so silly this chapter hahahahhaha

Man why are people on the internet such fucking dickheads. Learnt that my favourite analog horror [The Man in the Suit]'s creator Unknowingly has been bullied to the point he's taking a long break and might never continue the series and it's like. Like how the fuck are you going to bully a LITERAL KID over a analog horror they've made??? Not only is that morally fucked up but the series itself is good. This kid's art has unsettled me far deeply than any other analog horror simply due to its lore, its implications and constant feeling of dread due to The Man in the Suit's presence and just. How he is. For example: Rare Newspaper (1964) was probably the most freaky one to me but I can't put my finger on it. Idk what it was but the idea of a kid seeing a human-sized Godzilla in the road and it being so unsettling that they say "The thing I saw outside wasn't Godzilla. I think it was some man in a suit" implies a whole new level of body horror that a CHILD can identify it as unnatural. Idk I just thought it was cool and unsettling and neat and it pisses me off people think the series is so shit they should threaten and torment the LITERAL MINOR WHO MADE IT. Fucks sake

I think the portrayal of Spider-Man 2099 in Across the Spider-Verse is in-character in that aside from like Shattered Dimensions he's always been portrayed as a bit of an asshole who slips into anti-hero territory at times and generally has a "needs of the many over the needs of the few" mindset and given his specific circumstances in the movie it's not unreasonable to think he could take the actions he does. However it does kinda suck that since like 99% of moviegoers had no idea who he was before the movie came out their first impression of him is when he's in an antagonistic role and people think "antagonist" and "villain" are synonyms so now I'm gonna have to listen to people who've never read a comic saying he's a villain or isn't a real Spider-Man for the rest of time or at least until he inevitably changes his mind in the third one.

post dead space, when isaac is picked up from the escape shuttle and taken to titan station. hard to tell but i based the door in the back on the door of the shuttle like it's docked somewhere and he's being escorted off it

you go to a lesbian blog and find it says women only!! no men allowed!!! and go oh! excuse me, um, what about other lesbians? plenty of lesbians are genderqueer... and they go well, okay, go fuck yourself tim chop off your sweaty dick and stop calling yourself a lesbian. you do not have a dick, actually. you think about that fact often, even though it does you no good. you do not tell this person that.

you go to another lesbian blog and it says women only and you try again, and this time they change it to wlw + nblw only (non-men who love non-men :D). and you'll say hey i appreciate that but gender's not really that cut and dry for a lot of people. someone could be both a man and nonbinary, for instance. i just worry that you're looking at nonbinary as a generic third gender, or an extension of womanhood. i mean yeah you include nblw in your tags but all your posts are about pussy-havers exclusively. what's with that? and they say go fuck yourself you pervy man pretending to be a lesbian. you tried to sneak in but i won't let you.

so you go to a lesbian blog with a dozen or so posts about queer people needing to be more weird about it and you sigh in relief. but you still see the men dni. that's odd. hoping for the best, you say hey! i know you mean well but please maybe don't put men dni at the end of the lovely posts on your lesbian blog bc some lesbians are men. and they'll be like ok!! well you're allowed ;) and you say no that's not. no. some men are lesbians not just me. you think about your own dicklessness and wonder if that's why you were given entry. and you add that even if male lesbians are allowed, there's no indication of that. how would anyone know without asking? and they're like ohh gotcha gotcha well men dni + this is for sapphics only!! and you'll be like ok well that treats the concepts of men and sapphics as mutually exclusive identities and i just told you that's not true and you agreed with me so.. i don't think that solves our problem. and they're like. ok. fine. men dni but genderfluid and multigender people are allowed! and you're like no see that's. that's still the same thing.. you're saying the same thing just with different words. if you don't want men to interact but you're fine with multigender/genderfluid/etc ppl interacting then you either don't see them as Real Men (because they don't reach a standard of Full Manhood) or Complete Men (because they're only Part-Time Men), both of which suggest that they are, in some way, not men or less-than men, which is invalidating and defeats the point of the exception in the first place (accommodation) OR that you don't really mean the dni which is confusing and inconsistent and makes guydykes feel weird and uncomfortable and excluded from the lesbian space you're trying to cultivate. and they're like um. ok. so. cishet men dni? and you're like well i think that makes more sense, but what if someone identifies as both a cishet man and a sapphic? again, if we're trying to accommodate the genderfucky populace then that has to be a possibility that is considered. and they say god you people are never happy. what do you want me to do? what am i supposed to say to keep the right men out? and you pause. you empathize with the need for a space free from dudes trying to fuck you straight and feminine. dudes who watch lesbian porn and joke about what they'd do if they were allowed into girls locker rooms. who look at you like a piece of meat, and like someone who looks at women like pieces of meat in the same way he does. you get it. you know. you want a space where you can be sapphic, too. that's why you came to these blogs in the first place. you brace yourself and you say well i don't know that there are "right men" to keep out. i don't know that there's any single label that would accomplish whatever it is you're trying to accomplish. you could go for "sapphics only" or "queers only" and i think that might be the closest thing to what you want, but it's never going to be perfect. creating any exclusive space is going to shut out people you didn't account for, and the broader the label, the more people will be shut out that you didn't want to shut out. and what about people who don't know if they're allowed? what of questioning transbians, where are they supposed to go? and, frankly, i think i might rather my dykey posts get read and appreciated by a gay guy who sees me as a man than a woman who only sees me as a sacred womb, pure from male perversions or violence or whatever. i think community might just be more complex than a dni can handle. and they look at you and say i don't want to not have a dni. i think you're too permissive. you can't just "what about" or microlabel your way into everything. go fuck yourself, i bet you're not even a lesbian anyway. go find a real problem to get mad about.

you go to a lesbian blog. you ignore the men dni because you know you probably don't even count to them. or maybe you do count and, out of respect for your manhood, they'd shun you accordingly. you try to feel okay about that. you scroll past dozens of posts about mediocre men and gagging at straight friends' boyfriends and how gross and undeserving men are of the beautiful women they couple up with and how all women should be gay so they can get treated right and and and and and. you finally find a post about curling into someone you love and feeling at peace and try to lose yourself in it. you know that feeling is what unites you, what makes you belong. you try to focus on it. you think about carding your hands through a butch's hair or lacing fingers with a femme and feeling warm and loved and more yourself than you ever have before. like this is who you're meant to be. you read about lesboys and butch boytoys and genderfucky dykes and big hairy deep-voiced wonderful women (like you want to be someday, like you wish you could make yourself) and you try to ignore the men dni underneath each and every post. and you daydream about meeting someone kind and earnest at a lesbian bar even though you don't think any such bars exist within three states of you and you can't drink and don't want to drink because you need to be in control of yourself at all times so you don't fuck up like you're always about to and here in the nonexistent lesbian bar you feel wanted and safe and in good company. you picture your ideal, happiest self. it is a mistake. ideal-you has a goatee. not the mascara one you smear on and call drag even though you know it's not drag, not really, the beard you call drag because you think everyone would look at you sadly if you told them it was just to pretend you had something out of your reach. a beard that's soft and that you grew and that cannot be smudged away if you get too comfortable with it. the dream shatters. your people pull away from you, their scoffs mixing with the mind-numbing gay girl bedroom pop you learned to settle for just to have something that almost resembled you, they all pull away and turn their backs and do not look at you. you're too close to being a man now, even though you're the same amount of man as before. and they know you're not supposed to interact with men, not as you would with dykes, at least. and it sours. it's all your imagination, all in your head, but it sours.

you sigh. you think about how small you are. how short, how narrow, how feeble. how your voice pitches up when you talk to strangers because it's easier to speak quietly when it carries more, and because you're nervous. because it's a chore to talk, like everything is. you think about testosterone. you think about how your family would look at you, the questions they would ask, your answers they would only pretend to accept. the uncomfortable glances and whispered questions they'd try to hide from you. you think about how small you are, and how small you will always be. how you don't know of a way to fix it, but even if there was one, no one would want you anymore. you'd be the only one thinking it made you a cooler dyke. you think about how you don't even want a T-voice all the time, how you'll never be able to switch it at will, because you don't know how and can't bring yourself to figure it out. you think about how your throat closes around every hint of your own attraction. how wanting is perverse, how wanting is invasive, how wanting is embarrassing and too vulnerable so it must stay anonymous, as an online witness, and how you can barely manage to form or maintain friendships because your brain makes you pull away, always spinning out and struggling to recover from the simplest of interactions. how they'll all leave you and you won't chase after them at all and how that will hurt them. how stuck you get. how it looks like nothing's holding you back, how that frustrates everyone who thought you were going to be more than you were. the people you love who understand except when it comes to being ghosted, being shut out. how you don't want to hurt them. how you can't tell them that because you're stuck. how you turn to stone when touched, how you never reach out, how you lose your speech and can't look at people, how your autism is fun and sexy until it becomes real and you never see them anymore, how much you longed for someone who knew everything without you having to explain, and who loved you anyway. how unreasonable you know that is to expect of anyone. you think about that not-even-real lesbian bar. you think about how you still can't drive. how you can't leave your home on your own, without dragging somebody into helping you. how you can't leave your body. how you can't leave your manhood behind.

you think about finding another lesbian blog and ignoring everything. about skimming it for the parts you can juice some meaning from. the parts men ignore and don't understand, and how typical of you it is to do so. or the parts where you're not welcome and you should accept that, because it's for lesbians only. how you are a lesbian anyway. how you're meant to choose lesbian or man, how each is a betrayal of some kind to yourself or your people, your family, your lovely strangers, your rare friendly acquaintances. about the parts that tell you you're not wanted, that you're ugly and lazy and gross and insert yourself everywhere without even asking. about the parts that tell you you are hated, and how lesbians are above it all by rejecting men. how lesbians are each blessed miracles. about the parts that say you should be ashamed of being whatever twisted confused freak you are, of everything, of looking and wanting or not looking or not wanting, of picking and choosing instead of taking it all in with a smile. after all, shouldn't you take it? or is your ego too fragile, as men's so often are? aren't you tired? good. we're not here for your consumption. and we sure as hell don't want your company or "community" or whatever. didn't you read the sign? no boys allowed. and if you want to come in you have to make up your mind. as if you haven't told them the only answer you have. you're both. you're both.

you know you broke the rule by interacting.

but it gets lonely sometimes. you wonder if they know.

I need people to talk about the Employers more. Both Half Life and HLVRAI. Because they are fucking FUNNY

are you telling me there’s just a bunch of ugly ass GMEN causing all these problems??? Like I completely believe that but still it’s so hilarious

even the ONE PHOTO I can find of them they just look stupid. They’re stupid they’re a stupid little space group look at them 😭😭😭

ANDREW GARFIELD and QUINTA BRUNSON

attends the 2023 LACMA Art+Film Gala.

how to stop crying: think about those two middle-aged men being in love

i rly think this might be my favorite ever barry pic perfect combo of buried inside a big collar while still slutting it up a little bit. love and peace on planet earth.

do u think we can get hear more (anything) abt jersey kyle drunk off his ass with sober raven??? because i just KNOOOWWW stanley would have a heart attack (in a good way LOL)

oh, you BETCHA, my darling! ;) partially because this is literally my favorite fkn conversation topic ( white boy wasted jersey is my hero ) but also because he is SOOOO chatty when he is drunk, so you Will be hearing it, my friends! that's for damn sure! ( you and all of NYC! )

but omg, i loooove drunk jersey, because, as we know, regular sober jersey is Scary As Fuck and So Mean >:( jersey is cold, no nonsense & if he IS talking to you, he's talking DOWN to you, completely verbally eviscerating you and is making you wish you were never born. ( fun! )

Buuuuut...

/speaking/ of Fun...

druuunk jersey is SO Fun! ;) He's Also Sooo Nice <3 he smiles so much and is SO CutE!!!! AAA!! MY SON! ilysm & like...Okay so he Does need to be babysat bc hes heeelllaaa sloppy smh, but hes mostly just super giggly n ~wiggly~, will talk to you for Hours, gas u up, laugh at EVERYTHING You Say ( hes like a tall male ginger grad student version of those drunk girls in the bathroom who are like fuck him baby!!! he doesn't deserve u!! you're gorgeous! dump his ass! xx )

aaaaaaand...if you're Lucky...

HE WILL TELL YOU SECRETS <3 ;)

( and yes, they are usually about a certain lead singer of a band with messy bleach blonde curtain bangs and...a cute lil Freckle by his eye )

but tldr; 99% of the time, jersey kyle is frightening and a locked box.

hes vicious, surreptitious, calculating & cruel but drunk kyle is a loose fkn canon. HE IS ALSO VERY FORWARD AND VEERRRY HANDSY!!!! he Will flirt with you and by you i mean ravenstan and by flirt i mean...

HIT ON RELENTLESSLY.

AND I DO MEAN!!!!

R-E-L-E-N-T-L-E-S-S-L-Y.

its soo shdsk...& yes he does have a Heart Attack anytime it happens.

actually, in regards to this specific situation, there is a Upcoming part of rm ( *SomeTime* i'm not saying When, you nosy nellies! ) w/ Wine Drunk Off His Fine Ass Jersey Kyle and Rare Sober Ravenstan in it thats soooooooo...i'm gonna give you a lil dialogue right here.

( i'm sorry so much of this is out of pocket, drunk!jersey is So Much, sorry in advance for being cringe and ravesey max security prison )

please note: the occasion is a party ( rager lmao ) being thrown at the crimson dawn manwhoresion. jersey is a solid Ten & dressed to the nines as per usje, lookin FINE in a pair of perfectly pressed black power suit slacks -- you will never catch my man lacking -- matching black turtle neck, the iconic gold sun moon-glasses chain on the chanel shades w/ his long ginger hair beautifully cascadin in waves down v statuesque shoulders idk he looks like a sexy bond villain...

wHICH MAKES SENSE BC HES BEING A /MENACE/ AND SwAyInG SOOO MUCH BC HES *BARELY* HOLDING HIS LIQUOR IN A SICK ORNATE CRYSTAL WINE GLASS SHAPED LIKE A SKULL THAT HAS SUPER FANCY, MINDBLOWINGLY EXPRENSIVE DRY AGED IMPORTED VERSAILLE CHARDONNAY SLOSHIN AROUND IN IT

( ALSO ITS IS LIKE HIS 3RD/4TH GLASS -- GOD HELP US ALL )

SO BASICALLY, HES SIPPIN, SLIPPING, TRIPPING, HIS FACE IS REDDER THAN THE WINE, THE LINE IS BLURRING, HIS WORDS ARE SLURRING AND MOST IMPORTANT, OUR MANZ JERSEY KYLE IS WHITE BOY WAAASTED & LOOKING FOR ( you guessed it )

RAVEN STAN ;)

[ who kyle does NOT know is His Stan, but does know is not Actually asshole lead singer / tmz bad boy raven of crimson dawn but is really soft...and sweet...and lovely and an actual angel aka...His Raven <3 ]

who he finds off to the side, looking very Surprised to see him and far less posh/polished than everyone else, running in a gardening apron, humming under his breath & watering his plants like a good plant dad

( i love him so much, he's so cute, also kyle is down HORRENDOUS )

ANYWAYS! *director vc* ROLL CLIP!

HDKLHSLKDSHDKSLDKDS

THE FUCKING GRINGO ASS NEW JERSEY SLAUGHTER HOUSE BUTCHERED ASF BLACKOUT DRUNK hOOOLLA CUERVO ;))))

im kshdlsad stan is shook but so amused help ALSO THE WAY STAN TRIED TO DEFAULT INTO DOING THE RAVEN VOICE AND KYLE IMMEDIATELY SAID HELL NO NICE TRY BITCH!! -cue the iconic awkward embarrassed too high stan laugh, his lil wave, gentle shyboy smile, nervous lip bite Hi Kyle c': combo- n jersey bein like Mmm <3

yOUR HONOR!!!! THEY ARE IN LOVE I AM SCREAMING!!!! MY BOYS

uhhhh after that...i will say that kyle does end up in ravenstans very comfortable Lap for a second there ( listen Not In A Hot Way...i mean...like it is for jersey and actually it is...Also for ravenstan bc hes blushing, but it was BC kyle was slippin and sliding!! he almost Fell! )

in love....in Hate...anyways...

cue kyle asking Is This Seat Taken >;) and raven like u-um! well now it is, Aha! -sweats- but theres a Chair over there i could g-get it for yo-- and kyles like but im comfy :'( Can I Stay? w the pouty eyelash flutter and ravenstan is like Heeeavy Breathing, basically having a heart and asthma attack like you...can do...Literally Whatever You Want ( smh )

this absolutely thrills jersey kyle who winks at him and is like Thaaaaank You Pretty Boy <3 gazing up at him and giggglin going mmm pretty pretty preeettty boy you are so Pretty wow! like messing with hair and his shirt and stuff omg stan is dYiNG!! and hes trying to be responsible not get rizzed ( its not working rip bc kyle is straddling him and touching him like Everywhere, heeelp like go 2 Jail jersey!!! )

and flustered raven is like th-thank you! but i bet you tell...tell that to all the boys whos laps ur s-sitting in...aHaha..whew! but, uh, ky-kyle you, should, uh? really drink some, uh, s-some Water-- and kyle just interrupts him, runs his finger over stans cheeks and nose, which is brightly and imcrimnatingly crimson dawn red smh smirking like

and you look Particularly Pretty When You Blush, yknow that, raven of crimson dawn? which...whysss that, huh? whats wrong, rockstar boy? *leans up to whisper in ear ommffffg* Am I Makin' You Nervous? ;)

LIKE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! AAAAA!!!!! KYLE WILL YOU CHILL OUT!!!!! UR LITERALLY KILLING HIM! AND HE KNOWS IT TOO PLs

genuinely evil bc sober!raven is not built for social interactions ( even less for displaying dominance in any situation smh Especially Involving Kyle ) so he is like literally about to throw up from stress i'm not even JOKIN so he's like -voice crack- A LiTtlE hahA--Woah New Jersey, w-what are you-- bc kyle is like freakin tr...acing... ravenstans hip tattoos like ooh these are cute ;) How Far Down Do They Go? like TO HELL KYLE!!! GO STRAIGHT TO HELL OH MY GODDDDDDDD

anyways :) so fun :) we have That to look forward to :) ravenstans second funeral lmao...please pray for him, he's gonna need it xx

listen, i'm just gonna say it, like i do not care how unhinged and out of pocket stan is on stage as raven because he is doing it for money/bc he literally has to and also on like 1/5 of vodka...JERSEY ON LIKE 2/3 GLASSES OF WINE IS TEN THOUSAND TIMES WORSE AND HES DOING IT FOR FREE AND FOR FUN!!!! A MENACE!!! HES SO MESSY

like oh my god like sometime after the fic when theyre Hating, i feel like at this point ravenstan gets a lot of his creative control back over crimson dawn but with that is like...a lot of Responsibility so hes p stressed 25/8, he has a lot of paperwork ( rip my dyslexic king ), hes trying to stop drinking and he has to go to a lot of these influencer and executive events which he had to go to Before That but its different bc hes making a name for Himself and not for Raven...

ugh, okay, i love post rm!stan so much, so i'm getting side tracked, but the point was, all of c.d. has to go and kyle and blondies co. usually come bc bebe is not missing her celeb moment are u kidding, tweek is happy to miss work, craig wants to kiss tweek and kyle want to kiss You Know Who...is being massively swarmed by people trying to talk to him...also pls note that kyles been throwing back those little champagne flutes like all night long ( also recovered ed!jersey does like those little appetizers they bring you on platters bc Fancy )

so like halfway through the event/party, Every Time With Out Fail ( jersey is a straight A student; he never fails xx ) hes suuuper tipsy and bored asf...and what is more fun...then another imfamous round of

Be The Super Worst & Fluster The Fuck Out of Your Super Best BF?

yes its hating!styles favorite game n drunk kyle is...Scary Good At It!

so he 100% comes up behind ravenstan having a Mocktail! whisperin

actual tipsy menace jersey kyle: heeeeey sexy, nice legs, what time do they open *slips hand into stans pocket smhhhh*

super stressed out already flustered ravenstan, hissing over shoulder: yérsey, póratate bien. ( HEEEEEE LP )

kyle, who is listening, but Naught Listening & fucking w/ his collar: stan, i know that was supposed to be scary, but you know it makes me Hot when you--

( when i tell u this happens Regularly...smh...nasty boy behavior! )

stan, trying to be stern, actually dying: KYLE. *stress intensifies*

kyle being SO FUCKING ANNOYING AND SMUG: my Name sounds pretty good in your mouth, marsh. Wanna Try Something Else Ou--

raven, about to start screaming: kYLE BE!HAVE! i have STUFF to Do!

jersey, literally flicking the gigantic cross earring like a cat, tracing the side of kyles face tRYING TO KISS HIS NECK!!! GO TO HELL KYLE!:

So Do I ;)

kyle, Not Done Yet: and i aaaaam behaving if i was Not behaving my hand would be Down your Pants, which...there's still time for that. btw have i told you how good you look in those pants? ;)))))) ( jail ) you should model them for me, celebrity boy. theres a coat closet~ five minutes. these stiffs wont miss you but iiiiii do. <3 so whaddaya say? actually You don't have to say anything! just sit there and look pretty <3333 you're good at that. pluuuus, i can do that thing you like with my to-

JAAAAAAAAAAAAIL!!!! FOUL!!!!! IM SCREAMINg

LIKE NOT THE THING!!! NOT THE COAT CLOSET OH MY GOD...

But Sigh...

Yes The Coat Closet, I'm Afraid.

( it was not 5 minutes btw...also...all those coats need to be washed )

no standards. smh. nasties. enjoy jail. And Hell.

-uncle nina, ceo of drunk!jersey!kyle and horny boy maximum security prison *sprays drunk kyle w the Holy Water Bottle*

Me thinkin springtrap was hot in 2016 is rlly comin back 2 bite me in the ass rn

Guide on How To Lose Your Libido as a Yannis Girlie*

open Foals’ youtube channel

click on any music video from the Antidotes album

pay close attention to Yannis’ fuck-ass fringe and lack of flavour beard

laugh at him for being a twink

You’re done!

Presumably Geexplus Photoshoot | 2020

normally I'm not a fan of clip show episodes buuut I'm really enjoying the ones in season 6 of Night Court.

not just because of all the Dan stuff but... okay only 99% because of that.

also "not sleazy but ethically questionable in regards to women" - oh Daaan 🙄