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joelsgreys · 2 days

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Post Outbreak! Joel Miller x Pregnant! Female Reader

snapshots masterlist

summary: When you finally start to show, Joel has a tough time with it as the reality sinks in—he’s going to be a father again.

warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, MINORS DNI. JACKSON ERA. (TW) PREGNANCY. established relationship. no mention of reader’s age, however in other works for this universe, it is implied she is younger than Joel, her specific age will never be stated so do with that what you will. brief descriptions of a pregnant woman’s changing body, brief mention of morning sickness, mention of breastfeeding (it only comes up in a conversation very briefly) these subjects can possibly be triggering, especially mentions of a changing body, so while i try to handle everything with the utmost care, i still ask that you proceed with caution. domesticity, reader enjoys taking care of her family, ellie is a little shit, grumpy joel, he’s sort of a dick at first? but only because he’s working through some feelings so let’s forgive him, okay?

word count: 3.5k

a/n: this is part of the snapshots universe, but it could absolutely be read as a standalone too. minimal editing, this has been sitting in my drafts and i did a quick edit during my lunch hour, so please excuse any mistakes.

“Shit.”

You almost can’t believe your own two eyes. Staring at your reflection in the large, oval shaped mirror hanging over the porcelain bathroom sink, your gaze widens in complete surprise. “Jesus Christ,” you mutter, turning to the side. It takes your brain about a good minute or two to process, really process, the way that your belly strains against the thin, white cotton of your camisole. It had seemingly swollen overnight—because it hadn’t been this prominent the day before, had it?

Over the last few months, there’d been changes.

Some subtle and some not so subtle.

“Ellie! Stop fucking staring at them,” you’d scolded the teenager late one evening during yours and hers weekly game night. For as hard as you tried focusing on what move you should make next, it was hard to concentrate on the chessboard in front of you when you could feel the way her eyes were fixed on your breasts. “I mean it! Quit staring at my boobs, you little shit.”

She held up her hands, her mouth full of popcorn.

“Hey, in my defense, they’re just fucking there, man. If anything, they’re fucking staring at me, okay?”

During your chess rematch the following week, you had accidentally knocked one of your pawn pieces off of the table. When you’d stood up and bent over to pick it up, she had made the observation that your butt seemed to have gotten a little bigger too.

“Bet Joel’s liking these changes,” Ellie had smirked. “It sure as hell explains why the headboard’s been banging against the wall more than usual lately.”

You threw the pawn at her, smiling in satisfaction when it bounced off her forehead and landed into her glass of lemonade.

One part of your body, however, hadn’t changed.

Not until now.

“Hon, trust me, you have nothing to be worried about,” Maria had assured you with confidence when you had brought up your concerns about your stomach. “Every woman, and every pregnancy, is different. I didn’t start showing until I was around six months, remember?”

“I guess you’re right.” You’d been around four months, then. “Doesn’t help that I haven’t felt the baby move.”

“You will,” Maria had promised. “Just be patient”

Biting your lip, you place a hand on your belly.

It’s always been one of the softer parts of you, but now, it’s firmed into a perfect, round bump.

“Maybe soon I’ll feel you move,” you murmur, giving it a gentle pat. You tug the lace hem of your camisole down as far as it can go and then pull at the elastic waistband of your blue, terry cloth shorts.

Shutting off the lights in the bathroom, you slip out into the bedroom where you find that Joel’s still tangled up in the sheets, fast asleep. He had been assigned to the afternoon patrol route today—normally an early riser, if he was still snoozing, it meant that he really needed the rest. Deciding it was best to let him keep sleeping for a little while longer, you quietly tiptoe out of your shared bedroom and head downstairs into the kitchen.

After making yourself a glass of fresh squeezed orange juice, and one for the kid as well, you prepare the coffee maker for Joel. You spoon dark roast grounds into the filter and set the timer for the coffee to start brewing in thirty minutes.

He should be up by then, you think, pulling a basket of eggs out of the refrigerator.

You’re starting to get used to this. Domesticity.

Despite your protests, Maria had made the decision to pull you off patrol that same afternoon you had shared the news of your pregnancy. “I’m putting you on leave,” she’d told you. “Effective immediately. I don’t want to see you outside of these walls. Got it?”

“That’s not fair, Maria. You were out on patrol until—”

One stern glare from her had shut you right up.

“Fine.”

Sure, you missed it and looked forward to the day when you’d be able to get back into the saddle with your rifle in hand, but this way of life had grown on you. Certainly a lot more than you thought it would.

You enjoyed taking care of the house. Packing Ellie her lunch for school and checking her homework. Having a nice a meal on the table for the three of you to enjoy in the comfort of your own home instead of having to go down to the crowded mess hall for supper because you and Joel were both always much, much too tired after a long day out on patrol to bother with cooking.

With the baby due to arrive in the winter, looking after your little family had become your purpose, and you did not mind it one bit.

As strips of bacon sizzle in one pan on the gas powered stove, you crack a couple of eggs into another, knowing the kid is already on her way downstairs. You can hear the sound of her old, tattered low top sneakers that you have been trying to throw away for almost a year now squeaking on the kitchen tiles just as you finish plating her breakfast.

“Morning!” Ellie pipes, the loud plop of her backpack into a chair prompting you to turn around. “What’s for brea—whoa! Holy shit!” Her brown eyes widen in shock when she sees you and her jaw drops. “Dude.”

“Ellie,” you say her name warningly as you walk over to the table. “Don’t.”

“You’re bigger!”

With a playful glare, you set her plate down, along with her glass of orange juice. “Thanks a lot, you little jerk.” You feign offense. “You’re making your own eggs from now on.”

“Fuck, I’m sorry.” Ellie’s cheeks flush a shade of red and she squirms, sputtering apologetically, “I swear, I don’t mean it like that at all. It’s just, your stomach, it didn’t—you didn’t look like this last night, you know?”

She’s fucking lucky that your raging hormones decided to take the morning off duty.

“You look different. I mean, you look great—”

“Ellie?”

“Yeah?”

“Just shut up and eat.”

“Deal.”

She shoots you a sheepish grin and sits down, scarfing down her food in her usual manner.

“You get your fractions homework done?”

“Yeah.” Ellie huffs, rolling her eyes. “Took me forever. I was up until fucking midnight.”

Amused, you offer, “Want me to check your work?”

“Sure.”

As Ellie inhales the rest of her breakfast, you pull out a green, single subject notebook from her backpack and look over her homework for miscalculations.

“So, uh, how are you feeling?” she asks after a minute.

“I’m feeling alright. I think the morning sickness finally stopped, so can’t complain.” Shrugging, you close the notebook and stick it into her backpack. “You did good, kid. Only got two problems wrong.”

“Man, I really wish we knew whether it’s a boy or girl,” Ellie mumbles through a mouthful of scrambled eggs. “What do you want to have, anyway?”

“It doesn’t matter to me, Ellie,” you answer, honestly. Clocking the skepticism on her face, you laugh and say, “It’s true. As long as the baby’s healthy, that’s all I care about.” And you mean it. As an expectant mother in the post outbreak world where medicine is scarce, supplies are limited, and the closest thing you have to a hospital is the town’s old clinic, the only thing you can hope for is the smooth, safe delivery of a healthy child.

Before she can say anything, you both catch the sound of Joel’s heavy boots as he descends the staircase.

She quirks an eyebrow. “Uh, has Joel seen you yet?”

Grimacing, you shake your head. “No.”

“Well, I don’t wanna be here for all that awkward,” Ellie says, chugging the rest of her orange juice. She stands up and snatches up her backpack, along with her lunch bag, which you’d packed for her earlier that morning. Just as she’s about to whirl around on the heel of her sneaker and make a run for the front door, she pauses, watching as you make your way back over to the stove to light another flame. “Unless you want me to be?”

“I’ll be fine, Ellie,” you assure her. “Go on, get to school. Maybe you’ll be on time to class for once.”

“If you say so.” She wishes you luck and then bolts out of the kitchen, throwing a quick goodbye at Joel on the way out. “See ya later, old man!”

Nervously, you turn around and start cracking another two eggs into the pan. There’s no telling how he’s going to react.

Joel’s been fairly supportive since you’d found out you were pregnant, considering how unplanned it was. But you know him like the back of your own hand, and you know, despite the numerous times he’s denied it, that it has been weighing heavily on him. Each time you’d try to sit down to talk to him about it, he would brush you off and insist he was fine. But he wasn’t fine.

And you wish he would spit it out and tell you why.

In your periphery, you notice the stained glass butterfly he had hung in front of the window above the sink, the ornament catching and refracting the sunlight. Flecks of color dance across the walls in captivating patterns, brightening the space. You think of the sweet little girl he’d hung it for, the little girl he rarely talks about, that he keeps tucked away safely in his memory.

You bite back a small sigh.

By now, you’ve learned not to push him. Especially not about what he was feeling. He would tell you when he was ready.

“Who the hell lit a fire under her ass this mornin’?” Joel asks gruffly as he walks into the kitchen. “She ain’t ever this fuckin’ eager to go to school.”

“Not sure,” you reply in the most nonchalant tone you can muster as you use a spatula to scramble the eggs. Transferring them onto a plate, you add three strips of bacon, and then pour his coffee. “I have your breakfast ready, Joel. Have a seat.”

You hear a chair scrape against the tile.

“I keep tellin’ you I can make my own breakfast, darlin’.”

“And I keep telling you I don’t mind making it for you,” you quip, and you hear him grumble something under his breath.

Inhaling a deep, calming breath through your nose, you take the plate of eggs and bacon in one hand, and his cup of coffee in the other. Your fingers grasp the handle of his ceramic, owl mug in a near death grip. You exhale slowly, and then turn around to face him.

He sees your swollen middle and stiffens in his chair.

The tension is instantaneous. Palpable.

Uncomfortable.

Awkwardly, you shift from one foot to the other.

“Your belly,” Joel murmurs, a visible tick in his jaw as his gaze drags over your midsection. “S’bigger.”

“Yeah. It is. Guess I’m going to have to start trading for maternity clothes soon,” you remark, shuffling over to the table. Setting down the plate and mug of coffee in front of him, you take a seat across the table. Your eyes try desperately to meet his, but they refuse. There’s no way for you to decipher what he’s thinking. You let out a small, nervous laugh. “Can you please say something?”

He lightly clears his throat. “I’ll take you to Main Street on Saturday,” he tells you, picking up his mug. “I’ve got the day off from patrol. I’ll, uh, pick through some of my own things and see what I don’t need so we can make a trade for some clothes.” He pauses, then offers quietly, “In the meantime, you can wear my shirts. They might be more comfortable for you.”

You flash him a grateful smile. “Thank you, Joel.”

Sipping his coffee, he continues to avoid your gaze.

“Mhm,” is all he says.

Your smile falters.

It’s the middle of August.

The afternoon heat is sweltering. Unforgiving.

“Jesus, it’s a fuckin’ scorcher,” Tommy sighs, glancing over towards the lake where his mare, Maxine, is taking a drink beside his brother’s stallion, Phoenix. His raven curls are damp with sweat, plastered to his forehead. “Hotter than the devil’s fuckin’ balls out here, ain’t it?”

He’s met with silence.

Looking over his shoulder, he sees Joel leaning against a tree, his rifle in hand as he stares at the Grand Tetons in the distance almost like he’s in a trance. “Joel?”

Blinking furiously, Joel shakes his head. “Sorry, you say somethin’ to me just now?” He asks in a daze, pushing away from the lodgepole pine. “We headin’ out?”

“You’ve been actin’ real strange all afternoon,” Tommy observes, walking towards him with his own gun slung over his shoulder. “Either the heat is startin’ to get to you, or you’ve got somethin’ on your mind, big brother.”

Joel hesitates. His dark eyes flit to the other side of the lake where the other members of their afternoon patrol group are refilling their canteens with water.

“S’alright,” his younger brother says. “Don’t worry ‘bout them. Can’t hear us.”

Joel’s chest heaves with a heavy sigh. “She popped.”

“Huh?”

“Her belly finally popped. She’s showin’ now.”

Amused, Tommy lightly shakes his head. “Y’shouldn’t be so surprised, Joel. Was ‘bout time,” he remarks with a shrug. “What is she—like six months along now?”

“She’ll be six months in a couple weeks.” Joel wipes the perspiration off his brow with the back of his hand and sighs once more. “Look, I ain’t stupid, Tommy. I knew it was bound to happen sooner or later, but it still caught me by surprise. When I saw her, it became real for me. She’s got my kid in there. I’m gonna be a dad again.”

“You’re scared.” It’s not a question, it’s a statement.

“Shitless,” Joel confesses, feeling his chest tighten.

“What are you afraid of?”

Joel almost laughs.

He doesn’t know where to start.

He’s afraid of everything.

“All of it, Tommy. I’m afraid for her, havin’ to give birth with no medicine,” he tells him, his voice breaking. “I’m afraid I won’t remember what to do with a newborn or that I won’t know how to help her durin’ those first few months—”

“This ain’t your first rodeo,” Tommy reminds him. “You did it once, and you did just fine, Joel.”

“That was over three fuckin’ decades ago. And it was a different world. If Sarah—” He stops, taking a second to catch his breath. The image of his daughter’s little face flashing in his mind feels like a violent punch to the gut. Even after all this time, it still knocks all of the wind out of his lungs. “When her mom had trouble breastfeedin’ her, I could head to the grocery store and buy her baby formula. If she got a real bad fever, I could load her up in the truck and drive her to the emergency room.” He glances down at his broken watch. “Besides, I was a lot younger, then. And I wasn’t half fuckin’ deaf like I am now. When Sarah would wake up cryin’ in the middle of the night because she needed a diaper change, I’d hear her. What if I can’t hear my own kid cryin’?”

“Joel—”

“I’m in my fifties. What if I can’t keep up because I’m too fuckin’ old?”

Tommy reaches out, clapping a hand onto his shoulder.

“Brother, I need you to take a fuckin’ breath,” he says, chuckling softly. “You’re puttin’ the weight of the world of your shoulders right now—you need to put some of it down. Look, we might not have everythin’ we used to before the world ended, but we make do with what we do have. Considerin’ just how many growin’ families we have and how many little ones we’ve got runnin’ around our town, I’d say it’s workin’ out pretty fuckin well.” He gives his shoulder an encouraging squeeze. “And as far as your ability to be a good dad, you’ve still got it, Joel. You know what to do, and so does she. I’ve seen her in action with my little boy, and it seems like she’s already got those maternal instincts, y’know?”

“Yeah, she does,” Joels agrees quietly, thinking of how you had stepped up to help him care for Ellie.

“Trust me, between the two of you, it’ll be alright.”

He peers at him. “You really believe I still got it in me?”

“I do.” Tommy smiles. “You never stopped knowin’ how to be a father, Joel. You’re gonna be just fine.”

Their patrol shift extends into the evening, turning into a double, and it’s late when he gets home.

“What the hell are you still doin’ up?” Joel asks when he finds Ellie sitting at the kitchen table, cursing to herself as she flips through the stale, yellowing pages of an old life science text book.

“What does it fucking look like, man?”

“Shouldn’t have waited until the last minute, kiddo—”

Ellie holds up a hand and cuts him off.

“Save the lecture for another time, dude. I’m busy.”

Joel rolls his eyes. “Finish up and get to bed. S’late.”

Without waiting for some smartass response, he turns on the heel of his boot and then heads upstairs to your shared bedroom. He flips on the lights only to find that you’re already in bed, fast asleep, wearing nothing but one of his t-shirts and a pair of panties. He toes off his boots and leaves them by the door, being as quiet as he possibly can as he rummages through his top drawer for some clean boxers to sleep in.

He slips into the bathroom where he takes a quick, hot shower, scrubbing off that day’s sweat, dirt, and grime. After he’s dressed and his sopping wet, salt and pepper curls are haphazardly towel dried, Joel walks back out into the bedroom where he switches off the lights and climbs into bed next to you.

He lays on his side and he’s just about to close his eyes when he feels a light shift beside him. You roll over and curl into him, your belly pressing up against his curve of his spine.

He stiffens, freezing as if someone had just placed the barrel of their pistol against his back, their finger over the trigger.

Christ, get a damn grip, he thinks silently to himself.

Joel thinks about that morning in the kitchen.

He knows his reaction had hurt you. Or rather, his lack of a reaction. His shitty ways of coping aren’t your fault, and his struggle to come to terms with your pregnancy sure as hell isn’t your fault, either. He owed it to you to try harder to be the man you needed.

The man you both needed.

Joel’s train of thought comes to a screeching halt when he feels a soft flutter against his middle of his back, the spot right where your tummy is nestled—did the baby just move?

He lies still, waiting to see if he feels it again, and when he doesn’t, he rolls over to face you, causing you to stir.

“Joel?” you mumble his name, sleepily. “What time—?”

“Shh,” Joel soothes, pulling you into his bare chest. He kisses your temple. “S’okay, baby. Go back to sleep.”

He doesn’t have to tell you twice.

Within seconds, you’re asleep again, snuggled into him and snoring softly.

Lifting a hand, he hesitates, then rests it on your belly.

He waits.

And waits.

Until the minutes turn into hours.

Until dawn’s light filters in through the lace curtains.

Until he finally feels that little flutter again.

He feels it against the palm of his hand. Faint, nothing more than a brief whisper against his skin, but there is no mistaking it.

He’d just felt the baby’s movement.

There’s a sudden shift.

Tense muscles that had been painfully wound up since the moment you’d mentioned to him your period was a week late back in the spring loosen slightly—the breath he had been holding since he’d picked up that positive pregnancy test from the bathroom counter finally falls from his lips, fanning over yours.

His fears, his worries, his uncertainties about what lies ahead, they’re all still there, of course, but he finds they are now accompanied by a glimmer of hope, a sliver of optimism that maybe, just maybe, Joel doesn’t have to be as afraid as he is.

Joel’s eyes glaze over your face, warmth radiating in his chest when you breathe a little a sigh of content in your sleep as he gently rubs your stomach through his shirt.

With his hand still splayed over your belly, he closes his eyes and begins to drift off, falling into the most decent sleep he’s had in the last few months.

Maybe his brother’s right.

Maybe he will be just fine.

divider credit to @saradika 🤍

#tw pregnancy #joel miller x you #joel miller x reader #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x pregnant reader #joel miller one shot #joel miller drabble #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller fic #fic: snapshots

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peterparkersnose · 9 months

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Hairspray

pairing: Joel Miller x fem!reader

word count: 1.7k

warnings: pregnancy, before the outbreak, established relationship with joel, sarah is a little snitch, denial, age gap (not really specified), descriptions of childbirth, money insecurity, 2003 references

a/n this was too good to give up. lets pretend that the outbreak never happened and the miller’s got to live happily ever after :)

summary Sarah finds Y/N’s hidden pregnancy tests

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read time: 6 mins 14 seconds

The phone was new. Joel had installed it a few weeks ago. No more cord! Your opposite hand felt awkward not having something to fidget with while your sister told you the horror stories of her giving birth. Something Mandy had brought up numerous times after confiding in her that you were pregnant.

It was your first; you were in your mid-20s. War was happening overseas, the world seemed to be going to shit. What a perfect time to bring a child into the world, huh? Your husband would be ecstatic, you just knew it. But the mere thought of something growing inside of you made you sick. “And then the feet came out instead! Ripped me open like-” You jumped a little. Facing the front door, you didn’t hear your husband come in from the back. His hands wrapped around your stomach as your shoulders pressed against his chest as your sister went on about telling you how her third kid cost her sixteen stitches.

A sharp gasp came from your mouth. “Are you alright? Is it the baby?” your sister yelled from the phone. Panicked, you quickly said your goodbyes to your older sister, assuring her everything was alright. You decided to give in to the kisses Joel was placing on your neck.

“What was she going on about now? Babies? Please tell me she’s not having another one.” Joel groaned. “Nope. Nine was enough for her,” you sarcastically answered. Four nieces and five nephews were enough for you to handle. Sarah enjoyed having kids her age to play with, but Uncle Joel was getting a bit too old for the rough play the younger ones enjoyed.

“What time is it?” you asked him, grabbing at his wrist. His hands were placed on your stomach almost like he knew. His watch read a little before three. “Sarah?” you asked him, swaying with him slowly. “Tommy’s coming over and we’re going to go work on a job,” he sighed.

“Again? Joel-”

“I’m sorry, It’s a quick one. Just a little steel door frame and I’ll be home late for dinner. I promise,” he said, kissing you on the cheek. You would need more cash once the baby came.

“I’ll go get her.” you sighed, but not in an angry way. You loved your stepdaughter more than anything in the world. You have known her since she was a small girl and have gotten along with her since the day you met her. She is going to be the best big sister.

Joel handed you the truck keys. Tommy’s car beeped in the driveway. “Give Tommy my love,” you called to Joel as you heard the screen door shut. --- A mainstream pop song quietly played in the truck as you waited in line at Sarah’s middle school. Parents were eager to leave and the San Antonio traffic was bound to be crazy on a Friday afternoon. You spotted your curly-haired stepdaughter as she left the school doors with some friends. You recognized a few from the sleepover she had last week. “Do you have any hairspray?” she asked, throwing her backpack in the back seat. “Yes?”

“Perfect.” Sarah responded. “May I ask why?” “Tiffany and Ashley gave me the recipe for a new oobleck!”

Sarah excitedly waved a loose-leaf piece of paper with a sparky pink gel pen scribbled all over the paper in her stepmom's face. “Hairspray is the main ingredient,” she explained, going over all the ingredients she needed. You smiled to yourself, carefully exiting the middle school parking lot as Sarah rambled about her day.

Sarah burst into the house, setting her backpack down and heading straight towards the kitchen. “Do we have any… flour?” she asked, reading off her list. “Red jar, babes.” you stated the obvious. The flour had been in there for years. “And the hairspray?” She asked. You sat down on the couch, fatigued by what you assumed was your pregnancy. Rubbing your temples, you replied, “Under my sink.”

Sarah burst into the bathroom, whipping open the cabinet door under your sink. In her excitement, the jolting movement of the door opening vaulted the zip-loc bag of pregnancy tests you had taped to the top of the cabinet out on the floor. Confused at first, she held up one of the blue sticks. Then she got it. “Y/N?” she yelled from the bathroom. Sarah was old enough to know what these were, and what two lines meant. Once she realized she was holding a stick of what you peed on, she threw it back in the pile of the rest of them sprawled out on the floor.

Sighing, you kicked your feet back on the ground. You had just gotten comfortable when Sarah called for you.

“Hm?” you asked, causally walking into your bedroom. Your tired state seemed to do a complete 180 when you saw Sarah on the ground with your tests. You froze, unsure of what to say to her. Rapidly blinking your eyes a few times to stop tears, you realized that there was no going back from this. Without a single word spoken you crouched down, collected the pregnancy test strips, and put them back in the bag. Seeing the loose pieces of tape, you used them to adhere the bag back where it was. You handed Sarah the red printed bottle of your hairspray.

“Do you want to talk about it?” you asked cautiously, sitting at the edge of the bathtub. “A-are they yours?” she anxiously asked. A small laugh came from you. “Yes,” you smiled. “I’m going to be a sister?” she asked you. You shook your head yes.

“Does Dad know?”

The world seemed to blur a bit when she asked that. You could feel your heartbeat increase at the thought. “No. Not yet.” “What!” Sarah gasped. “How long have you known?” “About three weeks.” “Three weeks!” Sarah yelled, throwing her hands in the air. “It’s difficult to… come to terms sometimes,” you said, trying to come up with the best way to explain this to Sarah. “You have to tell him. Tonight!” Sarah exclaimed.

You hated to admit that she was right.

“I don’t know Sarah, he’s out on a job with your Uncle and…” “I will call him. Try me.”

You looked at her, unsure of her new aggressive demeanor. She was always a natural leader. “Sarah, this is serious.”

“I know.” she said simply, exiting the bathroom. You followed her, watching her like a hawk for the rest of the night. And the rest of the night consisted of you making dinner, ravioli. Sarah was in the kitchen and made her ooblek and when that was done she finished her homework.

You sighed when the clock rang eight. He was more than late for supper. Sarah was asleep in your lap, the mindless cartoons played on. You watched them, trying to calm your anxious mind.

You heard Tommy’s truck pull into the driveway and saw its headlights as he left the driveway. Sarah stirred a bit, but a simple smoothing of her hair soothed her back to sleep. Joel quietly made his way into the house, only noticing the two of you when he locked the door.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered. You shrugged. Joel sat down next to you. “How is she? Is her homework done?”

“Yup.” you said coldly. “Look Y/N, I’m sorry I was late but the hardware store was out of the screws we needed and Tommy’s car was having an issue so we had to stop and get some-”

You couldn’t listen to Joel’s rambling any longer. You frankly didn’t care about some damn screws. It had to be done, and it had to be done now. Sarah was right, he deserved to know.

“I’m pregnant.”

Joel’s ramblings ended. A moment of silence lasted between the two of you. “Really?” he asked, a tiny awkward squeak coming from his voice at the end. “Mhm. Sarah found the tests. Under the sink, taped to the top of the cabinet if you want to see for yourself.”

Joel sat. “Huh,” he said, getting up from the couch and heading into the shared bathroom you guys had. He came back a moment later, his face was white as a sheet of paper.

“Can we financially do this?” you whispered, knowing Sarah was well faking her sleep and listening. Joel shrugged, plopping back down next to you. He knew this was a big issue and it would have to be discussed later. They were doing well, but Joel knew firsthand a baby on a small income was expensive. “I’m happy, if you couldn’t tell.” he said, a little bit of hope rang in his tone. “I could. My reaction was the same.” you assured him. You rested your head on his shoulder. “Everything will be okay.” he said, entwining his fingers with yours. “How long have you known?”

You seethed. “Don’t kill me.” “Maybe,” he said flirtatiously. You loved when he still flirted with you, even though you had been together forever and you were his wife. “Three weeks.”

He sighed audibly. “How far along are you?” “Don’t kill me.” you reiterated. “I have no clue. I haven't even been to a doctor yet, Mandy’s horror stories are traumatizing enough.”

“We’re making an appointment first thing tomorrow,” he assured you. You shook your head in agreement.

“Does she know?” he whispered, looking down at his daughter. He was so excited to be able to give Sarah a sibling. His bond with Tommy was unmatchable. Even though there would be a significant age gap between them, he still loved his little brother like no other. Even if they were six years apart, they were close. “She’s the one who found the tests.” you quietly chuckled, reminding Joel of what you said earlier. “She was threatening to call you at work and ‘expose me’,” you told Joel. He rolled his eyes. “Jeez, that damn kid.” he smiled, giving Sarah’s fluffy hair a pat just like you did moments before. He brought his hand back to yours and moved the back of your hand up to his lips and kissed it. “I love you,”

“I love you too,”

“And our little family.” you added. “Yes, and our little family.” Joel confirmed.

(if this story was spaced weirdly, apologies)- tag list

@dani5216 @uwiuwi @alohastyles-x @mandoloriancookie @maddieinnit0 @alexxavicry @scoliobean @avengersfan25 @nyotamalfoy @milly-louise @mxtokko @undeniableadrenaline @evyiione @qualitypudding @jmillerswife @kittenlittle24

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buckyysdoll · 4 months

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— touchy, softly possessive joel — pre!outbreak headcanons;

MAIN MASTERLIST

જ⁀➴ pictures are of no relation to size/race/age or anything else! if u like this it’s v similar to my post about being married to pre-outbreak joel miller! <3 cw: nothing really! implied sexual tension, that’s it <33 i want him so bad i’m biting my phone

❧ — is always, always wanting to touch you whenever you’ll let him (which is, obviously, always)

❧ — as in, just any skin to skin contact between you is what grounds him. keeps him steady, and strong.

❧ — a hand on the small of your back as you’re navigating crowds, or as he’s holding a door open for you to pass through.

❧ — holding hands as often as you can, even if it’s linked fingers, or just pinkies. any contact.

❧ — playing with each other’s hands almost unconsciously, too; he does it when you’re out with friends and sat beside one another. he’ll tap your fingers and intermittently bring the back of your hand to his mouth for a soft, quick kiss.

❧ — you also hold hands walking and joel does the thumb rub thing :’)

❧ — we’ve already established that joel is a soft, attentive lover and that’s no different outside the bedroom ;’)

❧ — pulls your feet into his lap when you flop down onto the couch beside him. will stroke and massage them to soothe as you tell him all about your hard day, and you’ll groan at the feeling cos god, does this man love you. joel miller loves you.

❧ — pulls you into a slow dance in the kitchen every opportunity he can get. he’d give up his life just to hear your startled laughter each time he sweeps your hand up, leads your feet

❧ — joel always puts his arm along the back of your table booth when dining out with friends — so softly possessive 😵‍💫 it’s his way of showing who you’re out with without staking claim in a more obvious way

❧ — although he’s definitely prepared for that, too. part two on jealous joel incoming soonnnn! ;)

❧ — in any case, he’ll settle for a hand on your thigh beneath the table, thumb brushing the inside seam of your jeans in steady strokes, back and forth. he knows how this gets you, and deliberately won’t look in your direction. you can see his smirk, though 😵‍💫

❧ — joel does the same while driving and it often leads to rather unsavoury roadside acts 🫣

❧ — also just kisses your hand with his eyes on the road — above your interlocked fingers. so too will he move those same joined hands to the gearstick without having to separate for a second. cos this is hot

❧ — kisses you on the lips every morning before work. will not leave without it, literally ever

❧ — if for any reason he couldn’t (like before you lived together) it would literally set the precedent for the whole rest of his day :(

❧ — when you’re pregnant, he does the same but kneels and kisses your stomach first, then your forehead or lips

❧ — always wants to hold you when you’re sleeping too, like every night without fail. he also never wants to let you leave in the morning and will groan like a baby, but you love it.

❧ — his arm is literally like a vice around your waist, warm and heavy and it’s the safest place in the whole entire world, to your eyes.

❧ — quick gestures of affection all the time. physical touch as his main love language ! forehead and temple kisses, kisses to the crown of your head, the inside of your wrists

❧ — joel inhales the scent of your hair all the time !! it’s his comfort just to drown in your nearness. he wraps his arms tight around you from behind, with his face in your neck and his stubble all scratchy :’)

❧ — holds your waist, has his hands on your hips as he gently moves behind you, as he tries to get past 🫠

❧ — is always mindful of making sure that you want to be touched before he does, though. that man can read you like a book, and knows all your tells; knows the silent language your body speaks

❧ — he’ll lay on the couch and just open his arms for you to come into after a long day; and again — it’s genuinely the safest place on earth, in his arms, in his scent.

❧ — maybe more will come later !??? -> more along the lines of insecure (jealous 🤭) joel xox

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thewritersaddictions · 6 months

Text

Day Twenty-Five: Joel Miller + Pregnancy

Your belly wasn't huge just yet. Four months along and you were growing more beautiful by the day. Joel was scared at first when you told him that you were pregnant. Then all that feared melted away into happiness. A deep seeded happiness he hadn't felt in a long time. Not to say that you didn't make him happy, Joel just never thought he'd get the chance again.

You'd grown fuller in the days leading up to the fourth month of your pregnacy. Your hips a little bit wider, shirt a little bit tighter that were already opting to borrow Joels much looser shirts.

The thing that Joel loved the most about your pregnancy so far had been the way your breasts had only grown along side your belly.

Joel would lay next to you almost every morning. His head pressed into the soft plush breasts that had become his new pillows over the past few months.

This morning was like no other, Joel's black curls tickling your exposed skin as the morning sun fluttered in through moth eaten curtains. Your arm wrapped around the older man in a gently, and doting way. You didn't dare move as not to stir the man awake.

You just watched as his body moved up and down with every long and deep breathe he took. His head once again rested in the valley of your breasts. You moved your hand slightly in an effort to comb through the black curls that were peppered with grey.

"Good mornin' sweetheart." Joels morning voice is a mix of just the right amount of texas drawl, and rusty morning voice and it makes you heat up instantly. "Mornin' baby." Continuing to stare down at Joel, "You know starin' is rude." You roll your eyes.

Joel moves ever so slightly to get a bit more comfortable. "Look at that belly of yours." Joel loves the way you look, and loves it even more now that you have started wearing his clothes. Right now though is his favorite. Your naked body under a thin layer of sheet. You're beautiful, and everything to him.

You can feel the hard on Joel is sporting as it presses into your thigh. He ruts into your plushy thighs a few times absent mindly. 'So pretty in the mornin' baby. Did you know that?" He asks, you hum closing your eyes. As Joel starts to caress his hands up and down your body. Doing circles on your protruding belly.

"Ya did? I think I'll tell you again just how much I love your body." Joel whispers into your skin. His hands are getting ever so closer to your heat. You can't help but want to lure him in, so you spread your legs open.

"Are you trying to seduce me darlin'?" Joel asks, sounding more awake by the second. "Maybe." You tease, he eyes you for a moment longer before reaching down between your open thighs. Collect two fingers worth of slick. When he brings his hand from between your legs. You watch as he archs a brow, and then sticks his fingers into his mouth.

Moaning around them, "Taste so sweet for me baby." He murmurs. Joels shifts once again. His elbow digging into the bed, giving him a better advantage as he take a nipple into his mouth. He sucks on the bud bringing it to life as then he starts to divide his attention. His mouth plays with your tit, and his hand plays with your clit.

Wet fingers playing and teasing your clit sends shotting nevers up and down your back. Moans hit the twenty plus year old walls in the small apartment. When Joel slips two of his longest fingers into you, your wet walls pull him in. He pulls off of your harden, and redden nipple with a smirk. "So fuckin' tight sweetheart. God I fuckin' love it." His hips rut into yours, as you feel his hard on pulse againt you.

"I can feel you pulsing agasint my fingers, you turned on by just my mouth, and fingers baby?" It's not really a question to be answered, Joel already knows that answer. As he continues to finger you, your head falling back into the pillow. Legs starting to twitch, Joel can see all that you're right on the edge.

Your breathing picks up, your legs start to shake harder then ever before. Your toes curl as your walls tighten around Joels fingers. "There's you go sweetness, cum all over my fingers baby. Do it for me." He doesn't need to coax you but you fall over the edge at his words.

Once again moans boucnes on the wall, and your thigh feels sticky. Joel doesn't take long to get up cleaning up his mess on him, and your thigh before taking care of you. A water for you to sip on. "Damn hot mama." He says as he walks stark naked back into the room. Holding that water in his hands. "You're so beautiful baby." He says as he lays back down in his spot.

Completed on: 08/14/23

Posted on: 10/25/23

Kinktober 23- @lanad3lreyscokewhor3 @homelanderscumdump @hummusxx@chvnsdimple @vvitzvafflezvv @lokisivy @claud-blood0703 @iliketoreads-stuff @all-that-glitters-is-treasure@clearscissorsbonkgiant-blog @lxonix--ac @piecesofx @mortallyswimmingpainter @playwithfire99 @fucak @everythingneytiri @lovetheos @xxxxxoseungxoooo @durazopato @hotpead42069 @oddseabiscuit @capoda @witching-hour @viviwows @lover103 @alexlovesfiction @katiecat10 @electricfans @jianasmind @max-505 @powerbun21o @the-horny-simp @missy420-0 @jaq-dav @arescosplays

The Last Of Us Master list // Kinktober '23

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cowgurrrl · 1 year

Text

darlin’ i’d wait for you

Pairing: Joel Miller x fem!reader (plus platonic Ellie Williams x fem!reader)

Author’s note: Inspired by my real life love for my godchildren. Mis almas, no hay nadie que ame más que tú. Gracias por elegirme.

Summary: “Ten fingers. Ten toes. And even if you had none of them, you’d still be the grandest thing I’ve ever seen.” - Emily Henry, Beach Read aka you and Joel have a baby [3.0k]

Warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI, descriptions of labor and delivery (nothing graphic), swearing, lots of emotions, fluff

"You need to be resting!" Maria says as you pace the living room with your hands on your hips. Ellie is watching you move from her space in the kitchen, her knee bouncing with anxiety as she sits there.

"You need to find Joel!"

"Tommy's getting him right now. Please, just lay down."

"I'm fine," another contraction ripples through your body, and you grip the back of the couch. "Fuck! I can't believe Joel convinced me to do this again!" You yell. The pain tightens in your lower abdomen, and you drop your head to the cushions, unable to focus on anything else. Strong hands press against the small of your back, applying the perfect counter pressure to your contraction. The tension releases just enough for you to pick your head up and find Maria standing over your shoulder, a knowing look in her eyes. No words need to be exchanged for her to know how grateful you are for her presence.

The contractions have been coming and going since late last night, but you didn't think much of it. They were sporadic and not painful enough to make you think you were in labor. You had false contractions with Jane and expected the same thing with this one, except that these contractions became very real very fast. Joel was already out on patrol when you had Ellie run to Tommy and Maria's for additional help because they were getting so bad. This baby is coming soon.

"Do you have a bag ready to go?" Maria asks as the contraction ends, and you nod, pushing yourself up.

"In our bedroom closet, but it's missing some stuff."

"Okay, tell me what you need, and I'll pack it."

"I can do it."

"Honey, if you walk up those stairs, there's no way you'll make it back down." She says, and you sigh. Reluctantly, you list some last-minute things that need to get thrown in the bag and where they'll be. Maria turns on her heels and sprints up the stairs, ever a woman on a mission. Ellie walks over to you as Maria's figure disappears, standing awkwardly near you as you hold your belly.

"I'm sorry. I'm not trying to scare you." You say, wrapping her in a hug or as much of a hug as you can manage with the baby in between you. She relaxes and lets out a big breath as you rub her back.

"I feel like I should be the one comforting you."

"I've done this before. I know what I'm doing."

"Yeah, but that was before," the fear in her voice rattles you to your core, and you pull away to look at her. Her bottom lip is cracked and bleeding from her teeth worrying at it all morning, and she looks like the scared kid you met in Boston. "You really should be on the way to the hospital."

"As soon as Joel gets here, I'll go, okay?" You say, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear. She shakes her head, and you open your mouth to say something more, but the vice grip returns, and you grip her shoulders. Your head bows under the weight of the pain, and you clutch Ellie like a lifeline.

"Okay, they're getting closer together. Maria!" Ellie yells as she holds you upright. You vaguely register Maria rushing down the stairs and telling Ellie something, but you don't have enough energy to listen. Time could've stopped right there, and you would've had no way of knowing. No stab wound, gunshot, or punch even comes close to this pain level. Your breathing is uneven, and you can feel yourself sweating bullets despite the cool August air. You thought you were ready. You thought you knew what to expect after Jane, but this is different. You wonder why you thought you could have another baby as the contraction fades. Maria says your name, and you pick your head up from Ellie's shoulder.

"We need to get you to the hospital right now. Joel will meet us there." She says, but you shake your head, the lump of panic in your throat tightening. Memories of begging your mom, Jane's dad, friends, or anyone to come to the hospital so you wouldn't be alone replay in your head. You were alone and scared and sixteen fucking years old when you had Jane on a stormy Tuesday morning. The nurses looked at you like a kicked puppy and mumbled, "a baby having a baby," under their breaths when they left you to cry alone while holding your newborn.

"No, no, no. Joel's not here yet. I'm not going without him."

"I promise that Tommy will bring him to you. I'm sure they're on their way back now."

"I'm not going by myself!" The harshness in your tone makes everybody in the room pause. "I've already done this alone once, and I'm not fucking doing it again. So, we are going to wait for Joel even if I have this baby on the fucking floor! Do you understand me?"

"Hey," Ellie says softly. "Hey, you're not alone. At all. We're all here because we love you and want you to be safe. Nobody is going to leave, okay?" She says, rubbing your back as tears fill your eyes.

"I can't do this." without her, you want to add, but you don't. Ellie pushes the sweaty hair out of your eyes and holds your face so you can look at her. Your breath is shaky, and you feel like you could shatter into a million pieces, but her brown eyes are looking into yours so intently that you have no choice but to look back.

"You can. You can do this. You're doing so good. You're going to have this baby, and it'll probably be the cutest fucking baby ever. And we'll all make stupid faces at it and love it even though I don't even think I like most babies, and you'll be okay. Both of you," her eyes don't move from yours as she speaks, even when you start crying. "You're not alone, but I can tell you're in pain, and we need to get to the hospital before it gets worse, okay?" She asks, and you take a shaky breath before nodding. Ellie and Maria seem to let out sighs of relief at the same time, and they start ushering you to the door when it opens.

"I'm here! I'm here! I'm sorry I'm late," Joel yells as he and Tommy run in. He smiles and runs over and kisses you. You have half a mind to smack him for looking so giddy when you're in so much pain, but let him kiss you anyway. "You ready to have a baby?" He asks as another contraction tightens in your stomach, making you squeeze him tightly. You don't get to see your family scrambling to get out the door, but you feel it. Bags and coats find owners as your entourage helps support you down the steps of your home and on the path to the hospital.

Four contractions come and go on the way to the hospital doors, where Maria, Tommy, and Ellie cheer and promise to wait there until you're ready for them. "Almost there, baby. We're gonna get you all the good drugs, okay?" Joel tells you quietly as he flags down a nurse and a wheelchair for you. The nurse asks rapid-fire questions as she rushes you into a delivery room, and Joel does his best to answer them. You curl into yourself the second your body hits the hospital bed, yet another contraction hitting you, but this time with a familiar splitting pain. You're not going to have time for the good drugs.

The rest is a blur of doctors, nurses, questions, and Joel whispering praises into your temple. Your vision struggles to focus on anything as pain radiates from your hips to your back and up your spine. It's excruciating and dizzying, and you think you'd throw up if you weren't so focused on getting this fucking kid out. "One more, baby. One more push, and then it's over." Joel tells you. You don't respond. You can't. All the blood rushes through your ears, and you squeeze his hand hard. For a moment, the whole world stops, and tears fall down Joel's face as the tiny baby is placed on your chest. You gasp and hold them close as they screech, announcing their arrival loudly.

"It's a girl!" Someone announces, and you laugh weakly, struggling to catch your breath. You look down at your daughter and kiss her head as she continues to cry.

"You're okay. I've got you. We're okay, sweetheart. You're safe," you tell her, rubbing her back. Joel reaches out to trace the apple of her cheek and grabs her tiny hand. You and Joel join her crying, everything besides your family becoming obsolete. Joel presses a chaste kiss to your lips and smiles when you laugh against him. "I told you so." You say, and he laughs.

"You were right," he says. "I'm so proud of you." He kisses you again as your daughter cries beautifully on your chest. Jane didn't cry at first when she was born, effectively scaring the shit out of you and everyone else in the room, but when she finally did, it was like you were breathing for the first time, too. You think this may be the first time since her death that you've felt that much peace.

Joel cuts the cord, and the room devolves into a controlled madness with nurses and doctors calling things back and forth to each other. You don't care. The little girl on your chest has settled down and tucked her head under your chin, listening to your rapid heartbeat and recognizing the pattern. "We're right here, baby girl. We're not going anywhere, okay?" You whisper to her, kissing her over and over again. She smiles, and you immediately recognize Joel's crooked smile— nine months of carrying her and a record-breakingly fast delivery for her to be his twin.

"Mama, we're gonna take her to get cleaned up and get her measurements, okay? The doctor's working on getting you fixed up, too." A nurse says, and you nod.

"Just be careful, please. I made her from scratch, and it took a really fucking long time." You say as you pass her to the nurse. Everyone, including Joel, laughs even though you're serious. Joel leaves your side only to follow the nurse to the other side of the room, watching her every movement meticulously. You keep eyes on both of them. She starts fussing as the nurse cleans her up, and Joel reaches out to smooth her hair. He says something to her that you can't hear and watch him start crying again. She settles down again, but Joel is a mess. The nurse offers him a tissue, and you laugh to yourself but don't do anything to get his attention.

Let them have their secret conversation. You have a feeling it will be the first of many.

She's asleep, but you can't stop looking at her. Joel is lying in the hospital bed with you as she rests in his arms, your chin hooked over his shoulder so you can stare at her. The little girl who gave you enough excitement for a lifetime is bundled up in a white blanket with a striped hat covering her dark hair. Her legs are long and skinny, but she's strong, grasping anything within reach.

She has his nose and lips, but your eyes match. Her little chest rises and falls steadily, and little sighs come from her occasionally as she sleeps. Her hand somehow escaped the swaddle, and her fingers flex around the blanket's fabric like she's trying to decide whether she likes it. Joel reaches for her tiny hand and tries to tuck it away again, but she resists, making an angry face until he lets go. You laugh and melt simultaneously at her actions.

"She's perfect," you whisper as you kiss Joel's shoulder. He hums and turns to kiss your temple. "How did we get so lucky?"

"I've no idea," he whispers back. "Thank you."

"For what?"

"Her. This. Making me a dad again." His voice is so tender and raw that your eyes mist up again. You sniffle and wipe your eyes.

"Anytime, cowboy," you rest your hand on her chest to feel the little heartbeat you made from nothing but stardust and blood. Her face scrunches up in her sleep before her little fingers find yours. "Well, maybe not anytime, but you know what I meant."

"Oh, 'm ready for another one right now."

"Never in a million fucking years could you convince me to do that again."

"You did great." He says, and you smile. You're both exhausted and should be sleeping, but you can't stop looking at the life you created together. She's not even a day old, and you know you would tear the world into a thousand pieces if she asked you to. You would do anything for her.

"D'you still like the name we picked?" You ask, and he nods.

"Do you?"

"I think it's perfect for her."

"Hey, guys," a nurse peeks her head in the door. "Are we ready for some visitors?" She asks. You nod, and Joel adjusts baby girl in his arms. Her little arm reaches up in a stretch, and she fusses when she loses the grip on your hand. You tell her you're not far, and Joel bounces her.

"Hey," Ellie says softly as she enters the room. You smile and sit up, ignoring the jarring pain in your hips at the movement. "Oh, my God. How are you feeling?" She asks as she hugs you like she's afraid she'll break you if she holds you too tight. You rub her back and kiss her head.

"I'm okay. I delivered pretty much the second they could get me to lay down."

"I knew we should've gone to the hospital sooner!" Ellie says, and Joel shushes her. She makes an eek face as she looks at him.

"A baby's tryin' to sleep here."

"Holy shit," she breathes, taking in the bundle in Joel's arms for the first time. "Girl or boy?"

"I'm pretty sure the Millers are only capable of having girls at this point," you say, and Ellie smiles. "Do you wanna hold her?"

"Can I?" She asks as Joel stands. She's unsure what to do but copies Joel's position and puts a hand under her back.

"Support her head," Joel instructs quietly as he carefully transitions your daughter into Ellie's arms.

"I got it. I got it," she says. Instinctively, she starts swaying back and forth and patting the baby's back. Joel stays nearby, watching as Ellie gets comfortable holding her. Your heart could explode seeing the three of them together. "Who are you?" She asks quietly, pulling the blanket under the baby's chin so she can see her.

"This is Charlotte Elaine Miller," you say. "Charlie, for short."

"Hey there, Charlie girl. My name's Ellie."

"She's your big sister." Joel adds. Even though he's talking to Charlie, he's looking at Ellie. She takes a shaky breath as she processes his words. He wraps an arm around her shoulders and kisses her forehead.

"I'm one of your big sisters," she says. The pregnancy hormones and the day's emotions catch up with you, and you couldn’t stop the tears even if you wanted to. Something about seeing Ellie with Charlie hits you hard. "I've got so much to teach you and tell you about when you're a little bigger, though. There's not much I can do with you right now except, well, this," She shrugs as if to make her point to the sleeping baby, and you laugh. Charlie stretches again, probably getting used to having so much room now that she's out of you, and yawns. "Oh, big yawn. Good job." Ellie praises.

"You're a natural," Joel says, making her smile.

"I dunno about that, but she does like me. Right, Charlie girl?" she asks, and the Charlie girl in question chuffs. "Oh, we're gonna have so much fun together." She says sincerely. Joel meets your eyes, sending you a knowing look and a crooked smile, and you smile back a little sadly. He works at his jaw, and his Adam's apple bobs as his eyes sparkle with tears again. No words need to be exchanged. You know. You may be one of the only people who know. Ellie rambles to Charlie, ever the present audience, and you remember, silent and pious in your devotion.

You think you'll spend your whole life remembering, a constant scramble for pieces of memories that bring her closer. You think you'll find bits of her in music, the summer sun, and your girls' eyes. You think you'll tell Charlie of her big sisters, who were loved and cherished beyond belief, and their shared adoration of Patti Smith. You think you'll be able to find a way to talk about her that doesn't feel like your soul is desperately ripping away from you. For Sarah, Jane, Ellie, and now Charlie, you think you would do anything.

Even after so much loss, destruction, and nights spent hopelessly staring at the wall like it would be enough to start Jane's heart again, you think you would do it all again. The world can be a really shitty place, and you've seen firsthand how horrible people can be to each other. You and Joel have been a million different versions of awful people, and you can never escape that. But you have Ellie and Charlie. And each other. And for a moment, in this horribly lit hospital room, every minute of that misery has meaning.

💓

taglist: @evyiione @nyotamalfoy @abbyhaslongshorts

#the last of us #joel and ellie #joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller fic #the last of us x reader #joel tlou #ellie williams #joel miller the last of us #joel miller fluff #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x pregnant reader #big sister Ellie Williams #there’s such an Easter egg in the baby’s name #first person to look up the name meanings gets a kiss on the mouth #look for the light

1K notes · View notes

outoftheseine · 2 months

Text

- JOEL MILLER FIC RECS PART 2 -

forever in love with this grumpy old man <3 | note: please be aware of the authors’ warnings before reading. fics include canon tw’s like: violence, death, grief. most of these fics are age-gap relationship and some have 18+ content so minors please DNI.

part 1 | main masterlist

SERIES - MULTI-CHAPTERS

love in the middle of a fireflight | part 2 | part 3 • joel miller x fem!reader

↳ by @babydin

your bear | part 2 • joel miller x daughter!reader

↳ by @rrickgrrimes8 (very angsty, hurt/comfort)

a helping hand • joel miller x fem!reader

↳ by @teacupcollector

a lover's pinch • prof!joel miller x fem!reader

↳ by @hier--soir (smut, au, angst, secret relationship)

i will be home for christmas • joel miller x fem!reader

↳ by @punkshort (no outbreak, fluff, smut, angst but happy ending, hurt/comfort)

lavender • joel miller x fem!reader

↳ by @justagalwhowrites

seeing you, seeing me • joel miller x fem!reader

↳ by @amywritesthings (slow burn, smut)

fate, after all • joel miller x f!oc!reader

↳ by @honeyedmiller (fluff, smut, no-outbreak)

ambush | part 2 • joel miller x reader

↳ by @huntergarrity (angst, violence, hurt/comfort)

seams • joel miller x reader

↳ by @fuckyeahdindjarin (self-conscious!joel, shy!reader, fluff, slow burn, explicit)

soft!joel collection • joel miller x fem!reader

↳ by @cavillscurls (smut, fluff, angst, soft and domestic!joel)

ONE-SHOTS - BLURBS - HC’S

daisy, give me an answer • joel miller x fem!reader

↳ by @dilf-din (fluff)

take this moment • joel miller x reader

↳ by @mylostloversbookmarks (post-outbreak, fluff)

ground me • joel miller x reader

↳ by @huntergarrity (fluff, comfort)

clouded judgement/clear mind • joel miller x fem!reader

↳ by @bluebeary-jay (violence, angst, hurt/comfort)

keep your eyes on me • joel miller x fem!reader

↳ by @mgparker (angst, violence, protective!joel)

daydreams • joel miller x fem!reader

↳ by @morning-star-joy (grumpy x sunshine, fluff)

i hope you are happy • joel miller x reader

↳ by @blissfulbarbie (very angsty, no outbreak)

grays • joel miller x reader

↳ by @softlyspector (domestic fluff, insecure!joel)

sweet creature • dad!joel miller x reader

↳ by @rocketrhap3000 (so fluffy)

lacy • joel miller x reader

↳ by @toxic-seduction (angst but happy ending)

bloodshed, crimson clover • joel miller x fem!doctor!reader

↳ by @morning-star-joy (slow burn, angst, violence)

arms tonite • joel miller x reader

↳ by @motherjoel (angst, reader gets hurt, happy ending)

skater • joel miller x platonic!gn!reader

↳ by @rrickgrrimes8 (angst, hurt/comfort, father figure!joel, tw: drowning)

be my daddy • joel miller x fem!reader

↳ by @bastardmandennis (no outbreak, smut, fluff, slightly angsty)

how the cookie crumbles • joel miller x fem!reader

↳ by @egcdeath (no outbreak, fake dating, slow burn, slight angst, fluff, idiots in love)

day after tomorrow • joel miller x reader

↳ by @familyvideostevie (no outbreak, fluff)

it’s your turn for choosing • joel miller x reader

↳ by @familyvideostevie (modern au, fluff)

i’m a feminist obviously • joel miller x reader

↳ by @toxic-seduction (protective!joel, violence)

softness • post outbreak!joel miller x fem!reader

↳ by @joelsgreys (fluff, joel is a dad, tw: premature birth)

as long as i have you • jackson era!joel miller x fem!reader

↳ by @beskarandblasters (very fluffy, slight angst)

sweetheart • post-outbreak!joel millet x fem!reader

↳ by @joels-shitty-puns (fluff, light angst)

are you mine? • joel miller x fem!reader

↳ by @eupheme (protective and soft!joel, fluff, light angst)

a forever thing • husband!joel miller x pregnant!wife!reader

↳ by @honeyedmiller (fluff)

the revenant wife • joel miller x fem!reader

↳ by @pettyprocrastination

butterfly • joel miller x black!latina!reader

↳ by @stargirlfics (angst, hurt/comfort, fluff, slow burn)

unlikely friends • joel miller x reader

↳ by @sweetercalypso (fluff)

mischief nights • joel miller x fem!reader

↳ by @jupiter-soups (fluff, slight angst)

all my casualties of love • joel miller x reader/oc

↳ by @agentmarcuspike (smut, grief)

a matter of timing • joel miller x baker!fem!reader

↳ by @lavenderursa (angst, smut, comfort, neighbours to lovers)

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januaryembrs · 23 days

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SUCH A PRETTY HOUSE | Joel Miller x Reader

request: Can you do Joel miller x reader no surprises by radio head angst fic

description: Joel remembers that one summer he knew her, and the ten year scar it left him.

word count: 1.6k

warnings: Pregnant!Reader, major character death (canon to TLOU and also reader dies, not explicit,), guns, death, violence. Joel feels unworthy, mentions of Sarah.

authors notes: em tries not to write something heart wrenching challenge, go.

There weren’t many things that meant something to Joel anymore. The day cordyceps took over the world, it took almost everything in him with it. Whatever was left made room for anger and resentment to curl inside him, make its home in his bones, make him lash out at everyone who wasn’t Tess.

But he felt himself make an exception the day he met her.

He’d been entirely sceptical when Tess told him she’d been able to find someone on a radio channel who could help them with supplies. It would mean sneaking out of QZ, a dumb move even on a good day, and trusting a stranger that was all but promising them candy if they climbed into his van. He wasn’t a stupid man, not by any means. But Tess had this way of bending his resolve, pushing him further and further if it meant they could come out better in the end.

When they’d arrived to Frank and Bill’s for the first time, they were gobsmacked to see an entire street of houses cordoned off with barbed wire and explosives, as if it had never been touched by cordyceps, as if they’d catapulted into a time before people were eaten alive and before the world ended. A quaint little town with dusty cars and clean streets and houses and empty shops and gardens full of wildflowers and strawberries.

Joel felt like he might be sick, but perhaps that was something between jealousy and caution just playing on his tongue.

A spritely man a little older than him bounded down the stairs to the first house on the left, piercing blue eyes looking over them with the same excitement of a puppy being told to play fetch. There was no way a man so jolly could have done all of this himself.

“Tess?” He called, and Joel remembered the way Tess smiled sweetly, because she was just as stunned as he was that they were in some sort of utopia, a little fence and a gate the only thing between them and how things used to be.

“It’s Frank, right?” She guessed, and it was then that Joel heard the caution, “Didn’t you say there was two of you?”

“Yes, Bill, my-” He stopped himself short, as if he didn’t quite know what to call him. He breezed over the hesitation quickly, buzzing in on the remote the combination, looking then to Joel, “You must be Joel,”

Joel gave him a nod, his fingers tightening on the shotgun in his hand. It wasn’t even a split second after the gate started to slide open that another man emerged from the house, his face thunderous as he barrelled down the stairs and towards where they stood.

“Frank, didn’t I tell you to wait,” He snapped, his brows strained into a frown, a gun of his own in his palms, “We need to make sure she’s ready, they could be infected-”

“She?” Joel cut in it a biting tone of his own, “Who’s she? You said there was two-”

“Bill,” Frank warned, as the shorter man produced a scanner out of his pocket and ran it over both of their necks. Joel knew this Bill could feel the heat of his glare on the side of his head, though as soon as the screen lit up green for both of them, he saw him take a sigh of relief. “We’re never going to make any more friends if you keep shoving them away,”

Joel couldn’t really blame him for worrying.

It wasn’t until they saw the door opposite theirs swing open that he understood even more why Bill was so unwelcoming.

He should have seen it before, the sweet hanging baskets full of lupines and primrose, the luscious lawn trimmed and primped, lined with tended bluebonnets and sunflowers beaming at the woman that emerged from the fresh white house with a bright grin, like she was their sun and they smiled back at her in awe.

She wore a white sundress, long enough to touch her knees, and it flowed with the warm breeze as they stepped past the threshold to the town, her feet bare save for some little brown sandals that seemed in better condition than he’d expect. Her face glowed with excitement, gaze switching between him and Tess, and her figure was full and soft at the same time.

It wasn’t until she got closer he could see where her stomach pulled against the fabric obtusely and it was like a sadness washed over the two of them as she finally got close enough to talk.

She was pregnant.

“You must be Tessa! Frank told me all about you,” She said, pulling the woman in for a warm hug Tess didn’t seem to have much of a choice in.

“It’s Tess,” His companion corrected, though she gave her a light squeeze back, and her face softened out as if she didn’t seem to mind the intrusion, nor the new name.

Bill froze up at the sight of her tugging Joel closer the minute she'd released Tess, ignoring every boundary his standoffish expression could possibly set, and it was like he understood why the flowers twinkled up at her. She was warm, incredibly so to the point even when he didn’t return the gesture, he felt himself conscious of how rough his skin was and how hard the gun must have been pressing against her chest where it squished in between them and how he hoped to god it wasn’t hurting her or the baby.

He felt cruel the minute she pulled away, crueller than he usually felt, but his frown never wavered, not even when she simpered at him, despite Bill saying her name in a worried tone.

“Just ignore him, he would bubble wrap me if he could,” She whispered to Joel, and her laugh was a tinkling bell in the wind. She grabbed Tess’s hand in a quick and gentle motion, walking her up the pathway back to her house, and Joel could have sworn he heard the promise of ice tea leave her lips.

“I’m so pleased to have another woman around,” She said to Tess, who looked as if she was fighting back a feathery happiness of her own around the woman who seemed too good to be true in a world so harsh as this one.

Joel knew he would have his work cut out for him trying not to get attached.

Ellie knew she was on thin ice already. For a girl of only fourteen, she was incredibly perceptive of people’s feelings, especially the grumpy, grey haired bastard that had just lost perhaps the only woman who meant anything to him. She had to admit Tess’s death made her feel like she was some sort of unlucky charm, like anyone who so much as got close to her was doomed from the word ‘go’.

She hated herself for it, and she assumed from Joel’s silence and the way he’d stormed out of Bill and Frank’s house as soon as she’d read that letter that he hated her too.

That was until she saw him walking across the street to the house with dead flower beds and smashed windows and no sign of life that she thought perhaps she wasn’t entirely the problem.

She found him in the bedroom, laying on the double mattress with his eyes closed, though she knew he wasn’t sleeping. The walls were a pretty sort of posy pink, the sheets an intricate pattern of doves and white lilies, and a little painting on the nightstand of two women smiling at one another, one so clearly being Tess while the other remained an enigma.

It wasn’t until she spotted the cradle next to the bed that her heart sank into her stomach.

“Bill and Frank weren’t the first ones to die, were they?” Ellie asked softly, and he shook his head wordlessly, “Was it yours? The…” The baby.

She couldn’t bring herself to say it. She wouldn’t put it past him to yell at her for prying.

He lay there like a wounded animal, and he shocked her when he actually spoke.

“It wasn’t mine,” His voice was gravelly, hardened, yet worn out all the same, “But we were going to-” He stopped for a moment, taking a deep breath, “We were going to raise it together, the two of us. Tess was supposed to be godmother,”

He remembered the way she used to call her Tessa, and how Tess didn’t seem to mind it so much once she saw how truly sickly sweet she was to her core, and how she said it so full of love, the way you could only love your best friend. He remembered how he kissed her, a few months after that first time he’d seen her, how he’d kissed her and pulled her close and how they’d slept in that room together, and how he’d promised her everything was going to be okay because he was going to protect her and that baby.

Joel remembered thinking that was his second chance. How he knew it wouldn’t bring Sarah back, nothing could ever, but maybe his sweet girl and that baby would be his chance to prove that he could save someone, that he could do some good.

“What happened? Where’s the baby?” Ellie asked too intrusively, hoping he didn’t shut her out entirely after this, but she had to know. She had to know who the pretty woman in the picture was, and why Tess, even the little splotch of paint she was now, looked at her so besotted that Ellie had to have answers now. She had to know why they had never spoken about her and why Joel seemed to be giving up on her now. Like Tess had pushed him over the edge of a sadness years in the making.

She didn’t think he would reply, but then; “One night, raiders came while me and Tess were getting her supplies from the city. Few weeks before she was due.” She heard his voice deepen into something dark and angry, “She didn’t stand a chance.”

And Ellie never brought her up again after that day, only once to ask her name, and neither did Joel. He left his sweet girl and whatever he could have been in that pretty house, put her in a box in his chest right next to Sarah, until it didn’t hurt so much to think about her.

#Joel miller x reader #Joel miller fanfiction #joel miller x pregnant reader #Pedro pascal x reader #Pedro pascal fanfiction #the last of us imagine #the last of us x reader

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joekeeryswife · 10 days

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Outbreak Day - J.M

a/n: hello angels! reader is 26 and pregnant and Joel is 36. there is a little twist 😵 best way to describe this imagine is that it’s sad, long and has a shitty ending lmfao. okay anyways, enjoy reading 🫶 please send me in some fluffy requests and some dad! joel requests too!!

big trigger warning this imagine is very gory and descriptive!

“Sarah honey, is that you?” you turned to look at the front door and saw your step daughter Sarah coming home from school. “hey mum” she said as she set her backpack down on the floor. “how was school?” you walked toward her and gave her a small hug and a kiss on her forehead.

“was good. got dads watch fixed but everyone acting weird, cops everywhere, shops closing early. i don’t know just weird” she said making your heart pound a little, you didn’t know why but hearing her say that scared you but you tried not to dwell on it too much. “yeah well it’s probably just people being stupid. we shouldn’t worry too much okay?” she nodded but then groaned making you frown.

“dad told the Adlers i’d go over there to help them make cookies” she sighed, it wasn’t that she didn’t like the Adlers it was just she wanted to spend time with you and her dad as it was his birthday. “look, go there for thirty minutes then say i need you home, i don’t mind you blaming me.” she smiled and thanked you.

“i was going to make your dad a cake but we don’t have the ingredients and i was too tired to go food shopping so he should be brining one home, he’s going to be home earlier today as well” her eyes lit up as you spoke “is it a chocolate cake?” she asked watching you nod. “i didn’t tell him it was because you have been craving one i told him it was because i was” Joel hated chocolate cake but for his girls he’d do anything to please them.

“thank you mum, you’re the best. i owe you one” she said as she turned to go out the front door again to the Adlers house. “no worries honey, if Mrs Adler bakes chocolate chip cookies please bring me one, the baby is craving them like mad” you said as you rubbed your growing stomach. she nodded and said her goodbyes before leaving to spend the worst 30 minutes of her life with the Adlers.

-♡-

“hey baby girl. how was school?” Joel asked as he finally got home, four hours later than expected. “you’re late” she said, completely ignoring his question as her eyes shifted from the TV to him. you had both been waiting for him on the sofa watching Harry Potter and you had fallen asleep not even halfway through the movie. being pregnant had made you extremely tired so it wasn’t a shock to Sarah when she saw you put a blanket over yourself and curl up into a ball on the sofa within the first 10 minutes of the movie playing.

“i know, im sorry. work has been crazy, guys calling in sick, it was just me, uncle Tommy and Dave in today. i meant to phone mum but my phone died” he said as he made his way over to the two of you. his heart melted when he saw you sleeping next to Sarah, you’d never looked cuter. “its fine, we had fun without you anyways” he lifted up your feet so he could sit between you both, careful to not wake you up in the process.

“did you at least get the cake?” she said shyly as Joel got comfortable on the sofa. “oh shit” he put his head in his hands “im sorry honey i completely forgot” she nodded, understanding that he obviously came straight home as soon as he finished work. “mum is probably gonna kill you. she wanted cookies earlier from the Adlers but they were making raisin instead of chocolate chip so i didn’t even bother asking if i could bring one home for her” Sarah said and Joel wrapped his arm around her shoulders, his other resting on your legs.

“i’ll get you guys a cake tomorrow, i promise it just completely slipped my mind” she shook her head, indicating that it was fine and she understood he was stressed. Joel felt you stir and you woke up, your hair all over the place and your bones cracking as you stretched from a very good nap. “hi baby” Joel said softly as you looked at him.

he unwrapped his arms from Sarah’s shoulders for a moment so he could give you a hug and a kiss. “i miss you so much” you said as you sat up so you could rest on him instead of the arm of the sofa. “i missed you too. how are you? how’s the baby?” you nodded, still half asleep.

“fine, kicking like crazy” you were only six months pregnant and your unborn daughter was already giving you a hard time. you rested your head on his chest as he wrapped his arms around both you and Sarah, pulling you both into him. “did you bring home the cake?” you asked making him sigh “no, i’m sorry baby, i forgot” you shrugged, eyes closing again as you tried to fight sleep but it was no use.

“i love mum so much but she could have slept through world war 2 and not have been disturbed at all” she said making Joel laugh quietly, trying not to wake you up. to be fair, carrying this baby had knackered you out and he understood that you needed sleep but sometimes you would be halfway through a conversation with him when he got home from work and you’d be falling asleep whilst you were taking. “to be fair, you aren’t wrong there” he ran a hand through your hair gently as he admired you, you were stunning and he loved you so much.

“anyway, let’s try spend some time together tonight, let’s put on a good film, this is shit” Joel said making Sarah scoff and look at him “that is a lie. Harry Potter is the best” he shook his head. “take it back or you work get your present” she said making him gasp. “you wouldn’t dare do that” he said to her, making her give him the ‘try me’ face which made him quickly change his comment and apologise to her.

she grabbed the box off of the coffee table and handed it to him. he unwrapped his arm from her yet again to try open it with one hand without waking you up. he opened the box and saw his now fixed watched that had been broken for three months. “aww baby that’s so sweet, thank you” he kissed her forehead and tried to put the watch on but failed miserably making Sarah help him put it on. “okay now we can watch your stupid old film dad but don’t expect me to stay awake” she said as they both got comfortable again “i wouldn’t dream of it” he smiled at her.

-♡-

green and blue flashing light woke Sarah up from her sleep. she looked around the room confused, she had somehow ended up in her bedroom and didn’t hear any noise in the house. she sat up as she heard helicopters fly over the house and car alarms go off. she quickly got up calling out for Joel as she walked around the house but she only found you in bed asleep, no sign of Joel.

she felt awful waking you up but she had no other choice. she crept to the side of your bed and shook you awake. “mum, can you wake up please?” you jumped awake when you felt her hand on your shoulder. “what’s the matter sweetheart?” you asked but your question was answered when another helicopter flew over the house. “what the hell?” you said sitting up quickly.

you grabbed your phone which was on the bedside table but there was no service. “what’s happening?” Sarah asked as you quickly got dressed out of your pyjamas. you were going to go outside and you didn’t want your neighbours, if they were awake, to see you in your pyjamas so you put on a tracksuit before walking downstairs. “i don’t know baby”

you turned on the tv and heard the broadcast ‘stay home, do not let anyone into your house. we will post more instructions soon’ you frowned, what the fuck was happening? you checked your phone again, this time trying to phone anyone, your mum, your dad, your brother, Joel and nothing. no calls were going through.

the two of you jumped at the sound of Mercy, the Adlers dog barking at your front door. Sarah quickly put on her shoes and went outside to retrieve the dog and you quickly followed, slipping on your trainers. “Sarah i don’t think we should go outside yet. we should wait for your dad” but she ignored you. she walked outside, bringing Mercy with her to take him back home making you follow after her as quick as you could.

“Sarah please come back inside” you said but the curious girl went inside the Adlers house after she heard a glass breaking. “no Sarah don’t go in there” you sighed, you loved that girl but she did not listen. Sarah was quiet walking into that house, making sure to not make any sudden movements as she did. the noise was coming from the kitchen and she quickly made her way there and almost screamed at the sight infront of her.

you were right behind her, you felt sick to your stomach as you saw Mrs Adlers mum chewing on her daughter’s neck with some sort of fungus growing out of her mouth. your eyes widened and your heart dropped, what the fuck was going on? the once disabled old woman looked up at the two of you and quickly stood up screeching and running after you when you told Sarah to run.

you weren’t as quick as you used to be but you were luckily quick enough the run away from this infected woman, she had fallen over the crinkled carpet giving you enough time to escape. “Sarah we need to get back in the house right now” you shouted as you grabbed her hand and tried to pull her into the house but as you did Joel’s truck pulled up.

“get in the truck right now” Joel shouted at you both, he sounded scared and he was never ever scared. this made you feel even more sick than before. he had a wrench in his hand and he quickly pulled the two of you behind him when the screeching sound approached you again. you all looked at the front door to see the elderly woman fall over the steps of her front porch.

Tommy got out of the car with a huge rifle in his hand making your eyes fill with tears, you were absolutely terrified but you didn’t want to show Sarah that you were scared, if she saw that she would feel even more frightened then she already was. you grabbed ahold of her hand and tried to pull her into the truck but she wouldn’t budge. it was like she was frozen in fear.

the old woman’s head shot up, her eyes were black and she started crawling towards you then she stood up and ran towards Joel and Tommy. “what are we doing Joel” without a second thought Joel cracked the wrench on her head making her fall to the floor. you and Sarah both gasped at what he had just done. Joel was never a violent person and this had shocked you.

he dropped the wrench and they both turned to look at you and Sarah. both of your faces were filled with fear and Joel quickly pulled Sarah into him “you killed her” she said, voice filled with fear “i know baby i’m sorry” he kissed her forehead and looked at you. you couldn’t believe what you just saw. you were confused and scared. “we gotta go” Tommy said making you all quickly get in the car.

you were sat in the back with Sarah who hugged you closely “it’s alright honey, it’ll all be over soon i promise” you whispered and you rubbed your hand up and down her arm, trying to comfort her but also trying to comfort yourself. you could feel the baby kicking vigorously “are you okay y/n? you aren’t hurt are you?” Joel asked as he looked back at the two of you. you just shook your head.

you didn’t know why but all this fear made you wish you were back to being a little kid, wishing that your mum was there to comfort you when you were scared yet now you were the adult comforting your child and you didn’t know if you would ever even see your mum again.

“dad-” Sarah said but Joel quickly cut her off “i don’t know” he said like he knew what she was going to ask him. “they’re saying it’s a virus, some kind of parasite” Tommy added making Joel look at him. “does it come from terrorists?” she asked making Joel repeat himself “we don’t know”

“are we sick?” she asked and this time you answered “no, none of us are sick” Joel nodded “of course not” he sounded mad but you didn’t know what at. “why were they blowing things up?” her eyes were filled with tears as she asked all these questions.

“no idea, there’s no phone, no radio” her eyes darted between Tommy and Joel “how do you know?” she asked, voice laced with concern “what?” Joel looked back at the two of you, cuddled up together with you trying to act your calmest but he knew you, you were freaking out.

“how do you know we aren’t sick?” she was practically crying now. “they’re saying it’s mostly people in the city, that’s why they have the highway blocked off” Tommy said but he was quickly silenced when he drove past a burning house of one of his friends.

“the Adlers would take nana to the city, so that’s why they were sick?” Joel nodded “your right, that’s probably why” his thick texan accent was filled with concern but he tried his best to stay calm. “we are going to be fine, trust me” Tommy said but he sounded unsure of what he had just said.

he drive around the corner and quickly slowed down when he saw a small family. “what are you doing?” Joel asked and Tommy just shook his head “they have a kid Joel” Joel quickly cut him off. “so do we, are you forgetting that my wife is pregnant?”

“Joel Tommy is right, they have a kid we should help them” he turned back to you “no, we don’t know them. keep driving Tommy” he’d never spoken this was before and this was definitely not the Joel you knew. you just prayed that whatever this is would go away and you could go back to your normal lives.

-♡-

you were driving through the town, planes flying low, catastrophe everywhere and you were just scared. “right keep going down this way” Joel said as Tommy drove down a side road leading to a whole group of people who were fighting and running away from the danger. “keep driving Tommy” Joel said even though there were people everywhere.

“are you kidding? Joel i can’t just drive through a whole group of people” Joel cut him off shouting “just keep going damn it” cars were crashing into each other, the sounds of people screaming made your eyes fill with tears. the next thing you knew the cinema doors cracked open with a lot more people coming out of it, all of them crying.

“shit” Tommy said as he quickly stoped the car “go go, fuck Tommy go get out of here” Joel said as he looked behind him out of the truck and slammed his hand on the dashboard “i’m going, i’m going” Tommy started reversing back, careful to not hit anyone in the process.

Sarah looked out the back window and so did you, seeing the huge airplane falling rapidly toward the floor. “Tommy, you need get out of here” you shouted as the plane darted toward you. “fuck Tommy go now” Joel shouted but it was too late, the huge plane crashed on the ground exploding into a million pieces.

the huge flame almost blinded you, you felt sickened at the thought of all those people on the plane that didn’t even stand a chance. “oh shit” you heard Sarah say as a huge chunk of the plane crashed into you car and then your whole world went black.

-♡-

“y/n” you felt someone’s hand on your shoulder as you awoke from the darkness “y/n honey we need to get you out, can you get out slowly for me angel?” Joel’s soft voice filled your mind as you sat up, a sharp shooting pain went right through your stomach making you groan. “my stomach is killing me” you said as you put a hand on your belly. you looked out the window and saw Sarah sitting on the floor and Joel crouching next to where you were sitting.

“don’t panic, it’s probably nothing okay?” Joel’s heart dropped when he heard you say that, a pain in your stomach was never a good sign especially when you are pregnant. “can you get out sweetheart? or do you need help?” you just nodded and started making your way out of the car.

once you had gotten out of the car you stood next to Sarah and saw Tommy was on the opposite side “we gotta get off of the street” he said as you stood up right, you right hand still back on your stomach hoping to feel any sign of movement. “Sarah can’t walk, i’ll have to carry her. do you think you can walk?” you nodded again. “shit” you heard Tommy shout as a police car crashed into Tommys now ruined truck.

the car set alight and you were lucky you even made it out of the car that quick before it crashed otherwise you would have been dead and you wouldn’t have wanted your family to see that. “Tommy” Joel shouted as he tried to see Tommys face through the flames. “i’m okay, head to the river and i’ll meet you there” with a simple nod Joel picked up Sarah and pushed you behind him.

“stay close okay?” he gave you a quick kiss before you both started making your way through the side roads trying to find a way to the river. the two of you stopped once you saw a group of bodies with people eating them. “what the fuck” you whispered as you saw this horrific sight in front of you. one of the people shot up, looking at you twitching weirdly.

“go” Joel pushed you in front of him and you both started running through a random cafe. the man chased you, snarling and screeching as he followed. you could hear the man tripping over different things but you didn’t dare look behind you. you could hear Joel comforting Sarah who was now crying as you finally made it outside but you didn’t stop running until a gunshot filled the silent field.

you and Joel both stopped, turning to look back and the now dead body in front of you. “don’t move” you heard someone say next to you as a bright light shone on the three of you. “my daughters hurt her ankle and my wife is pregnant” the man lowered his gun and started talking to his radio “i’ve got three civilians by the river, one of them injured, one pregnant”

you couldn’t make out what the other person was saying but your thoughts were cut short when Sarah spoke up “what about uncle Tommy?” she questioned Joel just shook his head “i’m gonna get you both safe first then i’ll go back for him okay?” she just nodded and you all looked back at the masked man. “yes sir….. yes sir”

he raised his gun “we are not sick” Joel said as the man approached the three of you. “sir, i said we are not sick” with that the masked man shot a round of bullets and Joel heard you and Sarah scream. you all rolled down a small ditch and Joel quickly turned to look at the man who was now approaching him with his gun raised. “i’m sorry” he said but before he could shoot Joel another shot was fired, killing him instantly.

he looked up to see Tommy with his gun raised, he had never been so happy to see his brother in his whole life. “are you okay?” Tommy asked Joel who was just grazed by a bullet and Joel just nodded but Tommys eyes shifted to you who was covered in blood and gasping for air. “oh god” he said making Joel turn around to look at you.

all you could do was feel a throbbing pain in you stomach. Joel quickly got up and ran to you and Tommy made sure Sarah was okay and turned her away from you. he knew Joel wouldn’t want her seeing you like this and it was bad enough he had to see you like this. “no no it’s okay” he could see the blood soaking through your jumper, the once grey colour was now a soaked dark red and it was growing by the second.

“you’re okay, move your hand honey” Joel said once you’d moved your hand, putting pressure on the wound. you cried in pain as you still gasped for air. “i know i know im so sorry sweetheart i am” he said and he pressed harder on the wound to stop it from bleeding out more. you managed to speak through your pain as you grabbed onto Joel’s arm “go” he shook his head.

“go Joel, take” you took a few more deep breaths as you tried to calm yourself down “take Sarah and go” he just shook his head again. “no, i’m not leaving you like this. i can get help and you’re gonna survive this” he said, his eyes filling with tears as he saw your tired but pained expression.

“you know how much i love you, i don’t” you closed your eyes as you breathed deeply again “i don’t want you seeing me like this” you stuttered out. you felt a tear roll down your cheek as you realised what was about to happen to you. “meeting you was the best thing to ever happen to me” you could hear Sarah sobbing next to Tommy and you hated that she was even watching you, laying there covered in blood.

“i’m sorry” he said as he sat down next to you, he took the pressure off of your wound and you were grateful he had given up, there was no way you were going to be able to survive this and you didn’t want to prolong it. you just shook your head at his comment. “don’t-”

you felt pain all over your body but you felt tired, so tired that you wanted to sleep desperately. “i love you, i love Sarah. just take her and run okay?” he had tears now rolling down his cheeks, his bloody hand now stroking your cheek softly. “im not leaving you here on your own” you just smiled at him. you knew he wouldn’t leave but you wanted to save him from the trauma of seeing you go.

“i know” you looked at him and he kissed you, one last for however long he has left on this earth. “i love you so much” you heard him say and with that your eyes closed. he sobbed quietly, you were gone and nothing was ever going to bring you back.

you were carrying his unborn child and he wished he could go back in time and taken the bullet instead of you. you were this ethereal soul who didn’t deserve to die this way and he hated it. he hated it so much. he tried his best to calm himself down as he took your wedding ring off of your finger and put it in his pocket hoping to keep it safe. it wasn’t like someone was going to steal it but he took it off so he could have something with him that was yours.

he kissed your forehead and carefully placed your body back on the floor and turned toward Sarah and Tommy, he had tear stains on his cheeks but his expression was neutral. “let’s go” he said, he was emotionless “dad, we can’t just leave her-” he cut Sarah off “i said let’s go” with that the three of them left and never looked back.

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honeyedmiller · 9 months

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Fate, After All | Joel Miller — Epilogue

warnings: pregnancy, childbirth, cursing, mentions of smut but not super explicitly detailed, tooth-rotting fluff, no-outbreak! Joel, no use of y/n. also, I’ve never personally given birth so I have no idea how the whole process works lol this has major inaccuracy so just go with it pls :’) this is very poorly written and not my best work at all but y’know, Joel with a baby is precious

word count: 1k+

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“Babe, what about this one?” You hold up a pink floral onesie to your protruding belly, looking up at Joel. You were at Target with him shopping for some last minute things before your daughter’s arrival.

It’d been a little over two years since you and Joel got married, and you found out you were pregnant eight months ago. You’ll never forget the look on Joel’s face when you showed him the multiple pregnancy tests you’d taken. You’d been feeling unwell for a few weeks prior to taking the tests, blaming it on stress from work. But then you missed your period, and you had an inkling that you might be pregnant.

Sure enough, you were right. You didn’t know who was more excited about it, though—Joel or Sarah. You were plenty excited and so ready to be a mom of two, but Sarah bawled her eyes out when she found out she was going to be a big sister and Joel would only talk about it for days on end.

You remember when you told your parents too, calling them up telling them that you and Joel could finally repay them for the honeymoon they’d so sweetly gifted you. Your mom cried tears of joy, and your dad got a little misty-eyed.

And when you and Joel found out the baby was going to be a girl? You both lost it. Joel loved being a girl dad so much, and he knew you’d been such a wonderful mother figure to Sarah, that you’d be the best mom to your little girl.

“I love it, darlin’.” Joel takes the onesie carefully from you, admiring how tiny it was. He’d completely forgotten how small newborns are.

You and Joel both thought for sure you were going to get pregnant on your honeymoon, with the way you two couldn’t keep your hands off of each other using every surface of your room possible to go at it. You had no idea your libido was so high. Neither did Joel.

Even now, with your hormones raging, you craved Joel so badly. He was terrified at first, not wanting to ‘hurt the baby’, but the nurses at the third ultrasound checkup told him it was completely okay—in fact, they encouraged it.

Joel was tender with you in bed (and in general) since you’ve been pregnant, and honestly, you thought it was so sweet. He wouldn’t let you lift a finger if he could help it, but you had to remind him that you had to do things for yourself, too. Though, you loved that he was so careful and gentle. He was before, but he’s a little bit moreso now.

Your focus shifted back to reality, Joel looking at you with a small smile.

“What?”

“You’re so beautiful, y’know that?” Joel asks as he steps to you, resting his hands on the sides of your tummy.

You huff a small laugh, shaking your head. “Sure don’t feel like it.”

“You’re glowing, sweetheart. You’re carryin’ our child and you look damn good doin’ it.” He leans down to kiss you gently.

“This baby has made you such a softie, Miller.” You tease, grasping the side of his face as he chuckles. The crow’s feet around his eyes showcase in fullness, displaying how truly happy he felt.

“What can I say? I love all three of my girls more than anything in the world.” He kisses your forehead, pulling back from you before picking up another pair of shoes that he shows you—big, soft, brown eyes on display for you.

A few weeks later, you’re sitting on the couch with Joel as you rest your eyes while he gave you a foot massage. You told him constantly that he didn’t need to do that, but he insisted on the sweet gesture. It was quiet in the house; it’d been that way since Sarah left for college. You and Joel were definitely lively people, but Sarah always kept the conversation going with her wittiness and smarts.

Recently, you’d been having Braxton Hicks, so pain would come and subside. You were due in only just a couple of days, so any time now your little one could choose her arrival. Your whole body was so sore and just the thought of even getting up to do something made you want to cry. You were extremely emotional even moreso now, and Joel was taking your moods graciously.

It wasn’t too late into the night, so when Joel’s phone rang, you knew it was Sarah. She’d do check-ins every couple of days to make sure you were okay, and just to say hi. She was planning on flying back to Texas the next day, so you were happy you got to see her soon.

“Hey babydoll.” Joel answered softly, probably thinking you were asleep by now.

“No, mom’s sleeping right now. Let her get some rest. I’ll call you immediately if anything happens or changes, okay?”

Your heart clenched in warmth at the fact that Sarah referred you to ‘mom’. She’d been doing that since you and Joel got back from your honeymoon, and you loved it every time. You truly don’t think you’ll get over it, probably ever. It meant a lot to you that she was comfortable with you and liked to call you that.

You shot your hand out to retrieve the phone from Joel, and he chuckled, handing it over.

“Hello?” You say, voice a little hoarse from not talking for awhile.

“Hey, mom! How are you?” Sarah’s cheerful voice rung through the other line, and you smiled softly.

“I’m hurting everywhere. Can’t wait to get your sister out.” You half-joke.

“I’m sorry you’re in pain. Tell dad to run you an epsom salt bath or something to relieve your pain.” The idea didn’t seem half bad, but the thought of getting up and moving seemed like hell.

“I think I’ve tortured your father enough the past nine months with mood swings and emotions.” You laugh, running your free hand over your hard belly. Joel shakes his head at you and cracked a smile, softly patting your shin.

“Tell him to suck it up. He’s not the one that has to push a whole human out of him.”

“I’m sure he’d love to hear that one.”

“I’ll tell him, don’t worry mom. Get some rest. I love you.”

You huff a laugh at her slight overprotectiveness. “I love you too baby girl, can’t wait to see you tomorrow. Have a safe flight, okay?”

“I will! Bye!” And the line went dead.

“I’d love to hear what?” Joel asks, cocking an eyebrow at you.

“I’ll let Sarah tell you that one.” You grin cheekily, handing his phone back to him. You were feeling really tired, so you groaned as you moved your legs off of Joel and sat up slowly.

“I’m gonna take me and this baby to bed. We’re tired.” You looked at Joel, who nodded.

“Let me join you.”

And that’s how the rest of the night went. Joel helped you upstairs, made sure you were comfy in bed, and got behind you to spoon you the rest of the night.

It wasn’t until around two in the morning that you felt a really bad contraction. You’d never had one this strong before, and when they kept coming at least fifteen minutes apart, you woke Joel.

“Joel.” You whispered, taking his hand that rested on your stomach to squeeze it. He didn’t wake at the first attempt, but another contraction washed over you, this time much more painful.

“Fuck. Joel.” You said louder, and this time, he groggily hummed.

“You okay sweetheart?” He sleepily said, and you gave his hand a squeeze.

“No. My contractions hurt really bad.” You say, and he sits up behind you.

“Do we need to go to the hospital?”

“I think so.”

Joel gets out of bed swiftly, putting on some sweats and a t-shirt before helping you sit up. You try to focus on your breathing, but the pain is really starting to bother you. He helps you dress into some biker shorts and an oversized t-shirt of his, grabbing your hospital bag before he helps you slip on your slippers with a grip at the bottom.

He leads you down the stairs ever so carefully, grabbing the keys and his wallet from the front table by the door before heading outside with you. He locked up as fast as he could and got you into his truck, helping you buckle in. Joel had completely forgotten about the rush and adrenaline that comes with having a baby. It’d been so long since he’s experienced it, so he was trying to keep it together as best as possible for your sake.

You closed your eyes as you rested your head on the back of the headrest, one hand gripping the door handle inside and the other one onto the seat.

Joel starts the truck up, throwing it into reverse before taking off down the road. Luckily there was barely any cars on the road at this hour, so you wouldn’t get stuck in any traffic.

Joel flipped open his phone and speed dialed Tommy, who picked up after the third ring.

“Hey, brother. What’s up?”

“Hey Tommy. We’re headed to the hospital now. Her contractions are pretty bad and not super far apart.” Joel explains, trying to drive to the hospital with urgency but also not break any laws.

“Oh, oh shit. Okay. Do you need me to do anything?”

“Uh, just– just pick Sarah up from the airport later today so you both can come to the hospital at the same time. I’ll call you if I need anything else. I gotta go.” Joel’s rushed words almost made his brother chuckle.

“You got it, brother. And Joel? Don’t worry. She’s got this, and so do you. Be the best support system you can be to her, yeah?”

“Yeah. Got it. I’ll call you when I can.”

“Bye.”

The line went dead as you both neared the hospital, and Joel luckily found parking near the front. He hopped out and jogged to the other side, opening your door to help you out of the truck. He grabbed the hospital bag and slung an arm around your lower back and around to the side of your tummy so you could lean yourself into him if you needed to. He locked the truck, walking at your pace up to the front doors.

The receptionist, who looked bored out of her mind, looked up beyond the glasses perched on the bridge of her nose.

“Um, my wife– she’s– her contractions are strong and not far apart.” Joel explains as you try to not think about the excruciating pain you’re feeling.

“Oh, honey, let’s get you checked in real quick and we’ll get you a wheelchair.” The receptionist asked Joel the few questions, because in all honesty, your mind was foggy and unfocused. You just wanted to lay down in a bed with some medicine that’ll make you feel better.

A nurse brought a wheelchair and took you up to the labor and delivery unit of the hospital, checking you into your room.

After you changed into the hospital gown, the nurses took some tests and checked how much you were dilated. You were too tired to even pay attention to what was going on around you, but one nurse tapped your shin softly.

“Hey mom, how’re you holdin’ up?” Her Southern drawl was strong, but she sounded sweet.

“‘M okay. In a bit of pain.” You mumbled, trying your best to look at her clearly.

“Well I have good news. You’re about five centimeters dilated, so you can get an epidural if you want one.”

“Please. This pain is nearly unbearable.” You chuckle nervously, and Joel grips your hand. You look up and him and smile as he leans down to give you a soft kiss.

“You’re doing amazing, mama.” He says, and you nearly melt into the bed. He was so damn sweet to you, even in the most challenging of situations.

“Alright, we’ll schedule you for one asap and get an anesthesiologist in here to give you one. Sound good?” She looks down at you, and you nod.

“Thank you.” You say before she exits the room, and it’s just you and Joel. Joel pulls up a chair beside the bed, taking your hand in his and kissing the back of it gently.

“Gotta call Sarah and my parents.” You murmur, eyes closing in exhaustion.

��Don’t worry sweetheart, I will right now.” Joel gave your hand a squeeze before you completely knocked out.

A few hours later, you woke up to see Sarah and your mom in the room. You’d been completely knocked out this entire time, except for when they gave you the epidural. Your surprise was evident to see them, and you smiled tiredly.

“You’re here.” You say, voice gravelly.

“Hey mom!” Sarah whispers, bending down to give you a hug and a kiss on the head.

“Hey kiddo. Where’s dad?”

“Went to get a cup of coffee with uncle Tommy in the cafeteria downstairs.” She smiles, and you nod. You look to your mom who had tears in her eyes, and you suddenly began to worry.

“Mom? What’s wrong?” Your voice is a bit panicked, and your heart rate on the monitor noticeably picked up.

“Oh nothing baby! Relax, relax,” She brushes your hair away from your face, cupping your cheek with her hand. “I’m just so happy for you. I’m happy you’re getting some rest.” She grins at you, and you nod.

“The epidural really knocked me out.” You chuckle, feeling a strong pressure in your pelvic area. You wince, shifting uncomfortably.

“Oh baby, that’s a contraction. Nurse said you’re about seven centimeters now.” She said, and your eyes widen. Before you could respond, there was a soft knock at the door as Joel and Tommy appeared.

“Hey sweetheart. How you feelin’?” Joel asks as he sets his cup of coffee down, kissing your forehead.

“Tired, but fine.” You weakly smile, and Tommy bends to give you a hug.

“You got this sis. Squeeze Joel’s hand as haaard as ya need to.” He winks at you, and you laugh.

“Well he is the one who got me like this after all.” You quirk an eyebrow, and Joel holds his hands up in defense.

“Hey hey hey, it takes two to tango darlin’.” He says.

“That it does.” Exhaustion was overwhelming you, and your eyes were starting to drift close without you even noticing.

“Let’s let her and Joel have some privacy. Let her get some rest.” Your mom suggested, leaving Sarah and Tommy to follow out of the room after her.

“Come cuddle with me.” You weakly reach out to Joel, and he huffs a laugh.

“Pretty sure ‘m not supposed to get on the bed with you, darlin’.”

“Who cares. I want my husband to hold me.” You pout, and he softly chuckles. You hear him take off his boots, carefully climbing into the small hospital bed with you. He wraps his arms around your shoulders as you nuzzle yourself into his chest, his scent and warmth surrounding you. You were out like a light again in no time.

It didn’t even feel like five minutes later to you when you’d been woken up by the nurse, but apparently it’d been a couple more hours.

“Hey hon. You’re almost fully dilated. We’re gonna need to prep you.” The nurse spoke softly, and you looked at Joel who was sitting in the chair next to your bed. His head rested on the side of the bed as he held your hand in his. You smiled softly at the sight before regretfully shaking him awake.

“Babe. Wake up.” You coo softly, and he opens his eyes. He looks at you wearily, trying to wake up fast.

“You okay?” He asks, rubbing his thumb on the back of your hand.

“Yeah. Nurse says I’m almost fully dilated so they have to prep me now.” You give his hand a squeeze, and he nods.

“You’ve got this, baby. I’m going to be right by your side through it all.”

And he was right. He was.

Once you were fully dilated, they had you starting to push, and god you’ve never felt a more soul crushing pain in your life. You were trying to steady your breathing, but it was getting harder for you to focus. Pain overtook your whole being and you started to sob.

“I can’t do this, I can’t do this.” You cried, shutting your eyes tightly.

“Yes you can, baby. You’re doing so good. So good. She’ll be here in no time.” Joel encouraged, clasping your hand as he kissed your temple repeatedly. He kept whispering sweet encouragements into your ear, being the supporting husband you knew he’d be. You just couldn’t fathom the pain you were going through.

“I can see the head, mama! Just a couple of more big pushes and she’ll be out.” The nurse was trying to talk you through it.

It’s like the next few pushes you completely blacked out—all you remember is the sound of your silent screams, a ‘there she is! I see her!’ from the nurse, and the sweet cry of your baby girl.

“She’s here, mama. You did it! Congratulations!” The nurse set her onto your bare skin, and you sobbed. You looked down at her, then up at Joel, who’d also happened to be crying. He gave you a kiss and rubbed the back of your head as he looked back down at his newest daughter.

The nurses took her to get her cleaned and weigh her before swaddling her and giving her back to you.

“She’s perfect.” You cry, knuckle running over her cheek as gently as possible.

“She is. You did it, sweetheart. I’m so proud of you. She’s here.” Joel cried, and you leaned in to him as he looked down at the both of you.

“So what’s her name?” The nurse asks, smiling at the three of you.

“Sophia Evelyn Miller.” Joel says, his chest swelling with pride. You gently handed him his tiny daughter, as she cooed softly in his strong arms. She was safe and sound, a silent promise Joel made to all three of you that he would love and protect his girls until the end of time.

You’d given Joel everything he ever wanted—a loving wife, a mother figure to his first daughter, a bigger family, and a house he could call a home with you and his girls in it. He doesn’t know how he got so lucky, but his heart was so full with love and pride. So much love for his three girls, and pride to call you his wife and Sarah and Sophia his daughters.

This was really the fate that the universe brought upon you two—

One you both will always cherish forever.

a/n: ahhh it’s finally done :’) sorry this epilogue wasn’t really all that great, I just wanted to give Joel the endgame with his new daughter and wife lol

hope u guys enjoyed this mini series <3 love u all forever. muah

#joel miller imagines #joel miller fic #joel miller series #joel miller fluff #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller imagine #joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x pregnant reader #joel miller x afab!reader #pedro pascal imagines #pedro pascal imagine

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joelsgreys · 3 months

Text

softness

Post Outbreak! Joel Miller x Female Reader

summary: Joel’s a little unsure of doing skin to skin with his newborn daughter.

warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, MINORS DNI. JACKSON ERA. established relationship. (TW) PREGNANCY. mentions of premature birth, minor descriptions of childbirth, mentions of birth weight, it is implied that reader is breastfeeding her baby, semi accurate medical journal research, girldad! Joel, mentions of scars (Joel), mentions of insecurities and anxieties, if i missed anything, please let me know! NO MENTION OF READER’S AGE. NO PHYSICAL DESCRIPTION OF READER. no physical description of child except for her hair color/type. very minimal editing.

word count: 3.5k

a/n: i had this outline sitting in my drafts and i decided to finally just write it out and post it. it ain’t much, but it’s honest work. it is part of the safe and sound universe.

She’d made her entrance into the world early.

About four or five weeks, the commune’s doctor thinks.

Without ultrasounds, it’d been a guessing game.

And a fucking terrifying guessing game at that.

For several months, all you could do was hope.

Hope for a smooth pregnancy.

Hope for a safe labor and delivery.

Hope for a strong, healthy baby.

When you went into labor earlier than the doctor had predicted you would, all of your hopes shattered, the pieces falling around you like shards of broken glass you couldn’t put back together even if you tried.

“No! No, it’s too soon! It’s too fucking soon!” you’d cried out, the sheer panic setting in and seeping into your bones as a warm, clear liquid dripped down the insides of your legs and pooled around your bare feet. You had been in the kitchen making Ellie breakfast and packing her lunch for school—one second you’re standing there in front of the food pantry debating with yourself on what vegetable to throw into the kid’s lunch bag with her sandwich and the next you’re calling out for help as an intense pressure nestled itself between your hips. It wasn’t until you heard a faint popping sound and then felt the gush of fluid between your thighs that you’d realized what was happening. An unmistakable first sign of labor, you’d experienced your water breaking. “This can’t be happening, it’s not time yet!”

Joel, who by some stroke of sheer stupid luck had the morning off from patrol duty, instructed Ellie to run upstairs and gather some clean clothes along with a pair of boots and the warmest coat you owned that still fit. November had brought along the first snowfall of the season—the frigid temperatures outside were anything but kind and the clinic was on the opposite side of the commune, a fifteen minute walk he wished you didn’t have to make in your condition. “I know this is real fuckin’ scary darlin’ but y’need to stay calm. I need you to stay as calm as possible. Y’think that you can do that for me, sweetheart?”

He’d been just as terrified, but he masked it well.

On the outside, he kept a calm, collected composure for your sake and for Ellie’s too, shoved aside his own fears so he could be the support you both needed, act as the glue that held yours and his little family unit together should anything were to happen. But on the inside, he was scared shitless, to say the least. He couldn’t be certain he would have the strength to hold himself together if something went wrong, if he lost you—or his unborn child.

Admittedly, it had taken him a few months to come to terms with the fact that he was going to be a father again at this stage in his life. The thought of him changing diapers at his age was one he couldn’t quite wrap his mind around—but the moment he felt that first little flutter of movement one night as you lay curled up against his side fast asleep, something shifted. That night, he had stayed wide awake, his large hand splayed over your belly in hopes he would feel that little flutter again.

“Joel, I’m really fucking scared. What if it’s too early—”

“Baby, look at me.” He reached up and gently took your chin, holding it between his thumb and index finger as he coaxed your gaze to meet his own. “S’gonna be okay,” he’d assured you, softly. “If this is happenin’ now, it’s because she’s ready, alright?”

For a split second, that panic had ceased.

“She?”

Confused, Joel’s brow furrowed. “Huh?”

“You just referred to the baby as a she, Joel.”

“I did?”

“Yeah—just now.” You’d stared at him with curiosity and took a step back, cradling your belly in both of your hands. “Do you think we’re having a girl?”

Sheepishly, he had shaken his head at you.

“No, I just—m’sorry. I ain’t all too sure why I said that.”

He truly, honestly hadn’t.

It’d slipped before he could even think about it.

But his accidental slip had been right.

After thirteen hours of grueling labor in Jackson’s small clinic, you’d given birth to a little girl, the sound of her loud wailing filling the whole room like a sweet melody eliciting a sob of joy from you and a shaky sigh of relief from Joel.

“Holy shit, she’s here! She’s actually fucking here,” Ellie breathed, her eyes going wide. Her arms were still wrapped around one of your legs—despite you warning the teenager about what she would see, it hadn’t stopped her from volunteering her assistance in the childbirth process. She watched on in a mix of both fascination and disgust as Dr. Porter, a woman in her sixties who served as Jackson’s sole physician, lifted the infant and immediately placed her onto your bare chest to clean her off. “This has gotta be the grossest, most amazing fucking thing I have ever fucking seen in my life.” Gently, she set your leg down onto the bed before walking around it to stand beside Joel. His hand was stroking your hair, his dark eyes trained on his crying newborn daughter. It was the perfect moment for Ellie to run her mouth and tease, “You’re not gonna cry, are you, Joel? I’d think you’re a lot fucking tougher than that, old man.”

“Shut up,” he’d muttered under his breath, putting an arm around her and pulling her against his side. He almost couldn’t believe this was now his life—a life he would have never even known if he hadn’t flinched twenty years ago when he had pulled the trigger.

Though she’d been born a few weeks prematurely, Rosemary Miller was deemed to be healthy—a tad underweight, but nothing to be worried about just yet, according to Jackie, the commune’s nurse. At about four pounds, eleven ounces, Rosemary was the tiniest thing you’d ever seen and somehow even tinier when Joel would cradle her in the palms of his large hands. Despite the fact that you’d been reassured that the baby’s low birth weight was nothing to be alarmed about, you and Joel had been advised it was best if you didn’t take her home until she gained a few more ounces and tipped the a scale at what the books state is a normal birth weight of five pounds, eight ounces.

“We just would feel better if she were here at the clinic where we can closely monitor her weight,” Jackie had said upon seeing the crestfallen look on your face. “Besides, you tore a little and you need time to heal as well, you know.”

Left with very little choice, you’d agreed to it.

“I’m losing it,” you say with an exasperated sigh as you stare up at the drab, gray ceiling. It’s been three days since you had given birth and all you want to do is take your daughter home. In an effort to lift your spirits, Maria had tried to warm the place up and make it feel more comfortable for you. She had swapped out the rough, scratchy bedsheet the clinic provided for you with a soft, knitted blanket she had made herself. She also took it upon herself to pack you a bag with your own clothes, a couple of books to read, and your favorite polaroids of Joel and Ellie. While it had been incredibly sweet of her to do for you, you still wanted out of that clinic sooner rather than later. “I miss our house. I miss our bed. I miss our kid.”

Joel, who’s sitting in an old, worn leather armchair tucked over in a corner of your room next to the frosted window, raises an eyebrow at you and then juts his chin towards Rosemary, who is swaddled up and sleeping soundly in the plastic bassinet beside your bed.

“Our kid’s right there, darlin’.”

You lift your head off your pillow and glare at him.

“I’m talking about Ellie, Joel.”

He chuckles and leans forward in his chair. Next to him sits a brown stuffed bunny rabbit—Ellie had traded a precious comic book for it and gifted it to the baby the same afternoon she was born.

“She’s been comin’ to visit every day after school.”

“It’s not the same,” you pout, shaking your head.

Joel sighs and glances at the cot that he had been sleeping on for the last few days—truth be told, he misses the house too. His back certainly misses the bed. “It ain’t the same,” he agrees, tiredly. His face is worn with exhaustion. Despite you insisting that he go home and get some proper rest, he’s too stubborn to listen and only leaves the clinic to take a shower and change his clothes—and to check on Ellie, who’s got a bad habit of not doing her homework unless you or Joel nag her to get it done. “M’real sorry, darlin’. But you heard what they said. Baby’s gotta gain a little more weight before we can take her home.”

Even from where he’s sitting, he can see your eyes glaze over with tears of frustration. Since the baby was born, you’ve been very sensitive, more so than when you’d been pregnant—something he didn’t think was even possible.

“If she keeps on eatin’ the way she’s eatin’ we’ll be home by the end of the week,” Joel adds in an effort to cheer you up. “Besides, you need to heal before we make that long walk across town and back to the house, sweetheart. S’not like I can just pull up the fuckin’ minivan and drive you girls home like back in the day, y’know?”

You wrinkle your nose at him. “Ew, Joel. We would not have a fucking minivan.” Dabbing at your eyes with the back of your hand, you can’t help but laugh at the thought of Joel Miller behind the wheel of one of those things. Then, you realize how endearing it would be to watch as he’s loading up Rosemary’s car seat into the van, the muscles of his broad back flexing underneath his shirt as he pulled on the straps to make sure it was safe and secure. You’d climb into the backseat with her and on the way home, you would ask Joel to swing through the nearest burger joint drive through because you’re fucking starving and in need of a proper meal after being subjected to boring, bland hospital food. You shoot him a small smile. “On second thought, that doesn’t sound all that bad. Maybe we would.”

Suddenly, there’s a light knock at the door.

“Come in,” you call, careful not to be too loud.

Dr. Porter walks into the room.

She had been a primary care physician prior to the world ending, according to Maria, who a couple of months ago had given birth to her son while under Dr. Porter’s care. Maria had assured you that, even though the woman never trained in obstetrics, she always went above and beyond for all the mothers to be in the commune. She dedicated her spare time to studying, lost herself in medical books she found on the shelves of the town’s library—kind of like the one that’s currently tucked underneath her arm.

“Hi there mama,” she greets, her eyes shining brightly behind her coke-bottle glasses. Wearing jeans and a sweater, she doesn’t quite look the part—maybe she’d worn a white coat once in her life, but now it was only the old, silver metal stethoscope she had draped around her neck that gave her profession away. “How are you feeling this morning?”

“I’m okay,” you say with a shrug. “Can’t complain.”

Over in his corner, Joel can’t help but snort.

Ignoring him, you add, “Bleeding’s slowing down.”

“Good, that’s good,” Dr. Porter tells you. “And how about this sweet little girl?” She smiles and makes her way over to the bassinet, keeping her voice low. “She eating well?”

“She is. Her last feed was about two hours ago.”

“How’s she sleeping?”

“Like a rock.”

“And you’ve been doing skin to skin as well?”

You nod. “Yes, before and after her feedings.”

“That’s perfect.” Dr. Porter beams at you with pride. “Keep it up and do it as often as possible. There are a ton of benefits of doing skin to skin with her. It’s one of the most incredible things that a mother can do for her baby. Actually—” She pauses for a moment and pulls the book out from under her arm. “I have been doing a bit of research and as it turns out, there are also benefits if dad does skin to skin with baby as well.”

Joel stiffens slightly in his chair. “S’cuse me?”

“I found this book in the library. It talks about all of the benefits of fathers doing skin to skin with their newborn. It was written some time in the nineties and studies were still being conducted, but I really believe they were onto something.” She hands you the book. “For being preterm, Rosemary’s healthy, but it doesn’t do any harm to try whatever you can to make sure that she builds up that immune system and stays healthy, especially now that winter’s here.” Flashing you a smile, she informs you, “I went ahead and folded the pages for you and made some notes. There’s a few benefits in it for Joel as well. Could be worth a try.”

After telling you she’ll be back in a couple hours to check on you and to weigh the baby, Dr. Porter excuses herself from your room, quietly closing the door behind her.

Curiously, you open the book to the first page that she’d folded for you and start reading the first passage out loud.

“Ongoing studies have found skin to skin between father and child have similar benefits to those that come from skin to skin between mother and child. It regulates the baby's body temperature, blood sugar, and stress levels.” You pause and look over at Joel, who appears thoroughly unimpressed. “It also helps to regulate the baby’s heart rate and breathing rate. Joel, this is incredible! I think you should—”

“No.”

Joel winces. He doesn’t mean to sound so curt.

Your face falls. “Why not?”

“That’s for mothers,” he grumbles. “Y’know, for feedin’ the baby.”

“It’s for much more than just that.” You shake your head and flip over to the next page, scanning both the text as well as Dr. Porter’s notes. “It says here that it also helps the baby pick up their father’s natural scent and promotes bonding.”

“Sweetheart, I can bond with her just fine with my fuckin’ shirt on, there ain’t no need for me to—what in the world are you doin’?” Perturbed, Joel watches you as you take a handful of your blanket, throwing it off yourself. He jumps up to his feet the second he realizes that you’re about to get out of bed. “Don’t—”

“Oh relax, Joel. I should be moving more anyway,” you say, wincing as you sit up and swing both legs over the side of the bed. It isn’t so much pain as it is discomfort—everything had been shoved up and out of place for months, after all. As soon as you stand, Joel’s there at your side, one hand on your arm and the other on your back, trying to guide you back onto the bed. You lightly swat him away with your hand. “Joel, stop fussing over me! I’m fine!”

“Baby, y’need to lie down right now—”

“Take off your shirt.”

His hands fall away from you and his eyes widen.

“What?”

“Take off your shirt and go sit down in the chair.”

The blood drains from his face and he pales.

It’s not that Joel doesn’t want to do it. He does.

He’ll do anything if it’s for his daughter’s benefit.

Still.

The idea of laying his innocent little baby girl on him without his shirt on—it’s uncomfortable. His chest and stomach are littered with several scars. Rough, raised patches of skin that serve as reminders of a brutal past he doesn’t want her finding out about, not for as long as he can fucking help it.

Rosemary deserves to be wrapped up in softness.

The softness of your smooth, blemish free skin.

The softness of the blankets you’d knitted for her.

The softness of the stuffed bunny Ellie had given her.

Joel?

He isn’t soft.

Nothing about him is soft.

Even holding her in his hands for the first time had been something of a battle. Hands that once snapped necks and slit throats didn’t deserve to hold something so pure and innocent.

“This sounds really promising, Joel.” Slowly, you make your way over to the plastic bassinet, ignoring the dull ache between your thighs. With your back to him, you carefully begin to unswaddle the baby. You try not to wake her as you peel off her warm, knitted onesie and matching socks, leaving her in nothing but her teeny, tiny cloth diaper. Gingerly, you pick her up and turn around to face him. “If Dr. Porter thinks we should try it, then it’s for a good reason, don’t you think so?”

Joel swallows harshly.

“What is it?”

“S’just that I—I’ve got scars everywhere, y’know?”

Your expression instantly softens for him. “Joel, you’re her daddy,” you remind him, gently. “She’s not going to care about things like that.” Pausing, it suddenly occurs to you that it’s not just about his scars. It’s about something else, something that runs so much deeper for Joel. He’d done what he had done in order to survive, but that doesn’t mean he didn’t live with the shame—the guilt and the regret. Rosemary begins to fuss awake and you lightly bounce her in your arms as you assure him, “She isn’t going to care about your past or what you’ve done. Her love for you is going to be as unconditional as yours is for her. She’s going to love you no matter what, Joel. I can promise you that.”

His jaw clenches and his lips press into a tight line.

Rosemary starts to cry—she’s cold, no doubt.

The old heater in the clinic hardly runs.

And when it does, it breaks down.

“Joel, please,” you beg over her wails. “Just try it? For me? For her?”

Sighing in defeat, Joel shrugs out of his jacket and he tosses it aside. With trembling fingers, he begins to unbutton his green flannel shirt—his long sleeved thermal henley comes off next and then he takes off the cotton t-shirt he wears underneath for an added layer of warmth during the winter season. As he stands there shirtless, he shivers and his flesh erupts with goosebumps. “Wait,” he mutters as he watches you take a step forward. He drags the armchair away from the window. He then sits down, his heart racing and the anxiety flaring as he gives you a subtle nod of his head. “Okay.”

You walk over to him and place her on his bare chest.

The second he feels Rosie’s soft skin on his, there’s a shift.

It’s similar to the one he felt when he first felt her move in your belly.

He calms and his heart slows—his nerves dissipate.

And Rosemary stops crying.

She scrunches, curls up on his chest, and yawns.

Grimacing, you lean over and pick up his flannel shirt. “Here,” you say, draping it over them as a makeshift blanket. “How’s that feel?”

“Think she likes it, darlin’,” Joel murmurs, his fingers delicately brushing over her soft tufts of dark brown hair. His touch causes the newborn’s lip to curl and he catches a glimpse of the prominent dimple in her left cheek—the same dimple Sarah had inherited from him, Rosemary had inherited too. There’s a dull ache in his chest, but somehow, he still smiles as she peers up at him with sleepy eyes. “Hi, Rosie Posie. S’me, babygirl. Your daddy.”

Rolling your lip between your teeth, you stifle a giggle.

“What?” he asks, arching an eyebrow at you.

“She’s not the only one who seems to like it.”

Joel chuckles, admitting, “S’pretty relaxin’.” He presses his nose into his daughter’s curls and inhales deeply, relishing in the warm, sweet milky scent of her. After a minute, his smile falters slightly. “Baby?”

“Yeah?”

“Do you really believe it?”

Your brow furrows. “Believe what?”

“That she’s gonna love me no matter what.”

“Of course I do.”

“How can you be so sure ‘bout it?”

Carefully, you perch yourself on the arm of the chair and press a gentle kiss against his right temple, your lips brushing over his scar. “Because I just am, Joel.”

Somehow, he believes it—he believes you.

Joel tilts his head back, puckering his lips.

Grinning, you give him a chaste kiss before standing. “I’m going to see if I can get a nap in before her next feed,” you tell him, padding back over to the bed. “Do you think you’ll be okay with her for a while, just the two of you?”

“I think we’ll be just fine,” he murmurs, gingerly stroking Rosemary’s silky cheek with his finger. “Yeah. We’ll be just fine, won’t we, babygirl?”

divider credit to @saradika-graphics 🤎

#joel miller x reader #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x you #joel miller fluff #joel miller x pregnant reader #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller drabble #joel miller one shot #joel miller fic #the last of us fanfiction #tw pregnancy #tw childbirth #tw premature birth

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and-claudia · 4 months

Text

Against All Odds pt. 8 (Joel Miller x fem! reader)

General Warnings for later on: The main story will have an age gap between Joel and the reader (Reader will be 25 once we get to the main storyline), this will also be your warning that it will eventually be an x pregnant reader (if that’s not your jam, I’m sorry) there is also going to be more graphic/trigger parts later on so please always to be sure to read the warnings BEFORE reading. This story will also be 18+ and TO BE ON THE TAGLIST YOU CAN NOT BE AN AGELESS BLOG (i do actually check that) also there first hand full of parts are all prologue so Joel won’t actually be in it for a bit

Warnings for this part: guns, killing, cannon violence

Word count: 3400+

Taglist Sign-Up (read my rules carefully before filling it out)

gif not mine

As the truck went through the window I instinctively reached my hand out to brace myself for the impact. Pain radiated from my wrist all the way up my arm and my head jerked forward as we hit something heavy enough to stop the momentum of the truck.

“Everyone okay?” Joel yelled.

“Yeah.” Ellied said, she didn’t sound like she was in pain, which was good.

“Sure.” I said through gritted teeth.

I knew I messed up my wrist somehow, I just wasn’t in a position to assess if it was a sprain, fracture, or just plain broken, and I definitely had whiplash in my neck.

“Ellie, you’re not hurt or nothin’?” Joel asked.

“No, I don’t think so, you and Yn okay?”

“I’m fine.” Joel confirmed.

“My wrist. Worry about it later though.”

No sooner did the words leave my mouth than the bullets started being fired at the truck. Instinctively we all ducked down.

“Belts off. Fast!” Joel yelled.

I did as he said, and opened my door that was opposite of the window we crashed through. Before I slid out though, I managed to grab the bag that was at my feet and take it with me. Ellie got out from the back seat and Joel slid out behind me. We all sat bunched up together, using the truck as a shield. After a moment or two, Joel carefully maneuvered to get the rifle out of the truck to have some form of defense against the ones shooting at us.

“Give us your shit, you make it through this! I promise!” I heard one of them yell, but I knew it was a trap. They would take our supplies and kill us.

"Joel... the hole she can fit through it." I said nodding towards a hole in the wall. He nodded.

“Ellie, you see it? When I say go, you crawl to that wall, you climb through and you don’t come out until one of us says, okay?” Joel said to her, I could tell she was scared.

“Ellie, they won’t hit you, okay? They won’t.” I tried to reassure her.

“Just stay down, stay quiet.” Joel added.

“Mhm.” The girl nodded but I could tell she was still scared.

“Ready?” Joel looked at me, and I got my gun ready, despite the shooting pain in my wrist and nodded.

“Go!” Joel yelled and we both stood up, him at the bed and me at the hood, and began firing back at them. Ellie began making her way to the hole.

I wanted to steal a look at her but couldn’t. I just continued shooting. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw one of Joel’s shots hit one of the men and he went down. I took that chance to duck back down behind the truck.

“You motherfucker!” The other man yelled, he pissed.

I made eye contact with Joel. There was debris further back that would offer bed coverage. He slightly communicated to me to go behind it. I nodded and stayed low as I moved to it. We stayed there silently, the only sound coming from the man as he got closer. Just as he rounded the corner, before he even got a chance to reach for his own trigger, Joel had already pulled his. I sighed in relief.

The calm only lasted for a second though because the next thing I knew, the back door to the building was swinging open and another man came in his weapon raised. He hadn’t seen me, only Joel. The two of them were now fighting up close and I couldn’t get a clear shot. Eventually, the man had Joel pinned to the ground. This was my shot I raised my gun and pulled the trigger. Nothing. Fuck. I was out of ammo. Joel was fighting against the rifle laying across his windpipe, legs kicking trying to force the man off of him. I tried to hurry to get the magazine out of my gun to reload it as fast as I could, but my hands were shaking. Then I heard a gun fire, causing me to jump. When I looked up from the gun, I saw Joel laying there breathing heavily, and the man dead beside him. I looked around for who had shot him and saw that Ellie had crawled back through and shot him.

Joel slowly got up and gave Ellie a look. She handed the gun to him and turned around to go back behind the wall. He put the safety on and turned to me.

“I’m sorry.” I shook my head and tried not to let the tears fall, “I- I thought I was counting how- how many rounds I had shot… I must have messed up… I thought there were two- two more.”

“It’s okay, it happens.” He tried to reassure me.

I shook my head, “If you die, I can’t get here there alone… I can’t do any of this alone, Joel… please.” The floodgates broke.

He was in front of me in an instant, wrapping me up in his arms.

“Sh, it’s okay, Yn. It’s okay… we gotta get out of site, okay.” I nodded weakly, “Come on.”

He led me over to the wall, “Ellie, look for another way in!”

“There’s a door but stuff is against it. I can try to move it.” She said.

Soon we were all in the small room together. We rebarricaded the door and took a few minutes to regroup and figure out what supplies we had left. Between our two bags, we each had some food, Joel’s light, a few extra pairs of clothes, and ammunition. My wrist was definitely sprained pretty good, but I would just deal with that later.

“Now what?” Ellie asked.

“We go up. Hopefully, we can spot a clear route out.” Joel said.

Joel led the way out of the building and down the alleyway behind it. We could hear cars driving down roads nearby, calling out for who I can only assume was one of the men we just killed. We made it to another building and slipped inside, unseen. We continued making our way from building to building, trying to get to the taller ones. It was slow moving but eventually, it became even slower. We had company. Men with armor on, carrying rifles, and handheld battering rams were going from door to door, looking for someone.

“They’re not FEDRA, and they’re not Fireflies, so who are they?” Ellie asked.

“People.” Joel replied from where he stood, peeking out between two pieces of paper covering the window.

“Are we going to be okay staying here, Joel?” I asked.

“For a bit, at least. Looks like they’re checkin’ out apartment buildings first… But they’ll eventually start going through these places too. Take a look, Yn, see that tall one, about four blocks down?” Joel asked, stepping away to allow me to look.

“Yeah, that where we’re heading?” I asked.

“Once we don’t hear a truck, we move.” He confirmed.

We all took a seat to wait for the coast to be clear and make our break for the building.

“You okay, Ellie?” I asked.

Shooting someone is traumatic, and I wanted to make sure she was okay.

“Yup. Wasn’t my first time.” She said. Her tone was short and she clearly not wanting to talk about it yet.

I nodded and let her be.

“Are you okay, let me see your wrist.” Joel said, holding his hand out for me to place my hand in.

I did and winced as my wrist touched his hand. He took a couple of seconds to examine it.

“Can you move it?”

I did the best I could which was hardly anything. But a little movement was good, it wasn’t broken and hopefully, the sprain wasn’t completely torn ligament bad.

“We gotta wrap it.” Joel said.

“It’s fine.” I insisted, but Joel gave me that look.

“You would make me do the same. Ellie, she was stuff to wrap injuries in her bag, hand it to me.” He said.

She did as he asked and soon my wrist was all wrapped up, preventing me from really using it.

“This means I can’t shoot…” I said.

“It’ll be okay.” Joel said, trying to get me not to worry.

“Would now be a bad time to ask if I can have the gun back?” Ellie asked.

Joel looked to me for my input. While she was still pretty young, with the proper knowledge it would be beneficial for her to have her own weapon just in case.

“I mean, in the long run, it’s better to show her now rather than later.” I said and Joel nodded, knowing what I was true.

He pulled the gun out and emptied the chamber, making sure nothing was left in it so it wouldn’t accidentally get shot out and either hurt someone or give our hiding spot away. Then he moved over to where Ellie was to show her how to use it properly. I moved to sit next to them to listen and give any input I could as well.

“Show me your grip.” He said, handing her the gun.

“Take your finger off the trigger.” I said.

We were both surprised that she actually had a pretty decent grip on the gun. There was definitely room for improvement but she at least didn’t have a limp grip on it.

“Now who taught you that?” Joel asked.

“FEDRA school.” “Figures.” Joel said shaking his head slightly.

Then he grabbed her other hand and brought it up to hold the gun as well, “Thumb over thumb, left and squeezes the right.” He explained as he guided her hands on where to go.

“You got a good grip on it now?” I asked, “You sure?” I asked again before reaching over and trying to jerk it out of her grip.

She held it just fine to which Joel and I nodded.

“That’s why you hold it with two hands and not one. Makes it harder for someone to rip it out of your hands.” Joel explained.

Joel collected the magazine off the floor and held his hand out for Ellie to give him the gun back. She did and he reloaded it for her before handing it back. She tested the new weight of it in her hands before nodding and going to put it in the back of her jeans.

“Uh-uh. You put it in your pack.” Joel said.

“Why? You and YN carry it like this.” She said.

“We’re adults. Plus, you’d probably shoot your damn ass off.” Joel said, causing me and Ellie to laugh a little.

“That can’t happen!” Ellie said.

“Oh, but it can. I knew a guy, shot his ass off.” I said causing both of them to look at me funny.

“Yup, when I lived in Alabama, after the breakout.” At this point Joel was looking at me funny, knowing I had never lived in Alabama.

“His name was Forest, Forest Gump. He was friends with brother…” I explained.

“Damn, that must suck! How did he take a shit?” Ellie asked, clearly believing the story.

“I mean, keep your gun back there, you’ll find out for yourself.” I said and that seemed to convince her to put it in her pack instead.

At this point, Joel had stood up and was checking outside.

“It’s clear. We need to move.” He said, already moving to the door to pull the barricades off of it.

Ellie and I both stood up and grabbed our stuff. We turned to Joel just before he opened the door. He hesitated and looked over at us.

“We’ll get through this.” He said and we both nodded.

We slipped out of the building and began making our way towards the taller ones. It was slow going. We constantly had to find cover from being spotted by anyone. The sun eventually began to set and we were finally at the taller ones. Which was great because I was getting tired of running from building to building. Joel hoisted Ellie up so she could break into the building through a vent and then let us in. We waited outside for her.

“Where would you be without me?” She said, triumphantly as she opened the door.

“By now, Wyoming.” Joel said.

“Probably still in Boston.” I said, teasingly as I walked in.

“Oh, yeah. Walked right into that one.” Ellie said, shutting the door behind us.

We looked around the area we were in. It looked like a garage for whatever building we were at. “Okay, let’s make our way up. Rest. Come morning, I’ll take a look, find us a way out of the city.” Joel said, leading the way now.

As we passed the doorway to the stairs Ellie and I both saw how many floors there were.

“We’re not really going up all 47 floors, right?” Ellie asked.

My feet hurt even just hearing that number.

“Forty-five, actually. Or as far as I can make it.” Joel said.

“What about as far as I can make it?” I asked.

“I’m older.” Joel shot back, teasing me.

“I’m pregnant-er.” I said as we began climbing the stairs.

“That’s not even a word.”

“But its true… I’m like what, 12… 13 weeks probably… I can’t remember honestly.” I said the last bit to myself.

“That sounds about right.” Joel said, shocking me a little. I had no idea he was keeping track of any of that.

The climb went silent, until about the 20th floor when I could hear all of us breathing a little harder.

“Hey,” Ellie’s voice finally broke the silence, “When that guy was hurt, how did you know it was an ambush?”

Joel stopped and leaned on the railing for support, “I’ve been on both sides,” he began, “It was a long time ago. We did what we needed to survive.”

“You and Yn?”

“No, not Yn. Before Boston.”

“So you and Tess?” She pressed.

“And the others we were with. Including my brother.” He said.

There were a few moments of silence before Ellie asked another question, “Did you kill innocent people?”

I already knew the answer. Joel avoided the question and just told us to come on as he began climbing again.

Finally, Joel decided we were high enough. My feet hurt. I could barely breathe. We got off the stairs and went into the halls to find a room.

“Holy shit.” Ellie said.

“Yeah.” I agreed.

“Thirty-Three floors. That’s good. That’s high enough.” Joel said.

“It better fucking be.” I said, leaning against the wall, trying to catch my breath.

Joel had taken a seat against the wall beside to do the same thing. He didn’t get to sit for long though because Ellie was already pushing for him to get back up.

“Come on, lazy ass.” She said causing me to laugh as she pulled him up to stand.

“Lazy ass,” Joel repeated under his breath with a grunt, “I’m lazy, I am fifty-six years old you piece of shit.” He said back making us both laugh.

We finally found somewhere to stay for the light. Joel busted through the glass on the door to get us in. Once we were in, Ellie and I found some cushions from the couches to use as mats to sleep on. Unlike last time, this time I decided to put mine and Joel's side my side.

“Y’all better not do anything gross. I’m literally 6 feet away.” Ellie said upon seeing the setup.

“Trust me, we won’t.” I said.

Before she could say anything else, Joel began making all sorts of noise with broken glass. I looked over and he was dumping it all on the ground by the door. Ellie called his name a few times to get his attention but it wasn’t working until she pretty much yelled his name.

“What?” he asked, confused as to why she just yelled.

“What are you doing?” She asked.

“I don’t want someone sneakin’ up on us while we’re sleepin’.” He said.

Ellie nodded, “Ohh, I get it. Crunch, crunch, crunch.” She said as Joel walked over to the make shift mats, “Are you sure you’re gonna hear it?”

I had to stop myself from laughing.

“Of course, I’ll hear it. That’s the damn point.” He said, missing the old man joke completely.

“Okay,” Ellie held her hands up in surrender, “Well, good night, then. Oh, and I already told her but I’ll tell you, no nasty stuff better be going on over on your mats.” She said.

Joel looked over to where I was sitting and saw how I had put ours out. I couldn’t read his emotions in the darkness of the room and it made me panic that I may have stepped over the line. Joel ignored her and came over to me.

“If this isn’t okay and you’d rather sleep alone I can move mine away. I just wasn’t sure if-” I began to ramble.

“It’s fine. Promise.” He said, setting down his stuff beside his side, which also just happened to be the side he always slept on with me.

“Want some help with your boots?” He offered.

I was very capable of doing them, but nodded nonetheless. He slipped them off and I was appalled at how swollen they were already.

“Dude! That’s gross!” Ellie said, from where she was now lying on her side, watching us.

“Well, this is the shit that I am assuming happens when you are pregnant and climb over thirty flights of stairs. I will not be retesting this assumption though.” I said.

“Remind me to never have a kid. That looks painfull.” She said, before rolling back over.

“Do they hurt?” Joel asked softly.

I shook my head, “Not really, a little sore but tolerable.” I said, truthfully.

“What about your wrist? How is that doing?”

“It’s fine. We can look at it in the morning better.” I said before yawing.

Joel nodded and settled down on his side as I did the same. We all lay in silence for a bit before Joel’s voice broke through it.

“Hey, Ellie.” “Yea?”

“When we were talkin’ about hurtin’ people earlier, what did you mean it wasn’t your first time?” Joel asked cautiously.

I could hear Ellie shift around before she spoke, “I don’t wanna talk about it.” Jole turned his back to me to look over at her, “You don’t have to… I’m just sayin, it isn’t fair, at your age… having to deal with that.” He said, trying to comfort her in his own way.

“So, it gets easier when you’re older?” She asked, clearly trying to joke to brighten the mood that had settled around them.

“No, not really.” Joel said, shaking his head slightly.

“I asked about you hearing the glass earlier because I noticed you don’t hear too well on your right side. Is that from where you got shot?” Ellie asked, changing the subject.

“Probably more from shootin’,” He said, truthfully, “So if you wanna keep your hearing, stick to that knife.” He said before rolling back over.

There were a few more moments of silence and I thought they were both drifting to sleep like I was but of course, Ellie spoke up one last time.

“Hey Joel, did you know diarrhea is hereditary?” She asked, and I could already tell where this was going.

“What?” Joel asked confused by the random question.

“Yeah… it runs in your jeans.” She said.

I could feel Joel behind me, looking back at her over his shoulder. I was failing to contain my small laughter. Ellie also laughed some. Joel rolled back over, draping one of his arms over me as I continued to snicker a little.

“Jesus.” Joel said and I could hear the small smile in his tone.

“That is so damn stupid.” He said, trying not to laugh.

“You laughed, motherfucker.” Ellie said.

“I didn’t laugh.” “You’re trying not to!” I chimed in.

“Guess I’m losing it, then.” He said.

“Big time, dude.” Ellie said, still laughing.

Finally, Joel broke and all three of us were laughing. Once we all eventually calmed down, we said our goodnights and went to sleep.

I wasn’t sure how long I was asleep but at some point, my eyes snapped open to the sound of glass crunch under someone’s shoe.

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#joel miller x reader #joel miller x pregnant reader #joel miller #joel the last of us #hbo the last of us #hbo tlou #the last of us hbo #the last of us #joel miller tlou

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babydin · 1 year

Text

Love in the Middle of a Firefight - PART TWO

The pregnancy is easy, despite the circumstances. The pregnancy was the easy part, Joel was supportive, he helped out, he ran around like a Retriever whenever you asked him to and Ellie asked a million questions every single day. But when the baby arrives Joel doesn't know if he remembers how to love something so fragile. - Joel Miller x f!reader - 18+, minors DNI! - (2/?) - Joel is dad, Joel is Daddy, paternal postnatal depression, pregnancy sex, oral. Not necessarily in this chapter, but for sure in this series!! Trauma references. Domesticated af. Angsty in places! - 1193 words - Comments/likes appreciated. Requests are open! - A/N: I didn't think too hard about the timeline, just vaguely after the events of S1, they go to Jackson to Tommy's place and live there and nothing bad happens. This will be in multiple parts but I haven't planned for how many! There will be time-jumps in each of the parts because I'm impatient™️

Ellie looked blankly between the two of you. She had that look like she was waiting for the punchline of one of Joel’s shitty dad jokes.

PART ONE

“We’re home!”

Joel and Ellie walked home from school every day. He always took her to school, and he always picked her up. Walking was just their thing. You had been anxiously waiting for Joel to announce their arrival because he had promised he wouldn’t say anything to her until you were all together, you wondered if he had kept up that bargain. “How was school?” You ask, watching Ellie hang up her jacket and then walk into the living room to flop onto the couch. “Some kid pushed another kid into a garbage can and a fight broke out.” Ellie explained, her lips pursing slightly and her brows raising. Joel frowned a little and you asked “Were you either of the kids in that story?” “I was not.”

You took Joel’s hand and sat down with him on the coffee table in front of the couch. “Babygirl,” he said, “we have somethin’ we need to tell you. Somethin’ important.” Ellie’s eyes darted between the two of you as she tried to figure out what was going on before either of you said anything, “I’m not leaving. Fuck off, Joel. I’m not going anywhere. I like it here, I have friends!” Ellie had fallen into the habit of calling him Dad, unless she was furious with him then he was always Joel.

Joel reached out with both his hands and took hers, looking at her in a way that almost forced her to keep eye contact with him, “We ain’t goin’ nowhere. We’re safe here, okay? We don’t leave.” He sits up a little and you look between the two of them, they are thick as thieves, they talk without words and there is so much that remains unspoken between them but they know. “Are you getting divorced?” Ellie asked, her chin dropping down into her chest and her eyes looking from you to Joel and back again rapidly. You open your mouth to correct her but decide against it. You and Joel weren’t married, not by any technicalities anyway; you talked about it once, it was always in passing, until one day you set a date with a priest and a chapel but the priest died and there wasn’t anyone else ordained to perform a wedding. That night Joel cooked chicken wings on a barbecue in the yard, you drank beer and sat and cuddled under the stars. You shared your vows, you exchanged rings that you had both made from scraps of metal from the junkyard. Joel had helped you with yours, he was so clever with tools, the ring he gave you was perfect and looked as if it could’ve come from a store; he scratched coordinates inside the band from the spot you had shared your first kiss - they could’ve been coordinates to a burnt out Wendy’s and you’d have been none the wiser, the thought was painfully romantic and you cried when he told you. Yours was a little jankier, but he didn’t mind that, he said it suited him. From that night on he always called you ‘the Missus’. You supposed in a broken world that was about as official as it was going to get. “How would you feel about bein’ a big sister?” Joel’s voice had softened slightly as he presented the question to Ellie. He didn’t know how she would react, she’d grown up in this pandemic, she navigated the world so much differently because of the situations she had been forced into and now they were safe in Jackson, Joel only wanted her to be a kid, catch up on the years she had missed. Ellie looked blankly between the two of you. She had that look like she was waiting for the punchline of one of Joel’s shitty dad jokes. “I’m pregnant.” the words leave your mouth so abruptly that it even catches you off guard, and it’s the first time you’ve said it out loud. Suddenly it all feels real. The man you were playing house with by your side, the orphan you’d both somehow adopted as your own, in the middle of a war, your found family was about to grow by one more. Ellie giggled in her child-like way and fell back into the couch in a way that made Joel sit up defensively. “It’s difficult for me to believe that someone willingly reproduced with you.” Ellie teased. It’s clear that she thinks her leg is being pulled. “It was an accident, but you don’t need to be a dick about it.” You swatted Joel’s thigh, “Joel!” He turned to face you with an expression that was full of apologies “Obviously I didn’t mean it like that.” Ellie sat up again and leaned forward, her eyes narrowing a little as she looked at you with a calculated gaze, “Are you serious? Are you pregnant? For real?” Your eyes find hers, and your hands reach out to wrap around her own as you nod earnestly, hoping the message gets through. Joel reaches into the breast pocket of his shirt to show her the print out from the ultrasound, he points to the blip inside the hollows of your uterus and makes a sound that might’ve been him saying ‘there’ if he had opened his lips a little more. Ellie’s expression changes. You remember again that she’s experiencing a lot of things for the first time and this is the first ultrasound she’s seen, this is the first pregnancy she’s been this close to. “That’s a baby?” she asked, sounding utterly enchanted by it, unable to take her eyes off of it. “It’s so little.” “The nurse reckoned I’m about 7 weeks along,” you explain, “so in another 30 or so weeks it’ll be fully cooked.” “That’s a long time.” Ellie looked back at you, she sounded disappointed at the idea of having to wait so long to earn her role of big sister. “Trust me,” Joel added, “it’ll fly by.” Ellie’s eyes drifted back to the ultrasound, and Joel pushed it a little closer to her. She pulled her hands from yours and took the photo, bringing it up to her face for a closer inspection, “That’s so fuckin’ cool.” You and Joel both breathe out a sigh of relief in unison. That was all you had both wanted, Ellie’s approval. You were a family, and a team, you had to do everything together or it just didn’t work; you’d fought too hard to get to where you were. Joel put his hand on your thigh and his earlier promises that everything was going to be okay echoed in your mind. But then Ellie reminded you both of just how much of her education she had missed being in her situation and then traveling with Joel when she looked up from the photo and asked, “So when it is fully cooked, will the doctor have to cut it out of you?” Joel pulled a face and took a sharp inward breath as he patted your knee and pushed himself up off the coffee table, kissing your cheek on the way “That is all you, I am going to start dinner.”

#( love in the middle of a firefight: babydin )#pedro pascal #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal one shot #pedro pascal x you #pedro pascal x reader #joel miller #joel miller smut #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller one shot #joel miller x pregnant reader #( joel miller: babydin )

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xmissrogersx · 1 month

Text

“Sweet crazy girl” | Joel Miller

tags: Post-Outbreak, Jackson. A lot of fluff. Coffe Coffe Coffe.

a note from pris: a little short because i writed this last night wathing gilmore girls. In my mind, is a perfect scene in Jackson. Enjoy baby girls!

my writing is entirely my own. Any adaptation and/or copy is forbidden.

i hope you are enjoying my stories! U help me a lot if you give me a ♡! All the love.

priscila’ masterlist

The cool breeze blew in through the half-open bedroom window, causing the air to send a slight shiver through my body. I sighed happily, finally autumn had arrived.

Instantly, the alarm clocks began to chime marking 7 o'clock.

-You ‘re hilarious! -I threw off the covers and walked out of the room and down the stairs.

-Look, when I told you last night "tomorrow, no matter what happens, try to wake me up at 7:00", what I really meant was "tomorrow, no matter what happens, try to give me the option of waking up at 7:00, just in case I don't want to do it". Which, in the end, was the case.

-Did you break the alarm clocks, darlin'? —he said, raising an eyebrow as he prepared breakfast.

-Very funny, cowboy —I kissed his cheek. I grabbed the pot of coffee and sniffed it, stopping short.-It's decaf.

-What are you talking about? —he looks disinterested.

-You came back to change my coffee.

-I'm a busy man, baby. I don't have time to change your coffee on the sly, I have to work construction and patrols —I began to search the kitchen with him at my back. My sense of smell never failed.

-Will you stop doing that?

-Ha! —I pulled the bag under the sink and watched as Joel raised both arms and covered his head.-Very clever, mister, but not clever enough.

-All right, you know what? I give up —I smell the inside of the bag as I turn on the coffee pot.

-Nop, you don't give up —I laughed victoriously, jumping up and down, then put my hands on his face and joined our lips in a kiss. I slid my right hand to the buttons of his shirt to touch his strong chest and start distributing kisses on his neck.

-Please,baby, don't do that. You know I have to go to work —he placed his warm hand under my nightgown sending a shock down my spine. I pouted my lips a little.

-Do you have to go? —he nodded and tucked my hair behind my ear, then turned and handed me a plate of fruit and blueberry pancakes.

-My strong big man, always feeding me.

-You're welcome, darlin'. You're awake, you've got food. I'm leaving, but I'll try to be back early. Do you want me to get you anything?

-Mmm, maybe a chocolate with almonds, a Vogue magazine, some chips and cheese...

He silences me by kissing me, making the outside cease to exist and the desire to stay stronger.

-Goodbye, sweet crazy girl —then he put his hand on my hip and kissed my bulging stomach.-Goodbye to you too, little princess.

-How do you know it's a girl?

-Intuition, darlin'.

-Ellie is begging all the time for a boy.

-Well, she’s wrong, because i say so.

-Por dios, you're a daddy's girl —i coiffed his salt-and-pepper hair strands.-Have a nice day. I love you, my big old softie man.

-I love you too, sweet girl.

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and-claudias-world · 10 months

Text

Against All Odds pt. 2 (Joel Miller x fem! Reader)

Word Count: 2154

Warnings: mentions of suicide/self harm, PLEASE do not read if these are triggering for you

General Warnings for later on: The main story will have an age gap between Joel and the reader (Reader will be 25 once we get to the main storyline), this will also be your warning that it will eventually be an x pregnant reader (if that's not your jam, I'm sorry) there is also going to be more graphic/trigger parts later on so please always to be sure to read the warnings BEFORE reading. This story will also be 18+ and TO BE ON THE TAGLIST YOU CAN NOT BE AN AGELESS BLOG (i do actually check that) also there first hand full of parts are all prologue so Joel won't actually be in it for a bit

A/n after this there is going to be a few year time jump to get into the good stuff

Taglist Sign-Up (read my rules carefully before filling it out)

“This is insane, Joel.” I said after we climbed out of the window of the museum.

The only way to go from here is some sketchy-looking scaffolding. It went over the breezeway of the two buildings.

“It’s fine. Tess and I have crossed it dozens of times.”

I looked at it again, still unsure.

“I mean you can always head back, sweetheart.” He teased slightly, knowing there was no way in hell I’d walk back to the QZ alone.

“Fine… you go first.” I said.

I watched as he went across and then turned to watch me.

“Just keep your eyes on me, okay?”

I nodded and stepped up onto the plank of wood. My legs were a little shaky but I took one step, and then another, and another. Eventually, I made it across.

“Alright now, come here.” he nodded for me to follow him.

He brought me to the edge of the building. From there I could see all of what used to be the whole city of Boston. It was bigger than what I could remember it being when we first came here.

“See that building with the dome?” He asked.

“Yeah.”

“That would have been Massachusetts State House.”

“Because Boston was the capital of Massachusetts, right?” I asked.

Since I had never really gotten the opportunity to go to a real school, and school after the breakout consisted more of basic knowledge and how to survive, I never got the chance to learn things like the state capitols.

“Yup, every state had a building like that too. If you ask me, Texas had the best, it was beautiful. But I may be a bit biased.”

I laughed along with him.

“We need to get going.” Tess said from where she stood.

Joel nodded then gestured to an old, rusty, slightly mangled ladder in front of us, “After you.”

I sighed, of course, there were more sketchy routes to take to our destination. Regardless I walked over and swung my leg out onto the rungs and began climbing down as Joel and then Tess followed behind me.

When we got back down to the ground Tess led the way down the streets. We turned onto another one and the capitol building was straight ahead of us. As we got closer and passed more buildings and abandoned cars Joel watched me as I looked all around me taking it all in. When we finally made it to the building Joel let go of my hand that he had been holding since we got off the ladder and grabbed his gun. I took that as my cue to grab my knife as well and undo the top of my gun holster to have it ready.

Tess once again led the way into the building, luckily there was no welcome party for us there. Once we made it through there we crossed a bit more land until we made it into a wooded area, and then into forested land. As we got closer to the trees though, I froze dead in my tracks. Memories began flooding my mind again.

“Hey,” Joel said gently as he stepped in front of me, “You’re going to be okay. I am not going to let anything happen to you. Alright? I’ve got you.” He squeezed my hands as if to confirm what he had just said.

“What’s the issue? We need to keep moving before it gets too dark.” Tess said from about 10 yards ahead of us.

“Give us just a second.” Joel said back before turning to me, “You gonna be okay?”

I slowly nodded, “Don’t let go of my hand.”

“I won’t.”

We continued walking. I wasn’t too sure how far we had gone but it had gotten dark so we found a place to rest for the night. Then the next morning we continued traveling. Then we finally saw it.

“Holy shit! He built all of that?!” I said.

Joel laughed at my reaction as we got closer and closer to the fence. When we got right up to it, I let go of Joel’s hand as he went to the keypad and opened it. We walked in, it didn’t take us long to be greeted by who I could only assume was Bill and Frank.

Soon enough we were all sitting at a table eating together. It was some of the best food I had ever had. Then Frank brought out a bottle of wine. Real wine. The cork was still in it and everything. I had only had the homemade stuff.

He poured some for Tess and Joel before stopping at me.

"How old are you?"

"21…"

"21? Damn you're just baby aren't ya!" Bill chimed in.

I laughed off his comment, “I mean age just how long you've been here, doesn't really mean much more than that."

Truthfully, I was insecure about my age sometimes. Joel and I had met right after I had turned 20. He told me how old he was but that didn’t bother me at the time… but then again I wasn’t really planning on falling in love with him.

"Oh come on, you probably don't even remember the breakout. You were what, four?" Tess asked.

I stiffened up in my chair, "Five actually-"

"Still no one remembers life that early. You've only ever known the QZs."

"I was wearing a pink dress." I mumbled.

"What?" Joel asked.

"I said, I was wearing a pink dress. My knees were scraped up from falling off my bike earlier that week, I still have the faint scar from picking at the one on my left knee..." I began to recite the details of September 26th, 2003, "We had a creek on the back of our property that my 6 older brothers played at. I was never allowed down there because the current was too strong. But it had been a dry summer and the water level was low. My youngest brother, Alan, who was still 8 years old than me had asked if I could go to the creek and play with them. Just until Ma got home. Pa gave in and allowed me to go. We spent the whole afternoon playing hide and seek, splashing in the water, climbing trees and just having fun.”

“As the sun set we headed back for the house. We ate dinner. I took my bath and went to bed. I wasn't sure how long I was asleep but the next thing I knew my oldest brother, Scott was scooping me up out of bed, grabbing my teddy for me, and running us out to the van. I remembered crying. Scott was holding me in his lap as our dad sped out of the driveway and down the street. I just remember crying and panicking. I didn’t see Ma with us.”

“For the longest time, I pressed the memory down. Refusing to let it resurface. But eventually, as I got older I realized what I had seen before we were out of the house. At first, I thought maybe it just looked like Ma, there was no way it could be her... but I know now that it was her... what was left of her anyways. She was hunched over my brother Alan…”

I stopped and took a deep breath and wiped my eyes. The image was too much for me to explain.

"Beside her laid Roy and Marc lifeless... and that was just the first day of the outbreak. In 2008 I watched Chris take his last breaths as I scrambled to try and cut him down from the noose he made himself. Up until his last days, my father blamed me for that. If only I had been quicker to cut him down then maybe he would still be here. Seven years ago Zeak got offed… he missed a deadline or something. Got shoved off a building. You remember that story of the poor country boy who got too big for his britches? Yesh that was my brother.”

“Shit 4 years ago I was holding Scott as he bled to death in my arms after getting shot by Fire Flies. A year ago I helped Joel throw my father into the burn pits… so yeah, Tess, I may be young, but that doesn't mean that I haven't seen some shit. My age doesn't discredit what I've been through. I may not have lost a husband or a wife or a child, but I still lost family, just like you. I don't discredit you, so don't you dare do it to me!"

I stood abruptly as I finished speaking, causing the chair I was sitting in the fall over.

"Excuse me." I snapped before storming off.

3rd person PoV

"I'm not trying to discredit her experiences, I'm just saying she's young and inexperienced in some things. Her little outburst and storming off proves that." Tess said.

"Tess. Stop it." Joel said sternly.

"Seriously? You're gonna defend her?"

"You have been kinda harsh on her." Frank said.

"I'm going to go check on her." Joel said, wiping his mouth before standing up.

He found her sitting with her back against the back of the house, wiping the tears from her eyes still.

"Hey, you okay?" He asked gently.

"I'm sorry. I know crying like a baby back here probably isn't helping my case right now. Don't worry I won't come back out here with y'all ever again. Not until I'm older and more experienced." She said bitterly.

Joel took a seat beside her.

"There's nothing to be sorry for, sweetheart. Tess laid into you for no reason... I had no idea you went through all that..."

"I haven't talked about it for a reason. It hurts. Like I know everybody lost something when the outbreak happened. And everyone knows that there are people who have lost everything. But knowing that those people are out there and actually being the one that it happened to are two completely different things. You know?"

Joel nodded and took a deep breath before letting it out. When he exhaled it was clearly shaky.

"I had a daughter..."

Yn turned to him with wide eyes and he nodded, not looking at her as he continued.

"Her name was Sarah... I lost her the day of the outbreak..."

It made sense now. Yn knew that Joel's birthday was the same day as the outbreak. She figured that that was the reason why he never wanted to celebrate. But now she understood it was more than that.

"She wasn't even infected. Or killed by an infected... she had hurt her ankle... I was carrying her. We were trying to get to safety, we were stopped, by a military man. I tried to tell him that we weren't sick... he fired at us... she died in my arms..."

"Joel... I had no idea..." she was at a loss for words.

"How could you of known? I don't talk about it for the same reason you don't talk about your brothers. It hurts. I lost my baby girl... I tried to join her... that's how I got this." He point to the scar on his temple, "I flinched when I pulled the trigger."

He looked down at his lap as if he were ashamed of his admission.

"Hey, it's okay..." she grabbed his hand and gave it a squeeze, "I've tried to join my brothers more than once. I got close. Passed out a few times. Every time I woke up, bandaged up. My brothers or father always kept me here... I was planning to do it one last time, get it over with the day my dad got tossed into the burn pit... but I met you..."

“Maybe it was the universe or some shit keeping us here because we were supposed to meet.” He said only half joking.

“You don’t believe in that bullshit.” She laughed.

“No, I don’t.” He admitted, “But I am glad you stuck around.”

“You too.”

1st Person PoV

Later that day Frank was showing me around his garden and allowing me to take back a few things with us.

“So you and Joel?” He asked out of the blue.

“So me and Joel, what?”

“How long have you been together?”

I laughed at his question, “We’re not together.”

“Oh really?”

“Well, not technically… I honestly don’t know what we are…”

“You care for him, do you not?”

I nodded.

“I thought so… and boy the way he looks at you… he’s got it bad.” He said smiling to himself.

I looked over my shoulder to see Joel talking the Bill by the side of the house. And for the first time ever I allowed myself to truly think about a future with him. I wasn’t too sure what it would look like, but I knew I loved him and I wanted to be with him.

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#the last of us hbo #the last of us #joel miller x pregnant reader #joel miller x reader fluff #joel miller #joel x y/n #joel x reader #joel x reader smut #joel miller angst #joel miller fluff #joel miller smut

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cowgurrrl · 1 year

Note

I was wondering for your Look for the Light series if you could do a drabble about them figuring out she is pregnant and everyone's reactions?

Oooooo I love this!!

Evergreen

Pairing: Joel Miller x fem!reader plus platonic Ellie Williams x fem!reader

Author’s note: now feels like a good time to mention that Ellie is a little bit older in this series (15-16 years old!!) also I’ve been trying to finish this all day so I’m throwing this and running

Summary: “Nearly everything I know about love, I’ve learnt in my long-term friendships with women.” - Dolly Alderton, Everything I Know About Love aka you find out you’re pregnant [1.5k]

Warnings: pregnancy talks, grief, references to canonical violence, talks of infertility, Ellie being confused, fluff!!

"Are you pregnant?" Maria asks the second you're close enough. You signed up to patrol with her this morning but didn't know she would have a secret sixth sense for detecting if you're pregnant. It's been three months since you and Joel decided to start trying to have a baby, and so far, you haven't noticed any intense early pregnancy symptoms, which is fine. You figured it would take a while to get pregnant, and you and Joel decided to keep it a secret until you knew for a fact that you were pregnant.

"What? No." You say, turning from her to adjust the reigns on your horse, Goldie. Maria crosses her arms over her chest and stares at your profile.

"I don't believe you."

"You don't have to believe me. I'm not pregnant."

"Then, look at me when you say it." She challenges, and you press your tongue into your cheek, shaking your head. How the fuck does she know you so well? You step closer to her and look around to ensure nobody's nearby.

"I'm not pregnant," you repeat, but her gaze doesn't falter. You sigh. "Joel and I are trying, but we're keeping it a secret. There's no reason to get anybody's hopes up, so don't tell anyone, okay?"

"How long ago did you decide this?"

"A couple of months ago."

"And you're sure you're not pregnant?" She asks, and you shrug.

"I mean, I don't feel any different, but I'm a few days late," you say, and she practically beams as the words leave your mouth. "But that doesn't mean anything. When I got pregnant with Jane, I had my period the same month I took the test. Besides, it's not like pregnancy tests are just gonna fall from the sky." You try to bring her back down to earth, but she's already reaching into her bag to hand you a box of pregnancy tests. You look between her and the tests, struggling to put the pieces together.

"You've been spacey, and your boobs got huge last week, so I came to my own conclusion," she says. "I also have great mother's intuition."

"Should I be concerned that you took so much interest in the size of my boobs?"

"I mean, it was kinda hard to miss." She says, and you laugh, turning the box of tests over in your hands to check the expiration date. They're relatively new and don't expire for another year. There's also a good amount in there, at least five or six.

"Where did you even find this?" You ask as you tuck the box into your backpack.

"FEDRA still makes them. They're the shitty ninety-nine cents ones designed in 2003, but it's better than nothing." She explains. You nod and move to pull yourself onto Goldie's saddle when she looks at you expectantly. There's definitely something to be said about the Miller men's taste in stubborn women.

"I promise to take one tonight if you promise to stop talking about my boobs while we're on patrol."

"Done."

"So, she just threw a box of pregnancy tests at you?" Joel asks as he leans against the sink.

"Pretty much," you say as you stand and flush the toilet. The beauty of marriage is that you guys can still have conversations while actively taking three pregnancy tests. You push him out of the way and set them face-down on the counter as you wash your hands. He doesn't go far, lingering at your left. "You really didn't say anything to Tommy?"

"I swear."

"Maria must be a fucking witch then," you mumble as you dry your hands and look up at him. There's a glint in the deep brown of his irises, and you smirk. "Don't."

"Don't what?"

"Don't look at me like that. That look is how we got here in the first place."

"'M excited." He says as he wraps his arms around your waist from behind and kisses your jaw. You cover his hands with yours and indulge him as he sways you back and forth to a song neither of you can hear.

"We don't even know anything for sure. I don't even think I'm actually pregnant."

"Then, why did you take three?"

"I took three when I found out I was pregnant with Jane. It seemed like a good number," you say, and he hums into your neck, unconvinced. The worry scratching at the corners of your brain takes center stage, and you feel like you could puke. You take a deep breath and squeeze his wrist. "I don't want to get our hopes up for something that might not happen."

"What d'you mean?" He asks, pulling away from you enough to look at you.

"What if I can't get pregnant ever again? I've been stabbed, beaten, shot at, starved, left for dead, all of it. And that was fine as long as I survived because I never thought I'd live long enough to want another baby. But now we're here, and I'm scared," you word vomit. Joel doesn't hesitate to hug you tightly, rubbing your back and wrapping you in his warmth. A few tears fall from your eyes and stain his shirt, and you can't stop them. "I don't want to disappoint you."

"Baby, you could never disappoint me, okay? I love you. Hey," he gently holds your face in his big hands and looks at you when he hears you sniffle. "I love you. Nothin' in the world could change that. Nothin' else matters to me except for you and Ellie, and I'm so happy with the both of you. If it's us three forever, that's more than enough. If we do have a baby, that's fine, too. But nothin' about you will ever disappoint me, okay?" He asks, and you nod. He wipes your tears away with his thumbs and kisses your forehead. You still feel uncertain and shaky, but his presence soothes something profound in you.

"I think the tests should be ready." You find your voice, glancing at the three tests staring at you. You turn in his arms and try to find the courage to grab a test off the sink.

"No matter what, we're gonna be okay. We'll always be okay." He says, kissing the spot under your ear, and you nod. You take a deep breath and quickly flip the test over before you can change your mind.

"Oh, shit," you breathe as soon as you spot the dark, unmistakable lines. Joel reaches around you and grabs another one, and another pair of dark lines greet you. You pick the third and final one up and see the positive markings. Three yeses and six identical lines fill you with hope, starkly different than your gut reaction to your three positive tests at sixteen. You turn to look at Joel and find him staring at the test with tears falling down his cheeks. "Oh, baby," you murmur as you wrap your arms around his neck and hug him. "Are these happy tears?" You ask, and he laughs.

"The happiest," he says, and you smile. He buries his head in your neck, and you cry together. At their core, they're happy tears for the new baby you'll be having together, but you know he's remembering when he found out about Sarah the same way you're thinking about Jane. It's bittersweet. You think it always will be. You imagine a huge electric sign pointing to your grief as if it were a nightclub, announcing that love was once here. Then, in the smallest font possible, there is a note stating that love still is. "We're gonna have a baby."

"We're gonna have a baby." You repeat as he kisses you. You would stay there forever, wrapped up in him, but the sound of the front door opening and closing forces you to pull away.

"Hello? Is anyone home?" Ellie calls from downstairs, and your eyes widen at Joel.

"In here!" You yell back. You quickly hide the tests behind your back and do your best to look natural as you stand with Joel in the bathroom with tears staining your faces. You don't hide it very well. Ellie can see that much as she steps into the threshold of your bathroom with the Ellie Stink Face on.

"Why are we all hanging out in here?" She asks, and you can't even answer her. You just hand her the pregnancy test and watch as her mind works. You and Joel are buzzing as you wait for her reaction, hoping for something big and sweet, but she shrugs. "I don't get it." She says, and Joel laughs. Sometimes it's easy to forget that Ellie was born after the world fell apart.

"So, I just took this test to see if I'm pregnant. Two lines mean yes." You explain, and she finally lights up, her eyes bouncing between you and Joel.

"You're gonna have a baby?" She asks, and you nod. "Oh, my fucking God!" She yells as she wraps you in a big hug, jumping up and down with you in her arms.

"Hey, be gentle. There's precious cargo in there." Joel teases, but Ellie barely reacts to his words. Instead, she hugs him, still jumping up and down. There's nothing purer in the world than her squeals of joy and trying to answer her million questions. You like to think that Jane and Sarah are somewhere nearby, maybe in the next room you can't see quite yet, listening and getting just as excited as Ellie.

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taglist: @evyiione @nyotamalfoy @abbyhaslongshorts

#look for the light #the last of us #joel and ellie #joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller fic #the last of us x reader #joel tlou #ellie williams #joel miller the last of us #joel miller fluff #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x pregnant reader #I love them your honor

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thewritersaddictions · 10 months

Text

Drabble- Joel Miller: Birthday Time

Joel had a birthday today regardless of him not yet telling me I knew that secret inforamtion. Now that we had been in Jackson for a whole year. Tommy had gotten comfortable with his older brother being around, and with me being around.

He was happier then he probably let on that Joel had found someone to be with. We both knew how hard losing his daughter had been not that there were many stories shared between the two of us.

Ellie had saved him, and Joel had saved me. Ellie had finally found some sort of stablity. Joel and I could see the smile that would grow on her face as kids her age came knocking on our front door asking if she come out and doing something totally legal with them.

I had asked Tommy just a few months ago when Joels birthday actually was. "Tommy?" I called out his name in the mess hall. "Hmm, Y/n what can I do for ya?" He answered as he closed the distance. "I have something important I need to tell Joel but I want to do it on his birthday. So, when is that?" I asked, the cold weather was already growing in Jackson. My three layers and little gloves that made my hands warm were keeping me comfort as I waited for Tommy to answer.

Brows turned down, "He hasn't told you?" Tommy asked, I rolled my eyes dramtically. "He told me bullshit, I don't believe him sayin' his birthday has already passed" I said tugging at my gloves. "Yeah he has a tendency to do that, well let's see" Tommy looked up towards the roof, looked like he was counting in his head. "This month actually hmm… somethin' like the 26th, he's turning somethin' like fifty-seven. Does that help?" Tommy asked, curious as a black cat. I nodded and placed my gloves back on my hand.

The months were hard to keep track of sometimes, and if you got lucky you'd find something that would drag you right into the time period you'd need. Well I had that. I was on a clock for the next seven months at least. I walked home, and waited until Ellie came back from hanging out with her friends.

"Ellie I have to ask you to help me in the kitchen please!" I yelled out, "Kay be there in a second." Ellie came trotting, "I need you to help make a cake for Joel, it's his birthday soon." Her face bloomed with exctiement, "Really! We have everything we need? For fucking real" I smiled and nodded my head.

Cooking with Ellie was 'exciting' She was a choatic baker. Floor and sugar laid across the counter top, and egg shells had somehow ended up in the batter mix. "I need one more favor from you?" "Hmm?" "Can you see if the town has any birthday candles?" She saluted me and ran off grabbing her coat before slamming the door. For the time she was gone the cake baked and gave the house a new and refreshing smell of warmth and love.

As the oven dinged and the door slammed I knew it was Ellie. Catching her breath, hands resting on her knees. "I… Icould only fucking find like a few.." She muttered trying to catch her breath. I took them from her hand and kissed her forehead. "That's fine Ell." We waited together, until the cake cooled and I could ice it.

I told Ellie about the secret, knowing she'd be far to excited about it to let me say in front of Joel without her knowing first. "Ellie, I have a surprise for Joel. Do you wanna know it first?" I asked, her browd kintted together. "What kind of surprise?" I cleared my thoart. "I'm pregnant." I said simply, confusion then exictment, then happiness. "Oh hell, Y/n I'm gonna have a little sibiling." My tears started to prickly with tears, then Ellie was hugging me.

I placed the candles in the cake and waited for the second slam on the Jackson house door. "Ellie, Y/n?" Joel screamed out, "You just wait right there, old man." Ellie screamed out. The heavy footsteps stopped, "why?" I laughed, and Ellie giggled. Ellie walked out first, turning off the living room light and I walked behind her with a few lite candles ontop the cake.

"Why did the lights go out?" Joel muttered, "Oh you stop it, today is an important day today." I said softly. "What are you two up to now?" He asked trying to hold back his own laugh. "Fucking open your eyes!" Ellie screamed when I got close enough to Joel.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JOEL." Ellie and I shouted. "How'd you know… did… who told you it was my birthday?" A few questions came out of Joels mouth. "Blow out your candles will ya, I wanna slice of that shit." Joel rolled his eyes and looked at me over the flames, blowing out the candles. The dark took over the room once more, but Ellie was quick to flick the lights on and grab the cake from my plams. "Careful Ell." "Yeah, yeah I want a slice." She walked to the kitchen leaving just Joel and I alone. "Tommy told me." I said softly, as Joels arm wrapped around my waist and pulled me in. His lips were cold and a little chapped but I didn't care. I kissed him back with purpose. "I missed you ya know." Joel mutters agasint my lips.

"What did you wish for baby?" I ask Joel, he thinks for a moment and puts his forehead to mine. "For a family with you, but I already have that darlin'. I've got you and Ellie that's all I need." Joel says. I back away just ever so slightly. I look Joel right in his eyes, bitting my bottom lip.

"What about if we added another to our little family?" I asked, scared now that maybe Joel didn't want this baby we were going to have. "One more wouldn't be so bad, but I'm not getting any younger, darlin'." Joel said dragging me back into his chest. "Good" I muttered, "Because I have something to tell you." I felt Joel tense agasint me. "Hmm" "I'm…" "She's pregnagnt with a baby and shit." I heard Ellie scream from the other room. Joel looked over at her, then down at me pressed agasint his chest. My cheeks warm with embrasmessment. I nodded my head.

Joel smiled, his eyes brighting up somehow more, and he reached down bring his warmed up lips towards mine. Kissing me softly. A large warm hand landed on my lower stomach. "How far along?" Joel muttered softly, just between the two of us. "I'd say two months." Joel smile only grow.

"A baby and a birthday." I hummed along with him, "Hey you save me and my girl a slice, Ellie." I heard Ellie scoff, but bring out more plates.

Completed on: 05/24/2023

Posted on: 06/21/2023

Last of Us-

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