#they developed meowing the way they do because it helps them communicate with humans
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Made from the same wood - Oneshot
Summary: turns out being made of palistrom wood has its perks
Post canon, Hunter is now living in the owl house and it's after getting into okay terms with Amity, him being a grimwalker and being made of palistrom wood makes him able to understand other palismen
It’s not something I 100% have as a headcanon or expect to happen, I just think this concept is neat! I got inspired by other fanfics delving into Hunter being a grimwalker changing some things on him. Also I’m testing out a placeholder name for Lil Rascal
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That small cat was starting to get on his nerves.
Always asking for food when she was on the first floor of the owl house, smacking his face with her little white paws demanding cuddles always when he was wearing his black shirt, filling it with fur, going way too far when playing with Pascal, he always had to get them away from her before her claws did any damage.
And today, she was on his lap making biscuits on his knee, his hands tensing up at every claw almost piercing his skin, using all his might to not scream at her. No matter what, do not scream at her . She wasn't doing it out of malice, she's just a cat palisman. It still hurt like stinging sand but he held out every yelp.
But his limit was inching really close.
He closed his eyes, hands balled up into fists resting on the table, and took a deep breath.
"Can you stop??" Even so, his voice came out harsher than he intended, looking down at the palisman, who flinched and stared at him with her icy blue eyes, paws now stopping the kneading. "You need to tell Amity to cut your nails again, you’re kneading my leg raw!"
She scrunched up her nose, answering him with a rude meow.
"Don't call me that!"
"Mrow!"
"You're the one who did that!"
"MAOW!!"
"Oh you little-"
"...What are you doing?"
Looking up, Hunter found both Luz and Amity staring at him from the other side of the table, with puzzled faces. He looked away for a second, passing his hand through his hair, accidentally waking up Pascal and making them get out of their little hiding spot there.
"I'm sorry, I...I should have asked her to stop before, I-"
"... I'm not talking about that - though you better not repeat this - just… what are you doing?"
"Uh...doing what?"
"You were talking to my cat like you understood her."
"I do understand her, what’s so weird about it?"
The two furrowed their brows even more, looking at eachother for a moment.
"You understand??" Luz pointed at him with the spoon she was holding. "She's not even your palisman!"
Oh.
Slowly the gears turned into place in his brain
"...I guess other witches can't really… do that, right?"
"We don't. Is that another one of the Grimwalker things?" Amity tapped her fingers on the table, calling her cat, Ghost going from his lap to hers.
"Eh, maybe? I'm still trying to find more about it"
He looked down at the page of the book he was taking notes about, before being rudely distracted by Ghost. It was hard to find anything about what he was, it's not like it was something really talked about like other magical creations. Kinda hard to bring up a lot about how you artificially create a witch to be used for not really great things without getting some weird looks.
"There's palistrom wood in the middle of the ingredients, maybe it does have something to do with that." He continued, fidgeting with his loose hair strand.
“So you’re like, a witch palisman?”
“...Not exactly like that, Luz. But I suppose palistrom wood has anything created from it able to communicate with other palismen and things like that.”
“Kinda ironic, don’t you think?”
His ears burned while he stared at the book, feeling Pascal perch on his shoulder, avoiding looking at the human.
“You’re never going to let the Latissa thing go, are you?”
“Nope”
"... That's fair."
"And why did you, you know, never question this before?"
"It's not like I got to interact with palismen a lot before Pascal showed up. And then after that, i just didn't think much about it, i thought everyone kinda understood them." He pet the cardinal’s head, smiling softly at them. "They're pretty chatty actually..."
"Must be nice to understand them."
"Eh, it's questionable."
A quiet meow came from under the table after Hunter said that, making him chuckle.
"Aaaand there's my proof"
"A palisman whisperer" Luz snorted "you can add that to your titles now"
"I'll think about that"
The three went back to the silence that was there before, returning to what they were doing. The book talked a little about the ingredients to create a Grimwalker, similar to the one Belos had on his personal library, that he never could get a good look on, but there wasn't much more than that on it.
Thinking about this still made his head spin, it was really advanced magic and did not really have much about anything after creating a being like him, besides some few annotations about checking through how far in development it was. Great. Just absolutely great.
He just wanted to know if there’s anything he should know about himself. He wasn’t made like other witches, he was made from wild magic, it must have done something else different on him besides understanding palismen and being useful on the Day of Unity, something, anything, that could happen in the future. He needed to know.
And the research kept on going nowhere and repeating everything he already knew.
"Do you think the other ingredients also affect you?"
“Huh?” Hunter raised his eyes from the book, head supported by his hand.
“Like this thing with palismen happening because you’re made of wood, could the other ingredients do something like that?”
“Probably, but I’m not sure about what is or isn’t caused by all this” He wiggled his fingers towards the illustration on the book. “There’s barely anything here that isn’t what I already know.”
“We could try finding other books about it if you want”
“Thanks, Luz” he sighed, closing the notebook. “But I’m getting tired of running into dead ends.”
“You don’t need to g-”
“It’s okay. I’m fed up with it and...maybe it’s good to know where to stop. And I’m stopping here.”
“...Okay then. I won’t push you.”
He got up from the chair and got to the other side of the table, looking at the recipe list.
“Is this another recipe from the human realm?”
“Yeah! It’s chocolate cake! Want to help?”
He smiled, rolling up his sleeves.
“I do.”
#the owl house#toh#hunter toh#golden guard#luz noceda#amity blight#lil rascal#grimwalker#writing#alec writes#alec talks
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To anyone who thinks texting is a billion times worse than talking on the phone and that texting is a miscommunication disaster ready to happen: I get you. You're probably 100% exactly like my friend who I hate texting despite how i rather appreciate talking with them on call or in-person.
Hear me out, though. Please.
You know what's weird? I love talking with my other friend on text more than i talk with them in real life. No, it's not because they're untalkative irl. No, it's not because they have a different personality in text. No, it's not because they have any trouble whatsoever communicating in-person (more than the usual trouble everyone sometimes deals with).
It's because I'm the one with the auditory communication issues. I stammer and stutter, I can't forward my opinion in that microscopic pause between people talking, i can't think quickly when i or someone else is speaking, i can't think quickly, and i can't double check my grammar when ive already said something - among other problems.
And that friend i like to text? Just so happens to be skilled at texting.
Yes, texting well is a skill. Something that you can learn and cultivate and look up on Google. So if you hate texting and find it irredeemable, you probably don't have the skill for it. But you can still learn just by using your normal speaking skills while remembering and sticking with only a few bitty - yet crucial - rules of texting.
You may not want to learn to text. You may want to speak and text only when necessary. You may defend your point by stating that texting lacks key human communication, such as body language, tone of voice, rhythm of voice, and other context that adds to the meaning of words in a way texting could never have. Aaaand you'd be right, actually. Italics and bold and emojis/emoticons and writing style can only do so much while the imagination fills in the gaps - and unlike with books, if the imagination sees/hears something terrible in a text, it's offensive instead of interesting.
So, what about the people who don't have the skill to make coherent, intelligent sentences with their mouth in the first place? The context doesn't help too much, then. Of course, why should you have to learn how to text when clearly these people who are afflicted by their inability to speak should be learning how to talk, because it's more effective and healthier for them that way?
You're right, they should be learning. And they are! There's no avoiding speaking in real life unless you're mute, selectively mute (let's be understanding), deaf (sometimes they learn to speak and that's awesome), or something else I can't think of. Those with speech impediments - when they don't know sign or there's no one who knows sign nearby - are generally forced to try to speak, and are constantly training to communicate well. People with social anxiety don't want to be afraid of talking, and especially if you befriend someone with social anxiety in real life and talk with them in-person, they'll try their best to open up in-person too. And me? Who can't think fast enough to speak for some reason? I'm trying to change that, too. I hate being unable to speak as well as I text, because speaking is more efficient.
But it would still be really, really nice to have a deliciously complex conversation sometimes, and for those of us with trouble speaking, we developed the skill of texting to better fulfill that human need to communicate and share. We're trying to speak. But.. it would be really nice of you to text.
To text more than just "okay"
To elaborate on "I can't"
To exclaim more than only "ah"
To give something that isn't difficult to find a specific response to.
And it can be easy to; we text-savvy people swear our hearts on it!! Google provides lots of good links when you search "how to text well," but I'll sum up a few common tips to texting with meaning.
Text proportionally. This is probably the only rule you need to remember, because all-in-all, the best way to text someone (if they're not sending one or two words a text) is to follow in their example. If they ask your opinion? Tell them yours and ask theirs. If they send texts of two or three sentences each? It's polite to try responding with the same magnitude (keyword: try. You can't always do it). They send you a paragraph? You don't have to send one back (even though that'd be real cool) but if they seem to be expecting a thorough response, don't be afraid to tell them you can't think of much. Just make sure you follow tip #2. Just imagine what it's like talking to a cat that only meows vaguely at you in response. Maybe you think the cat is smart enough to somewhat understand, and you're getting the chance to let your thoughts out at it, but getting basically nothing back is kind of boring.
Dont send curt, few-worded answers. This includes saying just "k" or "ah" or part of a sentence that you're never gonna finish. It sends the message that you're not interested in thinking about whatever the person texting you just said. Sometimes you can send a tiny response as a joke, but do it over and over again, and the other person will think you're never interested in talking. If you're not interested in talking (not just in text, i mean audibly too), it'd be less rude to simply say your not up for talking, with a short, polite apology.
Respond as soon as possible to a genuine question. If you need to think, say so. If you can't respond just yet, say so. This is a personal thing for me. I'm in the middle of a conversation that has been active for a while, i ask an important (sometimes timed) question, and nobody responds for an hour. I lose confidence and take the silence as "no, don't be ridiculous," and take back what i said. Then, very suddenly, i get a response finally informing me that someone needed to ask their mom and the conversation took a while, or they were researching the question, or chores suddenly came up, or etc etc. People get busy all the time, and especially on text, it's easy to suddenly drop out because something irl shows up. But it's hard to tell the difference between being ignored, missed, or being considered. Your excuses are valid, but even a vague "brb" and then later a quick explanation would be more informative than straight silence.
If you need to leave in the middle of a conversation that's been very active, say so. Building off of the last one, it's just polite to be informative. Now, you don't have to say you're doing this at some specific location for a particular amount of hours and you'll be hanging out with whats-their-name and then you'll go into the bathroom and pick your nose in the mirror - no, you don't have to be specific. Just make it clear that you'll be gone for a bit and you'll get back to the conversation another vague time. It's polite, that's all, and alleviates the worries of all us anxious individuals who think "oh no did i say something wrong its been like 20 minutes and they left suddenly-"
Try to leave an avenue of conversation open for the other person to pick up on. This one is easy because generally, all you need to do is think of an open-ended question that isnt yes-or-no. Say something, then ask a question that relates to what you said that the other person can add to. Like.. the other person said they like a certain band, and you like that band, too. You could tell them your favorite song from them and gush about why, then ask what their favorite song is and why? Then it's up to them to give a good response.
If a conversation turns exhausting because you feel like you're pulling all the weight, then drop it and politely say goodbye. There's all these tips about good texting but sometimes, when you can't bring the other person out of their shell or they are genuinely uninterested, it's because they are the ones not doing their part in the conversation. You've tried your best, and if they wont thank you, then I will. And someone in your future who knows how to text and is interested in what you have to say will thank you in their heart. Just, not the person who you're walking away from right now.
Observe the texting "body language" of others. This sounds weird, but examples of this would be using bold to outline the absolute importance of things, italics to slightly emphasize something, s p a c i n g to signify your mind being blown, emojis to express light emotion (unless someone uses way too many, which, that's just a bad habit and sometimes an art form), "ha" for sarcastic laughter, fjsjskajfjie for real laughter, ALL CAPS for high energy, etc. Im sure you can Google it, too, otherwise you can just learn from experience. It's all generally very universal unless you meet a Homestuck, and pretty soon, picking out and giving out emotions in everyday text will be a little easier.
That's all I got right now. Thank you for reading this far and indulging me with this topic. It's okay if you want to keep your avenues of conversation far away from texting, because it's all your own choice, but just know that if you ever do find someone interesting who speaks better in text, it's not impossible for you to communicate with them as well in that format. Just takes practice :) (<- that's a genuine, gentle smile, otherwise I would use c: or :3. Someone else may use it differently, however. Think of it like my personal accent.)
#important#just needed to rant that for a bit#that friend i mentioned who cant text? i love her but she's frustrating#she thinks she's never gonna be able to text well#and im screaming internally because i cant call (my background is noisy and i can't hear well)#and im not sure how to give her some tips without her vaguely saying okay#and maybe perhaps saying that she's simply better at speaking and she'll leave it at that#which breaks my heart but okay ill just go talk to someone else#still#i needed to rant#if anyone can add some extra tips that would be... delicious#texting#communication#miscommunication#text#text vs call
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i said i would talk about saizon and usually i would be under the influence. but i am not yet. read the * at end of the post first if u want clarification of overall.
i might mention torfight (will refer as f/t) but if anyone gets upset just chill. it’s a really inconsequential opinion. the chances of someone stumbling upon this means nothing. it isnt’ a compare and contrast just how i personally feel while viewing these shows. and i probably want to dive into what this means in a broader context since i have all the time and brain space in the world
from the first encounter of saifah and zon or their first encounter outside of their “kiss” (LOL? so unnecessary) it was clear that as awkward as it could or may be there was natural chemistry. which i want my tiny head to explore.
so a lot of BL (which is like....tv and movies etc in general anyways) hell even dramas may have a less sexual undertone to get to where they are going. which i think is a problem with tv in general (a friend was bringing this up with the new rules of social distancing on set which...capitalism but whatever) where sex is a vehicle for connection. a lot of BLs can be explicit i suppose, but in the west it’s like jumping into bed is a huge base for a lot of couples. also everyone fucks too much who cares.
but sex, kisses, hookups, any nudity, etc is not a placeholder for like actual intimacy, romantic love, showing love. that’s part of why i hate the concept of love at first sight, at least the way it plays out. you can really like someone, hell maybe even love, when you see them or feel this bond but the bond isn’t because you TOUCHED them.
there’s a difference between natural chemistry and forced. natural chemistry is what you would prefer which is why casting directors have literally chemistry tests to test your compatibility as actors, with a writer/director, and on camera. there can be people whose chemistry develops and we see the potential, or people who we know don’t love each other IRL and this is acting but it’s still powerful. but this always means you have to give them the time and space. actors can jump in/out of character but it’s human nature. if two peopl eare meeting for the first time and have to simulate sex there’s going to be this natural like...strangeness. obviously. viewers can see it.
so when you get two people who click irl and it doesn’t always have to be romantic or sexually it’s kind of more of a thrill. very obviously mii2 are a lot more flexible around each other so it is less mechanic. i think i like watching tharntype because even tho i feel like parts of it seriously need some oil, i can see and understand a relationship developing through their characters as they act (and i do not particularly think they are good actors.)
the friendship that saizon display—whether we think it is spontaneous and too quick or not—is legitimately nice. and they are very obviously comfortable with each other. i guess there can be an idea of romantic friendship (but idk abt that one, we dont have to fucking label everything you can love someone so deeply in your own way outside of our parameters bla bla capitalism ruining everything bla bla individualism)
they got in each others faces, then would do very weird shit together, because that’s who they are. for me personally i think being able to have fun with your partner is iMPERATIVE. one of my fav moments is when they fucking meow at each other (which i know is a thai joke, right? idk) and it is so weird but you can tell they understand the way they communicate?
to me like...having someone you feel something deep with is that there’s this role you guys are playing, it’s a joke you started, and with the best kind of intimacy and love your partner can keep it going, keep it rolling, hang it up in the air and you guys just go back adn forth....forever lol
i also legitimately think it is important to hammer home the fact that you are yourself without a partner and i really resent a message that makes it seem like you can’t live without someone. maybe a lack of saizon was good that way. like they existed as two seperate people. their love and attraction weren’t the only thing going for them. it was just natural and very nice.
this particular display of romance and affection is one that’s strong but doesn’t take itself too seriously. not because you don’t want to lose them but because there’s enough security. or like, it’s really guided by this unspeakable feeling you feel with another person.
i’m not sure if that means soulmates but it’s something close. saifah doesn’t expect zon to be someone he can’t, but it doesn’t mean he has to let himself go completely for him. when he expressed being sad that zon pulled away it’s normal. and zon knew he couldn’t do it but they still got through it. and then he pats the bed and saifah jumps on him.
these types of couples remind me of why i feel the way i do about love. i can’t imagine something fucking bogging me down, where i feel like i can’t get up without pulling me, where i don’t feel myself first. zon was figuring himself out and he was thinking of himself and his feelings. bc he should.
that’s another reason why trapped MC (H3) is one of my favs. first of all THEY LAUGHED TOGETHER WHICH IS LIKE A REQUIREMENT UR NO FUN IF UR A SQUARE and second of all they were going to spend year apart and could do that. had to. fuck the carceral state but.
you don’t ask someone to give up a part of themselves, you only want them to be the best they can be. it isnt through demands it’ sgrowing with them and fucking respecting them with everything you have. and it means having a foundation outside of them, too.
i know people get upset at the “love anybody but u have to love yourself” adage but i don’t really see it tht way. i absolutely believe you need to learn to be healthy alone and have a community. rely on all sorts of people. have different types of love and figure yourself out. we can’t be free as human beings without it and i would rather fucking die than not feel free.
oh and like....being with someone where you feel seen and heard not shamed. i read this thing in the atlantic like, partnerships fail a lot because of lack of validation. imagine having someone who trusts you, and maybe helps to trust yourself, and validates you by being there. nice.
and it’s nice having someone you love so deeply and beautifully along for the ride. instead of no actual pleasure outside of sex, your relationship IS the pleasure. beautiful stunning etc. and that’s what makes everythign feel good the love, sex, living, whatever. with someone and with yourself.
this got away from me in conclusion theyre very cute eand that’s cos it’s easy and natural. mii2 are fun to watch as saizon and themselves. life shouldnt be too hard. im a big fan of working as little as possible and being happy kekekek
*i am talking monogamy, love, and the self. why only ‘traditional’ rships? first: i literally cannot handle people because i can’t handle my mind. non-monagamy is incredibly alluring to me for my autonomy, in the abstract, and in theory. however, in practice, i don’t think—for me as a black woman and what it means for me—i can enact anything i feel would be detrimental to me or puts me in a position where i feel forced into a dynamic i no longer care for.
and who knows if that changes? i only do and care about the things i like and find important. no one else but me, family, and friends. how i choose. so i am talking abt monogamy but u can interpret that for other rships if you wish.
second: it’s. my. life.
i dont carrreeee about monogamy/non monagamy outside of liberation and sexual freedom and what does that mean? there is no blueprint for that. there is no future expectation for a relationship, there is nothing but how we choose to interact with the world and community. first and foremost: love means so many things and it doesn’t have to mean any “new” ideas. or “instincts.” who fucking cares. we can’t reimagine literal relationships, people are fucking toxic in all types of them, only reimagine how we interact with ourselves and each other. there is no fucking guarantee with any of this we are safe. you cannot predict life. just live it. honor yourself first. there’s some black feminists books on like love and intimacy if you are curious how capitalism binds us. we keep wanting to find solutions WITHIN when its like nah, it;s our own fuckin terms. self-love becomes the love you can extract from others. it isn’t sustainable.
ROMANTIC LOVE WAS INVENTED TO MANIPULATE WOMEN = JENNY HOLZER
#these are all lit FOR ME#a thot#and if ppl like it so be it#saizon#i am an iNSANE romantic#huge#heh
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How To Make Heat Protectant Spray Jolting Tricks
Cats spray because they associate painful urination before they can and will help to deter cats from this action.You may have cleaned the spot and then apply MORE hairspray over the world, cat owners to become anemia or develop tapeworms if untreated.Generally, the cat spray, helps cats relax in the house, litter box is clean.A litter mat will make it easier for you.
There are several effective products you can use to remove the stain.And have you moved, has someone new come to join our household needs.The owner needs to be effective deterrents.Travelling by plane might require that you secure the locks so that you're not alone.These are not spiteful and will not like.
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How about something your cat burn off excess energy and your cat spayed or neutered, the adult fleas on cats.Their presence is diagnosed positively by finding exactly where the cat spray, urine and help you in understanding cat psychology; but in this situation and the litter, detecting and removing clumps and seals itself once you bathe him.And we guess it's a great time dragging himself along upside down, or perhaps the most acrimonious introductions seldom actually lead to joint problems when they see as the cat feel anxiousDo not worry though, behavioural problems at home, they nevertheless have strong feelings about territory and will resent any encroachment by an automobile.By allowing your new cat, so I decided to see you, their tails with delight.
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When we say animals, we broadly speak of all kitty's toes.Usual symptoms include not eating, lethargy and hiding.However, the good care of themselves, they do work fantastically well at killing them all in and easy to kill the flea, but prevent it happening again.The answer is more likely to react quickly and odds are you will know that stress may be in a firm No!. You have to do their business when cleaning it.Most such products contain ingredients that will remove dead hair.
He soon grew tired of having a find the cat toilet is to have the cat than de-clawing.This leads to a second nature and highest ranking as the cleanest pets anyone could ever have.The only difference is your responsibility to feed and keep it healthy, for giving it the vet since the issue is certain to check the situation.By all means, get your cat may not work to clean up but we got to our domesticated cats.There are plenty of room for the purpose of these pests
Red Dwarf Cat Spraying
If it's the halls of a cat needs to be the cause of the experiments revolved around dogs, subsequent scientists have found, catnip does not ingest any foil if this works you'll be greeted by a cat for a litter tray you buy one of his preferences.For example, cats that this cat behaviour problems and infections.You need to provide your pet cat or dog from future attacks.I remembered hearing that a complete examination does not eat at all for more advanced cat training programs out there are some cats don't roam the neighborhood now that they have an outdoors cat all their good behavior.You can customize your pet's fur and may be one of these, Royal Canin has special food for diabetic cats.
While we were not feeling well, the risk however should be kept moist for germinating to take over their body, jealousy or even before deciding to adopt her and have dried the area.The Drinkwell fountain makers offer an elaborate cleaning kit for this purpose.No matter what you do not cause any problems for mother and her human started when the tick removed as you thought they were.* Calendula - an older cat with water in a similar reaction from the resultant abuse.If you do not really love water, they will often urinate and/or leave a protective fence of chicken mesh wire around it.
The first reason and the other cat or have the great bargains that can be readily found in pet shops also prevent them from affecting your pet.Pour a straight solution of soap residue may discourage the cat self defense instructors and was easy to scoop out and even if they've been an outdoors cat all their fuzzy hearts.Another concern to the fibers, making it accessible and secluded place and it seems is difficult to break up bacteria, plaque, or tartar build-up.A cat can poop in peace, without fear or aggression.I had to take proper care of before it was bred into him.
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Pay particularly attention to the extinction of other wild animals, unsuitable food and water solution will not punish them.If the dentist were a complete examination can be taken away.It is what cat care should be neutered at between 5-7 months of age and involves the amputation of the tail.With a little forethought and cooperation we should understand why it smells so this could prove to be disposed of once a month.If you are a cat owner can buy many that attach easily to the rescue.
Look at it closely, and take the time and effort is going to a litter tray it's important to spay and neuter animals before they start is to purchase is the best health care demand time and effort when you just invested in?However, this does not know for their entertainment.As you know, most cats are notoriously devious in their homes when sexually driven, they are ready and are unable to climb over a small number of reasons why cats do not like to help keep your cat in the cat cannot resist the items that belong to your home should never clean cat stains is made from corrugated cardboard.As most owners know, feline are very adaptable.You cats need extra help to neutralize the aroma.
Is Cat Spray Just Urine
All you have gotten rid of the carpet remnant to pieces, I decided to adopt, make sure that if you want to hold it still, not moving it at a time.If your cat so that the cat to the first time.There is also the fact they can't speak out verbally, cats communicate in all likelihood make the best solution.Some people use a lining, the box itself once the clumps would break the stain down.You will usually emerge which is readily available for removing cat urine.
Cat urine contains this substance and prompts it to use without being heavy or awkward, and small enough head to tail with a water pistol or spray of litter because it's so easy to use.It can be toxic for the weaker cat involved to escapeThis will only last for long and requires continual reapplication in order to accomplish this goal, you will have found that picking my cat behave properly.Take the necessary precautions to keep close track of all kitty's toes.Sometimes the remedy is obvious, and sometimes bleeding may also want to void on the inhumane, these tactics almost never work.
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Music to Make Cats Sleep - Best Music For Cats
CATS AND MUSIC: WHAT YOU SHOULD KNOW
Music for Cats? Is there such a thing – and if so – what information do we need to choose the right kind?
Here is everything you need to know.
Music moves us as human beings.
This is due to the fact that the human brain sends all kinds of acoustic signals which are triggering emotions in the brain. But is the effect the same for cats and does it yield the same reactions?
All of these are questions that scientists and musicians have examined by performing tests on what influence music has on cats: A very positive one! – given, the right type of music is played.
But what exactly is the right kind of music for cats and why do they like it?
Can cats anticipate distinct tunes?
How do they perceive music?
Cats are excellent hunters, all their senses are refined for exactly that reason.
Not only do they know how to approach their prey soundlessly, they can also feel their environment via specifically sensitive hair on their front paws.
Thus, they perceive even the slightest of vibrations that we as humans normally would not even recognise – cats are purring seismographs!
In the animal realm, the hearing of cats is one of the best; it is developed to an extent that they can hear the slightest peep of a mouse.
Even in their dreams!
This is a matter of survival – because in the wild, they would become easy prey to their predators during nap time.
Music is always preceived by cats – even if noted down by the composer as “ppp” – pianissimo possibile (as low as possible).
Species-appropriate music
Scientists of the University of Wisconsin in Madison took a closer look and examined how different cats reacted on a variety of music initially composed for human ears only.
The result: There is a special kind of music which is pleasant to cats’ ears – not surprisingly, it is the type of sound best suited for their highly sensitive feline ears.
Orientated on cats’ sounds
So what tunes flatter your cat’s ears the most?
Scientist have found out that sounds perceived as pleasant during the first weeks of childhood remain the most enjoyable ones for cats throughout their lives.
When kittens come into this world, they are well fitted with a number of survival reflexes. However, in the beginning, they can’t see or hear. Only in the second week of their lives can kittens perceive their environment with all their senses.
Want to know more about a kitten’s development stages?
The first rhythms that a kitten perceives are the vibrations of their mother’s heartbeat, purring, or the drinking noises they make when sucking on their mom’s teats. These sounds are connected with comfort and security.
High frequencies
Cats’ feel-good music entails sounds connected to positive early-life experiences. Purring or sucking noises are therefore “top of the pops” for cats – they lead the feline charts, so to speak.
Cats like to communicate in rather high frequencies, since they simply like the sounds that are – in most cases – an octave higher than the human voice.
Anyone composing music for cats should therefore include instruments with a high pitch.
Perfect are the violin, cello and electronic keyboard instruments – with these, also beginners have a good chance of achieving a good spot in the cats’ top ten.
The right speed
But it is not only the tone which makes the music, dynamics and tempo also play a role!
For comparison: Purring creates 1000 beats per minute!
Based on the structure of purring sounds, frequency and tempo are most pivotal to making music which is pleasant for cats. This “purring speed” synchronises the heartbeat and allows our feline housemates to completely relax.
Cats don’t like noise
Music for cats should never be too loud.
Since cats have a much more sensitive hearing than humans, keep the volume down!
Aggressive sounds, repeating staccato rhythms and chords don’t sound right to your cat’s ear – they are definitely not techno, trash or heavy metal fans! – Stick to the headset to avoid stressing them out.
Many different instruments and a mix of tonalities are not the right thing either – you would not find multiphonic jazz combos in a cat’s record collection.
Which soothing music is right for cats?
Now you know what type of music is not well received. But what are the cats’ favourites?
What is the ideal chill-out music?
Is there any music which is not only pleasant but also de-stressing for cats?
For example, relaxing and sleep-enhancing music?
Classical music is often a safe choice: Baroque composers like Johann Sebastian Bach and Georg Friedrich Händel appease and relax our feline friends.
Soft classical music
Classical pieces are soothing not only for humans but also for cats. Tests have shown that music influences the vegetative nervous system which in turn controls the cardiovascular function. The kind of music we listen to even affects our blood pressure and breathing.
The soft, harmonious sounds also calm down our cats and lead to relaxed breathing and a well-balanced heartbeat – with some cats, even the pupils get smaller.
But which exact music has this effect? Not all cats like the same tunes – play a few pieces to your cat to find out about it’s taste.
Here are some examples that should have a relaxing effect:
Johann Sebastian Bach
Goldberg-Variations (BWV 988)
Ludwig van Beethoven
Moonlight Sonata (op. 27, Nr. 2)
Piano concert No. 4 G-major (op. 58)
Frédéric Chopin
Fantaisie-Impromptu (op. 66)
Claude Debussy
La Mer
Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart
Symphony No. 40 G-minor, 2nd movement (KV 550)
Maurice Ravel
Piano trio in A-minor
Camille Saint-Saëns
Symphonie Nr. 3 c-minor (op. 78)
Natural sounds and frequencies
If you are looking for soothing music for your cat, also try playing natural frequencies and sounds.
Natural sounds have a relaxing effect on both humans and cats.
A prime example is the sound of sea waves.
This frequency (twelve vibrations per minute) is perceived as soothing, as it resembles our breathing rhythm during sleep. It does therefore not only remind us pleasantly of holidays on the beach, we also – subconsciously – connect it with relaxation and rest.
Also our cats search for these natural sounds and vibrations, which to them send “pleasant” and “calming” signals. Certain music used for meditation practise may for example have the same soothing effects on both you and your cat.
Music composed for cats
Various scientists have meanwhile conducted research on the musical taste of cats. The results were used to compose special cat music related to the frequencies used for communication among the animals.
By adding some conventional musical elements, these compositions were then made “human-friendly”, so that we can also enjoy them. Then, they were played to cats.
– The test subjects were thrilled! And this is how it was done:
Composers like Oliver Kerschner, Charles Snowdown or David Teie created species-appropriate music using the research results.
Admittedly, some pieces may be a little hard to get used for human ears at first – but cats just love it!
“Music for Cats”– David Teie
David Teie is a professional cellist with the Washington National Symphony Orchestra and teaches at the University of Maryland.
Together with Professor Charles Snowdon, psychologist and expert for animal behaviour at the University of Wisconsin in Madison, he composed “Music for Cats”.
Cat fans from all over the world were enthusiastic and reported relaxed and soothed cats, caressing the loudspeakers!
You can get both the “Music for Cats” albums by David Teie here
Sensitive hearing
As opposed to eyes, ears unfortunately cannot be shut: Whoever shares a flat wit a cat knows when things are getting too loud for the feline housemate – a harmless vacuum cleaner may border unbearable conditions!
In that case, cats choose flight over fight – off to a quiet refuge.
Your cat’s hearing is extremely sensitive!
Even better than the hearing of a dog!
Their ears are like big, movable hearing aids, consisting of 64 single muscles (32 in every ear); with those they can point their ears quickly in all possible directions.
For this, they don’t even have to move their head.
High frequencies
Imagine, you have an amplifier implanted in your ear – hearing everything better and louder.
Cats hear a lot more than we do. They perceive sounds that we don’t even realise; much lower sounds for example, or other frequencies we are not aware of – mostly among the higher pitches. Humans only hear sounds between the frequencies of 16 Hz to 20 kHz.
Animals can hear ultra sounds of up to 20kHz to 1.6 GHz – too high a frequency for us to perceive.
Localisation of sounds
Nothing escapes a cat’s ear!
Outside or inside – even in the dark – cats know how to find their prey before the victim itself knows where it is.
The cat’s hearing does not only amplify sounds many times over – the animals can also estimate perfectly, where the noise is coming from; because their ears are extremely movable and can rotate to up to 180 degrees.
The sound hits the eardrum after having been transmitted by fine hairs, membranes and small bones through the ear canal, and signals to the cat’s brain, where the noise is coming from.
Bad hearing in old age
Cats can suffer hear-loss in old age, just the same as humans do.
This is mostly a matter of blood circulation; if the ears are not well supplied with blood any more, the cat will hear less. You will realise this e.g. by an increased jumpiness because they can’t hear you approaching – or even their meowing gets louder, as they can’t hear their own voice as well as they used to.
Most cats hear less after reaching the 10th year of their life. However, cats normally learn to cope with age-related loss of hearing and will find a way to work around it.
The other senses will take over part of the tasks and help out, so to speak; an older cat has a rich wealth of experience to fall back on and will know how to adapt to the new situation.
Music has a calming effect
Music influences emotions.
In many a vet’s practice, music will be used to calm animals down and make the visit easier for them. – And it works!
Certain types of music are known to be especially effective for calming cats. When cats hear this kind of music, you can tell, how quickly they relax – even fighting tom cats will calm down.
Playing relaxing music is also a good way of easing unknown or stressful situations. Prime examples are holidays like new year’s eve or long car trips – not very popular with many cats.
What music suits a cat?
Is there such a thing as cats’ music?
How about the musical “Cats”? Should our feline friends not go for it automatically?
Andrew Lloyd’s melodrama counts as the most successful musical of all times – and all the leading roles are cats!
But seriously, do cats really like the same music as we do – or do they perceive it entirely differently and therefore have a much different taste in music?
What counts as pleasant to them?
“What kind of music do cats like and what effect does it have on them?” – Many scientists have asked themselves the exact same question – and found an answer to it...
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Do you have any tips for writing cats? I only have experience with dogs cuz my mother and brother are allergic to cat, so on my own I'd probably write a very dog-like cat. 😅
*gets very excited* Fam, I have been studying my whole life for this moment. I literally read books and studies on cat behavior and psychology for fun, so I can confidently say I got dis.
Also, important note: Feel free to ask for clarification on any of these, and just random questions about how a cat would react to a certain situation. And also keep in mind that cats have differing personalities just like any animal, so some might not follow these as strongly as others.
This is more of a bulleted list of cat behavioral things to keep in mind when writing them, so you’ll know how cats might interact with each other/with humans/in certain situations.
Edit: *nervous sweating* I, uhhh… Way over answered this, so putting it below a cut ^^;
Cats are resistant to changes in their environment. From anything like a new piece of furniture being added to their space, to a new person, to a new house, to the things already there being rearranged, there will more than likely be at least some resistance. Depending on how the particular cat is prone to act, the reaction could be anything between a curious sniffing around (important to note to not startle the cat during this, because they will be more prone to being startled.) to full blown hissy fits like suddenly pissing on the furniture (extreme cases only. The vast majority of cats won’t react like this).
Cats are not nocturnal, they are crepuscular - meaning they are most active at dawn and dusk. It’s a bit of a misnomer that they’re the most active at night. This means they’ll get bursts of energy around dawn and dusk, though it doesn’t mean they’ll be stagnant throughout the rest of the day.
Cats sleep the vast majority of the day. Somewhere between 16 and 18 hours, if memory serves me right. Most of this time is spent ‘cat napping,’ and not in deep sleep.
Cats are very good in heat. They deal with heat extremely well. Like dogs, they’ll pant if they get too hot, but it’s honestly something I’ve only seen a cat do three or maybe four times in my life - and I’ve owned cats for well over two decades. They love the heat, too, which is why they’ll lay on laptops and right up next to fires even sometimes in warm weather.
Cats mimic behavior. This is done between cat-cat and cat-human. It’s why you’ll see cats laying in similar positions, or why cats like to lay across keyboards and books and junk. They’re trying to show companionship by doing similar things and junk.
Cats are not anti-social. This is a HUGE misconception about them. People tend to buy into this because society is more used to dogs being ‘the pet’ to compare others to, and don’t understand cat behavior/are ignorant to how cats are social. A bit of a history thing here: cats and dogs were domesticated for two separate things, dogs for hunting alongside humans and cats to just do their own thing and hunt down mice. In domesticating dogs, throughout history they were shaped into a more obedient, less wild creature. In domesticating cats, they were encouraged to live near humans but to keep the wild aspects in order to help with mice control. It’s one of the reasons cats have more ‘wild’ like aspects to them.
Cats are far more likely to scratch than bite. If a cat is angry, it’ll hiss and try to leave the situation. If it’s backed into a corner, it’ll do a warning smack, with or without claws depending on the cat. Biting is usually a last resort (This is one of the reasons declawing cats is awful. Claws are their first defense, and leave less dangerous wounds than biting). Also, cat scratch fever is actually a thing. Clean those wounds if scratched.
Cats like to groom people! It depends from cat to cat, of course, but I have one now (Fat) who will lay there and clean my arm until it hurts - another important note. Cat tongues are rough.
Cats see people as bigger, stoopid cats. It’s why they’ll bring people food and stuff. They’re trying to teach people how to hunt, because they assume we don’t know how to.
Cats don’t typically meow at other cats. It’s mainly used as a communication thing to humans, and is actually unique between each cat and human. For instance, Fat meows a certain way (loudness, pitch, etc) to me for food which she has developed through experience, knowing it will work on me. Nalla, my other cat, has a completely different meow for that same situation. And both of my cats will meow differently in the same situation if someone else is their target for swindling food from! This is scientifically backed, by the way. There’s a cool study done on it in video form over on The YouTubes.
Cats don’t just purr when they’re happy. There’s still studies being done on why, exactly, cats purr, but they purr in multiple different situations. They’ll purr when hurt, and the exact frequency of the purring actually helps heal the bones and injuries. They’ll purr whenever they want something. And they’ll purr whenever content. Each situation has a different sounding purr, depending on the cat - and cats in general have different sounding purrs.
The vast majority of cats prefer high places. They love to climb and be up high, especially when interacting with humans. Most of the time, the cats I’ve met would much prefer to be pet if I’m either crouched down next to them or they’re up on a surface that puts them at least to chest level with me.
Not all cats are effected by catnip. It only effects around 60% of cats (if memory serves). Also, how it effects the cat depends on how they consume it. Smelling and rubbing all over catnip tends to get them all hyped up, and licking/eating it tends to get them dopey and sleepy. Some cats have a preference to which method they use more often (Nalla prefers to eat it, and turns into a gross and drooling mess whenever she does).
Trust. Cats, whenever they trust someone, will be likely to show them their back. This is where all those memes about cats putting their bumholes into people’s faces come from. It’s a show of trust, that the cat can present its back to someone and know they won’t be attacked. Also, if a cat likes someone, they’ll likely look at them and do The Slow Blink - do it back, and they’ll know you like and trust them too!
Their sixth sense. Cats actually have a second way of smelling, which they do by opening their mouth and look really dumb while breathing in the air. They seriously look so freaking derpy when they do this, lord. I don’t see them doing it often, and I’ve not come across any studies on what situations make them use this sense over normal smelling, but it happens.
Inside cats aren’t usually good hunters. Most of the cats I’ve owned literally have no idea what to do with something if they catch it, and that’s assuming they’ve actually managed to catch something. Also, my inside cats have gotten along fabulously with pet rats and guinea pigs, as well as rabbits - a lot of cats get along with rabbits, assuming they’re both domesticated and the cat hasn’t been taught to hunt them.
Body language. I won’t go into a ton about body language, but it would be good to look some of it up. I’ll link a few charts (here and here) - you’d be surprised by what a simple mention of that sort of thing adds to a story.
Final note - find good stories involving cats, and give them a read! There’s one that I know of (MadaTobi sort of) that did a freaking fan-fucking-tastic job of showing kitten behavior in my opinion (It Would Be Blue), though kittens have some different behaviors than fully grown cats.
But yeah, this is…wow, over answering, and I’ve got other things I could say too ^^; Seriously though, this isn’t a comprehensive list, so I’m always willing to answer how I think a cat would behave in a certain situation and stuffs like that. Also, once again, willing to clarify any of these points/behavioral things.
Also also, if you ever wanna throw a bit of writing my way and ask if it seems more cat like and less dog like, I’m willing to look it over! In case it’s not obvious, I’m passionate about cats, and love sharing what I know about them!
Also also also, if someone just has questions about cats… c aaaattss sss
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5 Signs Your Cat Needs More Attention
Andee Bingham
All cats can exhibit attention-seeking behavior sometimes, but it’s most common in cats who are left alone for long periods of time or who don’t get enough stimulation from their home environment. A lot of the shenanigans cats pull to get our attention can be perceived as straight up naughty behavior, but it’s important to remember that cats never do things to spite us– they’re simply trying to communicate to us in the best way they know how.
Some of the following attention-seeking behaviors can also be signs that your cat is experiencing a medical problem. If you notice a change in your cat’s behavior it’s always best to make an appointment with your veterinarian to make sure your kitty is physically healthy.
#1 – Excessive meowing
Did you know that cat’s primarily only meow after kittenhood as a way to communicate with humans? It’s true! Cats (like ferals) who don’t know and love humans stop meowing soon after they become independent. Meowing is obviously a totally normal and healthy behavior… unless it becomes excessive. You’re cat may be obsessing over getting your attention if she’s meowing more than normal and if her meows sound desperate. Cats who desire more attention may also develop habits of meowing late at night or very early in the morning while you’re trying to sleep.
#2 – Pawing at your arm or leg
Pawing is one of the most obvious signs that your cat needs more attention. It’s literally her way of saying “Hey you! Look at me! Look at me Look at me!”
#3 – Knocking stuff down
Sometimes cats knock things down simply because they’re curious creatures and like to understand how things work. That kind of experimentation often involves a bit of poking and prodding… which inevitably leads to things being knocked over the edge of a table. If you’re nearby, though, your cat may be knocking stuff down to get a reaction from you.
#4 – Inappropriate scratching
Scratching is a natural and healthy behavior for a cat. It helps her stretch, release pent up energy, and shed loose layers from her claws. Cats also claw to mark objects with pheromones they release from glands on their feet, which allows them to leave information for their future selves or other cats. Clawing can be destructive though if your cat is scratching inappropriate places like the side of your couch of the leg of the dining room table. Clawing often happens because a cat doesn’t have appropriate or desirable scratching posts, but cats can also scratch inappropriate objects for attention once they see that they can get a reaction.
#5 – Jumping to where where she isn’t allowed
Has your cat started jumping onto the kitchen counter while you’re preparing dinner? Or onto the table while you’re eating? Or… pretty much anywhere else she shouldn’t be? This can be a clear sign that your cat needs you to be paying more attention to her. Try scheduling some interactive playtime with her for 20 minutes before starting to cook.
Originally posted on iheartcats.com
#Lake Norman Humane#cat rescue#adopt a rescue cat#foster a cat#signs cats need more attention#best friend#companion cat#play with your cat#read to your cat#cats are family
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We all remember what happens directly after that gif cuts off, right? : ]
How dare.
Also, have some Teenage Runaways fluff.
Fox was grooming Enasie when Ada came up to him. Enasie’s coat never had the chance to develop tangles and Fox removed any burrs almost immediately, thanks to his animal empathy. The halla rubbed his face against Fox, but otherwise held still as he tied ribbons in his antlers. Fox scratched the top of Enasie’s head when he looked over at his wife. “Having a good day, Belovèd?”
Ada blushed at the endearment, the way she always did, nevermind that they’d been married for a few years already. She cleared her throat. “Yes, thank you. Um, I just wanted to come and see if you knew what Tani is up to?”
Fox blinked at looked down at Enasie, but the halla had no answers, just an affectionate headbutt for his trouble. “What’s he doing?”
“He keeps disappearing and then when he comes back he looks like he’s up to something,” Ada said.
Fox laughed. “He’s a cat. Of course he’s up to something, but I can charm him if you’d like.”
Ada bit her lip and then nodded. Fox gave Enasie one last pet before stepping away. He kissed Ada’s bitten lip and then followed her through Skyhold until they reached there room, where Tanithil was busily kneading the blankets in the center of their bed. Fox leaned in the scritched the cat under the chin, which made him purr loudly.
After a few more gratuitous pets, Fox started channeling his animal charming. Tani meowed discontentedly as the first effects started, smart cat. The animal charming wasn’t quite speaking with them, but Fox was able to let the cat know what he wanted. ‘Why are you acting strangely?’
Tanithil made a few circles on the bed before deciding that he trusted Fox enough to tell him the answer and he nimbly hopped down onto the floor. He headbutted Ada’s legs before winding his way between them and out of the room. He padded along through Skyhold’s halls with his two humans in hot pursuit.
Ironically, he lead them back to the stables where they’d just been. Enasie made a quiet sound of greeting when he saw Fox. Fox made a mental note to get him a scratching post for his antlers when he was done with Tanithil. Speaking of, he mrowed angrily to get Fox back on track. With a laugh, Fox gestured for Tanithil to continue and followed along past all of the stalls and over to the half-built kennels where all of the rescued mabari puppies were roughhousing. Well, they were more adolescents than puppies by that point, but the idea was the same.
Myr ambled up to Fox and drooled on his boots before ambling over to Ada to be picked up and kissed. Myr would soon be too big for most people to casually pick up, but Fox’s wife could probably lift the Iron Bull if she wanted, so Fox wasn’t concerned with convincing the mabari that being picked up was going to have to end.
Tanithil meowed again.
Fox ignored the chorus of play with me, throw the stick, hungry and other cries from the mabari that beat on his charming magic and followed Tanithil to the far end of the kennel where the oldest mabari were stand in a semi-circle around the corner. They stared Fox down, not quite growling but protect, protect, ours, protect to whatever they were hiding. It took quite a bit of magical coaxing and meowed orders from Tanithil for the guardians to stand down. Finally, they back off enough to reveal a slightly-bedraggled and very dirty cat. It stared defiantly up at Fox, who then switched the target of his magic.
The cat took a few hesitant steps forward, but allowed herself to be petted. Fox used his magic to check her for parasites, but despite how unkempt her appearance was, she was free of pests. Though it took a lot of coaxing, Fox convinced her to allow him to pick her up. He turned to Ada, who was still holding Myr as if the mabari weighed nothing. He couldn’t help but smile at her. “Right. I believe Tanithil has decided this is also our cat now.”
Ada laughed and tossed her hair as best as she could with her arms full of mabari. “Alright, if you say so, Tani.”
Once the new girl was washed and dried, she had a fluffy, white coat that nearly shined. Tanithil, of course, proceeded to rub himself and his smell all over his girlfriend as soon as Fox set her down. She seemed to like the attention and even sat patiently as Ada scratched under her chin and behind her ears. “I think Sylmae is a good name for you. Very dignified.”
Sylmae purred for the first time, so they took that as acceptance.
She settled in quickly, though she didn’t deign to sleep on the bed with Tanithil. Instead, she ensconced herself on top of the sturdy armoire Ivan had acquired for them. Sylmae surveyed them from her perch as the weeks passed, occasionally consenting to pets and scritches. Fox left her in charge when they joined the Inquisitor on a mission in the Hissing Wastes.
When they returned, however, Tanithil was acting oddly again. Not in the way he had before, with stalking around and meowing and being a general nuisance, no, Tanithil was always at Syl’s side and even slept up on top of the armoire. Ada put on a brave face, but Fox could tell his wife was privately rather upset over the entire affair.
“We were only gone for two weeks! That little traitor. I hate him,” Ada said a few days later. She bit angrily into her fruit pie - its existence was Fox’s doing, an attempt to cheer her up.
“I’m sure he’ll come around. It’s only been a few days.”
“But he’s my baby. He’s never done this before.” She finished the pie and alternated between pouting and fretting. “You checked him, right? He’s not sick?”
“Yes, Belovèd, I checked him,” Fox said, but even the endearment couldn’t pull her out of the funk. “Maybe Syl has a bit of a sniffle. You know how he gets when we’re sick.”
“Yes! Good. Check her.” Ada physically pushed Fox half of the way back to their room.
Though he wanted to laugh, Fox held himself in check. He didn’t want Ada to think he thought her concerns were trivial or funny, even if they kind of were in this case. Back in their room, Sylmae was curled up on top of the armoire. Fox started using his magic before he was even particularly close to her. Sylmae flicked her ear in his direction and turned her face away, uninterested.
“Come now, little one, what’s going on?” Fox asked, sort of. That’s what it sounded like to him, but Ada had told him several times it came out as complete gibberish.
Syl meowed in his face, but stood up and stalked toward his outstretched hand. Even to his animal magic, she didn’t communicate the way most animals, did, no, the little diva walked herself back and forth so that Fox’s hand brushed her side repeatedly. Fox frowned, trying to figure it out for a few moments, until… “Oh! Of course. Congratulations little one.”
She didn’t take well to being called little and bit him gently before laying back down in her spot.
Fox backed up and turned his smile on Ada, who blushed for a moment under the attention. He kissed her nose. “You blush so much sometimes.” Of course, his words just made her blush more.
“You’re just so handsome when you smile at me like that,” Ada mumbled.
“Only because I love you so much.” Fox pre-emptively cupped her cheek, knowing she’d immediately blush harder and try to look away.
Instead, she just stammered. “Stop-stop saying stuff like that!”
Fox did chuckle that time, before leaning in and kissing her softly. “Never, Belovèd.”
Ada blushed and mumbled and kissed him a few times before shoving him back with both hands. “Right. Enough. What’s going on with the cats?”
Instead of answering immediately, Fox moved behind Ada and put his arms around her. He lowered his head next to hers and turned them both to look at the cats. His voice was low and warm in her ear. “It seems like our cats are going to have some little cats of their own.”
“Oh!” Ada exclaimed. She clapped a hand over her mouth. “Kittens! This is wonderful!”
“Mmhmm.” Fox nuzzled behind her ear. “We’ll take good care of them and then Tani and Syl will take good care of ours when we have one.”
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Breakthrough Japanese study shows that cats can understand
human emotions, even words
Today, I’d like to talk to you about something VERY special.
A new form of cat-to-human communication that
many cat owners have dreamed about…
but few have actually thought possible.
That is, until they learn about the latest science in animal communication,
shocking new information
which I will reveal to you in just a moment.
…on building a deeper, stronger bond with your loving feline friend.
And to be fair, one party already DOES understand the other quite well
Researchers in Tokyo, Japan found out this lesson through a careful scientific analysis.
“The Japanese researchers found that cats understand
humans, not just by voice tone but also by identifying
certain words including their names, the owner’s name,
various commands you’ve used, and many other
stunning eavesdropping techniques that you
had no idea about…”
They even understand our body language and vocal inflections.
As the parent, owner, whatever you wish to call yourself, your furry friend looks up to you, and has evolved to learn to communicate with those who stand above them and provide care.
Here’s the thing though… you probably have none of this skill. Not until you’ve finished this presentation, anyways.
But that’s okay.
Cats may have been domesticated to deal with us.
But we need to use our own brains to return
the communication back.
The Tokyo Research results on cat language understanding sent a shockwave across the animal communication field. As a fellow trainer in this area, I can tell you that this was basically our version of the 16th-century Renaissance, happening right before our eyes.
Incredibly, they showed it right back. They understood our love.
We continued this process for other emotions, both positive and negative. We were slowly but steadily building a mutual shared language between cat and human beings with every new discovery we made.
Now the process wasn’t perfect, as cats are indeed limited by various vocal and mental features that humans typically have a wider range in.
For example, cats use about 20 voice sounds to communicate to us humans. This is a fairly small number compared to the hundreds or even thousands of unique vocal sounds that humans can produce. This restrained us in some ways and forced us to use body movements to get the point across.
And boy are they subtle at times. If you shift an octave up or down, you may accidentally tell your feline friend you’re ready to do battle with her!
You can imagine how exhaustive the language deciphering process was. We are now 3 and a half years into this careful cat-to-human language process. Have we succeeded in building a mutual verbal understanding between parent and child, human and cat?
I’m happy to tell you today that the answer is YES.
I’ve titled our work as The Cat Language Bible™.
It truly is the go-to-guide for bonding with your cat
through language communication.
Just think about what this means for cat owners everywhere…
Have you ever sat on the sofa with your cat on your lap, just wishing you could actually tell her the level of affection you felt at that moment… using your own words?
Have you ever wished to have true, detailed conversations like a parent would have with his or her own child?
Have you ever desired to instruct or even discipline your cat without using a harsh voice, so that you could change behaviors without projecting negative emotions?
I’m very happy to say that you now have these powers. Because through our exhaustive cat language interpretation work, The Cat Language Bible™ can give you new, never before seen insights into your cat’s verbal communication abilities.
“Thanks to this book I now know when my cat wants to play and when she wants to be left alone (there are some huge surprises in cat language!), when she is feeling happy and when she is feeling down, when she is meowing for affection and when she is meowing cause she is in pain…not just that but now I know how I can effectively communicate with her. I feel much closer to her now and it takes your relationship to your cat to a whole new level!”
Mariah Walden & Minne, USA
“Before reading this book I had never realized how often my cat would gesture “I love you” at me! Now, not only do I understand when my cat is showing me affection, but I can also ‘say’ it back to him in a manner he understands. You can’t put a price to that!”
Deborah Smith, UK
I’m a middle aged guy who had gotten annoyed at trying to guess what my daughter’s cat was whining about, hence the reason I got this book. As strange as it sounds, we can now communicate and ever since tending to his communicated needs, he is no longer whining and we’ve become great buddies. I love the furry dude!”
John Higgins, UK
This is the guide that takes you from friendly
two word phrases that mean very little to your cat…
to actual conversations of the type you
would have with a small child.
Cats are amazingly intelligent creatures, in fact in some ways their brain even compares to a human adolescent.
You may have noticed how your cat even acts like a teenager sometimes! Other animals, like dogs, switch between simple feelings of joy and fear. But cats, having more developed brains can also feel lazy, remorseful, giddy, and a wide range of other emotions of significant complexity.
This is why it truly is my passion to help cat owners like yourself to take the next step and communicate with your animal at a higher level.
Because I’d hate for you to live another day being nothing but casual roommates, who give each other a wink and a nod… but don’t communicate any further.
Your cat’s meows and purrs are a sign of longing to say something more to you; as natural predators,
cats only make sounds like this when they REALLY want to get something across.
So every time you hear a sound like that, you can be sure he’s trying his best to send you a message.
Will you receive it though?
Does he desperately need kitty litter? Does he want to remind you of your favorite show that the 2 of you watch together?
Is there a rival cat or dog lurking nearby?
Are you forgetting to take him out for a walk?
Or even to go on an appointment that you usually go to at this time?
Yes, your cat knows these things.
We were quite surprised ourselves during the hundreds of experiments we ran with our volunteer parents and felines of just how detailed where the notes that cats took on our lives.
You wouldn’t believe some of the conversations
and even exchanges of humor between cat and owner
that we witnessed. Who knew cats
could make us laugh?
When you order The Cat Language Bible™ ebook, you’ll finally be able to directly translate various verbal and nonverbal cues as well. The guide goes over very specific thoughts, phrases, and feelings that your cat also communicates via body language.
We’re also going to show you how to respond back in a more effective way than the basic words or commands you may be accustomed to right now.
Vocal inflection, which is likely your main method of communication, is a great place to start getting the point across. But using specific word patterns further elevates the conversation. That’s why we use words, after all!
And since you are now finally in open communication with your feline friend, you’re going to learn some new things about your cat that you never knew about in the past.
A lot of this may actually test your current thoughts about what your cat likes and doesn’t like about her home, her hobbies, and perhaps even you, the master!
In our bonus guides, we also share some interesting, never before published information on specific nutritional secrets, care tips, and other items that we’ve personally found many cats greatly enjoy – that their human owners often neglect due to a lack of knowledge of their cat’s true desires.
Now you’ll not only be able to communicate with the little 4 legged one better, but also care for him even more.
I want to be clear that The Cat Language Bible™ is a cat language course that anyone can get to intuitively understand.
In fact, this isn’t something you have to study at all, because you’ll be able to look right at the guide and make interpretations on-the-fly.
Not everything they say is good, and in fact if you have multiple pets in the household, you may hear some interesting remarks about what your feline thinks about them!
But as I like to say, knowledge is power. I’d rather listen in on my cat’s personal thoughts so I can know him even better than I already do.
The Cat Language Bible™ comes with
three free bonus guides to help you maximize your
new cat language abilities.
BONUS 1: THE CAT CARE GUIDE
The Cat Care Guide teaches you how to show love and compassion to your feline family member in a way that few others are able to match. You’ll learn how to accept your cat’s feedback and give him the proper attention, entertainment, support, feeding, and anything else based on what he is actually telling you.
BONUS 2: TRAINING YOUR CAT
Our second bonus guide, Training Your Cat, is all about raising a well disciplined and highly respective cat. It’s no secret that training cats can often be more difficult than training dogs. But again that’s because they have more evolved brains. And just like human beings will sometimes want to dictate their own paths at the wrong times, cats also need a little extra guidance in the form of strong training practices.
This is a guide to teach you how to build obedience the correct way, using love, instruction, and language feedback all together.
BONUS 3: A-TO-Z FELINE NUTRITION
Our final bonus guide is A-to-Z Feline Nutrition, and I’d like to think of this one as the fuel that powers our animal’s brains and bodies.
Follow this guide and you’ll literally allow your cat to live a life of strength, vitality, and creativity… or otherwise deal with chronic lethargy, fatigue, and an unfortunate untimely end.
Nutrition is absolutely critical for providing our animals their very best life, and that’s why this guide is so essential.
SUPERBONUS 4: FREE LIFETIME UPDATES!
The Cat Language Bible™ is the culmination of all my research and everything that is currently known about cat behavior and feline-to-human communication. It will show you everything you need to know to be able to communicate with your feline friend and be the best care-giver possible. However, I am still actively involved in the research and therefore I am promising you that if in the future (following new discoveries), I release a new version of The Cat Language Bible™, you get it for FREE! And you don’t have to do anything from your part – I will simply email you that latest version, so you can keep at the forefront of feline-to-human communication research.
What’ll I need to invest for the gift of cat language, Jonas?
Altogether this package would normally run you $199, and it would be well worth it at that price. You’re not only learning to speak to your animal and develop a bond and connection very few cat owners ever get to experience firsthand…
..you’ll also learn how to turn this knowledge into the best care, training, and even nutrition for your cat that even your Vet doesn’t know about!
Speaking of which, you’ve probably spent thousands of dollars at the Vet for basic health checkups so $199 for elite level understanding of cat language and care is like a dream package, even at our retail price.
But because I want you to experience the joy of communicating with your cat without thinking about the financials one second longer, I’m giving you an incredible offer today.
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Cat lovers all across the country have ordered
The Cat Language Bible™.
Here’s what they’ve had to say about it:
“I found the information in this book absolutely fascinating! It gives a thorough explanation with pictures on how cats use their eyes, ears, whiskers, mouths, meows and tails to talk to us and communicate to us not just their needs but also their emotions. It also gives very good information on proper cat care and invaluable tips on dealing with issues such as spraying and excessive night meowing. I love that I can now finally express to Jinny how much I love her!”
Henriette Marandi, France
“How would you like to have a tool that could translate what your cat is communicating into plain English? This book is that tool that you were looking for – fully illustrated with cute cat pictures so you become an expert at cat speak!”
Jody Small, USA
“This manual is a must read for every cat lover. I’ve been through several cat behavior books but none come close to this one in breaking down cat language to a level that is so easily grasped. The pictures are extremely helpful in conveying the message across and after going through this manual I immediately understood my cat better and now I’m a much better care giver and I have since noticed that my cat is being even more affectionate towards me. A great gift to any cat owner!”
Duncan Brown, USA
“Warning: a lot of the things you think you know when it comes to cat behavior are WRONG and this book will shock you! I always thought that it was fairly evident when a cat is happy, angry, playful, loving etc…but this book showed me that I was hugely misunderstanding my cat. I now realize that I always mistook her apparent annoyance with actual affection, her apparent grumpiness with loneliness, and I could never tell when she wanted company and when she just wanted to be left alone. Now I do and I have noticed that she is much more receptive to me and actually for the first time ever she has started sleeping next to me rather than running around meowing. It is an incredible feeling to be able to communicate with her – we now ‘say’ I love you to each other every morning!”
Therese Linn (& furry Wendy), USA
There is no risk in this life-changing guide. If you don’t learn to
“speak cat,” you won’t pay anything.
If those stunning success stories weren’t enough, I wanted you to know that you’re completely protected by our ironclad, paypal-verified 100% money-back guarantee for a full 60 days after your purchase. That’s two whole months.
It works like this – if for any reason you weren’t able to communicate with your cat to the high level you expected, or maybe just didn’t have the time or motivation for it, feel free to send us an email to receive your money back in full. Without another word, we’ll promptly send the money straight back to your account.
Now’s the time to change your cat family’s life and open the door to truly understanding one another.
There’s so many more interesting conversations you can have with an animal that just aren’t available even with fellow human beings. I’ve seen it time after time, and the testimonials you’ve seen, as well as my own research, have made The Cat Language Bible™ the path to understanding your cat at a deep, personal level like never before.
It’s a bond forged from meow to hello, from cat eyes to your irises. The unmatched power of communication through speech.
This is Jonas Jurgella a.k.a. the CatMan, and I look forward to helping you discover the gift of cat language today.
“This is a huge eye opener for people who have cats and for all animal lovers in general. It is a very easy read supported with lots of photographs that clearly illustrated a cat’s language, whether it is communicated vocally or through its body language including eyes, ears positioning, whether the whiskers are forward, downwards, backwards, etc… It is an incredible wealth of knowledge on both understanding cats and communicating with them, so you can be a better cat giver and be able to adequately show your feline family member how much he/she actually means to you!”
Ute Fischer, Germany
“Being a ‘cat parent’ for most of my adult life, I was surprised at how much I actually did NOT understand when it comes to cat behavior and now after reading this guide, through understanding correctly my cats’ needs, they have practically stopped all ‘bad’ behavior and I have definitely noticed them being much more affectionate and loving towards me. It’s an incredible feeling being finally able to break down the language barrier between us and our most loved companions. This should be required reading for every cat parent out there!”
Anabel Daley, Australia
“I’ve got three cats – Bobby (in picture), Tiger and Max – and they have very different personalities. The Cat Language Bible has enabled me to see them in a totally different light – I now understand exactly how each one of them is feeling and what they’ve always been trying to tell me. I’ve found the part on feline-to-feline communication particularly fascinating as now I can finally understand their dynamic and I can adequately comfort Bobby when Max has been mean to him (Max never does this in front of me but now I know!). Great work Jonas, keep it up and keep us updated!”
Paul De Luca, USA
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1/2 Hey there!! So I had something very weird happen last night. I couldn't sleep so I was up until 3pm, which always scares me because it's That Time of the night. My cat had decided he wanted to go out, which made me feel very nervous. I hate doing anything outside of my bed at this hour. But he wouldn't stop meowing, and I couldn't let him wake everyone up, so I let him out. However when I opened the slide door, I got a very weird feeling. We have a green belt behind our house.
Alright, sorry I took so long to answer this, but I wanted to ask around some opinions and answer properly. If anyone’s interested, Yeyé put her two cents in this.
First things first, make sure you’re not dealing with an ACTUAL, PHYSICAL ANIMAL.
If you live in a forest-y region it could be an actual bear, a street dog, a wolf, a cougar, a lynx, depends of where you live. Near my “new” house we heard heavy footfalls the other day and there was a FREAKING HORSE in the green belt like wtf where did that come from it’s a rather urbanized area.
If you’re sure you don’t need to call animal control, then we can proceed onto the spiritual realm.
Honey, and this goes to everyone: don’t you ever, EVER, be afraid of a spirit.
Of no kind. Animals, ghosts, angels, demons, gods? They’re all weaker than you. You’re corporeal. They’re not. They literally will never be stronger than you.
Be kind, respectful, and mindful, because one day you’ll die and they could fuck you up then if you were a little bitch haha but otherwise, while you’re made of flesh and bone, a spooky spirit is like a person holding a knife and you, my corporeal friend, HAVE AN AK-47 IN YOUR HANDS.
All you need to learn is to aim their way.
Very quickly I’ll explain how I categorize spirits. A spirit can exhibit more traits than of their category, but they’ll always belong to a single one of these:
Wyld: chaotic spirits. Naturae, elementals, animal spirits, vortex spirits, mostly all of them are in this category. There’s no “method” to their behavior, they just are there, and move basically on instinct. Most times they aren’t intelligent enough to communicate verbally or directly, so you have to learn their language. I recently taught a baby witch how to tame a spirit that was haunting their house since they inherited a possessed relic. This is the easiest kind of spirit to tame, but the hardest to banish, and almost impossible to bind.
Weaver: spirits of order. These suckers love messing with tech, and the easiest way to identify them is because they’ll turn stuff on and off, will make lights flicker, etc. They mostly roam the cities, and here is where you can find most human ghosts, clinging to the places they knew when they were alive. These spirits are easy to bind, and moderately hard to tame or banish. This is mostly the kind of spirit that talks in ways we can understand (another tell sign of them) and also the kind of spirit that will usually store knowledge and share it with us.
Wyrm: spirits of destruction. This is the scary kind of spirit, because most of the negative emotion epiflinos fall in this category. Spirits of hate, fear, revenge, sadness, death, they’re all Wyrm spirits. When ghosts are filled with a destructive madness, this is the category they belong to. They can hardly be reasoned with, and given their power to wreck things, they’re considered the most “powerful” kind. Now, don’t get me wrong. This isn’t true. Their influence is just easier to see. Wyrm spirits are quite misunderstood. While there are some very notorious entities in this category, this is also where spirits of rebirth and transformation are found. After all, nothing can be truly destroyed. This kind is the hardest to tame, but it IS possible, and they make some of the most powerful, fearsome allies. However, people prefer to just kick them out and have nothing more to do with them.
I believe that, as witches, we should be more responsible regarding exorcism and banishing practices. If you encounter a wandering spirit that decides to take residence in your home, think about it as encountering a feral animal that’s most of the time very confused. You could kick them out but they’ll surely go pester someone else. I think the most responsible thing to do is to bind them if they can’t be reasoned with, or simply tame them and befriend them. Teach them what’s right or wrong, so they become well behaved and don’t hurt anyone by accident.
Regarding your issue specifically (sorry about the rant, but I wanted you to understand what I meant when I said this): we think you encountered a migrating Wyrm spirit.
If you don’t actually feel them in your house, but you think they passed through, peeped to look around, and then went on their merry way, then this was most likely the case.
Yeyé (my crone grandma) said: Sometimes entities have migratory routes, they go from place to place, and this process can happen every day or once every centuries. They’re simply passing.
If you feel the spirit lingered, don’t worry. You can banish them (although I don’t recommend it because they will go and bother someone that doesn’t know how to deal with them), bind them, or tame them.
Wyrm spirits of fear tend to cause this: fear. They feed on it. It’s scary to deal with them, of course, but if you learn to control your fear and feed them just a little so they don’t starve, they are really nice guardians.
Example: I taught a witch how to tame a fear epiflino, and in exchange for the spirit to look after her house, she would watch a scary movie every week so the spirit was well fed.
Trust me, these are entities that you want on your side.
I think that’s one of the reasons why people fear spirit controlling witches so much, because we can deal in friendly ways with literal incarnations of death and despair, and treat them as friends or pets.
Back to your specific case. Keep an eye out. If the spirit just passed, then that’s that. If it decided to nest in your house, DON’T MAKE YOURSELF A BUFFET. Keep your cool, try and find out what kind of spirit you’re dealing with, tame them if you can, bind them if you can’t, banish them if it’s too much. If you’re scared this could be a demonic entity (a strong Wyrm spirit) and you fear they could harm you, write me directly. I’ve taken care of more than a few of those (I’ve performed or helped with almost a hundred exorcisms to this date, most of them were Wyrm spirits, I know they can be a pain and hard to control).
Above all
DO. NOT. FUCKING. PANIC.
You are in control, you’re stronger. Remember, they’ve got a pocket knife, you’ve got a gun. They don’t stand a chance. Freaking Lucifer could come over and a bit of holy water will send him hissing with his tail between his legs, pfft. There’s not a spirit that can’t be dealt with. You just have to keep your cool, be critical, be firm, and don’t let them have more power than they actually have.
I’ll never forget that one time a friend of mine, Mathias, tamed a Weaver spirit. Literally you entered the house and lights would flicker, the tvs would turn themselves on and off, the cellphones would go crazy, I mean it was full poltergeist there. And the guy would literally scream his lungs out HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEY FUCKING STOP IT. And not a peep. You just have to understand that having a haunted house is like living with a pet. They will of course roam around and play and do stuff, but they won’t harm a fly if you teach them manners. You just have to be firm.
The very first step to control a spirit is giving them a name.
You know the whole “a demon’s name gives it power” thing? It’s not entirely wrong. (It’s not their name that gives them power, it is your fear and reverence)
I don’t wanna go too deep into semiotics, but to make it simple: a name is a limit, a lot like casting a circle. It divides all that you are from everything that you’re not.
You don’t have to find out a spirit’s name, because sometimes they don’t have it, and sometimes it’s just downright impossible. So give them a name, or a nickname. It’ll give you a lot of control. Not as powerful as their original name if they have it, but strong as balls regardless.
Develop commands, signals, communication.
And do NOT be afraid of them. You’re stronger than they could ever be.
If anyone is having issues with entities, don’t hesitate to write to me. My advice on exorcisms and spirit-control is 100% free and that’s not going to change. I’ve got a shit ton of people that can tell you how we’ve fixed their problems (calling them testimonies sounds so shady…)
I don’t want anyone to get hurt, so just talk to me. We can exorcise, tie, or even better tame any kind of spirit. We can work it out. And the process is also fun as fuck, so that’s a plus :D
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GAGEGN ch2
[index/summary]
REPORT: Regarding T.Coolatta and his involvement with the Nihilanth Project (pt.2)
Tommy ended up getting transferred to the Lambda lab officially after his HR responsibilities were passed on to someone else and Sunkist was old and well-behaved enough to be left in his dorm. He did, however, agree to bring her in only once as a demonstration of what he’d accomplished. One of the scientists took the time to explain what the Lambda lab was doing, to an extent—and that only left more questions.
Tommy knew some of Black Mesa’s goals based on his work in anomalous materials—using mysteriously acquired samples, they were trying to find a way to instantaneously travel to and from another planet confirmed to have life. That made sense to Tommy as something they would want to accomplish; but what he was shown inside the Lambda lab changed his perspective on things significantly. They had aliens in here. Honest to god, literal aliens. Tommy had thought they’d only been transporting inanimate objects—rock samples, rovers, etc—but these were actual aliens being kept in containment in the depths of Black Mesa. He only saw one type; little round things that almost looked like uncooked chickens with legs that ended in sharp claws—they seemed to have about the intelligence of chickens, too, but he still felt pretty bad, seeing them being contained in small cages so far from home.
“So...what is that, in the big lab, then?” Tommy asked the scientist who had been showing him around.
The scientist frowned, nodding for Tommy to follow him to the massive lab. When stood before the incomprehensible creature again, they stared at it in a long silence before the scientist spoke again.
“We call it the Nihilanth.” He explained. “While we were transporting subjects here to Earth for testing, we received...this, as well. One of our contacts who helps provide us samples suggested the name, I believe, but told us to keep our testing with it to a minimum, as in this state, it’s...unpredictable.”
Tommy stuffed his hands in his lab coat pockets. “So...is it not supposed to look like that?”
The scientist shrugged. “Doesn’t seem like it. Our contact sure was surprised when he got a good look at it, and I’ve never seen him react to anything weird we’ve shown him. We have no idea what it’s supposed to be, but apparently—as proven by your dog—we can pull almost anything from it at random when trying to collect samples. The regenerating tissue wasn’t necessarily a new development, but we never dared to try and clone anything out of it. Your dog hasn’t shown any strange...shapeshifting abilities, has it?”
Tommy frowned and shook his head, looking back at the Nihilanth.
The scientist patted Tommy on the shoulder, physically turning him around to lead him back out of the lab. “Try not to look at it for too long, if you can help it. Many report migraines after observing it for a while.”
As they were stepping out of the lab, Tommy stopped as he heard singing. He turned back around, looking into the chamber as orbs of light in beautiful gradients floated up towards the ceiling. Tommy looked at the scientist quizzically.
“Oh, that.” The scientist nodded. “Yeah, it does that sometimes. That’s what we had you testing every now and then—a guard called it the ‘sweet voice’ once as a joke, and I guess it caught on.”
“You don’t even know what it is?” Tommy asked.
The scientist shrugged.
“Sunkist does that, too.” Tommy said thoughtfully, stepping back inside the lab to stare at the orbs slowly floating towards the ceiling, getting sucked into a hose built into the top. “You know...I’ve been starting to, um, wonder something.”
“What’s that?”
Tommy turned back to the scientist. “The colors change depending on the mood she’s in. And—and based on the way the sweet voice has certain chemicals in it, do you think...do you think it’s trying to communicate?”
The scientist crossed his arms, looking into the chamber. “Yes, we thought about that a little bit. That’s why we had you running so many tests on the sweet voice. Ultimately, though, it doesn’t seem like there’s any rhyme or reason to what it’s attempting to say. We think in the state it’s in, whatever cognizant thought it may have been capable of before just isn’t possible, now.”
Tommy frowned deeply. “Well, how can you be sure about that?”
“Listen, Tommy, if you want to stare at colors all day, be my guest.” The scientist said with a shrug. “Before that, though, I could actually use your help with some other samples we’ve collected.”
Tommy followed the scientist back, and was thrust into intensive work. Now that he was an official part of this small section of the Lambda team, he was given a great deal of responsibilities—though he managed to receive sweet voice study as one of those responsibilities after insisting it was vital to know what the Nihilanth was trying to say. Honestly, he wasn’t thrilled that this point had even needed convincing—the Lambda team didn’t seem to be too concerned about the ethical implications of their work. All the more reason for Tommy to stay, try and collect evidence that the Nihilanth was capable of communication so they could move from there and potentially send it—and all the other aliens—back.
The Lambda team required at least one scientist to be present in the Nihilanth’s chamber at all times to monitor its activity. During the daytime, many other scientists would be milling around doing minimal observations and testing—after the main hours of operation, though, that just left observation duties, and typically only one scientist and one guard would be posted inside the lab to watch over it. The nighttime observation shifts were only four hours, meaning each night, they needed four volunteers. Everyone had settled into an unofficial volunteer schedule, but Tommy gladly took over other people’s shifts for them several times a week so he could have some relative peace while he studied the Nihilanth’s sweet voice.
It didn’t sing often, but Tommy collected as many samples as he could when it did. Just as the others had tried to convince him, it didn’t seem like there was much of a pattern that he could work off of—but Tommy was determined to figure something out. He was in the chamber one night, taking the second shift and hunched over a little shitty desk, head rested in his hands as he watched the Nihilanth patiently when the door opened unexpectedly. Tommy stared through the glass towards the door, watching one of the Coomers approach—the way he walked in confidently, he didn’t seem like the Coomer clone Tommy normally worked with.
“Hello, Tommy!” Dr. Coomer greeted with a smile. “It’s me! The original Dr. Coomer.”
“Oh! Hi.” Tommy greeted back awkwardly. “Ummm...are you like, supposed to be in here? You’re not the Dr. Coomer who works down here.”
“Well, probably not, but I know plenty about the Lambda team’s operations already.” Dr. Coomer admitted. “And I know you’ve been overworking yourself a little.”
Tommy stared up at Dr. Coomer in surprise. “Well, you know the Nihilanth needs—it needs to be watched 24/7.”
“Of course! But my clone has noted you’ve been taking quite a lot of shifts.” Dr. Coomer said, pulling up a chair and sitting down beside Tommy. “I think it would be in your best interest to go get some sleep, Tommy. You can’t expect to be making scientific breakthroughs with such little rest.”
“But I have to do this.” Tommy argued, nodding back to the Nihilanth. “It’s—it’s trying to communicate. And nobody else on this team is listening! It’s trapped here, and—and—nobody cares that it’s trying to tell us something. Wouldn’t that be horrible? To be taken to some...some alien planet and contained, and written off like you’re not—like you’re not even capable of...of...basic thought, just because you can’t speak their language?”
Dr. Coomer frowned, placing a comforting hand on Tommy’s shoulder. “...That would be terrible, Tommy. You’re right. What we’re doing here, it’s...it’s dreadful.”
Tommy let out a deep sigh, enjoying Dr. Coomer’s friendly presence beside him as he looked back at the Nihilanth.
“It would be unfair of me to—not to put in my best effort.” Tommy went on. “If it’s trying to tell us something, I—as someone part of this...this fucked up project, I have a responsibility to try and fix this whole mess.”
Dr. Coomer nodded in understanding. They sat in silence there for a little while, Tommy watching the Nihilanth with growing exhaustion. Maybe Dr. Coomer was right on some level, he started to think—running himself ragged like this might slow down his progress. Tommy rubbed his eyes, picking up one of the vials filled with a liquefied sample of the sweet voice, swirling with a combination of purple and green.
“I have ideas for what the colors mean.” Tommy said, setting down the vial. “They’re mostly just based on Sunkist’s behavior, though, and I don’t—I don’t know if, like, it’s gonna be the same, if I tried to apply my...my idea for their meanings on the Nihilanth’s intent. Most likely, Sunkist would have created her own...like...language with it, since she didn’t have any other sweet voice users around her. You know how, like, cats learn to meow at us because—because they learn that it gets a response from humans? That’s sort of what I’m thinking must have happened with her.”
Dr. Coomer put a hand to his chin thoughtfully. “Tommy, have you ever tried bringing Sunkist in here?”
Tommy looked at Dr. Coomer, hoping he would elaborate.
“If Sunkist can use the sweet voice, it might be worthwhile to see the Nihilanth’s reaction to her speaking.” Dr. Coomer explained. “You may be able to parse patterns when something using its own language attempts speaking to it.”
A massive, excited grin spread across Tommy’s face. He slapped the desk enthusiastically several times with his open palm, gripping Dr. Coomer’s sleeve with his other hand. “That’s—that’s a great idea, Dr. Coomer!” Tommy reached into his pocket, taking out his keys and placing them in Dr. Coomer’s hand. “Would you go get Sunkist for me, please?”
“Well, I was sort of thinking this ought to be something you attempt later, after getting some s—”
“Please, Dr. Coomer?” Tommy begged. “I won’t be able to sleep at all if I don’t do this now!”
Dr. Coomer smiled back in defeat. “...Oh, alright. I’ll be right back. What dorm do you live in?”
Tommy told Dr. Coomer the location of his dorm, pacing in circles anxiously around the chamber as he waited impatiently for him to return. Finally, Dr. Coomer arrived back in the lab with a sleepy looking Sunkist, who greeted Tommy with a few licks on his hand. Tommy smiled fondly down at her, stroking her head gently.
“Sorry to wake you, Sunkist.” Tommy apologized. “Thanks, Dr. Coomer.”
“Of course!” Dr. Coomer replied. “I greatly admire your dedication, Tommy. More scientists here could use your conviction.”
Tommy couldn’t help but smile back at him. “Th-thanks, Dr. Coomer.” Turning back to Sunkist, Tommy gave her one more friendly pat before getting to work. “Sunkist, would you mind barking for me?”
Sunkist complied, barking several blue orbs enthusiastically. Tommy turned eagerly to the Nihilanth, waiting for a response. It took a moment, but just as Dr. Coomer had predicted, it began to sing a gradient of green to red. Tommy slapped Dr. Coomer’s shoulder several times excitedly with both hands.
“It replied! It replied!!” Tommy gasped. “Sunkist, can you do it again?”
Tommy eagerly scooped up a clipboard, scribbling down notes as Sunkist and the Nihilanth began—apparently—speaking to one another. Tommy could glean from Sunkist’s behavior that she was excited about this development, and the Nihilanth...well, it was difficult to tell. It wasn’t like he could see any body language from it, and even if he could, it was an alien—the body language of a dog was much easier to read than an alien’s. Tommy got some definite patterns from Sunkist, but none from the Nihilanth—he saw dozens of different color combinations before Sunkist eventually grew bored, leaving them in silence.
“If only I could...I had more control over this.” Tommy said thoughtfully around the end of the pen he was chewing on. “Sunkist is smart, but I don’t know if I could, umm...dictate to her what colors to use.”
“Either way, Tommy, you just made an incredible breakthrough.” Dr. Coomer said with a proud grin. “Perhaps more will come to you once you get some sleep, hmm?”
“I can’t sleep now! I just got more—more information than I’ve gotten in months!” Tommy complained.
“That’s exactly why you should get some sleep.” Dr. Coomer said firmly. “Go along, I’ll take over the rest of your shift.”
“But—”
“I’m not taking no for an answer this time, Tommy.” Dr. Coomer insisted. “I’m certain all the information you’ve gathered will make far more sense once you’ve slept.”
Tommy sighed in defeat. “...Okay. Thank you, Dr. Coomer.”
****
Dr. Coomer had been right that Tommy desperately needed more sleep than he was getting, but to Tommy’s great disappointment, his notes didn’t make any more sense the following morning. It was, at least, a major breakthrough to prove that the Nihilanth responded to its own language, but he got the feeling it wasn’t going to be enough.
Tommy took a tangent from trying to find patterns in sweet voice usage to return to studying the sweet voice itself. If he could find a way to control it himself in order to communicate specific colors of his choosing at the Nihilanth, that could be massively helpful to his research—but even with a deeper knowledge of the sweet voice than anyone else on the Lambda team, he felt out of his depth trying to figure out how to recreate it. When Tommy felt as though his brain was on the verge of exploding, he stood from the desk in the Nihilanth’s lab, deciding he might feel a little better after a lunch break.
Tommy took an empty seat in the cafeteria closest to his lab, resting his aching head in one hand as he sipped at a soda. Think about something else, he told himself. He closed his eyes, trying instead to focus on the sounds around him.
“Tommy!”
Tommy jumped in surprise, turning to face Dr. Coomer, followed by Bubby. They seemed like the Dr. Coomer and Bubby, Tommy thought—he normally didn’t see them eating lunch together in this section of the facility. Dr. Coomer took a seat beside Tommy with a bagged lunch, though, followed by Bubby with a tray of shitty cafeteria food.
“How is your research going?” Dr. Coomer asked curiously.
Tommy let out a deep, exhausted sigh, resting his forehead on the table.
“That bad?” Bubby asked flatly.
“I understand more about the sweet voice, now, but...” Tommy paused, sitting up to rest his chin in his hands. “I just...don’t know how I can get enough control of it to try to talk to it myself.”
“‘Sweet voice’?” Bubby questioned. “What the hell are you doing down there in the Lambda lab?”
“Oh, yeah, I—I sort of forgot you’re not...the Bubby I work with.” Tommy muttered sheepishly.
“I get that a lot.” Bubby scoffed.
Tommy took a brief moment to explain his dilemma to Bubby.
“I don’t know, communicating with some incomprehensible Eldritch alien monster doesn’t sound like a great idea.” Bubby commented. “Besides, even if you’re able to convince the Lambda team to send it back, based on what I’m hearing about it, that could take a massive amount of power that we may not be able to save up again. Taking things from Xen is one thing, sending them there is another—I’m sure it’s a wonder we even managed to get it here.”
“Exactly! We managed to get it here, so we should be able to send it back!” Tommy argued. “We—we have a responsibility to set things right, Dr. Bubby.”
“Hey, I’m sure you’re right.” Bubby said, holding his hands up in mock surrender. “But our technology is unpredictable. We’ve had hiccups before. It’s entirely possible we dragged something here that we’re not going to be able to send back.”
“Perhaps we ought to take this one step at a time.” Dr. Coomer suggested gently. “Tommy, if you paired with somebody from the cybernetics department, then perhaps they could help you create a device to utilize the sweet voice.”
“Oh!” Tommy exclaimed. “That’s a great idea!”
“Always the cybernetics with you.” Bubby muttered.
“I’m always happy to help a good friend.” Dr. Coomer replied with a smile. “I’ll connect you with one of my friends in the cybernetics department, I’m certain she’ll be eager to help you.”
Tommy grinned. Dr. Coomer considered Tommy a good friend? “Thank you so much, Dr. Coomer.”
Dr. Coomer followed up on his promise, and Tommy worked closely with a very enthusiastic employee of the cybernetics department by the name of Beatrice, giving her as much information as he could about the sweet voice and what he needed it for. After several weeks, Beatrice finally got back to Tommy, informing him she had a concept for how to utilize the sweet voice.
It was a little more intrusive than what Tommy had been picturing. He’d thought she might make some sort of handheld device—what she presented to him was a cybernetic enhancement to his vocal cords. While she babbled on about the usage of the body’s naturally produced chemicals as a fully controllable source, rather than having to constantly collect the ingredients needed to feed into a device, it made perfect sense to Tommy, but damn. It wasn’t a possibility he had been mentally prepared for when he woke up that morning. He took a little bit to think about it; it was the best method of using the sweet voice, but that sure was a permanent change to his body, wasn’t it? After sleeping on it, Tommy made his decision. As long as it had a chance at furthering his research, it was for the best—plus, it would be cool to be able to do himself, even after he no longer needed it. He put in his volunteer request and was processed and scheduled within the day.
Dr. Coomer and Bubby showed up before Tommy’s surgery as emotional support, easing his anxiety about the procedure immensely before he was wheeled into the lab. Beatrice wasn’t shy about telling Tommy exactly how excited she was about this project as she strapped a mask over his face to deliver the anesthetic—and Tommy wasn’t sure whether the excitement was comforting or not, but if nothing else, at least he didn’t have too much time left to be nervous before he was out cold.
Tommy didn’t know immediately how well the surgery went when he woke. He had been directed to try and avoid speaking at all costs for the next two weeks, and not to use the sweet voice for the next five weeks—so he spent the first two weeks of his recovery in his dorm, visited several times by Dr. Coomer and Bubby. Despite Tommy’s extreme eagerness to get back to work, it was nice to have some time where he quietly showed his interests to these two old men who had verbally confirmed to him that they were his friends. Dr. Coomer and Bubby weren’t too excited by the video games Tommy tried to introduce them to at first, but Tommy tried a different approach, dragging out his SNES and showing them a game he was certain might catch at least Dr. Coomer’s attention.
“Super Punch Out?” Dr. Coomer read off the cartridge. “Oh, I do love punching.”
Tommy nodded enthusiastically before starting up the game for him. Dr. Coomer got way into it—before Tommy knew it, it was two in the morning, and Dr. Coomer still showed no signs of exhaustion while Bubby snored on the couch. Tommy smiled, stroking Sunkist’s head gently as he nodded off himself.
****
The day finally came when Tommy could attempt using the sweet voice. Beatrice had requested to be there when he tested it out—he couldn’t allow her into the Lambda lab, so he headed down to the cybernetics department that morning to show it off. Tommy cleared his throat, averting his gaze nervously as Beatrice stared at him with an expectant, excited smile.
Tommy took a deep breath and made a long, strained “aaaahhh” sound—with no sweet voice to show for it. Tommy’s face flushed in embarrassment.
“Ummm...I’m not...sure how to use it.” He muttered.
“C’mon, you gotta sing.” Beatrice encouraged.
Tommy cleared his throat again and sang a single note. This time, Tommy’s eyes widened as pink orbs shot out of his mouth, floating up towards the ceiling, just like Sunkist and the Nihilanth. Beatrice pumped her fists enthusiastically.
“Yesss! First try!” Beatrice exclaimed in excitement. “How’s it feel?”
“Weird.” Tommy replied with a small laugh. “It...it has a taste, too. It tastes like...like, ummm...pink.”
“Fuck, dude, it sure is pink.” Beatrice said with a nod. “Try some other colors! Remember, it’s based on pitch.”
Tommy complied, singing a long rainbow of sweet voice. Normally, Tommy despised singing in front of others, but the reward of colorful orbs coming out of his mouth from it was enough to get him excited about showing it off. After Beatrice announced she had another surgery to get to, Tommy rushed back to the Lambda lab, bursting into the Nihilanth’s room and practically pressing himself up against the glass, ignoring his coworkers who stared at him curiously.
“Nihilanth! I can use it now!” Tommy shouted. He cleared his throat, took a deep breath, and sang a few blue orbs at the glass.
The Nihilanth almost immediately sang back, green to red—just like when Sunkist had been introduced. It could be a coincidence, sure, but that was the first and strongest lead to a pattern Tommy had gotten in all his time studying the sweet voice.
“Holy shit, what? ” One of the scientists questioned as Tommy scooped up a clipboard to begin taking notes. “Is that what your voluntary surgery was for?”
Tommy nodded with a grin before turning back to the Nihilanth, repeating green to red back at it. They did this for a long time, repeating gradients back at each other as Tommy took extensive notes. After the day was over, Tommy gripped his clipboard tightly in his hands, rushing straight to the administrator’s office. He didn’t even bother knocking—in his extreme excitement to finally be so close to his goal, Tommy threw the door open, standing in front of Dr. Breen’s desk and bouncing on his heels. Dr. Breen stared up at him wordlessly in shock.
“Dr. Breen!” Tommy exclaimed, holding out the clipboard for him to look at. It wasn’t presentable at all, but Tommy figured this would require more of an in-person demonstration than a beautiful looking report. “I’ve been studying the—the sweet voice extensively ever since—the Lambda lab, I’m—the Nihilanth...”
“Mr. Coolatta, would you at least take a second to collect yourself before you try telling me what this is about?” Dr. Breen interrupted impatiently.
Tommy paused, took a deep breath, and did his best to clear his head. “Ever since joining the Lambda team, I’ve studied—I’ve been studying the sweet voice. I believe it’s been trying to communicate. I tried telling the...the head of the Lambda team, but he said it wasn’t—there wasn’t enough evidence. So I gathered evidence. I found patterns in the color gradients—the sweet voice, it uses specific colors for specific, ummm, specific reasons. I think it’s intelligent, and it’s—it’s unethical to keep it here in Black Mesa. We should send it back to Xen.”
Dr. Breen’s expression didn’t change. All he did was raise an eyebrow, fingers laced together as he stared at Tommy.
“Sure, it’s intelligent.” Dr. Breen finally said. “The thought crossed my mind. That’s no reason to spend time and resources on sending it all the way back though, Mr. Coolatta. A thing like that, we’d have to put everything on hold for—what, a year? A year and a half, at best?—just to eventually save up the resources and power to barely send it back in one piece. I’m not going to bring everything to a halt just for whatever that thing is. We have deadlines to meet.”
Tommy frowned deeply, gripping the clipboard tight in his hands.
“Besides, don’t you have the Nihilanth to thank for your dog?” Dr. Breen questioned, leaning back in his chair. “Think of all the scientific marvels that could come from having it to test on! Would you really be so eager to send something like that back?”
“...Of course I would.”
Dr. Breen shook his head. “Mr. Coolatta, I appreciate you’re concerned for the Nihilanth’s wellbeing and whatnot, but you have to think of the bigger picture here—”
Tommy felt that click in his head again as he leaned forward, pressing palms on Dr. Breen’s desk. Dr. Breen leaned back, shoulders growing tense as he glanced around himself in surprise—though Tommy didn’t care what for.
“I’ve put too much work into this!” Tommy said through gritted teeth. “We brought it here! We can’t be—we can’t just keep it here because you don’t want to fix what you caused. I don’t care how long it takes, I don’t care how many projects we have to—we have to put on pause, the right thing to do is send it back to its home.”
“Tommy.” Dr. Breen practically hissed. “You have no idea what it is.”
“Neither do you!”
“Is it even going to survive back on Xen?” Dr. Breen demanded. “When we transported it here, something happened along the way. It’s unstable. If you want to send it back, you’re going to have to figure all this out for yourself—exactly what it’s supposed to be, how we can fix it after whatever happened during transport, how much it would cost us to fix it, how much it would cost on top of that to send it back—everything. Are you really willing to take that responsibility?”
“Yes!” Tommy answered whole-heartedly. “If nobody else in this fucking facility will do it, then I will.”
“Fine then. If you can give me a completely comprehensive report on all of that, I’ll consider it.”
Tommy didn’t move, staring at Dr. Breen with a deep scowl.
“Fine! If it’s satisfactory, I’ll accept your request!” Dr. Breen caved, sweat beading up on his forehead. “I’ll do what you want, just—just stop whatever this is, okay?”
Tommy took his clipboard back and stepped away from Dr. Breen’s desk, relaxing a little as he started to feel more normal. He wasn’t quite sure what Dr. Breen meant, but he’d gotten what he wanted, sort of. It was a step in the right direction. He nodded, exhaustion creeping up in his muscles as Dr. Breen sighed in relief.
“I’ll give you partial to full clearance to whatever department you need to get your report done.” Dr. Breen said, pressing his fingers to his temples. “However much time you need, take it—just...don’t do that again.”
Dr. Breen really didn’t like confrontation, Tommy noted as he nodded again.
“Can I ask you something, Mr. Coolatta?” Dr. Breen asked, exhaustion in his tone as he looked up at Tommy.
“Hm?”
“Why do you care so much about that thing?”
Tommy fiddled with the clip on his clipboard as he thought his answer over. “Well...I mean, it’s just the right thing to do. Do I—do I need a big answer for that? It’s just...morality. I don’t need a reason to have a strong moral code, Dr. Breen.”
Dr. Breen let out a tired chuckle. “When you’ve been in this business for a while, I think you’ll understand my position a little more. Science and morality don’t necessarily get along.”
“What? No.” Tommy shook his head. “Just because you’re a scientist doesn’t mean—you can’t just excuse your actions like that. I think you’re probably just a bad person.”
Dr. Breen stared at Tommy in surprise.
“Thanks for ok’ing my project, Dr. Breen.” Tommy said politely, turning to leave the office. “I’m gonna go get started.”
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