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badolmen · 5 months

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WARNING 18+

19

#ra speaks #it’s a silly joke/pun dw #we stay silly :3 #edit:#woahg. that’s a lot of notes. hi everybody o/#10k. stop clenching your jaw and drink some water.#15k. eat some fresh fruit this week! I’m having kiwis tonight :]#20k. quit sitting like a shrimp it’s bad for your neck! sit up straight and do a little stretch every now and then #25k. I’m up at 2 AM but I’ll get to see the sunrise today :] if you can’t see that I hope you admire the sunset later today #30k. do something fun you haven’t done in a while. I haven’t drawn in months - I think I’ll paint a cat tomorrow :3 #40k. I just slept 9 hours straight for the first time in weeks :] remember to ask for help when you need it! no glory in senseless suffering

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snarkspawn · 5 months

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the devil you know

#baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #bg3 fanart #bg3 raphael #stuff and things #userpharawee #yeah I know everyone and their mum has already done something like this #with the shadow and the exact caption and all lmao I *know* ok #I just. wanted to do it too #and I've had it in my head for months it needed to get out #anyway. moving on!

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giantkillerjack · 1 year

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Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need.#the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist.#the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28!#a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents.#they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong.#and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives.#you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead?#or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of.#no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow.#i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong.#just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

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starwarjotta · 4 months

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looking for someone on Tatooine

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wasyago · 4 months

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a random cleo in armor

#wanted to draw here but didn't have any ideas. when in doubt draw armor☝️#cleo is fun to draw i like her color scheme. but i still need to get better at drawing different body types #this one isn't bad but i feel like i could've done better. need to practice more #hermitcraft #zombiecleo #my art #sketch #also im rushing to post all the backlogged hc art before season 10 starts so there will be 2(+) post per day until then #it's not necessary but i feel like otherwise it'll just drown in the new stuff

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upon-the-snow · 4 months

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early mornings after nightmares

#just realized I made a pinned post with this art before putting it up whyyy am I like this #anyway headcanon time: I like to think they hang out while the sun comes up after the doctor has a nightmare and they just sit and talk #or Donna will read and just keep him company (I love watching the sun rise it’s such a unique feeling! i suck at getting up early tho lol)#Doctor who #fourteenth doctor #donna noble #I need like. A platonic ship name do we have one of those for them?#my art #not super happy with it but ITS DONE #doctor who fanart #the doctor #catherine tate #david tennant #procreate #Digital art #uh #incase my handwriting is as illegible as I think : Donna’s says “worlds best mum” and the Doctor’s says “worlds okayest uncle”#okay this looks more like a sunset so??

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nipuni · 6 months

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The heart of the universe 💫

A speedpaint video of this will be available at my Patreon on december 1st!

#doctor who #dr who #DW #tenth doctor #david tennant #my art #okay maybe on december 2nd at this rate because I just came back home from a trip a few hours ago and I have a ton of work to get done stil #I also went straight to the doctor (the actual one) because of the swollen face and turns out they don't know what it is and I need a MRI #great wonderful fantastic I'm not scared at all I'm so brave about it.. anyway here is my comfort little man

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tricoufamily · 3 months

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sinclair hair

i didn't mean to say ombre. streak acc. whatever

base game compatible

masculine

hat compatible

all lods

all ea swatches for hair

all ea swatches for acc + bright white swatch (preview)

hairline used in previews

download (sfs)

#i've tried to make him as a sim 32342 times and i need to do it again. i just can't get him to look how he does in my head #but yeah i've had this guy since i was 15. he's got a long story we're not getting into it #i got this done really fast huh #ts4 #ts4cc #ts4mm #the sims 4

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nerdpoe · 7 months

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Danny was a stillborn, and Maddie made a deal with a Devil to give her baby a soul so he could live.

But the Devil couldn't really like, make a wholeass new soul for this. He could grab one of the ones he owned, but that'd just be putting an adult in an infants body, and that whole thought kind of weirded the Devil out.

So, he compromised.

He had a piece of the Laughing Magicians soul, and he just kinda.

Shoved that into the baby corpse.

And holy shit it worked, the kid took it.

Which, awesome! He gets the lady's soul and the kids when it's matured!

Except that was fifteen years ago, and now said Devil is desperately trying to get into contact with Constantine to cancel the deal they signed and agreed to.

Cuz that little baby?

Yeah he's the High King of the fucking Infinite Realms; a being that can not only cancel said contract, but do it and declare the Devil who made it guilty of Treason.

So he needs to find the Laughing Magician fucking yesterday, before the kid looks too closely at why his soul is so weird and figures it out.

#dpxdc #dcxdp #dp x dc #dc x dp #phanfic #story prompt #when danny does find out that said devil has a contraact on his mom #he pays the dude a visit #tbh he's bein real nice about #literally just dropped in to ask what needs to be done to nullify the contract #but this devil is SHITTING HIMSELF the entire time #oh yeah #baby corpse tw #death of a child #he gets better tho #wait shouldn't all danny phantom posts have “death of a child” in the tags #cuz i mean #if we're getting technical

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obsob · 1 year

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despite, despite, despite!!

#mine #original #fun fact when i first started colouring this i like couldnt remember what th trans flag looked like #i just like. did it then was like . hmm. that is the flag of slovakia i think #anyway #i missed tdov by a mile but. hello #i missed th day bc i was at my bfs house. thats t4t love baby #i hope u hve all had a good easter!!#thank u to everyone who inquired abt commissions i am surprised abt th amount of interest!!#when this batch is done i will open more. will probably b a regular thing :3 #i will now do exercise and have a bath i thinky #i need to make myself read this book...im so not use to horror anytime i read anything remotely unsettling im like oohoohohohmmhhmm n #dont read for like. 4 days #ive read like 200 pages in 10 days KSFBSBJ get a GRIP #anyway. good evening

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crankycorvid · 10 months

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thunder lizard

#raikou #raging bolt #pokemon #pkmnart #dinosaur #just a rough sketch thing but i needed to get something done #fingers crossed for a triceratops entei cuz i think that would Rule #was looking at rebecca dart art's work for inspiration cuz their sauropod paintings are always well shot

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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 4 months

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Laios's three Boy Best Friends. And yes, they hate him.

#dungeon meshi #laios touden #toshiro nakamoto #chilchuck tims #kabru #BF in this context could be boyfriend or best friend. The line is so blurry.#Chilchuck less so but whatever is going on between Shuro and Laios & Kabru and Laios is giving strong:#“dude if you were a girl I'd date the hell out of you”. And from the genderswap extra's that sentiment is canon for BOTH.#This was made prior to the translation of the Laios & Kabru & Shuro restaurant date comic and honestly I am just feeling vindicated.#I don't even know what to call this dynamic other than a situationship. There is so much going on between all of them.#Even on a purely platonic reading - the miscommunication and male yearning for friendship hurt so bad.#When we got the Big Hug scene in the epilogue arc I was whooping and hollering! Pure catharsis moment!#I also don't like hugs very much so I really felt it went Shuro ('hates being touched') went in for the bear hug.#Do not get me started on the agony of 'always lying' Kabru telling the truth (I just wanted to be friends)#and 'always believes' Laios thinking it's another lie and brushing him off.#I am once again supporting dungeon meshi day by posting art. Please watch dungeon meshi.#obligatory edit because I’m tired: YES. Chilchuck cares for Laios and him admitting it was a huge part of his arc #YES he is more just fed up with him that actually hating him.#I needed a third guy to be canonically done with his ass for the THREE WEED SMOKING GIRLFRIENDS reference

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beets · 2 months

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baby, bi bi bi

#911 #911edit #evan buckley #buddie #this has been in my drafts for months bc i'm the slowest gif maker in the world and bad at finishing things (wanted to get it done before #s7 oops) but it's even more apt now ig even though i've seen like 6 other versions of it out there already. oh well here's mine #(and bonus i got to include those last two gifs so it worked out)#sorry again that the lone star one is such shit quality i literally can't find a hq version of that episode idk what to tell you #there are things missing from this but i just wanna post it before next episode and i need to go to bed i have to work tomorrow bye (bi bi)#beets.gif

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cahootings · 10 months

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Quick question. what the fuck is this

#good omens #I can’t look at this #sorry this gif is so bad I literally took a video of my screen with my phone #sometimes you just need to get the job done

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kneelingshadowsalome · 5 months

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I always write König as this crazy horny dude who comes barging in on leaves and rails you senseless the minute he sees you but in all honesty...?

I think he’s the kind of guy who drags himself over that doorstep, falls asleep on your sofa (he can’t fit there but that won’t stop him from snoring before a minute has passed), eats all the food in your fridge when he wakes up, and THEN turns his manic gaze to you.

His energy bar just got up by 35 % so now he can fuck you until your legs shake

#he's just getting his needs met #one by one #fucking is not his top priority however if he's already sleepwalking #why does he look so eepy all the time?!#what have they done to my man

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merrodi · 6 months

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#splatoon #agent 48 #agent 32 #i just remembered i have this giant project i need to get done and ive forgotten about it for days #last three images are commissions #my art #ocs

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