#ngl this is somewhat good
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Happy spot
Pairing: Sam Carpenter x LeeReader
Summary: After Sam feels a little down she knows her gf will be there to cheer her up
Warnings: Tickling, mouth tickles, a bit sentimental in the beginning kissing, nothing too major
Note: I'm back (for a bit) but I thought I could share a fic for this rainy day :)
Sam recollects a memory she had before arriving to New York.
When you two started seeing each other it happened to be after the brutal attack of Woodsbro. Already Sam wasn't in the best mental state, you knew that. Sam wasn't the best at being vulnerable towards her feelings, knowing that she wasn't okay and was trying to seek help. You being the supportive girlfriend was willing to help her towards every step, every trial, even on her bad days you would help her. She talked about that with her therapist, that moment she told you and she was embraced by your touch for almost an hour.
“I never cried so hard after that."
“I just feel bad...that sometimes I don't show how much she means the world to me."
Sam knows you do a lot around the house. After your day job you tidy up the house a bit and then make dinner for Tara and her friends. You make sure Sam comes home to a clean house. The smell of a home cooked meal with fresh lilac sheets. Then you having the energy to snuggle up to Sam every night so she sleeps soundly. All that you do and Sam feels guilty that she hasn't given much back. Even though you say her smile is the best part about your day, or that it's the least you can do since Sam saved your life.
Sam came home extra early tonight, seeing what you maybe up to around this hour. Since you had the day off you had lots to do today. You were too focused on your special meal of the day that you didn't notice Sam coming towards you, planting a kiss on your cheek.
“Hey.", Sam says. You turned around and hugged her, as Sam notices your little chef outfit on. You watching a season of The Bear suddenly made you a chef, even though just last week you burned a grilled cheese.
“I have a surprise for you on the couch. But don't open it until I come.", You say, eager to finish cooking so you can give it to Sam. Sam always loved your gifts made by hand. It made her feel like a kid, having a huge smile from getting gifts from her school crush. Learning new things seemed to work for you, although you often had paper cuts and Sam had to kiss all of them so you'd feel better. She sits on the couch, waiting patiently for you to arrive. You did your jolly steps to the living room, handing a purple bag to Sam's lap. She thought you actually bought something when you really didn't, you just made it and wanted to be extra by wrapping it in a bag.
“Open it. I think you're going to like it.", You say, barely containing your excitement. Sam can show by how you weren't sitting down or else you would get jittery. She took off the wrapping paper, now holding a crochet stuffed bunny you made for her. It was cream colored, with a mini crochet blanket so the bunny won't get cold. Sam didn't know what to say or do, in the same breath she wanted to hug you but also wanted to cry. She was never gifted with a stuff animal, with all the years of being alone she drenched of having a stuff animal to hold closely to her chest.
“Do you like it?", You ask, followed by a warm smile to Sam. She sets the bunny on the coffee table next to the bag. She grabbed your entire body to her lap, hugging you tightly with love. You loved her security blanket hugs, until the hug ends up in the wrong spot.
“Love you too Sam ACK! SAM!", You say, feeling an unfamiliar squeeze to your mid area. Sam was never going to let you go. For a gift like that she plans on hugging you until she falls asleep. Hugs like this you couldn't escape from. You did once, until Sam chased you down and dragged you back so you can watch 90 day fiance with her.
“SAM! SAM! NOHOHOHO!!", You say laughing which each poke sent against your side. Your legs keep kicking with your head throwing back in laughing on Sam's shoulder. She smiled, enjoying the big grin you had on your face. Gifts weren't your love language but affection was, especially for tickles. Being tickled was worth a thousand gifts for you.
You looked at her, trying to hold the last bit of composure you had. Until you were moving at Sam's skittering fingers moving to your sides. “What's wrong? I'm barely touching you.", Sam says, giving you that teasing voice. You pout, cupping her hands and softly presses your lips to hers. Both of your heads were screaming fireworks at the kiss. The moment was romantic until her fingers caught back at your side. Instead of holding it in you giggle, which is much better than making funny faces to Sam because you're holding it in.
“Sam! Let go!", You say, tugging at her arms again.
“You want me to let go? I can do that.", Sam says, setting you down on the couch, making your tummy lay on her lap. Sam's hands come under your shirt, skittering her nails across your ticklish tummy. You laugh your head off, trying your best not to kick Sam due to how bad you squirm. You knew any violence would cause her to restrain your arms. “SAM! SAM! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!", You laugh, trying to get Sam's piano fingers off your tummy and torso. Of course you weren't trying, your hands were still covering your face as you knew for a fact the laughing was making your cheeks turn pink.
“STOP!!", You say before the tickling overtakes you, making you unable to say anything else. “Stop what darling?", Sam teases, knowing you love it, but also knowing you can't say the tword. She stops the tickling momentarily to give you a chance to respond. You were about to until she makes eye contact, making it impossible to recite anything. You smile in silence, in which Sam's heart was about to burst by how adorable you were. “Spare me please?", You ask politely of Sam to take it easy. Sam doesn't listen, she never does but it's because she goes by the opposite of what you say.
“No.", She says with a lovely grin and tickles your tummy again. This time you did kick as you didn't see the tickling coming. “FUVKFUCKHAHAHHA!!", You say, the cursing coming up as you laugh. The torture stops for a minute once again for Sam to say something absolutely ruthless, or corny.
“You know, they should make shirts that say tickle the cook. I'd certainly like that.", Sam says, causing a light blush to appear on your face. Withstanding all the tickling your apron was still on, being wrinkled up by the moving.
“But I guess kiss the cook works well too.", Sam says, putting an evil smirk on her face. This time you were grateful you weren't pinned upon Sam's great strength. But with your sudden movements she unexpectedly had your arms pinned under her knees. “No no no no SAM!" You say, giving little kicks for Sam to see. You kind of regret it, knowing that in seconds she could attack your feet. She kisses your forehead before moving to your lips, whispering a tease into your ear to give you loads of butterflies.
“You're so cute when you panic baby.", Sam says, giving you loads of tummy kisses afterwards. You didn't know why she trapped her arms if all she was giving was tummy kisses. But then the raspberries and armpit tickles came and that's when being pinned down was needed. “NOOOHAHAHHAH!!", You say, giving the biggest belly laugh Sam has ever seen. She felt so content of giving you pokes on your stomach, leading down to your armpits to messing with your ticklish ears.
“Don't be so dramatic I know you love this." She says, bundling you up with belly kisses again. She luckily set your arms free to wiggle around. But within that time you locked lips with her again. It was almost turning into a post tickle make out thing until she wanted a few kisses on your tummy. Fluttering tummy kisses was a good mix with the kisses. You both gave soft pecks, giggling in between and feeling Sam's hands wrap around your waist.
“Your so fucking adorable.", Sam says.
“And you're the best girlfriend ever.", You say.
“Gosh y'all are so gay.", Mindy says, rolling her eyes at the intimate moment you guys were sharing.
#ngl this is somewhat good#the rain made me in such a lee mood#even though there's supposed to be a hurricane or something#but i know people loved my sam carpenter tickle fic#also thanks for the love for that fic#tickle#tickle fic#scream6#sam Carpenter
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2023 Las Vegas Grand Prix - Qualifiying - Fernando Alonso
#half asleep making these istg#yayyyy p9? idk ig i expected him to do better#old man asleep at the wheel whats new 😴#he was very quick w this interview i wonder if he was eager to get to bed#i certainly am rn#f1#formula 1#fernando alonso#2023 las vegas gp#(i wish i could atop feeling insecure abt my gifs. i do it for fun.)#(of course i want them to look somewhat good but i get a bit ill over it)#(there was somw drama on here at some point that made me want to completely stop posting then ngl)#(cause like what is the point if im not as good as others ig :/ this is kinda vague posting but it made me so uncomfortable)#(as i said. i do it for fun in quick time bcs yay jsut wanna post smth i found cute)#(but ever sincce that thing happened its just made me extremely self critical and insecure abt posting)#(idk why im saying this. kinda repressing the urge tk be like 'SRY THESE ARE TERRIBLE. YEAH.')#(i need to sleep. but i often feel like this literally every time i post now bcs some people get on their high horse and ruin people's fun)#(iykyk ig. its smth bothering me lately. but i hate to act so morose. but i still feel bad abt the quality sometimes. i guess.)#we do a little bit of f1
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I caught up to the oshi no ko manga recently and can I say whatever aquakane has going on is fucking insane good lord. Not platonic not romantic but a secret third thing (fake dating to “I have feelings for you” “I have feelings for you too” *narrator voice* the feeling was friendship to willing to commit a murder so the other won’t return to a spiraling revenge quest, a murder she was 100% down with since the moment it was implied to complicated exes but goddammit I still see through your bs and care about you idiot I’m gonna ruin your clearly self saboteering revenge quest and also it’s all super ace coded)
#truly no one is doing it like them#aqua is a character who wraps himself in five layers of bs and thinking he’s not obvious but akane sees through him fast#and that plus the fact she’s super amoral when it comes to their relationship and above all just wants him to be happy makes it so#interesting. she switches gears super fast but it doesn’t feel strange bc she still has the same priority#like I think it starts with a feeling of gratitude and debt bc he saved her life but she clearly enjoys his presence and company a lot so#it’s not just that. ngl when we get more info on the dad I wouldn’t be surprised if him and ai end up having parallels to aquakane#like I wouldn’t be surprised if this was someone ai did genuinely care about that it was also someone who could somewhat see through her bs#though with less good intent lol. and smth smth akane taking so much of ai in but also the imagery of her with the flowers and knife. hm hm#oshi no ko#aqua hoshino#akane kurokawa
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Spirit animal SQH
#svsss#shang qinghua#but mainly I'm just here to vague post LMAO I don't like to vague post its not very effective in terms of venting but#but basically I guess I'm becoming hyperaware of my like... cognitive dissonance codependency and derealization ee#also my general laziness ig and where it overlaps into executive dysfunction or whatever like I may genuinely have some issues but#I am also a lazy son of a bitch jfjfkgkg and i need to figure out how to figure it out so I can work on both in more effective ways hhggg#oh yeah but basically the thing to remember for later is the silence in the call and the immediate unmute and chat activity once I left#I should remember this and stop interacting I think? I should try to give em space I think I'm being too clingy or something#or maybe my own silence is too awkward and dampens the call? I was kinda just spacing out and not doing anything so I get its kinda weird#LMAO so I should just like try not to be in call for those times mm#I just like being in call with my friends jdhfkg but I suppose its not very good either#I overindulge I suppose another friend pointed it out to me before too haha but fjfjjt its just easier than facing bouts of dread by myself#eehh and that's why I gotta do something about my Metnal Ailneses hfjfj but ngl I don't really know how to go about it...#I get embarrassed looking stuff up djfnfkg and half the time I don't even know what to look up I just draw ?s and I give up#I suppose I also have commitment issues too but that ones not new which is an issue of itself aaaaaaaa#man idk idk I just don't really get it I guess djdjfjf and I've got existential dreads and think maybe it doesn't really matter whats wrong#cause there's no point to fixing them because ultimately I'm gonna die alone and a failure anyways? so like ehfjgkg idk#its depressing and I know its like sabotage cause my brain is being a little silly a little goofy and its not a shared sentiment#with the better half of me and the entirety of my friends but yknow its just ee harder sometimes to believe in the optimism ig#and i can talk about it somewhat normally and without like having a ✨️break down#but yknow djfjgkg I'm very emotional a person ya? I think sqh is relatable for gods sake 💀#irrationality sentimentality nihilism and existential dreads... wanting to die because living is too hard despite all my hopes for living...#just the ol regulars yknow?#and another thing... do I talk to my friends about these things? I vent them out here a lot but what do I really want?#I'm not strong enough to keep it to myself clearly but I'm also too proud to share these thoughts? I dump them out in the open and for what?#whenever someone reaches out with concern and care I don't respond in kind and refuse to elaborate?#so like what do I want with this? I guess I want someone to know I'm going insane half the time I'm awake? but not do anything about it?#that's pretty unfair I guess... and stupid I think I do want to share my thoughts with someone but I'm too scared of the ramifications#and that my pride can't stand the fact I might be looked differently by my friends even tho the image they have of me is already quite silly#man.... idk.... I'll come to conclusions myself and do nothing about them so I guess that'll happen again aah idk idk idk
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What is something you feel people need to keep in mind when writing Ben in a fanfic or crossover? What is something that could instantly get you hooked if someone added it (except having Ben) or that could get you to drop the fic instantly?
Perhaps saying it like this is not specific enough, but I dislike when they don't make him seem real. I think that there's more depth to his character than just overconfidence or overconfident quips or whatever you'd call it. Similarly to one of the common criticisms which claim that Ben is either strictly a serious or comedic character, as if he can not have both qualities. As if those qualities don't actually connect underneath the surface.
And I don't say this to try to make him seem like some kind of insanely profound character. He's not that complicated. There are good fanfics that don't dive into character analysis territory. But, like all other (well-written) characters, Ben is the person he is because of where he came from. It's insult to that to dumb him down or ignore that.
Something that turns me away from a fic is probably if the author didn't bother to look deeper than the most simplified version of the character. Cartoon Network sometimes does this to a degree, too. I don't like when they make him like, a caricature. Or like, a mascot. I don't know how else to describe it. Often by focusing on one character trait (usually overconfidence) and then chalking him up to just being "a jerk" (overused descriptor that isn't even entirely accurate or deserved). That's probably due to how seriously I took the character, but there's just something disrespectful about it.
If you don't care to get to know a character, you're not gonna write them correctly.
#I had to think about this one a bit ngl#good question ig#truth be told I don't stick around a fanfic long enough to really know how bad the portrayals are if the fanfic isn't great to begin with#but I hope this answers your question somewhat#ask#ben 10#ben tennyson#ben 10 fanfic#ben 10 fanfiction#ben 10 criticism
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many things to unpack here
#this is three dialogue boxes but has so many things ive been saying packed into it#1. tsukasa follows tori's activities#2. hokuto loves tori a lot <3 i love what they have#3. tsukasa thinks tori is good-looking#or like. i really like the way he worded it ngl its ambiguous enough but positive#it's funny because when he's talking to tori he is all your voice is annoying/you're not cute you're a demon!#but when talking to someone else hes like yeah he is cute But#like at least he somewhat admits it to himself#but denying it in front of tori is a vibe honestly#enstars#torikasa#mar's midnight rambles
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#here's some of the classics on that list i have beef with btw:#i have tried to read A Confederacy of Dunces several times and it's funny but it's also so cringe and Ignatius is so obnoxious#that i find it too difficult to finish like i just feel depressed and bad for everybody around him too much#i tried reading Infinite Jest like a decade ago and i got like 200 pages in and i remember thinking it felt like#such a slog the entire time because he's just so gd wordy and also i stopped liking DFW after i heard the abuse allegations against him#frankenstein i didnt read that long ago but i just remember finding it so boring for some reason?? i feel i might need to read it again#dracula ngl i feel like im cheating a bit saying ive completely read it because i loved the beginning and then HATED so much of the rest#the characters were just so boring and melodramatic hahaha i just liked the part where jonathan was doing a travel diary#and trapped in the castle tbh and after that i skimmed quite a bit#i almost flipped my shit when i saw ender's game on there because I ALWAYS mix it up with ready player one by ernest cline#which i bought the audiobook of a while back and hated every minute of it i dont think its good at all#but it wasnt that so phew my faith in this list is somewhat restored#i read most of the first game of thrones book and was disappointed tbh maybe because id seen the show already#so i was like 'this feels almost exactly the same except worse?' because i'd been expecting it to give me more depth and insight#into the characters but instead it felt exactly the same and i still didnt love any of the characters enough to feel attached to them#also i am fully aware me not personally liking or vibing with a book doesnt mean it doesnt deserve to be considered great btw#but i think if youre gonna be like me and force yourself to go through a bunch of lists like this very seriously then you also need to just#let yourself be like 'yeah not for me' without feeling too bad about it sometimes too#often times i dont particularly love the classics or 'important books' but at the same time#i still feel like im getting more out of reading them than just grabbing the newest hyped up books that also dont do anything for me#maybe not in a 'wow i loved reading this' way but in like a#'i now have first-hand knowledge of this thing that is so influential / so frequently referenced'#or 'this challenged me and i feel like i did a mental/emotional workout or gave me some new food for thought'#or 'made me more aware of what gaps in my knowledge and reading skills and what my tastes are too'#sort of way...#it really just depends on what you're reading for and why and what you're hoping to get out of it a lot of the time maybe#it's like the homework i give myself to go through these lists that i also intersperse with the stuff i read more just for fun#p
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Apparently I should stop posting my works here as tumblr gonna sell our personal data to a fucking ai. I don't want to be a part of this and I don't see the point in keeping my acc on this platform anymore (i'll try everything to protect my work and maybe post it somewhere else)
I know I've been mostly inactive recently and barely posted anything (I'm on my graduation year at uni and have to combine two jobs and help my fam while my mental health keeps getting worse, it's difficult and I have almost no time for art) so it's not gonna be any different now. I apologize for not making content you've expected from me..
Anyway, the situation with art rn is not motivating at all. Platforms keep feeding greedy lazy pigs with our data and our works without consent, nobody values our efforts, our skills and us. I really am too close to quit drawing and trying to build an art career. I'm scared of the future.
Also
Fuck you tumblr.
#ngl I will miss everyone here since soviper community was somewhat more active on tumblr and it gave me motivation#but now this little community is asleep or even dead since there's barely any new content with them so..#thanks for good memories and for your support. i really appreciate it!
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top ten fun things to do as a hobby: put mama mia in my singing monsters
#i have really gotta find a way to record this and show everyone#it's kinda good ngl#(i mean i am using sheet music so it's not super impressive i guess#)#but also it is tedious so i think it's still somewhat impressive
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Becoming obsessed with a new show is so insane like I'm not even finished with S1 of LR but here I am sitting with a 17,200+ word outline of a fic that isn't even half conceptualized along with five other +2,500 word outlines that also aren't half conceptualized and about 25+ fic ideas jotted down in my notes. I'm feeling completely normal about Lab Rats 🫶
#and ngl I feel nervous to even potentially share these some day if I even continue writing#I say that because I wrote a few pics for my other fandom but then I just lost motivation to write when I became less obsessed with the sho#but I'm not even knee deep into LR and now I have all these fic ideas so I'm hoping my motivation won't fail me now#not to mention almost all of these pics involve a somewhat obscure character *cough cough* look at url *cough cough* that from what-#I've seen the fandom feels iffy about that character so it's honestly just me writing fanfics for myself if I think about it tbh#but I love angst and he has such good angst potential and yeah he's not well written and is honestly a comedic relief character in a way#but I have notes on him and think he's an interesting concept and he could have been so much more (and better written in S3 & 4)#oh yeah I have a lot ideas for art stuff too it's just that I need to practice more before I feel comfortable enough to put stuff on here#anyways if anyone read my tags here's a gold star for reading my crazed thoughts ⭐️#personal
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Not be screaming Insanely to you about strollonso again but I have thots. Thinkings. And yeah.
So like I love how everyone expected them to not get well w each other yk like people THOUGHT they would be on each others throats, and nando would commit warcrimes against lance etc etc(Especially after last years Austin incident yeahh....)WHILE they were actually ALREADY on good terms in 2021(the recent gifs that showed lance being like a teenager w crush ykyky)(plus I do remember photos of them interacting just casually) and before that yk when nando congratulated lance on his first podium in baku(which I'll never get out of my head gladly)
And like NOW they are also so well w each other ESPECIALLY now that they are teammates. And its NICE and they are COMFY plus WHAT HAPPENED IM BAHRAIN OFC. And now wih nando casually making lance photos..they are so comfortable. Like aughh.
Thats all I guess please add anything you have in mind aswell 😭😭
Well I think it's funny because, as you mentioned, one of the only pre-2023 moments of strollonso I remember distinctly is when they had the collision during the US gp 😭 and I feel like everyone saw that and were like "oh god Nando is gonna kill him when they're teammates", and then a similar situation kinda happened again at the very first gp when Lance hit the back of Nando but when Nando found out, he's just like "okay :)"
I wonder though sometimes what they'd be like if the AMR23 was like the prev one. Because I do think Nando does actually like Lance, but also I don't think you can deny that Nando's podiums are indeed a buffer. Kinda like him being like "anything you can do to me is literally nothing because I have a great car and I'm doing better than I have in years", like bro is on top of the world after so long, and it feels like he's gotten a second wind where nothing can really touch him or bother him.
I hate how everyone uses that "Lance is the owner's son, so of course Fernando will treat him nicely" argument. Like yeah that's a factor, but I feel like I see it more as Nando appreciating Lance bcs he factors into why Nando has a good car and a good team in the first place. I think tho my fav strollonso plot line is Nando being like "ugh ill put up w him I guess", but then he ends up having such a good car and finds out in the process that Lance is more than he ever considered(like in this fic ) And also the narrative of Nando being a very different, supportive teammate as compared to most other Lance has had. I like that they probably came into being teammates with certain assumptions, but now look at how comfy they are with each other!! Enough to tease each other is such public ways, like Lance saying certain things in interviews and Nando with his socmed. It's very fun!
BUT YEAH OH MY GOD THAT CLIP OF THEM WITH LANCE BEING SO TOUCHY AND SHOVEY WITH HIM!!!! people need to look back at older clips like that and the others you mentioned before they make assumptions about why they are the way they are >:(
#i mean they've gotten worse and worse(affectionate) but look at lance! he was already teasing nando at the launch!#i just think people think very badly about nando and cant get out of that mindset and consider that he is just having actual fun atm#like i do think that him kinda being top dog in amr factors into why he treats lance so well#but neither of them mind their roles in the team so i dont get why its a bad thing#nando has a good car and a teammate who will along w him and not take it for granted cough cough ocon#so of course hes gonna be having a lot of fun and will actually enjoy being w that teammate#he is just a very competitive guy which i think somewhat makes it hard for him to get along w other teammates#but lance is super chill and i think they suit each other because of that#both of them are menace4menace but at opposite ends of the scale#like that meme where the guy is holding the leash of the other guy vibrating could work either way for them ngl#but hehehe elle come talk to me anytime i fucking love them so much#I think people just act like extenuating circumstances make it a fake relationship or fake dynamic of whatever#but i think its just that theyre not the blueprint for what teammates are usually like in f1 and thats okay!!#they respect and appreciate each other's roles and strengths and dont try to walk all over the other#like people saying that the spain finish was patronising to lance#uhhh no beacuse lance has and will do the exact same shit for nando#but for some reason people think its mind games#but anyways its very nice how they suit each other and how they act with each other!!!#and elle also dont worry ablut ranting bcs ill just reply w like 10x what you wrote#catie.asks.#strollonso
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#i think part of the reason as to why i have been having such trouble writing lately is that i'm worrying too much about it#worrying too much about being good and pleasing whoever will read it#and being 'poetic' and things like that#like. damn girl#just write whatever you're writing and go for the throat#pressuring myself and holding myself to all those standards have really been sucking the joy out of writing for me ngl#i tense whenever i go and open docs#ugh.#i also think that's why hand-writing the sketch of the thing is easier for me too#the problem comes when i try to digitalize it but oh well#let's go#i'll try to calm somewhat and then write#my ramblings
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happy happ hap to the 32 year old weird man /lh 🎉
v sketches + old version of this fanart down below!! v
left: August 22, 2021 -> right: August 22, 2022 (both done within a day!!)
#bo burnham#bo burnham inside#bo burnham birthday#bo burnham fanart#birthday#my art#a little late for me to post this here but lemme tell you how i struggled posting this on Insta hsdhf 🥴😔#silly fact: this is actually a redraw from one of last year's Bo birthday fanarts but i've forgotten to post it here somehow#it's under the Keep Reading tab if you wanna see + its comparison with the redraw#thank goodness i've somewhat improved ngl cuz seeing the old one hurts a bit of me inside hhsh /hj#i rushed that one unlike the entire Burnt Hams series fanarts and boy does it deserve a redraw#alright done rambling now hsdfjsd ✌
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I present to y’all
~Old digital art~
Old fnaf art (swirly was in her white girl ara-forgive me for my sins)
#drawing#art#my art#old art#the only good old art I have is fnaf art ngl#she was glitchy white/hj#oc/sona#fnaf#doodle#you can somewhat see how I grew#almost no out lines#also I may be thinking of something rn and can’t really think cause of it-
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Idk how to readmore on mobile,,
Sometimes I feel like such a fake adult. Like I know it isn't true (disabled experiences aren't childish etc) but like . Instead of gaining independence I got more dependent than I was even as a child. Whenever people talk about what Being An Adult Means they'll talk about independence and things you can do and having more Life Experience and I suppose I have more Life Experience but it is distinctly different to the normal More Life Experience that other 23 year olds have. I can't drink and very much couldn't by the time 21 rolled around so I never have. Instead of getting more independence I became super dependent bc of the symptoms and such. I got a lot of experience learning to sit on hold with doctors offices like every other day and figuring out myself if the incredibly painful symptom was serious and if the seemingly innocuous one was. And now I'm really good at figuring out if The Bad Symptom is coming back but hopefully that's a useless skill because I have my medicine now? but other 23 year olds are like, here is my College Graduated Skills and my Work Experience Skills and my Living Alone Skills. (And my Relationships skills but I'm not sure I'd have managed to gain experience there even without illness fubdhbdjbhv) And I'm like. Ah. We have....so little in common.... Idk just. Grggrhrgrhggh
#beeep#i think i would be GOOD at living alone skills once i have the chance to catch up on the missing ones#but i also would've been in that some boat some years earlier if not for the It#same boat"#*#ngl i think i wouldve found ''adulting'' easier than the huge shitshow of 2020-2021#and somewhat 2022 but that one was more trying to get the medicine to work and all that#idkkkk. sighs. SIGHS#i know (or mostly know) that the people that matter understand why im not caught up to where they are but#i always feel like strangers and like . relatives get a little judgy about me being so behind. like theyre assuming its just cus im#childish and like i suppose i am but its in the nd way like likinh sparkly shows im very good at responsibility (or i was...)#its just very frustrating to get looked down on and try and be like Im Like You when im very much Not#just u guys wait....when u get old and the medical problems start coming....oooo then YPU will be behind. hmph.#those biting and blood memes i wanna have things in common with people i wanna have things that are okay to talk about too
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when eugene tooms is so creepy and gross that between him and that sewer monster from “the host”-ep, me and my friend would pick the sewer monster to cuddle with
#the x-files#(we're rewatching it from the beginning)#tooms' defense lawyer you were prolly a good guy but you're so fucking stupid#tooms can only act somewhat normal in the courtroom but even then just barely#once in the outside world he doesn't even try#he's not normal you can't converse with him i'm sorry#there are no cognitive thoughts in his head at all#anyway. the sewer monster? he did nothing wrong actually#bro doesn't even know what's going on he just wants to go back to the ocean!!!!!#meanwhile fbi's being all serious about giving the monster a psych evaluation.... about prosecuting it#i'm laughing#(ngl tho i would watch that too)
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