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theoi-crow · 3 years

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Hi there... Kind of shy about asking this so sorry if my question seems a bit all over the place. I kind of lost myself a few years back and stopped working with the goddess I was before. I've tried recently to slowly get back into my shadow work and loving myself again. Fortuna made herself known in ways I didn't expect. I think she wants to work with me but I don't think I should be working with anyone because what happened last time. How do you get over such self doubt and forgive yourself?

Hi!

please don’t worry about being shy and I apologize for taking so long to reply, my school is often very demanding of my time and my summer SADs make it hard to work in the summer. .

It is not uncommon for someone to lose a connection with gods.

I myself have experienced this on so many occasions, and it was even the reason why it took Aphrodite so long to convince me to start working with Greek Gods in the first place after I lost touch with a different pantheon.

Losing a connection with the gods is a lot more common than most followers will have you believe.

It teaches us about ourselves, our limits and the need for spiritual boundaries and clearer communication, not so much for the gods but for ourselves and how we approach the gods and expect the gods to communicate with us because everyone is different with different limits and needs.

According to the ancient Greeks, everything came from Chaos which birthed the first primordial gods: (LINK)

This is the reason why chaos tends to be a lot easier to reach, while order takes more effort.

This is also why intention is important when addressing the gods. Between the social noise of the media, personal expectations, social pressure, capitalism, surviving etc, it's easy for our thoughts to get muddled, so it's important for us to be clear about our plans with the gods so we create order within ourselves instead of letting life get a hold of us and lead us back to Chaos.

Setting spiritual boundaries can help you develop a clearer communication with the gods.

This applies to everyone but it is especially important for people who are disabled (physically, neurodivergent, a spoony with energetic limits, people that are prone to depression or anxiety which latch on to negative self talk and thus add confusion to life, etc.)

One of the main reasons why acknowledging and honoring your own limits and conditions when working with the gods is important is because not acknowledging them might affect how you view your relationship with the gods and might lead to feelings of guilt.

For example; I grew up catholic with undiagnosed ADHD and when I was going to church, I’d often get pinched whenever I got distracted.

As someone that finds it hard to focus, I assumed I was unfit to follow a god I couldn’t even focus on and the pinching I received for having ADHD incorrectly taught me that "my disability was bad and unfit for gods."

I didn't deconstruct my christian expectations, and accidently carried those same expectations with me when I started working with pagan gods and assumed I was never going to be able to work with pagan gods for the same reason.

It took me a while and a lot of self reflection to accept that paying attention to gods was going to be a lot more difficult for me, versus someone who was neurotypical.

One of my personal boundaries with the gods is asking them to patiently repeat something I forgot they said or gently guide me back to something I forgot to do.

The gods are a lot more patient than I'll ever be able to explain.

It's also possible that any guilt you experience could have potentially come from personal expectations that were not met. These kinds of expectations are common and have the potential to lead followers into developing imposter syndrome:

Imposter syndrome manipulates one into assuming they are not good enough to work with the gods, or have them wonder why the gods are bothering with them in the first place. Or have them worry that they might be bothering the gods.

It also encourages them to assume they are not doing enough to keep the gods happy and forces them to go beyond their limits.

Failure becomes inevitable and the devotee suffering from imposter syndrome comes to the conclusion that they are a terrible follower and shouldn't ever work with gods without ever realizing that they were going beyond their limits until they finally reach a breaking point.

Breaking points look different to different people but it often leads to a disconnection between the person and their gods.

The gods understand humans have limits and they also know the shadow self influences a lot of how we see them and how we expect ourselves to behave around them including the consequences we give ourselves for not abiding by that, or negative experiences from not having others respect our boundaries.

You are not a terrible follower because it's very common to fall out of relationships with gods, please don't let anyone guilt you into thinking this is a rare and personal problem.

May Fortuna help re-establish and enrich your relationship with the gods and help you find your voice within your own spiritual journey.

#fortuna #greek gods #helpol #hellenic polytheism 101 #imposter syndrome

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rockstar-angel · 3 years

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ballroom blitz

summary: rose reagan, a freelance assassin for hire, is hired to assassinate a man by the name of re.my le.beau. though, what she gets instead may grow to be more important.

shipping: rosemary (rose x remy)

warnings: slight violence and very brief/simple descriptions of injuries, knife usage, brief alcohol descriptions, cursing

word count: 3.7k

a/n: this is the first part in a little miniseries of edited roleplays between me and @embers-comfort-corner !!! this series will show the major plot points in rosemary’s development :] hope y’all enjoy!!!

tags: @sealovinq @tuff-and-fluff @soulnottainted (if you wanna be added/removed lmk!)

Wine, fabric, perfume, people talking and laughing; lots of different stimuli hit the assassin’s ears and nose. Galas were not her preferred place of work, but she would do what she needed if it meant she got paid. She had been hired by an anonymous buyer to assassinate a man by the name of Re.my Le.beau. She had been told that he was a former member of the known Thieves Guild, and a mutant, his mutation allowing him to light things like dynamite. The assassin let out a quiet sigh through her nose. Perfect. Just grand. (/s)

She had been stationed at the bar for a while now without catching sight of her target, and she was getting anxious for action. Tapping her glass impatiently, she scanned the room once again, ears perked bolt upright on her head. She let out a sigh as she lifted her glass to her lips before her ear flicked. Immediately glancing up, she caught a quick glimpse of the man that fit the description, before he disappeared into the crowd of people. Finally. She thought to herself, setting her glass down at the bar and thanking the barista before following in pursuit of her target.

It didn’t take her long before she’d found the man again, though she had been made slightly more uncomfortable in the process of having to push through the crowds of people. She gave a quick tap to his shoulder, putting on a faux smile as he turned around.

“Bonjour, monsieur. Est-ce que parler-tu l’anglais?” She began politely.

[hello, sir. do you speak english?]

Remy wasn't planning on sticking around this place. Yeah, it was fancy, and he loved feeling fancy, but he knew he didn't belong here. He just dropped by to swipe some jewelry here and there, maybe make some bets with people that he knew wouldn't win. He was walking to the next group of targets when he felt a tap on his shoulder.

He turned to face whoever it was, steeling himself for the inevitable yells of outrage from some old white man he scammed.

Instead, he was pleasantly surprised by a mutant with black cat-like ears and majestic white wings. Her brown hair framed her face and her voice was calm and inviting, something Remy hadn't encountered without being attacked later.

He smiled pleasantly and spoke, still taking in the beautiful figure in front of him.

"Why yes I do, mon ange."

He bent slightly, pressing a light kiss to the top of her hand before standing upright once more, a smirk plastered on his face.

She was bound to have some loot from the looks of that dress.

"Tell me, what's a lovely creature like you doin' inna place like dis?"

He spoke, words soft as velvet.

“Oh, thank god.” She breathed, faking a relieved look. “S’been a night full of French, I’m almost scared I’ll forget how to speak English.” She said with a calm smile.

“Rose. You are?” She introduced herself, discreetly looking the man over for any weapons. Nothing obvious, but the trenchcoat was suspicious.

"I've been there, half the time I mix up the words in both languages."

Remy said with a laugh.

“Name’s Gambit. Pleasure to meet ya, Rose.”

He said, putting extra emphasis on her name. She sure was pretty, but he knew better than to make any moves. For his sake, and hers.

"Can I offer you a drink?"

“Pleasure’s mine, chère.” Rose responded, closing her eyes briefly. When Gambit made the offer to buy her a drink, she gave a quick swat of her hand. “Only if you’ll allow me to buy you one in return.” She said, her expression unchanging. She had experience with poison and poisoned drinks; she wasn’t going to let her guard down that easily.

Remy laughed lightly and nodded, lightly grabbing Rose's hand and leading her through the crowd to the bar area. He sat down and ordered two glasses of something fruity and alcoholic, along with a water for her in case she wasn't in a drinking mood.

"So, ya never answered my question. What's a pretty thing like you doin’ in some old white guy party like dis?"

He said, voice low so the people around him wouldn't hear. His eyes had a playful gleam to them and his smile never ceased.

“People watching.” Rose sighed, giving another swat of her hand, her grin widening a bit as she played back the phrase ‘old white guy party’ in her mind. “Catfishing is a little hobby of mine.” She said, her tone joking but twinged with mischief. “Lure some guy into thinking I’m such a petite mignonne, then destroy him at darts or slapjack.” She continued, emphasizing her words by twining her fingers together and holding them under her chin, then leaning back a bit and setting her elbow on the bar. “Et tu?”

"Ooh, decieving looks typa' gal ey? I, myself, am a dealer of sorts. I deal de cards and make deals. I deal with troublemakers too. But I ain't someone you wanna stick with."

He said with a look that had an expression you couldn't quite place. He took a sip of his drink as soon as it came around, not letting Rose touch it, and keeping his hands visible. He had no intentions of poisoning anyone or being poisoned. He leaned his back against the table, looking out on the sea of people. It was almost sickening. Everyone so close together. He could never imagine being comfortable with that amount of physical touch, except possibly when fighting. He sighed and took another swig of his drink.

“Aw, c’mon.” Rose teased, giving Gambit a quick nudge before reaching for the glass of water. “The charismatic type, eh?” She said, raising an eyebrow as she took a sip. “Say, like Robin Hood? Eat the rich, empower the poor?” She said lightheartedly, setting down her glass and running her pinky finger around the rim of the glass.

"Somethin' like that."

He said with a small smile.

"Wh'bout you? Whaddyou do for work?"

He asked slyly, always keeping an eye on her hands in case she would reach for a concealed weapon.

He's learned not to trust anyone, something that would take a million years of therapy to undo. It wasn't his problem though, it kept him alive all these years.

“I work with animals! I bounce around from place to place, but mainly I deal with scaled buddies and cats.” She responded with a flick of her ear, scrunching her nose. She glanced back at him with a smile. “You seem like a cat person yourself.” She said, raising a shoulder and biting her lip jokingly. “No constant, though. You feed strays?” She asked, taking another sip from the glass of water. “Might as well just adopt if you’re going to play with strays.”

"Well, many people call me a snake, so maybe you'll get a kick outta me."

He said in a playful tone, scarlet eyes gleaming in the light.

"Your senses are good, yeah dere’s a lotta strays around. Dey don't feel like bein’ adopted though. Kinda like me. Driftin' from place to place, doin’ what dey please, now that's the life."

He said, sipping down the last of his drink and setting his glass down on the table behind him.

Rose nodded, lifting her glass briefly. “I’ll drink to that.” She said with a grin. “A snake, eh? Snakes are neat.” Rose said, setting her glass down, then setting her elbow on the bar, then her cheek on her fist. “I had a client once who called me in scared tears tellin’ me that there was a huge snake in her house stealing food from her pantry.” She said as she traced shapes on the surface of the bar with her free hand, glancing up at Gambit as she continued.

“I go to check it out, and I find a family of li’l garden snakes.” She shifted to use her fingers to measure about how long she recalled the snakes being. “Mama snake was no longer than that. After I got them situated elsewhere, outside the woman’s house of course, I looked at her and I said “ma’am, the few bits of food that those little snakes stole kept them alive,” and you wanna know what she said to me?” Rose paused, leaning back a bit and crossing her hands over her lap before continuing.

“She said “oh they shouldn’t have been here in the first place! My grandson died to a snake bite, I don’t want anything to do with them!”” Rose grumbled, imitating the woman’s voice, but in a more boomer-teasing way before she lifted her hands to the sides of her head innocently, making a confused face. “Turns out her grandson died of a rattlesnake bite. And y’know something else? She only paid me half of what I was supposed to get.” She sighed, putting a hand to her forehead as a smile tugged at the corners of her lips.

“People are so stupid. They see one bad thing involving a certain group happen, then suddenly they have zero empathy for said group.” She sighed, once again tracing the rim of her glass with her finger. “I’ll bet she was a cishet neurotypical human, too.” She added jokingly, in reference to the client she had just spoken about.

"You're a genuine hero, ain't'cha?"

He said, studying her with his eyes once again.

"People are stupid, I say who needs 'em! We're all better on our own!"

He said with a dry laugh. It sounded better in his head, when the words left his mouth they just sounded sad.

His expression didn't change though, hopefully Rose didn't notice the change in tone.

"People need'ta mind their business. Always askin' if he's this n she's that, how 'bout ya worry 'bout yerself! Didn't ya mama never teach ya manners?"

He said in direction of said people, shaking his head and laughing slightly.

He motioned for another drink and when he got it he turned to Rose.

"Say, all these folks got me feelin' claustrophobic, whaddya say we head out to the balcony over dere and have ourselves a more private chat. Less cishet neurotypical humans around."

He said with a gleam in his eye that you couldn't quite place.

Rose put a hand over her chest, letting out a sigh. “Please, I’d like that. S’getting hard to breathe in here.” She joked as she stood up, sliding a euro over the bar to the barista, quietly thanking her in French. She twined her gloved fingers together behind her back as she slowly started off towards the balcony.

Remy followed after her, watching her tail flick back and forth as she pushed through the crowd. She really was pretty from every angle, but he couldn't bother with stuff like that. Chances are she'd kill him as soon as they were alone together.

When they made it to the balcony, he took a swig of his drink, leaning against the railing and looking at the night sky, the stars reflective on his dark eyes.

"Didja know people can buy stars?"

He asked playfully.

"I think it's bullshit. Ya can't even go there, so how can you say you claim it? The stars belong to no one."

He said, taking another drink. He wasn't usually one to get all metaphorical but it felt right to say. A gut feeling.

Rose crossed her arms over the balcony, allowing her wings to stretch out a bit as she looked up at the sky. “Exactly. Technically we shouldn’t even call the earth ‘ours’, but when is anyone ever satisfied?” She sighed, pursing her lips. “Almost makes me wanna just, stop space exploration from happening.” She said with a small, sad smile. “Once NASA finds out about the existence of other life forms, they’re still gonna try to dominate over them regardless.” She continued, her tone becoming more sharp before she quickly changed the subject.

“You like astrology?”

"People are cruel."

He said, expression hardening in thought. He quickly shook himself from it and looked to her, grin back in place.

"It's interestin', although I never found myself gettin' into it. I'unno my sign but I can judge you based off yours."

He offered with a small chuckle. He drank the last of his drink and sighed. This was the first breather he had in a while. Shame he knew that it was gonna be spoiled eventually.

“Hmm...” Rose hummed, turning to look at Gambit and putting a finger to her chin. “You give me Sagittarius vibes, I’m not gonna lie.” She said, smiling before turning back to look at the sky. “I’m a Virgo. Do with that what you will, I’ve heard all of the stereotypes.” She sighed, shaking her head but still smiling slightly.

"A Virgo, ey? Well alright then, anxious-procrastinator-who-is-dreading-their-work-but-doesn't-wanna-start-it. In truth, I dunno much ‘bout the signs, just random things here ‘n dere that seem to change every second. Yer loyal though, and very caring. I can tell that much."

He said with a wink. His face flushed a little after. Why'd he do that. The alcohol had probably started getting to him by now.

Rose gasped dramatically, turning to look at Gambit again, her open mouth twitching into a smile. “Are you sure you’re not an astrologist? You just hit the nail on the head.” She said, stifling a laugh as she flicked his shoulder. “I’unno about loyal and caring though, but I’m doing my best.” She said a bit quieter, looking down and tucking a clump of her hair behind her ear.

"Ha! I wish! I'm sure you're great, and bein’ loyal to yourself is still loyal."

He said staring at the sky idley, glancing to her out of the corner of his eye.

That made Rose freeze up. She stared at Gambit with wide eyes for a few moments before glancing away bashfully. That almost made her feel bad for what she had to do. “Je doute que...” She mumbled, her voice just barely over a whisper.

[i doubt that…]

Gathering her strength—and mentally reminding herself of things to be angry about so she could use it against him—she took a breath and loosened her posture. “Apologies, monsieur Gambit, but I’m going to have to see you out.” She said, her voice wobbling the slightest bit before she dove at Gambit, tackling him over the side of the balcony; she hoped he didn’t notice her opening her wings to slightly lighten the impact when they hit the ground.

"Hmm—?"

Remy turned to look at Rose before suddenly being tackled off the balcony.

Her claws dug into his throat and her expression was suddenly seething with hatred. He braced for impact and cried in pain when they landed. He knew it was coming, luckily he kept his glass in hand.

He charged it with kinetic energy and smashed it against her head, causing her to let go. It shattered on impact, leaving lots of explosive little glass shards everywhere. He scrambled out from under her as they blew up.

"Sorry! You did it first!"

He called back before ducking behind a potted plant like an idiot.

Rose shrieked when Gambit smashed the glass over her head, causing her to stumble back a few steps before she shook the fuzziness from her head, manifesting and drawing her bow. “You don’t have much of a choice when you’re an assassin.” She retorted, her tone sharp as she released the drawstring, the arrow shattering the pot. She manifested two more arrows, docking them as she flew into the air, quickly firing them in the two directions Gambit could try to move.

"Wh- ah, shit-"

He stuttered before jumping up above the arrows so they collided with one another.

"Who’s after my ass dis time? Magneto? Mystique? If it’s Creed though, tell ‘im he’s a pussy for not killin’ me himself!"

He shouted as he dodged and drew his deck, lighting them with bright pink plasma. He then flung them at Rose, careful not to aim for anything vital. Something about her made him want to get to know her more. He couldn't place it, but he tried to block it out of his mind so he would at least survive their encounter.

Rose folded her wings upon seeing Gambit’s counterattack, dropping back down to the ground. “I can’t tell you that.” She said, her voice eerily calm as she stood up again and drew back a different type of arrow. This time she aimed at the wall next to where Gambit was standing, the arrow splitting open into multiple smaller arrows on impact. As the smaller arrows bounced off of the walls, Rose flew back into the air.

Remy muttered cusswords under his breath and drew his baton. He spun erratically to deflect the arrows away from him, failing a few times but not being hit in any place compromising, just a few scratches here and there. When the arrows had all fallen to the floor and disappeared, he flung a handful of cards in Rose’s general direction, ducking down and covering his head. The nice thing about explosives is you don’t have to have perfect aim.

Rose growled a few curses of her own, doing her best to evade the charged cards, except for one. It made contact with her right wing, the assassin letting out a shriek in pain as she spiraled to the ground, somewhat catching herself but still making a rough landing. She tried raising her wing, immediately stopping and folding it against her back when it sent a pang of pain down her spine. Whipping back to face Gambit, her sharp gaze glistened in the moonlight, her expression upset but not quite readable. “I’ll be honest with you, asshole, I was starting to like you.” She hissed, docking three arrows this time; she was sure her opponent wouldn’t believe her, seeing as how he apparently hadn’t trusted her from the start. That’s what she hoped, at least.

“You should put some ice on that.”

He said with genuine concern, dodging the arrows again. He ran around a bit, throwing cards around him randomly to distract from where he was going to move next before landing on her bow, pressing it to the ground before she could shoot him. He kneeled down to face her.

"Sorry mon ange, yer grounded." He said with an almost sad smile. "And if we're bein' honest, I enjoyed myself too."

Rose scowled at him, taking her hands off of her bow so Gambit fell downwards slightly. Before he had a chance to do anything else, she lifted and swung her leg at his head, throwing him into the wall. She then lifted her dress up slightly, revealing a hidden knife holster. She grabbed it and twirled it between her fingers so it was facing Gambit as she held it to his throat, her breathing starting to become labored.

“What was that about ‘being loyal’?” She sneered sharply, but something else was hidden behind her slitted eyes.

Remy stopped in place, arms raised to show he wasn't gonna try anything. In his head he was trying to think of a plan, leading to a heavy silence between the two. They both breathed heavily, watching each other for a second before he spoke again.

"Uh, d’you gamble?" He asked with a nervous and playful smile.

The question took her by surprise. “...what?” Her stance faltered for a split second before she resumed holding the blade to his throat. “No. What are you trying to do?” She growled, her gaze darting from his hands to his face distrustfully.

"I'd just like to make a bet is all! Don't even gotta bet for money!" He said with a playful look despite being held at blade-point. "I bet that we're gonna meet again sometime." He offered with a grin, knowing she had every intention to kill him.

“What, in hell? That’s cute.” Rose scowled, holding the blade closer to his throat but not pressing hard enough to draw blood. Yet. “The only reason you’re still alive is because I find you mildly amusing.” She hissed, her gaze now locked with his.

"Oh c'mon, you love me." He said jokingly with a wink for emphasis, before suddenly grabbing her hand and twisting it behind her back, covering her working wing so she couldn't move.

"Stay still for me, would'ja?" He grabbed a card with his free hand and set it on her back, grabbing a pen and scribbling something on it. Once he finished, he put away the pen and took the dagger from her hand, leaning on her back a bit longer.

"Y'know, I think this is de most fun I've had in a while."

All Rose could do was widen her eyes as her opponent maneuvered her into a position where she couldn’t think of anything to do. Fuck, how did this happen. “What the fuck are you doing?” She demanded, squirming and jerking her arms and upper body, trying to throw Gambit off. She sighed, puffing a few strands of hair out of her face as she did so. “What makes you think I’ll believe that? I’m not inclined to believe anything that you’ve said to me in the past hour.” She grumbled, hoping to distract him.

"Well, you probably won't. I can't change ya." He admitted with a shrug. He used his power on the blade and tossed it at a wall behind him. Once it exploded he let the card he had written on flutter down onto the ground in front of her face.

"Keep in touch, mon ange."

He released her and ran off into the smoke, making sure he wasn't being followed. Once he got away, he sighed wistfully. He kinda wished he got her number but all he could do was hope she'd call.

Growling defensively and whipping around as soon as she could move her arms again, all Rose saw was the card on the ground. She glanced about her surroundings, snarling when she realized that her target had gotten away. This was the first time she had failed. As her gaze dropped to the ground, she remembered the card. She bent to pick it up, flipping it over, her face heating up upon reading what Gambit had written. Fucking hell. What had she gotten herself into.

#art.exe #self ship #self ship community #self shipping #self ship writing #[ r.selfship — rosemary ]

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essekknits · 5 years

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A few tips for a tutor (or a student)

Now, I’m a tutor. I never studied it, I’m a high school graduate who was looking to earn some money to pay for driving lessons so their parents wouldn’t have to. But somehow I apparently got better results than any adult that taught those kids before. So here’s what I learned.

People know the things that make them comfortable in learning. They know them better than me. On my first lesson with any student, I make it very clear that this is not school, and if there’s anything that makes them feel more focused, be it music, or playing with their pencils, or drumming on the table or anything at all, they can do it. So one of my students always fidgets with her pencil. Another student I had would mix cards. One had the tv on as background noise.

Learn different ways to do the same thing. Not every method of teaching works for every student, and sometimes I had to go through five different ways of explaining the same assignment before my student got the idea. That’s okay and natural. Everyone’s brains work differently.

Learn not just how to do something, but why. Especially important if you teach maths. Teachers don’t actually teach what Pi means until high school, and sometimes not even then, when you use Pi since 6th grade. For most of my students, learning what Pi actually meant made it a lot easier to study circles and learn the formulas related to them. So many other formulas too. When you teach your students the “Why”, it can help them make sense out of the “How”. It doesn’t always work, but in many cases it does so it’s worth it.

If there’s a difficulty somewhere, try playing with outside factors. The problem might be somewhere different than you think. In the year I’ve been doing this, I met kids that told me “I hate reading, I can’t do it” (I teach most of my students English as a second language, so it’s usually English where I encounter it, but I got it in Hebrew too). But the simple act of moving the text to Word, dividing it to smaller paragraphs and changing the font to something more comfortable to read (you’d be surprised how nice Comic Sans can be to read), made a huge difference. She’s thriving. No, it didn’t solve all the problems. She still has a very small vocabulary, but all of a sudden she can read. She doesn’t mix the letters as much as she did. She doesn’t skip lines or struggle with words she knows as much as she used to.

Divide the studying time. I work on full hour basis, and some of my students take an hour and a half, or two hours. Divide studying times.If you have multiple subjects, divide your lesson into different parts. If you have only one subject, allow short breaks. I let my students complain about their school experience. I share some of mine with them. I let them tell me about their day or week while we’re working, or when we take a break. Maybe this works just because I’m closer to their age, but I seriously doubt that, because I used to do the same with my seventy years old piano teacher.

Shorten the studying time if you need. Leave something in the end that your student actually likes as a reward. Like, we studied boring maths for a whole hour? Let’s finish with thirty minutes of talking about black holes, cause holy shit they’re cool. The subjects are endless. In those end segments, I already discussed god and biblical stories, Greek myths, black holes, hemophilia and how Queen Victoria almost killed all of Europe’s monarchies, axolotls, water bears, and platypuses (she didn’t know they were a real thing. She thought they’re something Phineas and Ferb invented). This Sunday I’m planning a short lesson about the immune system and vaccines (we didn’t get to do them in a while because of tests).

Music is the best way to learn a language. When I teach 6th graders English, I let them analyse Beatles songs. That way they enjoy music while also learning vocabulary and grammar. Disclaimer on this one: Queen songs are NOT good for this. They’re for older students to learn English. Not for 6th graders.

Can’t believe I have to say that, but don’t talk over your students. Be on their level. Kids learn a lot better when you are their equal instead of an authority figure. Humanise yourself. Tell them about a failure you had in the subject you’re studying, cause they’re most likely failing the subject now and are terrified that you’ll judge them.

While we’re at it, establish that you’re never going to judge them for failing, not understanding or asking questions. You’ll need to remind them every lesson that if there’s anything they don’t understand they need to stop you and ask, and you’ll never judge them. No matter how stupid they think their question is, no matter how many times they asked it, it’s okay and you’ll be happy to explain it again.

Don’t let your students say “I can’t do it”. A kid that says “I can’t do it”, or “I’m just not good at it”, is a student who is giving up. Change that way of thinking. Turn “I’m not good at it” into “we didn’t find the right way to do it yet”. When they say “I can’t do it”, point at a similar assignment that they already completed, and say “I don’t know about you, but this makes me think you can definitely do it”. Let them know you believe in their abilities. Challenge them to think that they can do it.

While answering an assignment, ask the student to tell you everything that comes to their mind. No matter how stupid they think it is, ask them to tell you their first thought. I learned that often those first thoughts, and the entire thought process, are really close to what needs to be done. They just need to look at it differently.

Sometimes, you won’t be able to teach. Accept that. In some lessons, your student will be unfocused, or bothered by something else, or distressed after something happened in their life. Maybe they had a fight with their siblings, maybe they have a relative who isn’t doing so well, maybe they had drama in their friend group. It happens. It’s out of your control. Try your best to help them focus, but accept that maybe you won’t succeed. Accept that maybe they’ll need to just vent it all, or they won’t be cooperative, or they’ll take their anger and frustration out on you (especially relevant in younger students). It happens. Don’t let them take their anger out on you, but don’t get angry back. Be kind and patient. Even if you didn’t manage to teach anything that lesson, you might be able to help a little, and that matters just as much if not more.

For the love of everything that is good, back your student up in front of their parents! If the parent belittle’s the child’s achievements while the three of you are together, tell them that you think they’re making a great effort and improving very well. If it was a hard lesson, and you didn’t manage to learn a lot, say you decided to give them a break in studying in order to learn to understand them better, so the next lessons would be more beneficial to all of you. Don’t get me wrong, if the kid doesn’t make an effort it’s a whole other story, and you should make the parents aware that there is a problem (still, without pointing fingers and shaming your student, and with as much subtlety and gentleness possible). But back your student up in front of their parents. Let them feel that if their parents are pressuring them too much, they have some form of authority that says “yes, things aren’t as good as we’d like them to be, but your efforts and improvements are recognised and appreciated”. If possible, help the parent acknowledge and recognise the improvement and effort.

Dont assume that your student is neurotypical!!! Please, don’t assume that your student is neurotypical, because if you do, you won’t be able to recognise the signs that they might not be. And if you don’t recognise the signs, you won’t know to help them. Many kids who need tutoring are ND. I suspect the majority of my students are ND. If I didn’t look for the signs I know (being ND myself and learning in a class full of other ND people), I wouldn’t have been able to help them study the way I did. According to their parents, I managed to help them in a way no other tutor ever did. One of my students’ grades in English jumped from 60 to 100 after two lessons, just two, because I knew how to approach the problems differently, in a way that would help and make sense for her.

All these advice are phrased as advice to a tutor teaching other students, but honestly? These would’ve probably helped me as a student as well. Treat yourself the way you would treat a student you are teaching. Learn what works for you. Listen to yourself. Be kind to yourself. I know studying is hard, and school can be hell sometimes, but you can get through.

#studying #tutoring #studying tips #tutoring tips

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laryna6 · 7 years

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Things I imagine post-series in the Koori no Mamono no Monogatari ‘verse -

People going to Seek The Blessings Of The God Of Water carrying bags of ‘Lake Dragon Food’ for his adorable sort-of-aquatic-iguanas?-children. In the cities near/on the lake, taking your children somewhere the reptiles play and having the child throw out lots of ~fish food is known to be a sovereign charm against drowning - kind of necessary because small children are magnetically attracted to water and they have a lot of bridges and canals.

Human children being taught to swim in places the god’s children are swimming and ending up playing together - or How Seethe Winds Up Also God of Babysitting.

A lot of other aquatic demons (like the well demon) are told to go to that region or just captured and released in Seethe’s territory (this is pretty safe because demons especially weak ones like that usually obey the strong and Seethe is ‘no eating the humans or my babies will cry’) where they can feed on all the offerings instead of eating people, and Seethe is okay with this because there are too many offerings and otherwise his children are going to overeat and get tummyaches.

People from far-off lands beset with droughts come to petition for the god’s help and their offerings introduce things like beach balls and floaty wings to the region. Also development of flippers/general scuba gear.

The children end up developing a sign language? Since the human children can’t use telepathy and hand signals are sensible underwater. So their region becomes the center of deaf culture. (LGBT culture = Toei - since that area was fairly empty of humans, when humans do move in it’s just taken for granted that Blood and Ishuca are the rulers.)

With all the food, a lot of Seethe’s children become more powerful as they get older and become able to transform enough to look like humans? Although Dad doesn’t like them getting rid of their cute scales so they don’t transform enough to pass for human in front of him.

The temple orphanage - which does seem to do a good job - starts also taking in demon children, although of course all the ones found in the North already go to the Leader and such and such~

Since King Claus’ ghost is still hanging around being heroic, his people adore him and the ‘what actually happened’ version of the Rapunzel story (as opposed to the Fix Fic version) ends up getting printed and circulating and people sigh over how noble their country’s hero was.

Ishuca decides his grandmother and the lake demon would like it if more people called their names, so the Summon spell gets passed around and given especially to orphans in a ‘what do you say if the scary person grabs you?’ capacity. Oba-san is very pleased by all the cute.

Once demons aren’t so much considered evil, the immortality spell becomes something more commonly used, and since there isn’t the association that ‘this = demon = evil,’ it turns out that the majority of humans who have it used on them don’t turn into demons.

Becuase of the immortality spell and his involvement in the heroic stuff, kids/teens with magical power start going to Wild to beg him to teach them. Rapunzel just smiles/sparkles, and Wild ends up founding a school so that it can become an institution and the school can teach the kids so he gets some actual alone time with his husband, and since Rapunzel was the ~dean of students and person coming up with ways for people to little or no magic to cast spells, he got to be in charge of setting that up. So yeah, basically the entire medical/magical profession ends up calling Wild Lord Mage.

And this ends up with a situation where basically the entire medical/magical profession’s reaction to anti-LGBT comments is ‘say what about Mr. Rapunzel?’

Immortality option leads to people having fewer kids - and given the role of orphans in their ~mythology, a lot of people end up adopting from outside the area instead of having children themselves. Like, their missionaries probably bring back a ton of demons that aren’t wanted/didn’t have loving families where they were from. Given the Children In Need thing and the fact that since their region has more demons and magic users among the civilians than anywhere else, kids who grew up with demons, have like a hundred years of life experience and can shield against tantrums are best to deal with beings who have internalized that they are evil.

Like... You do not want to go to war with these people. You just don’t.

It sometimes becomes a problem because people who grew up here think of ‘demons = evil’ as racist stuff from the bad old days/go ‘oh poor baby was forced into the life of eating people because Society failed to teach them right’ in other countries that haven’t had their resources and centuries-old demons are actually being Evil. So while the adoption agency priests/people and the people who go out to talk to the demons are considered great by most countries because they’re competent and trained, the civilians’ attitude is often... not appreciated by other countries, until those countries have been in travel range for long enough that their wild demons are all adopted/in prison and have been for long enough that the assumption when a demon attacks someone is that it’s too young/dumb to know better and someone will be along to deal with it.

Knowledge of barriers/magic and having the kids protected by Summon Grandparents helps, too.

Then there’s how demonic contracts can be useful, although they get strictly regulated because of how easily they can be abused too. Frequency of use actually goes down a ton once demons grasp the whole rule of law thing, which is much safer. Especially if your constitutional monarchs (Ishuca laying a foundation for a national congress with the Serious Business of Blood’s hair length!) are Heroes.

Ishuca and Blood are going to end up the romantic ideal for a lot of people, which is good, to have a template for what constitutes LOVE that can clearly be seen to involve partnership, being honest with each other, evident physical attraction and teasing but still respect...

But I’m also like. The sea has got t be somewhere a lot of lake people want to see? When people in the rest of the world were scared of demons, Seethe probably wanted his kids to like have a human along in case the humans made trouble? So like human and demon childhood friends and like beating up massive seat/etc. monsters and bringing them home to Seethe (if scaled) and the Temple if not.

Also a lot of The Power of Love focus, with the big Redemption story being parental love actually... Or like the demons were kind of screwed w/o parents/parental love (protection and food so they didn’t have to be brutal to survive) etc., so a lot of stories, a bunch of them real/based on real with the power of parental love feeding the society’s view on the importance of adoption?

...eventually leading to a lot of blurring of generations when your big sis is 300 years older than you, and of course blended families and a world that’s a lot better for human neurotypes because they had to deal with/accept how demon instincts are not human instincts/not everyone is wired the same.

#koori cannons

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open-letters-on-mental-illness · 7 years

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To Allistics from Autistics (Warning: Profanity.)

Please. Do. NOT. Say. That. We. Have. No. Right. To. See. A. Fictional. Character. As. Autistic. Just. Because. It. Isn’t. Stated. That. They. Are. Autistic.

And don’t you fucking say that they are your characters or that it’s your show/movie/story/game so we can’t see even have a small notion that a fictional character might be autistic.

I’m gonna be honest; if you do that, you are acting like the scummiest of the scummiest scum in the history of the universe. You know why? Because you’re taking away one of the few privileges we have as autistics.

You have this thing called allistic privilege ™. You got that shit for no fucking cost. Your allistic privilege ™ package includes:

-No risk of social isolation because you have no fucking clue on how social skills work. -No risk of being patronized or taken advantage of or manipulated because the signs go right over your goddamn head until it’s too late (autistics often have trouble reading subtle signs like that). -No risk of being put under extended guardianship. -No risk of being threatened to be institutionalized or even being institutionalized because people think you’re stupid and can’t take care of yourself. -No risk of social skills class making you afraid to make friends because they teach the same fucking basic-ass things. -No risk of feeling like/being told that you’re a burden because you're autistic. -No risk of people thinking that they know what’s best for you and trying to control every. Single. Aspect. Of your motherfucking life. -No risk of having to go through ABA therapy, which can be incredibly abusive. -No risk of being so overstimulated that you shut the fuck down and can’t talk to anyone for the rest of the fucking day. -No risk of being seen as a nuisance because sometimes stims are verbal. -No risk of anyone talking to you like you’re a child because people think being autistic means you're stupid. -No risk of being told that you’re just faking your autism. -No risk of people trying to speak for you even if you're verbal and autistic. -No risk of people considering you subhuman simply because of your neurological disorder. -No risk of being told that your autism makes you broken and you need to be fixed. -No risk of people trying to keep you from being vaccinated because some people still believe vaccines cause autism for some fucking reason. -No risk of being told that the reason you act the way you do is because autism is caused by the devil (I'm not kidding. I found an article about how autistics are possessed by demons. Like fucking why?) -No risk of being told "You're not autistic. You're a person with autism." Like no shit, Sherlock. They're the same damn thing. I'll say it how I prefer to say it. -No risk of all of the stigma surrounding autism making you wish you were neurotypical or even worse making you wish you were dead (I found a tumblr post in which a user said that their ten year old autistic brother, who people hate for some reason, has told them he wishes to die because of how hated he feels. Ten. Fucking. Years. Old.). -You don't risk not being able to go to college because you're not "developmentally disabled." -You don't risk social skills classes making you feel like a freak and that everyone else just knows all this social shit right away. -You're not as likely to be the target of bullying in school. (I didn't say you are never gonna be the target of bullying, because other factors play into it, but the two main ones are that people are insecure and they're dickheads, but because your thinking is mostly on the same wavelength as the general population, the odds of you being bullied are lower than if you were autistic.) -Because your odds of being bullied due to how you think are lower, you don't risk being bullied into depression and anxiety because of it. In fact studies have shown that depression, anxiety, and suicidal ideation are alarmingly common in autistic teens and adults. -No one has written online that if they get 50 likes, they're gonna set a neurotypical kid on fire. (I found this out while doing research for a satire article I wrote). -You don’t have a company, who has no one on the spectrum on their board, trying to stigmatize you and saying that they speak for you. (I think you all fucking know what goddamn organization I mean.)

And that’s just the start of it.

I’m 18 goddamn years old, but I’m under extended guardianship until next summer, and my parents still support Autism Speaks, even though I’ve tried to tell them how bad they actually are.

Let me say this again:

We. Are. Not. A. Goddamn. Puzzle.

We. Do. Not. Need. To. Be. Fixed.

We. Do. Not. Have. A. Disease.

We. Do. Not. Need. To. Be. Cured.

Yes, there are autistic people who are severely disabled. But they do not need to be fixed. They need to be accepted and loved just like, oh I don’t know, ANY OTHER GODDAMN MOTHERFUCKING PERSON ON THE MOTHERFUCKING PLANET.

“But they cost a lot to take care of.”

Too bad. Severely autistic people are people too. If you don’t want to risk having an autistic child, then just don’t have kids. If you have kids, there is a chance they will be autistic, whether mildly or severely. If you do not want to have an autistic kid, then don’t. Have. Children.

“But they’re inherently inferior than allistic, or even, mildly autistic people.”

You do realize you could just say that you’re a heavily-prejudiced dickhead who doesn’t have enough brain power or room in your heart, which may or may not exist (cuz honest to God, if you hate everything, logically, you wouldn’t be able to be alive.), to accept that people are people, no matter their fucking race, religion, disability, etc, etc,.

Cuz those two statements mean the exact same thing.

“But they’re expensive to care for.”

See the point of inherent inferiority and shove your hatred up your ass.

I’m normally a very nice person and I try to avoid confrontation and exploding in anger as much as possible, but things like this make me want to bang my motherfucking head on the wall.

Do. Not. Take. One. Of. The. Only. Privileges. We. Have. As. Autistic. People.

Okay. I’m worn down, not just from this but just from life in general as well. I have a test and audition today and I can’t be worn down anymore.

#autistic character of the day #actuallyautistic

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