Every Friend Group Needs + Numenoreans/Southlanders me 🤝 @aadmelioraa, refusing to let this meme die

Introducing Haleborn. Wait, Celebrand?

Inspired by this post, please direct all complaints to @wanderleave, thank you for your time. Original Halbrand screencaps from the lovely @helenvader .

Tolkien: The three rings were not corrupted, because Sauron never touched them.

ROP Sauron:  Look at me, touching both the Mithril and the jewels, touchy, touchy, touch touch touch!

Come on Amazon, I know you guys are getting creative because you don’t have the rights to all of the story*, but that part about the touching is pretty well spelled out in what you do have. It’s also a very major plot point and a big deal. Can we please keep those?

*For the life of me, I can’t understand why the Tolkien estate would do that. Either give them all the rights, or no rights. Or if you want to be more cautious, give them the rights to a complete story within a story like Akallabeth. It doesn’t make sense otherwise.

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thinking about celebrimbors tits 👀😩 #brimbytiddiesupremacy

many here may be too young to remember network soap operas so good news, amazon is reviving the genre but with elves this time

Isildur: My eyes hurt.

Elendil: Did you look directly at the sun yesterday?

Isildur: No.

Elendil: That’s good-

Isildur: The moon was in the way.

I am the very model of a modern noldo-General

My arguments with vala if you ask me I have won them all

I ‘ve known the kings of Men and Elves and fought the fights historical

From Swan-haven to Anfauglith, and I've got trauma from them all.

I'm very skilled in crafting and I’ve memorized the tomes of lore

I’ve enemies and friends alike on ev’ry one of Arda’s shores

I know the darkness lingers and I’ll search neath every rock and leaf

From Lindon to Utumno with my brother’s dagger in its sheath!

The darkness took what’s mine from me, a silver tree that blazed with light

in vengeance I'll unmake their worlds, I'll kick my foes through door of night

I’ve battled will of powers great and won the day you must recall

I am the very model of a modern noldo-General!

Adar fanfic combo!

I have a new idea for fanfic about Adar! I am going to ”steal” every plot device from everyone else’s fanfic and put them all together! So Adar falls in love or has sex with or both with Sauron, Galadriel, Grugzûk, Arondir, five sexy Elf OCs, four sexy Human OCs, a Maia, and Shelob. Then Adar flees from Sauron, is tortured by Elves, finds a way to outwit Sauron, joins up enthusiastically with Sauron, is driven from Mordor, joins up reluctantly with Sauron, and is captured by Elves. Then he feels better because of true love, defeating Sauron, destroying Eregion, handing over the headaches of Uruk rule to Sauron, a good empathetic hug, escaping Sauron, finding his original Elf family, finding Sauron, good sex, having a competent therapist, having a zillion more more Uruk children, snuggling, having just one special child, adopting the eldritch children of eldritch sex partners, being tortured by Elves, and embracing the gospel of Morgoth.

It should be exciting! I hope nobody minds when their cool plot and characters show up in my fic. Don’t feel offended if I didn’t propose to steal from you too; I don’t have my spreadsheet with me.

Every Friend Group Needs + Elves and Dwarves (and Halbrand)

made with @aadmelioraa

Part One

Me:Amazon, can we have Elon Musk?

Amazon: No,we have Elon Musk at home

Elon Musk at home:

Galadriel: There is a tempest in me!

Huan: Oof, me too. Ate silmarils. Shouldn't have. Might have diarrhea tonight.

Absolutely yes!!!!!!

Elves don't get long hair in ROP because it would make Bezos upset