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#my girl twink girlfriend number two !
fadeintoyou1993 · 1 year
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LILY COLLINS as Emily Cooper Emily in Paris (2020—) Season 3
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demiace-wen-ning · 3 years
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MXTX books ranked on least gay to gayest (spoilers)
3) MDZS: Not saying that it’s not really gay because it definitely is. Lan Wangji is the second gayest gay to ever gay in a MXTX books and Wei Wuxian invented disaster bisexual. It’s also got murder twinks in spades, something which the other books lacked (my disappointment is immeasurable) which is both very gay and very sexy of it. Xiao Xingchen managed to score the classic black/white dynamic with not one but TWO men. Also, Guanyin Temple made everyone forget that XiYao weren’t actually the main couple or a couple. Still it’s the MXTX book with the most straights and unlike the other two, most of the character didn’t necessarily give off particularly queer vibe, making it the least gay MXTX book (forgive me, Hanguang-jun). 7.5/10, would have gotten another point had Baoshan Sanren and Lan Yi had been girlfriends in the novel too.
2) TGCF: While this book has some straights, the sheer amount of non-straights more than makes up for it. MXTX really fucking decided to pull a ‘Free!’ and give every single character a boyfriend. FengQing have daily homo-erotically charged fights that have more often than not almost turned into heated make-out sessions (not that they’d admit it). Yin Yu once hit Quan Yizhen on the head with a shovel and it was awesome (only if he didn’t keep running away, Shixiong come back-). There’s even an old gay divorced couple. Hua Cheng did not need to go so hard on his simping for that one guy who was nice to him a few times but he did and that’s so sexy of him. Also, Hua Cheng’s kinda overall super gay, with his Mary Poppins Umbrella that Xie Lian gave to him along with a crush that would last lifetimes, and his butterflies and his sword which was made out of his eye (yes, that’s also gay, no, I will not be elaborating). I mean, no guy who goes that hard on aesthetics is straight. Also this book has Shi Qingxuan. Nothing more needs to be said. 800/10, did the ‘gay love saves the day’ troupe better than BingQiu.
1) SVSSS: It was extremely tough to determine which MXTX novel was the gayest but SVSSS won out. Even the straights are gnc. Cucumber bro invented homophobic gay. Every single person was at least a little bit in love with him (even his boyfriend’s dad was a little into him), making him the closest an MXTX character ever came to having a harem. I mentioned how Lan Wangji was the second gayest gay to ever gay in a MXTX book and that’s because the first spot belongs to Liu Qingge. My man was literally faced with like a dozen naked succubi and did not bate a fucking eye before proceeding to beat them all up (leading Shen Qingqiu to believe he was impotent) but will turn into a tsundere mess everytime he touches Shen Qingqiu’s fan. Also, can we also talk about how the first thing the girls did when gaining more than one braincell was stop being attracted to Luo Binghe? Good for them, get the better taste that Shen Qingqiu severely lacks. But the thing that truly solidifies SVSSS as the gayest MXTX book is the fact it’s the only MXTX book with more than one canon couple. Airplane bro’s self-inserts fanfics that probably didn’t see the light of day since he killed Shang Qinghua off before anyone could be the wiser paid off and his husband at least has the potential to get better at sex so fuck off, Cucumber bro. PIDW number of chapters/10, everyone thank Shen Qingqiu for saving PIDW with Shen Jiu’s fine booty and a better personality.
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shorkbrian · 4 years
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OOOOO okok.... kirishima with a darling who’s his study partner by chance (college) and he just like,,, falls in love with them! but she have a boyfriend so :(((( but he decides the best idea is the take her by the hair and “lovingly” fuck his new little girlfriend, even though the cries pouring out her mouth are anything but... and he just. forces her to be his girlfriend and you’re just miserable babey
Bro bro bror bror b rorr bor rbro rbo
Prelude - He’s like a stereotypical jock, but is super kind and friendly and just a big HIMBO lololol.
Pairing - Kirishima X Reader
Prompt - At the top
Warnings -  NSFW, full non-con here folks. Kirishima doesn’t let reader tell him no. That is NOT cool y’all. Consent is always required.
Music -  https://youtu.be/2k5w6eTxGXk 
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- You’re good at most subjects but this one just really flies over your head. When you went to the teacher, she paired you up with the only other person in the class that seemed to be having trouble, Kirishima. The teacher figured that the two of you could work through the material together.
You didn’t mind. Kirishima seemed like a decent guy, even though he was very physically intimidating. He was on the football team, built like a literal brick wall, but his personality was sunshine and rainbows. The man always greeted you with the brightest smile when you showed up to study.
For the most part, the two of you struggled to get work done. Kirishima could do no more than three problems before getting frustrated or bored, and he’d start making funny faces at you, maybe kick your shins underneath the table to get you to pay attention to him. When you finally looked up to see him with his face contorted in the weirdest way possible, you’d burst out laughing. That’s how the two of you got kicked out the library for a month, had to meet at a coffeeshop to study.
Kirishima liked coffee so sweet that it made you sick, almost gagging after taking a sip of his drink when he offered. Likewise, Kirishima couldn’t stand your tea, said it tasted like “old lady water” and needed sugar. You learned a lot about each other, and eventually reached the point were you would consider the two of you to be friends.
You were friends. Until he decided you weren’t`
——
Today you two are in the library, both of you struggling over your worksheets. A tapping on your shoulder alerted you to the presence of your boyfriend, and you were promptly hopping to your feet, smiling and hugging your boyfriend. He wanted to come see you, spend his lunch break together, so you had told him to meet you in the library, where you and Kiri had rented a study room.
“Midoriya! Hi baby.”
With a kiss on the cheek, your boyfriend was b lushing, pulling out a chair at the table so he could sit down. “Hey, who’s this?”
He was gesturing to Kirishima, who was glaring at your boyfriend. That was odd. Usually the redhead had no problem meeting new people, maybe he was just grumpy because he was trying to study?
“Oh, this is my study buddy, Kiri. Kiri, this is my boyfriend, Midoriya!” Midoriya nodded at Kirishima, and Kiri gave a flick of his head in return, before hunching over to scribble furiously at his paper. Yeah, he was definitely irritated at having his studying interrupted. Unusual, but you figured you should be supportive of the redhead taking his studies seriously.
“Hey babe, let’s go eat out in the courtyard - I don’t wanna make Kiri uncomfortable.”
Your boyfriend nodded, getting up from the seat he had just plopped down in, before giving a sheepish wave to the as the two of you exited the room.
“I’ll be back, sorry!”
you whisper-yelled to Kirishima before the door swung shut.
There was small talk as you and your boyfriend made your way to the pretty courtyard of the college, filled with flowering trees and cozy benches for couples (like yourselves) to sit on.
It was peaceful, sitting there, chatting with your boyfriend while he shared his sandwich with you. He was working as an intern for a big engineering company, and you could tell he was happy about his work as he animatedly recounted what he had done so far that day, pausing every now and then to gulp down a bite of sandwich.
But as all good things must end, your boyfriend had to leave after his lunch break was up, checking the time on his watch and gasping as he realized he had spent way too much time talking to you.
He apologized profusely for his abrupt exit, giving you a brief, slightly messy press of his lips against yours before he gathered his bag, shoving the rest of his sandwich into his mouth. Midoriya waved, skipping backwards, making you chuckle when he tripped and almost fell.
You loved your boyfriend, thought of yourself as the luckiest girl for getting together with the kindest, sweetest man you had ever met.
——
Returning to the private study room, You were surprised to see Kirishima still hunched over his paper, still scratching out numbers. His grip was white-knuckled on the pencil.
“Uh, Kiri? You okay dude?”
“Yeah, it’s whatever, I’m fine.” He didn’t sound fine. The man sounded angry.
Figuring he just maybe needed some space, you shrugged “... I need to go get a book real quick. Need anything?”
“No.”  Was his short reply.
Kirishima was normally a bubbly, friendly person. Why was he so irritated all of a sudden? Did this have something to do with your boyfriend interrupting the study session? 
You pondered over this as you walked through the shelves, partly glad that you weren’t having to dodge other students. You and Kiri usually choose times that the library was relatively empty, just in case the redhead made you choke in laughter again. 
Finding the aisle your book should be in, you meandered slowly to the end, scanning the shelves. Ah! There it was, on one of the higher shelves - but luckily you could still reach if you went on your tippy-toes.
A  big hand slipped around your waist, and suddenly you felt cool air on your backside, as if someone had flipped up the edge of your skirt. You tried to whirl around, smack whichever dumb idiot thought it’d be funny to feel you up, but you were pushed up against the bookshelf before you had the chance, shelf almost rattling with the force.
“Hey—!” Another hand clamped over your mouth, smothering your rather loud protest. The giant hand covered more than half of your face, and you couldn’t help but gasp. Was this really happening? Were you really about to get groped by some meathead senior?
“I’m really disappointed (Y/N).”
Wait.
“I thought what we had was special, thought that I was the only one you looked at like that. That hurts.”
Kirishima?
The hand on your waist dipped lower, and yup - he had flipped your skirt up, was running his hand the top of your panties, feeling the fabric between his fingers. You struggled - tried to kick back, headbutt him, twist out of his grip - but the man was too big. He slipped a finger underneath the elastic waistband of your panties, pulled it back, let it go so it could snap against your skin; make you flinch.
“Newsflash (Y/N), your ‘boyfriend’ doesn’t actually love you. You could do so much better than a little Twink like him. You need a real man, someone who can take care of you and give you what you need, give you anything you want.” What was he talking about? The hand at your mouth was clamping your jaw shut, putting so much pressure against the lower half of your face that you couldn’t even open your mouth, just let out angry whines.  When his other hand traveled around to the front of your body, dancing over the flesh of your hip,  you wiggled, trying to put up a fight. It was useless.
Kirishima shoved his hand down your panties, groaning lowly into your ear when his fingers grazed the tuft of curls above your pussy, before dipping further down to stroke gently over your folds. You shivered, angry whines giving way to distressed whimpers, wanting to yell, scream for the librarian that you knew was at their desk. 
You were hanging on his arm, trying to pull his giant hand away from your face, but there was no point. The man spent hours in the gym, building up his muscles to make him better at football, and it coincidentally made him better at holding you against his body while he slipped a finger into your now-wet cunt.
The side of his thumb was flicking at your clit, his middle finger slowly dragging across your walls. You held back a groan when it thrusted in deeper, passing by your g-spot on the way in. Kirishima noticed.
“Did you get tired of waiting for me to make a move? So needy for a cock to fill you up that you ran and got a boyfriend?” What? You shook your head no, but his fingers clenched down tighter over your face, and you froze in pain.  “I was gonna be so romantic for you, get a bunch of flowers and one of those big stuffed bears. Ask you to be my girlfriend.  But you just couldn’t wait, could you? Had to go and ruin everything.”
His voice was low, his breath tickling your ear and making you shiver as he whispered, practically growling. You had never seem him irritated, let alone angry. You were scared. Another finger slipped into your pussy, and you keened, scrabbling at his arm at the sudden stretch. Kiri snickered.
“Gonna have to take a few more to get you ready for me babe, I’m not a little stick like your stupid excuse for a ’boyfriend’.”
Tears sprang to your eyes. You loved Midoriya, had ever since you met him. He was shy and nervous, but he was also sweet. Midoriya would never treat you like this, would always ask if you wanted to make each other feel good, ask before he so much as looked at you. Kirishima was a brute.
Another finger entered you, and while the stretch stung, you also felt pleasantly full. His thumb was still moving over your clit, and with a muffled wail your hips twitched in the air, grinding down on his thumb as you suddenly came.
Kirishima didn’t stop. He huffed out a quiet laugh, gave your a wet kiss against your neck. “See? Knew you were meant for me. I love you baby, gonna make you feel so good.”
Blinking, you were trying to come down from the height of your pleasure, flinching away from Kiri as his fingers slipped out of you. Oh god, you didn’t want him to keep going. Muffled cries left your lips, desperately trying to get Kirishima to stop, slow down, please wait, but the man was determined. Your panties were pulled to the side, and something big nudged against your entrance. 
“Sorry baby-“ Kiri grunted, beginning to inch his way inside your tight pussy. “You’re just so sexy ’n pretty, can’t hold myself back.”
The mushroom head of his cock popped past your opening, and you squealed in pain. You were wailing behind his hand, and the man could feel the tears dripping onto his fingers as he held your mouth shut, could feel your lips moving as you cried “Stop, stop! Hurts, oh god Kiri it hurts.“
“Shit, baby I’m sorry, ‘m sorry.”  Without moving, you heard the sound of him spitting, and then felt his hand bump against where he was connected to you. He had spit in his palm, and was the rest of his girthy cock with the slickness, practically jerking himself off into your cunt. You cried harder.
“Shh, shhh it’s okay. I’m gonna take care of you. You’ll get to cum again, don’t worry. Bet your shrimpy little bitchboy never had you cumming twice, did he?” His voice turned sour at the end of his sentence, filled with venom at the mere mention of your boyfriend. 
Kirishima moaned, wet hand coming to rest on your hip as he slowly, slowly began inching forward, forcing his cock into your body. It still hurt, but not as much as it had at first - the slide easier with the addition of the man’s spit. It felt like he was pushing himself in forever, his cock could’ve been in your throat by the time his balls pressed flush against you
. He was bottomed out, and you were gasping, struggling to suck in air around your sobs and his giant hand. The redhead stilled, allowing the two of you to adjust to the sensation. While he waited, Kiri brought his hand up to your hair, sweeping it away from your neck so he could kiss the tender flesh their, hair still in his fist.
“You’re so good for me, look at you takin’ all of my cock. Fuck, fuck - you feel so warm.” He whined between kisses, pulling your hair to tilt your head back as he kissed towards the front of your neck. You shivered as the pain zinged through your scalp, sharp and prickly.
The man pressed up behind you had waited long enough. With no warning, he drew back his hips - cock sliding out of you. He was so /big/.  You wished he had prepared you more, at least then you wouldn’t be sore as he pressed back into you, setting up a rhythm of slow, long thrusts.
He was pulling your head back by your hair, making your head rest against his shoulder against your will, your hands still clutching desperately at his arm. Shoved against the bookshelf like this wasn’t very comfortable, but neither was getting your pussy wrecked by a man twice your size. 
Gradually, Kiri’s pace increased, your pussy working to lubricate itself and making each rapid thrust end with a squelching sound and the slap of his plump balls against the top of your clit.  Truthfully, Midoriya had never fucked you this good, but you were fine with the young man’s sexual ability. He would finish inside you, then lick out his cum until you were squirming and writhing on his tongue, and then Midoriya suck at your clit, shove his fingers into you and fuck you fast until you squirted, leaving the both of you in bliss.
Kirishima had carnal desire, sucking dark marks into the column of your throat, accidentally tugging your hair on each thrust, making you climb further onto your tiptoes to try and alleviate the pressure. He was getting rougher, throaty moans being punched out of him on each thrust - the man tried to quiet himself down by burying his face into the crook of your neck, biting down onto your skin. It just made you sob harder, the pain and pleasure mixing and sending you hurtling towards another orgasm.
And then he slammed into you so hard that your feet lifted off the ground, your body held up by his hand in your hair and the cock filling your pussy. A wail escaped you, his hand silencing it, and you came, twitching in the big man’s hold. 
“Oh, fuck, oh my god baby you’re so amazing oh my god, oh my god-“ Your toes brushed against the ground again. Kirishima was slouching his back so he could pummel into your smaller form even harder, babbling into your shoulder as his hips stuttered when he reached his own orgasm.
You sobbed as you felt his warmth filling your insides. 
Kirishima stayed there, leaning his head against your shoulder while he sucked in air, breathing raggedly. On every sob, you could feel his length inside you, and you were so disgusted.
His breathing evened out. Your sobbing quieted down into measly sniffles. Kiri let go of your hair, scratching at your scalp to alleviate the stinging sensation that he knew he must’ve caused by pulling on the strands.
“I’m gonna take my hand off your mouth now, can you be quiet for me?” You nodded, and the brushing grip was released from your face. 
You stayed silent, hand coming up to massage at your jaw where his big fingers had dug into the tender flesh.
“Good. Wanna go back to my dorm to clean up?”
Shaking your head, you barely choking out a panicked “N-no!”, almost forgetting to be quiet in your haste to respond.  Kirishima sighed behind you, pressing his chest against your back as he did so.
“Baby, I said I was gonna take care of you. I wanna take care of you. We’re going back to my dorm.”
He slowly slipped out of you, wincing as the air hit his dick.  With his length leaving you empty, Kiri smoothed your panties back into pale, then wiped his cock on the underside of your skirt before tucking it back into his pants. You wished you hadn’t chosen a skirt that morning when you were getting dressed.
Without another word, Kiri gently turned you around to face him, his eyes filled with a warmth that they always seemed to hold whenever the two of you locked eyes during a study session. His big arms encircled you, pulling you into his broad chest as he squeezed, the hug surprisingly gentle, almost calming. It would have been an amazing hug, if only the man hadn’t raped you beforehand.
  A jacket was being wrapped around  the bottom half of your legs, Kiri securing it so that you wouldn’t flash anyone when he picked you up in his arms, carrying you bridal-style. You rubbed at your eyes, trying to scrub away the tears as your ex-friend carried you towards the library exit, smiling down at you fondly.
“I love you, you know that? I’m gonna take such good care of you baby.” You ignored him.
“And don’t worry about your old boyfriend, I’m going to talk to him and break the news that you aren’t interested in him anymore. You’ve got something much better now.”
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fizzychocolatemilk · 3 years
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You've Got a Friend in Me (You've Got Troubles. I've Got 'em too.) (A Bakudeku Tropetember Fic)
Another Tropetember thingy (this one is a little late though...oops). I classify this one as a fic because it surpassed 1K. This one is for day eight:  5+1 / 3+1 (Five Times + One Time). AO3 link is here. It’s slightly angsty...so beware of feels.
tw: use of the f slur, homophobia, unsupportive parents, bullying
(1.)
“You’ll always be nothing but some dumbass, lightning-bolt faggot! You should just pack up and quit the hero course now. You’re too stupid to ever make it further than some lowly sidekick position,” the boy finished his abuse before dissolving into obnoxious laughter. 
 Said boy was one of Denki’s middle school classmates. Denki had accidentally run into him because he was texting Eijirou. The boy had looked over his shoulder and seen Eiji’s name (along with a heart) and started making fun of him for being “a faggot”. Denki knew he shouldn’t take what some asshole said to heart, but the things that he said reminded Denki of other times when he had been put down similarly. Lots of people seemed to think he was an incompetent dumbass who could never do anything right unless he had help, and, while sure, he was a little slow in academics...he definitely had other skill sets that made him a kick-ass hero! That didn’t mean that it was easy to convince himself of that.
 “Denki-kun! Hi!” a voice broke Denki out of his spiral.
 Denki turned toward the voice and, low and behold, it was Izu-kun. Denki gave Izuku a weak smile and a wave as he stood tensely next to the bully.
 “Denki! Who’s this? A friend?” Izuku asked as he walked up to the two. His voice sounded dangerous, and Denki could hear the “or foe?” that came after his words. At 17, Class 3-A knew that Izuku was dangerously protective of his friends, and they all did their best not to provoke his fury in any way. Because a feral Izuku was terrifying. 
 The bully didn’t know this though, and he simply laughed before “greeting” Izuku, “Ah, guess we’ve got another faggot. Or did you not know that Lightning Dolt here was a twink?”
 Izuku’s aura darkened several degrees at the boy's statement but still he shot the boy a bright (but fake) smile, “I’ll give you three seconds to run before I fucking destroy you.”
 The boy’s face dropped and he blinked, “Uhhh...what?”
 Izuku continued to smile, “One.”
 The boy’s eyes widened in panic, “Wait, man!”
 “Two.”
 The boy started running, “We can talk about this!”
 “Three,” Izuku immediately gave chase—or he would have if Denki hadn’t given him a small shock and held him back. Izuku struggled for a second before sighing and turning to Denki, “Denki-kun, you are more than just a brainless idiot and more than just a...a...you know. You’re amazing and talented in your own right and I’m proud to call you my friend.”
 Denki blinked in surprise before blushing lightly, “Thanks, Izu. I really appreciate it.” He smiled genuinely at Izuku.
 (2.)
“You don’t know what you’re talking about, Momo,” the dark-haired woman stared harshly down at her daughter, “You may feel like this now, but one day you’ll find a nice, upstanding gentleman that captures your heart. Not some...punk-rock freak-girl.”
 Momo stared down at her feet and sighed softly before replying, “Yes, mother.”
 However, as she turned to make her way into the dorms, and her mother turned to meet with the chauffeur, she heard a very familiar voice. “Excuse me, ma’am! Yaoyorozu-san! May I have a word with you?” Momo turned to see Izuku-kun coming down the dorm steps and speed walking down the lawn to meet with the two women. He had a slightly dangerous aura (someone outside of Class A wouldn’t even notice), but Momo stood rigid as her friend stood up to her mother, “Yaoyorozu-san. I think you should consider taking your daughter more seriously. 
 “You might not know me well personally, but Yaomomo-chan and I know each other very well and I would consider us good friends. She’s smart, resourceful, and talented, and I think we can both agree that she will make a fantastic hero. But Yaomomo-chan is also responsible and mature, definitely mature enough to make her own decisions about her relationship choices. 
 “My own mother is very protective of me too, but I think that part of being a parent means accepting and supporting children through their choices and the consequences of those choices (good or bad), even if they aren’t choices that you, yourself, would make. I hope that you can come to respect Yaomomo-chan’s decisions about her own future, and find comfort in the fact that I, and everyone else in Class A, will always offer her our full support. Thank you for your time.” Izuku bowed politely before turning to Momo. “Kacchan made dinner. You should come eat it before it gets cold,” he smiled before heading back inside.
 Momo’s mother looked surprised for a second before saying a quick goodbye and hurrying away. Momo smiled after her before whispering under her breath, “You are a marvelous friend, Izuku-kun.”
 (3.)
Hanta was in a rush to get to class. Usually he was pretty punctual, but today he missed his alarm so he wasn’t feeling the best. Anxious and rushed, he accidentally ran into the worst person reasonably possible.
 “Ahah, if it isn’t the plain-faced tape dispenser from Class A!” Monoma laughed, “Late to class, I see! Tsk, tsk, yet another reason Class B is superior! At the very least we’re punctual!”
 Hanta deadpanned at the slate-eyed boy, “You know you’re late too, right?”
 Monoma’s jaw dropped for a second before he regained his composure. He huffed and took another angle, “Well, at least I have a personality! You’re so boring that it’s a wonder anyone pays attention to you at all. You’re almost more invisible than the invisible girl in your class! Not to mention that you’ll probably never get a girlfriend, hah!”
 Hanta rolled his eyes, despite the pang in his heart, before maneuvering himself to speed-walk past Monoma. “I’m literally dating Shou. It’s been the hot gossip for the past few days, and you’re definitely shallow enough to keep up with the gossip mill.”
 Monoma guffawed, “How did a plain-faced peasant like you end up with someone as high class as Todoroki? It’s a wonder, isn’t it? But, of course, I’m sure you’ve been hearing that for the past few days, haven’t you?”
 Hanta knew that he shouldn’t take anything that Monoma says seriously, but he’d been hearing how “unworthy” he was of Shouto for the past few days (since their relationship became public knowledge). The scathing words got to him and it made him doubt himself a little. He sped off towards his classroom, ignoring Monoma’s jeers in the background.
 That day, during a joint training session, Izuku requested to be paired with Monoma...and maybe Izuku went a little harder than he usually did. Maybe Monoma ended up in the infirmary before class ended, but it was training so Izuku couldn’t really be blamed for accidentally injuring his classmate, could he?
 Hanta smiled as he now had an explanation for the flash of green he swore he saw out of the corner of his eye as he was rushing to class after the encounter.
 (+1.) 
Katsuki slapped Deku on the back after training. “What the fuck was that, nerd?! You fucking beat the hell outta the Copycat Freak! Why can’t you ever go that hard when we train?”
 Deku’s face flushed as he turned a blinding smile at Katsuki. Cute. Katsuki shook himself from his thoughts as Deku started talking to him. “I guess I just got really into the exercise, Kacchan!”
 Katsuki could tell that Izuku’s words weren’t the whole truth but he decided to gloss over it for now in favor of focusing on a topic that had been bugging him. “You’ve been spending a lot of time with Mochi Head lately. Skimping on our training. Any specific reason, Deku?”
 Katsuki watched as Deku’s face flushed again, but this time it made a pit grow in his stomach. The pit grew as Deku stumbled over his words for a few minutes before answering, “We’ve just been helping each other study, Kacchan.” 
 “You’re fucking lying, stupid Deku,” Katsuki scoffed as his heart started cracking, tiny pieces falling into the void. “But it’s fucking fine. If you’d rather waste time with your girlfriend like a dumbass then I’ll take the number one spot all the more easily,” he said, but the words felt ashy in his mouth, empty and non-fulfilling.
 He started walking away when there was a sharp tug on his wrist. “Kacchan!” It was Deku. It was always Deku. Katsuki stopped trying to pull away, but he didn’t turn around yet. “I love you! No one else! Ochako-chan has just been helping me work through my feelings for you! She has feelings for someone else!” Katsuki turned sharply to see Deku staring intensely at him. “You are my symbol of victory. My hero. My Kacchan. It’s only ever been you, so please. Please allow me to stand by your side!”
 Katsuki sniffled before completely breaking down in tears from the emotional taxation of the last few minutes. Being the empathetic crier he is, Deku broke down with him and they held each other and sobbed. After a couple more minutes, Katsuki had pulled himself together enough to respond, “Y-yeah, dumb Deku. Keep your eyes on me.”
 Katsuki stood and extended a hand to Izuku to help him up. Izuku stared at him fondly for a split second before taking his offer. They walked back to the dorms side-by-side and hand-in-hand.
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ghostgothgeek · 4 years
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Blush. Chapter 2
Blush. chapter 2 has just been posted!! This one was written by @ecto-american!
FFN || AO3
Warnings: actual sex ed talk
---
Danny shot her a weak smile as the girls all stood up and began to file out, the room exploding into light conversation amongst students. Mike and Mallory talked to each other at the front of the room as Mr. Lancer continued to game away. Danny sighed as he leaned back in his seat, staring at the clock. Time was going to move purposefully slow. He just knew it. 
“I don’t need to worry about sex ed,” Dash bragged casually as he leaned back in his chair. Danny rolled his eyes. Of course he only brought this up the second the last girl had left the room. “I already know it all.”
“What, you mean like had sex before?” Tucker questioned, staring at him. Dash scoffed, beginning to tip his chair back on the hind legs.
“Course I have, Foul-ley,” came the light scoff. “I’m the star quarterback. Chicks are crazy for me.” He used a foot to keep his balance as he lightly swayed forward and back in the chair. “I go through condoms like crazy.”
“I dunno, Dash. Find it hard to believe you can so easily find microscopic condoms,” Danny replied boredly. Dash immediately slammed his chair legs on all fours.
“What the fuck did you just say to me, Fentoni!?” he snarled. 
“Nothing,” Danny feigned innocence, holding both hands up. 
He stole a glance at Tucker, who was snickering. Danny’s lips twisted as he tried to hold back a smile. He felt a hand grab his shirt, and he snapped his attention forward. Dash had a grip on his shirt, grasping it tightly as he yanked Danny to him.
“Look, ya pathetic little twink,” he sneered. “Just because-”
“Mr. Baxter, Mr. Fenton,” an annoyed, warning tone seemed to echo throughout the class. Dash immediately let go and darted to slip back in his seat. 
“Mr. Lancer,” Dash tried to begin, “Fenton start-”
“Not today, Mr. Baxter,” the teacher tiredly replied, giving him a stern look from over his computer screen. 
Danny didn’t notice that Mallory had apparently left, and Mike was watching them a bit curiously. As soon as Dash had settled back into his seat, Mike spoke.
“Alright. Now we can get into things. Mild introduction, just so you can know a little itty bit about me. My name is Mike Johnson, you can just call me Mike. I’ve worked at Planned Parenthood as a Practice Nurse for about five years now, and this is my second year coming into schools and teaching sex ed. Mallory actually gave us a great starting point to our first conversation piece. Consent. Now consent’s an incredibly important part of relationships, and it’s a vital part of sex. It needs to be freely given. If you’re with your partner, and you pestered, asked constantly or intimidated them into giving consent, they haven’t given consent.”
Danny began to lean onto his hand, sighing. This was going to be a long class. Mike continued to talk, turning his back to write his points on the board as he spoke. A small piece of folded up paper flew onto Danny’s desk, and he glanced down at it. His name was written on it, and he curiously opened it.
Your girlfriend consented to all sorts of things with me. :P
Danny looked up to see Elliot staring at him. The note wasn’t signed, but the stupid “foreign” exchange student’s smug smirk was all the evidence Danny needed. He flipped Elliot off. Elliot made a peace sign and wiggled his tongue before turning his attention back to the teacher. Danny jerked, as if he was going to stand up, only for Tucker to grab his arm and squeeze it. Wasn’t worth it. 
He settled back into his seat, glaring at Elliot as he silently passed the note to Tucker. Tucker’s eyes scanned it, and he saw his friend write on the back of the note. After a moment, Tucker passed it back.
He’s lying. They kissed ONCE and that’s it. Sam would have told us if they did anything else.
Danny just nodded, but he still exhaled in frustration. He glared at Elliot a bit more before returning his attention to Mike. The man was continuing to write on the board, still talking.
“...People will sometimes just not be in the mood for sex. And it’s not okay to try and persuade them into changing their minds about it. It can be for any number of reasons as to why they don’t want to, and it’s not your job to try and convince them that they do,” Mike continued his talk. 
Danny gasped as he felt his ghost sense going off. Amazing timing, and he groaned a bit to himself as he raised his hand. Mike glanced at him, giving a nod. 
“Can I use the bathroom?” he pleaded. Mike gave a nod, glancing down at a piece of paper.
“Danny, right?” Mike questioned. Danny nodded. “Okay, cool. Yeah, go right ahead. Don’t lollygag.” 
Danny nodded, and he rushed out of the room, skidding into the hallway as he ran down it. It didn’t take long for him to hear the sound of a motorcycle, and he instantly knew that it was Johnny. He glanced around before transforming. He zoomed around the corner, only to nearly smack right into the biker.
Johnny skidded on his bike to stop suddenly, and to Danny’s surprise, he seemed? Happy? To see him? Danny still stayed on high alert. For the most part, Johnny was easy to deal with. He and Danny even struck a small deal, that if Johnny stayed out of trouble, he and Kitty could go to Amity Park whenever and hang out. For them, or rather Johnny by himself, to appear at Casper High, alone, was a sign that he was definitely looking for trouble. 
“Hey, kid! Been looking for ya.”
“Eager to get your butt kicked, huh?” Danny smirked. He began to crack his knuckles, already imagining how nice it was gonna be to just take out all the cringe-induced stress of sex ed out on Johnny.
“Nah, man,” Johnny shook his head. Instead of attacking, or doing anything even threatening, Johnny learned forward on his handles. “Kitty and I heard about what’s going on today. So she wanted to come and talk to your girlfriend about it, and I figured I could take that chance to give you some advice too, bro to bro.”
...What the fuck?
Danny immediately rubbed his face with his hand. What the fuck was this, what the fuck was even his life right now. There was so much to unpack in just that one sentence.
“Okay um….” His voice was suddenly exhausted. “Firstly, I don’t have a girlfriend.”
“You and the spooky chick broke up?” Johnny asked. Danny was surprised by the seemingly legitimate concern in his voice. “Dude, you guys were great together, what happened?”
“We were never together!” Danny snapped. Johnny stared at him curiously. “We’re just best friends.”
“So you typically just make out with your best friends at the beach?” he asked. Danny’s cheeks burned.
“You saw that!? What the hell, how come my ghost sense didn’t go off? Where were you guys?” Danny demanded to know.
“Kitty and I were playing volleyball with some friends. Guess you were too busy making out with your best friend to notice.”
Why did he wake up and get out of bed this morning? Danny needed to see if Clockwork would let him go back in time and kick his own ass. 
“Okay, fine. So what’s it going to take to make you take Kitty and just hit the road?” Danny demanded to know. Johnny paused before shrugging.
“I dunno man, do you like, have any questions?” he asked. Johnny reached into his pocket for a phone. “Or like, I can show you a picture or something of how it works-”
“Absolutely not, put the phone away or I’ll destroy it,” Danny immediately threatened. The last thing he wanted was to either see his ghostly enemies naked, or basically look at porn with them.
“Oh, that’s a good starting point,” Johnny visibly lightened up. Oh no. “So sometimes it’s fun to watch porn with your partner.”
“No, that wouldn’t really work, Sam reads porn,” Danny’s mind flashed back to earlier as he spoke without thinking. 
“Then read it to her, man,” Johnny encouraged. 
“What the fuck, no, we’re not-no!” Danny scowled. 
“Eh, fair.” Johnny scratched his chin as he thought. “Well, nothing gets a girl hornier than wooing her. Romancing her. Get her flowers or something, listen sometimes, and she’ll be down to fuck at a moment’s notice.”
“But like, well...I mean, like, what if I...can’t, ya know?” Danny gestured his hands wildly, cheeks a dark green as he refused to say the actual word. “Rise to the occasion.”
“You’re like, what? Eighteen? Trust me, you’re not gonna have that problem,” Johnny snorted in amusement. Danny glared.
“Anxiety’s a bitch, man. Especially when I’m tired as hell from chasing you fuckers around,” Danny complained with a huff. “How many times will I have to put getting laid on hold because one of you dingdongs decided that you wanna cause havoc at the mall?”
“Just put a sock on the ghost portal or something?” Johnny shrugged.
“Excellent, I’ll find the world’s biggest sock and put it to where the entire fucking Ghost Zone, and as a bonus, my parents, will know that I’m trying to have some alone time,” Danny snapped sarcastically. “Can you just go? I won’t kick your ass if you and Kitty just leave.”
“Yeah, yeah, hall monitor,” Johnny rolled his eyes as he revved his bike up. “I’ll go get Kitty, and we’ll bounce when she’s done. You know girls, they can talk forever.”
Danny rolled his eyes, shooing Johnny away. Johnny saluted him with two fingers before zooming off down the hall. 
A glance around told him that he was safe for now, and he turned human before making a return to his class. He opened the door and slipped inside as quietly as he could. Mike nodded to acknowledge his return, but continued lecturing.
Johnny, Danny mouthed to Tucker as he raised an eyebrow curiously. He nodded. 
“And so, now, we’re gonna take a look at some.” 
Mike held up a bulk pack of condoms. He opened the packaging, and he continued to talk as he traversed the room, dumping a small handful of condoms on each desk as he passed them out. 
“The birth control that most men typically interact with and deal with are condoms. Condoms are basically pouches that cover your penis during sex, and how they work is that they prevent vaginal fluids from contacting semen, which prevents pregnancy and many STDs. And this is true of oral sex, vaginal and anal, so it’s very useful for various sexual practices. As of now, it’s the only type of birth control that also prevents STDs, and it helps work alongside birth control in preventing pregnancy.”
Danny shifted a bit uncomfortably as he looked at the small pile of condoms that had been dumped on his desk. They were brightly colored packaging in a small plastic wrapping, and he hesitantly picked one up.
“Condoms come in many box sizes. Boxes of three tend to be about $2, normally about $15 if you buy in bulk. They’re sold basically everywhere. Drug stores, grocery stories, online, vending machines,” he listed off places. “Planned Parenthood and some community health centers and doctor’s offices will actually give away condoms for free. At our building, you can just go in and get some. But if you go to the store, there’s no ID carding or a prescription needed. They’re normally in the family planning area or the pharmacy part of a store. There’s absolutely no need to be embarrassed or anything about getting them. You’re being very responsible and respectful of yourself and your partner by making sure you’re both protected from pregnancy and STDs.”
Danny glanced to the side of him as Mike continued to pass out condoms.. Tucker had opened one of the condoms and was holding it in his hands, making a small face as he examined it. He hesitantly stuck his tongue out and pressed it to the condom.
“Ew, it’s greasy,” he complained lightly. Danny didn’t comment, simply snorting in amusement as Tucker began to blow air into the condom like a balloon. The tech geek slowly inflated the latex before he finally stopped. Tucker snickered as he saw the end result, tying off the end. He immediately turned to poke Danny with it. Danny snatched it out of his hand, lightly tossing it off to the side. It bounced off the back of a chair before falling to the floor.  
“This is why you don’t need to worry about the free condoms they’ll probably be giving us,” he lightly teased him. Tucker laughed. 
“That’s gay,” Dash’s voice whispered at him. He ignored it. 
“What size do you get?” one of the students questioned aloud. 
“Good question. Condoms are very stretchy, so most fit into a standard size just fine. But if you feel it’s too tight or that it tends to slip off easily, try going for a larger or smaller size,” Mike explained. He had finished passing out condoms before returning to the table at the front. 
“So, now that we know a little bit about condoms, we’re going to do some basic practice with them. Condoms are really effective against pregnancy if used properly. Of course, people make mistakes, but knowing how condoms work and how to use them will help improve how effective they are,” Mike continued. He began to open the second box on the table, and he pulled out a bundle of bananas. He broke one off from the bunch, and he began to travel up and down the rows, passing one out to each student.
“This is stupid,” Dash complained lightly. Danny glanced over at him as he was complaining to his friend. “Paulina’s on the pill, I don’t need this. We can like, just do it whenever, and it’s not gonna matter.” 
“Yeah but you and Paulina might break up,” Kwan told him with a shrug. “It’s high school dude, and there’s lots of hotties in college.”
“Yeah true, I was going to dump her anyway if we were still together before college,” Dash shrugged.
Man, if Sam were here, she’d tear Dash to pieces over those comments. And Sam didn’t even really care that much for Paulina. Danny sighed lightly. What was Sam having to suffer through right now? It couldn’t be as bad as listening to these idiots. 
“Now,” Mike began, holding up his banana in one hand, condom in the other as he reached the front of the classroom once more. “Does everybody have a banana and a condom?” His eyes scanned the room, and he fell upon Danny. He stared at him. “Uh, Danny?”
Danny nodded back at him as he swallowed his bite. The halfa had peeled the banana and had easily eaten half of it by now. 
“Hm?” he asked, mouth half-full. Mike’s mouth twitched in an amused smile.
“We’re not eating the bananas, dude,” he lightly teased. He reached into the box to pull out another. It clearly was not the first time somebody did this. Danny raised an eyebrow before his cheeks flushed. Oh. Mike came back to him with another banana, handing it to him. “Did anybody else decide to have breakfast?” the teacher questioned. Danny’s cheeks flushed harder when nobody else spoke up. “Excellent!” 
“Ya know, Fenton,” Dash’s voice whispered loudly to him, but just low enough that Mike didn’t seem to acknowledge it. Danny’s eyes lazily drifted over to him. “It was pretty gay how you just swallowed so much of that banana.”
“You’d know from personal experience, aye?” Danny muttered back. Dash’s fists clenched tightly.
“I’m not gay, you fucking idiot,” he hissed. 
“I dunno, I heard football can get pretty gay,” Tucker added on. Dash glared. 
“You two are probably the gay ones. Aren’t you two always sneaking around together?” Dash questioned, and he leaned back in his seat so that he could better whisper to him. Danny’s eyes darted to Mike in hopes that he’d notice Dash talking and tell him to shut it for now, but he had become preoccupied with answering a question somebody had brought up. 
“Nah, that’s him and Manson,” Kwan pointed out. He shifted his seat to join in on the conversation. “Have you seen the stuff Fenton keeps in his locker? He and Manson probably get like, super freaky. There’s always all these like ropes and gadgets in there.” 
Danny stared at him with a blank expression, his mind trying to race and figure out what the hell Kwan was referring to. Oh. The Fenton Fisher line. The Jack-o-nine tails. Specter Deflector. Why were so many of his parents' stuff unintentionally weird-looking? He’d never be able to look at any of them the same way again. 
“Yeah, Manson’s probably very freaky. Just like, look at her and tell me she hasn’t done some weird shit,” Dash agreed, and Danny glared at them.
“Dude,” Tucker lightly gasped, and he sounded disgusted. Danny was too. “Sam’s our friend.” 
“Don’t talk about her like that,” Danny chimed in, giving them a Look. He wished he could throw his packet or something at Dash without Lancer or Mike noticing. 
“Or what?” Dash questioned. Danny was cut off from delivering a threat by Mike addressing the class. 
“Alright, so we’re going to walk through together how to put a condom on using the bananas,” Mike spoke. “Firstly, we’re going to check our condoms. They have a long shelf life, but they do expire. So check the expiration date. Also check to make sure the packaging isn’t damaged or has any holes in it.” As he spoke, Mike exaggerated checking the condom. “Cool, it’s good, so let’s open it.”
Danny glanced over at Tucker. His friend had eagerly ripped open a second condom and had completely unrolled it. He stretched it out, holding it close to his face as he examined it. His fingers slipped, and the condom smacked him in the face as it snapped out of his grasp. He yelped in surprise, immediately putting his newly free hand to his face.
“Aw, gross, my face is covered in grease!” he half-yelled. A small wave of snickers and laughs. Mike himself was biting his lip to prevent bursting into laughter himself.
“It’s not grease, just lube,” Mike explained. “Most condoms come pre-lubed to make it easier to put on. Why don’t you go wash it off in the bathroom?”
Tucker’s cheeks flushed dark red as he stood up to exit the room. Danny sighed lightly, but he couldn’t help but snort in amusement. He shifted uncomfortably, now without the comfort of his best friend amongst the others. Geez, is this what Tucker had to go through with his dad earlier? Well, least Tucker didn’t have to sit through Johnny’s weird talk.
Danny stared up at Mike as the man talked, instantly zoning out. This was so boring. When was lunch? It had to be soon, right? Ah fuck, it’s nowhere near lunch...That banana was delicious, but not all that filling. Could he eat the new one? Or would that get him in trouble? Wait, if he put the condom on and took it off, could he eat it then? They didn’t just throw them out, right? That’d be such a waste, and yeah, Tucker said they were kinda greasy, but so was the cafeteria food, and Danny still ate that. Hmm, Mike seemed chill but-
A white slip of paper slid near him, and he glanced at it. It was a note, and he stared at the kid who passed it. He was already looking straight ahead at Mike. The paper had his name on it, and he unfolded it.
Tip for you: Sam likes the grape and strawberry flavored condoms.
His eyes darted up to watch Elliot, who was in turn watching him read. Danny felt anger bubbling, and he resisted the urge to burn the note with ecto-energy, settling for simply crumbling it up into a ball instead. Elliot smirked at him, giving a wave. Danny glanced at Mike. He was distracted. Danny stood and chucked the wadded note at Elliot, hitting him square in the nose before quickly sitting back down. Elliot frowned at him, sticking his middle finger up at him. Danny returned it.
“You okay?” 
Danny jumped as Tucker slipped back into his seat. He exhaled heavily, scratching the back of his head as he just shook it. Now wasn’t a good time to talk about it. 
“He’s just mad about not getting any,” Dash spoke up. God, why was Dash so interested in him today? “Ever since this whole thing, Paulina’s been leaving me hanging. The goth chick’s probably doing the same.”
“I don’t have a girlfriend!” Danny argued, his voice pitching in a panicked annoyance at the implication. Dash rolled his eyes.
“You idiot, you don’t have to have to be boyfriend-girlfriend to be getting some,” Dash sneered. 
“Aren’t you allowed to have guy-girl sleepovers with Sam?” Nathan’s voice spoke up. Danny grinded his teeth in annoyance as he glared at the guy just barely within earshot of their conversation. Not. Helping.
“Whoa, really? My mom would never go for that,” Kwan complained. 
“Damn, Fenton, is that true?” Dash asked.
“Y-yeah, but it’s not like it’s just Sam and I, Tucker’s always there,” Danny said. He could feel his cheeks growing darker and darker. 
“Ah yeah, Foley’s kind of a buzzkill,” Dash nodded understandingly, Kwan mirroring it. 
“Tucker’s not a buzzkill, he’s our best friend!” Danny argued.
“I mean, he’s pretty pervy, maybe he just watches?” Kwan suggested. 
“Hey!” Tucker finally spoke up, giving a glare. He then unintentionally let out a sly smirk towards Danny. “But uh, ya know. Not sure what he gets up to when I’m sleeping.”
“Tucker!” Danny hissed in horror. That fucking traitor! Tucker gave a light snicker. “You know we’re just friends, you asshole!”
“Friends don’t make out with each other,” Tucker pointed out. Danny heard Dash’s chair scooting towards them in order to listen in. He ignored the jock, glaring at Tucker.
“It was only like six times.”
“Six!?” Tucker stared at him, jaw agape. Danny did the mental math, and froze. 
“Five,” he corrected himself.
“That’s still three more times that I don’t know about!” Tucker exclaimed. 
“What are you two doing, Fenton?” Dash asked him.
“Fuck off!” Danny hissed. 
“He just can’t resist,” Elliot’s voice teased. Danny did a double take at seeing Elliot sitting closer to them. When did he move? Obviously when Mike wasn’t looking. He now sat within hearing distance of everything. “I mean, Sam’s an awesome kisser.”
“Eh, she was kinda shitty,” Dash shrugged. Danny felt an emotional whiplash. What? Oh. Right. Ember’s concert. That felt like ages ago. Wait, was that even supposed to count? That didn’t count, right? 
“We kissed before, she wasn’t bad,” Tucker tried to argue. What!? Danny felt that ping of immediate jealousy. When the hell did Tucker? Oh, nevermind. That flour sack thing. He remembered now. Tucker had told him about that. Something about a bro code. Danny didn’t really get it at the time, but he always respected the honesty. 
Elliot let out a low whistle.
“Sam’s quite adventurous,” he commented. Danny shot him a Look.
“Shut up, fakie,” he scowled. Elliot returned the nasty look before turning frontwards in his seat. 
“Lemme guess, you kissed her too?” Danny bitterly asked Kwan. He shook his head.
“No, we’re just best friends,” Kwan explained. He grinned. “We go to that poetry slam thing. I’ve actually never done better in English.”
Just best friends. Wasn’t that what Danny was with Sam? Then again, best friends don’t really cuddle up on the couch when their other best friend is tutoring, and that cuddle session turns into light kissing until one of the best friend’s parents catch them and kick you out. That wasn’t really something he ever did with Tucker. Or even wanted to or thought about. What was it then? They never really talked about it. Just about how much it sucked that he wasn’t allowed back in the Manson house for a month because of the whole thing. Her mom’s footsteps were like a damn ninja’s. He still wasn’t convinced she didn’t float or randomly teleported there. She was normally so loud in announcing her presence. 
“Wait, so if you guys have both kissed Sam, does that mean you guys kiss too?” Kwan’s question snapped Danny out of his thoughts.
“No!” Danny immediately half-yelled. Mike looked up from the front of the room, staring at the group.
“Is there a problem?” he asked. Danny sunk in his chair.
“No,” he replied. Mike stared for a moment before shrugging it off, and he continued his lecture. 
“I’m not bi,” Tucker whispered at the two jocks. “I like girls only, so don’t tell people that stuff. It’s hard enough to find a date.”
“Dude you guys are always doing gay things together,” Dash replied.
“Like fucking what? We don’t go running around naked together slapping each other’s butts like football,” Danny snapped. 
“I can’t even begin to count the number of times we caught you twinks in a literal closet together,” Dash snorted.
“You know what a twink is, Dash?” Elliot spoke up, raising an eyebrow. For the first time all day, Dash looked genuinely taken aback and unsure of how to even respond. “Sounds like you’re the actual gay one here. Must be from sniffing all those jock straps.”
“Listen, you fake European-wannabe,” Dash growled, but he was cut off unintentionally by Mike.
“So, is anybody having any trouble? Having any questions?” Mike wondered. 
A gasp, and light blue smoke. Danny tensed up, and he shot his hand up. 
“Mike, can I use the restroom?” he half-yelled before the teacher could even call on him. The Planned Parenthood rep stared at him a bit before giving a light nod. 
“Jeez, Fenton, you sure need to pee all the time,” Dash commented. Danny glared at him as he snapped to his feet, rushing towards the door, only for Mike’s hand to reach on him.
“Danny, this is the second time you’ve gone to the bathroom in the past two hours,” he whispered to him. Danny flinched in worry. “Are things okay?” 
“I’m f-fine,” Danny said quickly, and Mike removed his hand. “I just really have to pee, small bladder.”
“I’ve seen this before,” Mike’s voice lowered a bit to prevent the other students from listening in. “This isn’t my first class, and I know that it’s a sensitive topic, so if you want to take a break and have a more one on one lesson later, please reach out.”
Danny flushed dark red, and he simply nodded.
“Y-yeah, yeah,” Danny said, brushing him off a bit as he quickly opened the door and rushed out. 
He scrambled out of the room and down the hall, straight into the boys’ room. The swinging door barely closed fully before a flash of light overwhelmed the bathroom, and Phantom came flying out soon after. He flew down the hallway, scanning for any signs of ghosts. 
16 notes · View notes
stylinsonlibrary · 6 years
Note
Hey do you have any good punk harry and like feminine-ish louis stories ??
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PUNK HARRY FIC REC
(Your Bangs Are Curled, Your Lashes Twirled) And Still, The World Is Cruel (2k)
The one where Louis wears a dress for Halloween because he fucking feels like it, thanks, and Harry's wearing kitty ears when he nearly kills the first kid that tries to do something about it.
Just a One Night Stand (3k)
He heard Harry hum then he felt his hands on his waist, his thumbs digging into his skin. The grip he had on his waist was so unbelievebly strong, and Louis couldn't wriggle out of his grasp. But maybe he didn't want to get away.
Maybe he wanted this.
Or where Louis is a nerdy twink and gets fucked by a punk named Harry in the bathroom of a club
Ballet In A Field Of Daises (3k)
"It's a pleasure to meet you Louis. Would you, um, would you mind going out sometime?" Harry asked, playing with the earring in his earlobe.
Louis beamed, "I'd love to. On one condition."
Harry raised an eyebrow, "And what would that be?"
"You have to be at my ballet recital next Tuesday," Louis replied, looking giddy.
Harry smiled, "I'd love to. I've never been to one, but for you I'd make an exception."
You Have Nice Eyes (4k)
Harry is kinda the school’s bad boy, and Louis is the new kid. A lunch room staring, a bloody lip and some pretty eyes later somehow they both end up with their pants off.
or a kind of punk!harry high school au where Louis is the new kid, meets Harry, and shit goes down.
oops, i like you (5k)
He thrives in the attention, at the knowledge he makes these boys with their tattooed dicks and pierced whatevers, so hot and bothered. These boys with their confident smirks and broad shoulders and hands, touching Louis wherever they can. Louis reduces them all to a wet, moaning, mess, every time.
Usually he doesn’t see those guys again. It’s not generally part of the plan.
But then Harry tightens his grip on the back of Louis’ neck and Louis ducks his head to taste the sweat beading under Harry’s chin, kissing the ink curling up Harry’s neck, then kissing his way down to get his mouth on the god forsaken nipple piercings. He listens to the way Harry breathes his name, and for the first time silently asks, Can I keep him?
Twenty five miles over the limit (6k)
Louis's a bit reckless with driving over the speed limit, and Harry doesn't exactly abide by rules that says he can't spray paint his art where he wants. They both get arrested for a night and put into a holding cell.
There’s Nothing In This World To Fix Us (6k)
Harry still holds the school record for most detentions in his high school career, Liam doesn't want any drama, Louis is all about drama, Zayn draws roses, and Niall's braces and spot in marching band gets him all the girls.
Or, a Breakfast Club AU where Harry's a delinquent, Liam's an athlete, Louis is a prep, and Niall's a nerd, and Zayn's an artist.
Sun-kissed Hurricane, Perfect Storm (7k)
Harry is the quiet kid in the back of his statistics class who writes a lot and dreams about Louis’ cheekbones . Louis needs a statistics tutor ASAP before he flunks and the quiet kid in the back of the class seems like a good choice. Harry wants to help Louis however he can and Louis wants to see how much he can make Harry blush.
I Painted A Scene That Lit The Stars For Me (10k)
Harry still remembers the first tattoo he got...
Drawn In (11k)
Punk Harry meets restricted Louis and things sort of explode.
Take a Look at the Stars and Feel the Rumble of my Engine (16k)
“One day I’ll get you your very own tiara, princess.” He puts on his own helmet and slips down the visor. Louis mimics him.
“Still not a princess.” Louis mumbles as he finally climbs on behind Harry, using his shoulder for support and trying not to think about how firm it is under his grip as he swings a leg over.
“Sure you are,” Louis can hear the smile in his voice as he says it, “Now wrap your arms around my waist and hold tight.”
“I know what to do.” Louis grumbles, moving his arms to they are resting on the top of Harry’s hips and his hands are on his abdomen. Do not think about the abs.
“I know,” Louis can tell he’s smirking, “I just like saying it.”
Or The one where Louis gets incredibly drunk and Harry is the one that finds him. They slowly fall in love.
It’s In The Love. (18k)
AU in which Harry is sorta punk and never stops staring at Louis.
Nicotine (32k)
"We're two different types of people, Liam. He likes sex and drugs, I like theater and tea. Trust me, we'd never date." Except they would, they do, and neither of them plans on letting go anytime soon.
"Just because you can get me hard doesn't mean I like you," Louis whispered. The fact was, he didn't like Harry right now, not at all. Not even a bit.
"Yeah, yeah," Harry murmured, his breath fanning over Louis' cock as he spoke. "You done telling me how much you hate me so I can suck you off?"
Can I Make It Any More Obvious? (35k)
"I don't have a good past. With boys. I've dated some crap guys who've done terrible things to me and I've…I've done some crazy shit with some guys, and Niall and Liam have always pulled me through, they've always had my best interests in mind. And they…they don't think that you're good for me." Louis finished, sighing and looking down at the tiles. "And the least I can do is listen to them, because I really do adore you, but if I get with you and I fuck things up, like I tend to do, then I'll lose their trust and yours, and I don't want that. I can't--I can't deal with that. It'd kill me."
[AU where Louis does ballet and Harry is the epitome of everything Louis' friends want him to stay away from]
Just a Number (49k)
Louis may or may not fall in love with his arch enemy's (aka his own brother) best friend, who just so happens to be in college.
guardian angels (series; 2 works, 56k)
Beauty Behind The Madness. (59k)
Harry doesn't meet the worlds perspective of looks, causing him to be judged every time he leaves his house. He never lets it get to him, because he knows that when he gets home at the end of the day he has the most beautiful little girl waiting for him.
So with just her and the lovely old lady down the hall who babysits her, Harry thinks his life is good enough for him.
Of course it all changes when the apartment across from him gets new attendants.
Your Name Is Tattooed On My Heart (86k)
Louis is ready to find the love of his life, but first he has to stop falling for the punk rocker next door.
Baby Heaven’s in your Eyes (120k)
They couldn’t be more different if they tried. Louis Tomlinson is 17 years old and in his last year of the most prestigious private school in Doncaster. Everyone who attends his school knows him thanks to his incredibly rich family, sassy attitude and gorgeous girlfriend, Eleanor Calder. If there’s one thing that completely annoys him, it’s that there is a poor community college right across the street.
Harry Styles is 19 years old, and (once again) in his last year of college. He goes to community college in Doncaster. He never shows up to classes and if he actually bothers to, he’s either high or drunk; sometimes both. His skin is littered with tattoos and if there’s one thing he absolutely hates, it’s the snobby students attending the private school right across from his.
Or a sixth form!AU where Harry is the fucked up bad boy with too many problems, Louis is the perfect rich boy with too much money and their schools are right across from each other. They meet at a party and that’s the last (and maybe the only) thing they need.
Turning From Praise (128k)
Louis has had a strict Christian upbringing that he never realized he resented until he meets Harry Styles, a boy who lives to rebel and doesn’t give a damn what anyone else thinks. But the better he gets to know Harry, the more he begins to realize that maybe Harry does care. And maybe “the children who God forgot” are closer to God than the devout will ever be.
Not all of these fics have Feminine Louis but they do have Punk Harry/Non-Punk Louis.
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atlanxic · 7 years
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ok so i actually have an extensive arc-v/zexal crossover university au that i’ve talked a lot about on my private twitter and on discord but i think it’s time to put it all on tumblr. i wanted to make this all one post but i actually feel like it’s too much for that? so here’s part one of..... five or so?
yuuto, shun, and ruri lived in the same apartment complex as children, theyve known each other literally forever.
in middle school, yuuto & shun both discover hardcore/punk music and spend a couple years being kind of awkward and terrible about it until high school hits and they kind of level out. ruri teases them a lot for liking that awful racket but eventually she gets into it too, mostly because her and shun are kind of inseparable for quite some time. the three of them go to the local shitty music venue just about every weekend. for the first year or so ruri insists shes going to keep them out of trouble but like i said, she gets more into the music after a while.
shun and yuuto both mosh, shun probably more frequently than yuuto. they show up to school with bruises pretty often and rumours are started that they get in fights a lot or that theyre involved in a gang. there are also rumours that theyre dating, which dont go over very well, and result in them getting in actual fist fights a couple times. they try dating for like... 3 months in grade 7, and then decide that its weird and they work better as friends.
yuuto wears his hair in a mohawk for about a year before switching to the spiky mess we know and love. towards the end of middle school, they meet kaito at a prog-rock concert, all four of them pressed against the front rails together kaito and yuuto hit it off immediately, and exchange phone numbers after the show. shun is immensely suspicious. they text a lot, and then they start hanging out, and then they start going out. shun threatens to beat kaito up, kaito is fine with it, yuuto is not. etc.
meanwhile, ruri and sayaka meet in class. it doesn't even occur to shun to be suspicious of her until he catches them making out. he yells about it, sayaka is understandably frightened. ruri tells him off for scaring her girlfriend. she stays angry at him for longer than she has before. he eventually gives in and apologizes to both of them, but in a kind of dickish way.
yuuto and kaito break up towards the beginning of 11th grade. neither of them are upset about it, they stay friends. it was mostly because kaito felt like he needed to focus more on school, now that he's getting into college prep-level courses. yuuto cries about it once, and it takes several hours to convince shun that violence would be neither appropriate nor helpful.
all four of them move to a different city for college. sayaka goes to school in the town they grew up in. her and ruri stay in touch, but after half a year they decide that the long distance thing isn't working out for them. they still hang out when ruri and shun go back for the holidays, and its fairly bittersweet.
yuuto shun & ruri dont realize that kaito is going to the same school as them until all four of them are present at a queer alliance meet & greet. shun glares at him across the room for a while before yuuto notices he's there and goes over to say hello like a decent person. yuuto and kaito immediately hit it off again. theyre both kind of "fuck you grew into yourself really well im Gay."
immm gonna say that in first year, yuuto & shun live in the dorms together. they eventually decide the res life is not for them but. apartment hunting when youre like 18 and moving out for the first time is a bit much, so dorms it is.
anyway, shun catches yuuto and kaito making out in their shared dormroom like 3 fucking days after the meet and greet. kaito's expression is one of fear and conveys that he knows full well that shun is 2 seconds from beating him up. yuuto is kinda pissed off about it. yuuto and shun have a long conversation that night about how protective shun is. they fall asleep in each other's arms.
kaito avoids them for a little while, but the next time they see him, shun makes a genuine apology. yuuto and kaito start dating again a few weeks later. ruri is surprised and delighted about it. ruri ends up dormed with rin in first year.
they get along reasonably well, but they dont get close until rin accidentally lets slip that she's gay, and then ruri is like "oh thank god, me too." the context is probably: that yuugo visits them like basically every other day, and is Really Obviously In Love with rin, and rin's affectionate with him, so ruri just kind of assumes theyre dating. and at one point is like, do you want me to go somewhere else so you guys can make out, i could hang out with my brother tonight its nbd. yuugo blushes bright red and is like aaaaa its not like that, like, exactly like he does in canon. and rin's like “lmao im gay. i mean. what.”
ruri probably ids as pan? but anyway, shes like "ohhhh cool me too.” they both kind of stare at each other while this new info sinks in, and then yuugo says something and the moment is broken.
this is still a bit before yuugo's gay crisis
[later, during yuugo's gay crisis about yuuya] [rin] yuugo you had a crush on a boy in /middle school/ [yuugo] no i didnt i had a crush on you [rin] you used to complain to me about how hot he was like every lunch break [yuugo] that doesn't mean anything? [rin] obviously it does? how are you only realizing this now
ruri discovers that rin's been wanting to go to queer alliance meetings but has been too shy about it, so she drags her along. and someone mistakes them for yuzu and selena. idk who it would be..... sawatari maybe?
sawatari is like, Flaming Gay, a legitimate twink despite iding as bi.
anyway theyre like, thats not us, youre mistaken, and sawatari, instead of fucking off, is like, "holy fuck you have to meet them, you look so much the same it's eery." sawatari drags them through the party for like 20 minutes before actually finding yuzu and selena, and he's like "look i told you."
and all four of them are kind of like "holy fuck???" they get a selfie together, its not very good because the lighting is terrible, and they spend the rest of the evening hanging out.
yuzu and selena had a class together and hit it off immediately, theyre already dating. theyre a bit surprised to learn that ruri and rin /aren't/ dating. rin blushes at the suggestion and gets raised eyebrows all around. the four of them become fast friends and start getting lunch together and studying together on a regular basis.
ruri and rin meet yuuya through them, and because yuuya is friends with Everyone, they become friends as well. which sets the stage for yuuya and yuugo meeting, and yuugo's consequent gay crisis.
shun, ruri, and yuuto as pakistani immigrants, they arrived when they were very very young but they get a lot of shit for it anyway, especially ruri, who wears a hijab.
i figure the commons would be mostly latinx/mixed. so like, yuugo, rin, and shinji are all latinx. i rlly like the concept of black crow with a bleached-orange hi-top fade and subtle freckles. yuuya, yuzu, and gongenzaka can pprrobably be white? dennis could be ethnically jewish & light-skinned. fusion dimension crew are mostly japanese, so sora, yuuri, and selena. i.. am not really sure about reiji? following the theme i guess white/japanese mixed. tsukikage is japenese & immigrated like within his memory rather than a few generations back, he's bilingual. jack is latino and white-passing.
i like the concept of shun as a veterinary student, partly because i think he'd follow his interest in birds if things hadn't gone horribly wrong and partly because i find the idea of this edgy asshole in scrubs really funny. yuuto takes social work and ends up with crow as a teacher. yuuya, dennis, sawatari, and sora are all drama majors. yuuri is in botany. reiji is a law major, as well as being on the debate team and the student council. he never fuckign sleeps. shun also joins the debate team, and they do Not get along, but since debate team is the yelling hobby anyway, thats fine. yuzu is in the music program. selena is in poli-sci. yuugo stays in engineering. i dont, know about the rest of everyone.
conceptually, this is a north-eastern reasonably liberal college town, featuring two colleges and a trade school. one college is for the arc v kids, the other one will eventually be populated with zexal kids when i get to know them. kaito starts in zexal school and transfers at the beginning of second year. everyone is in first year rn except reiji and tsukikage, who are in second year, and also are dorming together, and also are gay.
so now that thats all set up!! back to the plot!!
ruri and rin meeting yuzu and selena happens a couple weeks after ruri and sayaka break up. selena hears about it and is like, hey if you need a rebound i can hook you up with someone, and ruri is like. "i feel like itd be disrespectful to date someone else before im over sayaka, ill stay single for a while." she never actually completely gets over sayaka, but she does eventually get enough emotional distance to move on. every time she goes home for the holidays they have awkward not-quite-gay moments.
much like in sfu, sawatari is loaded and hosts house parties whenever his father is away on business trips.
once the 4 girls are hanging out on a regular basis, they all sort of get to know each other's orbital boys. like rin and ruri get introduced to yuuya and get to know sawatari better. yuuya's goal is to be friends with absolutely everyone, and they make good progress on it.
yuzu and selena get to meet yuugo. yuugo is starry-eyed at all four of them, but alas, they are all too gay for him. at one point selena slaps him in the face and he spends like the next two weeks thinking about it lmao
likewise, they all get to meet shun. shun immediately decides that he is going to protect all of them. rin finds it kind of cute, yuzu finds it kind of weird, selena is outright offended about it. they get along a lot better with yuuto, since yuuto is just, easier to get along with. he joins their lunch dates once in a while, as does yuuya.
selena and yuuri met in their high school gsa and relentlessly gossip about everyone they meet. selena introduces yuuri to the rest of the girls exactly once, it does not go well. probably kye gives them all backhanded compliments. shun hears about this from ruri later and decides that yuuri is his enemy.
the first time yuuya and yuugo meet, its because the girls have invited both of them to lunch. yuuya introduces themself with a firm handshake and a wink. yuuya flirts a bit throughout the meal, as they tend to do. yuzu tells yuugo after the fact like, "dont mind them, theyre always like that." yuugo tries not to think about it much.
the second time they meet is at one of sawatari's giant house parties. yuuya, being slightly inebriated, is even more flirtacious than usual. yuugo gets it into his head that this is some kind of challenge, and refuses to back down from yuuyas advances until theyre in a closet together and yuuyas hand is up his shirt.
the next gay he visits rin to have a gay crisis. ruri politely sees herself out so they can talk.
i want to say shun is having a similar crisis about having come very close to having a one night stand with reiji. not because it was gay but because he hates the guy.
rin is exasperated but understanding, she rubs yuugo's back and calls him a pathetic baby while he whines. by the end of their conversation, yuugo has accepted that he's bi, and additionally, that making out is Great and he should do more of it. rin is slightly worried and gives him a safe sex talk, he yells and covers his ears during the entire thing.
meanwhile, shun is like "i fucking hate that guy why was it so satisfying to bite him" and ruri is like "bro i love you but thats way tmi, please do not tell me about your sadistic hatesex kink or whatever the fuck it is youre trying to convey." yuuto, also present, is like "i cant believe you made out with that asshole, and you still have the nerve to get angry at basically anyone i kiss for no fucking reason." shun swears up and down that it will not happen again, and also says that he has already apologized several times for being possessive about both of them, please let him live it down.
(it absolutely does happen again.)
(the second time they actually do go all the way, it is the best sex of shun's life, and he's upset about it.)
[yuuto voice] you have a Problem, why cant you date someone decent and have vanilla sex like the rest of us
rin slowly develops a huge crush on ruri. when she tells yuugo about it, hes like "yeah she's really pretty i completely understand."
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kpopismylife4ever · 4 years
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Pretend Boyfriend Vocal Line
Seokjin
Carrie and Seokjin had been friends for the last three years and there was one thing Seokjin never understood. Carrie never looked remotely interested in dating. He tried to take her to group dates, but she’d only ever talk to him or the other girls. He tried to introduce her to Namjoon and Hoseok, both befriended her, as did the others, but neither of them were interested in Carrie .
Carrie was gorgeous! Seokjin didn’t feel anything special with her over a friendship. She was like his little sister that he wanted to be happy and he thought that setting her up with another guy would be the key.
One day, Carrie and Seokjin were out at a mall food court when Seokjin noticed a man eyeing Carrie . He smiled slyly as he looked at Carrie . “Look, what do you think about him?”
Lyla took a large bite of her hamburger as she looked in the direction to where he nudged his head. She grimaced, “Nahh twinks” she said with a mouth full of food. Carrie swallowed the food and wiped her mouth, “I don’t know why you keep thinking I want to da–”
An arm touched Carrie shoulder and she froze. “Hey, you wanna go walk the mall with me? Maybe your cousin will let you out of his sight for a bit.”
Carrie’s face twisted and Seokjin could see the sickly look she had. He cleared his throat as he reached over and moved the man’s arm. “I’d prefer it if you didn’t touch my girlfriend.” Carrie gave him a startled look.
The man held up his arms, “My bad man, thought you were cousins. You have a good date.”
He left and Carrie and Seokjin laughed. “Cousins?” Carrie wiped her eyes as she laughed harder. “I’m not even Asian, man.”
Jin let out one of his infamous windshield laugh, “But really, why didn’t you like that guy? He seemed pretty nice.”
Carrie tried to calm her laughs as she looked at Jin, but she bursted, “Dude, I’m gay… Everyone but you seem to have figured that out.”
Jin sat there in a silent shock, “So… I’ve been setting you up with the wrong people… I will find you a great girlfriend then!” He shook his head not believing he had missed all the signs. No wonder his group members weren’t interested in her.
Jimin
Mercy was out at the park with her headphones in her ears. She looked down at her camera and the different scenic images she had captured as she waited for her best friend, Jimin. It was a cold winter day, but with the sun out and the snow still heavy on the ground, Mercy saw it as an opportunity to do a random informal photo-shoot using Jimin who readily agreed.
As she flipped through the images, a hand covered the screen as it waved to catch her attention. She jumped thankful she had put the camera around her neck as it left her hands and hit her chest. “Damn it, Jimin, I told yo–” She yanked her headphones out as she began to snap at the man she thought was Jimin. However, as she looked up at him, she could tell he was no Jimin.
The man was taller, but he had the same build as Jimin. He had a flirty smile on his lips and there was a glint in his eyes that screamed fuck boi. “Sorry bout that. I was just wondering if you could tell me how to get to Myeongdong? I’m new here.”
“Yea sure” she pulled out her phone and the man moved to her side. “We’re close to Seoul Station, so if you take the underground metro it’ll be two stops.”
“I appreciate it” he grinned. He licked his bottom lip as he reached out to shake her hand. “I’ll be in for a couple of weeks. Maybe you can show me around? Foreigners gotta stick together.” He eyed her, “You can show me where all the fun places to go especially at night.”
Mercy gave him a forced smile, “I can’t help you there. I’m not a night life girl. I’m sure there will be some people who can show you around.” She stepped back from him, “I should get going though, so have a good trip.”
As she began to leave, the man reached out, “Hey wait!”
However instead of grabbing Mercy, his hand hit a bulky jacket sleeve. Jimin stood between them as his arms crossed and he looked at the man with a disinterested gaze. “You should probably leave now.”
The man glared at him, “I wasn’t talking to you.”
His eyebrow rose, “Yea? But I’m talking to you. My girlfriend doesn’t want you near.” He shooed him with his hand.
“Then she can speak for herself.”
Jimin let out a chuckle before he turned back to Mercy, “You wanna answer him?” She said nothing as she shook her head and pulled Jimin’s sleeve. “There’s your answer, so piss off.” He wrapped his arm around Mercy’s shoulders and led her off inside the park. Jimin dropped the facade when they were far enough and let out a breath, “Holy crap, did you see how tall that dude was?”
Mercy laughed as she picked up her camera, “Well thanks to you, Mr. Boyfriend, I was saved from another fuck boy.”
“All in a day’s work for Mr. Boyfriend” he placed his fists on his hips as he struck a hero pose. “Now, where does our damsel want to take these pictures?” With a large smile, Mercy took his hand and guided him through the park to the locations she wanted to take the photos.
Taehyung
Sara as out in the meet up point where she waited for Taehyung, her best friend and crush. She had her head down in her phone as she played a game when a voice she hated sounded.
“Hey love.” She cringed and her eyes rolled at the sound of her ex’s voice. She paid it no mind and pretended he wasn’t near her. “ Sara, hey babe…”
Her head shot up realizing the girl he had called out to was her. Her face was clear of any emotion as she looked at him, “Can I help you, Jungwoo?”
He grinned as he threw out his arms to hug her. She side stepped out of his line of vision as he went to hug her to only get air. “After all this time, you’re still so cold to me?” He whined. “How many times do I have to say I’m sorry… That bitch meant nothing to me.”
“I could careless who you sleep with. We’re not together and I’m happier without you.”
Jungwoo wore a cocky smile, “You, the neediest girl in the world, are happy being single? As if.”
“Who said I was single?” She commented back. She silently cursed as she knew she was digging herself in a hole, but she didn’t seem to stop her mouth. “I’m with Taehyung. You remember him” her lips twitched, “The one you were sure wanted to get with me while we dated… Well, turns out you were right.”
“I don’t believe it” her ex scoffed. “We both know that Taehyung would never date you. Maybe sleep with you and add you to his list of sluts, but date?” He chuckled. Sabrina bit her lip as she knew there wasn’t much she could do to sway him. “Why don’t we ditch the charade and I can take you on a date to show you how sorry I really am?”
“I already told you, I don’t care who you sleep with. We broke up a year ago. I’m with Tae now” she lied. Her ex gripped her wrist tightly and she saw how his eyes darkened in rage, “Let. Me. Go.” Her voice cracked as she tried to pull his hand off hers.
Taehyung grinned when he saw Sara at the meet up point, but it quickly fell. He saw the bastard that broke his crush’s heart holding her by the wrist. “Hey Rina!”
Sara’s   ears perked and she felt her ex’s grip lax. She took the chance to pull away from him and rush to Taehyung, “Babe, you’re here!” She threw her arms around his neck and startled him, “Sorry for this…” She whispered in his ear before she leaned up and pressed her lips to his.
Taehyung didn’t think twice as he kissed her back passionately. His hands encircled her waist. His head tilted deepening the kiss. Sara gasped at the sudden shift and he took the opportunity to slip his tongue in her mouth.
Sara broke the kiss first as her lungs screamed for air. Her eyes widened as she covered her mouth in shock. She looked back to see her ex long gone. “Jeez, what was that all about? I was just going for a small kiss.”
Taehyung licked his lips still tasting hers on his. “It’s your own fault you kissed me first. I’ve wanted to kiss you for years” his eyes trained on her as she looked back at him.
She felt her face burn as she let out an awkward cough, “Well, I definitely didn’t mind it.” She bit her lip which only made Taehyung crave to kiss her again.
He smirked, “You want another one?” Though she didn’t answer, the bashful way she acted was more than enough of an answer for him. His thumb swiped her bottom lip as he fought the urge to kiss her again. He reached for her hand and took it in his own, “How about this… I take you out on a date. You like it and I’ll kiss you again.”
She brushed her hair behind her ear, “I’d like that.”
With his large box smile, Taehyung laughed in relief as he led Sara to a cafe, one he had always wanted to take her. Their fingers intertwined and never parted the entire way to the cafe.
Jungkook
Jungkook was protective to his best friend, Callie. She was like a little sister to him. He was the one who got police involved when Callie’s abusive ex poured coffee on her in a cafe and when that same ex broke down her door. Jungkook refused to let that man get away with hurting Callie and he took extra steps to keep her protected.
He helped Callie get a different job, move to a safer more secure complex, and got her a new phone and phone number as the police never held her ex in custody for long.
It had been a year and a half since Callie last saw her ex and she felt like the likelihood of running into him as big as Seoul was slim. She sent Jungkook a quick text to let him know she was going out for a walk before she headed out the door and to the darkness of the night. She pulled her jacket tighter against her as she made her way out the alleyway from her apartment and onto the main street. She sucked in the crisp fall air as she made her way out to the local park.
Once there, she felt her phone vibrate and when she pulled it out she saw Jungkook’s ID name. She answered it and pressed her phone to her ear, “Heeeeyyyy” she smiled.
“Don’t you hey me. Why are you going out this late?” Jungkook asked with a older brother authoritative tone. “I’ll be there in a minute, hyung!” He called out. “Where are you?”
“Are you still at work? Why are you calling me?”
“Don’t change the subject” he hissed. “You shouldn’t be out this late. Especially not alone.”
She leaned on the rail as she gazed at the people on the basketball court start to leave. “I’m fine, Jungkook” she shrugged. “I’m at the park near my place.”
“Callie!” A growl came from behind her at a distance.
She stilled at the voice, “Callie, who was that?” Jungkook asked in a panic.
She turned to see her ex at the entrance just feet away. “Jungkook…” She let out a whimper, “He’s here…”
He stomped towards her as she back away in a panic. “Who the fuck are you talking to, you bitch?” He snatched her phone from her. She tried to take the moment to run, but he grabbed her by the hair and yanked her back. “Did I tell you to leave, fucking useless bitch?” He threw her phone to the pavement when he saw Jungkook’s name. “So you’re sleeping with Jungkook, huh?” She cried as he pulled her hair tighter. “I asked you a question!”
The sound of tires screech didn’t get her ex to let up as he raised a hand to her. However, before he could strike her, he was punched in the face. His hand untangled from her hair and another set of arms pulled her away from him.
Jungkook stood there ready to strike again as his jaw clenched. His eyes were dark with rage, “Who the fuck do you think you are touching my girlfriend like that?”
Her ex stumbled as he held his jaw. He let out a low chuckle, “Your girl, huh? I always knew she was a fucking slu–”
Jungkook didn’t hesitate as he swung once more at her ex, but he dodged it. He stood protectively in front of Callie as her ex stepped back. Though he could lay a hand on Callie, he was never one to try another man. Jungkook held up his fist to intimidate her ex, “I’ll give you three seconds to get the fuck out of our sights or I swear next swing, I won’t miss. Don’t approach my girlfriend again.” Her ex scrambled from the location and Jungkook let out a breath. He ruffled his hair as he turned his attention to Callie, “Did he hurt you?” He cooed as he looked at her disheveled hair. A cry bubbled from her lips before she broke into a sob. Jungkook took her into his arms and held onto her tightly, “It’s okay… You’re safe now.”
Once she calmed down, Jungkook led her to the car where Jin waited. “How’d you get here so fast?” She whispered as she climbed inside.
Jin started the car as Jungkook climbed in the back with her, “Our photo-shoot was right up the road. I was just going to run here, but since we were going to go home, Jin hyung decided to drive me here. Do you want to grab some clothes from your place first?” He asked. She gave him a questioning look and he let out an exasperated sigh. “You really think I’m letting you go back to your apartment with that fucker–”
“Language!” Jin hissed.
Jungkook rolled his eyes, “You’re staying at our place until I can find you a different apartment.” She went to protest, but he was having none of it, “This isn’t up for debate. Until– he gets arrested again, you won’t feel safe at your place, am I right?” She nodded in defeat. “Hyung, we’re going to swing by her place and get her clothes, okay?” Jin let out a sound as he pulled away from the park and drove to her place.
The ride to BTS’s apartment was quiet and Callie was curled against Jungkook the entire time. She felt safe in his arms. He had let her know that they would go to the police tomorrow morning to file a report because he knew she wasn’t up to it that night.
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lodelss · 5 years
Link
Soraya Roberts | Longreads | February 2019 | 10 minutes (2,500 words)
At the end of An Open Secret, the 2015 documentary by Amy J. Berg about child sex abuse in Hollywood, a card reads: “The filmmakers emphasize that this is not a gender based issue. We chose to tell these specific stories, but they are representations of a greater issue that affects both boys and girls.” It was an odd thing to read after watching a 99-minute film — one that could not secure a distributor and was self-released on Vimeo — in which no girls were mentioned. Whether or not it was intentional, the statement had the effect of equating the two genders, erasing any nuance that might exist in a male victim versus a female victim. It leaves the impression that the abuse we predominantly talk about — which, in our current climate, targets girls and women — is the standard. So the way girls and women are mistreated and how they react to this mistreatment is how all of us do. The fallout from Harvey Weinstein and Bill Cosby and R. Kelly is the fallout from Michael Jackson and Kevin Spacey and Bryan Singer and Gary Goddard.
Maybe it’s the numbers — according to Dr. Richard Gartner, author of Betrayed as Boys: Psychodynamic Treatment of Sexually Abused Men, twice as many girls (one in three) as boys (one in six) are sexually abused. So girls take priority. But it’s more than that. Rape culture means that when you hear the allegations against Roman Polanski, Woody Allen, Jeffrey Epstein, Larry Nassar, you are surprised at the scope of their actions, but not at the gender of their victims. When you see a Hollywood party overflowing with teen girls carted in to appease a room full of grey-haired execs, it is status quo. Casting couches have been around forever, right? But a party full of teen boys, what the hell does that mean?! Maybe my perception of these male-dominated parties is just skewed because I haven’t normalized male sexuality, so when I see it, it appears abnormal. “To me it seems like there is an overrepresentation of young boys being abused, but that can’t be right?” I hear myself waffle while interviewing Anne Henry, co-founder of BizParentz, an advocacy group for child actors. But her response is immediate. “No, it is right,” she says. “It’s not just your perception.”
* * *
The World Health Organization defines child sex abuse as “the involvement of a child in sexual activity that he or she does not fully comprehend and is unable to give informed consent to, or for which the child is not developmentally prepared, or else that violate the laws or social taboos of society.” Here “child” may as well be “girl.” A study of 40 countries from earlier this year found that only five of them — Cambodia, Kenya, Tanzania, Uganda, and South Korea — “collect prevalence data for boys related to child sexual exploitation.” The Economist Intelligence Unit also found that the laws and support services are predominantly directed towards girls. “Often this is bundled up into an issue of violence against women, and therefore it is catering to girls rather than boys,” a consultant for EIU told The Guardian. But the bundling makes little sense when you consider the incidence of male child sex abuse. While it is not one in two as it is with girls, the frequency of exploitation — this includes indirect abuse, such as photography — of boys under 16, according to Dr. Gartner, is still fairly high at one in four. Not to mention boys also tend to underreport.
“As a parent, you don’t think about having to protect a boy as much as you imagine that you have to protect a girl,” says BizParentz’ Anne Henry. As a society, we don’t think about it either. We tell girls not to go certain places, and if they do, not to go alone. Few places are off limits to boys and, if anything, they are asked to protect their mothers, sisters, girlfriends. Having said that, Henry, whose three kids were in showbiz, never sent any of them to parties. She’s heard about Bryan Singer’s soirees for decades (which makes you wonder how MANY boys he affected…). “Nobody would send kids there,” she says. But then Henry corrects herself, because of course somebody sent their kids there, but they were specific types of somebodies. They were somebodies from someplaces far away from Hollywood, places like the Midwest, where mom acted as chaperone while dad worked (if there was a dad) and took her kid to talent competitions — Henry calls them “meat markets” — and bought questionable acting classes and hired questionable managers because more people were around telling them that was the right thing to do than that it was the wrongest thing. Per Henry, “From that point on they’ve branded themselves as prey.”
Child actors are particularly good prey when they have less stable family lives — in The Atlantic‘s expose on Bryan Singer, one victim said his mom considered convicted sex offender Marc Collins-Rector a substitute father figure. They are also considered unreliable witnesses — not only are they kids, they lie for a living — and, as aspiring stars, they have everything to lose (three men who spoke about their abuse for the first time to The Atlantic remained anonymous because they still had a “fear of retaliation”). But the most important part of all this is location — Hollywood is a place where real world rules don’t apply. There are no offices there, really, and while sets are protected, parties are not. And parties are work. So it’s not like anything goes, but almost, and if you have enough power, definitely. “There’s a lot of blurring, but that’s why predators invade this work because there’s so much blur,” explains Henry. “They know they can take advantage of grey area, so they do.”
This is the perfect spot for an agent like Martin Weiss, who became so close to one client’s family, that when he sexually assaulted their son, the victim decided not to say anything because, as he said in An Open Secret, Weiss “was really cool, everybody liked him.” (In 2012, Weiss plead no contest to “committing lewd acts” on a child under the age of 14 and was sentenced to a year in county jail.) And for producer Gary Goddard, who was accused of abusing a number of boys on Disneyland rides. And for Kevin Spacey, who Anthony Rapp, then 14 years old, accused of laying on top of him at a party. In Hollywood, work is play is kids is adults is fear is fun is friends is lovers. And while women can be predators too — Gartner quotes one study in which 60 percent of the victims were abused by men, 29 percent by women, 11 percent by both — it’s men who make up the bulk of the predators. And these men tend to present themselves the same way.
In December, writer Mark Harris tweeted about an incident with Bryan Singer in 1997, around the time the media was questioning whether teen boys had been asked to disrobe on the set of Apt Pupil. Harris was one of the few gay editors at Entertainment Weekly in the room at the time and recalled how unusual it was to hear Singer openly admit his sexuality. The filmmaker then said, according to Harris’ paraphrase: “For anyone who wants to take down a gay director in Hollywood, what is the worst thing you can throw at them? That they go after kids. So if anything, I would be EXTRA careful about how I run a set.” In a less permissive decade, this “landed” for the young journalist, who called it, “The perfect way to use your own sexual identity and someone else’s to play them.” Singer was not the only one to use this line — Spacey would attempt it 20 years later to less success — and Harris was not the only one to toe it. Says Henry, “The predators were hiding under the banner of homosexuality.”
No one wants to be the one to accuse a gay man of being a pedophile, particularly in Hollywood, which is supposed to be progressive. So in The Atlantic, Singer is described by one victim as a boundary crosser, while Michael Jackson was recently characterized by his family, in response to Leaving Neverland, a documentary about his alleged abuse of two boys, as a “an easy target because he was unique.” Henry says a number of parents of abuse victims she has encountered have been shocked because they just thought the perpetrator was gay. Similarly, the parties full of young boys were read simply as gay events with a couple of twinks thrown in. Even then, parents weren’t sending their kids to them so much as their kids were making friends at school who had connections to the men hosting. These hosts tended to be publicists, agents, managers, and acting coaches (Henry described them as “vendors” of child actors) who insulated more famous attendees from responsibility. They were also protected by the gender of their victims.
While women are likely to think they’ve been abused because they’re women, men are likely to believe abuse makes them no longer men. “The ideal man is not a victim, is resilient, is in charge of sexual situations, enjoys sex whenever its offered, particularly by a woman,” says Dr. Gartner. The co-founder of MaleSurvivor (formerly the National Organization Against Male Sexual Victimization) explains that because of this mythical ideal, boys find it hard to identify their own abuse, particularly if they’re attracted to their abuser’s gender. “They’re more likely to see that as sexual initiation, at least initially,” he explains, “and often they’ve been told that by the predator as well.” The myths abound: if you are a boy, you should be able to stop it (especially if you are a man, even more especially if you are an ex-footballer like Terry Crews); if you are gay you asked for it; if you become gay, it’s because of it; if you were aroused, it’s because you wanted it; if you were a victim, you will be a perpetrator. None of this is true. But it is true that alleged Singer victim Victor Valdovinos impregnated a girl at 16 to prove he was a man. It is true that alleged Singer victim Cesar Sanchez-Guzman appeared to think telling his parents was equivalent to coming out. It is true that alleged MJ victim James Safechuck describes himself at 10 as having a “sexual couple relationship.” It is true that alleged MJ victim Wade Robson “couldn’t believe” for the longest time that what had happened when he was 7 was bad.
* * *
Two years before Corey Haim died, he made me feel uneasy. I chose to interview him knowing he had had a history of drug addiction, but I didn’t expect him to be that bad. He looked destroyed — sallow, unintelligible, uncomfortable. In the end, all I wanted was to get away; I’m ashamed now by that impulse then. Because that impulse is what protects men like the one that — according to Corey Feldman — raped his best friend when he was just a kid. A man like that has fun at the expense of a child, leaves the child in pieces, and the child spends the rest of their life trying to put those pieces back together as we gawk at the cracks.
“It is very common for both boys and girls to become addicted or compulsive in ways that include sex, include drugs, include alcohol,” says Gartner, “and a lot of it has to do with soothing the pain.” The more you are abused, the worse your prospects — the U.S. Department of Health & Human Services reports that boys who have more than six bad experiences have a more than 4,000 percent chance (that is not a typo) of using intravenous drugs. It’s hard not to think of the number of child actors who were undone by substance abuse — Edward Furlong, Brad Renfro, Nick Stahl, Brian Bonsall, River Phoenix — without wondering what preceded this. It’s hard not to think that the deaths of so many men were because of the men they met when they were boys. It’s hard not to think that we haven’t come very far.
Five years ago Michael Egan filed a lawsuit against Bryan Singer in which he claimed that the filmmaker had assaulted him numerous times when he was just 15. His lawyer held a Gloria Allred-style press conference, but not long after dropped Egan as a client, claiming Egan had lied about two men who were not Singer. In an unrelated incident around the same time he withdrew his suit, Egan was convicted of fraud. “The collapse of the Egan case was a huge win for Singer, creating the lasting impression that the director had been exonerated,” Alex French and Max Potter wrote in The Atlantic. People believed Egan was a liar, which fit the figure he cut — alcoholic, separated, bankrupt, fraudulent — which made him appear less credible than a clean cut success story like Crews or Rapp. But the funny thing is, all of those things that hamper Egan bolster his alleged history of abuse. According to the National Survey of Child and Adolescent Well-Being, more than half of the kids — boys and girls — who are mistreated are at risk for emotional issues, behavioral issues, substance abuse, and delinquency. And the men who spoke to The Atlantic about Singer say they were left “psychologically damaged, with substance-abuse problems, depression, and PTSD.”
It was being part of a support group, which Egan found through a producer on An Open Secret, that encouraged him to file his lawsuit. Men who end up disclosing later on tend to be precipitated by the realization that they have ruined their life with substances or that they have been unable to maintain any relationships (Gartner notes that they are “introduced to sex as something that happens in a power relationship where one exploits the other.”) Another trigger is having a kid of their own — this prompted the two men in Leaving Neverland to speak out — or that kid turning the age they were when they were abused. Media reports also help, though Gartner says it’s “early days” to tell whether anything has really changed. While Rapp was empowered by the #MeToo movement, abuse can only begin to be dismantled once we acknowledge its nuances with respect to race, sexuality, disability, and also gender. And that involves hearing out all victims, including boys and men. “What one hopes for is that a man would be able to make it less powerful,” says Gartner, “put it in the corner of his consciousness and only bring it out when it needs to be.” Once he talks, the prognosis varies, but to talk is to address — a boy can’t change his history, but it doesn’t have to define his future.
The following resources are available to provide support for boys and men who have experienced, or know someone who has experienced, child sex abuse: malesurvivor.org and 1in6.org.
* * *
Soraya Roberts is a culture columnist at Longreads.
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lodelss · 5 years
Text
The Lost Boys of #MeToo
Soraya Roberts | Longreads | February 2019 | 10 minutes (2,500 words)
At the end of An Open Secret, the 2015 documentary by Amy J. Berg about child sex abuse in Hollywood, a card reads: “The filmmakers emphasize that this is not a gender based issue. We chose to tell these specific stories, but they are representations of a greater issue that affects both boys and girls.” It was an odd thing to read after watching a 99-minute film — one that could not secure a distributor and was self-released on Vimeo — in which no girls were mentioned. Whether or not it was intentional, the statement had the effect of equating the two genders, erasing any nuance that might exist in a male victim versus a female victim. It leaves the impression that the abuse we predominantly talk about — which, in our current climate, targets girls and women — is the standard. So the way girls and women are mistreated and how they react to this mistreatment is how all of us do. The fallout from Harvey Weinstein and Bill Cosby and R. Kelly is the fallout from Michael Jackson and Kevin Spacey and Bryan Singer and Gary Goddard.
Maybe it’s the numbers — according to Dr. Richard Gartner, author of Betrayed as Boys: Psychodynamic Treatment of Sexually Abused Men, twice as many girls (one in three) as boys (one in six) are sexually abused. So girls take priority. But it’s more than that. Rape culture means that when you hear the allegations against Roman Polanski, Woody Allen, Jeffrey Epstein, Larry Nassar, you are surprised at the scope of their actions, but not at the gender of their victims. When you see a Hollywood party overflowing with teen girls carted in to appease a room full of grey-haired execs, it is status quo. Casting couches have been around forever, right? But a party full of teen boys, what the hell does that mean?! Maybe my perception of these male-dominated parties is just skewed because I haven’t normalized male sexuality, so when I see it, it appears abnormal. “To me it seems like there is an overrepresentation of young boys being abused, but that can’t be right?” I hear myself waffle while interviewing Anne Henry, co-founder of BizParentz, an advocacy group for child actors. But her response is immediate. “No, it is right,” she says. “It’s not just your perception.”
* * *
The World Health Organization defines child sex abuse as “the involvement of a child in sexual activity that he or she does not fully comprehend and is unable to give informed consent to, or for which the child is not developmentally prepared, or else that violate the laws or social taboos of society.” Here “child” may as well be “girl.” A study of 40 countries from earlier this year found that only five of them — Cambodia, Kenya, Tanzania, Uganda, and South Korea — “collect prevalence data for boys related to child sexual exploitation.” The Economist Intelligence Unit also found that the laws and support services are predominantly directed towards girls. “Often this is bundled up into an issue of violence against women, and therefore it is catering to girls rather than boys,” a consultant for EIU told The Guardian. But the bundling makes little sense when you consider the incidence of male child sex abuse. While it is not one in two as it is with girls, the frequency of exploitation — this includes indirect abuse, such as photography — of boys under 16, according to Dr. Gartner, is still fairly high at one in four. Not to mention boys also tend to underreport.
“As a parent, you don’t think about having to protect a boy as much as you imagine that you have to protect a girl,” says BizParentz’ Anne Henry. As a society, we don’t think about it either. We tell girls not to go certain places, and if they do, not to go alone. Few places are off limits to boys and, if anything, they are asked to protect their mothers, sisters, girlfriends. Having said that, Henry, whose three kids were in showbiz, never sent any of them to parties. She’s heard about Bryan Singer’s soirees for decades (which makes you wonder how MANY boys he affected…). “Nobody would send kids there,” she says. But then Henry corrects herself, because of course somebody sent their kids there, but they were specific types of somebodies. They were somebodies from someplaces far away from Hollywood, places like the Midwest, where mom acted as chaperone while dad worked (if there was a dad) and took her kid to talent competitions — Henry calls them “meat markets” — and bought questionable acting classes and hired questionable managers because more people were around telling them that was the right thing to do than that it was the wrongest thing. Per Henry, “From that point on they’ve branded themselves as prey.”
Child actors are particularly good prey when they have less stable family lives — in The Atlantic‘s expose on Bryan Singer, one victim said his mom considered convicted sex offender Marc Collins-Rector a substitute father figure. They are also considered unreliable witnesses — not only are they kids, they lie for a living — and, as aspiring stars, they have everything to lose (three men who spoke about their abuse for the first time to The Atlantic remained anonymous because they still had a “fear of retaliation”). But the most important part of all this is location — Hollywood is a place where real world rules don’t apply. There are no offices there, really, and while sets are protected, parties are not. And parties are work. So it’s not like anything goes, but almost, and if you have enough power, definitely. “There’s a lot of blurring, but that’s why predators invade this work because there’s so much blur,” explains Henry. “They know they can take advantage of grey area, so they do.”
This is the perfect spot for an agent like Martin Weiss, who became so close to one client’s family, that when he sexually assaulted their son, the victim decided not to say anything because, as he said in An Open Secret, Weiss “was really cool, everybody liked him.” (In 2012, Weiss plead no contest to “committing lewd acts” on a child under the age of 14 and was sentenced to a year in county jail.) And for producer Gary Goddard, who was accused of abusing a number of boys on Disneyland rides. And for Kevin Spacey, who Anthony Rapp, then 14 years old, accused of laying on top of him at a party. In Hollywood, work is play is kids is adults is fear is fun is friends is lovers. And while women can be predators too — Gartner quotes one study in which 60 percent of the victims were abused by men, 29 percent by women, 11 percent by both — it’s men who make up the bulk of the predators. And these men tend to present themselves the same way.
In December, writer Mark Harris tweeted about an incident with Bryan Singer in 1997, around the time the media was questioning whether teen boys had been asked to disrobe on the set of Apt Pupil. Harris was one of the few gay editors at Entertainment Weekly in the room at the time and recalled how unusual it was to hear Singer openly admit his sexuality. The filmmaker then said, according to Harris’ paraphrase: “For anyone who wants to take down a gay director in Hollywood, what is the worst thing you can throw at them? That they go after kids. So if anything, I would be EXTRA careful about how I run a set.” In a less permissive decade, this “landed” for the young journalist, who called it, “The perfect way to use your own sexual identity and someone else’s to play them.” Singer was not the only one to use this line — Spacey would attempt it 20 years later to less success — and Harris was not the only one to toe it. Says Henry, “The predators were hiding under the banner of homosexuality.”
No one wants to be the one to accuse a gay man of being a pedophile, particularly in Hollywood, which is supposed to be progressive. So in The Atlantic, Singer is described by one victim as a boundary crosser, while Michael Jackson was recently characterized by his family, in response to Leaving Neverland, a documentary about his alleged abuse of two boys, as a “an easy target because he was unique.” Henry says a number of parents of abuse victims she has encountered have been shocked because they just thought the perpetrator was gay. Similarly, the parties full of young boys were read simply as gay events with a couple of twinks thrown in. Even then, parents weren’t sending their kids to them so much as their kids were making friends at school who had connections to the men hosting. These hosts tended to be publicists, agents, managers, and acting coaches (Henry described them as “vendors” of child actors) who insulated more famous attendees from responsibility. They were also protected by the gender of their victims.
While women are likely to think they’ve been abused because they’re women, men are likely to believe abuse makes them no longer men. “The ideal man is not a victim, is resilient, is in charge of sexual situations, enjoys sex whenever its offered, particularly by a woman,” says Dr. Gartner. The co-founder of MaleSurvivor (formerly the National Organization Against Male Sexual Victimization) explains that because of this mythical ideal, boys find it hard to identify their own abuse, particularly if they’re attracted to their abuser’s gender. “They’re more likely to see that as sexual initiation, at least initially,” he explains, “and often they’ve been told that by the predator as well.” The myths abound: if you are a boy, you should be able to stop it (especially if you are a man, even more especially if you are an ex-footballer like Terry Crews); if you are gay you asked for it; if you become gay, it’s because of it; if you were aroused, it’s because you wanted it; if you were a victim, you will be a perpetrator. None of this is true. But it is true that alleged Singer victim Victor Valdovinos impregnated a girl at 16 to prove he was a man. It is true that alleged Singer victim Cesar Sanchez-Guzman appeared to think telling his parents was equivalent to coming out. It is true that alleged MJ victim James Safechuck describes himself at 10 as having a “sexual couple relationship.” It is true that alleged MJ victim Wade Robson “couldn’t believe” for the longest time that what had happened when he was 7 was bad.
* * *
Two years before Corey Haim died, he made me feel uneasy. I chose to interview him knowing he had had a history of drug addiction, but I didn’t expect him to be that bad. He looked destroyed — sallow, unintelligible, uncomfortable. In the end, all I wanted was to get away; I’m ashamed now by that impulse then. Because that impulse is what protects men like the one that — according to Corey Feldman — raped his best friend when he was just a kid. A man like that has fun at the expense of a child, leaves the child in pieces, and the child spends the rest of their life trying to put those pieces back together as we gawk at the cracks.
“It is very common for both boys and girls to become addicted or compulsive in ways that include sex, include drugs, include alcohol,” says Gartner, “and a lot of it has to do with soothing the pain.” The more you are abused, the worse your prospects — the U.S. Department of Health & Human Services reports that boys who have more than six bad experiences have a more than 4,000 percent chance (that is not a typo) of using intravenous drugs. It’s hard not to think of the number of child actors who were undone by substance abuse — Edward Furlong, Brad Renfro, Nick Stahl, Brian Bonsall, River Phoenix — without wondering what preceded this. It’s hard not to think that the deaths of so many men were because of the men they met when they were boys. It’s hard not to think that we haven’t come very far.
Five years ago Michael Egan filed a lawsuit against Bryan Singer in which he claimed that the filmmaker had assaulted him numerous times when he was just 15. His lawyer held a Gloria Allred-style press conference, but not long after dropped Egan as a client, claiming Egan had lied about two men who were not Singer. In an unrelated incident around the same time he withdrew his suit, Egan was convicted of fraud. “The collapse of the Egan case was a huge win for Singer, creating the lasting impression that the director had been exonerated,” Alex French and Max Potter wrote in The Atlantic. People believed Egan was a liar, which fit the figure he cut — alcoholic, separated, bankrupt, fraudulent — which made him appear less credible than a clean cut success story like Crews or Rapp. But the funny thing is, all of those things that hamper Egan bolster his alleged history of abuse. According to the National Survey of Child and Adolescent Well-Being, more than half of the kids — boys and girls — who are mistreated are at risk for emotional issues, behavioral issues, substance abuse, and delinquency. And the men who spoke to The Atlantic about Singer say they were left “psychologically damaged, with substance-abuse problems, depression, and PTSD.”
It was being part of a support group, which Egan found through a producer on An Open Secret, that encouraged him to file his lawsuit. Men who end up disclosing later on tend to be precipitated by the realization that they have ruined their life with substances or that they have been unable to maintain any relationships (Gartner notes that they are “introduced to sex as something that happens in a power relationship where one exploits the other.”) Another trigger is having a kid of their own — this prompted the two men in Leaving Neverland to speak out — or that kid turning the age they were when they were abused. Media reports also help, though Gartner says it’s “early days” to tell whether anything has really changed. While Rapp was empowered by the #MeToo movement, abuse can only begin to be dismantled once we acknowledge its nuances with respect to race, sexuality, disability, and also gender. And that involves hearing out all victims, including boys and men. “What one hopes for is that a man would be able to make it less powerful,” says Gartner, “put it in the corner of his consciousness and only bring it out when it needs to be.” Once he talks, the prognosis varies, but to talk is to address — a boy can’t change his history, but it doesn’t have to define his future.
The following resources are available to provide support for boys and men who have experienced, or know someone who has experienced, child sex abuse: malesurvivor.org and 1in6.org.
* * *
Soraya Roberts is a culture columnist at Longreads.
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