#okay got that off my chest
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what kills me about this depp-heard nightmare situation, besides the obvious and that i haven't been able to avoid being made to think about it, is that like a year and a half ago when people were first demanding i pay attention to this scandal and depp's counterclaims i poked into it a little and was like,
'oh augh, yeah okay some of heard's statements feel pretty DARVO, this could be a situation where they were both super awful and she's kinda running a con on the survivor support community a la munchausen's, that's kinda gross :[ unfortunate that these things are so messy and ugly'
and moved on because i did not need to exhaustively examine this thing that had no relevance to my life and was none of my business and that i had no way of accessing Truth about
but then once depp launched this unwontedly televised defamation suit and started running it as a huge agonizing smear campaign with chilling implications for abuse victims everywhere, everything heard ever said against him became 500% more plausible, because that is the action of a vengeful, vicious, deeply selfish person.
that is a flagrant abuse of the legal system. that is not something a decent or reasonable person does, regardless of provocation.
and yet.
#depp vs heard#celebrity drama becoming real problems for others#hate that#abuse#hoc est meum#trying out the unrebloggablity function#to avoid the slight but real risk of this post going into orbit and murdering me#okay got that off my chest#now to filter this entire thing out of my tumblr experience
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wait you don't like novel xy? why not? 🤔
I should probably say I don't like the parts of him I've actually read or seen excerpts of.
I simply don't jibe with him.Much as I love me my villains, I don't wholeheartedly embrace all shapes and forms and draw the line at certain crimes and threats for personal reasons. Also, I actually usually get really into villains who are more along the lines of Loki, Magneto (#Magnetowasright), Erik (Phantom), Count Fosco (The Woman in White--one of my all-time favorite characters)--and from what I've seen of novel!XY, he's even further from my usual type than the cql version.
In short, there was some "that's too much for me" and there was no emotional clicking to compensate. I might like him better if I read the I-assume-better-translated version of him in the official novels. I very much rely on writing style and realistic dialogue when it comes to books, which is why I find it hard to connect to anyone in poor translations, no matter how good the original work. I recently gave up on The Man in the Iron Mask halfway through to wait for a different translation to come into the library as the one I was reading (from a major classics publisher!) was so poor as to be distracting. (Still bitter about how that one got published.)
I'm sure people have great reasons for liking novel!XY and am glad he made enough of an impression on readers for him to get the screen time he did in cql!
#Loki has also said some things I've had to rationalize away#you can probably see where I'm going with all this#side note please read The Woman in White I beg of you#I am restraining myself from complaining about Dumas#and giving my thoughts on the Three Musketeers#they should all be in jail!!!!#okay the restraining didn't work#great book though highly recommend it#just the Three Musketeers are degenerate criminals#Milady I would appreciate you#good news is that The Count of Monte Cristo is way better than The Man in the Iron Mask so far#of course the count lost my sympathy already#though it seems like Dumas somewhat expects that based off him calling his treatment of his servant “cruel”#on the other hand it seems like Dumas wants us to cheer him on while he helps bandits escape#I don't think Dumas gave it the same thought I did tbh given his writing habits#I just want to sit down with Dumas and ask him what the heck was the point of that horrifying pages-long digression#into the backstory of the bandit king Luigi supplants???#seriously#also why the hashish scene what was the point?#okay got that off my chest#ask tag
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Look wake is not winning any mother of the year awards but you also have to consider, Gideon was her unwanted pregnancy she went through with to keep john from continuing to colonize her people. it's clear that wake had family she DID love and chose to prioritize their future. But years later, after watching gideon sacrifice everything for the empire wake spent her whole life fighting, with no indication Gideon will ever switch sides, wake chooses not to destroy her. Apparently for no other reason than that she's her child. meanwhile john sticks his traumatized recently dead 19 year old on the front lines of a war! now WHO do y'all think should win this custody battle
#wake is not heartless she's just got priorities#yes she did say fuck that kid. but she also saved her twice#tbh none of these people should be parents not even pyrrha#okay NOW i think i may have gotten all my tlt thoughts from this week off my chest#they were pent up in there
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THAT WOUND. THAT VILE WOUND. it throbs in time with your speeding heart, and the ache it carries through your veins is oppressive, its hot, it tangles around your jaw and through your spine and behind your eyes. there are needles, sprouting from the lacerations like the most heinous ivy, and it strangles your lungs, rips tears from your eyes, lures bile to your throat. it hurts. oh god it hurts. you cant think, you cant breathe, you cant swallow, you cant see. you cant see. you cant see.
you cannot see but you know when your eyes are closed, because there are colors stained upon the backs of your eyelids. they form images of loved ones, of viscera, of bile and blood and blackened mud. its jarring, they make anxiety spike outwards, frantic ferro fluid, frightened from faces too scared, too pained, too dead, too piercing with eyes staring straight at you, straight at you.
actually, you cant tell when your eyes are open.
SAUCE FREE VERSION UNDER THE CUT.
#jrwi fanart#jrwi riptide#jrwi riptide spoilers#cw blood#gillion tidestrider#cw injury#wadda hell else i tag this as huh#OHH I HAVCE A STORY FOR THIS ONE. IM ACTUALLY POSTING SMTH AS SOON AS I FINISH IT THIS TIME#I STARTED THIS LIKEEE I THINK A TWO WEEKS OR SO AGO. IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A SCRIBBLE SKETCH similar to that one i made o chip#BUT THEN WELL. I GOT ILL AND MY WRIST STOPPED WORKING N MY PEN PRESSURE STOPPED BEING REAL#SO FOR A MISERABLE WEEK I WAS JUST PLACING PIXELS WITH MOUSE OR NONDOMMY HAND. SLOWLY BUT SURELY#THE PAIN I DEPICT HERE IS REAL. AND ALSO BASED OFF MY EXPERIENCE WITH AGONIZING TOOTH PAIN. I LOVE DESCRIBING PAIN#ALSO so i have limits with how Gross i draw gore. like i cant stand puss or anythign too gnarly like eeeeww i dont like it too yucky#EVEN SO. THIS WOUND? FESTERING? BLISTERING? HOOOWWW FUN EHEHE i wanted to make this wound look PAINFUL and AWFUL and GROSS but not TOO GROS#OH TURN UR BRIGHTNESS UP FOR THIS ONE BTW#THERE ARE THINGS HIDDEN IN THE DARK AND ALSO THE COLORS LOOK LIKE SHIT ON MY DARKER MONITER#im also rly proud o the colors... pink blood on chest vs blue blood on face. the STICKYNESS. BEHOLD MY VISCOSITY. the splatter. the pain.#OKAY OKAy i think im done ramblin for now#if u read all this thankuuuu i loove yooouu
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Thinking abt how they’re all looking at a different person LMAO
Will -> El
El -> Mike
Mike -> Will
————————————————————————
Will’s uncomfortable, feels left out, and notices El acting different around Mike.
El’s laughing and trying to be like a couple again to Mike, but also lying to him a lot of the day.
Mike is joking around and wants to include Will, but won’t do it directly. He’s also making sure Will is having fun, but trying to please El by acting coupley at the rink.
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How else would Will know that El is faking her emotions and lying to Mike constantly if he wasn’t focusing on El?
Why else would El try to convince Mike that she was happy and had friends in California if she wasn’t trying to put up a front for him?
How else would Mike know if Will was being sulky or grumpy if he wasn’t watching Will’s reaction all the time?
————————————————————————
All of these result in different outcomes:
Will sternly tells El that she shouldn’t be faking things and hiding the fact that she’s getting bullied all the time.
El can’t hide her emotions anymore and she bonks her bully in front of Mike— even before that, she demands her bully to just go and tell Mike that it was a joke amongst friends.
Mike lashes out on Will because he’s mad that Will didn’t reach out to him either and calls Will out for being visibly upset the whole day at the rink.
————————————————————————
In conclusion:
Will wants El to be honest to Mike.
El wants to seem happy for Mike.
Mike wants Will to actually be happy.
=
Will is saying it’s okay to be upset in front of Mike.
El is hiding being upset for the sake of Mike.
Mike is trying to make Will not upset anymore.
#phew#okay#I gotta sleep now lmao#glad I got that off of my chest#if y’all say TLDR…. I mean fair enough but damn#will byers#mike wheeler#byler s4#stranger things#byler#michael wheeler#william byers#stranger things s4#stranger things s5#stranger things season 5#stranger things 5#byler season 5#byler s5#byler season 4
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Rant? (potential spoilers?)
Alright, don't hate me for this, but I actually feel bad for Amelia. Firstly, no one's interested in her romantically (story of my life, and let me tell you, that really does your head in sometimes). Secondly, she's been put in the middle of drama multiple times now, for the sake of drama and/or for shaking her already somewhat shady/unsteady relationship with her twin. Thirdly, the guy that is supposedly head over heels with mc (in my game it was Roberto) goes on to kiss Amelia and then she has to act like nothing happened because she doesn't want to cause more drama for her sister, plus, he still acts all pouty around mc and looks disappointed when she doesn't pick him at the recoupling. Who's to say that Zeph didn't actually pine for Amelia the whole time he's been in a relationship with mc, and Amelia just had to watch that with pain all these years?? And now she has to see everyone in the villa swoon over mc, while she is, again, left in the shadow. I meannn, if I were Amelia, I'd probably cry all day or walk, ngl. So no, I don't want to be her enemy, we're siblings and I want us to be on the same team - I don't want any discourse between us, I just want to forget the past and for her to be happy in a couple with someone who genuinely cares for her.
#litg spoilers#i always click the option that says 'we're cool'#i don't want to be enemies with my sister - what kind of family would i be?#idk maybe if i had siblings irl i would say different things but this is like a sibling simulator to me and i want to make things right lol#anyways.. i also didn't like how roberto was awfully quiet during that whole conversation about their kiss on the terrace:/#it rubbed me the wrong way how he just let amelia take the blame completely ignoring his constant grafting with mc after that...#okay i got it off my chest now lol#perhaps this means an amelia fic is in the making lol...#litg#love island the game#litg s6#litg double trouble#litg amelia#litg roberto#litg mc
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things i'd like from bg4 or any similar future games
I think BG3 is very detailed; but I would really like it if the backgrounds had mattered more. Or at least for every one. I heard if you're a drow/half-drow noble you get special dialogue with Minthara. But why didn't my Folk Hero!Tav with Wyll [or just in general?] Or my Outlander!Tav with Karlach? I love that your character gets special interaction with all and sundry, at times, re: class and race. But backgrounds make a charcacter. I don't need details. Just a bit of a nod. At least within the camp.
This brings me to point two. I wish there was a way to get friendship points. It is so strange the characters can be 'meh' about you, dislike you [and strongly], but high to exceptional bonds trigger romance. What about close friendships or growing into a family?
Speaking of, I definitely would have love some down time chatter. It is so strange to me that you get a 'this could be our last time in camp' but don't do anything with it. I appreciate the tiefling [or goblin] party. I love the idle banter on the road. But why not a couple of casual fireside chats. As a group?
I love Halsin but the fact that he is the only one we can have a polyamorous dynamic with, is bull. I'm fine with not every character being into polyam -- but maybe research more before diving into it. I am 90% sure Wyll would've been okay with Polyam - a triad too! - if it was Halsin or Astarion [maybe with Lae'zel but I have to play further to be sure]. I could see Astarion and Shadowheart swinging a 'v' dynamic, and being the best [or worst for Tav's sanity] of metamours! Maybe it would have been a hassle for coding to fit every configuration, but we deserved at least a COUPLE of Tav x Origin x Origin loving.
Also, I think we should have been able to encourage - or maybe it could have happened sans MC involvement - the npcs getting together.
#bg3#baldur's gate#larian studios#i have more thoughts#but that is all im going to say for now#if i got into my frustration about how the only fat characters that are taller than dwarves are evil i'd be here all week#or why is there only ONE character of color in the main cast?? - no karlach doesn't count bc her voice actress is white#i know no one in larian goes here#but if anyone is ever considering an if or a video game! keep this in mind#i really love how games like wayfarer/infamous/dropout/exile [to name to name a few] have 'main' characters who are either#strictly platonic or can differentiate between what dynamic mc will have with the potential romance options#i also love how they have subromances#i wanted to list that too put this was getting long#i also no one but my moots will read this but that's perfect bc we can bitch in peace#nd that's what i wanted to get off my chest#i keep looking at karlach and dammon and being like roflmao why cant theys mooch?#or if pandira was a side/sub romance or lia - i like their fces okay#and im looking forward to adair/shadowheart/halsin but what ive heard there isnt much to be excited about lmao#also there's no bg4. the header is jokes!
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// Woke up today and immediately started brainrotting about xlmi again...Gonna put this one under read more so those who aren't interested can easily skip it.
Basically thinking about how I feel like Xiao would be the little spoon about 90% of the time after they start dating / sharing a bed.
I imagine he's usually out hunting/killing demons until pretty late at night so more often than not, Lumine is already in bed by the time he returns to their shared room at the Inn (or the teapot whichever floats your boat). He wouldn't want her to stay awake for him but we all know she does anyway lol.
These moments would be the hardest on Xiao because it's when he's practically drowning in self-hatred and just feels disgusted by himself. He'd probably insist on always showering/taking a bath first because he doesn't want to join her while reeking of demon blood.
Then when he finally does crawl under the covers, his favorite thing to do is curl up into her arms and bury his face in Lumine's chest as she pampers him with forehead kisses while gently stroking his back. This just makes any negative emotions from before melt away and it's one of the rare moments when he truly does feel at ease.
Another one of my personal xlmi HCs is that his nightmares became significantly less frequent ever since he started sharing the bed with her. I don't think they would entirely go away (at least not right away) but he even starts having some good dreams every now and then which would be completely new to him. uwu
Also Xiao is the CLINGIEST bf ever in the morning fr. Lumine would be like 'I have to get up. I have commissions to do' but he keeps on clinging onto her and begs to stay in bed to cuddle for five more minutes (which actually turns out to be nearly two hours in the end lol).
#;; the admin speaks#xiaolumi#// okay now that I got that off my chest I can do some stuff for work lol
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based on real life events etc. i'm in my hopeless romantic pining era </3
Jake Dillinger could not recall the last time he'd had a crush.
Christine? She was lovely, but could he call that a crush? No, it had been stupid and impulsive- even cruel- of him to try and start something with her just because she was cute and he needed a distraction. Madeline? Absolutely not. Chloe? Maybe, once upon a time. But he barely remembered how that had felt, overshadowed by years of fighting and screaming matches in the hallway and messy hate sex.
And here he was now: lightheaded as he stared up at the ceiling from his bed, heart fluttering and head spinning, Rich Rich Rich Rich the only thing on his mind.
He was painfully gorgeous. Soft blond hair that stuck out in curls all over the place, purple hairdye, freckles like stars, eyes that he could get lost in. Jake would be lying if he said he hadn't noticed that before- but the way his heart skipped at every small smile was completely different from how his stomach used to twist whenever Rich would give him that cold, cruel smirk.
And the smell of coffee and tea always lingering on his clothes, in his hair. Rich had taken to working at a coffee shop recently and of this, Jake was far too aware. The slightest whiff of coffee was enough to make his heart race like he'd had too much, yet he found himself even more addicted than he'd already been.
Jake could have ignored it if it had been anyone else- but Rich always found a way into Jake's life. (Truth be told, it was probably Jake always finding excuses to let him in.) Leaning in close to whisper something to him during class, seemingly unaware of how Jake blushed at how their hands brushed for a fraction of a second. Jake could never keep track of what Rich liked to go on and on about but he could listen to that voice forever.
God, it was all too much. The ceiling seemed to spin as Jake blinked rapidly and though the autumn air was cool, every inch of his skin felt like it was on fire- a fire that started in his chest and threatened to burst through his ribcage. Sparks of gold and green and purple flashed before his closed eyes. Coffee-scented air left him intoxicated and out of breath.
I love you, I love you, I love you. Oh, if only Jake had the courage to let rich hear it.
#bmc#be more chill#richjake#jake dillinger#rich goranski#the abyss writes back to you#okay now i got some of it off my chest gn
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I’m so normal about earthspark brawl.
#transformers#tf#brawl#earthspark#it’s been a tough. ROUGH ASS WEEK.#but you know what? it’s okay. I will survive (after I stress my balls off)#anyway I love brawl and I was so happy (in destress ) to see him in earthspark#HES FUCKIN HUGE#I LOVED IT#SOMEONE PLAY SZA BIG BOY BECAUSE HE WAS BIG MY GAWDDDD YESSSSS#BRO WHEN HE SPINEBREAKED BUMBLEBEE I SHOUTED TO MY ROOF I WAS SO HAPPY#AND THEN HE HIT THE FUCK OUTTA BEE WITH HIS CHEST OF GAWDDD I LOVED THIS MAN#I felt like they got lazy with his fight because brawl can THROW DOWN and I was not feeling that In his fight#EARTHSPARK STOP THROWING IN CHARATERS AND NEVER USING THEN TO THEIR POTENTIAL#HE SHOULD OF BODIED BEE LIKE KILLLLL KILLLL#but brawl my darling I loved you for the few minutes you where In earthspark#HE DIDNT EVEN HAVE A VOICE#I hope he’s okay and then meets up with swindle….#macadam#maccadam#ALSO WHERE WAS HIS BACK CANNONNNN#NEVER SEEN A BRAWL WITH OUT A BACK CANNON#COWARDSSSDS#IM NAWING AT MY ENCLOSURE BARS HOW DAREEEEEEE THEY#BRAWL BRAWL BRAWL#oh brawl i love you
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“i could do without time’s blur” just say you’ve never looked around and realized that everything that is comfortable and familiar has changed around you or, even worse, will one day change and there’s nothing you can do about it there’s no slowing down time there’s no going back the closest you will ever get to the past is the pang of nostalgia you get when something reminds you of the memory and you just have to sit with that . it’s like you haven’t even seen the end of alive from whispering pines episode 426
#it’s 3am i was trying to sleep but i got hit with overwhelming fear that everything and everyone i love will one day cease to exist and how#am i supposed to be okay with that. so of course i turn on time’s blur to really hammer the nails in my chest and im sobbing and its painful#and i remember earlier seeing someone on reddit say they could easily leave time’s blur off of long lost and it’s like. okay. couldn’t be me#anyway my eyes are swollen and puffy time to sleep goodnight whoever sees this kiss kiss
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I genuinely like long hair. I aspire to have long hair and look like a lot of men whos looks i admire.
I got compliments on looking so feminine and pretty recently
I cannot tell u how urgently i desired to shave all my fucking hair off. How unpleasant it felt to just Bam get reminded the way i intepret my own choice for wanting to look Any particular way in this world is always overshadowed by anyone outside me deciding theyd Prefer me a certain way for their own reasons
#rant#anyway. ive sure felt fucked up since then#i love how i look with short hair#to be honest i havent grown out my hair since idk age 9?#at age 22 i had long hair but i was peak dyke/engineering gayboy#i looked like Pat from Bad Buddy all cut sleeve shirts only with long bleach fried hair swept to one side#but i cut it off cause lol. it was dead.#anyway like. i love wearing lolita and wigs. so i was tryibg on some of my new wigs#and then i got comments on how Pretty i looked and i about wanted to jump out of my fucking skin#i do not see myself in long hair wigs as Peak High Femme#but goddamn the person commenting sure did#i just. i havent been so overtly sort of Expected to Be Femme as GOOD since#i used to work customer service and fuckers would come in and hit on me and say ladyyyyy maammmmmm nonstop#i used to have 1 inch long hair. binder flat chest. baggy sweaters. no makeup#and at that old customer service job just many strangers like ur so Cute so Pretty little Lady maam blah blah AAAAAA#and it was about then that i learned. i didnt feel like being butch just to avoid social comments#since it didnt deter the fucking comments. so i decdied back then okay fuck it ill dress and look however i Actually Like Best#for Me. since fuckers will say comments i dont like regardless.#but damn. been a long time since a person actually MADE a comment like that to my face#just. the implication i Ought to have Longer Hair and Look More Feminine. makes me wanna scratch my skin off
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also i just wanted to say that i am low activity pretty much all the time. sometimes i will get hit with spurts of energy and do a million things at once, sometimes my energy is low and it takes me awhile to do anything. this is not an indication of my interest, whether how high it is or a lack of it, in any way. i still make an effort to show partners i'm around or invested by interacting in other ways, like responding to ooc posts and sending memes. if that doesn't work for you though, its best to let me know directly or just unfollow. i'm not apologizing for my activity level or offering explanations as to why it is the way it is anymore ✋ my time is mine and my real life takes priority and sometimes i have no energy, and that's fine !!! take all the time you need and never feel like you need to explain yourselves to me btw, i'm just glad we can all vibe and take a break from adulting <3
#｡˚ 🥀 villain apologist and girlkisser › out.#OKAY I GOT THAT OFF MY CHEST#everyone have a nice day and drink water and remember to have fun !!!#REMEMBER THIS IS A HOBBY AND NOT A JOBBY
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Finally managed to sort out some of my thoughts on how marvel fumbled the marketing for iron fist 2022 and ugh I am SO mad about it now
Like first of all why the hell would you try to keep the identity of the new iron fist a secret
Not only is it obvious to anyone familiar with Lin Lie and/or read DODS: White Fox but the bigger problem is that. Well.
Lin Lie is an obscure character. There's no denying that. And you put the set up for him becoming the next iron fist in a tie-in featuring another, slightly less obscure character.
Ami's never really been pushed so most people aren't going to read her tie-in (which does a great job of introducing both Lie and Ami whilst endearing them to the reader as well). The result is too much exposition needing to be crammed into Lie's story.
What marvel really needed to do was give both Lie and Ami more publicity. Like, maybe give Ami an actual book instead of a four-issue infinity comic (that could tease Lie's return as the new iron fist)? I'm 99% sure that Alyssa Wong wants to write one. Or at least admit that DODS: White Fox is borderline required reading to make sure that the readers know what happened?
You know, since iron fist 2022 isn't a continuation of the previous iron fist storyline? It's a continuation of Lin Lie's story (and Ami's, to a lesser extent) so marvel should have been upfront with that.
But just focusing on the fact that marvel is finally making an asian iron fist simply feels lazy and gives the impression that they're only doing this for free diversity points.
At least they could still fix it with a White Fox & Iron Fist team-up series. You know, just like Power Man & Iron Fist. Except with Ami Han and Lin Lie instead of Danny Rand and Luke Cage. And a bigger focus on the mystical side instead of the street-level one.
Edit: AND the fact that Ami is an actual demon should get more attention. Just imagine Lin Feng trying to turn her into a demon with his magic and she just. slaps him
#the beasties#ami han#lin lie#iron fist 2022#if lie's story continues and ami's not there i will go ballistic#she vowed to stop chiyou at the end of dods and definitely wants to ensure lie doesn't die on her again#i need to see more of their friendship okay#you've convinced me that it developed off-panel#expand on it#they can learn how to use their powers together#they can reconnect with the agents of atlas together#they've got so much potential so stop ignoring them#seething with anger i can't tell if this post is coherent but hey i wrote it so i could get this off my chest
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like it's 2024 why am i seeing MORE sam-is-a-woman stuff here on tumblr.com. there's a difference between calling a male character a babygirl and straight up acting like they're a female character. they're not! stop using female pronouns please!
#i'm not even against the whole female-coded stuff i see the merit with some aspects in e.g. dean but it's important that they're MEN#okay i'm done now got it off my chest 🙏#now hopefully off to do more fun fandom stuff#if only it weren't 2am#*
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I'm dying to know — are your portrayals of Cynthia and Barry connected in anyway? If so, what is their relationship like? Do you have any headcanons regarding Cynthia's connection with Dawn, Lucas and or Barry that you'd like to share? What does she think of them?
First off, THANK YOU for the wonderful question ashford!! I really appreciate it. Shoutouts to you, @gogogobarry (me, hee hee), @distortsverity, @timebranded, @dawnedon and ALL the lovely DPPT protags that I've gotten to write with over time.😊
And the short answer is: yes!! Cynthia's relationship with Barry and the other protagonists is something that I've been mulling over since the beginning of time (move over, Dialga)...so I have a few major thoughts on how Cynthia views all of them.
Most importantly, Cynthia views the protagonists' entanglement with Galactic--and the Galactic arc in sum--as her biggest, most shameful failure. She allowed Cyrus to pull the wool over her eyes regarding Galactic's schemes, and almost lost everything as a result, too busy/preoccupied to notice what was happening right under her nose. If she had been more present, could she have prevented the Lake Valor bombing? The creation of the Red Chain? Perhaps. However, Dawn/Hikari, Lucas, and Barry should have never carried any of that burden, or dealt with any of those problems, to begin with. They were just kids.
The guilt--god, that overwhelming guilt--despite her sessions with Fumiko, Riley, and a few scattered (ultimately unhelpful) therapists, those memories (Galactic's scars) still keep her up deep into the night, cursing her shortsightedness. She had been so obsessed with Sinnoh's rise, that she'd lost sight of those--with good intentions and bad--still on the ground.
Though portrayals view them differently, the Spear Pillar/Distortion World events undoubtedly left the young protags with damage. Trauma. Cynthia (champion or not, depending on timeline) now views their collective well-being as her responsibility. If they need to talk, she'll listen, even if she has to rearrange her entire schedule to do so. She's not a hoverer, but she'll make sure to check in on all of them with comfortable regularity, just ensuring that everything's okay. Cynthia owes them that much, at the very least.
Barry's can-do attitude and sunshiny personality are always appreciated, but Cynthia is there to support him all the same, even if that means hearing out some truly wild business pitches or throwing down for an exhilarating rematch. Or ten.
For the player characters, Cynthia remembers feeling truly useless atop the Pillar, bombarded by confusing visions of past, present and future. Within the Distortion, an overwhelmed Cynthia had relied on Dawn/Hikari/Lucas once again, and they triumphed over Cyrus, one last time. (She had asked too much of them then, and she is still haunted by it. She'll never forget the frustrating helplessness that she had felt in that void...)
Nowadays, Cynthia is making up for lost time. Whenever the protagonists (or really anyone) needs her, they'll find a reliable pillar of strength. Attentive, thoughtful, and--though her eyes still wander skyward on occasion--grounded in the moment. A shining inspirational beacon for all of Sinnoh to look up to.
To become stronger, Cynthia has steeled a part of herself, becoming more private and guarded, trying her best to ignore the tantalizing memory of the divine spark that had shocked her atop the Pillar back then. She maintains a selfless vigil over the protagonists and all of Sinnoh, because it is her duty. Because it is her penance.
Cynthia cannot afford to fail again. The weight of a region rests on her shoulders, and she wouldn't have it any other way. She can take this.
She will keep watch.
#intriguant#(GOD OKAY I got carried away LMAO)#(tysm for this ask!! I really needed to just get ALL of this off my chest i guess)#(I love sinnoh.)#star pieces. (hcs)
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