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ginnsbaker · 2 months

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fic: if i bleed (you'll be the last to know) (6/?)

Part summary: "You like Leigh, and that should be that. It shouldn't stop your world from turning, but it does."

Pairing: Leigh Shaw x Fem!Reader | Word count for this part: 5.520 | Warnings/Tags Unrequited feelings and pining | Author's Note: Thank you so much for the warm reception to this story :) I can't promise that this is the last bump in the road.

“Thanks for meeting me.”

You came in early, already nursing a Mai Tai, having decided that facing this conversation sober wasn’t an option. The alcohol doesn’t make the situation any less twisted, but it dulls the edge of frustration just enough to keep you seated.

“Let’s get right to it,” you start, not bothering with pleasantries as you take another swig. “Danny.”

He winces slightly at you calling him by his real name, a telling sign of guilt or maybe just discomfort. It’s hard to tell. “Yeah, about that—”

You're not here for the runaround. Hence, the Mai Tai and the vodka that came before it.

“Look, Nick, or Danny, or whoever you are today. I just need some answers—”

“And I’ll give them to you if you promise me one thing.”

You raise an eyebrow, utterly flabbergasted by his nerve. “I'm not here to make any deals,” you state flatly. “I'm here for answers that I believe Matt owes me. And since he’s dead,” you say, not shying away from stating the grim reality in his face, “and you're in on Matt's little game, you owe me too.”

Danny looks like he doesn't want to challenge you on that; in fact, he looks downright worried.

“Please,” he implores. “This is important to me.”

Your eyes narrow in suspicion. Why is he suddenly acting like a dog with its tail tucked between his quivering legs?

“Okay, what is it?” you ask, signaling the bartender for another drink. Danny orders a drink for himself—a shot of whiskey. That's when you realize things are likely to get even crazier for you before they start to improve.

“It’s Leigh,” Danny says, and something in the way he mentions her name lets you know he's sincere about how important this is to him. “She doesn't know the half of it. She doesn't know I’m Nick, or that I helped Matt to... to be with you.”

You blink several times, rapidly, trying to clear the little haze in your head because you can’t believe what you’re hearing. He's asking you to keep a secret.

After he lied to you.

“And what, if I tell her you pretended to be someone else and helped her husband cheat on her, then what? She's—” you stop mid-sentence, the pieces suddenly clicking together in your mind. Danny doesn't want you to rat him out for being Nick, about his direct involvement in Matt's cheating, because he's… with Leigh?

They’re together?

As if he's tuned into your thoughts, Danny confirms your hunch. “I love Leigh. I think I always have. And if you tell her this, it's going to be the end of us.”

The first thing you feel is this urge to be all possessive about Leigh, coalesced with a sour taste in your mouth knowing someone else got there first. Except, you know Leigh would never look at you like that. So, it embitters you even more admitting you shouldn't be feeling this way at all.

You take a long sip of your newly arrived drink, buying time to think. Telling Leigh is supposedly the right thing to do, but it could also destroy whatever happiness she's found with Danny.

But is she though? Is she happy with Danny?

“So let me get this straight,” you say, the alcohol lending you a blunt courage. “You orchestrated this whole scenario—Matt meeting someone else—just so you could break him and Leigh up? You love her so much you'd do that to your friend?”

Danny looks even more defeated—as he should when he reveals, “Matt's not just some friend. He's my brother.”

You're midway through a sip of water when the words hit you, and you nearly choke on it, barely stopping yourself from spitting the water out.

“You’re despicable! And to think that—”

“But I didn’t orchestrate anything, okay? Do you think I’m some kind of god, picking you randomly to throw at Matt? You guys really met and fell for each other by chance. I had nothing to do with both of your feelings.”

You scoff, incredulous. There's no way you're going to believe anything he says next. You just can't.

“So, your big plan was what? Just to hang back and hope to catch Leigh on the rebound?” you say defiantly.

The look he gives you, and the fact that he’s not outright denying it—

“Look,” he drones, raising a hand as if to temper your barrage of questions. “There was no plan, all right? Matt met you, and he just couldn't shake you off his mind. It was all him. And yeah, it was merely chance he saw you again, going into your clinic that afternoon. He told me about it, and I went with him to talk to you because he asked me to. I was just as thrown when he introduced me as ‘Nick’.”

You're skeptical, to say the least. “Why would Matt do that? Why go through all that trouble?”

Danny shrugs. “I’m not sure, but I went along with it. Probably because deep down, Matt knew what he was doing wasn’t right. Maybe he felt guilty, or maybe he wanted to be someone else in that moment, someone who wasn't Matt Greer with a brother named Danny, who was at his wedding to Leigh Shaw. I don’t know. I mean, I know my brother, but that doesn’t mean I understand all his reasons.”

A sick part of you can't help but feel less sorry about Matt's demise. It's a disgusting thought, harboring anything less than sympathy for someone who's gone, yet you can’t feel anything but enmity for being duped. Not just by one, but two people who played you for a fool.

“God, what a mess,” you mutter, shaking your head. No amount of alcohol could’ve prepared you for this.

And then another thought occurs to you.

“You were the one who told Leigh about me and Matt, weren't you?”

Danny doesn't respond immediately, his gaze dropping to his lap.

“And you did it... to get Leigh for yourself. To make her hate Matt, hoping she'd turn to you,” you piece it together, one after another.

“No,” he counters quickly. You smirk into your cocktail, as if you've just heard the punchline of a joke.

Danny looks up, his dark eyes earnest, almost pleading for you to understand. “I didn't tell Leigh about you and Matt because I wanted to ‘have’ her. That... that wasn't it. That thought came much later, and honestly, only after Leigh started... showing interest in me. I never pursued her, not after Matt died. I kept my distance, respected her grief. I loved her quietly, without ever letting on.”

You look away, knowing a thing or two about loving someone in the shadows.

“I told Leigh because if she was going to mourn Matt, she deserved to know the full truth about who she was mourning. Matt wasn't just the loving husband she thought he was, and she had the right to know that,” he finishes.

You shake your head, dismissing his attempt to appear noble by betraying his own brother and tarnishing Leigh's memory of him. It just doesn't sit right to you, using someone's absence to get ahead. Matt's not here to tell his side, to explain things. His only defense being crumbs of himself he left behind like those texts Leigh stumbled upon on Danny's phone.

With a tad of vendetta in your words, you turn Danny’s reasoning against him.

“Then Leigh deserves to know about you too. About how you were a willing participant in Matt’s deception and helped him pull one over on her,” you tell him, not missing the shock that flickers across his face. “She deserves the truth if she’s going to be with you. Not just your cleaned-up version where you come out looking like the good guy.”

Danny's face goes a shade paler, and for a second, he looks like he's about to argue, but then nothing. He just sits there, kind of deflated, like he's finally realizing the predicament he's in isn't just going to disappear.

You've had enough of his excuses and signal the bartender for the bill. As you pull out your wallet, Danny finds a bit of his backbone again.

“It'll be your word against mine,” he laments, twirling the ice in his glass leisurely. “Me and Leigh, we've known each other for years. Who do you think she'll believe? Because from what I understand, Leigh caught you in a lie too. She doesn't trust you. So good luck trying to ruin our happiness just because you can.”

His challenge makes you bristle, but you square your shoulders, meeting his gaze dead-on. “Do you think Leigh loved Matt?” you ask.

Danny looks momentarily unsettled by your question, as if it's the last thing he expected from you. But then, without hesitation, he answers, “Yes.”

“Yeah, she would've stuck by Matt, even knowing everything,” Danny continues. “She'd convince him they could start over. Leigh loved... loves Matt so much,” he corrects himself, a bitter smile on his lips as he admits, “I envied my brother for that.”

The bartender slides the bill over, and you hand off your credit card without even a second look, thoroughly pleased with how Danny’s response has played right into your hands. Once you’re done paying for your drinks, you turn back to Danny.

“You latched onto the idea of me and Matt right away, not knowing if I’m going to love Matt the way Leigh loved him, or even more. But you didn’t care,” you say evenly. “All you saw was an opportunity to get the woman for yourself. You’re selfish.”

Danny’s quick to defend himself this time. “You wouldn't say that if you were in my shoes,” he shoots back. “I love both of them. I wanted Matt to be happy, and he wasn't anymore, not with Leigh.”

“And you were more than happy to nudge him away from his wife, thinking that'd fix everything?” you counter sharply.

He squirms in his seat, looking like he’s run out of excuses. He can’t find the words that’ll make you see his side of things. It also dawns on you that he’ll never see your point either.

After a tense silence, he asks, “Are you going to tell Leigh?”

You stand up and let out a heavy sigh. “Honestly? I don't even know if Leigh wants anything to do with me anymore.” Just as you’re about to leave, something compels you to throw Danny a lifeline and you swivel on your heel to give him one last thing to think about.

“If this thing you have with Leigh is real, don’t let her find out about the skeletons in your closet from someone else. It's better coming from you.”

Walking away, you can’t shake off the regret of not taking your own advice, more than you’d normally like to admit.

Suzie's been on edge about how you've been acting lately. She's always on the dot with your meals, but you barely give them a glance before packing them up and handing them off to homeless people on the street who need them more. Your days have blurred into a continuous loop at the clinic, skipping breaks, and hovering around even when it's technically Foreman's shift to take the lead.

Today, Suzie's hit her limit watching you mope and brood in your office's corner. Without a word of warning, she marches in with a bottle of red and two glasses. You’re startled, feeling somewhat cornered, as she locks the office door behind her. Ignoring your shock, Suzie starts pouring a generous glass of wine for you, filling it right to the brim.

“Alright, out with it,” she orders, pushing a full glass your way.

Your gaze sweeps the room, looking for a way out. “Suzie, I don’t think it’s—” Yes, you own the place. But owning it doesn't mean you're about to bend your own rules about drinking on the job.

“Let's drink it out, girlie.” She sets her own glass down, already filled, and takes a seat. Last time I saw you like this, your team lost the Superbowl. And let's be real, the only other thing that had you this down before was that Matt guy ghosting you.”

You eye the glass of wine, your mouth feeling very dry all of a sudden. “What about the patients waiting outside?”

“Foreman's on it, as long as we save him some for later. I said we would, but let's be honest, this bottle isn't really enough for two,” Suzie says, giving you a wink.

You let out a sigh, your fingers instinctively inching towards your glass, yet you stop short of actually grabbing it. You're usually the vault, not the one doing the talking. You absorb everyone else's life stories, nod sympathetically, and maybe offer advice on occasion. The only reason Suzie even caught wind of the whole Matt situation is because he made his interest too obvious—showing up at the clinic multiple times with flowers, chocolates, books, and all those little things he discovered you couldn't resist. It wasn't so much you telling her, as it was Matt's grand gestures speaking volumes, making it impossible for anyone, especially Suzie, not to notice.

Taking a deep breath, you realize maybe it's time to open up to someone, to share the absurdity of your situation with someone who might just understand—someone who, at the very least, also likes women.

“Okay, so here's the thing... I've got this weird crush,” you say, letting that sit for a moment, partly because you're still wrapping your head around it, partly because you still can’t believe it. You can't pinpoint exactly when you started tumbling down a rabbit hole from which there was no climbing back out.

“On Matt's wife.”

Suzie's reaction is as you expected—her eyes go wide, her mouth drops, and the wine glass she's holding almost slips from her grasp. “You what?” she gasps, looking at you like you've grown a second head. “How in the world do you end up falling for your ex's wife?”

You never said anything about falling. But you suppose that's how it looks, given how much you've been out of sorts ever since Leigh called you a liar.

Sitting in your car across from Leigh's house, you feel like some sort of stalker. You tell yourself this is a one-off, not a habit you're planning to develop. Though, if you don't catch her tonight, you'll likely be back here tomorrow, or the day after.

After that wine-fueled heart-to-heart with Suzie, you left the clinic with a buzz and her words echoing inside your head: Just walk up to Leigh and say you were an ass and that you're sorry. And here you are, taking her advice a bit too literally and too soon.

It's getting late, and you've been watching Leigh's front door as if it might sprout legs and run away. You're semi-drunk, definitely not in the best state for making apologies, but Suzie's pep talk has convinced you that you need to do this, and now. “This is a terrible idea,” you mumble to yourself, checking your phone again to see if, by some miracle, Leigh has responded to one of your texts. Still nothing.

Just as you're starting to question your sanity and consider driving home, you finally spot Leigh’s car turning the corner. Your heart starts doing somersaults, threatening to beat its way out of your chest as the car pulls into the driveway. But as the car parks and the door swings open, your hopeful anticipation crashes hard into disappointment. It's not Leigh stepping out onto the curb; it's Jules. So, it's a family car, and today, of all days, you didn't get the driver you were hoping for.

A headache begins to brew as you scold yourself for even showing up here. “What am I even doing?” you mutter under your breath, rubbing your temples as if that could erase the last few hours. Leigh might be at Danny's for all you know, making this stakeout even more pointless.

In those few seconds of self-berating, you're completely oblivious to Jules spotting you from the sidewalk. So, when she taps on your side of the window, you nearly jump out of your skin, hand shaking as you roll it down to face her.

“Hi,” she says simply. She’s smiling, like she knows something you don’t.

“I'm not a stalker,” you say defensively. “I'm just…” An idiot.

You weren’t aware you said the last part aloud until Jules chuckles. “Well, at least you’re an honest idiot. You waiting for Leigh?”

“I was, but... I'll just go,” you stammer, ready to make a retreat and save what little dignity you have left.

“You won't get anywhere far on those flat tires though,” Jules comments offhandedly, nodding towards the back of your car.

“Flat tires?”

You quickly unbuckle your seatbelt to check. Sure enough, when you step out and circle to the back, both of your rear tires are depressingly flat, deflated against the pavement.

“Great,” you groan, raking your fingers through your hair and tugging in frustration. “Just my luck.”

You’re not drunk enough to find the situation funny, nor sober enough to deal with flat tires.

“Maybe you should call a tow or something and wait inside the house until they get here,” Jules suggests.

“My phone’s dead,” you say in response.

“No problem, I can call them for you.”

You're chewing over the thought, when your stomach decides to join the conversation with a loud rumble.

Jules grins and adds, “Plus, I've got pizza.” The thought of waiting it out with the comfort of food suddenly makes the idea of intruding a lot less unappealing.

“Why do you even like my sister?”

You're mid-bite on your first slice when Jules launches that question out of the blue and you nearly choke on your own spit. Crumbs dust your fingers as you set the slice down, buying yourself a moment to think. It's not like you've never asked yourself the same question. It's just that the answer doesn't make any more sense to you either.

“She, uh, has a way of making an impression. Mostly, I appreciate her candor—”

“You find her bitchiness… endearing?”

You’re stunned by the way she frames it, but it also makes you smile, recognizing the blunt honesty in her words—something that apparently runs in the family. You guess Jules could say that. Leigh’s sour attitude offended you one time, and then you heard her laugh and saw her smile, and it’s as if the sun never set for you.

“Her... directness is refreshing. In a world full of people trying to sugarcoat everything, Leigh just says it like it is. And yes, it can come off a bit strong, but there's something genuine about it. Plus, she's incredibly passionate about what she believes in. She has this authenticity that’s rare to find nowadays.”

Formidable. You think of the perfect adjective to describe it a tad too late, but you keep it to yourself, thinking you’ve gushed enough about her sister.

“Is that the alcohol talking or do you like, like Leigh?”

It's one thing to harbor a secret crush, quite another to have it recognized and named by someone else, especially Leigh's family. “I don’t—”

“I thought I caught a whiff of red on your breath out there on the street. Here, drink more water,” Jules says, pouring you a tall glass. “I’d offer you a beer but we stopped having those around here because I’m seven months sober.”

“Oh. Congratulations,” you say.

“Thanks.”

She seems to have moved on from her question, getting busy on her phone a moment later, but you haven't, and it leaves you feeling spotlighted in a way you weren't prepared for. “I, um…” You're scrambling for the right terms, something to deflect but not deny. Because the more you've denied it, the more your feelings have grown.

Determined to see you continue to squirm at the kitchen bar, Jules starts talking about Leigh almost casually, as though she's discussing something as mundane as the weather.

“You know, Leigh had a girlfriend in college, before Matt, of course. So, you don't have to worry about her not being interested in girls,” she says, her eyes not leaving her phone screen.

“She did?”

By this time, you're not even sure if Jules is just pulling your leg, and you're baffled as to why she's sharing details about Leigh that Leigh herself probably wouldn't tell you outright.

“Yeah, she was totally into her, just like she was with Matt. Then, out of nowhere just tossed her aside like that,” Jules snaps her fingers, “she completely cut her off. They had been together for two years, and she didn’t shed a single tear over the breakup. So, maybe that's what you should be worrying about,” Jules says, putting her phone facedown on the table.

The pizza suddenly looks less appetizing as you stew over this. It's one thing to worry about whether Leigh could reciprocate your feelings; it's another to consider that even if she did, there’s the reality that it might not go down the way you hope it would, given the chance.

You've always been told you're too much of a dreamer to be a doctor. That became even more apparent when they saw you couldn't help but cry alongside pet owners every time a pet didn't make it or when you had to make that tough call for mercy's sake. You've been in relationships before; after all, you're twenty-eight years old. But you've always treated them like free trials, never getting too serious, especially during those times when you couldn't stay in the same zip code for more than a few weeks. Then, the moment you decide it's time to plant roots, your concept of romance skyrockets to something out of a fairy tale, something as grand as the universe conspiring to unite two souls, forever. It’s how it happened for your parents, being each other’s first loves. You figured, the same should happen for you.

You like Leigh, and that should be that. It shouldn't stop your world from turning, but it does.

“Liking Leigh is moot,” you say after some time. “It’s a bad idea from the start.”

Jules tilts her head. “Why is that?”

You let out a sigh, fiddling with the bracelet on your right wrist. “It’s just... there’s something between Leigh and Danny, right? And it doesn’t usually end up with the mistress and the wife together. Besides, Leigh hates me right now. Most obvious reason being that I stole Matt from her before he... before he was gone for good.”

Jules hums thoughtfully. “Sounds like you've been doing a lot of thinking.”

“It's all I've been able to do since I met her,” you say.

Jules glances at the slice of pizza on your plate, now cold and forgotten. “You gonna eat that?” she asks, nodding towards the lonely piece.

You shake your head, sliding the plate her way. “Good,” Jules responds with a grin. “I'll save this slice for Leigh, then.”

Your ears perk up at that. “You’re expecting her home?”

“Yeah, any minute now. She texted a bit ago saying she was on her way. Plus, she's not working too far from here today.”

“Oh? Where's she at?”

Jules is just about to answer when the front door swings open, revealing Leigh as she hurries inside, her eyes quickly finding yours. There's no mistaking it—she's seen your car. She throws you a pointed look as she heads upstairs, her message clear without saying a word. Then, she murmurs a quick, “We'll talk about this later,” to Jules, who simply snorts in response and starts tidying up the dining table.

The sound of Leigh slamming the door prompts you to rise from your chair, but it's clear you have no plan. Should you go after Leigh? It's precisely why you came here, but now, the wine's effects have faded. Your feet are getting cold.

“You're wrong, you know,” Jules drones, her back to you as she wets a towel under the sink. “About Leigh and Danny.”

“What do you mean?”

She shrugs. “I think she's with Danny as a form of revenge.”

You stare at her back, confused. “For Matt cheating on her?”

“Exactly. Matt was aware of Danny's feelings for Leigh. I knew about it, Leigh knew, and that's partially why she had such a strong dislike for him before she began to... well, you know,” Jules explains, her expression contorting slightly in distaste. “It's kind of absurd when you think about it, especially since Matt's no longer here. But Leigh holds onto her beliefs in the afterlife, so it's like she's putting on a performance for Matt's spirit or something.”

You look up at the ceiling, as if expecting to see through the hardwood floors. “And you're telling me this because...?”

“Because you've given up already,” Jules states matter-of-factly.

You're confused. “So, you don't approve of someone you've known for years, but you're okay with the idea of me, Matt's other woman, being interested in Leigh?”

Jules just shrugs again. “It's weird. Scandalous, even. Something none of us saw coming.”

(In your head, you wonder, ‘Who's ‘us’?')

“But when Leigh was hanging out with you, when you were attending her class, she wasn't with Danny much, I think,” Jules goes on. “And that’s enough for me.”

“You don’t even know me,” you argue weakly. Inside, you're kind of doing cartwheels because Jules doesn't seem to mind that you're into Leigh. Somehow, that feels like a win.

“I know Danny well enough. I've got nothing against him personally, but he somehow manages to bring out the worst in Leigh. My sister was… agreeable when you were around. She actually talked about you, even mentioned she thinks you've got gorgeous brown eyes.”

“She does?”

Jules cracks up, noticing your cheeks go pink. “Oh, absolutely. And I've got to say, seeing those eyes up close—they're kind of striking. Annoyingly so, even.”

Her tease draws a reluctant smile from you, a swarm of butterflies doing somersaults in your stomach. It's comforting to know that there's at least something about you that Leigh notices.

“I should talk to her,” you say with resolve.

“Yeah, you should,” Jules nods, her laughter settling into a warm smile. “I'm not playing Cupid or anything, but I think I like you, Y/N. Leigh could use someone like you around. Most people just back off when her less charming side shows up. When she’s intolerable. I've done it too, sometimes. But I can't really leave her hanging because, you know, she's family and I love her, so…”

Hearing Jules say those things about Leigh transforms her from someone intimidating into someone truly worth sticking around for. And if your feelings eventually lead nowhere and quietly fade over time, then at least you could be the kind of friend to her who doesn't run at the first sign of trouble.

“Jules?” you say, stopping at the foot of the staircase.

“Yeah?”

“I think I like you too.”

Approaching quietly, you've left your shoes by the stairs, the cool floor under your bare feet making you feel all the more vulnerable. Jules had given you directions to Leigh's bedroom—right at the end of the hallway. Downstairs, you hear the murmur of the TV; Jules has turned up the volume, probably more to give you and Leigh some semblance of privacy than for her own viewing pleasure.

When you reach Leigh's door, panic floods back in. You keep swallowing, but it's like the desert in your mouth won't let up. “I got this,” you mutter under your breath, trying to psych yourself up. You lean in, ear against the door, trying to pick up any sound. It's silent until you catch the ping of a laptop, followed by fingers typing away noisily. She might be at her desk, probably by the window, or maybe lying in some awkward, back-breaking position on her bed. Knowing she's awake strips away your last excuse to back down. You lift your hand, pause for a split second, then tap lightly on the door. Your heart's pounding so loud, you're half-convinced Leigh can hear it from the other side.

“Leigh?”

No answer.

“It’s me,” you say a little louder. “Can we talk?”

She doesn’t answer.

You don't want to push her into a corner, to demand her to open up when she's clearly not ready. But walking away without laying your feelings out isn't an option either. With a heavy sigh, you slide down until you're seated on the floor, back against her door. It's a small surrender, but it doesn't feel like defeat. Not yet.

“I know you can hear me,” you say, your voice steadier than you feel. “It's okay if you don't want to talk. Really, it is. But there's just something I need you to know.”

You take a deep breath before the plunge. Here we go.

“Look, you were right,” you start, whispering almost, as if you're sharing a secret with the wood of the door itself. “I did downplay what Matt and I had when you asked me. But, to be completely honest, I didn't even realize I was doing it at the time.” You run your finger along the wood grain of the door, savoring the texture against your skin. Unknown to you, Leigh is on the other side, sitting with her back pressed against the same spot, hugging her knees to her chest.

“By the time you came to me, I hadn't heard from Matt in three months. I was... sober from him, and whatever we had felt like a distant dream. I can’t recall the specifics, just that it was... nice. And maybe intense at the moment, but looking back, it was more about lust and similarities than anything.”

Slowly, you lean your head against the door, closing your eyes as you continue, “I'm not telling you this to make excuses for myself. I don't want to justify the deceit. I just... I need you to understand that any impact he had on me was gone long before you and I met.”

Opening your eyes, you glance down at the space under the door, hoping to see a shadow, a sign that Leigh is right there, listening. She is, but you miss it. The hallway is dark and there’s little to no light coming from Leigh’s bedroom.

You keep talking, now more for yourself than for her. “If there was something real between Matt and me, it wouldn't have vanished so effortlessly. And he... he likely wouldn't have just vanished either, leaving me in the dark without any explanation.”

The door flies open suddenly just as you finish your thought. With no time to react, you're sent tumbling backwards, landing with a thud on the floor. The shock of the fall momentarily stuns you, but it's the sight of Leigh, upturned, that really takes your breath away. Her eyes are hard, her expression unreadable, but it's clear she's been listening to every word.

“You could've mentioned he slept over at your place. Not having sex with him that night didn't mean it was a dismissible detail,” Leigh says, her voice thick. “Do you know how intimate it is to sleep at someone's house and not have sex? To just be there, for the sake of being there?”

You're on the ground, staring up at her. You know it now. Dressing her wounds, that was intimate. Her hand correcting your posture during yoga, that too was intimate. Sharing burgers in the car, intimate.

Whenever you do anything, or find yourself somewhere, just for the chance to be with someone—that's intimacy right there.

“I—I don’t know why I didn’t tell you,” you say. You silently promise to her that lying about your feelings for her will be the last lie you ever tell her.

“You don’t know?” Leigh sneers. “Then think!”

You push yourself into a sitting position, unsure if you should get inside her bedroom or inch back outside. In this position, you're acutely aware of the power imbalance—her standing, you on the floor. It compels you to admit some of your truth.

“I didn't want to cause you any more pain than I already have,” you say softly. “Which is funny because my very existence is likely a constant reminder of that pain.”

Something shifts in the air. You’re the first to look away and you end up just waiting for Leigh to kick you out for good. But she doesn't do what you brace for. Getting a read on her has always been like trying to catch smoke with your bare hands, and it feels like it always will be.

Slowly, Leigh extends a hand to help you up. You take it, feeling the cool dampness of her skin.

Just as she’s about to shut the door again, she stops short, locks her eyes with you, and says, “I can handle pain just fine.”

#unbetad #my writing #my fic #elizabeth olsen x reader #elizabeth olsen #leigh shaw x reader #leigh shaw x female reader #leigh shaw #sorry for your loss au #leigh shaw x you #wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maximoff x you #sorry i had to tag wanda x reader for visibility

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kazoo-the-demjin · 1 year

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Andrew: I'm so tired of this life. I want to be a roomba. I want knives taped to me. And I want to be set loose.

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sturniol0s · 4 months

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dare- matt sturniolo

part 1

matt x fem!reader

a harmless prank wont hurt right?

warnings - use of y/n, no smut…yet,

a/n: back from my break and redoing this series, cant wait to show you guys my new series im starting🔥

y/n’s pov

i was at a party with my best friend until my she got dragged away with a guy who she will probably forget the next day.

i look to my left to see matt walk over to me, me and matt have been enemies since the 3rd grade. it all started because we both were the smartest in the class, once in a while we would get jealous of each other. i may have or have not gained feelings for him ever since 8th grade when he first kissed me for a dare.

matts pov

i was at a party playing truth or dare with my friend group nick, chris, and nathan. “matt, truth or dare?” chris says “um, dare” i say as i look down to my shoes “hm i dare you to pretend to date y/n for a month and then break her heart on valentines day” he says as we all laugh “okay, ill do it”.

i walk towards her as i look back towards my friends smiling. “hey wanna get ice cream or something?” i say nervously “yeah sure” she replys. this is easier than i though just gotta date her for a month now.

i get out the car and ask her what flavor she wants, “what flavor do you want?” i take my card out as i roll my eyes knowing i have to pay for her. “no, its okay i can pay for my self” as she takes her card out of her purse. “no its fine i can pay for you” i insist “okay well ill get vanilla”

as im driving i start thinking about how i don’t have to even tell her that this was just a dare, i can just say i lost feelings or something. “why do you like me all of the sudden?” as she interrupts my thoughts. “because i wanna get to know you” i say as i pull up to the ice cream shop. i didn’t have a better excuse because i cant just say, oh because this is a dare.

as we got back in the car from finishing our ice creams she asks for her to go home, “can you drive me home?”, “yeah of course” i say as i move the car from park to drive. i pull up to her drive way, “thank you!” she says as she starts packing up her things, as shes about to go i kiss her, i can see her turn red as she runs back into her house.

y/n’s pov

• earlier

as were eating the ice cream he wipes the ice cream on my lip. “thank you!” i say as i look down in to my ice cream trying to not make it obvious im blushing. “ugh, im full” i say as i have half of my ice cream left. “ill eat it if u don’t want it” he says smiling at me. “okay here” i say as i hand it to him.

—

We both get back in the car i cant help to smile. “can you drive me home?” i say as i drown in his blue eyes “yeah of course” he replys as he gets back on the road. As we slowly pull up in the drive way i pack up my things “thank you-” i say as i get i interrupted from him kissing me.

i run back to my house i cant help to smile. i go upstairs and change into pajamas. i get into bed and start scrolling on my phone until matt texts me.

part 2?

@chrisloyalgf @sturnsvlg @sturnsjtop @ihearttsyouu @xgsturn @bunnysturns @kiibichio @ghostlypineappl @ihateeveryone357474 @suyqa @iloveneilperry @mbbsgf @heartz4janellieeeeeee @hearteyesformatt @sturnioloslife @delilahluvsu @b2cute @nellyjan-th @jeanieswagger @tillies33ssss @tapesmatts @sturniologirl813 @vane2realz @sturnzsblog @bernardsleftbootycheek @sturniolobessed @samandcolbyfan22 @blahbel668 @mirandakay20 @vinniehackerslefttoe @melonjollyranche @hopefuljellyfishcollection @bluesturniolo333 @sofiabrown1 @iluvm4ttsturni0l0 @tay-laaaaa

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bullet-clubs-bitch · 2 months

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Falling In Love

Nick Jackson X Fem Reader

Summary: Y/n and Nick grew up together. They had been best friends since they were teenagers, trying to make it big in the world of wrestling. Deep down inside Y/n and Nick always had feelings for one another but never admitted it, afraid it would ruin what they had. They both ended up with other people but were never truly happy with their partners. What happens when fate brings them back together and both are single for the first time in a long time? What happens when after 17 years Nick realised he’s still in love with Y/n?

Mentions: of death (reader is a widow), injures,

Main Masterlist (Word count: 2k)

I sat in the private Elite locker room crying into the chest of one my best friends in the whole world, Nick Jackson. We met when I was 16 and he was 17, starting our wrestling journey together, wrestling in the backyard promotion his older brother Matt started. I loved Nick, we spent our whole careers together. He has been there for me through EVERYTHING and I mean EVERYTHING. The past few months have been hectic. The Elite which consisted of myself, Matt, Nick and Kenny had recently made our triumphant return after the whole suspension thing and ever since my life has been a living hell.

I had made my return a few weeks earlier than the boys at AEW’s first Canadian show. I begged Tony Khan to let me do anything on the show. I had been working for years to bring the show to Canada, nonetheless my hometown of Toronto. After countless meetings and paperwork, I somehow managed to show up in Toronto. I still get goosebumps thinking about the Pop I got from the audience. I made an open challenge to fight anyone and Tay Conti answered it. During my match, I somehow managed to pull the muscles in my abdomen. Unfortunately for me, Aubrey Edwards had no choice but to call the match due to my injury. I didn’t want the match to end but I could not stand, and therefore it was out of my hands to make the call.

That was the most embarrassing moment of my life. I’ve wrestled matches with broken bones and had death matches, but I injured myself by botching a tiger roll. I was making my return, trying to put what happened behind me but of course, it’s never that easy. It was even worse when I started crying as I was practically carried out by staff. Out of the 16 years I’ve been wrestling I had only gotten a match stopped two other times. Both of which I was knocked out and had to be carried out on a stretcher because I almost died.

But that was in October, It’s now May and once again I am injured. Nick just held me in his arms and said nothing, knowing I just needed to get this cry out.

“What’s wrong with me Nick,” I said sobbing uncontrollably

“Y/N, there is nothing wrong with you” He replied in a soothing tone

“Yes, there is, how come out of all of my years wrestling I barely ever get injured but ever since I came back all I am is hurt.”

He said nothing

“October, I started crying in the ring which I have never done before and almost gave myself a hernia, February I almost shattered my ankle and I still have this nasty ass bone bruise. Now, It's May and the Doctor told me if my shoulder doesn’t get better soon I might have to get surgery. I can’t be out for months with a shoulder injury”

Nick knew everything I said was true. These past few months have been a rollercoaster of emotions for everyone. The boys regained their Trios championships then lost it and I won the Ring Of Honour women's championship the past December at final battle. Not to mention the unexpected loss of one of our great friends and my baby daddy James. The last thing is the main problem. My mind was constantly thinking of James and that I am a fresh single mother with an 11-month-old was enough to throw me off my game and cause my injuries.

“Y/N..” Nick says my name almost in a whisper “Whatever happens, I just want you to know that I am always going to be here for you. No matter what happens, ok. I love you, always.” He then placed a delicate kiss on my forehead and rubbed my back, something that never failed to help me calm down.

Just then Matt and Kenny walked in. The four of us were family, being there for the highest of highs and the lowest of lows. Kenny was holding my daughter, Elizabeth or as I liked to call her Lizzy. It was the name James picked out, she looked exactly like him. He handed her to me and I held her close to my chest. It pained me knowing she would never get to know her father. She was only 5 months old when he died, my only child, our little miracle, and I had no idea how I was going to do this on my own. Luckily I have some great people to help me get through it.

That night after dynamite I went back to my hotel room, exhausted. Lizzy was upset. There were too many people, it was loud, and not to mention all of the fellow wrestlers wanted to hold her. My little angel was just like her father, not a people person. That meant the evening consisted of me holding her tight as she was wrapped around my chest. Liz wouldn't let Britt or even Dana hold her without crying again so that meant I couldn't make it ringside for the boy’s match. Once I returned to the room and somehow managed to put Lizzy down for bed before having a shower and getting ready for bed. I stood in the mirror looking at my right shoulder, although I was able to move it more (thanks to some crazy rehab) the nasty bruising remained. The “Cody Boob” as I liked to call it as it looked similar to Cody’s torn pectoral. Just as I was lost in my thoughts I heard a faint knock on my hotel room door. I was surprised when I saw Nick standing there.

“Hey” Nick whispered

“Hi” I replied, tiredly

“I just wanted to check on you, see how you are doing. I heard about the little situation with Liz”

“Oh, that. She’s fine. Too many people I guess….Do you wanna come in?”

As I invited Nick inside my hotel room I noticed something different about him. I wasn’t too sure what it was. He was freshly showered, and I could smell the evergreen scent of his body wash on his skin. He wore black sweats, a black T-shirt along with a pair of Jordans. All normal things, yet something was different. Was it the way his icy blue eyes looked at me? Was it the way he leaned on the doorframe? A million different things went through my mind as I finished in the washroom before returning to him. He sat on the bed, flipping through the channels as I joined him, snuggling close to his chest. I must have fallen asleep at some point because when I woke up in the morning he was gone.

Nick’s POV:

As I sat in Matt’s and I’s shared hotel room all I could think about was Y/N. I know how hard things have been for her recently and I was genuinely worried for her.

“And then I was thinking we could do…, are you even listening to me, Nick?” Matt said in annoyance. I didn’t even notice I drowned him out

“Yeah, I think that’s a great idea man” I replied, not even knowing what he had said.

“What’s wrong, is something bothering you?” he asked

“I’m fine Matt, just worried about Y/N,” I told him truthfully

“I think you worry about her too much. If I am being completely honest with you, I have no idea how you two never ended up together. You two wo-” “I’m getting a divorce” I cut Matt off. I could see his face drop at my words.

“What? What do you mean you are getting a divorce?” Matt said confusion and fear all over his face. “A few months ago, I filed for a divorce Matt, I am getting a divorce” I admitted ashamed of myself. “Why?” The tone in Matt’s voice was soft. He no longer looked shocked, he looked almost pained.

“To be honest with you I have no idea”. My marriage had always been rocky from the beginning, that was no secret. The long-running joke on BTE was that one day I would end up leaving my wife for Y/N. Everyone and their mother wanted Y/n and I to get together, they swore at some point we must have slept together but it never happened.

“Do you love her?” Matt asked the one question I had been dreading for years

“Who?” I played dumb

“Y/N, do you still love her?” I may or may not have told Matt that I was in love with Y/N after I was high on anesthetic after surgery a few years back and he’s never let it go.

“I need to get some air” I left before Matt could stop me.

My brain was going a million miles an hour, I just needed some time to think. I didn’t even notice that I ended up at Y/N’s room. I wanted to go back, but it was too late. I knocked quietly on the door. Hoping not to wake the baby up. When Y/N opened the door I felt some relief. Her hair was wet and she was wearing a robe. She must have just come out of the shower. My brain imagined myself in there with her. I mentally cursed at myself for thinking that, she was my best friend. She invited me inside and I sat on the bed, unsure what to do. ‘Why am I so nervous?’ I thought to myself. I decided to find something on the TV while I waited for her to return. Once she returned she rested her head on my chest. We were always very affectionate towards each other (sometimes a little too affectionate) so this wasn’t something out of the ordinary. So why did I feel so nervous?

We didn’t say anything, we just lay in silence. It was calming, I felt relaxed. I was going to move to be closer to her when I noticed she was asleep. Y/N looked so peaceful, so beautiful. Matt’s words replayed in my mind. “Do you still love her?” I always loved Y/N, but did I LOVE LOVE her? For the first time in a long time, the both of us were single. Y/N was the first person to know about my divorce, and her reaction was similar to Matt’s. I wanted to protect her, help her raise her daughter, I wanted her, I needed her, I wanted to be with her forever, I loved her and I hate myself for not doing anything about it. For the past 17 years she has been in my life and for the past 17 years I have been in love with her. Instead, I ignored my feelings and got married to someone else to ignore my true feelings. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest, my mind going a million miles an hour. I was lost in my own thoughts, a text from Matt broke my trance.

“Where are you?” he asked. Shit, how long had I been gone? I looked at the clock and saw it was almost two in the morning. I wanted to stay with Y/N but Matt wouldn't stop texting me. So I had no choice but to leave.

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vampmattsbae · 2 months

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ABOUT ME !

okkk, if i'm actually gonna start posting stuff, y'all should know a bit abt me.

some music artists I like are dom fike (i'm married to him), lizzy mcalpine, sabrina carpenter, olivia rodrigo, conan gray, beabadoobee, frank ocean, tay swift (don't kill me), the backseat lovers, and billie eilish

i am a raging theater kid and a working model 😋 i am currently in a production of beauty and the beast as madame (the big wardrobe lady) i literally love being onstage it's such a fun experience. making other people happy while making myself happy is like the best thing ever.

i've been a sturniolo fan since around early 2022. like the colby jack era. i honestly can't believe I still like them like normally my phases last like half a year 😭 i went to the charlotte show during the versus tour and matt won that show (WOOO GO BF) i unfortunately didn't get to meet them (i'm too poor) but I was at the show and that was a very fun experience !!

i actually first started writing for the stranger things fandom. (ew) it was mostly bad gay byler shit. i only posted like one mike x reader fic and you can probably find it in the deep depths of wattpad but i'd advise not to. it was so bad. since then i've been journaling a lot and slowly getting better. i'm no shakespeare but i've definitely progressed from the little girl writing stranger things fanfiction in her room. now i'm a big girl writing sturniolo fanfiction in her room 😭 no but seriously i'm excited to start writing again and I hope y'all are too !!

if you have any similar interests as me, or just think i'm cool, please message me ! I don't bite I promise !!

#matthew sturniolo #nick sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #chris sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #matt sturniolo #nicolas sturniolo #nate doe #sturniolo smut

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thesupreme316 · 2 years

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WAAAAAAIT

BECAUSE I HAD AN AMAZING IDEA...

What if we got a Hook x Reader,

and the reader is a former mixed martial artist, who is in the crowd to support him during a pay-per view... and maybe its a match with Sammy and Tay, maybe Tay gets into the match and said reader jumps over the barricade attacking Tay and she (reader) had been secretly signed to aew (surprising Hook)

Everything That I Wanted (Part 1?)

Pairing: Hook x Reader

Word Count: 1087 (my bad playa)

Genre: Fluff, Angst? (If you wanna call it that.)

Warning(s): none….I think. there’s a woman suplexing a man.

Supreme Speaks (like an author’s note): thank you so much for my first headcanon/request!!! I would have made this into a story but I have doubts about my writing skills. this can be a one-shot or it can be the first part of a mini-series, depending.

You were considered one of the best in mixed martial arts, at such a young age. You’ve battled all around the world, going against opponents of various sizes, and winning multiple championships

You built a great reputation for yourself

So when news broke that you were withdrawing from the sport, many people were confused. They didn’t know what you would do next: Music? Acting? Writing?

But you always wanted to be a wrestler and no one knew that more than your best friend Tyler

aka AEW’s Hook

You knew each other since you moved to New York when you were a kid. Ever since then, you and the cold-hearted handsome devil have been inseparable

And handsome he was…

To the point that you started having a crush on your childhood best friend

Maybe it was the way he protected and cared for you, even though you are truly capable of it yourself (obviously). Or maybe he always had late-night conversations with you about the most random topics. Or maybe, and most likely, it was the way he made you feel like you were the only girl who mattered to him

The man makes time for you, gets you matching hoodies, and lets you style his hair.

It started going to the point where people thought you two were dating; which you both actively denied while blushing many times.

However, it’s gotten to the point where you can no longer deny your feelings

When you decided to walk into the world of professional wrestling, Taz, the legendary wrestler, and your best friend’s dad decided to train you and prepare you for the industry

While you have been training for months on end, you were shocked that AEW wanted to sign you.

Finally, you felt like your childhood dreams were coming true. This all leads up to Grand Slam… your surprise debut night

And one of the biggest nights in Tyler’s career; as he was teaming up with Action Bronson (his favorite rapper and idol) against the J.A.S, a group that neither you nor he could stand.

He didn’t know that you were signed yet, but he did know you were gonna be there cheering him on. You sat in the front row, wearing a Hook shirt with a big smile and all, making the crowd pop at just your appearance.

You enjoyed the show; watching all the action and your future coworkers put on hit-after-hit matches. Then…came your best friend making his entrance with Bronson rapping The Chairman’s Intent live

As Tyler walked around the ring, he gave you the most determined look you have ever seen from him. Once he was at the stairs, as he looked around the arena; his eyes fell on you.

You could have sworn you saw them soften before he winked at you and stepped inside the ring

Even though you had a tough exterior, you were a sweetheart, especially when it came down to Tyler

Your heart ended up fluttering a bit before focusing on the match at hand

The match was going great; even though Angelo and Matt were good wrestlers, they just couldn’t one-up your best friend

Eventually, the crowd exploded when both Tyler and Bronson applied a double Redrum. You got up and cheered them as they raised their hands in victory

You couldn’t help but feel happy and proud of Tyler; he deserved every opportunity and achievement that he has

However, that feeling of joy and fluff was replaced by anger and rage as Sammy Guevara and Tay Conti ran down the ramp and attacked the winners from behind

The crowd started to grow louder with boos and obscene chants

You decided not to get involved…that was until…Tay decided to put her hands on Tyler. Even go so far as to slap him.

Neither Tyler nor Bronson would hit a woman, that was uncharacteristic of them

So you did the only thing you could: jump the barricade, slide into the ring, and….

Hit Tay with a clothesline to the crowd cheering and chanting your name. Tay fell to the ground with Tyler looking at you, eyes narrowed with confusion. You just smiled at your best friend before being turned around.

Suddenly, you were face-to-face with Sammy, who was yelling at you: “Who do think you are?! Don’t ever touch my wife again!”

You managed to keep a smirk on your face and your composure as he keep yelling and putting his hand in your face, until, he harshly pushed you.

As you stumbled, Tyler started to make his way to confront Sammy. But you pulled him back, assuring him you’re okay: “I’m okay, I got this!”

“I’m not gonna let him disrespect you!”

“I said got this!”

You turned around to Sammy smirking and with all the strength you had, you grabbed his upper body and performed one of Tyler and Taz’s signature moves, the Tazplex.

As you lifted his body, the audience started to even cheer louder, if that was possible. You got up to see Tyler’s slightly surprised face, he’s never been that expressive anyways.

Looking around, Sammy and the rest of the J.A.S started retreating, screaming threats along the way. He started to say: “What was that? How did you even get in the ring?”

“I’m signed, surprise!” You said smiling. “Now, you have someone helping you with those jackasses.”

Tyler lighted scoffed at you, before engulfing you in a hug. No matter how many times he wraps his arms around you, it always made you get butterflies and your heart starts to beat faster. To ease the moment, you jokingly said: “I told you I got this. You know it’s not your duty to protect me.”

To which he said: “No, but it is my privilege.”

He backed up, grabbed your’s and Bronson’s hands, and lifted them as his theme song started to play in the background.

The audience chanted your name along with Tyler’s. Your smile couldn’t help to grow bigger, taking up your entire face. Tyler turned to you: “Is this everything wanted?”

You looked up at him; your eyes gazing into his brown pupils: “Yeah, it is.” He smirked and ruffled your hair.

But the truth is, you lied.

Yeah, you’re starting a new career, guaranteed money, and have thousands of people chanting your name; you have everything. Except for calling the person next to you, yours.

You looked down at the white mat with the realization that you almost have everything that you wanted, almost.

Taglist: @senditsi @triscillal @wwenhlimagines

#AEW #all elite wrestling #aew imagines #aew headcanon #aew hook #hook x reader #aew hook x reader #hook imagine #aew hook imagine #aew imagine

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