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my-tin-can-mans · 3 years

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Time to Yourselves (Captain Rex x Reader)

warnings: oh boy there are none but this is tooth rotting fluff ya'll i couldn't help myself with this soft boy, he deserves so much love.

PSA: I know a lot of people are expecting a Part two to the Crosshair Fic i posted awhile back but some unexpected work came up and it might be awhile before I get a chance to actually sit down and write it sorry:/ i will tag everyone thats asked to be tagged in it tho!

But for now enjoy the fluff that is this! I need to write a good fluff fic.

When the ship had finally landed on Coruscant you heaved a sigh of relief. The 501st had just finished a gruesome battle which meant as a medic you had spent the way back to base in the medical wing bay treating patients aboard the Resolute. You’d seen just about every solider aboard helping them with injuries that ranged from a minor concussion to blaster wounds.

It had been a long couple of days and the one solider you really wanted to see was the one you had yet to have the pleasure of. The doors to the ship opened and you walked out, now that the battalion was on world, you would hand over your patients to the nurses that worked here instead while you got some much-needed time off like the rest of the 501st. You met up with the head medics on ground and passed off your paperwork filling them in on the more important injuries you happened to come across while working so they were prepared.

Once you had finished up with the medical bay you went off to look for the man you hadn’t seen in days. While it upset you that you hadn’t been able to speak a word to you, it also comforted you in knowing that he hadn’t shown up in the medical bay at any point in time which meant he was better off than most of the men on board at the time. You were busy enough as it was, and he probably was too trying to write up reports on what all had gone down.

You walked back towards the landing hanger knowing him and the general usually lingered around to talk before they went their separate ways for the remainder of their time off. Sure enough there you spotted him, the back of his buzzed cut blonde hair, bucket it hand placed on his hip, talking it up with General Skywalker. Skywalker caught you walking towards them and focused his gaze on you, making Rex finally turn around to look at you.

It had felt like forever since you had seen his face. His gaze immediately softened upon seeing you. You finished the brief couple of steps you had left and planted yourself right at his side. “Captain Rex, General Skywalker.” They both nodded at you, a hint of a smirk showing on Skywalker's face.

Relationships were forbidden within the GAR and certainly that of a clone trooper. They were meant as property and therefore weren’t allowed the same free will as others. But after a while you and Rex couldn’t stay away from each other. Your relationship remained a secret but that didn’t stop the rumors from going around the 501st. Most of the men actually encouraged you two to get together but to play it safe, you and Rex hadn’t officially mentioned it to anyone.

At this point you were sure Anakin knew though. Rex would deny telling you he spilled his guts to him, but they were close and recently the General had been giving you smug glances whenever he laid eyes on you. If Rex trusted him though, you guess you would have to as well. Rex was a smart man; he knew what he was doing.

You turned to the general and spoke, “Do you mind if I steal your Captain for a few words?”

“He’s all yours.” He winked at Rex which made you narrow your eyes at the both of them causing Rex to blush and rub the back of his neck, something he had a habit of doing when he was uncomfortable or nervous.

The General turned and started to walk away, once he was far enough out of hearing range you scanned to make sure no one else would be able to hear you before whispering, “Alright that’s it Captain he definitely knows something so you might as well spill your guts to me about spilling your guts to him,” you told him while crossing your arms.

“Okay fine I told him I’m sorry but General Skywalker is the one person I can always trust beside you. He wouldn’t tell a soul. And besides if he did I’d have some pretty rough dirt on him.” The last part he said under his breath and you were sure you weren’t supposed to hear it, hell it didn’t even make sense so you just brushed it off. He looked back up to you, “is that what you came here to talk to me about?”

You sighed and softened. “No, I just missed you.”

“I missed you too.” He went to raise a hand to your face but retreated it when he realized where you two still were, looking around to see if anyone had caught one. Fortunately, everyone else was either gone or fully immersed in whatever they were doing to care.

“How many days did the General say we had off?” you questioned. Rex was always the first of the men to know how long they’d be staying on world for.

“Not long, none of our ships have been fatally damaged and there were only a few serious injuries, so we have the rest of today and tomorrow, were stationed to be back on board at 2100 tomorrow night.”

You hummed in response. This didn’t warrant enough time for the two of you to settle on world for a while, but you didn’t take kindly to spending another night in the barracks.

“What have you got on that mind of yours?” Rex asked while raising an eyebrow in your direction.

“Well, I was just thinking about how I missed you, and we haven’t been able to spend some time together in a while...” you trailed off, pondering on your descions.

“Yes”

“And I've been saving up some credits for a while now, with nothing to spend it on…” you trailed off again making him raise his eyebrow at you for the second time in reaction. “And I'm tired of sleeping on that maker awful cot in the barracks.”

“Get to your point” he rolled his eyes amused

“How about we rent a hotel for the night? Just me and you? We’ll finally get some alone time.”

“You’ve already decided on this didn’t you?”

“I’ve missed you Rex, I just want some alone time where we don’t have to hide our relationship.”

He sighed. “I know cyar'ika, I know. Tell you what, I've got a few things I need to finish up here, but send me the location of the hotel and I’ll meet you there.”

“Okay” excitement started to bubble up in your stomach, finally a night in a warm comfy bed, with a fresher that had decent water pressure and Rex all to yourself.

Rex turned his head, looking around to make sure no one was paying attention before he leaned in and gave you a quick kiss. When he pulled away he winked at you and just like that he turned around and was walking off.

****

You’d decided to splurge on the hotel. You had plenty of credits, working as a medic in the GAR didn’t pay well but then again when did you ever have the time to spend it?

The hotel room was a dark blue, one side of the wall, opposite to the door was covered in glass windows, ceiling to floor with sheer ivory drapes hung throughout.

The bed was placed against the wall between the two doors, where Rex was currently fast asleep and had been from some time now.

You on the other hand stood beside one of the large drapes watching the late traffic speed by. After the events of the night occurred, Rex had fallen asleep peacefully but you were still restless. He had spent days on the battlefield while you simply cared for the couple of people still stuck in the med bay from the previous battle.

You let out a sigh, the lights of Coruscant were very entrancing, so much so that you hadn’t realized Rex had awoken from his sleep and groggily made his way over to you till his arm was wrapping around your waist and his head was leaning on your shoulder.

When you initially got up from bed, you put on your underwear and the top of Rex’s blacks, not finding your shirt, where ever it had landed when he first arrived, in the low-lit room. The shirt hung just below your waist and Rex took this as an opportunity to slide his hand up it. After behind touch starved for so long, he took every opportunity he could to feel skin on skin contact with you, and you certainly weren’t complaining.

He kissed your neck once and his thumb rubbed circles over your hip. “Come back to bed”

“mmmm convince me,” you smirked.

His grip on your waist tightened and he brought his other arm around to wrap around you as well and pull you closer to him, he placed a trail on slow, lazy kisses on your neck while he hummed, “please.”

“Ok, but only since you asked so nicely,” his grip on you loosened and you turned in his arms to look at him.

Sleep covered his face, he must not have gotten much on the way back here you thought. Skywalker’s battles seemed to cause a lot of paperwork.

You pecked him once on the lips and let him lead you back to bed. When you got under the covers and situated Rex came in behind you. But instead of lying beside you he decided to lay himself directly on top of you.

“What is this?” you chucked as he nuzzled his face into the crook of your neck.

“Don’t want you getting away from me this time,” he mumbled.

“I don’t really have a choice now do I?”

“Good, I sleep better with you.”

Hearing those words hurt a little. You let out a sigh and brought your hand up to rub his scalp at the top of his neck. He hummed into you. You and Rex barely got any alone time together, only a few nights like these out of a month were spent sleeping in each other’s arms, and to know most of the time he just didn’t sleep as well was hard to hear. Your mind stuck on the thought for a while but came to the conclusion that it was a useless debate, he was fighting a war, it was far more important than the two of you. Your mind slowly started to drift back to sleep.

#captain rex #captain rex x reader #star wars x reader #star wars #star wars the clone wars #Rex #ct 7567 #rex x reader #rex x you #captain rex x you #captain rex x y/n #the clone wars #the clone wars fic #star wars fanfic #im not good at tags so lets hope i got them all #whew

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gwynpool · 3 years

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it’s 2AM and i just finished Rule of Wolves (spoilers definitely up ahead)

first, to inform everyone, i read the spoilers when it got leaked in twitter cuz i can’t help myself. (it’s a sickness, i know) i think this is important since it definitely influenced my perspective upon reading the book. also, this is my first time being early in a party so yay me! going in ROW was easy for me because i started King of Scars the day before book 2’s actual release date so everything’s fresh.

secondly, this is really long so i’m sorry. i just have a lot of feelings and need to write it all down. on with the rant.

King of Scars was wonderful to me since it gave me my favorite Shadow and Bone character and the girl who i used to hate for being a mean girl but who I now admire with every ounce of my being. It also introduced a new ship that I am now obsessed with and is ruling besides my love for Jude&Cardan. Not to mention, it gave us Nina, whom though i’m not entirely a fan of due to all my love focusing on Kaz and Inej, allowed the connection between Shadow&Bone with SixofCrows.

Moving on, ROW was a ride and whirlwind of emotions. unfortunately, it wasn’t always the best kind.

I love the fantasy elements of it (tho it was a huge leap especially with the saints power thingy) and the politics because i am a sucker for scheming and stealing thrones.

the zoyalai teasing and angst was painful but in the best way since slowburn is what keeps me going.

nina finding comfort (and attraction, apparently) from hanne made my heart flutter because i haven’t gotten over matthias but this allowed a sort of closure and next chapter for our waffle-loving queen.

the promised wedding by leigh wasn’t what i expected but i’m not complaining since david&genya deserved nothing but happiness.

almost everything seems going well (aside from the fact that aleksander was ressurected apparently)and then everything crashes and burns and i just have to wonder why?

so the promised funeral alongside the wedding one, immediately comes after two? three? chapters as they were attacked during the afterparty of the wedding. and guess what? leigh killed the fcking groom.

the thing is i already knew he was going to die (with the spoilers and all) but i did not expect it to come immediately after the freaking wedding. not even halfway through the book!

being spoiled, i think, took most of the pain from the event but it doesn’t lessen the fact that it was completely unnecessary??? like though the characters grieved, nothing much was affected from his death? also, don’t talk to me about the character development for the survivors from this tragic event because there. was. absolutely. NONE.

and then we have the fricking darling ressurected. i love him in the first book of the grishaverse though i knew he was still a villain, don’t get me wrong. and my heart ached but was also relieved with his death in the third. he also inspired one of my all-time favorite fantasy villain(antihero?) in the form of Adelina Amouteru in the Young Elites series.

Ceased to be a Darklina fan and am now shipping Aleksander with Adelina because their power tho? like clings to like and they are both imbued with unfathomable darkness. somebody write fics please.

but bringing him back was what for exactly? leigh bardugo preached on how toxic the darkling character was and how we really shouldn’t like him in terms of agreeing with his ideals and yada yada. and yet she brings him back because apparently, he’s the only one paying her bills.

his conversation with alina tho had me expecting some darklina crumbs with fan service on the side since the stans were all raving about it on twitter *vomiting noises from toxicity* but i was surprised since it just further reminded us of how he truly is a villain in his very core and would do anything to get what he wants. so all in all it wasn’t entirely awful and it actually made me like Mal a bit. (never was a fan of him but that’s my issue, not the character’s)

setting aside the darkling issue a bit, the POV from Mayu was skippable. i mean obviously it still needs to be read for the Shu politics and the khergud existence but it just made me want to go to the next pov. Same goes for the “the monk’s” POV since you all know how i feel about him and the cult with it’s assembly and shit ended up also being unnecessary towards the end. honestly, i could do without the journey of the starless saint and his cult.

i truly enjoyed the fjerdan plot to my surprise and i like how nina kind of went through the last of us 2 circle of hate journey. it was definitely difficult knowing her pain and all that she went through and still choosing to be the better person. and yet, i can’t help but be more proud of her development. also, the supposed death of hanne got me going for a second and was actually ready to storm leigh’s home to fix her mistake. thank god it was plot twist. that’s all i have to say on the nina POV because i don’t wanna ruin my good feeling on this.

the crows cameo gave us a mini heist and it just made me miss reading their adventures. also the suli scene tugged at my heart.

imma skip zoya’s transformation but it utterly made me feel amazing and i have never been more glad that she’s kind of overpowered. she deserves it so fck all them haters. you can choke.

nikolai’s revelation and decision for the ravkan throne was not all that surprising, even without my knowledge of the spoilers. i honestly had a feeling that he was always his best self when he was strumhond and he only chose to fulfill the duties of the king because at that time, there was no other choice. so him giving up the throne to his beloved soldier, summoner and saint was a quite satisfying choice of route. there has been some others who would contest nikolai’s decision to step down as something unnecessary in the grand scheme of things but i would stand by my belief that nikolai made the best choice for ravka and for himself. not to say that i didn’t want to see both the queen and king side by side ruling but what are fanfictions for?

zoyalai is canon and endgame. finally. i can die now.

now the last two chapters was a toss up. for the first one was the darkling’s sacrifice. okay, so i was also spoiled by this from twitter but when i was reading the book, i keep expecting it to be brought up and it wasn’t. so i honestly thought that maybe that spoiler was a prank. lo and behold it was not and it wasn’t until the very last end. so the buildup was goddamn awful. the whole concept of the thorn wood and sort of atlas moment was just no. like you’re just springing this up now? when we’re supposed to be tying up loose ends but making sure it had history and buildup to well, back it up.

also leigh outright writing genya saying it was not a redemption for the darkling and him being unapologetic about his crimes (basically being a truly evil asshole) doesn’t remove the fact that it still comes off as a redemption arc especially with what is now the synopsis of SOC 3 but ill get to that. he still was the one who did a heroic deed and that fucks me up because it was just devastating to me after making peace with his end in ruin and rising. not because i was hurt that he died yet again boohoo but because it kind of invalidates everything that alina, genya, zoya and countless other victims went through.

on a side note, the darling stans on twitter who keeps defending his actions, i would really advise you to reflect on your decisions cuz it is honestly unhealthy. also, you lot talking smack about nikolai and zoya refusing to sacrifice their lives? stop twisting the story to suit your toxic admiration, nikolai was even first to offer up his life and would do so if it was actually possible. so just go hide in your darkling cocoon and stop hating on other characters to justify your favored aleksander.

the very last chapter aka coronation was good because it gave us inej ghafa cameo as captain of her ship and bonding with our resident privateer and also genya, alina and zoya bonding. but it was bad because apparently the darkling chronicles is still not over and now we’re supposed to grant him death like that’s going to make everything okay? i know forgiveness and breaking the circle of hate and revenge is a huge theme in this duology but honestly, this is just too extreme. with nina it was understandable and the people she hated were born of twisted mindset and circumstances but the darkling? hahahah no. he is a literal immortal who was delusional so now that he’s paying for his crimes, you want to allow him death because you have nightmares? zoya, goddamit no! same to you genya and alina. and so this will be the plot for the third six of crows? why can’t we just stop making this about him. now he gunna steal kaz’s thunder? over my dead body.

in the end, i gave this book 4 stars in goodreads because if i ignore the darkling plot, it was a really good use of politics and fantasy merging in a storyline. i can’t fault leigh for choosing to do this since it’s still her book so i definitely don’t have a right to dictate what i expected from this. also, i have a half a mind to believe that she fell in love with ben barnes and had him in mind writing this so i really cannot blame her because i have been under that man’s charms since prince caspian came out. the spoilers i read made me more open in reading this (backwards thinking but eh that’s how i roll) so i’m not at all crushed by what transpired. it was just weird and was lackluster in its attempt to give ravka some sort of peace. frankly, i just want to read the third six of crows book to maybe find some sort of calm in all this craziness and also delve in some zoyalai fanfiction because it was a long time coming.

shameless promotion but if you guys want to check out my nikolai duology spotify playlist, here’s the link:

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genshin-obsessed · 3 years

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I'm doing alright! School's stressful tho so that's always fun! I'm taking a few math classes, history, Spanish (which I can't formulate a sentence in, but I can translate! Sort of), an advanced English course, and a seminar for like presentations and group work (in which we have to record out answers to some assignments ON VIDEO, which is....not fun. Though I suppose I've brought it upon myself, so I guess I can't really complain). It hasn't been too much work yet, but this is just the beginning. Now that I suddenly think about it, I think I might try to get an angst piece out for October, I haven't really posted anything in a while on my acc, but it's not too active with people seeing my stuff either since it's still a decently new acc. Anyway, glad you're doing better, even if it's just a bit! Don't forget to eat food and get some sleep and do your work at a good pace!

- resolve (人*´∀｀)｡*ﾟ+

School is always stressful like 😭 ugh I hate it but I gotta attend😔 ooh o: those don’t sound too bad, although I’m terrible at math and I’ll take it just to improve. Cuz my level of horrible math just can’t exist. I have to improve lol

Oh god those video assignments ;-; my Psych class allows video submissions instead of written document but NO THANK YOU. I’ll uh I’ll write it out :’)

Ooh angst for October! That sounds exciting! If you do post it, will you tag me?? I’d be excited to read it. I’m thinking about doing something for Halloween as well cuz I LOVE, LOVE Halloween 🥺👉🏼👈🏼

Thank you, I do feel a bit better now too. Yesterday and on Tuesday I had a really bad headache. They just suck >,< I hate headaches BUT! Don’t worry! I’m eating and drinking lots of water 💖

#🌸─ pocket tries #⊱ ─ resolve #🥺💖💖

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literaphobe · 4 years

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tell us the midsummer night’s dream story!!!

oh boy!! ok so some backstory, midsummer night’s dream production happened when i was 14, it was my second year in secondary school (think of it as high school but ages 13-16 instead of 14/15-17/18) AND it was for like... a national competition (where u could be awarded gold, silver or bronze)

the competition was a biannual thing, and in my school, there used to be a rule where year 1 students weren’t allowed to act. it was a very stupid rule. i hated that rule. anyway, since the competition was every two years, when it wasn’t competition year we would do a normal school production. lucky for me, competition year took place in my second and fourth year (so i got two chances to do it. which is SO funny because i ended up quitting the production in my fourth year. i will tell that story if prompted)

so why am i telling u this? it’s because of the year 3 students (who were like my seniors who only got one chance to act in the competition so this was a big deal to them), and how they.... uh.... reacted. honestly it was quite a number of my seniors in the drama club in general who were pieces of fucking shit. anyway let me explain

we did a modern adaptation of a midsummer night’s dream. i auditioned for the role of hermia (the girl who was loved by two men) and so did several of my seniors. and you know! after the auditions we were chatting and i specifically remember asking a senior “hey what role did you audition for? :D” “hermia!” “oh i hope you get the role!!!!”

i got the role of hermia :) i mean... it did not come as a shock to me. every single role i ever played up to this point was a main character role. and the way our director wrote the script hermia was DEF a main character because of the sheer number of scenes she was in (idk the REAL a midsummer night’s dream ok i wouldn’t go fucking read the OG play or anything),,,,,, and many people were pissed about it

the reason was mostly simple...... jealousy. and like i was the only year 2 student getting cast in such a big role. the other 3 out of the 4 lovers were all year 3 students. and my seniors were pissed and they complained behind my back about how i shouldn’t be allowed to have such a big role because i was only a year 2 student. well, if they were so pissed, hm, maybe they shouldn’t have been so, y’know, untalented? :/ like damn i’m sorry my meat is so huge

and it’s not like i got the role because i was hot or anything. oh no! i was fat and not conventionally attractive in any way, and people brought THAT up to shame me..... including the guy who was supposed to play lysander (YOU KNOW THE GUY WHOS SUPPOSED TO ACT IN LOVE WITH MY CHARACTER)..... he was “having trouble acting” and he was blaming it on ME being “not attractive enough” and i think he might have said something about how i should wear eyeliner or something??? he eventually warmed up to me and said YO ACTING W U IS ACTUALLY REAL FUN but in hindsight??? the fact that he would say shit like that in the first place??? FUCK THAT GUY

anyway, the complaints got so bad that i got KICKED OUT OF MY ROLE AS HERMIA,,,, like bitch that shit BROKE me and my director was like yeah i’m sorry.... but also u still get a role don’t worry!! and she gave me this comic relief role (which wasn’t as big a role but i still got quite a lot of lines!! i felt so bad tho because the girl who had the comic relief role lost it because the director couldn’t stand not having me in the play saying shit) WHICH ACTUALLY ENDED UP BEING SO FUN TO PLAY.... AWAKENED MY LOVE FOR COMIC ACTING PERHAPS.... and like. some skinny conventionally attractive year 4 student became the new hermia :/

BUT BUT BUT GUESS WHAT.... BITCH FUCKING SUCKED.... UNTALENTED AS SHIT..... MY DIRECTOR COULDN’T STAND IT.... and by then people didn’t give a shit anymore about who was playing what.... the disappointment of not being special faded for them i guess? :/ and our director was like ok fuck this shit Michelle will be playing hermia again. and the comic relief role went back to the girl who was playing it before! <3 (i did a better job at it but still <3 it’s ok i liked her she was nice so she deserved the role back <3) and my temporary hermia replacement.... idk she either became part of the ensemble or like backstage crew?

oh the thing that was SO cool and fun about our midsummer night’s dream production was that our principal LOVED theatre so she gave us a SHIT ton of money. our props and set were huge as FUCK and so SO pretty. it all looked real we had an actual staircase and a SWING SET (that we couldn’t swing on for real but it still slapped)

i don’t remember any more drama like i mean i had already proved myself to be most suited for the role? by being the fucking best? anyway on the day of the competition a few things went wrong during other people’s scenes. many of the props were knocked over by some careless actors and parts of the set were messed up too (including the swing set!!!! it got SUPER tangled) so my teacher was freaking out and whispering to me seconds before i ran out on stage (oh yeah it was a competition so our performance was 15 minutes and it had to be TIGHT as hell and there was so little space backstage it was a nightmare) “MICHELLE WHEN YOU GO OUT THERE’S GOING TO BE A LOT OF STUFF MESSED UP IF YOU CAN COULD YOU HELP FIX SOME OF THEM”

and boy oh BOY was the place a mess when i walked on stage to do my scene. fucking don’t know what my idiot cast mates did but it was a MESS mess. but like. whatever, y’know? i just decided that the scene being a mess was how the character stumbled upon it, and i fixed the swing set by pretending my character wanted to play with it. i fixed everything in character. and the last thing i did was put back this huge block that toppled over DURING the blackout it was incredible i fixed EVERYTHING all by MYSELF in record timing even tho the IDIOT SENIOR GUY WHO WAS IN THE SCENE WITH ME TOO DID NOTHING (but like in his ‘defense’ the teacher didn’t ask him to do anything)

my teacher literally cried after the performance and hugged me saying i saved the show and that i did amazingly blah blah blah.... like i guess she didn’t expect me to fix Everything in One Scene while keeping completely in character and not messing up any of my lines or any important blocking etc etc..... i really fixed everyone’s mistakes and made it easier on everyone huh :/

anyway! we got the highest rank which was like gold/distinction! i remember everyone in the drama club running around in school telling each other WE GOT IT WE GOT THE DISTINCTION (something our school had never done before,,,, you know until i came along JFKSKDKD i mean group effort and we got a lot of money that year so,, but still) and i was so cocky i was like “yeah duh of course we got it there’s no way we weren’t getting that” (i mean the competition people posted a picture of our school’s performance on their Twitter!!! they didn’t do that for any other school)

LASTLY the judges sent back their remarks on our performance and they said the girl who was playing hermia was incredible!!! no mention of the other three main characters playing the lovers tho :) oh no :) boo hoo :)

#ask #this is so long sorry

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bluesfm · 4 years

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( park chaeyoung , twenty two , & cisfemale ) who ? these days , it’s all about blue hyong, who comes from los angeles & ca and is making headlines as a singer . she currently has a fan count of 42k , no thanks to the rumors of them being inflexible ! but , on the other hand , their most devout fans say they’re actually imaginative . last i heard , they caused quite a buzz when she publicly dissed her new record label and the misogynistic treatment she was receiving from their reps ! it’s no wonder they remind me of long rants in the notes app being posted to her twitter account , empty bottles of wine laying at recording studios’ floors & notebooks upon notebooks filled with lyrics she might never use but refuses to let go of .

well hello human friends !! n also hello to the non human friends too , wassup . i’m angie a dumb noodle from the middle of the south american jungle , and i’m here to introduce yall to this mess i call blue who’s a muse i have had for yrs now n carry w/ me wherever i go , with some minimal changes but she’s still the same messy bitch on the inside don’t worry folks ! so i will provide u w/ some background info on her n some possible connections under the cut . issa lil messy but we’ve been away for a while pls bear w me

blue is the only daughter to a couple of south korean immigrants that came to america when they were in their very early 20s n already expecting blue in order to chase the american dream n create a better life for themselves n their family . their life was pretty hard for a big part of blue’s childhood , while they were both studying n working odd jobs to pay for their education all the while taking care of a child . so blue didnt have the best childhood , not that her parents were bad or anything they just didnt have time for her . nowadays , they are a lot more comfortable in life , since her dad became a lawyer n her mom is a nurse , but they definitely didnt have an easy beginning .

ok so maybe bc they werent present durant most of her childhood they didnt notice a lol of signs that might have made things a lot easier for them , bc by the time they were available to emotionally be there , during her early teenage years , blue was already kinda a mess . she had grown up w very lil structure n refused the rules they tried to instill on her n was already used to doing things her own way . that lead to a lot of conflict between them , since they expected her to study hard n do well for herself in a nine to fiver when she was already sure art was the only way to go n while she did ok , she definitely wasn’t as good as her parents expected her to be .

so ... u know her teenage yrs were basic girl angsty she fought a lot w her parents n rebelled frequently n ran away from home like ... weekly , but she never rly had any real hardships . life was reasonably good but she always had something to complain abt ... just as she liked

[ MENTAL ILLNESS TW ]

but then she reached her late teens they all realized there was something going on other than the usual teenage angst she displayed all the time when she had her first manic episode . her parents thought it was a “ blue thing “ at first bc she was usually a very impulsive person n she rly didn’t have a habit of thinking before acting on her impulses , but her mom quickly noticed the signs of a manic episode when she realized how aggitated n restless she was , specially when blue described an hallucination she seemed to be having . they took her to a psychiatrist , she was admitted to a hospital n diagnosed w type 1 bipolar disorder n very quickly medicated . while the medication brought her out of her episode , n she was allowed to go home after her mood seemed to stabilize , blue also noticed it stunted her severely emotionally n decided ( against medical n parental advice [ pls dont do it fam !! take ur meds ] ) to quit her medication , falling into her first major depressive episode a few weeks afterwards . n for abt four years she’s been living w her disorder , n she doesn’t medicate at all . she’s super open abt her struggles n she has a Lot of them , specially w how much drugs n alcohol she consumes . i never said she was smart yall .

[ END OF TW ]

ok so as u probably assume , blue is an emotional mess . she has a very chaotic personality , n most of it isnt even from her illness or anything she just is a very chaotic person in general ? she is one of those artsy ppl who forgets to wash her own clothes so she ends up wearing the same dress for like , 3 days . she’s super outspoken n outgoing n rly easy at making friends if u can get past the dumbass energy she exudes 24/7 ? but yes just a very outgoing person n a outright mess most of the time . she is also soooo stubborn u will never get her to change her mind abt smth she believes to be right about in any way . u just cant . she loves a good time n loves partying n is the lack of impulse Queen soo if u got any bad ideas she is the one u should go for if u need any company . also .... so dramatic . she makes a big deal of everything n has 0 apologies abt that . just catch her crying over high school musical 3 or smth like that .

but yea on the bad side tho , blue takes up n gives up on projects so easily n she can be super fickle abt things in general . like , she will defend an idea for 7 hours but 2 days later she’s already onto smth else n doesnt even remember being so obsessive abt that other thing ? a mess . is also Quite abrasive ? if she thinks ur acting dumb shes not gonna be scared to call u out on it . can also have a Reaally explosive temper . not usually but specially during manic episodes she can be quite easy to annoy ngl . is very unreliable , especially if ur not too close .. tbh that is something connected to her disorder . when she’s on a manic episode , she will be too busy planning things she will never get around to doing or painting her entire house or spending 3 days awake n drunk writing 17 songs by herself . n during her depression is very hard to get her to do anything n even if she feels terrible , she rly cant be an available friend .

in regards to her sexuality , she’s an open bisexual and also is a crazy romantic n falls so hard for literally no reason . but like ... doesnt have the healthiest mentality for relationships ? not like in a toxic way but she will usually give 145% of herself at all times n honestly believes all of the ppl she falls for are the one (1) just wants to make things work no matter what . she’s v impulsive w/ meeting n falling for ppl tho so things dont rly end up working n she always ends up heartbroken over it . Well . At least she’s trying right ?

in regards to her career n art , she’s posted youtube covers n original songs for a couple years and gathered a decent following ? she wasnt huge or anything but she did get a record deal w an actual big label out of it a few months ago . blue was pretty happy abt it but then when the recording process started she realized they werent treating her as she thought she deserved at all ? which resulted on her taking her thoughts to some reps of the label n when she didn’t feel any difference in the way she was being treated she took it to the public ? which definitely caused quite a sitr bc she wasn’t a huge name but she was big enough ? so now she’s in some considerable trouble w her label but Also more famous than ever so they are choosing not to bury her for now ? she’s in some definite trouble though so it’ll be fun to see what happens next n what her moves will be ? spoiler alert : it’ll prob be smth dumb.

i still have so much to say but i’m so lazy wow . dont start ur intros so close to opening time folks thats my tip as an old internet auntie . OK SO ONTO SOME CONNECTIONS NOW

some label mates who she may or may not get along with ?

hookups !! she prob has a few she regrets too bc who doesnt am i right

best friends !! ppl who actually support her n she loves w no restrictions just love all around friends

exes </3 not gonna lie i have some sad ideas abt this one

good influence bc blue is a mess she needs one of those pls someone slap her head n make her drink some water

a fling she has feelings for but may not be requited ... i like my romantic connections to be angsty did yall notice

artistic soulmate !! someone her artistic bitch side just vibes with ? could be a songwriter or singer or anything tbh

some indecisive romantic shit where blue rly knows sh’s too messy n this person is too amazing ? but they still have feels so ... now what ?

this is p mcuh it ?? it has taken so long to finish this i hate myself but HEY if u like blue or dislike her u should hit me up so we can come up w some plot ideas ? i wish i had a quirky goodbye idea but my brain has just quit working guys so u get nothing from me other than a good old fashioned goodbye thanks for ur attention i love u

#cala.intro #sometimes i surprise even myself w how unorganized i can be #i am sorry this is so messy im trying to keep it on brand tm #also i cant believe i actually finished this

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booksluvers · 7 years

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Legend The Fault In Our Stars.

Hi Guys! So a lot of you been requesting for me to review this oh-my-god-i-need-to-have-it-novel into my own words. I didn’t know you guys enjoyed my previous reviews a lot tho. Anywho, i thought i’ll give it a try on this one since this is my favourite novel until now.

The Fault in Our Star or to be short , TFIOS is a billion hit back in 2012. But i didnt get my hand on it until 2015. Let me tell you what i feel throughout the journey of reading that novel.

I found TFIOS laying on the shelf of books in Popular Bookstore. It stood there, as if lighting was on it only. Me being typical me, I grabbed it and read the synopsis behind the cover. And boy oh boy how madly i was falling in love with it at that time. If i could anything to be my spirit animal, it would be TFIOS. Although it is not actually an animal but how can i say this novel is beyond myself. This novel resembles me.

I couldn’t keep my inner excitements calm, the moment i reached home, i was already on bed with my pyjamas on and TFIOS in my hand. I made sure the environment of my room is tfios-ly (you know what i meant hehe).

The story starts with a girl named Hazel Grace Lancaster—a 16-year-old with cancer that has spread to her lungs—attends a cancer patient support group at her mother's behest. At first she hesitates because she feels like it has done her nothing. She thinks attending the support group could be the worst part of her life, until a particular support meeting, Hazel meets a 17-year-old boy named Augustus Waters, whose osteosarcoma caused him to lose his right leg, which was replaced with a prosthetic. Augustus is at the meeting to support his friend, Isaac, whose only remaining eye is soon to be removed due to cancer. Hazel and Augustus strike a bond immediately and agree to read each other's favorite novels. Augustus gives Hazel The Price of Dawn, and Hazel recommends An Imperial Affliction, a novel written by Peter Van Houten, who lives in Amsterdam, about a cancer-stricken girl named Anna that parallels Hazel's own experience. After Augustus finishes reading her book, he is frustrated upon learning that the novel ends abruptly without a conclusion.

Hazel explains the novel's author had retreated following the novel's publication and has not been heard from since.A week later, Augustus reveals to Hazel that he has tracked down Van Houten's assistant, Lidewij, and, through her, has managed to start an e-mail correspondence with Van Houten. The two write to Van Houten with questions regarding the novel's ending and the fate of the mother of Anna. Van Houten eventually replies, explaining that he can only answer Hazel's questions in person. At a picnic, Augustus surprises Hazel with tickets to Amsterdam to meet Van Houten.While in Amsterdam, Augustus confesses his love for Hazel. Hazel and Augustus finally meet Van Houten but are shocked to find that he is a mean-spirited drunk.

Horrified by Van Houten's behavior, Lidewij confesses to having arranged the meeting on his behalf, angering Van Houten, who proceeds to insult Hazel's cancer, starting an argument and causing Hazel and Augustus to flee from the drunken author's home.Augustus confesses that his cancer has returned. The two affirm their love and support for each other. Upon their return to Indianapolis, Augustus's health worsens and he ends up in the ICU for a few days.

Fearing his death, Augustus invites Isaac and Hazel to his pre-funeral, where they give eulogies. An extremely sick Augustus dies soon after. This leaves Hazel heartbroken and she doesn't know what to do with herself. After this traumatic event, Van Houten shows up at Augustus's funeral to apologize to Hazel.Hazel learns that Augustus was writing a sequel to An Imperial Affliction. Hazel reads Augustus's words. He says getting hurt in this world is inevitable, but we do get to choose who we allow to hurt us, and that he is happy with his choice, and hopes she likes her choice too. The book closes with Hazel stating that she is happy with her choice.

It’s obviously a pretty BIG lie if i didn’t cry when Augustus died aye? This books just brought you to the cancer world, to the side of world that normal people wouldn’t feel. Unlike any other novel, you dont get a happy ending. Instead, and ending that you couldn’t complain but to embrace with it. It is indeed, mark a scars on your heart.

(23/9/2017)

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