#they're all just so...so...why you gotta be so complex and show that humans are never just victim or villain? | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

eptbw · 1 month

Text

fallout show thoughts mostly abt the lore. major spoilers for the show, particularly ep 8. not very well put together and its mostly just me scratching my head/complaining lol

imo the show does it's best to not technically retcon fo1/2/nv, but to effectively retcon them by getting rid of everything they made and make moot what they cannot literally bomb.

it's just that the og fallouts/fnv are post-post-apocalypses about rebuilding and the themes are about like. cycles of violence and how to break them in order to rebuild, human nature, fascism, society, etc.

bethesda's fallout is about uhhhh. how war never changes (they do not particularly feel like examining this theme in detail). and how greedy corporations will lead to the end of the world. basically they're taking the satire of the united states and throwing it out and going all in on the satire about corporations + a teensy bit the military industrial complex (think west-tek).

thats why vault tec dropped the bombs, when previously the great war was less about pointing fingers and more about bearing the sins of the father and how ultimately none of the lines drawn in the pre-war world matter now. it's all just ash and dust. cause when you're making a commentary(?) on rich people using regular people as pawns & guinea pigs then it does matter that vault tec did it + that they had allies in every other major pre-war american corporation. side note: i dont like this at all btw.

besides changing the fundamental themes of the franchise 5 games in though bethesda's fallout mostly just wants to be about nukes + the post apocalypse. they want to tell stories about scavengers in dirt shacks eating each other. fo1/2/nv don't allow for that kind of worldbuilding. i cant speak on 1 or 2 as i haven't played them, but for example fnv is about how societies get made & the strengths and weakness of them, and which type of society you the player think would be best for making a new world with.* so thats why they literally exploded the ncr. cant have dirt shack cannibals when there's a president.

the only thing that feels overtly spiteful(?) to me is that i can't figure out why they're even touching california, and not just fucking around on the east coast like they previously have. or the midwest or something if they're sick of the east

my best guess is either A) spite bc obsidian did it better than them (tbh i dont think this.) or B) they got sick of fielding "whys the west coast got multiple developed societies but the east coast has just the enclave over and over. whys the east coast so much less developed than the ncr 200 years later when rhe ncr was being founding a mere 70~ years after the war? whys megaton a scrap heap when new vegas has working plumbing?" type questions and so they nuked it to hastily cover their asses like "see! nothing develops in the wasteland! humans love to murder and war never changes B)". instead of just leaving the west coast alone and unacknowledged like fo3/4 did (i also dont fully believe this but i dont have any clue what else it could be)

the trouble besides all of this sucking and being, at a very generous best, stupid as fuck, is that the new themes/villains aren't even consistent cause like. why did vault tec nuke shady sands from a themes perspective. whats that add to anything. i guess it ties into our other new(ish) theme of "humans are inherently violent little cockroaches"

not to mention if theyre going all "war never changes humans love murder" they dont even really acknowledge Maximus' revenge plot or his repeated inaction (aka his fundamental character motivation /trait b4 he halfheartedly discovers that oysters are yummy or whatever). but im getting close to just starting to complain that its a really stupid boring one dimensional theme + i didnt care much for the characters (they arent objectively bad or anything it's just me)

also shout out to the only plot/motivation bethesda can consistently think of in the wastes being "gotta find my family" like some little failed vin diesel clone. also shout out to their preoccupation with pre-war america and their obsession with characters being 200 years old and how that ties directly into their lack of desire to let the setting progress. but thats an entirely different thing lol.

*fnv is also about needing to let go of the past if you desire to move forward (the concept of "old world blues" + the actual think tank/big empty -> dead money -> lonesome road) and bethesda doesn't want to let go of the pre-war bc they think its cool or something idk. they also refuse to let the societies of the games develop. which makes it especially funny that they half retconned fnv, destroyed the strip, and made hoover dam obsolete all in one fell swoop. its better theme writing than the game!

** i feel obligated to mention that bethesda arent the only people who think fallout should forever remain a post-apocalypse cause chris avellone famously disliked the post-post-apocalypse of the ncr, got told to shut up bc everyone else (rightly) thought a post-post-apocalypse was a good idea, and then he wanted to nuke the NCR in lonesome road and got told to shut up again. but avellone didnt work on the show and doesnt work for bethesda so :P

btw them saying fiends are just people who eat people was just mean. kicking me while im down :(

#.txt #be nice if this doesnt make sense im exhausted and mostly just rambling #theres so much else to say but. blegh #fallout show spoilers #fallout tv spoilers

8 notes · View notes

nebulouscoffee · 8 months

Note

Ok for the series ask game thingy I shall ask you… TNG and Enterprise

Ooh, this should be fun! Thank youuu :D

TNG

Favourite character: ahh this is legitimately hard! I love all the main seven leads so much. Maybe Deanna? I think she's heaps more interesting and complex than she comes across at first glance- I love her difficult relationship to her Human and Betazoid halves, I love her complicated dynamic with her mom, her state of cultural drift, her very nebulous sense of self that she's always just a little too afraid to confront head on, her compassion, her self-awareness, her warmth, and of course her occasional barbs that just never miss

Second favourite character: gosh this is even harder!! I feel like it's either Data or Geordi, but then I remember Worf. I adore Worf... but then there's also Beverly.... Okay, okay, I'm reasonably sure it's Data. I just really love his arc, his multifaceted relationships with the other characters, and the complexity of the questions his existence and chosen life raise. Some of the series' best episodes are centred around him. Not much else to say- I just love the guy! (And I am laughing so hard picturing your face while reading this. Sorry Fancy! Lmao... Unfortunately I am a Data girlie😂)

Least favourite character: uhhh maybe that Okona guy from 'The Outrageous Okona', I haven't actually rewatched that episode in sooo many years and I think he might be why haha (also every single guest character in 'Code of Honour' though that's not so much a case of me hating them as wishing the writers had never come up with them)

The character I'm most like: None of them!! They all joined the space military lmao I would never join the space military!! Also they're all very smart, like top-of-their-fields smart. TNG where is the representation for us mediocre dumbasses. I demand more mediocre dumbasses on the Enterprise! (OKAY if I had to pick, it would probably be Geordi but only when he's goofing off- or Riker when he's rejecting a promotion so that he can remain with his besties)

Favourite pairing: Beverly and her lamp🥰 okay, okay, Troisha from the non-canon ships, Troi/Riker from canon

Least favourite pairing: Deanna/every man she was ever sent to single episode romance hell with, special shoutout to that one dude from 'The Price' for making me watch that looooong as hell foot massage sequence *strained laughter*

Favourite moment: Gonna be a cliche and say that poker scene from the finale. Yup, they actually managed to end the show on... my favourite scene from the whole show. Good job, TNG! (If I'm being honest it's everything from the climax with the three Enterprises working together to Q's line on how exploration is not about conquering or charting territory but discovering new depths of the soul (good stuff👌) and the gang vowing not to let themselves drift apart like they did in that possible future. This is where TNG ended in my heart tbh! Every other appearance is like schrödinger's canon to me; it's canon when I need it to be, and fanfic generally lol

Rating out of 10: Objectively, it's a 7.5/10 from me. Its highs are SO high, but its lows are just so hilariously low- it had a rough start, there's no getting around that, and it's frequently clueless about the inherent imperialism and colonialist undertones of its premise, plus it almost never lets its female characters shine the way they deserve to. However this show also turned my life around so it gets a 100/10 by the power of the blorbolense😌 thank you for existing TNG!

Enterprise

Favourite character: Hoshiiii we love an overworked gifted child prodigy who grew up learning to speak soooo many languages but never had anyone to talk to, only now learning to relax and make friends and figure things out as an adult on the ship of the unhinged

Second favourite character: I mean it's gotta be T'Pol! She is far and away the most interesting character on the show imo, and despite the constant terrible horrible so-bad-it's-funny attempts to objectify her she manages to surpass the material and contain so much depth. She's an alien among humans and a deeply scandalous weirdo and pioneer among her own people, and I love her struggles navigating those two spheres throughout the show <3

Least favourite character: the ever-present air of post-9/11 military propaganda. And if you're going to argue that that's not an actual character on the show, I beg to differ. Straight up had more lines than Travis Mayweather!

The character I'm most like: Maybe Phlox? I'm not much like anyone on this show honestly, but in general he's a chilled out dude just doing his own thing. I feel like that's me right now

Favourite pairing: T'Poshi hell yeah!!! I know the characters barely interact in canon but it really is actually that deep you guys. I love it! For some reason all my favourite ships seem to involve these eager young super smart friendly compassionate officers falling for much older buttoned-up aliens who are obviously culturally isolated, and then connecting in a way that reveals the older alien (who might have a drug problem) is actually a social outcast in their own society whose superiority they won't shut up about and the younger officer actually has a more complicated relationship to their culture than first apparent thanks to an overbearing family, and they are strikingly similar shades of lonely. Hmmm....

Least favourite pairing: I don't think I have one lol! I don't feel strongly enough about any of the canon pairings and fanon ships don't affect me because I don't really engage with that side of Enterprise fandom (not saying this like a snobby thing, I'm sure it's great! I'm just not interested enough in this show that way hehe)

Favourite moment: T'Pol's speech standing up for the crew to the Vulcan High Command stands out in my memory... I'd probably have to rewatch to answer this question properly tbh

Rating out of 10: gonna be generous and overlook the nightmare of its place in history and all the ensuing xenophobia baked into its very premise and give it a solid 6/10. These characters deserved to come into their own, and the show is often good fun!

#ask game #sorry for the super late answer! I was sickies #thank you for the ask <3

6 notes · View notes

chasmbreach · 1 year

Text

i wrote this in a frenzy at 3am. i love undertale so much you don't understand

2:55: i hate it when my brain starts thinking too much in the fucking late ass hours of 2:45 am anyway, i got recommended fallen down piano with reverb on yt again and yknow, obviously i gotta listen to the hella peaceful ass helllll music because it just do be really beautiful yknow? but then i thought about how when monsters fall down, they're considered fallen monsters? i'm forgetting my exact undertale lore, but wasn't it about how the monster was dying of old age, or just having a weak SOUL in general? which was why alphys did her experiments and the whole point of the DT experiments to prevent them from dying. and i know your best friend is the first song you listen to when you begin Frisk's journey through the underground, but i'm just thinking about how he's probably not done that to all of the other children that have fallen before Frisk, considering that Toriel is always there to help the children and care for them. So, tying back to Fallen Down..., all of the kids that fell into the Underground had "fallen" in the sense of if they were a monster, they would've been dying. all of the children who fell into the underground had a sense of not wanting to continue their lives with the other humans, which is why they decided to fall into the hole in hopes of finding release from their lives. they've been emotionally dead for a long time. that's where they start, and that's their emotional state when they decided to fall. they're children who don't have the will to keep going, but then toriel comes in and takes care of them, they want to feel loved, to be a child, to be a human where they can just be. it's why each and every one of them make the decision to go through the ruins door, to experience living

2:56: anyway this is bullshit analysis it's nearly 3am i don't think i made sense

2:56: me getting emotional over fallen down for the 27345394 time

2:58: gods i love undertale characters i fucking love toriel and her flaws, because it's what makes her seem like well rounded person who has motivations and grief, and that grief is what makes her so, so unique in how she presents herself

3:00: i fucking love papyrus because he is so skroigly but also because he believes in you. even in the no mercy run, he isn't naive. he isn't, good god. yes he sees the best of people, but it does get more than that. he loves. he loves so much. and isn't that just difficult in this society sometimes yknow?

3:02: i fucking love undyne, because despite her slightly misguided anger towards humans, she is, after all, representing of justice. she wants the bring the best out of everyone. she's critical, but she can identify when she's wrong. she just exudes so much confidence and is such a big motivator, it makes it so hard to dislike her.

3:04: i fucking love alphys, and isn't she such a complex character when at first glance. she really isn't that complicated in terms of how much analysis of her personality really needs. she wants to help, but she afraid to do it wrong. she wants to be the best, but she never feels her best. if she hides her mistakes, then nobody needs to know that she was a "bad person," when she was just trying to do what she thought was right.

3:05: i fucking love metatton, and after reading ALIVE AU it made me love him even more. yes, he's selfish, but he still wants the best for alphys. he's the type of monster who doesn't outwardly show he cares, but he will absolutely be there when you need it most, to bring you back and to make sure you're ok. 3:06: he also has some regrets and grievances, don't get me wrong, this is probably the most unknown character for me haha, but he makes me think about how, in reality, there really is just one life, and that one life you should make the most of it.

3:08: i fucking love asgore. a sad old pitiful shell of himself, but filled with so much pain and regret for all the things he's done. he wants to mend his wounds, but he cannot bring himself to. he feels as if his decisions were his to bare, and he must deal with his own consequences. he needs a hug, but he'd never accept one. he doesn't think he deserves forgiveness, but he does. he really does.

3:11: and of course, sans. well, i know he is famous because of megalovania, but in the end, he really makes me sad, maybe pity. depression is a bitch. the amount of hope he exudes when he sees the sunrise during the pacifist makes me cry. he never thought he'd get here. he never thought he'd be okay enough to be there for papyrus. because isn't everything for him? even when you kill papyrus, he doesn't do anything except call you a dirty brother killer. he's so, so tired. really, he's just putting up a mask every day. and he is literally the exact opposite of papyrus yeah?

3:12: anyway. i didn't think i'd type so much haha 3:12: love letter to the game that made me feel

3:15: i think, because the story really makes you think about decisions, that your decision to reset, will affect everyone? makes this world really real for me. don't get me wrong, i love omori. the story is really good and i love it to bits. sunny has an incredibly complex history with his emotions but... the story will always just feel like just that. a video game character on a screen.

3:23: hmmm. i'm thinking again. i think what really did it in for me is this old comic i saw even before i got into undertale and saw a playthrough of it. it was simply drawn, but basically someone wanted to replay undertale after the true pacifist route, and flowey comes on screen right? but then the comic artist wrote about how they couldn't do it. they couldn't reset, because it had been probably a few months or like a year since they've played, and Frisk had probably done so much in that timeframe, it would be incredibly cruel to take it all away because "you were curious" to play the game all again and it also ended with someone else commenting "undertale: the game you never play again" or something like that

#deepest dark #undertale #*guruuruuggles*#it's 4am now babyyyy #i just remember oh hey i can post whatever i want on tumblr #so i'm posting my love letter to undertale #this letter is so fucking bad but oh my god #oh my god i fucking love undertale #like yes as much as i love utmv you gotta just. appreciate the origin #and goddAMN DO I FUCKING LOVE UNDERTALE #also i didn't write about chara because bruh i am a chara apologist???? i have so many words to say about them??? oh my fucking gods?????#i fucking love chara oh my god you don't even KNOW. i will defend them for the rest of my fucking life.#even though they don't need defending in the first place because a child is still a child and NOT!!! the reason why genocide happened.#you the PLAYER decided to do a genocide run. not Chara. simply put.. YOU gave chara the idea that killing was for power #CHARA did nothing wrong.#oh damn i guess i did write about chara ANYWAY

1 note · View note

bookalooza · 2 months

Text

Crafting Genius Characters That Captivate

Let's Craft Characters They'll Never Forget

Characters, They're the heart of every story, the folks we laugh with, cry for, and root like crazy for (or against!). But how do you take a name on a page and turn them into someone readers can't put down? That's where the magic of character creation comes in. Buckle up, because we're about to dive deep and craft some truly unforgettable characters!

Knowing Your Characters Inside Out

Before you even start typing, you gotta get to know your characters on a personal level. Think of them as new friends – what makes them tick?

What's Their Why? Every character needs a driving force. What's their ultimate goal? Maybe it's saving the world, finding love, or just getting through the day. This "why" gives them purpose and makes their actions believable.

What Do They Crave? Deep down, what does your character truly desire? Is it something they can hold, or is it a feeling like security or acceptance? These desires can create yummy tension in your story.

What Scares Them Silly? What keeps your character up at night? The fear of losing someone they love, failing a dream, or spiders (we all have our things!) Fears can be a powerful motivator and make your character relatable.

The Past Makes Us Who We Are: What experiences have shaped your character? A tough childhood, a lost love, a winning lottery ticket – their history matters. It influences how they see the world, interact with others, and make choices.

Adding Layers and Spice

The best characters aren't one-size-fits-all. They're complex individuals with a whole spectrum of emotions, flaws (because nobody's perfect!), and even contradictions.

Flawed But Fabulous: Let's face it, we all have our quirks. Don't be afraid to give your characters some flaws – it makes them way more interesting and real. Plus, flaws create opportunities for growth, which is awesome.

Walking Contradictions: Humans are full of them! We can be both brave and scaredy-cats, kind and a little grumpy sometimes. Embrace the contradictions in your characters, it makes them feel real.

Feeling the Feels: Let your characters experience all the emotions! Joy, sadness, anger, fear, love, hate – the whole buffet. Emotions forge a connection with readers, so don't hold back.

Making Your Characters Shine

In a world overflowing with stories, your characters need to stand out from the crowd. What makes them one-of-a-kind?

Their Own Voice: Give each character a unique way of speaking. How do they express themselves? Do they pepper their speech with slang or fancy words?

Mannerisms Matter: What are your characters' little habits? Do they tap their foot when they're nervous? Always twirl a strand of hair?

Quirks Make Us Quirk: What makes your characters truly special? Do they collect bottle caps or have a pet rock named Steve? Embrace the quirks!

Transformation: The Ultimate Payoff

The most captivating characters are the ones who evolve throughout the story. They face challenges that force them to confront their flaws and make tough decisions.

Inner Battles: Give your characters internal conflicts to wrestle with. Maybe it's a head-versus-heart situation, or a clash between what they want and what they know is right.

External Obstacles: Life's not easy, so don't make it easy for your characters either. Throw challenges, roadblocks, and setbacks their way. These will push them to grow.

A Changed Person: By the end, your characters should be different from where they started. They should have learned something valuable about themselves and the world around them.

Bringing Them to Life: It's Showtime!

Now that your characters are fleshed out, it's time to unleash them on the page! Here are some tips:

Show, Don't Tell: Instead of saying a character is brave, show them facing their fears head-on.

Dialogue that Pops: Make your characters' conversations sound natural and reveal their personalities.

Action Speaks Louder: Use your characters' actions to show what they're thinking and feeling.

Remember, delve deep, add layers, and let them transform.

So there you have it! With these tips and a sprinkle of creativity, you'll be crafting unforgettable characters in no time. Remember, delve deep, add layers, and let them transform. Now go forth and write characters that steal hearts (or maybe strike fear, if that's your thing)!

Uncover hidden gems in our other blogs – each one a unique exploration of ideas, stories, and expertise.

0 notes

ink-stained-words · 1 year

Text

everything is very compartmentalized at the moment

there are the things I refuse to touch (most everything)

and a couple of safe things to think about

it's a barbed wire minefield. I can only step specific places

it feels okay right now

but distant. held at an arm's length

why do our brains like running over all the ways we failed, over & over & over, hating ourselves for fucking up

how do I convince you that there's no amount of shit I wouldn't go through beside you, as long as I knew it would get us both out the other end of it

how do I convince myself the same might go for me

that trip was never supposed to be Relaxing & Fun. I was there for damage control. minimize the shittiness. make sure someone was there to listen to you play guitar & fucking gender you correctly & watch shows you like

it was still fun. and quite relaxing

I liked it. it wasn't all good, but I liked it

I like having a routine with you in it. making the bed & waking up around the same time every morning. brushing our teeth & setting up my laptop for otgw & complaining slightly bc that's the only way my brain can process that you want to fall asleep on my chest bc it makes you feel peaceful & content

I know it was shitty & awful. some parts felt shitty & awful

but you didn't fail anyone. especially not me. not even the host people, no matter what anyone says

you needed to survive it

Christmas was shitty & you were doing your absolute fucking best to stay sane, & sometimes that means dragging your strange best friend from Idaho along with you & hiding in the office with her all day, playing guitar & watching shows

sometimes that means deciding fuck it, this is the only thing that'll keep me from losing it, so. ain't that just the way

they don't get it, bc they're not walking a tightrope, knowing that slipping will cause multiple things to break & there's so much fucking weight all the time

they're adding to the weight, fucking hell. actively worsening it

how do we decide that nothing our parents think matters

how do we get far enough away that it'll stop hurting so much when we're not enough for people, when we can't give them what they want

we keep going, & hope it'll mean anything in the long run

it will. we have another trip in April. I'm going to Florida in May, then your house for graduation, then you're going to Europe

you'll probably go to LA sometime in between all of that. maybe see a concert, maybe just sit with someone who understands in a place that isn't suffocating

we'll keep going, & it'll mean something

all of it is at an arm's length at the moment. what the house smelled like, sounded like, how any of it felt

I keep imagining what it'll be like to have you here again, for more than just a night

we're not healthy people. we're a bit broken. cracked in places, can't take weight & pressure the way people generally can

and just, in general, Not Typical Generic Human Beings

but we're doing our fucking best & even if things get bad, what else is new. we'll do what we'll always do. wait it out

I'll make you drink water. probably take more responsibility for your well-being than I strictly should, all things considered

gotta love that self-sacrificial complex rooted in all those years I spent as a kid taking care of my siblings & parents

I don't feel like I'm doing any of this correctly

but overall

considering the bigger picture

my parents don't hate me. neither do my siblings

you like me? enough to want me at Thanksgiving & Nye

I'm your best friend still. neither of us have fucked that up. I'm starting to believe it would take Strong & Deliberate Effort to fuck it up

you're doing alright in school. you're almost done with all the volunteering hours, you're almost done

you have your DND group & friends. your parents & sibling don't hate you

you have Ronan & Em & the server people & you have me

I don't think either of us are breaking anything by coping & existing & trying our best, even when sometimes that means saying fuck it to family commitments & hiding in a room

it's self care

not the pretty kind. not the kind anyone wants to deal with

but it's self care

it's good

I'm proud of you

#writing #thoughts #uhh #words?#a lot of those #I'm processing #the nye trip #and just life in general #could be worse #could be better #we're coping #I'm sorry it often just feels like failing #failing other people & failing yourself #you're not #I promise you're not #neither of us are

0 notes

west-tokyo-incidents · 2 years

Text

Too many thoughts too little time.

I'm just gonna vomit dump all my ideas up in one spot maybe it'll help me focus.

If there's a ship you don't like you can just skip over that part.

Mizho/Fussa

The band gets together and Fussa backs off Mizho pretty much entirely, considering she was originally only doing so for The Money(tm) and that's changed. Mizho's grateful for it... at first. Mizho's pretty openly a lesbian and now 20, Rage and Paresse have been together for a while now, and Fussa, with three supportive queer bandmates around her, finally comes out as trans. It takes Mizho quite a bit to wrap her head around it.

Fussa decides to dress up just a bit more fem one day and asks for Mizho's help. Fussa has her hair down, just a casual blouse and jeans... and Mizho offers to do her makeup and suddenly they're very close and Mizho's heart is in her fucking throat as her brain finally gets with the program and registers Fussa as a woman and suddenly she realizes she has a thing for older women.

Insert soft bumbling mumbles about how Fussa should dress up more often and excusing herself when they're done... proceeding to go have gay panic 2.0 while frantically texting the boys; [WHAT DO??? PRETTY LADY???? IM FUCKING??? LESBIANS???]

Paresse/Rage

Rage's first break down since becoming human. He's a fucking mess and yelling at Paresse, even as he's being held and ugly crying. Mizho and Fussa not quite sure what to do, but Paresse just... instinctively trying everything he knows to calm him down. And both of them slowly realizing how much they care about the other.

They settle on best friends for a while.

Paresse does his best to be 'okay'. He has more energy and over exerts himself for the other three as if he has to make up for what he couldn't do as a robot. Paresse with a caretaker complex, even if he's arguably one of the most traumatized of the band. Eventually, it does break him down, too, but it's more quiet and Rage ends up repeating a few of the phrases Paresse has said to him countless times... and they realize what they have isn't a friendship, it's something much different.

Fussa/Paresse

Vice dies, early on. Paresse steps up suddenly as the ultimate evil. No one believes it when he is the one calling for a meeting. Only Jealousy shows up and Paresse goes to yank every last one of his other new subordinates out of their homes to drag them to the meeting.

Fussa finds this particularly terrifying and cannot explain why it makes her FUCKING hard. Paresse, having copied Jealousy's heart reading, picks up on it immediately and uses it to his advantage. Fussa is very blatantly against following Vice, but Vice is gone. And Paresse would very much like to have her loyalty. And so manipulates her based on her fear and arousal and turns her and Rage into his personal playthings.

Vice/Rage

Rage fawning after Vice as douji in the way an obsessed henchman in a video game fawns over their supervillain master... except Rage has money and loves to occasionally buy shit for Vice. He doesn't say anything more other than some shit like, 'got it on a whim' or 'forgot I already had one you can have this one'.

Vice knows exactly who the gifts come from, but cannot fucking fathom why other than maybe Rage is trying to buy his favor so Vice won't kill him? That's gotta be it, right?

Except the gifts don't stop when they become human. He offers Vice the body guard job... and suddenly Vice is the henchman, in a way. The band gets drunk, celebrating a milestone, Vice is on duty.

Suddenly Mizho whispers something to Rage and the next thing Vice knows is an alcohol-wet pair of lips on his.

Mizho/Rage

Two curious teenagers who grow into a fucking power couple like the world has never seen before. May or may not kill people behind the scenes for a while after the douji become human to satiate their own bloodlust. They're an open relationship but god help the person who tries to get between them. Just general metal goth couple GOALS.

Mizho/Paresse

Generally angsty shit. Both chasing after Michel in their own ways. All around unhealthy. Also an excuse to write v on v sex. Could become healthy if they talk any of their shit out but... they're sloth. Good luck with that. Mostly I wanna write cooch grinding.

#ress talks #thirst post #mizho/fussa #paresse/rage #fussa/paresse #vice/rage #mizho/paresse

1 note · View note

writing-prompt-s · 3 years

Note

Hey there! First time anon asker, long time follower. I appreciate all the work you do for this blog. Just want to keep the conversation going about the Edison quote you retweeted, on "giving up" versus "knowing when to stop." Though Edison sucks as some comments pointed out, I happen to agree with the quote to an extent. I'm curious to know more about your experience. First, some background for my opinion: I work as a student tutor for fellow college students. One of the biggest things we learn as tutors is how to encourage students NOT to give up when they face a challenge. Lots of people, especially first-gen college students, give up when they're struggling in class because they assume they're "not smart enough" or something along those lines, when research and my personal experience show that that's not true. They are able to change their school habits and seek out help, but only if they already have a mindset where they believe they can do it. Those who don't believe in themselves are less likely to seek help and thus, more likely to fail. Students might also drop out of college or get bad grades because of things outside of their control, like losing their job or other difficulties that make it hard for them to continue at college. This is also an issue because some (not all) colleges have programs to help students during difficult times, but many students don't even try, they just drop out. I have benefitted from some of these programs personally, so even though they can't cure everything, these programs should be considered when a student is struggling. And sometimes, dropping out of college IS the best decision for a person, whether they intend to return later or go a different path. It's just that for many students, they don't have to give up on their education/career goals because of the hardships they're currently trying to work through, but they believe that there's nothing else they can do. The solution may be out there, but they "give up" because they didn't look for it. As a tutor, that's why phrases like "don't give up!" are so important for the people I work with. Not because college is for everyone or that people should sacrifice their well-being for a degree, but because students (again especially first generation college students, students of color, and low income students) have such low confidence in themselves and their ability to learn and grow through obstacles. The Edison quote wasn't about college, but I'm using my experience as a college student and tutor as a more concrete example of why the Edison quote could be useful. College student or not, I think having a "don't give up" attitude can get you through some hard times. So all of this is to preface my question: in your opinion, how can we know the difference between a healthy, "I will do everything I can to meet my goals" situation and an unhealthy, "I will sacrifice everything" situation? Sorry for this lengthy ask btw, if you don't want to respond I completely understand. Just hoping to hear your insight to the topic more. Thanks for this blog and for sharing your thoughts! -S

Hey S!

Read “The Dip” by Seth Godin. It counts about 80 pages but reads like 30. I highly recommend reading it and using the ideas in guiding your students. When you read it, it’s mostly common sense with a bit of oh damn, nice! But sometimes common sense needs to be conceptualized, made concrete, or put into context, and this little book does just that.

The main idea is to know if you should quit or persevere during ‘a dip’ by forecasting the probability of success and take costs/rewards into account.

However, this might not be everyone’s best skill, so some people might need practice or guidance. As Ray Dalio points out in his book ‘Principles’, everyone is wired differently. Just as our bodies come in different shapes and sizes, so do the compositions of our brains. Some people might have weak bones or naturally have lots of muscle mass. Others might regulate emotions well, or are weak at visualizing the future. (By the way, neuroscience tells us we can shape and improve our brains!)

The different compositions of our brains also affects communication between people. Everyone encodes and decodes information differently, and then also gets filtered through one’s own life experiences. So advice such as ‘first seek to understand, then to be understood’ is paramount before encouraging people to ‘not give up.’ If the other person doesn’t feel that you completely understand their situation, saying that actually might work counter-productive!

In my opinion, in most cases 'don’t give up!’ is a good motto for college students. You know what to expect from college. If you do x you will get x. If you stick through the dip (time spend getting good grades), you will get the reward (degree). However, as you point out, some students might face additional stress outside of college, or society might already have put them at a disadvantage. It might just become too much. You helping and encouraging students who are at a disadvantage is incredibly helpful. As humans, we are naturally wired to be interdependent. We cannot do everything by ourselves, nor should we want to. We thrive on meaningful relationships and social connections.

So where is the line between healthy and unhealthy? That’s actually a very tough question. Most people tend to think of life as a journey, always trying to get somewhere, trying to achieve something. It would mean telling people how to live their life and I have no clue. Of course, if in trying to get to your goal your body shows signs of it being unhealthy, stop or take a break. Stress is good, but not to the point where you break down. Self-management is key. Overall I would say it’s healthy if your values align with the process to achieve the goal, the goal, and the consequences of achieving it. But then again, always be realistic. Quitting frees up time, energy and other resources that can be spend on achieving a different, perhaps more rewarding/meaningful/attainable goal.

An attempt at a more concrete answer would be:

It’s impossible to generalize what is healthy and what is unhealthy as everyone has a different idea of what that is and is living their own complex life. Therefore, on a case-by-case basis, people should be taught to take a step back sometimes, contemplate what they are doing, analyse it, be open-minded, seek help from (qualified) people and ask for feedback and advice, and then make up their minds themselves whether what they are doing is healthy or not.

As @zeadtalost said in the comments: “Man’s gotta know his limitations”. But then I would like to add to it that ‘man’ should not be fool enough never to test what they believe to be their limitations. Because what you say is true. Often limitations are in the mind, and overcoming them is what will make people more confident and capable! So please keep doing what you are doing. I doubt you find this a concrete answer, but I am pretty sure the book by Seth Godin will help you lots! Also, by the length of your ask I can tell you are very dedicated and a compassionate tutor, and it’s your caring attitude that will give your students the best chance of succeeding!

855 notes · View notes

lov3nerdstuff · 3 years

Note

Hi Kay!

I just wanted to take a moment and say how deeply moving (and overall comforting) I find your writing to be! I've gone through almost the entirety of your masterlist twice in the past month alone and have found myself returning more often to the pieces of literature/poems your reference sometimes. (Especially that one poem by Benedict Smith! I've read a few more by him because of you and they're just wonderfully lovely 💛 so I'm eternally thankful to you for including it.)

I may be wrong in assuming, but I believe you may have studied/are currently studying a degree involving literature. I hope this isn't too foreward of me but I was wandering if you have any other works of literature that you'd recommend? (I'd love to read anything you recommend from poems to plays 💛) I'm slightly embaressed to say but the works I've read are quite limited to a highschool level and since I'm currently studying Pharmacy, there are very few people who can recommend me such moving works. :)

I also feel like I should apologise for writing such a large ask, so please accept this apology as well hehe 💕🥺

Sincerely,

Bek 🌻

Hey there Bek 💚💕✨

First of all... I'm incredibly sorry for how long it took me to reply to this ask, I know you sent it weeks ago and I'm honestly just ashamed of myself for only replying now! I've been taking a bit of a Tumblr break again, or rather a break from literally everything, and I guess not having written anything in a while made me feel guilty whenever I opened Tumblr, so... All I can say for myself really is that I'm sorry you had to wait so long! Again, I never ever ignore anyone, I promise! It just sometimes takes a while for me to reply 😅🙈

Now, I'm so happy to hear that you've been enjoying my writing! 🥺🥰 Hearing that it's comforting and inspiring to you is honestly such a relief and indeed does make me happy more than I can say 💚 It's so cool that you're checking up on all the references I make aaahhh 🥺🥺🥺 I love it 😁 You're always more than welcome, love! I don't think I could stop including references to literature, culture, history and the science around it even if I tried 😅☺️

And yeah, I did study classics and newer literature as a minor for my undergrad degree 😄 But tbh I still work with literally a lot even now (I'm in grad school for media and cultural studies) even though it's technically not something I've been properly taught ☺️ I'm just a nerd who likes to learn on her own, and with media and culture you can pretty much delve into almost anything you want 😂😅🤷🏻‍♀️

Now, it's not forward at all to ask me for literature recommendations! 😁😃 I truly love recommending stuff!!! I have a few up my sleeve, even though you've probably heard of a few already, for obvious reasons: A lot of what I truly enjoyed reading was something Tom Hiddleston has worked on in one way or another! It's truly a magnificent guideline for picking new literature... Just look up the literary origins of his films/shows/plays and you will be in for quality literature most of the time! I don't think I've ever mentioned it on here, but me reading High-Rise (JG Ballard) because I heard Tom would be partaking in the film adaptation was actually what sparked my love and passion for literature!!! Yep, it's that good. Now on to the recommendations though 😁(This... got rather long):

Plays

Anything by Harold Pinter really, but for obvious reasons you'll find a lot of additionally fun stuff for Betrayal, which is lovely and truly funny if you're in on the kind of humour btw

Medea by Euripides (a classic, but I love it nonetheless... You can find translations in almost every language) ((and pls stay away from Seneca's Medea, because ugh... Euripides is far better AND the og story, as much as anyone can say that for Greek mythology)

La Bohème by Puccini (I know, this is technically an opera, but if you read the libretto it's honestly just like a play... And if you're up for it, the og story is in prose and written by Henri Murger... It's better than the opera, but oftentimes more difficult to find) ((this one is hilarious and basically explains an entire cultural subgroup in the 19th century)

Faust by Goethe (many people hate it, but I LOVE this one!!! It's also been translated into any and every language, and it's so interesting philosophically!!! It's also referenced SO freaking often literally everywhere, and the operas and ballets based on it are always my fave) ((there's technically Faust I and Faust II, but you're good to go just reading the first one)

Anything by Shakespeare, obviously... Though I do love me my Hamlet like every other literature enthusiast (Yes, I can do that one famous soliloquy in act 3 scene 1 by heart as well...)

Poetry

Again, anything Shakespeare for the win, but I LOVE the sonnets and keep a copy of them with me most of the time (Yes, I own multiple copies of the sonnets...) ((My faves are 116 and 91, but there's always so much truth to be found in there!!!))

A lot of the stuff William Blake wrote is amazing, though you have to pick carefully with him if certain religious motives aren't your thing... I love The Tyger, which is an individual poem, and the collection of works called Tyger, Tyger which does have many good ones and a few ones that are a little more on the mediocre side

Do not go gentle into that good night by Dylan Thomas (I know this one by heart as well... It's beautiful, and there's a version of Hiddleston reading it on YouTube, which gives you even more goosebumps than the poem does anyway)

Invictus by William Ernest Henley (same for this one, also read by the one and only) ((I love to read this when I'm feeling down or powerless))

The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock by T. S. Eliot (This is another wow piece with many quotable lines and truths... I love it a lot and keep coming back to it! It's also a great example of how literary modernism tried to condense the complexity and passing of time and history into a single frame that had to be intrinsically poetical in nature... As in, this poem could've been a short story in any other period, but modernists loved to make everything a poem so here you go)

Der Zauberlehrling by Goethe (This one sucks in all English translations I’ve found, poetically speaking, but in German it’s such a fun piece! If you’ve ever seen the Disney ‘The Sorcerer’s Apprentice’ with Mickey Mouse or listened to the orchestral piece by Paul Dukas, then this poem proves very useful in truly understanding either! But again, the English translation should only be taken for informational value... The German one is also worded hilariously)

Prose

Short edited by Alan Ziegler (This is a collection of short prose forms that honestly is a must for me... I love this book to pieces and have had it for years now! It’s an international anthology, so you’ll find more and less famous authors from all around the world represented with short stories, prose poems, short essays and just curious and interesting snippets of writing! I draw a lot of inspiration from this book)

High-Rise by JG Ballard (As mentioned above, I owe this book part of my personality... I don’t think I would be the same person without having read it. It’s not necessarily full of wisdom, but if you’re interested in a different kind of portrayal of the human condition, then this is the read you need to take a look at)

The City of Dreaming Books by Walter Moers (This is another piece that changed my perception of literature, even though this is a more ordinary and ‘fun’-value read... It’s one of my favourite books and it’s endlessly entertaining! So if the classics are a bit heavy for you, this one is perfect for casual readers as well! Its value really does lie more in the realisation of how fun literature can be, and the freedom you have as an author... So really, I could recommend everything by Moers, his style is amazing both in the German original and in the English translation. Yes, I’ve read both.)

Good Omens by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett (This is comedic gold, stylistic gold and generally a bloody perfect book. Also a ‘fun’-value read, but it also does a magnificent job at showing you what you can do with literature, and how well-developed characters are supposed to be written)

The Penguin Book of the Undead (Penguin Classics) edited by Scott G. Bruce (This book is basically an education on fifteen hundred years of supernatural encounters and how culture wrote, used and perceived them. You get introductory texts for different periods and social groups, explaining how and why ghost stories were written and used, followed by passages of the prime source texts (eg. ancient necromancy shown on The Odyssey). Really, this book is just for cultural history nerds)

The Earthquake in Chile by Kleist (This isn’t necessarily one of my faves, but it has helped me understand what studying literature and culture can do for you. In case anyone remembers my insistence in Wicked Game that you gotta know what a pomegranate symbolises... this novella is such an instance where this knowledge would prove useful. Generally, it gives many opportunities to think about privilege and circumstance)

The Symposium by Plato (You’ll probably not want to read the entire collection of speeches tbh... But the concepts introduced mainly here and in some of Plato’s other work are well worth looking into! For example, the ‘double being’ introduces a concept that in modern fiction is called soulmates... Just sayin’)

#literature #lit rec #recommendation #literature recommendation

31 notes · View notes

whatifyoulivelikethat · 3 years

Text

about parents

i find it weird parents feel OK neglecting their kids, or atleast not SHOW any signs of regret. kinda off putting for a kid who doesnt have much understanding of complex emotions. my father had ever been part of my life, living in the same house. i used to be super into football, not to brag but i was the only girl in the boys team, but he never fulfilled any of his responsibilities; everything i asked for had to come for a price, i had to do him something, if i wanted something in return.

except for the school fee part and paying for the household, he emotionally removed himself from my life. and then went on to physically remove himself to, by shifting to another state.

im not saying parents dont have their own reasons, but fuck, hes so fucking cold i cant bear talking to him for more than a minute on the phone. like why the fuck do you even have kids if u cant fucking handle the responsibility of a human who literally fucking depends on you who does that why would u torture a child like that?

like i sometimes think maybe if things were a little different, maybe if this had changed, maybe if that had changed. but no, no it wont. i just dont get why u cant think it out, its such a major decision to have a child.

do you think you'd want to change anything about your childhood?

I don't think about things I can't change. It's already happened. I wouldn't be who I am today if it wasn't for my childhood.

The things I've shared on here, either in replies or veiled in my stories, are the tame things. I probably can't even remember all the things that have happened to me because pretending it didn't happen was the only thing I could do to even make it here today to type these words to you. And, unfortunately, I still remember too much.

People are what they are. They do what they're going to do. I don't think anyone has perfect parents. Everyone gets by in different ways. I don't talk to my parents anymore. I moved far away from them. I'm not hateful, angry, or disappointed in them either.

My dad is very distant despite physically being there. I wouldn't say my dad is cold. Actually, not sure if he feels much, if anything. He is my mom's husband. I don't think he's ever spoken to me on the phone. We barely had conversations in person. Think he physically defended me once against my mom when I was very young. I don't remember what she did to me. I only remember that it was worse than what she was originally going to do because my dad tried to protect me. After that, he didn't bother anymore. He just removed himself so he doesn't have to watch.

Do you think they should have thought? Do you think they shouldn't have had me? I could think about this all day and it's not going to get me anywhere. I went through the actual events, dragged myself through the thorns of the dark place, and now I put my energy into the things I want to.

I gotta say, I would rather think about how adorable Min Yoongi was at SOWOOZOO than my parents.

8 notes · View notes

omegangrins · 4 years

Text

A Treatise On the Doctor

I don't know how to start this. Because I think of Peter Capaldi's words when he said that the only thing required to be a Doctor Who fan, is kindness.

I like 13 and think Chibnall is doing his best job writing the show.

So I struggle to write this because I am engaging against that very unkindness in the Doctor Who fandom, and trying very hard not to be angry back. "Allways try to be nice but never fail to be kind." But I've begun to wonder more and more if those who speak so loudly against the show really know what the show itself is about.

Enough of talking about other people though, cause frankly they're only important as set-up for this conversation. And again, I'm working kind.

So here's what you're gonna learn from this lifelong fan (and the best Tl;dr you're gonna get):

1. The Doctor sucks. From the very beginning. People complain about character traits now that have been around as long as the show.

2. Due to the Doctor's suckage, they tend to do more harm than good. (And because of this, most of the Doctor's "friends" along the way have been, well, let's leave it at the air quotes for now cause it's a damn big list of "BOOOO!!!".)

3. All of the showrunners and writers and actors and editors and everyone else has allways knows this and has played it this way.

4. And last but not least, since this is a time travel show. If you wanna know what and why stuff is happening now, look it up. Everything that happened before is allways in play.

5. None of this is bad, and in fact, it makes the show morally grayer. It's about kindness at all costs. Even your own.

A. First things first, the hard thing. The Doctor is not grrrreat. I mean, sure they try, but they fail a lot more often. In Extremis, a majority of those fatality index counts come from people the Doctor failed to save. That's why it's worded so specifically as "cause of death". All the death's caused by the Doctor's very interaction with time and lack of saving those around them. And part of it's not their fault, but more often than not, the Doctor says I can save you, and can't, won't, or chooses not to.

And that would be alright, but it took them over 1000 years to realize they should start letting their companions lead lives outside of theirs so THEY DON'T DIE. A bit too long as someone who claims to be better.

Not to mention how many times the Doctor is dismissive of their companions and the people around them only to use them for their help and just bug off again. If they truly cared and wanted to help, they would stay and listen in between adventures. Their lifespan is near infinite anyway. What's a few extra Earth hours with some friends you made along the way. You know, maybe fix some of the psychological and emotional damage created by encountering things behind a human's original scope of reasoning. But nope, we gotta go adventure more, byyyyeee!!

So when people talk about these qualities in 13 in a negative aspect I have to laugh because I'm not sure if they understand the joke. Cause we're talking about an alien that grew up around a species calling themselves Time Lords. I try not to blame them too much for it. 1 had to learn how to be hospitable to humans and it's been a bit of a slow learning curve ever since.

B. After the Doctor survived the horrors of the Time War and happened upon a human companion they felt worth connecting to, what did they do? They took Rose to watch her planet burn in front of her eyes. Great, first date, amirite?

And that's a little bit of companion damage. Do you know that the Doctor is responsible for the almost complete genocide of the Silurian race across multiple occasions. I am legitimately surprised there are any left after all of the ones the Doctor has killed. Like before, they cause destruction either purposefully or accidentally or simply by force of being there.

Remember before how I said that the Doctor just flies away. Yeah, they leave a lot of problems behind when they do (something that I can see Chibnall is planting the seeds of). If you had a time and space machine and practically unlimited capabilities and you choose to just leave after a situation and not check up on them from time to or see if there are any other underlying crises to be solved. But oh no, "gotta follow that rule of time and keep going even though I stopped in the first place because of how interested I was.". This is why 9 has a great arc about this. He thought he killed all the Daleks. They came back. He thought he'd gotten rid of the Slitheen. They came back. He thought he saved Satellite 5 from aliens. But opsies, they came back. And look! They're Daleks. Which he "finally" got rid of.

The Doctor just bounces around all carefree and without an ounce of care for themselves, their companions or consequences unless there's consequences for themselves or their companions. Then they get indignant.

Is that really kind of the person you want flying around fixing things in time and space? Who knows. But at least they are trying. Most of the time the T.A.R.D.I.S. lands somewhere and the authority figures are the most pretentious bull-headed pigs you can find. To me, I laugh cause it seems like both sides end up getting a taste of their own medicine. Usually with the bull charging to death in a sad glory while the Doctor wiles on metaphorically about not being as good as them.

But again, as a "superior" alien with "advanced" technology and "culture" you'd think they'd just know better already. But that's all part of the character. The Doctor may be in flux, but true change is difficult. The real hero of every story is the other people BESIDES the Doctor.

Cause the title is Doctor *Who* . The Who being half of the title, despite having less letters. It's the constant question of "What and why and who is that crazy person that's trying to help?" Why do you think they keep flying back to Earth? (Besides set construction reasons.) They've grown as attached to us as we have to them. And at this point, a lot of their saving us is guilt and embarrassment at having a hand in our timeline.

This is also the same reason the Doctor dumps companions in a fluff. Baggage. Every time a companion gets too heavy to carry the memories of... off they fly.

Except for 13. She's stayed. To this end, we can see how the Doctor changes. Not on our smaller, human timelines, but on the timeline of a god with way too much power.

D. With that in mind, we go Classic. It's the Who you need to consult if you wish to make any critique on what's happening now. Because how can you know how a part operates inside of a whole without seeing the whole part?

Cause I don't know if you've watched it but it can be rough, and I don't mean in the sense of production value (which admittedly they do a fairly decent job of using what money they had. A problem the BBC plagues to Doctor Who to this day.). The 3rd Doctor shits on every one they call friends constantly and then turns around expecting help. 4 did the same. Then 5 masked that contempt with a plucky face and a cheeky word. But it was still there, bubbling out of 6 and 7 as the inability to suffer fools gladly and using their own righteousness to enact change in their companions. A trait that kept going til an entire war and regeneration was used solving the question of "Doctor Who?" Only for them to try and forget twice more by putting on their pretty grinning faces and running away from it.

And I'm only talking from a companion perspective. Each of the Doctors has enacted their own form of genocide on countless species. Sure, it's to "save humans" but at the end of the day you'd have to ask yourself if we're really worth that blood. And this is all in the Doctor's history. As much as they claim better, they're hands are still gushing red.

The Doctor left Jo because she fell in love. They drove Adric to put their life on the line in order to feel adequate. The entirety of the Silurian race has been wiped out fivefold under their watch, with one time by their hand itself. Same for several other singular and unique species you won't be able to find elsewhere in the universe. 7 used time travel to enact a personality change in Ace while simultaneously using her as a pawn in an interdimensional war. The Time War itself. Sure it got erased but the Doctor still did those things ("War" Doctor or whatever nonsense titles they feel necessary to delude themselves). The entirety of Amy's childhood was destroyed by their presence, and Rory got erased. Twice! Sarah Kingdom. We know the list. Hell, the Doctor whisked Barbara and Ian away because they wanted to teach the snobby humans some lessons.

They may have a time machine, but we have the bill of their actions. This is where 13 excels. Because they're trying to be better than themselves. They've learnt the lessons of all those years traveling and the failures they wish they could reverse but don't as a way of keeping a scoreboard of pain. It's not perfect by any means, but look at 12 needing cue cards to understand and react to human grief under duress. They've come a helluva long way. After 50 years, I'm inclined to believe better. After all, it's what the Doctor would want.

E. You know how people like the ASOIAF series because it offers up morally complex characters existing in a morally complex world where black and white are harder to define than grey? Have you ever thought of Doctor Who as the same? Strip past the fairytale and adventure and "wibbly wobbly timey wimeyness and it's just people reacting to situations. We're just harder on the Doctor because they're hard on us. You could go round and round on who's the bigger killer, but at the end of the day Time Lords and humans fight and feel about the same things. It's allways been a joke to pretend otherwise.

That's why I love the Timeless Child. Not for making the Doctor anymore special but for saying that even despite having all of their specialness ripped away and repurposed to create a lie of a society then having the memory wiped of said event, the Doctor broke out of their mold, stole a TARDIS and told the Time Lords to fuck off. That's not a Captain America/Superman hero. That's Batman in space with a society of Lex Luthor's. Gotham and Gallifrey. The Doctor saw what they were a part of and broke free, without even knowing the more horrifying truth. Cause it's the thing I see many fans missing because they're so preocuppied with the Doctor being special. The thing that made the Doctor different was their ability to know the difference and walk away to find better. Now, the Doctor has a reason to go back and find out why they never stopped running.

The Time Lords might be the greatest monsters in the universe. It is in the name. "Lords". Those who would lord over us and impose their will with a banthium fist.

And this is a children's show.

C the thing is, the people who made and make this show all collectively rail against one thing: Hate. Kindness is the way of Doctor's. Even if they're sawing off your leg, it's to do the kindness of saving your life. This is because the people who make this (United Kingdomers) have seen centuries of war and conflict and oppression enacted by their own country in the name of progress. And they want to see it no more. Look no further than any of the Doctor's adventures with UNIT. Allways advocating for peace and being ignored for the comfortable war-cry. It's why it's hard to blame the Doctor when we do very similar and often worse (though we don't have time travel.... yet). The creators of this show know better, see better, and wrote better, to know that the powers that be nipped would nip their creations and sanitize them. So they wrote their messages so strong that you can feel them from the future. They're powerfull enough that even across eras they have all collectively moved me to write this.

That's another point I have to laugh at people saying Doctor Who has never been in your face about progressive politics. The Green Death. Survival. Trial of a Timelord (Yes, all of it. Sit down and power through.) The Happiness Patrol is one of my all time favorite episodes for going there in this regard. People may poo poo but history has its' eyes on you. Doctor Who loves taking potshots at the issues of the day. As long as you don't make the aliens black of course. Make them all the colors of the rainbow but never make them black. That'd be too on the nose (That's something they used to say back in the day! Crazy how far we've come).

So bravoa to Chibnall for continuing the legacy of Doctor Who. From where I'm standing, he's not doing anything different than any other showrunner before him. Cause if you want to argue canon, you at least have to know what created it. This show owes what it is to those Classic eras. And if you think Chibnall is shitting on those years and your childhood.... well, then why did you read this whole thing?

42 notes · View notes

neonthewrite · 5 years

Note

Can't go wrong with viri!Colfax/hoomin!Adrian shenanigans (or vice versa, honestly they're both so fun lol)

You’re right! We can’t go wrong with those two! So here’s how they met!

We've seen a similar dynamic in A Little Bit of Magic, though of course that's a much more fantastical AU. This one is back in the slice of life sort of setting, with a small and distrusting Colfax meeting a human who has a touch aversion; probably the best person to discover a viri, honestly.

( DA Link )

~~~

It couldn’t be the worst situation Colfax had found himself in, but it definitely wasn’t the best. He stood rigid behind a tall water bottle and listened. The bottle was the tallest thing on the shelf arranged over his human’s broad desk, and judging by the dust on it, it would remain at least a while longer. Once the human got into his drawing on that strange desk he could light up from beneath, he tended to focus closely on it for quite some time.

Therein lay the problem. Colfax didn’t have a good route back to the floor, let alone into the walls to hide. He didn’t trust that focus to hold up when a viri was in view.

At most, he could lean to the side just enough to peek around the edge of the water bottle. Adrian sat in a familiar pose. One hand combed partially through his pale blond hair while the other guided a drafting pencil along a huge piece of paper. Powder blue eyes focused on the task at hand.

From what Colfax knew, the resident human earned his living through those drawings, most of them showing the layout of buildings or their exteriors. He hadn’t seen many places other than the houses he grew up in and his current apartment complex, but by his knowledge, the drawings captured real life quite well.

That attention to detail might deter a viri from taking up residence near Adrian’s apartment. Colfax remained out of convenience more than anything. Adrian had moved in at the start of summer, and now with fall approaching Colfax had no further desire to move. He’d been careful to learn Adrian’s routine, more or less.

Getting caught out without a route home was embarrassing, but at least no one would ever know. Normally he’d be in the kitchen or the hall closet, not up on the desk or its shelf. No viri would spend too much time in the areas their humans occupied most often.

He had just resigned himself to standing around for at least another hour when Adrian’s chair creaked. A clatter broke the silence, followed by the steady rolling of a pencil down the slanted desk. Adrian blurted out in surprise and Colfax winced.

As the human fumbled after his lost pencil, Colfax tensed and all but refused to breathe.

Then, he drew in a sharp gasp as something hit the desk below, bumping it harshly into the wall. Colfax flinched against the water bottle as the whole shelf rattled. Unfortunately, the water bottle turned out to be much lighter than it looked; it tilted, and Colfax tilted with it.

The next couple of seconds blurred together as fear shot through him like a bolt of lightning. The brief, panicked notion that he’d be seen flitted across his awareness even as the bottle tipped over the edge of the shelf and he stumbled right after it.

He found himself clinging to the edge of the shelf with one hand and didn’t fully remember actually grabbing it. Below, the water bottle landed on Adrian’s outstretched hand. Colfax blinked at it in surprise before his gaze slowly rose to the human’s face.

Adrian stared back in quiet shock with Colfax exactly eye level with him.

The human spared them an awkward silence, if only barely. “Um. What?” He distractedly set the water bottle aside without taking his eyes off of Colfax and his plight. Colfax couldn’t pull his attention away either, though his reasons were different.

Humans didn’t fascinate him all that much. He’d never admit it out loud, but they filled him with more fear than anything else did. No animal represented a loss of control over his life quite like the giant being staring at him.

The hand gripping the edge of the shelf threatened to cramp. With a wince, Colfax took his gaze off Adrian’s awed expression to turn and grab the edge with his other hand. Kicking his legs and straining his arms, he hauled himself back up onto mostly-solid ground. He scrambled back from the edge enough to avoid the risk of falling again, and only then did he return his focus (and a distrusting frown) to Adrian. Any moment now, he suspected, the human would grab for him.

To his surprise, Adrian sighed and rubbed at his eyes instead. “I gotta be hallucinating,” he mumbled.

That was promising. Colfax could work with that. He sought something to say to convince Adrian that he was indeed dreaming up the whole encounter.

Then, Adrian stared at him and went on. “But why would I imagine a … tiny clumsy person? Where’d this even come from?”

Clumsy?!

“I’m not the clumsy one here. You’re making a ruckus,” Colfax snipped, the words spilling out before he could reconsider.

“I--” Adrian stammered, before shutting his mouth and blinking with surprise. The faintest pink hue colored his cheeks, though Colfax couldn’t fathom what would embarrass him. “I guess I did, um, make a bunch of noise just now. Um. Sorry about that, I guess. It probably startled you pretty good and all. Have you, um, been up there the whole time?”

It was Colfax’s turn to not know what to say right away. Adrian had said a lot all at once, and the best part to actually respond to wasn’t clear. He took the easy route. “Since you sat down, yes.”

Adrian’s brow pinched. “I’ve been drawing for two hours,” he realized. “You were hiding up there for two hours? Why?”

“Really?” Colfax asked, skeptical. “You can’t think of a reason?” Inwardly, he kicked himself for snarking at someone who could trap him with absolutely no effort.

Adrian sighed, and then a smile ghosted across his face. Even as he stared openly at Colfax, he seemed less and less likely to respond badly to any snark. He hadn’t once brought a hand close to Colfax’s place on the shelf. “I trapped you up there, didn’t I?” he asked quietly. After Colfax’s hesitant nod, Adrian sighed again. “I guess I get it. S’pose I owe you an apology.”

Colfax frowned, as confused as ever and not wanting to show it. “Why? It’s your house.”

That drew a quiet, raspy laugh out of Adrian. “Okay. Sure. Maybe I should backtrack here. Seeing as I almost knocked you over after making you wait around while I drafted. My name’s Adrian.”

Colfax knew that, but opted not to say so. No need to give away too much at once. Even so, Adrian’s introduction expected a response. Did he dare?

“... I’m Colfax,” he replied, still wary.

#colfax #colfax hammond #adrian #adrian kennet #mywriting #gt #viri!colfax #human!adrian

26 notes · View notes

cherrymoonvol6 · 5 years

Text

some avengers endgame Thoughts cause i saw the movie yesterday and can't stop thinking about it

of course..... spoilers ahead

nebula and tony playing!!!! i just love how nebula's personality comes through without it being ooc

also... nebula carefully sitting tony up. she Cares so much :(

steve immediately going to tony :( like im a stucky kind of gal but holy shit i love them

which was completely erased in the next scene where tony drags steve up and down and after that passes out, which is a confrontation Mood

i wonder how they made tony look so skinny and sick. if it was cgi then i applaud them cause it looked so good

the way they killed thanos so fucking quickly here... i don't know how to feel lmao. like cutting the gauntlet arm and then slicing his neck... that's what we were all screaming at them during infinity war. it's good to see them learn from their mistakes, i guess ?

(can't remember the order in which things happen from now so forgive me if i make a mistake)

i told my sister "that's one of the russos!!!!!" so it took me ten seconds to realize that the russo was the gay character everyone was talking about (i thought it would be fury for no other reason than it being shocking and fury having very little to do with the plot, but)

and steve being supportive of that :( man out of time said gay rights!

carol's new hair!! holy shit!!!!!

rocket insinuating carol has been experimenting with more hairstyles... i would like to see it

don't think i missed that carol x rhodey nod. i support it.

don't wanna say it now... for now ill just state: i love what they're doing with natasha in the movie. she truly feels like a friend to steve. like that small gesture of her sliding the plate towards steve is just so domestic and beautiful! it really makes her feel so human and complex at the end. i was so worried about her being wasted but i loved her throughout the film

it was a fucking rat who got scott out. i have to laugh.

also is that the guy from that old "gayyyyy" meme????

cassie is all grown up!!!!!! i can't even imagine how hard it had been for her

also what happened to her mom? and the stepdad??? are they fine????? i hope so

i was hoping we would get more tony as a dad in this movie and it delivered!! tony is so fucking good with kids. the bond between him and morgan was so well portrayed

also the place they live in is so cozy and that's what he deserves

when steve stepped down the car in that black outfit with the leather jacket on i gasped... he's fucking gorgeous

i kept wanting him and tony to kiss lmao tf is wrong with me

OKAY my hawkeye rights. i missed him so much

the stylish subtitles on the middle of the screen felt like too much. this isn't a tumblr gifset honey, just write them down!

thinking about the whole clintasha conversation really foreshadows the whole thing. natasha cares so deeply about clint and really puts his needs before hers. it's so beautiful to see

honestly... my clintasha rights!

i think the hulk/bruce scene was kinda endearing but then the ant man banter dragged on for toooo long

the dab i YELLED. these poor kids have to stand this man on 2023 pulling out 2016 trends to appear Hip and Cool

fat thor...... i hate how it was handled. hate it so fucking much.

new asgard! that's so cute. i hope that's on norway

miek and korg are alive!!!!

the thought of thor insulting a possibly 14 year old on fortnight is too much for me. it sounds like bad fanon talk. i still laughed (bc noobmaster69??? that's fucking hilarious)

tonys reaction to i love you 3000 is so beautiful. like the way he looks taken aback and so happy. i love irondad

steve in a white shirt and jeans!!!! i gasped again. he's delivering, the fucking model

i know they were like, barely being decent to each other again, but i still wanted my stony hug:(

when they're discussing their infinity stones memories and natasha and tony are laying down together on a table???? adorable. amazing.

also why tf didn't nebula said the soul stone required a sacrifice??? i thought that's what she got from gamora dying in volmir

as soon as natasha and clint arrived to volmir i began chanting "nonononononononono"

fuckkdjdksndk fucking nebula. cue to more nononono chanting

rhodey knocking out quill with a single hit is the funniest scene in the movie

clintasha calling on bullshit on the sacrifice thing was also quite funny

the forehead touch :((( im so weak! so sad!

clintasha literally fighting each other to be each other's sacrifice!!!! kill me now!!!!

jeez now i can finally say it: scarjo shined so fucking much on this movie!!!! her delivery was amazing, i really felt a connection between her and the avengers, it really showed her growth during the five year time jump. she fucking killed it. she did her best and she's the best black widow we could've ever gotten.

clint mourning her :((((( probably the third time i cried during the movie

thor's panic attack being used for cheap laughs was the most uncomfortable moment for me... or any scene where people only saw thor as Fat and Lazy (basically, two thirds of the movie)

the freya + thor reunion was so sweet though!

okay. okay. hear me out. tony was on a very serious mission to regain an infinity stone. and the first thing he does is check out steve's ass. and aknowledge how glorious it is. i couldn't believe what i was watching!!!!!! like that actually fucking happened. consider me a fully formed stony bitch.

and scott joining in to say it was "america's ass" ???? poetic cinema

so it's canon that everyone checks out steve's ass and appreciates it as a national treasure. that's all i never thought id needed.

steve saying "hail hydra" i YELLED. it was a nice nod to the whole "cap is a nazi" mess

and steve fighting himself... hot

using his bucky trauma to shock himself is :/// but also :((((

i loved that for one moment i knew everyone on the theatre was staring at steve's ass

and steve being appreciative of his own butt!!!! ok that's all i have to say about steve's ass

i loved the reminder that thor was still kinda goofy back in avengers 1, for everyone who says taika completely changed his character. and the little tony + thor moment was adorable

"howard..... potts" i can understand tony being a mess but how did howard not suspect of anything??? elevator lady took one look of steve's face and all of her alarms started ringing

peggy carter... ive missed my wife so much

did peggy marry souza. i hope she did. steve tf are you doing staring at a married woman (jk)

clint kicking the stones away as soon as bruce is done with the snap is the biggest mood

also... the hell was scott looking at that made him think it had worked? just... more birds outside? i was really curious

the irony of the only avenger without superpowers being left with the stones

"i know you" *hands out stones* how can you not love clint, he's so pure

nebula killing his 2014 self is a power move. that would be me if i met my 2014 self

thor with a braided beard!!!!! beautiful

thanos is like, a real threat and i love that

okay. i kinda saw it coming. i saw thor leave mjolnir behind and i thought "oh????". and then the shock of thanos being able to wield stormbreaker. and then fucking mjolnir moving!!!!! i was the only person in the theatre who yelled

but seriously!!!! steve wielding AND fighting with mjolnir!!!!! couldn't stop thinking about it all day!!!!!!!!! STEVE IS WORTHY!!!!!!!

parallels to thor going for the chest. it never works babies!

and just.... this was steve's moment. steve i-can-do-this-all-day rogers really fighting with every ounce of his body and soul against the most powerful being on earth. justice for him getting knocked after touching thanos for one second in iw!

and steve getting up again! all dirty and wounded!! trembling with exhaustuation and resolution!!! with his broken shield on his arm!!!! just him facing the biggest army of the universe!!!!! so powerful

sorry to destroy this epic moment, but like, okay. people had been reintegrated to life like, twenty minutes before. and i understand that they were all confused and out of place. but sam really needed ALL that time to just... try to communicate with steve????? ok

the "avengers..." *brings mjolnir with one hand while bracing his shield with the other* "assemble" moment was... oh my God. chills all over my body.

that One Moment where steve has stormbreaker on his hand... so fucking hot

the tony and peter reunion holy shit. the hug was everything i needed! like please just hug tony stark for ages

and tony and pepper fighting together!!! that's a power couple right there

i felt it when quill looked at gamora and just... stopped. im so sad his moment was played for laughs when it was obviously such an important moment for his character

thanos was so fucking scared of wanda that he put his own troops at risk to stop her for a little while. strongest avenger right there!

and carol coming back!!!! i was like

i felt so relieved at that point. i was like "yeah thanos is fucking over what's next"

no need to talk about all the women coming together to defend peter :')

thanos getting the gauntlet again... the nonono chanting came back

fucking CAROL trying to stop him. looking at him with such a determined face, like "you can't stop me from stopping you". it was so powerful he had to snatch one stone to stop her

and strange giving him the one finger to tony.... i knew what was coming holy shit. i knew it. they knew it.

tony really proved himself there. it was his best scene on the entire mcu, don't argue with me!!!!!! the way he stood there and took all the power of the stones, unmasked, unaffected, powerful and almighty

"i am... iron man" cue to ugly sobbing

tony knew there was no other way. pepper did, too... she knew exactly what she had to tell him. she was right. tony spent all of these years moved by selfishness first, then fear, then guilt. an endless battle since thanos was on his head. but the war was over. what mattered was that he saved everyone, and he sacrificed himself for everyone. a complete 180° from last movie's ending.... wow

gotta said... peter there felt a little bit out of place for me. i think it would've been more powerful if he didn't say anything, though peter is a teenager, i can get it

his arc with steve felt unfinished, too. i would've liked to see steve's reaction as well, since tony had told him he wanted everyone back and also for his family so survive. but whatever

im not against tony killing thanos instead of gamora and nebula but i would've liked if we saw them react to his death, at least:/ like a little parallel between nebula's reaction at the beginning and the end of endgame

the One stucky interaction here was pulled from cap1 and iw. i feel betrayed

bucky Knew what steve was going to do. i wonder if steve told him before or bucky just sensed it

you can't convince me steve would go back and carelessly dance with peggy knowing his friend is being used like a weapon by hydra and bound to kill tonys parents. nah nah. it all felt wrong

my steggy rights!!!

love that the russos foreshadowed cap!bucky on tws just to give the shield to sam at the end

anyways what the fuck bucky was all steve had but he lived the happiest life without it and left him alone on the 21st century? okay fuck y'all

#long post #avengers endgame #endgame spoilers #avengers spoilers #avengers endgame spoilers #a4 spoilers #mine #marvel #this is.... so long and idk how to add a read more on mobile #but enjoy my thoughts i guess

24 notes · View notes

icharchivist · 5 years

Note

*double irony if he also gets blamed for Cross’s involvement* Lol! I could totally see that and Allen's (and Lavi's) reaction would be priceless! Oh yeah like I could totally see there being a radical group of bookman who want Allen to suffer consequences for things he's not even aware of just to follow strict bookman protocol. Lavi would be in a delicate position of how to even defend Allen. Ecspecially if the main reason Allen is being targeted is because they're trying to attack Lavi's -

2 position as successor. We might get some heavy divide w/half of the members loyal to Bookman Sr choices and the other half rejecting them. Who knows if Allen is still unstable in some way he might get paranoid about Lavi's loyalty to him (like he did w/Johnny and Kanda) and think Lavi brought him here on purpose for trial. He's stresses enough w/2 sides after him. Now another wants him. Ugh erasing Allen's memories would be the worst thing for him. It'd literally kill him. Maybe he does-

3 get his memories erased by the bookman and Lavi has to reawaken them before Nea takes over. That in turn causes past Allen's memories to come back and that's a whole new can of worms opened.

Bookman trial: Actually another thing that could happen is that Lavi has to suffer Allen having lost his memory of Lavi. Which not only devastates Lavi losing his friend like that. It becomes a problem when Allen starts awakening as a Noah but Johnny and Kanda are no where to use friendship to keep Allen awake. Maybe Lavi is also sentenced to have his memory of Allen erased since Allen infected him. Lavi has to fight to keep his memories intact and bring Allen's memories of him back in time.

;O You know what would make me laugh if he gets blamed for Cross’s involvement in front of Lavi, is that Lavi was there and one of the ones to directly react to Allen’s reaction in being blamed for Cross’s debt by the Jasdebi. I hate to say again “this would be a parallelism to” but that would be goddamn hilarious. Because Lavi would have had a direct thing to remember about to parallel that. And they both would be done “you gotta be kidding me. Again, really? again?!”

(which also makes me think about Lavi being also there and suffering from Cross’s promises to the villagers in the Krory’s arc. How did Lavi get to be involved in scenes Allen was suffering from Cross’s actions that much?

And y’know what that would be pretty interesting? to show extreme within the Bookman Clan who, just like say the Order with the Crows would be overzealous in protecting their secrets.

And i could see the Bookman Clan having a mixed feelings on Lavi: hell perhaps that would be even why Lavi would have to pass some tests like that: those who wants to support him have to prove that he’s worthy of it and those who wants him gone would take it as an opportunity to sabotage him.

(For now we’re assuming a lot about a Clan we’ve seen maybe 2 to 3 people of outside of our two Bookmen- And so far it was, if they are indeed from the Clan, That Little Girl, That Buff Woman, and perhaps that Creepy Old Man. It may be cliché to expect the Buff Woman to be kinder? She seemed the supportive type. Little Girl seemed to have emotions shut down, more neutral. Creepy Old Man was creepy. who knows what the rest of the Clan can offer - but yeah it’s fair to think there might be a few people to support Lavi in this. Perhaps even people who would support the changes he would want to make, if he gets lucky. ... not that Lavi is exactly the Lucky type.)

Allen starting to fear for Lavi’s loyalty would be so painful though oh boy but it’s possible, esp with his life atm and knowing that Lavi is loyal to the Bookmen first - he never hide that after all. Let’s just hope that Lavi’s poor state post-torture might have Allen give him a chance somewhat?

But then after all Allen had been through that wouldn’t be a reach to believe this sort of hings (how many debts he had ended up confronted with with the same kind of trick do you think). Having a third side after him seems like just the kind of Luck Allen has.

And yeah I pretty much think so too for erasing Allen’s memory. That’s pretty much what keep his sense of self intact, especially with Nea acting on. It would be complex to see how Lavi would have to bring those memories back (and even if bringing Current!Allen’s memories back wouldn’t accidentally unlock Past!Allen’s memories back. That seems risky and dangerous for Allen’s sense of self). But yeah Lavi could play a part helping him out the way Allen helped him out in the Ark. Would give a precise “mental battle to not let your past self win over you” too

And ooooooh my Allen losing his memories of Lavi and Lavi having to endure it would be DEVASTATING. If they only erase Lavi it could have somewhat make Lavi grounding him to his humanity despite the memory loss to awaken it backmakes Lavi seem even more dangerous to the Bookmen perhaps? Bc that would be a bound so strong, a Bookman caring so bad that it broke the abilities and rules of the Bookmen themselves.

And Lavi having to lose the memories of Allen and having to fight to keep them... holy hell that would be intense and dangerous for him. Honestly I think this could be the worst path even for Lavi, he cares too much about how much he can remember things, and letting go of Allen seems too much for him to handle.

if it’s while Allen had lost his memories too that would make for a disastrous combo especially with the threat of Nea lurking, having Lavi being pressed against the rules of the Clan and time to try to save his friend.

That.. would be a hell.

... Let’s just hope that for all the douchebags Bookman Clansmates we’re imagining there would be some serious support in there too because otherwise they’re pretty much doomed.....

#weep help this is amazing #honestly we're going further and further into exploring every bad situation #but at this point i'm also ready to read fics about that topic that'd be fun as hell #ichafantalks dgm #bookmenstuff #Anonymous #ichareply

2 notes · View notes

helloandwelcometomariasblog · 3 years

Text

Review #76: Record of Youth (Ep 11-12)

I have felt two main things while watching the past few episodes.

The first is a somewhat positive feeling towards some of the new conflicts that have been taking place. I wasn't sure what it was that made those conflicts feel so real and deep, and then I realised that it was Park Bogum's acting. I don't think he was this good back in Love in the Moonlight. Or more like, the story didn't allow for such subtle facial acting. His prince character in that drama wasn't as deep or multi-dimensional as Hyejun is. All the prince character did was be obsessively in love and get angry and look good and smart. Almost every time he was provoked by that annoying counsellor for the king, he was somehow able to keep calm and always fight back with sarcasm.

Hyejun, on the other hand, feels more real. He deals with real emotions and shows each and every small emotional change to the audience. It's really amazing how subtle those changes are but how clearly they show on his face.

I've really liked the conflict he's been having with Jeongha lately. It's real and raw and the drama doesn't make it into mere comedy. I think there are a few scenes that stood out to me (well, provided almost all of their scenes together being conflict scenes now). The first one is when they brush against a serious conflict for the very first time. Before this moment, they never address anything seriously, and both of them kind of brush it off. Usually Jeongha brushes it off as though she's never hurt and she always understands. I used to think she was mature for doing that. I used to think, that's what adult dating is about. But now I'm not so sure.

Jeongha does the same thing this time round, but you can tell there's discomfort and unsaid words hanging in the air. It's the scene where Jeongha jokingly tells Hyejun that she's had inconveniences from his sudden fame too, then when Hyejun's all ears about it, she brushes it off again and makes the atmosphere light by lying and saying that she's a busy woman too with her own personal studio.

This scene kind of pained me. Not just this scene, but with every Hyejun-Jeongha scene we get now, it's just tension and unsaid words all round. They never have a frank discussion about how they're feeling and where their relationship is headed and it really pains me. Like I said, I used to think it was the adult thing to do - to swallow petty feelings and understand the other person, talk and act in a way that doesn't make them feel bad, pretend to be positive. But seeing Jeongha, my thoughts are changing. Is this the downfall of being too independent and self-sufficient in life? We all know that Jeongha doesn't like getting help from people. We also know that she doesn't like sharing her troubles with others either. She said it once, something like, love means not sharing your heavy burden. Something like that. I agreed with it back then and nodded my head, but I'm really getting second thoughts seeing how her relationship with Hyejun is turning out.

If you can't be honest with your partner... it's not good. Jeongha is just pretending 24/7 that she's okay and that she's not the type to get sad and angry over the "trivial" things. That she's not petty. But it's all an act. She is sad and angry. And that above scene was pretty powerful because Hyejun's face just falls at the possibility that he might've hurt Jeongha. Hyejun as a character is so expressive and honest with his feelings, I think that may be another reason why Jeongha hesitates from being completely honest. If I had a partner who reacted to each and every emotional change I was going through, I might be like Jeongha too.

But still, it needs to be shared. Sigh, dating is hard. You just can't avoid conflict. Yeah, there's the dreamy side to it and that's what you get when you first start off usually but conflict hits you pretty quickly too. And then it's just conflict all throughout and having to deal with that and talk through every itsy bitsy feeling and thought. Tiring. Very tiring.

Anyways, going back to Hyejun and Jeongha. The actual serious conflict they have though is when that article about Jia goes through. Hyejun goes to see Jeongha and you can just tell she's not happy. She doesn't even smile - or even force a smile - as Hyejun comes through the door. What really bothers me and something I just don't understand is why there's no physical affection every time they meet up. If I hadn't seen my dear boyfriend for a long time and he came over, I would be hugging him at least! But these two never greet or farewell each other with a hug or a kiss. I don't get it. They've done even more than that already and they don't feel the desire to be physically close to each other every time they meet?

Or maybe that's just a sign of them becoming even more distant with each other as time goes by - which makes me even more sad. Not seeing them bond, both emotionally and physically, is just sad for someone who used to ship them. There's just too much tension and discomfort in the air - but let's face it, it's necessary and natural with their current situation.

Even rewatching that scene where they fight (somewhat calmly) for the first time brings back the tense feeling I got back then. They both start off trying to ease the atmosphere by smiling a bit, and then Jeongha gets (very calmly) angry for the first time - how come you never discuss these things with me beforehand? Why do you make me go through a million thoughts by myself? And Hyejun is right, she's super calm but that makes it even scarier. Hyejun at this point is still trying to keep it light. They're both similar in that sense. They're both calm and they both try and avoid conflict. Then Jeongha bursts out for the first time (albeit still calmly) and you can see the changes in Hyejun's expression. Jeongha's annoyed face and Hyejun's surprised and hurt face are both faces we've never really seen from them in Hyejun-Jeongha scenes and that's what makes it very special. I guess this is the moment in a relationship where you realise that your partner can be just as unlovely as some of the other people around you. It's reality though. Even Hyejun gets a little heated as he lets out his own honest feelings about the matter. The atmosphere gets tense and uncomfortable.

BUT. It's at this moment where Hyejun extends his hand to Jeongha. I think this is a key moment. Hyejun decides to bridge the gap and change that tense atmosphere. Jeongha puts her hand in his and then Hyejun says, I love you much more than you think.

Then, as the episode continues, I'm sitting there thinking - really? Because the more I watch, the less I'm starting to believe that. And if I'm like this, how little of it would Jeongha be believing?

I started seeing more of their relationship deteriorate when Hyejun couldn't get Jeongha's call and called her later in the hotel in Singapore. By that time, Jeongha was already at home from being picked up by Hyehyo. Damn, what a move. I guess this scene shows just how tired Jeongha has become, to resort to calling her boyfriend's friend, someone she knows might have feelings for her. She would have never done that in the past. But she's tired now and she really needs someone to care about her. She shouldn't have done that though. Seeing her invite Hyehyo into her house and avoid talking to Hyejun on the phone for long made me feel icky as heck. She didn't even tell Hyejun that Hyehyo was over - just to not make him worry. That honestly feels wrong. And seeing Hyejun's face drop when Jeongha lightly rejects his request of talking on the phone for long, that was painful too. You can just tell that at that moment their relationship is clearly declining.

But then again - does Hyejun really love Jeongha? If he did, he would have at least checked his phone on the plane. There's wifi and everything on the plane now, we all know that. He could have, but all he did was watch a movie. If he really loved Jeongha, he would have thought about her at least once. That's the downfall of this so-called "mature" relationship between these two. They're both so independent and so used to doing everything by themselves, they don't feel the need to reach out to their partner, to be perfectly honest with them about their feelings, and depend on them. Dating is hard. That is the conclusion.

I really need to stop writing and continue the drama, but I just have to mention that I loved the conflict scene between Hyejun and Hyehyo too. That was some raw emotion and I liked how the boys didn't fight physically. It's more interesting when they fight with words and it contains much more complex emotions. One day I really gotta sit down and ask myself why I'm so obsessed with conflict scenes and why I like them so much. Probably because I like seeing characters show their emotions so freely and become raw and honest with the people they care about. Maybe I find it cathartic because I myself suck at doing that and avoid it at all costs.

ONE more thing to mention before I leave. I absolutely hate the reporter. I know the actress from heart signal, but I feel like I've never hated a character so much. She's just downright fucking evil. She has no other character trait than being a bitch. At least Lee Taesu has a backstory and has some hardships of his own and has a brat like Doha giving him hell. That journalist has absolutely no other character trait than being a selfish money-hungry biatch. Whenever I see her, I swear I lose a little bit of faith in humanity. I've actually started understanding Hyejun's dad little by little and I've really liked seeing the feelings and changes he is going through, along with the difficulties in his heart as Hyejun rises to stardom, but this journalist? Just no. When she's at the police station trying to get a scoop and repeating, "strong denial means it's true" I honestly wanted to slap her hard on the face. There are quite a few people in this drama that are a bit too angering and that's one of the few negatives of the show.

I'm pretty sure I had one more thing to discuss here but I can't fully remember now. Oh yes - I remembered. Just about the entertainment industry in general. It's been crazy seeing how obsessed people are with celebrities and it's been disgusting seeing how obsessed some people are with seeing them fail. It's actually made me not want to read any news of them from now on. It feels pointless. There are so many rumours going around daily about all sorts of celebrities. We will probably never know the full truth about them. I think I'd rather just not look into them in the first place.

#review

0 notes