckle.
He leaned forward again to kiss your neck, his plump lips fluttering around to leave short kisses. Your hands were still stuck in position, making him smile; his hands grabbed your wrists, and he whispered, “You can touch me, it’s fine.” You nodded, and your hands began to touch his arms. You giggled softly as his lips left short kisses, then his lips began to lower to kiss your collarbone. His tongue swirled around the bone and left kisses, while his right hand shifted to hike your dress again. You gasped, as you felt his fingers circle your slit; you could feel his fingers going up and down, creating this unusual sensation. You tried to hold back your whimpers, until he said, “Do not hold back, my angel.” With his permission, you gasped and whimpered as he slowly entered a finger inside. Your hands grabbed the soft red velvet sheets, as the first finger curled inside you, making your eyes close. With caution, you felt another finger enter; you choked on your whimper and let out a loud mewl. He whispered a shush, as you could feel the pad of his thumb touch your nub, your legs consciously wrapped themselves tighter around his waist, and you couldn’t stop yourself from rocking your hips against his hand. He stopped kissing your collarbone, and instead laid his head against your chest to enjoy your sweet noises. Your left hand raked through his hair, as your right hand continued to grab the bed sheets. You could feel his fingers going in and out of you, creating a lewd sound as your juices began to leak.
“I…I feel…” You managed to breathe out, “M-my angel…” He shushed you again and continued to play around with your crotch. There was a feeling in the pit of your stomach that began to form, and you began to tighten around his fingers. Your legs began to move around with no control, your breathing began to get shallow, and you looked to your right to see him staring at you with his eyes slowly blinking. The feeling began to get stronger, and you couldn’t control the lewd noises you were making. Before you were able to hit the climax, he removed his fingers and placed them against your thighs. You were struggling to breathe from what was happening, and you looked at him with wide eyes. “W-why?” You choked out, your body was slowly shaking from what you were experiencing, and you wanted to feel it again. He raised himself and began to unbutton his pants, your eyes fixated on his crotch. You could see a clear tent from his pants. Could it be? Were you about to lose yourself to your angel of music? “I want us to give into our inner desires.” He said in a soothing tone, “Together, as one.” As his hands pushed down his pants, you looked to see his member, making you gasp. Your blood began to rush to your cheeks as he leaned forward to touch your cheek and caress it.
He grabbed your hips to pull you closer to him; your eyes widened as you felt him against your crotch. Your arms were on each side of your head, as he leaned forward to place his left hand next to your head, and placed his right hand with your left hand. “Now you are here with me, no second thoughts.” He whispered to you, as his right hand moved to grab his erection, “Have you decided?” Your eyes looked deep into his eyes and nodded. “I’ve decided.” You replied, “The past before no return.” He echoed back the phrase and smiled at you. You gasped as you felt him against your slit; his forehead lay against yours, as he slowly entered inside. You closed your eyes and began to take deep breaths. He groaned softly as he was fully inside; he didn’t move an inch as you were getting used to the strange yet pleasurable sensation. You could feel the pain beginning to dull, so you looked at him as a signal to move. He began to thrust inside you slowly and gently, making you moan. His right hand grabbed your left wrist as he began to form a rhythm. You saw, he closed his eyes and his face twisted in pleasure. His eyebrows furrowed, his lips parted, and his eyes sealed shut. Your voice echoed throughout the room as you could feel yourself losing to your inner dark desires. Your free right hand dug into his back, as he continued to rock his hips. Slowly, your hand grabbed the back of his head to pull him towards you, his eyes open to realize what you wanted. He leaned forward with his lips mere inches away from yours, a short pause to breathe in each other’s air before clashing them together. The kiss began to get rough as you felt your teeth clashing against his teeth, yet you wanted more.
Your hand never left the back of his head, until you broke the kiss to breathe. Still, he never lost his rhythm; rather, he began to quicken his pace. Looking at each other again, he let go of your hand and wrapped his arms around your torso to place you on his lap. His hands held the back of your thighs, as you wrapped your arms around his neck. This new angle made you let out a sweet little cry, which was music to his ears. Your left hand tangled into his hair as your right hand was placed on his shoulder, with your forehead touching his forehead. You could feel your body getting warmer and the familiar feeling was forming in the pit of your stomach. You flung your head back as the thrusts became deeper, and he was squeezing your thighs. Your legs wrapped around his torso and pulled him closer. He began to let out low, rough grunts as his thrusts began to falter. “M-my angel…” You said in a high voice, “I can feel…” He groaned before saying something you didn’t think you would hear. “M-Morpheus, your angel of m-music is named Morpheus.” He said in a raspy tone. You cried out his name, and your fingers began to dig deep into his back. “Morpheus, my stomach…” You whined, then you could feel his lips press against your collarbone to soothe you. Morpheus shushed you once more, as your legs began to shake. “Morpheus!” You screamed out, and the knot in your stomach burst. It was as if time slowed down for a moment, and your vision turned blurry. His thrusting turned sloppy until he too cried out, and you felt something pulsing inside you. You began to whimper from the stimulation, and Morpheus laid you down on the bed again, gently.
Your body shivered and you felt him slip out of you. Your eyes searched for him, but your eyes began to involuntarily close, and you tried to fight the urge. His voice echoed in your ears, “One love, one lifetime.” Your eyes shut, and you fell into a deep slumber. When Morpheus saw you fall into a deep slumber, he got off the bed to place the bedsheets on top of you and kissed your forehead after putting on his clothes again. You dreamt of nothing, and everything was silent. In fact, when you opened your eyes, you found yourself alone. Your stomach twisted because you thought he had left you forever alone until you heard soft music coming from the other room. You fixed the dress you had on and walked to the other room to see Morpheus playing around with the piano. With no rush, you walked over to him and placed your hands on his face. He leaned back in response to your touch, enjoying the touches. As your fingers lingered by his mask, you said, “Whose is the face in the mask?” When the mask was removed, he screamed as his hand covered his face, and shoved you to the ground. You hit the floor with your head hitting a piece of furniture. “Damn you, you prying Pandora!” Morpheus shouted as he walked away from you, he faced a mirror and removed the cover. “Now you can never be free!” You saw the left side of his face had a large scar that went from the chin up to his forehead. He began to walk around his lair while throwing down books and pages, screaming, “Curse you, can you even dare to look or think of me?” Your eyes began to fill with tears, as you rose from the ground.
“This loathsome gargoyle who burns in Hell,” He cried out while covering his scarred face, “But secretly yearns for heaven…For…” Morpheus’ eyes flicker to you, as you raise your hand walking toward him. He began to walk backward until you whispered his name. Mere inches away from each other, you placed your hand against his hand that was covering his face. “Morpheus, my angel.” You whispered, as you softly tugged his hand away from his face. Morpheus stood still, as you tugged his hand completely off his face. His eyes lowered until you lifted his chin to look at you. “My angel of music.” You said to him in awe, “I see no demon in front of me. I see an angel.” Morpheus looked at you with disgust and huffed. “You’re lying. I am the demon of Hell.” He said in a monotone voice. You closed the gap between you two and cradled his face. “From what I’ve learned, demons were once fallen angels. Do you not agree that angels are beautiful?” You asked while caressing his scarred face, “To me, you’ll always be my angel of music.” Before you could kiss his lips, he pushed you away and grabbed his mask.
Morpheus fixed the mask on his face and turned around to see you trying to blink back tears. “Come, we must return to the opera house; they’ll be looking for you.” He stated as he helped you down the lair steps. With a broken heart, you followed him into the boat and sat down. The ride back was quiet, as you wanted to express that you were now in love with your angel of music, despite his scars. When you reached the hallway, he held your hand; but it wasn’t a firm grasp as before. Before you slipped back into your room, you turned around to face Morpheus, your angel of music, for the final time. “When will I see you again?” You asked while looking at him. “You’ll see me soon.” He replied in a cold tone. Before you could lose your chance, you immediately kissed him on the lips and blurted out, “I love you, Morpheus, my angel of music.” Morpheus stood still from the kiss and cleared his throat. He nodded and kissed your forehead before leaving you behind. Your heart ached in pain, as you saw him leave. With sorrow, you entered your room and lay on your bed. “Oh, Morpheus.” You cried out as tears began to spill out, “I will always love you.” You hoped to see him once more, the angel of music, the phantom of the opera, and your lover. Until then, all you had were faint memories of that night to hold on to. Those memories were embedded in your mind, forever. Morpheus would return, as he promised. But the aftermath of his return was rather gruesome. The only thing left of his identity would be the kid he gave you, on that fateful night. A son named Pierre.
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For the fic asks, 5, 29 for your Poe/Volya fics, and 37
!!! Ah, thank you!! *rubs my hands together gleefully* my time to shine, I love talking about these two
5. What do you wish someone would ask you about [insert fic]? Answer it now!
I feel like every single question I've ever wanted to be asked about Poe and Volya just like - flew right out of my head, lol. I contemplated something about their Force connection but I don't actually think I've included it yet in any of the fics I've posted to ao3, so I'm gonna go with something involving the "bad au" once again, cos it's something that jumped out to me when I was reading the tlj era fics back to back: the difference in when Poe and Volya both think something's changed between them, and why.
In my hand was the one you reached for, Poe mentions in his internal dialogue that something changed between them aboard the Raddus (which I think is reinforced in an earlier one-shot that @dameronalone wrote) during the events of tlj, but in the fic that's pretty much a direct sequel to that, if we got nothing we got us, which takes place from Volya's POV, she thinks that their relationship shifted after he made it back from Jakku and the Finalizer.
And I think that makes a lot of sense, 'cos although we definitely haven't touched on that specific era yet from Volya's POV yet, the days Poe is missing absolutely are what makes Voy in this verse realize just how much she loves him and just what she's been risking trying to hide that. Unfortunately, her crash course in "fuck I can't lose him, I love him too much for that and he doesn't even know it" gets a follow-up grade in tlj when they get put on separate transports during the evac to Crait....cos I'm. extremely evil.
And then of course, for Poe - they haven't really had the time to *stop* since he got back, until the Raddus, for better or worse (but mostly for worse), so I think that's the first stretch of time that he's actually had where he can notice something has changed for Volya that makes her a lot more open with her feelings than before, and ergo that their relationship has shifted because of it.
29. What songs would be (or are) on a playlist for [insert fic]? Explain your choices if you want!
I mean I have a couple of generalized poelya playlists already to be quite honest - their regular one, and one specifically for the aforementioned bad au. And one somewhere that's specifically songs I think Volya would put in a playlist that remind her of Poe.
But.....the two songs that are just simply put the most Volya/Poe to me, to the point that they could really fit any fic I've written for them, is About Love by Marina and Storm by Ruelle. Their relationship is (obviously) very much inspired by my big ole feelings for Poe, so Poe's pretty much the first/only person Volya's also had big ole feelings for, and I think these songs really capture the "oh shit this is my one exception and oh man what do i do with all these FEELINGS" that Volya constantly feels around him:
… Started in the strangest way
Didn't see it coming
Swept up in your hurricane
Wouldn't give it up for nothing
Now I'm all caught up in the highs and the lows
It's a shock to my system
I don't wanna run away so I stay [About Love]
&
I am caught off guard by you
Like a wave I'm pulled into
It's a feeling I can't fight
Like a wildfire deep inside
You're taking my heart by storm
I'm lost in your love (lost in your love)
I can't hold back any more
I'm lost in your love (lost in your love) [Storm]
37. Promote one of your own “deep cut” fics (an underrated one, or one that never got as much traction as you think it deserves!). What do you like about it?
Okay, my first thought was not actually a Star Wars fic - although there's definitely some fics of mine there that I wish got more traction, and it'd be nice if my poelya ones got a leetol more attention but I'm also not terribly bothered by that because hey I'm writing for myself and my friends and it's fun - it was a crossover Spidey/Moon Knight fic that I wrote in 2022.
Just...maybe not the crossover you were expecting. I had finished replaying Spider-Man PS4, I think, and I was like....this would work really well for a crossover with Moon Knight. It ended up being a blend of the television show and the early Mackay run before I quit reading. It definitely got a little bit of attention, but mostly just of folks wanting a continuation, which I had no plans for. But it's definitely still one of my favorite fics I've written - writing for Peter really is just so much fun.
fic writer asks?
#ask box#galacticwildfire#thanks!!! <333#poelya#yeah if i had a nickel for every smartassy loyal self sacrificing proud nerd who's name starts with 'p' that i love writing for#i'd have two nickels#and i'm not unconvinced the first nickel isn't why i adore the second one so much lmao
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FNAF MOVIE FUCKING THOUGHTS SPOIEKRS SPOILEET SPOILERSSS love my british privileges for getting me this movie early.
FUCK OUGUSYAGUSGHG
so bad it’s good. camp camp camp. SO GOODDFFD
THE PURTTRO THE OUTTO SONG GODD
FUCKING CRIED AT THE END OUGHHHUGGU AUTISTICALLY SO FULLL OF EMOTIONS
“I always come back” YES. UES. YES. YES. YES.
SEQUEL WHEN SEQUEL WHENNN
william afton after killing his daughter in every adaptation
FOXY THE FIRST ANIMATRONIC WE SEEE OUGHIHGHH MY FAVIEEEEEEE
matpat cameo had me SCREAMING. ITS JUST A THEORYYYYY
balloon boy actually had me laughing so hard every jumpscare
THE FUCKING LORE AT THE END OF THE CREDITS OMLMATPAT GET ON THIS SHIT. THEORISE YOU BITCH
i’m so autistic about this movie. don’t talk to me.
springtrap. my favie
CRYING CHILD GOT A NAME. FUCKING GARRETT
so mad they didn’t keep the aftons british but it’s understandable now we know that movie vanny is movie williams daughter
mike after being the most uncomfortable most unliked man in the entire world throughout the entire movie. he’s just like me fr
CORY!!! CORY GOT A POSTCREDITS SCENE IM SO PROUD OF HIM!!!!!
THEY TRUED MAKING ABBY INTO BABY OH MY GODDDD I WAS SO FUCKING HYPED. I WAS SO HYPED. BABY MY BELOVED
THE INSPIRATION FROM THE SCOOPING ROOM IMMEDIATELYYYY HAD ME SQUEALING i love sisster location sm okay.
the sibling bond was nice. the whole “older brother trying with his younger sister he just doesn’t know how to connect to” RLLY did shine thru
also i did fully think abby was autistic and not actually haunted for the first half of the movie. she can be both tho! #AUTISM4EVER
THE GOLDEN FREDDY HINTS. DONT THINK I DIDNT SEE THE “it’s me” ON THE MIRROR.
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Avatar (2009) and its pop cultural disappearance
Welcome back to my blog. Since Avatar’s long awaited sequel is coming out in a few months, I was thinking about the original movie, which destroyed every box office record between 2009 and 2010. Specifically, I was wondering: why did Avatar leave no trace in pop culture?
The movie itself is rarely mentioned, you barely hear someone quoting a line or a scene from Avatar, let alone remembering the characters’ names outside of Jake Sully and, perhaps, the alien Neytiri.
If we think about director James Cameron’s previous film, however, the story is another. We are talking about Titanic, a movie still loved and referenced 25 years after it was released, back in 1997. Leonardo DiCaprio is still a huge star, and, when it comes to the music, Celine Dion’s My Heart Will Go On is so famous that it could be hard to find someone who, at the mention of her name, thinks about another song.
The same cannot be said, for instance, with Leona Lewis’ I See You, and, with the actors, Zoe Saldana might be more famous for her MCU role as Gamora, ironically another alien with a colourful skin. As with Sam Worthington, while he did go on to have a nice career, he has nowhere near the star power that DiCaprio obtained with Titanic.
What happened to Avatar? How did the movie that became the highest grossing one in history manage to barely left a scratch in pop culture?
I will try to share my opinion.
Avatar was well crafted in every detail. Top notch special effects, wonderful landscapes (CGI generated, but inspired by real life landscapes), a believable alien culture (with a language created specifically for the movie), diverse flora and fauna and even the accuracy of making the Na’Vi blue because their planet, Pandora, had two suns.
However, the plot is something we have seen countless times. The main character, initially, is on the side of those who want to fight against a people. Then, he finds out that said people is actually on the good side, and fights for them. Not only there are so many stories with this plot (just to name one, the series of John Carter of Mars, created in 1912, even adapted as 2012’s John Carter), but, in that year, District 9 came out, with a similar structure, beautiful special effects and a better handled plot.
I can show you a culinary parallelism. Imagine you are walking into a luxurious restaurant. The waiters are all elegant, the chairs and tables are manually crafted, the cutlery made of pure silver and the menu is nothing short of a silk towel, with golden writing on it. You order something, whose name resembles something that came from French cuisine, and you trust the chef, renowned as much as Gordon Ramsey.
After a few minutes, in which you cannot wait to taste it, someone serves you a shiny tray. You look into it… and it’s pork and beans!
Now, tell me: if you were to think about that restaurant again, would you think about the luxury around you, or that all those efforts pretty much just served you pork and beans?
Also, Avatar even lost its potential role of an original story that managed to shine when put next to adaptations, remakes and reboots. In 2010, Inception came out, and managed to show the potential of an original blockbuster, something that director Christopher Nolan even replicated with 2014’s Interstellar, and then with his subsequent movies. Ironically, the main character of Inception was played by Leonardo DiCaprio.
What about the 3D? When Avatar came out, everything was around 3D. Movies tried to capture the 3D craze, even when it was clear how the movie was produced without said intention, and, as such, you barely had one scene where 3D was well used, and it could have been a pure coincidence.
I sincerely hope that Avatar’s sequel manages to be a success and finally give the highest grossing movie of all time the rightful spot in pop culture.
After all, from a business standpoint, it also represented a watershed. Before its release, only four movies had grossed one billion Dollars. Now, you could barely get in the top 50 movies of all time with that number.
So, what do you think? Should Avatar get its place in pop culture? Or do you believe it’s a good thing that this blockbuster came, smashed every record and then left no traces?
#avatar#avatar movie#avatar 2009#james cameron avatar#avatar 2#avatar the way of water#3d#sam worthington#zoe saldana#happy zozz!#pop culture#random thoughts#leona lewis#titanic
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For a fun WIP question, perhaps discuss your inspirations and how much your stories have diverted from them or in what ways they take from them.
Sarah shared that their original idea was based on Of Monsters and Men's first album, but it was very different. It was only focused on two characters and a lot of the original concepts are gone now. They think the character names might be the only thing that has stayed the same after all this time. Sarah said, and I quote "they've grown up after all this time! They are worse people."
They think this comes from them growing as a writer and being able to get past the "good guy v. bad guy" dichotomy and adding nuance to a character's actions and motivations.
Sarah's series, The Fall, started as one book but is now a 6 book series.
Madie said that her original idea was "Oh, pirates. I wanna make pirate story" 😂 she was inspired by the song Wonderland by ATEEZ. It's changed a lot over the years. Some of the characters have stayed the same at their core, but a lot of the plot has changed. It went from being a stand alone book, but it has also grown into a 6 book series with a sequel series planned.
Mine was actually an off-shoot of an AU fic I wrote when I was 15 in which the characters are transported to all kinds of different dimensions and one of the dimensions was a rough version of the Paragon world. And it grew a lot when I realized I was writing a more interesting story within my story :D
(Sarah is @harps-for-days)
This ask motivated me to write 149 words for Home is Where Your Light Shines Brightest.
Experiment Total: 74,266
#ask and you shall receive#moremysteriesthantragedies#zac speaks#writing#writeblr#my wips#wips of friends#paragon#writing retreat#writing circle#the great motivation experiment
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Let me tell you something. I feel it is important for your life education to know about Detachable Penis, if you do not already.
The first thing you need to understand about the 90′s is that this song played on the radio. Even out in Bumfuck Nowhere where I grew up. If you had an alternative or college station in range you would have heard it frequently. For a while in the 90s, an oddball spoken word stoner track by an avante-guard rock band with a poet frontman could get regular airplay just because it was funny and it made you sing “detachable penis” to yourself the entire rest of the day.
I woke up this morning with a bad hangover and my penis was missing again. This happens all the time. It's detachable. This comes in handy a lot of the time. I can leave it home, when I think it's gonna get me in trouble, Or I can rent it out, when I don't need it. But now and then I go to a party, get drunk, and the next morning I can't for the life of me remember what I did with it.
Our hero spends the rest of the song looking for his missing penis while sounding only mildly put out about it, and the listener is inspired to think about the pros and cons of having a detachable penis. (Which leads inevitably to other thoughts, such as, of course, detachable titties. Someone make the sequel please.) These were highly unusual ponderings for a genre still very much concerned with hyper-masculinity and misogyny. Gender introspection in my radio hit? It’s more likely than you think! (Not much, but still.)
In the late 80s-early 90s, before Nirvana exploded and grunge became marketable, rock radio was flailing around for a direction. Hair bands were dying out and nothing was replacing them. In this window of time the College Radio format had its time to shine - a smorgasboard of bits and pieces of things that sound cool fished out of the Our Band Could Be Your Life mileau of independent label groups. Everyone figured one of these oddities would blow up into the Next Big Thing, and everyone wanted to find it first. So at this time you got some genuinely strange stuff into the mainstream, with pretty risky endeavors given major label record deals and even videos onto MTV.
King Missile, meanwhile, was on their Fifth album and Second lineup by the time this song hit the airwaves, and it both made and broke the band -- a wave of fans jumped aboard that wanted to hear Detachable Penis and absolutely nothing else. Things got weird for everyone and the lead singer ended up quitting music and going to law school for awhile for much of the rest of the decade, before showing up again with the Third, and then Fourth, incarnation of King Missile, no longer remotely interested in radio airplay, sales, or major labels. In that they have the same trajectory of a lot of bands of this time, like Butthole Surfers, that made one big hit on a major label that proved to be an aberration in a long career of weird music. In nearly all these cases the band itself quickly faded from memory, but the song lingers on, and if you play Detachable Penis for a Generation Xer of any stripe they will quickly perk up and start nodding their head.
Anyway here’s one more track from King Missile circa 1987, well before Detachable Penis - it has a much more haphazard backing track, and is a little less friendly to your ears, but is overall some good funny commie stick it to the man stuff. It’s called Take Stuff From Work.
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3 Things ask: 3, 6, 21. Have a great day! ^^
3. 3 songs that mean something to you
Why am I like this? - Orla Gartland
I just relate to it idk what else to say
2. People Watching - Conan Gray
Again I relate to it and it is such a hopeless romantic aroace vibe
3. not your fault (hey you) - yaewow
One of my friends introduced me to this song and I had previous just been through a really messy and hurtful friendship break up/collapse (basically fake friends and hurtful text messages) but it helped me realise that is wasn't my fault and that i didn't do anything wrong.
6. 3 characters that inspire you
I actually am not 100% but will give it my best shot
Steve Rogers (aka captain america) (MCU)
I just love the idea how he was a little man and how it was all about a good man not a solider. I am not like pro war or american or whatnot but liked how he was like "i don't like bullies, i don't care where they are from"
2. Leslie Knope (Parks and Rec)
She kinda makes me want to go into politics. But I just love how she was able to remain strong and smart while still being incredibly caring and goofy.
3. Samwise Gamgee (LOTR)
Im just gonna leave this quote here:
"It's like in the great stories, Mr. Frodo. The ones that really mattered. Full of darkness and danger they were. And sometimes you didn't want to know the end. Because how could the end be happy? How could the world go back to the way it was when so much bad had happened? But in the end, it’s only a passing thing, this shadow. Even darkness must pass. A new day will come. And when the sun shines it will shine out the clearer. Those were the stories that stayed with you. That meant something, even if you were too small to understand why. But I think, Mr. Frodo, I do understand. I know now. Folk in those stories had lots of chances of turning back, only they didn’t. They kept going, because they were holding on to something. That there is some good in this world, and it's worth fighting for."
21. 3 things you are the most passionate about
Human Rights
Just like in general, there are so many issues throughout the world that need to be worked on. Refugees, LGBTQIA+, Women, those with disabilities and struggle to access healthcare, POC and the indigenous and first nations people of countries. I am trying to generalise it all into one passion but I think there are just so many people not getting their human rights met, in all countries of the world. I want to try and make a difference in the world.
2. My fandoms
If you get me started talking about star wars (from the sequels ruining ankins sacrifice to just Anakin Skywalker in general to how you view him is based on aspects such as fate and destiny) , miraculous ladybug, percy jackson, the medoran chronicles, The 100, Scooby Doo (about how everyone in the scooby gang is 🏳️🌈) etc, I will not stop talking about it.
3. Travel and exploring the world
Considering I have never even left Australia, I just really want to travel the world. I want to go everywhere and see everything. Experience things outside of my comfort zone and learn about other cultures.
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Warrior - Li Yong | Her Elegant Criminal
Rating: T (implied toxic relationship)
Word count: 206
Summary: Li Yong knows well that Mai Ling is bad for him. He tries to get away from her, but every time he does, he gets dragged back into her. And being brainwashed, all he can do is nod.
A songfic inspired by the song "Criminal" by soloist and Shinee member Taemin
A/N: the moment i first listened to this song i KNEW it was giving li yong vibes bc of the lyrics!! i'm also planning to write a multi-chapter fic as an indirect sequel to this (since i wanted this to be centered on li yong) but yeah i guess that's it??
anyways this was vv fun to write and i hope you enjoy reading this!!
ALSOO idk if any of you saw one of my latest posts but i changed my url!! i figured the previous one was too long so i swapped it with something a lil shorter :>
Cross-posted from AO3
Li Yong knows well that Mai Ling is bad for him. He tries to get away from her, but every time he does, he gets dragged back into her. And being brainwashed, all he can do is nod.
***
“I don’t want to deny the truth. It was destined to be her from the beginning.”
“Or is she?” Kong Pak retorts. “Li Yong, she is dangerous for you. You know that.”
Li Yong nodded his head in agreement. He knew that the moment he fell for her, was the end of his innocence. Behind Mai Ling’s childlike, innocent face, there is a frightening side to her - one that gives Li Yong goosebumps.
But he doesn’t hate how her words make his feet entangled and dance. His heart with an open wound is already full of her fingerprints ; his hands holding hers that stabbed him are not clean either.
Kong Pak then lets out a sigh. “Open your eyes. Her ambition has cost many innocent lives, and unless you stop her, it will continue to hurt many more. Yes, she is certainly driven and ambitious- but she is not as clever as she thinks she is.”
“Sounds like I need to have a talk with her.”
“You should.”
tags: @bleep-blop-lizard-hop @nyctophilic0vitnir (please lmk via dms if you want to be untagged!)
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Super Mario Bros Movie Trilogy Theories
Second movie is called Super Mario World and is about Bowser enlisting the Koopalings to strike several locations around the world at once, necessitating the team go on a globe trotting adventure to stop them.
Peach enlists the help of another powerful warrior and Ally to the Mushroom Kingdom: Princess Daisy, who Luigi immediately falls for (because of course he needs to be straight :/)
Mario tries to convince him not to go for it because she's a princess, causing Luigi to casually drop that he dated Mayor Pauline during their argument.
Much of the plot is dedicated to Mario raising the Yoshi that hatched from the egg he found and refusing to let it participate in the action because he wants to protect it.
B-plot is dedicated to Bowser Jr. feeling left out because all his siblings were entrusted with a mission but him, causing him to forcibly insert himself into Bowser's plan.
After stopping all 7 Koopalings, they think they've saved all the Macguffins... Until they find out the Bowser had a second plan simultaneously in motion all along - stealing the ULTIMATE Macguffin from... The real world's moon!
While in the real world, Peach gets distracted by seeing all the other humans, causing her to wonder about her own origins.
The group manages to intercept the clown rocket the Koopalings were taking to join up with Bowser on the moon but the Koopalings escape... Sans Mario with some help from Yoshi.
Despite Yoshi being the entire reason Mario was able to board the shop and still have a shot of saving the day, Mario still scolds it for jumping into the action.
Once on the moon, Mario tries to stop Bowser on his own until their fight is interrupted completely by Bowser Jr, who takes the power of the MacGuffin and uses it to take it out on Mario AND Bowser. Seeing Bowser Jr rant about how he never got a chance to shine under Bowser causes Mario to rethink things with Yoshi.
Finally embracing Yoshi's willingness to help, the two of them united are able to stop Bowser Jr and in the process, launch Bowser deep into space, serving as a sequel hook for the third movie.
Third Movie is called Super Mario Galaxy and focuses on the Mario Bros and Yoshi exploring space in search of Bowser.
Peach is absent from this one as she explores the real world in search of answers from her past. Yes this sounds rad as hell and deserves to be its own movie. No it's not going to be explored unless the third movie is SUCH a blockbuster they get the backing to release a Peach themed spinoff movie.
This movie introduces Rosalina and most of the movie is about the Bros getting to know her and learning her backstory.
This movie expands on the singular song the first movie had by making this movie entirely a musical. Clearly this is all just a set up so Rosalina can get a musical number that is not so subtly inspired by Let it Go which is ironic as hell because Rosalina predates Elsa by a good 6 years but like WHAT EVER.
The Mario Face Ship shows up and in this movie was invented by Dr. E Gadd for whatever reason.
Aside from Rosalina this movie is not gonna have as good a plot and hopefully the bad reviews will convince the powers that be to not overstay their welcome with Mario movies and try to pump one out every year like with Marvel.
Plots gonna suck but they WILL go ham on the space exploration sequences with beautiful scenes of galaxies chocked full of references to so much Mario lore that will only be on screen for 2 seconds max because they're montages and they need to move on.
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𝒂𝒃𝒚𝒔𝒔
summary �� hades gasped at the feeling. he could feel tears prickling his shiny silver eyes.
pairing ─ hades!bucky barnes x persephone!reader
warnings ─ light angst, a little fluff (blink you miss it), depressed thoughts, loneliness, general the winter soldier thinking (does that even make any sense), tws!bucky, love at first sight, this part is just,,,,, a part :d nothing really important happens
a/n ─ i listened to a song and got inspired all of a sudden. moodboards spurred me on, too, so here i am! hope you like it! please leave a comment if you do! thank youuuu <333 [there will be a sequel :) ]
Underworld was a dark and lonely place. There was almost no light; the souls coming out from the Styx River were providing only a very small amount. The torches were the only other source of light. It wasn’t a problem to Hades, though. He could see very well in dark.
He looked around as he walked up to the river. He could hear some souls weeping, some crying and some talking to themselves in gibberish. With every small wave of the river, there was a new soul appearing above it, and Hades actually loved watching them wander around.
His castle was made on some type of a hill. Whenever he looked out of his window, he could see Underworld in its all dark glory. It was a beautiful place, actually. One should have had a love for darkness to get used to here, Hades thought idly as his eyes wander around, and taking in the sight before him.
Sometimes, though, sometimes Hades preferred the surface to Underworld. Sometimes, he yearned for its fresh air instead of Underworld’s cold and stale air. It wasn’t smelly, but after some amount of time, it became unbearable to him. So, he occasionally visited the surface.
Today was one of those days.
The weather was nice when Hades stepped into the forest. There was a light chill, the sun was shining bright and warming the places where its rays touched. Trees were vibrant green, flowers were smiling at the sun. Some of the animals were hoping from one place to another, birds chirping and some rustle caused by other animals could be heard.
Hades watched the happy scene before him with clouded, dark and sad eyes. His eyes were their real color, steel blue, instead of the threatening shiny silver. He had his classic all-black outfit on him, his big cloak covering his wings. His hair was down, crown left behind in his castle in the Underworld.
He took a shaky, silent breath as he let the fresh air of the forest fill in his lungs. He stood where he was for a couple more minutes. He was relishing the feeling of the sun’s shy kisses to his bare hands. He missed the sun, he missed its warmth, Hades realized. Underworld was always so cold, so dark and so empty. So lonely. Standing in this very forest, Hades did not feel lonely. There were a lot of alive creatures around him. He felt alive, he realized. It had been a while since I felt like that, Hades thought.
He exhaled softly, taking a tentative step forward. As soon as his foot met the green ground, the grass paled, its vibrant color turned into an ash gray: Its life died as soon as Hades’ presence touched it. Hades felt its life energy fading into the thin air. A sad feeling bloomed in his chest. He kept walking forward, dragging the end of his cloak behind him, making it kiss the dead grass his steps behind.
Ignoring the fact that he was taking the life energy of all the live things when he touched them, Hades enjoyed the warmth of the sun on his face. As he walked deeper into the forest, as he chased the warmth, the more he felt like a human. An amused, faint smile caused the corner of his lips curl up a bit at the thought.
Feeling like a human, he thought again. It was a far thing for him. He could only imagine what kind of beings they were since he was never been one. He watched their lives float in front him, all lost and lonely and sad. Just like him.
Hades felt his body shiver and tremble slightly albeit the sun shining right above him with its all might. He made peace with his loneliness centuries ago, but it never stopped hurting him, never stopped him from shivering and feeling sad whenever he realized how lonely he was. He was okay with it, but it hurt nevertheless.
Eyes closed, lost in his mind, drifting in the sea of his dark thoughts, Hades heard a soft voice. It sounded very much like a laugh. His eyes snapped open, glimmering with its dangerous shiny silver color. He didn’t dare to take another step instead he listened.
A soft breeze licked his face, kissed his cheeks and stroked his long hair, but Hades did not dare to move. He could hear birds chirping still, leaves on the trees were playing with the breeze, but there was no other voice. Did he mistaken, then? It couldn’t be, he thought. He was never mistaken. Just as he took a small step forward, he heard the same soft voice again.
“Ah, miss petunia,” his ears picked up the light talking immediately. “You look very beautiful today.” Then, a gentle laughter echoed in the forest.
Hades shrugged, causing his cloak to fall off his shoulders, and revealed his enormous wings. They were pitch black with silver strikes in them. They looked like a night sky without a moon but with a lot of stars. They opened on his sides with another light shrug, immediately shadowing over the small animals and flowers from the sunlight.
Hades quietly walked towards the sound. Whoever they were, they were talking to someone very gently and lovingly. He wanted to know how they looked like, wanted to know if they were a threat to him. Hades was curious.
“Oh, hello,” the voice called out gently as Hades hid behind a tree when he came as close as he could to the voice. “Hello, mister rabbit, where is the rush?” They giggled, their fragile sounding laughter echoed weakly. Hades emerged behind the tree and turned his shiny silver eyes to the talking person.
They were a woman with gorgeous hair that shone beautifully under the sunlight. She was wearing a cream colored dress that hung on her body comfortably. She had a flower crown adorning her hair, a small basket next to her which was filled with some fruits and flowers she had been picking up from here and there. Her face was shining even brighter than the sun itself; her large smile, sparkling, happy eyes were filling Hades with life.
She was breathing life into his very dead and cold soul without even realizing his presence. She was warming his whole body, from head to toe, each bone in his immortal body was singing with the warmth and life she was giving to him just by being in his sight.
Hades gasped at the feeling. He could feel tears prickling his shiny silver eyes. This feeling in his chest, in his heart, he had never felt anything like it before. He had lived many lives, had been alive for so long and would be alive for many, many more, but this feeling he would never forget.
His cold, dead and black heart was beating. With each beat, his body was getting warmer.
Suddenly, she became his sun, his oxygen and his purpose of living. She was his center of his world. She was this bright side of him that he never had before.
Suddenly, she was his everything, but she didn’t know that. Yet.
Hades sobbed softly for the first time in many centuries, and he fell to his knees, his wings dropping with him. The real color of his eyes, steel blue, peeked under the silver, the tears were making them shine bright. Hades felt the sunlight hit where he was on his knees, but he didn’t feel its warmth because he had hers. Her warmth. He didn’t need the sun anymore, not when he had her. Another sob made its way out of his mouth. His chest was heaving slightly with the silent tears and sobs and gasps.
For the first time in his whole immortal life, Hades felt the feeling what humans called love filling his whole being, his chest and heart. It made him feel lighter and happier. Everything was bright now, the darkness was scared and it ran away from him.
Hades felt happy because he wasn’t in the darkness anymore. She was his light.
Hades felt lighter because he wasn’t alone anymore. He had her.
She was his, and he was hers.
Hades smiled.
It was the most sincere smile his lips ever taken the form of. It felt real and sincere to him, too.
So, he just smiled wider.
#bucky barnes x reader#hades!bucky barnes x persephone!reader#bucky barnes smut#bucky barnes imagines#bucky barnes au#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes angst#bucky barnes fluff#bucky barnes x you#bucky x you#bucky barnes blurbs#hades!bucky barnes#tws!bucky barnes#tws!hades!bucky#abyss
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An Ocean Away - Harry Styles
Sequel to Tastes Like Strawberries 🍓 !
a/n: ahhh! thank you so much for the love you showed TLS! i already had more planned for the story, but all your comments motivated me to do this part 2! it’s an emotional one so brace yourselves! further in the chapter i placed the song that inspired the title and i listened to it while writing so i suggest you do the same!
pairing: professor!Harry x Reader
warning: sexual content
word count: 12.7k
masterlist
You walk down the familiar hallway texting back Eden that you are not spending the night at home again.
Eden: You really need to tell me about the dick that keeps you so busy these days.
Y/N: I never said a thing about any dick.
Eden: Oh please, you surely got yourself a rebound after Harry, you can’t tell me otherwise.
Y/N: Don’t you get a rebound when you broke up with someone? I was never together with Harry, so it doesn’t make sense.
Eden: You had a thing!! Okay, whatever. Keep your little secrets, I guess it’s fine…
Y/N: Love you!
Chuckling to yourself you put the phone away and stop at the door you know all too well, knocking two times before you open it and poke your head inside.
Harry is sitting at his desk, his reading glasses sitting low on the bridge of his nose as he is vigorously scribbling something down into his notebook. He lifts his head at your arrival and you shut the door closed behind you.
“Hello, professor,” you smile at him teasingly, walking around his desk as he pushes himself back a little so you can sit on his lap, pecking his lips gently.
“Hey, done for the day?” he asks, his fingers tenderly stroking your thighs over the fabric of your jeans.
“Yeah. We can leave if you’re done,” you nod.
“Just a few more minutes, alright?”
“Sure,” you nod, standing up from his lap so he can finish his work while you sit on the little loveseat he has in the corner, right under the window.
It’s been six weeks since New Year’s Eve, the new semester has officially started, you’re working your way towards your degree as this is officially your last semester, but what’s more important that you and Harry have been a couple for six weeks following the heated actions of New Year’s Eve.
Harry is still quite anxious about the whole thing, always on high alert and he even asked you to lie to Eden and Nat too. You tried to fight him on that, but you could tell how much he wanted to protect what you had so you decided to feed them this elaborate story about how you and Harry had a fight on New Year’s Eve and realized that it would have never worked out so you agreed to stay just friends. It seems like they believed, because they’ve been keen on trying to set you up with someone while you just keep dodging their attempts, sneaking around with Harry behind their back.
Other than the continuous lying and sneaking around, things have been going well with him. You’ve been spending a lot of time at his place, the only hiding spot where you can be carefree around each other without always watching out for others around you.
Today is Valentine’s day and though your opportunities to celebrate are very slim, having anything that’s slightly public crossed out of the list, that still doesn’t stop the two of you from having a good night in.
You watch him curiously as he is reading the lines of someone’s essay probably, or some test, whatever. Holding the pen ready to use whenever he finds something incorrect, he furrows his eyebrows at something before crossing out a line, mouthing the words he writes to the side of the page. He doesn’t wear his glasses that often, but he’s been complaining about having dry eyes these past days so it’s no surprised he switched to them from his contact lenses.
“You look sexy in your glasses, have I told you that?”
He glances at you, a small smirk tugging on his lips before he returns to the paper in front of him.
“Think they make me look older,” he mumbles under his breath.
“Nah, not more at least than your grandpa sweaters,” you tease him, earning a ‘Really? This again?’ look from him that makes you chuckle.
You busy yourself while Harry finishes his work and then you head out together, strictly keeping the distance between each other. Walking out of the building Harry heads to the left where the car park is while you take a turn to the right. It’s been your usual, since you can’t have anyone see you get into Harry’s car so casually, so you usually walk down to the small café near Building D, because there’s a very narrow little street running behind it where you can get into the car without anyone noticing you. You do the same now too before finally heading back to Harry’s place. Sinking into the comfortable seat, you stare out the window, thinking about how it’s just been six weeks since New Year’s Eve, but it feels like you’ve been together with Harry for months. Despite his many doubts and hesitant act, it was easy to fall into a kind of routine with him, and even more easier to get used to the thought that he is yours and you are his.
During these six weeks you’ve learned quite a few things about him, things women on campus would die to know and they were handed over to you on a silver plate by Harry himself.
One, he is a very touchy person, of course, when he has the chance for it. In the safety of his home or when you have a few minutes for yourselves in his office, he always likes to have his hand on your back or waist, he loves touching your hips or cheeks, caressing the skin wherever it shows from under your clothes. He is also very cuddly, likes to wrap you in his arms when you’re watching TV and when it’s time to sleep the first thing he does is to pull you into his embrace. You usually wake up in the morning with him completely wrapped around you, limbs thrown over you, face buried into your chest or stomach. He is a messy sleeper, but also a fucking adorable one.
Two, he is a good cook but not that good at baking. He says it’s the universe’s sign that he shouldn’t eat as much sweet stuff as he does, but in reality he just sucks at measuring the ingredients. He never follows the recipe, easily goes with things his own way and then he is surprised when it doesn’t turn out as it should.
Three, he notices the smallest things you’d never. Like how you hate it when the Sun is shining right into your face so he always makes sure to draw the blinds in the evening, or that you prefer sleeping with more pillows so he just simply gives you an extra without even asking every time you’re spending the night. He cares so much about you to the smallest details, it always makes your heart flutter.
And four, though he keeps a tough act in school, he is a lovesick puppy when no one is around, likes to be the small spoon when cuddling, absolutely adores it when you cup his face in your palms and kiss it all over. Loves it when you play with his hair or when you hug him from behind, kissing between his shoulder blades. He always tells you how pretty you are and never misses a chance to sneak a kiss from you. You couldn’t imagine him do any of these before you really knew him, but now you see that all these little things are just as much parts of him like the version of him he shows at school. You feel lucky to be able to see him like this and you’ll probably never get bored of it.
Arriving to his place you drop your bag off at the bedroom before you join him in the kitchen, already eyeing the flyer to the nearby Italian place that delivers.
“How about pizza?” he hums, eyebrows knitted together as he scans the menu.
“Sounds good. Can we order dessert too?” Walking past him you kiss his shoulder before grabbing a glass for yourself, filling it with tap water.
“Oh, no need,” he shyly answers, glancing at you. “We… have dessert.”
You watch him with curious eyes as he disappears in his little study before emerging with a plate filled with pink cupcakes. They look wobbly, the cream on top is not the same on either of them, but because you know he made them, they are the most perfect you’ve ever seen.
He places the plate to the counter with a shy smile before turning to you.
“Happy Valentine’s Day,” he murmurs, hands finding your hips as he pulls you in for a kiss.
“Oh baby, did you stay up last night to make these?” you ask, touched that he took the time and energy to surprise you with something. Harry nods and you kiss his dimples softly.
“Mm, they are strawberry flavored,” he smirks boyishly.
“We are never escaping strawberries,” you chuckle softly as you dip your fingertip into the cream on top of one of the cakes, tasting it. “Hmm, this is actually good,” you tell him.
“Yeah, the cream is kind of okay, dunno about the rest though,” he admits chuckling.
“As long as it’s not poisonous, I’ll love it,” you giggle kissing his lips again softly. “Alright, but I can’t go over the fact that we agreed on no gifts for Valentine’s Day,” you say giving him a look.
“S’not a gift, just… a little gesture,” he shrugs innocently.
“Okay, then you can’t get mad over my little gesture,” you smirk at him, peeling his arms off you before you run into his bedroom to get his gift.
You really weren’t planning to give him anything, but you had a good idea last minute and couldn’t just not do it. Digging into your bag you pull out the little box and join him in the kitchen again, handing it to him.
“It’s not fair if you spent money on it,” he pouts, but you just roll your eyes.
“You spent money on the cupcakes too. But besides, I didn’t spent a penny on it. Open it!” You urge him.
Harry huffs but takes the lid off, revealing a stack of Polaroid photos. In this not too ideal situation the two of you are living in, there’s no chance you can ever post anything about him, even though there are quite a few cute photos of you with Harry. Eden recently bought a Polaroid printer and you borrowed it to print your favorite pictures of the two of you. There’s one from the morning after New Year’s Eve, just a silly selfie you took in bed, then one with the band from Harry’s birthday recently, a photo of the two of you backstage of one of his gigs you took in the mirror, he has his guitar in his hands as you stand next to him smiling widely. There are a few more with Sarah, Mitch, Charlotte and Adam and at the very end of the stack… some special ones.
You watch him go through them smiling warmly until he reaches the last few and freezes. You took the courage to take a few spicy ones of yourself in your favorite lingerie and thought it would be sexy to print them out as well and give them to him.
“I hope you’re not thinking about selling them already,” you chuckle. Harry glances up at you before shaking his head with a playful smirk.
“Was just a little surprised by them,” he admits.
“Do you… like them?”
“Oh baby, I love them, you look… wow,” he breathes out going over the pictures one more time. “But I’m gonna have to lock these away so no one finds them. Adam likes to go over my stuff when he is over, I definitely don’t want him to find them.”
“You better keep them safe because if anyone sees them I’m burying myself,” you snort.
Harry puts the stack of photos back into the box before leaning down he cups your face and kisses you gently.
“Thank you, love the pictures. All of them,” he adds cheekily and you feel yourself blushing.
He leans in to kiss you again, putting the box aside to the counter and this time it’s not just one short kiss, he carries it on, taking his time with your lips, savoring and tasting you without a worry in the world. It grows more and more passionate, tongues clashing and you tug at his hair, lacing your fingers through his locks, a moan escaping his pink lips.
You start inching backwards until your backside meets the edge of the counter. Harry doesn’t hesitate to pull your sweater off of you, throwing it behind before his lips are pressed against yours again. It doesn’t take long for his shirt and pants and your jeans to end up on the floor somewhere behind him, leaving you both in just your underwear. You kiss down his neck and collarbones, your lips gliding across his tattooed chest as you slowly slide down to your knees, hands moving over his growing bulge.
Hooking your fingers into the elastic of his boxers, you tug them down and pull his erection out, already so hard for you and you barely even touched him.
“What does my Valentine deserve for making me cupcakes?” you hum, teasingly pumping him a few times with your hands. Harry whimpers under your touch, but doesn’t answer so you stop your hands and look up at him. “Talk to me, what do you want?”
“Your mouth,” he breathes out, his eyes meeting yours, filled with lust and hunger only for you. Smirking to yourself you lick his length up before gently kissing the head, swirling your tongue around the tip before you slowly take him into your mouth.
“Oh fuck, baby!” he pants when you start bobbing your head, pumping the base in sync with your head’s movements.
His hand comes to the back of your head, fingers lacing through your hair. He doesn’t force you, he never does, just likes to hold onto you. You try to take him deeper and deeper with each movement until you fit his whole cock into your mouth, keeping it there for a few seconds before pulling away and letting him go.
“You’re gonna be the death of me,” he mumbles, helping you up from the floor, kissing your lips hard as he is already pulling your panties down your legs. “How do you want it?”
“From behind,” you tell without hesitation, turning around so you can lean onto the counter and push your ass up for him.
You feel one of his hands stroke down your spine while the other one reaches between your legs, his fingers finding your clit, drawing gentle circles on it at first before he goes a little harder, making you moan his name.
“Harry, please!” you beg, the need to feel him growing with each passing second.
He pulls his hand back, grabbing his hard cock as he lines himself up with you, one hand on his shaft, the other one holding your hip firmly to keep you in place. First he pushes just the tip inside and when he is sure you’re ready to take more, he slides all of him inside, filling you up perfectly.
“Shit, you feel so fucking good. Always so good,” he breathes out, both his hands coming to grip your waist as his hips meet your ass from behind.
He starts moving, going a little soft at the beginning before he gets rougher, his hips smacking against your ass with each thrust. You arch your back and push your ass up so you’re angled just perfectly for him, he runs a hand up your back, sliding it under the clasp of your bra and he leaves it there while fucking you from behind oh so well.
“Harry, oh my God!” you groan when he starts hitting that one spot that makes you go crazy.
“Feeling good, baby?”
“Fuck! So good!” you gasp, feeling the pleasure building up with each thrust. “Go harder!” you beg and once he has both hands on your hips again he does as you asked, railing into you hard, making you keep gasping for air.
“Getting close? Tell me when you’re about to cum, baby.”
“I’m close, please don’t stop!” you pant, hands holding onto the counter’s edge for dear life.
He reaches around you, a hand coming between your legs as his fingers find your clit again, adding to the sensation as he starts playing with it just the way you like it.
“Fuck, fuck! I’m gonna cum! Harry!” you moan uncontrollably and he growls deeply from his chest.
“Cum with me, baby. Give it to me,” he breathes out sharply and he just keeps railing you hard, fingers working on your clit until he feels your walls clench around his dick. “Oh fuck, yes, baby! Cum on my cock!” he gasps and at the same time as you go through your orgasm, you feel him twitch inside you, coming hard with you at the same time. “Jesus fuck! I love you, Y/N!”
You gasp at his words, eyes snapping open in the middle of your orgasm and all air pushes out of your lungs for a moment.
He whimpers and moans, thrusting into you a few more times before he comes to a halt, both of you panting like crazy, coming off your high. When he slowly slides his softening cock out of you, you turn around and look into his eyes. For a moment you thought he just said it in the heat of the moment and he didn’t even realize it, but when your eyes meet his, you can tell he is a little afraid of what your reaction is going to be.
“Did you mean that?” you quietly ask as he tucks his dick back into his boxers, pulling them up, but you don’t bother to put your underwear back on, standing there in only your bra.
“I-I did. I didn’t mean to say it now, but I did mean it,” he nods. “Is it… too soon?”
“No,” you smile at him, stepping closer so you can cup his face in your palms, kissing his lips softly. “I love you too.”
“You do?” he asks, surprised at your reaction.
“Of course, silly. I wouldn’t give my nudes to someone I don’t,” you joke making him chuckle, his arms coming to curl around your waist.
“Sorry, this wasn’t too… romantic,” he breathes out and you press a kiss to the corner of his mouth.
“You said you love me while fucking me on Valentine’s Day after exchanging cute gifts. I think it’s romantic,” you chuckle, finally making him smile. “Besides, I don’t care about the setting, just feels nice to hear you say it.”
“Yeah?”
“Mhm, care to say it again so I can see your eyes as well?”
“I love you,” he softly murmurs, his forehead resting against yours.
“Yeah, feels better when I can actually look at you,” you chuckle kissing him softly. “I love you too.”
It’s definitely not just fun and games, being in a secret relationship that no one can know about. It surely adds a lot of tension into the situation, having to be so careful all the time and be reserved to the point where you can’t even be seen too often together.
As the semester carries on you always keep your ears open if there’s anything going on about you and Harry. Though you only limit your time together on campus to the bare minimum, only talking on rare occasions, you still want to make sure no one is getting the wrong (or right) idea about what is going on between the two of you.
The worst part is probably having to lie to Eden and Nat all the time. You spend about three nights at Harry’s every week and you have to lie every time you leave. After a while you tell them that you’re dating this new guy but he wants to keep it low-key because he recently broke up with his previous girlfriend. That gives them enough peace not to nag you all the time but you can tell they really want to meet this new man in your life.
You’ve tried to discuss it with Harry, tell him that they won’t tell anyone but it ended in a fight and you kind of gave up. Harry is way too keen on keeping it a secret and it’s clear he is not gonna make any exceptions. At least it’s the same with his friends, the two of you act like just friends when you’re out with the band though you have a suspicion that Sarah can see through the act. However she chooses not to talk about it so it’s kept hidden.
You don’t fight much with Harry, but when you do, it’s major. You both can get really into the argument and it easily gets way too heated, turning into a screaming match until you both realize you should just talk it out and have a little more understanding for each other. The makeup sex after a fight however… that’s something that makes up for every nasty thing that’s said in the heat of the moment.
Nearing the end of the semester you both start to grow more stressed, you about finishing your last classes, your thesis and studying for your finals, Harry about the growing pile of essays and tests waiting to be graded. A lot of the time when you’re at his place you both are busy with your own stuff and only have the chance to actually be with each other when you go to bed. It takes a toll on the both of you, but you’re determined to make it work. Despite the unfortunate nature of how you are forced to maintain your relationship, it’s the healthiest one you’ve ever head and you definitely won’t give up on it too easily.
Though you, Nat and Eden turn in your thesis works mid-April, the semester is still not done for the three of you, the final exams are threateningly close at this point. Spring has officially kicked in, the weather is mostly clear and sunny, allows you to stay outside again and you take advantage of it.
One particular afternoon the three of you are lounging under the pergola, all three of you buried in a book or your notes when you spot Harry walking towards the building. You keep your eyes on him as he slowly approaches you, his gaze meets yours and he smiles at you shortly. It’s all you can get out in the public, but it’s more than nothing.
“Isn’t it hard to see him?” Eden asks and glancing her way you see that she is looking at Harry who is now busy with his phone.
“Why would it be?”
“I don’t know, you clearly had a thing for him and it wasn’t even just a one-sided flirting like every other women had with him. I couldn’t be around him if it happened to me.”
“It’s not like anything major happened. It was all bad timing and the situation wasn’t good. It’s better this way,” you tell her, trying to sound convincing while the guilt is eating you on the inside. All these lies are clouding over your head and you have a feeling they will come down on you pouring one day.
“Still crazy that you are friends with his friends though,” Nat chimes in, squinting her eyes in the sunshine.
“Yeah, you are literally the only person on campus who gets to see him in his private life,” Eden nods. If only they knew how much you see him privately!
“It’s not that crazy,” you shrug, turning back to your book.
You all get back to work, forgetting about Harry, or at least Nat and Eden does, because you get a text from him shortly after he disappeared in the building.
Harry: You look very pretty today :)
Y/N: Flirting with me on campus, professor?
Harry: Can’t help it.
Y/N: You look handsome too, it’s a shame I can’t kiss you stupid!
Harry: Patience!
“Y/N? Did you hear what I said?” Nat grabs your attention from the phone and you realize she was talking to you.
“What? Uh, sorry.”
“I said that we should go out this weekend. It’s been ages since we last did anything other than studying.”
“I’m not sure…”
“Don’t come with your usual, rambling about how we shouldn’t have any fun before we finish,” Eden rolls her eyes.
“That’s not what I say. I just think that we have priorities.”
“I don’t know about you, but it’s a priority for me to have fun, so I’m down for a night out.
“I think I’m passing,” you mumble. You already made plans for the weekend with Harry, take a hike up the hills since the weather has been nice and it would be great to spend time together outside the house. The hiking routes are far away enough from town that uni students don’t like to take the hustle to drive all the way out so you’ll be fine being together outside.
“If you want to say that you have something planned with your mystery man, don’t even bother. If it’s not his birthday, we are overruling him,” Eden scoffs and you roll your eyes at her.
“Just go without me.”
“That’s not the same!” Nat whines. “Come on, Y/N. For once choose us!”
“That’s rude I choose you guys a lot of times!”
“Not since you’ve been spending half your life with some man and the other half in the library.”
“Yeah, we feel abandoned!” Nat pouts at you, trying to make you feel bad and in all honesty, she is succeeding.
“We can doll ourselves up, have fancy cocktails and all that, it’s gonna be fun! Come on, just one night! I can’t take another Saturday sitting in my room, reading my notes,” Eden growls and you sigh in defeat.
“Alright, I guess I’m in,” you mumble and your friends start cheering as if you just declared that men and women are going to get paid equally from now on.
You can tell Harry is bummed that you have to cancel your weekend plans, but he is also trying to be understanding.
“I couldn’t bring up a relevant argument so they made me say yes,” you growl when later that day you’re cuddling on his couch after dinner.
“S’fine,” he sighs, leaning down he pecks your lips shortly.
“Wish I could just tell them that I had plans with you,” you breathe out.
“Y/N…”
“I know!” you roll your eyes. “It’s just that it would be nice if I could at least tell them the truth.”
“We already talked about this,” he sighs.
“I know, but that doesn’t change the fact that it bothers me,” you point out. “Am I not allowed to feel that way?”
“You are, I just don’t get why you keep bringing it up when there’s literally nothing I can do about it,” he retorts.
“Well there is, you just choose not to.” And with that, you officially pick another fight with him.
It’s not that you enjoy fighting with him, not at all, but the situation is so not ideal and you find his overprotectiveness a little too much at times. You don’t understand why you can’t share it with your two closest friends. You could at least tell Sarah or the other guys, have anyone know about the two of you, but literally no one on Earth knows that you are a couple and it’s bugging you way more than it probably should.
“Why are you so damn keen on making others know about us? What does that have to do with anything?” he growls throwing his hands into the air, standing in the opposite end of the room as you keep pacing the floor, the urge to keep on moving taking over you.
“Because—“ you snap, but stop yourself. You know if you say it out loud, he’ll think you’re stupid.
“Because what?!”
“Because i-it makes me feel like we are not even real! I can’t talk about us, I can’t touch you outside of this house, no one knows we are a thing and it’s so fucking nerve-wrecking, Harry!” you break down, feeling your throat closing up. You didn’t mean to get emotional over this, but you’ve been bottling it up for a while now.
Harry’s shoulder fall forward as he sees the change in you, the heat of the fight long forgotten. He crosses the room, hands reaching up to cup your face in his palms, his thumbs running across the soft skin under your eyes as he wipes the tears away.
“Baby, I know. You think I don’t want to show you off? I want to hold your hand and just take a walk with you, kiss you whenever I want to, show all the horny fratboys on campus that you’re taken. I know it’s hard, but we really don’t have a choice until the end of the semester.”
He gently kisses the tip of your nose before pulling you to his chest, your arms circle around his waist as you bury your face into the crook of his neck, trying to stop your sobs.
“I’m sorry. I really wish it was all different,” he murmurs, kissing into your hair softly.
“No, I’m sorry for bitching about this all the time. I knew what we were getting into,” you exhale sharply. “It just… really sucks.”
“It does. But we just have to be patient.”
You manage to put the fight behind and move on in peace, but a tiny thought remains buzzing in the very back of your mind. What happens when you finish school? Will it all be different? Harry will still be a professor and if people see you around together, they will know you were one of his students. What’s gonna be the difference? If he is so on edge now, something is telling you he won’t be changing dramatically and it concerns you. A lot.
Not willingly, but you go out with Nat and Eden on Saturday. You go to a place that’s quite popular between students, you can most likely always find familiar faces from lecture halls and classes. It’s close to campus and more on the cheap side, the perfect spot for uni students for a night of fun.
As expected, you run into some people from school and they invite the three of you to sit with them at their table which comes in handy, because there’s no empty place by the time you arrive.
One drink follows the other and you easily get tipsy especially because you skipped on dinner before heading out. Though you weren’t in the mood for tonight, you find yourself enjoying the conversation and the company. It really has been long since the last time you went out with the girls and it’s nice to spend some time with them without the books and notes.
A debate starts about whose course one of the boys, Jace should take next semester.
“Professor Peltz is fucking boring, dude,” Nat growls, taking a sip from her drink. “Had him last semester, I could barely stay awake during his lectures.”
“Yeah, but they say he gives good grades easily,” Jace argues.
“Okay, but who else can you choose from again?” Lydia, a girl who lived a few doors down from you when you lived in a dormitory your first year.
“Um, Professor Makley and Professor Styles.”
You freeze at the mention of Harry, especially upon hearing Lydia’s reaction.
“Jace, choose Professor Styles! He is so fucking hot!”
“Not that it matters to me, Lyd,” Jace chuckles.
“Oh come on, I know even guys think he is hot.”
You feel like an intruder in the conversation, keeping quiet as you listen to her rave about how hot she finds Harry. It’s like you are eavesdropping on something that wasn’t meant for your ears, but it’s just the guilt bubbling inside you once again, because you know you won’t be able to say a word without having to lie.
“She has a point,” another guy, Garrett chimes into the conversation. “The man is handsome and I’m not even ashamed to admit it.”
“See?” Lydia chuckles. “He is sexy and smart, the whole package. I’ve been daydreaming about him since first year.”
You catch Eden’s look, but you just busy yourself with gulping from your vodka cranberry, feeling uncomfortable in the situation but not even for the reason she thinks. Eden must think it’s weird because you had an actual thing with Harry, but the truth is… that thing is still very much ongoing.
“I would let that man do whatever he wants with me,” Lydia adds sighing longingly, and you are having a hard time to hold your tongue. Unfortunately, you don’t succeed.
“Not sure he wants anything to do with you,” you mumble into your drink and though you hoped your comment would stay unnoticed, but you are out of luck.
“You don’t know that for sure,” Lydia slyly replies, a bit too full of herself for your liking. Yes, she is pretty and definitely doesn’t have problem with guys, but she is a little too confident about Harry if you’re being honest.
“I’m sorry?” you ask with a soft, bit annoyed chuckle.
“I’m just saying that we’ll never know who he finds attractive, because we all know he keeps himself so far from his students.”
“Yeah, maybe because he is not interested in any of his students,” you point out.
“As if he would ever make a move on any of us,” she snorts and you are losing your temper. You shouldn’t have had so much to drink, because now you really can’t hold your tongue.
“You can never know, Lydia. You can’t know if he acts the way he does because he is just trying to be professional or because he is, and consider this, not interested in you. Maybe he would actually act up on his feelings but you’re just not his type.”
Your comment is more like just a harsh comeback to Lydia’s words, but Nat and Eden kind of catch on that something is up with you. Ignoring their questioning looks you chug down your drink and soon excuse yourself to get some fresh air. No surprise that they follow you like puppies.
“Girl, what was that inside?” Nat asks as the three of you stand near the entrance of the bar, a few smoking guests littering the area.
“I have no idea what you are talking about,” you mumble, clearly avoiding to look at any of them, wrapping your arms around your upper body as if you were trying to keep your shit together physically.
“You snapped at Lydia for saying Professor Styles might have a thing for her,” Eden points out, but you just bite the inside of your cheeks.
“Because it was bullshit.”
“Why does that matter to you? Not that you’re together with him or something,” Nat argues and you roll your lips into your mouth, trying to keep a straight face but they know you way better than that. They gasp at the same time, Eden grabbing your forearm forcefully that makes you scowl.
“Hey! That hurts!” you whine, but she couldn’t care less.
“Are you fucking around with Professor Styles?” Nat whisper yells at you, eyes wider than ever.
“I mean… we’re not fucking around,” you mumble, looking down at your shoes as you kick the dirt around. “We’re kinda serious.”
“Holy fucking shit!” Eden snaps, drawing some attention at her and you let out an awkward chuckle at the glances the three of you get. “Are you fucking joking right now?”
“No, I am… not,” you admit, feeling a little relieved that you finally said it, but you also feel like you let Harry down with it.
“How long?” Nat questions in shock.
“Since New Year’s Eve. So… almost four months.”
“So he is the one you’ve been seeing all this time? The guy you didn’t want to talk about?”
“Um, yeah. It’s not that I didn’t want to talk about him, we just agreed that it’s safer if no one knows.”
“I’m speechless, Y/N,” Eden shakes her head in disbelief. “I can’t fucking believe you kept it from us for this long!”
“I know, I felt so shitty, but it’s such a complicated situation, it’s so risky, we don’t want it to ruin us.”
“Obviously,” Nat nods understandingly. “And now I see why you snapped so harshly at Lydia.”
“I just couldn’t stand her talking like that. You guys have no idea how hard it is to keep every fucking thought to myself.”
“Why do I have a feeling it has a little more to it than to just Lydia drooling over Harry?” Nat arches an eyebrow at you, folding her arms over her chest.
“Yeah, you’ve been oddly tensed lately,” Eden agrees.
“It’s just pretty stressful to have a secret relationship, it causes a lot of tension. And I’ve been… I’m not sure anything is going to change after I graduate, if I’m being honest.”
“What do you mean?” Nat asks.
“I just…” you sigh, all your thoughts you kept to yourself flooding back to you at once, overwhelming you in a situation that’s already a bit too much to handle. “We keep saying that it’s gonna change when I graduate, but I don’t see it. He is so overprotective and even if I graduate, people will find out that I was once his student. And it might not be against the rules anymore, but we’ll be judged. I didn’t think it through before, but it’s now starting to be more and more clear for me and I just… don’t know if we can make it work.”
You feel the tears forming in your eyes, you’ve been keeping this to yourself for way too long now and saying it out loud just broke the dam. When Nat and Eden sees your lips trembling and the watery eyes you’re trying to blink away, they don’t hesitate to pull you into a tight hug.
“Aw, don’t cry! It makes me want to cry too!” Nat chuckles softly as they sandwich you between them.
“It just sucks so much, because I love him, but I feel like we met at the wrong time and place,” you sob, letting them crush you.
“It happens, baby. It happens. You’ll figure it out!” Eden kisses your forehead before they let go of you. “Want to go home?”
“It’s still early, don’t want to kill the party. I think I’ll just… head over to Harry’s for now. Is that okay?”
“Of course, do whatever makes you feel better,” Nat assures you, giving your hand a gentle squeeze.
“I’m sorry I was such a party pooper.”
You call yourself an Uber and text Harry that you are going over. Twenty minutes later you are walking up the stairs to his house and he opens the front door before you could even reach for the doorknob.
“Hey, baby,” he breathes out softly and you don’t say a word, just wrap your arms around his waist, burying your face into the crook of his neck. “Hey, what happened? Didn’t have a good time with your friends?” He delicately caresses your hair, walking the two of you inside so he can close the door before wrapping both his arms around you, holding you close to his chest.
“Don’t really want to talk about it,” you mumble and it’s the truth. You’re tired of these thoughts though you know you should talk to him about how you’ve been feeling about the two of you lately. Part of you is hoping something will just magically solve the whole situation and you won’t have to deal with it yourself.
Harry makes you a tea while you take a shower and once you are both in bed, you cuddle to his side while he reads some. You are just genuinely enjoying his closeness, because despite everything that’s been haunting you in connection with Harry, you really love this man. Like no one else before and the possibility of the two of you not making it long term scares you more than it probably should.
The next few weeks come and go in a sense of numbness. Following your emotional breakdown in front of the bar, you kind of push the whole thing to the back of your mind once again, putting all your focus on finishing school. Neither you nor Harry has the energy to put up more fights though you both can feel there’s a lot to talk about, but the end of the semester is just keeping you both way too busy to acknowledge the problems waiting on the corner.
At least there’s one less weight on your shoulders now that Nat and Eden know about you and Harry. You made them swear to their life they won’t tell anyone and you trust them to keep this heavy secret. They’ve been very supportive of the two of you, interrogated you one evening about everything that happened so far, they wanted to make sure Harry treats you the right way. No surprise, he does.
A few weeks before your state exam Harry extends his contract with the school to have him as a professor for another academic year so he is able to keep his visa as well.
You spend your last two weeks buried in your notes before your state exam and Harry gives you all the time and space you need, knowing well how much it means to you to earn the best grade possible.
When you are finally over your exam, you are celebrating at his place. He has bought a little cake and some champagne and you can’t wait to finally spend some time with him without having to worry about your studies.
“I’m proud of you, baby,” he smiles at you, clinking his glass against yours.
“Thank you, feels nice to be finally free,” you chuckle before taking a sip from the champagne.
“My smart girl, knew you’d kill all your exams.” He kisses your lips shortly before squeezing your hand. “How about I run a bath for us, we eat the cake in the tub and then we can watch a movie?”
“Sounds fantastic,” you smile at him before he disappears in the bathroom to get everything ready.
Finishing your champagne you wash the glass quickly and you’re about to cut the cake when your phone buzzes signaling that you’ve just gotten an email. As pull down the notification bar your lips part reading the first few lines. You open the whole thing and read through it eagerly.
It’s a job offer, but not just some lame one that also sounds sketchy at the same time. This one is from one of the biggest investigation offices in London and they are offering you a trainee position as a forensic document examiner with a possible secured spot on their team after one year. The money sounds amazing, the position is perfect, just what you’ve been dreaming of once you are done with school and they are looking forward to hear back from you about a possible interview in the near future.
“Alright, bath is coming together nicely, want to cut the ca—Wha’s up?” Harry questions upon returning from the bathroom, finding you staring at your phone’s screen with widened eyes.
“I, uhh—I just got a… a job offer,” you stutter, still rereading the lines, trying to find a sign that tells you it’s just a joke, but it seems completely genuine.
“What? Baby, that’s amazing!”
“Yeah,” you nod swallowing hard before you look up at him. “It’s in London.”
You watch his face fall from excited and happy to shocked and kind of panicky. You both know what that means, it doesn’t have to be said out loud. Harry just signed another year with the university that’s gonna tie him here for the next 12 months and if you accept the job you’ll be all the way across the world in the UK. Kind of ironic, him, the British guy stuck in the States while you, the American in the relationship, eager to go to the UK.
“That’s… wow. London.”
“Yeah, London,” you nod biting the inside of your cheeks.
“Are you… Are you gonna take it?”
“Well, they want an interview with me, but this is clearly a huge opportunity for me,” you say, not wanting to say the actual words. You feel like saying them would hit you harder than what you can take.
“It clearly is, it’s just that… You want to leave?” he breathes out, eyebrows knitting together.
“This is my only job offer and probably the best I’ll ever get.”
“So you do want to leave,” he forces and it’s pushing your limits.
“Career-wise, of course!” you finally say out loud, unwillingly.
“And what about everything else?”
“I clearly don’t want to leave everything else here, but I will never get a chance like this, Harry. This is the greatest push for someone like me, fresh out of school. I can have a secured spot in a year at a well-respected place. I’m not really in the position to reject offers like this.”
He exhales sharply, running a hand through his hair, clearly unsure about what to do or say in the situation on his hand. You can tell he has a lot to say, but you’re not sure you want to hear all of them.
“Say something?” you softly plead and his eyes meet yours again, filled with concern.
“I just… It took me by surprise, I guess.”
“I wasn’t expecting it either.”
“No, not the job offer,” he shakes his head.
“Then what?”
“That you are ready to leave so easily. It’s like you never even wanted to discuss a version where you stay here, you just decided that you are leaving and that’s it.”
“Did you hear me? I cannot pass on this opportunity, Harry.”
“I did hear you,” he nods, pressing his lips together. “I heard that you didn’t even think about saying no.”
“Why would I say no?”
“Because I’m here, Y/N!” he snaps. “Good to know that I’m not a factor when it comes to decisions as big as leaving the country!”
“You are, Harry, but I need to think about my future career now. I’m not planning to work at an office for the rest of my life and if I pass on this job I might never get anything as good as this one,” you explain, but it seems like the two of you are having two different conversations.
“But why do I feel like it was never an option for you to stay?”
You give him a confused look. He really doesn’t see your point.
“Okay, why was only I supposed to change plans for us? You coming to London doesn’t feel like an option either, why are you trying to turn this against me?”
“I just extended my contract, you know that.”
“I do, and also, while we are at it, you didn’t ask me about that either. You didn’t even wait for me to figure out what I want to do after school, you just assumed that I would be here, but I never said that.” You can tell it hit him hard in the chest but somehow still, he thinks he is right when he isn’t.
“How could have I known you’d want to move across the globe?” he throws his hands up into the air.
“You’re saying this as if I didn’t just get the email and I’ve been plotting this the whole fucking time!”
“I’m just saying that it’s a huge fucking step and you decided so easily, it says a lot about the nature of our relationship.”
“Why are you saying that?!” you snap at him. “Why are you trying to make me the bad guy?”
“I’m not! I’m just saying that it would have been nice if you at least pretended like it was up for debate. You know what it’ll do to us if you move to London.”
“Then come with me!”
“I can’t!” He raises his voice, clearly losing his temper. “I can’t break my contract and you know that too.”
“Well, I can’t afford to say no to the job either and if I’m being honest, I don’t think we could have made it work even if I stayed.” The words leave your mouth before you could think about them, and the cat is finally out of the bag. It seemingly shocked Harry and he is now staring at you with a blank expression, shoulders falling forward.
“What?” he breathes out and you can actually hear his heart breaking. You take a deep breath and rub your face with your palms, trying to collect your thoughts and not just blurt everything out.
“I’ve been thinking and… Even after I’m officially out of the school, people will know that I was your student if they see us together. And I know how important your reputation is for you so I would never put you through any of the shit we might get for us being together. People would judge, no matter what the situation is. I don’t… I just don’t think we can ever make it work here.”
He stays silent, just stares at you, taking in your words and once again, you wish you could read his mind. You almost start begging him to say something when he finally speaks up.
“So you think we don’t have a chance?”
“Not here… maybe not now. I feel like this has been the perfect example of wrong place, wrong time,” you quietly say, a pang of guilt in your tone, this is not how you planned on making this conversation. To be honest, you wished this never had to come, but you were out of luck.
Harry is awfully silent, it’s all over his face how broken he is and you feel the same. You have so much love for this man, yet fate decided you don’t get to share it with him the way you want.
Walking closer you cup his face in your palms, searching for his eyes until his green irises meet your gaze. You run your thumb across his cheekbones, the pads of your fingers gliding softly over the soft skin. His hands slowly find their way to your waist and he pulls you close to him as you kiss him tenderly, a silent confession about just how much you love him.
“I wanted this to work. I wanted this so badly,” he whispers against your lips, his fingers digging into your back as he keeps you tight in his hold.
“I know. Me too,” you smile at him bitterly.
The rest of the evening passes by silently. You take a bath together, finish the cake anyway though even the sweetness can’t help the pain you both feel. Then you lie in bed for hours, just touching and feeling each other, making the best out of the time you have left. It’s unsaid, but you both know your days together are coming to a close end. Kisses and touches turn into some passionate love making, both of you desperate to feel as close to each other as possible and then you fall asleep in each other’s arms.
If you’re being honest, it’s all a blur following that night. You fix up an interview with London a few days later and they are not shying out of telling you straightforward that they want you there, the job is yours. You have one last short conversation with Harry about you leaving, but it’s more like just a confirmation that yes, it is going to happen and that leaves you with only a few weeks left together before you are packing up to leave the country.
You spend every possible free minute together until graduation where you finally get your degree. Your whole family comes and they cheer on you proudly, Harry standing in the crowd a little farther in the back, but still with a proud smile, a hint of gloominess in his beautiful green eyes. A week later you officially move out of your shared apartment with the girls, it’s a sobbing goodbye since all three of you are leaving in different directions following your graduation. You spend your last two weeks before your departure at home, spending as much time with your family as possible since you won’t be able to see them too often once you leave. Though your mom is dying to take you to the airport to say her final goodbye, you decided to give that time to Harry. He said he would drive to your hometown, pick you up and take you to the airport and you already know it’s gonna turn you into an emotional mess.
Leaving everything behind is hard, but having to say goodbye to Harry is the worst. It’s been a whole emotional rollercoaster for the both of you to get to this point and neither of you are ready to say goodbye, but this is what needs to happen.
That morning, you hug your parents, sister and brother tightly after you load Harry’s car with your two huge suitcases that have your whole life packed in them. You asked your family not to ask any questions about Harry and luckily, they kept quiet the whole time he was there, just treating him as a friend. You couldn’t take having to explain to them who he really is and how you met him, that’s gonna be another conversation for the future when you don’t feel like you’re about to start crying the moment you open your mouth.
The ride to the airport is silent, Harry holds your hand, your glued together palms lying on your lap the whole time. You haven’t even left but you already miss him so much.
Arriving he helps you bring all your stuff inside and patiently waits until you check your baggage in, leaving you with just your carry-on. Standing near the security check, the final moment finally comes and as soon as you look into his eyes you start bawling your eyes out.
“Oh baby, come ‘ere,” he breathes out, pulling you into his arms.
“I’m so sorry, Harry. I told you we would make everything right, but I couldn’t,” you sob into his chest as he holds you tight. You feel like if he let go of you, you’d just turn into a puddle at his feet.
“It wasn’t your fault,” he soothes you, his fingers threading through your hair.
“But it feels like it was,” you choke out. Harry leans back and takes your puffy cheeks between his warm palms, looking deep into your eyes.
“It wasn’t. As you said, it was just a matter of wrong time and place. But I think we brought the best out of it.”
“So… you don’t regret it?” you softly ask, eyebrows knitted together in concern.
“Absolutely not,” he smiles at you kindly. “I loved every moment of it. And I love you.”
You notice how he didn’t use past tense when he said he loves you and you can’t decide if it aches your heart more or fills you with joy. A little bit both of them.
“I love you too,” you whisper before pressing your lips against his, savoring them one last time before you leave everything behind.
“Maybe we’ll meet again,” he smiles sweetly when he pulls back, tugging your hair behind your ear with a gentle move.
“I really hope,” you chuckle through your tears. “Take care, Harry,” you tell him, pecking his lips just once more.
“You too, baby,” he smiles, his hands falling to his sides as he lets go of you.
Turning around you walk into security and as you go with the line towards the gates, you glance back one last time. Harry is standing in the exact same spot, eyes glued to you as he watches you disappear from his sight.
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It feels like the meeting is never coming to its end. You exchange a look with Jasmine, who seems just as tired and done with this two hours long discussion as you are. She grabs her phone from the table and you watch her something type out before she eyes at your device, signaling that she just texted you.
Jas: I need alcohol after this day. Want to have a drink with me after work?
Y/N: YES PLEASE!!!!!!!
You see her smile at her screen before both of you return to your boss at the front, talking about a possible upcoming case.
“And last but not least, I want to take a moment to bring light to the excellent work Y/N, our new full-time colleague did on the Santiago case. The police were highly satisfied with the fast and precise work you did. This was your first official case since you’ve decided to accept our offer to become a full member of our team and transferred from your position as a trainee. Congrats!” William, your boss nods in your way with a proud smile as a round of applause cheers for you from your colleagues.
“You go girl!” Jasmine mouths you from across the table and you just chuckle shaking your head.
The meeting finally wraps up and everyone goes on with their day. You are walking back to your office with Jasmine by your side. Your offices are next to each other and you started working here just three weeks apart. She is the same age as you and was approached the same way as well, it’s just that she moved all the way from Australia. The two of you have grown quite close, starting a new life at the same time in a foreign country, it easily brought you together.
“So are we leaving early for those drinks or what?” she asks poking your side.
“How early?”
“I don’t know, like fifteen minutes? Come on, it’s Friday, everyone leaves early!” You shake your head chuckling at her. She can be so restless sometimes, but it’s just the right amount that she can push you out of the comfort zone just enough.
“Alright.”
“Cool, I’ll come banging on your door,” she winks at you before disappearing for her usual coffee break.
It’s two in the afternoon, you still have a few hours ahead of you and some caffeine sounds perfect actually. Though the coffee at the office is excellent, you’ve grown to like this small place nearby, a family owned business that offers the best you’ve ever had.
You grab your bag from your office and head out for a quick coffee run. The walk to the café is freshening, the weather has been treating you well lately, the Sun is beaming and you can only hope you won’t wake up to pouring rain the next morning.
You think back to how lost you were feeling just a year ago, when all of this around you were so new and a little too much at once. One month into your time in London you even thought about quitting and moving back home. You felt alone and broken, yearning after everything you left behind. Your friends, family, loved ones, everything that was so far away from you.
It took you long weeks, even months to get used to your new life and now you can’t even imagine yourself anywhere else. It doesn’t miss you don’t miss terribly the life you had still, but now you have a lot to be happy about here as well.
Waiting at a crossroad, you find yourself twirling around the strawberry ring on your finger, your thumb fidgeting with it like every time you think about your home. You glance down at it and take a deep breath before the lamp turns green and you continue your walk to the café.
It’s not rush hours so there are only a few people lingering around the small place. You don’t have to think about what you are getting, James, the barista already knows your usual and starts making it right away as you swipe your card paying your drink.
You stand at the side, waiting for your coffee, staring out the window, watching people pass by on this lovely afternoon. Your gaze stops on an old lady sitting on a nearby bench, feeding a group of pigeons and you smile as a little girl runs through the birds, making them fly away instantly. The old lady just smiles at the girl, not holding a grudge that she just scared the birds away.
Your eyes move away, watching businessmen come and go, kids going home from school, wearing their school uniforms, everything just feels so… peaceful.
You are almost about to turn away from the window when your gaze falls on a tall figure near the Sainsbury’s across the road and your lips part as you catch a glimpse of a tattooed arm you know all too well. You blink once, twice, three times, waiting for your eyes to make sure it’s the person you think it is.
Harry is standing right there, holding a little bag of groceries, eyes glued to the screen of his phone, oblivious to your shocked gaze on him. Your feet move before your brain could think it through, they take you out of the café and you stand in the middle of the sidewalk as you call out for him.
“Harry!”
His head snaps up at his name, eyes looking around, searching for the source before they finally find you, a shocked, but seemingly joyful expression plastering over his handsome face. He is quick to shove his phone into his pocket before he watches both ways and runs across the road to meet you on the other side. You can’t push your smile down as you watch him approach you, his tall, fit figure getting closer and closer until he is standing right in front of you, watching you in awe.
“Hey,” he breathes out, both of you a little unsure of what to do, how to greet each other.
It’s been months since you last talked. After your departure you kept in contact, you couldn’t just distance yourself from him so abruptly, but the thousands of miles between the two of you made it almost impossible to maintain a working connection, the time zones, all the work you both were buried under and just life itself made you drift away from each other.
But he is now standing in front of you and though he looks slightly different, he is still the Harry you know and love. He is your Harry.
“What… what are you doing here?” you ask, finally finding your voice.
“Did you forget I’m British?” you teases you and you roll your eyes.
“I mean, are you visiting family or something?”
“I uhh…” he glances down at his feet before his eyes meet yours again. “I’m actually back.”
“What do you mean?”
“My contract ended in July and I didn’t… I didn’t extend it. I came back a few weeks ago.”
Your lips part at the information. Harry is in London, he is now in the same city as you, for the first time in a whole year.
“Really? That’s… wow.” There’s too much you want to tell and ask him, yet you stand there, blinking at him, still lost in the feeling of seeing him for the first time again.
“I actually wanted to contact you when I got back, but I wasn’t… I wasn’t sure how you’d feel about that,” he admits with a nervous chuckle and your eyes soften over him.
“What do you mean? I would have loved it if you called.”
“It’s just that we haven’t talked in a while and I didn’t know… I didn’t know where you’re standing about me.”
“Well, seems like fate did it for you,” you smile at him warmly. “I would love to catch up. I have to head back to work now, but maybe later?”
“What about after work? When are you getting off?”
“I finish at 5.”
“I can meet you at your work if you text me the address.”
“That would be great,” you nod smiling. “My number is still the same, so you’ll know it’s me.”
“Great,” he nods, the corners of his mouth curling up in a boyish smirk. You are just now realizing how much you’ve missed him.
“I, um…” You’re trying to find the right words, still feeling overwhelmed about the sudden run-in, but at last you decide to go for a hug.
Your arms wrap around his waist, he hesitates for a moment before wrapping you in his tight embrace, pressing his cheek against the top of your head. A shiver runs down your spine as the sense of home washes over you all at once, the warmth of Harry’s body making your heart flutter. Unfortunately, the moment must come to an end. His arms fall from around you, just like they did at the airport when you said goodbye to each other over a year ago.
“I’ll… see you later then,” he smiles as you are backing towards the entrance of the café.
“Yeah, later,” you nod and turning around you walk inside.
Arriving back to the office you drop by Jasmine’s office to tell her that you have to postpone your plans after work.
“What is more important than getting drunk with me?” she gasps dramatically.
“I ran into… I met Harry,” you tell her. You told her all about Harry one evening when you were out, just a few months into your stay. It was one of those days when you were feeling extremely homesick, or maybe you just missed him terribly.
“What? Your professor ex?” she asks with widened eyes.
“Yeah.”
“Okay, you are forgiven. Go and get the man back!”
“What?” you chuckle. “We just met after a year, how do you know I want him back? Maybe I just want to catch up with him,” you say, but it’s an obvious and blatant lie and you both know that. Jasmine gives you a look.
“Please, you are still so obviously in love with the man, don’t even try to convince me otherwise.”
You don’t protest, just bite into your bottom lip. You really are in love with him, or the version you knew a year ago. He could be an entirely different person now so you can’t be sure if your feelings are the same about the man you met today.
“Have fun with him and then tell me all about it after, okay?” she beams and you just nod, leaving her to finish her work.
As time is slowly passing by you find yourself growing nervous about seeing Harry. That short little conversation on the street was not enough to calm your nerves. What is he like now? Is he the same? Does he have new hobbies? Is he as happy to see you as you are to see him? What will he think of you? What if he doesn’t like you after all this time?
You try to push the questions to the back of your mind, not wanting to overwhelm yourself too much to the point where you chicken out of seeing him. When you’re on your way down following his text that he is waiting for you in front of the building, you are trying to keep yourself together and remind yourself that it’s just Harry, he might be a little different, but he is still kind of the same.
Luckily, the moment you spot him waiting a few feet away from the entrance, you forget about everything else, he is the only one to exist. He envelopes you in a hug when you arrive, smiling at you warmly.
“Hi, ready to go?” he kindly asks and you nod.
You settle for a nearby bar you’ve actually been to with Jasmine before. Harry insists on paying for the first round of drinks as the two of you settle in a secluded booth at the back. When he is standing at the bar you catch yourself watching him in awe. The situation is quite odd, could have never happened probably back home, the two of you casually out for a drink.
“What’s gotten you so smiley?” he asks upon returning, sitting across you.
“I was just thinking how this is the first time we are out, just the two of us.”
Harry smiles softly, probably appreciating it just the same.
The next couple of hours you both try to share anything and everything that has happened in the past year. He tells you about his last year as a professor and him not extending his contact. Coming back to London he has joined a research group for a marketing company, using his excellent knowledge to analyze human behavior in connection with different type of ads.
“It’s a lot different from being a college professor ain’t it?” you tease him and he nods chuckling.
“Guess I wanted some change. But it’s been nice, I enjoy doing a lot of research and experiments.”
Then you tell him about your time as a forensic document examiner, all the different cases you worked on and how it has been, living in London on your own. He listens to your tales about everything you’ve done with Jasmine, the concerts and karaoke bars you’ve been to and just generally your life overseas.
“Sounds like you’ve found your place, then,” he says smiling softly.
“I guess. Wasn’t an easy transition, but I’m feeling good now,” you nod. “But that doesn’t mean I don’t miss my past,” you add.
His eyes wander down to your hands that are fidgeting with your almost empty glass. You see how they stop over the ring and he seems surprised as he reaches out, takes your hand in his and runs his thumb over the little strawberries.
“You’re still wearing the ring,” he states.
“Of course,” you smile and when he is about to let go of your hand, you grab it and hold it, needing to feel his touch.
You wanted to run back home so many times because you were missing him too badly, missed his voice, his eyes, his touch, everything and now, out of nowhere, he is here with you again, far away from the place where it all started and had to end for a while, still making you feel like home, no matter where you are.
At one point, you move to sit beside him in the booth. You just keep sharing and sharing even things you’ve talked about on the phone before. You’re just soaking each other in. His arm soon moves around your shoulders and you gladly lean into his side, placing a hand to his thigh, sparkles running through your body.
“I love this,” you hum to yourself upon finishing your last drink.
“Love what?”
“Being out with you without a worry. I always dreamt of this and it’s just… so natural. I wish we got to experience it before.”
“As you said, that was a wrong time and place. Wasn’t our fault.”
You lift your head, eyes meeting his curious green irises as he smiles down at you kindly. You’ve missed that smile, it still makes your heart skip a beat, just like at the beginning.
“And do you think it’s the right time and place now?” you prompt the question.
“It’s definitely… better,” he chuckles softly. “Unless you are seeing someone, because now would be the best time to tell me.”
“I’m not,” you shake your head smirking. “Tried to go on dates, but truth is… none of them were you. I gave up after a few terrible attempts.”
“I didn’t even try,” he shyly smiles. “I just… knew no one would make me as happy as you did. As you always do.”
Pushing yourself up a bit, you rest your forehead against his as he closes his eyes, his arm around your shoulder tightens and his other hand rests on your thigh, pulling you closer. Your palm slides up his chest and neck until you’re cupping his cheek. You place a soft lingering kiss to the corner of his mouth, testing the waters out, seeing how he reacts though nothing that happened tonight tells you he wants to keep his distance.
He moves his face, nose nudging against you before his lips find yours in a kiss you’ve been longing for since you left him behind at the airport over a year ago. Your fingers lace through his hair, pulling him towards you as if he could escape from your hold any moment, but he is definitely here to stay. Your lips clash again and again, savoring each other, eagerly trying to make up for the time you lost since your departure. You melt into his arms, moving your legs across his lap as he pulls you to his lap in the booth, partially hidden from the rest of the bar, wrapped up in your little bubble. He tastes like home, his kisses feel like the first warm rays of sunshine after a long and cold winter, the only thing you couldn’t really get yourself over this whole year. Because you’ve become good at pushing your feelings down to the point where you could easily carry on, but he was always in the corner of your mind, making you wonder if you’ll ever meet again and if you do, will it be the same as before?
It’s not, because it’s better. The burdens and banters that tied you both down a year ago are now long gone, you have all the time and space in the world, nothing is restricting you. You can touch him and kiss him whenever and wherever you want. There’s no more sneaking around, no one here knows who you are and who Harry used to me to you. Here, you’re just another lovesick couple, so into each other it’s almost insane.
When he pulls back his forehead stays rested against yours as you both are trying to catch your breath. His hand runs up and down your thigh, the warmth of his palm melting your body under his soft touch.
“I love you,” he breathes out, eyes meeting yours.
“You still do?” you ask with a small smile, heart beating in your throat.
“I never stopped loving you,” he admits and you let out a shaky breath, pulling him down for a short kiss.
“Not even when I was an ocean away from you?”
“No,” he chuckles shaking his head. “If that’s possible, I loved you even more when you were away. I realized how much you mean to me and I could only hope you weren’t moving on without me.”
“I could never,” you smile at him softly. “I love you too much to do that.”
“You have no idea how much I missed you say that,” he breathes out with a soft chuckle and you kiss his lips shortly, assuring him that you feel the same way. “So… are we going to try again?”
“Do you want to?”
“There’s nothing I want more, baby,” he truthfully admits, his gaze softening at you as he brushes a loose strand of hair behind your ear. “Do you want to?”
“Of course,” you smile at him widely. “I think it’s settled.”
Thank you for reading, please like and reblog if you enjoyed it!
#harry#styles#harry styles#harry styles fanfiction#harry style fanfic#harry styles imagine#harry styles au#harry styles oneshot#harry styles one shot#harry styles x you#harry styles x y/n#harry styles x reader#professor!harry#professor!harry au#harry styles smut#harry styles fluff#harry styles angst
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Dark Rise Book Review
Dark Rise Book Review by C.S. Pacat
I have been thinking about this book for days now.
The sequel to this novel shot to the top of my Christmas list as soon as I was done reading it, it’s just too bad that it won’t be out for probably another year or two. The thought makes me want to weep, but at least re-reading is always an option.
People always ask me what my favorite books of all time are. I’ve told several people that, for me, a mark of a good book is when it sticks with me, when it sticks in my head.
It’s when the characters won’t leave me alone, when it inspires my own creativity and imagination, when I hear songs and immediately think of scenes from the book and attach it to events.
This does not lie mutually exclusive with “excellent” books. I’ve read trash stories that have had this effect on me. I’ve also read classic novels and while I appreciate them and I enjoyed them, I didn't have the after effects of the book lingering on my mind for days or weeks or even months afterwards.
I finished Dark Rise by C.S. Pacat several days ago and It’s still at the forefront of my thoughts like a song stuck in your head.
The strange thing is that I don’t think it’s a perfect book. It has problems, especially with pacing and world building, but I still find myself fascinated.
That, to me, is a great book.
Now, you might have heard of C.S. Pacat before, either online or even from my reviews. Last year, I read the Captive Prince trilogy for the first time. You can read my review of the trilogy here.
I expected it to be meretricious, but to my delight and surprise I found the Captive Prince trilogy to be well-written, engaging, lovingly crafted, and leaving a lasting impression on me-just like Dark Rise.
If that’s not C.S. Pacat’s super power, I don’t know what is. Simply put, I like her stuff. It’s dark, it’s interesting, it’s different, and it sticks with me. I’ve even felt the cravings to re-read The Captive Prince trilogy since it’s been a year and that desire has only doubled since Dark Rise.
There’s just something about C.S. Pacat’s work that my mind can’t leave alone and I’m not complaining.
First, I don’t normally mention book covers, as I’ve found that it truly doesn’t depict the inside, but I was immediately drawn to Dark Rise’s cover. I actually saw the cover first, the author second, and third, pulled out my wallet to purchase it a nanosecond later.
The cover just draws me in. From the haunted look of the character on the cover, to the lettering and colors and bold font. I loved everything about it and fortunately, for me, it did depict the inside material quite well.
The plot itself isn’t all that original.
It’s a very classic light vs. dark, good vs. evil kind of story.
I was trying to explain the story to my brother over Thanksgiving and when I finished, he remarked that it sounded like Star Wars and Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter. He’s not wrong because at its core, Dark Rise is a very classic bad guys versus good guys kind of story.
However, it’s the characters, the writing itself, and the end that really left a mark upon me.
The actual plotline of dark and light is very Kingdom Hearts where they literally mean dark as a force and light as a force. The Dark King versus the Lady of Light. They are not ephemeral or symbolic.
The Dark King is named as such for his control over shadows and monsters, and the Light for its control over the same. There are some odd interwoven pieces of lore like unicorns, but otherwise the world itself felt pretty par for the course.
The characters and the ending is what really shined for me.
I like all of the characters. As I’ve remarked time and time before, that is actually quite an astronomical thing. I do think that Pacat introduces a horde of characters very quickly and it is a bit peeving to switch POVs because my curiosity was not quite quenched.
I still feel like I’ve only really gotten to know the surface of most of these characters, but I find myself inherently wanting more.
But that’s the thing: I want more.
I’m dying to learn about these characters, their relationships to one another, and where they go from here. Will felt like a very archetypal hero before suddenly he wasn’t, Violet felt very tomboy and rough until she changed, Justice was just amazing, Cyprian developed a heart, Katherine showed she had worth on the inside as well as the out, a unicorn appeared in the flesh, Simon’s darkness, Tom’s cruelty, James. Just James.
Honestly, half of the intrigue comes from James alone.
There are so many interesting characters and I want more of it right now.
This, in large part, was hugely due to the ending. I knew a twist was coming, it always does, but I also believed that the climax was behind me. And I was right, but I was also wrong, because the so-called twist I was expecting was actually very surprising and downright insane.
It made me so interested in what’s coming next and dying to see the characters, which is quite a plot twist if I do say so myself. My brain certainly felt twisted.
The beginning of the novel starts off quite strong, but the middle does get quite muddy. This is when Pacat spends the most time world building and depositing her exposition and while it is necessary, it is a bit bland and boring to get through. It would have been less of a chore if the exposition had been more interspersed throughout.
But when the ending does come through, it comes through with shining colors and the forces of dark and evil using their full potential and power which left me breathless and unable to contain my excitement for the installments to come.
Which they will.
And I can’t wait.
Recommendation: This isn’t a perfect book, but it was one I enjoyed immensely. C.S. Pacat does not disappoint and more than any book I’ve read this year, I’m more excited to read the next installment of Dark Rise than anything else and that is the highest praise I can give it.
Read it. Then read The Captive Prince trilogy. And then re-read them again and bask in the interesting worlds and words that Pacat has created.
Score: 8/10
#dark rise#cs pacat#the captive prince#LGBTQ fiction#lgbtqbook#book blog#book review#top books#favorite books#teen books#best seller books#Book Recommendations#YA Book Review#book rec#book recs#8/10
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