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sheastri · 2 days

Text

Hell N Back ft. op81

Pairing: oscar piastri x fem!black reader

Genre: Social Media AU with story

Summary: In which the reader was finally done with love until Oscar came into her life and charmed (all he had to do was exist) her into giving love another chance.

Warning(s): None.

A/N: Recently been thinking about f1 so I decided why not write??Title inspired by "Hell N Back Bakar ft. Summer Walker" because I've been obsessed with it lately!! No specific fan cast, just photos off of Pinterest.

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The First Meeting

2 years ago

Y/n was walking down a street flooded by shops all around her with her best friend, A'lidyah. The two women were in deep conversation about love. Y/n was almost sure she would never comfortably be in love again and A'lidyah was telling her that love comes to you when you least expect it.

"You shouldn't fully mark it off because of a few mishaps. And love comes in so many different forms and can be found in so many different aspects of life." A'lidyah explained while moving her hands to emphasize her point.

"You know what, you're right. I love seeing the smiles of the people who walk the streets, I love skipping through town hand in hand, and I love music. I'm so grateful to have you in my life, like seriously." Y/n said smiling at her friend sincerely. A'lidyah returned the smile saying something along the lines of "life would be so dull without you, i thank God for you everyday." The conversation then resumed, the two girls having smiles seemingly permanently edged on to their faces.

While Y/n was speaking she momentarily shifted her eyes to glance at something on the side of the street that A'lidyah stood on and in that quick second she had walked into someone. He managed to catch her by her waist before she had fallen and she immediately began apologizing before looking up at the man.

As Y/n shifted to meet the gaze of her saving grace, she found she was met with a face that displayed the thoughts crossing her mind at the moment. Wide eyes and mouth agape, the man must've been experiencing the shock that circled her mind at the moment. She only broke through this trance at the sound of a witch like cackling that could come from no one other than A'lidyah. Y/n raised her eyebrow and side eyed her best friend with a smile on her face before turning her attention back on to the man who stood in front of her.

They exchanged eye contact one last time before his hold on her waist loosened and Y/n stepped back and bent down to pick up the things that fell on the floor. Oscar soon joined her and then apologized for almost knocking her over.

"Ah, no worries it was mostly my fault and I was able to be saved by a handsome man so I'd say we're pretty even?" Y/n responded cheekily.

"A handsome man? And then you a beautiful woman? Almost seems like a match made in heaven, wouldn't cha say?" The man said while his face was very clearly flushed and he looked like he had to muster up all his confidence and self-control to not stutter. His pupils then went off to the side catching another woman in his line of sight. Seeing that the man had directed his attention to her A'lidyah began to speak.

"That's actually perfect, Y/n needs someone other than me to add a little bit of pizazz and all that fun stuff to her life, mind giving her a name?" A'lidyah says holding back a teasing smile. "Oh that's my bad. The names Oscar, Oscar Piastri. It's nice to meet you Y/n and..."

"Oh I'm A'lidyah! Her wife, her wingman, her manager, and most importantly her best friend. Oscar meet Y/n, Y/n meet Oscar!" The girl says enthusiastically. The two laugh but greet each other anyway.

They exchanged numbers and that day when Y/n went home she found the idea of love just a bit more appealing and Oscar... well let's just say his google history was flooded with many "Do I Have a Crush?" quizzes, a lot more "How to Know if Your in Love" blogs, and one slightly embarrassing question that his friends would definitely tease him about, not that they wouldn't tease him about what he had already been searching up anyway.

Y/n is now following Oscar Piastri

Oscar Piastri is now following Y/n

♫ Could you tell where my head was at when you found me? Me and you went to hell and back just to find peace ♫

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Current Time

yourusername

liked by oscarpiastri, whosalidyah, mclaren and 276,943 others

yourusername last photo is from me and lidyah's latest gossip session

view all 7,983 comments

whosalidyah not your boy in the likes...🤭

yourusername guys what is this crazy woman talking about?? username girl... you are NOT slick username not alidyah exposing her😭

carlossainz55 can't wait to meet you at our next race!

liked by creator

username anyone noticed that both oscar and mclaren liked??

username that's suspicious🤨 username that's weird...

oscarpiastri no photo creds after standing in the middle of the road to take that second one??

yourusername you're still alive and well?? landonorris justice for my boy oscar😪 whosalidyah burning all my number 4 mclaren merch landonorris I take back my earlier statement, I was misguided please forgive me oscarpiastri the things that love does to people🤦

username ignoring that 3rd photo for my peace of mind

username not me finding out my wife is cheating on me on my birthday

yourusername never bby 💕 oscarpiastri 🤥

mclaren come visit us in the paddock sometime soon!

yourusername I thought you'd never ask!! username oh?

username Man, I thought I had everything, I was lonely.

oscarpiastri

liked by yourusername, mclaren, landonorris, and 392,487 others

oscarpiastri Thanks to all the fans who came out to support @mclaren today.

yourusername Your nails are gorgg, who did them?? I need the number immediately🤭

oscarpiastri that information is classified🥱 username not y/n tryna act like those aren't her nails...

username babe... who's nails are those??

username why is lando lowkey looking like a snack in that photo??😩

landonorris it's just impossible for me to look bad, truly a gift and a curse😪 whosalidyah don't boost his ego too much now, im scared it might implode...

username just noticed that the nails match the colors on his helmet

username that's actually so cute wtff username oh it's seriousss

yourusername just a girl waiting for her photo creds

oscarpiastri just a boy waiting for the ones he was robbed of😣

username Now you're my everything, now it's on me.

mclaren

liked by yourusername, oscarpiastri, f1, and 203,587 others

mclaren Our papaya boys + Y/n = another good day in the paddock

yourusername I had an amazing time, thank you so much for inviting me (10/10 experience, would recommend).

mclaren You're welcome to join us again anytime!

username ok but who was y/n looking at because I don't think her smile could get any brighter??

username ik y/n was sick of them by the end of this😭

landnorris y/n run they're trying to recruit you

yourusername girl dw i'm already halfway down the road oscarpiastri 🤦 username lmao i love their dynamic

whosalidyah if only I didn't have exams

yourusername never leave me again, oscar and lando almost drove me insane whosalidyah igu next time babes🤞

username hope to see her at the paddock a lot more!

username oh to be y/n rn

username I could you tell where your head was at when I found you.

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Will You Be Mine?

1 year ago

Y/n was very excited for her date with the one and only Oscar Piastri, not like she hadn't gone on many with him before but he had said he had something very special planned which "fit her persona well", his words not hers. She was very suspicious seeing as basically all their dates filled her with joy and excitement, high standards to exceed, if she did say so herself.

She had gotten her nails painted prior to the date and had made sure her hair looked nice. She had also put on a pretty dress but not before playing dress up and have a whole fashion show in her room with A'lidyah. Her whole hype crew in one person, she was so blessed. While doing touch ups she heard the doorbell ring and practically flew downstairs to go and open the door.

Oscar stared down at her, his face leading her to think he was in a trance or something of the sort. Y/n loved the effect she had on him. She did a little twirl to show him the full fit knowing it would fluster him even more.

"Am I pretty enough for the occasion, Mr. Piastri?" Y/n said chuckling softly before leaving a mannequin like Oscar standing at the door in awe as she went to go grab her purse and let A'lidyah know it was time for her to go. She came back down and Oscar swore she looked like an angel descending from the heavens.

"Well, I'm waiting on an answer?"

"You are absolutely stunning, beyond pretty enough for the occasion, although those are definitely everyday qualities of yours."

"What a sweetheart!" Y/n said, once again teasing the man and taking pleasure in the blush that spread across his face, as she closed the door to the apartment and took Oscar's outstretched hand. As they made it to the car he opened the door for her and allowed her to enter before going around the car and getting in himself.

"Ouhh my favorite song is playing, did you orchestrate this or is the universe just working overtime?" The girl spoke softly in a joking manner.

"A magician can't reveal all his tricks." Oscar said jokingly before smiling softly at the girl in the passenger seat and taking in the joy that radiated from her being. They drove with soft music in the background and just the amazing scenery to guide them through the city. Once they got to the destination, which seemed like a garden of some sort, Oscar practically ran over to her side of the car. Once he had opened the door for her he covered her eyes with his hands.

"Oscar, your coordination better be on point because if I trip your days will be numbered." she said seriously with a hint of humor in her voice.

"Wouldn't be the first time you've fallen for me, now would it love?" Oscar teased as he walked her over to the romantic picnic spot he had set up for her.

"Girl, you know what... just don't be surprised when I jump you." Y/n said playfully. They then came to a stop and and Oscar uncovered her eyes allowing her to see the scene that he had put together. When Y/n saw the sign that said "Will You Be Mine?" her heart felt as though it would jump out of her chest. When she turned to face Oscar he got down on one knee and began to speak before she could say anything.

"From the moment I met you I knew that we would be inevitable. You're intricate but gorgeous hairstyles, your dough like eyes, and your beautiful aura had put me in an immediate trance and I remember thinking 'woah'. My friends once told me that when I looked at you it seemed as though stars had been placed in my eyes purposely as if to gaze upon you meant my pupils had seen an unknown galaxy deeply treasured by the cosmos. So, will you allow me a place in your heart in which I beg to stay for an eternity."

Y/n immediately broke down crying before saying yes a million times and jumping into Oscar's warm embrace.

"I will do my best to treasure your heart." Y/n said before pulling Oscar in for a kiss.

That night the stars danced above them as though rejoicing.

♫ Know life been lifin' lately, so I save you if you save me ♫

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Current Time

yourusername

liked by oscarpiastri, whosalidyah, and 479,502 others

yourusername I was over love, thought I had enough, then I found you @oscarpiastri

This posts comments have been limited to users mentioned

oscarpiastri I was no doubt, stressed out without you.

yourusername the only man ever🤭

oscarpiastri

liked by yourusername, landonorris, and 923,547 others

oscarpiastri All we got is us, when nobody does, I got you @yourusername

This posts comments have been limited to users mentioned

yourusername For your sanity and my mentality.

oscarpiastri mine, in every universe

yourusername omg I'm literally your biggest fan!!

oscarpiastri well I would hope so🤨

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♫ Man, I thought I had everything, I was lonely... Now you're my everything, now it's on me... ♫

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foone · 12 hours

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weird thought: I think if I was a teenager now (or anytime in the last decade or so) I think I would have written (and read!) a lot more fanfic than I did in reality, where I was a teenager in the 90s.

See, I've never been hugely into fanfic. Never had anything against it exactly, but it just wasn't something I was into. But I think that has to do with an interesting combination of how my brain works and what time I was first really getting into being a fan.

I've got a "librarian" brain (I'm literally typing this from within a library, WHERE I WORK). It wants to know things like "what are all the works in this series/by this creator?" and "are they all accessible?" and "what info is available about how it was made?"

I'm the kind of person who will watch a show then go look it up on wikipedia to see how many seasons it has, who made it, if they're still making it, check tvtropes for any more info, etc. Or I hear a song I like by a band I've never heard of, so I go listen to their entire discography while researching them. I just focus on things I'm into that way, you know? I don't half-ass my interest. (this is probably related to my autism, of course)

So what does this have to do with fanfic? like, do I go read some fanfics as part of this process? No, and I think the reason for it is when I specifically first got into fandom, as a teen.

See, this sort of fandom-librarian was harder to do in 1997, you know? You couldn't just pull up the wikipedia for that new show and see how many episodes it had. You also couldn't just listen to the whole discography of that band! Forget Spotify or Google Music, even Napster didn't exist yet.

So my interest in fandom focused a lot more on very basic questions: How many episodes/albums/books/whatever are there? Where can I see/hear them all? Like, I remember getting excited because I found some fan magazine that had a list of all the Star Trek: The Next Generation episodes. Just a list! Not even descriptions or anything. I finally could take that list and see how many I'd seen, so I'd know when I saw them all in late-night reruns.

So I'm focusing on these very basic parts of being a fandom-librarian and I stumble across some fanfic. I'm like "oh, is this a transcript of an episode I haven't seen yet?" and I realize it's not, it's a story written by a fan, and I get a knee-jerk reaction of "that's not helpful to my quest to know and find all the episodes". It's like I am on a quest for the holy grail and I found a fake cup. It's not helpful to me, and at worst it's a distraction from my goal.

And the thing is, I think the fact I had that reaction is entirely due to the time and situation in which I first encountered fanfic. It was in that environment of "I can't even find a list of the episodes, let alone a way to watch them all!" and that anxiety that colored my response to finding fanfic.

I think if I instead was first introduced to fanfic NOW, where those fandom-librarian drives aren't so difficult to fulfill, I'd be way more positive about fanfic. If I could get a list of episodes with a quick google search, and watch them easily on netflix/prime/whatever, I'd be less "THIS DOESN'T HELP! I AM STRUGGLING WITH THE BASICS HERE!" and more "yay, more content for the fandom I'm obsessed with!"

Like I said, I'm not anti-fanfic, I never have been, I just never got into it. From the beginning I had this reaction that was "this is not useful" and I never developed any real interest in it. Which is a shame, honestly. Fanfic is great. It just never became one of my interests, and while I've written it and read it from time to time, I imagine I'd be way more into it if I didn't have the weird reaction to it due to the worries of the time in which I first encountered it.

I don't know how many other people have brains that work anything like mine, but if they exist, I'm glad they're now growing up in a world where they won't have these problems. They can get into fanfic without this weird baggage caused by a lack of information.

#fanfic meta

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lets-try-some-writing · 3 days

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So I was brain-rotting about Transformers Prime, as one does, when I had a thought. What if the bots don’t have the Uncanny Valley? Cause the theory behind the Uncanny Valley is that something that looked human that wasn’t human existed. So our brains developed an entire biological response to detect it. Since the bots were all created by Primus, and thus don’t have many if any predators that can mimic them, they just…don’t have it. Which is a big reason why Makeshift was able to trick everyone that he was Wheeljack. Till Bulkhead found holes in his story of course. What do you think?

That's an interesting thought! I like it! However I do have my own thoughts to add here!

I don't think Cybertronians would lack an Uncanny Valley phenomenon. Rather, I believe they have it and the response shows itself differently. Spark Eaters, Ghouls, and the techno organic abominations of the Quintessons I think would instill a very deep set concern when it comes to potential infiltration. I personally am of the belief that they are VERY adept at picking out something that is not one of theirs. EM fields, facial expressions, and overall movement probably help in that regard. I imagine when two Cybertronians notice each other, it is a split second scan that tells them everything they think they need to know. Failure to meet the inbuilt specifications to qualify as Cybertronian would likely be met with extreme reactions. Violence I feel would be the most common form of reaction to anyone who feels too Cybertronian and yet not Cybertronian enough.

Too many times the children of Primus have been harmed through those who call themselves allies and mask themselves in forms similar to their own.

In fact, I think they would have a heightened sense of Uncanny Valley considering all the crap their species has been through and the many MANY species that hit a little too close to home biologically at times. (cough the quints and their stuff cough). On alien ships, if you want to pick out someone who Isn't Right And Feels Off, best send the resident Cybertronian. Their sense of Uncanny Valley can be trained to pick out other things that Feel Off and thus save their comrades the pain of potentially being hurt from within.

#transformers #maccadam #transformers prime #cybertronian biology #cybertronian worldbuilding

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supercalime · 3 days

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No one asked but I have a take haha.

I have zero problem with buck and eddie being an item, the biggest problem I have is their stans acting the way they are now with the current storyline with tommy.

I mean, I hate to break it to the b*ddie st*ns but you can think your friends are hot and like, not want to pursue them, whether you realize you’re queer or not. The fans are undermining so much of the current storyline that it makes me sad.

Im as aroace as one can be, but also I have eyes lol. I see hot/attractive people, I of course can admit that they are hot/attractive. It doesn’t mean that I want to be with them specifically sexually or romantically.

Also, figuring out your sexuality is confusing and weird. I definitely thought I had a crush on a friend solely because they were a person I got along with and spent a lot of time with and thought that was what I was supposed to do (by the time I thought I was allo).

What I mean is that it’s not always black and white when it comes to what attraction is.

Another thing, and this is pure speculation on my part: the actors are VERY aware of b*ddie and know that it’s one of the biggest reasons people keep watching the show, so they might keep on stirring the pot a bit in the interviews because they know it can create enough buzz for the show to trend and make the network/producers/investors keep renewing it so they can keep their jobs for as long as possible.

Im not saying b*ddie fans are delusional or anything like that but I am really disappointed how many of them (or at least a loud minority) is treating the canon ship as if it’s a stepping stone for another that has yet to be fully confirmed on screen. Sure there are signs in retrospect, but like I said, you can think someone is attractive without wanting to be with them.

This whole thing of buck having always been in love with eddie irks me a bit as it falls in a trope I don’t personally like (someone sticking around because they are pining over their friend the whole time and the friendship is a stepping stone to romance). I mean, if b*ddie happens and it’s done well, I’m all for it. What I really don’t want to happen is the trope I mentioned above. If it’s meant to happen, the best way in my opinion is for the two guys to develop those feelings with time, not it being a realization that they were in love the whole time. Heck, there are dcoms that did friends to lovers quite decently in the past and it wasn’t a “it has always been youuu” situation.

In conclusion, the only thing we gotta take is what is confirmed on screen, in canon. If we are supposed to listen to anyone talking about ships and storyline is Tim Menear and the other writers. And what has been confirmed so far by Tim is that Buck was jealous of Eddie being with Tommy because he was attracted to Tommy without realizing it. In canon so far, that’s what is happening and you have to accept that. The story is about Buck coming to terms with his bisexuality and him and Tommy being in a romantic relationship.

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scekrex · 2 days

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tw (depression)

hello would you be interested in writing about sinner!Adam becoming best friend with a touch averse kind of depressed male sinner!reader who works at the hazbin hotel (and is secretly touch starved) and then starting to have a crush on him cause he’s the only one who doesn’t want to kill him on sight and he’s able to babysit him and care for him without asking for anything in return. Maybe the friendship process and how Adam tries to flirt with him? Sorry for the wall of text and thanks

Okay so reader being touch starved is only heavily implied by Adam constantly touching him, hope that works! Also never apologize for being specific when it comes to requests - the longer the better <3 also his flirting is low-key awkward bc I headcanon Adam to not do well with rejection - especially when he's seriously interested in someone.

You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be

pairing: Adam x male!reader

warnings: language, mentions & symptoms of depression

note: not beta read bc fuck you I don't have beta readers

Adam hated everything down there in hell, from the hotel, over its residents all the way to Lucifer. He deeply hated every single sinner in this shithole and his heart longed for the safe walls of heaven that protected him from the filth. And the worst part was that he wasn’t even able to fully relax when he spent his days at the hotel, how could he when everyone wanted him dead - even Charlie, not that she’d ever admit let alone act on it.

But then there was you, a random guy Adam had never noticed before. He had not seen you during the battle, or maybe he had seen you and had just been too busy to focus on a sinner as unimportant as you. But now that he called the hotel his home, he was quite grateful for your company. Because while hell itself sucked and caused waves of tiredness and sadness to wash over him every now and then, you were the one that could get rid of those gray rain clouds for him. You weren’t a sunshine like Charlie, the exact opposite was the case. You had your fair share of problems to deal with, one of said problems was the fact that you suffered from depression - not that this illness would make you special or whatever, many people in hell suffered from it. Hell and depression sort of came in a package deal. Yet Adam made it a little easier to deal with - a thing you had never ever imagined you’d admit to.

A nice thing that came hand in hand with the friendship that grew between you and Adam was how touchy the first man was, he somehow had his hands on you constantly. When he’d walk past you he’d ruffle your hair, when you were sitting on the couch he would sit down next to you only to pull you in his lap and play with your hair. It was nice to have someone to cuddle with on a casual basis, though sometimes you longed for more, more than just friendship, something more intimate. But you weren’t sure if you had the energy for that.

Adam on the other hand longed for the same thing, he made it very obvious that he was interested in you, he would listen to your problems - or at least pretent to do so, because sometimes your problems were fucking boring in his eyes. But he’d hold you in his arms while you talked about things that kept you up at night, no matter if he was listening or not. And that alone seemed to help, at least Adam thought it did by the way you acted. And while the first man tried to act on the feelings he had for you, you made it quite hard for him to actually do so. “Y’know” he casually hummed as he headed towards the kitchen with you sitting on his shoulders. That was a thing you had talked him into at the beginning of your friendship, whenever you felt too tired to walk for yourself you’d ask him to carry you and usually he did so. Sometimes - though that rarely happened - he was too tired himself and would simply refuse to get up at all. “We should give this LuLu world bullshit a fucking try,” he continued as he headed for the fridge. You looked down onto him, a little confused by his statement. “Why?” Adam shrugged his shoulders, his hands grabbed a hold of your legs so you wouldn’t fall as he did. “Why the fuck not? It’s not like this shithole of a fucking hotel has anything to offer.” And while he had a point, you simply saw no reason to visit LuLu world. It was bright, loud and full of people, that didn’t sound very fun to you. “Pass, “ you mumbled as you opened the fridge and looked for something to eat, the brunette sighed loudly, “Fucking c’mon shithead, I’ll be fucking fun.” You shook your head though, “Been there once, it wasn’t fun at all.”The first man reached for a plate of ribs that you had prepared for him a couple hours ago and handed you a bowl of chocolate pudding, “If you say so.” And with that the topic was through and Adam had to come up with yet another idea to invite you on a date.

As Adam turned around to head back to his room he shrieked and backed off against the counter. Niffty was standing in the door frame to the kitchen, a little needle in her hand as she giggled at the sight of Adam. “Lemme down, I’ll put her away,” you mumbled with your mouth full of chocolate pudding and made grabby hands for the brunette to put you back on your own feet, the taller male that was carrying you on your shoulders though shook his head, “No fucking way I let you near that little bitch.” You however simply patted his hair and climbed off his shoulders yourself so that you could head over to Niffty and get that little gremlin out of the way. “Nif,” you hummed in a soft tone as you kneeled down next to the small demon, offering her a small smile. The redhead jumped up and down on the spot in excitement, teasingly pointing the sharp end of the needle in Adam’s direction. You were quick to take that weapon from her, “Nuh uh, I told ya we leave the big guy alone.” Adam raised an eyebrow at that, wondering when the fuck you had spoken to Niffty about anything that involved him, he could not recall a memory like that and therefore figured you must have done that without his knowledge. Kinda cute, that he had to admit. “Awww, but he looks so funny when I threaten him;” the small demon cried out in disappointment, clearly not happy with the decision you had made for her. “Doesn’t matter, he’s off the table Nif, we leave him be,” you explained once more and while not happy with that result, the redhead accepted her fate and took off.

“C’mere you fucking bitch,” the brunette mumbled and you were just about to ask him what he was talking about, but before you could his arms wrapped around your body and you were lifted onto his shoulders again, “Stay away from the fucking impure filth.” That earned the first man a slap on the back of his head and before he could open his mouth to complain you spoke, “I’m filth too, just as impure as the other cunts here.” Adam was quick to disagree,”No you’re fucking not, otherwise I wouldn’t fucking carry you around like you’re the most divine fucker God had ever created.” And while you wanted to argue, there was truly no point, so you simply decided to go along with his point of view.

“Also,” Adam whispered as he was heading back to his hotel room with you still on his shoulders, “That stunt of yours? Fucking badass.” In confusion you asked the brunette, “What stunt are we talking about?” He tapped your knee nervously as Husk walked past you, he waited until the bartender was gone before he responded, “Standing up to that demon bitch.” In reality it had been less impressive, but Adam liked the fact that you had talked to that little girl about leaving him alone and this was his way of saying thank you - it wasn’t a very good way, but that didn’t matter. “I didn’t stand up to her, I-” Adam interrupted you, his voice echoed through the empty hallway as his voice sounded louder than he had intended it to, “Just take the fucking compliment, for God’s sake.” - “Thanks,” you simply responded and gently patted his cheek as you playfully added, “Next time you can just call me hot, I can take compliments if they’re actually voiced as such.” And despite the fact that you weren’t able to see Adam’s cheeks heating up and turning red, you felt them heating up under your touch. “Shut the fuck up, I dunno what the hell you’re talking ‘bout,” he mumbled as he tilted his head downwards, you left this uncommented. If he needed time to admit to his feelings fully, you were okay with that. You have spent your entire afterlife in this hellhole, waiting for someone to save you. Now that a certain someone had arrived and was willing to save you, you were willing to wait for him. And while you did so, you would be able to work on yourself so that you would be ready for him when he decided to take the first step. “You are though,” the words of the brunette drowned your thoughts out and you looked down on him, a big question mark on your face as you asked, “What?” Adam sighed and rolled his eyes, “Hot, dipshit, you’re fucking hot.” Now that was sooner than you had thought he’d admit it out loud, but you took it as it came. “I’m aware,” you hummed, a proud smile on your lips as Adam entered his room and carelessly pushed the door close using his wing, “So are you.”

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel adam #adam x male reader #male reader #adam x y/n #adam x reader #adam x you

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drdemonprince · 14 hours

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Any chance you'd expand on the hank hill trans guy post? (Sorry, best indicator I could come up with.) The concept interests me as I decidedly know my maleness, yet don't feel impeded by for the most part, any male gendered norms/boxes. I am fairly masculine, though I rarely use those kinds terms to describe myself. I have found I often do stray outside of what society pushed for me when I transitioned, yet I again do not feel it has taken from my right to maleness whatsoever. I am just me, who happens to be male. I have had friends try and suggest I am NB adjacent but I do not feel this way whatsoever. I feel more people are outliers to gender expectation than we care to admit and it's disappointing the way cis-people deny that. Hope this wasn't too long winded, I value your writing and perspective, and wanted to hear more of your thoughts on this.

Yeah, well so many things all get conflated by gender labels, and it's all so personal, you know? Masculinity does not have to mean maleness, and a person's gender identity might be a reflection of some innate quality they experience themselves as having, or a general summary of their tendencies, or their desired presentation, or their sense of affinity with other people, or an interpersonal tool, or something they just go along with because it was given to them by society, or any other number of things.

I think my recent substack piece on detransition goes into this pretty well, and I have an upcoming piece of what @pastimperfection calls "bilateral dysphoria" that comes out next week that delves into it too.

I think I mostly saw taking on a male identity as a means to an end more than any kind of innate reflection of who I was, though I did feel an affinity with effeminate men for a lot of reasons. I think I also discounted how much I have in common with my fellow nonbinary people of all stripes, because that identity became so strongly associated with being an annoying type of queer person that everybody else just wrote off as ultimately being their assigned gender at birth anyway no matter how much they protested. it doesn't help that 'nonbinary' is a catchall term for literally thousands if not millions of very distinct experiences and desires.

transitioning gave me control over how i was perceived, finally, but hormones are a throttle that only go in one very specific direction, and you don't really have all that much control over which changes kick in at which times and what people will make of you once you do start registering to them as some identity other than what you were first saddled with. it's an incredible gift to be able to toggle that throttle. but it's limited, not because medical transition isn't incredible and needed for so many, but because there is no escaping the goddamned binary cissexist logic that influences everything about how people treat you, how you navigate institutions, who finds you desirable and what they want out of you, and so much else.

if you're able to cast a lot of the external societal bullshit aside and feel strong in your maleness, maybe you're stronger than me or maybe our orientation to these things is just different, i don't know. i was never all that sensitive to feedback that i was doing the whole being-a-woman-thing all that wrong. i reveled in violating those rules to an extent. succeeding at being a woman despite my best attempts was what felt super dysphoric. and now i guess im succeeding at being a man, insofar as im always read as one, and it feels just as uncomfortable and objectifying and false. i thought that with manhood i could probably just grit my teeth and deal with it, but i'm finding that i can't.

ive always been very open that for me, gender is a thing I Do, and i guess to those who know me well it wouldnt be surprising to hear that i have gotten tired of Doing Being a Man and dont feel like playing that particular gendered game anymore. I tend to get bored of things! and find the flaws in things. and find my comfort in being fault-finding and contrarian and not being a joiner. and thats okay. i learned a lot along the way. not having to try any more is a huge relief. i can just do whatever. and know actively that people will more often than not be wrong in what they make of me.

maybe it was natural feeling for you to decidely 'know' your maleness without a care for masculine standards because that is the right identity for you! and maybe i only feel secure in the "not knowing" realm and in letting go of what people think of me or finding any kind of tidy categorization for it because that's the right spot for me. for now. until i find a new interesting way to be unhappy and striving for more and different again. :) that's just part of being alive, for me.

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alieninvasionsarenotajoke · 3 days

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Everymanhybrid headcanons you have?

Ohmygod you have just opened pandoras box my friend and I thank you so much for it Before Slendy/The EMH channel: So I'd like to think all the boys met in Highschool with Jeff and Vinny meeting first and Evan joining the friend group around sophomore year. Evan gives me the vibes of an extrovert who adopted two introverts and never left them. He was also probably the one who introduced them to their other friends (Nick, Daniel, etc) and the rest is history !

They all like skateboarding, mainly Evan. He's the one who taught the other two how to with Vinny absolutely KILLING it and Jeff.... not so much.

This is less headcanon and more canon since Vinny and Jeff have guitars lying around. But they all play some sort of instruments and have definitely thought about making a band before. Jeff would be on the guitar, Vinny maybe the bass or keyboard, and Evan would go crazy as a drummer.

Speaking of which Vinny and Jeff give me big band kid energy. Mainly Jeff.

I can also see Vinny being a theater kid.

OH! Steph was homeschooled and chronically online (in a millennial way) because of it. This lead her into so many fandoms and she wrote so much cringe fanfiction. Some she wouldn't even let Evan see.

Also Steph is really into 2000s animated MTV shows and kinned Pheobe from Downtown.

One more thing about Steph because I love her and I'm 100% not projecting onto her ;D She loves mindless self indulgence, she wants revenge, and modest mouse. I feel like Vinny and her bonded over music, especially Modest Mouse.

After slendy/emh channel: Vinny is a very big Modest Mouse fan, like listened to all the albums and probably knows the bandmembers names and lore. His favorite album is "The Moon and Antarctica" which became a comfort album during his time living with Habit. He listened to "Alone down there" over and over because it reminded him of his friendship with Evan.

Sidenote if you haven't listened to "The moon and antarctica" you really should cause most of the songs give me EMH vibes. Especially Alone Down There and Tiny Cities made of Ashes. I honestly want to make a analysis on that album and how it fits with EMH, but that's for another time. :D Back to headcanons. Habit loves frustrating boardgames like monopoly or uno. Mostly because he feeds off the emotions. When Vinny lived with Habit, he would always bug him about playing Monopoly specifically. Vinny gave in one time and played for a bit until he realized Habit was somehow cheating.

Habit also ate the pieces in front of Vinny as a power move.

He also likes how metal tastes.

Habit might have pica.

That's all for now because if I go on any longer I'd start writing a whole ass book. If you'd like more headcanons I'd be glad to post some cause I have plenty !! Sorry if anything here is confusing I'm bad at putting thoughts into words sometimes XD

if you've read this far, here have an Evan:

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henrysglock · 2 days

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You Speak Basic, Doc?

So. As a follow up to this post about the 2.08/2.09 HNL lights, I want to talk about something Wilbur just brought up in the server:

Very good fucking question. Why did he leave? And how did he end up in the stairwell that leads down to the basement?

Specifically, it's the same stairwell Bob just went down to reset the breakers and take the lab off lockdown:

(Which also, coincidentally, seems to be the same one El runs down in NINA to get to Henry and the tunnel out of the lab)

So...okay, cool. He was on his way to or from the basement after having left his little safe space in the upstairs security room.

That, however, brings me to another question: What is there for Owens to do in the basement?

Bob, as I said, went down there to reset the breakers and unlock the doors, because when the power cuts in HNL, the doors all lock. It's a lockdown.

So really...what else is there to do in the basement, besides no-scope demodogs and go "ooh" at the weird, pulsing mega-pussy gate? Owens doesn't have a gun, and he's been staring that weird, pulsing mega-pussy gate in the face for like a year now. Which means...it's probably not that.

So...could he have been trying to reinstate the lockdown by flipping the breakers Bob had fixed?

Well. Let's think about the "why"s of that.

First off, Owens knows firsthand that a lockdown isn't going to do shit against the demodogs.

A) The tunnels already allow them to circumvent the lab exits. Owens is aware of said tunnels.

B) The demodogs can smash through polycarbonate. Owens literally sees one do so.

So they could easily just tear right through any doors in their path. A lockdown makes no sense...for creatures.

No. Lockdowns are primarily for humans.

In fact...If I had to bet, the lockdown protocol in HNL has to do with the whole "keeping people from escaping the child torture basement" thing we see in ST4.

But...the prison-basement ended with El in 1983, right? So the question remains: What would Owens be locking down in the basement, and why hide his reasons for going downstairs?

Unless, of course, the prison-basement didn't end in 1983. And, of course, unless there's something worth securing down there that we're not yet privy to.

And along those lines: Why are so many demodogs staying in HNL? Why concentrate in the lab, when the tunnels will take them anywhere under Hawkins in pursuit of Will? There were more than enough to spread out and search. If it was about guarding the gate against El, they'd just leave some at the entrances, or swarm wherever she happened to be (which is where Will is, coincidentally). I thought Vecna could read minds even without an open gate. If he's supposedly involved in this...then why not just swarm the Byers house? Why still concentrate in the lab after they find out where Will is?

That is to say...what are they looking for, specifically in HNL, after they've found out that Will's left the building?

TL;DR: Owens...there wasn't someone down there that you needed to lock down, right? Someone to be retrieved later? Someone the democreatures might have a vested interest in finding?

#sam owens #st2 speculation #henry creel #<- not explicitly mentioned but definitely implied

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tumatawa · 2 days

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Messily written trans Laios headcanons(?). My sense of vocabulary has gone kaput... I couldnt make it a comic but I drew one of the bullet points as a garnish

-Taken just fine by his parents since he seemed like a more suitable heir than Falin. Given father's old clothes but couldn't stand to borrow Falin's outerwear because it felt like he was stealing < she doesnt GAF

-The village chief neglected to tell anyone about his children's personal lives as he only keeps to himself and doesn't often appear with his family. There weren't many people (including children) Falin and Laios frequently socialized with either, so neighbors mainly chalked the sudden change up to misremembering them.

-Raised very traditionally as a man though in a more reserved manner due to his father's nature, who could only take from his own personal experiences. While it should feel gratifying on the surface, it all vaguely felt as if he was trying to bury something. Such an approach harbored feelings of guilt as Laios thought he was being "ungrateful", and tried to focus on the opportunity to find a place for himself and Falin. In later years, he'd find many aspects of masculinity and gender roles presented to him by his peers too arbitrary compared to monsters.

-By the time he's settled with Falin he's given the time to take things at his own pace and actually address his trans identity as it felt widely overlooked. Only tape-binds in the dungeon. In any other case he does not often use it. Does not fit into any specific binary. Can only be described by his own definition. It isn't "like" anything. No op. Will always keep the "older brother" title. Shortly after he starts opening up about his passion he'll have to uncover his nagging discomfort of wanting to transform into something else entirely.

#Although the transmasc hc is fairly popular Ive never really seen anything too in depth for it. I think its really interesting #how that would play out in his life and in the world itself. I like the idea of it not being initially freeing/liberating.#I hold close the concept of dealing with further (maybe even worse) inner turmoil post-transition now that you can tackle other things #^Related or unrelated to gender identity/presentation #Resolution at the end is always satisfying but it would be fucking crazy if the cogs finished turning in the early-middle half

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cowboyinternist · 2 days

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what makes sam and jackie compelling/interesting as a ship to u? /gen :O (not related to anything ive been meaning to send u this ask for a while and only just got round to it lol)

i think a big part of it is that the way jackie talks about sam makes them a lot more interesting as a character?

because objectively, sam sucks! as we see them about 90% of the time, they’re incredibly self serving and negligent. and that’s putting it in as simple terms as possible.

but we get these small implications as time goes on that there’s something beyond that! which is most notable in the interaction they have with dana in episode 83 (another thing i could talk about for a million years (i could also go on a whole other tangent about how them showing their face is another really huge example of this but that’s off topic rn)). but none of them are necessarily set in stone, outright saying who they are. like MAYBE sam isn’t completely horrible, but who can really be sure?

but then Jackie says this in it devours,

sam is nice! really nice, actually! outside of the specific context of them being the sheriff and instead them,,, fundamentally as a person. and it isn’t like jackie is this one off character whose judgment we can’t trust. we spend an entire book getting to know her! and i feel like jackie is reliable in this aspect, especially post novel 1. this is the first and really like,, ONLY time we get info on sam from somebody who actually knows them personally. and interestingly enough, the next time we get insight on this aspect of their character, it can be linked back to jackie. they only decide to stand up against the university of what it is once they threaten josh, who is jackie’s half brother. and it is IMMEDIATE they are,, FRONT and fucking center in that movement. like their relationship is so interesting because jackie saying something as simple as that shakes up everything we know about this character.

and this all makes it very interesting to explore just,, what makes sam so fucking horrible outside of that? like what is it that drives them to be that way. and there are so many possible answers to that question and i have my own extensive thoughts on that but again,, off topic.

i love it all so much because it plays into the major themes of perspective that wtnv has? which i think is my favorite thing about the podcast. cecil has his own perception of sam, so does dana, so does jackie. and none of those perceptions are necessarily false, because they’re based on those people’s individual experiences.

also i enjoy the way their relationship is foreshadowed in the novel because i think that with the way she describes it, sam is like the LAST character you’d expect her to end up with lmao.

but yeah TLDR; i find them compelling because sam is absolutely awful and jackie is not, but she describes them as a really nice person anyways ^-^

#tysm for asking!! i’ve been wanting to talk about this :3 #i was gonna put a cut on this but no… in 2024 we are irritating….#they’re also both just really weird but in different ways which is funny #number one obscure wtnv ship in my heart #i think what sams character gets reduced to a lot in the fandom is like. their weird art shit and their ~opinions~ on desert bluffs?#but they literally have not done the art thing since episode 93 (EIGHT YEARS AGO)#and they have implied (really implied) character development on the desert bluffs thing #guys they’ve done other bad things too okay 🙄#idk they’re very multifaceted.#also this is mostly unrelated but i’m SO UNBELIEVABLY UPSET that sam won’t be in the live recording for the attic #like i was so so so excited i was gonna analyze the fuck outta that #it’s okay though #wtnv #welcome to night vale #sheriff sam #jackie fierro

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wardingshout · 4 months

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Family for day 6 of SpeSilverWeek! Edition uuh found biological and crime I guess...

#this was the first one I completed tbh and I'm not vibing but it was rly good warmup and tbh working lineless is so much easier...#I get lazier and messier concerning anatomy esp and stuff but I have fun...#spesilverweek #pokespe silver #pokespe blue #pokespe #my art #the thing about this is. I have so many thoughts about this one very specific rocket au where they aren't dex holders but find Giovanni #instead but he still goes missing and they still kind of hate team rocket bc the whole mask of ice thing still happened so they try to fuck #shit up from within now that giovanni is gone even though they also rly just kinda want him to return and deal with stuff himself #and the admins have these rly fun roles of all being in disagreement on what to do #like the boss might be dead his kids should take over or we Must find the boss or lol no boss my team rocket now #and then the dex holders get mixed in too and it's Fun bc everyone is fighting everyone #also sorry Giovanni for making you look like that #it's like 5min til day 6 technically but my laptop is being a butt so in case it won't turn on tomorrow here it is now #I will not wait 5min for midnight I got a new pillow for christmas and I wanna SLeep on it noW! hell yeah !!#pokemon

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supercalime · 2 days

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I can’t believe I found people who think about this the exact same way as I do. I don’t get these hardcore buddie stans who suddenly try to make it look like buckTommy shipper are the toxic ones. I haven’t seen a single BuckTommy shipper who was rude without a reason (maybe a bit defensive about their CANON ship). Whereas I’ve seen plenty of incredibly toxic buddie stans who insult everyone who doesn’t ship their ship or share their opinions.

Another thing and don’t get me wrong Im not defending anyone. But I’ve seen many people heavily bullying the marisol actress because she’s apparently homophobic (not saying she isn’t or is) and wanting her to be gone beacause of this reason but totally ignore the alleged racism of ryan (again not saying he is racist or not, i dont know them personally) just because he is part of their beloved ship. By their logic Ryan should leave the show too.

Hey anon, it took me some time to answer your ask (chaotic life stuff lol) but I’m glad to finally have time to talk about this first part with you.

I’ll preface by saying I won’t get involved in actor drama, no matter how true or toxic it is because I don’t have enough information nor am I qualified to talk about the issues they mishandled. I’ll just say that, no matter who does bad things, they should be held accountable.

Okay, back to the main point: yes, it’s very strange how b*ddie st*ns are behaving towards the canon bi!buck thing. Both with people who ship bucktommy but also with the creators and actors on the show. Regardless if they are right or not about b*ddie being canon, this is not how you act with entertainment, specially with the people giving the content.

I hate to bash but it looks and sounds a lot like a toddler throwing a tantrum because they didn’t get a specific toy.

And toddlers only throw tantrums because they are brand new humans who are learning how to behave. They don’t know any better so they react with outbursts and repeated demands because it’s the only way they know to get the attention of the person taking care of them.

If I’m not mistaken, the main audience for the show is 18-45. NO ONE here should be yelling in comment sections “we want buddie! we want buddie! we want buddie!” as if they would immediately get it. It’s not how it works and it’s frankly embarrassing to see a bunch of adults acting like that for everyone to see.

And I can’t stress it enough, I’m not putting myself on a high ground here and saying I’m a better person by shipping bucktommy, as I’m sure there might be a percentage of fans out there being rude and annoying as well. But at least I’m keeping my conscience clear by not acting like me shipping two characters is something big enough in my life to ruin my enjoyment of a whole show in case my favorite ship doesn’t become canon.

I hate how fandoms behave as if they can have control over the content they are consuming. We aren’t entitled to anything and if there is supposed to be ANY discourse about which character was supposed to end with, that should happen AFTER the show ended! The story isn’t over yet! So why are b*ddie st*ns so stressed? If a show is making you this angry and demanding, please step aside a little, give it some distance because that’s not how consuming content is supposed to make you feel.

And I say that last part with sincerity because I too got way too involved with fandom discourse in the past, to the point that I had to distance myself from certain shows because being that involved made me upset.

Im just tired at this point you know. Im trying to protect myself as much as possible. Im not in the bird app, I don’t follow the show or the actors on social media, im avoiding interviews like the plague. All I want from this experience is to watch the show, gather my thoughts, form my opinions, log onto tumblr and reblog the cute stuff I see about my favorite ship without having to worry about whatever the hell is going on outside my pretty little bubble

#lety rambles #ask #911 #911 abc #bucktommy #tevan #firefly #firepilot

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