#so so SO grateful for this show in general
Note
This might seem like a weird thing to get hung up on, but in reference to your post about Wyll's hairstyling, someone made the comment that they imagined Mizora used magic to braid his hair as part of their pact. You replied that this was a racist idea and offered to explain why, but they never commented back. If you're still willing to discuss it, I actually would like the explanation. I'm not disagreeing that it's racist, I just think I'm missing some of the nuances/reasoning.
The only explanation I can think of is the way that Wyll's relationship with Mizora is treated, both in and out of game, just makes the joke really not funny. I hate that Mizora is treated as a quirky, love-to-loathe-her side villain when she's essentially Wyll's abuser. She should be treated with the same gravitas that the writers treat Astarion's relationship to Cazador, or Karlach's relationship to Zariel. Then you've got the fans, who can write loads of rants and analysis of Mystra "grooming" Gale on what I would consider very little basis (adults can have teachers too), but stay pretty mum about Mizora, who started manipulating Wyll when he was 17, isolated him from any support systems he might have had, and literally tortures him with the torments of Hell for disobeying her. I forget which conversation it is, but Wyll even describes her visits to him after he completes a task for her as her "saying all the right words" and "touching him in just the right ways."
Maybe I just haven't seen people talking about it because I'm not looking in the right places, I tend to keep most fandoms at arm's length so I'm not swallowed whole by their nonsense. I'm sorry if this turned into an extra long vent message, but I hope it shows I care about Wyll as a character and the work you're doing in general to improve the portrayal of black characters in fiction and fandom.
I mean, you pretty much said it all. I mentioned in my hair lessons that hair is very important to Black people, and that it's also a matter of consent. You wouldn't want just anybody touching your body, and that includes your hair, yes? So it would be incredibly violating for some white person that is essentially your abuser touching your hair, your body, something that is important to you! How can there be real consent if someone OWNS you? Hair is something that requires trust and intimacy. Especially with the idea that a white person would know better how to do your Black hair?! No thanks.
It's also something that ties into my most recent lesson with stereotypes, plus issues with how men are perceived with abusers. The idea that a boy should be "grateful" that a woman is attracted to/attached to them, even when it's inappropriate. For me, what I see when I see Mizora is a white coded woman allowed to mistreat a young Black boy into his adulthood, and treated as though he brought it on himself, as if he deserves to be mistreated by someone who took advantage of him. I see that people won't take that violation seriously, bc no one cares about the dignity of Black bodies nor do we offer them grace under fire.
Whereas if this were a young white girl, and an older Black coded male demon had done these things to her, all hell would break loose. Fans would immediately understand that that sort of relationship is not appropriate and we should not just assume that "oh well it's just sexy".
I mentioned in the last lesson that this sort of "attraction" has gotten Black boys and men killed at the whims of white women. It's not "funny" to me to think that some white coded woman is allowed to treat Wyll that way and everyone is just... Cool with it. I'd be very nervous to ask your opinions on real Black people.
It's honestly why I felt uncomfortable getting interested in the fandom to begin with, in addition to everything else involved with Wyll and his VA Theo. BG3 doesn't seem like a welcoming place fr, and I too have to keep fandom at an arms length for racism reasons, but as I've done with fandom before this: that's my chance to maybe create something that's missing. 👍🏾
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Reactions to Crazier Bastard's Chapter 305
Brief summary: 5 people from CP came. HD meets his disciples, Clopeh and Hannah. HD wants to spar with CH.
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The first batch of CP people came, and they were:
Heavenly Demon - leader of the Demon Cult
Fist King Mok Hyeon - representing the imperial family
Jegal Mi Ryeo - female general commander of the Murim Alliance's military force; Caleism believer (?)
Tang Yu - Poison Queen; 50 y/o matriarch of the Tang Clan of Sichuan
Sima Jung - Trash of the Evil Alliance; son of Sima Pyeong, the Evil Alliance leader; Toonka's friend
All of them were surprised to see Cale's true appearance. Sima Jung immediately searching for Toonka was cute though. 😂 There was a funny scene between him and Raon:
Sima Jung: I greet the great elder.
Sheritt: ??? eyes shaking
Sima Jung: My father told me to always ask the great elder how he is, and to treat him with courtesy.
Raon: tilts head ??? Sima Jung-ya! Why am your great elder? I'm only 7 years old!
Sima Jung: No. He is my father's teacher, so I should call him with a great title, but please understand that I have not forgotten the lessons of the great elder, so I can only call him this.
Raon: Hmm. I don't mind!
Sima Jung: That's what I want to do. Great elder.
Raon: Then do so!
Cale: confused
Fist King: Before we came here, he was beaten up by Sima Pyeong for three days and nights.
Cale: Aha. immediately understands
Sima Pyeong is a great dad... 😂😂😂 Now if only Deruth had disciplined trash Cale... but I guess everyone secretly knew that og!Cale was just acting trash? Anyway, Sheritt's reaction to her son being called great elder was so funny. 🤣🤣🤣
If I recall, Jegal Mi Ryeo was somehow converted (?) to Caleism in the CP arc by the end, so I'm now excited to hear Kim Hae-il's current reputation in CP. Did Cale get more murim titles? 😂
What happened to Tang Yu was sad. The Dragon Lord of Aipotu destroyed her hometown of Sichuan, and half of her clan died during that time. Fortunately, the kittens were interested in her. Tang Yu and Hong recognized each other's poison, and On (and Ron) seemed to be interested in her assassin-like skills.
While the four were led to their rooms by Ron, Cale personally guided HD to HD's assigned room in the Black Castle. Why? Because Cale wanted HD to meet his "disciples", the people who inherited his power.
Hannah was acting awkward, but grateful to HD. But she was shocked when HD said she swung her sword ignorantly. She thought he was calling her ignorant, but HD was actually complimenting her. He said that it was just her style, and did not mean she herself was ignorant.
However, HD said that CH would be a better teacher to her. He described HD as someone who pretended to be gentle but was clever, and pretended to be ignorant but was troubled a lot. If you think about it, Hannah and CH are similar. Well, except the gentle part? Did Hannah ever pretend to be gentle in the past? Ah, that's right. She was gentle when in her holy maiden days.
Clopeh though... 😂😂😂 HD correctly figured out that he was a snake bastard, and both Cale and Raon were impressed. 😂HD described Clopeh's sword to be like an imoogi, and that Clopeh had the potential to surpass CH. Clopeh kept smiling all the time, and CH just shrugged.
The author showed her bias towards Clopeh again. Like, is there a need to mention his white hair and green eyes every time he appears in a chapter? Or be constantly reminded that he had a noble or holy appearance and smile? 🤣🤣🤣
HD was such a Male Lead-like character, and I think a lot of people agree, perhaps even the author herself. He even dropped the famous "How interesting" line (to his disciples). And then being revealed to be the most powerful person in Central Plains. I want to be excited with his upcoming spar with CH, but knowing the author, this would happen behind the scenes.
Ending Remarks
I am so happy to see the CP people again, especially HD. 🥰 Next up would be Cale's talk with Exion regarding the Dragon Lord. Hopefully, this would be short as I would like to see Cale's interaction with the CP people again.
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It's my birthday! So I'm just gonna post random hyunjin pictures I have on my phone. Honestly i am so grateful that despite my reluctancy to get into kpop, the universe showed me skz and therefore brought me into the wonderful world of stayville and kpop in general. Despite the many bad parts of the kpop community and industry, there are so many idols and fans that truly love what they do and I can't help but that straykids are some of those idols. The love they show stays melts my heart and of course stays give equal amounts of love right back at them. So in conclusion, thank you straykids for making mine and so many other stays lives better by existing 💕
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writing down my thoughts as I rewatch “Pabu”, this is the most incoherent I’ve ever been, be prepared ROFL
what planet are they on in the opening scene? how long have they been hanging out with Phee? has she been in regular contact with them ever since “Entombed”? I NEED TO KNOW
love that Omega was at the table with Phee the whole time, and Phee used the excuse that she was teaching Omega her trade, we love to see it 🥰
I RECOGNIZED STEVE BLUM’S VOICE INSTANTLY AND NEARLY WENT FERAL
Phee handing that poisoned drink to Omega was really funny to me for some reason LOL
Hunter and Wrecker. HUNTER AND WRECKER. LORDY HELP ME. as if I wasn’t already in love with those two... D A M N 😍😍😍
nah fr Hunter flinging his blade at that worm was LITERALLY SOMETHING I WROTE IN MLWTBB OVER A YEAR AGO WTF
I just need that entire fight sequence embedded behind my eyelids plz, it was SO good \o/
TECH PLAYING SOLITARE ON TOP OF GONKY, I DIED 🤣
all of Phee’s comments about Omega, gurl knows what’s up (and Hunter totally agreed with her)
why was that message from Cid so freaking ominous??? ma’am??? where did this animosity come from all of a sudden??? srsly I feel like the “Cid is a villain now” thing came out of nowhere (despite what happened in “Faster” but I digress... idk it just doesn’t sit right with me ok lskjdfgklfdkj)
they’ve been away for THREE WEEKS doing what exactly???? hanging out with Phee??? traveling to nowhere in particular???? I NEED ANSWERS PLZ
I can NOT believe Pabu is literally just Palma Flora (a city in Wildemount that I set my DnD campaign in 2 years ago). literally the events that happened in this episode were VERY similar to that adventure from the Wildemount guide, and I am cackling about it haha
Phee literally being female space Indiana Jones was not on my bingo card, but I’m not complaining about it, good for her \o/
NOT WRECKER WITH THE “you’ve got some competition!” TO TECH I LEGIT LOST MY MIND OMFG
SERIOUSLY I CAN’T BELIEVE TECH/PHEE IS ACTUALLY HAPPENING I THOUGHT IT WAS A JOKE LSKJFGUIHGLFKDJ
the way Tech stopped when Phee started walking to the museum.... BRUH. DOES YOU HAVE A CRUSH MAYHAPS 👀
Omega immediately befriending Lyana made me SO happy, she finally has a friend her age (which I KNOW Phee thought of on purpose, she brought them all there for OMEGA’S sake, I KNOW IT) 🥰
“do you know everyone here?” “of course! we’re all like family!” YOU DON’T SAY 👀👀👀
THE MONKEYS. they’re so cute and I want 20 of them thanks 🥰
“I... have not heard her laugh like that in some time” *SCREAMS INTO MY HANDS*
to no one’s surprise, I’ve been monitoring Hunter like a HAWK, and I’m pretty sure that man never stopped smiling from the moment they landed on Pabu OMFG. I know everyone is talking about Omega’s happiness, but HUNTER WAS HAPPY TOO. FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER. AAAAAAAAAAAAA
speaking of...
“as a father, you couldn’t ask for a better place to raise a child”
*INHALES SHARPLY*
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
literally I was SHAKING after that line, I am a WRECK and I will NEVER RECOVER
ALSO
“a little stability might do you all some good“ I HAVE LITERALLY BEEN SAYING THAT THE ENTIRE TIME THANK YOU PHEE
it’s not just for Omega, they ALL need this, they ALL need a safe place where they can just live life and not have to worry about anything, PLEASE they need it so bad 😭
space sushi is canon. SPACE SUSHI IS CANON. HALLELUJAH \o/
the way Hunter told Omega to “have fun”... MY DADGUM HEART. SIR. I’M ALREADY IN LOVE WITH YOU PLZ 🥺😭💙
“I’m full! I am NEVER full!” STOOOOOOOP. this poor man has never had a decent meal in his LIFE, I am SOBBINGGGGGGG
and then Tech “I will note the date and time to commemorate such a momentous occasion” PLZ SLKFJGHGLFKDJS
crying actual tears at Omega out on the boat, smelling the ocean, feeling the sun on her face, and reminiscing about Kamino... MY SWEET BABY 🥺🥺🥺💙💙💙
and then Lyana with “doesn’t that get lonely” after hearing that they’ve never stayed in one place for very long... GURL. I FELT THAT. I LIVED THAT. O O F 💔
Phee practically dragging Tech over to the corner to see the lights; she even grabbed his wrist, the menace. she’s got it BAD for him, and he totally feels the same way, I LOVE THEM 🥰
Hunter noticed the monkeys were acting weird, but I KNOW he also felt the vibrations in the earth before anyone else. my man is just that good ok 😌
are tremors common for islands like that? I have no knowledge on the subject. my initial thought was OMG THE ISLAND IS ACTUALLY A DORMANT VOLCANO because of the shape of it?? idk LOL
Hunter ABSOLUTELY could feel the vibrations. “I don’t think it’s over yet” HE KNEW. HE COULD FEEL IT. HE’S THAT GOOD 😤
the fact that it’s been 30 YEARS since the last sea surge, and another one just so happened on the same day TBB showed up. @jam-n-ham and I joked that they brought a curse to the island ROFL
the warning alarm sounding like a foghorn was a nice touch 👌🏻
all of that water receding so quickly was TERRIFYING 😰
Hunter quickly taking charge and telling everyone what to do in his usual calm demeanor, my GOSH I love this man 😩💙
Wrecker sticking with Shep while Phee stuck with Tech, no surprise there 🤗
Omega sounded so scared when she called Hunter, oh my poor baby 😭💔
Tech and Phee with the grappling hook 👀😏
Wrecker immediately picking up the old guy and running off with him, I love him so much 😂
this episode marked the THIRD time we got pilot Hunter, and I am LIVING for it. Tech, please give him the wheel more often 😍🥰
also, I am suddenly reminded of “why is Omega hanging off the ship?!” after rescuing the girls; how’s that for an unscheduled study break? 😝
Wrecker putting the old guy on his back and climbing up the ladder like it was NOTHING 🥵
honestly, one of the most heartwarming things was seeing all the people helping each other during this crisis. when Wrecker came up the ladder, several people grabbed the old guy and helped him up, then several more grabbed Wrecker when Shep was about to fall. Shep was right, the whole island is like one big family 🥺💙
that shot of the island from the following day was devastating 💔
Tech and Phee still hanging out; he literally is just following her around now 😁
WRECKER OMEGA AND LYANA SLEEPING UNDER THE TREE 🥺🥺🥺💙💙💙
absolutely OBSESSED with that moment between Tech and Phee when she stops him, what am I saying, I’m obsessed with all the moments between them, I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS IS CANON FR LDKFJGHJUIGOFLDK
Hunter wanting to stay so they can help rebuild the damaged homes 🥺 as if he needed another excuse to stay amiright 😜
“I had the same idea” “did’ya now?” SLDFJGHIOHGLFDKSJHD
SRSLY THEIR SMILES AT EACH OTHER HELLO??????? YOUR HONOR THEY’RE IN LOOOOOOOOOOVE 🥰🥰🥰
the fact that Shep reiterated that they’re welcome there... y’all they finally have a HOME 😭😭💙💙
and that’s it! end of the episode. man. just pure serotonin from start to finish 💙
and yeah, I know we all have the same thought. “it’s not gonna last!!” WELL MAYBE THIS TIME THINGS WILL BE DIFFERENT HUH, EVER THINK OF THAT???
I honestly think we’re meant to assume the worst, but it’ll end up being ok. sure, Omega getting captured by the Empire is absolutely still going to happen. but I think Pabu overall is going to remain a safe spot for them to return to, similar to Ord Mantell. they’ll finally have a real home. and it would be completely dissatisfying to have that all taken away just for the sake of ✨drama✨. let this show be the ONE time everything turns out ok in the end, please Jen and Brad, I am BEGGING you 😫🙏🏻
#the bad batch#star wars the bad batch#tbb season 2#anyway I'm going to have this episode on repeat until next week thanks#for the rest of my life actually#this might be my new favorite episode of the show PERIOD#my heart is SO full after seeing this#what a prime example of that SW hope that the franchise promotes#so so SO grateful for this show in general#I'm getting mushy and emotional all over again#sldkfjgsldkfjs#star warz#tbb spoilers
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the way i would pay for oliver to write meta about buck's character
#like. he Gets it. i've been thinking about buck in this ep for five days straight and he said it better in one sentence than any paragraph#i could ever come up with#people are arguing over whether buck#acted the way he did bc he wanted tommy's attention or eddie's attention or bc he was feeling left out or whatever but i don't think it's#any one thing i think it was just a general feeling of Wrongness when tommy showed up borne from thirty years of repressing his sexuality#and he tried to rationalize it as jealousy or whatever and worked through the fact that his behavior was completely unreasonable but#it wasn't until tommy kissed him that all of the rage that was trapped inside him was allowed to escape bc he finally had a name for it#he's been turning over parts of himself for years trying to find that final piece and getting more and more upset when it eludes him#n this kiss was the kind of cathartic relief that he so desperately needed bc it allowed him to understand what's been missing#anyway. oliver stark i love you so much i'm so grateful you play buck#buck#rae.txt#911
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I am never going to shut up about how happy it makes me that CRWBY loves Bumbleby. Just knowing there are people who worked on the show who have said they're obsessed with the Bees and who requested to work on their confession scene just makes my heart feel so full.
I still can't stop thinking about how the bridge scene is one of, if not the most beautiful scene in the whole show. What it represents and conveys is also beautiful, but my god the way it looks? It's absolutely unreal and knowing how much the people who worked on it loved it makes it even more beautiful.
#Annie babbles about RWBY#Bumbleby#I am just#So endlessly grateful for what they've given us#And the love and effort they poured into it because they love it as much as we do#This applies both to the Bees and the show in general
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They only fetishize queer people. Especially our pain. We are not real, entire human beings to them. The celebrate the straight couples - their relationship, intimacy n all; fetishize the bodies of queer men; n fetishize the idea of queer women.
The extent to which they tolerate our sexuality is the short snippets in promo clips. They only want to exploit our online engagement. Ironically our viewership might be bringing in the ad buyers who r trying to erase us.
They try to erase the specificity of the "queer" part, but only use the pain, the convenient stereotypes, the virtue-signaling part to gain brownie points n for good drama. They joke about cultural appropriation n did exactly that during the pride episode with the straight couple's proposal. Same-sex marriage. What are you talking about? It's about queer hate n straight allyship.
They capitalize on the "women" part, to further fetishize our biology. So if it's 2 women in a relationship - it's double the drama about making babies, bad genes, n jokes about hormones n our body parts. But it's 2 women, how can they possibly manage w/o "big, strong, sensitive", straight men with good genes to contribute n overflowing empathy to deal with them being emotional n hormonal?
It's 5b, it's pride, it's the burning man all over again. First they elevate Jack, now Beckett. Pride was about cheating queer men n high queer woman. An intimate scene of Marina must be minimized n hidden among the others' or edited to death in a montage. It's as scary as a man burning to death.
The fact that they haven't even shared a proper kiss this season through any joyful or emotional moment... They just come up with more ways to obscure the kiss, if any. Bad lighting, bad angles n bad editing are prerequisites. They r also written into the script.
Of course they make an important life decision in the NICU, n it's completely inappropriate for a married w|w to share a quick kiss - which we saw via the back of their heads. Unlike a gay man having sex with an ex at the funeral of the ex's dad - while cheating on his partner - twice. Perfectly lit with no obstructions of course.
Even in their ugly kitchen they're assigned, with a perfectly good scene setup, nope. Too brightly lit for queer woman - save it for a long morning kiss b/w gay men in their nice kitchen.
Emotional scene about Carina's fertility issues and reciprocal IVF - okay a kiss allowed grudgingly - but just 0.5 sec. Their lips touched. You get the idea. Why are you fans so demanding? Time is reserved for the 101th proposal of the straight couple n their extended kisses. A proper Marina love scene? You perverts. More explicit sex scenes b/w straight couples are needed.
I don't want to rehash about Jack. I've said plenty about Beckett. Just that men's mistakes are dismissed and minimized. It is not enough to show every painful step of Maya apologizing and making amends. Maya and Carina must also be used to make the audience sympathize with Jack and Beckett. It is a deliberate yet thoughtless choice to use Carina's SA trauma to sympathize with Jack. Just as it is to use Maya's family trauma to sympathize with Beckett. Esp the context of the shot. It is esp violating. They might as well just get Jack to show up for this. They never really got it, did they?
However one chooses to justify these choices, it's not only unnec but wrong to include the men. Esp not Beckett - the man who bullied her for months till her breakdown. Even if he never apologized and they insist on using Maya's pain to make him look good in his redemption arc, idc at this point, but this is just not the time.
If it must be a man, get Travis. Make it a conversation b/w queer people, about queer hate, about their families. Travis sympathizing with Maya, about a journey he wouldn't know about. Way better than jokes on hormones with the guys. A cheap way to get a laugh at an arduous process. I thought we left 5b n mocking queer women behind.
It could have been one beautiful scene with Andy and Vic. They haven't had a proper one since s1 & 2. They would have understood about Mason, if not for their long friendship, there's 703. It could have been about the pain women go thru - Andy and Vic about their abortions or Maya about experiencing what Carina underwent... The show really isn't big on female camaraderie.
But it should really be Carina. Among all the scenes of Carina in the station bathroom - which have been a lot - this is probably the most appropriate if they must set it there. Definitely more so that her own insemination, which was ridiculous.
These are moments that they should only share with each other, privately n intimately. These precious moments that are dwindling - few n short to begin with. It's not irl, it's one scene in an ensemble show. They sure could have romanticized this. It doesn't even have to be half as dramatic as a regular scene of their golden couple. D & S will create magic.
Esp in this episode, there's so much to unpack. With everything they've been thru on their own, the ending could have been about them at home, checking in n sharing their day. Talking about the lawsuit, the hate on queers, their brothers, the boundaries they had to set with their families... Doing the trigger shot together - esp after their emotional scene in 705 n to cap off the morning scene. A perfect setup for their emotional n physical intimacy.
But of course it didn't happen. Other important moments in their lives about their new home n new baby were also short parts of wordless montages. They are even less important than scenes of the others having drinks n sex.
Queer women just don't matter.
#sorry if i sound too negative or snarky#i'm quite done being diplomatic#i try not to rant cos usually i start it gets long#i'm just really tired#with the string of cancellations#n this last season#n this is what we're getting#this is not about my hate#it's about their hate of us#I really tried to be positive n happy about the show in general#n the good scenes the other characters get#believing marina will get their turn#but the bias against queer women is just so blatant#we're only asking to be treated fairly#i'm too tired to try to rationalize n defend their choices anymore#even with paige - travis's sl is filled with neg stereotypes#if they had a queer woman as showrunner this season#maybe it'll be slightly better#maybe she can insist that the nuances matter#but i think there's sth else happening bts#how is 10pm slot worse than 8pm...#not on twitter#but if there's backlash#marina fans will be blamed#we should be grateful for whatever?#station 19 comments#station 19
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why is it that every single interaction hayden has, he's so down to earth and humble, shows real emotion and doesn't give polished sparkling celebs talks--- how can you be so precious after all the grief morbid fandom put you through in the 2000s god if i was him i'd be long since sith no lies
#hayden christensen#i always avoid watching interviews or generally even knowing the names of actors#bc more often than not-- they disappoint and it becomes harder ( not impossible but harder) to love their work for it#hayden on the other hand just makes me love his work even more#how much heart he puts into it even 20 years layer even after the overwhelmingly bad feedback he had for years#he still came back and he was not jaded and he was not cynical#he was grateful and humble and genuine like what the hell?!#he even teared up when fans cheered for him as anakin... and how touched he is to be accepted into the fandom at last...#just watched a video of him being so sweet to someone who showed him anakin art-- like being all amazed that he drew it and complimenting#damn it he's just too good#hayden#buns.txt
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I was just thinking about how much writing fan fiction completely altered my life. I hadn't written anything in years before fanfic came along. Finding a community like this was truly life-saving several times, and I'm so grateful.
#feeling legit teary about it#like I can't believe this life#this also goes for shameless in general#like I would be really depressed but look forward to an episode so I was like “can't unalive before the new ep comes out”#and I had a life-altering injury where I couldn't walk#and that's when I found the show#and I started live in season 4#and I'm still monumentally grateful to YouTube for knowing I like my content gay af
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↑ Last week when I slept through the alarm, but slid through just in time.
This week, I woke up at the alarm and started watching your stream right before my sister came over needing help with one of her research assignments that was due at 11. So as I reviewed her work, I watched your stream in Picture-in-Picture mode but didn't ever say anything. I missed out on chatting with you and ItsaaGaru, but I wanted you to know I was there in spirit!! Literally always the highlight of my Saturday morning 💞💖💝
HI OMG BESTIE... I am happy you were there even if you couldn't find the time to say anything!! I'm sure your sister was absolutely grateful for your help and well, we all want a piece of you but what can we do!!
You know, I really do struggle a lot with streaming every week even though it's really not difficult at all. When Saturday night rolls around for me, I always feel exhausted and maybe a bit overwhelmed if I'm not caught up with all my work. But a few weeks ago I had this revelation that it was difficult to reach you via texts or asks or DMs, BUT you would almost always show up to my stream... I was like okay. well I HAVE to stream otherwise I'll never get 2 talk to Gary EVER. do you want that. to never talk to gary ever. and that's how I've been getting myself to hit that start streaming button these past few weeks
#just thinking thoughts...#hiiii omg hiii#asks#midnight-revelation#hiii <3 <3 <3#but yeah streaming is just like studio classes...#I'm always like I don't want to do thissss#but then I show up and it's ohhh this is so fine... I am having a good time...#I'm not mad that I can't reach you any other way btw. I know you've got a busy life and everything#I'm beyond grateful that you try and set aside an hour or two every week to keep me company#And I'm sorry they're at such horrible hours I'm SO sorry :sob:#and well. I mean. I'd be down to schedule some voice calls with you... if you were ever interested in that...#I'd be able to do it during your evening times too. once a week or once every two weeks maybe...#once a month even if that's too much#uhm. only if you're interested. hahaha#sorry I feel like general tumblr practice says to answer asks privately but like... consider... I want to keep a copy of this sweet message
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It's times like these, where TJ has incredibly stupid and one-sided onscreen beef with Kristina, and the surrogacy story not hitting a single beat, that I am so, so glad that: (1) I decided to write "how to keep house while drowning" and (2) that it has as much engagement as it does.
#general hospital#i am so so grateful for the views and all the comments!!#it means so much to me for it to get the attention that it does#and fuck this terrible show for not even attempting to try!! get on my level!! 😤
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mentioned this yesterday but man idk if its bc im coming off of a much better show, but the dub voice acting in jn suddenly feels really really grating to me
#like its better than the other post-recast seasons but idk#i used to like robinsons goh here but suddenly it feels like hes too much. i get gohs an emotional character#but it feels like hes screaming his head off too often#again tr is very grating in general but here it REALLY sounds like they’re putting on schoolyard mocking voices#other characters just sound off like theyre either talking too softly or theyre also just putting on a mocking voice#like rinto (gallade trainer) speaks very quietly in the dub and it sounds odd to me#idk. i know people mock the rgu dub and its not that good yeah#but at least the stilted performances sorta help the show in a way. like lillis is genuinely really good#and the voices are silly without feeling downright insulting#and the stitled vibe of it all helps the offputting weird atmosphere of it. like theres kind of a point to it#but w the pokemon dub its just. kinda embarrassing?#like the rgu dub is charming and so are the earlier pokemon seasons really but late pokemon not so much#echoed voice#it feels unfair to compare these two shows theyre not even in the same world of quality but i cant help it
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so glad i have therapy tonight im. Ready to talk about scary things
#gonna talk more seriously about hrt. im so scared but theres been Enough happening that makes me feel. ready ig#it's the yearning it's the longing it's the being envious of my friends when i am actually overjoyed for them#it's the i want to be a visibly trans philosopher it's the fathers day special on npr that made me sob in my car#it's the singing along w my favorite songs makes me cry it's the i dont sing on the rare occasion i go to church it's the. uh.#i don't go cuz i want to i go because i want to see what's being shared in the sermon bc that's what people take messages from#mini book reports and challenging the passages selected bc sometimes they are Vague or whatever#it's the i have a complicated relationship w religion in general lmfao#i am very scared of ruining my relationship w my parents though#im incredibly lucky and incredibly grateful every day that i had a good childhood and good relationship w them#never ever want to take that for granted#but im terrified bc i told them my name and mom carefully didnt show a reaction and dad uh. idk we were at starbucks and i did the order#bc im a starbucks girlie zillennial#and i gave my name and he went 😶🤨#this is my blog i can say what i want here but im baring my soul in the tags becauee i trust ~3.2k strangers more than my father xo#anyway#blah blah blah in the tags
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one brain one thought and it’s that anyone who posts ginny miller hate owes me $50 bucks
#can’t see a single post ab the show without someone bitching about how she’s whiny or ungrateful and i just have to SCREAM#ginny is literally fucking right!!!!!!!!! oh my god!!!!!!#the amount of people coming out like she should be grateful to georgia she should be worshipping the ground georgia walks on is so DISTURBI.#..ING as someone who generally empathizes with georgia and finds her sympathetic.. NO the fuck#imagine fandom having any capacity to digest nuance#ginny and georgia spoilers
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i love making things for my friends!! i love it when my friends enjoy the things i make them!!!!!
#ramblies#i just appreciate them all so much. its the little things- the pins ive made them on their bags‚ the art ive made them as icons on socials#maybe its not much to them but its everything to me to know that the little things ive spent a little time making are worn#like badges of honor. its so special to me.#like‚ generally now i just feel so valued. my relationships are natural and reciprocal.#its like... finally!! THIS is what ive been fucking missing this whole time!! this ease!!#i dont need to prove myself‚ to compensate‚ to ask for reminders that im valued. they show me all the time. i never have to ask.#i dont know what happened. i dont know what changed from high school to now. i became a better person‚ i met better people? both.#i dont care how long it lasts or if its not this good forever. im just happy to be here. i finally feel worthy of this‚ without question#ive only known them for a few months but its the most secure ive ever felt.#maybe im oversharing!! i dont know!! i cant tell them outright ill overwhelm them!! its my blog and i can overshare if i want to!!#i dont know. im just grateful.#in other news i cleaned up my room a bit too‚ did lots of housework. always feels really cleansing.#after a stressful day yesterday this is what ive needed. a self care day. i have a lot of stuff to do but... it can wait while i rest lol#idk its just. so special to feel like i finally dont have to be the ''best'' or whatever to be loved. im loved as i am.#no arbitrary comparisons. its not conditional. i dont need to compete‚ i always feel like theres room. i hope we all thrive.
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I've connected the dots. The reason people write Mikey as innocent is because he's a positive, optimistic person and nine out of ten times that seems to be equated with not knowing how the world works instead of choosing to take the world with all its flaws and still be able to see the good in it
#saw someone complain that ppl write mikey as way too innocent and I def agree#and I was like I wonder /why/ though#and suddenly I was like wait. he's the positive optimistic one#it happens so often ppl seem to take that as naivité and innocence rather than.... simply being optimistic#it's not bc you have a positive outlook and try to be upbeat and see the good in ppl that you're naive or innocent#idk I think also that Rise Mikey especially tries to push back against this perception in show#his brothers don't explicitly think he's innocent but they do treat him as if he's smth to be protected and he wants to be seen as an adult#which makes the innocent characterization of him in the rise fandom more grating imo#but then again I haven't seen much of the other shows#but I think this goes for most if not all mikeys in general#tello talks#mikey tmnt
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