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cheesewithasideofcheese · 1 year

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From the Beginning

Sindri x gn!reader pt1

Ask: I have an idea with our love Sindri, maybe the reader is a daughter/relative of kratos. I just love family drama, something with to much fluff

RAAAAAH I GOT ALL A’S AND B’S ON MY MIDTERMS AAAHHHHH

The reader is implied to be in their middle twenties and tall, Brok is himself, Sindri is anxious all the time, some angst in the at the end, and mentions of cheating. Probably a lot of misspellings and grammar errors, can’t ‘English isn’t my first language’ my way out of this either.

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Being the child of Kratos and Faye wasn’t easy and particularly lonely, especially after your mothers death.

Your father became colder and harsher, never showing any emotion rather than disappointment and rage. This took a large toll on you and your brother, becoming so emotionally constipated it was clinical.

But it wasn’t all bad. The people you met along your adventures were the highlight of all of them… probably because it was the most ‘friendly’ you’ve been with someone in months that wasn’t your brother.

So it was a breathe of fresh air when you encountered Sindri on the dock with your father and brother. Even though y’all’s first interaction was particularly tense because of his history with leviathan but he soon became a constant in your life.

Shortly after encountering him you met his brother, Brok. They were so different you thought it was a joke at first, I mean it’s reasonable since one of them is blue but who cares it was the least of the weirdest thing you’ve encountered.

After reuniting them, which was a larger hurdle than you expected because you couldn’t imagine hating your sibling so. In hindsight, your thinking was pretty ironic cause you almost disowned Atreus when he sneaks off to Asgard in the following years.

When they reunite their relationship and their company you visit them frequently because you had a bad habit of breaking your axe, to your fathers dismay.

The weird thing was that Sindri was never around when you would visit them, even if you thought you saw a glimpse of him. His small work shops just always seem to be empty and Brok would appear a few minutes later looking rather disgruntled. You’ve only been able to catch what he mumbles to himself and it’s always how someone’s being a little bitch. You always assumed it was an asshole customer that had the same habit of breaking things.

The same thing would happen when you’d catch Atreus or your father with Sindri except he always had an excuse on him but most were rather questionable, ranging from “you know how busy it is being a renowned smithing company and all” to “uh… I’ve gotta go walk Brok… you know how he is”.

A couple times you’ve asked your brother what his problem was but all he’d say is that Sindri would kill him if he said anything

That made you nervous cause what the Hel does that even imply. You’d rack your brain and harass Brok but he was quiet too, which scared you even more.

So you made a plan to make Atreus rough up his bow a little and make Sindri fix it and while he’s distracted youd corner him and ask him what his deal was.

With constant complaining from Atreus how your plan is practically see through with how many holes there are and that he didn’t want to put his bow in the mix, he eventually gave in and hit it up against a tree a couple tries but that didn’t do jack shit so you just cut the string. Your father thought you were bullying him for a couple seconds until you both gave each other a nod after examining the damages.

So you two hiked all the way up the mountain to his nearest workshop and you stayed behind some yards behind a rock while Atreus went up to the kiln. Sindri popped up secound a later with his cheery attitude until he saw the bow. Sindri shot the boy a annoyed look before searching for a new string. All the while chatting away.

While his back was turned Atreus waved his hand towards himself telling you to come closer but when you were about to come right behind the dwarf he ushered you away and pointed to the nearest tree. Confused you did it anyways. Why would he do that you had the clearest opening?

As you hid behind for another minute or so you were about to give up until they started a new topic.

“How did you even damage your bow so bad? Whatever it was must have been as sturdy as a tree.”

Sindri said. Atreus looked like was going to explode with anxiety while you hid behind a tree trying not to laugh out loud.

“Just training with [reader]. Their axe snagged it.”

With the mention of your name Sindris head shot up but what you didn’t expect was the dopey smile on his face.

“They did did they? How are they doing anyways?”

“How about you ask them yourself for once?”

Atreus pouted at the man who looked aback and petrified.

“Are you crazy?? I’ll embarrass myself like when I showed them my home in between the realms! You remember what Brok said to them!”

The memory made you chuckle. You had visited with your family to their house and when you asked Brok how they made one of the swords on the wall he told the story of how Sindri thought he could take on the monster that was protecting the material that they needed to craft it and got his ass handed to him so bad he hid in his bedroom for a week in embarrassment. You remember how Sindri had thrown a piece of medal at him and had the cutest blush while he stared at him in shock.

“Well it will be just as embarrassing when you actually talk to them because it will creep them out about how you know everything about them?!”

“Give me a week-“

“YOU SAID THAT LAST YEAR BUT LOOK WHERE WE ARE! YOU KNOW WHAT THEY HAVE BEEN BEHIND THAT TREE THIS WHOLE TIME BECAUSE THEY WANTED TO CONFRONT YOU FOR WHY YOU HATE THEM SO MUCH AND IM SICK OF YOU ONLY TALKING ABOUT THEM WHEN WE HANG OUT!”

Everything went silent as Atreus finished his rant. His hand that pointed to the tree you hid behind stayed up until you walked out. You gave Sindri a little wave and that awkward smile that he loved. Sindri looked like he was pure shock as he whipped his head between you and Atreus.

“w..wh…. WHAT!”

Before you knew it the dwarf had passed out on the ground and the two of you rushed to him.

“ATREUS!”

“What?! This was your plan!”

“This was not my plan?! I didn’t intend for you to have that outburst and I surly didn’t intend for him to pass out!”

“He would have passed out anyways!”

You let put a frustrated groan as you hoisted the dwarf onto your back. It was like carrying a couple grapes but you dreaded the confrontation you and the man will have once you get him someplace warm.

You stopped at a near by abandoned cottage because you wanted to avoid going back home and explaining why his best blacksmith had passed out.

As you started a fire you told Atreus to go back to the house because you didn’t want him to have to watch the awkward confrontation you were going to have. Atreus thanked you and left without a word.

Sindri woke up a few minutes later not seeming to notice you as he shoved his head into his hands and groaned in frustration. He couldn’t believe he embarrassed himself AGAIN. He swung his feet around the bed you placed him in and was meet with your siting form staring at him like how a wolf stares at its prey when they’ve known they won. In these moments he truly sees your father in you, from your towering for to your sharp eyes. In spite of that he sees your mothers caring personality when you weren’t ripping someone’s head from their shoulders. What surprised him the most when he met you and what caused him to fall was the goofy lightheartedness you brought everywhere. To him your side mission was making everyone in a room smile.

“Don’t you dare feint again. We have to talk.”

He felt himself sweat and his mouth dry up. He froze up, not a single word left his mouth. This angered you as he seemed to love talking about you from what you heard from Atreus a while ago.

“You know I don’t like getting made fun of.”

This confused him I mean didn’t you just hear him and Atreus blab about you some time ago. His confused face made you stand up and bring him with you… by his collar. His feet dangled a couple feet from the ground. Alarm and fear spread across his face but he still said nothing.

“You know I don’t like my feeling played with.”

It finally dawned on him. You had thought him and Atreus were pulling a prank on you. He knew that this must have to hurt to think because he remembered how around a year and a half ago you had entered a relationship with someone from a village you had frequented. It was the reason he stopped talking to you, it hurt him too much to watch you be happy with someone else. It hurt him even more when you found out they had cheated on you with another close friend of yours in the same village. He watched as you cried to your brother about it and how Atreus didn’t know how to handle your emotions. So he took it upon himself to tell Atreus what to do and what to say that would comfort you best. He knew you wouldn’t want to see him after a couple months of no show from him and how your father would just grumble to you about harnessing your sadness into rage or whatever awful advice he gave about emotions.

“no no no No NO! I swear it’s not like that!”

“THEN WHATS IT LIKE!”

“I LOVE YOU.”

There goes the awful silence again. You dropped him with embarrassment and confusion on your face. He grabbed your hands which caused you to jump, you know how he is about germs so you were about to question him until he said.

“I really do and don’t think anything else. I have since I first fixed up your axe and how hard it was because you kept making me laugh. AND I know you probably do t feel the same so I’ll just leave and you will only have to talk to Brok if it’s too awkward for yo-“

He was lifted up again and when he expect death he was met with your chest and a warm presence on his hair line. He could only dream of this situation, being in your arms infront of a firplace with no one in sight.

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I really like this one and it took me forever.

Tag list: @alondrashultz , @simpforjesus , @novidiadarkmagic , @resident-sindri-fucker (honestly I just put people who I think would like this lol)

#gow x reader #gow #sindri x reader #sindri

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sleepless-in-starbucks · 3 years

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Hi could you talk more about why youd recommend not watching ww84?

Sure!

warnings for under the cut: spoilers for WW84 and a bit of the first wonder woman; i only saw WW84 once a few days ago + it’s been a hot sec since i saw the original so if i get a few details wrong i apologize

tl;dr with no spoilers: WW84 is a poorly executed movie that insults its viewer with its messy and self-proud plot, bad character/relationship portrayals, and offers a personal slap in the face to a majority of its audience in their various discriminations, generalizations, and plot points.

the first point is the racism, made well by the post i reblogged here, (edit: found a second post that goes more in depth here) so i’d just suggest looking at that for that matter

next is just How they portray wonder woman in this one

i really appreciated the way the first movie portrayed diana because they did very well in keeping true to her Amazonian raising and life while still clearly showing she was a woman

when i say this i mean that a lot of media has a tendency to either make women who are very fem and keep to traditional gender roles or women who more or less shun femininity and attempt to largely fulfill only male gender roles

diana in the original is a warrior, strong and fierce, but still a woman, not trying to shun that or anything. she wears styles that suit her while still being woman’s styles (she doesn’t force her way into a suit), she talks of and addresses her womanhood proudly and without issue, etc

i want to note here i have no issue with female characters who act extremely masc and reject femininity- i love them tbh- but it’s important to remember that it’s not inherently against womanhood or anything to be a strong fighter who doesn’t stick to every stereotypical social gender norm

and the first wonder woman movie shows this very well

WW84... oh boy

first of all, wonder woman’s changing outfits every other scene. even between scenes where it makes no sense! i’m not saying she can only wear one set of clothes but Geez this was too much

not to mention an entire scene dedicated to her helping steve pick a fashion look? i understand this was to highlight the ‘80-ness of the movie, and it would’ve been fine if it seemed diana was helping him pick a period appropriate look, but it was clear she was trying to help him pick a ‘fashionable’ look which. wonder woman? from the island without a sense of popular outfits or fashion? what?

and the amount of focus on her wearing high heels.... ugh

i’m not saying you can’t have a badass woman who also likes social gender norm fem things but it felt clear that wasn’t what they were going for

wonder woman in the first movie liked practical fashion and not only were many of her outfits not that, her high heels? one hundred percent not practical

it didn’t fit her character and felt horribly out of place, clearly just the producers / directors / whoever going ‘oh, wonder woman is a woman how can we show this? fashion! high heels!’ and i hated it

(warning: imma be jumping from thought to thought as they bump into each so uh... enjoy the train-of-thought style of flaw informing)

and starting at the beginning like.... wow that scene had no purpose

wonder woman cheats in a competition and is punished for this by losing it in the end. except. this is stupid for two reasons

as the audience is shown she didn’t cheat on purpose. she made a mistake, lost her horse, and made a strategy to get back into the race despite this. honestly? i thought the story was going to be a lesson in ingenuity in the worst looking situations. but it wasn’t, which is bad storytelling, because the lesson is then based on a point that isn’t even that true

it is literally Never important again later. unless you count what was going on with the wishstone as ‘cheating to victory’ which i dont. that’s not even what the villain did. he wanted to take over the world. there’s no victory there you get without cheating. wtf. why did that message even happen

going into the actual story we meet the cheetah pretty quick, when she’s still whatever-her-civilian-name-is

and the cheetah... she’s such a bad villain

she doesn’t have the same backstory as she does in the comics

in this one, she uses the wishstone- which is a whole ‘nother thing in and of itself- to wish to be like diana, because ig being smart as hell but social awkward as hell too is so bad you need to desperately wish to be someone else? i hate that trope, but onwards-

she gets that, but in exchange for not only diana’s likable personality she also gets her wonder woman powers (and she loses her glasses, because pretty and cool means no glasses, right? /s), she loses her kindness bc of the rules of the wishstone- in exchange for your wish, it takes smth u care about a lot from you; for her, it was her kindness

this makes her villain! just because she lost her kindness. yep. honestly not a good look regarding all those people out there who are low/no empathy and can still be wonderful nice people but i digress

at one point she complains about why she needs to keep her power rather than go back to being just Her and i fucking wanted to scream

she has like. half a dozen degrees, clearly a couple of friends even if she’s awkward, and she’s got a life that was perfectly okay before she made the wish. as someone who is also socially awkward as hell, it infuriated me to here her acting like it was the fucking end of the world she couldn’t be more extroverted or whatever. there are ways to work on that!!! the movie trying to convince the audience she had a legit reason to not un-wish her wish (for the good of the entire world) was stupid and insulting

also her transformation between ‘looks human, wearing cheetah-pattern clothing‘ to ‘humanoid with cheetah fur/skin/appearance’ literally just. happened. for no reason. that was stupid

y’know what else is stupid? the wishstone. it was clearly just a plot device, and a poorly executed one at that. it isn’t even consistent in how it works

and they did a whole side thing with like. how it had the language of the gods written on part of it and it appeared in random locations across history around the time of great tragedies and,,, that was it???

they never explored the divine connection??? who planted it or why??? how it location traveled or anything????

like i said. poor plot device

i move on now to steve

oh boy steve

he’s brought back to life by diana’s wish on the wishstone, but... it causes him to come back in someone else’s body, quantum leap style. this is. weird. and is never ever addressed by him or wonder woman except once in a throw away comment. like. diana and steve kiss and are implied to have sex while steve is in someone else’s body and neither of them seem to care. this is not good!!

and then his relationship with diana? HORRIBLE

in the first movie they were barely starting to fall in love, only barely a couple even if that. more importantly they were friends, and that night he died diana didn’t lose a potential lover so much as she lost her first non-Amazonian friend

but WW84 portrays their relationship as if they were not only already a couple, but one close enough that even after forty years since steve’s death diana is still completely and hopelessly in love with him to the point that she’s literally hanging off his arm as soon as he’s back and making love that very night

it plays again once more into the misrepresentation of wonder woman’s character (how stereotypically hollywood female to fall over herself at the sight of her love interest) and it wrecks their relationship, which had been a lovely friends-who-could-be-more

what they should’ve done was focus on that friendship, build it back up after the long gap for wonder woman, and then started to rebuild that possible romance (and tear it down at the perfect moment... right when steve had to go again... ah that would’ve been lovely)

but they wanted to go in full-haul on the romance and it just felt. wrong and weak to me. diana’s refusal to consider giving up her wish (to get her powers back and save the world) is bc she doesn’t want to let steve go again, which makes more sense in the context of a first and true friend rather than a hastily slapped together love interest

steve’s character was generally good tbh but the way he played into the story? bad

moving on... the main villain of the movie? sucks. he’s just. fucking awful

despite a motivation being given that he wants to have money, he launches into wanting to take over the world for no real reason. he takes advantage of people for this and almost destroys the world he wants to rule for it. the main reason he stops this is for his son, who up until now he largely ignored and didn’t seem to care that much for outside of basic obligations. and the movie dares try to make him sympathetic by throwing in the fact he grew up poor and was bullied and not liked which i HATE

lots of people are/have been poor. lots of people are/have been bullied (myself included). that does NOT justify them DESTROYING THE WORLD TRYING TO TAKE IT OVER. can it be used to show the audience why he does what he does? yes. but to use it and clearly try to make it a reason to hand-wave-away what he did? NO. FUCK NO

also fucking. y’know how wonder woman took down this villain? she talked to him and the world. she gave a stirring speech while she laid slumped against a wall, not injured, just too weak to beat a bit of wind. she talked and she looped her lasso around his leg so she could talk to the world to to convince them to give up their wishes

once again... the mischaracterization

in the first movie, wonder woman gives a stirring speech while fighting Areas. it’s done in her battle, beating the god of war up while reminding him of what she stood for, who she was, why she would keep fighting for a broken world

it was BEAUTIFUL. it was MEANINGFUL. it was BADASS but SINCERE

this was weak. and it clearly wanted to be more than it was

the whole movie wants to be more than it is- it wants to have an important meaningful message like the first movie, about wishes for the self and war and the world and whatever. and it wants it so badly it does it horribly

the message is ham-handed yet messy and unclear and not right. it doesn’t make sense, and it feels poorly plotted. the movie thinks it’s more than it is and that makes it very hard to watch

and to finish my rant off... WW84 lied to its audience

did you see any ads for WW84? i did. they were bright, vibrant, funky music, stunning moments, action and intrigue. i was thrilled for a movie like it

the actual movie isn’t that

it’s not nearly as action filled, it’s not as ‘80s-focused as it leads you to believe, some of the most prominently featured moments barely matter

the lightning swing? pointless, as at that point in the movie wonder woman’s learned how to fly and does it for no reason but the trailers

and that cool suit? introduced in a random myth for no reason halfway through the movie, brought in at random with no explanation, only there for show and the trailers

WW84 is not the movie is lead people to believe it was, and the movie it is is poorly executed and insulting to a variety of peopler/minorities

if you’re gonna watch it, pirate it. i can give you a link. just don’t give dc your money or your legit views for it

#that got long #but what can i say? im passionate about my bad movies #and ww84?#that was a bad movie #if anyone wants clarification on smth let me know #wonder woman 1984 #ww84 #ww84 spoilers #the cryptid speaks #lost in the fray

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artificialqueens · 5 years

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Sweet like Sugar (Branjie) - Delia

AN: Hey lovelies! This is my first time writing fic, so please be gentle but also let me know what you think��a little Branjie sugar mommy for your nerves x ps: if you have any questions, comments or concerns feel free to hit me up on @thvnderfuckz pps: tw for some, very minor, implied daddy kink

BLH

25/F/New York City

I’m a 25 year old dancer from Toronto, working to start my career. I like fashion, nights out, and travelling. Seeking a partner who is fun, adventurous, and willing to support me in pursuit of my dream.

Brooke Lynn read over her bio for what must have been the seventh time in as many minutes and let out a sigh. Each draft that she’d written had sounded more robotic than the last. It’d been a long time since she had to write anything like this, having deleted Tinder, Bumble, and HER off her phone not long after she left Toronto. Since moving to New York, she’d discovered that she much preferred going out and finding women to hook up with in person. With her long blonde hair, dancer’s physique, and innate flirtiness, it was easy enough to find someone willing to take her home for the night. Easier, at least, than talking to a girl on an app for weeks, only to find out that she was interested in a long term commitment, and having to deal with their messy emotions after Brooke told them that she wasn’t interested. If there was one thing that she did not do, it was relationships.

And now, she was trying to get paid to be in one.

She’d be lying if she said that she never thought she’d be in a position like this. From the time Brooke had told her friends and family that she’d wanted to pursue dance as a full time career, she’d been given the “wouldn’t you rather something more secure” speech more times, and by more people than she could be bothered to count. Even her older sister Katya, who’d chosen to make abstract semi-sacrilegious art her vocation in life, had tried to suggest to her that she do something with a future that was less uncertain. But Brooke knew that she was born to dance, no matter what anyone tried to tell her to the contrary. If anything, their doubt fuelled her drive, and made it all the sweeter when she’d been offered a role in ensemble of the Broadway production of Moulin Rouge! upon her graduation from Ryerson. The moment that she’d stepped off the plane at JFK and stepped into the apartment that she would be sharing with another ensemble member from the show, Scarlet, she felt as though she was living her wildest dreams come true.

In all of her excitement at the time, Brooke forgot that the most wonderful dreams often lead to the harshest wake ups.

Four months into her run, the cast began to notice a dwindling number of fans at the stage door after each performance. Five months into her run, cast and crew alike began whispering about finding new jobs soon. Six months into her run, on a particularly humid Sunday in July, the cast and crew were gathered by the production team before everyone left the theatre and were told that the show would be closing at the beginning of September, after the Labour Day weekend. Brooke immediately started panicking at the prospect of being out of a job in one of the most expensive cities in the world. There was nothing she wanted less than to have to move back home to Toronto with her tail between her legs.

It had been two years since Moulin Rouge! closed, and although Brooke had managed to avoid making the move back home, she hadn’t been able to get a job performing since. She was always too tall, or too technical, or didn’t have enough personality. She’d been able to find a job in the meantime, teaching classes at a dance studio in Tribeca, but the money she made from that was barely enough to cover her necessities. It certainly didn’t cover luxuries such as brunch with your ex-roommate, as Brooke found out after her credit card was declined at her and Scarlet’s bi-weekly date. She barely had time to try and form an apology before she witnessed Scarlet reaching into her purse and placing a crisp one hundred dollar bill on the table, telling the waitress to keep the sixty dollars in change. Her embarrassed expression transformed into one of jaw-dropped shock as the redhead pulled her from the restaurant.

On the walk back to the subway, Scarlet revealed to Brooke that she’d been various “mutually beneficial relationships” with different men since she’d first moved to the city when she was 19, and that it had been her main source of income even while she was performing.

“It’s easy money, plus it’s kind of empowering,” explained Scarlet in her low voice, which still held a hint of the drawl indicative of her Southern upbringing. “It’s like, they have the money but I have all the emotional power. Without me generously donating my time to them, all these men have are their frigid marriages, or soul sucking jobs. A lot of the time the only thing standing between these powerful, rich men and a complete nervous break is me. And if that’s not power, I don’t know what is. So if I have to laugh at a few bad jokes and kiss a couple of CEOs to be able to live the kind of life I want, all while knowing that I could end any of these men at any given moment, then so be it.”

Oddly inspired by her friend’s speech, Brooke downloaded the sugar dating app onto her phone later that day.

And now here she was, sitting in front of her laptop at 11:00 pm on a Saturday night, drinking a bottle of wine and stress reading her three sentence bio for at least the tenth time. Fuck it, she thought, this is as good as it’s gonna get.

After clicking the “submit” button, Brooke was redirected to a page showing all of the potential sugar daddies in her area. As she scrolled through pages upon pages of photos of headless torsos, she became increasingly regretful of her decision to not filter out men immediately.

CEToEs

Disgusting.

KinkyExec

Nope.

DominantDaddy

Absolutely not.

Brooke was a lesbian, and had known that since she was 14. However, Scarlet told her that there were far more sugar daddies than sugar mommies in the New York area, and that a lot of the time the men didn’t necessarily even want sex. But as she clocked the usernames of several of the daddies on the app, it was clear that the redhead had either lied to her or was somehow the most blissfully oblivious girl in the city.

The blonde promptly returned to her settings page and deselected men as an interest. When she returned to the home page, she was delighted to see the profiles of fifty-or-so women pop up. She began scrolling again, hoping that someone would catch her eye.

WorldsMostPunkRockMoms

Meh. The two blonde women in the thumbnail picture were definitely beautiful, but Brooke didn’t know how she felt about getting involved with a couple who had a child.

Detoxicant

The woman in this picture looked like she’d had a lot of plastic surgery. Still, she was hot. Brooke tapped the little heart icon next to the photo and continued scrolling.

Toward the bottom of the page there was one profile that had a little green dot next to the thumbnail. Brooke took a little comfort in the fact that she wasn’t the only one on this app at this time on a weekend night. She clicked on the profile and two pictures filled her screen. The first was a headless torso shot of a woman wearing an oversized Versace t-shirt as a dress. Although her face was out of frame, Brooke could tell that the woman’s hair was a caramel brown, at least at the tips, and went to just below her collarbone. The second image was another faceless picture, but in this one the woman was wearing a spaghetti strapped red dress, showing off her deeply tanned skin and an, in Brooke’s opinion, weirdly specific chest tattoo of a hairless cat atop a red rose. The bio beneath the pictures read:

V 23/F/New York City

no face pics because i gotta stay lowkey. promise i’m not gonna kill you or anything like that, just lookin for a cute girl i can take out and trEat right.

Brooke rolled her eyes at the innuendo and let out a small huff of a laugh. The girl obviously had some sort of sense of humour, which she supposed was important. And it was pretty impressive that someone so young was in a position where they could support someone else financially.

The green dot was still displayed next to V’s username. She was still online. Brooke took a deep breath and clicked the chat icon at the bottom of the screen, typing out a quick, hopefully flirty-but-without-coming-on-too-strong, message.

BLH: I hate to break it to you, but saying ‘I’m not gonna kill you’ sounds exactly like what someone who would kill me would say ;)

Brooke quickly exited out of the app and opened up Instagram to check and see if Katya or her wife had added any new photos of their cats or dog. Before she could even begin typing her sister’s name into the search bar, her phone dinged, letting her know that V had responded.

V: hate to break it to you babe but saying youre looking for a partner sounds like youre tryna open up a lawyers office

Brooke swore under her breathe. She knew she sounded too robotic.

BLH: Oh god, I’m sorry. I’ve never done anything

V: lol relax mami, youre cute with all your worrying

She bit down on her lower lip, half in frustration and half trying to suppress a smile. V was already teasing her about her worrying, and they hadn’t even met yet.

BLH: Aren’t you more of the mommy in this situation though ;)

V: i mean i usually prefer daddy ;)

Brooke felt a quick rush of heat to her center at the word “daddy”. She closed her eyes trying to stave away memories of various nights in the alleyways behind various bars with various women.

BLH: I think I can make that work ;)

V: listen, not to be too upfront but youre gorgeous and id love to take you out sometime if youd want?

V: we could meet and figure out an allowance or something if thats what you want! ive done this once before and it was a really good experience for both of us…i gave her around $8000 a month for rent and stuff but we could figure out something specially for you if you need somethin different

Brooke could’ve sworn she felt her heart stop when she read the word “month”. She’d never been with one single person for more than three nights, much less on a month to month basis. But V seemed nice at least. And if not nice, she was at least experienced at this kind of arrangement, and was apparently quite generous to boot. Eight thousand dollars a month would cover her rent and utilities almost four times over. Eight thousand dollars a month would mean that she wouldn’t have to worry about getting her card declined at brunch. Eight thousand dollars a month meant that she wouldn’t have to pick up every possible shift at the studio, and could spend more time going to auditions.

Eight thousand dollars a month meant that she was definitely not turning V down right off the bat.

BLH: I’d love that. Name the time and place, I’m free when you are.

BLH: Daddy ;)

Brooke Lynn Hayhoe doesn’t do relationships — but for eight thousand dollars a month, she was willing to fake it.

#rpdr fanfiction #branjie #brooke lynn hytes #vanessa vanjie mateo #scarlet envy #lesbian au #sugar mommy au #sweet like sugar #delia #concrit welcome #tw daddy kink

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outoforderaro · 5 years

Text

a long post about amatonormativity mainly

happy aromantic spectrum awareness week, heres a thing i wrote on twitter and i was right it’s very long sorry.

amatonormativity: the normative social force that holds romantic relationships as intrisically better, more valuable, closer, and more necessary than other types of relationships, and that everyone seeks a romantic relationship as a central feature in their life.

this slots together with other things, like that romantic relationships (and only romantic ones) should also be sexual ones, or that they should be monogamous. amatonormativity was created by and for aros, but it hurts other people as well that arent doing romance "right"

so that's the definition, and there's two sides of this, like other normativities: there's the side that assumes it's true for everyone, and pressures everyone to be under it, and the side that punishes and ostracizes people for not holding to it.

the 1st is almost always described alongside amatonormativity, as examples of what is meant. language like "just friends" or "more than friends", that "single" is implied to mean "looking", that everyone wants to get married and to a romantic partner, that "love" means romo love

the 2nd gets talked about by aros, but not as often ime in connection to amatonormativity? but it's the sort of stuff it enables when people break it. and it's from taking an inverse of that assumption: all people do A, A is wonderful. people that dont do A must be wrong!

im realizing just now that it's a similar idea as to when you find out someone doesnt like your favorite food or movie ("what do you mean you hate pasta?! whats wrong with you?"), and ive used the "this is something everyone else is super into but you, but to 11" analogy before

it's that in earnest though. something must be wrong with me because i dont feel romantic attraction, i must be "broken". or heartless bc i must not be able to feel anything for anyone, which leads to a lot of ableist "armchair diagnosing" (to put it graciously/least triggering)

that false premise that amatonorm. is true for all people leads to a lot of "well, then they must not be people", or people in a "correct", "normal" way, which leads to loads of about how inhuman people like me are, that above ableism, etc. bc "[romo] love is what makes us human"

for both sides of this, im bringing up language as the easiest thing to point to. the problem is not what phrases you use. idc if you stop saying "more than friends" if youre still making that prioritization. same with this second side of things. the words are symptoms of beliefs

i think the first gets connected more to amatonormativity bc the term is only every explained by exasperated aros trying to get alloromantic people to listen to us, which is hard enough when you're only slightly implying that some phrases are less than cool.

now, the point i had muddled into this all in the first draft was connecting my romance repulsion to the isolation a romantic thing causes me, and how it falls into this split of amatonormativity

a lot of it is from feeling like im on the outside of a giant conversation. imagine everyone's talking about a show you dont watch but theyre huge fans, and turn it to 11, way more people, way more persistent. it'd be hard to feel connected to those people, right?

youd never have a real context for anything, and nothing to give or gain from those conversations. it's very isolating and hard not to feel excluded if that's all anyone's ever talking about, and assumes you are also deeply invested in this

then imagine if people were earnestly being like "you havent seen/read/etc this? whats wrong with you? we're gonna go watch this right now!" and actually did, regardless of what you wanted. actually thought something was wrong with you or that you should be forced to try it

so, my feelings of isolation. some, i feel, might be unavoidable. romance is The Popular thing lmao, so there'll be things im not into, but its important not to assume that feelings are universal, or people dont exist/are wrong/etc if they dont feel that way

there've been a lot of shows ive been into, that have implied that people like me dont exist, that no one could possibly be like me, or that being like me would be terrible or inhuman or "dead", even while handling well other queer and feelings of not belonging. so step 1) dont

#aromantic #aromantic awareness week #asaw #asaw 2019 #aromantic spectrum awareness week #rj talks

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xechowritesx · 6 years

Note

Can u please do 17. things you said that i wish you hadn’t x Steve and make it super angsty. Thanks :)

17. Thing you said that I wish you hadn’t.

Warnings: Language, nudity, implied smut, and mentions of self-esteem issues.

A/N: Got a little carried away, as I always do with angsty fics.

The air is thick with the musk of sex intermingled with sweat, the temperature particularly humid against your bare skin. Your muscles ached with a soreness that was all too familiar, from the tips of your toes to the center of your abdomen. It was a tender kind of ache, one that you had come to crave almost insatiably. An ache that only one, infuriatingly handsome super-soldier could satisfy.

You watched with glossy eyes as Steve slid quickly out of bed and made his way to the adjacent bathroom. Your gaze broke away from his perfectly muscular form and moved toward the clock your nightstand. You silently wondered how many more precious seconds you had left with your commanding officer. Sure, it was unorthodox and entirely against regulation, but it hadn’t stopped either of you.

“Have you seen my boxers?”

You remained silent, opting instead to point at the plaid shorts haphazardly hanging from the foot lamp. Steve nodded appreciatively and began retrieving the clothes you’d nearly ripped off his body in a passionate frenzy.

“When’s your next mission?” You were the one to break the uncomfortable silence.

“I leave for Eastern Europe in the morning, mainly reconnaissance on Rumlow.” Steve explained, tugging his shirt down his torso.

“How long?” Sitting up, you collected your hair into a messy top knot. You weren’t entirely sure why you were attempting to keep a conversation going, knowing full well your relationship with Steve was purely of the physical category.

“I’ll be back Sunday.”

“What time should I expect you to be here for your post-mission fuck?” You shot back.

Steve only huffed in response, shaking his head frustratedly as he slipped into his dark-wash jeans. His expression was contorted in an emotion you couldn’t quite decipher, his piercing eyes darker than usual.

“I asked you a question.” You insisted, against your better judgement. Steve turned just in time to watch your naked form step out of bed, each curve of your body on full display.

“I don’t like it when you call it that.” Steve’s voice fell a few timbres into his usual authoritative Captain’s tone. You rolled your eyes, hands falling to your waist.

“What? Fucking? That’s what this, isn’t Captain?”

“It’s more than that…” Steve’s words trail into a shameful silence. You quickly tossed an oversized shirt over your body, suddenly hyper aware of how small he made you feel.

“Don’t give me that shit.” You retorted. You barely recognized your own voice.

“I care about you.”

A beat.

“Then why do you leave?” You tried. Steve visibly stiffened at the question, your heart dropping to the pit of your stomach.

“You know damn well why. This,” Steve pointed between your bodies, “us, it can’t happen. You know that the agency and Stark would never accept it. You could lose your job-”

“My job? That’s why you fuck me a few times a month and then pretend I don’t exist? Because you’re worried about my job?”

“What do you want me to say, Y/N?” Steve is defeated, already moving toward the door. “That’s it’s because you’re not pretty enough? Or smart enough? You want me to confirm all your pathetic self-loathing?”

The minute the words left his mouth, Steve finds himself regretting them. There were many things the pair of you had shared in confidence, your continuous uphill battle with your self-esteem being one of the toughest and most private. Steve watched painfully as you crouched into yourself, your eyes brimmed with tears. He wanted to make you angry, but he never intended to hurt you.

“Y/N, I-” He began, attempting to explain he hadn’t met what he said.

“Just get out, Steve.” You half-choked. “Get out!”

#Anonymous #steve x reader #steve rogers x reader #captain america x reader #drabble #drabbles #angst #steve rogers angst #this one hurt

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doggonneit · 7 years

Text

The Last Red Scribble | Part 1/2

Fandom: Haikyuu!!

Pairing/Characters: Kuroo/Tsukishima

Rating: T for Teen

Warnings: Single Parent AU

A.N. This is a part of the KuroTsuki Gift Exchange 2017, written for @moonislander on Tumblr. Hope you enjoy!

Italics is Tsukishima. Bold is Kuroo.

[Read on AO3]

Monday PM

(2:33) I’m about to slam my head into the wall. (2:33) Tobio got into another fight. (2:34) He’s fucking five, how does he keep picking fights.

(2:35) what a champ

(2:35) What the fuck, Akiteru. (2:35) You’re not supposed to say that.

(2:36) wrong number bud but legit (2:36) tobios got a future in cage fighting (2:36) whos tobio

(2:38) Oh, sorry. Wrong number.

(2:40) well dont leave me hanging (2:40) i need to know who to put my money on in the future

(2:41) Don’t make this weirder than it already is.

(2:41) :)))))

(2:42) Tobio’s my son.

(2:43) are you an old man (2:43) is that why you started texting me (2:44) STRANGER DANGER STRANGER DANGER

(2:45) What the fuck, no. (2:46) I messed up my brother’s new number. (2:46) Evidently.

(2:46) eviDENTly (2:47) arent you all smart and proper (2:47) thats how i like em

(2:49) Are you seriously flirting with me over text? (2:49) You don’t know stranger danger at all. (2:50) I don’t have time for this.

(2:53) :((((( (2:55) come back

(2:56) I have to deal with my son.

(2:56) what an adulty adult (2:57) tell tobio hes a fucken champ

Tuesday AM

(7:22) sooo (7:22) i know your brothers name and your sons name (7:22) but not your name

(7:25) …

(7:25) hint hint

(7:26) Have you seen the latest stranger danger campaign? (7:26) It’s got your face all over it.

(7:27) you think youre being funny but my mates crack jokes about my ugly mug making children cry (7:28) would tobio cry if he ever saw me

(7:30) He doesn’t even know what you look like.

(7:31) *image attached*

(7:34) I really don’t have time for this. I’m getting Tobio ready for school.

(7:35) if life were a party youd be the clown that sucks all the fun away (7:35) XP

(7:36) Why are you making that face?

(7:36) you hurt my feelings so im sticking my tongue out at you

(7:38) No-one uses that emoji for hurt feelings.

(7:39) i just did (7:39) XP (7:39) oh look i just did it again (7:39) XP (7:39) and again look at me go

(7:42) All right, all right, I’ll ask. (7:44) Tobio says you look like you killed a cat.

(7:44) how does someone even look like that (7:44) your son needs glasses (7:45) what do you think then (7:45) smouldering eyes wicked grin (7:45) admit it im pretty

(7:46) Yeah, pretty atrocious. (7:46) What’s with that hair?

(7:47) HI THIS IS KUROOS BEST FREIDN FOERVER BOKUTO PLS DONT METNION HIS BEHDEAD IT MAKES HM SELF CONSCOIUS

(7:47) Aww. Is Kuroo sulking now?

(7:47) sajfkdsjp (7:47) asdffhajlkkasdfghijkl

(7:48) I feel like I should be concerned. (7:50) I am actually concerned.

(7:51) how do i get rid of a body

(7:51) What.

(7:51) how do i (7:51) get rid of (7:51) a body

(7:51) Cook him and serve him to the police who knock on your door asking for his whereabouts.

(7:52) babe thats brilliant (7:52) youre a committed accomplice now

(7:52) On a scale of 1-10, how often do you hit on nameless and faceless strangers over the phone?

(7:52) 1 (7:53) its only ever been you (7:53) *heart emoji*

(7:53) I’m flattered.

(7:53) we have a dilemma (7:54) you know my name and my face (7:54) ive lost the advantage (7:54) who are you o mysterious phone man

(7:54) You really want to know?

(7:55) yes!!

(7:55) Well (7:55) My name is (7:55) *middle finger emoji*

(7:56) i am (7:56) fucking betrayed (7:56) my own accomplice

(7:57) :)))))

Wednesday PM

(4:17) *image attached* (4:17) fight gloves for tobio when he grows up lololol

(4:20) Don’t even joke about that.

(4:21) did he get into another fight (4:21) whatd he do steal another kids party pie

(4:22) He ruined someone’s sandcastle.

(4:22) that punk

(4:22) He also threw the bucket at their head and made them cry.

(4:23) holy shit (4:23) i know you cant see but im pissing myself laughing

(4:23) That’s the second time this month. (4:24) Is he going for a new record? How concerned should I be? (4:24) I should ask my brother for advice.

(4:24) okay but in all seriousness (4:25) dont kids usually act out because theyre upset about things

(4:26) Yep.

(4:26) you sound like you know whats going on

(4:27) Yep.

(4:27) is the thing not an easy fix

(4:28) Tobio can’t exactly move back into his old neighbourhood and old school.

(4:28) ohhh (4:28) i get that totally been there (4:29) though that happened to me in middle school so i handled it differently

(4:30) You mean you didn’t stomp on sandcastles and throw buckets at people’s heads? (4:30) Shocking.

(4:31) real mature of me ayy (4:31) but its chill tobio just needs time to adjust

(4:32) He’s been living with me for four months already.

(4:33) hes trying to survive a new environment (4:33) go easy on him

(4:35) All good and well until he accidentally kills one of his classmates.

(4:35) what could he possibly do (4:35) nah dont answer that

(4:36) You’re not inspiring much confidence right now.

(4:37) okay hows this (4:38) the most dangerous thing in a school is a pencil (4:38) if he stabs it through someones eye (4:38) what are the chances of a five year old having that good of an aim

(4:39) We could be surprised.

(4:40) lets give tobio the benefit of the doubt (4:40) have i brought your fears to rest or nah

(4:50) You’re interesting to talk to, I’ll give you that.

(4:50) is that why youve kept talking to me despite the anonymous and rather suspicious nature of our relationship

(4:50) Sure.

(4:51) *heart eyes emoji*

Thursday PM

(6:44) ive been thinking

(6:46) Make sure you give yourself a break every ten minutes. We wouldn’t want to strain your mental capabilities.

(6:47) hush child i got something to say (6:47) about tobio sort of

(6:48) I’m listening.

(6:49) so yesterdays conversation made me go all introspective (6:49) and if all tobios doing is throwing things (6:50) the lil guy will go far in life (6:50) i mean when i was five i was eating sand

(6:51) Congratulations, you just tripped over the lowest bar society set for its most basic standards.

(6:51) savage i love it (6:52) bokuto just called me a masochist (6:52) he doesnt even know what that means i bet he learned it from akaashi

(6:54) … (6:55) Who’s Akaashi?

(6:55) the most beautiful man to grace the earth and bokutos boyfriend (6:55) im not even kidding his face was sculpted by gods (6:56) *image attached*

(6:57) Wow.

(6:57) exactly (6:57) no one knows how bokuto snagged him (6:58) my moneys on witchcraft

(6:59) Have a little more faith in your Best Freidn Foerver.

(6:59) hes my best bro but he does NOT have that much game

(6:59) You misspelled Best Freidn Foerver.

(7:00) all right he types like an electrocuted toddler (7:00) hes there for me during the good bad and ugly (7:00) and i support him 100% (7:01) but theres no logical explanation for how he got akaashi

(7:01) Maybe he has charm.

(7:02) gasp (7:02) babe (7:02) did you just imply i dont have any charm

(7:03) I didn’t say anything of the sort but it’s an apt description.

(7:03) you really are a savage (7:04) totally my type just saying

(7:05) For all you know I’m a sixty year old man with whiskers and a pot belly.

(7:05) im a personality kinda guy anyway (7:05) so what do you look like

(7:07) Shh.

(7:07) ?

(7:07) Can you hear that?

(7:07) ??

(7:08) Stranger danger.

(7:08) DUDE COME ON (7:08) or are you actually a sixty year old man with whiskers and a pot belly (7:08) because no judgement if you are

(7:10) *image attached*

(7:11) holy shit (7:11) HOLYS HIT (7:11) AJGSFAJKALHHJKKKLLLL

(7:13) Uh. (7:14) Hello? (7:15) Are you there? (7:18) I’m actually kind of worried now.

(7:20) Hi, this is Akaashi. Kuroo’s fine; he’s muttering to himself on the floor. (7:21) Something about being sculpted by gods and touched by angels?

(7:22) What the fuck.

(7:22) Nice selfie :)

Friday PM

(9:28) arms (9:28) abs (9:28) legs (9:28) sore

(9:31) Do I really want to know? (9:31) No, I don’t.

(9:32) :( (9:32) i experienced life death and hell all in the same day

(9:33) Now I can’t not know.

(9:33) i had vball training for a match next week and it was torture (9:33) and when we thought it was done no (9:34) we had practice matches with alumni and it was torture round two (9:34) then i had coaching which i usually love (9:34) but the kids kept spiking balls at me (9:35) 10 POINTS IF YOU HIT HIS BODY 50 POINTS IF YOU HIT HIS HEAD 100 POINTS IF YOU HIT HIS NOSE

(9:36) You play volleyball?

(9:37) thats all you took from that

(9:37) I used to play volleyball in high school.

(9:37) wait are you serious (9:37) what position??

(9:38) Middle blocker.

(9:38) me too!! (9:38) what are the chances of us both playing vball and being middle blockers (9:39) this is destiny i feel it

(9:40) That was another lifetime ago lol.

(9:40) once a vball player always a vball player (9:40) how tall are you

(9:41) 195cm, why?

(9:43) 195 and yOU DONT PLAY VBALL (9:43) this is a crime (9:44) tell me tobio plays vball

(9:45) I... don’t think he’s ever tried it?

(9:46) the outrage (9:46) how could you (9:47) i just felt my heart crack (9:47) oohhh the pain

(9:47) Poor baby. Want me to kiss it better?

(9:47) i (9:47) ijakl

(9:48) ?? (9:50) Did you disappear on me again. (9:50) This seems to be a growing trend.

(9:51) Hi, this is Akaashi again. Kuroo is currently incapacifjskkl (9:51) WAHT DID U DO TO MY BSET FREIND FOREBER WHYS HE ALL RED N CHOKN ON HIS WORSD

(9:52) Oh. (9:52) Scroll up.

(9:52) OHO (9:53) OHOHO

Saturday AM

(11:10) my mates wont stop laughing at me (11:10) i live in a house of dicks (11:11) cant even escape them theyre on my team (11:11) i blame you

(11:15) Sucks to be you lol.

(11:15) are you taking pleasure in my pain

(11:15) It sounds wrong when you put it that way.

(11:15) ;) (11:16) i’m still upset though (11:16) make me feel better?

(11:17) You seem to think I possess the ability to feel pity. (11:17) I don’t.

(11:18) you know what you do possess (11:18) the ability to feel annoyance (11:18) ! (11:18) ! (11:18) ! (11:18) ! (11:18) ! (11:18) is it annoying yet (11:18) ! (11:18) ! (11:18) ! (11:18) ! (11:18) !

(11:19) ALL RIGHT, STOP.

(11:19) victory

(11:20) What do you want.

(11:17) whats your name

(11:17) Are you serious.

(11:17) i wanna know

(11:18) You reek of desperation.

(11:18) not gonna change my mind

(11:19) …

(11:19) wanna do the whole !!! thing again

(11:21) Fine. (11:21) You’ll ask politely.

(11:21) dom huh (11:21) im into that (11:22) will you pretty please with a cherry on top tell me what your name is

(11:22) N (11:22) O (11:22) *heart emoji*

(11:24) i cant believe (11:24) how could you (11:24) youre so mean

(11:24) :)))))

(11:25) shouldve expected it (11:25) do you always play with peoples hearts like this

(11:25) I enjoy jerking you around. You make some pretty good entertainment.

(11:26) glad to be of service :’)

(11:26) I suppose I could throw you a bone.

(11:26) im not falling for it this time

(11:26) Tsukishima.

(11:27) …

(11:27) My name is Tsukishima.

(11:27) it is (11:27) up down left right with you

(11:27) Disappointed?

(11:28) NEVER WITH YOU (11:28) TSUKKIIII

(11:28) No. (11:28) Do not.

(11:28) i love your name its beautiful like you

(11:29) I revoke your right to say my name ever again.

(11:29) TSUKKIIII (11:29) *heart eyes emoji*

(11:32) I have never regretted anything more in my life.

Sunday PM

(3:24) You said you have a volleyball match next week, right?

(3:28) is this a dream (3:28) are you actually texting me first

(3:29) Miracles abound today.

(3:29) yeah i have a match next week why

(3:29) I mentioned it to Tobio and he got really excited. (3:30) He made me explain everything. I spent hours talking about rules and moves.

(3:30) i knew that kid had the vball genes in him

(3:30) I even dug up some old practice tapes from high school. (3:31) He’s obsessed with setting.

(3:31) hed get along with my setter (3:31) that arrogant ass (3:31) i love him though

(3:32) *image attached*

(3:33) what… is that

(3:33) Tobio’s lack of artistic talent.

(3:33) i hope you didnt tell him that

(3:34) He said it was you blocking and scoring the winning point.

(3:35) he drew a picture of me?

(3:35) He captured your likeness down to the last red scribble.

(3:35) omg… omg...

(3:37) It’s not that big of a deal.

(3:37) youre not ruining this for me (3:37) this is the best day of my life

(3:37) Remember when we talked about low standards?

(3:37) your son loves me

(3:38) He drew a picture of you.

(3:38) and how many other people has he drawn???

(3:38) …

(3:38) thought so (3:39) tell my biggest fan i said hello and thank you (3:39) its the prettiest picture ive ever gotten

(3:39) Don’t get nudes much, huh.

(3:40) wow (3:40) WOWW (3:40) that went beyond savage (3:40) that was straight up murder

(3:41) You like it.

(3:41) yeah im really wondering about that masochistic streak

(3:41) About that.

(3:42) ??

(3:42) I was thinking (3:42) If you were interested (3:42) I could help you explore that.

(3:44) i just dropped my fuckign phone (3:44) are you fucking with me right now

(3:45) Yes.

(3:46) i fucking hate you

(3:46) No, you don’t.

(3:46) no i don’t

(3:46) Why do you keep falling for these things.

(3:47) actually im falling for you

(3:47) Seriously.

(3:47) hope (3:47) its all i got buddy (3:49) is this going to be like last time when you said no but then changed your mind

(3:50) No.

(3:50) dammit

Monday PM

(7:18) happy one week anniversary babe (7:18) do i get a gift (7:18) eyebrow wiggle

(7:21) Did you just type -eyebrow wiggle- at me

(7:22) *video attached*

(7:23) I did not ask for a video of you wiggling your eyebrows.

(7:23) its my gift to you

(7:23) I’m so… grateful.

(7:24) cmon gift gift gift

(7:24) I don’t know, I don’t have anything. (7:24) Actually (7:25) *image attached*

(7:25) omg is that tobio (7:25) hes so fucken cute wtf (7:26) look at those hamster cheeks (7:26) whats he eating

(7:26) Blueberry cupcake. (7:26) It’s his reward for behaving in school.

(7:27) aww no fights today?

(7:28) His teacher said he engaged positively with other students. He was trying to play volleyball with them.

(7:28) omg thats adorable (7:28) i see where he gets it from (7:28) are you teaching him how to play

(7:30) I taught him how to receive but I’m rusty. (7:30) I should look into classes for him. (7:30) Do they even have classes for kids that young?

(7:31) the rec centre where i coach does (7:31) idk about other places though

(7:31) Whereabouts is your rec centre?

(7:32) shh

(7:32) You’re not doing the stranger danger thing on me.

(7:32) do you hear that

(7:32) Can you hear my sigh travelling across the wind.

(7:33) STRANGER DANGER

(7:33) Are you done.

(7:33) my centres in tokyo lol

(7:34) It wouldn’t happen to be the Tokyo Sports and Recreation Centre?

(7:34) how did you know that (7:34) oh my god this is real (7:34) STRANGER DANGER

(7:36) It’s a twenty minute walk from my place.

(7:36) i know i just joked about stranger danger but should you really be telling me that

(7:37) Take it as proof that I don’t think you’re a predatory serial killer.

(7:37) thats the nicest thing youve ever said to me (7:38) *heart emoji* (7:38) well if youre interested the kiddy classes are wed 5pm and sat 10am (7:38) you can go to one or both

(7:40) Hmm.

(7:40) times no good?

(7:42) My brother has Tobio on both those days. (7:42) I’ll have to talk to him about this.

(7:43) ahh dont wanna encroach on uncle nephew bonding time

(7:43) I don’t think Akiteru will mind-- he used to play volleyball too.

(7:43) how did you ever think tobio wouldnt be a vball player (7:44) its clearly in his genes

(7:44) Wishful thinking. I never really liked volleyball.

(7:45) what no (7:45) why

(7:46) It was just a school club. I only did it because it was something to do.

(7:47) you come into my house

(7:48) Lol.

(7:48) well hey its paying off now (7:48) i bet tobio looks at you like youre a god

(7:49) Yeah. (7:49) It’s the first time he’s really looked at me. (7:50) So thanks. (7:50) :)

#kurotsuki #kurotsukiexchange #Kuroo Tetsurou #tsukishima kei #haikyuu!!

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saibh29 · 7 years

Text

Thief (Part 6)

Pairing: Bellamy / Reader

Warnings: Swearing, Violence, Light Smut (PG13)

AN: We’re getting to the end of my plotted out map for this story, so I hope you all enjoy this part. Also, my editing seems to have gone to shit so if anyone knows anyone who would be willing to do some Beta work with me please let me know? I’m happy to work with people as well on a back and forth basis.

If you want to read the previous parts of this story find them here:::: Part One , Part Two , Part Three , Part Four , Part Five

Please feel free to add yourself to my taglist list over here.... TAGLIST

@no-other-names-availible-blog @angelaiswriting @selldraug @angryares @thenovarose @georgiagrl1990 @punk-rock-5-sos @mindofthescattered @dontstopxx @iamabeautifulperson18 @madelinecraig03 @ka-x-in @im-hurric4ne @mesmericbell @something--awesome @weirdpotato-14 @putinontheritzz @soulslaststand @fuckthatfeeling @ember1201 @morganlb23 @maria-tifa @kitkatbadass @cordelia-stark-jones @tomhoppersarms @fakingintrest @artprincessbree @dreamer-lover-laughter @artprincessbree @rime-warrior @captainvaneswife @coffeebooksandfandom @diaryoftherealme @blusnowflakee @ineedyourloveandsupport @neverunderestimateacelt @kalliria @cynicalricin @itsbubbaog @glittered-unicorn-lava @attentionseekingprincess

Fuck it all to hell, you had told Finn, told him so many times that you’d felt like a parrot. It was only to be him and Clarke at this meeting with Anya. Just like Anya would only bring you and her second. Of course you’d been naïve to think either of them would keep their word. Clarke had definitely brought more than just Finn and Anya had brought a whole horde of warriors.

It had been inevitable at that point that someone was going to get an itchy finger and fire without meaning to. Unfortunately, that person had been on Clarke and Finn’s side. Bullets had rained down on your people and you had all retreated back with untrusting eyes falling on you. Why had you let Finn talk you into this? You were going to pay for how badly this had all turned out.

Tris had been hit with one of those bullets and from the sickly pale colour of Anya’s second you doubted she would be recovering anytime soon. No one within your own tribe had the medical skills to heal bullet wounds. Poison and arrow’s yes, but bullets? There was a reason why you had been sent to steal the vast majority of their ammunition.

“Y/N?”

You jerked at Anya’s voice coming from behind you, turning to look into your leaders face. She looked tired and more than a little bit concerned for Tris.

“I need you to do something for me”

“What is it?”

“Scouts brought in Clarke and Finn earlier on this morning, I need you to go to the sky people’s camp. Keep that boy in the walls”

“That boy?” you asked curiously then continuing “you haven’t hurt them Anya?”

“I haven’t and I won’t as long as the girl succeeds in healing Tris” folding her arms across her chest she levelled her gaze on you, tiredness banished “You are to keep Bellamy Blake within the walls of that camp Y/N. I don’t care how you do it, but he needs to stay away”

“You don’t care how I do it?” Anya had a tone to her voice that you didn’t like, it implied something about your relationship with Bellamy that you hadn’t even admitted to yourself yet. “You sound like you have some idea about what needs doing Anya”

“Don’t try and cover up your feelings for them Y/N” her face pinched into a look of distaste. “It’s impossible to miss how you talk about them all of a sudden, your becoming more like Lincoln day after day”

“I am nothing like him”

Anya simply shrugged her shoulders “at this moment in time I don’t care what you believe, in fact your fondness for them is helping my immediate goals. Go, keep Bellamy occupied enough to leave Finn and Clarke here”

You wanted to keep pressing, to try and get some sort of guarantee out of Anya that she wouldn’t hurt Finn or Clarke. However, you knew Anya to well to think that you were going to succeed in that respect instead you would take what she had given already. “When do you want me to go?”

“Now” Anya held out your coat, the dark green one that allowed you to blend so well into the back drop of the forest. “As long as you can Y/N”

“As long as I can” you slipped into the coat flicking the hood up over your hair and doing up the buttons.

You knew that when Anya said now she meant now you didn’t bother looking back to try and get any sort of glimpse at Finn or Clarke instead simply taking off for the borders of the forest. Stealing wasn’t your only skill nor was slipping ropes. You could also move almost inhumanely fast through the forest; it was a talent you hadn’t been able to teach to anyone else. The way you jumped over the undergrowth and missed hazards around you. All of it added up to the fact that reaching the sky peoples camp would have taken others hours but took you only one.

Movement was frantic around the camp and you could see hordes of kids running around seemingly unsure of what they should do. Who you couldn’t see was Bellamy though, the one person who you were supposed to be distracting.

Distracting, that was the interesting word. What exactly was distracting Bellamy going to take and just how far were you willing to go to uphold Anya’s orders.

You stayed in the trees for a moment scouting out time in the guard’s rotation to slip through the tunnel and into the camp. From the edge of the tunnel it was easy enough to skirt around the edges of the camp and tents to towards the one you knew was Bellamy’s. You were taking a guess that that was where he might be, planning what to do next. From the outside you couldn’t hear any voices so taking the risk that he was going to be on his own you slipped inside.

Your luck apparently was holding because sure enough Bellamy was sat on the edge of his bed, head in his hands staring down at the floor. “I’m not in the mood for another lecture Clarke”

He didn’t know that Clarke had gone yet, that was good. “Then it’s a good job I’m not Clarke”

He jerked, jumping up from his bed to spin around staring over at you. “Y/N”

“In the flesh” you pushed your hood down revealing your face to him, smiling softly at his visible surprise. “Sorry for skipping out on you again, but I did promise to be back”

“What are you doing here?”

Slowly you undid the buttons of your coat dropping it to the floor as you came over to a still tense Bellamy. “You tried to kill Anya, you nearly did kill Tris”

“Tris?”

“Anya’s second. She isn’t happy”

“Do you really think that bothers me?” he snapped out anger filtering over his features as he stared down at you.

“I think it should” you took the final step towards him so your bodies were only inches apart. “I think if it honestly doesn’t than your more stupid than I thought and that’s just…disappointing”

Bellamy reached up grabbing your arms and squeezed to such an extent that it was almost painful. “I’m only going to ask you once more Y/N, what are you doing here?”

“Can I not want to see you?” his nostrils flared at that, he wanted it to be true you could see it on his face. He wanted to believe that you wanted to see him. It was interesting, it seemed that Bellamy was fighting just as hard as you were to deny that there was anything but hostility between the two of you. That the chemical pull you felt towards him didn’t actually exist. You slowly raised your hand up to rest your hand against his chest, you could feel his heart beat accelerating under your touch. “I did want to see you again Blake”

“But?”

“But that’s not the whole reason”

You’d reached a crossroads, right now in this moment your life could go one of two directions. You could do as you had been raised to protect Anya and not tell him that is was likely that Clarke and Finn were both going to die at the hands of your people. Or you could tell him the truth, you could betray your people and you could take the final step towards living a life like Lincoln lived.

“I need to know something from you before I tell you”

“Need to know what?” Bellamy’s grip loosened on your arms but he didn’t completely let go of you, almost like he was scared that you were going to vanish once more.

“Would you have killed Lincoln? If I hadn’t gotten him out of this camp. Would you have killed my friend?”

He went silent, eyes flicking down from your face to instead stare down at the floor. “No” he whispered out. “Is that what you want to hear? That your enemies are weak. That I wouldn’t have been able to kill him when it came down to the end”

“I don’t think your weak” you moved your hand up from his chest, tracing his collar bone and up his neck to lift his chin so you could stare into his eyes once more. “I don’t think mercy is weakness Bellamy. On the contrary I think it takes more courage to show forgiveness” lifting yourself up onto your toes you pressed your lips against Bellamy’s.

Unlike the first time you had kissed him Bellamy didn’t stay motionless for long. His hands went to your hips pulling your body up to his own, then wrapped around your waist. One large hand splayed out on the base of your back and the other moved up to tunnel into your hair.

Your body lit up like it was one fire, Bellamy’s touch sending shivers over your skin and made your brain vacate the premises. You barely managed to wrench yourself back under control breaking away from his lips.

“Wait Bellamy, I’m a distraction” you gasped out gripping onto his shirt. “I’m a distraction”

“A distraction?” his own eyes were still unfocused with lust as he kept you wrapped in his arms.

“Anya, she has Clarke and Finn. If Clarke can’t save her second, she’ll kill them. I’m the distraction”

Bellamy tensed but surprising you he still didn’t let go of you or try and restrain you. “Why are you telling me this?”

You bit your lip staring up at him. “Because sometimes mercy is most courageous thing you can do”

91 notes · View notes

comicteaparty · 5 years

Text

April 25th, 2019 CTP Archive

The archive for the Comic Tea Party chat that occurred on April 25th, 2019, from 5PM - 7PM PDT. The chat focused on Castoff by Star Prichard.

Featured Comment:

Chat:

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- THURSDAY BOOK CLUB START!

Good evening, everyone~! This week’s Thursday Book Club is officially beginning! Today we are discussing Castoff by Star Prichard~! (https://castoff-comic.com/)

Remember that Thursday discussions are completely freeform! However, every 30 minutes I will drop in OPTIONAL discussion questions in case you’d like a bit of a prompt. If you miss out on one of these prompts, you can find them pinned for the chat’s duration. Additionally, remember that while constructive criticism is allowed, our focus is fun and respectfully appreciating the comic. All that said, let’s begin!

QUESTION 1. What is your favorite scene in the comic so far and why?

im probably going to go with frankie's introduction. this scene fulfilled several things for me. first, it explored more of the world in a super natural way that makes complete sense to the story and gives you a better picture. second, i super love frankie. he is a great character deserving of hugs. third, i enjoy how frankie joining the party works out. it felt like so logical how everything played out despite the difficulty in getting another person to join the party naturally.

just overall though i love frankie's addition. i think his personality is a great balance to vector and arianna's personalities since both are not the friendliest of sorts since one is super shy and the other super grumpy. and i feel like frankie perfectly fits the triforce

keii4ii

That triforce analogy is great and I agree

RebelVampire

another scene i really enjoy is the one where arianna captures vector. i love the lighting on the pages because it is so ungodly ominous and really sets the mood. plus, its the first major time we get to see magic and it looks amazing (edited)

but on the frankie train, i also enjoy how he offers vector something that arianna cannot. which is knowing what its like to be feared and kind of one-of-a-kind. cause i think this makes for a beautiful friendship between the two that offers vector more emotional support in a way than arianna can't. not to mention, one of my other fave scenes is the one where vector stands up for frankie against arianna and says nah my dude, hes coming with us. that was such a significant character growth for vector that hit me right in the feels. and i think it works cause of how vector clearly empathizes with frankie, so it all ties together

mathtans

Little one seems calm in her crib now. Hiyo, and awesome to have another creator who's a teacher. ^^

RebelVampire

hi math

mathtans

I made it through 5 of the chapters. My favourites in general through that is probably the "Wait, What" moments, just because I tend to use them myself... there was the one with Zera, about Arianna's full name, and then with Arianna, who did it about Frankie coming along with them. (Also, a hint that they're related? Hmmmm.)

Zera and Arianna that is, not Arianna and Frankie.

Good point about the Frankie and Vector similarities, incidentally. I wonder if the "Frankie" name is a riff on "Frankenstein"?

There's also the fact that "Vectors" can refer to small organisms like mosquitoes that carry diseases. I feel like there's stuff going on with names.

RebelVampire

nope arianna and frankie are related now. new head canon

arianna was also a robot this whole time

mathtans

It would explain how she died.

RebelVampire

you know what, i didnt draw the connection between frankie and frankenstein

thats a good catch math

and very fitting for the character

mathtans

Though I admit my own feelings about that are Arianna's got amnesia or something, which is why she can't be tracked.

Just kinda occurred after the dramatic reveal.

Also, since I teach math, I was already suspicious of the name "vector".

RebelVampire

QUESTION 2. The comic’s central character, Vector, has many mysteries surrounding him. What exactly do you think Vector is? Why is Vector seemingly able to do powerful magic beyond any mage? Why does Vector make everyone become almost possessed and panicked, and why are Arianna and Frankie exceptions? Why do you think Vector is wanted for treason? Is Arianna right that it’s a trumped up charge to get rid of him? If so, why would Alveria want him silenced? How do you think Vector wound up with Ms. Robins? Last but not least, what might all this have to do with the prologue’s opening scene?

mathtans

I got this. Vector's the guy who was tied up in the prologue, they were trying to use him to do crazy magics... and he wasn't the first, since it's implied there's others. But with him it went wrong and the magic ended up inside him. Arianna was that girl peeking at the door when it happened, so she's okay with the crazy eye thing, and it's why they thought she died. They want Vector back to undo the magic stuff, hence "treason" in order to get everyone interested.

Also, for Vector... coo coo kachew, Ms. Robins' son, Jesus loves you more than you will know. Whoa, whoa, whoa.

RebelVampire

math no XD

i also agree at least that vector is the guy from the prologue

and he got all the magic trapped inside him

and is now super magic baby

he is the living essence of magic

and the voice hes been hearing is the soul of magic

RumSoakedChicken

^^^

mathtans

Maybe it was a big plan to try to bring magic to the other parts of the world that went very bad.

RumSoakedChicken

but perhaps the yellow eyed one recieved a part of the magic

since i bleieve there was a lot of light paths coming off

and he was the first one we meet

mathtans

Speaking of which, massive props to starting things out with the failed radio-like device at the start. To put us into the frame of mind of magic. Sets the scene real well and acts as a misdirect later when you realize it's not worldwide.

There was actually a bunch of sneaky stuff then, like the mention of "Feron" ages and ages before it came up again. (Honestly, if the creator hadn't pointed that out, I'd have missed it.)

RebelVampire

i really need to go back and examine the prologue closely.

mathtans

I meant this part: https://castoff-comic.com/comic/chapter-1-page-8/

RebelVampire

ah. that is smart. good catch in details!

actually i take my theory back. reexamining the prologue, i dont think vector was the guy tied to the chair. but i do think hes basically an aspect of pure magic. and i agree that given all the light balls coming off the event, there are probably more of vector's kind out there(edited)

but since vector is an aspect of magic, thats why he has the effect he does. like maybe yellow magic is the magic of fear

vector was a yellow lantern all along

mathtans

Oh, that's an interesting idea. I like that. Since magic is colour based in this world.

(Zera is Green Lantern?)

RebelVampire

yeah see this is just an origin of the lantern corps story.

but i think vector being an essence of magic ties in all the dots. but rather than the voice being the soul of magic, maybe its the guy who probably got killed during that event.

mathtans

So how is Arianna red if zombies are supposed to be black lanterns...

RebelVampire

though if there are more vector's, youd think theres be more wanted posters. unless vector is the only one they never found

cause shes not a zombie probably

mathtans

There was no picture of Vector since he was just a wee one at the time. And I think it was said he was the only one with no image. The others they had pictures for. So if they weren't found, they're probably in hiding.

Probably amnesia. Zombie is a fun thought though.

RebelVampire

i mean its not impossible for her to be a zombie.

mathtans

An amnesiac zombie?

RebelVampire

another point for why i love vector and frankie's relationship though, if we go through this vector is magic theory, it means he and frankie are polar opposites. making their friendship more beautiful

best of both worlds i see

i can respect that

mathtans

That's pretty cool, actually. Do you ship them?

RebelVampire

i dont think i ship vector with anyone yet cause vector has to do some character growth first.

mathtans

Fair. (I think all I can ship is Arianna and Sonja. And the latter seems to have a thing for Zera.)

I do like Arianna's nickname habit.

kayotics

Popping in late to say Arianna is my fav because I’m a sucker for angry girls

mathtans

Hi kay. Cool. She seems to have had a harsh childhood.

RebelVampire

i wonder what her nickname for zera would be

maybe raccoon

cause of the dark circles

mathtans

She seemed to know him, from Zera's mental flashback. She was saying things were his fault. So maybe "jerkface".

RebelVampire

that is also plausible

actually tbf, double plausible

cause i doubt shes gonna be happy to know hes the reason shes wanted

whereas if he had just left it alone everything would be fine

and only vector would be the wanted man

mathtans

Yeah, puts a wrench into her plans. Whatever those are.

Maybe she's trying to find out her true identity. What with the amnesia.

(I should fix this broken record.)

RebelVampire

the plot twist is zera was what she wanted to steal back all along

QUESTION 3. Besides Vector, Arianna herself has some mysteries surrounding her. Who exactly is Arianna? Is she the real Arianna Marcel, or did she steal the name? If the latter, why would she steal it? Who is the real Arianna Marcel to Zera? What do you think will happen when Zera catches up with Arianna in his quest for truth? How do you think Arianna wound up on the streets as she mentions regarding her past? What do you think Arianna is after in the capital, and why was it taken from her? Ultimately, how do you think Arianna’s quest to retrieve her stolen property will interfere with her taking care of Vector and getting him home?

arianna is probably that person whose name got covered up by the speech bubble on that one page. and i think arianna took the name out of sorrow for missing who im just gonna assume is her sister. cause she desperately wished she was the one who was dead

mathtans

All you other Arianna's are just imitating so won't the real Arianna please stand up, please stand up...

I'm not sure which name coverup you mean, but I think it is clever how the art does faded bubbles for when someone's half unconscious or when someone's talking over someone else.

I do feel like Arianna's the real one though. And that she was the one spying in the prologue, as I said.

RebelVampire

i will try to find the page im talking about

the alternate is that she is the real arianna and the one who dies was her sister. i dont discount that

given the same last name i assume siblings tho?

in regards to the relationship between zera and her

mathtans

Tempting. Could be cousins.

RebelVampire

https://castoff-comic.com/comic/chapter-5-page-11/

that page bottom right

so there is clearly someone else with the marcel named that exists or once existed

mathtans

Ahhhh! So that's the mystery sister.

(Incidentally, been reading Chapter 6 in the background here. Elves are colour-coded too... makes me wonder if it's personality based or what.)

RebelVampire

i think when zera catches up to arianna hes gonna have a my life is a lie conflict and realize that whether shes the real one or not, he was never told everything about the death. cause the death of the real or fake arianna i think has a lot to do with why she was on the streets

i did get the impression the auras were based on personality

like arianna is super angry therefore gets the red magic

i feel somewhere it was mentioned real arianna's aura was pink?

which is why i do think this arianna is the sister of the real arianna. that apparently zera didnt care about at all. for shame zera. especially cause if i knew there was another marcel id be searching for that one to make sure there were no shenanigans

mathtans

Yeah, Zera said pink. Which is close, which is why I think she was just mentally tweaked a bit. Also, Arianna's eyes do the red glow thing, and I don't think that's necessarily true of others doing casting?

Starfish

Okay I’m back from class Will have to leave again in a bit but I just caught up reading everything and I’m enjoying all the theories

mathtans

Yay class! Next comes the grading. What a life. ^.^

Starfish

Ehehe, I’m technically an assistant teacher so no grading for me~

I’m an assistant ESL teacher in Japan- my part of teaching is mostly “get the kids to practice their English” via games and stuff

mathtans

Fair enough. Didn't mean to vector us off track. ^.^ Incidentally, I originally thought that maybe Vector's power didn't work on Frankie because he only had the one eye, so the eyepatch was saving him. Until the whole metal revelation.

biab

RebelVampire

ya know tbf that was a decent theory before the metal reveal.

im sticking with our arianna being fake and think shes after something of the real arianna's. like a magic gem or something. i do think down the line arianna is gonna have to pick which is more important: the thing she was trying to get or vector. and i think shell be a good person and pick vector cause shes growing and learning its not cool to sacrifice ppl for your aims

on a side note i hope we get to meet her merc company

im interested to see them(edited)

mathtans

Maybe they have gem boasting nights out. "Mine's bigger" and all that.

RebelVampire

i hope thats true somewhere in the comic's world XD

mathtans

It might be why people are annoyed at the elves.

Heh, "Best Friends plus Arianna", nice one. Made it to Chapter 7.

RebelVampire

i found it interesting that even the elves freaked out at vector. cause the minute they appeared that was the largest question on my mind. if theyd be effected or not

QUESTION 4. Of course, there are a few other mysteries present within the story. Do you think there is any story related reason only some continents in the world have magic? Why do you think Frankie, a machine, was created? Further, what is Frankie doing in Kardia in the first place? How do you think Frankie might help or hinder Vector and Arianna getting back to Alveria, especially since he’ll be aiding criminals? Back in Alveria, why do you think General Brisse was so critical of Zera? Do you think he might know something the others don’t? Overall, what do you think will happen once the characters are back in Alveria? Who will side with who on this matter?

i do think the lack of magic might be related. but i kind of think maybe its the opposite to what was already stated. and that the ppl in the prologue were trying to monopolize magic so they could be the superior country

mathtans

I think Frankie coming to Kardia is related to his injuries. Like he escaped from his creators or something. That's why they couldn't fix him and he had to do it himself.

Hmmm, maybe there's some big magic/tech war going on in the background and only the General is in on it. The magic people are temporarily undefended what with Vector having most of the magic bottled away, hence why their shield is only around their castle and not the whole capitol, and why they want Vector back - or dead, if that would spread the magic around.

RebelVampire

i considered that as a possibility. cause usually magic and tech are at war. and weve already seen evidence that magic users think tech is dumb cause how silly of ppl to want things that magic can already do.

but also math how dare you suggest frankie has such a tragic past

hes too innocent for that

and i have to go weep in the corner for him now

frankie was probably created with not good intentions. i mean i could pretend he was meant to test the legs of tech and see how far they could go. more likely they just wanted a robot assassin

am i the only one who things brisse has something to do with arianna's death? cause he seemed really critical of what is actually a good lead to finding a criminal he super wants. and i mean it could just be the last name thing, but i still get the impression he knows something

mathtans

Aw. I feel like all the characters have tragic pasts though. And when Frankie told his story, I did wonder why he had to fix himself up... like, did he maybe even kill his creator? And repressed the memory along with the defense personality?

I think Brisse is just pretty focussed and has probably read Zera's files. I could be wrong. Though it reminds me of Terran. I like him as a secondary character. Good puns, and good plans for circumventing things that aren't technically against the rules.

RebelVampire

yes i appreciate him having a loose interpretion of what he should and shouldnt do

i hope the creator isnt dead just for the story potential tbh

for frankie

cause thats just what they need

frankie's creator showing up to say "hey frankie what up"

and frankie can be like "oh noooooo"

mathtans

Twist, Frankie's creator is a zombie.

Still thinking about side characters actually, the scene between the bookstore woman and the priest was nice. Kind of superfluous at first glance, but it gave Vector more backstory and added more to the world.

Also confirmed not-dead.

RebelVampire

yeah i was intrigued by that scene. but tbf as a character ms robins is useful cause she can give us insight into whats going on in the capital outside of the royal guard

cause surely shell see the wanted poster at some point

and go wtf

maybe even try talking to someone

get thrown in jail

tell vector if he doesnt show up theyll assume she did the treason

i took that from happy to sad

very quickly

mathtans

That's a very good point. I hadn't considered that.

Maybe she'll meet them as they're approaching the city.

RebelVampire

yeah she could also be a key ally in helping them

cause for sure i think itll be obvious to the guards at a point theyre heading back to the capital

mathtans

She does seem very overprotective. I wondered about her reaction initially, as Arianna didn't seem so bad. Then, of course, she proved to be self-serving.

RebelVampire

after they get frankie his own wanted poster

mathtans

Wanted... for cuddling.

RebelVampire

wanted for being a great dude

mathtans

One other thing I want to mention before we wrap up is I dig the art style on the characters. I'm not quite sure what it is, the larger eyes or the hairstyles or some mix? But I like it.

Just don't get Frankie wet. He's like a gremlin.

RebelVampire

yeah i really love the art style as well. although what sells it for me is the magic. that magic circle in the prologue was beautiful with how it glowed and made me eager to see more of the magic.

but i might just be a sucker for magic circles

before we close out i do want to say i think zera will join forces with the main trio at some point

mathtans

Oh, I dig magic circles too. Big Nanoha junkie over here.

RebelVampire

cause zera does not seem like someone whod look at shady stuff going on and be like "im ok with this"

mathtans

Zera does seem to have a conscience. I think they'll butt heads first though.

RebelVampire

oh for sure

i hope terran finds something interesting in zera's file

like zera has a side career as a juggler once

mathtans

He finds... a magic square!

(Hey, if colours can vary, why not shapes. )

RebelVampire

ya know what, despite that being a joke thatd be very interesting

COMIC TEA PARTY- THURSDAY BOOK CLUB END!

Sadly, this wraps up this week’s Thursday Book Club chat for now. Thank you so much to everyone for reading and joining us! We want to give a special thank you to Star Prichard, as well, for making Castoff. If you liked the comic, make sure to support Star Prichard’s efforts however you’re able to~!

Read and Comment: https://castoff-comic.com/

Star’s Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/castoff

Castoff’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/CastoffComic

#ctparchive #comics #webcomics #indie comics #comic chat #comic discussion #book club #bookclub #webcomic book club #webcomic bookclub #comic tea party #ctp #castoff #star prichard

0 notes

lycanrox · 7 years

Text

response to aidens post lol

Thanks for forcing me into a relationship and making me fall for you because of your temporary affection if-Tearing me apart internally when I KNEW I was not good enough, when I KNEW we were not going to last because you always had someone better. You gave me false hope and tore me up and used my body just for you to help you out. gonna copy nd paste then post my response ok cool

-Guilt trip and gaslight when you thought I was going to get with someone else, people making compliments towards me got you into a rage fit. You never apologized for always getting pissed when I never did shit and you take compliments all the time.

i never tried to guilt trip. i told you many times its ok to get with someone else. you literally dated someone else and i was ok with it. it wasnt compliments i was upset over, you literally had people saying they were in love with you. thats really weird to me. i was scared to be abandoned. people dont compliment me, all i have is my boyfriend and my qpp. maybe my close friends compliment me but its not a big deal. did i freak out over ur friends calling u daddy and shit? why should u get upset over people doing that to me?

-Manipulating everyone to know only your side, ignoring my sincere apologies, calling them bullshit, ignoring the fact that I never did those things again and told you to call me out. You barely did, but I did always stop when you told me to.

literally i already said. He sat there with me as youd text me and fight with me. you went to Her, my fp, to complain about me without telling her my side. everyone who ive talked to has seen all of it. i give people my phone and let them read everything since even before we broke up. im not scared to show my side.

-Controlling me, telling me to do everything and give you love all the time and you literally did that all the time. “I hate myself I want to die”, was that not manipulation, when I always try to comfort you? But, you pushed me away and said you never asked. I was extremely supportive in your times of misery and self harm, what have you ever done for me?

how did i control you? i didnt tell you to do shit. saying “love me” as a joke isnt controlling. i wanted attention, god forbid. you do the same to me. “i hate myself i want to die” is literally just me self loathing, how is that manipulation??? i was venting to you because i trust you. i appreciated the comfort but yes i never wanted help. help is not what i want, i dont want to be in the hospital, i dont want to be put on new meds, i dont want a support group i just want to feel less alone.

-Calling me abusive for literally nothing, for “months” I have apparently abused you when A) I never fucking harmed you, a gentle push I guess which I thoroughly apologized for, but nah it’s all bullshit according to you and B) You have done manipulative and abusive things to me like: Forcing me to do things with you, making me have to kiss you within the first 5 days because you were so sad, trying to talk sexually to me when I was not ready but I got into it because that is what YOU wanted, exhausting my limits to how much you wanted from me, expecting me to love on you and care for you when you are always talking about how many feelings you have for someone else, putting me into a poly relationship without my consent the second time, always having some shit to complain about because I cannot be perfect, pinning me against my friends, and the list goes on.

if like 10 different people are calling you abusive its probably true, dude. you did harm me. you ignored the fact i literally said you punched me. you never apologized for that. i was fucking upset over it and you just sat there and watchd me tear up and curl in a ball. you tried to fucking excuse yourself for it. “I deal with things irrationally, I live in a family that physically hits each other, and it was a blur I cannot just stop and think. I did not blame him for being scared? I said it isn’t my fault and it doesn’t mean I havent gone through things either.” literal quote from you. “...it was aggressive but gentle...” another literal quote.

i never forced you to. in fact it was always you texting me about how horny you are, you made an nsfw blog so i could see the shit you put on there, you were the first person to make sexual advances. i told you i get sex repulsed sometimes and you apparently dont even remember that because at least 3 times a week you talked to me about being horny and what was i supposed to do? you would be at my house and tell me how much you wanted to fuck, you said literally “i cant wait for after-prom sex” and i didnt let you stay the night because of that. you were the one who always wanted sex. i never forced you to do anything, you were the one who touched me without consent. i didnt make you kiss me. before we were even dating you talked about kissing me all the time. you asked me to teach you how to kiss, so yeah like .. 5 days after we started dating you spent the night and we kissed like 3 times. it wasnt that big of a deal. you asked for it. the first time we sexually talked all i said was i wanted to give you hickeys and you asked to sext, so we did.

poly relationship w/o consent? when we first started dating i was already dating oliver. when we broke up, again, i was dating oliver so when you ASKED ME OUT again you knew i was still with them. no force. when did i ever pin you against your friends? the only person i ever said shit abt was p**** because he was getting too obsessive when you were uncomfy, and you encouraged me to do that.

-You made me believe that all I was ever doing was WRONG, and I have told you that five trillion times, and you never did anything to help that. I know I was not wrong for trying to be supportive even though I was triggered to death, but you made me feel like I was a fucking nuisance in your life.

how??? i did everything i could to tell you how great of a boyfriend you were. i told you every day how much i loved you. how perfect you were. i didnt do shit, you were the one who made me feel like shit every day because i wasnt physically or mentally able to suit your romantic needs.

-Blaming me for all your damn mistakes, I got defensive because it was never me, blaming me for being paranoid when you did things and hinted at things to provoke that, and your paranoia was never apologized for either. Even in the beginning, I apologized for being paranoid and it took a long ass time for that to come back because you are so unpredictable and you were never clear with any of the things you said.

yes i admit i have trouble owning up to my own mistakes. im sorry that i blamed you for things. you dont deserve that. im mature enough to own up and apologize for that. i dont know what i did to make you paranoid but im sorry that that happened. i am unpredictable. i know. yikes at me

-Vaguely saying you did some things wrong too but hiding behind your illnesses as well, not even asking me what you could have done better. You want the cold hard truth? You are getting it. Yes, I was supportive of what you had and I guess I am ableist for trying to help you to change. I WAS SO ABLEIST for wanting the absolute bare minimum. You already said we were just becoming friends at that stage, and the fact of the matter is, you hurt the shit out of me.

i try not to hide behind my illnesses but i really cant help some things because of my illnesses. i tried asking what i could do. i tried doing what you wanted. you are ableist tbqh because i told you i COULDNT DO THE THINGS YOU WANTED but you pushed me every day to fucking do it and when i broke down and apoligzed for not being able to do it you made me feel like ABSOLUTE SHIT!!! i was the worst bf ever bc i cant do some romantic things sometimes!!!!! yikes im so problematic for being disabled!!

-You become avoidant to self harm and don’t fucking apologize for pushing people away. You always told me you were here for me when I needed help but you never actually listened to me. I never jumped straight into things, sorry if you believe that. I always said I was feeling terrible and you decided to expand.

i dont have to apologize for pushing people away if its whats best for me mentally. i am 100% sure in that. i always ask whats wrong because i care about you but when i dont know what youre going to say its a 50/50 chance ill get triggered and if im triggered i cant really think properly!! i get flashbacks and anxiety attacks when i see even specfic words. ive told you before its not great to depend on me for that stuff. that im always here for you but im here to listen, not to help. i cant help myself, how can i help you?

-Saying you were fine all the time, lying to me when something was wrong, I always had to find out from someone else about what you have done.

wow yikes i didnt tell you when i felt shitty because i didnt want to trigger you. yikes because i dont want your help or advice sometimes. i want people to listen but you never JSUT listen you have some styff to say and while some ppl like that i dont!! i dont like being told how to think or feel or what to do

-Abusing your medications and getting high when I first broke up with you, saying you got dumped, implying you didn’t deserve it when you never deserved me. I spent over $200 dollars on your boyfriend’s medical bills, but I am careless and unkind I suppose.

i was already abusing my medications :-/ i never called you careless or unkind but ok

-Tearing me apart internally when I KNEW I was not good enough, when I KNEW we were not going to last because you always had someone better. You gave me false hope and tore me up and used my body just for you to help you out.

what did i ever do to make you feel not good enough lol. not do the things i said before i cant do? i didnt use your body, not once not ever. dont even start that shit. you know my history of rape and sexual abuse. what the actual fuck.

-Again, since you cannot get it through your selfish mind, you never owned up for ANYTHING you have done, and guess what? I only do what people do to me. So, you treating me bad, I tried to forgive you and become collected, but you pushed me to where I thought I was stuck in the relationship. Why? Because if I left, you would become suicidal, if you left, you would want to come back immediately.

i tried owning up to things and ive apologized for many things i shouldnt have had to. tbqh ive wanted to break up since like.. right after prom bc the way you were being so i wouldnt have been suicidal if you left. yeah i wouldve been upset if i left because its hard for me to detach myself from people

You have no idea what you did, you have no idea what you were doing.

lol u rite

People defending your disgusting actions are no better than you are, you only exclude what you have done to make yourself seem innocent.

people excusing you for hitting me and sexually abusing me and manipulating and gaslighting me are worse than people supporting me. i was maybe bad to you to combat myself from you hurting me!! i dont want to fucking get hurt again so when you do something shitty i have to do something shitty in return!

Thanks for forcing me into a relationship and making me fall for you because of your temporary affection

you asked me out both times.

I asked you all the damn time if you wanted space, but you said “No, it’s fine,” when you damn well knew it wasn’t. Why are you such a blatant liar?

i didnt want to hurt you by leaving you alone.

Oh and also, when you “broke up” with your boyfriend of two years for me, but always texting endearing things to them when we were together, how cute of you to do that.

we did break up. yeah i fucking missed them though. its hard for me to detach. but i wasnt seeing them behind your back. you know very well it was sho who was dating oliver, not me. i text them endearing things because theyre my fp/dp and i love them.

anything abusive ive done i literally didnt mean to do. youre the one whos just now pushing all this shit on me. dont accuse me of being abusive when you didnt tell me when these things made you upset. i didnt fucking know. i cant read minds. i cant do any of that shit. i also dont have empathy and cant think of other peoples emotions so its hard for me to think about how/if my actions are affecting people, unless they fuckign tell me. which you didnt. instead, you just told me how fucking shitty i was. i was an awful boyfriend, im using you, im cheating, im not good enough, i cant satisfy you. i guess i was so bad you just had to start dating that other guy, and as you said, because “he can give you things i cannot give”. jeez im so FUCKING sorry.

#self harm 0542 #abuse 35959 #rape 43592 #ask to tag

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johnnythirteenguns · 7 years

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logan, not spoiler free thoughts (it got long):

anyways i saw logan yesterday and im still sensitive from it and i wouldnt know where to begin having a conversation about it with people who want to see it

as a film it’s pretty good. i didnt feel too much time was wasted, if any really, it’s tropey though. so like once it gets going it is point a to b to c to d with no variation and you spot the chekov’s guns right away and you can figure out how it’s going to end half way in. which im fine with as long a movie doesnt patronize me, and i didnt feel logan did. it was just formulaic. but it was good and watchable. there is a lot to be said for exploiting a tried and true formula for story telling but fitting it to the aesthetic of the characters therein.

also although i dont talk to movies i have realized that i am increasingly more involved with reacting to them and i dont know if this means i am more empathetic with the characters on screen because i am becoming more empathetic or if im more emotional and have nowhere to direct that emotion in my real life so i put it all into relating with the characters on a given screen and so when stuff happens to them i just really React.

that being said like im really. tired. of white characters being allowed to use brown bodies as stepping stones and footstools. there are a lot of dead brown people in this film. the main characters are all white. although dafne did an admirable job as laura, if i had the chance id recast her immediately. i wouldnt have cast her at all to be honest. i hope that when an older or adult laura shows up that they cast an actual mexican actress (not a white one). in logan they imply that the babies are clones, but there’s also implication that it was actually just in-vitro using the stolen dna the way you would use donated sperm? unless i watch it again i wont know because the language seemed unsure of itself.

but yeah. i dont. know. it’s literally too much at this point like we’re just constantly thrown under the bus so to save, create, or help white characters. for example, you know the horse family is gonna die, you know it because it’s a Trope. but it’s a black family, and they die gruesomely, which okay, everyone that dies in logan dies gruesomely and violently. but theyre the only black characters with speaking parts, and there is a dearth of them elsewhere in the fox marvel universe. rictor, one of the escaped 23s, is mexican in the comics, apparently so in the movie, and i can safely assume his actor is latinx as well (but he’s a baby and so doesnt have a ton of stuff on his imdb). he’s also the only one of the kids who is shot when they’re being chased through the woods.

i honestly dont know if i would have preferred they keep it on screen or leave it off screen. clearly brown children are afterthoughts anyway? to be used as plot devices and target dummies as needed. i dont know. i do know that i was waiting for it and i thought he was going to die. they do have a line of dialogue immediately after rictor is shot to reassure you that he isnt going to die, which is something i guess.

at any rate i really cant with child death or child abuse in media lately. i dont know how i feel about laura’s self-harm scene. not good but self-harm in media in general needs to be looked at in a case by case basis i dont know about this one.

which btw wow the actress that plays gabriela is straight up from the bronx born and raised in new york and i knew she couldnt be a primarily spanish speaker that accent grated on my ears so badly i would have preferred they find a way to have her speak spanish and english at some point to illustrate their point because whenever she spoke that accent made me desperately wish she would shut the fuck up or get to the end off her sentence if i could somehow physically share how fucking tired i am of fake mexican accents like youd faint for ten seconds from the force of my anger.

like of all the things to be that angry about but it’s honestly just One More Thing at the point and im so tired.

im really over the disposability of brown bodies and i wish it would stop.

all that being said ive been listening to this podcast and my love for the x-men and x-men adjacent characters has grown immensely over the last year and going in i was emotional about film history, about the x-men cinematic history (honestly hugh jackman has brought his a-game every time when playing logan and i thank him, even when the films themselves were lackluster), i was emotional about x-men comics history, like. i really loved how they all chose to portray the characters and the relationships between them and it was really hitting a lot of perfect notes like.

it turns into a really rough father daughter story really quickly and it got to me because of my own father, because of my possible future, it was a lot of deeply personal levels being affected. um, there’s a lot of symbolic stand-in stuff, like the canadian border, brown children crossing it alone (all their caregivers are implied to be dead to the point that they pretty much are dead due to their absence, so more dead disappeared mexican women, along with the dead teenage girls we’re told about much earlier).

i think i may have just gotten too sucked into it and too emotionally invested and am maybe looking at it through too much of a like film student lens because i was studying it for form and execution obviously and i dont feel like tropey is bad, and i say this because there were moments where most of the audience was laughing but they werent particularly funny? like haha funny moments they were a little more light-hearted (and i mean a Little, not much, to me they illuminate how very tired and hopeless logan is in comparison with other characters and the rest of the world) but because the rest of logan is couched so firmly in the same sort of world weary americana (despite none of the main characters being american, which is neither here nor there) that a film like hell or high water is that i didnt find them Funny. theyre still painful moments meant to illustrate a turning point in the characters’ relationship.

i do say this as someone who at this point just completely started crying for the rest of the movie. i was holding it back since close to the beginning because i Do like these kinds of films and stories and so im already primed to get really invested and then it just kept hitting me and. even gabriela running away with laura and how desperate but fierce they as the characters being in that situation really got me.

also there is no stinger scene so dont wait unless you want to listen to the man comes around which i love so i was fine with waiting anyway. also you see a special thanks given to all the comics creators that had a major hand in shaping laura kinney which got me and marjorie liu is listed.

#i dont know why it's telling me disposability isnt a word?

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jonghyyn · 7 years

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iyo when you write non-straight characters should you specify their sexuality/gender? I mean I'm personally a very 'not into labels at all' person for my own sexuality but support ppl who do find comfort in labels. but when I write I also tend to go toward the 'he just loves who he loves !!!' that sounded stupid but idk how to explain it.. so... like I was wondering why you feel strongly about explicitly stating someone's queerness instead of it being implied (at least u come off as that sorta)

i do definitely feel like that so!! i happen to have a lot of feelings about this so get ready for a Long Ramble. this is a precaution before ive even started typing i just know im gonna write a lot

i think before we start saying anything, we’ve got to acknowledge the difference between people who say that they dont like labels, and writing characters who Don’t Like Labels™. pointing out the problems of the latter is not a condemnation of the former. if someone rly doesnt feel like labeling their sexuality or gender, thats totally alright. the difference between these two is the person is a nuanced, multifaceted human being who may have lots of personal reasons for feeling that way, while the second is a fictional character that is Created and informed by cultural views of the creator. a person is not “created” by one single author and characters arent like…real living agents that have their Own Free Will, they are what their creators make of them. anyway i just feel like this is a rly important distinction that gets lost often!! i’m also more willing to look favorably on someone who self describes that way writing characters based on their own experiences, bc this perspective is inherently different from a straight person writing these sorts of characters. but moving on.

whats also important to understand, beyond writing characters, is how being openly not straight is shunned. queer people are not allowed to Exist as openly queer and they have not been allowed historically. even these days among people who consider themselves progressive, you’ll often hear that “its alright if someone is gay but do they have to shove it in my face all the time.” this attitude isnt somehow formed in vacuum, but created in a society that treats been openly queer as a taboo. we aren’t allowed to be open about our sexualities the way straight people are. we can’t acknowledge that we’re queer lest someone tells us to Stop Shoving It In Their Face (not missing the irony as we’re surrounded by 400 billboards of hetero couples everywhere). i dont wan’t to delve into other aspects of discrimination and get too off track here, i just want to focus on how being Openly queer is treated as a taboo, particularly among people who still want to call themselves ‘accepting.’ the only way society allows queer people to exist is if they never remind anyone, Ever that they are not straight.

this is Integral to understanding why the i Don’t Like Labels characters are so frustrating. the unwillingness to Explicitly talk about queer people carries over quite handily to media. the same faux progressive people that demand queer people never talk about being queer bc its Too Much Information, will praise queer coded characters that hint at their sexuality but never confirm it. the reason these characters are written is not to genuinely explore why someone might feel uncomfortable with applying labels to themselves, but to appease people who will accept queerness as long as they never have to acknowledge it. this way, u can court queer people interested in representation And people who might like the story but will be uncomfortable with explicit queerness. its an attempt for writers to cash in on peoples desires for interesting queer characters without ever actually fully committing to representing them. you dont get to claim to support queer people if ur also out there providing comfort for peoples homophobia. you cant have a foot in both doors.

describing queer experiences without calling them queer means that youre okay with this story as long as u dont acknowledge it as something Explicitly not straight and like…why?? why is it suddenly not okay when u take that bundle of experiences and use the word that theyre defining?? theres Weight behind using words like bi, gay, lesbian and if u reject them are u Really okay with lgbtq people? or are you okay with them Despite the fact that theyre lgbtq and not because you take into account theyre lgbtq. acceptance is not tolerating people Despite something, its acknowledging it and validating it as an okay thing to be. especially when it is something that historically Not been validated as okay. dismantling structural systems of queerphobia does not go about by ignoring queerphobia…shit this doesnt just fade away by chance, it takes active work. and part of this active work is Acknowledging Peoples Queerness As Something that is okay Out In The Open. the You in this isnt directed at you anon, just people who have these sentiments.

throwing vague statements like ‘they just love who they love’ Also creates this level of ambiguity. you might say “well why do u need the certainty when ur describing what is at the very least, something obviously very not straight” and to that i say youd be fucking surprised at how goddamn hard straight people will try to erase the queerness out of a character. like i’m going to use a game called life is strange as a example. i’ll give some background: in the game, the main character max can romance both chloe and warren. note that max is not one of those blank state wholly customisable bioware-esque player characters, she has a personality outside of the choices u make. anyway, the conclusion that is Logically drawn from this is that she is most likely bisexual. or at the very least in some way, not straight. and Yet i have seen discussions that say “she doesnt have a set sexuality it just depends on the playthrough so shes not rly a Queer Character.” even more than that, ive seen people that saw “well even in the chloe one shes not necessarily gay or bi maybe shes just Making an Exception for chloe bc their relationship transcends sexuality” and like ??? Why??? why cant she just be bi?? even when given a queer romance, why do u try and interpret it in a way that sets her up as straight?? ive seen people say “its not a romance its just something that Transcends Words” as if this is… mutually exclusive from being a romance. like… Why doesnt this happen when hetero relationships are depicted?? ive literally never seen someone say “u know, maybe hes not attracted to women and just Making an Exception so hes not straight” why dont u see people try to erase the romance aspect out of hetero romances by claiming their relationship is “Beyond Words.” this treatment is 1000% only ever afforded to queer characters. this attempt to play off romance as not rly romantic is only done to queer characters, even if its done subconsciously. people will Refuse to accept a character is queer as fuck if you dodge around it, because heteronormativity is so ingrained in every interaction that even obviously queer characters get filtered through this lens. the problem with this isnt necessarily apparent until u look at it within historical context, where queer people are repeatedly not allowed to be openly queer. these arent isolated incidents, but manifestations of the idea that queer people shouldnt ever be open about their sexuality. youve got to tackle the discomfort that people have with words like gay/lesbian/bi/etc

i think this particular character trope wouldnt bother me so much if it wasnt like… the only narrative ever present. time and time again, i have to see characters proclaim that they dont like labels while never once even hearing people breathe the word bisexual. if it existed alongside characters who were explicitly queer it would be less frustrating But its literally one of the few ways (semi positive attempts at least) queer characters are ever portrayed. this is particularly true for bisexual characters lmao like… yes…theres people who dont like labels…but theres also millions of bi people that just wanna see a fucking bi character Talk about being bi and all we ever get is a vague “i dont like labels” (that is often never explored further than that and treated as a throwaway line anyway). is creating characters who say that a genuine attempt to characterize someones struggles with labels or is it just a way to avoid saying the word Bisexual.

same with queer romance in media. its only ever Okay if u just hint at it- see dumbledore being gay. see- the korrasami thing (though i dont fault the writers for this bc they pushed hard for what they got, its issues with the network). why are queer people relegated to drawn out stares that May imply something while straight characters are allowed to get into explicit relationships. when u create ambiguous characters that May be interpreted as straight (even if youve really gotta stretch) ur prefer to maintain the negative “neutral” of the heteronormative status quo and allow homophobes to live with their views unchallenged more than u care about addressing queerness in characters.

its not a coincidence that we dont do this to straight romance or straight characters. this is particularly important for queer kids!! its good to see queer characters out there being openly queer. while me and u can often pick up on queer themes and narratives, a 8 year old is not going to get that. especially when theyve been conditioned to see straight romance as the only feasible choice. they wont realize the character youre writing is gay or bi or whatever Because they havent been exposed to the connotations we associate w certain phrases. its so important for queer kids to see queer characters Owning that theyre queer. its especially importantly to normalize words like gay or bi or pan. being gay is often Extremely hypersexualized (which is why so many people will tell u they dont care what u do in the bedroom bc they can only picture queerness is a sexual context) so when u Dont treat these words as things only adults can say, u help get rid of the stigma surrounding them. u help remove the idea that being queer is inappropriate for kids to hear about and that the only possible aspect to being queer is sexual.

anyway this has been Quite the Ramble but the point is that yes, we need to write more characters who are absolutely explicit about their sexuality and move away from the expectation that queer people need to create euphemisms to comfort homophobes desires to never hear about queerness.

#LONG POST #VERY LONG POST #man...u rly got me going #theres a lot of reasons why labels are important in the first place but man this is truly long enough as this is #i hope i didnt get too rambly and my point still stands i try to stop myself from going off on tangents #anon #ask

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