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shepscapades · 10 months

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I have two minds to answer this, because part of me is going 'WE GOT EM!!! WE GOT EM!!' While the other part of me is like 'oh god how do I tell them. Who’s going to tell them.' The easiest way I can explain: Tom, Ben, and Harry are not in a minecraft series together, and the lore that I have for them is not based in any actual series. HOWEVER. DON’T LET THE TRAGIC TRUTH MAKE YOU CLICK AWAY /silly so I can explain properly LMAO

Here’s a TLDR for anyone who likes these guys and is a lil interested in them!!

Most of the lore for these three is based on an amalgamation of inside jokes, non-minecraft character trends, and general yogs minecraft world lore!

Tom was an editor (now has a YouTube channel, AngoryTom) and did behind-the-scenes minecraft prep for the Yogscast for so long that he was never really interested in any actual "main channel" series besides [Dig Site - 10 episodes] with Simon, Lewis, and Ben, and [Skyblock - 2 episodes] with Ben! Although he’s also played several npcs throughout various main channel series since he was helping run the show lol. My take on his character is that he’s a former yoglabs employee due to [YOGLABS CLASSIFIED INFORMATION] and now lives his laziest life ever in an undisclosed remote location. He’s also the demigod of death but he’ll never tell

Ben started doing main series mc content a few years ago, but hasn’t done anything mc with Tom and Harry until recently (see below)! His character is a Shark Hybrid due to [YOGLABS CLASSIFIED INFORMATION] who now lives with Tom at the same undisclosed remote location.

Harry has been an insane speedrunning minecraft legend for ages, but was never in any main series content bc he’s actually a graphic designer for the yogs. But he was part of Iskall’s twitch vault hunter event back in November, and he’s now in the [Vault Hunter Series - Ongoing] with Ben and Duncan on YouTube! <3 so there’s plenty of mc content of Harry and Ben, but not so much Tom. c!Harry has lived remote for as long as he can remember, locked in Hardcore, until…?

But again, I base their backstories on a bunch of kinda loosely connected lore dots that are half based on jokes <3

Below the read more includes: links to clips, compilations, and very brief lore explanations (though you can check my other lore drawings in Tom’s tag (#Angory Tom), Ben’s tag (#bedgar), Harry’s tag (#brryhrry) or posts that have any of them, which should be under the (#the outcast trio) tag)!

BEN AND TOM

I’ve been in love with Ben and Tom as a duo forever, since the TTT (modded Trouble in Terrorist Town) days, where Ben’s player model was Left Shark, and Tom’s model was Emperor Palpatine (yes from Star Wars. I can’t stand them). But Ben and Tom have been yogs editors and Behind The Scenes guys forever, so it wasn’t until more recently that they became known personalities in the main yogscast circle (4-5 years is pretty recent in the 10+ years of yogs content timeline LMAO).

Through Warhammer streams and behind the scenes stuff, I kinda fell in love with their chemistry and idiocy, and they worked so well with the “main cast” that I just had to put them in the yogs minecraft universe, somewhere. Turns out, Tom had actually done a majority of the "behind the scenes" work for the Yoglabs series (he built a majority of the main building, did mod research and testing, was present during recordings to make sure things went well, stuff like that) so it only made sense to have his character be the Right Hand Man/ Behind The Scenes Assistant to Xephos (Lewis), the Morally Questionable Head of Yoglabs.

For anyone who’s unfamiliar with Yoglabs, it’s one of the yogs’ more famous series featuring Simon (Honeydew) and Lewis (Xephos) where they tested mods! more info can be found here!

c!Tom also ended up as a Lumian (the fanon alien space species for the yogs fandom, vaguely inspired by Star Trek Vulcans) because of a one-off joke where one of the Yogs artists drew him as a star trek commander, and I really didn’t need any further reason to make him a weird little guy LDKFJG

As far as the “demigod of death” thing goes, it felt right to give him a lore thing that vaguely coordinated with the whole “Emporer Palpatine” vibe, since that’s kinda the mc skin he’s used most recently. There’s another reason there that I don’t think I’ve properly explained, so I’ll leave the rest of that be for now ;]

Ben, on the other hand, plays a shark character in pretty much every video game he ever participates in, so shark hybrid was a pretty obvious way to go. And of course, since the duo had to be in the same place… involving Ben’s shark Hybrid-ness with yoglabs experimentation made good sense and good angst. What can I say :]

Here are the bigger lore posts I’ve made so far (in the order i posted them i believe!), explaining in a little more detail plus art to go with! :] [x] [x] [x]

HARRY

Harry is kinda known as the yogscast’s token memelord? But in the ironic way. He somehow makes it genuinely hilarious idk man. His humor is very dry, witty, and sarcastic, but he’s a sweetheart and kind of a god at minecraft. I’ve been arguing since day one that this man should be in mcc but we won’t go there

There aren't many solo harry compilations, so here's a link to a Harry and Ben compilation hehe

Regarding his minecraft lore, pretty much all of it is based around the idea that he’s a god at speedrunning and hardcore Minecraft. A common consensus in yogscast minecraft lore is that respawning is actually a Yoglabs-based mechanic tied to clones and clone making. I thought it would be interesting if Harry could be tied to a hardcore element in the yogs lore purely by having Somehow slid under yoglabs’ radar. And since he was never in any main channel (aka modded) series, i usually associate him with Vanilla mechanics, and since i also view mods as a Yoglabs-related lore element, it made sense! So basically— no clones, no respawns, no mods!

except that he’s in a main channel series now. So I’ll need to find a new lore reason around that DTBJDFGHK

And his design, well… this man’s skin is straight up Mr Mime, and there’s only so much I can do with that /silly But he’s a HUGE Pokémon fan! He’s played a couple of Disaster Nuzlockes with Lydia from the yogs a year or so ago, if that’s something you’re interested in! Was a huge comfort series for me for the longest time and rly good background noise, theyre soooo good at Pokémon I promise <3

Harry does more twitch stuff (hrry on twitch) than youtube stuff, so twitch is the best place to check him out if you're interested in his solo content!

Last thing I'll say about him is that he designed and ran an original minecraft minigame called "Capture the Wool" and he and Martyn are the hosts for a few episodes i think! i dont think there's any way to explain how entertaining it is to listen to him announce the chaos of yogs members trying to play competitive minecraft LOL

Um, so. TLDR…2, These guys are basically my ocs and now I get Actual minecraft content from them which is crazy. I love them as content creators and cool guys so so much though, so! Definitely recommend listening to these idiots (affectionate) babble and ramble to each other, mc or not <3

#yogscast #bedgar #angory tom #BrryHrry #hrry #ben #tom #the outcast trio #art escapades #sorry that's so long but my love for them is showing hehe #i haven't completed decided if i want the “the outcast trio” tag to be for posts with ANY of them or just ALL of them so --#if you have a preference feel free to lmk <3 #also feel free to lmk if you check them out :3 they are everything to the me!

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kraaico · 1 year

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Where/how do you get the ideas to make these super cute art? I love art but I basically copy others and I wanna have my own style.

What a nice question!! I could honestly write a book about this, but for now I'll keep it condensed. (maybe uhhhh a blog post later or smthn) ....Sorry it's long anyway lol

These are my thoughts as an independent illustrator/artist that has the time and freedom to create what I wish, keep that in mind. I can't vouch for what it takes to get through art school or build a portfolio for <specific thing X> cause I don't know shit about that, this is just for creating art that you love making.

✨️Developing a style ✨️

A lot of people talk about 'finding your style', but I'm personally an advocate of developing a style - and most importantly it being a process that never stops. Now I don't know how old/experienced you are, but especially when you are just getting into art (and with 'just' I mean years) it'll change a lot because you will be improving a lot!

Now for me personally, I've been busy ~finding a style~ since I was 10. And up to like 2 years ago (I'm now 28) I was frustrated I just wasn't able to find one. Every half year or so I'd try to get back into art "for real this time", stick to one medium and general style and/or subject, and within a matter of weeks become frustrated and then not draw for a good while. That style-mentality really took a toll on the fun I had in making art, but also stunted my own artistic development. I was restricting myself at a stage where I should be everything BUT. I told myself I wasn't good enough, not cut out to be a professional, wouldn't be able to sell myself if I couldn't stick to one thing, yada yada. Great mentality. I'm now in therapy!

Anyway, what broke me free of that was a promise I made to myself back in 2020. I told myself I would get back into making art, but this time, just do what feels fun *at any given moment*. Let go of the pressure. I didn't post to socials and just shared with my friends, and eventually started posting to my then very humble Twitter following. I liked Twitter, cause there wasn't the pressure that Instagram always gave me of having to have a perfect feed. So I drew digitally, I drew with pencils, did some painting, got oil pastels, tried collage. And those experiments all influenced one or another. That's been key for me. If I feel like I hit a creative wall, I just try another medium or another CSP brush or another app on my tablet. Just experiment with lines and colors and not worry about what ends up there. (it's usually cats) Creating like this kept the fun in it for me and I've created nearly every single day since then, and that too is key to style development: Create A LOT. Don't hyperfocus on one perfect piece when you can also create 4 good-enough pieces in the same time.

Now on the topic of copying: it's a natural thing to do. Just be responsible about it! (don't share on socials if you blatantly copy something. While it's a good method to learn certain techniques, it's something that should stay in your private sketchbook) Also be sure to study from many different places, don't fixate on just a couple of artists! Find what inspires you in real life: be it buildings or nature or animals or people or objects, and try to capture them in different ways: from realistic to just the basic shapes. You'll find out what kind of style and level of detail you're naturally drawn to soon enough. Creating your own visual library in your mind by drawing many different things is ultimately what will allow you to put your ideas to paper in a quick and intuitive way. Having a (cheap!) sketchbook that you don't show anyone but just goof around in and explore everything and anything is a very helpful tool.

✨️ Generating ideas ✨️

I get my ideas from SO many different places. Many of my cat paintings were actually created to deal with a strong emotion or feeling I was having at the time.

Now externally, I get a lot of inspiration from nature and from the place I live in. I used to live in a fairly urbanized area, but it wasn't until I moved to the country side with wide and far views that I saw daily that I started getting interested in drawing landscapes. I didn't draw a lot of cats until they were chilling in my garden everyday. When I lived at home I drew a lot of fish, cause my dad had an aquarium. What you see and observe everyday matters. Taking your camera or phone on a walk in the neighborhood and capturing small details is a great way to gather inspiration, even if the area is a bit boring. I have a Fujifilm X100F that I try to carry to most places I go, cause I can quickly photograph things and I like it better than phone photography.

I also draw a lot of ideas from the media I consume: shows, movies, games, comics, music... Sometimes it just hits that inspiration button and lights a lil flame that'll turn into an idea. I love the magical worlds Studio Ghibli creates for example and the soothing calmness that games like Animal Crossing and Stardew Valley have. Things like that just work their way into my art, often subconsiously.

I also draw what I yearn for: be it a doodle of a comforting hot bowl of soup when I crave it, or a beach scene cause I want to go for a beach walk. It's fun, and lets me daydream a little about things I maybe cannot have in that moment.

Another big thing is worldbuilding and storytelling: I have this fictional world in my mind that I desperately want to get out, and it will, piece by piece.

So yeah. There's many places to grab inspiration from. Writing down what inspired you is useful. Doing it every year or so is too, cause then you'll start to see trends and get a better understanding of what drives you. Cause in the end that's what's most important, I think: Find the things that ignite a flame in you and then let it out in a way that is fun and comforting to you. Don't worry about what other people are making or that you're not making what you 'should' make!

I hope this was somewhat helpful - it was fun to write at least, I have many thoughts about this :')

#art #art process #art education #personal #ask #thoughts #learning artist #learn art #creativity #art style #illustration #infodump #tldr: have fun making what you wanna make #you're spending more time with your art than anyone else #better to make sure you're enjoying it #artists on tumblr #art resources

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evanwritesgames · 5 months

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Yaknow as a longtime itch.io lurker one thing that makes me sad is that there’s a lot of different takes on the same theme that don’t actually try to do anything new. Usually fantasy stuff. There are so so many fantasy packs that are nearly identical…

The art is fine and a lot of effort already, but it makes the assets not… stand out. Which is understandable! The point is to make something generic anyone can use! But it’s also a shame artistically because there’s little that’s unique to them, so they fade into the background easily… Plus if I need something specific I might have five packs to look through that just don’t do what I want, because they have the same take on the same theme, so I have 7 different Generic Unidentifiable Trees and Village House With Hay Roof but say no wooden cart an ox could pull. (I genuinely don’t remember seeing that as an asset before…)

Say, let’s continue on fantasy packs. I can name like one or two of them that I remember specifically because there was a variety of themes to them— going way beyond man with sword in European forest with some village and river tiles. That’s what makes me actually want to buy them! If there’s a variety in the type of characters and body types, or the kind of places you can lead your characters into (and I can repurpose this stuff even when it SOUNDS super specific! Don’t think I can’t! I grabbed underwater atlantis ruins and made it into an aquarium zoo with themed flooring… one time I made a greenhouse out of several recolored tilesets and the only thing I had to draw was glass tiles!)

I’m not here to complain. See if I want to do something unique, I CAN draw it myself… the thing is, my art is passable, but I don’t like drawing as much as coding so it’s not a great incentive. I’d rather grab something an actual artist made! Genuinely! That’s mutual benefit! So I’m not here to complain I’m just… kinda sad tbh!

When I go look at what’s new a lot of it doesn’t do anything to stand out! It’s just more trees and villages and oh this one has a slime enemy. Well. Like 2 out of 5 I saw in the past month. And they’re all blue. Rimuru come back here

Part of it is of course because I’ve been there a while, but you’d be surprised how some stuff is actually hard to find. A 16x16 4 directions dragon, for instance? I’ve only found one. Why’s no one drawing that when there’s so many 16x16 fantasy packs? (I think it’s because they’re hard to draw, which… fair. but there’s a niche there!)

One time years ago I went looking for a giant beehive environment for a part of a game I was making, and I could not for the life of me find anything, paid or not, so I drew it myself and put it out there. Recently, I noticed someone else did it too (much better than my own lol, more detail, cleaner art, they did a great job)

But like. There’s plenty of other themes that probably never see the light of day. Say, a flesh environment like you’re inside a monster, I’ve only seen a couple float by too, and at least one of them was precisely in a fantasy pack that went out its way to cover a dozen of themes. Most folks stop at the base fantasy stuff as a starting kit. There might be some here and there but I don’t think I’ve ever seen a pack intended to be set in a real city, so you can’t really make a historical game without custom assets— wouldn’t there be a lot of games you could make if you could make it look like you’re strolling in Paris in particular? There’s plenty of photo references for this stuff, but people will mostly draw something generic instead (understandably! being too specific risks not selling!). There’s a lot of gaps when everyone does the same stuff over and over, especially if it’s in almost the same way they’ve seen before.

Coz that’s what happens when you try and be generic. You match the generally accepted feel. Look at the current state of anime, you could put half a dozen isekais in the same world and the characters wouldn’t notice anything changed. The tropes barely ever vary from how they’re established. Elves are thin, pale pretty blondes with light eyes and long ears (have you ever seen a fat elf in mainstream media??). Magic is cast with mana and if you go too hard you cough blood (no one remembers tuberculosis is the origin of this trope). Young nobles all go to a magical academy (this is such a funny parody of what europe was like that it’s completely detached from reality at this point).

I find this fascinating. Not bad. Really interesting in its own way. People end up concentrating on details to be creative about and it has its own value. But it does not help anyone be super creative in the broader settings. Even the sceneries are the same, and it ends up reflecting on what you find on itch— because stories that have already been made are what artists draw inspiration from, right? It’s a cycle.

(It’s a cycle in more ways than one, the other day I saw someone compile a bunch of webtoons that re-use the same 3d model of a castle to trace in their story, because they all used the same resources to draw…!)

So, I think going out your way to do something specific makes you stand out lately, if only because there’s so much generic stuff floating around. Specific themes in a huge pack ARE often the appeal. A city isn’t just streets and doors and windows. What about bus stops and railways? Shops with their big letters out front? Parks? And every one in the real world has its own quirks too. If you draw a specific train, it’ll feel homely to someone, and like a faded vacation for someone else. A train you draw as you think about what trains look like from movies and films, or referenced as a midway point between four others, will not evoke a particularly strong feeling, it’s just the idea of a train.

Oh wow this is getting away from me. Apologies. You don’t have to post all that. Let me get back on track.

Lately on itch I noticed one artist who’s been doing a fantasy pack BUT having a fun time doing less realistic colors, and see, that makes them stand out! I actually remember them! But that’s an exception. Most don’t do that. The grass is green, the sky is blue, and winter packs (when they exist) are all white snow over forests with frozen lakes.

From my personal experience the stand out criteria for asset packs are often sheer variety/volume (not super healthy for artists but I think that’s the biggest appeal, which encourages generic takes on stuff… since you want big numbers. Still huge respect for those who actually go through with it, it’s a ton of work, especially if they do take the time to explore themes!) or personal taste (can’t actually control your audience, but say, I’ll pick up characters if I think their faces look particularly cute over more crunched up ones).

TLDR I really respect all the artists on itch but I’m sad “generic” seems to be believed to be the way to go to sell something. I’m not even sure it’s actually true. It feels like christmas whenever I find something I’ve never seen before on itch! (ouch my wallet. yes i have an asset hoarding problem.)

All that to say: I really like your art! It stood out to me from how expressive and diverse it feels! I’ll be looking at your future works~ Sorry about the ramble hahaha I spent like… an hour more on this than I intended o-O No need to post it if you don’t wanna…

Hey, don't worry about the length. I write long ass rambles, rants, and essays all the time. On letterbox'd you can see me write 10k words for movies 5 people saw. I appreciate a person who can speak at length about things and isn't afraid to follow sidebars and tangents and can and does circle back to the point effectively. Underrated skills.

This was really fascinating to read and could EASILY be reshaped into a convincing "state of the union" style essay about where things are at for this aspect of Itch. Itch does not receive much coverage the way other big internet things do, not that I know of. I have to admit though that I'm not in "the community" of itch very much. I have a weird disconnect where it's hard for me to see how and where to "join" stuff and I often find myself on the margins wondering why I can't get closer. I kinda hope the weird meta-discourse on things like Youtube never really happens to itch but if it did, I suspect reflective essays like yours here would be the higher quality material.

Anyways. It's nice to know that you appreciate what I try to do with my assets. You're bang on that "generic" seems to sell better but also comes with major caveats. I noticed there were almost no unofficial cyberpunk/scifi/future assets for RPG Maker and similar all the way back in 2001 when I first started playing with RM2K. It hasn't got much better since then and I suppose part of that may be a lack of standout, big deal indie games (particularly RPG maker games) that use these aesthetics. There is ALWAYS time for fantasy, even the generic Western Europe shit that you always see. There is also an entire subgenre of "Stardew-like" assets and games. I myself am making a take on the lifesim genre, The Hedge Wizard, but the art style is probably closer to Earthbound, Roots of Pacha, etc than to Stardew. You can see some of the material from that on my tumblr if you're keen.

My personal fantasy theme, The Nine Realms, on itch, is Norse inspired and does feature diverse characters for the exact reasons you highlight. I think the fantasy genre and JRPGs have a long history of racism, some of it very mild and some of it not at all. The kind of person who looks at my Nine Realms stuff and goes "black vikings? wtf" is a person I don't want anywhere near me or my work. They're not only factually incorrect assuming Europe was some kind of white fortress, but they're missing the point. I'm glad you get it because it means someone does. You may be interested to know that Nine Realms basically does not sell. I periodically work on it still because I have a big plan for it (including a take on elves I think you'll like) but it's a passion project. I think it would sell better if I was more holistic in my approach to what assets to include (one piece of advice I got was that it should include "farmsim" stuff and I see why but haven't been especially moved to get into that). In the very cynical and depressed part of my brain, I assume racism and "anti-woke" sentiment is part of the reason it doesn't sell too. I deliberately drew a line in the sand, a thing I do often on principle, and I can handle the consequences. Like you, I am often fascinated by these things, especially how tropes work.

At the end of the day, artists are on itch for different reasons. There's a small community of pixel artists who specifically do itch stuff and there's a split between those who buy into the hustle mindset, the personal brand, all that shit, and people who do not. I do not. I know it means I'm "less successful" but the far end of the more hustle-oriented artists are people who analyze Youtube metrics and exploit children for money (people don't like to admit or consider that the internet's demographics have fundamentally changed) creep me the fuck out and I won't be part of that.

Would love a link to the fantasy artist you mention. Always looking for people to follow on itch. I also tend to like unorthodox color choices. I played a game a while back that was basically a top down Soulslike made out of scribbles. Can't remember the title and google is of no help as usual. Haha. Anyway, that one was cool.

Last thing I'll say for now is that I do have something new coming, a new theme, that is all in b&w or grayscale. I've teased it a bit but let me know if you want the full pitch and I can lay it out. It's the thing called Retro Dead City. Might be a big enough hint right there. Haha.

Thank you for showing so much interest in me and my work. I really appreciate it and enjoy conversations like this.

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cure-typhoon · 9 months

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did you ever make anything for that 'davekat teen beach movie au idea'. It's been almost half a year since that post but I had never seen Teen Beach Movie until about 2 days ago. All I could think about was that au idea

Sorry it took a while to answer but i was in a three day event and i wanted to draw something for it sooo badly

Okey so i watched teen beach movie like YEARS ago when i was a kid/teen, i think i watched when i was like 12 lmao and I haven't thinked of this au in years either lol

Okey so Karkat would be Mckenzie, Dave would be Brady but their roles are kind of reverse, like Karkat would be the fan of the movie but he wants to escape but kind of dont?? because he wants to see the movie from close

Meanwhile Dave is Brady and while he is enjoying the place he wants to leave too, but wants to spend the little time he has with Karkat considering he will leave

The ones which i had more problems where with Lila and Tanner, im still not sure of them , while i drew Nepeta and Feferi, im not entirely sure?? lmao but that was the idea i had years ago

Anyway when i was thinking of why i went Tanner=Beach=Feferi and with Nepeta i was thinking of Equius as Butchy lol

If you have better options send an ask because im very undecisive of who those two could be, i also had Jade as Lila as an option and Nepeta as Tanner too

#homestuck #karkat vantas #dave strider #feferi peixes #nepeta leijon #jade harley #teen beach movie au #my art

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wastelandhell · 1 year

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Thank you so much @bokatan and @h3raklion for the tag!

I can tell this is going to become a patented Furby wall of text™ so I'll just throw in a cut now. tl;dr: I love you all and i draw danse way too much

This has been an interesting year mostly in that its my first time posting personal art online in, what, 7 years? I stopped doing this kind of drawing shortly after high school. I picked up painting flash and have been focusing on my tattooing since then. In that time I never did any digital drawing or character drawing until 2 years ago this month, when I drew Val for the first time.

I was terrified to post anything anywhere, I think I posted one piece to reddit, but besides that I kept everything pretty private until April of 2022. I originally made this blog as a place to silently post my drawings and screenshots while providing a sort of devlog of my mods for my own records, and didn't think I would be noticed. I didn't realize people tracked the paladin danse tag, lol!

I'm really glad for all the people I've met through here, I never would have kept this blog up if it weren't for the wonderful messages from all of you guys. So much of my art, both in subject and execution has been influenced by the other users I've had the pleasure of interacting with and I hope to keep it up this year!

You all know I mostly just draw Val and Danse, and this is the palette I use for most things:

These are all pretty drab, I use different of blending layers and photoshop adjustments to get the colours how I want them at the end.

I usually try to use different brushes in each of my drawings, but these are the ones I come back to most often. The first one is a variant of one of these brushes, I modified it to change size based on direction and tilt. I used the brush almost exclusively until august and its still my favourite for quickly laying out forms and values. I use this one for freckles. The rest are some of my top picks from True Grit Texture Supply, mostly from Chromagraph and Monomania.

I'm glad I was able to really get into drawing this year, and going through my folder I'm pleased with how my anatomy and faces have improved. However I am disappointed in how much of it is just the same ginger fuck. I'm really stunting my growth by not varying my subjects, and now that I'm more comfortable with the tools I want to push myself to actually. uh. try. Put in the effort to make art that says something, tells a story. Less single characters floating in blank voids. More people interacting, scenes, environments. I also really want to get back into digital painting, I used to be really into digital painting and in theory know how to do it. I'm going to try and dig out that old knowledge lol.

Despite being bit bland, and having some glaring errors that still bug me, that Danse drawing is still one of my favourites. I think I spent at least 8 hours on it. I was dealing with some personal issues at the time and just really wanted to scratch that brain itch that the bos knight uniform gives me. It's stupid, I hate it, I can draw it nearly completely from memory by how often I'm looking at it.

The 'tried something new' panel is difficult because I feel like a lot of my recent work has been pretty stagnant. It's all done with the same technique, same palette, same boring cel shading, same layer order, boring. This is one of the few times I did any proper digital painting, and tried to adapt the looser style that I use when I'm drawing in analogue mediums to my digital work.

I just talked about art here and not mods because that would be a whole other wall of text. But it would boil down to: love to do it, no time, and expensive.

Also, if anybody is interested, I do my drawing in Clip Studio Paint and Photoshop on a Surface Laptop Studio.

#i do not expect anyone to read all that i just like hearing myself talk #er...you know what i mean

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halfusek · 2 years

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Since the new Chris Portal documentary showed the true and nasty side of KB/Mike and TheMeatly, are you still gonna Say "we don't know the full story"?. We as a fanbase were treated as shitty as the employees they fired and abused, they don't deserve respect anymore.

uh i dont know where you've been but that video hasn't uncovered much new to me aside from some details from the two interviews near the end of the vid but like all of that stuff has already been known, it is just the first instance of someone compiling it into a coherent video (like the stupid games for kids said by mike we already knew in 2019 which i would not exactly say is the same as experiencing work abuse lol)

and idk why you're being so hostile at me, i've never been one to defend mike nor meatly but tried to find and share as much of the information as i could find about their wrongdoings, like dude i was fucking there pointing out that a lot of employees dont have "kindlybeast employee" in their twitter bios which then got screenshot and that post went on reddit where actual ex employees started sharing stuff (which freaked me out cuz i didnt want to have my "face" on the post dedicated to that) so like maybe turn that down a little

i feel like there's a lot of people new to some things unraveling in this controversy but as for me i've already made up my mind what i think of it, so i'm not so up in arms to scream about things that we already screamed about 2-3 years ago and that might make people think that i don't care or wanna brush it off which is not true

kindly beast / joey drew studios inc / mike and meatly deserve all the criticism aimed towards them, and on the day it was known about the lawsuit i laughed that karma finally got to them because i had thoughts "for all the shit they did to people, they deserve to fail and lose everything, to start over"

but i also think this is an opportunity for them to improve, learn and do better, sooooo i'm just kind of waiting for the next thing to happen i guess

in case they don't improve, welp, they can honestly fuck off

death of the author, whatever, it is anyone's personal call if they wanna keep on supporting some creators or not, and well as for me i think there's so much more and worse stuff that we (we as... gaming community... fandoms...?) tolerate that this seems just... small in comparison. i'm NOT saying it's not a big deal, it has me wishing lowkey that i just wasn't into batim lmao so i could just go. like for example i'm much more disgusted at sc/ott caw/thons wrongdoings cause they actually influence politics so i'm actively trying to keep myself away from engaging with fnaf or that one pirate gay show that i was like holy shit a cool gay couple but then read some yikes things about a character being based on actual real life guy who was a slave owner and that just had me nope out. i guess what i'm saying is i try not to support problematic things but if i were to suport only those purely unproblematic thatd kinda leave me with nothing idk society capitalism something something so you know i just try to weigh if something is actively harmful to people or if there is something that happened that i absolutely cannot forgive and based on that i get into something or not

does that make me a hypocrite? maybe but if i focus on boycotting what matters in the grand scheme of things and indulge a little in indie game fandom that's rapidly losing popularity i think i can personally live with that

sorry for going off about this, truth be told there's a lot of things happening in the world right now that put me in a very doomer mode lmao i mean we all see whats happening, shits pretty fucked and it was hard for me to even spare some focus on this, its really not good to get so desensitized so i also apologize for the harsh tone but yeah

anyways, i agree that we should make them feel like they need to apologize and do better, meatly still havent said a word publicly about anything that has happened and that fucking sucks

i still do not like harassing them over releasing batdr, thats part of crunch culture and all that jazz and i think we shouldnt lower the standards for that for anyone because [insert that image of you doing something bad to someone you dislike but it deflecting into someone you like]

but we should keep them on their toes and not let them think that we will just forget and let them get away with it because wow they've been massive assholes

#its funny because even chris portals first video was late to the controversy in my eyes #(understandably tho cuz it was long and that sort of stuff takes time to make)#it is a good video and i recommend watching it esp if you are a batim fan #sorry it got so long and weird i am in a . . . . . . state #halfask

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star-firework · 1 year

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wow, i watched a clip of paramore's song for twilight and it oddly threw me into nostalgia memory mode

i was in 7th grade and i remember hearing all the girls in my class talk about twilight and so i decided to pick up a book

but it was new moon and only once was i half way into it i realized "hey this might be the 2nd book...............and why i dont know whats happening" or i figured i could assume, idk

i still really liked it and so i picked up the first book

oh FUCK i was HOOKED, i would wake up at 4 am before school just to read!!!!!! I also had just discovered nico nico douga and so i would play the medley songs and read fjdsklfjsl

i mentioned i would wake up to read and teachers thought i was a smart kid finally but little did they know i was just reading twilight

then i would search fanart or anything i could to get visuals since the movie was only announced and no previews released

i found stephenie meyers blog and would read whatever i could, later on I remember she had the rough draft of the only just released edward book?? I remember reading it in 2007!!! so crazy!! its like food fight (2012)

once the trailer was released, i was a bit disappointed in how they looked, much diff than how i imagined, especially jacob!!!!! idk, i thought jacob in the first movie had such a distracting wig on so i didnt like his design LOL the later movies i was like hell YES

i was a jacob girl and my mom became a edward girl after the movies

i got the first round of twilight shirt merch with alice on it and a thin ass jacket with twilight on the back. alice's hair was becoming popular and i really wanted it too. I think I ended up getting her cut but obviously her hair is styled so my hair instead just looked like an avon lotion MLM sales lady...

The next few movies my mom was actually the one who would get us midnight screening tickets with her friend. i didnt even have to ask LOL! she was so into it, such a phenomenon

afterwards we would hit the kind-of-waffle-house and try to get sleep before school. For some reason couldnt miss it even tho we were out til 2 or 3 am lol

those years were such a rough, terrible, traumatic time in my life but the obsessions and internet roaming was some of the best times and memories.

i was also into gaia and would love walking around on the world, seeing cake-kun frozen on the waterfountain in the town square, and try to make friends and get a cool avi outfit

i remember someone named super? saia neko chan or something, i always thought of the shipping company, SAIA, and now I work w receiving from SAIA LOL, not a coincidence but a funny thought

iscribble.net was also around, i would DREAM, LITERALLY DREAM, of getting the full permission of all the tools once i drew enough or something like that. I was obsessed and would also wake up at 3-4 am just to draw. I wish wish WISH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i had screen recorded the loading screen of my oldest draw room, "epic girls only"

we made an effort to never clear the board and let it have a history, an archive of our art. it would take foreeeeeeeeeevvvvverrrrrr but it was always so fun to watch our art over the years flash by and be erased and redrawn. there really wont be a time like that again i think, same with pretty much all the early internet era stuff like first era of youtube, tumblr, and twitter. they were just soooo different. tumblr wasnt callouty. youtube would let you edit the design of your channel like myspace and it was the best, the comments i would interact w were also different. I am now having kids today talk to my comments i made at their age on the same videos!??@?@?@ thats so crazy

a my melody opening video i commented on in 2007 or something is still up and so just a few months ago, young kids replied to the comment asking if i still am alive or old loooooooooooool so cool!!!!

interacting w the past and future in one

#blogpost #me thinking #twilight

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thegrapeandthefig · 2 years

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Ask game : Q2, Q4 & Q6! 🏛🌿

2: How long have you been practicing Hellenism? I just passed the 8-year mark a few months ago.

4: Have you had a liking in Greek mythology since you were a kid? If so, does it influence your practice? Yes and no. Yes as in “I found it interesting and enjoyed it through the lens of works like Asterix & Obelix” but no because I was never what you would call a mythology buff and had much more interest in the Egyptian civilization and religion as a kid than I did the Greek one. In fact, when I started my studies at Uni I was slightly annoyed that the first year didn’t include Roman history and only focused on the Greek side. Needless to say that quickly changed lol

6: What drew you to Hellenism? What made you choose it over anything else? @verdantlyviolet I know you asked this one too Happy accidents? Again, I was initially more drawn to the Roman side of things and that mainly switched because Dionysus. I think I didn’t quite “vibe” as well with Dionysus-Liber as I did with the Greek Dionysus and that’s how I ended up choosing a side and staying there. But that initial context also explains why I’m less interested in worshipping pre-roman annexation eras. While my personal calendar was made using a 4th century BC inscription, it also includes elements that date to the imperial period.

#ask game

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orphic-exe-archived · 2 months

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(SRRY THIS IS A LOT LONGER THAN I EXPECTED IT TO BE WHEN WRITING. TAKE UR TIME ) (Taking “ask as many questions as you like” and running with it /silly) same anon from before again again. idk kind of rant incoming bcuz i don’t much much of anywhere else to! im sort of questioning being plural but with a big question mark there bcuz it could honestly just be my gender changing too much and the identity crisis 💔 and i feel like for every symptom i have there’s at least 2 more i dont. my gender fluctuates enough already but sometimes specific genders or pronouns seem to come with certain name preferences and moods (to which I’ve always referred to as different “vibes” because that’s the only way i figured to describe things). but each of these sort of “vibes” have started to actually feel like different ppl and ive started to mess around with acknowledging them separately and it does feel nice. im also realizing that even though i don’t hear any distinct voices or anything in my mind, when i think to myself it’s more of actual back and forth conversation than is normal from what ive asked some friends? i never have amnesia at all (other than the usual forgetfulness i have which is very minor) but sometimes ill do things that don’t feel like. myself? like ill forget I drew/posted/wrote something for a bit but when I see it again i remember. and I know i did it, I was there, doing it, even though i feel like it wasn’t me. and not like im not in control of my body when I do it either cuz I very much remember doing it i just dont see why or what my thought process was. i have a whiteboard in my room where I’ve started making doodles of whatever feels like “myself” at any certain time and they’re all kind of similar but still feel like distinct. ppl. and again i physically remember drawing the other ones but it’s still weird. but most of this is just me I guess, because I don’t think i ever act particularly different online or irl around other ppl, it’s always just things i observe when im alone. i also know i have problems with symptoms of things I think I might have only appearing after I overthink it but maybeeeeeee it’s just im noticing it more? probably not. oh also before I forget I’ve also never actually dissociated or anything (at least to my understanding of an out of body experience type of thing. (Well actually I did once and remember it very clearly but that was several years ago when I hadn’t slept for much longer than usual)). its just normal zoning out for me i guess. anyways idk where i was rlly going with this and ik everyone’s experiences r different and obviously strangers on the internet can’t diagnose me with anything but I just wanted to say something ^-^ thank u for reading if u did lol

hey man! i can get that it’s stressful to figure all this out. if it helps, our experiences are pretty similar! our syscovery started with name preferences, feeling really different, and pronoun/gender identity preferences fluctuating. it sounds to me like you could very well be plural!

like you said, i can’t diagnose you with anything. however, there are some ways to try and log your headmates/alters/parts (whatever you’d prefer them called)! for example, the website simplyplural (we don’t use but many systems do) or the pluralkit bot on discord (if you use discord!) these softwares can do things like track your switches, log your headmates with names, pronouns, and descriptions, and more.

there’s no harm in giving those helpful resources a try, especially if you’re seriously considering this possibility. if you have a therapist/some form of professional help, it would be really good to bring these feelings up with them as well.

for now, keep doing what you’re already doing, possibly dabble in simplyplural or pluralkit (or another resource i didn’t list — any notes app could work as well)

i’m gonna start calling you “system questioning anon” in case you have any more questions to send me, as long as you don’t mind!

i also have to apologize— all three of these asks were answered by three different headmates (kumo, oliver, and myself (olly) in chronological order.)

#olly #system questioning anon #not maintagging this #this ask is a lot more personal #vixy plEASE STOP CURSING AT ME I DIDNT WRITE THE THING ABOUT YOU FUCKING UP OUR HEIGHT #THAT WAS OLIVER I SWEAR

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fangirlexpress · 1 year

Text

December 2022 Book Review (Part 1)

Believe it or not, I do have interests outside of the One Chicago & Grey's Anatomy fandoms lol One of my favorite pastimes is reading. I usually have an old-fashioned "tree" book in hand. I adore the written word. Fiction is my jam. Escaping into a fantasy world where anything is possible feels amazing!

I thought every once in a while, I'd share my thoughts about the books I'm reading. Please feel free to chime in with your opinions as well. I'd love to hear about your own favorite books. Oh, and send me some recs if you can!

I have read 16 total novels in the month of December. I am pretty sure I won't finish any more before the year is up but here is the first of two lists with a few thoughts on each book. Thanks for checking out this post & come back soon please for Part 2.

Dread on Arrival

I've read 2 or 3 other books in this series, and not one of them has impressed me. Like, at all. But this one was by far the worst of the bunch. The plot was terrible. There were about 200 hundred characters to try to remember, and if it was supposed to be a murder mystery, where was the damned murder, huh? It didn't happen until almost 70% through the book and the denouement was shoddily wrapped up. The best part about this book? Finishing it! I will not be reading anymore Claudia Bishop books from here on out.

Mary Anne's Bad-Luck Mystery

So, I have a little confession to make. I am an incurable "Baby-sitters Club" addict. There is no fix for me. I am hopeless as I am way past my tween years but still reading these books with no end in sight. My dream is to be Ann M. Martin and invent a series with characters as iconic and amazing as Kristy, Mary Anne, Claudia, and the rest of the gang. I mean, if only...

But I digress. We're here to talk about Mary Anne and her Bad Luck. This was actually one of the rare books I'd never read before and while I enjoyed it for the most part, I thought it paled in comparison to the epic spookiness of The Ghost at Dawn's House (book # 9). That book had meat and depth & moved important story forward. This was pretty silly, and kind of felt like a whole lot of something about nothing. But hey, not every book needs to be deep and heavy like War and Peace, right?

Author Day

Speaking of Ann M. Martin, it was only about a year ago that I learned she wrote a spin-off series to the "Baby-sitters Club Little Sister" series called “The Kids in Ms. Colman's Class”. (Color me shocked that I did not know everything about my bookish idol lol) This was a very short-lived series. I think it has maybe 12 or 13 books and it follows (as the series title suggests) the kids in Ms. Colman’s class. They are the fellow classmates of the precocious Karen Brewer who is Kristy Thomas’s stepsister (Kristy is, as most people know, the founder & president of the BSC).

The series is very pedestrian, very dry, and pretty darn generic. I honestly wonder if Ann even really wrote it herself, or if one of her ghostwriters did. It’s full of lazy storytelling. The plot of this one is so thin, it’s almost invisible. I honestly only gave it 3 stars out of loyalty to the BSC franchise. I know. Bad me, bad me. I can see why the series did not take off. Ann (or her ghostwriter, or whomever) did not even try to give these kids unique personalities. It’s a shame too because it could have been a cool concept for the pre-tween crowd of the 90's.

The Mystery at Lilac Inn

Ahh my Nancy Drew. Now there’s another series I really like & grew up with. Nancy is such a cool character, always so quick on her feet and ready to tackle any mystery that comes her way. I also like that she’s truly sympathetic to the hardships that befall the misfortunate in these books & always willing to make things right for the people the best way she knows how. If Ann M. Martin is my real-life bookish idol, then Ms. Drew is my fictional one. Oh, to be like that fearless titan blonde snoop!

This book in particular was pretty exciting to read. Our pal Nancy got into some big trouble. There were some vicious baddies, including a Nancy doppelganger! There was danger galore. Sweet Helen Corning (my favorite of Nancy’s sidekicks) was around. I was a pretty happy camper. A solid read for sure.

The Family Remains This is the follow-up to the hit bestseller The Family Upstairs. I was hypnotized by that book. It had me on the edge of my seat, furiously turning pages, excited to see what would come next. This book? Not so much. It wasn't bad. Not at all. But I felt Jewell tried too hard to 1) preach to her readers & 2) wrap things up in a neat little bow, thus forsaking a lot of excitement and drama in the process. Truthfully, I read psychological thrillers for well, the thrill, and for the insanity of it all, and there wasn't a ton of either here. It was kind of a letdown and I'm wondering if Jewell should have left well enough alone with just the one book. Not every loose end needs to be tied up. In real life, things stay tangled sometimes.

Stacey’s Mistake Another day, another BSC read, but honestly, I didn’t enjoy this one very much, to be honest. I am not a big fan of the books where the girls have their feet on each other’s necks, and that was certainly the case here pretty much from beginning to nearly the end. Obviously, teen girls are gunna teen girl, & fight. That’s a given, but they get so mean about it, you gotta wonder why they even hang out sometimes. Plus, I found some of the characterizations off. Confidant, self-assured Cali girl Dawn suddenly was scared of her own shadow? Did not compute. It was just a weird book all around. Again, I rated it a 3 simply out of loyalty to the BSC franchise, but it’s far from my fave book in the series.

Spirit of the Season

I read a review from someone that said this was the “worst book ever written”. While I can’t totally agree (that dubious “honor” actually belongs to the 50 Shades books *sorry Christian Grey fans!*), it is pretty bad. What do you call a Christmas tale without charm, warmth, whimsy, humor, or joy? Crap. Spirit of the Season was utter crap! Sticky crap oozing on the sidewalk. I think I’ve read Michaels before. She was never Shakespeare, but she wasn’t bad… Was she?

The main character in this was so selfish and rude. The way she kept verbally attacking the help at her late grandmother’s bed and breakfast was awful. And they’d forgive her simply because of her stress and “low blood sugar”. Like, no, no. Girl’s a beeyotch, that doesn’t fly with me. There was zero romantic chemistry between her and her new beau. Their insta-love was pathetic. I enjoy a good romance like nobody’s business, but this wasn't it. So, if you’re looking for a holiday read next year, do yourself a favor and don't pick up this one!

Cut

How do you rate a book like Cut? It’s such an important topic. I read the writer spent something like 3 years researching the topic before she wrote it. That's a serious commitment. This was short, almost too short, but still powerful with a fairly hopeful ending. Maybe too hopeful. Do things ever wrap up that easily in real life? Still, the prose was sparse and strong. While it was not quite on the level of a book like Speak (though that also has a too-convenient ending), it was still very readable and relatable. I would recommend it to all teens.

And that's it for now, folks. I will have the second & final part of my December book reviews up in a few days. Thanks for checking this out!

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thefoxandthepenguine · 3 years

Text

Flashback (Pt. 3)

Leigh Shaw x Reader

Summary: How Leigh and reader turned from acquaintances to lovers after Matt died (plot based on the original drama).

Pairing: Leigh Shaw x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Smut (18+ only), fluff, angst (a little only), praise kink, fingering (r giving and receiving) and oral (r receiving), cursing [Please lemme know if I miss anything]

Word count: 3.5k

a/n: Yea well I finally managed to write a smut for this. It’s so difficult working on a smut and I hope you will find it sweet and hot at the same time lol (that’s how I’m trying to make it feel like). I think we’ll have 2 to 3 more chapters to go, so please lemme know if you want to be tagged. Thanks for all your support. ❤️

Part 3

1 year and 7 months ago

Leigh was sitting on the edge of her bed angrily. She had absolutely no idea why Jules was being so difficult recently. Mom and she had been up whole night, waiting for her just to finish that stupid gingerbread house. Why couldn’t she just apologize for being late and they could all finish that shit together, pretending everything was okay for Christmas?

Christmas this year was already suffocating enough without Matt, and Jules was just making it even worse.

Leigh felt irritated...annoyed. She tapped her foot subconsciously on the floor as she scrolled through her phone to find someone to talk to－to complain to.

Not Drew. He turned off his phone and went to bed at 10 for his beauty sleep. Such a grandpa. Leigh rolled her eyes at that.

And definitely not Danny. This emoji conversation was just getting better with him. She would not want to go through the searching and pursuing all over again. And to be honest, she was still figuring out a way to get along with him after his confession.

And well...there were not many options left. She knew deep down that she was picky and sometimes...just sometimes she could be difficult to deal with. Especially after Matt’s death.

Her finger paused when she saw Y/N’s name on the screen. The bubble stopped popping out a week ago, with Y/N’s last attempt to start a conversation with her by commenting on the new donut shop a few blocks away from Beauty Beast. And there were no new messages from her ever since.

That was exactly what she wanted, wasn’t it? She knew she had built a barrier between Y/N and her. She built it on purpose, and she was the one who pulled away first.

She knew she was being impossible, but the idea of not hearing from Y/N haunted her.

Why did everyone just stop calling and texting after a period of time? First Danny then Y/N.

Why did everyone just break their promises?

Why was everyone leaving her?

She was pissed. She thought for a moment, and just grabbed her keys and went out to her car.

It must be EMT doing the thing on her brain.

You knew you were in over your head.

You were laying on the couch, feeding yourself with ice-cream and popcorn while watching ‘Love Actually’ on Netflix.

You knew you were in over your head by the fact that watching ‘Love Actually’ did not make you feel any better.

Maybe watching a romantic movie alone with Christmas coming was the last thing you needed. Your mind kept drifting to the night you spent with Leigh in Palm Springs whenever you were alone.

You had not talked to her much since your night together. You tried to send her a message from time to time, most of them were trivial and casual topics you could think of. She would reply eventually, but usually one to two days after you tried to start the conversation, and it mostly ended with one sentence or so.

And to make things worse, she left the studio once the sessions ended and you never got the chance to talk to her. The irregular donut date no longer existed anymore without any doubt. Even if you sat at your usual spot for four consecutive weeks.

You tried to give her the time and space needed to process what you had said to her. But you guessed you did not need to be a genius to know her answer now. So you stopped texting her a week ago. It was not like you gave up on her, no－but you just did not want her to feel like being bothered, if not harassed, until you could come up with a better way to deal with this whole thing.

Maybe you should not have made the first move to kiss her.

Maybe you should not have pushed her too fast, too far.

Maybe you could still be in each other’s life without letting those words spill out of your mouth.

Maybe it was better to have a part of her than not to have her in your life.

Maybe you just wanted too much.

You sighed.

Being sober was definitely not helping at all. You needed some distraction now that you were alone.

You were grabbing another bottle of beer from the fridge when someone knocked on your door. You set the bottle on the kitchen counter and frowned when you looked over the clock on the wall. Who would possibly pay a visit to you at 11 without a heads-up in advance?

“Coming!”

To say you were shocked to see Leigh standing at your door would be an understatement.

“Hey.” Leigh slipped into your apartment once you opened the door.

“Ugh-hi,” you gestured to the air before closing the door, “by all means, please come in.”

You turned around to face Leigh, brows frowning, still very confused and shocked by her presence in your apartment. “What are you-how do you know my address?”

“Your application form for Beauty Beast.” Leigh pursed her lips and ran her hands on her hair, slightly embarrassed by her own answer.

Okay, that was definitely not what you were expecting when you filled out those forms. Not that you were complaining though.

“Oh.” You were not sure what to say next so you said nothing at all.

It was odd. Until Leigh broke the silence.

“Why did you stop texting?” Leigh had her hands on hip and stared at you, eyebrows raised waiting for your reply.

“I-I ugh, well I don’t want you to feel...overwhelmed, or pressured to reply to me.” You were taken aback by her question, not sure why she even cared or what kind of answer she was expecting. But still you answered wholeheartedly.

“So you decided to stop reaching out for me without asking?” Leigh scoffed and you were starting to feel a bit annoyed.

God! She could be so infuriating sometimes. She was the one to leave you out in the cold and now she was blaming you for not reaching out? She could not be serious. “I thought you made yourself pretty clear by showing no interest in replying or seeing my face at all.”

“I did reply to you!” Leigh walked closer to you, hands throwing in the air.

“What? Like 3 times a week? Wow that’s a lot! Do you know a conversation takes 2 to go on?” You sniffed in annoyance.

“I still replied!”

You suddenly realized how close you were standing from each other. Despite yourself, you were doomed the moment you looked into Leigh’s emerald eyes, even if they were glaring at you.

All you wanted five minutes ago was to have Leigh back into your life. Here she was now, standing right in front of you, literally asking you to talk to her again. What else could you ask for? So why ruin everything by shouting at each other?

“Okay! I’m sorry Leigh. I’ll text you starting from tomorrow. Are we good?” You surrendered by letting out a deep breath.

“Yea…I think so.” Leigh seemed not to be quite expecting a sudden change in your attitude. She just blinked a few times in surprise when looking at you.

“Great.” You nodded to her. “Is that why you came to my house at midnight? Just to ask me to text you back?”

The silenced tension was creeping in again.

“Do you have any plans for tonight?” Leigh looked around at your apartment to take a brief look at it, and finally turned around to meet your gaze. Avoiding your question by asking you a new one.

“What? No, ugh-it’s already 11. My plan is to finish the movie and go to sleep...why?” You glanced at the television screen behind Leigh, without noticing her closing the distance between the two of you.

“Nice then.”

She cupped your face and pressed a heated kiss to you. Your breath hitched for a brief second and your heart pounding fiercely at that sensation. Of all the things that you had imagined since Leigh made her appearance at your place, her taking the initiative to kiss you was the last thing that came to your mind.

However, it did not take you long to kiss her back. You missed the way her lips felt on yours. You had replayed the kisses that you shared repeatedly in your mind, and every time you thought of it, it just made you want Leigh more. To savour her all over again.

You tightened your grip on her waist and kept stepping backwards until you felt the couch behind you. Leigh was melting into your arms, basically clinging to you when you moved across the room.

Leigh straddled on your laps when you fell on the couch, your lips finally parting for the first time. “Are you drinking?” Leigh sat back from your kiss and locked her gaze with you, both of you still panting against each other.

You nodded without saying anything, your head still a bit dumb to come up with something to respond.

“I missed this,” her cheeks flushed while she was pecking on your lips, her hands holding your face, “and I think I need this.” Your heart fluttered as you felt her warmth in your arms and at the affection she displayed to you.

But a tiny nagging voice in the back of your brain told you to stop. That this was wrong. It took you like a month to have Leigh back to your life after the last time you had sex with her. You would not want to make the same mistake again.

As if she could sense your hesitation to respond to her kisses, Leigh sat back and started unbuttoning her shirt quickly. Her gaze did not waver and you could not move your eyes from her. You held your breath and that poor little voice just vanished right away.

You could feel the fire lifting up in the pit of your stomach.

The shirt was loosely hanging over her shoulder when Leigh was done with the last button. You guided her arms out of the sleeves and dropped it somewhere on the floor.

You were mesmerized by the way Leigh sat on your thighs in her bra and jeans, her eyes darkened with lust, her cheeks reddened with pleasure and her chest rising heavily with anticipation. Everything about her just turned you on.

You just wanted her.

You pressed a kiss on her bare shoulder. You lingered for a while before running your tongue along her throat and collarbone until you reached the swells of her breasts.

Leigh gasped and you could feel her breath quickened. She ran her hands into your hair, tangling your locks gently and arching her back towards you.

You smirked and obliged the unspoken command willingly. You nudged the bra upwards and squeezed her breasts eagerly. Leigh moaned in pleasure the moment she felt your hands on her.

“Y/N…”

Your eyes screwed shut when your name split out from Leigh’s lips. The way she moaned your name drove you wild. You needed more of it.

You licked your lips, leaned down and captured one of her nipples into your mouth. “Fuck,” a whimper fell from Leigh as she grabbed your hair tighter involuntarily and it was beginning to hurt. Not that you cared. It actually spurred you on to know you could have this effect on her.

You began to graze your tongue over her hardened nipple, gently at first, then suckled on it avidly, and you kept alternating the actions with your tongue. Everything about her was intoxicating. You could probably do this all night if she would let you. You could feel her arms clasped around your head, pushing you closer to her.

“St-stop teasing Y/N,” Leigh moaned and rested her head over yours.

You chuckled softly against her nipple and earned a slap on your shoulder. You started kissing back to Leigh's neck following the trail that you made earlier and bit the soft skin there gently.

Your free hands lowered to start undoing the buttons to her jeans. It did not take you long and when you were done unbuttoning all of them, you tugged at the waistband and Leigh lifted herself up a little to help you pull them off.

You leaned back to the couch to take a better look at her. Your eyes trailed from her breasts, down to her stomach and finally her core. And there she was, panting heavily with her bra over her breasts and a red laced thong. You just realized that the lingerie was a match.

Your fingertips roamed over the bare skin of her inner thighs gently. Leigh’s breath hitched when you reached her heated core through her thong.

“You come here prepared,” you bit on your lower lips, brows raised in amusement when you finally tore your gaze from her lingerie to look into her eyes, “and you are already so wet.”

“Shut up! Did I mention that you always talk too mu-shit!” Leigh was cut off sharply as you pressed on her sensitive core. Hard.

You wanted to make her see stars in this sweet moment.

You giggled and lifted your head to kiss her but Leigh pulled away slightly just to make herself out of reach. You let out a low groan and were about to protest when her fingertip grazed your cheeks and leaned down to meet your lips halfway. The kiss was hot and searing. You could feel your own wetness pooling in your lower belly.

You loved this feeling. Having sex with Leigh was great beyond words, but this kind of intimacy she showed towards you made your heart full. You just simply could not hold your smile.

You did not tell Leigh, but you needed this too. You needed her.

You did not want to push your luck by testing Leigh’s, or your own patience, so you ran your fingers along her centre through the cloth. You released a moan in sync with Leigh against each other’s lips as you could literally feel how wet and hot she was.

For you.

You could not hold it any longer. You pushed the thong aside and slid a finger easily into her dripping folds. Leigh cried in pleasure and bucked her hips involuntarily to feel more fiction.

You pulled back to capture Leigh into your eyes. She looked ravished and sexy.

“You look beautiful,” you could not help but let those words spill from your lips, “the most beautiful person that I’ve ever met.”

“Don’t-fuck…” Leigh tried to complete her sentence between her breaths, but was cut off as you added another finger inside her and started to massage her clit with your thumb simultaneously.

Leigh tightened her grip on your shoulder and began to grind down onto your palm hard and fast, lifting and lowering her hips as she rode your finger. She was desperately chasing her own orgasm.

You could feel her walls clenching around your fingers as her orgasm was getting closer. You buried your face in the crook of her neck and muffled, “tell me who makes you feel good like this.”

Leigh tugged her lips between her teeth and you could just hear the guttural moan. You did not want to torture or tease her, but to give her everything she needed at the moment. “Would you answer the question for me?” You pleaded softly to her ears, believing Leigh would buy it more in this way. “Please?”

“You...Y/N…”

And you were right. Luckily you were burying your face in her neck so Leigh could not see the grin on your face. You were pretty sure she would shut her mouth up immediately if she saw your smile.

“Good girl. You’re doing great,” you cooed.

The rest was much easier once Leigh made her first try. The room was filled with her desperate voice moaning your name. It was as erotic and as intimate as it could be.

You continued pumping and curling your fingers until Leigh reached her climax. Her body tensed and thighs trembled as the pleasure washed over her. You pushed her over the edge as Leigh rested her forehead against yours, still panting.

When she could finally come down from her high, you gently pulled your fingers out of her and a small whimper was released from Leigh. You brought the fingers to your own lips and cleaned the soaked fingers by sucking them one by one. You looked squarely into Leigh’s emerald eyes, making sure she watched your every movement as you put on the show.

Leigh wrapped her arms around your neck, leaning down to place her lips over yours lazily. Your tongue swiping her lower lips when she pressed herself completely to you.

“That’s...wow.” Leigh finally caught her breath and settled herself next to you on the couch. You already miss the heat once in your arm. “How come you’re still fully dressed?”

“I thought you’re going to save the best for last.” You flashed a shit-eating grin to her and Leigh rolled her eyes when she was getting down on her knees.

“I’m not sure if this is going to be the last, but you’re definitely not wearing any of these now.”

“Oh!” Leigh was tugging at your thong and pajamas, trying to pull them down when you suddenly let out an exclamation.

“What?” Leigh looked at you in worry, her hands halting for a few seconds.

“You admit the best part!” You could not hold your grin and smiled like a kid who finally got her candy.

Leigh did not reply but simply continued her work in removing everything you were wearing in your lower bottom. You panicked. Maybe you just crossed her line and you would never want her to stop or leave. Not after everything you had.

You were going to apologize when Leigh tossed your pants and undergarment over her shoulder and looked at you like she was going to devour you. “I wonder if you can talk so much in a minute.”

You knew you did not need to.

Leigh slid her palm between your knees and parted them, fingers moving purposely slow along your inner thighs, looking at your core with lust-driven eyes. “I think you’re ready.”

You were a bit embarrassed. You knew how wet you were now after listening to Leigh’s filthy moan and pushing her over the edge. You were desperate for your own.

Leigh lifted your legs to put them over her shoulders.

“Shit...”

Leigh sniffed while peppering kisses higher and higher along your thighs, leaving hot and wet trails from your knees to your core.

“You like talking huh? Keep talking Y/N or I’ll stop right away.” Your heart pounded rigorously in the chest. You loved how aggressive Leigh could be in bed and you were more than happy to follow what she had told you.

“Please Leigh...fuck me.”

You knew the effect of these words on Leigh from the night in Palm Springs. She paused for a brief moment before breathing on your dripping core. “Good girl. Keep going.”

That was when she glided her tongue over your clit.

You could not help yourself but moan her name out loud. Leigh chuckled and used two fingers to spread your folds open before giving a long stroke at it.

“You taste so good,” Leigh hummed in amusement and buried her tongue inside you, hitting the spot that she knew would drive you crazy.

You had to hold onto something so you ran your fingers into Leigh’s locks. “Oh my god...Leigh I-I...” You tried to chase your high by pushing yourself closer to her mouth but Leigh grabbed hold of your thighs firmly to resist it.

You actually groaned when Leigh pulled away from you. You were so close. “Wh-what are you doing?”

“Are you ready for more?” Leigh raised her head and smirked at you, and your breath hitched as you saw her chin glittering in your arousal.

“Come here,” you beckoned Leigh over with your finger. Leigh tilted her head, looking at you doubtfully, but still rose herself up. You met her halfway to kiss her rapturously. You moaned when you tasted yourself in her mouth and both of you were smiling against each other.

“As much as I want to kiss you...I want my mouth over somewhere else first if you would excuse me.” Leigh pulled back and licked her lips before going back to her previous task of making you undone.

Her lips started lapping against your clit when she thrusted two fingers into you at a maddening pace. You could only hear your desperate moan and the slippery sound of her fingers pumping into you.

Your eyes rolled a little and your head fell back when you hit the climax. Leigh was still swirling at your clit when you tried to catch your breath. “God Leigh...N-no, I’m gonna-” you hissed when she flattened her tongue, stroking your core relentlessly.

“Yes babe, gimme one more.”

Tag: @madamevirgo @xxxtwilightaxelxxx

#sorry for your loss #sorry for your loss imagine #leigh shaw #leigh shaw imagine #leigh shaw smut #leigh shaw x you #leigh shaw x reader #elizabeth olsen #elizabeth olsen imagine #elizabeth olsen smut #elizabeth olsen x you #elizabeth olsen x reader

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spenciegoob · 3 years

Text

A Short Film

A/N: hey hey hey... mid writing this I realized how much I jumped the gun and thought this was a good concept, but now that I’m thinking too hard about it, maybe it’s not. I also wrote too much of it to back down now, so hopefully someone out there enjoys this as much as I did in my head lol.

Summary: Spencer steps way out of his comfort zone to ask his film major girlfriend a question.

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

Category: Fluff

Content Warnings: nothing really... Spencer hardcore struggling with technology

Word Count: 3.5k

Masterlist

___

“Hey Garcia, do you think you could help with something?” Spencer asked, rubbing the back of his neck nervously and not looking up from the floor of her office.

“Of course, Boy Wonder? What can I do for you?” Garcia answered while excitedly turning her chair back to her wall of screens.

Spencer grabbed the extra chair in her office and mumbled, “Actually um,” causing Garcia to completely abandon her position and fully face the genius.

“Spencer, are you okay? Is something wrong?” Spencer couldn’t blame her for asking. He was sweating more than usual, his face was bright red and he hadn’t stop fiddling with his hands since he shut the door.

“Oh no, nothing’s wrong. I just, uh, I don’t really know how to ask this,” Spencer stumbled back. It was the truth after all. No life experience had prepared him for such a request, one that in the grand scheme of things was not a lot, but to Spencer.

To Spencer, it was everything.

“That’s okay. Take your time,” Penelope stated back, and coming from anyone else, Spencer would have believed it was sarcastic in nature. But he also knew that Penelope was one of the only people he could never find judgement or maliciousness from.

You were the other.

“So Y/N and I as you’re probably aware have been together for 2 years now, and you also know that she just got her degree in cinematography and design, which is really funny if you think about it because I know nothing about any of that, but she knows everything. You know, sometimes she’ll explain to me what she sees through her eyes and it’s nothing like what I’ve ever been able to. I’m rambling now but I want to do that,” Spencer spurted out, and once he was done, he took a breath so deep Penelope whole-heartedly believed if he spent one more second talking, he may pass out.

“Woah there, slow down. First of all, that’s adorable. I love Y/N so much. Second of all, how exactly am I supposed to help you see things that way? Shouldn’t she be more help?” Penelope questioned, now completely confused about Spencer’s intentions with this very early morning visit.

“She can’t exactly know. It’s kind of a surprise thing,” Spencer answered shyly. He hadn’t even gotten to the punchline and yet, he was contemplating every move.

Was this a good idea?

But when he saw the way Penelope lit up before she yelled, “Tell me everything, and spare no details. None!” He knew he would stop at nothing to make this perfect.

“So here’s what I was thinking.”

That was 1 year ago today, and since then, Spencer has tried to figure out what to say when he revealed his big project. He stood in front of the mirror every day for 365 days trying to find the perfect way to put it. Still when you sat on your shared couch gazing up at him in amusement, confusion and adoration all at once, his mouth was dry and his throat clamped up.

“Spence, you’re starting to scare me. Are you okay?” You asked, watching as your boyfriend stared at you like a deer caught in headlights with a laptop and assorted cords in his hands.

“Uh, yes! Yes I am okay. I just need to um, this needs to go. You know what? I wasn’t told how to do this part, can you help me?” Spencer paced back and forth between you and the TV four times while he was talking before he stopped defeated in front of you. He wouldn’t have asked for help unless he was certain Penelope was smart enough to insert a black screen in the beginning of what caused the laptop to burn a hole in his hand.

“Yes, of course,” you said, slightly chuckling at his confusion. Spencer Reid and technology, whilst tragic, was also very adorable. “What are you trying to do?”

“I need the video on the laptop to play on the TV,” he stated simply. At least he knew what he wanted. That was a new, first step in the right direction.

“Okay easy. Just hand me that cord, and,” you drew out the ‘and’ as you bent around the TV and plugged in the cord. “Perfect. Now just plug this end into the laptop and hit play.” You handed Spencer back his end of the cord, watching as he examined the object and the side of the computer to know where exactly to put it. It almost felt like watching a toddler try and find the rightly shaped hole for the triangle piece, and you’d be lying if you said it wasn’t endearing.

Before he could break anything, you stepped in. “I know you’d be able to figure it out, but it’s that one.”

“Thank you,” he mumbled back sheepishly.

“Okay so a little back story. A year ago today, I asked Penelope to teach me how to record videos on my new phone. Thank you for that by the way, the camera on it is really cool, and I’m not just saying that because it’s one of the only things I know how to work. Anyways, I started secretly recording videos of you, of us, anything that reminded me of you, and me talking about you. So I sent them over to Garcia and she pushed them all together, and I think what I’m trying to say is I made a short film? Home video? It doesn’t really matter, but I’m showing it to you now.” Spencer didn’t acknowledge the shocked look on your face as he settled next to you and put the laptop on the coffee table.

But as you watched him find the video and set up, your jaw stayed slack. Spencer Reid, the world’s biggest technophobe, figured out how to use an iPhone camera just for you. While to others it may not seem like a lot, to you.

To you, it was everything.

“Spence, I don’t even know what to say. This is the sweetest thing anyone’s ever done for me.” It didn’t feel like enough. The amount of awe, and love that filled your chest was so comforting, so warm.

It felt like home. It felt like Spencer.

“You don’t have to say anything, just watch,” he stated before hitting the spacebar, something he’s seen you do plenty of times.

The video started out with Spencer crouching down slightly to where the phone was set up against a bookcase in front of the couch.

“Is it recording?” He whispered, and when he realized it was, he took a step back and gave a thumbs up before rushing to sit on the couch. You couldn’t help but let a full smile stretch across your face, an involuntary act when it came to Spencer.

“Hey, love bug. It’s Spencer, but wait you knew that because you can see me.” There was a small pause as Spencer squinted to see if you could actually see him from his position on the couch. When he realized he was in frame, he continued. “This is totally weird that I’m technically talking to myself right now, but I hope future me gave you an explanation. I tried to wait for a good time to start recording this, and in the two weeks I’ve known how to work that thing,” Spencer said as he pointed to the camera. “We’ve been on a case. I came home tonight, and you’re sleeping right now, but if I stay quiet enough I can say what I need to.”

You looked over at Spencer as he was twiddling with his fingers. Something he only did when he was nervous. You reached over and grabbed one of his hands, giving it a reassuring squeeze, but when you tried to pull away so as to not truly disturb his fidgeting, he caught it. So, you intertwined your fingers together, and continued to watch past Spencer.

“I came home today, and all I wanted to do was hold you. Granted, that’s every day, but today was just, it was really hard. When I came home you were asleep on the couch. One time you told me you didn't like to sleep in our bed while I was away, something about it being too big. At first, I was mad because your poor back, but today I changed my mind because the amount of steps to get to you was much less.”

Spencer unlocked the door to the apartment, resting his head against the wood as he inserted the key into the lock. The most recent case had ended with the death of both the latest victim and the unsub, and he couldn’t bear another second of remembering the scene play out in front of him.

All he wanted to do was lay in her arms, but when he opened the door, the apartment was completely silent.

And then he saw a little fuzzy sock clad foot sticking out from underneath the huge, fluffy blanket on the couch. Slowly, he walked towards you, finding you fast asleep with a t-shirt of his tightly snuggled up to your neck and face.

Spencer got down on a knee in front of you, and brushed the hair that had fallen over your eyes. Slowly, they fluttered open at his feather touch, only to widen with realization.

“You’re home!” You squealed, throwing your hands around his neck. Immediately, he reciprocated the hug, tighter than usual. Spencer tucked his head into your neck and inhaled the scent of your shampoo, a grounding technique he would never tell you he developed. The hands he delicately placed at first across the expanse of your back grew heavier, drawing your body closer to his.

You pulled your head back, him following your movements, and stared deeply into his eyes for a second. The moment you two locked eyes, he knew the jig was up. Spencer knew you could see right through him, and he knew that even if you weren’t there to witness what he had, you saw it replaying over and over in his eyes.

“You must be tired, let’s get you to bed.” Your words shocked him at first. Usually, the people in his life would ask insistent questions on his mental well-being, and while they were greatly appreciated, Spencer was never one to open up when asked to.

You, however, didn’t meddle, you didn’t push. You simply gave him a place to feel safe as you two settled under the duvet together, never letting go of one another even for a second. You held the back of his head, slowly brushing your fingers through his curls as he laid against your chest. Your fingers were medicinal to him, softly taking away the pain and violence of the day, and replacing it with security, comfort, love.

“No one’s ever been that excited to see me before, let alone knew how to take care of me the way you did. I just,” Spencer trailed off and looked towards our bedroom, where you stirred in your sleep looking for him. “You’re about to wake up and wonder where I went. Now you know what I was doing in “the bathroom” for 30 minutes actually meant. Alright, see you next video, love bug.”

The screen cut to Spencer obviously holding the phone close to his chest, the only thing in frame the space where his shoulder and neck met. The soft chords of the start of Vienna by Billy Joel can be heard from outside the room he was in.

“Okay, I’m gonna have to sneak up on you. I’m sorry in advance.”

Spencer finally addressed the camera. As the Spencer on the TV quietly left his position in what you could only assume was your bedroom, you looked over at your very real Spencer softly smiling at the TV.

When he caught your stare, he said “Watch, this is my favorite part.” Turning back to the TV, you watched as Spencer carefully tiptoed to the living room, placing the camera to lean against the vase in the middle of the dinner table to face the kitchen.

In the kitchen, you watched yourself very poorly sing along with Billy Joel using a whisk that you just got done washing as a microphone. The blush that crept up your neck and to your cheeks with embarrassment still felt the same as it did that day.

You hadn’t heard Spencer sneak up on you, not until he was right behind you and let out a soft chuckle at a note you missed. Spencer had never seen someone jump out of their skin as much as you did when he made his presence known.

“Jesus Spencer, you scared me!” You yelled before a smile crept up your face. You couldn’t help it, even in the most embarrassing times, not when Spencer looked at you like that.

“Sorry, love bug. Although, I didn’t mean for you to stop the show.” At that you hit his chest with the whisk/microphone, both of you laughing fully now. “Come here.”

Spencer took your hand, pulling you softly to his chest where you laid your head to his heart. Wrapping his hand around your waist, the two of you started to slowly sway to the music. You both were incredibly offbeat to Vienna, but listening to Spencer’s heart, you realized that the tempo you were dancing at matched up. Unbeknownst to you, due to the adrenaline of being scared, Spencer could feel your heartbeat on his abdomen, and was swaying to that.

You didn’t know how long you stayed like that, dancing to the in sync beat of each other’s hearts.

The clip of you dancing however only lasted 10 more seconds as the next scene of Spencer bundled up for the fall played. You had met Spencer during the fall, and fell in love with the way the red, yellow and orange leaves contrasted against his honey eyes. This clip was no different.

“Hey, love bug. I’m on my way to deliver this coffee to you in between classes, but I had to stop so I can show you my new friends I’ve made along the way.”

The camera panned down to 4 little ducklings surrounding Spencer’s converse, most of them just waddling around, but one was insistently pecking at the rubber toe of his left shoe. Spencer pointed at the little deviant and said ‘that’s you’ before bringing the camera back up to his face.

“I may have made the mistake of feeding them the fruit I was bringing you, which reminds me I should probably go get you more. I don’t think you’ll be mad though. How could you? Look how cute they are! I kind of want to take them home, but I definitely know that’ll make you mad. Anyways, I just wanted to show off that you’re not always the animal person in this relationship. See you soon, love bug.”

“Oh my god, Spencer. That was the cutest thing I’ve ever seen, but to confirm your thoughts, yes, I would’ve been mad,” you stated, the giddy smile never leaving your face, and giggles spreading themselves through your words.

“I know, I know. They belong in the wild,” he said back, holding up his free hand in faux defeat.

A new scene presented itself to you, this one being Spencer setting up the camera on the bathroom sink while brushing his teeth. You knew you were approaching by the music slowly getting louder.

You entered you and Spencer’s shared bathroom, Don’t Go Breaking My Heart by Elton John playing out of your phone. He was brushing his teeth, and you followed suit, not stopping the small dancing as you did.

You looked at Spencer, and started moving side to side, your free hand grabbing the crook of his elbow to join you. Looking in the mirror expectedly, you watched Spencer look up at the ceiling before joining you, a smile on his face.

Slowly, the two of you fell into a rhythm to the beat of Elton John, making funny faces to each other in the mirror as you did so.

You reached out fully to lean your head on Spencer’s shoulder as you watched.

The scene on the TV shifted once again to show a very flustered you standing in front of the TV with Citizen Kane paused. Your hair was in a messy bun, and you were sporting one of Spencer’s old Caltech t-shirts, and fuzzy black pants with little pumpkins printed everywhere.

Spencer was also wearing the same fuzzy pants.

“Spence, I’m gonna sound crazy here,” you sprinting off the couch after pausing the film you were currently trying to study for your film analysis class.

“You’re not off to a great start here,” Spencer laughed out. Spencer once told you that no matter what he thought about a book or film, he wanted to listen to you ramble about it for hours. The first thing he fell in love with about you was the way you challenged his thinking, expanding his mind to the possibilities of learning about the difference between production design and cinematography. You taught him something that no class, book or person could ever.

Your mouth dropped open, an over exaggerated gasp leaving your lips, your hand meeting your chest softly.

“Meanie.” Spencer and you chuckled at the antics, and when the laughs died down, you continued. “Here me out, though.”

And from there, you went into a deep dive about the unreliable narrator, and how it affects camera placement in the scene you two just watched.

“Oh my god. I talk that fast?” You asked Spencer, who just let a breathy laugh out at your realization.

“Don’t worry, I think it’s adorable,” he whispered the last part, the smile on his face turning from one of hilarity to one full of love.

30 seconds into your rant, you realize the phone he was attempting to hide close to his lap. Your eyes flicked between the camera that was pointed at you, and Spencer, who’s face filled with confusion as to why you stopped talking.

“Are you recording me?” You asked, a smile never leaving your face. Oh no, he’d been caught. Spencer has to think of a believable excuse, and quick.

“Uh, yeah, sorry, I just uh... I figured instead of you trying to write it down later, you’d want all your notes now.” Perfect!

“Damn, that was good,” you said, nodding softly at his swiftness. You couldn’t be mad he lied, how could you when the truth was this beautiful?

“I know, right? I came up with it on the spot,” Spencer joked with you. As if TV Spencer knew he was interrupting a moment, a throat clearing came from the video. The Spencer you saw was from 3 days ago, and was sitting in his car in what looked to be the Quantico parking garage.

“Hi, love bug. I’m days away from showing you this, and I still don’t know what to say. I hope the me you’re with now has figured it out. So, uh, yeah. That’s it. Uh, take it away, future Spencer. Actually, you’d be present Spenc-” The video cut off, courtesy of Penelope Garcia.

“Y/N,” Spencer started, turning to face a very emotional you fully. “I still haven’t found the right words. None of them could express my love for you, and perfect doesn’t come close to describing you. I know you have a thing for supporting evidence, and I think I just provided a lot to prove that the best thing to ever happen in my life is you.” You let out a small giggle, the tears welling in your eyes breaking free. “Oh no, if you cry, then I’m going to.”

You let out a full laugh now as Spencer wiped the tears falling down your cheeks before continuing.

“Before you, I was reckless. I didn’t care what happened as long as I did something to help. Now, I have a reason to be careful, a reason to care. I can’t do that to you, and if I’m going to spend the rest of my life with you, I need to live.”

You inhaled softly as Spencer reached into the pocket of his pants, taking your hand in his.

“Which brings me to my question,” he said with a small smile and cocked his head. Slowly, he dropped down to one knee in front of you.

“Y/N Y/L/N, will you marry me?” Spencer opened the velvet box to reveal a simple silver band with a square cut diamond delicately placed on top.

“Spencer Reid, yes. I will marry you.”

With shaky fingers, he slid the ring on your fingers, the fit perfect. You couldn’t wait any longer, and grabbed his face in your hands to pull his lips to yours. Your lips molded together in perfect harmony, lulling you deeper into Spencer’s embrace.

“I love you,” you whispered against his lips.

“I love you, too,” Spencer answered, only pulling back far enough to mumble before kissing you again.

Note to self: thank Penelope Garcia.

____

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432 notes · View notes

un2-verse · 3 years

Text

BILLY — Kim Taehyung (3)

Synopsis: News of a Sadistic Serial Killer nicknamed “Jigsaw” is spreading around town like wildfire… the nickname stemming from the puzzle piece he cuts from every victim’s body. No one knows who he’ll trap next but in a town full of delinquents and criminals, it could never be you. Right?

Pairing: yandere!Taehyung x f!reader

genre: angst, horror, weirdly some fluff lol

Warnings: dark themes, yandere, stalking, manipulation, conditioning, mentions of abuse, suicidal ideations/attempts, self harm, murder, depictions of torture etc (basically its gorey and fucked up), angel trap, etc stabbing and guns. do not read if triggered!!!!

wordcount: 2.2k

taglist: @yes-sol-not-soul @yoongiofmine

a/n: pt 3 is here!! honestly i wasnt expecting this amount of support as i’ve never published my writing before so thank u sm ♡ i was inspired to write this one night and i had no idea where it’d go or anything but i’m happy with the way its turning out :D fun fact abt me, i’ve been obsessed w the franchise since i was little and i actually have 2 saw tattoos, one of billy and one above saying “cherish your life” since that’s pretty much the motto of saw :) and i have quite the collection of saw/billy items so why not turn my fav horror film into a fucked up love story! let me know if u would like to be added to the taglist and pls enjoy reading^^ feel free to send me asks abt the series or anything u want~ i love hearing from u guys!! :D ps— taehyung and the reader dont have much interaction in this part,, theyll definitely be more of them together in part 4 :) unedited so pls excuse any mistakes!! tysm <33 and remember these are fictional characters and do not represent bts personally in any way!!

series masterlist

part one part two

The headlines constantly named the Jigsaw Killer, Billy. The somewhat eerie little doll that had a face as white as a Calla Lily with spirals on it’s cheeks as red as the blood that was shed during the tests. Billy was always dressed in a little black suit with a red bowtie and he was (most of the time) situated on a squeaky battered tricycle. Attached was always a tape that read “play me” and when the subjects did, a chilling voice— one that could make even the world's worst predators shiver with terror— would echo around the room.

Everyone knew that a doll clearly wasn’t responsible, yet they gave it the name Billy in hopes to somewhat humanise the face that instilled panic— they did not want to live in fear.

It was the only face behind the killings.

But this time, there was a different subject stuck in the test and Billy had made sure there was no way for them to survive.

“How are you scared of heights? You’re practically a giant yourself!”

“Just because I’m tall doesn’t mean I can’t be scared of heights Y/Nie.”

You had no idea how long had passed since Taehyung had turned up at the garage, you were too busy chatting away squeezed into the kitchen while your Dad, Yoongi and Hobi worked on the cars in the shop. If anyone could hear you both, they would think you’d known eachother since childhood— the playful jokes and light touches exaggerated that.

You’d only known him for a few hours really, if you added the time spent with him on the first day and now. It hadn’t seemed like all those weeks ago that you first met, he had a familiar presence, as though you had known him for years compared to the hours.

“I just wouldn’t imagine you to be scared of anything Taehyung… you seem so confident and fearless.”

You saw the way Taehyung looked at you. His eyes flashed with understanding.

“I did have my fears back then, much like yours.”

“What do you mean?” you had a rough idea on what he meant but you needed him to voice it.

A deep inhale and the words flowed from his lips before he could stop it, “The fear of living. I had been through some stuff you know, growing up. My mum was working a lot and my dad was an alcoholic, he was so fucking possessive and wouldn’t let her go anywhere without kicking off. It was a fucking shitshow and so toxic. This one time though, I’d pretended that I’d gone to school and waited outside the front door. It didn’t take long before I heard shit getting smashed and my dad shouting.” Taehyung was telling the truth only, he left out the part where he was also as possessive, if not more, than his father. Well, let's say… obsessive. “I just ran in the house and saw my dad towering over my mum and I don’t remember what happened but, I do remember my mum crying and my dad disappeared.”

Now Taehyung was lying through his teeth. He remembered clearly, almost like it was yesterday. He smashed the nearest bottle, pulled his mother away from the monster that scared her and stabbed him. Not just once, not twice but thirty-seven times. Hence the thirty seven tattoo on the palm of his right hand (the one he’d actually killed his father with). There was only Taehyung who knew what it meant, he counted every single time the broken glass pierced his father’s body, he counted with a smile on his face and a chuckle in his throat.

You were at a loss for words. Your mouth gaped in shock, eyes wide and your brain scrambled for the right thing to say. You reached over and grabbed his hand, interlacing your fingers. His thumb running back and forth along your hand. “I’m sorry, I can’t imagine what that must’ve been like.” There was no way you could relate, your mother and father were happy and in love. They had the ideal relationship, one you wished for yourself. You could empathise though.

“You don’t need to be sorry baby, it’s in the past and I’ve moved on from it. I was like you though, poisoned by the roots that keep you on the ground even though you wanted nothing more than to break free and be no longer.” A silence fell over you both before Taehyung uttered, “I wasn’t successful with my attempt so now I’m here to help you.”

Warmth spread throughout your body, a smile graced your features as you no longer felt alone.

You had a completely different idea to what those words actually meant.

It was nearing the evening when Taehyung’s car had been fixed. Yoongi popped his head in the kitchen to tell him but stopped himself so as to not interrupt the scene before him. You were laughing along to whatever Taehyung was babbling about with your hand resting on his bicep, with that look in your eyes that he hadn’t seen for years. Yoongi felt himself smile as he saw you hanging onto Taehyung's every word.

For the first time in forever, you looked alive.

Yoongi cleared his throat which drew yours and Taehyung’s attention, “Sorry to interrupt guys. We’ve finished with your car so whenever you’re ready we’ll be outside.” The infamous gummy smile overtook his features, you felt yourself beam in return.

“Thanks man! I’ll be like, five minutes.”

Yoongi nodded his head in reply and swiftly left the room.

You’d taken Tae’s hand into yours, playing with the array of rings that occupied his fingers. Solemn thoughts overtook, am I not gonna see him again? Was this, whatever this is, over before it had even begun? Your eyes stayed on his hand as you turned it over and traced your finger over the inked ‘thirty seven’ on his palm. “What does this mean?”

Taehyung didn’t think twice before he practically beamed out, “It’s my lucky number.”

The difference was, it wasn’t really his lucky number… although he did see it that way. It was the number that had stayed with him. It was something he was proud of, whenever he looked at the hand that killed his father, his chest filled with pride and a joyous feeling overtook his senses. It was his first murder. Something he relished in and thus, created the onslaught of Jigsaw killings. He targeted a certain type— those whose sins would lock them up forever if they were ever found out. Racists, murderers, rapists, drug dealers, con-men. Authoritative figures who abused their power. He even went as far as subjecting suicidal people.

You see, things aren’t sequential. Good doesn’t lead to good, nor bad to bad. People who steal, don’t get caught, they live the good life. Others lie, cheat and get elected.

Some people would call it karma but Taehyung, he called it justice.

He’d started this with one thing on his mind— those that don’t appreciate life do not deserve it.

Whenever a serial killer was on the loose, the press did what they always did. They gave them a nickname. While the public had named the doll Billy. The actual killer was named ‘Jigsaw’.

This stemmed from the jigsaw piece that was cut from the victims skin, no one knew why he was doing it or what it even stood for.

It did have a meaning although unknown to the public.

The jigsaw piece that was cut from the subjects was only ever meant to be a symbol that that subject was missing something. A vital piece of the human puzzle. The survival instinct.

After all, until a person is faced with death, it’s impossible to tell whether they have what it takes to survive.

Across town an underground abandoned warehouse, was where the next subject had found themselves.

They were suspended in the air, their feet merely dangling above the ground. The putrid smell of death lingered in every crevice, the sound of rats scurrying along the concrete floor filled their ears just as they began to stir awake.

A pain in their ribs was the overwhelming factor to them finally coming around. When they groggily opened their eyes, they were paralised with fear due to the scene in front of them.

A doll sat a few feet ahead, perched upon a tricycle. Adorned with a black suit and a red bowtie. A slow red light flashed in his eyes.

Billy.

Before the subject could even register how, when or why they found themselves trapped in a test, footsteps echoed behind them. The subject called out, “Help! Please, somebody help! I shouldn’t be here!”

A tsk reached their ears, as a disembodied voice replied, “Trust me, no one can hear you. Scream all you like. You’d just be wasting your breath, you may as well cherish it before it's gone.”

With hairs stood on end, the subject stilled. “What do you want from me?”

“I don’t want anything from you.” The man's footsteps grew louder. “I’m here to serve justice, that’s all.”

The man rounded the subject, settling in their view with only his cloaked back visible while he tended to the little doll. He touched Billy delicately—like he was a little child that he loved dearly. He combed his gloved hand through the doll's black hair and eventually pulled his fingers from the tresses to pat his head gently.

“You fucking psycho! Let me go!”

He couldn’t help but laugh at that which only infuriated the subject more causing them to shake in anger, a movement they soon ceased when they realised something was penetrating their ribs.

“I’d be very careful if I was you, we wouldn’t want you hurting yourself now… would we?” The cloaked figure spun around. An angry glint to his eye.

“What the fuck, you’re fucking crazy. Let me out, this isn’t right!” The subject tried their hardest to swing their legs, to somehow kick the man who’d imprisoned them.

“I think you’ll find it is right. You’re unworthy of the body you possess.” He inched closer, “see, when someone purposely intends to harm others, they lose their right to life.”

“What the fuck are you talking about?”

The man arched a brow as he replied, “Don’t play dumb. You know exactly what I’m talking about.” He felt like it was a game of cat and mouse except, he was a tiger and his subject, was the tiniest prey to mankind. “But, let me remind you! Since you can’t get your thick fucking head to work. You’re a liar, a cheater and an abuser. That ring any bells?”

The subject's face dropped.

“Ah, I see by your expression you know exactly what I’m talking about! Glad to see we’re on the same page.” He shrugged his cloak off placing it to the side of the doll. “I want to play a game.”

“What game? This isn’t a fucking game! You’re sick in the head you fucking cunt!”

The atmosphere shifted, the man remained calm while the subject went ballistic.

“What is this? What fucking game?”

“You feel the machine that’s currently occupying your ribs? Well, in about ten minutes that’s going to rip you apart. I’m proud to say that trap is my baby. I’ve been working on it especially for you! How nice is that?” he reached out to tug at the subject’s legs, tormenting them like a cat would a mouse. “Anyway, as my beautiful angel trap will rip you apart, my darling little friend Billy over here,” the subject followed the direction the man's hand pointed, “is going to match your face with the ugliness of your soul.”

“Fuck, fuck this! How do I stop it? Tell me how I fucking stop it!”

A boxy grin overtook the man's face, laughter poured from his mouth as he leaned over and slapped the subject’s leg. “This is a special game.”

“Who are you? What do you mean by ‘special game’?”

He raised himself so he stood tall and grabbed a knife from his pocket, “I’m the man you call Jigsaw.” He traced the tip of the knife along the subject’s ankle, “and when I say a special game… I mean you can’t get out.” While the subject was screaming in realisation, Taehyung walked back for his cloak, hung it over his shoulder and stalked off back the way he came. He sent one last smile to the subject as he rounded them and within the blink of an eye, he gripped the knife and slashed the subject’s achilles.

A chilling scream pierced the eerie atmosphere, the subject couldn’t string words together. Abundances of anxiety, terror and pure panic took reign of their body. Taehyung grabbed the injured muscles and forced his gloved fingers in as he gripped and twisted them, “That’s for Y/N.”

Taehyung had pressed the timer before he cut the subject’s tendons. He grabbed the tape from his pocket and threw it on the ground and with a chuckle he shouted, “Game over!”

Before he reached the end of the hallway, he heard the gunshots pierce his subjects face followed by the sound of the angel trap, even this far away Taehyung heard every crack of the ribs and the noise of the body being tore apart.

Without looking back, Taehyung rounded the corner and slammed the door shut.

He’d chosen the Angel trap for the irony, the subject that was currently hanging from the ceiling was no angel. They were a fucked up, evil, waste of space. Taehyung had done the world a favour, he’d done you a favour.

That got him thinking, how much blood would you shed in order to stay alive?

[a/n: who do we think was in the trap???👀]

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darqx · 3 years

Text

Ask and ye shall receive [maybe]

I would just like all of you to know, i collect these asks and then answer some of them when i have a bunch hence why a lot of them are so old |D;

❗️For commonly asked qs please see my BTD FAQ

Sos all i could think was this

The wording of your first sentence made me laugh a lot XDD Rire is currently a single pringle by choice, so the most anyone could do is flirt and hope that somehow catches his interest for an extended period of time.

Rire’s tentacles aren’t self cleaning so much as they are self manifesting :D They only exist when he wants them to, so technically they are never the “same” tentacles twice.

O no XD;

So i had a lot of fun at one point figuring out how souls both looked and tasted in my BP verse, and whilst all souls just look like amorphous blobs/clouds/flame when extracted, according to my notes Rire’s should theoretically be coloured red. With maybe some gold or pearlescent flecks.

I think my exact words were we probably couldnt classify it as “love” in the definition we are used to lol. Hmm i think that if he could/did, it would pretty much be a sadistic master/pet relationship. In other words he’d be exactly the same except he’d provide some more affectionate aftercare and keep you healthy (cos he wants you to last and last and last), and would protect you from most external harm (cos he can be possessive). Bonus points if you still try and fight him every now and then cos that would keep the “relationship” spicy.

Depends on what you mean by immortal lol, like if you just mean hard to kill he might take that as a challenge. If you mean they’re like, idk a God or something then he is actually smart enough to weigh up the pros and cons of an altercation and nope out of one if he deems it to be a lost cause (for him) :d

He’s kinda too busy having fun tormenting people to really watch it/have an opinion on it.

I actually drew something like this a couple years ago, it was a bit tongue in cheek but it still stands XD They can have tea as a common denominator lol. On a side note though I don’t think Law would ever try and kidnap Rire due to how anxious Law is and how imposing Rire just looks lolol.

Analyse what they might actually want - and then probably do the opposite lol. You know, cos he’s an asshole.

It’s a medium sized city i think (i dont envision it being like a megapolis or anything lol) and there’s a whole bunch of different kinds of demons living there. It’s kinda divided into 2 areas; the main central where he and most of everyone else lives, and an outer section where trading with other Sectors can happen.

I’d rather they didn’t! :v IMO if you’re gonna sell BTD merch you should at least draw it yourself...

I had no idea what a port was in this context and so threw the question at Gato and her exact opening words were “someone made a web port???? Weird!” cos apparently that sounds near impossible considering a few things lol. Maybe you are a tech wiz tho!

Anyway (if you are talking about a web port) we agreed that whilst you could do that, we cant officially support it. This is due to the fact that since we’re not controlling the web port we wouldn’t know if there was like, any weird extras added into it or something (not saying you would do that, just that the possibility for malicious code/adverts/virus etc is there).

Long story short; if you wanted to make your port available to others to play we wouldn’t go out of our way to force you to take it down lol, but we can’t support it as an official way to play the game. So any players of a web port that’s outside of the official download areas, you do so at your own risk.

LISTEN

#boyfriend to death #rire answer dump #answer dump #art #doodle #baby btd

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corpsentry · 3 years

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january: an art retrospective

i did some stuff last month (but it’s a lot of stuff and there’s a photodump + some Serious Fucking Reflection, so it’s all below the cut)

so ok, let’s start with this. here are some heads. each head has a red arrow. that red arrow is what i call the red line of the devil. it’s the slope of the face from the side of the eye to the cheekbone and then down towards the chin. up until like 2 weeks ago, i couldn’t draw it. i couldn’t fucking draw it. i would edit over that part of the face over and over again until i was frustrated and tired and i had a raging homosexual headache and it still never looked right. notice that each head is different. notice that each head looks wrong.

at the start of 2021 i finally admitted to myself, as per the image above, that i was deeply, deeply unhappy with my art. what was the problem? i dunno. but i decided i was going to fix it and i was going to do so via another one scribble a day event wherein for every day of january i would find a photo of a human head, and i would draw it.

january 1st, 2021. i was embarrassed to tweet this even on my private account where like 5 friends and a rock would see it. in retrospect, you can also see all of my bad habits emerging like dicks from a hole in the ground. it’s disproportionate. the brows look flat. the eyes are slanting upwards. the entire drawing looks flat, like this isn’t a 3d person but a caricature of one.

january 2nd, 3rd, 4th:

on the 2nd i decided to start a separate thread for doodles and applied learning. here’s the first set of tests

the rest of the week is kind of uneventful so we’re going to skip those. fast forward to january 11th

this one is especially bad. i am acutely aware, suddenly, that i am not changing anything at all. i’m stressed and miserable about it because i’m still trying to see people as people and trying to draw people that look attractive and proportionate and hot. my friend, leny, reminds me that i need to think about faces in terms of planes. i have a moment. my other friend masha sends me some links to anatomy tutorials. i have another moment.

january 11th. applied sketch

january 13th is when i start the troubleshooting process. the link above drives me mad because i’m pretty happy with the face but then i realize that there’s something very fucking wrong with the shape of the head LOL and then i realize that i’ve never had any idea what the proportion of the face to the rest of the skull is so i grit my teeth and i open a new canvas and i

bald studies. it seemed like the right thing to do. can’t draw heads? ok draw some heads. look at some photographs. i traced each photo but tried to stick to straight lines so that i could replicate the shapes more easily. i broke each face down into shapes. i thought about airplanes

i got really excited. i started doing studies, then applied studies, then stylized studies.

sketches. i’m not sure what’s going on (as always) and it’s very rough, but they look different from the sketches i did on january 2nd. that’s a start

january 16th’s daily study. looks more like a person now. juuuuuust a bit

more applied studies

on the 18th i take a break and go stare at some lips because i don’t understand how the fuck they work. again, i focus on shapes, on volume, on the fact that these things exist in 3d. holy fuck lips exist in 3d. holy fuck we are real

january 19th. i’m working on it.

january 22nd. some sketches + a daily study. it has finally occurred to me that heads can tilt up and down and that things look different accordingly. yes i was not aware of this before. yes i have been drawing for over a decade.

january 23rd. by this point after doing my daily sketch i almost always go back and do an applied study which is basically to say i drew a lot of fucking links. this one looks kind of okay. i’m kind of proud

january 25th. links. trying to make sense of everything i’ve learned

26th, 27th, 28th. daily studies

january 1st. january 31st

The End Of The Photo Dump (dab)

ok NOW i get to talk about what i discovered while studying the shit out of human beings

FIRST OF ALL, there is something precious and magical about drawing shit without the explicit knowledge that you’re going to tweet that shit out to 45 people later. it takes the burden of perception off your shoulders and that does something to you, or at least that’s my theory. i told myself i wouldn’t post any of this stuff until the end of the month (if i wanted to post it at all) and kept everything off my public social media accounts and that meant i could draw ugly as hell without worrying about who would point and laugh, which i absolutely fucking did. a lot of these are fucking trainwrecks. most of these are fucking trainwrecks. why do they look like that?? why??? this doesn’t look like the work of someone who’s allegedly been drawing since they were in kindergarten, does it?????

here’s why: because that person took a huge motherfucking swing at everything they’d ever known about art and spent a month building something new in its place. the abstract explanation is that i grew up on shoujo and weird old anime and my understanding of anatomy was unironically kamichama karin and while i love kamichama karin, when kamichama karin is your rule even if you try to break it, you’re going to end up going nowhere. “you have to know the rules to break them”, yeah? well i didn’t know shit. the abstract explanation is i’ve been miserable about my art for a few years now because i saw other people doing things effortlessly which i couldn’t and instead of going back to the basics, i tried to do what they did (not plagiarism, mind you, i mean i literally tried to copy the red line of the devil i mentioned above because i couldn’t even make that happen) and then i fucking failed.

the simple explanation is this. i had to unlearn everything, and relearn it again (like some kind of new renaissance clown, what the fuck is this?)

take this for example. all my life i’ve drawn faces in the order: eyes, nose, mouth, face shape, head. this works for some people, im aware, but it was something central to how i had always drawn, so i decentralized it. i said fuck you to the old me and changed the order up. now i start with the nose, then the eyes, mouth, the chin line, and the sides of the face. now i force myself to think about the human head as a series of parts interacting with each other instead of a bunch of disparate features which i want to look pretty.

or let’s use this zelda from last year. something about this looked wrong last october, the way something about all of my drawings looked wrong, but i couldn’t pinpoint it for hell the way i couldn’t articulate Any of my feelings about the visual arts. now, looking back, here’s what i see. that nose is sticking out far too much given how she’s not really facing very far away from the camera. that ear at the back shouldn’t be there. her forehead is too big. she doesn’t have a forehead. what the fuck is up with the shape of her head?

so apparently reject modernity embrace tradition has its roots in alt-right terminology and i’m not very horny for the alt-right (you understand), but the spirit survives here. you know sometimes you have to admit that you have no idea what the fuck you’re doing and draw people for 31 days. i’ve spent my whole life drawing stylized people and while again there are artists who have no issue with this, i veered off the track of the Good and the Holy and couldn’t get back on. i had no point of reference because i’d never thought about what an actual human being looks like, so i had no way to fix what i knew in my gut looked wrong but wouldn’t come out better.

this was hard. this was like oikawa tooru swallowing his worthless pride and admitting that ushijima wakatoshi had gotten the best of him for the last time in his high school career, but in haikyuu!! by furudate haruichi oikawa tooru fucks off to argentina and then joins the argentinean national team, and you know what, i think i’ve made it to argentina (not the team just the country). as per the golden rule of dont fucking move until you’re at least two thirds of the way through the month, i only started trying to draw Shit shit on like the 22nd or something, but i was happy with that i created. i am happy with what i’ve done. i’ve posted like 2 things this month that involve people with what i now call ~applied Knowledge~~ and they’re, like, not perfect obviously (perfection is an unattainable ideal), but i’m fucking proud of them. i didn’t spend 5 hours hunched over my laptop adjusting the red line of the devil because it’s not a devil’s line anymore. because i finally sorta get how people work. because i sat down and i said ‘we are not going to fuck with this misery shit anymore’ and then i did that. it’s just a line now.

here are 2 collages tracking my painstakingly carved out progress from january 2nd to february 2nd because i’m a slut for collages

and here’s what i’ve done to my art! the same person drew these but also Not Really! you know! for the first time in a year i don’t immediately hate what i’ve drawn. you know what guys? art is fucking fun. zelda’s forehead doesn’t scare me anymore because i know how foreheads fucking work now, and i don’t know everything, and i’m going to keep troubleshooting stuff as i go (i want to draw a skeleton. like a. i want to draw a goddamn skeleton guys) but i’m honestly and genuinely proud of what i’ve done in the span of a month, and i’m also in disbelief. i started this month-long challenge out as a last ditch effort to make peace with my art because i’ve been tired for a long time and i was ready to kick the bucket on drawing people altogether. i didn’t think anything would happen. nothing’s happened for years. i’ve been miserable for years.

this was the caption for january 1st, 2021. i was super, super fucking embarrassed and it looks like super fucking shit, but you know what, i think i did in fact triumph over the bullshit. surprisingly enough, when you put in consistent effort into something, You Will See Results. didn’t see that coming, did you? i know i didn’t.

this isn’t a success story. it’s a happiness story. i never gave a shit damn about the institute of art or whatever, i was just mad at myself because what i saw in my head didn’t match up with what was on the canvas. and now it’s getting better. now i’m calibrating the compass. now drawing not just backgrounds but also people is exciting to me, and i can stick my links in your face and tell you ‘they hot’. i’m going to keep doing that. i’m going to keep going until i drop off the side of the earth and then spiral towards mars like some kind of fairy, and then i’m going to create something beautiful.

thanks for reading. here’s a pr department link for sticking around until the end

#my stuff

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