#save me morally gray circe | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

arandompostarchive · 3 years

Text

SALEM - Ch. 20

SAVED WORK

Summary: In all the centuries of your existence, you had never been dragged out of hiding by another god, put in a superhero team and forced to save the universe. But it seems your luck has run out.

_____________

***

You slammed the door open, covered in the blood of the townspeople after you had left Y/n go. You had walked back through town and quickly realized you didn’t see your father there.

Maybe he got a conscious and decided to leave, you thought. But you also knew that your father had no morals. He was planning to burn you for weeks now, why would he change his mind at the last moment. So, you stalked toward his house, your dress burned and soaked with blood.

Your shoes had holes in them, you could feel how the leather had shrunk and curled in the burning wood. Your underskirt was only knee-length now, and the blood was slowly drying against your legs, making walking a less than comfortable experience.

The fact that your father lived close to the center of town was one of the small mercies you felt that day. You knocked slowly at the door, waiting for your father to answer. He opened the door slowly, a piece of tobacco in his mouth.

You always thought you looked more like your mother, from the small portrait your father kept of her and the few memories you had retained of her image. Her skin was closer to yours, her eyes the same shape, her face structure seemed to match yours as well. Your father, on the other hand, was different. His skin was lighter than yours, his straight gray hair fell down from under a cap he wore almost every day. He worked in the courthouse, presenting cases, and because of that hadn’t seen a drop of sun in years. His eyes were sunken into his head. They always were, but now the dark bags underneath them seemed more prominent. Wrinkles scattered his skin, making him look much older than he was. You were sure there was a freckle or two on his cheeks, but you never got a close look. It’s not like the two of you had ever gotten to spend quality time together. A small, loving part of you was sad that you never would. The rest of you, however, was prepared to splatter the walls of your home—no, his home— with his blood.

His eyes widened when he saw you. He took a step back, tripping over something behind him and losing his footing. He didn’t get up at first, choosing to stare blankly at your figure.

“What the hell?” The question was so quiet under his breath that you almost didn’t hear it. The tobacco hug on the edge of his lip, threatening to fall at any moment. He pulled himself up on a nearby chair, composing himself and dusting off his shirt. He spit the tobacco on the floor next to him. You cringed, remembering how you’d had to clean it many nights whenever he went to bed. Otherwise, your entire home would stink of it and the smell made you nauseous.

“You’re driving yourself to madness, Charles. Circe is dead, nothing but cinders. Let her be and the specter will go. He whispered. “She is just a vision, a reminder of your sins.” He mumbled other words under his breath, but you didn’t care about what he had to say. Not unless it was an apology, and even then, you still planned for his blood to run along the floor panels. You walked in the room, letting him rant quietly to himself. It seemed he had gotten fairly unstable in the time you’d been imprisoned.

“I’m far from dead, Father.” You began, “In fact, I doubt I have ever felt more alive than I do now.” Your newfound abilities had caused your eyes to darken. Of course, you weren’t aware of this at the time, but your father was terrified of the black veins spreading out from your eyes, pulsing as you let smoke roll down your hands. He saw small dots within your eyes, ones he had seen only once on the face of his wife. He thought they were beautiful, now he feared them.

The feeling was beautiful. The pure power coursing through your veins. You had never felt anything so addicting. It was like your body was reborn. Like the fire had burned away everything that was holding you back. You grinned at it, the grin of a psychopath holding their first blade.

“You’re dead, Circe, dead. You burned by the hands of the townsfolk, my own friends and blood.” You scoffed at his exclamation.

“You did not witness this. You did not bother to even stay.” You move closer to him and shut the door behind you. There were people who hadn’t gone to the burnings. You were sure none of them would come out of their homes no matter what screams they heard, but you weren’t about to kill innocents. You couldn’t be sure if those people were involved in Y/n’s death.

He didn’t respond to your accusation. Instead of looking around the room, likely trying to find some exit or a weapon of some sort. You knew this house, though. The closest thing to a weapon was the pans you used to cook, and the only exit the door behind you. Or the windows, if absolutely necessary.

“You did not help me. You did not help her. And believe me, father… you will regret that decision.” Your words came out harshly as if the weapons were the torture you intended to give him. Luckily, you planned to do much worse than that. Well, it was lucky for you, not for him.

You took a few fast steps, wrapping your hand tight against his throat and bringing him to the nearest wall, pinning him there. A few days ago, lifting a full-grown man would’ve taken great effort, but now, it felt more like carrying a basket.

You marveled at the feeling of him moving under your skin, trying to reach your hand. The strangled noises he made were music. Especially since you’d been waiting to hear them for so long. The sounds of his pain. A few months ago you would’ve frowned at this, found the violence disgusting. But after all you’d been through? You felt it wasn’t enough.

“Say it.” You said, your voice soft and calm, which was scarier than you yelling. He said something from under your hand. The grip on his throat made his words sound more like jumbled noises, but you swore he asked you what you meant. You only sighed. “Give me a full apology. You did nothing while me and my closest friend when we were faced with a murder charge. You know damn well I wouldn’t use my powers in the town and she was perfectly innocent. She had done nothing and you let her burn with all the other women. And you call yourself a ‘man of god’.” You questioned, letting your disgust seep into your words. He marries a goddess, yet still insisted on being a man of the church.

You let him fall down the wall, still keeping your hand against his throat, though it was loose enough for him to speak. “I’m sorry, Circe. I’m your father, please. Have some mercy!” You could feel his tears against your hand. You’d never seen him cry, this felt like an accomplishment.

“Did you show me mercy?” You asked. He slowly shook his head.

“Please, you are my flesh and blood! I never wanted to harm you. Release me, we can talk. Please.” You rolled your eyes. He felt no remorse. He was just a sniveling coward who wanted to live.

“You feel nothing. You could have helped me and you made no effort. I hope you suffer in Tartarus.”

You gripped his throat tightly once again, drowning out whatever cries of apology he had left to offer. Using the hand on his throat for support, you gripped his right arm, ripping it clean off. You felt someone behind you. Not a human, far from human. The smallest part of your mind hoped it was Loki, it felt godly enough. You switched your arms, momentarily letting him catch a breath. Then you ripped off his other arm, his blood splattering on your clothes. Your underskirt now looked more red with splashes of white than the other way around. You didn’t mind it.

You removed your hand from his throat, letting his screams echo in the small house. He fell before you, rolling in agony. You only laughed. You put your foot on his chest, holding him in place. His screams quieted to whimpers as he stared up at you, too in pain to speak.

“Say hello to Mother for me.” You said, pushing down hard on his chest. You heard him scream and felt bones break beneath your foot. You raised your foot again, this time driving what was left of your heel through his chest, your foot embedded in the open, blood-filled cavity. You slowly took your foot out. Your heel had gotten caught on something or other, so you pulled your foot out without the shoe. You were left in a tattered underdress, dripping with blood, your stockings burned away to nothing and one shoe. You turned around to face whoever was watching you. Praying it was Loki. Hoping he wouldn’t hate you now. Wouldn’t think you were a disgusting monster with black, pulsing eyes. You were something out of a nightmare.

Instead, you were met with an odd-looking woman. You tried not to let her see your shoulders sink. She laughed, you weren’t sure if it was at you or with you.

“Not bad, that man deserved it, believe me. If I’m not wrong, you’re one of us now, yes?” Her voice reminded you of blood splashed on walls. The blood that coated the floors beneath you. It felt like she should be accompanied by screams. “Follow me.” She opened up what looked like a black hole in your house. It was a large rectangle, like a door, but there was nothing but darkness in it.

“What’s going on?” You asked, accepting that this was just another part of your day.

“I was called here because of how you were killing that mortal. But I recognize you, you’re a god now. Your mortal half burned. Now, it’s time for a family reunion.” She beckoned you forward. You were still completely lost, but at this rate, anything goes. You walked across the room, standing next to her, prepared to walk into the dark abyss before you.

“What’s your name?” You asked, not even turning to look at her. She laughed. It was an odd sound. It felt entirely unused. Like she had never let a genuine laugh out of her lips. I reminded you of swords sharpening and axes swinging. Like a million screams from the depths.

“Ker, darling.”

***

You had a plan.

Not a good plan, mind you, but it was a plan.

Jump down, drag Moros away from the console by his neck, and use one of the countless weapons covering the ground (wall? The ship was basically on its side at this point) and stab him one more time for good measure.

Unfortunately for you, the window wasn’t able to support you and Moros both jumping on it. Maybe it was the giant axe that had cracked it?

Looking back, you probably could’ve been smarter about that. But, hey. It’s not like you were known for your well thought out plans.

There was air rushing past you, Moros’ neck still in your hand. You were pretty high up, but that didn’t mean you had as much time as you liked.

Moros was saying something, but your tight grip on his neck was cutting off his airflow. It wasn’t just the two of you in the air though. There were a few bodies that had fallen when the ship had tilted, as well as weapons from fallen soldiers. You spotted a dagger falling with you. It was above you, but with a little stretch, you reached it.

You looked down at Moros, his face stoic and calm. He had accepted his death the moment he tilted the ship. That, you could respect.

“I gave you a chance, Brother. No one can say I didn’t.” You said. You gripped the dagger in your hand, more than eager to end your fight. You pressed it into his skin, drawing blood beneath it. You could see his eyes slightly widen, perhaps he was expecting something quicker.

You didn’t like murder. You didn’t like the idea of killing people who didn’t need to be killed. But you would be lying if you said you weren’t slightly relieved to be rid of Moros.

With some force, you drove the dagger fully into his neck, completely cutting through it. You cut fully through the left side of his neck, leaving only a small amount of muscle attached on the right side. His head was now loosely attached, only holding on by the thin skin and muscle still attached to his body. You didn’t bother staring too long. You were sure you’d have to apologize to your mother for killing two of your siblings, she might not be too happy about that.

Now that you had tossed your brother aside, content with his current state, you could focus on the low-level terror of plummeting through the sky. Now you felt the cool air against your open skin, something you were learning to hate. You tried your best to summon a spell of any kind, just to fly or save yourself. But you were weaker than you’d like to admit. Most of your abilities were going toward not passing out, so you simply waited.

Part of you was concerned. In all fairness, you were falling from gods know how high on the streets of New York City. The other part was praying that Tony was still paying attention.

You looked above you toward the ship and saw it slowly tilting back to its rightful position. You smiled, thankful that Thor, Loki, and Mios had gotten through the numerous bodies and weapons around them to set the ship back to the correct position.

You could see things falling around you, and you figured now was probably the time to try and find something to help you. Through the mess of swords, you spotted one of Tony’s coms. Using a small amount of your magic, you brought it over to you. You put it in your ear before shouting over the wind.

“Hello?!” You screamed. “Don’t really have much time here!” You heard static over it, but someone responded.

“Kid? What the hell is happening up there?” You recognized Tony’s voice. Usually, you would’ve found time to yell at him for calling you a kid, but you could do that later. Assuming there was a later.

“I doubt I’ll be able to talk for a good while after this, I’ll be pretty injured. Not looking forward to it.” You had no idea how high you were at this point, it just felt like a huge rush of air. But you were slowly realizing that you were much higher than you thought.

“What are you talking about?”

“I’m kinda falling here, Tony. I can see you from here. I think that’s you at least. You’re way too far, so don’t bother. I’ll be okay, it’ll just take a long time to heal.”

“Falling? Out of the ship? What the hell?”

“Tony. I’m fine. We killed Moros. You need to go make sure Loki and Thor are alright. Don’t come find me until later, make sure you can save as many people as possible, even soldiers. I’ll be fine.”

“Listen, Queenie, where are you.”

“Queenie?”

“Well, you are kinda ordering me around right now.”

You laughed a bit, “I like that one.”

“…I guess we’ll keep it then.”

You were almost sure you heard Tony say something after that, but it was drowned out by static. You pulled the com from your ear, cursing when you saw it was your broken one. Of course, it was.

You sighed and closed your eyes. You could still feel the injury in your chest, liquid still coating the suit Tony had made you. You’d remember to apologize later, you were a bit busy at the moment. You waited to feel either the crash of the sidewalk. In all probability, you’d survive the fall, although you’d certainly have some nasty damage left over. But still, this kind of fall? You could expect weeks of pain, something you were very interested in avoiding.

You kept your arms wrapped tight around yourself. If you didn’t know you might be falling thousands of feet into the sidewalk, you would actually enjoy the intense wind brushing against your face.

Until you felt the wind quickly stop around you. Still, you kept your eyes shut tight. And then you felt it below you: solid ground. Well, perhaps ‘ground’ wasn’t the right word. You were sitting down on some sort of soft, velvety fabric. It felt soft and plush under you, like one of Tony’s nicer couches. It hadn’t been accompanied by the sickening crunch sound of your bones, so you were left confused.

Opening your eyes, you were in a large, darkly colored room. It reminded you of a planetarium, the sun, moon, and stars plastered on the walls around you, you even saw a pentacle or two. The room was circular, dark paint on most of the walls with silver highlights. On the ceiling was a crescent moon. You smiled warmly at the familiar aesthetic of the room.

You shifted on the couch, minding the wound still in your abdomen.

“Careful now, darling.” You’d recognize the silky smooth voice from anywhere. It reminded you of a cool night’s breeze or an owl hooting after dark. The beautiful sounds of crickets chirping under the stars. “I’d rather not see three of my children die this week, hm?” Your mother asked, sitting on the couch facing opposite you.

You looked down at her comment, feeling more like a child receiving a grounding than a woman accused of murdering her siblings. You lightly nodded, taking the jab from your mother.

She was a beautiful woman. The term ‘goddess’ fit her without a doubt. She shared a similar complexion, though darker and with much curlier hair. It fell over her shoulders in a pitch-black color, there were small dots of light throughout it, which surely would’ve entranced any mortal.

Her dress was clearly greek and resembled a toga. It was black instead of the more common white color and she had silver bands on her arms, contrasting the usual gold ones. Her eyes though. Her eyes were what always made you stop. They were gorgeous. They were pitch black and dotted with a million tiny stars. It looked like there was a whole universe in them, and you wouldn’t be surprised if there really was. You could the light of those stars twinkle, even from several feet away. Your eyes were similar to your mom’s, but you knew they weren’t anywhere near as beautiful.

Looking down at yourself you noticed your mother had given you a change of clothes. You had a toga similar to hers on. Your hair was decorated with queen of the night flowers and moonflowers. You thought it was a little on brand, but their purple color looked nice, so you let it go. You were slightly worried about explaining how you had managed to change into a greek toga complete with silver bands to your friends, but that was a conversation for later.

“I thought you’d like it. Couldn’t have you wearing that odd suit.” You were about to ask about the suit, knowing Tony had worked hard on it. “Don’t worry, the suit is in that mortal’s lab. I figured you’d want him to at least have his primitive technology back.”

She took a deep breath, planning out her next words. “I know what happened,” She began. “I’m sorry he tried to hurt Earth, I had hoped he wouldn’t but here we are. I’m sorry everything has been so hard lately. When you first went back to Earth, it was all fine. But then you didn’t make friends. Didn’t have the life you wanted. Resorted to isolation, and I’m so sorry you dealt with that.” You nodded, silently accepting the apology. You would’ve loved her help. The slightest amount of assistance along the way would’ve been great. Why on Earth has she chosen now?

“Why didn’t you help?” You asked, your face letting your upset and confused expression through.

“I’m sorry, darling?” Your mother asked, confused by what you were asking.

“I almost died, so did my friends. In fact, two of your children did die. What have you been doing?” You questioned, letting the anger you now felt cover your face just a bit more. She seemed angry, almost offended.

“Where is this coming from, sweetie?” She said you could see a shift in her eyes, like the small universe there had suddenly become a bit bluer.

“Well, I did kill my sister, watch Moros destroy your home, get stranded on an alien planet, get stabbed by my brother, kill him, then fall out of the sky.” You tried your best to stay calm. As protective as your mother was, she wasn’t afraid to get mad. She was one of the oldest beings in the universe, at this point all fear of other beings had worn off.

“I just saved you from falling out of the sky, dear, that’s why you aren’t a very frustrated pancake on the ground right now.” She sighed before taking a deep breath. You saw another shift in her eyes, the blue faded into more of a purple color. “But I understand. I shouldn’t have left you alone.”

It wasn’t quite an apology. Everyone else would’ve stopped there. Just have been thankful that a primordial god wasn’t killing them where they stood. But this felt more like a normal parent argument that the night herself was arguing with another goddess. You began to realize how much you’d been desensitized to things normal humans would find incredible.

You gathered all the courage you could, doing your best to keep your voice steady and authoritative. “Mom, you’ve been abandoning me since I was little. After I was born you were so excited that I was godly. You said my abilities were incredible. But a few years went by, and you got bored. You left me with dad. He hated everyone, sometimes I think he hated me. He left me to die. It feels like you left Ker and Moros too. I would’ve stopped if you came. I know you’d deal with them.” You felt unsure how to explain yourself, but still, you kept the same hard tone of your voice. “The gods do that a lot, Mom. And I know I’m not the only one who hates it.”

She seemed to consider your words. “I know. But, the Olympians have their rules. That includes not inferring with life… even if they did create that life themselves.”

You rolled your eyes, “When have you ever cared what Zeus says?”

Your mother didn’t seem to want to argue now. “I haven’t, but there are some rules I agree with. If humans want to survive, they should do it themselves. We shouldn’t have to hold their hand, Circe.”

You slowly nodded your head. She was right, not all life should need constant monitoring, but right now, planets all over the universe could use a little push in the right direction. “Fine, Mother. I really hope you’ll change your mind. I like Earth, it’s my home. The other planets around aren’t so bad either.”

“I’ll take it into consideration.” You knew that was her polite words for “drop the subject”. “And, I expect you to stop killing your siblings! Really, darling, most Mothers don’t need to have this conversation.”

“I’ll do my best.” You agreed. Of all your siblings, Ker and Moros were the most aggressive, so you were sure you wouldn’t have to fight the others.

“Good. Now, on to other plans! You haven’t had ambrosia in forever, darling! Nothing but mortal food. Come, you and I can have some tea together.” She said, her eyes lighting back up to their usual swirl of colors and stars. She stood up, slowly pulling you with her. The motion made your torso spark with pain, and you could feel wrappings around it, probably courtesy of your mother. Still, it was far from healed.

“Mother, I need to go back to my friends.” You explained. You saw her face fall a bit. “Not that I don’t love to see you, Mother, believe me. But I can’t sit around drinking tea right now, they need my help. Or at least need to know I’m okay, last time they thought I died they sorta freaked out.”

Not long ago, the thought of having friends that would miss you was far off in your mind. Now, not only did you have friends, but you had Loki.

And you just told him you loved him and accidentally jumped off a ship. He was probably more than a little worried about you.

“Darling, I’m sure they’re fine! Besides, some of your sisters were going to watch a supernova, I know you haven’t seen one before.” While the idea seemed beautiful, it was hardly what you wanted to do. And it seemed like Nyx could tell from your facial expression. “Ugh. This isn’t about that Asgardian boy, is it? Find some nice god here, darling. They’re below you, all those mortals are.” You wanted to yell at her. You really did, but your mother was a nice woman. You knew she had good intentions, but you were still frustrated and as much as your mother loved you, she wouldn’t take kindly to an argument. Sometimes, her temper could remind you of Odin. You were thankful you were one of her favored children, which truly made you sad for Loki. He never had that luxury.

“Mom, he’s not below me, none of them are. He’s amazing. I love him. And last time he saw me I was sorta plummeting to my death.” You reminded her.

She stared off into the distance. You weren’t even sure if she was comprehending your statement.

“I thought the same about your father, I suppose.” She began. “Thought he was so different from the rest. But he didn’t care about me the same way it seems. If he did, he would have treated you much kinder. Much, much kinder.” She shook her head. “Alright. Go back. But I expect you to visit your Mother, my dear. And bring that boy someday. Zeus won’t argue about it, he wouldn’t risk it.” She smiled, a bit of a smirk on her face. You laughed.

She pulled you closer to her, hugging you tight. Much longer than anyone else. Like a mother who hadn’t seen her child in years, and in your case, it had been decades. You could smell her hair as she held you against your shoulders. It smelled like the nighttime air on a clear summer’s day. Though your eyes were partially closed, you swore you could see far off constellations in her hair. You mumbled “I promise” into her neck and suddenly you found yourself back in New York City, hugging nothing but air.

There was rubble around you, though less than you expected from the fight. The ship above you was lower than you had left it, but still a good distance above the city. You could see some of Moros’ soldiers on the ground around you, but most of the streets were fairly clear of people. You could see people flying above you as well. Even from the distance, you recognized Tony, Thor, Sam, and Vision, probably trying to find you in all the mess.

You used your abilities, a dark smoke taking over your hands and eyes. You could feel the magic in your veins helping your wounds. You loathed the thought of lounging around the tower in this form just to heal better.

A small voice in the back of your head suggested doing that with Loki. Convincing him to sit in the small area you had to yourself, sit in your own forms and read. Or perhaps engage in more… entertaining activities. If he wasn’t too worried about you with bandages covering your abdomen.

You walked over the pavement. Now, with the rocks beneath your feet, you became very aware that you were wearing greek sandals, something your mother seemed to adore. You groaned, hating how you could feel the small rocks under your shoe.

You could hear someone land behind you, the cracked pavement and rubble making their footsteps louder.

Tony didn’t give you much of a chance to respond to his presence. Instead, he stepped out of his suit and ran toward you and hugged you. It surprised you, considering how much he hated to be touched. The hug was short, and before you knew it he had let you go and notified the team of where you were.

“You really need to stop making me think you’re dead, kid. It’s getting to be a little much at this point.” You laughed, appreciating his attempts to keep the conversation light. “Also, you wanna explain this?” He pointed to the flowers in your hair then gestured to the dress you were wearing. “‘Cause you definitely weren’t wearing this an hour ago.”

“Long story.” You heard a few other people approaching you and landing. One of the first people there was Peter in his suit. He grinned and tackled you in a hug, mumbling your name into your shoulder.

You glared at Tony. “You let him fight in this? He could’ve gotten hurt!” You understood that Peter could take care of himself, but he hadn’t even finished high school yet.

“Hey, I didn’t let him do anything. He saw what was going on and joined the fight himself.” Tony said, holding his hands up in surrender.

“I can take care of myself, you know,” Peter grumbled, letting go of you. You sighed, understanding his frustration.

“Peter, believe me, I know you’re more than capable of handling yourself, but you’re a high school student. A brilliant one at that. I don’t want you putting yourself in all this unnecessary danger when we can handle it.”

He nodded, clearly not agreeing but deciding to save the argument for later, which you were okay with. Now, you turned to the rest of the team who had all arrived by now. Thankfully, it seemed like they were able to keep the battle fairly contained.

Loki came up to you immediately, not bothering to wait for anyone to say anything. He didn’t rush to hug you, like Peter and Tony. Instead, he slowly took a few steps forward before stopping about a foot away from you.

“Never do that again. I don’t care what the circumstances are. Never do anything like that again.” He said, calmly but sternly. He didn’t look mad and his words weren’t angry. He was just scared. Scared you had almost died twice in the past few weeks. You nodded quickly.

You took the final step between you, crashing his lips into yours. His hands gripped the side of your face and yours wound their way around your neck, pulling him closer to you. Whatever the group was thinking, they didn’t say anything. Even Tony, which was probably the smartest decision he’d made all week. There was no doubt in your mind that Loki would stab him if he decided to be a smart ass.

Unfortunately, you both had to breathe at some point, so you separated. His hands slowly fell to your waist, still holding you close against him. You didn’t mind at all. He pressed his forehead against yours.

“I love you, I love you so much.” He said, eyes closed. He sounded desperate like he had no plans to let you go in the near future. You smiled at him.

“I love you too.” The words made him laugh. When he opened his eyes you swore they were tearing up the tiniest bit.

“I never thought I’d hear you say that to me again.” He sounded more emotional than you had heard him in a long time.

“I love you.” You whispered again, making him smile wider.

“I do love the dress.” He said, changing the subject slightly.

You laughed. In all fairness though, it was a nice dress. “Yeah, not bad right?” He shook his head, smiling like an idiot.

“Y/n, this is sweet, and I want to give you more time, I really do, but we have to deal with all of this,” Steve said, coming up behind Loki. You nodded, finally dropping your hands from his neck, already missing the cool feeling of his skin. “You said you killed Moros, correct?” Steve asked.

“Yes, he’s long dead. What happened after I disappeared?” Loki stood at your side, one hand still wrapped around your waist. You smiled a bit at the contact.

“SHIELD rounded up most of the soldiers. I’m sure we’ll have to make sure they’re all gone, they’re a big group.” You thought for a minute before your eyes widened.

“Hey, I know someone who might help.” You turned to Loki beside you. “Where’s Mios, the man who helped us fight Moros.” You clarified, unsure if they ever had proper introductions.

“I’m sure he’s with the rest of the high-ranking soldiers. I vouched for him though, so he’s not locked up with them.”

“Fury let you vouch for him?!” You said, surprised Fury would ever trust Loki’s word.

Loki shrugged a bit, “Well, I convinced the others to vouch for him, but still.” He said, smiling when you shook your head at him.

“Moros is really dead?” Steve said, doing his best to get the group back on track.

You nodded. “Most definitely.” Steve nodded before turning to the rest of the group, instructing them to return to the makeshift containment area SHIELD had made in the city. Everyone who could fly took off immediately. You would’ve joined them, but you appreciated the short time alone with Loki. You knew it would be a bit before you got to return to the comfort of your rooms. The two of you walked in comfortable silence, simply enjoying each other’s presence. Your head was resting on his shoulder and his hand was clamped around your waist. He was holding on tight, like with one wrong move you’d be carried away from him.

“I’m not going anywhere, Lo. I promise.” You said softly. You knew you’d get away with the nickname. It might even make him smile.

He squeezed your hip, “I know.” He seemed pleased, so you let it go, letting him keep you close.

Soon, you ended up at SHIELD’s containment for the higher-level officers. It was a small area SHIELD had set up. For the most part, it was agents surrounding small groups of soldiers, but there were too small tents sent up in the middle. Fury walked into one of them, beckoning the team to follow. There were a chair and a table there, a few papers on pictures on the table.

“We’ve contained most of the foot soldiers in a different area, there’s a hell of a lot more of them. We’ve had a few civilian casualties and a few injuries, but the evacuation helped, it could’ve been worse. Point is, the fight is over but we’ve got a bit to work on before we can put this in the record books. First, who’s the soldier who was fighting on our side?” The last part was directed toward you.

“Mios. He helped me get off Kalan, the planet I got trapped on, then gave us a warning about Moros. There wouldn’t have been an evacuation without him.” You said, trying to give Fury a reason to go easy on him. Fury nodded.

“He’s being kept on my watch. Not yours, you’ve already got him,” He said, gesturing to Loki, “You sure as hell don’t need another one. But, I won’t lock him up. He might be useful.” That wasn’t really what you wanted Fury to take away from what you said, but if it kept Mios out of a cell, it was fine.

“Can I talk to him?” You asked. Fury didn’t seem surprised at the request.

“With you heroes, you don’t give a shit if I say no. Go ahead, he’s in the other tent.” You smiled. He was right of course, you would’ve done it no matter what Fury said. You walked out, Loki now holding your hand to come with you.

The agents guarding the other tent moved aside for the two of you and you could see Mios sitting at a table in the middle of the tent. It reminded you of an interrogation room, which was probably what it was.

“Mios.”

“Salem.”

The greetings were accompanied with small smiles and a head nod. He was a kind man, even if he started on the wrong side of a war. But, most of the avengers were criminals at one point or another. All of them, actually.

“You came to help.” It was a statement, but you meant it as a question.

“Well, once I figured you were a god who was attempting to do the right thing, I had to do a little research into both sides. I found our boss, Moros, wasn’t exactly known for his kindness, but you’re known for being a little nicer. It’s a rock and a hard place, you know?” He asked, a lopsided smirk on his face. There was another chair across from his and you took a seat, Loki standing behind you.

“And you sided with me? A woman you’d known for a few days against your own men?” You said.

He shrugged. “I went against a lot of my friends when I joined Moros’ army. It wasn’t that hard to go against people I don’t even like.” He said sarcastically. You could tell his responses were more coping mechanisms than anything else, but you could respect that.

“Thank you.” Was all you offered, not questioning his decision anymore. “Your warning saved a lot of lives.” You smiled at him, “I’m doing my best to make sure you can go and actually help people after this, not stay under SHIELD’s supervision forever.”

He shook his head. “SHIELD isn’t half bad. They help people out, even if their ways aren’t the cleanest. I don’t mind sticking with them.”

You nodded, happy he was at least okay with his situation. “I’ll see you soon, Mios.” You said, squeezing his hand quickly before getting up and beginning to walk away.

“Hey, Salem.” You turned, looking at him expectantly. “Thanks.” He said, offering you a nod that you returned, walking out to the rest of the group.

***

#loki x reader #loki #salem #saved work #fanfic

4 notes · View notes

cover2covermom · 4 years

Text

Today I am sharing my favorite reads of 2019! I read 130 books in 2019, so narrowing down my list to only 10 books was not going to happen #SorryNotSorry

Here are my favorite 24 books of 2019….

» The Winter of the Witch (Winternight #3) by Katherine Arden

Now Moscow has been struck by disaster. Its people are searching for answers—and for someone to blame. Vasya finds herself alone, beset on all sides. The Grand Prince is in a rage, choosing allies that will lead him on a path to war and ruin. A wicked demon returns, stronger than ever and determined to spread chaos. Caught at the center of the conflict is Vasya, who finds the fate of two worlds resting on her shoulders. Her destiny uncertain, Vasya will uncover surprising truths about herself and her history as she desperately tries to save Russia, Morozko, and the magical world she treasures. But she may not be able to save them all.

The Winter of the Witch was the perfect conclusion to the Winternight Trilogy. The Winternight Trilogy really has it all: political intrigue, Russian folklore, magic, action, adventure, a bad ass leading lady… I cannot recommend this series enough.

You can read my mini review here ⇒ Mini Book Review: Winter of the Witch

» The Snow Child by Eowyn Ivey

Alaska, 1920: a brutal place to homestead, and especially tough for recent arrivals Jack and Mabel. Childless, they are drifting apart–he breaking under the weight of the work of the farm; she crumbling from loneliness and despair. In a moment of levity during the season’s first snowfall, they build a child out of snow. The next morning the snow child is gone–but they glimpse a young, blonde-haired girl running through the trees. This little girl, who calls herself Faina, seems to be a child of the woods. She hunts with a red fox at her side, skims lightly across the snow, and somehow survives alone in the Alaskan wilderness. As Jack and Mabel struggle to understand this child who could have stepped from the pages of a fairy tale, they come to love her as their own daughter. But in this beautiful, violent place things are rarely as they appear, and what they eventually learn about Faina will transform all of them.

There was so much that I adored about this book: the beautiful writing, the characters, the plot inspired by Russian folklore, the magic realism elements, the frontier setting of 1920s Alaska…

You can read my mini review here ⇒ Mini Book Review: The Snow Child

» Moloka’i by Alan Brennert

This richly imagined novel, set in Hawai’i more than a century ago, is an extraordinary epic of a little-known time and place—and a deeply moving testament to the resiliency of the human spirit.

Rachel Kalama, a spirited seven-year-old Hawaiian girl, dreams of visiting far-off lands like her father, a merchant seaman. Then one day a rose-colored mark appears on her skin, and those dreams are stolen from her. Taken from her home and family, Rachel is sent to Kalaupapa, the quarantined leprosy settlement on the island of Moloka’i. Here her life is supposed to end—but instead she discovers it is only just beginning.

This book was absolutely heartbreaking on so many different levels. I cried on two different occasions while reading it, and I seldom cry while reading books.

Moloka’i included themes like family (traditional and nontraditional), friendship, freedom, hope, love, religion/faith (Christianity vs. Paganism), illness, loss, and grief. This book blew me away. I read it along with one of my book clubs, and every member enjoyed it.

You can read my mini review here ⇒ Mini Book Review: Moloka’i

» Circe by Madeline Miller

In the house of Helios, god of the sun and mightiest of the Titans, a daughter is born. But Circe is a strange child—not powerful, like her father, nor viciously alluring like her mother. Turning to the world of mortals for companionship, she discovers that she does possess power—the power of witchcraft, which can transform rivals into monsters and menace the gods themselves.

Threatened, Zeus banishes her to a deserted island, where she hones her occult craft, tames wild beasts and crosses paths with many of the most famous figures in all of mythology, including the Minotaur, Daedalus and his doomed son Icarus, the murderous Medea, and, of course, wily Odysseus.

But there is danger, too, for a woman who stands alone, and Circe unwittingly draws the wrath of both men and gods, ultimately finding herself pitted against one of the most terrifying and vengeful of the Olympians. To protect what she loves most, Circe must summon all her strength and choose, once and for all, whether she belongs with the gods she is born from, or the mortals she has come to love.

I adore how Madeline Miller weaves her Greek Mythology retellings. The more of Madeline’s retellings I read, the more I want to read Homer’s The Illiad & The Odyssey. Even though I have not read Homer’s books, from what I’ve researched, Miller stays true to the original story while creating an entirely new spin on the story. Honestly, I hope she will continue this trend because I will read every one she comes out with.

Circe includes themes like complicated family dynamics, mortality vs. immortality, sexism/gender inequality, destiny, motherhood, sex positivity, and love. I was engaged from beginning to end.

You can read my mini review here ⇒ Mini Book Review: Circe

» The Poppy War (The Poppy War #1) by R.F. Kuang

When Rin aced the Keju, the Empire-wide test to find the most talented youth to learn at the Academies, it was a shock to everyone: to the test officials, who couldn’t believe a war orphan from Rooster Province could pass without cheating; to Rin’s guardians, who believed they’d finally be able to marry her off and further their criminal enterprise; and to Rin herself, who realized she was finally free of the servitude and despair that had made up her daily existence. That she got into Sinegard, the most elite military school in Nikan, was even more surprising.

But surprises aren’t always good.

Because being a dark-skinned peasant girl from the south is not an easy thing at Sinegard. Targeted from the outset by rival classmates for her color, poverty, and gender, Rin discovers she possesses a lethal, unearthly power—an aptitude for the nearly-mythical art of shamanism. Exploring the depths of her gift with the help of a seemingly insane teacher and psychoactive substances, Rin learns that gods long thought dead are very much alive—and that mastering control over those powers could mean more than just surviving school.

For while the Nikara Empire is at peace, the Federation of Mugen still lurks across a narrow sea. The militarily advanced Federation occupied Nikan for decades after the First Poppy War, and only barely lost the continent in the Second. And while most of the people are complacent to go about their lives, a few are aware that a Third Poppy War is just a spark away . . .

Rin’s shamanic powers may be the only way to save her people. But as she finds out more about the god that has chosen her, the vengeful Phoenix, she fears that winning the war may cost her humanity . . . and that it may already be too late.

If I had to sum up The Poppy War in a few words, they would be epic, brutal, and morally gray. I flew through this book despite it being 544 pages! I cannot wait to get my hands on the second book next month.

You can read my mini review here ⇒ Mini Book Review: The Poppy War

» Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson

The first ten lies they tell you in high school.

“Speak up for yourself—we want to know what you have to say.”

From the first moment of her freshman year at Merryweather High, Melinda knows this is a big fat lie, part of the nonsense of high school. She is friendless, outcast, because she busted an end-of-summer party by calling the cops, so now nobody will talk to her, let alone listen to her. As time passes, she becomes increasingly isolated and practically stops talking altogether. Only her art class offers any solace, and it is through her work on an art project that she is finally able to face what really happened at that terrible party: she was raped by an upperclassman, a guy who still attends Merryweather and is still a threat to her. Her healing process has just begun when she has another violent encounter with him. But this time Melinda fights back, refuses to be silent, and thereby achieves a measure of vindication.

In Laurie Halse Anderson’s powerful novel, an utterly believable heroine with a bitterly ironic voice delivers a blow to the hypocritical world of high school. She speaks for many a disenfranchised teenager while demonstrating the importance of speaking up for oneself.

Speak was a 1999 National Book Award Finalist for Young People’s Literature.

Books that explore sexual assault victimization are so important, especially in the YA target age range, because they can inform, increases empathy, and challenge problematic rape culture. Speak needs to be required reading for all high school aged kids.

You can read my mini review here ⇒ Mini Book Review: Speak

» Daisy Jones and the Six by Taylor Jenkins Reid

Everyone knows Daisy Jones & The Six, but nobody knows the reason behind their split at the absolute height of their popularity . . . until now.

Daisy is a girl coming of age in L.A. in the late sixties, sneaking into clubs on the Sunset Strip, sleeping with rock stars, and dreaming of singing at the Whisky a Go Go. The sex and drugs are thrilling, but it’s the rock and roll she loves most. By the time she’s twenty, her voice is getting noticed, and she has the kind of heedless beauty that makes people do crazy things.

Also getting noticed is The Six, a band led by the brooding Billy Dunne. On the eve of their first tour, his girlfriend Camila finds out she’s pregnant, and with the pressure of impending fatherhood and fame, Billy goes a little wild on the road.

Daisy and Billy cross paths when a producer realizes that the key to supercharged success is to put the two together. What happens next will become the stuff of legend.

The making of that legend is chronicled in this riveting and unforgettable novel, written as an oral history of one of the biggest bands of the seventies. Taylor Jenkins Reid is a talented writer who takes her work to a new level with Daisy Jones & The Six, brilliantly capturing a place and time in an utterly distinctive voice.

I know this book has very mixed reviews due to its format, but I LOVED this book. Since Daisy Jones and the Six is told in interview format from many different characters, many people were turned off. Since I knew this was the format going into the book, this read like a classic rock band documentary playing out in my mind. This book was meant for TV or film adaptation.

You can read my mini book review here ⇒ Mini Book Review: Daisy Jones and the Six

» The Storied Life of A.J. Fikry by Gabrielle Zevin

As surprising as it is moving, The Storied Life of A. J. Fikry is an unforgettable tale of transformation and second chances, an irresistible affirmation of why we read, and why we love.

We are not quite novels.

We are not quite short stories.

In the end, we are collected works.

A. J. Fikry’s life is not at all what he expected it to be. His wife has died; his bookstore is experiencing the worst sales in its history; and now his prized possession, a rare collection of Poe poems, has been stolen. Slowly but surely, he is isolating himself from all the people of Alice Island—from Chief Lambiase, the well-intentioned police officer who’s always felt kindly toward him; from Ismay, his sister-in-law, who is hell-bent on saving A.J. from his dreary self; from Amelia, the lovely and idealistic (if eccentric) Knightley Press sales rep who persists in taking the ferry to Alice Island, refusing to be deterred by A.J.’s bad attitude. Even the books in his store have stopped holding pleasure for him. These days, he can only see them as a sign of a world that is changing too rapidly.

And then a mysterious package appears at the bookstore. It’s a small package, though large in weight—an unexpected arrival that gives A.J. the opportunity to make his life over, the ability to see everything anew. It doesn’t take long for the locals to notice the change overcoming A.J., for the determined sales rep Amelia to see her curmudgeonly client in a new light, for the wisdom of all those books to become again the lifeblood of A.J.’s world. Or for everything to twist again into a version of his life that he didn’t see coming.

What bookworm doesn’t love a story about books, bookstores, and the people that love books? The Storied Life of A.J. Fikry was heartwarming, funny, and emotional. I’d recommend this book to fans of quirky characters & fans of books like A Man Called Ove.

This made for an excellent book club discussion with the moral dilemmas in the story.

You can read my mini book review here ⇒ Mini Book Review: The Storied Life of AJ Fikrey

» With the Fire on High by Elizabeth Acevedo

With her daughter to care for and her abuela to help support, high school senior Emoni Santiago has to make the tough decisions, and do what must be done. The one place she can let her responsibilities go is in the kitchen, where she adds a little something magical to everything she cooks, turning her food into straight-up goodness. Still, she knows she doesn’t have enough time for her school’s new culinary arts class, doesn’t have the money for the class’s trip to Spain — and shouldn’t still be dreaming of someday working in a real kitchen. But even with all the rules she has for her life — and all the rules everyone expects her to play by — once Emoni starts cooking, her only real choice is to let her talent break free.

I adored Elizabeth Acevedo’s debut novel, The Poet X, so I was very excited to read her next book. I listened to her first book via audiobook, and fell in love with the author’s narration. I chose to listen to Fire on High via audiobook as well. I loved this one just as much as her first! Elizabeth Acevedo has a beautiful way with words & I adore her characters & plotlines. I typically stray away from YA contemporary, but I’ll read anything Acevedo writes!

You can read my mini book review here ⇒ Mini Book Review: With the Fire On High

» The Read-Aloud Handbook by Jim Trelease

Recommended by “Dear Abby”, The New York Times and The Washington Post, for three decades, millions of parents and educators have turned to Jim Trelease’s beloved classic to help countless children become avid readers through awakening their imaginations and improving their language skills. Now this new edition of The Read-Aloud Handbook imparts the benefits, rewards, and importance of reading aloud to children of a new generation. Supported by delightful anecdotes as well as the latest research, The Read-Aloud Handbook offers proven techniques and strategies—and the reasoning behind them—for helping children discover the pleasures of reading and setting them on the road to becoming lifelong readers.

The Read-Aloud Family is about the the reasoning and the research/evidence behind why you should be reading aloud with your children. Since childhood literacy is a passion of mine, this book was absolutely fascinating! This book should be read by all parents, educators, and librarians!

You can read my mini book review here ⇒ Mini Book Review: The Read-Aloud Handbook

» Red Sister (Book of the Ancestor #1) by Mark Lawrence

I was born for killing – the gods made me to ruin.

At the Convent of Sweet Mercy young girls are raised to be killers. In a few the old bloods show, gifting talents rarely seen since the tribes beached their ships on Abeth. Sweet Mercy hones its novices’ skills to deadly effect: it takes ten years to educate a Red Sister in the ways of blade and fist.

But even the mistresses of sword and shadow don’t truly understand what they have purchased when Nona Grey is brought to their halls as a bloodstained child of eight, falsely accused of murder: guilty of worse.

Stolen from the shadow of the noose, Nona is sought by powerful enemies, and for good reason. Despite the security and isolation of the convent her secret and violent past will find her out. Beneath a dying sun that shines upon a crumbling empire, Nona Grey must come to terms with her demons and learn to become a deadly assassin if she is to survive…

From the very first line, I was completely captivated by Red Sister. The characters are complex. The world is well developed and fascinating. The plot was fast paced, action-packed, and an adventure from start to finish. This book has everything I love in my fantasy books: bad ass leading lady, action, magic abilities, school/training setting, political drama, and an emphasis on friendships.

You can read my mini book review here ⇒ Mini Book Review: Red Sister

» A Game of Thrones (A Song of Fire and Ice #1) by George R.R. Martin

Here is the first volume in George R. R. Martin’s magnificent cycle of novels that includes A Clash of Kings and A Storm of Swords. As a whole, this series comprises a genuine masterpiece of modern fantasy, bringing together the best the genre has to offer. Magic, mystery, intrigue, romance, and adventure fill these pages and transport us to a world unlike any we have ever experienced. Already hailed as a classic, George R. R. Martin’s stunning series is destined to stand as one of the great achievements of imaginative fiction.

A GAME OF THRONES

Long ago, in a time forgotten, a preternatural event threw the seasons out of balance. In a land where summers can last decades and winters a lifetime, trouble is brewing. The cold is returning, and in the frozen wastes to the north of Winterfell, sinister and supernatural forces are massing beyond the kingdom’s protective Wall. At the center of the conflict lie the Starks of Winterfell, a family as harsh and unyielding as the land they were born to. Sweeping from a land of brutal cold to a distant summertime kingdom of epicurean plenty, here is a tale of lords and ladies, soldiers and sorcerers, assassins and bastards, who come together in a time of grim omens.

Here an enigmatic band of warriors bear swords of no human metal; a tribe of fierce wildlings carry men off into madness; a cruel young dragon prince barters his sister to win back his throne; and a determined woman undertakes the most treacherous of journeys. Amid plots and counterplots, tragedy and betrayal, victory and terror, the fate of the Starks, their allies, and their enemies hangs perilously in the balance, as each endeavors to win that deadliest of conflicts: the game of thrones.

Game of Thrones is full of action, adventure, humor, political intrigue, plot twists, and lots of death. I was completely engrossed in this book from start to finish. I cannot wait to read the rest of the books in this series!

You can read my mini book review here ⇒ Mini Book Review: A Game of Thrones

» The Library Book by Susan Orlean

On the morning of April 29, 1986, a fire alarm sounded in the Los Angeles Public Library. As the moments passed, the patrons and staff who had been cleared out of the building realized this was not the usual fire alarm. As one fireman recounted, “Once that first stack got going, it was ‘Goodbye, Charlie.’” The fire was disastrous: it reached 2000 degrees and burned for more than seven hours. By the time it was extinguished, it had consumed four hundred thousand books and damaged seven hundred thousand more. Investigators descended on the scene, but more than thirty years later, the mystery remains: Did someone purposefully set fire to the library—and if so, who?

Weaving her lifelong love of books and reading into an investigation of the fire, award-winning New Yorker reporter and New York Times bestselling author Susan Orlean delivers a mesmerizing and uniquely compelling book that manages to tell the broader story of libraries and librarians in a way that has never been done before.

In The Library Book, Orlean chronicles the LAPL fire and its aftermath to showcase the larger, crucial role that libraries play in our lives; delves into the evolution of libraries across the country and around the world, from their humble beginnings as a metropolitan charitable initiative to their current status as a cornerstone of national identity; brings each department of the library to vivid life through on-the-ground reporting; studies arson and attempts to burn a copy of a book herself; reflects on her own experiences in libraries; and reexamines the case of Harry Peak, the blond-haired actor long suspected of setting fire to the LAPL more than thirty years ago.

Along the way, Orlean introduces us to an unforgettable cast of characters from libraries past and present—from Mary Foy, who in 1880 at eighteen years old was named the head of the Los Angeles Public Library at a time when men still dominated the role, to Dr. C.J.K. Jones, a pastor, citrus farmer, and polymath known as “The Human Encyclopedia” who roamed the library dispensing information; from Charles Lummis, a wildly eccentric journalist and adventurer who was determined to make the L.A. library one of the best in the world, to the current staff, who do heroic work every day to ensure that their institution remains a vital part of the city it serves.

Brimming with her signature wit, insight, compassion, and talent for deep research, The Library Book is Susan Orlean’s thrilling journey through the stacks that reveals how these beloved institutions provide much more than just books—and why they remain an essential part of the heart, mind, and soul of our country. It is also a master journalist’s reminder that, perhaps especially in the digital era, they are more necessary than ever.

The Library Book is an ode to libraries, and how they are such an important staple in a community.

You can read my mini book review here ⇒ Mini Book Review: The Library Book

» The Great Alone by Kristin Hannah

Alaska, 1974. Unpredictable. Unforgiving. Untamed. For a family in crisis, the ultimate test of survival.

Ernt Allbright, a former POW, comes home from the Vietnam war a changed and volatile man. When he loses yet another job, he makes an impulsive decision: he will move his family north, to Alaska, where they will live off the grid in America’s last true frontier.

Thirteen-year-old Leni, a girl coming of age in a tumultuous time, caught in the riptide of her parents’ passionate, stormy relationship, dares to hope that a new land will lead to a better future for her family. She is desperate for a place to belong. Her mother, Cora, will do anything and go anywhere for the man she loves, even if it means following him into the unknown.

At first, Alaska seems to be the answer to their prayers. In a wild, remote corner of the state, they find a fiercely independent community of strong men and even stronger women. The long, sunlit days and the generosity of the locals make up for the Allbrights’ lack of preparation and dwindling resources.

But as winter approaches and darkness descends on Alaska, Ernt’s fragile mental state deteriorates and the family begins to fracture. Soon the perils outside pale in comparison to threats from within. In their small cabin, covered in snow, blanketed in eighteen hours of night, Leni and her mother learn the terrible truth: they are on their own. In the wild, there is no one to save them but themselves.

In this unforgettable portrait of human frailty and resilience, Kristin Hannah reveals the indomitable character of the modern American pioneer and the spirit of a vanishing Alaska―a place of incomparable beauty and danger. The Great Alone is a daring, beautiful, stay-up-all-night story about love and loss, the fight for survival, and the wildness that lives in both man and nature

This book was a roller coaster of emotion & heavy topics. Themes included in The Great Alone include survival, coming of age, PTSD, domestic violence, family, & resilience.

You can read my mini review here ⇒ Mini Book Review: The Great Alone

» The Dragon Republic (The Poppy War #2) by R.F. Kuang

The searing follow-up to 2018’s most celebrated fantasy debut – THE POPPY WAR.

In the aftermath of the Third Poppy War, shaman and warrior Rin is on the run: haunted by the atrocity she committed to end the war, addicted to opium, and hiding from the murderous commands of her vengeful god, the fiery Phoenix. Her only reason for living is to get revenge on the traitorous Empress who sold out Nikan to their enemies.

With no other options, Rin joins forces with the powerful Dragon Warlord, who has a plan to conquer Nikan, unseat the Empress, and create a new Republic. Rin throws herself into his war. After all, making war is all she knows how to do.

But the Empress is a more powerful foe than she appears, and the Dragon Warlord’s motivations are not as democratic as they seem. The more Rin learns, the more she fears her love for Nikan will drive her away from every ally and lead her to rely more and more on the Phoenix’s deadly power. Because there is nothing she won’t sacrifice for her country and her vengeance.

The sequel to R.F. Kuang’s acclaimed debut THE POPPY WAR, THE DRAGON REPUBLIC combines the history of 20th-century China with a gripping world of gods and monsters, to devastating effect.

I’m happy to report that there was no second book syndrome for this epic series! The Dragon Republic was an excellent follow up to The Poppy War.

You can read my mini book review here ⇒ Mini Book Review: The Dragon Republic

» Other Words for Home by Jasmine Warga

I am learning how to be sad and happy at the same time.

Jude never thought she’d be leaving her beloved older brother and father behind, all the way across the ocean in Syria. But when things in her hometown start becoming volatile, Jude and her mother are sent to live in Cincinnati with relatives.

At first, everything in America seems too fast and too loud. The American movies that Jude has always loved haven’t quite prepared her for starting school in the US—and her new label of “Middle Eastern,” an identity she’s never known before. But this life also brings unexpected surprises—there are new friends, a whole new family, and a school musical that Jude might just try out for. Maybe America, too, is a place where Jude can be seen as she really is.

This is such an important middle grade book because it deals with a refugee experience with mild tones of Islamophobia. Warga handles these topics with care & authenticity

You can read my mini book review here ⇒ Mini Book Review: Other Words for Home

» Heroine by Mindy McGinnis

An Amazon Best Book of the Month! A captivating and powerful exploration of the opioid crisis—the deadliest drug epidemic in American history—through the eyes of a college-bound softball star. Edgar Award-winning author Mindy McGinnis delivers a visceral and necessary novel about addiction, family, friendship, and hope.

When a car crash sidelines Mickey just before softball season, she has to find a way to hold on to her spot as the catcher for a team expected to make a historic tournament run. Behind the plate is the only place she’s ever felt comfortable, and the painkillers she’s been prescribed can help her get there.

The pills do more than take away pain; they make her feel good.

With a new circle of friends—fellow injured athletes, others with just time to kill—Mickey finds peaceful acceptance, and people with whom words come easily, even if it is just the pills loosening her tongue.

But as the pressure to be Mickey Catalan heightens, her need increases, and it becomes less about pain and more about want, something that could send her spiraling out of control.

This book is one the best portrayals of drug addiction that I’ve ever read. It was raw, gritty, and deeply unsettling.

You can read my mini book review here ⇒ Mini Book Review: Heroine

» The Ten Thousand Doors of January by Alix E. Harrow

In the early 1900s, a young woman embarks on a fantastical journey of self-discovery after finding a mysterious book in this captivating and lyrical debut.

In a sprawling mansion filled with peculiar treasures, January Scaller is a curiosity herself. As the ward of the wealthy Mr. Locke, she feels little different from the artifacts that decorate the halls: carefully maintained, largely ignored, and utterly out of place.

Then she finds a strange book. A book that carries the scent of other worlds, and tells a tale of secret doors, of love, adventure and danger. Each page turn reveals impossible truths about the world and January discovers a story increasingly entwined with her own.

Lush and richly imagined, a tale of impossible journeys, unforgettable love, and the enduring power of stories awaits in Alix E. Harrow’s spellbinding debut–step inside and discover its magic.

I adored this heartwarming story of love, grief, and perseverance.

» Brave by Svetlana Chmakova

In his daydreams, Jensen is the biggest hero that ever was, saving the world and his friends on a daily basis. But his middle school reality is VERY different – math is hard, getting along with friends is hard…Even finding a partner for the class project is a big problem when you always get picked last. And the pressure’s on even more once the school newspaper’s dynamic duo, Jenny and Akilah, draw Jensen into the whirlwind of school news, social experiment projects, and behind-the-scenes club drama. Jensen’s always played the middle school game one level at a time, but suddenly, someone’s cranked up the difficulty setting. Will those daring daydreams of his finally work in his favor, or will he have to find real solutions to his real life problems?

The charming world of Berrybrook Middle School gets a little bigger in this highly anticipated follow up to Svetlana Chmakova’s award winning Awkward with a story about a boy who learns his own way of being Brave!

LOVED this graphic novel from the illustrations to the story. A wonderful depiction of the struggles of middle school.

» Emily of New Moon (Emily #1), Emily Climbs (Emily #2), &

Emily’s Quest (Emily #3) by L.M. Montgomery

#gallery-0-3 { margin: auto; } #gallery-0-3 .gallery-item { float: left; margin-top: 10px; text-align: center; width: 33%; } #gallery-0-3 img { border: 2px solid #cfcfcf; } #gallery-0-3 .gallery-caption { margin-left: 0; } /* see gallery_shortcode() in wp-includes/media.php */

Emily Starr never knew what it was to be lonely — until her beloved father died. Now Emily’s an orphan, and her mother’s snobbish relatives are taking her to live with them at New Moon Farm. She’s sure she won’t be happy. Emily deals with stiff, stern Aunt Elizabeth and her malicious classmates by holding her head high and using her quick wit. Things begin to change when she makes friends: with Teddy, who does marvelous drawings; with Perry, who’s sailed all over the world with his father yet has never been to school; and above all, with Ilse, a tomboy with a blazing temper. Amazingly, Emily finds New Moon beautiful and fascinating. With new friends and adventures, Emily might someday think of herself as Emily of New Moon.

If you enjoyed Anne of Green Gables, you’ll enjoy this series too!

» Educated by Tara Westover

Tara Westover was 17 the first time she set foot in a classroom. Born to survivalists in the mountains of Idaho, she prepared for the end of the world by stockpiling home-canned peaches and sleeping with her “head-for-the-hills bag”. In the summer she stewed herbs for her mother, a midwife and healer, and in the winter she salvaged in her father’s junkyard.

Her father forbade hospitals, so Tara never saw a doctor or nurse. Gashes and concussions, even burns from explosions, were all treated at home with herbalism. The family was so isolated from mainstream society that there was no one to ensure the children received an education and no one to intervene when one of Tara’s older brothers became violent.

Then, lacking any formal education, Tara began to educate herself. She taught herself enough mathematics and grammar to be admitted to Brigham Young University, where she studied history, learning for the first time about important world events like the Holocaust and the civil rights movement. Her quest for knowledge transformed her, taking her over oceans and across continents, to Harvard and to Cambridge. Only then would she wonder if she’d traveled too far, if there was still a way home.

Educated is an account of the struggle for self-invention. It is a tale of fierce family loyalty and of the grief that comes with severing the closest of ties. With the acute insight that distinguishes all great writers, Westover has crafted a universal coming-of-age story that gets to the heart of what an education is and what it offers: the perspective to see one’s life through new eyes and the will to change it.

This memoir was absolutely heartbreaking & horrifying. Educated makes for a perfect book club selection.

» All-American Muslim Girl by Nadine Jolie Courtney

Allie Abraham has it all going for her—she’s a straight-A student, with good friends and a close-knit family, and she’s dating cute, popular, and sweet Wells Henderson. One problem: Wells’s father is Jack Henderson, America’s most famous conservative shock jock…and Allie hasn’t told Wells that her family is Muslim. It’s not like Allie’s religion is a secret, exactly. It’s just that her parents don’t practice and raised her to keep her Islamic heritage to herself. But as Allie witnesses ever-growing Islamophobia in her small town and across the nation, she begins to embrace her faith—studying it, practicing it, and facing hatred and misunderstanding for it. Who is Allie, if she sheds the façade of the “perfect” all-American girl? What does it mean to be a “Good Muslim?” And can a Muslim girl in America ever truly fit in?

ALL-AMERICAN MUSLIM GIRL is a relevant, relatable story of being caught between two worlds, and the struggles and hard-won joys of finding your place.

This was a beautiful coming-of-age story about a girl that is struggling with her identity and feels the need to hide her true self. I loved the growth of the main character, Allie, from start to finish. I also think this book does a beautiful job of laying out what Islam is, and what it isn’t.

Did you read any of the books on my list? If so, what did you think?

What are some of your favorite books of 2019?

Comment below & let me know 🙂

Favorite Books of 2019 #BookBlogger #Bookworm #Bibliophile #Books #Reading Today I am sharing my favorite reads of 2019! I read 130 books in 2019, so narrowing down my list to only 10 books was not going to happen #SorryNotSorry…

#Am Reading #Bibliophile #book blog #book blogger #Book Chat #Book Nerd #Book Talk #Book Worm #Bookish #Books #Bookworm #Reading

0 notes

dootznbootz · 2 months

Text

When you and the lads are eating a nice meal in a nice palace after months at sea but then your hostess says "Woe, Oink be Upon Ye":

#this is dumb but I don't care. Look at the funny pig #I'll “Woe. Oink be upon ye” the haters #circe #odyssey #the odyssey #tagamemnon #greek mythology #greek myth memes #greek mythology memes #Mad rambles #shot by odysseus #epic the musical #save me morally gray circe

166 notes · View notes

dootznbootz · 23 days

Text

You can horny post and thirst for Circe and Calypso without making fun of Odysseus, a victim of both, btw. 👍

#You realize you're calling a victim a little bitch right? Do you hear yourself?#You call a man who spent every day crying about wanting to go home and who had his friends held at pig-point names?#A WHORE?!#You could literally just be like “I would love to make potions with my wife Circe” or “Beach life with my wife Calypso” but no.#You had to call the survivor names as well #I love Circe. she's morally gray af and super fun to write but I can think she's cool while knowing she terrified Odysseus.#save me morally gray circe #Mad rambles #shot by odysseus #Mad rants #odysseus #circe #calypso #odyssey #the odyssey #tagamemnon #greek mythology #epic the musical #It makes me want to eat a cactus. It's not cute to do this.#Thirst all you want. I don't care. But you don't have to mock a victim of them to do so.#tw sa mention

118 notes · View notes

dootznbootz · 2 months

Text

#Odyssey Circe would also kick Miller Circe's ass #anti circe #anti madeline miller #odyssey #the odyssey #I'm sorry but I'm also not #tagamemnon #odysseus #greek mythology #remember I like Odyssey Circe. She's morally gray and that's cool.#save me morally gray circe #Mad rambles #shot by odysseus #He would hate Circe's Odysseus so much and would just hate that book. Odyssey Circe would too.

87 notes · View notes

dootznbootz · 4 months

Text

I don't think Greek Mythology retellings/adaptions/inspired/etc. are necessarily "evil"...but I DO think people REALLY need to understand that there's a huge difference between the actual mythology and certain media.

I feel like people have to basically do a "Fandom ___" to say the different versions. Like "PJO ___", "Hades game ___", "TSOA ___". For it to be understood that these depictions are DIFFERENT. I'm saying this as someone who grew up reading PJO and still has a soft spot for it. But as someone who really loves Greek Mythology as well, I sometimes get really SAD.

I'm going to use the comparison of Howl's Moving Castle with it's Book Vs. Movie. I enjoy both!!! But they are honestly very different. In the movie there is no "sister swap", Markle isn't a young teenager, Sophie doesn't throw weed killer at Howl, and many more moments. But I enjoy both because even though there are changes they still keep components that are ingrained into the characters!

In some Greek Myth retellings/adaptations/stories/etc., characters are...SO different from the source material. That's fine...Choose what you want with your story... But folks should know that the modern adaptations are NOT the source material!!!

It bothers me that a lot of these wonderful myths and stories are twisted up and seen so differently because of a modern version of them. You can have that character be "awful" or a certain way in your story. But I almost feel that as fans, it's not good to generalize them or see it as "This is the truth". People are hating the mythological figure when it's only in that interpretation they are like that.

In PJO, Ares is "Zeus' favorite", isn't a good dad, a misogynist, etc. The actual myths? One of his Epithets is LITERALLY "Feasted by Women", in the Iliad everybody basically bullies him with Zeus literally saying he hates him. He cries when he learns one of his sons is killed in the war. He literally kills someone about to rape his daughter. Ares isn't perfect but it makes me sad with how he's viewed and talked about when it's only in PJO he's like that. Same with Dionysus. Read the Bacchae, you'll love it.

In Lore Olympus, Apollo rapes Persephone (noticing the fact that modern takes on the myths add rapes where there never were hmmmmm) when he never did in any of the myths.

In TSOA, Thetis is cruel when in the Iliad, she is such a loving mother to Achilles. She grieved alongside her son over Patroclus. Also with Agamemnon. In Ipheginia at Aulis, Agamemnon is a MESS. He adored his children.

In Circe, Odysseus is viewed as a selfish man who ONLY hurts others and doesn't care about his family when that is LITERALLY his one consistent character trait. HE is actually the one who is the victim of rape. Circe was never raped.

Medusa is only a victim in Ovid's, a Roman man, works. Not in GREEK mythology. She was just a cool monster. Leave Perseus alone. Poseidon and Medusa actually had a consensual relationship in Greek Mythology!

These adaptations/retellings/inspired by/etc. whatever anybody wants to call them, are not the real myths! They may be similar in some ways but to just generalize them or hate the deity/mythological figure because of something they did in the new media feels fucked up!

You can enjoy these new stories. There's nothing wrong with that!!! But know they're not the real myths. Maybe even label it as "I hate ____'s version of ____". As that makes it clear what version you're talking about.

#I'm probably wording this very weird. I'm sorry for that haha #idk I'm getting sad #I'm clutching the gods and my special lil heroes to my chest to protect them from the hate.#this is silly but...idk had to say it :(#anti circe #anti madeline miller #sorry but that book makes me the sad™#greek mythology #tagamemnon #Mad rambles #shot by odysseus #PJO is special to me but I'm protecting the Gods >:( They can suck in PJO. to say the suck in the myths when you don't know the actual #myths is...sad #tw rape #<because so many adaptations ALSO add them when they're not there!!!!#save me morally gray circe #essay

97 notes · View notes

dootznbootz · 1 month

Text

#I want Odysseus and Helen chatting in another room and then being like “what are you two doing?”#“Oh we're just taking out the trash” and then it cuts to them just chasing a person with shitty literacy #“AND MENELAUS COMES IN WITH THE CHAIR!”#...While Menelaus would hate the actual “wrestling” of WWE. I think he'd LOVE the costumes and gimmicks.#being a shiny boy while kicking ass? He loves that.#save me morally gray circe #greek mythology memes #Mad rambles #shot by odysseus #This is from that one ask that talked about Helen and I'm still mad about it :P #odypen #helen x menelaus #Water Wife

31 notes · View notes

dootznbootz · 2 months

Note

I went on tiktok to just watch some silly Odysseus videos but then I mostly saw people going like "Yeah, maybe Odysseus cried on Calypso' island every day but honestly he had that coming after what he did Achilles and Patroclous/Circe!!!" and "Everything that happens in Odyssey is deserved cuz he took Patrochilles to war!!!" and "I feel so bad for Circe and Calypso and Penelope, they deserved better!!!"

For fucks sake I beg you, read anything different from Millers bs and like educate yourself- And please stop goddamn saying that rape victim. deserved it.

Circe probably didn't give a flying fuck, Calypso is a rapist and abuser and Penelope deserved everything she wanted and SHE WANTED ODYSSEUS

I think I've had enough internet for today, imma go wash my eyes with bleach. Anyways sorry for ranting here, i hope you don't mind it lmao

It's alright. I absolutely understand the vents about the whole thing. :'D No one deserves to be a victim of such a thing no matter WHAT they've done. I hope your eyes are okay after the bleach

Like Odysseus does so many fucked up things but Calypso and Circe? He is the victim. Period. It's very clear that Odysseus is in extreme distress on Ogygia. And Circe wasn't some sort of FwB situation. There's fear and numbness in the language he uses when talking about it. There's so much victim blaming and it SUCKS.

While back then it probably wouldn't be considered SA but now? It clearly is.

Even then, Odysseus' journey was kind of about "temptation" or just straight up "Die or get out of my sea." From Poseidon. "I don't want you in my waters so I'm gonna try and give you things that will keep you on land or just kill you."

Immortal goddesses wanting you would be many people's dream come true but not for Odysseus. And I think that's the point. His determination, how he clawed his way back into the arms he never wanted to leave in the first place, is incredible. Many people would've given up and just started a new life but he never would because no life he could ever create would compare to the life he had before. Even if it's different, it's what he's always wanted.

He literally tells Calypso "I'm not stopping until I'm home. I don't care if I suffer more until I do. I'm going home."

“Mighty goddess, do not be angry with me over this. I myself know very well Penelope, although intelligent, is not your match to look at, not in stature or in beauty. But she’s a human being and you’re a god. You’ll never die or age. But still I wish, every moment to get back to my home, to see the day of my return. And so, even if out there on the wine-dark sea some god breaks me apart, I will go on— the heart here in my chest is quite prepared to bear affliction. I’ve already had so many troubles, and I’ve worked so hard through waves and warfare. Let what’s yet to come be added in with those.”

(Book 5, Johnston)

Circe's a goddess and what happened is nothing like Dionysus and Ariadne and Apollo and Hyacinthus for example. Circe never gave Odysseus a crown of stars and he would never go out of his way to kill 120 people for bothering her. They did not love each other and he can't refuse as she's a goddess.

If you interpret them sleeping together the entire year,(It's only explicitly said that they had sex once so that's what I go with personally.) that doesn't mean he was happy with it! Even then, the whole situation is not what a healthy FwB should look like! I'm asexual and even I know that no one in a FwB situation should have to BEG in any way that basically says "Please let me go or kill me" with supplication!!! The fact that he leaves so quickly he forgets one of his men? The fact that during Elpenor's funeral, he doesn't greet Circe himself? He was avoiding her. Wouldn't he want to get "one last night together" during Book 12 if they were fwb? 🙄

It's bonkers to me that people hate him for being a "cheater" when A.) having multiple lovers wasn't uncommon in Ancient Greece, and B.) the two people he is explicitly said to have "cheated" with, weren't his choice. He wasn't actively searching for pretty women either!!!

As mentioned, while it was common for men to have many lovers, Odysseus never had any listed unlike some of the other men. (not bashing any of them. I'm just making a point in comparison.) He also has no other children besides Telemachus in Homer's works. There's no evidence of him having other lovers other than speculation. (funny enough, I once read somewhere that the reason why Odysseus is so mean is because he doesn't "bond" enough with the other soldiers. 😂)

Does that mean he didn't have other lovers? Technically, Nope! It's just never explicitly stated either way. He has slaves but none were ever said to be concubines or that he sleeps with them. He has deep bonds with his fellow soldiers but that doesn't mean he sleeps with them. That doesn't mean people can't write or talk about him doing so even though it's not mentioned! Just like it also means that someone can write him not doing so as there's nothing that says it either way in Homer's Works! :D

It's fucked up when people say "He didn't try to leave Calypso enough" or something of the like. It just tells you how A.) they didn't read the Odyssey or have piss on the poor reading comprehension or B.) ...you should probably stay away from that person...

With Circe though??? I can understand the confusion but digging deeper and looking at the text, he wasn't having a good time. Or at the very least was walking on Eggshells the whole time. I hate bringing up that essay over and over again but like...I literally wrote everything there.

I also don't like how people take Circe's morally gray-ness away from her. Let her do something fucked up to be fucked up!!! Let her traumatize Odysseus!

Idk, I kind of hate that I'm "known" for this but I relate to this idiot asshole a lot and it means a lot to me that his story, despite what happens to him, has a happy ending :'D

#Thank goodness I don't have tiktok >:)#I wish there was a way to like. have anonymous posts? because I made that PTSD post to show how him refusing to be bathed #by Nausica's maids and him choking Euryclea and was giving reference to make a point but I wish I wasn't like. Known for this???#but like... I HAVE something to say. Having specific knowledge of some things just...really makes it clear in what happened that I don't #think others have considered.#And I was afraid if I was “vague” then people would say “You're just saying that to get sympathy points” and I didn't want to deal with #that :'D plus like in his outbursts I saw myself you know?#I just kept thinking “oh shit. I KNOW what you're doing because I did it too aAAAAAHHHHHHHHh”#I relate to Helen too but in a way. The Odyssey shows her “HEALED” (which fuck yeah!!! YESSS!!!😭) it doesn't show the #PTSD in the same way as she's had many years to recover. Watching it happen in “real time” for Odysseus was...really nice.#i said it before but the Odyssey feels REAL compared to the “girlboss queen slay” shit. Him tryiing to force himself into normalcy #only to act out is...yeah.#save me morally gray circe #ask #anon #Mad rambles #tw sa #tw ptsd #tw sex assault #anti madeline miller #anti circe #essay

21 notes · View notes