#literally mad abt it tho
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first the pirate poll drama and now the stucky fans are frothing at the mouth lmao. literally i think everyone just hates the ofmd fandom bc they want what we have (queer queer romance written by a diverse writers room that actually cares about the characters and the story they're telling)
#for the record stucky was a FORMATIVE ship for me. it shaped me as a person it changed my literal brain chemistry forever.#i get it!! i know my hersory!!! i just really don't care who wins lol#Who Cares#the anger abt it all is so fucking funny tho fjdkshjkf#ofmd#our flag means death#gentlebeard#blackbonnet#mcu#txt#mine#og#stucky poll#anyway in case this breaks containment uhhh what are some disclaimers i should make. hmmmm.#ok so ofmd is not perfect and i have a whole tag for criticizing it (yes this includes criticizing the entire premise)#yes also the ofmd fandom is annoying but so is every fandom who cares#also idc if you voted for stucky or gentlebeard im just here to laugh when ppl get rlly mad abt tumblr polls
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I get too insane when I think about the arcs they robbed from Sam in the late seasons
#Lucifer comes back he’s barely given space to be mad and scared and horrified#god shows up he doesn’t get the opportunity to confront him abt the years and years and years of faith; only to be destined for Satan#Mary comes back and he doesn’t get to bond w her like dean does and DEAN gets to be the one who’s mad at her#even tho she LITERALLY SOLD SAM to the DEVIL#10 years before he was even born#It’s so fucking SAD#and like I’m ok that Dean got to have his moment with Mary /but Sam deserved it too/ if not /more/#I’m glad Dean went off on god but it would’ve read as more /real/ to me if /Sam/ had gotten to do it#BC SAM WAS THE ONE WITH FAITH#HE WAS THE ONE PERSONALLY BETRAYED#And at the end of the day this to me ends up reading as Sam being the fucking kindest and most beaten down character EVER#but I know that it was just bad writing and prioritizing dean over Sam#It’s fine#I will just be bitter forever#at least the first 5 seasons are the only ones that count amiright?#Sammy#spn
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the only thing i hate more than ppl who lie is ppl who lie in a way that forces you to go along with it like ohhhmy fucking god do whatever the fuck you want if it's only yourself you're embarrassing but why would you bring ME into this. lord
#just tell the fucking truth!!!!! it's always so fucking obvious too like omg 😭😭 shutthe fuck up#anyway guess who has to make like 5 extra trips across budapest coz their father is insane (me)#no reason!!! no reason whatsoever!!!!! literally could've just told the truth!!!!!!#him and another man both expect me to lie to a bunch of people but they're also#lying to EACH OTHER and i know they're lying and they know i know but they dont know the other's lying#AND FOR FUCKING WHAT!!! YOU COULD JUST BE HONEST. IT'S SO EASY.#i literally dont give a shit if it's just his lies he's a /redacted/ it's literally his job to lie. BUT LEAVE ME OUTTT OMGGG fuck#also they didnt explain to me that I'd have to lie and then got mad at me for not lying. LIKE GIRL . WHAT ♥#ended up calling other guy's secretary coz i literally had noone else to talk to abt it and i was abt to have like a#full nervous breakdown in a public square. poor woman#she was very nice tho. thankfully coz that would've been the last straw for real#barking#also i tried soooo hard to get clear instructions from either of them and neither of them told me Anything#LIKE BRO IM GONNA BLOW UP. TELL ME EXACTLY WHAT I NEED TO DO. STEP BY STEP
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haven’t been on much bc my dog has been sick :( between seizures and an infected tooth we’ve been having a Time trying to get everything fixed (this started around the holidays so our vet has been very booked up…we have been like 3-4 times in the past 4-5 weeks OTL does not help it’s like an hour drive there, so that’s been exhausting) now his new seizure meds are making him sick (was hoping it was like, just an adjustment period thing but he’s been sick for a week and having concerning symptoms…) if I’m not on a ton or slow to replying to messages it’s bc I’m working as much overtime as my job will give me bc Vet Expensive and mentally drained obvi 😞
#it makes me a lil mad his meds were kinda pricy and they literally are making things worse. like sure he isn’t have seizures but he can#barely walk and keeps running into things and keeps having diarrhea so like. 🙃 and the meds are making him sooo hungry and thirsty#I’m seeing the vet AGAIN FRIDAY I know she’s so sick of me but man my little guy. if she can’t figure out a combo that doesn’t have such#bad side effects I’m literally going to scream and cry#he’s the most sensitive boy in the world and my mental health hangs on his and my cats well being. please. 😭#sanchoyorambles#I’ve also called them like twice to find out if I should stop or what they want me to do and keep getting ‘oh they’ll call u back’ WHEN#GIRL MY PUBBY#if I don’t hear back before his next dose I’m just gonna make an executive decision myself to stop them for now#he’s literally on the smallest possible dose too bc he’s so little. so. they can’t go down in dosage they’ll need to put him on smth else 😑#which means paying for ANOTHER PRESCRIPTION A WEEK AFTER ALREASY GETTING ONE THAT WAS $30 ON TOP OF HIS STUPID VET BILL#screaming.#and like if I have the money it’s fine. and it’s not like the vet could’ve known he’d have bad side effects#im just frustrated it’s no one’s fault#I could go to a closer vet. the thing is I LIKE the one further away#they have the only groomer I’ve found that can trim him without sedating him! they send me reminders abt his shots! I like the vibes!!!#they seem caring!! but they are always SOOO BUSY it takes forever to make appointments or to hear back from them 😭#remember how I said one of my goals was to buy a vechicle this year lmao the vet bills are draining any savings I’ve managed to build up 🤧#my pets are priority 1 tho like even before all the medical stuff /I/ need like lol… that’s my baby#it’s just really bad timing. not that there’s good timing for medical issues but. u know
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waow... miku expo...........
#got back from it and its soooooo....#didnt get a lightstick but the person next to me had two and offered one for the concert ;__;#the setlist this year isnt my favorite im more familiar with older songs but im glad utsu p got a song in :) two if you count vivid#idk why ppl r too mad abt the screen bc thats how previous miku expos have been? u dont literally have ahologram or anything#just bummed it didnt have multiple screens like when i went in 2018#live band was so insane too like omg one of my favorite parts of miku expo is doing the individual introductions hehehe#honestly the lightstick makes all the difference LOL even tho idrc abt most of the setlist waving the lightstick was SOOO fun#like to the point where i didnt really care if the song was good or not if it was fun with the lightstick#my arms sore from this LOL#also i lost my fucking headphones on the way out ghjdfhgk#egg talks
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#yes i own this yes its the official one yes its vintage#i love my shitty local anime store#me when i breath a sigh of relief bc even tho it was in womens section it doesnt say womens on the tag#my mom the type of woman to see me wearing this shit and get mad cuz 'a boy wearing a WOMAN SHIRT?!?' and not cuz it has literal aids on it🤨#anyways pls vote#i did a whole spiel abt my reasons why im torn but decided thats gay and deleted those tags#just know that i unironically live like aph prussia okay#so i will not lose any social cred if anything this will further cement my matsuno bottom of barrel status#so dont worry about people hating me. Just Vote#robooty kun#robooty hellworld#robooty lifestyle
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like a cat bringing u a live mouse
#kny clan au#kny clan au: arranged sanegiyu(fluff)#this is like the third scene thing in the timeline i have#havent drawn the other two tho#1st one is him giving sanemi a black wolf fur cloak to match his for the wedding gift 2nd is him & sanemi sparring in the cloaks so he can#actually use it in battle and not get fucked over by not being used to it. 3rd is this one where giyuu goes to the hunters#lodge & hes blunt abt how shit their practices are and the head dude got Pissed and chased him all the way to sanemi#giyuu dropped & kicked a leg out to trip him then put his hand to the dude's chest and slammed him into the ground right in front of sanemi#sanemi then went off abt how the tomioka live in the mountains and dont farm as much- theyre literally an entire clan of hunters#of course giyuu would be more skilled than some pompous fuck that hunts as an aesthetic#later at home giyuu tries to thank him for going above and beyond defending his skill & sanemi snaps 'don't fucking thank me for being#a decent person!' giyuu pauses to parse why exactly he got mad abt it and tells him he cant blame himself for other's attitudes. he cant#control how people will treat others no matter how much political power he has#shinazugawa sanemi#sanemi shinazugawa#tomioka giyuu#giyuu tomioka#sanemi#giyuu#anyways giyuu is really pretty and i love how he came out#OH YEAH ALMOST FORGOT TO MENTION#this particular scene giyuu being playful abt following orders oddly is a side of himself he exaggerated for Nakuu's character#sanemi notices that it feels really familiar but he doesnt connect the dots#shit fuck ass#sanegiyuu#forgot to tag the ship#neros art tag
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i lost the idgaf war because im a sillay dog and got upset that a version of the comic man i liked flirted with a woman and called her sweet pet names in a non canon comic timeline so i took it out on the one i like. like when you have a bad dream and wake up mad at someone even tho it was dream them that did smth.
however i got sad abt it cuz i couldnt take ignoring him or being mad at him any longer. which in turn made me mad at him again for making me sad. never ending cycle
#dragon's ramblings#wolf2099#he called her my corazon and my lady and my love and he was so clingy and sweet to her#and i sat there MAD abt it even tho thats not even 928 mig but idk WHY i was mad i just WAS#mad that its not Me#i literally had a straight woman moment of ''you were looking at that other girl sorry i cant be her''#except im a gay man and miguel had no clue of knowing wtf was wrong with me
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i mean this in all seriousness.....
every bonus and raise i get at work is cuz i taught myself adobe automation tools and javascript for adobe (even though i took cs in hs like, i could not find a class in what i wanted so i just had to self teach it)
but the only reason i self taught that was cuz i was overly obsessed with kpop
so as long as all my savings accounts are where they should be (percentage of income-wise)... so like 401k, emergency fund, down-payment fund.......(which.....are all invested and/or in high yield 4.5% monthly compounding interest accts and are making their own money)
i can just dump all my disposable income into kpop because if i wasn't unhinged about kpop, i would not have this much disposable income lol
i feel like this is 100% an original meaning of girlmath moment tbh
#personal#i mean i also.....budget like a crazy person and save like....20-25% of my yearly gross income lol#and was doing that when i was broke too......bc im nuts and also bc the same reason my mom was nuts abt saving#(my mom was afraid shed have another stroke so she saved sooo much for retirement...and then did have to#retire early....but not bc of stroke but bc she also had CANCER what the actual fuck#like shes never done drugs and barely drinks and was a professional dancer which is like...a literal athlete..#thats NOT FAIR)#soooo she taught me how to save and invest super early lol.....like she....had me put my#bday money in an investment account every year and i was only allowed to spend interest#(explaining interest on a CD to a 8 year old by saying its a free GBA game lmao)#that was literally how she explained the $30 of interest the cd made i was like...ooo free!! i like free free is good!!#i have like.....enough to cover 2 months of basic bills (not including paychecks coming in) in checking#and then everything else is invested or in high yield.....#im so mad rn bc my 401k isnt doing that great tho....like my high yeild and my brokerage accounts are doing better#like the 401k is pretaxed and i get a very generous employer match of 5% instead of 3% so its worth#putting the money there instead of having it in my paycheck and putting it with the broker#buuuuut its annoying me#like im definitely getting more overall out of putting in 401k....but i wish it was making the same interest as my brokerage is
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the last remaining threads of my sanity are slipping through my fingers rn 🚬 😑
#i'm out of cigarettes i'm incredibly ill and i'm reconsidering my relationship to a certain fandom.#look i'm NOT saying i'm gonna stop the divorce proceedings but uh. fuck. i may have been re reading some of my older works and unfinished#fics and i MAY. i repeat MAY. have some tiny shred of interest posting about st*r w*rs again#motherfucker i'm SO hesitant to speak that into existence and will be absolutley APOPLECTIC if it happens bc i don't fucking WANNA like sw!#i divorced it! i took the kids (my ocs) & filed a restraining order & crossed state lines & broke all contact and yet! and fucking yet!!!!#i find myself in tags i havent visited in over two years on the archive like some beaten dog slinking back home to a shitty master#i honestly hate like. fucking ALL of the shit i've written from then that i reread and some of it was so bad i couldnt even bring myself to#click on it after reading the summary. like. UGH! i have a half baked fic idea i wrote a little for and i think it's more compelling than#any of the literal dogshit i posted back then so i MIGHT work on polishing that up and posting something that isn't actual garbage by my#current standards. all of this is still up in the air tho bc i dont know if the hyperfixation or even the bare minimum lvl of interest has#returned or if it's just fever induced delirium. i've been having INCREDIBLY fucked up bad horrible awful vivid dreams as of late so fever#induced brain fuckery isn't out of the question. sigh. i'm so mad abt this#even if i do regain some interest in the fandom i don't think i'll have any interest in new source material after the mando s2 finale &#tbo.bf sucking ass & the obi show being mid & everything with the ST. i plan on watching ando.r but after that? zero interest in anything#new from sw. so. if anyone still reading this and is getting excited abt me POSSIBLY MAYBE being interested in sw just know i still hate it#a bit and feel like i'm being dragged kicking and screaming back into this mess unwillingly. or it's due to a fever. god i need a smoke#len speaks#that's literally the longest tag rant i've ever gone on. fuck that's a BAD sign
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oh my fucking god. i just watched phil's vod with the "nightmare". jesus fucking christ.
#THATS SO FUCKING UNFAIR#like even tho its noncanonical and the deaths got reveresed weeks ago i'm so mad abt it#and phil is fucking right!!!#they should be allowed to use diamonds and enchantments if the mobs are that fucking buffed#there is literally no way they could be op even with zero restrictions at the point in the series i'm at#its not fun for the streamers to play and its not fun for us to watch#i wanna watch them have fun with their eggs and build the smps lore#not have to be constantly stressed out bc of zombies that can one/twoshot them#qsmp#jonathan rambles
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yes hello i'm tempted to actually Flesh Out OCs 4 the first time around the seraph / haruspex / queensguard titles..........................
#i love these titles it's ALL vibes no bragging rights. makes the fake geek bros mad. marks me as rasputin / eris / mara's little pogchamp#viitalks#MAYBE......#*hsm voice* i don't write tho#<- has literally never Written A Little Guy Into Existence#i've been around the concept for over a decade tho it's just. scawwy#like i started out designing a bunch of little creatures for ppl to buy for like 5 bucks on deviantart#but i could never like. sit down & play w/ the dolls bc i was constantly fucken supervised & inconsistently online#like i'd get screen time for a while & then it'd be confiscated for a couple days or a couple weeks like#it was super inconsistent so i always had a hard time like... reaching out + sticking w/ people bc of like shyness & fomo#english-as-a-second-language shit too lol my folks were Weird abt that as mexicans who wanted to stay in the uk rly rly bad#like they tried sooo hard to Not Be Like The Other Thirdworlders but still didn't get picked....... so they made me Weird abt english#& anglophone spaces. & that took (is taking?) A While to unpack oops#sorry if it's Always Trauma Processing Hours Here lol it's just. do i look like i can afford therapy to u
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dama de noche (night-blooming jasmine, literally lady of the night)
a horror comic i did for a school project a little while back! something something, the real monster was man.
warnings: domestic abuse, murder, some blood
it's kind of Long so the rest is going down here ⤵️
if you made it all the way down here, thank you for reading!
#november draws#oc art#i guess???#tw abuse#tw domestic abuse#and now if you're reading the tags. hello.#you get to read my complaints about when i was writing this bc i am still so mad about it lmao#tldr part of my critiques were that it's Too Subtle that the husband sucks#as if him throwing a glass at her and being overall controlling isn't already a red flag???? bro#like yes murder is an overreaction but it's horror babe ofc not everyone reacts sensibly#and i got another critique that was like 'damn the wife is crazy i feel bad for the husband'#ESCUSEME???? HELLO???#i think that if u read a story abt an abused wife with a controlling husband and she's always scared of him#and he always thinks she's lying for literally no reason even tho she's not. and u see him throw things at her AND U COME AWAY LIKE#'DAMN SHE CRAZY' then idt that's really a failing on my part as a storyteller you're just stupid#sorry that's enough in the tags i also complained on twitter thank u for reading this too if u did
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throwback to when someone got mad and blocked me for ranting in the tags of their post abt how making stede nice to izzy for the sake of steddyhands or stizzy content is ooc (which is totally fair, i didnt have to go off on their post, i probably shoud've just left them alone) but like
this is the HARMLESS thing i get mad abt. this is literally me being annoyed and petty over something stupid. i rant abt it bc it's nice to rant abt something the fandom does that annoys me but isn't like, actually a big deal. i dont ship stizzy or steddyhands or anything so it's not like i'm looking for in-character fics abt those ships and getting mad i cant find them. i'm not dying on this hill, i'm just standing on it yelling for a while until i get bored
#txt#mine#og#ofmd fandom crit#stede bonnet#izzy hands#steddyhands#stizzy#the real problem i have with stizzy content is i just dont care about it at all.#if ur gonna do it tho i feel like u should do stede justice??#like a GENUINE enemies to lovers not ''stede decides to pamper izzy for no reason even tho he hates izzy so fucking much''#however. my real problem with steddyhands content is the fics that make ed more violent/abusive than he is in canon#and also all the fics that brush off ed's trauma for the sake of coddling and babying izzy#like oh we're ignoring the protagonist of color to focus on the feelings of the white antagonist?? lmao alright. i see you.#and i DO talk abt these things. ive talked abt them a LOT#but it's nice sometimes to just. focus on and be mad abt something stupid#stede bonnet is a bITCH and he HATES IZZY HANDS#if u make him nice to izzy right off the bat im like Who The Fuck Are You And What Have You Done To Stede Bonnet#this is a personal pet peeve i dont think this is problematic or anything it just mildly annoys me. which is FINE!!!#ppl like different things it does not actually matter if i think u have bad taste. u probably think i have bad taste! it's Literally Fine.
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god why do people have to be so fucking intolerable
#4am thoughts ig#idk i’m just#thinking abt how my choir teacher is an elitist bitch#who only cares abt the kids who are musical prodigies or who are rich enough to pay for voice lessons#and could not give less of a fuck about anybody else#and thinking about my friend who’s supposed to be the ‘chill mom friend’#and how instead she acts like an immature child who throws a fit the minute things don’t go her way#and how all of our other friends support her bullshit bc ‘that’s just the way she is!’#god get fucked#i don’t mean that but it really feels like i do rn#she straight up almost outed me to my mom. which were that to ever happen i would be fucking ///screwed/// beyond belief#and when i got upset with her bc that’s literally a life or death situation for me#she had the ////AU-FUCKING-DACITY//// to get mad at me for being upset with her!!!#‘ jeez i’m sorry! i just forgot you don’t need to be that mad!’ BITCH I COULD FUCKING DIE IF SHE FINDS OUT#this is why i can’t be friends with cis ppl istg#and the thing is that even if she were trans she’d still never get it.#her parents are supportive. they actually love her.#she’ll never have to face being kicked out or worse if she ever came out to them as trans#god fucking. idk anymore.#it felt good to get this out tho i’ll admit that#anyways i’m gonna go look at ace attorney things and hope that makes me feel better#k.txt#vent tw
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