#that’s my protocol for when I don’t like someone’s opinion | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

imkillerbae · 1 year

Note

Heya! Thank you for adding some fanfictions to the thread, it's so empty recently.

How about something with Sova? Could be anything of your choice.

Heyooo!!!! THanks for requesting and sorry if this took so long to make.

And you're welcome! I'm glad I could contribute to the simping.

I LOVED writing this and had so many ideas. But I settled for something fluffy ehehe self indulgent stuff. anyway, here's Sova being a simp, cool reader, God mi heart. This is my most favorite one that i've wrote probably. Enjooy!!!

Say So (Valorant Sova x Fem!Reader)

Summary:

Sova’s artificial eye is acting up, and he needs help with it. Sage knows nothing about biocomponents, and the two young engineers were too experimental, so he approaches Y/N, also someone with artificial parts, for help.

Words: 2k

CW: Slow burn, FLUFF, lots of blushing, Sova the Shy bear, lots of inner monologue from him. just lots of fluffiness.

(Please listen to Avenue Beat's cover of Say So, originally by Doja Cat, while reading this.)

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🎶 Why don’t you say so? 🎶

Sova held this eye pain in for a while now. He didn’t like the idea of anyone tinkering with his artificial eye, but this was getting too painful.

He was reading ‘We’ by Zamyatin when it just busted on him, giving him a small jolt of electricity in the head. He felt that the thing was in some sort of disrepair, but he didn’t like asking for help with something so sensitive. Clearly, he made a mistake. Since this thing is so close to the brain, he might just deal with a lot more than a nonfunctioning eye. He sighs. He should’ve just asked for help.

Another hindrance was who to ask for help.

His choices were Sage, Raze and KJ, or Y/N.

He respected Sage for her skills in the healing arts but he couldn’t expect too much from her when it comes to eyes made of metal and wires. Plus his history with her? A can of worms he’d never want to open again. As for the two—Raze and KJ—he tried asking for their opinions and he was met with crazy ideas for modification and improvements, things he didn’t necessarily need. Plus, he’s not too fond of the idea of them fiddling with his eye for their own scientific curiosity.

That leaves Y/N.

Y/N was the obvious choice. She really was. She was skilled with biocomponents, she was easy to talk to, kind, generous, perfect. But there was a huge problem.

Sova has a crush on her. Was it called a crush? Do crushes even apply at their age? Point was, he liked her. And he was shy about it.

Y/N was an agent in the protocol who was similar to him, in a sense that she also had some robotic parts to her, namely her arm. The robotic components started from her shoulder, all the way to her fingertips. She was skilled with repairs of that nature. Along with Sage, she was also a medic for the team, both human and non-human. She was the obvious choice.

🎶 It’s been a long time since you, fell in love~ You ain’t coming out your shell, you ain’t really been yourself~ 🎶

Sova was just very shy, it was pathetic. Normally, he never really had any problem telling people what he felt. He openly says I love you all for god’s sakes. But whenever he was with her, he can pretend to play it cool but sometimes he’d zone out staring at her or just stutter on his words. His brain would just be filled with her, in scenarios he’d made in his head. Like how he would take care of her, marry her, take her to his Babushka, all that cheesy stuff. He wasn’t like this normally but his heart just beats faster than a machine gun could fire. He blushed at the thought every time he imagined spending the rest of his life with her. It didn’t help that he looked extremely serious whenever he was thinking.

He sighed. He needed to gain some confidence with her if he ever wanted a chance. Or at the very least, get this eye of his in proper order.

Getting to her door was easy peasy. Knocking was another deal. He stood there quietly with his fist raised, ready to knock, but no sound was emitted. Usually he rehearsed what he needed to say beforehand, but it seems like he couldn’t get his head straight this time.

It’s not that complicated to ask for repairs Sasha. Stop hesitating, he scolded himself. You’re not asking her to a date, you’re asking her to fix your eye. Stop overthinking, it’s not going to happen.

As he was about to knock, his thoughts were interrupted by Breach who was on the other side of the door as it opened. “Oh! Sova! Aye, great to see ya! But I gotta bolt! Thanks Y/N for the advice, haha!” He said immediately, waving at Y/N then at a confused Sova, although you would never be able to tell from his face. As he moved past Sova, Breach muttered “g’luck pal”, but neither Y/N or Sova heard it.

Sova stood outside the door, unblinking at Y/N who had her protection glasses on. “Hello,” she greets, gracefully placing the screwdriver on her desk. She smiles gently, her heels tapping lightly on the floor as she walked closer. The entire room was humming with electricity and the steady air from the vents, but he could hear his heartbeat clearly.

🎶 If you want it, scream it, shout it babe~ 🎶

He clears his throat, dusting his shoulders off. “It seems that I would’ve interrupted something had I knocked a little too early,” he starts, looking at the door, and then at her. He looked at her as discreetly as he could. She was in a white coat, casual clothes underneath. She adjusted the coat to her shoulders before speaking. “Not necessarily, Breach and I were just talking about his arms. He thought I’d be the best at tinkering with that.”

Concentrate Sova. Speak. Speak.

“I concur.” He replies, looking around the room, just anywhere other than her. He was sweating under his shirt, thank God he was wearing white. “So, what brings the big Russian teddy bear into my humble cave?” She teases with a laugh, pulling on his sleeve, beckoning him to walk closer to her walk table. She was professional most of the time, which he appreciated greatly, but it seems that she enjoys making him blush.

He blushes at the nickname, but he holds his breath to deafen the beating of his heart. “I-I’d like to ask for help with my eye. I can’t see anything from it right now, and it hurts.” He explains, leaning on her work table. She pauses for a moment, staring at him, then her expression changes to that of annoyance. “It’s not supposed to hurt. Since when has this been going on?”

“More or less a week. I thought of fixing it myself, which was a mistake.” He admits, ashamed, and she sighs. A hand lands on her hips and she leans on one side giving him an unsatisfied look. “Sova you don’t fiddle with your own eye, artificial or not. You know this. And for a week? This could be serious.” Her shoes tap impatiently against the floor.

Sova scratches the back of his head sheepishly then gives a meek smile. “It was foolish of me to think that it would pass. I’m sorry.” And with that, her expression softens to that of concern. She then reaches for latex gloves on the table pulling it over each hand. “Sit on the table so you’re on my eye level. I need to take a look at that before I pull it out of your eye socket.”

He looked at himself from the distant mirror. He was wearing a white shirt that fit snug enough to show his bulky shape, and dark green combat pants with lots of pockets on them. He fixed his blonde hair, combing it back. Y/N was watching as he did this, and she giggles to herself. She didn’t take him for someone who’s very concerned with his appearance.

“Alright big man. Lean in and let’s see what’s happening here,” she advices to him as she placed herself between his legs, holding a small flashlight with one hand. Sova furrows his brows but hesitantly complies. “Closer,” she says sharply, and he could feel her minty breath on his lips right now. He was looking to the side as she spread his eyelid open, his eye shaking.

“Look at me,” she whispers, too focused to care about him turning into a tomato, at the mercy of her hands. He then looks into her eyes, saying nothing but feeling everything in his chest.

When they first met, they easily got along. He was generally supportive of everyone, but he always found himself speaking positively about her more than anyone else. She was a team player like him, making use of his intel to clear areas as he watches her back. She’d saved him in the battlefield countless times, he knows he can depend on her with no fail. And his most favorite thing about her is her kindness and positivity. It was something he and the rest of the team needed.

As he thought about all of these things, Y/N repeated her question. He didn’t hear it the second time. “Huh?” He asked again, and Y/N’s eyebrows furrow, chuckling. “I asked if it hurt when I touch this,” she pressed on the side of his sclera, and he finally winces. “Slightly,” he whispered, looking away again and blinking.

🎶 Boy stop playin’ 🎶

“Why are you acting like you’re shy?” She smiles at him, tilting her head to one side, biting her lip. His breath became shallow as they stared at each other’s eyes, in comfortable silence. It felt like a moment was forever before she cleared her throat. “I’ll take that eye from you now, Sova.” She chuckles again.

Getting the eye off of him was not as painful as he would’ve thought, the numbing cream helped. Apparently static electricity damaged it. It was designed to be impervious to static electricity but alas, accidents happen. The inside of his eye looked fine minus the minor bruising, and she reassured him that seeing his eye like this didn’t bother her at all. “Sova I’ve dug out bullets from your shoulders with my fingers, don’t act like seeing your healed eye is something I’m not used to.”

As she worked, they talked about anything and everything that came to mind. How their day had been going, how was work, how was home. The conversation never seemed to end with the both of them.

“So, here’s what I’m advising. Take these anti-biotics every 6 hours, make sure you’ve eaten before though. I’m out of stock on the eyedrops but I’ll let you know when I have them again. In the meantime, stop touching it and make sure your hands are clean,” she slaps on his hand playfully, and he just huffs, the corner of his lips tugging slightly upward. “Thank you, Y/N. You are… wonderful.” He breathes out the compliment, smiling to himself.

🎶 Why you beatin’ round the bushn’~ 🎶

She returned his smile and crossed her arms. “You always say that. But thanks,” she shrugged, leaning on the wall, standing across him as he remained sitting on the table. He grits his teeth.

“I mean it. You are.”

“Yes. I know you mean it.”

“Y-you’re very wonderful. Kind, and beautiful. You smell great.”

“Uhuh? Thanks… haha.”

God what was this sudden urge to… to speak up? He didn’t know why but he needed to close this distance. It was gnawing at him. He couldn’t let this moment, this chance slip by him. He had to seize it. He internally fought the urge to chicken out and took a deep breath.

🎶 Knowin’ you want all this woman, never knock it till you try~ 🎶

He suddenly stood up and walked towards her, and she jolted upward out of instinct, one hand on her chest. He was a hunter after all, he could be intimidating. But everyone who knew him would say otherwise.

“I was wondering if you’d want to… come with me sometimes. I know a good place for coffee, we could come by after you take inventory of supplies. I think I could be of use in that department.” He asked spontaneously, his mouth stuck in a half smile as he realized what he’d said.

Y/N’s mouth was open, her eyebrow raised in shock. She was fighting the urge to laugh at his proposal. That was sudden, she thought. “W-wait, wait, are you asking me out? For coffee?” She asked, eyebrows furrowed and smile suppressed. He cleared his throat and looked around.

“Yes, I thought it would be a great idea to repay you for all of the help you’ve given me, digging out bullets from my flesh and all.” And with that, her room was filed with laughter, her laughter, a sound he’d come to love. “Yes, of course, I’ll take that offer. And maybe you’d like to show me some of the photographs you’ve taken of Russia? I’d love to see them.” She giggled, holding on his arm and squeezing gently.

His eyes widened. He was elated that she said yes that he almost didn’t hear her request. “When we both have free time, I’d like to take you there myself. My babushka makes great pastries.” He chuckles, his cheeks dusted with pink. Her hand trailed upwards from his elbow to his shoulder, then it settles on his cheek. Caressing it slightly, she then pinches it between her fingers, tugging. He winces.

“Let’s do the coffee thing first. Then we’ll talk about the second date.” She rolls her eyes teasingly. God he was on cloud 9 right now. He was confident that she’d say yes, but he was overthinking things. He should’ve just done this way earlier. “I’ve been meaning to ask you out for a long time now…” he admits, scratching his cheek with his finger. She then chuckles back.

“I’d let you had I known it. Why don’t you say so?”

#valorant sova #sova x reader #valorant sova x reader #valorant imagines #valorant #valorant headcanons #valorant sova imagines #valorant sova oneshot #valorant oneshots #valorant oneshot #sova #fanfiction #valorant fanfiction #messages #requests

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corn-fanfiction · 7 months

Text

SAVIOUR COMPLEX (Mark Hoffman x F!Reader) (PT. 7)

(PT. 6)

Rated: M

TAGS: language/past abuse/Mark Hoffman being a c*p/reader's life is maybe becoming less normal/Mark is protective bc it's his job but he's also problematic/because he's a c*p/Detective Gibson is his own tw/kissy kissy

**NOTE: Hey guys. Thank you so much for interaction with this fic, and I’m seeing a lot of new followers. I love that!! But I really need to stress right now how I do not support/endorse C*stas M*ndylor as a person or his opinions. He’s racist and I enjoy and only enjoy Mark Hoffman’s character. If you are a C*stas Stan, I highly encourage you to maybe cease interacting with this fic.**

“To say that this looks bad is an understatement.”

Mark scoffs and paces the Chief’s office.

“Don’t be dramatic.”

“No, let’s go over everything that’s happened tonight. You breach protocol by taking your case out on a date, you bring her to an active crime scene where her boyfriend has just died in a Jigsaw trap, and you are in the FBI’s sights! How is that dramatic?”

“Ex.”

Chief is stunned, baffled and befuddled. “Excuse me?”

“Ex boyfriend.”

“Are you-“ Chief sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose in exasperation. “You’re pulling my leg, right? This is a joke. This has to be a joke because I know you're not this stupid.”

“Watch it.”

“No, fuck it. You’re off her case and you’re suspended until I can figure out what the fuck to do with you. Turn in your badge and gun.”

Mark stares him down. He doesn’t move.

“Do it, or we’re gonna have a scene.”

Mark grinds his teeth, his jaw ticks. He’s holding air that he refuses to sigh away as he slams his sidearm and his badge down on the Chief’s desk.

“Who’s my replacement? I assume whoever it is has her next door in interrogation, right?”

“Questioning.”

“Don’t fucking split hairs with me right now.”

Before the Chief has a chance to respond, the heavy metal doors to the interrogation hall open and close. Mark throws the office door open and sees you passing. He gives you a comforting hand but then leaves when he hears a snort from Gibson. He turns on him and Gibson either isn’t expecting it or doesn’t think Mark will actually put hands on him. On both fronts, he’s wrong, because Mark grabs him by his collar and holds him with shaking arms.

“What the fuck is your problem, Gibson!?”

Gibson pushes Mark’s arms from his chest and shoves him. Not hard enough to hurt, but hard enough to send the message.

“I’m doing my job, Hoffman. Don’t forget, you’re a suspect too, and in danger of ‘reassignment’. Right?”

Gibson huffs and adjusts his shirt. Mark points a finger at his chest.

“You better keep your nose outta things before something happens to it.”

“Is that a threat?”

Mark is about to let him know that yes, it is a threat, when he feels a hand on his arm. He whips around and there you are, staring up at him with empty, dark eyes that are pooling with tears. God, you look ragged, traumatized- you are.

“Mark, come on, please. Please, let’s just go home. Please.”

He softens at your plea. He’ll do anything for you right now, and that includes walking away from this fight. He gives Gibson a final mean look and guides you out of the station and takes you home.

Now, he’s staring out the window of your bedroom as you’re curled against him in sleep, one arm tucked under your head and the other draped across you. He realizes that he probably shouldn’t have even brought you here, but rather have taken you back to his place. You need familiarity, sure, but whoever had been stalking you could still be after you.

That was something else you didn’t know. When you and Mark had arrived on the scene and he saw Ted’s body, it was apparent that it wasn’t…fresh. Of course, he knew that Gibson had to have shown you the photos but there’s no way you were in a state to notice that detail. And it looked like more than a couple days. The death was old…older than the day someone showed up outside your window.

He pulls you closer. Not only is someone imitating Jigsaw- him, not only had that person killed Ted, but they were likely the one stalking you.

It isn’t far fetched to think there’s another Jigsaw copycat; after all, that’s how he got the gig. The difference is that John and Amanda are both dead, and neither of them can handle this so Mark can focus on you. Mark racks his brain to shake loose any possible suspects. Everyone with any hand near Jigsaw is dead except him…and Jill. Christ, what if this is all Jill? Jealous because he has you and she has no one?

But Jill doesn’t have the physical strength to manage this on her own, and Mark’s watched her long enough to know she lives a solitary life. So no, Jill may be possible, but highly unlikely.

It has to be someone you know, or someone who knows him and his feelings towards you. It would be too large a coincidence for it to be a random copycat.

Who? Who?

The good news is that if he's suspended, he has plenty of time to find out.

There’s a banging on the door the next morning. You immediately jump and press your back to the headboard. Mark stands, reaches for his gun and then curses when he remembers he turned it in the night before.

You look up at him in a panic and he raises a calming hand. He glances at the window- nobody there. Goes down the hall and grabs a knife from the kitchen.

A peek out the front window reveals Gibson at the door, tapping his foot, looking around, checking his watch. Mark curses and opens the door, subtly setting the knife on the kitchen counter.

Gibson stops, looks Mark up and down, then cracks a smile.

“Jesus. Wasted no time, I see.”

Mark scowls and his grip on the door tightens. “Careful, Gibson. There’s no cameras here.”

Gibson looks over Mark’s shoulder and into the apartment.

“She around?”

“Yes, she’s in bed, and very fucking traumatized from the shake-down you gave her. That make you feel big, Gibson? Harassing a woman who’s being stalked and just saw her ex-boyfriend murdered?”

“Just doing my job. You know all about that.”

Before Mark can get another word out, you come up behind him, now having donned some pants and a cardigan.

“Detective Gibson. What a…well, whatever it is. What do you need?”

Gibson smiles at you, self-satisfied.

“I’m taking over your case. And with the recent danger, we think it’s best we put you in a safe house.”

Your eyes widen and you push your way past Hoffman who puts a hand on your shoulder. You shrug him off.

“Fuck that! You and your precinct already upheaved my life with this protection bullshit, now you wanna take me away from my job, my apartment? And for what? Jigsaw very clearly has no problem with me!”

“Yeah. Wonder why that is.”

Mark watches as you turn red.

“Besides, not like you’re leaving much behind.”

Mark barely has time to grab you when you lunge for Gibson, who leans away with a chuckle.

“Easy. I can always still take you in by force.”

“Fuck off, no you can’t,” Mark bites. “She can deny if she wants to.”

“Yeah, but that don’t look too good either, does it? Got a reason to stay away from the police?”

“Aside from the fact they’re batting 1,000 when it comes to harassment?”

Gibson looks from you to Mark.

“You don’t seem to mind too much.”

“That’s it-”

Mark is out the door before you can stop him and he slugs Gibson in the jaw. The younger detective stumbles back into the yard and Mark looms over him.

“Get the fuck outta here. And unless you have a warrant, you can tell the chief to shove this whole thing up his ass.”

Gibson stands and spits some blood into the grass.

“Your ass is out, Hoffman. You hear me? You’re fucked!” Gibson shouts and returns to his cruiser, stepping into the driver’s seat and retrieving his walkie-talkie. You run out to get Mark.

“Mark, what the fuck?!”

Mark sighs, shakes out his hand, turns to you. “I’m sorry. I- I can’t stand that prick. He was asking for it.”

“Yeah, no kidding! He was egging you on and you gave him exactly what he wanted. You could lose your job!”

“Nah,” Mark says, shaking his head and heading back inside. You follow him.

“Yeah.”

“I’ll have a word with the Chief, pay some penance, do crossing duty or something for a few weeks. Shit like this happens all the time.”

Mark goes to your freezer and grabs a bag of peas to cradle against his knuckles. When he faces you again, you’re leaning against the counter, chewing on your lip, staring at the imitation marble.

“What?” he inquires.

“Nothing.”

“No, what are you thinking?”

He watches as you splay your hand against the countertop, moving your fingers back and forth. He moves to stand next to you, moves his head to be closer to yours. Nudges you.

“Come on. Let me in.”

You sigh. “I don’t know what’s happening anymore. I don’t think I’m in danger. Or maybe I am. I don’t really care. But…maybe it’s best if we took a break? Just until the dust settles?”

Mark’s heart plummets into his gut and his eyes search yours, his head unmoving.

“You want that?”

“No. No, I really don’t. But I’ll be fine, and you can’t lose your job.”

Because it’s all I have.

Well, that was before he had you.

“Let Gibson take over my case. Once it dies he’ll get bored, I bet. I’m willing to wait.”

You finally meet his eyes and your hand finds his on the counter.

“What if I’m not?” he mutters, his lips so close to yours.

“I mean, I never really pegged you for a patient man. But…”

It’s like you can’t help yourself. Your lips come up to meet his and his hand gently cups your jaw.

Another kiss. One deeper and warmer. Before there can be a third that leads to something more, you pull away and Mark sighs.

“Maybe it’ll die out fast, you know?”

Mark nods at the refrigerator.

“Maybe.”

“Hey,” you say, tilting his face towards you. “Look at me. It’ll be fine. Distance and fondness and all that.”

“I don’t think I can get any fonder, honestly.”

He watches in pain as your eyes flutter through that small confession and a smile pulls at your lips.

“Well, just hold on to it, then. And phones exist, you know?”

He dips down for a kiss on your cheek.

“So do midnight rendezvouses. And windows.”

“Come on,” you gently push against his chest. “Just think of how nice it’ll be when this all passes. Maybe my bed will see some action other than cuddling all night long, hm?”

Mark groans. “God, why would you say something like that when you’re trying to rush me out the door?”

“If I was rushing, you’d be gone already. I’m stalling, actually.”

Another kiss. Then one on the forehead.

“Alright. Go makeup with the asshole outside. Apologize to the Chief. Help kids cross the street or something. I’ll see you soon.”

Mark grinds his teeth but submits, laying the peas on the counter.

“Sorry for defrosting those.”

You smile reassuringly, and it does help him feel like things will be okay. “Maybe we'll eat them next time.”

#mark hoffman #saw fanfic #mark hoffman x reader #angst #fanfiction #saw franchise

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blushedfemme · 2 months

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hi :) so i’m a 25yo femme lesbian and i’ve never had sex (has to do with growing up closeted in a strict over controlling environment) im only just now starting to have more independence and control over my life and i want to have sex. and i dont want to wait until i find something serious with someone cuz that could take a while and also i want to have experience for when i actually have a serious relationship with someone so i can be a good lover for them. tho i admit i do find it a bit scary i’m considering downloading dating apps to find people to have casual sex with next time i’m out of town. but i don’t really know how to go about it… i feel like no one is gonna want to fuck me because i don’t have any experience like how weird would it be if i’m in someone’s dms like hey i’m a 25yo virgin are u still dtf? lol .. so yeah if u have any thoughts or advice or if people reading this have advice please let me know cuz i’m a little nervous but i really want to do this..

hi lovely 💕 it sounds like you’ve had a very tough go of it and i’m so glad to hear you’re now able to have independence and control over your own life, that’s incredible ☺️

first, there is nothing weird about being a virgin at any age and no one who’s worth your time will fault you for it. i would happily have sex with someone who has no experience and there are a lot of people out there who feel the same!

i gently urge you to let go of the idea that you need to have a certain amount of real-life sexual experience before you start dating for a relationship. being a good lover is simply about communication, trust and curiosity about the other person. i’ve said this before and i’ll say it again: anytime someone is with a new partner, no matter how much sex they’ve had, they’re inexperienced because that particular person’s body and pleasure is brand-new to them. we are all “virgins” the first time we have sex with someone new. your future partners will be learning you at the same time that you’re learning them, and it’s beautiful and messy and real and very sexy, trust me.

in my opinion, all the experience you really need can be acquired on your own, by reading about sex (erotica, sex education, sexual health sources, etc.), watching porn that you enjoy, and by fantasizing and exploring your body by yourself. masturbation absolutely teaches you so much and is a valid form of experience. especially if you’re coming from a background of sexual repression and being closeted (i can super relate) just getting yourself comfortable with your sexuality and being horny is a whole process. but doing that will help you have better, safer and more grounded sex.

all that being said, casual sex can be great and fun and there’s nothing wrong with pursuing that, too!! a few thoughts under the readmore bc this is getting long:

always have an open convo about STIs and any other health considerations beforehand. if it feels like you can’t have that convo for whatever reason then you probably shouldn’t have sex with that person. i am guilty of being reckless with this and although i’ve been lucky so far it’s not worth the anxiety lol

be prepared to speak up!! you have to be honest about what feels good and what doesn’t, or you’re probably not going to enjoy it. people can’t read minds. it’s hard to speak up with someone you don’t know very well. our ‘niceness’ programming kicks in. you have to override it.

be very clear-eyed about expectations going in. if you’re just looking for fun, and the other person is trying to date you, that can lead to messiness and hurt. it needs to be casual for both parties.

standard safety practices apply: tell a friend where you’re going, agree on a time to check in and a protocol for if shit goes awry. trust your gut. if something doesn’t feel right, leave.

sex is a huge endorphin high, and that usually means there’ll be a crash afterward. the next day you might feel like shit and regret everything, even if in the moment you were super into it and having fun. this is normal, it’s chemicals in your brain and not a reflection on what actually happened. (unless this feeling persists or you feel icky abt something specific that went down, then talk to a trusted friend or a mental health professional if you can.) if you have a good line of communication with the person you hooked up with, just reaching out and saying “hey, i had fun the other night, i really liked it when you did _____” and letting them give you some reassurance in return can go a long way to soothe the hook-up hangover

i hope some of this helps 💗 and no matter what, going at your own pace and taking your sweet time will always feel better in the end, even though it can be tempting to rush and “make up for lost time” (speaking from experience as a late bloomer myself.) wishing you luck + lots of safe and amazing sex!! 😉

#clarke answers #ask a femme #long post

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ohtobeleah · 2 years

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I’m sitting on the edge of my seat waiting for this next update.

The B.OB series

Word Count: 5.5k

Warnings: mentions of miscarriage. Fluff, Angst. Bob Floyd pairing. Jake Seresin antagonist

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“I want to treat this as a misscarrige—“ you couldn’t quite process what Bomber was saying. You were watching her lips moved as she spoke to you but the sound of your heartbeat beating in your ears drowned at the chief medical officer aboard the HMAS Hammersley. “Do I nessisarily think it’s a miscarriage? No—but protocol would see you be flown back to base as soon as possible to be seen by an OB if it were to be.” She spoke as carefully as she possibly could as she finished up examining you, pulling her stethoscope out of her ears and placing it around her neck. “I’d like those protocols to be followed.”

“What exactly happened then?” Hangman stood in the corner of the medical bay, his arms crossed over his chest as he tried not to not linger his eyes on you.

Jake Seresin was a lot of things, you’d argue he was self centred, selfish, juvenile, reckless, self destructive and above all—obnoxiously egotistical. But he’d proven yet again that when things got bad? He’d be there. A true friend. You couldn’t bring yourself to look his way either, opting to stare directly up at the ceiling as your hands cupped your stomach.

“It’s perfectly natural for bleeding to occur in the first eight weeks of pregnancy, it’s why most mothers don’t realise they’re pregnant this early on because they think it’s either a light flow or they’re late period coming in.” Bomber explained as she packed her things away. “I don’t think you’re having a misscarige, I think that the stress of an escalated argument brought it on.” Bomber looked Hangman’s way as he stared back at her, he knew that the situation you had both just been in could have been avoided very easily if he had just said congratulations. “But I want you to see someone for a second opinion.”

“I need to call my husband.” You sat up slowly with a soft groan. “Need to talk to Bob, he’ll kill me if I don’t tell him something’s happened.”

“Good things he’s not the type to say I told you so—“ Jake mumbled under his breath, just enough so that you’d hear him.

“Yeah, he’s more the type to leave that up to the jerks.” You hissed back. Completely and utterly exhausted. Bomber just chuckled to herself as you and Hangman bickered back and forth.

“I’ll go tell Ro to have the radio ready to contact Navcon.” Bomber interrupted as she let a gentle hand fall to your shoulder. An all knowing smile on her face, full of sympathy. “Go home ma’am, get checked out, there’s always another Operation Specialist on call, but this is your family.”

Captain Flynn made his presence known soon after. Already in the process of figuring out who would take you place. A decision he didn’t take lightly. You were the best of the best, any choice under you would be just that. A disservice to this mission. To the Navy.

“Radar—“ Captain Flynn went to speak but you were quick to cut him off.

“With all due respect sir—“ you paused for a moment. Thinking for a second about what you were about to say. “I think I’m okay, and I’d like to stay aboard and—“

“Are you on crack?” Jake hissed as he stepped forward from the corner of the room. Completely and utterly dumbfounded at your request to stay. “You were just told two seconds ago by a medical professional to get a second opinion!”

“I feel fine!” You snapped back, sitting up and you let your legs hand over the medical bed. You knew you were being stubborn, but stubborn is what got you here in the first place. So successful in your career.

“Yeah well, I beg to differ—“ Jake hissed at you. “You look like you just had a major medical episode, and Bob, you know? Your HUSBAND, who’s probably going to have a heart attack when he hears about this, is going to beg and plead that you get that second opinion—“ Jake paused, he was going to say your name, your call sign, but after the blow up in the galley. He settled for sonority. “Ma’am—“ you took it all in. Letting a sigh escaped as you stood. Fixing your uniform the best you could. Ignoring what Hangman had to say as his nostrils flared. His words fell on deaf ears.

“Requesting to return to duty, sir.” You uttered out. Hangman groaned in defeat as he pushed past you, exiting the medical bay in anger. He cared too much about you to watch you suffer, but he wasn’t going to sit ideally by. If you were going to play this game? He could too.

“I’d rather you stood down and returned to base, Radar, your health and safety is paramount at this stage.” You couldn’t tell if Captain Flynn was making a suggestion or if that was an order. Settling for the latter, you pressed.

“All due respect, sir, I’d like to continue my work and focus on making sure these aviators make it home to their families.” You paused again, trying to read Captain Flynn’s expressions. “I’m okay, Bamber doesn’t think it’s a misscarrige, and quite frankly I—“ Captain Flynn held his hand up, stopping you from finishing your sentence. “Sir—?” With a grunt in his voice and a lingering anger. He raised his tone. Eyes serious.

“My last Operations Specialist is not on board this ship for quite a few reasons, one of which was his increasing habit of leaving a large space between any sentence he happened to utter and the word, sir” Captain Flynn scolded you. “I have no question of you experience and your skill, Radar, but I suggest you pay a little bit more attention to your syntax and your health. Do I make myself clear?” You held back tears, perhaps it was for the best that you returned home. Hell, maybe even Jake was right—he wasn’t going to be the worse you had to deal with. With a nod and pressed lips you replied, still trying to process the entire event that had transpired.

“Yes sir Captain Flynn sir.”

***~***~***~***~***~***~***~

Bob didn’t have his phone on him. Up on the roof cleaning out the guttering, Bob wiped the sweat from his brow. Pulling piles of decaying leaves out of the gutters that ran all the way around the home you shared. A job he told himself time and time again that he’d get around to doing but never did. Making it ten times harder for himself as he watched the piles drop from his gardening glove clad hand to the ground below. Yet another job he’d have to complete— tidying up the lawn.

“I should have brought a garbage bag up here.” Bob mumbled to himself before he made the decision to descend the ladder. Doing exactly so, Bob made his way to the kitchen to grab the roll of garbage liners from under the kitchen sink. His phone vibrating on the island bench. His heart sank into the pit of his stomach when it caught his attention. The caller ID only meaning one thing. Picking his phone up with a shaking hand, Bob answered.

“Lieutenant Floyd speaking.” Bob's voice was mousy. He could breathe, he’d forgotten how to use his lungs. Was this the phone call he’d been dreading?

“Jesus Bob the Radio Officer was about to throw me overboard if you didn’t pick up this time!” Jake hissed with a sigh of relief. Ro was a decent enough guy but he had his limits—especially when there were other pressing matters to attend to. His time was valuable and at this very moment he left like Hangman had been wasting it like a gluttonous child. Bob couldn’t quite make out who was speaking. Uttering out whatever his brain would allow him to.

“I’m sorry, who is this?” Pulling his phone away from his ear to look at the caller identification again. Bob confirmed again where he thought the call was coming from. Navcon.

“It’s Hangman, Jake, Jake Seresin man c’mon—“ Bob's eyes grew with curiosity. More confusion bubbled to the surface as he walked around the kitchen, leaning back against the island bench as he crossed his arm over his chest. Holding his phone in the other.

“I’d say it’s good to hear your voice but I’m not too sure why I’m hearing it entirely—“ Bob questioned with a tone of annoyance in his voice. Why on god’s green earth would Jake Seresin be radio calling him.

“Listen, I’m on board the HMAS Hammersley, it’s Renee—she’s” Jake couldn’t finish his sentence quick enough before Bob’s ears were heating up. His face? hot to the touch. His heart racing.

“What about my wife?” The panic was so evident in Bob's voice Jake decided it was best to rip the Band-Aid off instead of beating around the bush.

“You remember how you asked me to look out for her?” He sighed, letting his elbow lean against the small Radio Officers desk. The headset he wore making his ears sweat.

“Regrettably—“ Bob still to this day thought that asking Hangman to watch you back was not one of his finest moments. He tossed it in the blinded by love, adrenaline mixed with stupidity basket.

“Yeah well, she’s being sent back stateside, Bomber said it’s nothing serious but it’s best she gets back stateside as soon as she can.”

“What the hell is going on!?” Bob raised his voice slightly, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose as he looked around for his car keys.

“We got into an argument.” Jake began to explain, only to have Bob chime in before he could get to the punch line.

“About—What exactly? what could you two have been butting heads over so aggressively she needs to be sent back to base?” Bob huffed as he continued to look for his keys. Why weren’t they in the key bowl by the front door? Huffing out a frustrated grown Bob stood still, his mind racing.

“She let it slip she’s pregnant alright? I know! Congratu fucking lations but the way.” Jake spat in Bob's ear. “She started feeling unwell, there was blood and—“

“No, don't say it.” Bob felt sick, physically sick to his stomach. Everyone used to tell him that the sky might fall one day, but he never really believed them. But in that moment Bob felt his whole world shatter. “Don’t you dare tell me—“

“It’s not, she’s okay, just needs the proper people to confirm it.” Hangman confirmed with Bob, he knew he’d be unraveling at the seams. “The Medical Officer said not to worry, but to get a second opinion.”

“Jake—what would you do if a Medical Officer told you not to worry?” Bob questioned as he held back tears, anger pooling in his stomach and love leaked from every part of him. He needed to get to you, hold you, comfort you and be right by your side for whatever was to happen next. Jake was silent for a moment, tossing up between the two truths and a lie he could tell Bob right this second to answer his still lingering question. Closing his eyes and utterly a small ‘fuck’ Jake told the truth.

“I’d worry like hell—“

***~***~***~***~***~***

On the bright side, at least you hadn’t gone too far off the coast. You could still see the horizon. The wind raced around your face as you stood by the edge of the carrier. The HMAS Hammersley would not be another notch in your belt, perhaps this was always the way it was supposed to be. Perhaps you were meant to be home with Bob. Perhaps—well maybe you just weren’t meant to be a mother? As your mind raced a million miles an hour you felt a presence lingering behind you. Tall. Brooding. Egotistical.

“How did my husband take the news?” You sassed, looking over your shoulder as Hangman came to stand beside you. His hand gripping the guard that stopped sailors from going overboard. “God I bet you took so much pleasure in that—“ you hissed. Shaking your head as you tried to control your rage. “Ro wouldn’t let me radio base, told me you’d already done that when Captain Flynn was taking shreds off me.”

“Bob’s worried about you.” Hangman replied as his eyes caught the sight of the Horizon. “I’m worried about you.” Jake's shoulders slumped ever so slightly. “I’ve seen you work exceptionally under immense pressure, I’ve seen you stand up against admirals and I’ve watched you bring home an entire team of highly skilled, highly trained aviators all the while keeping your emotions in check. Keeping it together while you had to.” You listened carefully, you didn’t remember most of your time on board the Leyte Gulf. You remembered throwing up a lot, crying. “What I wanna know is what's different this time round that’s making you so reckless with your own health?”

You let silence linger momentarily while you decided if you were going to be truthful. Because in all honesty? You were fucking terrified of the fetus that was going inside you. It wasn’t that you didn’t want to be a mother, no. You wanted that more than anything in the world. But much like Bob, you were fucking terrified to be one. You’d been responsible for other people before, in a professional manner. But this was for life, a lifelong commitment to another human. To raise them, love them unconditionally, teach them good core values, how to feel empathy. How to love and accept people. How to know right from wrong.

How could you ever not fuck that up. You didn’t have a training manual for this. You didn’t want to disappoint someone who relied solely on you. On Bob. To disappoint a child would be the biggest failure of all and you didn’t want to fail. You weren’t someone who took failure easy.

“I’m beyond terrified—“ you said just barely above a whisper. “What if, what if I’m not a good mum?” Jake looked at you like you were speaking gibberish. How could you ever doubt your ability to be not only a good mum, but one of the best. Jake couldn’t take his eyes off you.

“Get your ass on that chopper and stop doubting yourself OS.” You frowned for a second at Jake's response. “I’m serious, I’m not going to pity you.”

“I wasn’t asking you too—“

“No you were asking me to blow smoke up your ass, gas you up, list all your good qualities so that the doubt you feel about being ready or not to bring a life into this world wouldn’t be so intimidating.” Jake smirked as you stared at him speechless. There was something real about Jake that you loved to hate and hated to love. He was a good friend, despite his flaws, his inability to play well with others, and the obvious fear or rejection he called heavy on his shoulders, Jake Seresin was a damn good friend, colleague and someone you knew would always come to bat for you.

“You know I hate you right?” You chuckled, leaning into his side as he wrapped his arm around your shoulders, pulling you close as he kissed the top of your head gently. A moment he’d cherish forever. There was a line there, he might have crossed it. But Jake didn’t care, because holding you as a friend was better than losing you as a fleeting lover. He’d get over it. Hopefully. Your head lulled softly to the side, resting against the dip of Jake's shoulder.

“Love is the pursuit of a fool—“ Jake smirked to himself. Knowing at that very moment you kept your eyes focused on the coastline, pining for that last kiss you shared with Bob, your loving husband before stepping aboard. A permanent truth, a means to get through. Heart swollen with your love for him. Only him.

“What did you say?” You questioned as you pulled away. Hearing the helicopter settle on the helipad. A gentle hand resting across your stomach, a hopefulness returned. If Jake could now, He'd tell you never to love Bob, that he could give you everything and then some. Would walk across water, would run across fire, he’d lay his life on the line just to see you smile. He’d made a promise to take care of you, And that wasn’t a promise that would crack over time.

“Bob’s probably waiting at Navcon right now—“ Jake chose to remain a constant. Knowing to have you as a friend was better than to lose you all together. He wanted to be a part of your life, but it wasn’t up to him what part he would play. “Go, get outta here.”

“I’ll send an update.” You replied, knowing there was something else in Jake's mind. His eyes lingered way past you. Focusing on something else. A thought. “Thankyou—for just.”

“Radar—“ hangman interiors when you couldn’t find the words to say thankyou. “Go.” Jake gestured to the helicopter. Nodding you pressed your lips together before you made your way slowly to where the helipad was. Jake stood still as he watched you.

“There she goes, Seresin.” Jake spoke to himself as he watched you step up into the helicopter. His heart aching. “Let her go.”

***~***~***~****~****~***~

Bob sat quietly in the civilian waiting room at the naval headquarters. Navcon. Sure, they would have let him wait in another section. But he would have been alone. There was a lady and her two twin boys waiting in the same zone as him. Both sat playing with the toys that came from the old toy box in the corner. Their imaginations taking them a million miles away.

Bob couldn’t help but wonder who they were waiting for, perhaps their father? That would be the most obvious person.

“Who are you waiting for?” The woman who sat reading what was probably a six month old magazine asked. Bob looked at her with glazed eyes. Still trying to process what she’d said.

“Who are you waiting for?” The nurse asked sharply just as you came through the emergency room doors. Your arm in a triangle sling draped across your body. Bob stood quickly as he gestured to the nurse who looked as if she was ready to tell Bob the chair he was sitting on wasn’t for rent and he’d have to leave that he was waiting for you.

“What’s the verdict?” Bob asked as you met him in the waiting room of the Lamoore emergency department. “You good? Is it broken or—?”

“Just a popped shoulder, in this stupid thing for at least a week.” You tried to move your arm but your shoulder felt stiff. It felt like it wasn’t your own. Signing you linked your hood arm with Bobs. Walking towards the exit side by side, handing Bob your discharge papers knowing your best friend would want to read everything. “I’m fine—“

“You know in hindsight, we shouldn’t have been running in the rain.” Bob mumbled as he read what the doctor had reported.

“Yeah well, we’re lacking in our cardiac fitness Robert, you know we won’t pass without that fitness test.”

“A 10.6 seems unrealistic—“ Bob scoffed, leading you towards his car.

“It’s the multi stage fitness test Bob, it’s mandatory to at least get a 10.6.” You reminded Bob. It wasn’t something you were both necessarily good at. Running. But it was something you were working on together. Bob craved the moments alone he got with you, and the early morning runs you would go on together before going about your days before meeting back up in the mess hall for lunch were always his favourite time of the day.

He thought the way the early morning sun would hit your face made you look like a goddess. He thought the way you challenged him to keep the pace was endearing when you noticed he’d fall behind to admire you. Bob loved the way you would just listen to him, you’d laugh at his attempts at shitty jokes and would give him advice on things from holding down his breakfast when flying so he didn’t have to smell like ginger all the time to how to talk to girls. He’d only ever use your own advice against you.

Bob appreciated how you’d carry his glasses in your bum bag when the bridge of his nose got too sweaty for them to stay on right and he would never let you run next to the road. He was always between you and whatever road you decided to run beside. Just in case.

Bed tried his best to break your fall when you slipped. He’d never make bed so quickly. But it was no use. The scream of agony you let out was a sound Bob wished he’d never hear again. Your shoulder, gone—not where it was supposed to be. He’d never let himself live that down.

“It’s touture—“ Bob replied as he opened the passenger side door of his car for you. Trapping you inside as you stood to face him. His arm outstretched to lean against the car, the other doing the same on the open door. “And now.” Bob pretended to look at the watch he wasn’t wearing. “You have about half an hour before advanced navigation and I have about—“ Bob paused for a moment before looking at you teasingly. “About ten minutes before my tackling defence lesson.”

“Captain O’Riley is gonna make you do two hundred push ups isn’t he?” You cringed. Sliding down into the passenger's seat as Bob followed you. Crouching on the ground.

“And every single rep I’ll be thinking about you ya little clutz.” Bob teased, ruffling your hair before he stood, shutting the passengers door for you like the gentleman he was before racing around to the drivers side. Hopping in with a huff. “But in all seriousness I'm glad it’s nothing serious, you had me worried with the whole I'm dying Spiel.”

“Please—“ you cooed, your head lulling to the side. You tried to stress less about the pain that radiated over your shoulder. You didn’t want Bob wasting precious time on you. He had a career to think about, and sure his smile lit up whatever room you were in with him and you’d kill to hear him laugh. The way he made you feel like you were the only person on earth made you crave his presence more. But there was nothing more valuable than time, and to waste it sitting in a waiting room for you? “Don’t ever sit in a waiting room for that long waiting for me again, promise.” You stared at Bob as he hesitated, he knew he’d do anything for you. Come hell or high water. His best friend.

“Don’t make me make promises you know I won’t keep.”

“I’m sorry—what did you say?” Bob shook his head as he rid his mind of memories of you. The lady chuckled to herself.

“I asked who you were waiting for? You seem, well, stressed?” She cooed. Sending Bob a soft smile as her children played. “My husband is on his way home from a six month stint.” She explained. “

Petty Officer Josh Holiday.” Bob didn’t know the name, but he felt comfort in her smile. The fact he was coming home to his family, safe, was always a good thing.

“I’m uh, waiting for my wife.” Bob explained, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. “Operations Specialist Renee Soener-Floyd.” Bob beamed, he was so proud of you.

“She's been on deployment?” The lady asked, totally invested in Bob’s story. Why he was here. She sometimes wished people would ask her more often whenever she was waiting for her husband

“Just left actually.” Bob chuckled nervously. “She’s pregnant, first trimester, somethings not right so she’s being sent back to base to make sure everything’s okay. Medical officer onboard wants a second opinion from an OB.” The small smile Bob wore had faded. His heart was beating too fast in his chest for it to be considered normal. The lady sent him a solemn look. Sympathetic and caring.

“I’m sure she’ll be okay, I’ll keep you both in my prayers.” Bob couldn’t help but to question her faith. He didn’t say anything, but as he rubbed his palms on his jeans he questioned why bad things happened to good people.

“I appreciate that.” Bob replied. “Thankyou.” Sure Bob had dabbled on the edge of having faith. But as he got older, he started to wonder if all Gods, all Goddesses, from all religions could somehow all live harmoniously with one another. That was his belief—and he did pray, to whatever god or goddess would hear him. That every version of you that Bob had loved since the day he met you, his best friend, his wife, his fire, his ice, his coworker, his everything—would be alright. And he prayed to whatever otherworldly entity who’d seek pity on a man stuck down by love that his unborn child, his mark on the world, would be okay too.

“I just want my husband—“ Bob heard you just down the hall from the waiting room. You sounded drained, tried. “Where is he?” You asked, the worry that laced your Tongue had Bob shooting up out of his chair. Racing towards you. Rounding the corner his arms grew wide at the sight of you. Watery eyes. A rollercoaster of emotion overtaking, consuming every part of you as Bob took you in his arms. A solid embrace that had you hiding your face in the crook of his neck. His hand holding the back of your head close to him. His Cologne consuming you, the smell of him bringing an otherworldly comfort. “I’m so sorry—“ your voice cracked as tears streamed down your face. Had you done something wrong, was this your fault? Of course it was, it's your body. “I’m sorry I—“

“Hey—“ Bob pulled away as he cupped your face gently, the pads of his thumbs working to dry the tears that fell. Your face was hot to the touch under his palms. “You’ve done absolutely nothing wrong.”

“Bob the baby—“ you whispered, your bottom lip trembling. “What if, what if somethings wrong.”

“Then we’ll get through it together, yeah?” Bob leaned in to kiss your forehead before pulling you back into his warm embracing, his heart breaking. “Forever and longer.”

Your wedding was a simple backyard intimate ceremony. Only a handful of family members and beloved friends. Bob struggled for months trying to write his vowels, he didn’t want to disappoint you, the love of his life, the most beautiful woman have ever met. He didn’t really know how to describe you, describe his love for you. All Bob really knew was that it was overpowering. So he wrote what he wanted you to know. From his heart.

“I don't believe that there was a single moment that I knew that I would marry you.” You tried your best not to cry as you read your vows to Bob. He looked so handsome, so happy. “Ever since that very first day five years ago when we met in the cafeteria of the naval academy, I knew you were something special.” You paused for a moment as you wiped your tears away. “I remember writing to my mum telling her all about the new friend I had made.” You chuckled as Bob beamed at you. Holding back his own tears. “Of course that wasn't the start of our love story, but it was the start of the best friendship I have ever known.” You took a deep breath to hold back your tears. “I used to think I needed a love that would complete me, but then I met you, and you showed me that I was already whole.” Bob wipes a tear that had escaped from his waterline. He didn’t know how he would cope with reading his own. “I know I can be a little indecisive at times, but today I stand here making the easiest decision of my life, becoming your wife. You my love are my greatest adventure and my home, today I might be giving you my hand but my heart has always been yours and forever will be.” Bob felt like he couldn’t breathe, the sight of you in your wedding dress had him melting in a puddle. His heart was full as he pulled his vows out of his back pocket. Shaky hands unfolding the paper as he cleared his throat. Nervous.

“Renee— you are the most thrilling and most heartbreaking woman I have ever met.” It was all from his heart, Robert Floyd had never been good with words, talking to people wasn’t something he was necessarily good at. But you made that easy. “The kind of woman people write novels about, sing songs about and cry deeply for.” Bob smiled as he looked up at you crying, full of joy. Full of love. “One of my greatest fears in life is to die, to its joys and pains while I’m still alive— To lose reverence.” Bob knew what you did for a living, respectfully, was dangerous. But so was being in love. “Being around you is to be relentlessly rescued Into the beauty of feeling.” Bob paused as he took a deep breath. Holding back tears although they still fell over his waterline. His cheeks stained with tears. Happiness leaking from every single atom of his being.

“Renee you are a divine gift to the world and it will never be lost on me how fortunate I am to call myself your husband. I realise that you gain a deeply piercing understanding of someone while doing difficult things with them in life. This life is short and every day I get to spend with you is a blessing and nothing less.” You reached for Bob's hand as you saw his chest heaving. He was about to lose it, crack under the pressure of unconditional love and admiration. Collecting himself with your simple touch Bob pressed on. “But I’ve come to know one thing more than anything and that is that loving a girl whose mind is like watching a thunderstorm during a sunset is something I could do forever. How long will I love you? Forever and longer.”

“I tried to call—“ you sighed, wiping your face as you exhaled. “I don’t think I was thinking all too straight in the med bay, Jake kinda beat me to it huh?”

“Yeah he’s—“ Bob paused as he questioned his own response for a second. “He’s good people.” Bob smirked at you before kissing your temple, wrapping his arm around your shoulders. Pulling you close. “Let’s go get you checked out.”

***~***~***~***~***~***~***~*

The doctor's office felt sterile, a clean and perfectly organised room. Bob sat as close to you as he possibly could. “I see all the vital organs are starting to develop, a good sign.” Your OBGYN Dr. Sarah spoke calmly as he rolled the ultrasound handle against your stomach. The gel cool like ice melting against you skin. “Baby is about half to three fourths of an inch, about the size of a raspberry.”

“But nothings wrong?” You asked, panic still evident in your tone. Shaking her head Dr. Sarah confirmed with you nothing was wrong.

“Everything seems to be perfectly fine with your little raspberry here, I am a little concerned about your iron levels though. They aren’t dangerously low but they’re not as high as I’d like them to be.”

“Why did she bleed on the carrier?” Bob questioned, his hand squeezing yours. “That doesn’t seem normal?”

“Rest assured dad that bleeding is totally normal during pregnancy as long as you take them seriously, you did the right thing coming back stateside mumma.” It was a sigh of relief that left you both respectfully. Bob beamed your way as he kissed your palm. Overjoyed you were alright, his baby was right. That his family was alright. “Always trust your gut.”

“I think it’s probably a good time to talk to someone about an extended stateside posting.” Bob cooed. “I don’t want you having to go through this again and something more serious happening when you're a million miles away from the nearest hospital.”

“We got kinda lucky this time didn’t we?” You replied softly.

“We did—we really did.” Bob wondered what could have happened, but he didn’t dwell for too long, promising whatever god or goddess it was that took pity on him that he’d do good by you. He’d always be there for you. That he’d continue to love you unconditionally. Making a mental note to himself to let Jake know you and the baby were in fact okay.

“Almost as if there’s people rooting for this to happen.” You teased, chuckling softly as you watched the monitor of your baby. Bob did the same. He knew what he was looking at now—a baby the size of a raspberry. “I’m rooting for this to happen.” You cooed. Bob squeezed you hand in response before whispering against your palm.

“So do I, more than anything—“

***~***~***~****~****~***~

Tags: @kkrenae @lexhalstead3 @justanothermagicalsara @luckyladycreator2 @milesrooster @a-serene-place-to-be @marantha @red-undead-raptor @shanimallina87 @sarahjoestewy-blog

#bob floyd angst #bob floyd fanfiction #top gun hangman #top gun maverick fanfiction #top gun bob #jake seresin angst #jake hangman seresin #hangman seresin x reader #bob floyd x reader

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themonotonysyndrome · 1 year

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Hello !! I just wanted to share some of my headcanons if you don’t mind :DD sorry if its too long :((

Sometimes I just can’t help but think about the Baroness’ feelings the moment Castin presented lingerie to them as a gift before their courting. Adding onto that, I also think about the way they feel during and early on in their marriage with Castin, and I’m talking about SUPER early. Like, “got married 2 hours ago” married.

Courting is a two way street in both nations, both parties agree to court and be courted. Although the motives for such things are different when it comes to country, social class, etc., what remains are the courting methods that they do.

As I said before, the motives are different for each country. In the Coastal Empire, it’s more common for nobles to court each other to get more leverage in life; more money, more connections, more land, you get the gist.

The same motives can’t be said about Intacia, their motives of courting aren’t exactly the same. They don’t care about the type of gift that they give, so long as the recipient accepts it. To them, it’s the thought that counts, no matter how inappropriate the gift / timing is.

How does this intertwine with the burning ache in Castin’s chest whenever he sees the Baroness smiling, laughing, or just having fun in general? Well I’m glad you asked <3

I like to think that the Baroness and Lord Reyes made an agreement when they were still in university. The agreement says that if they are both 27 years old and still unmarried, they would court each other, then get married to one another. Why 27? Because married couples who are 25 and older get some tax benefits, doesn’t matter what type of married couple they are, as long as they’re married.

Lord Reyes was already 27 at the time the Baroness broke the news of them and Castin courting, the Baroness on the other hand, was 26 and there were only 2 months before their 27th birthday.

The Baroness made their Intacian debut on their birthday month, with two of their friends in the audience as they were then embarrassed to the point of tears in front of hundreds of nobles. The Baroness looked to the king for him to reprimand the crowd and his dear, guarded brother, only to be met by Rhett minimizing their feelings, saying to “not make a scene”.

Adding insult to this newly inflicted injury was the realization that this could all be avoided if Castin knew the protocols to gifting someone a gift deemed too inappropriate for the public, especially nobles from both respective countries. If the gift was something like a sex toy, condoms, herbal contraception tea, or in this case, lingerie, he should’ve put a pink star on the packaging.

Hello, Neptune! Dude, dude - don't apologise about how long your headcanons are. I LOVE READING IT!

I love how Intacia and the Coastal Empire view courting differently; your ideas fit with the cultures perfectly! The Imperial sees courting and marriage as something to elevate themselves in love (though marrying of love does happen every now and then) while the Intacians put great value in the thoughts of who would be their future partners and the meanings behind every courting gift.

(Still though, lingerie at a first meeting? Castin, I really, REALLY, wanna know your thought process behind that one!)

Having the Baroness and Lord Reyes discuss their possible future was a good move, honestly. Even if Lord Reyes' feelings for the Baroness is nothing more than platonic, they would make good allies.

AND OH MY GOD, THE MOMENT RHETT SAID TO US NOT "TO MAKE A SCENE!?" I WOULD'VE GIVEN HIM AND CASTIN THE BIGGEST ATTITUDE EVER! IF I CAN'T RESORT TO VIOLENCE, I WOULD GO OUT OF MY WAY TO MAKE RHETT'S LIFE FUCKING HELL! I WOULD LITERALLY MAKE THE QUEEN ASCENDANT CHOOSE BETWEEN ME OR HIM; I WANT THIS MAN TO FUCKING GROVEL ALONGSIDE CASTIN!

...so yeah. I have some opinions about how Rhett behaved during our Intacian debut.

But again, cultural misunderstanding is definitely a thing and wait - did Castin ever apologise for humiliating the Baroness?? He had that whole confession about how he wasn't like the other Intacian boys, always struggle to fit in and yada, yada yada, but did did he ever shown genuine remorse about the lingerie incident!?

I... I can't remember.

#monotony's rambling #desmond asmr #headcanons #castin hammer #baroness (listener)#THIS BITCH IS GETTING HEATED UP! XD

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spurgie-cousin · 2 months

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I’m the anon who had the bonus option; I’ll be completely honest to that one reply and say I don’t keep up on the royal family at all beyond the big trending topics, so other than knowing that Kate had surgery (which I only learned about because of the “where’s kate?” conspiracies recently) I had no idea where she’s actually recovering. I was also making the assumption that paparazzi was posted outside of wherever she’s staying with their telescope lenses and someone has a drone ready to go up so they could be the first one to get the “KATE MIDDLETON SPOTTED” headline image like I’d imagine would happen here in the US, unless the UK has different laws surrounding paparazzi.

Tldr that reply was correct that nothing about my opinion was based on fact, but if there is any kind of protocol keeping her inside no matter where she is, she’s bound to have moments of boredom like anyone else would

(this one is from when we were talking about Kate Middleton) oh that's ok babe, the royals have such wild protocol sometimes it wasn't a far-fetched guess. you could tell me the Kate wasn't allowed to show her forearms on the third Sunday of the month and i would probably believe it lol.

also just while we're on the Kate Middleton subject: i know most people who pay attention probably know but just in case you don't, she's come out and said that during her abdominal procedure, they confirmed she has cancer (didn't specify what kind). so she's been going through preventive chemotherapy.

i feel awful that she has to go through that (esp so young) and wish her a speedy recovery, but i still have so many questions as to why the royals PR people handled her absence the way that they did lol.....why did they do all that weird stuff instead of just sticking to their guns? being gone for medical issues makes sense

#also kate took the blame for the edited family photo but idk about that #in an organization so strict about public appearance you're telling me they just let her release badly edited photos on her own?

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djsherriff-responses · 2 months

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I’m attempting an actual set up/timeline of sorts for Captain Laserhen and wanted to share what I’ve written down so far

I appreciate opinions and criticism if you’re comfortable reading about an au involving themes of Eugenics, unethical practices that go against people’s bodily autonomy and consent , male pregnancy, abuse and general fears regarding pregnancy, parenthood and how that can change someone

You see Eden, the big fans of eugenics that they are , don’t feel it’s enough to simply scan through their civilian population and hunt down those with “worthy” genetics for their various military programs: They want a way to manufacture super soldiers personally

Cloning seems like an obvious choice and cloning technology is something they have access to. But it takes so many resources just to create and maintain one clone through its development , never mind all the mutations and amount of failures that could happen during the cloning process, and then there’s the issue of this information getting out to the press and the controversy it’d cause

But most importantly, clones are essentially dolls with a conscious, and dolls don’t have any loyalty to their owners. Sure Eden is a master at brain washing and almost perfected the art of manipulating people. But Eden already has defectors and traitors despite their best efforts to maintain control of their own civilians , who’s to say what chaos would happen if mass produced clones became part of the equation?

No , it best to keep cloning to a strict minimum of a select few. A few rogue clones is much easier to deal with then an entire trained army of rogue clones

Eden realised it’s not enough to raise children to wield guns , their soldiers need a reason to remain loyal to Eden despite the horrors and abuse, a connection to keep them tied to the system even when doubt eats at them in the dead of night

And what greater ties is there than that of blood: A family

So Eden gave their male super soldiers a sort of “retirement protocol” where they essentially have an artificial womb (don’t ask me the specifics of this it’s sci fi horror nonsense) so that when those super soldiers (ideally) aged out of the military, they’d get pregnant and pop out a replacement to take their place

Or if a super soldier chose to become a traitorous terrorist, Eden will have leverage to bring them back into their arms

(Dolph in this au is cis and while the Eden army is dominantly cis, there’s likely issues a trans or genderqueer character would face from this situation that simply has not crossed my cis brain, just wanted to add this tidbit here since the set up is primarily focused on cis men going through this unethical treatment)

The specific reasons why this was done to male soldiers:

Women already have wombs and the capability to produce children, so it’d be pointless all things considered

There’s a larger amount of men in the army compared to women, so obviously Eden has gotta put their resources on getting *the men pregnant* replacements for those men ready

Men who are amab aren’t expected to ever fall pregnant and thus aren’t prepared for the turmoil and stress that comes with pregnancy the ways which women are. The men would be in a vulnerable position and would seek out help by any means necessary , plus be much easier to manipulate (either through use of their new found motherly instincts or their desire to be rid of this unexpected baby)

Most importantly,men do not have the means to have a natural birth. This is the most crucial part as the way Eden has done it, the men will have no choice but to seek medical attention to have a c section when the baby is due and thus even if that man does not want to return to Eden, Eden will still have the means to find him anyways

“But what about the press/public learning about this?!” Oh Eden already has an answer to that: Male pregnancies are a result of a strange effect of dimension X leaking into our universe and biologically impacting Eden’s male population(which is all the more reason it’s important to keep alien scum out!)

Basically, Eden blames the aliens. Because a vulnerable pregnant man is going to be far more willing to crawl back into the system that abused him if he believes aliens are the ones making him go through the horrific process of an unnatural pregnancy, instead of the truth that Eden has purposely done unethical practices on his body to keep him on a leash

And Dolph is one of those men that Eden unethically gave with the ability to have babies, all without his knowledge or consent, yay!

Side note, normal children are 50:50 when it comes to inheriting their parents’ genetics. But super soldier babies actually take about 75 to 85% after their “mother” (again, Eden being huge fans of eugenics and not wanting to lose such valuable genes) so any children Dolph has, regardless of the other parent, will always take more after him

The timeline of this au diverges from the canon plot as of episode two , before Dolph walks in on Alex sleeping with Pagan (so anything that happened after that doesn’t happen, most notably Jade does not die). Instead of seeing the cigarette and finding his cheating boyfriend, the smell of the smoke makes Dolph vomit and team ghost are forced to abort mission. Though technically it’s been divergent from canon before episode one even happens

#captain laserhawk #dolph laserhawk #Captain Laserhen #rambles #Tw mpreg #mpreg #tw abuse #Tw violation of consent #Bodily autonomy violation #Tw abuse #tw dubious consent #Tw eugenics

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sapph1cghost · 3 months

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so i was talking to my friend about this and i want more opinions: does a person wanting a second chance relevant to whether or not they were brought through the portal?

obviously there are other factors effecting what brought them through the to the protocol-world, but i think the idea of someone actively wanting a second chance at life effecting that would be really cool.

for example, jon literally says (and martin agrees) in the last episode of tma “maybe everything works out, and we end up somewhere else.” and if that doesn’t express how desperately they want another chance at life, idk what does.

and with jonah he would obviously want a second chance at the apocalypse, to feel how he felt before when he was the center of the eye, and while we don’t know a lot about celia i could definitely see her also wanting a second chance, especially since if i remember correctly she doesn’t really remember who she was before melanie and georgie rescued her.

this would also explain why melanie and georgie and basira haven’t shown up. melanie and georgie have each other (plus georgie probably wouldn’t be able to go with the fears anyway) so i feel like they’d be fine with where they are as long as they have each other. and while basira seems like she would want another chance to be with daisy, she also has had a lot of time at this point to accept what’s happened and come to terms with the fact that daisy is gone.

idk how explicitly this will be brought up in tmagp, if at all, but i think it would be really fun and so far seems to fit with the characters we’ve seen cross over with the fears

#the magnus protocol #tmagp

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paging-possum · 7 months

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Milwaukees your protocol

I spent so much time this week being like “ohhhh god I haven’t been working on my comic at all this week, where are the pictures” as if I haven’t been plugging away at the script nonstop. Everyday I wake up and I start writing and then I realize what I’m writing is really weak and then I start rewriting BUT the outline is fairly solid and I’m maybe ⅓ of the way through writing. This will get done and it will be interesting (affirmation) (prayer).

As previously mentioned, I don't have that much art this week because writing, but I did decide that the characters in this one are going to all get fun unique little outfits because I ADORE putting those together! It’s like designing someone’s room, but you get to see it way more often in the story! Lyssa’s room will show up though, nobody worry, you WILL get to see her space at some point. While doing that I did realize that my roommate and I dress like Lyssa and Terry respectively which is humbling on my behalf but at least I’m in control of his outfits. And speaking of my roommate, the reason I don’t have more characters drawn is because I was going to do that last night but we ended up going through all her dating apps so I could have opinions about all the people she’s talking to and it was a BLAST. It also took 3 hours. But that's what my 14 hours on a bus this week are going to be for (lying to myself) (I will fall asleep immediately).

Of course he has blue hair and pronouns. Other projects this week! I'm drawing lots of cities so I'm doing lots of city studies! They’re very fun and VERY useful for some current things I'm working on >:] I’m hoping to do more when I go home for break this week and am no longer stuck on campus, but for now I’m working off photos my sister sends me since she lives somewhere way more visually interesting than I do.

On the homework front, I made some very cool things this week! I had to make a piece using a rubber duck in ‘an atypical way’ and ended up making a comic I’m really happy with, but it also has a nonzero amount of me bitching about my old friend group being so obsessed with boys so I can’t really post it. But I can post some of it!

WHAT AM I LISTENING TO THIS WEEK:

Riverdale. Yes it’s a show, yes it’s still been such a core part of this week’s creative process that I just have to put it down. I’m finally getting to season 7 and GOD I love Riverdale everyone watch Riverdale so you can finally understand the triumphs and defeats the epic highs and lows of high school football.

Too Polite to Fight by Autoheart

Friendly Neighborhood Poltergeist by Rory Webley

Archie’s All American from the hit CW drama Riverdale

Also another blatant plug for my friend who introduced me to devlogs in the first place- she does a radio show on Wednesdays that I always listen to (it’s been running for two weeks but it’s just that good) (if friends or mutuals want to know when/where to listen you can message me and ask) Anyways, she posts the playlists on Spotify afterwards, here’s this weeks if anyone wants to hear it and future sets! a

#comic update #my art #milwaukee protocol #sorry these keep getting later every week I sit down in the morning like I should work on my devlog now but ill totally have time later #and then I fuck around until I have to go to bio class

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ygsunflower · 1 year

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Another unpopular Station 19 opinion of mine-

Contrary to many who have taken a liking on Chief Ross, I still dislike her. Mostly for her “hypocritical” views on sexism and double standards within the SFD system. I loved seeing her handling the SPD in the police brutality episode, and what she said to the SFD union about “the boys club ways” was absolutely on point. But with how she treated Maya, especially what she said to Maya about being insubordinate yet praising Andy for the exact same quality… I’m just failing to understand that both Andy’s and Sullivan’s actions were clearly against the rule/protocol, but how come Ross was oaky with them but not with Maya breaking rules to save a child?! [Excuse me for going on a tangent here, but Maya freaking saved a child’s life and helped taking down a trafficking ring breaking the rules while Ross offering Andy the captaincy for leading a mutiny, and Sullivan, who she promoted, was a drug addict who overdosed on drugs he stole from the PRT. I’m not here disagreeing with Andy’s action, nor to say that drug addiction makes Sullivan a bad person and thus forever irredeemable. Absolutely not.]

I know Maya also went on blackmailing her, but to my knowledge, that happened long after she got shut down by Ross about her demotion hearing? Not defending Maya, that girl clearly went off the wagon, and I’m glad she’s finally getting some professional help. She acknowledged how she went about the issue wrong and it almost cost her her life. That is a character growths I love seeing.

Anyways, with all these previous records, I have a hard time truly believing that this current Ross is sincerely advocating for SFD systemic change about racism, sexism, etc. All I see is a person who uses these arguments to benefit herself. Clearly I am biased, and I’m not all that invested in Ross’ storyline, so I could be totally off on reading the character. However, I just started rewatching the show, so maybe I’ll change my view on her after the rewatch?!

As much as I can’t stand Ross talking about the double standards she faced from the SFD system [again, not discrediting her being treated unfairly by the system], I still hope this character sticks around on the show. Even though I don’t like her, I still want to see more imperfect characters, especially imperfect or hard to like complex female of color characters. In my eyes, Natasha Ross is someone who’s been in the unjust and unfair system for way too long. Even though she’s aware of herself being treated as less than an equal most of her career and wants to change the system because of it, she still has a hard time actually follow through with that when her personal interests weren’t on the line. She’s a victim of the unjust system, but in a way, she’s also an enforcer/subscriber to the said system. And on top of that, Ross is a proud & ambitious woman who will do what it takes to get what she wants. I so appreciate having this type of complex “grey” characters on television.

With how the story goes, I hope as she struggles to fight her own battle against the SFD patriarchy, she’d eventually come to the realization that how she treated Maya was also perpetuating the same toxic old ways. I hope to see them both apologizing, and reconcile to the point that Ross can stop being hostile to Maya. [I’m only saying this because in 6x15, Maya seems to know that she crossed a line blackmailing her and was nervous about seeing Ross while Ross still didn’t think much of Maya and was very harsh on her. Not blaming Ross because of Maya’s previous actions and Ross might not necessarily aware of Maya’s change of heart. But so far Maya has done all the apologizing and self loathing/guilt confessions, she deserves to have her being treated and bullied unfairly apologized or at least acknowledged by the enforcer/enabler.] I hope to see Ross reinstate Maya somehow. Maya was a good captain to be in such leadership positions. I also want her and Ross to become a healthy pair of nemeses. Their ambitious and disciplined natures are a lot alike, and seeing more women in leadership respecting while competing against each other in a healthy way on tv can never hurt. I’d like to think that Maya and Ross can keep each other on their toes on the job. And once in a while when they have to work together, they’d form a solid work partnership because of their no-bullshit/get-the-job-done work ethic.

[I didn’t include Andy in this conversation because the current writings of the show only focused on building up the drama and conflicts between Maya and Ross.]

#do not come at me #unpopular biased opinion?#station 19 #maya bishop #natasha ross

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tiktokitssinoclock · 2 years

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Comforting you after a Breakup- The Valorant Guys (p.I)

For the past few months, I've been talking to a close friend over Snapchat about a guy I like and found out last night she showed him everything I said. He handled it very well and rejected me so sweetly, so I'm not even terribly upset on that front. I'm just really sad someone I trusted would betray me like that. This is very self-serving so my apologies, but writing it has made me feel eons better <3

SFW // Minors and ageless blogs, DNI // You will be blocked

Sova

The poor man thought for sure someone you loved had died

He noticed how every time you left your room, you'd look like a zombie

Hair messy, dark circles to the max, eyes still red and puffy from crying, etc.

When he asks around the protocol to try and figure out what happened, most of the guy agents seemed just as clueless as he was

Your closer lady friends, though, like Jett and Raze, just kinda shook their heads and told him to give you some space

He wasn't a fan of that approach, though, because in his opinion, no one should have to grieve alone

Sova decided to go to your room with a box of tissues and planned to talk to you about it, perhaps also remind you that you're allowed to take a short leave for bereavement if necessary

Although it took some major convincing, you finally let him into your room, the messy state of your usually clean space alarming him

Once you were both seated on the foot of your bed, he offered you the box

“I know dealing with loss is never easy, but you don’t have to hole up alone. We’re always here to listen.”

You blinked in surprise before giving him a watery laugh

You were touched by the gesture but explain that no, no one passed away, you just got broken up with

“Oh. Oh, I thought- I’m so sorry.”

“I still think this was very sweet of you, Sasha. Everything just... kinda sucks right now, you know?”

While he was relieved no one was dead, it still bothered him to see you so upset

He decided right then and there that he was going to help you feel better, starting first by cleaning your room

You initially protested as he walked about with your trash can in tow, picking up the trash he found here and there

By the time he started hanging up the laundry you neglected to even fold, though, you accepted you weren’t shaking him that easily and begrudgingly helped him clean

Afterwards, he had you put on your favorite show and hung out with you, letting you lean into his shoulder when you got a little teary-eyed and stroking his hand soothingly over your hair

Quality time was just what you needed to pull yourself together, and he was willing to give it to you as long as you needed

Yoru

You thought you were doing well at hiding how upset you really were, which was quite the feat

Especially since getting dumped over text really fucking blows

But the other agents weren't clueless, especially Yoru

He noticed how your usual spark seemed to dim- you weren't kicking your feet while sitting in your chair, you weren't animatedly talking to everyone about this and that, the usual banter between him and you during missions had all but dried up

Something was off

He really didn't like that

One night before you could run off to your room right after you finished training, he caught up with you in the hallway

He practically demanded that you spill the beans on whatever was going on, and after a few minutes of pressing, you finally did

You showed him the texts and he scrolled through them, his eyes rolling as he skimmed over the exchange

"Being a dick myself, I can truly say that was a dick move."

“It’s really not that big of a deal, I’ll be fine- hey!”

He steered you both into the common area and plopped you down on the couch, where he wouldn't let you leave until you actually got it all out of your system

It didn’t take long for you to finally cave and do just that

You ended up ranting to him for an ungodly amount of time, going back and forth between being really pissed and really upset

Admittedly though, being able to release all those bottled up emotions felt really good

For the next few weeks, he took to inviting you to the gym at late hours to rough up a punching bag or two

Whether or not you felt the need to speak, he was always there to help you wrap your fists before starting and perfect your technique

Although the outlet seemed to help you get back to your usual self, he still couldn’t shake the growing anger he harbored towards your ex

With each powerful punch you sent into the bag he held steady for you, he had to refrain from taking your ex’s number to Killjoy and getting their exact location

Chamber

No one on the protocol could figure out why, but out of nowhere one night, you took to baking until early in the morning

Not in a peaceful manner, either

You would practically slam dough flat with the rolling pin, ignore the cacophony that the pans and pots made when you were searching through them for a pie tin, fume in an unspoken rage that drained the life out of the kitchen

You weren't one to get mad and, not wanting to piss you off any further, the agents largely tried to stay out of it

Not Chamber, though

Especially when your antics were keeping him awake

He walked into the kitchen when you were being especially noisy one night, finding you trying to scrape burnt cookies off a tray while you cursed under your breath

He pinched his nose and sighed

"What are you doing?"

"Not anything right, that's for sure. First I added too much baking powder, and then I burnt the fucking cookies, and... and..."

You fell silent, your movements slowly growing still

"Dammit. That bastard fucking cheated on me."

His eyes widened at the confession as you finally abandoned the pan in the sink, sitting down at the dining table so you could bury your face in your hands

There were a lot of things going through his mind, namely ‘Who?’, ‘Why?’, and ‘Could Cypher wipe my name from a warrant registry?’ but first and foremost, he pulled up a chair beside you

He got the feeling you didn’t really want to talk about it, at least not yet, so he offered the next best thing

"Do you know how to make madeleines?"

"... Madeleines?"

"I'll show you, if you want. Come."

He spent the rest of the night showing you how to bake the small pastries, helping you take it slow and steady

He even managed to earn a few laughs from you after a mishap with the flour left his glasses coated

He was careful not to breathe a word about your situation, proving to be a welcome, calming distraction you needed as you processed everything you were feeling

The anger pumping in your veins was gradually purged out with the help of his gentle company and after about four days, you finally felt like talking it out

He didn’t once judge you or give any smart remarks, he simply listened and offered advice you actually found useful

The creative insults he sent your ex’s way certainly soothed the burn, too

#valorant imagines #valorant headcanons #valorant sova #sova x reader #valorant yoru #yoru x reader #valorant chamber #chamber x reader

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