#so that's one less thing to worry about :) | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

scatterbrainedbot · 5 months

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Hello :D

You're so cool

Anyway have you thought that in your rat sons au Splinter might outlive the boys?

You're very cool :D love your stuff dude

(tw for some blood, light gore, implied overdose (kinda??))

hi copper!!! this is a fantastic question!

so obviously typical irl rats have far shorter lifespans than the average irl tortoise. according to google (yes, be awed by my spectacularly in-depth wealth of research) the average pet rat lives between 2-4 years ish, and the oldest on record lived to be about 7. meanwhile, an African spurred tortoise (Splinter's species) averages more around a 50ish year lifespan in captivity, tho is suspected to possibly exceed 75 or more in the wild.

Now, the mutation does give us a lot of wiggle room for playing with these numbers. For the rat sons boys, id say their natural lifespan probably clocks in at about 45-55 years old? definitely not old by human standards, but not young young either. (though, its also important to note that the boys were exposed to the mutagen just days after being born.)

For Splinter, meanwhile, aging is slightly more complicated. He lived the vast majority of his life as a regular normal African spurred tortoise (well, non-mutated at least. there were perhaps some shenanigans of a more mystical variety going on before he was mutated, but thats a separate matter) He was about 70ish i think? when the boys were born and they were all exposed to the mutagen. so he is already distinctly an old man turtle papa. id guess he'd probably still have another eh lets say 25-30 years after his mutation. he could probably push it a little farther even with some mystic nonsense, but when push comes to shove id say his 'natural' post-mutation lifespan would put his death like a solid decade or two before his sons.

of course, the tricky part of the matter is that theres no way for Splinter to know any of this. theres no way for him to know how the mutation affected them all, or if it even affected them all in the same way. especially since the boys dont show many physical signs of mutation for the first few years, and just kinda look like normal rats, (albeit with a more human sort of intelligence) — what sort of health standard do you hold them to? what if they simply dont show external signs of sickness or old age anymore? how do you actually know if something is wrong?

for a while there Splinter is very worried that one of his babies will just essentially reach the end of their normal rat lifespan, fall and not get up again.

so mostly, he just tries to live in the moment, enjoying whatever time he does have with his little ones, taking each day as a gift <3

still,

that fear

never

really

goes

away.....

#cue the 2003 tmnt dramatic Shredder sound effect TM #my art #rat sons #tmnt au #ask reply #TOOK ME A FULL MONTH TO ANSWER AND IM STILL NOT SUPER PLEASED WITH THE RESULTS BUT #also apologies if shits incohierent im v sick rn #but thank you so much for the question copper!!#a parents grief and terror at the thought of outliving their children #always gets me #and boy howdy these rat babies do Not make that shit easy for ol Splinter #all of them have brushed too close to death too many times #tbh thats probably why he started teaching them ninjutsu etc #like yeah yeah discpline and routine and practice all excellent lessons #but also #yall squishy babies and ur father is Stressed please learn to fight good so its one less thing he has to worry about #sorry splints theyre hamatos now theyre destined for danger #cw blood #cw gore

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fantasykiri5 · 1 day

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Finished version of yesterday’s Pearl drawing for day 11 for @hermitadaymay !!

#my art #Hermitcraft #hermitcraft fanart #pearlecentmoon #pearlescentmoon fanart #I love the boots I gave her so much. Only thing I think I’d change is drawing them a little bigger in the future #Honestly I think I’ll skip the one that was supposed to be today and draw the idea I had as it’s own thing after the month is over I don’t-#-wanna draw more today #besides it’s a special prompt day I’m less worried about missing those

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kelocitta · 27 days

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Tangentially related to some of the discussion i posted earlier but quiet literally the first RW Art Month i participated I did it completely on whim like, one day before it started. And I mostly did it because I hadn't drawn a ton of rain world and wanted to draw more. Fandom presence was a lot smaller than and I was one of a handful of artists who did the entire thing. Fast forward and I still do Art Month and I've gotten to work with VC directly. But it was quite literally something I decided to do completely on whim that set the ball rolling, and for something a lil more niche and certainly with a lot more dev/fandom art involvement than most. It's really random how and why you might get noticed more than usual, especially with the "toss it into the search and hope it pays out' mechanism of Socmed

#t.extpost #and im hardly the fanciest art month artist out there so it wasnt even about being a jaw droppingly talented artist or whatever #and while artmonth for rw is still given a huge focus its also a much much bigger thing now with a much bigger number of participants #which is cool! its awesome how many people i saw do most if not all of last art month! and VC is really good about not just repping the #most popular artists or fanciest pieces #but theres So Much More there now and while its great for finding artists its also impossible to get Everyone in there you know?#Although they absolutely try #And this is like. one of the most fanartist involved devs ive ever seen in terms of both celebrating the art their fans make and actively #bringing those fans in to contribute #and its /still/ hard to get going just because thats how Posting is #i used to be more of a hk artist which is both a huge fandom and riddled with stunning artists but theres So Many #and niche fandoms are niche so youre more likely to connect with people but less likely to see a ton of engagement regularly -#probably best example i have for that was being briefly fixated on patapon.#Its just messy to try and find the hack that sets you up #just have fun and jump around and make what you like #get a sense of feeling for your style and some people will stick around for that vs. strictly the subject matter #others will look up the thing you switched too and some wont engage #you cant really control it #so have fun and draw that thing you randomly thought about at 2 am that doesnt match your blog #draw for that forgotten rpg you liked when you were 15 or draw for the 70 player max steam game you played for this week #you never really know what will happen #but its not really worth worrying about what will happen either

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chrollohearttags · 4 months

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my whole YouTube feed is filled with videos about the Stanley cup/Sephora kid thing and maybe bc I haven’t used tiktok in months but I’m so lost as to why everybody, including the kids themselves is being blamed for this problem lmao.

#there’s only one enemy and that’s capitalism/consumerism #not to mention the parents who think being an ‘ipad kid’ is cute and quirky bc they don’t want to raise their kids beyond the baby stage #like why are you mad at an influencer who’s job it is to sell a product for not monitoring if ur children are watching #that beauty influencer is not selling to them or for them #they’re a business + brand marketing to other ppl their age #people who can actually afford the products #not somebody who barely has lunch money less known 3 bands to drop on drunk elephant #like I have so many young cousins/kids in my neighborhood who are being brought up this way + it’s the internet’s fault always #not the fact that their parents don’t do anything #and what gets me is that somebody like me who’s made content online like cosplay/anime or even writing fanfic #has to worry about censoring myself for some brat I’m not even thinking abt #and it hurts creatives who are just looking for an escape #when I’m reality the only problem is that these parents are lazy and expect some random youtuber to teach their kids the things they refuse #it takes a village yes but at the end of the day that responsibility lies on the person who birthed them #I’m sorry #cherry chats 🍒

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tinie-alien · 3 months

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Various Doctor Who Stuffies 🥰

#not-so-fun fact: i used to have the red dalek plush but i gave it to a former friend and i regret it to this day 😭#anyway heres a post snjdidis #hopefulyl should be back to making boards soon have just been so stressed out over my kitty #he finally pooed today so thats one less thing to be worried about just hate having to give him his medicine #like i know they taste gross buddy but its gonna make you feel better 🥺😭#agere doctor who #agere dw #fandom agere #stuffies #age regression #agere #bugs alien stuff

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worstloki · 7 months

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sigyn that married loki like ages ago so when it comes out he's jotun she's like. 'well it's a bit late to do anything about that'

#''bit sad to find out about this after his death but i suppose i can't blame him for that :/''#''tell me if he ends up not being dead i think we should sit down and talk about this''#''totally not cool so hide something like this. im going to dye my hair black as charcoal and not even tell him''#''lets see how he likes it''#''the royal family sucks btw. it succ real good.''#''how does someone find out they are secretly from a different realm. how wouldn't they know. couldn't he tell?''#''im not saying it's loki's fault but i think it would be less his fault if he was less dramatic about this kind of thing''#''aaannnndd of course he threw himself off the bifrost by the end of it. do you people know nothing about him?''#sigyn just decides loki isn't dead to cope btw #it's like thor except she doesn't get depressed about it #''shouldn't she move out of the palace since her husband died?'' nah sorry no one can stand bringing up the topic #she roasts them about it #like have you no shame #there is not even a body #are you trying to kick her out? don't you know who she married?#''he's dead'' alright believe what you want but odin and frigga haven't said anything so she's sticking around #sigyn like i have more important things to do than worry about this kind of thing. like managing the vanaheim exports #she needs to make her money

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sysig · 9 months

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Just be honest! (Patreon)

Bonus:

Could be :)

#Doodles #Wander Over Yonder #Emperor Awesome #Commander Peepers #Maybe something less friendship and more something else Eyesome? :3c #Could be :)#Hhhh yet more fun poses and contact points! Especially Awesome's legs and Peepers resting his ''cheek'' on his hand :D #The slight squish upgrading to a full squish with the shape of his eye-cheek changing! I did that and I'm happy about it! Haha ♪#Plus how fun it is to draw him sitting lightly with his arm on his leg ah ♥ His proportions are so fun #Anyway ♪ Lol #Awesome's feeling all introspective and it's giving him the vapours lol #He's a hedonist! A coward! A gossip! Someone who coasts through life with no care to who he steps on! Except ♪#Not me thinking Peepers could be Awesome's Wander lol - ''If I stopped hating that one thing then what was the point of hating the rest?''#As soon as he starts seeing the humanity of one little guy where does that put him ♫#Personally I think he'd still be a mostly selfish jerk - at least for a while - considering how hard realizing he even Likes Peeps would be #Even here he's like ''This sucks! Being friends with you bites and not in the cool way!'' Lol #He's just being a baby and coming to terms with his feelings #And Peepers might possibly be picking up on that a little bit :) It's still comedically optimized not to worry lol ♫#Awesome is only starting to approach his own feelings but he's being very obvious - throwing a tantrum even lol #So Peeps noticing before Awesome realizing he should be hiding it way harder than he currently is - he just doesn't know yet!#Probably both blushing up a storm just before bed that night lol ''Can't believe I said all that to him'' ''He takes me seriously'' hehe <3 #It feels good! Trust and understanding slowly building up :) That's what makes me interested in their dynamic! :D

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craycraybluejay · 1 month

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yes i am an adult male who loves high school dramas this is because i literally never experienced normal coming of age drama like ever and am disconnected from the collective experience of having a relatable peer group forever hope that helps

#i JUST want to experience high school #without like. my whole shitty life thing having gone on #i want to go to high school and have stupid drama and sexuality crises and worries about grades #not... That #i never had that im never going to have that #can i get (one) permission to go a little crazy if i survive into a university #fuck everyone befriend and be-enemy everyone get all up in peoples stupid mind numbingly low stakes drama #i want that sweet golden experience where the worst thing ill ever fear is annoying my classmates #or accidentally spilling something on someone at a dance #i deserve it i deserve to have had a childhood and a young adulthood and a life #i deserve to have dealt with unserious issues to prepare me for bigger ones #rather than serious danger that leaves me permanently severed from normal people and life #and makes me incapable of reacting proportionally or finding it in me to care about less serious problems #like yes it sucks your mom is going to miss college graduation #but i thank my lucky stars that you are not dying or being abused or starved or beaten or exploited #i literally dont know how to take things seriously a lot of the time like im not able to even if i try #because to me the mildest real problem is someone purposefully isolating you and ruining your health #the MILDEST #i try to care ab simple stuff i really do i just CANT #and it sucks so much trying to be a good friend and kind feeling like i cant do enough #the loud thought 'i wish that hapoened to me/i wish i worried about that/i wish the people i love only had that as a problem'#i get so envious. like thank fucking god your parents divorced like normal adults when it should be over #thank fucking god that 'friend' cut you off when they were actively insulting you and betraying your trust #thank the fucking universe that shitty partner dumped you before you fkn hurt yourself over them #yk?#and its a 'mean/cold' way to think about it but i just dont have the capacity to think or feel the little picture #i can imagine my friends subjected to such horror even tho i dont want to

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novuit · 3 months

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I'm now officially in the foster care system forever, yippee!!! :D

#I don't talk about my personal life outside of school pretty much at all #but I have to announce this #I am so happy I have one less thing to worry about now #The court case took like 3 years more than it should have #Ahh I feel so jolly !!#personal rambles

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freejamtime · 11 months

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wowblr!!! perceive my incredibly specific disabled anduin headcanons NOW (ft. a rough few drawings)

#wow #anduin wrynn #world of warcraft #my art #he had 2 get his leg amputated after the divine bell incident btw #azeroth is magic and has a bajillion other things to worry about #so there's very little ableism towards him methinks. most people just think it's cool #his prosthetic is light-infused (idk) and enchanted (as a lot of higher-quality limbs are)#light stuff means he gets less sore if he wears it for long periods of time #he has several variants as a prince post-mop (and even more as king) but post-shadowlands he simplifies to 2-3 #just because he can't really afford to carry around huge legs all the time #his first one was draenei-themed and commissioned by velen #in my wow canon with my brother we decided he's spending time in acherus post-sl #and the dks are used to working among/with/as disabled people #so he doesn't find much trouble taking care of himself or getting things he needs or asking for help even in exile #that's my rant okay

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hella1975 · 4 months

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just think this time tomorrow ill be publicly indecent in a spoons somewhere. i am so strong

#ONE MORE EXAM. WE CAN DO THIS. I WILL BE DONE IN LITERALLY LESS THAN 24 HOURS NOW #AND THEN THE NEXT EXAM SEASON ISNT UNTIL MAY. COME ON GIRL #we have such a fun plan for tomorrow though bc the consensus has just been 'we need to get fucking mangled after this exam'#like i havent been out-out in WEEKS the closest i came was the end of december for a hometown house party of all things #i didnt even go out for nye. let's all take a moment and consider the implications for someone like me NOT GOING OUT ON NYE #so i am OVERDUE a good night out and then on top of that ive had exams be SO fr #and also this is the first year where my main friendship group (i.e not my housemates but my actual social circle)#are ALL econ students like there's about five of us and we all do econ and yeah two of them ive been mates with since first year #(the girl is my best mate at uni and is always who im on about if i talk about a 'girl on my course' and the lad is the one i lived with #in first year and have kind of got a thing with now?) BUT THE OTHERS ARE NEW ADDITIONS AND THAT'S SO FUN #so we're ALL gonna tip out of that exam and then me and her are gonna go back to mine to get ready bc am i fuck doing make-up #before that exam. the STATES i have shown up in these past few days i think the invigilators are worried about me #and then we're meeting the lads at the pub and starting there and THEN going spoons bc it's me and the girl's tradition #(calling her just 'the girl' is so funny. woman 🫵) after exams to buy each other mystery shots at spoons and we HAVE to drink them #and then one of the lads really wants to go to a karaoke bar for some reason?? so that might be in my future #AND THEN we're going clubbing. im so ready. take me home vodka shots. the end is near please please please #hella goes to uni

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tswwwit · 1 year

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do yhink theres like a life where bill accidentally 'kills' himself and isnt able to get to Dipper in time?

so dipper is just there thinking like no one will love me 😔😔💔 with no memories anf bill is just floating around pissed off

then BAM dipper remembers and comes to bills rescue somehow. then it cuts to dipper making fun of bill 🤭

A Fine concept! Alternately: A Dipper who still doesn't have his memories stumbling across Bill, and the subsequent shenanigans.

#answers #I was gonna say that Dipper might recognize Bill but then remembered he'd be in his real form #The triangle is less immediately recognizable after all the time Bill's spent in the human body #I imagine this is very confusing and also eerie for Dipper who has no idea how he got here most likely #Bill though? Oh man #After however long he's spent 'dead' he's having a great time all of a sudden #Now time to convince his unwitting husband to patch up a body and set him free #Who better to do that than Bill himself??? He knows the guy so well!#Not making a deal or anything for it though. Not a real one; he already has one of those in place with this guy #Catch Bill advising Dipper how to vastly improve his life. Riches! Fame! Love! All you gotta do is some life magicky stuff.#It's way simpler than it looks kid. Don't worry about it I'll walk ya through it #And he's technically not lying either! Dipper WILL Have all those things once he does this 'innocuous' life magic thing #Just not in the way a memoryless Dipper would expect #And what do *I* get outta this you ask? Well #Nothing much! But it *will* cost ya something #Namely: A smooch. With *tongue* this time. (He's still annoyed he didn't get it the first deal round)

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liquidstar · 4 months

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wanted to post the royals and co. as a set for reference, though the only new things here are the king+queen and koe's updated design :p also most of them didn't get little infoboxes so those will be a first under the cut here ^_^

Name: Andromeda (Andy)

Name origin: The Andromeda Galaxy, named for the mythical princess

Pronouns: She/her

Age: 20

Title: Heir apparent

Weapon: Flamberge (Same as her mom's)

Ethos (Power): None

Flaw power is based on: N/A

Notes: She wants to go on adventures someday, and make a lot of friends, and be normal. So please drop the "Your highness" and call her Andy!

Name: Cepheus

Name origin: The constellation Cepheus, the king

Pronouns: He/him

Age: 54

Title: King

Weapon: Scepter

Ethos (Power): Authority (The ability to control people’s actions through his words, but not their minds)

Flaw power is based on: His controlling and paranoid nature

Notes: He prefers not to use his ability unless it seems necessary, but ends will justify the means.

Name: Cassiopeia

Name origin: The constellation Cassiopeia, the queen

Pronouns: She/her

Age: -

Title: Queen

Weapon: Flamberge

Ethos (Power): Alis (The ability to generate wings)

Flaw power is based on: Her overconfidence in her own abilities, ironically like a completely different winged mythological figure...

Notes: Before being the Queen, she was the Hero.

Name: Koeia/Koe

Name origin: The star Koeia, whose name literally means "Star"

Pronouns: She/her

Age: 20

Title: Maid/Andromeda's lady in waiting

Weapon: Twin Sickles

Ethos (Power): Blessing (She can make others more powerful through cheering them on)

Flaw power is based on: Her Obsequiousness

Notes: She assures you her devotion to the princess is strictly for non-homosexual reasons

Name: Perseus/Percy

Name origin: The constellation Perseus, the hero

Pronouns: He/him

Age: 21

Title: 1st Knight/Andromeda's personal guard

Weapon: Harpē sword

Ethos (Power): Divine swordstrike (An all-powerful swing of the sword with no limit)

Flaw power is based on: His incredible arrogance and show-offishness

Notes: He assures you that his showy devotion to the princess is as heterosexual as it seems. Also he's the cousin Io from Nova Stella

Name: Ursa

Name origin: Ursa major, the big dipper.

Pronouns: She/her

Age: 38

Title: Major

Weapon: None

Ethos (Power): Bear-handed (Her claws are unbreakable and can slice through any material)

Flaw power is based on: Her hyper-diligence. Her ruthless devotion and adherence. Literally nothing could ever stand in her way.

Notes: She’s the mama bear of Kochab (Ursa minor) from the timber scouts

#reason i wanted to change koe's design was bc i felt like the first one was a bit too basic ig?#wanted to give it more personality beyond being a maid outfit #so a funkier skirt and shorter sleeves and gloves and stuff. idk its more koe and less maid. but still maid #other than that obviously are the two wholly new characters #honestly designing them was interesting in a way bc it was like reverse engineering andys face #i think she takes after her mom more tho #but she also does try to emulate her so thats also part of it #honestly andy is really similar to amary in a lot of ways not just bc of the whole princess thing but the family dynamics to a degree too #there are still some pretty big differences (andy wasnt abused but her father is still really strict and constraining out of worry #and amary's mom was actually kinda the polar opposite of andy's and their emulations are completely different too)#BUT #look read cepheus's flaw. hes not going to be a good guy lol #hes the type that starts out nice enough on the surface but when pushed it will become. again. ends justify the means #very.... 'my way or the highway' type guy i guess. but with power #cassiopeia s more noble than that though despite any arrogance in her skills #its like one side of a balancing act lost #again look at her power. its wings! wings mean freedom! no restraint! touch the sky!#unfortunately kingdoms arent usually about that is the thing #maybe andy can fix it now though #but honestly andy percy and ursa are pretty much all just here for convenience #it wouldve been easier to have a ref post lumping all royals and andy's entourage together. and ursa i guess idk where else shed go lol #i thought abt putting her w the zodiac knights but their theme is too uniform. background color is the same tho so same affiliation #w the royals #also does anyone get my amazing joke. shes a major. major ursa. ursa major. i know i know #ill be here all week #finn's ocs #oc references #finn's art

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godsfavoritescientist · 10 months

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Building off of what I wrote in my fic "Sparks," I'm really compelled by the idea of Ford genuinely no longer being interested in sailing around in a boat with Stan by the time they were seniors in high school.

I like the idea of it not being just a symptom of the resentment that had been building between them, nor it being a dream of Ford's that only paled in comparison to west coast tech, but it being a genuine loss of interest on Ford's end. I think it complicates things even further in some really juicy ways.

Like, imagine going through high school slowly losing more and more interest in the dream you've shared with your twin and only friend ever since you were little kids. How do you break it to him? How do you explain it to him without making it sound like a rejection of him? Without it making him hate you?

How do you explain it without it feeling like a spit in the face to all the hard work he's put into a plan that started out as a way of him comforting you by telling you "it doesn't matter what people say about you, you're going to be an adventurer who sails away into the sunset and never has to hear their mockery ever again, and there will be babes and treasure and heroism, and then they'll all see how cool you really are!"

And all through high school you think to yourself, "he's going to move on to more realistic dreams any day now, and then I won't have to say anything about it!" But no matter how many times you mention something else he could do with his life that he seems interested in, or bring up the challenging logistics of traveling around long-term in a boat, he sounds just as committed to the childhood dream as ever, and completely oblivious to how apprehensive you sound.

So resentment grows, little by little. Because that's easier than confronting the soul-crushing levels of guilt that are building up inside of you, every time you don't take an opportunity to tell him you don't want to do the plan anymore. You don't have a single person in your life who modeled how to have difficult conversations for you. As far as you know, having this conversation with Stan would crush him into tiny little pieces and then he would hate you forever, and you can't stand the idea of losing the only friend you've ever had.

So tensions grow. A lack of interest turns into a bitter resentment that, if you were really being honest with yourself, is directed more at yourself than it is at Stan.

And then the falling-out happens, and it seems like you were proven right. Stan hates you now, and he's never going to forgive you for giving up on his dream. But two can play that game, so you try to hate him too. Because if you hate him too, then maybe it won't hurt as much that he never came back. That he never even turned up at school, or by the boat, or in through your bedroom window in the middle of the night. He knows what dad's like, and how he says impulsive exaggerated things when he's angry, and haven't you both dealt with his harsh words countless times before and been able to dust yourselves off and joke about it later? So why isn't he back at home, joking with you about how absurd your dad acted that night, being impossible and belligerent about ruining your dream, but at least now you're even, because you've ruined his dream too.

And now imagine you find out he risked the lives of everyone in existence to bring you back, right after you had accepted your fate was to die killing Bill. It would be terrifying and confusing and infuriating. If he cared so much, why didn't he do something to reconnect with you sooner? Why did he ignore you in favor of trying to make it big without you? Why didn't he take the infinitely safer and simpler action of reaching out to you without you having to track down his address and send a desperate plea for help? You were convinced that he didn't care enough to bother with you unless you had an important enough reason for him to come. But even then, he thought your plans were stupid. He didn't want anything to do with you, not even with the world at stake.

Did he save your life out of guilt? Does he pity you that much? It doesn't add up with what he did in the decade leading up to shoving you into the portal. And the dissonance between the version of him in your head that hates you, and the man who held out his arms to welcome you back to your home dimension, is so strong that you feel like you're being lied to again, like you're back in the depths of gaslighting and manipulation that Bill put you through, even though there's no way that's what Stan is trying to do... right? You can't figure it out, so you run away from it. You don't want to know the answer to whether or not Stan hates you, because you don't know which answer would hurt more, so you try to make him hate you more than ever, because at least then you would know for sure how he feels.

And in the end, after he sacrifices his memories for you, and for the world, things seem clearer. The layers upon layers of confusion and anger and hurt seem to have washed away like drawings in the sand, leaving behind the simple truth: that you two had an argument, and didn't move past it for forty years, and despite everything you put each other through, you both still want to re-connect.

So you sail away in a boat together.

And at first, it's wonderful. It's exactly what you want. It feels like an apology to Stan, and a thank-you for saving the world, and a once-in-a-lifetime chance to heal the rift between you two, and it's good to be back on earth, and you wonder why you ever doubted the dream you two once had.

But then, after the first long journey you spend on the sea together, when you get back home to dry land, Stan is already talking about planning your next adventure out on the open sea. He recaps every adventure you had on the first trip, over and over again, and he wants to chat with you all through the morning and long into the night, and you don't have the words to explain to yourself that you don't have enough social battery for this, and suddenly you're slipping back into the horrifyingly familiar feeling of Stan being overbearing and needing space from him and how could you think that? How could you think that about him after everything he's done for you and everything he's forgiven you for? But the longer this goes on, the more you realize that you still don't want to spend the rest of your life sailing around with Stan. It's great fun in moderation, but the idea of your whole life revolving around Stan and going on adventures with Stan and being in a boat with Stan with no time to be by yourself thinking about your own things and figuring out your own dreams makes your skin crawl with a claustrophobic kind of panic that you still don't know how to put into words forty years after the first time this feeling grabbed you by the throat and ruined your friendship with Stanley.

But the first time this happened, it nearly ruined his life forever. You can't let yourself feel this. You don't feel this. You're happy to spend the rest of your life fulfilling Stan's lifelong dream, and making up for the time you crushed his dream, and sure, maybe he crushed your dream once too, and maybe it would be nice for him to support your dreams like you're now doing for him, but you can't say that. He saved the universe, and it would be horrible and ungrateful and cruel for you to try to voice these feelings, especially when you don't know how to voice your feelings without it making other people feel like you twisted a knife into their gut. So you try to pretend the feeling isn't there.

You go out on a boat with Stan again. You planned out another incredible journey together, and this should be fun, and you should be happy about this, but the unspoken feeling you shoved as far down in yourself as it could possibly go is eating you alive. The worst part? Stan is starting to notice. You have never been good at hiding your emotions. The trick to it has always been to convince yourself you don't feel it at all, and not think about it, and that has always worked like a charm. But whenever the emotion claws its way back up to the forefront of your mind, you can tell Stan knows something is wrong. So you can't even give him the happy ending he deserves. You can't even convince him that you want to be here on the open seas forever with him, like he deserves. And you keep trying and trying to hide it, but Stan keeps asking in roundabout ways, like "You're being awfully quiet, sixer," and "whats that look on your face?" and eventually it comes exploding out of you like a shaken-up soda bottle dropped on its cap.

And then it's like you're back at home in New Jersey again, standing in the living room while dad grabs Stanley by the shirt. It all comes pouring out of you, in the worst possible way, with the worst possible phrasing, like a pandora's box of monstrousness, and Stan tries to fight back against the sting of your words, but you're made out of acid and you're burning through him and you can see it on his face, and there's never any coming back from this, not this time, you'll just have to either jump into the ocean or become a monster forever, so Stan can hate you more easily again, and-

-and at the end of the outburst, you're still on a boat in the middle of nowhere in the ocean with your brother, in dangerous waters, and you have things to do to keep the boat running smoothly.

You can't run away from him. He can't run away from you. You're stuck here for at least a couple more weeks, even if you turned around and sailed back towards shore right away.

And the thing that compels me so much here, despite how unbelievably angsty it all is, is that it sets up a situation wherein the Stans might end up forced to actually address the decades of resentment and confusion and wanting-to-reconnect-throughout-it-all that they thought they could gloss over and heal with enough time spent adventuring together on a boat. They might end up forced to actually address the crux of the issue that drove them apart in the first place: Ford wanting a little more space to feel like his own person, and to feel like he's able to have his own dreams, too.

It wouldn't happen easily, nor right away, but if they were stuck together on a little boat in the middle of nowhere surrounded by magical creatures they have to protect each other from in order to make it back home alive, then after they had one fight where they brought up all the things they silently agreed to never bring up again, it would probably happen many more times, and each time it would leave them both angrier at each other than ever, until eventually something honest slipped through amidst all the saying-anything-except-what-they-mean bickering. And once enough of these honest moments slipped through, then they would have a thread to tug on to start to unravel the gargantuan knot of their decades of unresolved conflicts.

And then, eventually, maybe Stan could learn that he can have a good friendship with his brother without needing to be glued to him at the hip, and Ford needing a certain amount of alone time doesn't mean he dislikes him or wants to abandon him, and Ford could learn that he can be honest and have a meaningful connection with someone without it driving them away and making them hate him.

#succumbed to the stan twins angst visions and wrote 2000 words about this #ford pines #ford meta #this turned into a character analysis that almost reads like a fic #godswriting #<- i need to change my writing tag to this #something bothers me a little bit about the solution to their conflict being 'ford appreciates stan more now so he is now fine with-#-boat adventures with stan'. to me it leaves the initial conflict of 'he doesnt want to do that anymore' unresolved #obviously you could easily argue that ford never stopped wanting to go on boat adventures with stan and he just couldnt justify it to-#-himself when compared to the opportunity at west coast tech. but that has one less layer of conflict #compared to the possibility that he truly was not interested in boat adventures anymore. ESPECIALLY if its a manifestation of him #feeling suffocated by the whole dynamic-twins-duo thing #its normal to start wanting a little bit more space especially at that age. to want to have space to figure out who you are #the healthy thing would have been them talking about it and figuring out a compromise. like 'when ford needs space he can spend a few hours #-alone without stan being worried the whole time that it means ford hates him' and 'we still spend x amount of time working on the boat and #-we still chat on the way to and from school every day and hang out at the beach on weekends'#like of fucking course it was never about hating stan or about wanting to get away from him because of who he is as a person!#he literally just wanted to have a little bit of breathing room to be his own separate person. he just didn't know how to put it into words #I really think the crux of it all was them not knowing how to navigate that balance between independence and identity while staying close #so ford misattributing/reducing that feeling to 'I dont have the exact same dream as stan anymore. why does he still have that dream. oh no #feels like a good way of giving that conflict a tangible aspect to it thats easy for the stans to point at and talk about as a way of-#-alluding to the REAL core of the conflict between them.#and of course the show never says 'they sail around the world for the rest of their lives 24/7' so it's not like it Actually Conflicts with #-my interpretation of the conflict and how it should be resolved. but since its the last thing we see happen between them when theyre given #their happy ending. I feel compelled to say 'hey I know them living in the shack together and traveling in a boat every single year sounds-#-really fun and like a satisfying ending but I think they should have a Little Bit more space from eachother than that. Hanging out almost-#-daily but not literally being in the same house and same boat for the rest of their lives. bc if stan was ok with ford asking for that-#-little bit of space and if ford didnt panic and isolate himself from everyone whenever he needs like one hour of alone time? that would-#-feel like a big piece of the puzzle fitting into place for their conflict resolution and growth as characters. to me #and I think they deserve to have all the tied-up-loose-ends and resolved-conflicts and character-growth in the world.

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