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jennycalendar · 2 years

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can you elaborate on that comment in the tags about giles and jenny not getting back together if angel had died and jenny had lived?

oh absolutely i can!

so i waver on whether buffy would ever have totally forgiven jenny had angel died in a way that was completely permanent, especially in a timeline where nothing bad has ever actually happened to jenny? like, she is buffy's scapegoat. she is who buffy pins the guilt onto and it's very important narratively speaking that she dies in large part because the guilt is shifted to her and she is shifted out of the loop. i personally am of the mind that this situation was no one's fault, but that it also came about in a way where absolutely everyone closely involved would feel like it was Their Fault Specifically (jenny, giles, buffy, angel...) even though that obviously isn't the case.

but. like. buffy does not totally forgive jenny? that's not what happens. she basically says "keep feeling bad forever," hesitates, and then reluctantly gives them her blessing for giles's sake. it's very possible that buffy would not intentionally draw that wedge between them, but i can't see buffy being totally comfortable with giles and jenny being couple-y in a timeline where angel is dead, and i CAN see giles picking up on that and kinda doing one of those self-sacrificing watcher things where he and jenny mutually agree to cut their relationship short.

and it's giles and jenny, so there really isn't any wavering during the breakup if BOTH parties are committed to it! their weird couple-y tension came less from them not being able to stay apart and more from one party wanting a clean break and the other party being absolutely heartbroken & desperately trying to win their honey back.

again: it might not pan out like this! maybe buffy WOULD find peace w it! but it is crystal clear that giles Is Not comfortable with buffy and angel, even if he is very careful not to say anything about it, and for the sake of the role reversal we are assuming that buffy Is Not comfortable with giles and jenny in that same "your partner contributed to my trauma in a huge way" kinda deal. and like i don't think there is any situation where giles and jenny stay together if it's impacting buffy the way that angel and buffy staying together very quietly impacts giles. i genuinely think she might straight up leave town for a little while and it might take them years to reconnect, if they do. (my brain is of course now jumping to an even angstier s6 where after buffy's death giles immediately seeks jenny out for comfort, and so when buffy comes back there is a lot of Loaded Tension re: what this move of giles's implies, and what he might have wanted, and buffy's new and improved guilt complex + GILES feeling shitty about buffy finding out about feelings he never wanted her to know...)

but honestly yeah it just feels weird to me? maybe the rest of the season will change my mind, i am soooo hoping that it will, but the idea of angel's loss being the fundamental horrific tragedy is genuinely baffling to me when giles was brutalized and his girlfriend was killed BY ANGEL. definitely the characters within the narrative don't have a lot of sympathy for angel atm, but the narrative ITSELF is framing this as a point of heartbreak as well. that buffy's pain isn't understood because her boyfriend, um, killed a whole bunch of people and everyone is understandably a little bit not at all on Team Angel right now. and it just feels....not sure how i feel about it. confused perhaps.

#asks #i vacillate btwn like. buffy is the protagonist of course her pain is central #and like ..... actually what is happening here. why is the loss of angel so tragic under these circumstances #i think part of why it's lost on me is -- like i said! i just did not connect w the romance in season two like i hoped i would #so that colors it and that's why. like #i gotta label these as Opinions and not necessarily Text Supported Readings

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bluesadansey · 1 year

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I’m not really in the mood to start watching something new even though I technically have a lot I want to lol, so on a whim because I feel like it I’ve started a TVD rewatch attempt let’s see if I follow through! (I’ve only seen the whole show (like 7.5 seasons I didn’t see all of s8) once but I’ve seen majority of s2-3 eps multiple times and a select handful of s1 4 and 5 eps a couple times each and most s6 eps twice since I did a rewatch of just that season in December (technically I did not finish it but that wasn’t about my follow through I just didn’t have hbomax access for a while and by the time I had it back was focused on other things again)

so anyway. notes I took rewatching the first couple episodes (my plan rn is to Not lb in the format I sometimes do because I think I’ll exhaust myself/my commitment, instead will try to either write some notes during or takeaways directly after watching the eps when I feel like it and share intermittently)

Pilot

-Elena Bonnie and Caroline are all so pretty here such pretty faces and pretty shiny hair all around

-really enjoy how cynical Elena is even as she’s trying to put on a brave “today I will smile and it will be believeable” face. especially her talking about people’s reactions to hers and Jeremy’s grief and the “the rest of the world has moved on” quote near the end I can (unfortunately) relate to a lot of this so much more than the first time I watched the show :(

-Caroline’s immediate interest in Stefan + “it’s not going to happen” I do lol knowing how this all plays out :)

-Bonnie’s ‘psychic’ ness so cute but also her predicting happiness… ironic not in a happy way. This being one of the episodes if not the episode where she’s happiest I think…

-Bonlena moments are very cute in the pilot

-running up the hill wasted on a boring moment in the pilot is so funny, but I do really like it ending with (in a sense) the first steferine moment

-so much bad and poorly aged dialogue. obviously. but then glimmers of really good dialogue out of nowhere

-I do sort of wish Damon’s crow powers had been a consistent thread. I don’t remember it being a thing after early s1? Would have been so funny

-Vicki was a standout to me rewatching this. Knowing what happens to her is so sad… Matt should have died instead of her and She should have been around for the whole show fr

-Jenna is an angel

-the dialogue is worse than I remembered overall but I’m going to say the visuals/effects are better than I remembered?

-also I actually rewatched the Pll pilot a couple days ago so was struck a bit by the similar structure of some things, they both open with the blonde girl who is killed/missing (only for TVD it’s a random girl we have no attachment to, for Pll it’s obviously Alison who is a Presence. and then it’s much later in the TVD pilot that we see Katherine who is the char with Alison haunting status for chars in s1), the focus on the liars but especially Aria/Elena’s attempts to move on from grief general quotes about moving on from the past, similar structuring to some of the Aria&Mike/Elena&Jeremy scenes. the funeral at the end of the Pll ep v Vicki being taken to the hospital at the end of TVD. There are others

-it also was very funny to me that they stress the “passion” of SE vs Matt and Elena in the pilot considering that is going to become a tag line for DE

The Night of the Comet

-Elena and Stefan waking up and both thinking ‘wow it’s so weird how I see color/am not as depressed as usual. and it’s all because I remembered what it’s like to be horny’ is hilarious sorry

-I am mad at that teacher I was mad on Elena’s behalf last episode now I’m mad on Jenna’s! Leave Jenna alone

-the way Damon put his hand on Elena’s back/shoulders in their first meeting to guide her + general manner towards her like makes me uncomfortable. Which I guess is the intention at this point

-Jenna looks so good I need her

-when Elena is telling Jenna about Stefan being on the rebound and her responding that “at least it’s another woman wait until you date a guy with mommy issues or cheating issues or amphetamine issues” find this hilarious because Stefan DOES in fact have mommy issues as we will learn, and the show treats his blood issues as metaphorical addiction issues. cheating issues no but his whole transference deal with Katherine-Elena is maybe not so different you could make the argument? like it’s not that but there’s emotional dishonesty in a way.

-also I just enjoy Elena and Jenna so much as a duo.

-I really like Bonnie’s outfit passing out Night of the Comet fliers with Elena

-Bonnie touching Stefan and getting bad vibes if such a mood

-there’s quite a bit of language iin these two episodes that’s aged badly but Caroline’s “druggies are the biggest attention whores” (paraphrased) line about Vicki particularly egregious

-Gravity playing in the SE kiss is so funny because I first watched this pre Community so now I have the Paradigms association. lol

-but also Stefan’s “it was epic” line my brain made an association to Leronica “I thought our story was epic” and SE could Never be what Logan x Veronica is smh so I was a little offended

*Also watched Friday Night Bites but actually watched most of that while working out and didn’t take notes. And I have reflections but, not that there isn’t plenty to be said about this episode but I’ll take a pass rn*

#s speaks #s rewatches tvd #I feel good about this decision I think it’s time. And I do think I’ll follow through!#I might take breaks but am *feeling* it / committed #(convo with Maze about how we’d both like to rewatch legacies but are also scared to might have triggered it.#I’m not quite ready for that but I think I’m finally ready for this)

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winifredsandersonsbitch · 4 years

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“Why Not Me?”

Spike x Summers!Reader, BTVS

Warnings: angst, character death, cursing, some sexual content

Description: The reader is struggling with their sister’s death and needs a helping hand. Set between the end of S5 and the beginning of S6.

This has been sitting in my drafts for a hot minute while I’ve been working on other stuff. It’s actually one of the first Spike pieces I wrote 🙈 I’m not in love with it, but I’ve been busy with other things lately and I wanted to release some new content, so here you go! I’m currently working on figuring out how to put together a masterlist and link my stories with the read more thing that I see on other fic writers’ pages so things are a little more organized.

Also (last thing, promise), I just wanted to say how much I appreciate the likes and comments you guys leave! @kind-wolf especially has helped motivate me so much in releasing new work, even if I feel it’s not my best ❤️

The first few days are hard. You wouldn’t be able to get yourself out of bed if not for Dawn. Everyone keeps peeking glances at you like you’re broken, like after your mother died but worse.

Infinitely worse, because Buffy and Dawn are your responsibility. You’re the oldest. You’re meant to protect them, to shield them. But all you’ve ever done is watch as your sister saved the world. And now even that has been taken from you.

You keep busy. You can only take so many days off work, trade so many shifts. Soon you have to go back and Dawn has to go to school, unless you want her to be taken from you, too.

Spike watches her for you while you’re at the diner. You’ve shortened your hours so you can sometimes be there with her before she goes to bed, but you’ve still got bills to pay. And you can’t bring up downsizing like you once meant to. Not when the house is the last thing linking the formerly whole Summers family together.

Willow does her best to play therapist, considering how you can’t go to a real one. First of all, they’d probably commit you for telling them your story. Second, you don’t have the strength to let anyone else in. Expanding your world to include more people only means that you have more of them to lose.

You made some mistakes in the first few weeks. You’re not proud of them by any means, but you’re doing your best to own them.

The worst one involved Spike.

One night (or, rather, morning) after your shift was over, you had come home and showered. As usual, you cried for as long as you could justify letting the water run. Then you stepped out and wrapped yourself in a fluffy towel that you almost dropped when you saw him waiting in your room.

“I think we need to have a chat, Summers.”

He patted the bed next to him, just like he had when he tagged along for the first time to your diner shift all those months ago. The gesture made you want to cry again.

“Let me get dressed,” you mumbled. You rummaged through your dresser for a tank top and sweatpants, the only types of clothing besides your uniform that you had been using since the funeral. Then you locked yourself in the bathroom.

You strongly considered crawling out the window, but you were too loud when you tried to pry it open and Spike rapped loudly on the door.

“Don’t even try it, love.”

Resigned, you came out to sprawl on your bed and wait for the lecture.

Spike started in as usual by saying that you weren’t taking care of yourself. Once again, you reminded him that you were a perfectly capable adult who was keeping an entire household running and that you didn’t need him or anyone else questioning you.

“I know you’re capable, that’s not the point—”

“Then what is the point? What right do you have—”

“I’ve been right here beside you the whole time! I’m allowed to have some input—”

“I’m sorry, is your name Spike Summers? No? Then get off my ass about—”

You could see in his eyes that he wanted to shake some sense into you. He thought you were the one being obtuse. But all you were doing, all you had ever tried to do, was to hold everything together.

“Summers,” he growled. The two of you had been inching closer together during your heated argument, your voices raised dangerously, considering Dawn was still asleep. For a moment, you saw a flicker of his other face. Even knowing he wouldn’t hurt you, you gulped. “Stop being so bloody thick about everything. You’re working yourself to death, and who’s going to be here for Dawn if you’re carted off to the hospital?”

Normally, this was the point where the tears would flow against your will, but you only felt frustrated. Then Spike tucked a piece of hair behind your ear and it boiled over.

“Let me take care of you,” he said, and you still don’t know why you did what you did next. Maybe you wanted to push him away like you had been doing with everyone else. Maybe you wanted a distraction. Or maybe you just wanted him.

You kissed him.

It was an automatic reaction, but if you had to guess, you’d say it was probably because you needed to show him that you were fine at taking care of yourself. You were still an independent agent, making your own decisions, however poor they might be. But you didn’t think that was the message he got at all, because it turned needy real quick.

His hand came to the back of your head as he wove his fingers through your hair in a tender gesture, but you didn’t want tender. You wanted the pain to be blocked out. You tried to seal yourself to him, pulling yourself into his lap. You ran your nails over his jaw, his neck, and then his chest, clawing at his shirt. He lifted it halfway, enough for you to see the defined abs that waited beneath, before he pulled away abruptly and dumped you onto the bed.

“We can’t,” he said, panting. “You’re grieving.”

“I’m fine.”

You crawled over to him and slipped off the edge of the bed to press him against the wall, but he held you back.

“You’re sick. It would be taking advantage.”

He knew before the words left his mouth that it was the wrong thing to say.

Your eyes widened and you wiped your mouth with the back of your hand, suddenly wanting every trace of him off you. You stepped toward the door backwards, almost tripping over your backpack.

“No, my mom was sick,” you said with your hand on the knob. Then, whipping back around, your face contorted like a Fury: “You’re sick, you know that? You chase after me for months, following me to work, to school, telling me you don’t want to see me hurt myself. You hold me while I’m sleeping and touch me when you think no one’s watching and joke in front of the others about how you’d like to see me naked and then I give you the chance to and what? Has mourning made me so awful to you?”

Spike couldn’t have been more shocked if you slapped him. He kept waiting for your knees to buckle, for you to break down, but you never did. Not in front of the others, not in front of him. Anyone would think you were the goddamn Energizer Bunny, if not for how exhausted you looked.

“Love—”

“Don’t fucking call me that,” you said. “If you aren’t willing to ‘take advantage,’ I’ll find someone who is.”

You didn’t slam the door. Even now, you were mindful of Dawn, of how early it was. Instead, you grabbed your keys from the kitchen countertop and made it as far as the front porch before you folded in on yourself.

Not now, you pleaded, praying to a God you weren’t sure existed. Please, let me get somewhere else first.

But you couldn’t move. You kept seeing Buffy fall over and over again, tearing through the inter-dimensional portal like a silk screen, hitting the concrete hard.

You couldn’t breathe.

It was like you could see her and Dawn up top, before Buffy dived down like some kind of fucking Olympic swimmer. You had been on the ground with the others, but you could see them in that moment. Buffy taking Dawn’s face in her hands as she cried. Playing the hero. Telling your sister how she had to do this and to remember how much she loved you both.

You didn’t see or hear Spike come out on the patio or notice when he pried the keys from your hands. You were too busy sobbing silently to the point where he was worried you might pass out.

“It should have been me,” you said, not to him or yourself, but to whatever God had taken Buffy. Glory, maybe. Someone with more power than you. “I’m the oldest. I should have been there. Bring her back and take me.”

“She was the Slayer,” Spike said softly. He didn’t touch you, just sat a fair distance away and ached. “It had to be her.”

In your crazed state, you thought God was talking back, and he happened to have a British accent. You tried to reason with him.

“No, it wasn’t about that. It was about Summers blood. It could have been me, if I had gotten there in time. If—”

“You wouldn’t have made it up the steps past Glory, past the demon. You didn’t have a chance.”

“But it should have been me!” The words came out as more of a wheeze than anything else. You weren’t taking in enough oxygen to support your crying jag. “I should have been the Slayer. I’m the oldest. Why did you choose her? Was I not strong enough?”

You couldn’t open your eyes fully through all the tears. They swam in front of your vision like you were underwater, turning your car into a coral reef, the grass of the front yard into seaweed.

“Or if I couldn’t be the Slayer or the Key, then I should have been the one to jump. You know it’s true,” you pleaded. “Summers blood. It’s all the same.”

But it wasn’t. Because whatever blood was in Dawn and Buffy contained courage.

Spike didn’t know who you thought you were talking to, but he was worried you were going to knock yourself out on the steps and split your head open, with the way you were wavering back and forth, leaning forward to weep and then throwing your head back to ask why, why, why it hadn’t been you.

Finally, he had to restrain you, scooping you up into his lap and holding you tight to keep you from getting any ideas about taking a dive of your own off the porch. At first, you fought against him, thrashing like a wildcat, but you were too tired to keep it up for long.

“Why not me?” you asked him again. Your voice was muffled against his chest, but he heard you loud and clear. How could he not?

“Because you’re needed here. You’re the only thing keeping everyone sane, lo—” He cut himself off, barely remembering how much the word had upset you earlier. “You protected Buffy as best you could your whole life. And now you need to be here for Dawn.”

“No,” you said, wrestling out of his grip enough to face him. “I mean, why don’t you want me?”

Your eyes were swollen and you had just gotten snot all over his shirt, but in that moment he was so grateful that you were alive that his heart would’ve skipped a beat if it could have. He pulled you close and kissed your forehead, breathing in the smell of your shampoo, reminding himself that you were flesh and blood right before him. You were still here.

“Any other time, sweetheart, it would’ve been you,” he whispered against your cheek. You were going slack in his arms, relaxing like a kitten, unable to keep yourself upright and rigid when you were so completely spent. He could taste your tears. “I always want you. But not like this.”

“What do you—hic—mean?”

This was alright. You were a little out of it still, but you were coherent, and you weren’t trying to hurt yourself anymore. Spike resisted the urge to pull you closer, to feel your heart beat against his chest like it was his own, just to confirm you were here, solid, breathing.

“I want you when I can tell it’s real. That you don’t need someone to take your pain away and that’s it, even though I’d strip right now, right here on the porch, if I thought it would help.”

Spike thought he might get a laugh out of you there, but your eyes were unfocused. Frightening. He lifted you up like you weighed nothing, which wasn’t far from the truth now that you’d all but stopped eating, and carried you back into the house and up the stairs to your bedroom.

“I want you so much it hurts,” he promised you as he peeled back the covers to tuck you in. “Like when I’m starving for blood and there’s no one around.”

He checked your face quickly, thinking his metaphor might’ve been less-than-helpful, but when it remained blank he continued.

“I need you. That means I have to do what’s best for you, and right now that’s not sex.”

He started across the room, but you called out.

“Spike?” You sounded uncertain, fragile. “Will you stay with me? Not for... not for sex.”

“Of course I will, lo— Summers.”

He shed his t-shirt and slipped into the fuzzy bottoms you’d gotten him a few months ago, when things were not quite good but getting back to normal, and cradled you.

He gave it a couple minutes before he tried again. “Summers, you know, if you do want sex in the future and you’re not on the verge of a breakdown, I’m your guy.”

But you were already asleep.

#fanfiction #btvs #buffy season 5 #buffy the vampire slayer #spike x reader #reader insert #buffy season 6

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blodreina-noumou · 4 years

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Final Season Spec Game

I’m out of tag games to speculate on season 7, so here we are! I wanted to keep these questions mostly upbeat (because we all know how this show can be sometimes lol we’re in for angst for sure 😉) and there’s 16 of them, one for each remaining ep! Feel free to play along everybody… Stay safe! 💙

I swiped this from @katersann - great questions!

1. Which character are you most excited to learn the endgame of:

There’s only a handful of characters I truly care about anymore, and there will always be one that rises above the rest -

Obviously next season is going to feature the Anomaly in a big way, and since that whole thing seems deeply connected to Octavia, I think we can safely assume that this will be a big season for her. I hope she makes it out alive, but on some level, I won’t be surprised if she doesn’t. Going out in a blaze of glory was always more her style. I think that’s true even now.

2. Which character are you most excited to learn the backstory of:

I’m definitely curious about Hope Diyoza. The fact that she and Octavia appeared to know each other in the s6 finale has huge implications. And I’m sure her life has been really fuckin’ interesting - with a mother like Charmaine, how couldn’t it be?

3. One character who deserves a new look:

Madi!

She’s not a scrappy forest child anymore, nor is she a Baby Warlord. I’d love to see her in anything but leather (or a hospital gown, yikes.) I don’t know how central to the main plot she’ll be, since she no longer has The Flame, but I do hope we get to see something about her trying to become a semi-normal kid.

4. Two locations you want to revisit:

If I had my druthers, I’d love to see the Dropship again. It was such a central location in the first two seasons, and one of the things that’s been tough for me since the second Praimfaya has been how we lost all those iconic locations.

I also really loved the look of Shallow Valley aka Eden. A very cute, aesthetically pleasing location, gone too soon.

5. Three brotps you hope get more screentime:

Octavia and Diyoza!

(Technically a Brot3 but just try and stop me!) Raven, Murphy, and Emori!

Raven and Echo!

6. Who will get the happiest ending:

Honestly a tough call, because I don’t know if anyone will truly get a “happy” ending. If I had to guess, Raven and Echo are actually pretty high up there. As long as they both survive the season, I think they’ll finally find some peace on the other side.

7. Which minor or new characters you want to see more of:

Given that Jordan was a series regular last season, we saw a LOT less of him than I expected. I think he’s going to be an unexpected antagonist in the final season, which should be a lot of fun.

8. Who will eventually snap Jordan out of the funk we see him in, at the end of 6x13:

Agh, I don’t know. He didn’t really get a chance to connect with any of his parents’ old friends, did he? The deepest connection he made was with Delilah, and she’s dead and gone - but I don’t think he believes that, I think he’s fully swallowed the Sanctum juice at this point. I could maybe see Raven snapping him out of it, or Bellamy. If it’s not them, it’ll definitely be some message from Marper somehow. Or, tragically, he won’t make it out of the funk. I’ll be really mad if that happens, given who his namesake was. The Jordan curse.

9. Who will be the first to tell Bellamy he can’t immediately run into the Anomaly after Octavia:

Oddly enough, my money is on Hope. And I think Bellamy will immediately distrust her and try to go anyway, but Echo will ultimately stop him.

10. To reference Monty’s ‘do better’ mantra:

I’d like to hear it from Murphy, to be honest, or Emori. I don’t think it was necessarily Clarke’s right to take so much ownership of that one, last season.

11. To say 'go float yourself’:

I hope I hear it from the mouth of every single (former) Delinquent, lmao. It’d actually be hilarious if someone like Emori or Echo said it, though. Show how it’s left the Ark as slang and entered the general parlance.

12. Random object or prop you would bring back for Season 7 if you could:

Lexa’s throne/Clarke’s walking stick. I really fuckin’ loved that little callback, y’all. Clarke leaning on a piece of Lexa to make it through her time in isolation - ugh, murder me. Even if it isn’t a major plot point, I’d like to see it in the background somewhere. I don’t think it made it off Earth, though.

13. Book One storyline/reference you want to see back for Season 7:

We’ve got 16 episodes, right? Bring back my funny fillers! I know they weren’t common, and weren’t 100% funny, but I’d love to see an episode like “Day Trip” again.

14. Dead character you would like mentioned:

Lincoln, Anya, and Nyko. Pay respect to the OG grounders. Even if it’s just in passing.

15. How do you think Hope and Octavia know each other (from season 6):

There’s been a lot of speculation about what this face was meant to imply -

Personally, when I look at Octavia’s face, I see an entire goddamn story. It’s a story I might fully be projecting, but I’m going with my gut until proven otherwise. Octavia helped raise Hope. When she sees her, she looks at her the way one might a kid they haven’t seen in a long time - there’s surprise, tenderness, pride. A moment of almost not recognizing her, then realization that’s she’s the a kid she loves, all-grown-up now, and that’s what makes her emotional.

My other theory is that Octavia didn’t remember Hope at all until she saw her, which is why she looks confused, then surprised, then happy. She’s suddenly remembering a person who is very important to her, who she had forgotten (likely due to the timey-wimey/doorway weirdness of the Anomaly) and all of her memories coming back is what causes this reaction.

I’m reasonably certain that there won’t be any romantic attachment between them. As much as I’d love it, I just don’t see the show making Octavia explicitly sapphic so late in the game. One of the consequences of trying to create a world where sexual orientation doesn’t matter is that the writers tend to beat us over the head with what type of person each character is attracted to - that’s why we see Clarke and Niylah together multiple times, and why Clarke and Cillian got together. The writers want us to remember, always, without subtlety, that Clarke likes both men and women.

We just haven’t seen any real clues that Octavia is attracted to women. As much as I’m pulling for it, it’s clear that the writers intend her relationship with Niylah to be platonic.

So, given all of that, I just don’t think Hope and Octavia will be a romantic couple.

That only leaves us with so many options - either they were friends or like family. Given the weirdness of Diyoza going into the Anomaly pregnant and her fully grown daughter stepping out of it three days later, my money is on like family. I think Octavia and Diyoza raised Hope together in the Anomaly, somehow, and that’s how they know each other.

16. How do you think it all will end?:

I think it will have a lot to do with the backdoor pilot, how much that retcons, and how committed they are to giving this show a satisfying ending when they’ve already creatively moved on to a new world.

If I pretend I don’t know about the backdoor pilot, I’m even less sure. I’m hoping for a satisyfing ending. Not a happy one. I don’t think that would be true to the series.

I’m betting either Clarke or Bellamy dies, and my money has been on Bellamy for awhile. Call it a gut feeling.

I think almost everyone else will survive. We’ve lost a lot of people along the way in this show, and I think they’ll give us one Big Death of the season, so that death has the greatest impact. And since I’m betting on it being Bellamy, well... that means I’m pretty sure everyone else will make it.

There’s been a lot of little background info dropped about how impossible life on Sanctum is without constant maintenance, and most if not all of that maintenance came from the more-or-less free labor of the people serving the Primes. It’s impossible to know how things will go in terms of Emori and Murphy being Primes now, and how long that will last. Because of that, and because of the “doorway” to another world that the Anomaly allegedly is, I’m betting Sanctum is not our final destination. I’m thinking we’ll end up on Earth again, somehow.

I hope it ends with everyone who survives together, and happy, and with a plan for a sustainable society that doesn’t murder each other every two months.

Tagging: @boomheda @awesomenell65 @captainwilldameron @blodkru @dylanobrienisbatman @teeandsnowflakes and anyone else who I normally tag, I’m honestly drawing a blank rn. The usual “please steal this” rules apply!

#tag games #the 100 #the 100 s7 #the 100 speculation #stephspeaks #long post

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bellamygateoldblog · 4 years

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The 100 Aesthetic/Preferences Tag

Tagged by: @blodreina-noumou ty babe!!

This is a tag game about AESTHETICS, not content, plot, characterization, etc. Just keep that in mind.

Rank the seasons from favorite to least favorite:

2 > 1 > 3 > 5 > 4 (me, petty: *won’t even put 6 on the ranking*)

2 - I think 2 has Octavia’s best look, very ‘Grounder In Training’ which was really really cute lol. Then there was the beginning of Clarke’s desent into grime, from pristine princess to getting weighed down with the dirt of her own emotions and percieved obligations and I liked to see it.

1 - everyone is clean and baby-faced and it reminds me of a simpler time. Was a fan of guard!Bellamy hair gel and all, it really brought out the douche in him. This season has my favourite Raven (she GLOWS) and Clarke Sky Babe looks. Jasper’s goggles. Dropship site was iconic.

3 - I appreciated the grimy aesthetic of season three because they really committed to the Goin’ Thru It.

The drastic shift in Jasper’s look was something I really liked. His boyish features are gone and now merely a ghost of innocence remains, in it’s place we have a more mature, hardened demeanor in the form of facial hair and a lack of cute, floppy hairstyle.

5 - we got the spacekru ‘clan’ look! In previous seasons we’ve seen clans have markers indicating who they belong to, Trikru with their earthy colours and wearing leaves, Azgeda with their furs and white paints, and Floukru with their ocean imagery, and now we see the survivors of apocalypse in their bluish-grey space tones styled in a way that makes it absolutely clear they’re all apart of the same group. We see a new headscarf for Emori, still very much herself but refashioned. And no glove! She’s completely comfortable with her new family. The scarf was very unique to her character so someone tell me why after all this they completely threw it out for season 6? Oh yeah it’s because season 6 isn’t real, it didn’t happen, I do Not See It.

All the boys glo-ed up. Loved that. All the girls started wearing their hair looser, Raven has her two strands sneaking out of her signature ponytail- she still very much looks like ‘Raven’ but everyone just in general looks more relaxed, like they’ve had a breather. In terms of the world, I loved the stark differences in the three main locations, and every one of them felt haunting but in different ways. Ghost lands. The wasteland of 5 was almost reminicent of the desert back in season 2, now devistated. The bunker was suffocating and chilling. The valley felt weirdly sinister in all it’s colours.

4 - eventually everyone looked peak skaikru, no longer delinquents in their various multi-coloured bomber jackets, marking their youth, but fully-fledged members of their group. I liked the way s4 almost paralleled s1 in look, they’re all wearing the same colours, but while they are all technically clean, they still look less presentable and exhausted compared to S1. Bellamy, again, like in season 1, is in his guard uniform but it’s more an upgraded and more mature version. In a way it looked like we came full circle. And Clarke and Octavia both going back to a more skaigirl hairstyle was the cherry on top. Luna’s costumes are probably my favourites on the entire show. I have no idea how we went from costumes of such intricasy and consistency to...’what in the name of halloween store clearance sale is that?’ in season 6.

6 - sanctum’s costumes were literally so ugly i don’t even wanna talk about it please don’t make me do it...

ok i go

1) Controversial ik but Emori’s Prime dress missed the mark. I liked the addition of the cape, but, again, it was so bare otherwise. There was no embroidery, no jewels, and the accessories they did give her were clunky and looked cheap. It looked too prom night. She was supposed to be royalty. And she didn’t look like it at all.

2) Absolutely hated the fact they put a pound of makeup on each of the space sisters’ faces. And the fact they gave them all unnaturally curled hair. Meanwhile Clarke and Octavia still somewhat look natural and ordinary so...what’s going on? And why?

Rank Clarke’s hair each season from best to worst:

1 > 6 > 2 > 4 > 5 > 3

some thoughts;

Not a fan of her season 4 hair, and i can’t articulate my dislike very well but why’d her roots get so dark? She never had dark roots in season 1, this character is a natural blonde, and yet over the seasons they became progressively darker and tbh? It started to irritated me. Also I don’t think the cut framed her face quite right? SOMETHING okay? Something about it......

Rank Bellamy’s hair/beard each season from best to worst:

3 > 1,2,4,6 < 5

The real debate: Bellamy in the blue shirt or the tan?

They both look the same to me. lol. Blue.

Clarke’s blue dress or pink dress?

Neither. Both weren’t very good looking. If you were holding me at gun point I’d say blue, but the cut did the opposite of help. And if they were gonna have a moment where Clarke, oblivious to her own *ethereal beauty* and not like the other girls, walks down the stairs ready to throw her hair into a messy bun and get sold to One Direction, they could’ve at least put her in a more suitable dress. Something a bit more glamourous, sophisticated, something to justify the 10 people in the room staring up at her in awe. It’s such a casual, tasteless dress? And she isn’t even wearing shoes? She isn’t wearing anything shiny, she didn’t do anything to her hair. We saw what other dresses and accessories Delilah had in her closet, the yellow and pink soft-flowing, feminine classy dresses and the pretty headwear she wore in her own short time in the season. But you give Clarke, your protagonist, that unflattering one? One that she so clearly hastily threw on and headed out in? She got two outfit changes, while none of the other main girls got any at all, and they were both ugly LIKE what was even the point?

Favorite Raven season: Her season 1 baby face just cannot be beat, she looks beautiful. And I only use that word very particularly.

Raven’s ark vest or red bomber jacket?

how about that red popper shirt from season 4

Raven’s ponytail or her s6 look?

Ponytail. It’s Raven. S6 look betrayed what her character was about.

Favorite Octavia season: 2! I love the baby grounder look.

Octavia’s hair in s2 (the braids) or s4 (the ponytail)?

The braids just because they were more interesting to look at.

Blodreina or Skairipa?

Blodreina. Like I said somewhere up there ^ that whole costume was a breath of fresh air.

Favorite Murphy season: S5!

Murphy with long hair or short hair?

I appreciated the rat boy look while it lasted, but the short hair makes him look good, while his other hairstyles pretty much were just there to contribute to the climate of his character.

Favorite Monty season: 5. Bout time they made him look grown. He’s actually a pretty ruthless and passive aggressive kid, the fact he looked so sweet in previous seasons really tricked a lot of the fanbase into believing he was some tiny cinnamon roll.

Favorite overall episode: I’m awful at seperating episodes. I just can’t do it lol

Favorite scene of all time: I just don’t have the best memory for these things. I quite liked the reveal of Blodreina, the transition is takes from Cooper in the very first arena fight to current day, and it switches from blue to red, and slowly reveals Blodreina. The music change gave me chills. Everything about the scene just felt really dark and eery. I was uncomfortable. And I loved it.

Biggest wish for s7: Visually/aesthetically, decide which style you’re going for. I’ve said this before somewhere but Sanctum was a confusing mess of sci-fi, royal, prom night, and divergent amity. Pick one and get back to me.

I want a better designed world. I want all the set and costume designers to actually communicate and work together to make the world look like something professional and not a cosplay convention on a cheap set with a big paper mache castle.

Also I’d love for all the girls to not be all dolled-up. Give Raven her ponytail back, I’ll even settle for the low pony. Give Emori her headscarf back. And go get them all some face wipes. Maybe give someone other than Clarke an oppurtunity to wear something besides their murder gear. And maybe make that something actually good looking. Put some effort in. Sheesh.

I don’t follow many people and most of the ones I do are hibernating lol. I fully encourage someone to steal this. But in the meantime: @johnmurphysreddit @awesomenell65

#the 100 #tag game

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yiangchen · 4 years

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dgmw octavia was terrible during and post-bunker, like genuinely awful. And I'm not excusing that but what she did is comparable to the mt.weather genocide and bellamy's genocide - both of which i think are terrible. But pre-bunker, if my sibling got my partner, or the most important person in my life killed, I'd be pretty pissed at them. I don't get what makes octavia so much worse than all the others?

okay, so i have talked about this a lot on my blog, so i’m not gonna go too in depth here. i’ll try to keep it short. (lmao, i tried, but it got long anyway.)

so, to start off, there’s this widespread belief in the 100 fandom that bellamy got lincoln killed, and it’s just…NOT TRUE. the only reason so many people believe it is that o/ctavia consistently blamed him for it and the narrative was framed so that we would be sorry for her (since she had “lost the love of her life”) and therefore, everything she did, even her gross treatment of bellamy, was justified.

first, she beat him bloody for lincoln’s death and said he was dead to her (3x10). then, she gaslighted him about all of s3a (3x11), which i’m not gonna get into (but if you want to know what i mean by that, i have an extensive post about this somewhere on my blog. i’m sure you’ll find it if you search my ‘octagon’ tag). when bellamy brought lincoln’s body back to arkadia for the funeral, o/ctavia looked right at him while crying with a clear you did this look on her face (3x12). she smacked lincoln’s book out of bellamy’s hand, told him lincoln was dead because of him, and made him flinch because she had a stick in her hand and he probably feared she’d hit him again (3x13). after thinking she was dead and saving her from the ark as it burned, she told him she died the day he killed lincoln and that the only reason he was still alive was because he was her brother, so in other words, she would have killed him if they weren’t related (4x06). that is five times that o/ctavia blamed bellamy for lincoln’s death.

now, let’s look at the canon facts of why lincoln died. there were a number of people involved: lincoln (who turned himself in), pike (his executioner) and o/ctavia (yes, you heard me right). bellamy is not one of them. and the reason that o/ctavia is on the list of people is the same reason that bellamy isn’t, and that is that she drugged him, chained him up in a cave, and did not let him help her. bellamy is one of the smartest people on this show. he infiltrated mount weather. he was pike’s right hand man (until lincoln, kane and sinclair were sentenced to death) and he could have, without a doubt, outsmarted pike and saved all three of them. he had a plan to save them. he came to o/ctavia with that plan. she refused. and she prevented him, the most valuable person they had on their side, from helping. so, when lincoln dies, i don’t see how bellamy is possibly at fault. obviously o/ctavia didn’t mean for this to happen and she didn’t think it would. she thought she didn’t need bellamy, but the thing is, she did need him and lincoln’s death was indirectly her fault because of that. so, she doesn’t get to beat bellamy half to death and blame him for something that is not his fault. you can argue he played some part in it for ever supporting pike, but then you’d also have to blame monty and bryan who, unlike bellamy, were actually given a chance to prove themselves and allowed to help with the rescue mission.

did bellamy aid in a massacre of 300 grounders in a preemptive attack because he thought it would save his people? yes.

did bellamy help get lincoln, kane and sinclair arrested for committing treason? yes.

did bellamy want them to be sentenced to death? hell fucking no.

he didn’t. this is quite literally bellamy’s turning point. it’s the moment he turns on pike. bellamy only followed him because he thought he was protecting their people. the second pike decided to sentence three of their people to death, bellamy was done following pike, and as i said, he came to o/ctavia with a plan and she not only refused his help but chained him up so he couldn’t do anything.

i love bellamy (he’s my favorite character), so i guess you could argue that i’m not being fair to o/ctavia. that she had no reason to trust him, and therefore, drugging him and chaining him up make sense and it’s justifiable, and well…that would be a fair point if not for a very important fact that most people in this fandom forget, and that is that o/ctavia took no issue in bryan helping. bryan, who switched sides at the exact same time as bellamy. bryan, who aided in the massacre alongside bellamy and pike. bryan, who was a part of the same regime that got lincoln, kane and sinclair arrested.

so, it makes zero sense that she is so untrusting of bellamy that she drugs him and chains him up and is never shown, not once, to be untrusting of bryan in any way, shape or form. it’s…one of the many plot holes of s3 and only serves as an excuse to make bellamy the bad guy.

however, even though i hated it, and it didn’t make any sense, i will give o/ctavia this. i would have been fine if that’s all that had happened. this show has a lot of questionable things happening, so i can’t say drugging bellamy and chaining him up would have been the deal breaker for me with o/ctavia, but what she did to him while five other people, including his father figure, just stood there and watched (aside from miller, bless his soul) is the most disgusting thing i have ever seen on tv. it takes a truly sick and twisted person to do what o/ctavia did to her brother, the person who loved and cared and sacrificed for her every day of his fucking life and who would never ever lay a hand on her or defend himself. and it only got worse. because the writers refused to ever talk about the beating again even though bellamy had scars on his face from it for eight fucking episodes (and normally scars do not last that long on this show.) and o/ctavia would not let up with the fucking gaslighting. as a bellamy stan, i remember bellamy’s s4 arc like it was yesterday, and so much of it was influenced by o/ctavia’s abuse in s3 and 4, it’s insane. no…it’s tragic, especially since the culmination of it was o/ctavia (the abuser) forgiving him (the victim).

but to get back to your question. what makes o/ctavia worse than the others? the abuse. there is a huge difference between harming/torturing/killing strangers and abusing your loved ones. o/ctavia is the only character on this show who has consistently abused her loved ones FOR SEASONS and been yet to be called out for it. she was called out for a lot of things in s6 but never the abuse of her loved ones specifically in s3 and 4. it is a HUGE part of her story that is never addressed by the writers. of course other characters have slapped, electrocuted, etc. people that they love, but unlike o/ctavia, these actions are not repeated for seasons. these actions are not followed with gaslighting and emotional abuse that shape the victim’s entire arc like o/ctavia’s gaslighting and emotional abuse shaped bellamy’s arc.

anyway, sorry this got long, and i hope this answers your question. i’m actually really glad you asked me this!! i feel like i have most of my thoughts on this issue all in one place now.

#bellamy blake #octagon #the 100

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pendragaryen · 5 years

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the 100 ask game

tagged by @carrieeve

1. What station on the Ark would you be from?

Farm station

2. What would you get arrested for on the Ark?

Mh, I really don’t know...

3. Would you take off your wristband when you landed on the ground?

4. What would the necklace Finn would make for you look like? (Clarke: deer/Raven: a raven duh..)

Ha! We wouldn’t have had THAT kind of relationship so that he’d feel he have to make me something like this...

5. If you could resurrect any MINOR character who would it be?

probably Zoe Monroe

6. Create a squad of 5 characters to go on missions with. Who are they?

Bellamy, Clarke, Raven, Monty and Harper (or after Marper’s death... Murphy and Emori)

7. What Grounder Clan would you belong to you?

Floukru or Trikru? But... thinking about it... most likely Trishanakru

8. What would your name be in Trigedasleng? (example: Octavia=Okteivia…just make it up!)

I lol’d... Sorry.. But I don’t think you can make ANYTHING out of Anne... Anne kom Trishanakru... ;)

9. Thoughts on Finn? Some people hate him, and others love him, so I’m curious

Um... Blank space tbh. He was too unimportant for me to hate or love him. Only in relation to Raven and/or Clarke of course... What he did was disgusting.

10. Be honest. How willing would you have been to take the chip without knowing all the horrible things it does?

Tbqh... I don’t know. Maybe... if my friends would’ve taken it too. I’d like to say that I’d be strong enough to refuse it. But seriously, I have no clue what I’d have done in that particular situation.

11. What character do you relate to most?

S1-4: Bellamy. Since S5: Clarke.

12. What character do you like the least?

Deep sigh... I go with E/ho here. I didn’t like her back in S2 and I can’t bring myself to like her since.

13. Describe your delinquent outfit. (Would you wear something like Murphy’s jacket with the spikey red shoulder patch or have a trademark like Jasper’s goggles? Be creative, yet practical)

black leggings, boots, long shirt with some kind of a big leather belt, fitted leather or denim jacket, ragged scarf ... something like that and definitely nothing special

14. Favorite type of mutant animal?

The two-headed dear... if you can possibly speak of FAVORITES here... unf...

15. What would your job be on the Ark?

Um... I think i’d be some kind of a librarian... maybe... Or I’m just tending to plants...

16. Would you have willingly pumped Ontari’s heart if Abby asked?

Oh god... Not as a concious decision. But if I would have shut down all of my thoughts at that particular moment... i’d probably just ACT...

17. If Lexa wasn’t Heda, but she was still alive then who would have made the best commander?

Out of the Nightbloods? Um... I don’t know many of these. Later on: Madi. Probably.

18. How would you act if you ate the hallucinogenic nuts like Jasper and Monty?

I’d probably be laughing ALL THE TIME and over the most stupid things

19. How would you have dealt with Charlotte’s crime? A more John Murphy approach or Bellamy Blake approach?

I go with Bellamy here

20. Who should have been the Chancellor, if anyone?

Um oh god... I think... Abby? Back in the time of the ark/Arkadia. And/or rather Kane than Jaha.

21. Would you have been on Pike’s side like Bellamy or on Kane’s side? Or Clarke in Polis?

I would’ve been on Kane’s side

22. Mount Weather had a lot of modern commodities. (example: Maya’s Ipod) What is the one thing you would snatch while there?

Haha... Dunno... I LOVE music. So i’d probs go with an MP3-player too. ;)

23. What would your Grounder tattoos look like? Hairstyle? War paint?

No war paint. But tattoos. Maybe some climbing plants like ivy or something like that - but in black and white of course. On my arms and neck and reaching out onto my cheek. Oh and I like the hairstyle Octavia had back in S2. Something like that maybe.

24. Favorite quote?

Clearly “Who we are and who we need to be to survive are very different things”. Nothing fits the whole show better that these words imo.

25. If all of the characters were in the Hunger Games, who would have the best shot at winning?

Out of ALL characters? As much as I’d LOVE to say Bellamy... but.. Um... Probs Indra or Luna. Out of our delinquents: Octavia. Otherwise: Maybe Diyoza. Just a feeling...

26. Least favorite ship? Favorite canon ship? Favorite non canon ship? NOT INCLUDING CL OR BC OR BE

Least fave: I am prohibited to mention that (see above). Fave canon: Marper. Fave non-canon: Sea Mechanic (Raven/Luna)

27. A song that should be included in the next season? If there had to be another guest star like Shawn Mendes on the show, who would you want to make a cameo?

Depends on the plot what kind of song I’d like to hear. In regards to my fave pairing/ship... probably “Rewrite the stars” performed by James Arthur. I just LOVE this song so so much...

28. What would you do if you were stuck in the bunker with Murphy for all that time?

The bunker huh? I have no idea. Do you mean the Wonkru-bunker or the bunker/tower he was imprisoned by Jaha/Alie? As for the latter: Seriously. How should it be possible to shut him out of your life completely? It simply WON’T WORK. So... I think we’d probably doing all the weird and funny things that are available (games, karaoke, drinking and so on) and then I’d take my things and search for an empty, silent space just for myself. Just a place to retire to sometimes.

29. You’re an extra that gets killed off. How do you die?

I wouldn’t have survived praimfaya. That’s for sure. I’d have been burned to ashes. Before that: Probably hit by a grounder spear.

30. A character you’d like to learn more about and get flashbacks of?

Always Emori. She’s such an interesting character. And all the new characters that will appear in S6.

31. A character you’d bang?

Is that even a question......... Big B of course. Captain daddy can come @ me all the time. ;)

32. Would you stay in the Bunker? Go up to Space? Or live on your own in Eden?

Definitely Eden

33. In the Bunker, would you follow Octavia? What would you do to pass the time underground?

Lol what kind of a question is that... i would HAVE to follow blodreina... she’d throw me in the pits if i don’t... And ugh... I’d probably read mountains of books - if there should’ve been some down there...

34. What crime would you commit in the Bunker that lands you in the fighting pits?

Refusing to eat my fellow peeps...

35. Up in Space, who would you bond with first? Who would be the most difficult for you to get along with?

I’d probs be friends with Harper and Monty, as well as with Bellamy. I’d have my difficulties with Murphy and Echo, I’m pretty sure of that...

36. How long do you think you would last on Earth by yourself?

Not as long as Clarke

37. When the Eligius ship lands what do you do?

run and hide

38. Favorite Eligius character? Least favorite?

Diyoza is impressive. I admire her. I LOVE(D) Shaw tho... Least fave: Obviously McCreary.

39. Would you Spacewalk?

Yesssss!

40. Would you prefer to eat Windshield Bugs, Space Algae, or Bunker Meat?

Waaahh! THE ALGAE OF COURSE! *shudders *

41. Would you start a war for the last spot of green on earth? What would your solution be to avoid it?

I’m not a warrior. Never was. I’d probably try to negotiate some kind of peace with the enemy. Like Bellamy said at some point in S5: Everyone its little space of Eden to grow something on your own...-ish ;)

42. Would you rather dig out flesh-eating worms or stick thumb drives into bullet holes?

If I HAVE to choose here... The thumb drive...

43. Are you willing to poison your sister for the Traitor Who You Love? What would you do to stop Octavia?

Oh god... THAT’S hard... I do have a sister who is very, very dear to me. I can’t possibly imagine to poison her... I can’t compare her to O though, bc I was never separated from her for 6 long years - nor is she like a blodreina (NO-ONE is like blodreina... >.<). Bellamy said he did it (amongst other obvious reasons) bc he wanted to save her from herself. Maybe... if she would have gone too far, too... and the life of MY greatest love would be on stake... I’d do it. But no... I don’t wanna think about that.

As for what I’d do to stop Octavia... I don’t have any better idea either. That’s the problem here. *sigh *

44. Would you go to sleep in cryo or stay awake like Marper?

I’d only prefer to stay awake, if I’d have the love of my life by my side like Harper did, and if it would’ve been his choice too. Otherwise: Cryo.

45. Who are you waking up first to explore the new planet?

Bellamy, Clarke, Raven, Abby and/or Jackson

I’ve tagged so many of you peeps out there in things over the last weeks and I’m sorry in advance if you should’ve done this already. But this is SO INTERESTING ;) So here we go, I tag: @iishallbelieve, @thgbookprincess, @junebugninja, @fen-ha-fuck-you, @katersann, @lovethyblakes, @clarkgriffon, @tracylorde, @jasperjoordan, @jordanjaspergreen, @hostagetakerandhisgirlfriend, @hereforbobmorley, @clarkeywifey, @bellarkekomlovekru, @bellaarke, @arkadianbellamy, @lameblake, @peterstarkss, @sometimesrosy, @bellamys11thfreckle, @lostinbellamy, @asroarke, @grumpybell, @kingbobbymorley, @bobmorleyisking, @octannibal-blake, @pilotzaven, @ringsabellamy, @little-oxford-st, @diyozas (in no particular order)

#tagged #carrieeve #thank you #the 100 ask game #the 100 #just me #me #my edit #ask game #text post #information #personal

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oimatchstickman · 4 years

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Personally I have some probs w/ the SM era but I tag all of it when I rarely reblog it. People that wanna get into fights are annoying. It’s easy to filter. And It’s ur blog- you should have fun with it. And I may not agree with everything you post but that’s on me to better check you out. Keep fighting the Tentoo fight 😘

Which is fine! I’d never tell anyone that they’re wrong for liking or disliking a certain era of the show- and I’m always appreciative when people tag their stuff related to their dislike of the era so I don’t have to see it.

What annoys me is what is basically going on with the Tentoo thing on the Wiki- people being obtuse about something when there’s a lot of evidence that a given point/view is just completely wrong given what actually happens in the show. Like to expand upon my example in the tags: Basically someone said that 11 commits genocide/has the human race commit genocide in s6 with the Silence. This is just blatantly untrue for several reasons but just for 2 examples, 1: That 11 specifically says “Today is the day the human race kicks you off their planet” (by giving them no choice but to leave) and 2: There’s very clearly Silence still around and kicking in Time of the Doctor.

I spent a LOT of time getting into debates about this stuff before I learned to go through people’s tags a bit better before following and before I lost any qualms about unfollowing people for whatever reason. So... yeah, basically why I’m able to type up multi-paragraph arguments with clear and specific in-show/book/audio drama examples- especially ones that might get glossed over on a first watch/listen/read haha.

#Anonymous #question on the psychic paper

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wait-atick · 6 years

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Day 7:

Share your story. Well, okay then. I’m not sure mine will be any of the most interesting, but... that’s how it is sometimes.

@sheithparticipationweek I’m one of the older people out there in the fandom, one of the ones who ran off the school bus back in the day to try not to miss the beginning of Voltron when it was airing on the local UHF station (yeah. we’re still alive). Fast forward **handovermouthmumble** years, and I’m heavily into quite a few other fandoms - haven’t thought of Voltron in a long time except for an occasional burst of nostalgia. I was aware of the reboot, but I hadn’t given it much thought beyond “Hey, that’s cool. I loved that show!” I happened to have a VERY long bus commute to and from work for a few years, and I found myself without reading material one day. Time to open AO3, for sure. <aside.> ((Now, I was mostly meandering around the Dragon Age fandom at this point, and had found a story I loved with a modern AU, but there was a problem - there were only THREE CHAPTERS, and IT WAS VERY UNFINISHED, and... ended on an enormous cliffhanger. Ugh. (The author had moved along, and I had been salty for probably a good year about it at this point. Hey, I’m old. I’m allowed to hold grudges - I was cranky about the reboot pulling the author away form the story I WANTED TO READ!).)) </aside.> So, in a fit of desperation (because who wants to risk talking to other bus people, am I right?), as I did love the author’s writing, I went to see what other stories had been written.

Apparently a soft spot grew in my chest that day, I reminded myself that I did love those stupid lion robots as a kid, and I decided to open up the Longest Fic The Author Had under the Voltron Tag. And... I was fucking done. Head. Over. Heels. I remembered enough to know who was who, but... things were Very Different. Wait... Galra Keith? What? Blade... of...? But... Color me ridiculously confused, and spending the next week pouring over Wikis, one tab open on a story, the other on whichever character I was re-familiarizing myself with, flipping back and forth... and so it continued. I branched off into other fics, other authors. And fate stepped in a few months past that (or more accurately, a “PLZ COME BACK AND PAY US MONEY TO SEE STUFF” email from Netflix. “30 days free...”, they whispered. “No commitment!”), and I am weak. So, at that point, I dubbed it my Netflix Shame account, and said nothing to Anyone. I began watching VLD while I was at work (I have a super chill job, and so long as you’re working and putting out quality, they could care less about what’s on your headphones). About 20 minutes in to The Rise of Voltron - I was lost. Completely, totally lost. I got on board pretty quickly with the new characterizations, and the changes in dynamics. That rescue? Oh Fuck Yes. A++ So, I guess what I’m going to do here, is bring myself back around to Rec A Fic Day: Thank you @fenri / Glossolalia for Picosecond & ASF specifically, and all of your writing in a more general sense. I was sheith-biased from day one, of course (just look at my frame of reference), but as I watched, I realized that was the ship that made the most sense. There was so much going unsaid between these two, and so much history (thank you DW/JDS/et al) that has been sketched out. The framing of so many of their interactions could be out of any tragic romance setups in literary/film history, and I can’t help but think that if it was not a m/m pairing, people would be ALL OVER IT. The last few shots of S3E5? No way that’s not love. Not a chance.

SO! Here I sit, waiting to cry over S6. I’m terrified that two of the cast have stated flat out that recording this season had them breaking down in the booth. I can’t wait.

#day 7 #sheith participation week #guess i'm outing myself #kinda #long post is fucking long

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jennycalendar · 6 years

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2017 fic roundup

tagged by the incredible @catty-words!! which is a delight bc 1) cori is amazing and 2) i LOVE talking about my writing. so here goes

Total 2017 Word Count: 252,499 (.......that’s a lot wow) Total 2017 Hits: 7,515 Other 2017 AO3 Stats: Kudos: 653; Comment threads: 197; Bookmarks: 76; Subscriptions: 49.

Total 2016 Word Count: 61,766 (oh my GOD in COMPARISON i wrote. so much this year) Total 2016 Hits: 4,651 Other 2016 AO3 Stats: Kudos: 360; Comment threads: 55; Bookmarks: 38; Subscriptions: 15.

links and titles to 2017 works

i wrote. um. a lot. like a lot. didn’t realize how much until i had to compile an actual list and now it’s like....wow.

orpheus (4,721 words) that one time i wrote a giles/jenny orpheus & eurydice au. set during....s5-ish? i had fun with this

determination unmatched (1,576 words) set during school hard; ft. giles and jenny in the library and jenny panicking over her Commitment Issues.

the sunnydale high mortality rate (1,722 words) i’m PRETTY sure i wrote this in 2016 for jenny calendar day, but i posted it again as a standalone in january so. still counts sort of. jenny’s musings on life and death in sunnydale.

on gambles (5,577 words) a tara/faith au of the office; tara is a shy receptionist and faith is a flirty paper salesgirl.

bravery (50,445 words) IM GETTING NOSTALGIC because last time i did this fic roundup thing my goal for 2017 was to finish bravery??? and then i did??? and it was beautiful??? fjsfsdljk do i even need to summarize this fic; u all heard me talking about it at Some point or another....it’s a giles/jenny becoming au. i reread it recently and i feel like i’ve really improved since then, but it was a landmark fic for me and the first multi-chapter fic with a complex plot that i actually finished (and last lmao whoops). i love it still

first steps (5,740 words) the follow-up to bravery!! set during dead man’s party. kinda fluffy & pointless but it was still super fun to write

second chances (9,371 words) oh boy this fic is the only one from early 2017 that i’m still genuinely really proud of. set during s6; jenny comes back as a ghost, and only anya can see her.

impromptu vigil for the dead scooby mom (3,226 words) jenny dies in chosen instead of in passion, and giles copes.

missing (13,402 words) s3 jenny, from a world where giles died, forms an accidental supernatural connection with s3 giles.

conscious choices (6,708 words) MY CHEESY ROM-COM FIC. i love this one so much so much so much. told through emails, phone calls, and texts, giles and jenny fall in love (again, sort of) in s4 when jenny comes back into town.

mermaid magic (13,140 words) some anon sent me an ask once upon a time re: jenny as a mermaid and that ask spiraled into a lot of asks and then a tag on my blog and finally this fic. it was inevitable, really.

grand romantic gestures (10,558 words) this was without a doubt my secret masterpiece of 2017. femslash calendiles, set after passion. while attempting to cope with jenny’s death, gil stumbles across something surprising, and then things just start spiraling from there.

restraint (4,305 words) a prequel to on gambles, though they could be read in any order. faith attends the dundies and pines over tara (though she definitely doesn’t want to call it pining). also there is of course some jenny/giles content because i’m Me

forever (4,031 words) kind of still in progress?? various femslash oneshots (faith/tara, willow/buffy, and willow just being a lesbian in general)

irredeemable evil (5,919 words) jenny tries to get used to being a vampire. giles is desperately in love.

on heroes (6,054 words) look i GET that slayers have to be the one-girl-in-all-the-world thing but i hate the cpr scene with romantic undertones so like. i wrote this. with semi-gratuitous mostly-platonic jenny/giles because i’m Me.

fortune favors the bold (2,768 words) jackaby fic!!!! for my traumatized ghost girl and her mess of a paranormal detective boyfriend, who both very clearly have no idea how functioning relationships work, but they love each other so they muddle through. written before i read book 4 bc i was afraid jackaby and jenny wouldn’t get a canonical love declaration & kiss. everyone please read jackaby 4 me

loving parents (6,259 words) am i ever going to finish this? who knows? giles and jenny are expecting a baby in some alternate v happy s5. literally just scooby shenanigans and wish fulfillment.

closeness (1,532 words) my headcanon for giles and jenny’s first kiss!! soft and tentative.

friends with extras (788 words) leverage; sophie/nate and pillow talk. not my best work and i don’t think i really Got their dynamic, but i think someday i might return to write fic for them? maybe? canon gave me so much already so i don’t really feel the need.

many kinds of magic (2,394 words) my favorite thing about this fic is the fact that i felt 0 need to explain why jenny was alive. she’s just There. willow and tara fall in love, aided gently by jenny. except not really bc lbr willow and tara need NO help to fall in love, so jenny just listens and offers advice.

imperfections (76,843 words) someday i really will come back to this. maybe. hopefully. i wrote it while i was sorting through Sad Feelings and i don’t......have.....those feelings anymore, which is Excellent for me but kinda bad for this fic. anyway. faith and jenny form a friendship in s3 (or: a braveryverse rewrite of season 3 where jenny is alive).

pint-size potential (7,212 words) the first fic in what will hopefully be a series of short fics!! giles is charged with the care of baby buffy summers, a potential who isn’t likely to become a slayer (according to the council).

adapting (3,327 words) sequel to pint-size potential! giles adjusts to his life in sunnydale; buffy throws things and gets excited about animals

inevitability (4,881 words) post-chosen faith/buffy; soft and hesitant and frightened but both of them are still determined to try.

Favorite Fic: DEFINITELY grand romantic gestures. like i love all these fics (and i feel like the calendiles day fics were some of my best. jenny as a sarcastic smitten mermaid??? giles and jenny passive-aggressively emailing?? jenny and buffy forming a tentative friendship over the fact that they both loved giles???) but grand romantic gestures was swoony and gorgeous and sapphic and incredibly romantic. i’m so so proud of it and i want it to get Lots of attention but it. does not. so like...please go read & review

Hardest Fic: definitely missing, because i was writing it under time constraints and i felt like it wasn’t good enough the whole time. but it surprised me by turning out to be really nice!! i went back and reread it and. solid work celia.

Do You Plan to Take Prompts in 2018? oh totally!! i don’t know if i’ll Complete them but i’m definitely down to take them.

What was the best thing about 2017? wow this is hard. this is hard and i really like that this is hard. the best thing about 2017 is 100% that i cannot decide what the best thing about 2017 is. i have a lot of options and a lot of friends and a lot of happy things that i did not have last year. i feel very good about that.

What was the worst thing about 2017? that i didn’t Actually meet robia. but there were so many good things that balanced it out!!

Any last thoughts for 2017? i’ve been saying for a while that 2017 felt like a stepping-stone year towards something better for me, but i think it was actually a damn good year as a whole. i think i need to stop thinking of things as a journey towards happiness and start just...enjoying whatever journey i’m on.

Goals for 2017

FINISH THE TOP-SECRET DETECTIVE AU and find a title and start posting it!! it’s intricate and gorgeous and i can't wait to show it to u all

write more femslash!!!!

stop telling myself i’m not writing enough. i was telling myself that all this year aND I WROTE OVER 250,000 words SO CLEARLY I AM DOING PRETTY DAMN WELL WHEN I’M NOT EVEN TRYING

tagging @regenderate and um i’m not sure if i can think of other people that cori didn’t tag?? i love my small corner of the buffy fandom but it’s. difficult 4 tagging people. so like if u see this ur tagged congrats

#tagging meme #fic roundup #LOOK. LOOK AT ALL THE FIC I WROTE #EXCITING #(pls do go read grand romantic gestures....or my new fic....start my 2018 off right)

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thelillykane · 7 years

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for the salty ask meme #6 #1 #4 #5 and #12 Just pour all the salt, jennie!

oh my god i just refound this in my ask box so sit tight i’m gonna try & answer real quick~~~

1. What OTPs in your fandom(s) do you just not get? + 4. Do you have a NoTP in your fandom? Are they a popular OTP?

as always, the answer is l*cas and p*yton like!!! it doesn’t make sense to me AT ALL how people ship this couple and consider them to be like soulmates when l*cas spends half of season one, all of seasons 2 & 3, half of season four, and the majority of season five being blatantly and vocally in love with other women* (mostly brooke but then in season five he’s literally engaged to and planning to marry lindsay and um friendly reminder kids that he’s not the one that calls off the wedding!!! he’s not at the altar going “yeah i love p*yton” he’s literally…devastated when lindsay leaves him and he even tries to win her back but like sure ok i guess he loves p*yton)

also, like…p*yton literally only wants to date him the second he becomes unavailable which isn’t even me being mean it’s just the goddamn truth!! he wants to date her in s1, she isn’t interested, and then he starts to move on (and she finds out brooke has a crush on him let’s sip that fucking tea together) and she decides she wants him!!!. and then she does the same thing in season five when he asks her to marry her and she says no so he?? moves on like anyone who got rejected would do and THAT’S WHEN SHE FLIPS HER SHIT and is like “oh well when you were eighteen-twenty you wrote a book where you promised to love me forever so you can’t get engaged to someone else even though yeah i started dating julian like a week after i said no to you”

and tHEN when they weren’t pissing me off on screen by treating everyone (brooke) like trash they were boring!!! like how tf

ALSO LISTEN the fact that not only does the show do a 180 and be like “oh lol l*cas always loved her even when he literally was repulsed by the mention of still having feelings for her” BUT THEY ALWAYS TRY TO PRETEND LIKE EVERYONE ELSE IN TREE HILL WAS WAITING FOR THEM TO BE TOGETHER AND NO ONE WAS haley – l*cas’ best friend!!!! – is vocally against them being together on like 3 fucking occasions minimum, nathan is 100189001 team brooke penelope davis, karen & keith – lucas’ PARENTS – actually take the time to get to know brooke and end up rooting for her and her happiness both individually and w/ their son and they never bother to do that w/ p*yton, skills literally calls l*cas out on his behavior and calls p*yton out on hers (re: them being shitty af) but then two eps later is all ~lol i was a fan~ when he clearly wasn’t, i could fucking go on but you see my point like…no one wanted them to be together including them

the way they treat brooke formerly gets its own bullet point because oh my god even thinking about it makes my blood boil like 98% of the time i’m fucking i’m pissed

also re: them being ~soulmates~ and they ~were meant to be together from ep 1**~ hilarie burton, who plays p*yton, literally came out in an interview this year and said that they never intended, to her knowledge, as the actress PLAYING P*YTON!!, for l*yton to end up together but that the show switched gears around season four iirc (because sophia bush wasn’t super comfortable filming endless romantic shit with her ex husband who had cheated on her which i support fully)

ALSO i could be wrong but like….i’m pretty sure l*cas kisses brooke in every season he’s a main in (the s6 is a fakeout flash forward in which he lowkey envisions himself marrying brooke and lemme tell you that sure doesn’t seem like he’s super committed to p*yton) and you can’t say the same for him and p*yton (again i might be wrong but i don’t think they kiss in season 2) and they only kiss in season 3 because peyton thinks she’s gonna die and he’s sitting right there

^ the above is arguably the pettiest bullet point on here but i don’t give a FUCK i hate this fictional couple with every atom i possess

FUCK !!!! LISTEN that stupid “you’re always saving me thing” that p*yton says to him and it’s supposed to be romantic like lol he literally didn’t even go into the school for her that day!!! like sure once he’s in there he ends up saving her but that isn’t even what he wanted to do!!! he goes into the school to try and get nathan and to make sure nathan doesn’t get hurt!! when brooke is sobbing telling him she lost track of p*yton when she was getting out of the building l*cas doesn’t get all White Knight and go in to save her he literally was gonna stay with brooke!!! who he loves!!! (there’s an instance similar to this in season one where he only ~saves~ her because he is like…around when brooke is trying to get help for p*yton and probably others too but that’s the BIG one)

ALSO OH MY GOD in season 3 when they make p*yton realize she loves l*ke again they do it in the dumbest way??? she’s literally…with j*ke and she is asleep and mumbles l*kes name and then j*ke is like “u said his name in ur sleep u don’t want to be with me” and dumps her while she’s crying and saying she flat out doesn’t love l*cas (but then she has no one else so she’s like lol what the heck i guess i will love him romantically)

and btw that^ is another instance where it wasn’t p*yton choosing to be with l*cas it was literally someone deciding NOT to be with her…which come to think of it is how they always get together? like?? they never choose to be with one another except in season one after they fucking cheat on brooke like dirtbags and then l*ke dumps brooke to be with p*yton but after that they literally..only pick each other as last resorts because they have no one else. like lmao!!! that is not my idea of grand romance otp it’s literally…sad in the pathetic, embarrassing way

*idr season six that well but i am willing to bet he does it a little bit during this season as well (also from what i remember they literally…stopped writing scenes w/ him and brooke one on one together because they knew the audience would take one look at those scenes and KNOW he still loved her and not p*yton)

also um brooke/lucas parallel nathan/haley so much so it’s just so fake whenever people try and say they weren’t the intended endgame for a while there like…look at the parallels. open your eyes.

anyway y’all i could probably keep going i am the most bitter and angry about them always and there’s literally 200+ things that are just ??? about them it’s Too Easy

oh also fandom jumo but uh piper/l*o from charmed are boring as shit they’re okay in s1-2 and after that i was like hey can we get him off my screen thanks

5. Has fandom ever ruined a pairing for you?

I don’t think “ruined” is the right term, but there are definitely some ships that I saw overhyped imo and then when I watched the show I was…underwhelmed. (I’m referring specifically to Ch*ck/S*rah when I type this because the never ending will they-won’t they was just fucking exhausting and by season 3 – which is where i am currently on hiatus – when they actually got together i just could not bring myself to care) (also she can do better and deserves better and season 3 chuck is like the worst version of him so far but)

6. Has fandom ever made you enjoy a pairing you previously hated?

not to my knowledge!

12. Is there an unpopular arc that you like that the fandom doesn’t? Why?

i was just talking about this the other day with amanda!! (i would normally tag her but she loves l*yton and i respect that so i’m not gonna make her see the seven paragraphs in which i Destroy them)

essentially we talked about how everyone needs to back up off of season three of veronica mars. like, sure, compared to seasons one and two it’s not as good, but even those seasons have stuff i don’t like such as: gross rape plots, needless and unwelcome attempts at love triangles, sidelining of POC characters for ?? reasons (it’s racism y’all, that’s the reason), sidelining of female characters for White Male Development (re: Mac not becoming a regular that season while Dick & Cassidy both did), etc. and all of those reasons are the big reasons why people shit on season three but [dennis reynolds voice] newsflash asshole! it was there the entire goddamn time

^to continue the above, i think season three has SO MANY POSITIVES AS WELL for example: logan canonically tells veronica mars that he loves her. um. that’s Good Shit. also!!!: parker lee is there, weevil working w/ keith mars for a bit, logan and veronica making out on the stairs to fidelity by regina spektor, holy fuck does veronica mars love logan echolls so much, THAT SCENE WHEN LOGAN APOLOGIZES TO VERONICA AGAIN!!, BEATS UP GORY SORKIN BECAUSE HE’S RUDE AF TO VERONICA, SHRUGS WHEN GORY THREATENS HIS LIFE, IMMEDIATELY GOES AND APOLOGIZES TO PIZ, AND THEN VERONICA WATCHES HIM WALK AWAY BEAMING WITH HEARTS IN HER EYES LIKE THAT SCENE IS IN SEASON THREE YOU GUYS IT’S RIGHT THERE and then like!!! there’s quality eps in there that i love with my whole heart~~ wichita linebacker!!! poughkeepsie tramps and thieves!!! postgame mortem!!! charlie don’t surf!!!

in summary: like…yeah parts of it were geuninely awful. just..like….the rest of the seasons. and the movie. which is like.. another Thing

also fandom jump again but uh Rory’s decision to leave Yale in season six was absolutely the right one for her to make and Lorelai is the fucking worst about it. and if Lorelai hadn’t overreacted and ostracized Rory over it Rory would’ve gone back to Yale and lot sooner and that’s what you missed on Glee

#cariebishop #jennie interacts with people #anti leyton #buffys #victoria pls come drag l*yton w me #don't look amanda

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pensbridgrton · 7 years

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there’s this post in the tags of the caroline/bonnie scene where caroline points out that the bonnie she knows would never want to be a vampire

which is completely and utterly true

and it’s still true

i honestly believe bonnie didn’t even consider that enzo may have wanted her to turn (which by the way was not the purpose of the vial at least consciously) until caroline brought it up. that’s why she gives this little face before they’re interrupted - she’s like wait a minute i haven’t actually considered this

and that’s why the conversations with enzo happen - because he’s acting strange (bc she’s mortal and that’s hitting him) and caroline put the thought into her head so she does what people do in healthy relationships - she asks him to clarify. is this vial really supposed to be a symbol or was there something else there? (and honestly i don’t think enzo meant for it to be a promise of her turning - i think he meant it to be a back-up plan in case he wasn’t there. but in the back of his mind, the whole ‘shit bonnie is mortal’ thing played an unconscious role.)

so later, when they’re dancing and talking about it - bonnie says that a year ago she would have been offended (even though she just said they’d be dating almost three years - meaning it wasn’t like they just got together and bonnie’s opinions immediately changed). and now she’s not offended by the question - bc she loves enzo and she could see a forever with him and it’s a reasonable question. but even though she wants to spend forever with him - and if that was all it meant to turn, she’d do it - THAT’S NOT ALL IT MEANS TO HER. bonnie decides that no matter how much she loves enzo, it’s not worth it. she makes that decision. and enzo respects it (it sucks and he’s sad, but he respects it, he understands it.)

and this is up for debate bc i don’t think the show was clear (bc... writers): but she wasn’t just talking about elena, in my mind - she’s talking about her magic. i do think bonnie needs to have a conversation about finding her magic again, missing it, wanting it back. i think we need solid confirmation that bonnie isn’t saying no just bc of elena, but bc she doesn’t want to lose her magic. (and if it turns out i’m wrong and without elena she wants to become a vampire - i want to see her thought process, give me confirmation that she’s doing it for the right reasons - and yeah, enzo is a decent “right reason” but i’m slightly hopeful for more - and if we don’t get more, i wouldn’t be surprised bc this is bonnie and the writers.......... yeah.)

but frankly, nothing about this episode made me suspect that bonnie bennett wasn’t making decisions true to her character and her character’s growth. bonnie bennett pre-s6 would not have even considered a romantic relationship with a vampire. but she life happened and her opinions changed and she fell for a PERSON (who happened to be a vampire) who loved her and she still didn’t want to turn. but years later, she’s still with this guy, she’s still in love with him - and this is the time in a relationship to consider commitment and how that looks like. so bonnie to be thinking about turning? that makes complete sense.

#bonenzo #bonenzo meta #i dunno anymore im gonna go hide under a rock #otp: i'm not leaving you #tvd #anti tvd writers #tbh #bc as much as i love be the writing leaves much to be desired

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