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#there isn't food they can get at!
sixthousandbees · 1 year
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I just saw a mouse on my wall-mounted shelf. it is very messy, but theres no way up. I am scared and confused. people like to say that the animals were here first. but thats not true! I was here first, and mice and wasps and flies and moths and fucking STOATS are INVADING my SPACE
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hailsatanacab · 6 months
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A Persuasive Argument - dpxdc
"Great!" Danny says, clapping his hands together to get everyone's attention. The dinner table falls silent as everyone looks towards him. It's a full house today and, honestly, Danny's a little nervous. "I'm sure you're all wondering why I gathered you here today."
"It's dinnertime. In our house." Duke mutters, while doing a very bad job of concealing his yawn. He holds his fork poised over the braised beef, but, just like everyone else, still looks towards Danny before tucking in. It's intriguing enough to wait.
"Yeah, no one misses Alfie's dinner." Dick says, with a brilliant smile that Danny can't help but return.
"Precisely! What better time to talk to you all than when you're all actually here!"
"Wait, I thought you came round to work on our English essays?" Tim asks, blinking owlishly.
"I'm afraid I've lured you here under false pretences, Tim."
"This is where I live."
"I would still really appreciate help on that essay though, I mean, what the hell is Hamlet even about? I just don't get that old time-y language, like 'Hark! A ghost hath killed me!' - absolute rubbish, what does that even mean?"
"The ghost never kills anyone in Hamlet, he's there to tell Hamlet that he was murdered. Have you actually read it?"
"No, but it sounds like you have. Tim, I want this guy to help me with my essay instead. I know for a fact that you haven't read Hamlet, either."
"So? We don't need Jason, I've read the Sparknotes."
"Hi Jason, I'm Danny, pleasure to meet you, summarise Hamlet in three sentences or less."
"Am I auditioning to help you write your essays? I can't believe you’ve gone through your whole school life without reading it, it’s good!"
"Hamlet, along with a number of other classics, was banned in our house because it portrayed ghosts as intelligent and sympathetic beings rather than evil, animalistic beasts. I didn’t even get to see The Muppet's Christmas Carol until last year with Tim! It was surprisingly good, and I hate Christmas because everyone always argued and it sucked. But we're getting off topic. I—"
"No, no, please go back to that, because what the fu—"
"Boys, please." Bruce interrupts, looking to the world as if he wants to hang his head in his hands. "Danny, you were about to say something?"
"Oh, yeah, Mr. Wayne! Thanks!"
"Please, call me Bruce."
"Well, that very succinctly brings me to my point, because I'd actually really like to call you dad."
Nobody says a word. Nobody even blinks, all as shocked as the other, watching open-mouthed as Danny pulls his laptop out from beside his chair. Bruce can definitely feel a headache coming on.
"Before you say anything, I've prepared a 69 slide PowerPoint presentation on why you, Bruce Wayne, should adopt me, Danny Last-Name-Pending. Please save your questions, comments, and verdict until the end, thank you."
#dpxdc#batpham#i forget - can we tag the parent fandoms? w/e#immediately alfred's like: while i do appreciate your initiative may i suggest it wait until after dinner?#and danny - who has barely eaten proper homecooked food ever - takes one bite and then absolutely wolfs down the whole lot#after he's finished he's like 'bear with - I've got to add that to the 'Reasons I Would Like to Live Here' section'#danny's powerpoint has tailored sections for each batfam member with lists of reasons why they'd get along#my au thoughts on this is that the fentons disowned danny when he told them he was phantom#and that this is after the ultimate enemy - wherein which he allied himself with the JL to fight against dan#(which didnt really work at all - BUT he knows some of their identities now INCLUDING batman's)#so one of the main reasons why he'd be a great fit is that he knows their vigilante status anyway so they don’t need to worry about secrets#dick just turns to tim like 'he’s your friend. he learnt this from you.'#tim: 'i didn't tell him our identities!! i would never!!'#dick: 'no i know that. it's the stalker tendancies. it's baby tim all over again'#tim: scandalised gasp#they all eat dinner in silence just super subdued and in shock and sending glances to bruce and danny#duke like: 'so i know I'm the last one in the family but like... this isn't how it normally happens right? did any of you make powerpoints?#tim gets all shifty because he absolutely did make a powerpoint he just never actually showed it to anyone#everyone stares at tim because they all know. it was in one of bab's blackmail files she has on him#damian's slide has danny offering to throw down at any time. 'tim says you like to prove yourself with your skills?#how about a real challenge? if i beat you then you have to vote yes to adopting me!'#damian is in two minds about accepting because... 1) look at him damian could take danny in his sleep! but#2) on the off chance that he does win... damian does not want any more brothers#(he takes the bet and its a suprisingly fun fight - and while he'll never say this... he would vote yes even without the wager)#on one of danny's slides there's a picture of ellie: you'll also get my clone sister! two children for the price of one!!#uhhh.... thats it now - I've been having fun with this haha#spent all day with the 'ive lured you here under false pretences' 'danny i live here' line in my head haha#anyway enjoy!!!!!! this was fun#i wanna make these slides so bad
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the-witchhunter · 8 months
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DP x DC: The Titans and the Phantom Cat
Danny doesn't do magic. He doesn't understand it or really know about it, and frankly he'd be more skeptical about it if it hadn't explicitly been used on him several times before. His parents are scientists and engineers, and they managed to accomplish what would typically fall under the realm of magic with nothing but recycled parts, wires and Fenton ingenuity.
So, when caught in a magic spell to bind him, he didn't know what would happen if he were to intentionally mess it up. Apparently, nothing good. Danny, free from the intended mind control, is now bound to the form of a cat with minimal use of his powers.
How could this get any worse?
Turns out, no one seems to understand what he's saying, they just hear meows. And without the use of his powers, he get's caught and finds himself in an animal shelter in Jump City.
When a group of young heroes comes through on a mission, and then proceed to mess things up, Danny can't help but throw out some snide commentary. Besides, it's not like they'll hear him
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Welllllll... Turns out Raven and Beast Boy can tell what the hell he's saying. Of course the magic user and guy who can turn into animals can talk to him... Still it's nice to finally have someone to talk to, and also get him out of the cage while he's still trying to het a hold of what's left of his powers
Raven immediately clocks him as a powerful spirit bound to animal form. With a little persuasion, she ends up with a new familiar consultant and Danny the Cat gets to live in Titans Tower with them
or
Magic shenanigans happen, now Danny is basically Salem the Cat living with the Teen Titans and teaching them what he knows while mainly lounging around and sassing them. The actual usefulness of his advice may vary
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sergle · 4 months
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I think my favorite thing about doing ginger red hair instead of cherry red hair is: lying to people about it
#I love the cherry red / wine red and I'll probably go back at some point bc it's my Origin.#but for now.#I don't actively lie to people but bc it's a Natural and Plausible hair color#and I'm already pale and I dye my eyebrows to match my hair. ppl figure it's natural#and it has come up MULTIPLE TIMES. and I've recently been rolling with it instead of correcting ppl. bc who cares?#recent examples that come to mind (but I did correct them in this one) my surgeon assuming it was natural#and using my genetics as a natural redhead as a baseline to tell me about what I can expect from my future scarring#and then again later with the anesthesia. they were going to dose me differently#the anesthesiologist glanced at me when I came into the OR and was getting the stuff ready on his cart#and when he heard me talking to my doc and re-telling him that oh the hair isn't natural#he was behind the curtain like FUCK#taking shit off his cart and quietly redoing his setup#that's how I learned that redheads need higher doses of anesthesia than other ppl.#they also need more of the topical stuff like lidocaine. apparently they metabolize it faster(?)#ANYWAY he was going to up my dose thinking I needed it lol#so i almost got way more sedatives and pain meds than i needed bc of my hair dye LMAOOO#other more Normal Life examples was a country dude in full hunting gear holding a door open for me someplace#and I said thank you and he lifted his hat up to point at his (natural) red hair and said ''twins!''#this one sticks with me because that was such a cute thing to do. what the hell#and at snakefest I was talking to some people at their food truck. there was an older guy who trapped me into a convo for like 30mins#he was Very Nice. and they were going to some type of irish festival next and said I should go too bc I'll be right at home#flat out just was like. this bitch looks irish#and I don't know why all of this is so funny to me. it has no reason to be.
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notbecauseofvictories · 2 months
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I wish there were more restaurants with affordable prix fixe or tasting menus. I would love for nice but not ridiculously fancy restaurants to basically say "here is what we're sure is good today, you can eat that or maybe one or two other things. Otherwise come back in 2-3 days and see if that's more interesting."
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dollypopup · 21 days
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like. . .are any other Polin fans out there that do not give a singular flying fuck about Debling? we should form a club lol because from the very bottom of my heart and with my whole chest: I could not care less about him. Not sorry, I'm tuning into S3 for Pen and Colin and Pen and Colin alone
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revawake · 1 year
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Lottie pre-crash eating her breakfast alone save for the maid who works for the Matthews, who is both Lottie's subject in a way (serving her) and her superior in a way (acting as an extension of her father's will, serving her medications she's not allowed to decline).
Lottie as an adult crafting herself a home where she can permanently banish the isolation and powerlessness of her childhood without losing its comforts. She's fixing it. She'll be what her father wasn't. Loving, not cruel. Liberating, not tyrannical.
She's a healer. She's a leader! She acts graciously when one of her servants followers serves her maca root instead of ashwaghanda. She makes it a rule that they can leave whenever they want!
Lottie in the wilderness hallucinating all her friends eating together, and look, even though she's died her disciple best friend Laura Lee is there and she already served got her some takeout! And Jackie isn't there there's one free seat just for Lottie!
Lottie's the good queen. Someone has to be! They can't all be unborn queens, she tells herself, or else she everyone would starve!
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uncanny-tranny · 10 months
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I really wish there was more insight as to why children are "picky eaters" because the way people go about "fixing us" can be detrimental to our relationship with food.
When I was a kid, I was obviously neurodivergent, and I wasn't tested for anything and never received any support. I was a huge "picky eater" to the point that going to a new restaurant with a menu I didn't know would send me into panic mode. I didn't understand why I felt that way, I didn't understand that I wasn't a selfish, horrible kid for being unable to force myself to eat. I'd be the person sitting at the dining room table for hours because I just couldn't force myself to eat the food I was given.
I understand why parents do that. It can be concerning when you think your kid isn't getting the proper nutrition. It's concerning when a kid's pallete is overly shrunk down. But if you're going about it in a punishing way, you only reinforce the idea that food is bad and dangerous. And if a child knows that eating their food would cause them less grief and stress than not eating the food, and yet they still will not or cannot eat, that's a sign. Maybe work with children, try to understand why they're a "picky eater." Chances are they're not doing it because they personally want to spite you and they despise your very aura.
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chaoswillcalmusdown · 2 months
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Saltburn: The Tumblr-ification of Cinema
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pegglefan69 · 2 months
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planning on dyeing a bunch of white yarn in my stash with the onion skins I saved from the local farm last year, then knitting a vest out of it...planning even further ahead to try & dye yarn with some of their beets & marigolds too later this year... I think it'd be really cute to have an ongoing 'farm vest' project >:^)
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carbonateddelusion · 6 months
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I know I haven't said much about it, but legitimately, "running away" was one of the most pivotal life decisions I've ever made. Probably THE first major life decision I've made, and also the best. If you have an opportunity to go, leave. Get out of there. If you are not safe at home, emotionally, physically, whatever, and you're able to leave, do it. It's going to suck such major ass for a while because you're going to have to deal with the scars they've left on you, but I wholeheartedly, full-throatedly, with-my-chest promise you that it is going to be better. You're going to be better. If you have the privilege of being able to escape, no matter how difficult it feels, then RUN.
#whatever you leave behind is not your responsibility. sometimes you're gonna have a fucked relationship with the siblings you 'abandoned'#but they have to understand that you had to leave. and that you were actively fighting to take them with you the entire time#it's okay to be selfish. you need to be selfish to start to recover.#if you have to be homeless please look up and do your research on local resources first. plan things out.#i was lucky enough to have family who'd been waiting years and years for this moment to happen#if you can go and have your college dorm as a safe haven then absolutely take that chance#if you can go and rent an apartment with the money from your job then take that chance#plan shit. do it. even if your brain fights you. you do not want to be out there without proper precautions or else you could end up-#-seriously fucked over.#also i know i'm encouraging people to get out but in equal measure:#if it isn't safe to leave you are not lesser for staying.#if it's winter and you can't be out there alone you are not complicit in your own abuse yk?#if you have family you CANNOT leave behind like extremely young siblings then you are not at fault for staying.#i was lucky enough to be able to leave quickly and (relatively) painlessly and i'm aware that not everybody can do that#sometimes staying IS the better choice. but that's a choice YOU have to make not me#assess your situation properly. are you staying for your own safety or because you're scared?#etc etc. obviously take all of this with a grain of salt i don't have all the life experience in the world just what little i have#also: prepaid phones are a godsend. MRIs. canned food. make sure to have first aid kits if needed. plan ahead. have a stash somewhere safe#rox rumblings#me things
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thehealingsystem · 1 year
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Seeing some debate on if in game henry being an ink version of him makes the time loops less evil and imo it makes it even MORE evil. He was given false memories of a life he never lived, been put through hell and back ever since creation and has no hope of any other purpose in the world. He was literally MADE to suffer. And he isn't even the henry that had left joey, just some replica he made to take his anger out on with no regards to that person's wellbeing
Just because he's made of ink doesn't mean he's any less alive. He still feels things, still has thoughts and opinions, still conscious, he is a living being. No, just because he isn't the real guy doesn't make it less cruel. Its just as, or even more so, a disgusting and evil thing to do to him
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goldkirk · 3 months
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question: have any of you personally seen a dietician (not looking for experiences with nutritionists, only dieticians), and did you find it helpful or useful, and if you did see a dietician and you ALSO have seen a GI doctor, how did the experience compare for you in terms of helpfulness + how much you felt listened to and helped?
#i'm trying to figure out which doctor appointments I want to bother making and spending money about for potentially no return on investment#and right now i'm trying to figure out if I'd get way more practical help from a dietician or if I need to suck it up and find a#not-elderly not-male not-dismissive GI doctor first and THEN see a dietician#although I cannot afford a bunch of tests#so like???#trying to figure out if a dietician would be more helpful overall with me not HAVING any GI diagnoses or eating disorders#and just really struggling with food in both sensory ways and unpredictable digestion ways that don't correlate with food allergies#god i sometimes wish i had food allergies so i could have some predictability#but yeah. i'm leaning towards dietician but figured i should crowdsource experiences#since I know a lot of you have health issues you've also been trying to manage for years and probably have good advice#if it helps i'm also in a major city now and have a decent-but-not-great health insurance plan so I'm good on those two fronts#to do#health#I know a dietician can't diagnose anything but I'd love help figuring out how to get maximum nutrition even when i can barely eat anything#or when my body decides to start getting sick from or (tw emetophobia) puking up fiber or fatty foods#which thankfully isn't often#now that I do cannabis daily in microdosing I have so much less pain and bloating and nausea#but when it hits it HITS#and the last time I tried going without cannabis for a couple days and then eating a fiber muffin I was sick six times in one morning#and didn't get my normal eating ability back until dinnertime#luckily that's not normal for me#but my issues bounce up and down so much#and I lose weight so fast whenever my appetite goes from 'barely ever there' to 'negatively nonexistent'#and I had like. two months last year where I think i reached my body's natural healthy set weight#and i needed so much food but it felt so good energy wise and temperature wise#and i'd like to STAY THERE FFS#and I feel like a dietician would be helpful for making meal options for good#*good and hard and nuclear alert level eating difficulty times#anyway. crowdsourcing. yay!
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swiftcast-selene · 2 months
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Day 3: Free day
now that he doesn't have to survive off scraps, Negi'll be the first to admit he's gotten a little... spoiled. turns out having someone to help out makes traveling a lot easier... who would've thought?
(featuring @duisarcusxiv's Sagra!)
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twpsyn-who · 8 days
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Soulmates AU in which your soul is bounded to your soulmate's soul.
What does that mean exactly? That when you die, if your soulmate is still alive you can't move on. Instead your soul is stuck by your soulmate's side until they die too, so the two souls can become one in death. Depending on how strong the bond between the two is, one could see (and even interact!) with their deceased soulmate.
Now this but, you know by now, JeanMarco. With Marco waking up and the first thing he saw was Jean's terrified face while looking at the dead body- Marco's half eaten dead body. He learns it pretty quickly that he can't leave Jean's side, bound to follow his best friend around. He also learns that is possible for Jean to see and hear him during the ceremony of burning the fallen soldiers during Trost ; it lasted so little, too little for all the things Marco wanted to say. If he knew Jean was listening from the beginning, he would've started with exposing Reiner and Berthold right away. By the time he took notice that not only Jean was looking at him, but listening too, it was too late. Every other word from him was meet with silence, unheard by the living.
Isn't until the 57th expedition outside the walls that Marco learns that he can interact with Jean too, touch him. In his panic after Jean's failed attack on the Female Titan Marco didn't think and went straight to his best friend's side, touching his shoulder while looking for any injuries. Jean's eyes went straight to the place Marco's was touching, looking confused- until he followed the arm and saw Marco in front of his very own eyes. And just like everything, it lasted too little for Marco's liking. The Female Titan took hold of Reiner, crushing him in her hand, and Jean could no longer see him.
It was later, much much later than either of them would've liked, for Marco to understand how everything works. To know that he could only interact with Jean when his mind was filled with thoughts of Marco. By then Jean already began to move on, the secret of Reiner and Berthold's true selves already out. So Marco could only watch, unable to be there for his other half- for Jean.
And it was when they saw the ocean for the first time that Marco understood why he was truly stuck by Jean's side. When he saw his best friend having fun with the others and realized just how much he loves him. When he realizes that all he truly wants is to be by Jean's side, the way they promised each other to do during their training days.
Edit : Think of Ben and Klaus Hargreeves for easier visual.
#Jean starting to think of Marco less and less until he becomes a mere memory in the back of his head#While Marco keeps thinking of Jean more and more hoping for at least one more second together#Marco telling Jean to calm down while he's attacking Annie in her crystal and that being the only reason he even stopped :)#Them having so many small moments but Jean thinking he lost his fucking mind#Sometimes Marco's voice would tell Jean to dodge or something and Jean would hesitate one second- just for it to be the right call#Marco yelling 'Jean! Look out!' when Gabi gets inside the airship and Jean looks towards the entrance but is too late-#Gabi already shoot Sasha by then#Marco feeling SO GUILTY over it because he couldn't warm them sooner#But also Marco and Sasha chilling together because Sasha couldn't leave Connie's side either#And her describing to him all the food Niccolo has cooked for her! The taste and the different textures and the bright colors!#'Of course I love Connie! He's my other half my twin! You must love Jean very much too to be stuck by his side all this time!'#'Of course I do. He's my other half too. My everything' and that's when they realize that their situation isn't the same#That Marco's love for Jean wasn't the same as Sasha's love for Connie#anyway#aot#jean kirstein#jeanmarco#aot jean#marco bodt#marco bott#snk#aot marco#jean kirschstein#soulmate au#JeanMarco Soulmate AU#I mean it can be platonic if you truly want. But I don't want to so there's that lol#Hesitate no second*
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anyoldfandom · 12 days
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The problem with starting to think about the Pack more is the fact that now I want to grab Skalamander the same way I grabbed Bobo like. My house now. I want to use your character potential.
#Generator rex#genrex#Just. Ough. OUGH.#Bobo was just a bad use of his potential but Skalamander is just a nothing use of his potential. Very little character there.#But looking at his design I just. Cannot get the question out of my head of 'Is it painful?'#Is he an EVO who lives in constant pain? We see that he can't stop drooling and is blind on one 'side' of his head.#And his tongue flops around when he has his mouth open. His skin stretches and sags in awkward places#It makes me think that he probably lives a pain-filled life and has probably got a wrecked mind bc of it. And then follows VK#Someone who looks at him and says You are not broken. I have use of you. I have salvation.#And with the disability symbolism with Genrex Skalamander also looks the most chronic pain having#Though granted most EVOs with significant body changes probably have chronic pain#I just. Head in hands. Fucked up lizard. How much of his mind is actually still there.#Do you think he has good days and bad days. Bad days where he can't move or days where his mind is more of a mess than usual.#He definitely has to struggle to eat and drink. With no other mouth.#Thinking also in context of Rex Pack AU of like. Skalamander having his bad days and having people who actually care about him#Doing the best they can to help. Bringing him food and water with specially designed straws and utensils#Sitting and talking to him on days his mind isn't fully there so at least he's not alone. Giving him space if he needs it#But making sure to keep a close eye on absolutely anything he needs.#Bc they're one big disabled family and they take care of each other
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