#not really cuz im not really writing rn | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

livingprophecy · 1 year

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bro i don’t have the focus rn to write but when i do i feel like it’s muses people aren’t interested in and it’s killing me

#negativity tw /#not really cuz im not really writing rn #but i have muse for like. three characters and two are ocs #and two of them are modern warfare related because i have insane brain rot #like talk to me about soap and mara pls that’s al i can handle rn #and seleste in her mw2 verse JDBSBSVSBAVABS #god fucking dammit i’m pissed that i can’t get myself to focus on anything else #because i wanna write #but i just. don’t care rn.#and i just think about cod. and other video games.#i’m still stuck on ff7 and i:ss and h:fw so like #blegh #anyways if y’all wanna talk about soap mara or seleste—#JDHSHSBSBANABABSB #mobile.

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angelyuji · 12 days

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heyy guyss... how y'all doing.... anyway here are some elias thoughts sorry if these are ooc... i havent listened to tma in a month and im on episode 161...

tw // spoilers for tma, creepy boss bouchard, nothing too crazy actually which is new for me lol

im watching smallville and catching up on another podcast and also taking 3 summer classes.... what if i kms guys... jk ;)

also hey babe this is for u @soupyboiii

the only way to meet elias is if you work at the archives. so the very first time you meet him is at your job interview. he's not creepy in a pervy sort of way but creepy in a... horror movie kinda way lol you felt like he was staring into your soul but he was hot so you forgave him.

you sit patiently, waiting to be called. you needed the job, with your savings account running low and your degree being of no use, you’d be willing to get on your knees and beg for a job. ‘if im gonna beg, i hope he’s hot at least.’

“(y/n) (l/n)?” you look up to see him. ‘oh fuck, he is hot’ he tilts his head at you and you jump up.

“hi! mr. bouchard, right?” you reach out your hand to shake and he takes it. his hand was cold and you felt a chill go down your spine. he doesn’t move, keeping your hand in place. you feel an uncomfortable prickling on the back of your neck.

“follow me.” he smiles and lets go of your hand. you follow into his office. he gestures to a chair in front of his desk. once you were both settled in, he looks over your file and gives you a once-over. “what made you want to work here?”

‘crushing loans’ “honestly, i’ve always wanted to work at a library! it’s very peaceful and i love to be surrounded by books, so when i saw the job listing, i knew i had to apply.” you smile.

he hums, “would you want to work with people or be down in the archives?”

you pause to think, ‘i’d rather work with people than a dingy basement, i guess…’ “i’d rather work with people. i’ve had a lot of-”

he interrupts you, “i’m glad to hear. do you have any other questions?”

‘are you married? do you date younger people?’ “i can’t think of anything right now.” you smile and shrug, sheepishly. he gives you an unnerving smile and you can feel your smile falter.

“you’re perfect.”

you rarely see him after that interview and the few times you do see him, it'll be glimpses of him leaving his office to meet the archival team or back.

in my mind, the day that like really sets him forward on persuing you would be like a one-on-one performance review or smth like that (im definitely not taking this from a fanfic i started and never finished or posted)

he listens to you talk about how much you love the job and get into your head to actually see what you mean... and what you mean is "i wanna fuck this guy". that piques his interest so he asks you the million dollar question.

"would you like to work in the archives? i think they could really use your skills down there." elias stares you down.

"sorry, what?" you were surprised at the offer. you hadn't said anything about wanting to work there, happy and content with your currect position and paycheck.

"of course, you would get a raise and a couple of other benefits, but i would love to work more closely with you (y/n)." he stands and moves in front of his desk, leaning against the table.

'more... closely....' your thoughts run wild as you feel heat creep up your cheeks. "i'm not sure how i could help, mr. bouchard." you wring your hands in your lap. elias leans down to grab your hands, softly. you feel his breath on your neck as he leans to whisper in your ear.

"please, love, call me elias."

need him!!!!

he kinda reminds me of william afton like when i think of boss willy i think of elias

except boss willy afton creep factor leans more to pervert while elias creep factor leans more into mysterious boss who also raises the hair on the back of your neck yk? iykyk as they say

anyway thats all i can think of rn bye :)

#like and reblog <3 #elias bouchard x reader #x reader #yandere x reader #gender neutral reader #elias bouchard #the magnus archives #tma fanfic #tma imagine #elias bouchard tma #yandere elias bouchard #creepy boss #not really yandere ig cuz i didn't lean into it #idk this wasnt as freaky as i wanted it to be #didnt really get to the meat of it as they say #gonna write mystic messenger stuff soon tho cuz im finishing up getting all of jumins route rn #tma x reader

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icarus-star · 8 months

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im feeling so very conflicted rn

#and somewhat angry with myself 🤷🏻‍♂️#no more liking rory. right?#and i cant like. stop myself from hyperfixating on him?? like if i could stop i would #i see a buncha ppl leaving the fanbase cuz the recent stuff #and i feel kinda like a bad person for not doing so as well #and if it comes out that he DID in fact cheat on sarah #and im still as hyperfixated on him as now and before #im gonna feel so terrible #and i feel really bad about still writing tons of fics rn. especially cuz ive actually been motivated #especially cuz #ive been so motivated #rory culkin #intruders 2015 #jack goes home #☆arties diary

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mimir97477906 · 2 months

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im so sosry for ranting abour this again but auhgufhgh im making a ref sheet of my ocs for myself beacse EVERYTIME I DRAW THEM THEY LOOK SOOOSK DIFFERENT os i thoguht maybe this can help me memorize their faces but EVEN THO IM USING GUIDELINES THE SAME CHARACTER LOOKS LIKE DIFFERENT PEOPLE ITS JUST A HEAD TURN AROUND I CANT DO THIS I FEEL SO VIOLENT WHY IS MY ART STYLE HAVING AN IDENTITY CRISIS HOWWWWWWW DO I FIX THIS

#everytime when im drawing any of my ocs and someone mixes them up with another oc my heart shatters to 7463874693 pieces #that either means everyone i draw looks the same or the same oc i draw looks so different every time #at that point they just went with whoever they think is the closest #im having the hardest time making my sentences right now what is going on my talkşng abilites have went down to zero #no like also ive always struggled w same face syndrome without realising #all my art life i had ocs that looked exactly the same from an outsiders view but they looked sososooo different to me #like i just erased my ocs frrom existence when i was 12 cuz everyone mixed them up and it frustrated me so bad #and i look back at that era AND THEY REALLY ARE EXACTLY THE SAME I CANT TELL WHO IS WHO #AND THIS KEPT HAPPENING until i got into sims which pushed me to egt out of my comfort zone #this is why its very important to be obsessed with the ugliest character u can find ^_^(NERVOUS SUBJECT)#and now im scared i once again convinced myslef that my ocs look very different when they actually arent #ok maybe this is a transitional period from having a same face syndrome to being able depict different kinds of people #and im in between rn cuz since im nnot used to this i just cant draw the same face again #and everytime i draw it loks like a dfifferent stuyle whatfevrrrr whatevr #wow writing down your feelings really do work maybe i should get a journal #ramblings

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mumpsetc · 1 year

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I Think the Era of ii Being the Second Biggest Object Show Is Kind of Over... It Does Just Feel Like Its Just Getting By on Name Recognition Now

#Like Cfmot 2 Came Out On the Same Day as iii 12 and Its Sitting At Around 800k Views Where As Id Be Surprised if iii Has Broken 275k Rn #The Viewership is so Low Theyre Resorting to Taking the Numbers Off the Thumbnails #And Beyond That Im Jusr Seeing So Many People Go 'This Show Doesnt Make Me Happy Anymore'#And Even If S2 Returned Its Been So Long And the Writing Sensibilities Have Changed So Much #That Its Not Gonna Be the Same #But Idk... We Have Plushies Now I Guess. Hurrah #I Know I Bitch and Bitch About ii But It Does Hurt Watching It Dig Itself Into a Big Miserable Hole #This Show Got Me Into Object Shows and Now I Cant Even Really Muster Up Enjoyment OR Anger for It #Just Detached Apathy #Im Gonna Be Watching Still Cuz I Have To But At This Point If ii is Nothing to You Just Stop #Dont Give Em Your Views Dont Give Em Your Money #Fucking Whatever Man #ii Negavitity #HARDCORE TOO DAMN This is Doomerish #dreamy.txt #Objective Criticism

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that-sarcastic-writer · 3 months

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Somebody please PLEASE tell me not to write some (marquis) Vincent de gramont spice. I DO NOT need to go down a bill skarsgard rabbit hole again. Somebody change my mind right now.

#i am down so bad for him rn #was rewatching john wick 4 and that accent😩#THEM SUITS #his indifference towards violence #im so weak #i really want to write fir him cuz theres not enough #someone tell me not to pls #vincent de gramont #marquis de gramont #john wick chapter 4 #bill skarsgård

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aria0fgold · 16 days

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Also Alec and Ray's supposed "theme songs" are just songs I played which resulted or aided in the creation of them cuz honestly Alec's one DOESN'T FIT HIM AT ALL! But alas... it is the song that started it all, so... Until I find one that Actually Fits, he's stuck with his creation song as his theme song.

#aria rants #ariaoc #its ''look at me now'' by charlie puth btw. alecs creation song. specifically it was... an amv of inuyasha to that song #i watched that video YEEAAARRS! ago. like at least i was around 13-16 smth. and ever since then alec has gotten major #rewrites that the song doesnt even apply to him anymore now. but it was the beginning of it all so it just stays anyway #for ray its ''make it up'' by sam tsui. not really a creation song cuz i alrdy had ray made when i found it but it DID help #with writing the initial drafts of rays personality and everything and it still Somewhat applies to him so it stays too #mel has one as well! its ''broken'' by william black and fairlane and this is actually fits him cuz i found the song AFTER #i was pretty done and satisfied with his newer drafts and the song helped put mel into perspective a bit #so yea hes the only one with a theme song that actually fully fits him. well-- rays one fits him too but i feel like i could #find one that fits a lil more than the one he has rn but alas! hes gonna wait for years cuz im bad at finding songs

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hecksupremechips · 1 month

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Fucked up how happy I get whenever I make content of Shinjiro Aragaki being actually loved and getting to heal and learning to love the little things in life and getting to express himself. What’s up with that

#persona #shinjiro aragaki #hes the only one i really respect here #its like so annoying though that i even care like whats wrong with me why does this bother me so much #just cuz i see myself in this character and also feel like shit and idk when he doesnt even get to live doesnt get to recover #and this is treated as a good game with a profound theme and this is treated as good writing #its hard not to be hurt when its like. im barely hanging on man #and youre telling me he can be saved by someone noticing him and caring about him and he can get through it and be loved and try to heal #but this is treated as some sorta disservice to the narrative and that you cant have the theme work this way #its like. but this is the only way i can even feel anything about this theme this actually makes me wanna try #seeing the character going through mental issues like mine die just like. it makes things suck idk #and its like why do i even care like this shouldnt matter but idk its like #if he can make it then why cant i #and im just really attached to this and i really really want to make my fic of him exist cuz. nothing is going good for me rn #but if i can make this one thing thats important to me where someone gets to recover then maybe ill feel less helpless #its what im trying to tell myself so i can stop feeling like im. idk cringe or something cuz im emotionally attached to a fictional #character and the wellbeing of this character feels like motivation for me #i just wish i wasnt so damn desperate about it 😩#anyway can someone please slap me with a fish so i can stop being insecure about my writing and just fucking do it

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bakerymanslaughter · 5 months

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dude i read your Wilson x reader one shot on AO3 (like twice or thrice already haha...) and it has been stuck in my head ahhhakfkscjs it's so good and my brain is rotting with DS again 😭😭😭

THANK YOU, take a 2 minute sketch of them,,,

#im hyperfixated on 1 piece and submas and stardew rn mostly #gonna try no return mode on tlou part 2 remastered soon cuz mmmm rogue likes and joel #but i really should get back into dst #anon #ask #don't starve #i wish ppl would write him as a lil asshole more

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angelyuji · 1 year

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trust

harleen quinzel x gn!reader

“are you sure this is a good idea?” you trail behind dr. quinzel. her fast steps rush into her office and she quickly shuts the door behind you.

“what do you mean?” she asks, playing innocent.

“don’t play dumb, doctor. are you sure it’s a good idea to trust the jo-” her eyes sharpen, and you stop yourself, “sorry, patient j.” she sighs, eyes softening. you watch as she almost collapses back into her chair.

“i don’t know, sweetheart. i really don’t.” she rests her elbows on her desk and buries her face in her hands.

“then, maybe call this off? if you don’t know if it’s a good idea…” you kneel next to her, stress pumping through your veins. the last thing you want is for your favorite coworker to go to prison for some lunatic.

“i know, it’s just…” she trails off, “all i know is that my dad needs the surgery to live, and we need money for the surgery. i can’t- i won’t lose my dad, (y/n).” dr. quinzel lifts her head and you see tears start to fall from her eyes. you pull her into a hug and she softly sobs into your shoulder.

“i’m sorry… i didn’t know you were having such a hard time.” you say, feeling tears roll down your face. you feel your heart tighten, knowing there wasn’t much you can do.

she lifts her head and wipes her tears, waving your worry off, “it’s okay, i never told you. what could you do? you make less than me, how could i ask you for money?” she sniffles before laughing softly, looking at the wet spot on your shoulder. silence fills the room and the gravity of the situation weighs on both of you. “you… you won’t tell anyone, right? you’ll keep it between us?” you look into her eyes and your heart beats faster.

“of course, i won’t tell anyone. your secret is safe with me.” you smile and dr. quinzel places a hand on your face, her eyes trail to your lips. you swallow. “it’s just… you’ll be careful, right? patient j isn’t a good person. he’s hurt a lot of people and… i don’t want you to be next, you know?” the warmth of her hand leaves your face as she turns away.

she sighs, “i know. honestly, i’m a little scared too, but i’ll be careful.” she turns back to you with a bright smile, “do you trust me?”

“always.” you grab your clipboard and get up.

“alrighty then, sweetheart, let’s get moving. we have patients to help.” she bumps her hip with yours. you both leave the office, unknowing of what’s to come.

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ask-knowledgekeepers · 2 years

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(( Klaus was angry so I shoved him into a Lucario hoodie... It's fair to say he's still angry but he feels better now.

#drawing #klaus opus #just some filler art #hope yall like silly drawings cuz thats what your gonna get till im done making stuff #too tired to use illusion? I got u klaus #boom lucario hoodie #i wish this was canon he would actually love it #its gets really exhausting having his illusion up 24/7 #what does he actually do when he cant use illusion in story?#he just hides #he cant do that in story rn tho cause... well #he's outside and avoiding his teammates like the plauge but normally yes #..... *casually writes note to make it canon later*

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sidereon-spaceace · 4 months

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I love when a character wears a long skirt or robes but then as they walk you get a peek of leg and you can see full plate-armor greaves. It's like lingerie to me

#ramblings #im sketching different outfits for Eisel rn and realising this concept really works best in motion #which is good cuz i chose writing as my medium so i can properly describe it

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cinnamon-notes · 4 months

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i can't sleep :c

#and i think it's because i kinda have a lot on my plate rn #and lately i've gotten back into journaling- which is something im really proud of- cuz you know when i was with my ex i could never have my #own privacy so i had to give up journaling- which is something i had been doing nonstop since i was five and i could barely write #grammatically correct sentences- and im happy that im eventually journaling again- i really am- but this means that i do not know how to #handle my feelings unless i write- and today i was too depressed to write #cuz stuff happened at work as it usually does and im almost on my period and my PMS is killing me #then this man decided to tell me im incapable of loving and i will never find someone to love me back and that im a bad person and that im #uncaring and this hurt so much although i knew he was teasing- it still hurt!#then this other guy said im unreliable cuz i didn't show up for a task that was even optional and i had never 100% agreed on before #and i didn't show up because: depression + pms getting worse + had to figure out some bureaucratic shit that was pivotal and urgent #i talked to the moon this morning #that conversation we had (yeah i believe she replied) was the most meaningful thing of the day #so rn im just focusing on replaying it in my head because it was sweet and it was cathartic and i wanna do that tomorrow again #so im looking forward to it #while stupid voices in my head keep telling me that man is right and i AM a bad person who can't love and cant be loved #while stupid voices in my head tell me people are better off without me #ugh- i really cannot sleep- i have a lot of anxiety #and i hate that the most of it is caused by that stupid man i really hate that man #cinnamon darkness

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cowboy-robooty · 4 months

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physically holding back my rage when i go get my weekly uchuujin no kakushigoto update and see people bitchin and moaning about it. I WANT TO HURT YOU AND IM NOT FUCKING AROUND. YOU SHOULD HAVE BEAR MACE SPRAYED IN YOUR EYES SINCE YOU OBVIOUSLY HAVE NO FUCKING APPRECIATION FOR GOOD LITERATURE. S2G SHUT YOUR DUMBASS UP BEFORE I GO AHEAD AND SLICE OFF ALL YOUR FINGER TIPS TOO AND PUT YOUR TONGUE IN A BAG CORPSE PARTY STYLE CUZ YOUR OPINIONS ARE ACTIVELY MAKING SOCIETY WORSE.

#i will make a review for uchuujin no kakushigoto later... bc rn i want to see more how the story plays out to see if it gets even better or #if it falls from grace #rn tho im so hooked like every week i need my update its what i look forward to ngl #the manga is soooo good i adore it from the artstyle to the characters to the romance to the message #i love the pyschological aspects so far and think its been interweved nicely if not a little too in your face but its being done p well #i cant wait to see how the author handles the main theme rn of exploring the selfishness in helping people #so many people keep saying its 'so weird' and 'keeps getting more fucked up with each chapter'#AND I DONT GET IT #ITS NOT WEIRD IMO ITS NOT A BIZARRE STORY #ITS A GOOD STORY AND I THINK EVERYTHING MAKES PERFECT SENSE LIKE TBH #IM SURPRISED WE HAVENT SEEN AN ALIEN ROMANCE STORY LIKE THIS YET #THIS IS AN UNTAPPED MARKET THATS LIKE UH DUHH!! WHY DIDNT I THINK OF DOINF THAT FIRST?!?#IDK LIKE I DONT THINK ITS WEIRD I THINK THE AUTHOR IS MAKING VERY NORMAL DECISIONS TO PROGRESS THE STORY #you wanna read weird go read fuckin #KAMI NO KODOMO #I HAD TO FIGHT FOR MY LIFE ON BAKAMANGA TO FIND THIS AGAIN #i should write a review for it. its interesting #not really a fan cuz it just doesnt hit for me but its interesting and unique

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meat-pvppet · 7 months

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im gonna fucking explode dude how do you write compelling monster species bullshit

#dry heaving rn every time i wanna try figuring this out #yes this is for lucius' story #yes this is because of an old story i made years ago that im still clinging to with my dear life #i cant decide if it would be more interesting if these fuckers were like #man made or naturally occuring #cuz if theyre man made they can build up for some sick confrontation n stuff and i can write more about how lucius' involvement #dw hes not the big bad or anything he just stuck his nose places he shouldnt have #hence the accident #anyway the problem there is it would become really convoluted really quickly if im not carefully #and im not usually carefully #i like to throw things against walls and hoping it would stick #then refining what stuck #so #yeaj #if they were naturally occurring it would be an easy out but the big problem comes up: the biology of everything else in this world #bro im already suffering in my current biology class i cant handle making up fictional and theoretical adaptations of regular animals to #explain how theyre still alive despite the monsters of the world #“oh but vinnie! you can make the monsters only target humans!”#we dont give humans enough credit for how smart we are #we would probably quickly adapt to smth like that #if they would adapt and evolve just as quickly then that would be concerning but it may get too convoluted #again #secret third thing: base them on folk lore and make them into evolved versions of them #a little easier to figure stuff out cuz theres already writings about them #however id still have the same problem as if they were just naturally occuring #i might be thinking about this all too much #but this is just how i am with world building #i want everything to make sense and have a reason and to be as #“realistic”#ig

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discotenny · 8 months

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I swear not to bash other writers but so many yandere things I see are just like, oh a scene about y/n being tied up and told all their loved ones are gonna die and to stay with them forever yadda yadda... you just set down a whole ass concept for that il doc one and I love it

I think there’s an audience for any work, esp when it comes to something as deep as yanderes 🤔 I know some people really enjoy kidnapping scenarios and I would like to play around with the concept too tbh tbh. I think there’s some yan charas that would absolutely go for kidnapping (TWST Mal and a lot of the TokyoRev cast comes to mind LOL. For hypmic im not sure but my mind says Jyuto for sm reason. Maybe it’s the handcuffs AKDBDKD) but it’s not what I usually search for when I look up yandere fics.

My personal taste when it comes to yanderes is the more behind the scenes manipulative type? Two faced people who have that one object of affection in their life its just kenjjdjdnmdmkk YUMMYMYT. Charas like Ramu and Akechi already make my heart flutter normally but throw in an almost unhinged obsession into the mix? Be still my fleeting heart woe is me

That’s not to say I necessarily prefer the overly pleasing types, where they act ultra submissive despite being mega dangerous. I love the composed yet still domineering types who always have an air of danger to them that they won’t hesitate to show. Think p5’s Akiren or Hypmic’s Jakurai.

I also love delusional charas oh my gododorntndondkdndk. Mnsmdndkndkjcic. Msmskdndkneowiaosndksndoxbxobnwmwlj. I can’t phrase my thoughts on this correctly but it plays into my love of angst it’s so good soo good

#discodark #asks are fun uwu #I got this really good yandere kuko ask and it’s giving my the itch to write rn #holding myself back for tmrw cuz I gotta SL EE P THO 😝😝😝#aside from that Im also working on a yan Akechi and AkiRen request #bleeeeh 😝😝😝

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