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#oh my goodness i didnt see how long this was
ew-selfish-art · 7 months
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Dpx Dc AU: Ectoplasm is required for Ghosts to be visible to the human eye- And Danny creates his own ectoplasm.
Danny is visiting Jazz in Gotham and its weird how friendly everyone is. Like, the city gets a really bad rapport, everywhere he goes there is someone trying to strike up a conversation or answer his questions about getting around to the tourist spots. A few people even pointed out restaurants and ways to find off the beaten path gems! Jazz seems to role her eyes at him, but when he brings up her 'roommate' being kind of cute she flat out laughs.
Danny then comes to understand the Jazz doesn't have a roommate and that Ghosts in Gotham don't move far from their haunts- He's just been inadvertently turning these undead folks visible by accident of generating abnormal amounts of ectoplasm.
Which, is comforting in a way, he's never walking this dangerous city alone and really, most of the ghosts have been really friendly! They disappear once he's a few blocks away from them anyway.
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Tim Drake is having a horrible day.
He'd been given intel that one of Black Mask's guys was going to snitch but that he'd died before given the opportunity to reach out to the GCPD. He tracks down the guy's last know whereabouts and yikes. Its next to the Theater. Tim was often grateful for his childhood obsessions, this time it backfired.
Tim and Bruce get into an argument about trust and respect and, worst of all, mental health. And even though Tim was vehemently against Batman accompanying Red Robin to the alleyway - that's exactly what happens.
They arrive and Bruce is closing up faster than a clam in the contaminated Gotham Bay- Clearly being in the Alley bothers him. No fucking shit. RR gets started on collecting evidence, there are a few extra blood splatters and a single left shoe... When a kid walks into the Alley.
"Uh, sorry to intrude-" The kid looks scared shitless, and runs away. And then, all of a sudden, Batman and Robin aren't alone in the Alley.
Tim can hardly believe his eyes as the dead man appears and quickly blabs Black Mask's bank passwords and what the plan had been- and While he's over joyed to have that closure, he turns around to Batman weeping in the arms of his parents.
The ghosts fade, and the emotions are certainly charged as this was never something Bruce or Tim would have ever dreamed of happening. Ghosts in Gotham. Talking, floating, granting closure.
"RR, Bats, come in." Oracle calls into their ears.
"Reporting in, but, uh, we need a minute."
"A minute? We have a case on 4th and-"
"O, we just saw the ghosts of the Waynes. It's going to be a minute."
"...Lots of Ghost reports lately then. Any chance you saw a kid looking like he could be adopted?"
"Yeah, actually, black hair and blue eyes. He was super polite before he ran away."
"We have work to do. Oracle, lets prioritize finding our person of interest and divert Nightwing and Robin to the case on 4th." Batman cut between them on the comms and he sounded... calmer than either of them anticipated.
---
Jazz is no longer laughing when Batman appears at her door explaining that he's looking for Danny (Who already flew away from town to get a good night's sleep before class on Monday). Turns out Danny reunited the man with his dead parents just briefly- and then the second guy appears and mentions how Danny had also given a guy who'd been murdered by a Mob enough time to explain the ongoing threats the city faced.
Jazz just rolls her eyes and says that it's not like the ghosts are going anywhere anytime soon and Danny will visit in another month. When pressed, she just explains that her brother is a weirdo. No of course he doesn't have powers. Gaslight and Girlbosses her way out.
And Jazz thinks that the game is up for at least another month, obviously when Danny visits more shit will stir up, but then this new guy appears.
Unlike the other Bats who are keen on watching her from a distance, the Red Hood knocks on her door. Are her eyebrows all the way into her hairline when Red Hood asks her to send his thanks along to Danny because somehow this whole situation led to his Dad expressing remorse for his actions and apologizing? Yes, yes they are.
But Jazz can smell Dissertation Data off of these vigilantes- Who is she to send them away? Jazz welcomes Red Hood into her place for a cup of tea and a small chat.
The story then devolves into Jazz getting shit done, Danny being cute by proximity and also bringing ghosts to the party, and the Bats having trauma resolve between them.
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nerosdayinanime · 1 month
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beautiful that we get a nice wet beast wednesday to start off mermay, no?
gay little fish but i made him look like a blue sea dragon
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retros-artandstuff · 3 days
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vriska + a transmasc dave doodle
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#tryna get into colored pencils again we'll see how it goes#its been a while since ive done a good tag ramble#but like i dont hv anything to ramble about#my art#traditional art#doodles#fanart#homestuck#homestuck fanart#dave strider#dave strider fanart#vriska serket#vriska fanart#oh actually i do hv smth to ramble about today#that being scheduled posts#yknow scheduled posts are actually really convinient and helped me quite a bit#like i used them for a couple months and honestly really liked useing them cuz it allowed me to hv a pretty consistent posting schedule#but in the end i just didnt feel right with it mostly due to the fact that even with it set to post three times a week it felt weird to hav#some of my drawings posting weeks after i finished them. like they were old news to me already but they were barely being released to every#one else it just felt weird for me ig. not to mention that like on the rare occassions that i didnt have anything to post i felt obliged to#draw smth just so i would have smth to post and most of the time that led to me being unhappy with my art. so now ive just decided like fuc#it imma post whenever i want and honestly im really happy with that even if i might be going a little trigger happy with the posting button#recently lmao. ive just been drawing a whole lot and hv so much to post its insane. hell i still hv things in my gallery that i needa post#but ill save those for the next couple of days lol but yeah thanks for coming to my very long ted talk/ramble and goodnight 😴#damn im such a yapster what the hell
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maraschinotopped · 4 days
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undertale yellow. clutches head in anguish.
#[cherry on top]#undertale yellow spoilers#[..its still you]#anyways. finished my uty playthrough yesterday. oh my god.#^ that might be a bit of a surprise given that ive said like. nothing about it on here#but honestly i felt like positive-neutral about the game for most of it. like yeah it was good;#but nothing that drove me crazy. yknow? it was just an overall good game.#which is why i didnt really say anything about it#then it started picking up near the middle-end with the steamworks-#i enjoyed axis and guardener a lot; ceroba was a cool party member;#and the music in steamworks goes hard. one of my favorite tracks tbh#then there was the buildup to cerobas fight.#then i /got/ to cerobas fight and. crumples up into a ball AAUUUUUUUUUU#OH MY GODDDDDD#something about it made me shatter into a million tiny pieces.#a lot of things did actually. like how HARD IT WAS#i was stuck on her for OVER AN HOUR#BUT I DID IT. I DID IT LEGIT. IT WAS SO SATISFYING WHEN I FINALLY BEAT HER#god im just insane about ceroba rn. women who fuck up everything big time#and see no other option other than to dig their hole deeper because they sure as hell arent getting out of it#OH AND THE ENDING... BECAUSE OH MY GODDDD OF COURSE CLOVER WOULD DO THAT AHUGHHHHH#THEY'RE THE JUSTICE SOUL. THEY WANTED TO BRING MONSTERS TO JUSTICE AFTER ALL THEY FACED#OF FUCKING COURRSSSEEEEEEE AAAUUGHHHHH <- wail of anguish#KILLING AND MAIMING AND BITING.#SORRY. i needed to lose it for my mental health. quoting that one tiktok: 'im craeezay. im insaaane!'#for other tidbits i wanted to mention:#cerobas bossfight music went HARD. i fucking love the phase 3 transition especially with her yelling as the music starts;#that black hole attack can go fuck itself;#and if you were wondering how long it took me to beat uty. it was around 10-11 hours for a pacifist route.#anyways i totally need to play more games. that was fucking awesome and i need to experience more things like that
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hailsatanacab · 9 months
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close enough to be whole again || chapter 18
🎊 new chapter update new chapter update new chapter update 🎊
#dpxdc#dpxdc fic#dcxdp#dcxdp fic#desktop tumblr lets you edit links to put a title instead of 'show chapter' but mobile doesnt 😭😭😭#oh hello guys how are you i didnt see you there!!#dont mind me just casually dropping a chapter after........... too many months being inactive#im so sorry#ive been trying to get the other writing ive got going out of the way but like#theyre all turning into monsters too!!#idk how i feel about this chapter :/#the next chapter is going to have to undergo major rewrites before its posted#but! BUT! ive got a solid idea of where it goes after that so thats good news!!#because i was really stumped for such a long while#....... now i just gotta write it tho haha#after my holiday!! then its fic time BaBey!!!#poor danny in this chapter - poor damian too#at this point damian isnt necessarily against the idea of ghosts being (he knows ghosts are real!) its just more of a#'if ghosts arent real than danny is just confused and hes not dead please hes not dead dont let him be dead' sort of situation#ya get me?#promise they will talk about it and it will get better#just..... its gonna be a few chapters 😬#also in an earlier draft danny called dan a little bitch but damian misinterpreted it as danny calling damian a little bitch#and that was so funny to me - BUT to me it read more in damian's way so like i didnt want danny to get readers like that too#so i took it out but i kinda wish id left it in because its Funny#uh hmmm what else............... bruce sure is surprised about ghosts in amity huh#thats the trouble with writing Smart People#for i am Not Smart#BUT i do know the plot so that helps!!#anyway!! im at limit so let me say thank you for waiting ily all and i hope you enjoy it!! ily ily ily and thank you thank you thank you 🩷
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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 month
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...
#oh lads. its not looking good for my genomics exam on Thursday. its all fucked#i dunno. its just been a weird day. bc one of my lab mates is getting ready to go to the astr0biology science conference#and its just so wild how i got here. into the perfect position. i have a great advisor. a great phd project. a committee member who is super#integrated with n4sa astr0biology projects. and so many of the instructors are amazing. my genomics prof is terrifyingly smart#so is my advisor and his wife. and the program is great. ecology and Evolution. its perfect. its all perfect#and yet. and yet. it just feels like its all falling apart. ive lost that compulsive thing thats always set in my chest#and now all i want to do is lay on the floor and cry and sleep and not do anything. why am i so tired?#its just so frustrating. and im sure ive got the most wretched vibes bc im constantly like 1 comment away from bursting into tears#like 2 weeks and its done. then im off to find a summer job. and find a long term job. and consider throwing away everything ive ever worked#toward. just let it all burn. im so tired. and i dont get to see my therapist until Monday. thats gonna b fun#hi. hello. since last i saw you my life has crumbled into pieces. ugh. i just dont wanna fail this genomics exam but it looks like that's#where we're headed. maybe i should have just dipped out of these last 3 weeks. but no. i didnt want to leave the lady i ta for 100 lab#reports to unexpectedly have to grade 4 days before grades are due. ugh. itll b fine. i mean it wont but whatever#unrelated
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the school arc to me is so good because it drags ciel out of his position as a powerful figure and literally places him in the shoes of the person he could have been. the circus arc ALSO drags him out of his position as big bad queens watch dog/head of the phantomhive estate but the school arc feels like a mockery of a future that never was. this is what he could have been had his parents not died. and even then its NOT because he will never be that kid.
he never was.
#ramblings#incoherent beyond belief its 4 am#and im trying to avoid manga spoilers#might add a reblog with more coherent thoughts when i wake up but im off my meds so i cant promise anything#actually correction im being vague w the manga spoilers#manga readers know whats up#idk if there are any anime only ppl who havent been spoiled on The Plottwist Ever yet#but i figured there will be new fans and though im not tagging this it might still get seen so#cant WAIT to see our boy absolutely miserable in animation form should they recreate that arc LMAOOO#which ofc is after the germany arc so thats still a long time away#but STILL. itd be fun i need to see this young teenager lose his mind in color with sound#him relying on sebastian to do all his fag duties (sorry. dredge) so he can work his way up the social ladder#trying to gain power while simultaneously proving that he cant do anything but rely on others#hes always needed help in basically every way and he hasnt CHANGED he just got a demon to do it for him#he learns to lie and charm and cheat and all the while hes a fucking CHILD WHO STILL STRUGGLES WITH NORMAL THINGS#ciel is my little baby and i love him deeply no matter how much of a little bitch he can be#his helplessness isnt just 'oh he was raised in british high society' its also that he never got the chance to learn anything#which to elaborate on that id also have to go into manga territory. iykyk#like absolutely at this point he just refuses to learn how to do things he has a pet demon to do it for him#but.#hi the phantomhives backstory is killing me again its so late#both atlantic and the school arc are just setup for the Big Arc but theyre very good in their own right i SWEAR#also when i rewatched the circus arc a while back and i realised how some scenes were shot#the heavy foreshadowing that i didnt realise. yk. 7 years ago or however long its been since i first watched it#CRAZY#if you are new. to kuroshitsuji. and you havent read the manga. dear god. read the manga#ALSO GRELLE IN THAT ARC IS SO BEAUTIFUL & OTHELLO IS TRANSMASCULINE. OKAY GOODBYE
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seithr · 1 month
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i finished unicorn overlord i have immense haead trauma now
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anaalnathrakhs · 2 months
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it's rlly fun how my parents just straight up. do not care. about the disordered eating. we had all this talk back when i went through a big suicidal crisis a couple months ago, i explained what was really difficult for me, eating socially, restaurants, not choosing my food, etc, and now it's like. okay it didn't exist actually.
mother i am not going to order you around, either you accept that i'm gonna have difficulty dealing with "normal people behavior" or whatnot and you stop looking at me like :/ anytime i am anything but ecstatic at the idea of eating anything anytime anyhow, or you adapt your behavior to avoid the results you don't like to see. i'm only doing my best to handle things from my side, and i am certainly not going to try measuring for you how important family social eating occurences are to you.
#''we should talk abt it uwu'' WE TALKED ABOUT IT. STOP COMPLAINING THAT DOING STUFF THAT I CAN'T EASILY HANDLE MAKES ME WEIRD.#EITHER YOU ASSUME IT'S GOING TO MAKE ME WEIRD BECAUSE YOU KNOW EXACTLY HOW AND WHY#OR YOU STOP DOING IT IF IT'S SO UWU HEARTBREAKING UWU FOR YOU TO WATCH#i'm not happy about how guilty i am too of that specific brand of ''oh this is so sad *continues doing nothing*'' form of ''compassion''#they just want me to perform anorexia recovery for them#so they can feel okay we're doing a good job at raising a normal child#they don't give a shit as long as the compusive eating is my mom's meal at the dinner table#just like they didnt care when i had roughly the same problems but not as bad before i had a restrictive phase#i cannot compromise because then WHAT im just hurting my parents for a situation that doesnt make me any happier either?#i do not want to live with them. i do not want to go place or do activities with them.#i dont want to talk to them most of the time and im perfectly willing to handle the times it could be cool to.#but it's really hard to start developping a life of your own when you first of all need like two weeks of total life-reset#quiet at home#and ''at home'' there's your parents who will simply not stop trying to pull you into going random bullshit places#and i can't say no. because the places ARE interesting and time-limited. and it makes them happy. and what am i gonna do anyway?#keep doing nothing on the computer and wait for them to come back to keep doing only the shittiest parts of this unsatisfactory routine?#try to do some work in the house or go out. for them to see that something happened?#i dont know how to live like a normal person#literally not once in my life have i been able to think ''oh i need to do X'' and then just. do X. prepare what's necessary for doing X.#go out and do X. i have to keep stuck at this computer or in this room or with this book.#because there is a million different obstacles to every single thing i'm trying to achieve and half of them are parents-shaped.#everything hurts holy shit#broadcasting my misery#vent#ed tw
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semercury · 2 days
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Spent $5 on the digital remains, and I feel bad bc I'm anxious with money rn for understandable reasons, but ultimately I am glad I got it. The booklet was really neat to look through, and seeing crossed out lyrics and how the songs evolved is really special to me. Also the live tracks were fun to listen to, despite my headache.
#stuff sarah says#i want to crawl inside his brain and take a look around and understand the process#i want to have a long conversation with him about writing and the creative process#i probably never could. im too shy. and he has that midwest sarcastic avoidance aggressive type#and ive got that midwest sarcastic avoidance avoidant type#idk. this whole album is just really special to me#might have to see if i can burn a physical cd of it from the digital album and keep it in my car or smth#if i ever end up super financially stable i want to get a record player and as many records of theirs as i can#my oldest little cousin has one and listening to it made me want one. music just sounds nice on a record player#oh also listening to the live tracks made me wonder if ill ever be able to see them live#ive been to one (1) concert in my life when i was less anxious of a person and it was surprisingly roomy#ive seen videos of their concerts. everyones packed like sardines. everyones yelling (like on the tracks)#if i could guarantee it would be a good day i think id be fine#but like im im anxious that day or have a headache (my head is pounding rn...) like...#idk. maybe the adrenaline would make it go away#i remember talking to my mom about how they have shows near me in october but i didnt think i could go#bc of money + anxiety + other stuff and shes like well your birthday is in november#and its just like... i dont know what life will look like next month. much less october...#like i dont want to make plans and buy tickets and then have to cancel bc of a funeral or sudden changes you know?#anyway. the booklet is really cool#i wish they sold the journal by itself bc i really want that lol
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mewtwo24 · 19 days
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You know reading vol 5 of mdzs before all the rest (don't ask me why I'm a clown and there were Circumstances) has to be the craziest experience of my life. Because it took all of ten minutes of wwx talking to literally hit me so hard in the gut I had to sit down and listen to really loud music for a while to calm down.
Who needs therapy when mxtx is alive and writing, I guess????? 🤡
Can't wait to get to the actual tragic parts I just know I'm gonna be that "help" frog phone meme
#mdzs#i was really out here thinking svsss would be my fave bc of lbh#and then i finally get around to reading mdzs and it blows my expectations out of the fucking water holy actual shit#and i just had this feeling the first time i read parts of it like 'oh. this series is going to kill me. im not coming back from this.'#and here i am booboo the fool getting my clown ass make-up on#idk how to explain it like i just fucking LOVE mxtx's takes on arrogance#that wwx is constantly being perceived as a show off and an incorrigible flirt and a know it all#how wwx cant always help the ways he acts out the desperation that has embedded itself into his very bones#how wwx only ever wanted to do the right thing and that having been so much of his downfall#how his worth and talent would always be eclipsed by virtue of his circumstances#how he's above needing recognition at his core but at the same time longs for an ounce of good will and positive recognition ->#how human he is despite his brilliance. how he never gets it no matter how hard he tries to be worthy.#like to me wwx is emblematic of what it means to be poor/an immigrant in high places#always villified always alien always wrong always unwelcome#no matter how clever or capable or kind youll always be an eyesore because you don't 'act right'. not 'one of them.' you never will be.#i just...the way he just wanted it all to be over by the end. the way he didnt even want to come back to life. that he was sick of it all.#im rattling the bars of my cage i love him I LOVE HIM i love him#i understand you lan wangji (and i love lwj too)#and even lan wangji too like. the way so many of their issues in the beginning stems from that self-same problem#how lwj couldn't live with his out of control feelings how he too couldn't quite lay down his pride#how lwj was also trapped by the expectations of his clan in his own way how so much of their separation was a form of penance#that the calamity of wwx's loss forced him to reconsider everything he thought he knew about himself and his life#how he was left with nothing but regret. how when wwx returns--lwj refuses to leave anything to chance this time#he refuses to let wwx be alone anymore--refuses to let him hurt himself for the sake of others refuses to just let it all happen#even if it means overstepping a boundary or propriety it doesn't matter--as long as wwx stays with him. pride be damned#god i just can't i just can't do it im biting im ripping things apart GOD#will also say the jokes about lwj being like. 'strict moral compass or BUST.' and then wwx literally committing like 17 felonies in the bg#while lwj is like 'crimes? what crimes. nothing to see here.' NEVER stops being funny. like i was pissing myself laughing#i know its a known trope but by god are they hilarious about it#also. lan qiren how many times do your nephews have to go catatonic for you to stop with the catholic guilt and repression
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dreamcast-official · 4 months
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huh.
#eli.txt#idk i think ive been slowly forgiving my sister for how deeply hurt i felt when she moved out bc now I Get It. like I Get It#when she moved out i was. 9. and in my head i thought she had left because of me. because i wasnt the easiest kid in the world and i know-#-she had a hard time dealing with me when we were alone. we're so far apart in age we couldnt connect for most of my life. and in my head#that was the reason she left home. bc of me. bc she was tired of *me.*#i know now thats not true. and i understand now why she had to leave because if she felt the way im feeling then goddamn im glad she got ou#this feeling SUCKS. nd like#yeah this probably has to do with my father's daughter and the fact that she refused to even meet me until our dad died.#it took my dad dying for my sister to even be in the same room as me. that really messed with me as a kid. like it REALLY did.#so when my sister left home i just kinda went. oh okay neither of my sisters want anything to do with me! i will be alone forever! got it!#AND I KNOW NOW THATS NOT TRUE ON EITHER OF THEIR ENDS. I DONT HAVE A GOOD RELATIONSHIP W MY DADS DAUGHTER AND I PROBABLY NEVER WILL#BUT I DONT HOLD ANYTHING AGAINST HER ANYMORE BC GOD HER MOTHER WAS AWFUL AND I GET WHY SHE DIDNT WANT TO MEET ME BC OF EVERYTHING#BUT LIKE. THAT MESSED ME UP AND I JUST STRAIGHT UP ASSUMED BOTH MY SISTERS HATED ME FOR SO LONG.#AND NOW THAT I ALSO FEEL LIKE I NEED TO LEAVE I CAN SEE SO CLEARLY. MY SISTER NEVER HATED ME I WAS NEVER THE REASON SHE LEFT.#I CAN LET GO OF HOW HURT I FELT BECAUSE I ALSO NEED TO LEAVE#god i dont wanna hurt my mom though.#dont think i could leave her completely alone in this apartment. i dont think i can do that.#anyway. hi tumblr did you like todays oversharing episode
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lecliss · 6 months
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I will never be able to take Obito seriously in the Tobi outfit. I just can't. That's not Madara, that's not a guy stuck in Hell, that's not a villain capable of horrors beyond our comprehension. That will always be the mask of a school girl in love with his senpai to me and nothing else. Well, okay maybe except Guruguru and whatever the fuck he kept talking about literal shit for. But Kishi fucked up thinking anyone is supposed to take the Tobi disguise seriously at this point.
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todayisafridaynight · 10 months
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your wrist was hurting sorry man I know how drawing and presumably college work does that get well soon ❤️‍🩹
LMAO NAW ITS FINE for one thing my hurt wrist is my non-writing/drawing hand so i can still draw/write/use utensils, drawing's just a lot slower without my hotkeys so i figure this is a sign i should take a proper break and rest up. plus i hurt my wrist rollerskating so dont worry i didnt sprain anything from drawing too much
#snap chats#genuinely surprising ive not seriously hurt my left wrist from drawing#i mean- some years back my wrist did really hurt for a few days but i dont think it was as bad of a strain as this#i take real good care of my left wrist since then anyhow so im not worried about getting another drawing-induced injury#like i said last ask tho my wrist feels a lil better compared to yesterday so hopefully i can get back to it soon#got plenty of things i wanna doodle and write and while i can write with one hand... this is a nightmare LMAO#'snap i thought you were sleeping' uhhhhh Oops <3 i started playing y7 again but before i did i was watching a vid#and now im watching it agan so.. lol#so funny while i was playing tho my sis walked in and started watchin and crackin jokes#shes so funny... SO FUNNY she saw sawashiro and was like 'wow he looks like a real guy'#to which Of Course i was like 'oh yeah its cause hes modeled after a real guy :)' an she was like OOOOHHHH ok#and then she saw arakawa and was like 'see he doesnt look real' and then i had to be like 'bro hes Also based off a real guy' LMAO#yeah... super silly.... i always love playin games when shes around even if shes never SUPER invested#i appreciate that she still watches an can still be funny. goofy as hell she was like 'these cutscenes are so long--#didnt uou play this game last summer ??? how many times have you played this' and i was just Uuuuhhh Seven :)#LMAO HER FACE but she was all 'awww :)' when i tol her i was letting the cutscenes play out so she could watch#ok im done rambling i just said typing like this is a nightmare and it is so im stopping now BYE
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wigglebox · 2 years
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okay so i have an idea for a very long story. i figured out how i wanted it to end, so let me know what y’all think. 
--
i’m thinking it can be just one part but to really flesh it out, it should probably be four parts [like four separate books]: the beginning, which establishes everything, the first middle part which will probably be shorter but it’ll establish the world after the events of the first part, the second middle part which starts to ramp up the stakes more for the main characters, and then the final part which is where all the events of the previous three parts come together and we get some emotional beats from the characters and badda bing badda boom. 
but the think i’m going to have running through all the parts, starting with the later bits of the first part, is a romance. this is when i need y’alls help. 
Jacob and Nashua meet in the first part. They’re our protagonists. They’re kind of like, not friends, but allies. They come from opposite sides of a war fought between the people and its rulers [Jacob is on the side of the people and Nashua is a prince/commander of some troops and loyal to the crown] but once they meet, Nashua especially starts to question his own role in things. 
But in the first part, the only relationship that’s growing is friendship. I’m thinking this can be like, a slow burn enemies to friends to lovers kind of deal. it’s going to take a lot to write it but oh well. 
So the first book will have Nashua seemingly sacrificing himself for another character’s wellbeing. I’m not going to make that the end of the first book though because I don’t want to end on that cliffhanger lol, but I am thinking it can be the second to last ‘part’ of this book. It’ll take another couple of chapters to realize he’s still okay, which is good! And then i’ll have the first book end with Jacob and Nashua still parting ways but the war is over and Jacob is unsatisfied because he lost people he loved but Nashua basically tells him that this is just the new normal, and that they have to make sacrifices for freedom, etc etc. 
The second book will be a little shorter I think because it’s really just going to exist to establish a world post-first book war. Jacob is going to be struggling, Nashua isn’t going to be around as much, even though he and Jacob are friends, and Nashua is going to be insistent that he has to now take on a rising force inside the kingdom trying to seize power. Jacob will try to ask how he can help but will get rebuffed. It’s Nashua’s fight, not Jacob’s. 
By the midpoint of the book you learn that Nashua is getting into some nasty shit in order to take down this threat and by the midpoint, Jacob is trying to convince Nashua to not go down that path which now includes some dark magic bullshit, but Nashua is so caught up in the desire to take down this rise in power by this other character, and he enjoyed the small rewards from the magic he’s already tried, that he doesn’t listen. 
Because he doesn’t listen, he winds up unleashing a powerful, evil force into their world. Nashua also dies, and Jacob spends the second half of the book upset about it and struggling to contain the force that Nashua unleashed. 
But by the end of the book, Nashua is back — however now he and Jacob are going to be blown to the shadow world in which the evil forces came from. That’s how the book ends, and we don’t know now if ANY of them are alive. 
The third book will contain the after effects of book 2 wihle still playing off of the turmoil of book 1. Jacob comes back without Nashua and is struggling because of it but wont’ tell anyone really what happened in the shadow world in full detail. Finally we learn that Nashua was still stuck in the shadow world because he is punishing himself for the damage he caused in their own world. He doesn’t want to face it, he doesn’t want to keep on living his life like he didn’t just cause a lot of damage. But Nashua does eventually come back but it’s for a sinister reason. Magic folk who are mad at him are trying to brainwash him. 
The whole third book won’t be as long as the first book but it’ll still esablish a lot: The first part will be a development of Nashua and Jacob’s realationship. The second and third parts of the book will highlight Jacob’s own fall from grace in the desire to save those he loves but in turn it really screws him up and Nashua is helpless to stop it. The fourth part of the book will introduce an antagonist who is misunderstood herself, but will also serve to highlight Nashua and Jacob’s relationship even more, specifically the pining portion of it. 
And finally the third book will end happy, actually. The antagonist turned out not to be so bad after all, no one dies, Nashua and Jacob are still on the ground together, etc etc. 
The final book will be an emotional one as we lead up to the end. Nashua is going to die again, this time seemingly for real. I’m going to have the first several chapters again devoted to Jacob’s reaction which is going to be more intense than before now that they’ve gone through all these events together and it’s going to be clear now that friendship is not just friendship but there’s something else blooming as well [romance]. 
Nashua eventually comes back but before he does, I’m going to establish this other shadow world in which he was held. It is more like a spirit world. And it’s scary as hell. 
The book will continue on with some things, I haven’t quite landed on it exactly but I”m going to have Jacob put in a scary position again as he tries to save everyone, and I’m going to introduce a character that also helps highlight Nashua’s emotional journey from soulless prince, devoutee to the crown, to where he is now. The character will be the child of someone Nashua met up with in book four. He promised he’d take care of the child, so he does. Jacob doesn’t like the child as much because he views the kid as the reason for Nashua’s most recent death, which was traumatizing. 
But they all work it out. 
However, when the kid [I haven’t named them yet idk a name???] falls ill and dies, Nashua pulls out the stops to try and get him back and make him okay. 
But, by doing that, he makes a secret deal with the spirit world that Jacob, nor really anyone but the child, knows about. 
After that, we finally learn of our real villain who is THEE king, THEE person who has been calling the shots. It was the character we were introduced to in the first book, the one that Nashua first sacrifices himself for and the one we thought would be an ally. 
He had shown up again in book three, and we get the indication that he was not just a random village resident, but he still isn’t sinister. Now we learn that he’s actually been calling the shots the entire time and has had a finger in almost every aspect of their lives. 
Jacob is sent into a tail spin mentally about what parts of his life were meddled with and which parts were authentic. Nashua is determined to keep headstrong and figure out how to stop The Bad Guy. I’ll even have Nashua tell Jacob that both of them together are “real” which will imply that if they are together in a chapter, then the events taking place are likely events not being meddled with. 
By the end of book four, their relationship together is very obvious. It’s way more than just friendship, but they still haven’t said Those Words Yet TM. 
However, as they’re running up to the final battle, Nashua and Jacob get pinned down by an adversary. I haven’t decided what character I want this to be, probably a neutral one that’s maybe been influenced by the true bad guy, but I haven’t decided. But in any case, I want them to be virtually unkillable. 
Because now I want to envoke that deal that Nashua made with the spirit world. Only the spirit world would be able to take down this adversary, and if the adversary isn’t taken down, then Jacob is likely going to die, but Jacob has to stick around until the end. 
So instead, I’m going to have Nashua finally activate the terms of his deal in order to sacrifice himself to take down the adversary. It sounds like a boring ‘we’ve already done this’ scene but I’m going to make it really beautiful. 
Like, straight up I’m going to have Nashua sing Jacob’s praises, tell Jacob how amazing he is, how good he is deep down and how Jacob helped Nashua change, and how Nashua learned so much, and that Jacob isn’t just a fighter for the people but really a good person and a loving person. It’s going to be a long speech, but I think it’s worth it. 
I’m going to have it encompass their journey together over the last three [althought at this point since we’re near the end, four] books and it’s going to be VERY impactful. The spirit world is coming, and the deal that’s been hanging over Nashua’s head and indeed the readers’ head will finally be acted on. 
Nashua is going to the spirit world, that’s always been in the cards. You will understand that he is going to the spirit world and there’s no coming back from that. This will really feel like THEE final death for Nashua, and it’ll be sad, but it’ll also be emotionally satisfying because I’m going to have it so you feel like Nashua has been wanting to say all this for a long time now, like a very long time, but never could. 
Like this scene has the emotional impact and weight as only a multi-book slowburn romance could have. 
Nashua says I Love You because his knowledge of Jacob knowing he’s loved and that he is loving in return is enough for Nashua to find some kind of peace and enact the spirit world deal. 
Jacob is just too stunned to speak, he doesn’t know what to do if he should tackle Nashua to stop the spirit world from coming or shut him up so the spirit world doesn’t come or what — but since we know Jacob feels the same way, we aren’t shocked when instead what comes out of his mouth is ‘don’t do this’ because this isn’t how he wanted this to happen. We know he feels the same way, and them talking about it shouldn’t have been here, but at a moment of peace where they could finally open up to each other. 
But instead, Jacob doesn’t get a chance to say I Love You back [sorry, I know that’s frustrating] and Nashua is taken with a smile on his face. We’re going to end that chapter with Jacob on the floor, crying his eyes out, alone. 
Okay, now, here’s the final two chapters — I hope you’re still with me here:
Jacob picks himself up and finds that kid that’s been palling around with them since he’s integrel to the defeat of The Bad Guy TM. Jacob also finds his sibling who also has skin in the game, and some other powerful creatures. 
I’m not going to have Jacob really focus on the emotional weight of Nashua’s sacrifice though because I have too much story to wrap up and at this point, it’s not about their relationship anymore, right? So yeah, they all team up, they are betrayed by some magic person who turns out to be working for The Big Bad, but no big deal it’s fine. I’m going to have Jacob say something like “That’s not who I am” when the Bad Guy expects Jacob to kill him like Jacob has killed before — and I think that’ll be enough acknowledgement to the previous chapter. The chapter ends with the bad guy defeated, and the kid who now has the bad guy’s powers is just gonna peace out because I don’t need to care about him anymore. 
Also I have decided by this point, after one scene in the chapter where Jacob thinks Nashua is back, and says his name, that that moment will be the last time Jacob acknowledges Nashua. It’s just too annoying to have to keep talking about it, right?
So anyway. The final chapter! Or I guess this is just the epilogue? I haven’t decided yet. 
Jacob and his sibling kind of go back to how they had been doing things. No acknowledgement about the people they’ve lost, really no acknowledgement about Nashua. Jacob’s sibling says Nashua’s name once but grouped together with others, kind of like an after thought. 
Jacob gets wounded very badly and winds up at the castle. He now has to stay there. I’m not going to give an explanation as to why, but he just has to stay there. He doesn’t really do anything, but he sees some old friends, which I guess is nice. It’s a different life than the one he just left, but that’s okay. He’s just gonna loaf around. He’s deserved it! He’s deserved some chill time with some old friends that have been taken in by the crown as well and who also seems to have fun there. It’s also more realistic. 
Also, guess who is there as well??? NASHUA! Nashua has been in the castle the entire time! 
I dont’ think i’m going to explain how in the course of one chapter he goes from the spirit world to the castle. He’s just going to be there. I know there’s not a lot of time between his big speech and his scene where he leaves, his sacrifice, but that’s okay. He’s there! 
I thought about including a few chapters of Jacob trying to figure out how to get Nashua out of the spirit world but I figured it’s easier if Nashua just shows up. Less writing for me to do, and by now I would have done a lot of the writing, and I imagine my editor would just like to have an ending and be done with it. 
Nashua is back at the castle! The castle in which tortured him and brainwashed him and was the source of a lot of his grief, even the place he’s fought against a few times by now with Jacob and his friends and family, but it’s okay because he’s helping to change the Castle’s culture. I don’t know how he’s doing it, but it’s implied. He just does it. Or maybe I’ll imply that he did it with the kid who wound up getting into power, but I’m not gonna show the kid either. 
But he’s back! He’s back! It only took a chapter, and we don’t know how he’s back, but he’s back. No explanation, no reasoning, no chapters highlighting how he got out, he’s just out. 
I know his final scene was emotional and implied he was going to the spirit world for good but HA subvert those expectations! Bam! And since both Nashua and Jacob are there together, to call back to the “we are” (real) moment between them, that means that this setting indeed is real! Everything here is now real and not being meddled with. 
And they lived happily ever after in this Castle, no questions asked. 
.........
and this is why i don’t lke the concept of cas being in heaven in 1520.
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eeby · 1 year
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