#reblogging because i remembered i'm proud of this one lmao
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we have a very long post again so i can bet y'all know who this is about. that's right. pearl appreciation post
it's a little more vent-y than i wanted bc i do talk about what's wrong with me and the things going on with my weird messed up body so please be careful of that. if you want to skip all of that, there is a big bolded red label titled "appreciation part"
i talked about my sun allergy on pearl's stream today and she asked what happened to me in the sun. i've spoken a little on the things wrong with me [although i don't go into too much detail bc i don't want to burden or worry pearl/chat more than i already do] so she does know a thing or two about me
(transcription: um, thank you for the ten bitties, gasps! "i get really bad sunburns that blister with severe rashes." *pained* ooh. "can't be outside for more than five to ten minutes without severe pain. that's why i work nights and have a night schedule." oh my gosh. that must be super difficult, gasps. i'm sorry that you have to deal with that! wow. you- you've got like- the world is not kind to you, i feel like. um. there's- there's so many things that you go through and- my gosh. i hope- i hope- i hope you're doing okay. that's a lot to deal with, though. that is a lot to deal with)
[also, side note. every time pearl calls me gasps i half expect her to call me vyren aka my name even though it would startle me if she randomly did one day. i forget she most likely doesn't know it or how to pronounce it lmao. it's vie-ren, not veer-in]
there's a line from that that keeps replaying in my mind just over and over again
"the world is not kind to you, i feel like"
i just keep repeating it because it's true. the world is not kind to me and i've spoken a little about this. i'll never be healthy or okay and never even had the chance. i was destined the life i live
watching pearl's streams and videos and chatting in her discord server help me forget all of that. i can pretend i'm not sick, that my bones don't scrap together, that the fever is gone [hell, sometimes i can pretend it was never there]. for four hours three times a week, i can pretend
every time i have a health update, pearl always tells me she hopes i get better or at least get an improvement. i always appreciate these moments and hold them close bc despite the fact that i cannot get better, they mean a lot
i'm getting blood tests hopefully in three months to see if i have one disorder. the disorder is incurable and genetic unfortunately. if i do have the disorder [almost 100% likely], we'll see if the meds help with me being sick
[APPRECIATION PART]
pearl, if you end up seeing this, thank you so much for everything. thank you for reading every bits message people send, thank you for spreading positivity, thank you for having a true safe space, thank you for your get well wishes, thank you for being genuinely kind, thank you for just being a good person, thank you for caring, thank you for remembering, thank you for being you
it's hard to come by someone who's a good person, especially in the world we live in today. i'm so happy and proud to be apart of your community that you've created. everyone here is so kind and it's genuinely refreshing
i hope these appreciation posts help you and seeing everything people say in the reblogs, especially on my last one. i'm still getting a lot of notifications from that post
[sometimes i wonder if these posts are too much. if you have an issue with them, pearl, please tell me! i'll stop/tone it down in a heartbeat]
sorry for a long post but at this point y'all know that i have long lost the ability to shut up
#pearlescentmoon#appreciation post#maintagging bc i want her to see this but if she doesn't want to reply that's okay#i just needed to say this#i am once again asking for pearl positivity in the reblogs
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It's me again, I'm hesitant about reblogging because my first ask was spoilery but in the end, who cares lmao. FUCK I forgot about Sara. I agree that the ending was choppy, especially the hospital scene... he moved from ambulance to post-mortem way too fast. What always gets me though is Peter's breakdown. He's alone, and it hits this unemotional man with full force. It's magnificent. I'm also just... sad that Neal was made to believe that he could never fully change. He deserved better. He tried so hard and he WAS succeeding despite Mozzie's disappointed resistance plus everyone else's mistrust. Thanks for geeking out on this with me hehee
hi again!!!
ugh yes Peter's breakdown is heartwrenching, and it brings me back to a line he says earlier in the show, i don't remember the exact words, but he says something about how if something were to happen to Neal, he doesn't know if he'll be able to live with it. and i just. yeah. ow. lol
now buckle up for another character analysis essay bc i can't shut up ever lol
Honestly i have a lot of mixed feelings about Neal's "redemption/reformation" ! because yes he wants to be good, but also... i don't think a true/complete redemption arc is necessary for his character, and i honestly like that he doesn't have one? I think that the most important aspect of his character development in that sense is that, he considers the effects of his actions on other people a lot more by the end, and i think that's all the reformation that he needs and that makes sense for him. I don't think he needs to become someone who commits no crimes/cons in order for his reformation to be recognized.
i think what i'm more sad about is the lack of recognition for that development. he isn't perfect, and he still has a lot of vices, but now his actions are almost all out of a desire to fix things/protect people/etc. Most of the other characters, namely Peter, don't seem to recognize or appreciate this development. Understandable, to an extent – Peter has dedicated his life to law enforcement, and his moral code is, for the most part, aligned with the law. Neal is still breaking the law, even if, in his own mind, Neal is doing so with good intentions, to Peter, the outcome matters a lot more than the intent.
Neal begins the show as a con-artist and art thief whose priority is his own enjoyment and gain, and he ends the show still a con-artist and art thief, but now his priority is shifted. In the later seasons, almost none of the crimes he commits are simply for the hell of it. there's almost always a reason, and the reason is almost always to fix something or to protect the people he loves. his moral code is still very distorted, and he has a strong disregard for the law and authority, but he also cares about other people, their safety, happiness and their opinions of him. He still loves the thrill of the con, and he still loves living luxuriously, he's still impulsive, and he's still very proud of his skills, but...
these things don't make him "bad," in my opinion. He wants to be good, and he is good. His intentions are good, it's just that the way he understands and navigates the world isn't aligned with "legal good."
I could write an essay on that alone. Neal is very traumatized, and very good at compartmentalizing and masking so that no one can tell, and also (this is entering headcanon zone) probably some form of neurodivergence, on top of probable CPTSD and some kind of personality disorder. So, obviously his relationship with the world as a whole is... disrupted and warped by these things, so maybe that's one of the main issues. "moral and good" as Neal understands these things, simply don't perfectly align with most people's definitions of them.
And I think this is the main issue in his relationship with Peter. Neal wants to be good, and is trying to be, and he wants Peter's recognition and appreciation for that. But that's still not enough for Peter, who operates on a different moral code, and doesn't understand Neal's perspective.
Once again, this is very longwinded, but basically: I think Neal did have as much of a redemption arc as he could have had without having a complete shift in worldview, and I really like that about him and his character. That he didn't end the series as a perfectly reformed ex-con, but he did end the show as a good person.
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✨ content creator year in review ✨
a bit late but thank you kitty @babychicklix for the tag! <3
first creation / most recent creation
lee know x beauty + – jan 2022 and i remade this set later because looking back on it yikes sharpening? i dont know her
SKZ x TODAY Play || Bang Chan – technically not the last set i posted but it's the last one i made in chronological order
one of my favorite creations
this red lights set or this mistopher from skz talker ep 54
i feel very normal about both of them for. reasons. ha ha. hahah. :))
a creation you're really proud of
this lix at MAMA 2022! it was a nightmare to color and i'm really proud of how it turned out
a creation that took you forever
anything that comes out the studio choom like the CASE 143 set because 9 times out of 10 i'll have to make a bargain with the devil to find a psd that will work and won't make my boys look like reanimated corpses *cries in changing lights my detested*
the creation that received the most notes
this hyunjin set from the concerts in may which is ironically one of my least favorite ones
a creation that you think deserves more notes
soooo i needed a couple of reminders of this this year, but i'm not sure "deserve" is the right word cause it's not like anyone's paying me or forcing me to do this.
it's a hobby lol and if people like what i share and they share it on their blogs too then i'm happy and if they don't, as long as i remember i'm doing this for fun and because i enjoy it, then that's ok too!
i mean i'm only human and sometimes i get frustrated but only because i know how much time i spent on a set and i was pretty proud of the final result, that however doesn't mean anyone owes me a like or a reblog!
so to anyone that has ever left a note on any of my sets: thank you <3
a new fandom you joined and a creation you made for it
ahem due to circumstances beyond our control (the brainworms brainworming) i basically only listened to skz and svt this past year lmao
but now that i'm going down a monsta x / le sserafim rabbithole i might make something for them too
a creation you made that breaks you heart
.......the chanlix + bonus: group hug at the end of the seoul concert that has been languishing in my drafts since may i just. i can't. nopenopenope i cried like a baby that day i'm not reliving that sorry <;/3
a "simple" creation you really love
this hyunlix set i made for rena @juiceofmoons i had so much fun altering the colors!
a creation that was inspired by another one
my TOP5 skz songs was inspired by this amazing set by @ yang-innie
a favorite creation created by someone else
hmmmm too many to count sorry
favorite content creators for the year
alright here we go *cracks knuckles* in no particular order:
@agibbangs ; @jinniebit ; @snug-gyu ; @changbeens ; @njaems ; @hyunebear ; @babychicklix ; @strayz ; @strayklds ; @jisungs ; @missyedits ; @juiceofmoons ; @winterfloral ; @jerirose ; @jisungsjaistandjeekies ; @minchanz ; @khairemisthios ; @cheekyquokka ; @minzbins ; @chanstopher ; @bangzchan ; @yonglixx ; @geniaparadox ; @chrstphrbng ; @alrightyaphroditie
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I love the sweet and thoughtful responses I've gotten on my "the seven but with minor demigods" post and I'm gonna reblog it very soon with a couple people's additions that caught my eye, but I did also want to say (and I just woke up so lmao ignore me if this turns out weird), but TLO set up so many different avenues for what a future series would be like. In fact, just based on what I'm gonna say further, I'd like to argue that the whole PJO series was leading up to the point I'm gonna make.
Underworld vs Olympus.
I have a few original works that are kind of in this mindset of a Pantheon with two separate factions and one faction is belittled by the other because it's dark and people don't like it, whatever, whatever, but from the first book where for whatever reason because I can't quite remember why but they automatically assumed that somehow Hades got the lightning bolt and went there to steal it back, from the Titans curse where Bianca f****** died and Percy realized that Nico was a son of Hades as well as the fact that at some point in the book they realize that Nico and Bianca are not from this time. And then in the battle of the labyrinth where they find pan and pan excludes Niko when he's talking to him and you know the fact that at the end of the other book
(sorry I'm just I've been so tired and I just woke up so this is going to get weird and then I'm going to do some brief editing and send it out and you guys are going to get what you see and maybe I'll make sense later)
But anyway, basically you know remember Percy also said that he didn't want to tell anyone that Nico was a son of Hades because he knew that it would drop unnecessary attention and even then he still looked for him and the next book he still knows that it's better for Nico to go home to his dad and train in the Underworld than it is for him to stay at camp.
An in the book after that, he finds out Nico's whole sad past and why his brain got washed and you have Morpheus who is a child of the underworld who is on the Titan's side and in the Sword of Hades short story you have the exact same thing where Hades's daughter is on the Titan side, or at least she doesn't stop them from trying to escape with the sword, and I think there was also the thing with Hecate, and she's not necessarily a child of the underworld but she does live there.
We also have Ethan who is the son of Nemesis who is the daughter of Nyxx who guess again lives in the Underworld, specifically Tartarus (which is just the underworld's basement, but also used to be an area of punishment not just for Titans but also for really really bad people before the fields of punishment became a thing it used to be Elysium asphidos Tartarus and when you play the Hades game it shows you this exact same thing I don't remember when the fields of punishment came into a thing it might have just been another term for Tartarus? and Rick wrote around that for some reason, I don't really know, but you get my point).
In the Sword of Hades as well you have Persephone stating that outside of Kronos, they have other enemies to protect themselves against, and it's never actually stated what those enemies are or who those enemies are but just based on everything up until that point (plus, you know, my own personal headcanons about Hades relationship with his Olympian family), you kind of get the sense that it's the people living on that mountain that are causing some problems.
And then the end of The last Olympian is great Hades comes into the final battle his Wi-Fi side his sister by his side he's proud of Nico he gets the recognition he deserves from Zeus but it's very fleeting. And it's really weird because based on everything that we know about what has happened between Hades and Zeus whenever I remember that scene I always remember him being the one that pushes Zeus to say a compliment rather than Poseidon and when I rewrote that scene recently for My Underworld Jason fanfic it actually took me a little bit by surprise because I didn't remember it playing out that way.
It actually is kind of another show and tell about how Rick will take the most upsetting traumatizing thing to occur and then very quietly and neatly packaged it up into two sentences and then act like it never happened.
The way that scene should have gone was Zeus very quickly pushing past the fact that out of all the other gods, Hades was the one who is actually on the front lines helping their children fight against the enemy. Percy should have noticed, Hades should have been disgruntled but I think Persephone or the fact that Nico was in the room should have kept him from responding to the very quick blow off of his efforts but Percy should have noticed that there was a difference between the way Zeus treated his older brother versus the way he treated everyone else
Also Nico doesn't receive a gift even though everyone else does despite everything he had done up until that point (literally being the only reason Percy didn't die during the final battle because no one else suggested jumping into the Styx), and despite being the fact that he is the reason his father ended up helping them in the first place and I would have loved in Percy's quest to get them to acknowledge their kids and acknowledge the minor gods point that out. Something in his occasional seaweed brain "I spoke too much without thinking" fashion like "oh also Nico probably should have gotten something too and I think that just goes into blah blah whatever" like just using it as an example of kind of ticking off his uncle a bit more, but again showing the clear divide especially if Zeus sort of hand waves the thing and gives Nico like a sword or something and it's just sort of like a pity gift.
Also be really funny if in that scene where he's pointing out how Nico was overlooked as a side eye to how his father was overlooked if he also kind of alluded to the fact that he knows that it was Zeus's fault that Maria died and Nico and Bianca ended up in the Lotus casino and that it was technically Zeus's fault that the Oracle was cursed by Hades in the first place (because if he didn't try to kill Hades' kids, Hades wouldn't have been so angry about the prophecy).
And then that unspoken tension would have been a really nice way to segue into a sequel series.
Anyway okay I'm still really tired but I have to get ready for work so I'm just going to, like ,make sure these paragraphs are broken up properly and that there are punctuation marks so that it's not just a rambling blah blah blah and I will maybe write a better version of this after work. Or during lunch, idk.
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Hello ebhhabbah- I will be keeping up with the joneses and following your new blog hehe~ I can't believe that's one of your first smuts !?!? it's sososo good- you might not be proud of it but I am- it was such a fun read!!! I love sending fics to my friends and receiving them back is just as fun! I'm so glad you do too! Being a huihui is literally so fun hebbhahba- He's the perfect mixture of fun and relaxing and it's so perfect for that au ehbhabahb- Omg if you ever follow through pls lmk- I would love it sm!! It's no problem- It was so good I had to tell you my thoughts and reblog it to save it so I could easily go back and read it ebhhbahba- It's so insane that you conceptualized two of my favorite things (it really makes sense now why i ult him after loving shaggy when i was a kid ebhhba)- Thank you so much- it is the perfect match- thank you for writing it- it was just so perfect behbah- Nah- I don't think you were projecting (maybe it's because I love cats a lot too) I absolutely think he would have cat supplies ebhhbahba- He loves cats sm- (maybe it's time to get that cat pipe hehe~) This is just who stoner!jun is tho ebhhba- Again thank you so much for writing that fic- it may be off of of your older blog but it certainly felt so new and lovely to read- thank you!! 🥺💖
asfdjsh thank you so much!! it was in fact the second smut fic i ever wrote (the first was a vampire one for halloween— let's just say i've improved a lot since that one lmao). honestly i was just trying to come up with a halloween idea that hadn't been done a million times before and i was like omg wait. scooby doo !
i remember seeing your url before so i'm pretty sure you're on my taglist, but if you aren't i'll be sure to tag you in any more stoner!jun things i post!! i have a stoner!chan fic on my masterlist already but eventually i hope to have one for each of the members, just for fun :) i have SO many ideas for stoner!vernon and i have a stoner!cheol wip somewhere so there will definitely be plenty more where that came from for sure!
#[💌] — asks#[🎙️] — feedback#blizzardfluffykpop#tysm for the feedback <33 im kicking my feet and giggling rn#the shaggy enjoyer to jun bias pipeline needs to be studied tbh i had the BIGGEST crush on matthew lillard when i was like 7
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hello my dear i am so late but i have just seen you reblogged this andddd if you'd still like to: 💛 🔐🍌🌝 and if u want~ ⭐️ boop
(yes, there's a yellow theme <33 to match ur blog~)
Hellooo!! Don't worry better late than never haha (and also that gives me an opportunity to fill the 💛 asked by that poor anon whom I had completely forgotten, I'm so sorry buddy I promise I was just very busy 😭)
How cute and thoughtful ✨
- 💛 what is your favorite feature on yourself?
Not to sound like a narcissist, but I love a lot of stuff about myself xD (on good days at least lmao) I'd say my favorite is my hands, everyone compliments them at some point or another haha. They're very long and slender and even though I got shit for them (during the anon hate period for those who remember, they said they looked like a skeleton's hand xD) I still love them a lot~ it's just a struggle to find rings lmao
- 🔐 something no one would guess about you
That I'm bald !! Well maybe a few people know because of that picrew I posted a while ago but yeah I have no hair left lmao xD well I'm not completely hairless, I just probably have 1 cm left of hair (0,3 inches for our american friends~) I think it's absolutely not something people expect, especially when I'm wearing a cap or a beanie but I've been rocking that haircut for a year now almost and I still love it so much xD (this is the sign you're looking for if you wanna shave your head 😉)
- 🍌 what is one talent you wish you had
Play the piano ! Or any instrument honestly haha. I used to play the flute but I forgot how to and now I wish I could go back in time. I miss playing music. One day I'll definitely get back to it !!!
- 🌝 a show you would recommend to anyone
Oh god I have no idea cause I watch so much scary or weird stuff, most of the things I think about have trigger warning lists as long as my arm 💀 Perhaps a tamer one would be Love, Death and Robots ? It's a great show, lots of amazing episodes and while some episodes are a bit forgettable, some of them are mindblowing. Definitely worth a watch !
mention of eating disorder and mental health
- ⭐️ what is one of your biggest accomplishments? Why is it so important to you?
Definitely overcoming my eating disorders. I struggled for a long time and after 8 years I'm finally free from this hell. It took a lot of work, dedication and sacrifices and I'm proud of myself for surviving and thriving today. It's important because someone close to me couldn't recover from it, to this day they're still suffering in the throes of an0rex1a like I used to be. We still call each other regularly and seeing me recover and have the life they could never have has made them feel a lot better. They will most likely never get better but at least they didn't see me fall victim to this horrible disease too. My recovery is bringing them the happiness they deserve. It's important for me and for them and in the end that's why this is my biggest accomplishment as it goes beyond my sole experience. I hope to one day share my story and help those beyond my circle of friends and family
Thank you so much Waterfall for all those asks 💖
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Hiii, I always wanted to ask how you got into video editing
i mean i've always loved movies, since i was little and i think i was always a bit more interested in what was going on behind the camera rather than in front of it. i do hope i can one day be a proper film editor. what got me into trying my own hand at this amateur mix and matching was actually lana del rey lmao. i remember back in 2011 seeing the music video for video games and blue jeans for the first time and being so struck by how DIY she was at the time. i've never seen someone make that kind of music video, she just found these clips, "glued" them together and put some music over it. it was so simple and charming. then i saw other people make these types of videos clearly inspired by hers, like idk how famous mermaid motel youtube channel is amongst people on here but she's kind of an icon. someone left a comment on my youtube channel once saying "this channel is to me what mermaid motel is to the coquette community" and it made me laugh, but it's also definitely an honor lmao. anyways i thought you know what i really want to make these as well so i started collecting clips i could find on youtube of old movies, commercials, home videos, super 8 films etc. like people would upload footage of 60s las vegas or sunset strip so i used things like that, cutting and pasting, and i put lana's music over it, especially her unreleased stuff. i'm still proud of some of the ones i made. i wish i could find them but i guess they got lost over the years. i think i did upload one or two on here, if i manage to find them i'll reblog. and then after a while i got out of it just because i used to make them on windows movie maker and that software is a fucking nightmare. and then like 3 years ago i think i got a new laptop and thought ykw let's try again. i remember i watched blade for the first time and let me tell you that movie is a cinematic adrenaline rush and i was itching to make a vampire edit so i did and i've been making these edits ever since. this site introduced me to the concept of fancams so i'm having fun with that too. i hope improvement can be seen. also thank you so much for this question, i love talking as you can see. <3333
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claps hands together. hi hope you've been well, sorry i haven't asked much. buuuut. I forgot you wrote a thing until lately. :}
War On Love. How would it have continued/ended, what plot beats where there supposed to be if you remember any, etc?
also this'll sound weird, mainly because I can't really explain it and I'm still working thru it, but I wanted to say thanks for writing it? Finding it again and reading through it reminded me of things I had forgotten about myself for a while. Which has really helped from then to now. So, yeah, as silly as it sounds, thank you. :}
Lmao you're never obligated to interact with me homie, dw. Feel free to send me whatever when you're vibing, but don't also feel pressured to engage. You're too kind.
Long answer under the cut
I go back and forth on whether I'll ever update WoL. It just has so many bad connotations and memories for me about the headspace I was in while writing it, and where I was at emotionally, etc. On the other hand, I'm also incredibly proud of some of the insights I wrote about Gaz's perspective, and the overall plot twists and where it was going. I also still have a TON of writing for it still in bits and pieces, both important chunks and unimportant, AND like 4 chapters of the sequel written.
Sometimes I'm like, well, I could sort of finish it in the same style that like That Thing on Your Wrist and What We Become, which are more written in sort of continuous blurbs with gentle transitions and takes occasions to focus on really important scenes. I think with what I have written, it'd be feasible, but that'd also mean taking time away from my more important projects like Dead Weight and Re:MHNY2, so I hesitate to really commit to anything. You are not the first person to ask though, so that may be something I end up doing in the long term. A quick add up of the chunks of the story I have written says I have roughly 53k words of unpublished story for WoL. On the one hand, a shame to go to waste, on the other hand, I'm not really sure how I'd feel emotionally about trying to dig it back. Like I said, I go back and forth. Just for bonus trivia, since I gave the unpublished word count for WoL, it's sequel, which had a pending title of War on Finality, has 25k words written, and about a 2k words worth of ideas that I wrote, but wasn't sold on including.
I super appreciate btw your note about "things I had forgotten about myself for awhile." That really resonated with me. WoL has is a bittersweet for me because while it was my attempt to push through the gross stuff happening during that time period that I hadn't processed yet, I'm still also really proud of the messages I was going to include, some of the plot points I'd come up with, plot parallels, the OC's character development and direction, and how incredibly different it was going to be from anything I'd written at that point. I think it'd probably have ended up being one of my most emotive fics, and definitely with the (initial) darkest ending.
That being said, the plot of WoL definitely is it's own whole ass post, so apologies for not being able to answer immediately, but I genuinely think I'd break the character limit of tumblr if I tried to go into it all here lmao. Also, since it comes up sometimes from other dm's I've gotten, I think the better idea for me to do is make a masterpost about WoL and where it was going, include some screenshot blurbs for context, etc. That might take a few days, but when that posts, I'll reblog this with the link to the masterpost.
#amyisherenowansweringyou#war on love#ravenfollower13#WoL#to be continued#tldr for skimmers is I'm gonna make a masterpost for War on Love for people who were just curious to see how it was gonna end#will reblog this when it's up#zim#fanfiction#invader zim#gaz#zagr#iz
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Was tagged by two of my favorite blogs on tumblr to do this. Thank you my beloveds @comraderoscoes and @sirlewishamiltons
name: Hera
sign: I am a Taurus with a Leo Rising bc @takemetoasummereve taught me this and i wanna do her proud 😭
time: 2:06 PM
favorite band/artist: It changes all the time. In fact, i dont have any favorite artist or band because i just enjoy the music. (I WILL DIE FOR XNDA THO)
last movie: OMG I just watched one like a few days ago??? Nope. Can't remember 😭
last show: again, don't remember. I finished GOT a few months ago. And then rewatched Normal People. Good Omens 2 when it came out. Oh wait, i was in the mood for cringe last week so i binged this reality show called Secrets & Sisterhoods and it was fucking awful 😭😭😭😭 (tbf i wanted cringe and i got it)
when I created this blog: 2013? 2014? idk
what I post: LEWIS LEWIS LEWIS (sometimes his husbands like Seb, Bono, Val) and some Mercedes.
other blogs: @f1incorrectquotess and @excerptsfromthepast (just for reblogging etc)
do I get asks: very rarely. tho i would love more so SPAM ME PLEASE 😭😭
followers: 420 (tho i dont understand how the incorrect quotes is already over 500 and i started it a few months ago 😭😭😭😭)
average hours of sleep: 2 to 4 hours
instruments: if only i was talented
what I'm wearing: a long shirt/frock with black tights
dream job: marketing/PR/Communications (in f1, that would be life made for me)
dream trip: the entire world?!!! i really want to travel
favorite song atm: i can't think of a single song. It's like i have never heard a song in my life lmao 😭
tagging @vro0m @l8tof1 @luchitohamilton @lhpics7 and anyone else who would love to do this. No pressure ofc <3
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ty for the tag @cantsaythetword <3
fandom faves of the year !!
favourite new fandom: i guess bsd considering i've been hyperfixated since april LMAO but mp100 is also a vv good one!!
favourite new ships: skk, satosugu, and akiangel
favourite anime/tv show: chainsaw man !!
favourite movie: the only good ones i watched didn't come out this year so. none
favourite character: do Not make me choose i'll cry
favourite soundtrack: the csm soundtrack goes So hard
favourite book/manga/comic: TGCF OMG i havent even finished it (if anyone knows where i can read the whole thing translated i'll love you) but its so good
favourite game: i dont think i played any that came out this year!! been wanting to play legends arceus though
highlight of the year: i am forgetting literally Everything that happened this year. reigen sans queen of england was definitely a fun one though
community faves !!
favourite tumblr moment: goncharov was certainly a time
favourite fanart: this, this, this, this, and this are some :)
favourite fic: oh this one is. very hard .... but some that i find myself revisiting often are
-if we're being honest by thequeenofwhump
-now and forever (and before then, too) by radstarmuffin
-difficult patient by stargazingly
-birthday tickles for the child(e) by anonymous
favourite ask game: gonna be honest i remember absolutely zero of the ones i reblogged
top achievement as a creator: i hit 500 followers !! which is so cool ily guys
best fic of mine: in terms of impressions, on ao3 it was looking out for you and here it was kiss me hard before you go, which is wild because i wrote it last week, but if we're talking fic that im most proud of, im a fan of my akiangel drabble here
most underappreciated fic of mine: dandelion didn't do very well on ao3 </3
post that got more popularity than expected: that akiangel fic. what the hell
something on my blog i changed: my layout. numerous times.
next year !!
something i didn't do this year but would like to next year: commissions!! i plan on opening them soon :D
goals for next year: i feel like i didn't write much this year until these past few months, so writing more!!
2023 releases i'm looking forward to: botw2 definitely!! as well as the new seasons for bsd, jjk, tgcf, and sxf :)
spreading love !!
shoutout to people who made my year better: of course all of my friends and partners!! i love you all sm <3 and shoutout to those mutuals i don't regularly talk to but we're still chilling together
(too nervous to tag anyone so just go for it lmao)
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So sending this anonymously, because I have really bad anxiety over Being Perceived, but I love your blog and your takes on the inner thoughts/workings of the boys in Moon Knight. I’m really looking forward to your upcoming works. I think you have a real dedicated talent to pulling these descriptions and putting them into your writing. I know it’s discouraging to not get active notes like reblogs on pieces, but I want you to know that I’m always so anxious to see what you put out next, and maybe one day I’ll be confident enough to do so directly. I hope you have an amazing week!
Anon 🥹, this is so sweet of you!!! I hope i have the chance to know who you are so that I can properly thank you and shower you with love and support. This is going to be a long read so brace yourself omfg:
To be honest, I struggle on forming the perfect words to describe everything that i'm imagining for a fic and somehow after writing a paragraph, i still feel that the words that i've put and written is still not enough.
I really wish that I had other writer's grammar, vocabulary, writing style, and their ability to construct sentences and parallels so that the readers will clearly perceive what the character feels and think at the moment. But also I am truly amazed with the other fic writers and the way their mind and imagination works on writing these plots. I really want to write everything that my mind comes up with, but i have this feeling of being limited that kinda hinders me from continuing. I have this harry potter fanfiction in wattpad and it's been a year since the last time i updated. I just came back to writing when this was submitted in my inbox.
I also want to share my struggle in a specific area which is smut, hence this post.
When I first write this moonknight x reader fic, there's a little bit of uncertainty that was shown in my writing of the kissing scenes. truth to be told I was kinda *cough* uncomfortable in writing the kissing scene for some reason (hint is on my pfp 🥹) despite reading thousands (millions) of smut. I was challenging myself to write a kissing scene on that fanfic and I knew to myself that if I didn't try to write it, I wouldn't grow as a fic writer. And i was so proud when i posted a fanfic with a kissing scene and also a r+18 headcanon 😂.
And yes you're right anon, it kinda feels a little bit discouraging when no attention was garnered in your work, and I remember the first time that i published my fic here and after hours of waiting, no one interacted with it and i ended up deleting it lmao 😂. I laugh every time i remember that. Now, every time a fanfic appears in my feed, i'll bookmark it, read the whole thing and comment/like/rb it as a support to the writer.
I relate to you so much and i know how it feels, i hope that you are okay wherever you are. It took me so long to answer, but thank you for dropping by on my inbox anon. Sorry for ranting!! I feel soft and wholesome whenever this kind of message is in my inbox, and that someone really appreciates and read the stuff that I wrote. 🫶🏼 Have a nice week to anon! Thank you once again for the appreciation!
All the love!
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I posted 14,399 times in 2022
3,390 posts created (24%)
11,009 posts reblogged (76%)
Blogs I reblogged the most:
@adampage
@roofgeese
@beardedbarba
@smallmansection
@axelwolf8109
I tagged 6,188 of my posts in 2022
#my inbox has been filled - 728 posts
#rezz liveblogs aew - 500 posts
#rezz liveblogs raw - 474 posts
#rezz liveblogs sd live - 400 posts
#rezz liveblogs nxt - 257 posts
#anonymous - 169 posts
#rezz liveblogs aew rampage - 161 posts
#'the thirst is real' tag - 102 posts
#what a beautiful white man - 93 posts
#axelwolf8109 - 61 posts
Longest Tag: 138 characters
#i literally said from the jump that he's nothing more than a shit-talking shit stirrer who's lost his touch and everyone clowned me for it
My Top Posts in 2022:
#5
so i finally got my final grades/GPAs for the semester and I'm so proud of myself 😭👏🏾
For the semester, it's a 3.79 and my cumulative GPA is a 3.64. I can finally breathe 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
44 notes - Posted May 11, 2022
#4
I forgot to take pictures yesterday so here are some pics of my new hair that I took just now lmao enjoy 💙✨
56 notes - Posted March 1, 2022
#3
not only was I one of the first people in line for the Oscar Isaac panel, bUT I GOT TO ASK HIM A QUESTION
HE CALLED ME DARLING
HE LAUGHED AT MY LITTLE JOKE
HIS LAUGH IS JUST LOVELY AND SO IS HIS SMILE
HES PRETTIER IN PERSON YALL TRUST ME
HE LAUGHED SO MUCH AT MY ACT IT WAS GLORIOUS
I’m legit shaking crying screaming etc etc
(I asked him if he’s ever “liberated” anything from any of the sets/studios/stages he’s worked on and what those things were and where they were now, and he said that he would steal little props from all the shows he’s worked on and keep them in his basement and closet on shelves as mementos)
He also called Pedro his slut of a husband and that he would never leave him (someone asked about their relationship/bromance) and honestly that’s just a W in general.
Overall: I have officially won at life and literally nothing can/will top this moment 😌
58 notes - Posted October 9, 2022
#2
she's pinky, she's pinky w/ a brain 💕💕💕
71 notes - Posted May 13, 2022
My #1 post of 2022
Heart Strings
Pairing: Damian Priest x female!Reader
Word Count: 7,073 (talk about a comeback lmao)
so @kalliravenne challenged me to write an incubus!D. Priest fic with hints of darkness and dream fuckery....and i think/hope i achieved that.....
this is also the first thing that i've written in the past year and a half so it's bound to be a bit more than rusty but regardless, i hope you enjoy it!!! much love <3
(also this was supposed to be short but managed to be long as shit with hella filler. so read as you will lmao XD)
For as long as you could remember, the club you worked at was always packed, booked, and busy on Halloween nights. How could it not be? A decent enough drink at a less-than-decent establishment with a pretty bad good chance of going home with someone you’ll forget in the next twenty-four hours? What could be better this time of year?
The line already started to curve around the block, with girlfriends dragging along their boyfriends, girl friends having a fun night out with their girl friends, and lonely twenty-somethings just wanting to get their rocks off. You rolled your eyes at the sight as you slipped through the “employee’s only” entrance and dropped your bag inside your locker in the backroom lounge.
The place was damp, the neon lights were shitty, the bar was sticky with gum and drinks you couldn’t quite scrub out, and the walls were covered in graffiti and scrawled-on phone numbers and who knows what else…but you couldn’t help but smile as you filed in behind your coworkers because it was home, your home for the past few years.
“Hey!” one of your coworkers yelled from across the room, calling your name and rushing towards you in a cloud of gold and glitter. “Where’s your costume? Kevin wanted all of us to get into the holiday spirit tonight.”
You dropped your bag into your locker before reaching inside and pulling out a plastic bag. As much as you loved your boss for tolerating you all these years and keeping you hired, he always had a flare for dramatics that was incredibly extra. He had texted every one of your coworkers that you were required to dress up for tonight’s holiday festivities and then proceeded to - at least, to your knowledge - doused the insides of the club with so many cheap Halloween decorations that you’re sure he ran the local party store fresh out of their stock for the next year.
“I know, Cynthia,” you told her, pulling out a small wire halo and angel wings covered in white and silver feathers. “Can’t you tell what I’m gonna be?” You plastered on a smile and gestured down to your all-white party dress and heels.
“You never wear all white, though…” She gasped. “Are you an angel?”
“Exactly, and you are…?”
“Cleopatra, silly!” she smiled, giving you a twirl, the glitter adorning her bodice and skin spreading everywhere. “I’m gonna be by the door handing out flyers and stuff for the dance competition later, so I gotta look cute and eye-catching somehow.”
Cynth gave you a wink before rushing back off to finish her makeup, her beaded headpiece clacking away and making you smile softly before you slipped on your own accessories over your “costume”. The heels you wore were just for show, after all, just for showing Kevin that you actually tried to put some effort in for tonight.
“Fucking hell,” you muttered, forcing a smile onto your face as you stumbled your way past your coworkers and through the back of the club, finally pulling back the curtain that lead into the main dancefloor.
The swirling neon spotlights damn near blinded you when you emerged, the DJ already setting up hisetlist for the night as mini pumpkin, ghost and other Halloween confettis absolutely littered the floor. There was orange and black confetti coming down from the ceiling, giant bat stickers on the walls, orange and green glowsticks linen the floors….there were even Halloween themed condoms in a cup by the bathrooms in case there were any rowdy couples who can’t keep it in their pants.
Kev really went all out this year, huh, but guess who has to clean all of this up later tonight, you thought to yourself, silently cursing your boss before taking your place behind the bar and pulling out the foam slides you always hid below the glasses, immediately slipping off your heels and sliding them on with a sigh of relief.
You always leave your space tidy and well-kept despite how crappy it may look at first glance; you always kept your glasses cleaned, your multiple bar towels ready for the multiple accidents that always seem to happen on the other side, your tumblers are always together and you always restock your various liquors weekly. It’s your home away from home, your place to control and dictate.
You were cleaning off some glasses nearby with one of your bar towels, trying to shoulder one side of your angel wings back onto place when the music really started to kick up, the bass hitting you all the way in the back just as the front doors opened and the flood of people started filling the space.
In a matter of minutes, both the main dancefloor and the smaller second floor were full of eager partygoers looking for a good time, the air around the bar already feeling hot and stuffy from the bodies packed against each other.
Speaking of, the bar was packed with people looking forward to their first drink out of many of the night, each person and group shouting off what drinks, cocktails and mocktails they wanted off the Halloween menu Kev had you create and memorize the week prior.
But you’ve always loved a challenge, and tonight proved no different.
You never knew what kind of people you were going to get as you threw your bar towel over your shoulder and began taking orders, jotting them down with the person’s description on the small notepad you kept in the side cabinet. Some nights it was mainly loners, drifters who couldn’t quite find their crowd, sometimes it was scared twenty-one year-olds getting dragged along with their older friends as they threw literally every high-alcohol content drink that you had down their throats, and other times it was creeps who couldn’t quite keep their eyes in their heads and their hands to themselves.
But something deep within your mind told you otherwise; it told you that tonight would be…different. Something told you that tonight would finally make you feel something.
Yeah, right, you scoffed, reaching for your glasses and getting ready for the long night ahead. Like that’ll ever happen.
See the full post
171 notes - Posted June 29, 2022
Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →
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4 and 30 for the artist ask game :)
thank you!!
> 4. fav character/subject that's a bitch to draw
i struggle considerably with a number of things/characters when drawing them because overall i don't have much experience yet, but...the one that's a bitch to draw has to be MOOMINTROLL. I SWEAR TO GOD HE SHOULDN'T BE AS HARD TO DRAW AS HE IS FOR ME. also here's john's hand lmao??, i totally forgot i put it there and i like that idea
> 30. what piece of yours do you think is underrated
hmm.
not much stuff on my current account here, therefore no underrated works as of yet (my most recent johnkat piece that i'm pretty proud of hasn't gotten many notes iirc but it reached certain people whose appreciation of it is more than enough for me!).
however, i can share a thing from 2019 that didn't get much attention on the platform that i posted it on, yet i remember being particularly proud of it back in the day.
(please don't reblog/repost this though! not sure who might want to, but you know, just in case. i'll turn off the function when i get to my puter.)
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Ok be prepared for this be very emotional and me being a complete mush of a person... 😆💞 ( I think my cycle is coming up... Being extra emotional the last few days... 🤔😒 )
So... I saw your post about today being not so good.. As you probably know because I liked it, lol.. 💞
I know that we don't talk much besides reblogs and me coming in here to be a dork.. But I care about ya like you're family. 💞 just from how we've bonded from only reblogs and goofing around, I consider ya family and cherish you endlessly. 😘
For real wish there was a way to send over physical hugs through the internet.. Cause ya know I'd be sending as many as possible to you and anyone that I care about on here, lol. 💞 (definitely can't tell I'm a big hugger right?? 🤔😆)
Anyways this is me as best as possible sending one to you. 💞😙
I am very very sorry today wasn't a good day. I hope tomorrow will be better for you and everyday after. Just always remember to take care of yourself, even if it's something small to help ya feel better.. As long as you're taking care of yourself. 😘 And of course always remember to at least stay hydrated and at least have some snackies throughout the day.. 💞
I love ya x infinity. 😙 You got thissss! I'm so proud of you for pushing through each day. 💞😘
i love you, lotus!!!! thank you thank you!! i view you just the same, and my messages are always open if you ever want to chat!
this time it’s problems at home, so at least it’s not anything to do with this website anymore lmao gonna take some time to get over all this but i so so dearly appreciate you being here and being so kind to me.
you’re a sweetheart angel and never let yourself forget it! 💕
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I absolutely love and adore Harry, but the man's portfolio at the time literally must have been like - got jungle worms in iCarly and ate bread in Dunkirk.
First, you think that this man is entitled to rejecting a role beside a Oscar-nominated, pretty highly sought after actress, just because it is a "female-centric" film and he is famous, then you go on to talk about his generosity as if he did a huge favour on you, and then you call yourself a "feminist" and an "advocate for equal pay". Right!! We are delusional!! How tf does this woman have actual people admiring her? But again I guess even Donald Trump had supporters, why not her, right?
I so wish could go back to a pre-jan 2021 time, where I didn't even know a person of this name existed.
P.S. - I don't generally comment on people's appearance, but I think this woman has a scary face. Like I genuinely get scared by the pictures that are supposed to be "hot" or "model-like". I've never actually seen any acting jobs of hers other than pap walks and concerts (where she is pretty shit really), is her previous work any good?
you lost me when you compared her to donald trump lol
i think people defending her don't really know her or don't care about her enough to go looking for the source of so much hate (they think it's because she is dating harry styles and we think we have a chance of actually sleeping with him one day which lol) like, i've always been aware of who she was, i'm not gonna lie, i remember being obsessed with her character in the o.c back in 2005, i've seen a lot of her movies, including the one she directed (all this before don't worry darling was even a thing) and i thought she was actually cool lol like emily blunt kind of cool, or maybe anne hathaway kind of cool (people i don't know much about but i enjoy their films) and i always thought she was beautiful and she seemed to be a decent person - little did i know huh - i actually had to go back on my tumblr and delete posts that i had about her here LOL i have this tumblr since 2010 and i used to reblog her a lot (not proud to admit it) but then again, i didn't know anything about her. she is not the type of famous person that has a huge following behind her trying to learn everything about what she does and where she goes, so it was easy to just see her as this cool actress, so i get why people still like her. but she really just became relevant when she started "dating" harry, and well, since she is around him everytime, we got to learn A LOT about her and well.... here we are. anyway just to clarify, i absolutely despise her now, and i think the movies she's been are actually... not good (unlike the actress i mentioned above) lmao and i can't wait for this stunt to be over - every day is a day closer to the end, amen.
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🌌🎶💖
i don't know what one you're communicating with that first emoji, is it the sparkles? can u confirm for me and i'll reblog w that answer
🎶 Do you listen to music while you write? What song have you been playing on loop lately?
YES i have playlists for every season of fatt i've listened to (hieron / counterweight + aria joie megamix / twilight mirage / sangfielle), one for the original piece i'm working on, and a few other generic ones such as teen movie playlist, road trip playlist, girlmurder, songs about being in love, 2 playlists about the end of the world, etc etc. not going to share the generic ones but i WILL link the f@tt and original work playlists lmao the first because i'm proud of them and the second because that's what i've been listening to lately. most of the other ones are public on my spotify so you can go hunting for them if you so choose
💖 What made you start writing?
honestly i don't even remember. it's been so long, i've been doing it since the sixth or seventh grade. i think, around that time, i had a friend who had decided he was going to write a fantasy series (matthew r, if you're out there...) and i saw it and was like, ok but what if i did that too? that would be my guess? and then it very quickly developed into my entire personality.
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