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#ted lasso wednesdays
soup-or-who-lock · 1 year
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something something "Why on earth would you believe that [I hated your violin playing]?" "Because you said literally said that to me once, dad!" something something children remember the fucked up things their parents do or say like major historic events, while parents forget them like average tuesdays...or something
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n0t-1nt3r3st1ng · 11 months
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Enid : Wednesday, if you die, do you want to be buried or cremated? Like if you were hit by a bus today, what do I do?
Wednesday : Go after the bus driver and make him pay for what he did to me. Avenge me, Enid. Avenge me!
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For this week’s @ficwip word: motion
“Now, Sam, I don’t trust Jamie to tell me. He’ll just say something, so I don’t worry. Tell me the truth, how is he?” Georgie asked.
Jamie made a motion cutting across his neck, trying to silence the truth before turning the phone back to himself. “I’m fine, Mummy, I just need to rest a couple days. I’ll probably be playing in the match next weekend.”
“Georgie! He is lying,” Sam said leaning over to be in view of the Facetime.
“Come on, mate!”
Sam pulled the phone from Jamie’s grasp.
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daydream-cement · 4 months
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Here is a sampling of some of the works my girlfriend has created so far. She is working on others as we speak!
The shop is not live yet, but I will post the link when it is.
Please comment/send in an ask of more ladies you want to see! We would love to know what quotes you want as well!
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marilynthornhilllover · 10 months
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Gwendoline christie, Lisa Anne Walter and Hannah waddingham OMGGGG😭💕
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andyridgeley · 1 year
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happy ted lasso s3 week to those who celebrate
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masonjarart · 11 months
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Missing him
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nativestarwrites · 12 days
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'Pour' is the Ficwip word this week. This is from the first chapter of Maybe This Trophy isn't Real Love (I'm Good Enough) where Jamie visits his dad in rehab.
It's a welcome reprieve from the awkwardness for both of them as his dad goes to the kettle on a unit in the corner and busies himself with making tea for two. Neither of them say anything while they wait for the kettle to boil but as his dad pours the water into two mugs he freezes. “Um.. I don’t- how’d you like your tea, son?” He asks, hesitantly and without looking at Jamie, eyes fixed on the mugs in front of him. Because that was something you were supposed to know, right? How your family members took their tea? You shouldn’t need to ask them, like they’re strangers, or guests that come over so infrequently that you can’t remember their preferences.
I want to do a bit more planning and plotting on this one, but I'm thinking I might start posting it next month.
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abubblingcandle · 26 days
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@ficwip word of the day is Sick. I am 2.5k into my RoyJamie sick fic so I gotta
“Ah Jamie Tartt, I woke you. Is this bench more comfortable than your mattress. My mattress is padded with the down of a specific type of goose only found in Columbia. It allows me to continue to look this rested unlike you currently look,” Zava commented, staring at Jamie like an eagle with a mouse in its sights. “Fuck you.” Jamie’s voice made all of the coaches hum in realisation. The two hostile words croaked out of Jamie’s mouth with such a crack that they sounded painful. His tongue twitched out to moisten his lips, dry from just that level of action, and his breathing now had a whistling wheeze accompanying each breath. Jamie was sick as a dog.
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jamiesfootball · 2 months
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For the word thing: pain, run, hide and/or tell
I'd apologize for the late response, but I think you know I'm always good for a snippet for you <3
Pain
He watched in a haze as the team dispersed, shouting out plans for the long weekend as they mingled towards their cars. Meanwhile, Jamie lagged behind, his feet cemented in the doorway as he eyed the meters left between him and his car. Exhaustion dragged at his eyelids like bricks in a river; the last thing he wanted to do was navigate London traffic. He couldn’t take it anymore. All the extra training, the early mornings, none of it was getting him anywhere. He wasn't even one of eleven anymore- he was one of zero, because zero was how many goals he had to his name and what good was a number if he couldn't even put a ball in a net? His whole life had turned to shit, and all Jamie had to show for fighting the inevitable was a body made out of rubber and a deep, throbbing pain at the base of his skull from lack of sleep. Without fanfare or warning, a hand smacked into the back of his head and ruffled his hair. He didn't need to turn to know it was Zava. It was always Zava. It was only ever Zava.
Run
Jamie stayed quiet while Jan undid the laces on the other shoe. Not long ago, this would've been unusual. New, quiet Jamie had been the default for the past two weeks, and Jan found he didn't care for it. If he didn't start running his mouth again, he'd have to resort to drastic measures. They worked in tandem to peel his shirt and undershirt off. Too many slick tackles in the rain left behind a folded layer of mud like fingerprints from a giant. Jan tried to slide his fingers between skin and shirt to give some breathing room, but in the end the water-logged fabric won, and there was no helping how the material scratched its way off, Jamie hissing between his teeth. The fabric got stuck again, folded over itself and clinging tight around Jamie's arms, and together they pulled until it snapped off his hands.
Hide
“You gave him a chance.” “Nah, don’t give me credit for that. He was the one who came back asking for one. He put all the work in. He did it himself,” Ted admitted. "Me? I never knew what to do with that kid. Not sure I ever did him a favor the whole time I was there.” A sniffle. Then a louder one. Then- “Fuck.” If Roy’s eyebrows shot any higher, they’d be in the stars. “Did you just say ‘fuck?’” he asked, not bothering to hide his giddiness. Ted chuckled, wet and clogged and fond. “What can I say? Our Jamie brings out parts of me even I didn’t know I had. What about you- you gonna tell him you heard mom cursing on the phone?” “Fuck no,” Roy answered. “That one’s for me. My gift for cleaning up the mess you left over here.” “Well, Coach Kent, as much as I disagree with your asking price, I’m not one to turn away a bargain.”
Tell
I don’t want you, she wanted to reassure him. I love you, and I miss you so much all of the time, and I’m not fit to be anyone’s anything right now with all the baggage I’ve got strapped to me, but please, Jamie, please let me be there for you. Please tell me what’s going on. You’re scaring me.
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trickarrows-bishop · 6 months
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i be saying “she the loml fr” a lil too much about fictional women…
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soup-or-who-lock · 1 year
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Rebecca, Bex, and Jade should get together and 9 to 5 crusty old Rupert
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another thing re: tedbecca + elinor/edward, since we’re playing ted lasso + sense & sensibility parallels this week--
elinor and edward spend a bunch of time together at the beginning of the story and are really vibing and have this great connection and it seems like an engagement is imminent, and then pesky developments happen to separate them and they spend foreverrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr apart like the very concept of them being together has just been totally left in the dust by reality!!!!!!!!! but they still get to live happily ever after at the end!
i am taking my comfort where i can get it at this point, okay. and where i can get it is jane motherflipping austen.
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Alive from the next chapter of rage, rage against the dying light for the @ficwip word of the week:
“I’m so fucking sorry, Roy,” Jamie says, voice cracking, blinking up at the ceiling, willing the tears away the way he learned to when he was younger and with his Dad and in danger of crying.
By the time Jamie manages to compose himself enough to look at Roy, he’s asleep, his hand limp and cool in Jamie’s warm and clammy one. But Jamie only squeezes his friend's hand harder, holding into it like a lifeline, proof beyond the beeping in the room that Roy’s still here, that Roy’s alive.
And then the dam breaks, and Jamie’s body shudders as a sob tears through his battered body. An inhuman noise of grief and relief, fear and acceptance escapes his lips and he cries until Keeley returns to the room half an hour later. His shoulders shake as she pulls his head to her, and Jamie grips her desperately with his good arm. She runs her fingers through his hair, lightly scratching his scalp and whispering reassuring words until Jamie cries all the tears he has.
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juuls · 1 month
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Multi-Fandom Fic Recs
The @fanfic-reading-challenge gives me the opportunity to explore tons of fandoms I normally wouldn't, and I wanted to share some of my favourite so far this year!
Game of Thrones
and in the night, you'll hear me calling by shawsdavid | T | 10k | Jon/Sansa/Margaery: When you met your soulmate, touched them for the first time, you would see everything in all its colorful glory.
A Knight's Watch by DolorousEdditor | M | 670k | Jonsa: Jon Snow is forbidden to take the black by his father. Instead he sent to squire for a famous knight, beginning a long arduous journey that causes him to cross paths with characters he never would have. Along the way he learns truths long hidden and discovers love in the most unlikely of places. All of this in the shadow of the War of Five Kings and the coming of the Others.
Potterverse
Dancing with Draco by diamonddaydream | T | 19k | Dramione: Retelling of the Yule Ball segment of Goblet of Fire as a Dramione story. Hermione Granger needs a dance tutor before she embarrasses her partner, Viktor Krum, and herself at the Yule Ball. Draco Malfoy needs a good deed to make amends for hexing her teeth. Both of them need to keep everyone else for finding out what's going on between them. Fluffy romance with just a touch of angst. NOTE: story continues in "Draco Takes a Mark."
All I Have Never Known by LittleSixx | M | 32k | Dramione: The Ministry of Magic requires all magical people to marry someone of opposite blood status by 25. The Malfoys host a ball to help Draco meet a non-pureblood witch, and the one he falls for isn't who she claims to be.
Divination for Skeptics by olivieblake | M | 98k | Dramione: The latest in magical advancements is an enchantment that reveals the bearer’s romantic compatibility with another person. Effectively eliminating uncertainty from dating, the charm can tell you whether or not you’ve found The One with a precise, Hermione Granger-approved calculation of traits and preferences. It’s a foolproof method of predicting relationship happiness. It’s also, for Hermione, positively dreadful news. Dramione, post-war, soulmate AU.
The Black Rose by DarkCloud190, Rijaya83 | E | 166k | Dreomione: After years of a rocky relationship, Hermione Granger is single again, and for the life of her she cannot stop staring at her two friends. Draco Malfoy and Theo Nott both work with her at the DMLE and she is analyzing everything they say, do, or breathe. Surely, she is just imagining it. They have been dating each other for a year now and couldn't possibly be interested in her. Hermione's troubled love life aside, there is a killer targeting a specific group of people, putting both Hermione and Theo at risk.
Hermione Granger, Demonologist by BrilliantLady | T | 47k | Hermione & Theo: Hermione was eight when she summoned her first demon. She was lonely. He asked what she wanted, and she said a friend to have tea parties with. It confused him a lot. But that wasn’t going to stop him from striking a promising deal with the young witch.
The Accidental Courtship by Lomonaaeren | T | 14k | NottPott: Harry gets a soul-mark during his eighth year at Hogwarts, and is hopeful that he can finally be sure he’ll have someone who loves him for himself. When Theodore Nott rejects him, Harry steps back and goes to live his own life. Theo, who doesn’t want to be trapped in the limelight at Potter’s side, finds himself falling in love anyway.
A Star and Her Dragon by Lizzie_carlile | E | 256k | Theomione, Drarry, Hermione & the Malfoys: “The order took everything from me,” Lucius spoke again. “Now I’ll become the monster they always feared I would be.” The Death of the Malfoy Daughter was the catalyst for Lucius Malfoy becoming the man that everyone feared he would. With a second war brewing and secrets finally coming to light, one girl holds the key to turning the tides of the war.
Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves
Odd Little Family by chimneystacks | T | 1.7k | Xedgin: "Kira found it practical to believe that her father would someday remarry, and even more so to believe that it would be to the woman who was already a trusted, guiding figure to his child. Therefore, it was much to her surprise when a tall, handsome man interrupted her lute practice to ask her blessing in his proposal to her father."
House of the Dragon
The Falcon Becomes a Dragon by MichelleGz | T | 28k | Daemyra & Aemma: What if Rhaenyra and Daemon “woke up” during the tourney that was hosted for Baelon’s impending birth, both remembering their future life. What if Aemma’s labors were not so far along. What if there was time to save her? Will Aemma believe that her beloved husband was going to kill her for the child in her womb?
you and i are made of fire by aur_el_ias | M | 8.6k | Daemyra: Soulmarks are no trivial thing. Indeed, the words inscribed on the wrist are far from frivolous—they are the most important words heard in one's life, spoken by another. Unfortunately, save for a few exceptions, most highborn marriages are not soul-bound marriages. This is the story of one of those exceptions. OR In 105 AC, Daemon Targaryen finds his soulmate.
Viable Alternatives series by madina | T | 375k | Laenor/Rhaenyra, Daemyra, her children, and Viserys' children: So much could have been solved and so many could have been spared if a universe with dragons, magic, wargs and White Walkers had artificial insemination—and if the characters tried to be anything else but a dysfunctional family.
lodestar by aramblingjay | M | 43k | Daemyra: A Targaryen destined for a soulmate is a strange, broken creature, alone in a way that lives in their very bones, waiting for the half that will make them whole. Daemon waits sixteen years for her, and then a whole lot longer. A soulmates share scars au.
From Ashes to Embers by ladyalianora (AmbitiousWitch) | M | 185k | Cregan Stark/Rhaenyra, Daemyra: After burning by Sunfyre's flames, Rhaenyra Targaryen wakes up in her maiden bed, five and ten once more. With her mind broken and a determination to not relive the life she left behind, in a court that still presents a danger and with a father that keeps tripping her path. Can she change the future? Can she give up enough to take her crown? Or will she once again lose to her father's mistakes, her enemies' schemes and her own errors? (Juulna: One of my all-time favourites.)
A Woman Scorned by Shadow_Monarch_14 | E | 96k | WIP | Daemyra, Aemma/OC: After Prince Baelon Targaryen was a miscarriage, Queen Aemma Arryn tells King Viserys I Targaryen that she will have no more children. She has given him a daughter (a heiress) and that should be good enough. Viserys, pressured by his Small Council and his dream of a male heir as well as manipulated by Otto, makes the decision to set Aemma aside and marry Alicent. Aemma, betrayed by the love of her life, agrees… after taking her daughter, Dragonstone and the Islands of the Narrow Sea and the dragons from Viserys and his Small Council. If Otto Hightower wants a dragon King with his blood on the Iron Throne, he'll have to another thing coming.
Ancient Fire by AnaWayne | NR | 198k | WIP | Rhea/Daemon, Jonsa: Bran Stark knew that it wasn’t enough. So he decided to use his sister’s dormant yet growing magic to change the history of the House of Dragons before its fall.
put down that gravestone by darkgods | E | 249k | WIP | Daemyra: they have his mother's eyes, these would-be velaryon boys. not those of their own mother, but his. the king stretches limbs and smiles wide, heedless of his brother's fury mingled with agony, his daughter's frozen gaze. fire and blood has reunited. all must be well. the king thinks nothing of the prince's lack of mourning blacks, for the whole kingdom knew the wife daemon targaryen sought was never found in the vale. ten years after the godsforsaken night in the brothel, daemon targaryen makes his return to court to find it infested with vipers that threaten to coil lethal bodies around his niece. his niece and the nephews that bear his features yet claim the name velaryon. the rogue prince has returned, and a reckoning is set to begin.
Marvel
Some Things Shouldn't Be a Chore by scifigrl47 | T | 22k | Stony, Phlint: Steve takes things like personal responsibility and respect seriously. Tony's got people he pays to take care of that kind of thing, and anyway, he's pretty sure that he's going to die of some exotic disease in his workshop, because Dummy's still a little spotty about what is 'clean' enough to put on an open wound. The rest of the Avengers are in this for personal gain, except for Clint, he just enjoys being a dick. And some things shouldn't be a chore.
Basic Rules by StrivingArtist | T | 7.9k | Tony & Avengers: It said something about Toni’s life that she had an established system in case of kidnapping and torture, and while there had been tweaks, it was still basically the same as from when she was a kid.
Let them underestimate you.
Don’t fight back until you have an exit.
Lie from the start.
Protect what matters.
Assume no one is coming to help.
Tony and the Falcon by ArcticVulpix | T | 10k | IronFalcon: Steve introduced Sam Wilson to Tony Stark after the Fall of SHIELD. He grows to regret that. He grows to regret that very much.
Ramblings by TheSovereigntyofReality | G | 34k | Pepperony, Tony & Peggy: The problem with Alzheimer's is that sufferers sometimes ramble…often with no idea who is sitting with them. Peggy says something that sends Tony Stark on a legal manhunt.
Five Things Darcy Loves About Working for SHIELD by teand | M | 49k | ShieldShock, Phlint: The Bronx was up, the Battery was down and thank freaking Thor that SHIELD provided housing or Darcy suspected she wouldn't have been able to afford to live closer than Vermont.
I (created from fantasies) exist solely for you by Mizzy | T | 62k | Stony: Six years ago, without the Avengers Initiative there to save the day, scientist Dr. Eric Selvig sacrificed himself to save the world, the almighty demi-god Thor was lost to a terrible storm, and vigilante Iron Man – spotted with a nuclear weapon trying to take advantage of the situation – was forever labelled an enemy of SHIELD. This is a comic book office AU, where Steve is defrosted a year too late, Thor has forgotten who he is, and no one knows Tony is Iron Man. Also includes: office pranks, inappropriate post-it notes, and superheroes who like pina coladas and getting caught in the rain.
The Mechanic, The Soldier, and The Captain by AvocadoLove | M | 6.4k | Stuckony: HYDRA need a replacement for Zola’s genius, and they have years worth of experience breaking and brainwashing a good man into something they can control.
The Evidence by StrivingArtist | T | 16k | WinterIron: Didn’t notice. Right. Sure. Two brilliant minds, two super spies, and a god didn’t notice when the chattiest man they knew stopped making sound. They just seemed happier than before. Brighter and more cheerful than before. They just seemed like they were more comfortable with him around when he was stone silent. Fuck it. He knew they noticed. And he knew they liked him better this way.
In Which The Winter Soldier Might Just Be Wooing Darcy by Out_Of_Custody | T | 28k | WinterShock: Exactly what it says on the tin. (Prompt-Fic) (Juulna: I adore this fic!)
Blood Stained by QueenVee1 | NR | 313k | WinterShieldShock: With a war on the horizon, the Avengers mend bridges that had been burned, relationships are rebuilt, and new friends forged. After a chance encounter with Steve Rogers, Darcy Lewis figures she's had her fill of Avenger-related activities. Turns out she's more entrenched than she ever thought possible. When she forms an unlikely friendship with James "Bucky" Barnes, she thinks her life can't get any weirder. Spoiler alert: IT CAN! A (double!?!?) meet!cute and secret!sibling story! They said it couldn't be done. B**** YOU THOUGHT!
Shadow & Bone/Six of Crows
Quiet Miracles by goatsandgangsters | G | 10k | Darklina, Zoya & Nikolai & Alina & Aleksander: Alina knew miracles. She was no Saint and no savior, she knew this. But she knew the light in someone’s eyes when they smiled. She knew the warmth of an arm slung around her shoulder, the squeeze of a hand, the elbow in her side, the tight squeeze of an embrace. She knew the moment the room held its breath and then broke into the brilliant cascade of laughter. She knew the glimmer of tears wiped from her cheeks by careful fingers. Alina knew miracles. Ravka had never been so full of them. Or: sometimes a government is the beloved sun saint of the people, a young king determined to fix what has long been broken, the eminently practical head of the newly formed Grisha council, and the heretic who’s no longer going it alone.
Without a Mouth I Can Swear Your Name by tothewillofthepeople | T | 32k | Wesper, Kinej | Helnik: Kaz looked at Matthias coldly. “What do you want?” “I want to know where Wylan Van Eck is,” Matthias said. (A Six of Crows Hogwarts AU)
Star Trek Discovery
Respite series by Alethia | E | 22k | Michael/Pike: The Terran Pike comes to visit the newly-resurrected Captain Burnham on the Shenzhou and things get…heated.
Stargate Atlantis
Desert Rose by mific | E | 18k | McShep | John, a downed Hurricane pilot in WWII, is rescued by Rodney who's tracking strange energy readings in the Sahara. And in another life, their story makes another John and Rodney unwilling Atlantis celebrities.
Ted Lasso
At the Right Time by Annaelle | E | 25k | RoyJamie: Roy doesn't like to think he's taking advantage of Jamie. He's making him better, stronger, faster, a better player, and now that he's got the fucking muppet actually behaving for him, he'll be damned if he lets him go. For the PepPerVerse Bottom!Roy Challenge.
The Hunger Games
The Victors of District Twelve by DustyAttic | G | 49k | Everlark & Lucy Gray Baird & Haymitch: night What if Lucy Gray survived that night in the woods with Snow? What if she made it up north, found those people rumored to be surviving without the Capitol, and realized District Thirteen wasn't quite as obliterated as she'd been taught? And what if, sixty-five years later and after watching a certain Mockingjay end Snow's reign, she came back to District Twelve? This is the story of Katniss and Peeta meeting Lucy Gray Baird, and learning her story-- the story that Snow so desperately tried to erase.
The Locked Tomb
Your Necro Questions Answered by Magichorse | T | 8.8k | Griddlehark: Syndicated columnist "Nav the Cav" offers a sympathetic ear to cavaliers across the galaxy and dispenses practical, no-nonsense, real talk advice on how to properly manage and care for your necromancer.
Cake by the Ocean by zoicite | T | 15k | Griddlehark: Okay, so the thing was, Gideon had always been shit at plans. She knew that. Everyone knew that, but this--she really didn’t think it would be this hard! Gideon’s voice was like the least memorable thing about her. Bargaining her voice for a well-shaped set of human legs--that really should have worked in her favor.
who ya gonna call? by igneousbitch | E | 24k | Griddlehark: (Casual sex and paranormal investigation. Not necessarily in that order.) (Or: the Buzzfeed Unsolved AU in which Gideon is ready to fight a ghost, and Harrow just wants to be haunted.)
Behind the Locked Door by UnseelieWench | T | 98k | Griddlehark: It figures that the only college with the badass Cavalier program is also the college that Harrow Nonagesimus wants to attend. Oh well. Campus is big, right? She'll probably never see that pointed little face again.
The Mummy
Best Laid Plans by kyaticlikestea | T | 6.6k | Ardeth Bay/Jonathan Carnahan: After 20 years of being subjected to more yearning than any sister should ever have to witness, Evy decides that enough's enough.
Wednesday
A Torment of the Mind by cherrybirch | M | 58k | Wenvier: In which Wednesday and Xavier sign up for Hermione’s course in Legilimency. Two overdramatic darkness-loving teens with crushes on each other, trying to master their psychic powers by learning to read each other's minds… what could go wrong? NOTE: Canon non-compliance has been tagged for three things: Hermione’s presence at Nevermore, Larissa acting as principal (as if nothing happened), and the complete removal of the stalker subplot. (I find stalkers terrifying and don’t want to write about one.)
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sgtjamesrogers · 1 year
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Make It Up To You
a between-scenes ficlet for 3.10: International Break | roy x jamie | roy x keeley
i'd been saving this bit for later on in my series but since it doesn't work for my plans post-3.10, please enjoy it cleaned up and contained in this ficlet. :) let's place this while roy is working on his apology chicken scratch letter, but before he gives it to her.
“Do you…want to come inside?” 
Roy leans heavily on his good leg, hands at his hips, and scuffs his foot against the pavement. He shakes his head, mouth tightly pressed closed. The sky is a milky early morning blue; a post-dawn sort of blank slate that casts the shadows of Jamie’s face in a strange greyscale.
Jamie frowns, stepping outside as he closes the door behind him. “You sure? Because you look like you’re about to throw up.” 
“I’m a really shit boyfriend,” Roy bursts out, hands still on his hips, his whole body tense for a blow. Jamie just looks at him like there must be something else Roy has to say, so Roy gropes wildly for more words, each of them like holding a lump of hot coal barehanded to get out. “No, really, I am.” 
“An’… so am I?” Jamie says, head tilting as a furrow appears between his brows. “What’s your point?” 
“But you’re not, that’s the thing,” Roy continues, gesturing angrily with one hand. “That’s the whole fucking problem. You’re not, and you haven’t been for a while. I don’t think you’ve been Jamie ‘only out for himself and fuck the rest’ Tartt for months and months and fucking months now. You just pretend to be sometimes. It’s like… like a joke you’re having with yourself, or, or a fucking mask you wear.” 
Jamie goes very still, hands in the pockets of his joggers. Picking his words carefully, he says, “Ain’t that a good thing, Coach? Being a good person? Thought that’s what everyone wanted.” 
“Just listen,” Roy grits out, and hates how it sounds like a plea, like he’s begging. “You are, and you should be, and it’s… it’s good. Catching you being kind is like, a sort of.” Roy swallows. “It’s a gift.” Somehow it feels like almost too much to say, especially after turning up for fucking 'Uncle's Day' and getting subjected to the sort of multi-front emotional terrorism on par with Never Let Me Go.
Roy has always thought that Jamie wore all his emotions right on his sleeve even back when he was being a self-centered idiot; the way he could pout like a toddler or happily gambol like a child on the first day of the summer holidays. But there’s something trembling and complex unfolding across Jamie’s face right now, Roy can’t parse what it means but it’s taking his breath away. 
Finally, Jamie asks, “Like I said Coach, that isn’t a bad thing, is it?” The way his voice turns up at the end makes it sound like could be a bad thing somehow, if only Roy explains exactly why. As if Roy could say that the best training was walking on his hands from nine am to six pm, or gravity went up instead of down, and Jamie would agree because Roy’s the one saying it. 
It’s a heady concept; something that alarms Roy even as it speaks to some greedy little grasping monster that’s wound through his guts. It’s a different quality of pleasure, knowing how much weight his words have with Jamie, and it makes Roy a little ashamed. 
“Of course it’s not,” Roy responds, and that greedy little monster gives a kick as he watches Jamie relax. He shifts his weight nervously from foot to foot, backing Jamie closer to his front door with his hands out like he’s calming a wild animal. “It just feels like, like fucking everyone’s motoring along, being better fucking versions of themselves, and here’s me, just… spinning my fucking wheels.” That’s not all there is, but Roy can’t get any of his other words in order; something flustered and too honest twisting up his tongue. “It’s like all I can do is dig myself deeper.” 
A cheeky expression plays at Jamie’s lips as he says, “Well, y’know what they say about finding yourself in holes.” 
Roy squints at him. “Is this some kind of dirty joke?” 
Jamie tips his head back against his front door and rolls his eyes, and something about the arched motion of it makes Roy burn and avert his gaze. 
“Nah, just that… if you find yourself in a hole, you should probably stop digging, yeah?” 
Roy feels like his strings have been cut, the tension holding him taut disappearing. Jamie’s not wrong, but the truth of it feels at odds with what Roy really wants. When he lifts his eyes back up, Jamie’s still looking at him like he’s a bomb that might go off if only he says the wrong thing. Horribly, Roy knows he’s not even wrong about that, either. 
He sighs. “Not that I’ll be regularly taking your advice about holes, but I guess I could take it under consideration.” 
Jamie looks up at him through his lashes. Roy feels like he could count them individually if only he had enough time. There’s a puff of his breath in Roy’s face, warm and vaguely minty. Roy doesn’t know what to do with his hands, and Jamie just…waits. The sun continues its inexorable journey into the heavens.
Finally, Jamie asks with a cartoonish waggle of his eyebrows, “But. You’re taking my advice about holes today, eh?” 
Roy reaches down past Jamie’s hip, twists the doorknob, and lets Jamie Tartt fall backward into his own house. 
“I fucking said it’s under consideration,” he spits a little childishly, and steps over him inside. 
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