#sonny is still gay but i enjoy the rest
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i really did try going into the victim lore with a positive mindset yesterday i swear
#im p sure i even said to scout before i went in 'idk what they could tell me at this point that will be deeply upsetting itll be fine'#its like. danny was good.#connie is gay and thats kinda all we got which slay but ok#sonny is still gay but i enjoy the rest#julie is a trashfire dump#its very clear they love leland the most lol anyway#ana was. ugh...#feel like i get what they were trying for but it just doesnt work when u frame it like that
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*crashes in*
Answer all of them (or as many as you want) for Cyber I dare you. We must spread the swirly man brainrot
🖤 How cold-hearted are they? Do they have a secret or soft side? Why or who with?
He can be very cold hearted, but to specific people. Usually ones who wrong him or his closest personal circle. Sometimes strangers if he doesn't like their vibes. Otherwise oh my god is this little gremlin a mush. He's a hopeless romantic and he's very affectionate because of his deprived childhood. His husbands and the people he trusts the most get Softie Privileges. So like, Physxaas, Lyniaas, Miriam, Alexander. His immediate circle.
🎶 Do they have a theme song/song you associate most with them? Why did you pick this song?
This bitch has a whole playlist. It's full of his energy be it the chaotic whore part, the scary demon prince part, or a flavor of trauma he has.
💋 Do they have a lover? If so, who are they and what are the dynamics? If not, are they a flirty type of person or see it as pointless?
He has two, Wylmas and Kraum. He and Wylmas are the most domestic, precious gays ever. He and Kraum are simultaneously the two kids you never put near each other in class, and a couple of pompous Disney villain wannabes (affectionate). Cyber is an absolute flirt and hopeless little lust machine.
💥 Are they much of a fighter or do they rely more on strategy? How so?
He bounces between both. It purely depends on circumstance, opponent, how much time he has to think, and his emotions. If you've brutally pissed him off then there's no strategy, just carnage. Wrong him slightly? He'll be plotting and you'll never know until it's too late.
🤗 Do they have a best friend? Are they still friends and does the friend know who they truly are?
His bestie is Sonny, and given that she carried his, Wylmas and Kraum's daughter and gave them a max of 4 more times she'll do it again? Yeah they're still besties. She has his kneecaps at all times, he can't hide shit from her.
🍼 Do they have any children, do they like children? Why or why not?
Oops I answered this early. Well to elaborate, he originally didn't want kids out of fear of perpetuating a family cycle of abuse. But he didn't. Wylmas broke him with the cuteness of tiny baby clothes and baby demon purrs and now they have their daughter Miriylia. On top of that, he has at least 3 bastard children from all his whoring and surely more than that, which he's now ready to be a father to if they so choose. His feelings towards kids are complicated, but his little ball of kitten noises of a daughter is quickly pushing him to the side of liking kids.
😆 What kind of laugh do they have? Is it deceiving or fitting?
He has a Selection of laughs. The evil bitch cackle. The charming bastard chuckle. The genuine laugh at something funny. The crackhead wheeze. They all fit him well, but the cackle is without a doubt the most fitting.
👣 What do they do when they're thinking? Do they pace, write things down, make thought boards?
A little pacing, a little writing, maybe spitballing plots with Kraum. Some thoughtful hums or shithead looks that give away he's up to no good. Or a thousand yard resting bitch stare that'll intimidate the shit out of anyone.
🥣 Do they have any domestic skills? what are they? If not, how come?
This man can cook so good you'll wish you could fuck the meals he makes. He likes to garden but that's more Wylmas's thing. He can sing and play instruments if you count those as domestic. Honestly Cyber's a helluva trophy husband, he even enjoys cleaning to a certain degree when you'd expect him to scoff like the royal priss he can be.
💕 Do they do good with intimacy or is it something they're afraid of? Explain.
He's fantastic at all aspects of intimacy, except sharing his vulnerability. Aforementioned family cycle abuse said Emotions Bad so when he's feeling depressed or scared, he bottles that up or buries it in booze and sex and hopes it'll go away. Wylmas is good at coaxing him out of that shell though, and Miriylia's birth has been motivating him to solve problems without a bottle.
🌫 How chaotic are they? How destructive can this be?
I made this man to be a villain. He's a very dark shade of gray morally. Even if he wasn't, he's an extroverted whore with magic that can take him just about anywhere he wants, which has given him lots of friends in lots of places over the 220+ years he's been being a menace. There is LOTS of chaos stored in this twink.
🔥 How hotheaded are they? How come?
He can be very hot headed, but he tries not to be. It's a natural demonic temperament, on top of that family abuse cycle teaching him No Sad, Only Rage. He's fighting for his life to unlearn it, and this is partially what's had him scared of being a parent for so long.
🥀 Do they feel broken? Why?
I think if you asked him this, he'd freeze. He's never thought of himself that way, except maybe during the whole Thing(tm) with Wylmas I'm not about to unpack on Tumblr like this. You could call him broken to a degree, but he's put the pieces back together into something different and better each time.
🥪 What meal do they eat when they don't have much time?
You better believe he's pounding down soup or a sandwich. Quality bread if he's REALLY on a time crunch. He's in a rush but he ain't settling for no bagged grocery store loaf shit.
And for anyone oblivious to my favorite brainrot goblin's existence, here's my beloved little criminal in question:
Art all by @bunchofdoodlesinspace, who also owns Kraum. :)
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Good morning! I hope you slept well and feel rested? Currently sitting at my desk, in my study, attired only in my blue towelling robe, enjoying my first cuppa of the day. Welcome to Too Much Information Tuesday.
Stephen King's son is called Joe King.
Stressed men prefer big butts. (Stress-free men too!)
Only 28% of people know when they're being flirted with.
Men who vape are more likely to suffer from erectile dysfunction.
The Merchant of Venice is the only Shakespeare play to mention Mexico.
In 2019 there were still 17 US States where it was legal to fire someone for being gay.
The revolving door was invented by a man who hated holding doors open for women.
Cutting people from your life does not mean you hate them, it simply means, you respect yourself.
Not only do mosquitoes bite you and suck your blood, but they also urinate on you before flying off.
The scrotum water frog of Lake Titicaca is on the verge of extinction due to its use as an aphrodisiac.
In March 2014, an Australian Python swallowed a chihuahua and found itself chained to a kennel.
‘Mr. Brightside’ by The Killers was the first 2000s song by a group to surpass one billion streams on Spotify.
According to astronomy, when you wish upon a star, you're actually a few million years late. That star is dead. Just like your dreams.
In 2021, an invisible sculpture was sold for $18,030. Artist Salvatore Garau says his work should, “activate the power of the imagination.”
Charles Darwin thought the menstrual cycle was evidence that early humans lived by the sea and synchronised their lives with the tides.
After King Charles II's wife is said to have caught him picking flowers to give to another woman, there have been no formal flower beds in Green Park since 1660.
In 2017, a Boston man got revenge on his high school bully by sleeping with his mum after he saw her profile on Tinder and hooked up with her for a one night stand.
As we get older, we often feel music used to be so much better because of the 'reminiscence bump', a preference for songs that were popular during our formative years.
Carrie Fisher, who played Princess Leia, and James Earl Jones, who provided the voice for Darth Vader in Star Wars in 1977, met for the first time on a 2014 episode of The Big Bang Theory.
In 1995, a man named Sonny Graham received the transplanted heart of a suicide victim. He then married the donor's wife and later killed himself, in the exact same manner as the donor did.
In 2004, Gary Webb, the California reporter who first broke the story of CIA involvement in the cocaine trade, was found dead with two gunshot wounds to the head. His death was ruled as “suicide”.
Joe Metheny, the infamous serial killer from Baltimore, not only cooked his victims to eat himself, but he also made burgers with their remains and sold them to unsuspecting customers from a roadside food stand.
The marine biologist Joel Hedgpeth was the founder and sole member of the Society for the Prevention of Progress. He rejected all membership applications because “growth in members would represent progress.”
In 1969, Salvador Dalí, the Surrealist painter, gave a derelict castle to his Russian-born wife, Gala, as a present. She welcomed his generosity but also set rules for her new home in Púbol, a village in Catalonia. He could only visit if she sent him written permission.
In 2013, the town of Brunete, Spain instituted a new program to make dog owners pick up after their pooches. They recruited volunteers to watch for anyone leaving poop on the streets, and then mailed it back to the dog's owners.
Eric Idle rang George Harrison when they couldn’t find the money to get ‘The Life Of Brian’ made. George said “Well, when The Beatles were breaking up, Python kept me sane really, so I owe you one.” As a thank you, George was given a cameo as Mr Papadopoulos.
A new drug similar to Viagra can now be sold in pharmacies in the UK without prescription. Cialis, an erectile dysfunction drug will now be sold over the counter in UK pharmacies like Boots, after it was deemed to be safe to take without consulting a doctor or getting a prescription. The pills can last up to 36 hours!!
England is seeing record high levels of gonorrhoea and syphilis sexually transmitted infections, new figures reveal. People are being urged to practice safe sex to protect themselves and get tested if they may be at risk. There were 82,592 cases of gonorrhoea in 2022 - up 50% on the 54,661 recorded the year before, the UK Health Security Agency says. Syphilis cases increased by 15% from 7,543 to 8,692.
Okay, that’s enough information for one day. Have a tremendous and tumultuous Tuesday! I love you all.
#mixcloud#mi soul#dj#music#new blog#lockdown#coronavirus#books#democracy#brexit#cronyism#election#radio#tuesdaymotivation
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A Champ and a Superstar [Emily Sonnett x Reader]
requested by anon: could you do a emily sonnett where the reader is her gf and doesn’t play soccer but supports emily and meets the team for the first time :)
You make your way to the private box, guided by a couple of security guards. Taking your seat, you unbutton your black blazer, straighten out your jeans, and take off your sunglasses. You had just arrived at the SheBelieves Cup to watch the US take on Japan, but more importantly, you were there to watch your secret girlfriend, Emily Sonnett.
—————
For the past six months, you had been on tour all across the country for your first album, only seeing your girlfriend through the screen of your phone. But you had decided that in between shows, you’d stop by to watch and support her. Although you were still a small up and coming artist, your debut album had become increasingly popular in not only the states but around the world; there was even talk of a few Grammy nominees in your near future. Therefore, due to your newfound fame, the overwhelming amount of attention you’d received from the paparazzi, and the fact that you were an extremely private person, you and Emily both decided to keep your relationship under wraps for the time being, only telling your family and your manager.
—————
It was about twenty minutes before kickoff, when you receive a text from your publicist, letting you know that US Soccer and Fox Sports had found out about your presence and they wanted a quick interview. You sigh and lock your phone, knowing you won’t be able to get out of this one, as you knew your appearance would be a big deal not only because of your ‘celebrity status’ but also because you had been a huge public fan and advocate for the team.
A few moments later, a woman with a microphone and a cameramen enter your box, upon approval of your bodyguard. She explains to you the basic outline of her questions, and then signals for the camera to begin.
“Thanks, Julie. Today, we’re joined by singer and song-writer, (Y/N) (Y/L/N). How are you?”
“I’m doing good. Pretty excited to watch this match and support the team.” You respond with enthusiasm.
“Yes! I’ve seen your tweets. You’re a pretty big fan of the national team. How did that start?”
You continue to answer her questions, varying from your new album to your thoughts on the team. Meanwhile, down on the field, many of the USWNT players had noticed your interview playing on the big screen. Being big fans of you and your music, they were all surprised and freaking out that you were here watching one of their matches.
“Oh my gosh! Is that (Y/N) (Y/L/N)?” Kelley points.
“Holy crap, it is.” Ashlyn gasps, and Ali rolls her eyes at her wife’s childish behavior, even though she was a huge fan of you herself.
“Her music makes me proud to be gay.” Pinoe smirks triumphantly, proud of the fact that she had been the one to introduce your album to the team.
By now, there were murmurs amongst the team of their favorite new artist sitting in the stands.
Rose pokes Emily on the shoulder, interrupting her juggling session.
“Hey, did you see (Y/N) (Y/L/N) is here?”
Emily immediately lets the ball drop to the ground and turns to her friend, eyes wide open.
“What!?” She exclaims. “She’s here? Like in the stadium?” Why hadn’t you told her you were coming?
“Yes, dummy. Right up there.” Rose points at the big screen, where you were just ending your interview. You give the camera one last smile, before the screen returns to the regular scoreboard.
Emily scans the stadium, searching for you. As soon as she sees you in your box, she finds you’re already looking at her. The defender gives you a small smile before tilting her head sideways, silently asking you what you were doing here. You only smirk and wink at her, before she has to return to the huddle, as the game is about to start.
—————
You sit back and relax, enjoying the play of both teams, occasionally checking your phone and responding to some emails. You clap and cheer at each of the three goals from the US, finding yourself getting emotional over Christen’s goal. As the game is coming to an end, and the US has clearly won, 3-1, you see Emily waving at you, calling you to come down to the field. You beam with excitement, turning to ask your bodyguard to escort you.
On your way down, you are stopped to sign some autographs and take some pictures, as you were easily recognizable, especially after your interview. But once the final whistle blew and the celebrations began, the crowd’s attention turns elsewhere, focussing on the stage where the award ceremony was starting.
Once the trophy was lifted, the players disperse across the field, some still celebrating with confetti, some taking pictures and interacting with fans, and others greeting friends and family. Emily Sonnett was one of the latter, as she made a beeline for you. You lean down over the railing, as your girlfriend approaches.
“Hey there, champ.”
“Hey there, superstar.” Emily smirks, knowing your disdain for the title. She watches as you roll you eyes, but before you could respond, Emily decides to make a bold move. She reaches up to cup your face, bringing you in for a chaste but sweet kiss. You bring your own hands up to the blondes face, caressing her cheeks, as the two of you pull away. Leaning your forehead against hers, you let out a small giggle.
“Did we just do that?”
Emily hums. “We just came out.”
Your smile widens, finally feeling truly happy.
—————
While you and Emily were stuck in your own little world, the rest of the USWNT watched on as the defender started talking to you, their jaws dropping, as the two of you kissed.
“Worms! How does your son know (Y/N) (Y/L/N)?!” Alex turned to Kelley, who was just as baffled as everyone else.
“I—I have no clue.” The freckled woman stutters.
“Wow. Sonny has more game than we thought.” Pinoe exclaims, Ashlyn nodding along in agreement, as the team continues to watch you and Emily.
—————
Your joyful bliss comes to a halt, as you peek over your girlfriend’s shoulder and see all of the players with their eyes on you.
“Ummm… we have a little bit of an audience.” Motioning towards the group of women, disregarding the hundreds of fans in the stadium and the thousands watching on TV.
Emily turns around to face her teammates, cringing at the looks they’re giving her. She looks back at you, nodding her head towards the team.
“You wanna meet them?”
Your eyes almost pop out of their sockets, and a knot forms in your throat. “Um, what?”
“C’mon, they just saw us kiss. They’re gonna wanna meet you.” Emily explains, as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world.
You nod in agreement, too nervous to actually speak. You had been a huge fan of this team and many of the players, like Alex Morgan, Christen Press, Megan Rapinoe, and Tobin Heath, since you were a young girl. These women were not only your idols but also some of the most important people in your girlfriend’s life, so it was no surprise that it felt as you were about to throw up your nerves.
Emily guides you down on to the field, your security not far behind, as you make your way towards the locker room. Walking down the hallway, you can hear the familiar tune of your most popular song, “Never Giving Up,” blaring from the room you are about to enter. You feel your face flush in embarrassment upon hearing your own lyrics. Your girlfriend rolls her eyes at her teammates purposeful choice of song, as she runs her hand up and down your back, trying to soothe your nerves.
“Don’t work yourself up, babe. They’re gonna love you. In fact, I’m pretty sure they’re already pretty big fans of yours.” Emily kisses your blushing cheek.
As you enter the USWNT locker room, all conversation quiets, all dancing stops, and the music pauses, as all eyes were now on you. After a moment of silence, with no one really knowing where to begin, you hear Kelley whisper into Alex’s ear.
“Holy crap. That’s (Y/N) (Y/L/N). We’re in the presence of (Y/N) (Y/L/N).” Alex gives her best friend a slap on the shoulder, effectively silencing her.
“So you’re all probably wondering how I know (Y/N).” Emily starts, addressing her teammates and even the coaching staff, who are now listening. “Ummm, so here’s the thing… it’s just…I didn’t mean to keep this from you guys… but we agreed to keep it private…so don’t be too upset—”
“We’re dating!” You burst, unable to listen to your girlfriend stumble over her words any longer. At the confirmation of their suspicions, the team is left stunned into silence once again.
Lindsey breaks the stupor first. “Wait, let me get this straight. You, Emily Sonnett, the woman who face planted after tripping over nothing the other day, are dating (Y/N) (Y/L/N), the most popular singer at the moment who is undoubtedly up for a Grammy this year?”
Emily, who had been mentally following her friend’s words and connecting the dots, nods in affirmation. “Yup.” She exclaims, beaming pridefully, as she wraps her arm around your waist, kissing your temple.
“How?” Kelley blurts out, receiving another slap from Alex.
“Hey!” Emily protests, while you let out a snicker, poking your girlfriend’s side.
“Wait!” Ashlyn interrupts, and she narrows her eyes at you. “Even though we are big fans of you, and always have your album playing in the locker room, and we appreciate your support, and you’re part of the gayng…wait… I’m getting off track.” She shakes her head. “What are your intentions with our dear Sonny?” The other women, also curious, turn to you, awaiting your answer.
“Uhhhh… well I… ummm.” You struggle to form a sentence, as the gaze of the twenty-two women, many of whom you look up to, crumbles your confidence. It isn’t until you feel your girlfriend squeeze your waist and give you an encouraging smile that you find the appropriate words.
“I love her.” You state honestly, ignoring the look on Emily’s face, as this is the first time you’re saying those words. “Even though we’ve only been dating for a couple of months, I think I’ve known ever since our first date, despite Em almost ruining it by spilling wine on my dress.” You chuckle fondly at the memory before continuing. “She makes me laugh even when I don’t want to, and she comforts me when I’m sad. I’ve honestly never been happier than when I’m with her.” You reveal, and you take a deep breath. “So I guess my intentions are to love her, and exude the same light in her life as she shines in mine.”
Next to you, you see your girlfriend with misty eyes. She buries her face in your neck, peppering you with many kisses beneath your ear.
“I love you too.” She whispers for only you to hear, as she pulls away to gauge her teammates reaction, hoping for their approval.
“Well no wonder she’s a singer and song writer. That was freaking beautiful.” Ashlyn calls out.
“Yeah. No kidding.” Kelley huffs out, wiping her eyes of what you can’t tell to be real or fake tears.
Megan approaches the front of the room, now standing in front of you. “Thank god you’re a good one, kid. We liked you before, but now we absolutely love you. Some more than others.” She smirks at your girlfriend, before she boasts pridefully, “Y’know I was the one who introduced the team to your album.”
You tuck your head, almost not believing that Megan Rapinoe actually enjoys your music. “Thanks.”
“Well, now that your dating Sonny here, you’re officially part of the fam.” She looks back at her teammates for confirmation. “Right guys?!”
You hear a collection of ‘yes!’, ‘duh!’, ‘hell yeah!’, and ‘of course!’ come from the group of women.
You can’t help but beam at the thought of being accepted by the team.
“Thank you.” You whisper, snuggling further into Emily’s chest.
Looking down at you, she sweeps the hair out of your face. “For what?”
“Loving me.”
She softly grins, placing a kiss on the top of your head. “There’s nothing else I’d rather do.”
#uswnt x reader#uswnt imagine#uswnt imagines#emily sonnett x reader#emily sonnett imagine#emily sonnett imagines#uswnt#emily sonnett
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Eyes for you
request: R is in shock after meeting Tobin at the airport/a hotel and Tobin thinks she’s beautiful and decides to ask her on a date
pairing: Tobin Heath x Reader
words: 1374
Your eyes scanned the big entrance door of the hotel the USWNT would be staying at for their time being in this city.
You never really liked standing in front of hotels and waiting for your idols, you'd rather do that at the stadium, but friends of yours had dragged you along, not giving you much of a choice.
Half of the team already passed the small crowd that had formed, all patiently waiting to see their favored player, asking for pictures or autographs. You wanted neither. All you wanted was a quick conversation or a hug, wish them luck for the game or make them smile.
You chewed the inside of your cheek, nervously standing on your toes, looking out for Tobin as soon as the door opened another time while people started calling for their attention.
This would be your first time seeing any of these ladies in person and seeing them play on the field. Your parents were kind enough to let you skip school and go out to see them, even buying you that damned ticket you've desired all year now.
Megan and Ashlyn strolled past you, with Ali behind them, granting you a kind smile and wave of her hand before they stepped into their bus.
You turned your head back towards the entrance, your heart skipping a beat at the sight of your favorite brunette.
Tobin took her time with the fans, as if she was in an extraordinary mood today. Christen wasn't far behind her either.
Walking over towards where you were standing your breathing faltered, you grew unbelievably nervous all of a sudden, not really knowing why. She's just like any other person, except a hundred times more stunning than others.
Your gay panic started to kick in as well. You were sure that drool must've been leaking out of your mouth by now.
Tobin greeted the fans next to you, making small talk or taking pictures. Security always reminding her to hurry up and get onto the bus. She didn't pay them any attention as it seemed and took her sweet time.
Yes, Tobin! Do you.
How could anyone look this gorgeous in an oversized sweater and grey sweatpants? Tobin wouldn't even need to try and could be wearing nothing but a trash bag and you'd still fall to your knees in a second.
"Hey there." Your eyes widened as her voice startled you out of your deep thoughts. "I see you're wearing my number, huh. Taste." You took that one second to look down on yourself.
"Tobin, hi. Uh– it's so nice to meet you. I actually just wanted to wish you luck for later. I'll be there as well to watch you." Her intense stare made you feel uneasy but excited at the same time.
"You're coming to the game? I'd be happy to see you afterwards to sign your jersey." She winked and headed straight towards the bus.
She left you there shaken, with a wide mouth and chaos in your head.
"What the hell was that, Y/N?" One of your friends slapped your shoulder and laughed. "Tobin, hi? Oh my goodness. You're a useless gay, my dude." You blushed but tried to defend yourself.
Unbeknownst to you Tobin has been keeping her eyes on you, even from inside the bus once she sat down next to Christen. She wasn't prepared to meet someone that could catch her attention like that and yet you did. You seemed to be the only thing on her mind, besides soccer, as the bus made its way to the stadium.
She could only hope to find you somewhere along the sidelines once the game was over or she'd regret it for quite literally the rest of her life. Why not just ask for your name when she had the chance? She was just as useless as you.
"What's wrong?" Tobin's eyes found Christen staring at her with worry.
She sighed. "You saw the girl I was last talking to before I went on the bus? The cute one."
Christen nodded. "Yeah, she seemed very fond of you. What about her?" She couldn't help but giggle at the state her friend was in, obviously developing a big crush on a complete stranger and a fan at that.
"I don't really know. Uh– might as well ask her on a date then. I need to see her again."
You and your friends were seated in the second row closest to the field. It was the best view one could have to see them as close as possible. But your eyes seemed glued to one person only.
Tobin.
You knew it was impossible for her to spot you, she was way too focused on the game or warming up but you still daydreamed about it. All these gay scenarios in your head would get you unnecessarily attached to something that would never happen and just break your heart at the end of the day.
Instead you tried to relax and enjoy a marvelous game performed by these ladies.
You jumped out of your seat once the whistle was blown, signalizing the end of the match and hurried towards the barricade, a pen grasped tightly in your hand.
You kept your eyes on Tobin the whole time, hoping she would somehow recognize you and walk over here to keep her promise.
The whole stadium seemed to beg for her attention tonight. No wonder after scoring a goal and getting two assists. She performed whole magic once again.
'Fuck it' You thought and waved desperately. "Tobin!" You yelled, but no chance.
Becky and Sonny had her wrapped in the middle of them, like a big sandwich and walked along the field, obviously laughing about some dumb joke from either of them.
As if stung by a bee she quickly untangled from her friends and excused herself. "Sorry, guys. I need to search for someone." Turning around, with sweat running down her face, she started walking towards the barricades, obviously looking for someone that could resemble you.
She passed countless amounts of fans all yelling for her attention, but she gave them none of that. She was too busy moving and studying every face she walked past.
"Y/N. I think she's coming. Look." A friend of yours tapped your shoulder in excitement, pointing towards Tobin walking closer and closer. Your nerves shot through the roof, your heart rate picking up immediately. It was now or never.
"There you are." Her voice sent chills through your whole body. Your friend was mentally slapping herself as you momentarily froze.
"You kept your promise. I even got a pen." Tobin chuckled as you smiled big time, holding up said pen like some proud four year old.
"Thank you. Uh, where do you want me to sign? By the way, what's your name?"
"I think the back is fine. It's Y/N." She grabbed your pen and showed you her biggest smile before you turned around, feeling the pen moving against the thin fabric.
"So, I seem to have lost my phone number. Can I have yours?" The barricade made a weird sound as Tobin leaned against it, intently watching your face.
"Uh– what?" You choked on your saliva as she secured the pen behind her ear, grinning.
"I mean it. I'd love to have your number. Maybe take you out sometime, if you'd like to. You're a cutie."
"You're for real? I mean, sure. I'd love that, Tobin." You smiled at her.
"Where are you from? Might need to know that as well."
"I'm from around Portland actually, should make this a lot easier maybe. I know, crazy coincidence."
Tobin seemed to light up even more once she heard you mentioning Portland. "What's your number? Write it on my arm." Reaching for the pen she opened it for you and held her arm in front of you.
You hesitated while your brain panicked. With shaky hands you grabbed her forearm and wrote your number down. "Then it's settled. I will text you once I'm back at the hotel."
You blushed and bit your lip, the feeling of her skin still lingering on your fingertips. A date with Tobin Heath? Nothing better than that.
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Review-Love Death + Robots (Pt 1. Episodes 1-4)
So here we are again. You, dear readers, and I, a mostly defunct tumblr page. I was thinking...I’ve written a few reviews on here before, and I’ve rather enjoyed myself to be honest. So until RP starts up again for me, I’m going to grab some popcorn and start reviewing some of the media I’ve been indulging in during this exceptionally fun pandemic we’ve all been saddled with (and are becoming increasingly more and more used to as time goes on). Here we go!
Spoilers incoming! I don’t like to discuss a show without going through it entirely-no stone unturned. You have been warned!
Love Death + Robots is a compilation series-each episode is self-contained content, based on what I have experienced thus far. The content varies wildly from cute and sweet to surreal, to horrific. For right now I’m going to stick with the first four episodes since they are fresh in my mind.
Episode 1: Three Robots
Three robots shows a short adventure shared by, you guessed it-Three robots exploring the crumbling remains of human society. It comes across as three tourists making their way through an area that they are completely unfamiliar with, attempting to define and understand elements of the environment as humans once did. Their analysis and attempts to understand not only human culture, but also basic human biology, were entertaining to say the least. Each robot has flair, character, and a their own take on humans and humanity. Over the course of the episode, the fall of mankind is referenced a few times, being initially explained as a mass extinction due to environmental disasters (global warming is probably a factor-one of the buildings has an entire ship sticking out of it). However, the twist ending throws that whole theory into question once the cat that has been accompanying the robots for the last leg of their journey reveals itself as capable of speech. And, interestingly enough...being in possession of opposable thumbs. It was certainly unexpected, and a bit odd-the cat (and its many, many brethren) manage to finish out the episode by convincing the robots that if the robots do not pet them, the cats may explode. I will say that the ending, though it was rather silly and fitting with the tone, felt like an out of place twist intended mostly to give a bit of closure to a story that had no real need to have an ending. It felt a little out-of-left field, at least to me.
This first episode, I think, is one that I could recommend to a much more general audience than almost all of the other content of the show. It’s whimsical and cute, despite inhabiting such a grim setting (and grim it is-post apocalyptic is not taken lightly here. There are plenty of corpses, some skeletal and some not quite so much. At least one of them appears to have died by suicide). I found it to be a nice addition and a good introduction to ease people into the tone of the show. Definitely give this one a watch, even if the ending sort of comes from nowhere.
Episode 2: Beyond the Aquila Rift
This episode was definitely a change of pace from the first. It begins as a high science fiction story starring a hunky, middle aged man and his two crewmates, making some sort of cargo run (?) through a wormhole of some kind, but promptly finding themselves in a completely different place from what they expected. Hunky space captain wakes up first, finding that he is greeted by an old friend (read: lover) of his, who explains that there was a navigation error that led them off course-way off course. They’re in a completely different area than they expected. The ship’s navigator wakes as well, swearing that there couldn’t have been an error in her calculations, but seems ill and is placed back in her future tech cryopod to rest. Space captain man then bangs it out with his ex-lover (Greta) in a scene that was almost definitely written by a man, and she reveals to him that she lied, and that him and his crew are actually hundreds of light-years further off course than they had thought they were, basically dashing any hopes that he could have of returning to his old life. The two then wake the navigator again, who immediately starts ranting that ‘Greta’ isn’t who she says she is. At this point, enough clues have been given that the captain catches up with the audience (it was all a simulation the whole time), and he confronts Greta, demanding that she reveal herself as she truly is. She does, after some prodding-and the captain finds himself in an infested husk of a ship, aged and haggard, obviously dying of starvation. Greta reveals herself as a lovely spider-beast, and the captain wakes up from his pod again-back in his comfortable illusion once more.
I love the premise of this one. Crazy aliens and shit like this is a huge draw for me-sci-fi horror is probably my favorite subgenre of horror when it’s done well. I would count this episode as doing it pretty well. They don’t go into much techno-babble, which I think is a pitfall for some sci-fi stories. The writers are well aware that we aren’t spending too long in this world, so we don’t need to know much about the rules under which it operates outside of ‘computer mistake your ship fly here.’ The twist ending didn’t end up being too much of a twist-in my opinion there were too many clues given throughout the episode to make it that much of a surprise that things weren’t as they seemed. The odds of this man meeting his ex-lover in the infinitesimal reaches of space just by chance were a bit too impossible to make it believable-and the navigator was far too convinced that her work couldn’t be incorrect. In the end, it was an expected twist, but still pretty jarring. Execution is pretty good overall though-and the sex scene is pretty decent as well, even if its strictly a dude-fantasy thing. Also, call me a sucker for cool looking beasties, but I adore the design on spider-Greta. That’s a lady right there for you.
Episode 3: Ice Age
The only live action episode I’ve seen so far-this one gives an *entirely* different tone than the majority of the other episodes in the series. Topher Grace and Mary Elizabeth Winstead happen upon a lost civilization that exists entirely within their refrigerator. They watch in awe as it develops incredibly quickly-hundreds of years passing within the civilization in roughly an hour or so of real time. What starts in the morning as a town in the viking ages eventually develops into a modern society, almost destroys itself with nukes, and then rebuilds from the ashes into a fully futuristic society that quickly ascends beyond physical form, appearing to disperse itself into the cosmos, no longer bound by such petty rules as the laws of physics. A disappointed Topher asks if they’ll return-to which he receives a sad ‘no’ from his partner. It seems all is lost, and the couple go to bed for the night-only to find that the cycle has restarted overnight, and they probably won’t be able to keep any frozen chicken in the freezer for quite some time.
This one is probably one of my favorites of the series so far. It’s fairly well acted, but the real beauty of the episode is getting to watch the mini-civilization develop itself in a glorious time lapse-the work that must’ve gone into it must have been monumental, to be honest. The final product certainly felt that way, in any case. What I also found fascinating was a specific scene in which the protagonists were abandoned in place of some of the tiny denizens of the lost civilization-which made me realize exactly how slow the ‘normal sized people’s’ actions must have looked to the diminutive people of this rapidly developing society. Reminiscent of the earth’s motion in relation to our own perception-and reinforcing the concept that to an individual, perception is everything.
Episode 4: Sonnie’s Edge
This episode opens with three people transporting mysterious cargo into a heavily guarded complex, quickly encountering and interacting with a ‘bigwig’ of sorts with a beautiful woman on his arm. Through context clues the audience is easily able to discover that the three (pictured above) are here for a fight-and that their cargo is their fighter, a living creature of obviously immense proportion. The bigwig asks the team to throw the fight, and they refuse, even after he offers a large amount of money. (It’s worth mentioning that during this scene, ‘Sonnie’, the leader and controller of the beast fighter, shares an EXTREMELY homosexual gaze with the bigwig’s beautiful lady friend. Don’t think I didn’t notice the setup, because I definitely noticed the payoff, even though it was rudely interrupted). Sonnie and her teammates enter the ring, setting up as it appears that she will be piloting her fighter in some way. Her opponent is also introduced, though he is hardly important in the story-imagine a cake of beef with a big sticker on him that says ‘mysogyny’ in bold print. What follows is one of the most brutal fight scenes I’ve seen in animation (this is just my personal opinion though). These creatures fucking tear each other to shreds, with Sonnie’s beast only just barely emerging as the victor, tearing the opposing fighter’s head clean from its body. The bigwig is obviously angry, as is Sonnie’s opponent, and Sonnie and her team retires to a hotel room of sorts, with the exception of Sonnie-who slips away into the room that houses her fighter, promptly encountering the beauty from earlier! (Payoff time)..and it gets gay. Fast. I love me some wlw content, and there’s some nice tension here, right up until the beauty stabs Sonnie through the head. Rude. The bigwig reveals himself, which was a bit of a surprise-the part of me that hadn’t seen much of this show yet was hoping for a fluffy little happy ending. It wasn’t to be though..after the beauty crushes Sonnie’s skull, the two promptly realize that ‘Sonnie’ wasn’t Sonnie at all-just some biotech. The *real* Sonnie...was the fighter, the whole time. Who promptly makes short work of both the beauty and the bigwig, (implied), in what I can only describe as the most satisfying moment in the series that I’ve seen thus far.
This was easily my favorite episode of the show, and has continued to be, and I assume will continue to be my favorite through the rest of the series. It’s not just because of the lesbian rep (my people!), or the misogynists getting fucking destroyed, but the strength of the reveal, the choreography of the fight scene, and the *power* of the protagonist. I love her. I love her sooo much. We are seamlessly introduced into the world, shown a woman who has been beaten, scarred, faced sexual abuse, and she remade herself into a being of pure power. She fought back, and *look how she fights back*. I cannot describe just how much of a cheer-worthy moment it was to watch the smug smile be summarily wiped from the face of the bigwig. I *love* seeing a villain who has full confidence in their victory suddenly realize that they don’t have the upper hand anymore...and that they are, in fact, absolutely screwed. This was one of those wonderful, wonderful moments, and I can think of nobody more deserving than this villain of being torn to shreds. This was an A+ episode for sure-100% recommend this one for anyone who can handle a bit of gore.
Thank you so much for reading! This is only part 1...more to come!
#ooc#not ffxiv#review#show review#tv show review#love death and robots#love#death#robots#animation#sonnie's edge#ice age#beyond the aquila rift#three robots#wlw#lesbian
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“Snow White and the Seven Dwarves,” Reaction
(The one that started them all.....unless you're going in twisted wonderland order. Hope y’all enjoy the 5th edition of our tw classic disney movie marathon!)
- Where can I get a magic storybook like that?
- Ah yes, our queen!
Oh, and Epel’s there too.
- Queen: “Reveal her name!”
Mirror: “Lips as red as the rose. Hair black as ebony. Skin white as snow.”
Queen: I wanted a name, not all the ways she’s better than me!
- Isn’t Snow, like, 14? Girl’s a baby!
- I remember seeing Snow White’s wishing well at Disneyland when I was itty bitty. Damn echo kept interrupting my solo!
- Excuse you sonny! Did I say you could jump over that fence and scare my daughter? No. Now scram!
- Indirect kisses don’t count, you’re just pecking a bird.
- Yana really gave Rook an upgrade, huh? Did she keep anything from his original design?
- Vil loves peacocks, pass it on. (Seriously, they’re everywhere in this movie!)
- I wonder how well the huntsman knew Snow. Has he been around since she was teeny tiny? Did they regularly go out into the glen to collect flowers? Am I being way too curious about a character with only one real purpose in this film that only takes around 5-7 minutes of screen time? Yeah. I’m biased, what more do you want from me?!
- Baby baby girl. So soft, so sweet. Picking those pretty flowers. Was probably going to make a chain for her stepmother, cause that’s the kind of thing our baby Snow would do.
- HIS EYES!!! Yana kept Rook’s eyes from the original!!! That explains the emphasis on them in her artwork! The world makes sense again.
- INTO THE WOODS!!!! INTO THE WOO- oh, no. Still the wrong movie.
- Don’t cry Snowy, animals can smell despair...
- This movie is the reason I sing to birds... and cats... and kids... I just like singing, ok!
- Snow: *knocks on the door* Oh no, I guess no one’s home. We’ll just have to go inside and wait until they get back!
- This is why animals aren’t allowed to clean!
- HEIGH HO, HEIGH HO, IT’S OFF TO WORK WE GO! NO TIME TO EAT, OR SLEEP, OR PLAY, HEIGH HO, HEIGH HO! *whistles cheerfully*
- *animals run and hide upon the dwarves approach* Wow, way to leave a girl behind!
- Doc: “The floor! It’s been swept!”
Me: Oh my, how terrible. However will you survive without the protective coat of dust to cushion your feet, I wonder? *can you hear the sarcasm?*
- What did Jiminy Cricket do to become a dwarves swear word, and how do I make it happen?
- I could make a really dark joke about seven bachelors watching a teenage girl sleep, but I actually kinda like watching people when they doze off in a public area. They’re just so relaxed, and peaceful...
- Geez Grumpy, she’s 14. Stop talking as if she’s Jessica Rabbit comin’ to take your soul!
- My baby girl, teaching full grown men how behave like human beings like a boss.
- Happy: *touches water in trough* “It’s wet!”
Me: You don’t say
- The dwarves are like, We’ll either all get clean or drown Grumpy tryin!
- Queen: Hey, mirror, who’s the fairest now?
Mirror: Still Snow, ma’m.
Queen: What? No, that’s impossible! But the hunter gave me her heart, it;s right here!
Mirror: He gave you a pig heart.
Queen: BITCH DID WHAT?!?!
- The queen didn’t get a chance to order the huntsman’ s execution. My husband lives! (Friendly reminder that this is a joke....just like the rest of my life...)
- Forget beauty and cosmetics, Vil’s book collection is gorgeous!
- So the evil queens hair was black...so was the huntsman’s.... Does Yana have a thing for blondes, or...?
-They really liked scenes with no real point or purpose, huh? I’ve got nothing to say for 15 straight minutes.
- Grumpy is the original tsundere, and y’all know it.
- Ohp, and there’s the hag with the apple. Ya’ll know how this goes down.
- Way to get yourself killed queeny.
- The dwarves can craft, sing, play instruments, and own a diamond mine; how are they still single?!?!
Snow: They’re all gay.
That makes way more sense, thank you!
- Boy saw a beautiful corpse and thought, “Better kiss it now before it bloats.”
- And they lived Happily Ever After!
The End!
Wait a minute. What happened to Epel?!
#twisted wonderland#pomefiore#disney binge#disney movie marathon#movie reaction#snow white and the seven dwarves#vil schoenheit#rook hunt#epel felmier
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Instead of Flying Off, He’ll Stay
Rafael Barba/Dominick “Sonny” Carisi Jr.
Sonny's life was not a Hallmark movie. He just had to get Barba to fall in love with him before Christmas Eve.
Thanks to @me-ladie for beta reading
For @richardgoranski for being an incredible friend and being there for me
[AO3]
Rafael Barba loved Christmas. It had always been a family holiday to him, not the commercialized monstrosity that it had become. He’d never really gotten the concept of Santa Claus, so he never sent a list or went to Macy’s. But every year on Christmas Eve, after his mother read him Twas the Night Before Christmas , he would stare out the window at the direction he believed to be North and make a wish.
It had been years since he had done that and it was a little less than a month away from Christmas and carols had been playing in all of the stores he passed on the walk home from his mother’s Thanksgiving dinner. He’d stopped believing in Santa when he was eleven and his knees cracked when he lowered himself to the floor, still he faced North and hoped for a Christmas miracle.
He couldn’t spend Christmas alone for another year. He didn’t want to go to bed eight thirty watching old claymation movies while his coworkers thought he was off on some extravagant get away. He wanted someone to whisper “Merry Christmas” to over mugs of hot chocolate and kiss under the mistletoe, he’d always wanted to do that.
Once he thought his symbolic wish out thoroughly, he stood and chuckled to himself. The whole exercise had been ridiculous, but part of him deep down still believed in magic. It allowed him to sleep a little easier and wake up a little lighter.
The day after Thanksgiving was always spent decorating for Christmas. Bella would pull out the boxes she had in storage (this year, in her attic since she and Tommy decided to bite the bullet and get a real house), and Sonny would always end up doing most of the actual decorating. It was his burden to bear, being the only one who could string lights with a swish of his wrist.
“Bella,” he glared at her as he pulled out the seventh new pack of lights from her shopping bag, “I can’t do this. Not alone without drawing any attention to myself.” He let them all fall into his lap, “Do you have to be seen from space? Afraid Dad won’t be able to find your new roof?”
She rolled her eyes and pulled up a pinterest board on her iPad, scrolling through pages upon pages of our door light design and “the perfect Christmas lawn.” They all looked like something out of that dumb live action Grinch movie.
“I wanna beat that bitch Cynthia. She thinks she’s so much better because her precious Annabell was born in wedlock,” She flipped her hair and added a snooty voice before breaking into a groan. “She doesn’t even realize her perfect Carl is cheating on her with Todd from the school board.”
“That’s the Christmas spirit.” He sighed, not actually caring. That bitch had insulted his niece and made his sister feel inadequate, they were going to crush her. “Alright but, I can’t do all of this my way without being seen. It’s not like I can kill your street lights and with this many lights someone is bound to see me. Even at 3 am.”
They had a small staring contest. Bella matching his gaze with everything she had.
He blinked first.
A blinding grin spread across her face. “So when are we gonna start Nicky?” She winked at the nickname, the one that made him sound like some younger version of their father. “I’ve got the decorations, you’ve got that Christmas magic. Let’s kick a soccer mom’s zumba tight ass.”
“I’ll do it, but only the second floor. Everything else outside is done by hand.” He dropped all of the lights back into the plastic bag. “And you have to listen to me bitch about Dad for as long as I want.”
She clapped excitedly. She was a gossip by nature and Sonny had just offered her exactly what she wanted. He didn’t mind as long as she wasn’t going to try and convince him to do her whole yard. “Great! You can finally tell me what the Big Man said last night. I haven't seen you that upset since Queens SVU.”
Sonny’s mood darkened, he hadn’t planned on bringing that up. He was just going to go on about how their father saw his work and even his law degree as a waist and a distraction. It should have been obvious that Bella would want to know why he ducked out of Thanksgiving before the dessert had even touched the table.
“While we do the interior. It’s Gabby’s first Christmas in the new house and I wanna make it special.” Bella opened the first bin and Sonny got to work.
Decorating was an art that Sonny considered himself particularly gifted at, it came with the territory of who he was. When stringing lights was as easy as tracing the square of Bella’s kitchen window, it was hard not to be an expert.
He could lose himself in the feeling of it. A flick of his wrist and a garland covered the arch between the dining room and living room. It sent his heart racing, as if there was electricity flowing through him and extending out to the decorations. They were just an extension of himself.
Bella kept warning him to take it easy not go so fast. She only knew how drained he used to get after half an hour of this, but after last night he could do the whole house without breaking a sweat. It made the rush he got feel cheapened somehow. He just hoped he’d be able to enjoy the place, gleaming like the city skyline, after he got everything off his chest.
“Looks great, Sonny.” She squeezed his arm and pressed a cup of freshly made hot chocolate into his hands. “Don’t worry about the rest right now. Come on and sit down.”
She gently guided him over to the couch and practically pushed him down onto it. “I don’t want you passing out before we get some proper storytelling going.”
“I don’t pass out-”
“Please,” She scoffed setting herself down next to him, “You always act like you just gave blood. ‘Oh,’” She moaned doing a terrible impression of him even though they had the same accent. “‘Just let me sit here and eat my cookie and drink my apple juice. I’m so weak.’”
It got a chuckle out of him, “Well, no more of that, I’m getting stronger-” He froze. Two days ago, it had just been a nice thing that he couldn’t explain. He winced at his own slip.
“Sonny, what’s wrong?” She grabbed his shoulder, suddenly concerned.
“It’s not your fault. It’s just…” He sighed, he really did want to talk about this. He was having a hard time dealing with it on his own and needed the support. It was just difficult to say. “Dad wants to retire after this year.”
Her eyes widened. It would’ve been comical under different circumstances. “Holy shit, you… he needs you to…” She took a deep swig of her hot chocolate, “Shit.”
He nodded and took his own sip, not having anything to really say to it.
“Alright, alright...alright, tell me exactly what he said.”
“He didn’t say much, just asked me to take over next Christmas.” He shrugged, “I tried to tell him I didn’t want to, but he gave me that whole ‘first son’ thing-- which is bullshit by the way, if Jenny McCarthy could do it--”
She raised a hand to stop it. “T, Gigi, and I all don’t want anything to do with it. So that wouldn’t matter. Dad would cave if we would.”
“I know.” Another sip of cocoa. “I wish you did because he tore my life apart. I have one friend, I’m not content with my job, I haven’t dated anyone in almost five years. I just stood there as he laid out why nobody would really miss me if I picked up and left.”
“I’d miss you.”
He smiled softly, “Thanks, Bells, but you could still visit. The only person who sorta counts is Amanda and Dad would rather I tell her than force him to work another year.”
She flopped backwards so she was staring up at the ceiling, “Mr. Tradition probably thinks you two are going to get together.”
Sonny was silent for a long time, running through all the ways to phrase his next sentence. He wouldn’t look her in the eyes when he finally decided on what to say. “That was actually my only way out of it. Dad says he’ll back off if I can have a stable relationship by Christmas. Then leaving wouldn’t just be my decision.”
“You can’t just get a girl pregnant.”
A laugh was startled out of him, “Nope, still gay and still single.”
Her “scheme smirk” was firmly in place when she sprung back up, “Well, you’re already in love with someone. So you just have until Christmas to get Mr. Barba to fall in love with you.”
“I’m not in love with Barba.” The redness of his cheeks didn’t help the lie. “Besides, we’re not that kind of close and I’m not convinced that he doesn’t hate me. You don’t go from that to love in a month.”
She swatted his arm. “He doesn’t hate you. It’s impossible to hate you. Plus, you can just use your Christmas powers to charm him.” She wiggled her fingers in his face, barely containing her laughter.
“You know, it doesn't work like that.” He insisted, retaliating as if they still were children and pinning her back on the couch. “You really think Barba’s my best bet?”
She shrugged as well as she could, “You’re gay and your only friend is a girl. I mean, unless you wanna download Grindr and try your luck.”
“Hey, Barba,” Sonny kept rubbing his hands on his pants or the bottom of his jacket. He was nervous sweating and on the off chance he had to actually touch the other man, he wanted them to be at least somewhat dry. “Are you free tomorrow night?”
The prosecutor stopped, but looked more confused than anything else, “Depends upon what you’re suggesting.”
“I have a new recipe I wanna test out.” He was lying. That was a flat out lie, but he wasn’t brave enough to just ask him out. “So dinner tomorrow night?”
“So, I your new Guinea Pig?” The corner of his mouth quirked up, “Alright, I could be ready by eight.”
Sonny didn’t react for a moment before a smile split his face. He hadn’t expected this to work. “Perfect! I’ll have time to make dessert as well.”
He nodded, “I’ll see you then, Carisi.” With that, he turned and left.
Sonny half stumbled back to his desk, causing Amanda to raise an eyebrow, “What happened?”
“I’ll tell you tonight.” He said, trying not to turn back and watch the door Barba just left through. Now he just had to figure out which recipe Barba would like the best.
“So you need me to watch Holly for just no reason?” Amanda loved watching Holly. Sure, she was huge and drooled all over the furniture, but she was sweet and was glad to just be a pillow or space heater, “Are you sure there isn’t a reason?”
He sighed, if his plan worked out he’d have to tell her at some point. “I have a date and I don’t want Holly getting over excited and scare him away.” She was the sweetest, but she got over enthusiastic when new people came over. “A lot went into this.”
She arched an eyebrow, “Really? Anyone I know? Because the only person I’ve seen you fawn over is-” Her mouth fell open in realization. “No….You finally asked Barba out? And you’re skipping straight to bringing him home?”
“Oh my god,” He groaned, the noise drawing his dog over to rest her head on his lap. “I’m making him dinner, and I’m not even sure he realized that I was asking him on a date. He might be straight.”
“He’s just as smitten as you are and just as bad at hiding it.” She said moving closer so they both had access to Holly.
They sat there for some time, ABC Family playing through a rotation of Christmas movies that seemed to be compose of Elf and Christmas Vacation, exclusively. Right before Clark Griswold officially lost it, Amanda passed out using Holly’s stomach as a pillow. Sonny had done it enough times to admit that it was one of the reasons he had gotten a Newfoundland. Of course, once Amanda was finally asleep at a reasonable time, Jesse started crying.
She raised her head slightly before dropping it back down, “She wants her Uncle Sonny.”
He laughed and went to go take care of his goddaughter. “Hey, Baby.” He cooed bending down to lift her.
His heart always melted when he held her, her little hands clutching at the collar of his shirt. He wanted to have that with his own kids at some point with a child of his own. Barba probably wouldn’t want kids, he didn’t seem like the type. But they’d cross that bridge if they ever actually made it there.
Jesse’s crying wouldn’t subside, so he pulled out a little trick he would do for Gabby when ever she got fussy.
He felt the familiar spark in his fingertips and the energy that flooded his chest making him feel whole and energized. He pulled a stuffed puppy out from behind his back.
They toy whined at Jesse and licked the tear tracks that stained her cheeks until the wailing turned into giggling and squeals of glee. The magic to create the little puppy might have given him a rush of joy, but he sound of Jesse’s laughter overwhelmed him with happiness.
“Sonny, how do you always-”
He dropped the toy when he heard Amanda’s voice. It immediately tried to get back up, scratching at his leg with blue cotton paws and yipping at him to demand attention. Without even thinking he snapped his fingers and it fell limp as if it were always just a normal plushie.
Her eyes were bugging out of her skull as she stared down at the offending object. Most people, well adults, didn’t react well when confronted with magic. They lacked the imagination to really comprehend what was happening and lashed out at him because of it. He just hoped Amanda would at least hear him out-
“I fucking knew it!” She cheered and his mind went blank. “You’re too good with kids, and you’re ridiculously lucky, and you know things about people that you couldn’t possibly know, and your cookies.”
He nodded, slowly coming back to himself, “Uh, yeah, my cookies are magic.” It came with the territory of being who he was. He put Jesse back into her crib, leaning down to pick up her new toy. Once she was tucked in, he snapped again and the puppy yawned, padding over and curling up against her side. It would help sooth her if she woke up again.
He turned back to Amanda, “Come on, I’ll explain everything.”
Amanda took it well, after she laughed at the fact that Sonny’s future hinged on whether or not he could get Barba to fall in love with him by Christmas, and admit it. He could worry about the actual admission later, his first goal was to get Barba to agree to a second date.
He wished his particular brand of magic applied to any kind of food. Sure his desserts were always perfect no matter what they were, so he had that going for him, but for an average everyday dinner, he had to rely on his own talent and experience. His own skill wasn’t something to be scoffed at though, so he thought it would be okay.
Barba had never had his cooking anyway, so if he was having an off day he could impress him even more next time. The dessert was all he really needed to get to phase two of Bella’s plan.
“So what are we having?” Barba had come straight from work but he immediately took off his jacket. It made him look softer, and comfortable in Sonny’s home. “I haven’t eaten in hours so it had better be good.”
He laughed leading him through to the kitchen, “It’s nothing special, just a new kind of pizza dough I’d been meaning to try and sugar cookies with a new flavor of icing.” It was nice finishing up dinner and being able to look over to the island to see Barba sitting there.
“I didn’t realize dessert was going to be cookies. I would’ve made this my cheat day.”
Sonny rolled his eyes, “Eating healthy keeps you fit, eating well keeps you sane.” He pulled out the wine, “Have some cookies and don’t worry about a diet, which you don’t need by the way.”
“Dinner and compliments? If I didn’t know any better, I’d think this was a date.”
His heart dropped to his feet. He knew this was a possibility, but that didn’t stop his disappointment from showing, or Barba’s surprise at seeing it. This had always been the hard part when he imagined this scenario in his head, having to explain what had been lost in translation.
“Oh, I thought this was just a friendly dinner.” Barba was flushed and started messing with his tie. He only did that when he was nervous. “I know you do things like this with Liv and Amanda. So I assumed…”
“No, it’s fine.” He forced a smile and continued setting the table. The cheerful Christmas plates didn’t do much for his mood though. “We’re friends, right? This could just be a fun friend dinner. That is,” he took a deep breath and a leap of faith, “if you want it to be.”
A slow smile spread across the prosecutors face as he reached for his glass, “No, I think this would be the perfect first date. I mean, as long as those cookies are as good as Liv says they are.”
“Oh, trust me, they’re better.”
“Sonny, this is great!” Bella cheered, the shrill voice loud enough that Holly was reacting to it from across the room. “I need you to tell me everything about that date. You made him cookies, right? Exploit your gifts.”
“He liked the cookies.” he rolled his eyes resisting the urge to laugh. “We’re actually going out again tonight, taking Holly for a W-A-L-K in that park around the corner. Seemed like a romantic thing to do.” Of course, that left him sifting through winter coats and scarfs trying to figure out what pair would look the best while keeping him warm.
She sighed dreamily, “That’s straight out of a movie. It’s gonna snow right?”
“Check the weather app.”
He knew that she was glaring at her wall. She always hated when he said things like that. “You know what I mean. A light flurry while walking through the park, it’s a Hallmark movie.”
“This whole thing is a Hallmark movie.” He ran a hand down his face and finally decided on a not too heavy black pea coat, shorter than the one that he wore for work most days, with a red wool scarf that Gina had knit him a few years ago. “That means it has a happy ending, right?”
“Of course! I was talking with Amanda earlier,” He didn’t exactly regret introducing the two of them, but it was worrying that his sister and his best friend gossiped about him. “She said you two are adorable together at work, and I know you fall fast. If he’s like you, this will be fine.”
He waited until only a minute before Barba-no, Rafael- to get there before grabbing Holly’s leash and the collar. “A week and a half is fast. Especially since this is only our second actual date. We’re always so busy that working lunches are all we’re able to do.”
“Alright, then make it count. I’m not losing you because of this.”
“It’ll be fine, Bells. Besides, it would take a lot more than moving to get rid of me.” He laughed to try and calm her down. It wasn’t time to give up hope. “No I’ve got to go, Rafael’s here.”
After a quick goodbye, he grabbed Holly and opened the door. “Hey.”
Rafael smiled at him for a moment, before his attention shifted to the beast at Sonny’s side. “Wow, when you said you had a big dog, I was expecting a golden retriever or border collie.” He still bent down allowing Holly to sniff and lick his hand before he buried it in her long fur.
“No, they’re more medium. Besides, Holly’s sweeter than any of them.” Sonny was beaming as well, glad that his girl wasn’t going to be a problem. “Just wait until you see her in the snow. It’s her favorite thing.”
“I bet.” He stood back up and held out his hand to Sonny, “Ready to go.”
They made it to the park in only a few minutes and Sonny could hear Rafael’s breath catch when he saw the start of the path. It was an idyllic scene with old fashioned street lamps and trees wrapped in Christmas lights. The only thing missing was the snow.
“This is beautiful.” He whispered, his hand tightening around Sonny’s. “How long is the path?”
“As long as you want it to be,” He said with a slight smirk, “but I do have a destination in mind.”
Rafael raised an eyebrow, but didn’t comment. In fact the conversation started up again with discussing how many strands of lights there had to be in the park and whether or not that was a good use of power and taxpayer money. Sonny was convinced that he was only playing devil’s advocate when he claimed that Christmas lights were not worth the money they cost.
The conversation never stalled or slowed, showing Sonny just how easy it was to be around Rafael. It was a feeling he’d never experienced before. So he led them in circles for almost half an hour before finally ending up at his favorite spot in the park.
The lights thinned as they drew nearer, but Rafael was too focused on him to notice. It was flattering, even though the actual spot was more than enough to pull his attention away from him.
One tree stood in the middle of a plaza with a single bench at the base of it. It was a nice space all year round, but during december it was gorgeous. It was done up like a proper christmas tree with tinsel and ornaments of gold spheres and tiny wooden toys. The arms of the bench were even wrapped in silver and gold garlands.
“Do you wanna sit?” He turned to Rafael, admiring how the light danced off of his eyes as he stared at the spectacle.
“Yeah, will Holly be fine with taking a break?” It took him a second to drag his eyes away which was both adorable and incredibly validating.
He looked down at his feet where Holly had already laid down, “I think she’ll be okay.”
The bench was cold, but it was offset by the heat radiating from where Rafael’s leg pressed against his. He wanted to wrap an arm around his shoulders, but he’d wait until he shivered or gave some other indication that he was cold.
“You really like Christmas, don’t you?” He chuckled, gesturing to the candy cane pin that Sonny had honestly forgotten about. It was probably still there from last year.
“My whole family really gets into it and have for my whole life. It’s just a part of the year.” He shrugged, “Just a heads up, If you don’t like Christmas, my family isn’t gonna like you.”
Their shoulders bumped gently, “Then we’re fine. I’ll admit that I’m not as festive as you are. Maybe I could get one of those Christmas Tree ties.” He chuckled at his own joke, barely hiding the lift in the corners of his mouth. It was incredibly endearing.
“That would be adorable.” Sonny admitted, finally giving in and pulling Rafael closer.
He looked increible under the lights of the tree. Multicolored flecks dotted his cheeks and made the green of his eyes practically glow. Looking into those eyes, happiness filled his heart and he knew exactly how to let it out.
It happened in the blink of an eye. All of the joy he felt well up in his chest and the moment he released it, the first snowflake fell, a light flurry that completed the whole scene and made an already incredible night perfect.
Rafael looked up at the sky, pure wonderment and awe gracing his features. He was beautiful and incredible and, God, Sonny loved him.
His eyes widened as he came to the realization. Sure, he wanted to fall in love with him, but to actually feel the emotion flooding through his whole body, to know for certain from the tips of his toes to the top of his head, it changed the way he saw everything. It sent a thought directly to the forefront of his mind. He couldn’t say “I love you” first. He couldn’t pressure Rafael into saying it back or leave it hanging over him if he didn’t feel the same way.
“What are you thinking?”
Sonny smiled brighter than he had in years, “You’re beautiful.” He whispered and kissed him, something he had wanted to do since they met.
The next day, Sonny dragged Amanda into an empty interrogation room the first chance that he got. He was freaking out. He’d already called Bella who suggested he invite Rafael to spend Christmas Eve at her place. That way, their father could see that Sonny loved the ADA, even if they hadn’t said it yet. However Sonny didn’t know what would happen if he brought Rafael into that mess of a party.
“But you said the date went well. Also, you made it snow?” she whistled. “That’s straight out of one of those movies you like so much.”
“I’m a walking cliche, sue me.” He rolled his eyes before getting back to business, “But that’s the sort of thing I’m talking about. Our family dinners are times when I don’t have to hide anything about myself and it’s nice. I can cook the way I want and when I make a strange comment or know something no one told me, no one questions it. I just don’t want to do something like I did with the toy and Rafael to freak out.
“It would just be so difficult to share things like that with him….It’s freaky and abnormal.” He collapsed into one of the chairs, “Sometimes I wonder if any of this is even worth it. It’s not gonna end well.”
She recoiled in shock but quickly recovered and laid a hand on his shoulder to try and comfort him. “Hey, you told me that you love him, right? You’re just too afraid to say it.”
“I wouldn’t put it that-”
“Yes or no, Dominick.”
He nodded, “Yeah, I love him.” That he was sure of, it was why he couldn’t lose him.
She held out her hands like that was enough of an answer. She then sighed as if he was an idiot. “If you don’t bring him and trust him with this, then you’re putting a wall between you guys and not even giving him the chance to love the real you. You’re self-sabotaging without even meaning to.”
He knew she was right, even though he didn’t want to admit it. “I’ll invite him,” was all he could say, but she knew that she’d won.
He caught up with Rafael after court later that day. It was a solid win, which went a long way to easing Sonny’s nerves over the whole thing. At least he was in a good mood. “Hey, Rafael, I was wondering if you wanted to spend Christmas Eve with my family and I. It’s my sisters and my parents, so nothing too big.” He smiled brightly, “But I’d love to have you there.”
The bright spirit collapsed, darkening his expression into almost a glare, but he why would he have been glaring. “I didn’t think you’d want me there.” His jaw was clenched tightly, “I figured it wasn’t worth it to continue this.”
Sonny fought a losing battle to not let his hurt show. He recognized those words. They were his own and Rafael was throwing them back in his face. “So, you heard?” There really was nothing left to say, if he really felt that way.
“Of course I heard, you left the door open.” He pulled his eyes away from him and stared at the ground, “And you’re right. It’s abnormal….We should just call it off now since it’s obviously not going to go anywhere.”
Sonny nodded even though his heart was breaking. There wasn’t much of a fight when what’s wrong is who you are. “For what it’s worth, you’re incredible.”
Rafael just turned and walked away, leaving Sonny standing alone in the hallway and effectively sealing his fate.
Amanda was a mom to a child who probably wouldn’t remember what she was doing most of the time. Jesse was only two, and that meant, she was going to take that shift on Christmas Eve and then go home to eggnog with her sister. It was almost a vindictive pleasure that she got from breaking the mommy-rules like that.
But all of that joy came crashing down when she crashed into Barba. Sonny been particularly closed liped to her for the past few days, but she hadn’t anticipated this being the reason behind the silence. “You should be at Bella’s,” was all she could say because if he wasn’t at Bella’s then Sonny wouldn’t be staying in New York.
“No, Sonny made his views on our relationship quite clear and we decided to end it.”
Her jaw dropped, “Really, what did he say?” She didn’t think a declaration of love would end with breaking up, and there hadn’t been enough time for him to regress back into self-doubt.
“Nothing you hadn’t already heard.”
Oh, shit. She hadn’t closed the door all the way.
“Barba,” she leveled a glare with him, “I don’t know how much you heard from us the other day, but what Sonny told me was that he was afraid you’d think he was too strange for you to stay with him and that he should just break it off before you could decide to leave him.” Her words hit him hard, it was written all over his face.
“If you love him or even care about him, you have to go to Bella’s now and fix this.” Or he’d never get the chance to.
He gave her a sharp nod and started towards the door. He only made it a few steps before breaking into a run.
“I sometimes forget what he’s really like.” Gina broke the silence that had fallen over the room and drawing everyone’s eyes away from the fireplace, “I have to say, he really has mastered the cheerful backhand. The movies never get that right.”
Teresa laughed, “I think Tim Allen did it the best, but his sarcasm was too blatant.”
“Tim Allen also didn’t destroy my life.” Sonny mumbled, standing up and leaving the room. Gabby was still having fun. She loved seeing her grandfather and Sonny wasn’t going to let his mood bring hers down.
He stood in the kitchen and poured himself a spiked eggnog. It didn’t take long for Bella to find him. “So, it didn’t work with Rafael? I’m sorry, Sonny. He made you happy.” She said that like it was the most important part of their relationship, not that if Rafael had been there he’d have been able to keep his job and life. She was right.
“He overheard the truth and didn’t take it well.” He said with a shrugged, “That was sort of a deal breaker.”
“Well, his loss.” She reached from behind her back and pulled out a Santa hat. With a sad smile she stood on her toes and placed it on his head. “You’re a fucking catch and you made it snow for him. He doesn’t deserve you.”
He wrapped her into a brotherly bear hug. “Can you tell him that? I just...I was getting ready to actually tell him. I didn’t want him out of the loop around you guys.”
She squeezed him tightly before letting go. “He doesn’t deserve to know everything. I know you loved him, but if he was worth your time, he would be here.”
Almost like clockwork, there was a loud banging on the front door.
“You don’t think.”
Sonny shook his head and wet to the front door, “I swear to god, my life is not a Hallmark movie.”
Of course, he was still surprised to see and out of breath Rafael standing on the other side. He held up a hand when Sonny opened his mouth and launched into a probably planned speech. “The other day was all a misunderstanding. I didn’t hear the important part of what you said, and even if I had, I should have given you a chance to explain.
“I don’t care what your secret is, I promise you I can take it. I just thought that you thought we were too difficult and strange, but you are,” He took a deep breath, “You are incredible and so wonderful and you don’t have to let me inside, but I just couldn’t go another minute without telling you that I love you.”
“I can stay.” He said. Sonny’s mind went blank the moment he hear those words. Rafael was in front of him saying that he loved him and Sonny loved him back. Without even thinking about it, he pulled him in for a kiss, pausing briefly after a moment to stare at the gorgeous man in front of him
“Wait a second,” Rafael pushed him back a bit, just enough that Sonny couldn’t lean in for another kiss. “You were going to leave?”
He took a deep breath and Rafael’s hands, “My father’s Santa Claus and if I hadn’t found someone that I loved to tie me here, I was going to have to take over for him.”
His eyes widened to the size of dinner plates, “You love me?”
“Yeah, I love you.”
“Your father is Santa Claus?”
“Yes, he is.”
He nodded “That conversation with Rollins makes a lot more sense now.” His gaze was soft when he came back from the shock, “It still doesn’t matter. Just that does explain how everything was always perfect.”
Sonny raised an eyebrow. He hadn’t told him about the magic yet, “How?”
“I asked your dad for someone to spend Christmas with me.” He pulled Sonny against his chest, “I guess he got my wish.”
“Well then, Merry Christmas, Rafael.”
“Merry Christmas, Sonny.”
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Hello are you still taking requests? 5,7 and 93, please. Ignore this if you aren't :) thank you.
So this starts out one way, and then ittook a turn and I just… let it. Because life does that. Andbecause I need to stop erasing and rewriting everything I put down. So yeah. It’s not in any ‘verse, though it could be a newone—Shit-We-Won’t-Tell-The-Grandkids 'verse, maybe.
“What do you mean you’releaving?”/ “Please, I’m begging you.”/ “I oweyou what?”
“Sorry, I’ll only be a second, Ijust need to grab a—is that my razor?” Molly stopped shortbefore she got to the medicine cabinet.
“Well I was hardly going to ruinmine just for my legs. The blades cost £4each. You’re dripping, by the way.”
“Bollocks,” she said, puttingher hand over the sink while she opened the medicine cabinet. Shereally should keep plasters downstairs in the kitchen, since that waswhere most of the injuries in her flat occurred (very few of themactually hers), but it just felt weird and wrong to do that.
She heard the sounds of Sherlockgetting out of the bath behind her and clamped down on the urge tolook; she’d seen him naked a million times before (she was a doctor,not a woman, and modesty was for other people anyway) butnever with shaved legs and she was a bit curious if he’d gone anyhigher. She was really a terrible person.
“Why are you bleeding so much? Did you hit an artery?” he asked, peering down at her hand.
“No, but I did take off part of mythumbnail with the cheese grater. Don’t worry, I picked it out ofthe cheese, so no one’s getting any surprises on their pizza.”
“Shame, it’d be a bit like findingla fève in a King cake.”
“King cake.” It rang a bell,but wasn’t something she could ever recall having.
“Mm. French thing, for Lent. They put a figurine inside a cake and whoever’s lucky enough to findit gets to be king for the day. Hardly worth the dental work, butthat’s the French for you.”
“Ah. So was that for some case inFrance?” she asked, watching the blood swirl down the drain asshe washed the wound. She always thought it looked pretty. Andthat’s why they don’t let you out of the morgue, she thought toherself.
“No, family. Fully one quarterFrench on my Mum’s side. And Catholic, to boot.”
She turned to him with an expression ofmock-appal. "A Papist? The horror.“
He smiled softly as he looked down atthe plaster he’d grabbed, peeling the paper tabs off the sticky part. "I was even baptized Catholic, as far as that goes. And I cansay the Rosary in seven different languages. Came in surprisinglyhandy when I was in Eastern Europe.” He used gauze to dab awaythe blood that continued to well up from the wound, then gentlyapplied the plaster.
Her breath caught at the weird, casualintimacy of the moment; she wasn’t used to being the one patched upand if she did need it, she always just did it herself. She soughtdesperately to cover the things it was pulling out of her; she wasafraid she might do something stupid like kiss him. "So whywere you shaving your legs?“ she blurted.
"Why do you shave yours? I likethe smoothness,” he said with a straight face, then cracked intoa smile. "It’s for a client.“
"What are you, Pretty Woman?”
“That remains to be seen, but onehopes. When’s the last time you’ve been to a drag show?”
“Why would you assume I’ve everbeen to a drag show?”
“Jim Moriarty, with whom youwatched Glee, was your boyfriend and you’ve gone tothree gay weddings in the time I’ve known you. Your femininity andsexuality are completely non-threatening and, work attire aside,you’ve got a strong sense of personal style. Of course you’ve beento drag shows. Also, I’m going to need help doing my make-up.”
The desire to kiss him evaporated andwas replaced with the desire to throttle him instead. She settledfor a scowl.
*
“Well, I mean, Cher is kindof a cliche,” Molly said, following him to the bar.
“I don’t even know who Cher is,”he complained, gesturing to the bartender to get his attention.
“Of course you don’t. Have younever been to a fancy dress party? There’s always that one couplethat goes as Sonny and Cher because it’s 'retro.’ Though, I mean,more in the 90s than now, but old people still do it.”
“Wouldn’t know, I delete alltraumatic experiences.”
She rolled her eyes and ordered herselfa double bourbon on the rocks and got Sherlock something neon pinkwith a crazy straw. He might delete it later, but she was going toenjoy that memory for a long time.
“Molly?! Molly Hooper?!” Oneof Beyoncé’s back-up dancers appeared at her elbow. "I knew itwas you! I’d never forget that nose!“
She struggled for a second to place thevoice with a name, and then it hit her. "Bassie! How areyou?” she gushed, a reflex. Sherlock cleared his throat. "Oh,right, Sher—Shireen, Bassie, Bassie, Shireen. I used to go outwith his flatmate Jim,“ she said, lifting her eyebrows toemphasize. Sherlock stiffened next to her, then relaxed. After all,it was five years ago and Sebastian had been cleared of anyinvolvement straight away, so it wasn’t like he was any kind ofthreat.
Bassie put his hand to his ample bosomand made a sad face, obviously in memory of Jim, then reached out toher, eyes and mouth going wide. "Oh my God, though, do youbelieve it? You did hear about it, right?”
“Saw it in the paper. So sad,”she said as convincingly as she could.
“I think he’s still outthere somewhere. He always said he wanted to go to Thailand, I betthat’s where he is.”
Sherlock choked on his cocktail. Sheand Sherlock were two of the only three people alive that knewexactly where Jim Moriarty was, and it was definitely notThailand.
“I wish he’d call me, I’d fly outfor drinks. Any excuse, yeah?” Bassie went on, then winkedtheatrically. "He was so down after you two split. Oh my God! Did you know?“
She tittered and sipped her drink,aware that Sherlock was watching her like a hawk. "Nope. Didn’t even know he was gay, let alone a criminal mastermind, hehheh.”
“Gay,” Bassie rolledhis eyes. "Jim was above labels. Unless it was Westwood orMcQueen, I am I right?“ He glanced behind the bar. "Gotto dash, sweetie, I’m on again in ten with Lady HaHa and getting intothe latex to be one of her little monsters is murder. Stickaround til the end of the night. Please, I’m begging you. I’m doing'This is My Life,’ never a dry eye in the house, you’ll die. Textme, we’ll do drinks sometime.”
He was gone with a flurry ofair-kisses, leaving only a cloud of hairspray and Chanel in his wake.
“He’s really not that campy inreal life,” she said. She remembered him as pretty reserved,actually.
Sherlock let the crazy straw drop fromhis lips, leaving a smudge of lipstick on the plastic. "Mm. Wouldn’t imagine he’d get very far in civil engineering if he were. You never mentioned—"
“Isn’t that your client overthere?” she deflected, pointing to a random stranger. There wasa lot she never mentioned about Jim, and it was going to stay thatway.
“What? Where?”
*
“Oh bugger,” she said whenthe song changed. It was a drag club; it was bound to happen.
“What?” Sherlock asked,perking up, no doubt on guard for another surprise social interactionor something actually related to the case. "And why is everyonelooking at me?“
"The song. It’s Cher. It’s like Rocky Horror, they always do something special for thevirgins.”
“How do they know I'm—”
She ignored him, swigging the rest ofdrink and slamming the glass down on the bar. "Alright, let’sdo this. You’re going to owe me.“ She took Sherlock’s wristand pulled him into the middle of the dance floor. She wouldn’t beany kind of assistant if she let his cover get blown because he was acomplete knob that didn’t know a single song written after 1920, withthe exception of (and God only knew why) Ringo Starr’s discography. Besides, standing around all night in a club full of good-looking,well-groomed men that wouldn’t grope her or press theirawkward boners into her arse was just a wasted opportunity. She’ddrink away her embarrassment later.
"Wh-what are you doing?”
“It’s not what I’m doing,it’s what you’re doing. This song is for you. Startdancing and act like you’re having a good time,” she shoutedinto his ear before she let go of him and went for it.
She felt like the hero in an actionmovie, running through no-man’s land and drawing the bad guys’ firewhile the other part of the team did the thing to save the world. She channelled every liquor-soaked night out after a bad break-upthat she could actually remember as she belted out the opening linesof 'Believe,’ using Sherlock as her prop, dancing against him andsinging to him and oh God there really wasn’t enough booze in theworld for this.
And then nothing in the world madesense because he started dancing. With the music. And lip-syncing. Perfectly; well-rehearsed.
Oh, she was going to kill thatprick. He did things like this to John all the time (and sometimesMary, and Greg once or twice, and his brother whenever he possiblycould), the tit, but she thought she had some kind of… immunityfrom it. Sure, there was probably some reason he’d acted allclueless and then suddenly switched gears, the deception was all partof the plan, always was, but he could have at least trusted her forthat bit like he normally did.
Suddenly the music and dancing and thewhole novelty of a case in a drag club didn’t seem quite as fun andexciting as it did five minutes ago. She powered through the rest ofthe song anyway, dancing her way back to the edge of the floor andletting him have centre stage, just as he’d probably planned from thestart.
She didn’t know why she was hurt by it;it wasn’t exactly a rational or proportionate response. Leaving wasnot a thing an adult woman would do, but she really didn’t want to bethere anymore. It wasn’t like he really needed her for the caseanyway, he could internalize his own executive functioning for onceinstead of making someone else do it.
And then he was suddenly in front ofher, blocking her way to the front of the club. "Where are yougoing?“
"Should be fairly obvious. I’mleaving.”
“What do you mean you’releaving? Are you not feeling well?” He reached out to touchher forehead and she batted his hand away.
“I’m feeling fine. Next timemaybe—” she cut herself off, pressed her lips together. Shedidn’t want to have to shout over the music to explain it to him. Itwasn’t worth it.
“Next time what?”
“Just, finish your thing here,”she said, then walked away. She was only a little let down (thoughnot surprised) when he didn’t follow after her.
*
“Really hoped you’d make more of ascene,” Sherlock said breezily, coming to stand beside her atthe bus stop. She’d only been there a few minutes, though she hadtaken her time getting there. She needed the air to clear her head.
“What are you talking about?”
“When I humiliated you on thedance floor. Thought you’d have a stronger reaction.” Hewinced as he pulled off his wig, pins catching in his hair.
She had a feeling she was about to havethat stronger reaction with whatever he said next. "So it wasall part of your plan.“
"Obviously. Really though, Ican’t believe you thought I didn’t know who Cher is. If I canidentify a gay man by his underwear, it’s a safe bet I know a bitmore about the culture.”
Wait, was he trying to tell hersomething? Mrs. Hudson used to think— But Molly’d never got thatvibe from him (then again, she hadn’t got that vibe from Jim, and,well), and there was Irene Adler and the other one, and he’d neversaid anything in all the years he’d known her, but they didn’t talkabout those kinds of things—
“No, I’m not gay, you of allpeople should know that,” he said, sounding slightlyexasperated.
“Me, of all people,” sheechoed flatly. She felt like it was an insult of some kind and shewasn’t sure why.
He looked at her like he was trying tofigure something out, then looked away; she wasn’t sure what wasbehind that. Whatever, it didn’t change anything.
“So why couldn’t you just tell meto 'make a scene’ when you gave me a signal? I would have gone alongwith whatever.”
“Because I really did need you toleave and I needed it to be authentic. Thought for a minute youweren’t going to. Didn’t have a plan B this time, either.”
“Mm.” She was beginning tounderstand why John reacted how he did sometimes. Right then, shereally didn’t care about the case. He’d obviously solved it, theside of good prevailed, hurray, and the only collateral damage washer trust. It was like he delighted in finding the most convoluted,idiotic ways to get from point A to point B sometimes and it didn’tmatter who was in the way.
“You’re angry with me.”
“Not really angry, no. Disappointed,” she said truthfully. Sometimes she didn’t evenknow why she invested the time in explaining and correcting his badbehaviour.
“And hurt.” It was aquestion.
“A bit.”
“I’m sorry.” His voice wassoft, sincere.
You always are, she thought withan edge of bitterness. She shrugged. It was a stupid thing to behurt over, anyway. She just needed a bit of time to get over it.
They stood in silence for another fewmoments, until Sherlock finally spoke again. "You said I wouldowe you. I owe you… what? Name it,“ he said quietly.
"Doesn’t matter, it was just athing I said. You don’t owe me anything,” she said just asquietly. She really just wanted to forget about it.
“I could put the wig back on andwe could go to a different club. You like dancing,” he offered. He was only half-joking, but she could tell by his voice that herealized this wasn’t the kind of thing he could charm his way out of.
“Maybe some other time,” shesaid, trying to keep her voice neutral.
“Would you—ever… want to? Godancing. When it’s not for a case. After you’re finished beingcross with me,” he said, looking out into the street. He wasn’tlooking at anything, he was just avoiding looking in herdirection.
Any other time she’d wonder if sheheard him correctly, or what kind of angle he was working; she hadthe thought that the timing was too bad for it to be anything but asincere offer. And the way he asked wasn’t the way he asked if shewanted to go grab something to eat after work or if she wanted to gowith him to see this or that new exhibit at whatever museum orgallery. It was like he was afraid she’d say no and the rejectionwould actually mean something.
“Like a date,” she said. Itwas more of a question. She felt like an idiot for even asking, andmaybe it was all just wishful thinking again like the time she’dmisread things so badly before that party, but she couldn’t help butfeel like this time was different.
“You could call it that, Isuppose. Wouldn’t be inaccurate,” he said, finally looking ather out of the corner of his eye.
Her pulse sped up and the part of herthumb she’d grated off throbbed uncomfortably; Sherlock was stillmostly (absurdly) in drag and the night was muggy and the streetsmelled overwhelmingly of wee and spilled beer. It was about as farfrom 'fairytale’ as one could get.
“After I’m finished being crosswith you. And you won’t do anything like that again.”
“I won’t. I truly am sorry.”
“I know.”
They stood in awkward silence foranother few moments until the bus turned the corner at the end of thestreet.
“You’re not actually expecting meto take the bus all the way back to yours as a form of penance, areyou?”
“Tempting, but no. You can usethat magical cab-summoning superpower of yours any time now.”
Sherlock gave her one of those soft,genuine smiles of his and, while making her stomach do the samelittle flip it always did, it made her giggle, too.
“I didn’t even get to make anyjokes about John Waters, RuPaul, or Kinky Boots. So manymissed opportunities. Guess you’ll just have to take another casethat requires High Drag.”
“Ah, no,” he said, swinginghis wig as they walked in the direction of the taxi rank.
“Can’t blame a girl for trying,”she said.
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