#its more of a tragic scene tho than a funny one
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Nate ranks every transformers thing ever
What:
- Eugenesis
i have no idea how i can ethically rank this as good or bad. its good. its bad. its canon. its fanfiction. it is what it is. dont read eugenesis. please read eugenesis.
God tier:
- Rescue bots
i am not joking. i am not memeing. rescue bots is the best thing to ever come out of the transformers franchise. its the only series to break the three season curse and get a fourth season. it has more episodes than any other series, over 100. it didn’t get cancelled because it wasn’t popular, it ended because they ran out of stories they wanted to tell. then they dropped a sequel series with TWO more seasons. they gave nicole duboc a mainline series for this.
- Mtmte/lost light
life changing. incredible. ruined my life. saved my life. jro is my enemy. jro is my best friend. jro is my dad. i met him once. i showed him my hard copy of eugenesis i paid 150 dollars for and had him sign it. he probably thinks im insane. he DID sign it tho. i think about whirl and cdrw every day of my life
- Cyberverse
I LOVE CYBERVERSE SO MUCH... I don't think any series has captured the pure unbridled chaos of the entire franchise so well. It has so many characters and all of them feel RIGHT. I love the art style. I Love this unhinged soundwave. I LOVE the fresh and interesting new ideas if brought to the table. Season 3 was incredible. The season 4 specials destroyed me. TARN??? TARN IS HERE???
- Rise of the Beasts
I think that Bumblebee is an objectively better film, I just had more fun watching ROTB lol
- Bumblebee movie
- Rescue bots academy
BABY GIRL MY BABY DAUGHTER BABY GIRL BABY BABY
- Earthspark
- Botbots
Yes I am in fact putting botbots this high. This show was so unrepentantly funny. The goof at the beginning show us like oooh space ENERGON crashed to earth the war... Anyway none of that matters lets go to the mall. That is SO funny. They did a chopping mall parody and a Hamilton parody. The protagonist is an unhinged megalomaniac burger.
- Beast wars
don't worry about the visuals you get used to them so fucking fast. beast wars is incredible. the storytelling has so much depth. tigatrons big episode about the cost of their war against the planet and defining what protecting the planet even means changed me. theres an entire episode about farting and rampage and depth charge wanna hate fuck SO bad its fucking unreal
- Recordicons
you WILL acknowledge david willis’s contribution to lgbt history and you WILL laugh at his very funny memes
Great tier:
- Transformers Prime
- Transformers Animated
waspy baby.....
- Idw shattered glass
IM UNHINGED ABOUT SG STARSCREAM AND SG STARFIRE IM ABSOLUTELY UNHINGED
- 86 movie (Bluray remaster)
-the five minutes at the end of earthrise when cog became the main character for some reason
This was the funniest shit I've ever seen. One of the worst most boring shitty tf shows I've sat through with characters I truly care nothing for suddenly lurched sideways as out of fucking nowhere and for no reason at all a random background character suddenly took over the plot and gave the most harrowing performance I've seen in awhile in this horrifically tragic death scene that had my jaw on the floor. And then we just moved on and never spoke of it again ckdhzhcjof. WHAT WAS THAT.... LITERALLY WHAT WAS THAT AND WHY DID THAT HAPPEN....
- Armada (the starscream and Optimus parts)
It is UNREAL how good the starscream and Optimus bits are in this show. When the rest of it is pretty terrible. I would say after starscream dies it's pretty meh but not outright bad, just sort of nothin. The first couple episodes tho are so funny because they're so bad they had no script and were all but ad-libbing the whole thing. They couldn't go two minutes without getting a characters name wrong. Incredible. Anyway this starscream is legendary for being such an interesting and dynamic character with the best design ever. And just like. The coolest character arc.
Okay but also just like do not watch this show in English. The English version is awful and it is More than just a dub!! The Japanese version was finished AFTER the American version despite being animated in Japan!! Because the show! Was not! Done!!! The Japanese version of the show is called micron legend and it's practically a different show. Do yourself a favor and watched micron legend subbed.
- Victory
STAR SABER IS MY DAD OK
also the plot hinges around the premise that current autobot commander star saber found a human infant floating through space and legally adopted him. That's incredible come on
- IDW windblade mini
saren stone could kill me with a brick and i would thank them
Good tier:
- Transformers RiD15 IDW comic
-Beast Wars 2 movie
- IDW2
- MMC mnemo/notif comic *
- Transformers go!
FUCK YEAH DRAGONS
- Funpub shattered glass
- Beast Wars uprising
DID YOU KNOW EJECT HAS A FUCKING SON?
Okay Tier:
- Wfc: Siege
- Zone
homosexual
- Challenge of the Go Bots *
Bad tier:
- The rest of IDW1
- G1
I'm not sorry for this. I don't like it. Boo
- Japanese headmasters
- Armada (the rest of it)
- Energon
- American headmasters
- Robotix *
im fucking unironically convinced when this flopped they just reused the plot for headmasters
- Wfc: earthrise
- Super god masterforce
- Beast wars 2
- Beast wars neo
- Beast machines
- RiD 2001
- 86 movie (pre bluray remaster)
- Cybertron
- Vanpires *
the wildest shit ive ever seen. ive watched every episode. imagine the cgi of beast wars season 1 with integrated live action. theres vampire cars and they "drain the gas from innocent cars" when cars??? not sentient???? the human children got irradiated and now they can turn into fucking horrible car beasts. why was this fucking made
- Bayverse
- Machinama’s Prime Wars
You know a series is bad when the first thing I want to complain about is the sound mixing
- Go-bots (transformers branded)
- Wfc: kingdom
Elite one my beloved I am so fucking sorry
Burn in hell tier:
- Rid15
Copaganda to rival paw patrol
- Exodus
This book called me a slur
- Hayato sakamoto’s Transformers Legends
- Kiss players
The worst thing transformers has ever done
??? (I still havent read/watched these) tier:
- Robot Masters
- Devastation
I played twenty minutes of this
- WfC
I’ve actually played a few hours of this but i got bored and didn’t finish so I don’t feel like i should rate it, but ultimately i just found it kind of generic and it didnt grab me
-FoC
-Wings Universe
-Unite Warriors
this is illustrated by hayato sakamoto and ive seen enough of like, the horny bathtub art and oversexualized female characters to assume its most likely shit tier, but i think he also brought breakdown back to life and canonized kobd? I do legitimately want to read this eventually
-Transtech
-Marvel comics
-GI Joe transformers crossover comics
-Dreamwave comics
-new energon universe image comic
-Q transformers
I have actually watched the subbed episodes of this but, there’s so few of them and its so clearly not intended for me since this is like a little silly flash cartoon specifically for japanese fans of transformers that its like, of course i dont really get the jokes or anything so even though i found this kind of boring i dont think its bad and i dont feel comfortable putting it on a tier
- TFP tie in games
- Bayverse tie in games
- Earth Wars
Energon enema though
- IDW MLP crossover
- Nezha
Nezha is lost media but it has toys and I have one so uhhhh I guess I'm acknowledging it theoretically exists
* don't act like this doesn't count, once you're deep enough to make a list ranking every transformers thing ever made you have to start counting this type of shit too
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anyway tho like. now that ive played the 1.2 story and sat on it a bit id say my overall thoughts are def mixed. i enjoyed a lot of it but theres some things that sorta just stick out or dont work and the pacing definitely worked against the story
(just a long rant/ramble upcoming its not coherent at all lol)
one thing that rly rubbed me the wrong way was like. while overall this story rly sold fu xuan as a character to me (i was a huge fan of her presence overall) the dan shu thing just felt? wrong? and like to be clear it wasnt just fu xuan the scenes writing was off in general but her role in being the one countering dan shus points just made her p central to the problem.
but like my issue is that dan shu is previously established as having very understandable reasons behind her resentment of lan that made her compelling as twist villain imo. Yet that resolve was nowhere in the scene in her rebuttal of the xianzhous ways?? when i think that shouldve been The moment of her calling out the xianzhou and actually challenging fu xuan properly. it wouldve been an even better opportunity to expand upon how fu xuan responds to being confronted with the xianzhous flaws and hypocrisy and problems. but somehow yassified dan shu really just. had a generic villain speech and thats it. the callback to their heritage as former followers of abundance was... fine? but like it wasnt that impactful. and fu xuan essentially calling her nothing but a power hungry villain when thats very much Not what dan shus motivation boils down to sucks and now players who didnt read her diary or play/pay attention to her side quest will think of her as just a generic bad guy and not a very tragic complex figure of her own
then the like. underutilization of blade was just like. ok what was the point. it IS funny to reference the tuxedo mask meme and how he skewers his ex yet immediately gangs up with him against yanqing and all but honestly he shouldve gotten to be more feral and present than he did like its just meh. ig its kafka keeping him from messing up elios script but cmon. i want more of him. yanqing also got done so dirty in that scene like. he shouldve gotten some more screentime and focus even if his job was p much to just get bodied. kid just watched jing yuan make deals with criminals no way he isnt affected by it
in general i was p shocked how inexistent the high cloud quintet was from the story. but ig w how rushed the pacing was for dan hengs backstory reveals at times already ig its better left for later (hopefully). i just rly hope this means that the topic get its time to shine properly in the future. esp since im p sure they never even named any of dan fengs crimes outright which is a curious choice.
jing yuan got a rly solid characterization and i definitely enjoyed it!!! even if im a little miffed at how they didnt give dan heng enough breathing room to come to terms with the emotional impact of facing his past and memories thanks to the plot moving forward so fast and he was kinda the one leading that. but he was still great - i liked the scheming side to him and the arguably pretty ruthless way he leveraged dan hengs exile status to force his hand to cooperate a lot. his reasoning makes sense obvi but its still a very brutal and utilitarian approach and i like that energy for his character. his duty is to the luofu above all else even if thats far from all he is about. overall his and dan hengs interactions including dan heng very much emphasizing his desire to be seen as separate from dan feng were a highlight for sure. and jing yuans final showdown moment against phantylia slapped obviously
and then w dan heng im torn between like. really loving all the good stuff we got with the insane cutscenes and the vidyadhara echoes and then wishing that he got just that little bit more for his own realizations and inner conflict. and the part about not properly featuring blade also hurt his story too imo bc the anticlimactic nature of the scene where blade confronts him and forces the transformation and how he n kafka just... leave rly kinda flattens the impact of the reveal moment esp since thats when jing yuan just all but openly says ok time for the plot. but they still did a great job selling DHIL and i think im overall a fan of how they seem to have handled the dan feng vs dan heng thing (and its roughly what i was expecting). dan feng is dead but its never just that simple either. i hope theyll be exploring the exact nature of dan fengs sins and the sedition in the future
im so mad i spoiled myself the tingyun thing bc jfc the neck snap wouldve hit So hard if the reveal itself was also a complete surprise. and its sth that was genuinely well built up like i remember thinking her 1.0 dialogue was kinda sus but wouldve never imagined the actual truth. dont do leaks folks sometimes this happens and it sucks :/ but i have to say phantylia herself was kinda? underwhelming. i liked when she picked up jing yuan like a little bug she wanted to squish and the boss fight was cool but to be fair. this was like 50% bc of how bad the sound mixing was for all of her dialogue that overlapped w in game battle. she rly lacks the necessary menace and imposing energy when u can barely even make out what shes saying 😭 her voice shouldve been as loud and large as her..... Presence. jing yuan carried the boss fight and the final cutscene but man the fade to black rly didnt do the abrupt ending any favors like we just teleport to exalted sanctum and thats it???? maybe jing yuan dies maybe not!!!
overall my prime issue is p much just how like. it feels like they shoved 3-4 mini arcs worth of stuff into one speedrun when all of them deserved more focus and exploration and the pacing rly got rough at times. it wasnt like inazuma level bad but it does get me wondering if hoyos just bad at doing these big conclusions to prior build up and holding the story threads tightly together until the end.
this comes off as super negative helpp but like. by no means did i hate all of it so dont take it the wrong way lmao. its more that there was good stuff there but also wasted potential. for the most part i was having a blast but to be fair that was 40% just playing blade ridiculously underleveled through it all. i only got him to lvl 80 for the boss fight
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i saw your tags and i am dying to know the four GO related costumes, if it isn’t too much trouble to ask? ♥️
Ok ok ok here's the thing, this might be more than you bargained for because it's not four costumes, it's four years worth of costumes and inspired looks I have too many of those lets not talk about that.
Break so I can insert some pictures where I have them.
You see, I started cosplaying Crowley in 2019, like half of the rest of this fandom. I saw the show, I made my best friend watch it, she asked if Aziraphale and Crowley could be our Halloween costume for the year, I agreed exclusively on the grounds I could be Crowley, and the rest is essentially history.....except it's not because if my life isn't one cosmic joke what's the point right. My hair was purple at the time and I insisted I wasn't going to dye it for this, despite everyone I knew asking about it. So we did Halloween, at speed, mind you, so it was more about does it look like them rather than does it look like them, but doing these costumes gave me brain rot bad.
This is genuinely one of the best photos I'm going to be able to share with you rn, because someone took these photos of me intentionally. My best friend/Aziraphale had prior plans and this kinda got dropped on me like what costume can you wear to go to the cemetery approximately now.
In December, I started dying my hair red, we're all laughing because it's funny.
Obviously this was right before the plague times and I was still in undergrad at the time. We had a socially distanced halloween party the next year between the costume and scene shops, and I wore basically the same thing, just with doc martens and sfx contacts that time because I was working on a much larger costume for my undergrad capstone (tho not my history capstone, that was tragically different.) I started working on a late Victorian women's ensemble in black and green that was intended to be versatile enough to be both historically accurate in settings that needed it, while also being able to be an all out cosplay, just an inspired one. I didn't actually get good picture of it until late last year when I had shifted into what I call "stupidly" red hair dye and cut my hair (I was in grad school when s2 filming pictures started to come out, it does something to your brain, you make interesting choices during Thanksgiving break.)
(Enjoy a rare film photo of @christinedieae and I, we were working on these outfits together, and mostly in the same work space in 2021, so it was a mission to photograph these two together because they were so different on the dress forms.)
In 2021, I attended Ren Fair for the first time and made pirate inspired looks for my best friend and I. Tragically I don't have any photos from this year other than us at like 8am in my driveway and I'm not willing to share them rn but I made this full length sleeveless coat with fabric i found at joanns that year that has snakes and roses. I also wore it last year but it was very cold and windy that day so the only photo of me is my "Anakin storming the temple" look, peak my red wig and the best garment I've ever made, my cloak.
Then, some of my favorite ren fair looks from last year. The halo is one of the single best purchases I've made while costuming, and at this point its been a while.
The only down side to ren fair is that I'm often without an Aziraphale, as my best friend has become a bird (this is a genuine logistical challenge and at times takes between three and four of us to manage at the fair grounds so my full length snake skirt might not be returning to the fair this year.) Said bird also steals my glasses.
Here's another look with selections pulled from my historical wardrobe for a wizarding event at the museum I work at last year. This was the first time anyone I worked with saw my contacts and I have found it's good to warn people who know me because they find it a serious jumpscare. Some adults also have opinions, but kids really seem to like them.
And then some silly things from an event we attended in May last year. It was Friday the 13th and easily 100 degrees. I made Aziraphale's waistcoat in a week because I wasn't insane enough already (when you get motivation to do something you take it idk). On an even bigger my life is a cosmic joke note, when the first s2 pictures came out with the leather waistcoat I got in my closet and finally begrudgingly admitted my mom was right, because I had a leather waistcoat she had given me from the 80s.
I feel like I might have posted some of these photos here before, I remember asking for an "angel ( )" caption for my friend dressed as Castiel, and the groupchat soundly rejecting "angel (homosexual)" as too non-specific. It was very hot, we descended into insanity by the end of the night, a group of girls recognized us while we were trapped in the middle of this tiny candy store, chaos at its finest. This is also the night where someone referred to our group as the "most attractive group of queer people" they'd ever seen, and thus named our group chat.
I know there have been sooooo many more, some combination of all of this is how I dress on the daily so I'm kinda always testing new or inspired looks. And our ren fair opens this weekend, and I've been working on making and acquiring some fun new things for some new looks this year, so I'll have more looks very soon.
The last thing I can leave you with, I suppose, is this. I'm going to a wedding in October with costumes encouraged, but all black is off the table. SO I'm recreating an Edwardian gown in a red silk I found that is cross woven with black threads so it has this shift to it while still looking red, the silk is called Omen.
My darling Aziraphale is @jesterjamboree as always. @frameratess also appears here, and is often the only one of us remembering to take pictures. And already mentioned is @christinedieae, we egg each other on with our crazy ideas.
#haha have i ever mentioned that im crazy#im a firm believer in looking exactly how you want to all the time#even when other people think youre crazy#the smuggler sews#the smuggler cosplays
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this is me asking you about metal gear do you have a favourite from each game
oh my gosh (shaking) im just gonna do the ones ive watched or played also this was very hard because i love them all and i tried not to cheap out and just pick everyone by doing all the games
mgs1: otacon :3 hes so. just. i want to shake him around hes clearly socially awkward but it doesnt feel mean in how its portrayed and of course the final scene of “hal and dave, huh…” AH I LOVE IT
mgs2: i do like raiden but i kinda gotta go with snake 😭 even tho you dont really even play as him! im not a raiden hater but i love the iroquois pliskin persona. its so silly, and the fact that it just manages to work perfectly is also amazing
mgs3: very hard one. LOVE baby ocelot here because his inexperience causes his personality to be so different and he isnt yet calculating like in later games, but again i gotta toss this to a snake. john is also very goofy (dropping bees on a guy and smiling about it??) and i also love the way he beats ocelot, but lets him grow as an opponent.
mgspw: okay tbf i havent played or watched this but i know a decent amount and i love kaz in it haha
mgs4: ahhhhhhh, it was really good of a game but also there was a lot wrong with it, makes it a bit hard to pick. i think otacon? hes grown so much since he first met snake. i love seeing how he and snake interact, and who can forget that ending, as snake monologues on the black screen. i think i like character relationships more than i like individual characters in this game tbh.
mgsv: HELP. EVERYONE. but to pick one. surprisingly i think i have to go with huey. i hate him so much, which is why i love him. hes so well written to cause you to hate him, i audibly gasped at some of the things he said to snake.
mgrr: RAIDEN!!!!! finally its his turn lmao XD. his story is so tragic when you look past “haha funny cyborg” but also hes still very badass and his design fucks so hard. shoutout to shinkawa you never miss homie.
honorable mentions of mgsv kaz, ocelot, and monsoon, i wish i could throw them in there but i picked who i picked.
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the bad batch + what romance/rom com movies they watch with you
each of the bad batch x gn!reader
ok first and foremost i really truly believe to the pits of my soul that every single one of these fuckos loves romances and you cannot under any circumstances change my mind
ALSO it’s a gender neutral reader except kinda in echo’s theres like a very brief quote regarding breasts but like i still think even that is pretty gender neutral tbh
so anyway
Hunter: Pretty Woman
this is not the first time that i have publicly declared that i think hunter has a deep rooted connection to the movie pretty woman and it will not be the last
first of all this movie is incredibly soothing to hunters overwhelming savior complex
second of all hunter is literally richard gere (debonaire but emotionally distant gentleman that learns to love) and julia roberts (hooker with a heart of gold) at the same time
he was a little skeptical the first time you put it on but he instantly fell in love with it
the humor, the sensuality, the class divide, the glamour, the unconventional cinderella story of it all. it just really butters his bread
after the first time, when you suggest watching a movie and you pick this one he’ll act very aloof about it (“whatever you want cyar’ika, it doesn’t matter to me”) but secretly he’s really really happy bc it’s one of his favorites (you def know this and def pick it more often)
he absolutely hates the scene when stucky the lawyer hits vivian. like it doesn’t matter how many times he watches it he will fully turn his head away from the screen and say “I don’t like this part” and when it’s over he nuzzles a little closer into you and very tenderly kisses your forehead
he loves the soundtrack too. like he fully exposes how much he likes the movie when you catch him singing or humming “pretty woman” or “it must have been love” absently to himself (you kept it to yourself for a while but eventually you just had to tease him about it. he just smiled a little sheepishly and admitted he liked the songs before promptly changing the subject)
hunter also lowkey definitely wants to recreate the ending where richard gere shows up to her apartment in the white limo with you bc he thinks it’s such a sweet gesture and he wants to treat you like royalty
Crosshair: 10 Things I Hate About You
if there’s one thing about crosshair it’s that he’s a sucker for the enemies to lovers genre
maybe its just him projecting (spoiler alert it most certainly is) but he really enjoys watching the drama conflama of a miserable bastard be tricked into love
and really that’s the true essence of 10 Things I Hate About You
he will grumble and bitch and moan about not wanting to watch a ‘chick flick’ when you put it on, but 15 minutes in and he’s hooked
he has strong negative opinions on literally every single character except for kat and patrick
(crosshair really really wants to think he’s patrick but when it comes down to it he is katarina stratford in every single possible way)
he doesn’t say a word throughout the entire movie but you can tell when he’s annoyed at like bianca or cameron or joey bc he will openly scoff at them
will absolutely hum along in your ear during the “can’t take my eyes off you” scene and make out with you during the paintball scene
(seriously he wants to be patrick verona so bad)
when it’s over and you ask him what he thought he’ll roll his eyes and say “i guess it could have been worse” but his little smirk let’s you know he enjoyed it a lot more than he’s willing to admit
Tech: 50 Shades of Grey
ok hear me out on this one
tech is a huge movie talker. like subtitles are a non-negotiable if you wanna be able to take in any of the movies dialogue bc tech is most likely gonna make commentary over it the whole time
this makes him absolutely indescribably so much fun to watch bad/corny movies with
he will go off about EVERYTHING. the plot, the dialogue, the acting, the costuming, the music, the production quality. nothing and no one is safe. whether you just enjoy letting him talk at you or you join in on the roast, cheesy movies are a hoot between you two
and honey. 50 shades is one of THE cheesiest movies ever
you and tech will literally spend the entire duration of the movie tearing it to shreds
and the thing is tech is a very sarcastic, funny guy when he wants to be (and when it comes to you he definitely wants to be) so by the end of it he will have you in absolute stitches from laughing at the ridiculousness of both the movie and him
with any of the other batchers watching a movie like this either turns into a shy, slightly awkward experience (wrecker, echo) or an incorrigibly horny experience (crosshair, hunter)
but in this context tech literally has no shame or squeamishness about sexual things (why should he it’s a natural biological process?) so to yall the sex stuff is just another thing to roast
literally christian grey could be fully tying dakota johnson down and flogging her and tech will be like “in the last 3 minutes they have panned up to her nipples 4 times. this is criminally shoddy cinematography”
even tho he’s busy giving a detailed play by play critique, he never fails to keep some sort of physical contact with you (wrapping an arm around you and running his hand up and down your skin, playing with your fingers or your hair) so you know he’s enjoying spending this time with you despite his nasty words about the movie
also 1000% after you watch it tech will do extensive research on the ins and outs of bdsm and will have lots of hypotheses he wants to test out (as long as you’re willing and able ofc) ;)))
Wrecker: 13 Going On 30
of all the bad batch members, wrecker is the only one who unabashedly loves any movie that could be considered a chick flick
like he doesn’t even try to hide it or act like he’s too masculine for it. he loves romance and he’s proud of it
this man will have full marathons with you. rom coms, regular roms, tragic roms, hallmark roms, you name it and he’s game
his absolute favorite tho is 13 Going On 30
i feel like he has a huge soft spot for childhood best friends to lovers stories like he finds that type of lifelong partnership so endearing (and he loves to live vicariously through jenna since that type of romance was obviously never an option for him)
wrecker is also very childlike at heart and i think the idea of a 13 year old sweetheart trapped inside the body of a 30 year old cut throat magazine exec is so amusing to him (and maybe makes him feel just a little bit represented in the media)
he is definitely the type to completely engulf you in a cuddle for the entirety of the movie and he DEFINITELY cries into your shoulder at matty’s wedding when jenna is crying on the stoop with her dream house
he wants to try razzles so bad. like so bad. i think if he ever came across them somewhere he would barter at least one of his brothers for them
wrecker really just loves love and watching movies about it just reminds him of how lucky he is to have his own love story with you <3
Echo: The Princess Bride
i feel like it’s glaringly obvious why echo loves this movie
pirates. sword fighting. decades long revenge plots. the value of an honorable, loyal man. true love that never wavers even in the face of devastating tragedy and the darkest of hardships. clever but goofy humor.
echo considers this an action/adventure movie and NOT a romance movie (even tho it 100% totally is a romance movie) and requests to watch it very frequently
he can quote the whole thing. i’m seriously telling you echo loves the princess bride with his whole chest
even tho he refuses to admit it’s a love story above all else, he really does try to model himself in your relationship after wesley
like especially given what happened at the citadel and all the time you thought he was dead, the cinematic parellels are alive and present in y’alls relationship and he strives to be even half the man to you that wesley is to buttercup
literally in your day to day life he will sometimes respond to your requests with a smooth “as you wish ;)” (it doesn’t matter how many times he does it it still gives you butterflies)
when you watch the movie, he snuggles as close to you as possible and does his best to make youre comfy the whole time (he’s insecure about his prosthetics hurting you no matter how much you reassure him they don’t)
he just loves to be able to feel your heartbeat and your laugh when you giggle at the funny bits
every single time without fail at the part when buttercup is about to stab herself he leans down, ghosts his lips against the shell of your ear, and whispers the line in time with wesley: “there’s a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. it would be a pity to damage yours”
every single time without fail you wind up making out until he pulls away and tells you to watch the next part when wesley challenges humperdinck to a duel to the pain
echo just loves you to bits and wants you to know he’d endure a thousand fire swamps for you
Omega: Clueless
i have this really specific obsession with omega being a total girly girl and having very traditionally feminine interests as she keeps experiencing the universe and being exposed to a spectrum of gender expression beyond clone (masc and boring) and kaminoan (ugly)
so with that headcanon of her in mind, it’s vital to me that she sees clueless as soon as possible
clueless is an essential piece of media for a girl entering adolescence and i will die on this hill
it has literally everything you want and everything you need to develop into a well-rounded young woman
it’s so deliciously 90s and glamorama and valley girl humor and camp. its got meaningful female friendships and valuable life lessons and paul mf rudd
if there’s one thing you should encourage a burgeoning hetero teen girl to do, it’s to stick to dating guys like paul rudd in clueless. the earlier this message can be broadcast the better
the second you’re able to steal omega away from hunters watchful eyes (“hunter we’re just gonna watch finding nemo i swear!”) you show her this movie
at this point omega is not really a girly girl, but omega also has absolutely zero feminine influence in her life
the first time she sees clueless she is absolutely obsessed. like seriously she is so enamoured with the glitz and glam of cher horowitz
she asks you questions the entire time. she wants to know about EVERYTHING. the makeup, the clothes, the hair, the slang
(she definitely goes around saying stuff like “i’m totally bugging” for long enough afterwards that almost all of the boys have slipped up at least once with some ridiculous valley girl slang. you thought you were gonna die of laughter when you overheard tech say “as if!” to wrecker in the middle of an argument)
it just really introduces her to this whole world of femininity that she didn’t even know existed and she absolutely loves it
she makes you watch clueless with her seriously once a week at minimum. she begs you to style her hair like tai’s and you can’t help yourself when you happen to run across a little yellow plaid dress and buy it for her on sight
(hunter was gonna scold you for recklessly spending credits until he saw how omega almost cried from how happy she was for the gift)
honestly she enjoys the romance of it all and paul rudd is def her first celebrity crush but she enjoys more that you and her now have this special thing of hair and nails and pretty dresses
she loves how confident and beautiful and special you’re able to make her feel, and you love that you get to bring her that small sense of normalcy and happiness
#the bad batch#bad batch#tbb#the bad batch headcanons#tbb crosshair#tbb hunter#tbb wrecker#the bad batch x reader#tbb echo#tbb tech#tbb x reader#crosshair tbb#hunter tbb#tech tbb#wrecker tbb#echo tbb#omega tbb#tbb omega#hunter x reader#crosshair x reader#tech x reader#echo x reader#wrecker x reader
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watched s11ep1
i will provide you with a quick review before i disappear back into the ether of twd avoidance
lots of spoilers under the cut. also i wrote way too much and i worked all night and haven’t slept so i didn’t bother to reread literally any of it, so it might be completely nonsensical, tho if you don’t expect that from me by this point idk whose blog you’ve been reading
enjoy:
hokay, first off, i’ll start by saying that i enjoyed it more than i expected to. i’ve been avoiding any sort of discussion about stuff, but my google algorithm is so fucked at this point that i still get recommended articles and stuff every now and then, so i was already pretty aware of what i was walking into, and was expecting it to be eh, but actually i prob enjoyed it more than i enjoyed the finale
(don’t get too excited tho, the finale was rly boring lmfao)
anyway
episode starts off with a tense scouting mission
it takes .005 seconds into the episode for caryl to exchange a look of longing, establishing that they are still having weird conflict and are both too fucking stubborn to do anything about it even tho they hate it desperately
i imagine that will continue for a while
rosita, kelly, carol, maggie, what’s her face with the bad hair, and lydia (i think that’s everyone?) lower down to some army bunker or something, where a bunch of walkers are taking a snooze, and the girls are very respectful of walker naptime, and do their best not to wake them up
obviously they eventually wake up, but i’ll get to that in a sec
as they’re tiptoeing through the walker tulips, there’s this split second where carol spots a machine gun, and looks at maggie with a face like, “can i plzzzz, i am mad horny for that machine gun,” but maggie tells her no. (i 110% expected her to defy orders and accidentally wake up all the walkers, but she actually behaved herself for once. well. mostly)
never fear, tho, after the girl gang collects a bunch of MREs they go back to wait for the dudes waiting up top to pull them up, and bc men ruin everything, one of the ropes break, and daryl catches it before it falls, but then a slow motion drop of blood falls on a walker’s face, and just like that, walker naptime is over, and carol uses her bow and arrow for two seconds before she is like “fuck this” and whips out the machine gun
yes, she is super hot using it
yes, daryl watches her do it
anyway, all the other girls get rescued, and carol is about to be pulled up, but bc she is a #girlboss, she first makes a beeline for one more crate full of MREs. daryl covers her while she gets the loot, and when she gets back up top they have another charged moment as carol hands him back his knife
just fuck already, jfc
titles!
cut to alexandria where everything is still not smilestimes
BUT, we do get to see uncle daryl run and hug rj and judith (and dog), and FUCKING HERSHEL JR, LIGHT OF MY LIFE is also there
istg, they could not have casted a better child, i a d o r e him
oh, and some friends of maggie’s show up too, idk
cut to a staff meeting where everyone is like, whomp whomp, we’re all gonna starve to death unless we figure out something quick
cue maggie going, “oh, i know where food is, but it requires me to tell you my tragic backstory, in case anyone didn’t watch my bottle episode”
she tells her dramatic backstory about all her friends getting slaughtered by the reapers for no apparent reason, and then she’s like “anyway, let’s go back there!”
no one thinks it’s a great idea, but a group of people decide to go anyway, including daryl and gabriel. rosita is super pissed that gabriel is going, and carol doesn’t go, probably partly bc it’s a shitty fucking idea, and also bc they have to keep caryl apart bc otherwise they’ll fix their problems ahead of schedule and they won’t be able to drag out the needless angst
daryl looks kind of annoyed that carol doesn’t volunteer to go
bitch, i thought you wanted her to stop putting herself in the line of fire! make up your damn mind!
moving on
cut to a thunderstorm, where, if you look closely, you’ll notice daryl is wearing the STUPIDEST hat i’ve ever seen. just get an umbrella, jfc
for some reason negan is with them, bc ig he knows his way around washington dc, and no one in six years has bothered to figure out how to get around the city and/or get a map, and he is like “hey guys, maybe we shouldn’t try to walk in this fucking hurricane,” and everyone is like “FUCK YOU NEGAN, YOU’RE NOT THE BOSS OF US!!!”
this will be a common occurrence
but eventually daryl is even like “actually, it’s rly unpleasant out here, and my hat is mad stupid, can we go inside plz?”
so they go inside an old metro station, which is actually a rly cool cinematic choice. i rly like the idea, and they executed it rly well
speaking of executions
there are some fucking RULL CREEPY walkers. idk why they bothered me so badly, but they were what they at first assumed were corpses wrapped up in tarps, but turns out none of them had been properly put down, so they go through killing these rotted bodies that had supposedly been there since The Fall, and it’s very gross and cool
this entire time, btw, negan is like “hey, i know i’m a shitty person, but i have some rational arguments about why we shouldn’t be doing this right now,” and everyone is like, “FUCK YOU NEGAN, YOU’RE NOT THE BOSS OF US!!!” and he’s just like “god fucking damnit”
(i forgot to mention that at one point, when they’re headed into the metro station, negan is trying to warn ppl of the potential danger, and everyone is ignoring him, and he tries to talk to daryl, and daryl is like “fuck you, you think we’re BUDDIES?” and negan is like “oh, ok, so you’re gonna be like that too? fanfreakingtastic” and it’s very funny)
anyway. a fat monster zombie escapes its tarp at one point, and tries to eat some npc, and negan saves him, again is like “hey, anyone else realize that this is a FUCKING BAD PLAN?”, and everyone is like “we don’t care, you’re still shitty and we’re not listening to you, and you don’t actually care about random npc i would literally not be able to pick out in a lineup bc his face is so generic, you’re not the boss of us!!!”
it’s at this point that negan finally is like, “why am i even here? bc i know how to get around washington dc? do none of you have a map?” and i was like, “right?! that’s what i said!”
it’s then revealed that maggie only brought negan along to murder him under the guise of “oops, he got hurt in the line of duty, it wasn’t my fault,” and daryl has this look on his face that says, “i seriously need to stop hanging out with lethal women bent on revenge bc it’s gonna give me high blood pressure,” and maggie has a badass moment where she points a gun she has for some reason at negan and is like “i have like, one shred of human compassion left inside of me, and if you keep pushing me i will fucking kill you without a second thought, so shut the hell up”
(in her defense, negan had just dropped glenn’s name to purposely antagonize her, which was rude as hell)
(for the record, i’m completely on maggie’s side here, but negan still is right that trapping themselves in a metro station is a bad call)
anyway, moving away from that briefly
i think this jump cut happens sooner, i don’t actually remember, but whatever who cares, point is, we get to the part of the show that actually matters, and that’s anything involving my love, juanita “princess” sanchez
and also eugene, yumiko, and ezekiel
they are being asked increasingly invasive questions by commonwealth ppl, some of which i wish they actually would of answered (what do they use to wipe their asses with?? surely toilet paper has long since become extinct)
zeke, who is so much more tolerable as a character now that he’s not larping as a king, has this incredibly weird and sort of sexually charged moment with a dude in an orange stormtrooper costume, where he’s like, “i bet you were an asshole cop back before The Fall, you stupid fascist, #fuckthepolice, mb literally? idk, this moment has a lot of pent up aggression that could easily translate to hate sex, it might just be the intense eye contact, but w/e, let’s just move along,” and then he has a coughing fit to remind the audience that he’s currently dying of cancer, and orange stormtrooper is like “lolz, loser, drink some water you dumb piece of shit”
cut to the wholesome foursome sitting at a picnic table in a guarded courtyard eating gruel, and yumkio, who finally has a personality, and princess are like “hey, this place fucking sucks, can we leave?” and zeke is like, “yeah, i met this orange stormtrooper who i think might be dtf and/or murder, so we should probably bounce”
but eugene is like, “but i want some hot stephanie ass, and also some bullshit excuse about how mb commonewealth will save alexandria” which, they left before things went super downhill, right? idr. it was after hilltop fell, but they don’t know alexandria got fucked either, if i recall? w/e, not important
two seconds after he says this, they talk to some people who are like “we’ve been here for four months, or maybe it’s been nine, i don’t actually remember, i’ve stopped processing the passage of time,” and the wholesome foursome takes this as a bad sign, tho that’s just the life i’ve lived as a night worker during a pandemic, so i was like #mood
but then they watch some guy get dragged away screaming to get “reprocessed” and eugene is like “ok, nvm, let’s bounce”
(my theory on what “reprocessing” is, is that they’re stuck in a room and have to watch hours and hours of customer service training videos on vhs from the 90s)
i definitely got my jump cut scenes mixed up bc i think the negan accusing maggie of a murder plot thing happened in between this scene and then the next commonwealth scene, but w/e, i’ll just finish what happens in the commonwealth arch
the wholesome foursome are trying to hatch a plan to escape, except princess, my love, is distracted watching some stormtroopers flirt, and the other three are like “wtf, dude, how can you even tell any of them apart?” and princess then tells them every stormtroopers backstory bc she is brilliant and pays rly close attention to shit, and the other three are like, “this is useful information, thank you for being an insane person”
their plan involves yumiko and eugene dressing up as stormtroopers and leading princess and zeke out of the place, which works fine actually, except on their way out they come across the Depressing Wall of Probably Mostly Dead Missing Loved Ones
they’re about to leave, when princess is like, “wait, yumiko, you’re on here, that’s weird huh?”
sure enough, yumiko is on the wall, with a note from ig her sister
the scene ends with yumiko going, “guys...i can’t leave...i have tragic backstory to unveil”
tragic backstory to be continued ig
back in murder metro town, npc and some other npc have stolen all the supplies, there’s a train blocking the track, and a horde of walkers are coming towards them, so things are not going fantastic
they horde is too big to take down, so they start to climb on top of the train car to get away
but dog runs away!
and daryl, being every pet owner ever, is like “gotta go get my dog, guys, try not to get killed while i’m gone, c u soon!” and he ducks under the train and disappears
#priorities
the episode ends with maggie climbing up the train car but getting grabbed by a walker and dangling off the edge, and negan is there and they have a lion king moment where maggie is like, “scar! help me!” and negan is like “long live the king, bitch” and walks away into the shadows, leaving maggie to a potential death
which, while i know isn’t actually going to happen, would be a really fucking funny move on the writers’ part
like, “look, lauren’s back! and now she’s dead, bet you didn’t expect that!”
anyway
my assumption is negan will actually end up helping her up or something, continuing his ambiguous morality bullshit that actually isn’t ambiguous bc he BEAT GLENN TO DEATH WITH A FUCKING BAT WRAPPED IN BARBED WIRE IN FRONT OF HIS PREGNANT WIFE
the maggie/negan arch is kind of dumb, but whatevs, i’ll tolerate it, as long as my boy glenn gets justice in the end
anyway, cue credits!
final assessment: good episode. i’m much more interested in commonwealth than the reapers, tho i am hoping that daryl’s personality-less ex turns out to be a monster killing machine with no conscience, that’ll be fun. princess is a gift from god. hershel jr needs his own tv show. needs more carol (and caryl)
the end! going back into my walking dead free chamber! see you next episode!
-diz
#i didn't mean to recap the entire fucking episode lol#sorry#it's to make up for my lack of content lately#or something#anyway#caryl#twd s11ep1#twd s11 spoilers#dunlap tp
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Thought I’d share some of my favourite wlw movies, please feel free to add your own favourites and i’ll reblog them!!! Lets share the gay.
But i’m a cheerleader (1999)
This crazy satirical comedy is, as mentioned, a satirical comedy, but between the laughs it makes many comments on the ridiculousness of the society, the dangers of conversion therapy and the importance of accepting yourself. Natasha Lyonne and Clea DuVall play girlfriends that meet at conversion camp and RuPaul plays a camp leader with a “straight is great” shirt. What else do you need?
D.E.B.S. (2004)
This is the early 2000s bad but amazing queer comedy that i always wanted but took me way too long to find. D.E.B.S. is a clandestine paramilitary academy for girls that are recruited through a secret test in the SAT - they basically wear ridiculous outfits and live in a sorority house while working as spies for the US government. The star student finds herself in a romance with the number one bad guy, who in fact is not a guy but a girl played by Jordana Brewster. The movie is directed, written, edited and produced by women so extra points for that.
Children’s Hour (1961)
Two friends open a private school for girls and get accused of having an affair, which leads to parents taking their children away from the school and the women becoming societal outcasts. In the end the other woman admits to herself and to her friend that she in fact does have feelings for her friend. The movie does have an extremely tragic end (as all wlw themed movies in that time had to have), but works as a strong reminder of how far we’ve come, both in the society and in wlw movies.
The Miseducation of Cameron Post (2018)
Set in the 90s, this movie shows how destructive conversion camps were, and still are. This movie is absolutely beautiful, my only critisism being that a disabled person is not played by a disabled person. Chloe Grace Moretz also got a lot of critique for playing a queer character, but SURPRISE she is queer and we all just assumed she wasn’t. Her queerness shouldn’t be a surprise to anyone after watching this movie tho, as she is convincing (and hot) as hell.
Imagine Me and You (2005)
The bride falls in love with the florist of her straight wedding. Cheating happens in this movie, but it’s actually handled very well and the husband is the most sympathetic man in wlw movie history. This movie is one of my all time favourites, it’s warm, cute, funny and very English. Also Lena Headey.
Mädchen in uniform (1958)
Set in the 1910s Germany, the movie is about an all girls strict boarding school in which almost everyone is in love with one of the teachers, Miss von Bernburg. The new student (played by the absolutely gorgeous Romy Schneider) falls especially deep for the teacher, declaring her love multiple times and even kissing her. The movie does not have the happiest of endings, but no one dies which was, i guess, progress.
Kyss mig/With every heartbeat (2011)
This beautiful Swedish movie takes the whole cheating thing to a new level, but it’s one of the most beautifully shot wlw movies with some of the most gorgeous shots in movie history. Many have probably seen some of the scenes of this movie on youtube, but i highly recommend watching the whole thing, as it has a great storyline and spoiler aller, a happy ending.
The world unseen (2007)
This movie is set in the 1950s South Africa during the apartheid, tackling racism, classism, sexism and homofobia all at once. It follows the love story Amina and Miriam, one of which is actively challenging the laws and regulations while the latter is scared to make any demands and follows all conventions. This movie has an almost exclusively POC cast and gives an interesting (even though depressing) glimpse at a place and time that deserves all the screen time it can get.
Anatomy of a love seen (2014)
Two actresses fall in love while playing a couple in a movie, break up in real life, and are called back to reshoot a love scene. This movie is very raw, full of feelings, great sex scenes and good chemistry. It does feel a bit like fanfiction coming to life, which i fully say as a positive thing. Maybe don’t watch this movie if you’ve just broken up, or just go for it if you feel like crying your eyes out.
Saving face (2004)
A surgeon and a dancer fall in love in New York, having to deal with the expectations and prejudges of their Chinese-American families. The early 2000s really knew how to make romcoms, since this movie has rightfully claimed its place as one of the classics.
Tumblr won’t let me add more than 10 pictures, so i’ll start with these! Please add your own, or send me your entries and i’ll add them as a reblog :)
#i know im missing some obv ones like carol#sorryyy#couldnt fit them all#wlw#wlw movies#lesbian movies#queer movies#imagine me and you#but i'm a cheerleader#mädchen in uniform#the miseducation of cameron post#debs#d.e.b.s#saving face#the anatomy of a love seen#the world unseen#kyss mig#children's hour
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New Paracosm AU: Big Hero Beau
@decaykid yes, kind of...
Okay, like I said in my last post this idea came to me after listening to Fist Pump and Viva Namida on loop with pacing.
So you know like how the original Humble Pie paracosm is very western horror kind of drama, yeah? well, this paracosm is just full on ANIME BBY!!! I'm talking Space Dandy, I'm talkin' Gurren Lagann, I'm talkin maybe a little bit of Trigun, and also takes alot from action rpgs like Bayonetta, Devil May Cry, Persona, Viewitful Joe, and Wonderful 101 (but its like only two people), and takes alot from Sonic the hedgehog (mostly Sonic Underground, Sonic Adventure 2, and Sonic Forces), and little bit from Fancy Pants ( that's not an anime or a "real" video game, its just an old flash game I used to hyperfixate on).
This paracosm is completely different which is why I gave it, it's own name instead of just adjective then "!"
This version of Beau takes a lot of inspiration from Dandy ( Space Dandy), Vash The Stampede (Trigun), Sonic The Hedgehog (Sonic The Hedgehog), and Kamina (Gurren Langann)
In this paracosm, both of Beau's parents perished in a tragic accident, Beau takes his siblings to an abandoned shack and they hide out and live out there. the tragedy this motivative Beau to become stronger and a hero, not only to keep his siblings safe but others too. The last thing his mom told him was that his smile could save a thousand lives, so because of that he always keeps an upbeat, go get 'em attitude, and he doesn't want to bum his younger siblings out. His mom also gave Beau her heart shape locket before she passed on, so Beau has worn it ever since that day.
The locket is very precious to him, he doesn't let anyone touch it (other than his siblings), and if he loses it he'll go into a panic attack and can't do anything else until he finds it again.
Dev, Beau's little brother, also wants to be strong and a hero, he tries to train like his brother but he can't keep up. Beau tells Dev that he has to be strong in his own way, so Dev decides to put his tech skills to good use and make his older brother cool weapons for him to use. I forgot to mention in this paracosm some people are born with superpowers and such, and Beau's superpowers are super strength and speed, while Dev's superpower is super intelligence.
Dev can't keep up with his brother on foot, so he made himself a jetpack to keep up, and makes science weapons for himself to use.
In this paracosm, there are evil robots, pirates, bandits, ninjas, demons, fallen angels, giant spiders, bad guys who kidnap pretty people, any enemy you would find in a video game or anime yeah it's probably here. So, there's always something for Beau and Dev to fight or someone to save from something.
Beau and Dev don't have secret identities since superpowered people are common but they get to have a pretty rad transformation scene activate when they fist bump each other.
Beau fighting style is similar to that of a hack and slack fighting game, Beau mostly use his fists to fight and his speed, he'll also use guns too, but he'll only use swords if he thinks he can pull off a cool move, since not really experience using them that much. Dev made Beau special gloves and boots that make the attack range of his hit larger so its easier to take out hoards of stuff like robots (which happens lot) and big enemies like giant monsters.
His boots are also guns so its like....
Oh, and Beau also makes sure that he always looks cool when fighting just in case someone takes a pic (which happens alot). Unlike Bayonetta, Beau is more playful with his posing rather than sexy.
Dev's wits come in handy when the two come across puzzles, riddles, or finding a way out of traps on their adventures since Beau didn't complete school once his parents passed and mostly focus on raising his siblings and hero training.
Much like Sonic, Beau is very snarky and witty while fighting his enemies (or at least tries to be), he always tries to make a snarky comment or a really cool zinger before finishing off his enemy. Due to his kind of being not the sharpest tool in the shed, it can take a while for him to come up with a good zinger, so it kind of stalls fights, and sometimes it gets to the point where the enemy is just like "Oh my GOD! just KILL ME!", this also annoys and embarrasses Dev too at times.
Beau makes money from bounties and doing odd jobs around, he makes enough for his siblings to live comfortably, but there are times where he'll go hungry because he only has enough for Dev and Carrie to eat. Beau is still a kind of a lower-level hero compare to the other well know ones around.
Dev has also made a rocket ship so they can fight intergalactically on other planets
Carrie in this paracosm is still 4 years old, she has yet to show any signs of having powers, which is pretty normal for her age since people in this world don't show powers until they hit their pre-teen years.
Beau will take Carrie on their adventures if it's safe enough, but if the mission is too dangerous Beau will take her to the nearest daycare or the nearest trustworthy femme person. Beau will try to make the mission or fight end quickly as possible if he left Carrie with a stranger, there's a sigh of relief once he finds her safe, if not (which doesn't happen a lot thankfully), well somebody gonna die and Beau tries to make it up to her by spending the next few days with her, just him and Carrie.
Beau tries to put being a good guardian/older brother before being a hero and tries his best to spend as much time with Carrie and Dev as possible on chiller/lower stakes days.
Beau had never had time to really process the feeling of losing his parents, there are days where he feels down but he never lets it show around his siblings or have it affect his hero work. There are nights where those memories keep him up, sometimes he'll cry but still try to smile thru the tears.
Beau likes to give peps talks to himself in the mirror, and pep talks to Dev, when he's feeling discouraged, although most of the time those pep talks don't really make any sense Dev still appreciate his brother's kind words.
Since Beau saves people, he interacts a lot with damsels in distress, he flirts with them, but usually gets rejected for coming across as too cheesy or cocky. He doesn't really mind it tho, he actually finds it funny, but when a lady actually flirts back he gets really flustered and has to leave immediately. Despite this Beau still tries to give Dev advice on talking to girls.
Beau still smokes and drinks because the stress of having to raise young siblings, dealing with trauma, and being a hero can be alot, but he still makes sure his siblings don't see him and he doesn't get too wasted.
Other than hero stuff, Hero! Beau enjoys reading comics, parkour, skateboarding, break dancing (which he incorporates in his fighting for some really cool finishers), practicing cool poses and phrases, playing video games with his little brother, and watching barbie movies with his little sisters (since Barbie reminds him of his mom).
Oof, I think that's all I got for now....
TL;DL Basically if this version of Beau is Sonic the original Beau is more like Shadow if that makes any sense.
#paraportal#new paracosm#paracosm#paracosm: big hero beau#para: hero! beau#I still have yet to figure out how Bonnie fits into this paracosm#their dynamic is gonna be more of a 'two stupid dorks' kind of dynamic#I dont think this paracosm could get anymore anime than this#maybe I'll make bonnie a magical girl#idk would that be too much
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Catch me not having a clue who any of these gods(?) and people are, but still sitting here like, "I ship that pretty one with the gruff one, and that brown haired one with the other(?) gruff one?" without knowing names or what this is except the fanart I see you reblog, because this fandom apparently has lots of nice art
Fam i have no idea what ur talking about or when u sent this im so sorry asfkjhfkjhf but i thiiiinnnkkkk??????? it’s “Heavens Official Blessing” or Tiān Guān Cì Fú (TGCF for tagging stuff) its originally a chinese gay novel that is soooooooo long by the author Mo Xiang Tong Xiu (MXTX) who wrote 2 (two?????) other novels that I know of that are also gay historical fantasy but i personally havent actually read TGCF???? im just watching the anime and looking at the wiki and reading fanfics so i have a vague idea whats going on but not really???? so i cant really give a good review BUT i LOVE THE CHARACTERS MXTX WRITES SO MUCH AFHAFKFHKFAKF IM SO SORRY IM SHIT WITH TAGGING SO U HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IM HYPER FIXATING ON BUT
LISTEN
LISTEN
LISTEN
Pretty one and the gruff one im THINKING is He Xuan (or Ming Yi/ Ming-Xiong/Ming Bro) for the grumpy one and Shi Qingxuan for the pretty one and both are kinda gender fluid?? (more Shi Qingxuan but they both change their forms to be both women and men which is Iconic and the anime put her in the TRANS FLAG COLOUR instead of her canon white and green which is ICONIC) AND THHEYRE SO TRAGIC AND HOT AND I CRY JUST THINKING ABOUT THEIR STORY LIKE AFHDFKJAFDSGS like i want to kinda read the book just for them, the two super minor characters, but i also read somewhere that their story doesn’t really have a clean ending so im also holding back from just getting Emotionally Hurt because im a cancer and i know it’ll wreck me
I think The Two Gruff Idiots are Feng Xin (dark haired gruff boy) and Mu Qing (brown haired gruff boy) and theyre both martial gods and both knew each other for over 800 years and both tried to take care of Actual Human And Heavenly Disaster Xie Lian, failed, and tried to do it again 800 years later but with stupid glasses with moustaches in hopes that Xie Lian cant figure out that they care about him but OOPS Xie Lian does in fact have the braincell of the three of them fajfafjajf
Heres the link to watch the anime, there are 11 eps rn but it updates every weekend (I dont actually know when but i watch it on sundays) Make sure u have ur ad block on tho lol there is a manga too and the art style is TO DIE FOR like its GORGEOUS but its roughly at the same pace as the anime so eh
Heres where to read the whole thing online, just a warning its BIG AS FUCK like 244? plus extras I think??
I’d also recommend MXTX’s other books!
Mo Dao Zu Shi (or Grandmaster of Demonic Cultivation/ The Untamed/MDZS) is both a Book as well as an Anime (the whole thing is on youtube) , a Live Action which you can watch on Netflix (look up Untamed, also a warning, the plot is a little different from the book and anime cause of uhhh censorship?? also i guess to make it more live drama friendly, my friends an i binged it and really liked it, but some of the fandom doesn’t), a manga which is not finished I think???? idk im not caught up, and a fucking chinese AUDIO DRAMA LIKE BITCH ITS SO WELL DONE but i have to stop listening sometimes cause like there is a difference between watching/reading characters kiss, and then like just hearing them, i get so embarrassed i have to skip the kissing scenes and god forbid i accidentally click on the smutty extras alfjajlfjalfjaljf u can find it on youtube, i linked the one i listen to but i havent finished it and i don’t think it’s all of it, but you can find other episodes/chapters easily
Its about 1 Dumb Yet So Smart gay/bi man (Wei Wuxian) who honestly tries his fucking best, fucks up everything, dies for over a decade, and then is forcefully brought back to life to solve a murder mystery with the guy who has been in Super Gay Love with him since they were teens (Lan Zhan), a bunch of teens Who Are Just Honestly Here For A Good Time And Yet (Lan Juniors, Jin Ling, and Best Boy Ouyang Zizhen ) while badly hiding his real identity from all the people he knows, including his foster brother (Jiang Cheng) who is out for blood and hunting his ass down with a whip and also Lan Zhan who is travelling with him. Also the Killer. There is a killer on the loose and is willing to murder whoever to keep their secrets. Also Nie Huaisang. I adore him and his brother Nie Mingjue, if there is one bitch u gotta remember from this summary it’s this little twink (he and his brother also have a fucking spin off movie from the live action drama THAT I HAVENT BEEN ABLE TO FIND A ENGLISH SUB VERSION AND ITS BEEN KILLING ME SINCE I STARTED WATCHING THIS SHOW LAST YEAR. GOOGLE GIVE ME MY FAVOURITE TWINK AND HIS BEAR OF A BROTHER HAVING A FUN FAMILY ROAD TRIP!!!!!!!)
My Personal Current Favourite is Scum Villain’s Self Saving System (SVSSS) which is SOOOOOOO FUNNY Like it’s not as popular cause the comic was discontinued, and the anime looks like its from 2005 with the weird 3D animation but its my current comfort media!!!
Its basically about a spite reading millennial (Shen Yuan) who died after reading a REALLY awful popular cheesy smut harem novel (think like 50 shade series but worse cause the protag had 600 wives) and was forced into the body of a minor but important villain (the protagonist’s teacher, Shen Qingqiu) from the novel who was fated to die with all his limbs cut off and his eyes and tongue plucked out and is told he has to fix the story so its not trash, he reasonably freaks the fuck out and hugs the protagonists (Luo Binghe) thigh so hard he turns him gay without realizing. Sadly, he does have to make sure certain plot points happen, which fucks him over a lot, and he thinks Luo Binghe still wants to kill him instead of love him cause he has the Emotional Intelligence of a Rock, but its so funny reading about him handling all the awful tropey stuff, like imagine u have to be a character in My Immortal But With Porn?????? without breaking out of character too much?? I wouldn’t be able to handle it ajhakfkfhjfj He also finds out that he’s not the only transmigrator in the novel either, but it doesn’t matter cause theyre both So Fucking Stupid Collectively but everyone would honestly die for the both of them
warning for this story though, the main relationship is a teacher/student relationship, but nothing happens until the student is in his 20s and also kinda not his student anymore cause he’s running hell??? but if that squicks u out i totally understand and offer you to PLEASE still enjoy some of this media, and instead of the BingQiu ship, I offer you the LiuQiu one, where both me and the main character cry over how a beautiful man/fellow immortal lord loves the main character so much that he literally fought every day for 5 years to be by his side and I Think Thats Beautiful and I kinda like this ship more than the main one tbh PLEASE just look at the art for Liu Qingge because i love him so much, he’s like if you took Lan Zhan and Jiang Cheng from MDZS and mashed them into one beautiful man the author is trying to tell me is straight but u take one look at him And Tell Me Otherwise
#anon#answering asks probably really late but i live on mobile and i dont get notifications a lot#FHAKJAKFJFAFJA SORRY FOR INFO DUMPING ON U ANON BUT PLEASE LOVE THESE#I LOVE THESE#AND MY IRL FRIENDS DONT CARE ABOUT THEM#theyre like yeah amber ill watch the drama and maybe an anime but its ok no we dont want u to keep sending us tikoks its ok#LIKE IM WEEPING PLEASE ENJOY THIS CONTENT!!!!!!!#but for real if u want a love story for the ages read TGCF i've heard its really good#SVSSS is like the less serious and shortest novel of the three but so good#and MDZS is like the most popular successful middle child that every and their mother has seen and enjoyed#MDZS#SVSSS#TGCF#MXTX#also im once again sorry about how i never tag anything im just convinced no one actually goes on my blog#but i'm always surprised when i get asks like this asking me to tag things or asking about a thing im enjoying#and therefore flooding their dashs with lol#Anonymous
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animorphssss.....2!
ok one L abt reading the series on my ereader is that the flipbook illustrations arent there ;_; those were my favvvvv
anyways I love animorphs still
I feel like I'll end up repeating myself a lot during these little liveblogs lmao but mannnn it’s so good. its so hardcore. like I know that that’s the whole Thing but I still get shocked by some of the stuff that happens
like a big theme in the series centers around the morality of killing your enemies - and it’s so all over the place bc in book 6 you have jake boiling a bunch of yeerks alive, which is kinda gnarly if you think abt it, but the alternative would be to leave them there and let them infest people soo...? and that’s basically the point, that there are never any easy choices in war
also I went on the animorphs wiki to look at trivia bc I love doing that and I cant BELIEVE (some of) the books were reissued in 2011 and they changed/removed some of the references to be more ‘modern’ omfg....talk about erasing 90s culture smh
likeeee I was born in 97 so I didn't exactly grow up in the 90s and therefore some of the references go over my head but its so charming and fun to have them there! and it makes sense given that the books are SET in the 90s
I don't remember ever being confused by any of the references as a kid (tho for sure a lot of them went over my head), but then again I read the books in like 2008 sooo
also some of the stuff that they change - like changing ‘recorded w/a vcr’ to ‘recorded w/the TV’ or ‘floppy disc’ to ‘flash drive’ may make more sense to modern audiences, but doesn't make sense in the context of the story still being set in the 90s
tho it is funny that the books use the phrase ‘hook up’ to mean ‘meet up’ a lot bc that is a phrase that definitely has a different meaning nowadays
alsooooo as it turns out I'm p sure I only read a couple of the spinoffs - the hork-bajir chronicles and the ellimist chronicles (which was confusing lmao), bc my library didn’t have the others :( 2007/2008 woes....
but now I get to read the spinoffs woooooooo so I read the first megamorphs and the andalite chronicles
I'm reading them in the chronological order (I think?) which is good bc part of the problem was that I read the ellimist book at a completely weird time and it confused me more lmao
megamorphs 1 basically felt like a regular animorphs book except longer, but the plot didn't feel like it needed all that extra page space tbh? even so it was an entertaining adventure
and rachel having amnesia was great, amnesia is one of my fav tropes lmao. and it was a lot of fun here, though a bit underutilized
another favorite trope of mine is time travel, so I'm gonna have a really fun time here w/that
as for the andalite chronicles, I really enjoyed that one. I thought it was a well done story about the horrors of war (which is a theme animorphs does excellently), kind of similar to the overarching story of the whole series, but fit into one book without feeling rushed
the way the story starts out with elfangor wanting to be a hero, not understanding what that entails, to the end where he IS going to be a hero, and he knows now that this is a burden rather than a reward
the horror elements are also really strong, with the taxxon morph being horrifying of course
and mannnn I loved that we got to see more of the taxxons as a species, and see that not all taxxons submitted to the yeerks - which breaks the previous theme of ‘all the taxxons are evil just because’
this book also establishes that the taxxons gave themselves over to the yeerks due to their constant hunger being unbearable, so it isn’t just that they’re evil for fun
animorphs does such an excellent job showing that each ‘side’ of a war will have good and bad (or at least sympathetic and unsympathetic) people
also loren was awesome, what a cool character. though I didn't realize she was literally like 13 until the very end of the book, holy shit. that's crazy. i thought she was 16 at the youngest....geez. her throwing a rock at visser 3 is even more iconic knowing she's a middle schooler at the time
and chapman was here! I'm assuming this must be the same chapman as the assistant principal controller... I thought it was a little strange to put chapman in that role, bc in this book he was a huge asshole basically the entire time, but in the previous (’future’) book it was revealed that he became a controller willingly only to spare his daughter, which is pretty far from this book where he’s actively trying to sell humanity out to the yeerks...people change I guess? (also he got his memory erased so I guess there's that)
alloran was a really interesting character. horrors of war again - we hear from his old buddy that he used to be a fun, witty guy, but war changed him into somebody who would do horrible things
and him becoming a controller was horrifying, obviously, but I like that alloran wasn't portrayed as some perfect, holy guy in order to make it all the more tragic when he got infested. its already fucked up enough as it is, and making him flawed was a lot more meaningful
and him wanting to flush all the yeerks out into space....oooooof the (later) parallels hurt
plus the fact that elfangor refusing to commit genocide against the helpless yeerks (even though they’re the enemy) directly contributing to alloran becoming a controller.....oof. I love that it shows that even making the morally correct decisions during war can lead to awful things happening, but not in a way that endorses evil actions - the story isn’t saying that elfangor should have killed the yeerks, it’s saying that there are no good choices in war
arbron being trapped as a taxxon was fucked up. but also really intriguing, especially how he found purpose and led a free taxxon uprising. I don't remember if we hear from him/the free taxxons again but I hope so
also the plot twist of tobias being elfangors SON...bruh. I do remember that despite not having read this book so it must come up in the main story later but my memory of that is vauge so I’m excited to see how that plays out. it’s always gonna be hilarious to me that ax is technically tobias’s uncle
and then the ellimist drops in and wacks up the time stream even more. classic. I love the crazy time travel stuff in animorphs
omfg and the bits where elfangor is a human tech guy and talked about his friends bill and steve LMAOOOOO
also the scene where elfangor drives the yellow mustang while blasting '(I cant get no) satisfaction’ by the rolling stones was one of the most iconic things I've ever read
basically I loved all the angles of war fucking people up. from loren’s dad, to alloran, to elfangor himself learning about the true horrors of war...v well done imo
ok back to the main series - so my pick for the most fucked up scene SO FAR (in my own personal opinion) - the scene where they're in the jungle and rachel passes out in bear morph and a bunch of rainforest ants start EATING HER ALIVE and like crawling into her ears and mouth and HGGGGGG that was genuinely so fucking disturbing
its a good thing that the time travel made it so rachel couldn't remember that bc that was fuuuuucked
another contender is a scene we don't actually see - erek having his capacity for violence instated and then slaughtering a ton of human and hork-bajir controllers
like damn, you know its fucked up when its too fucked up for ANIMORPHS to even ‘show.’ this is a series that doesn't pull punches but evidentially that would've been Too Much to actually portray (understandably). also i feel like seeing the aftermath/everyone’s reactions had more of an impact than describing erek killing a bunch of people would have
also I forgot that marco Literally Fucking Dies during that scene and that's why he doesn't get to see the slaughter. wow
and then in the very next book JAKE dies too. jesus
oh it was also so sad and fucked up when marco’s dad told him that he and his wife used to fight sometimes, but then all of a sudden they stopped fighting, and their relationship was basically entirely peaceful and perfect - and this is how marco knows exactly when his mom was made into a controller, bc of course a yeerk wouldn't care enough to get into petty arguments like that....ooooof
Okay and book 15 really got me...that was fucking heavy man. Geeeez. Everything w/Marco and his mom is so fucked uppppp
Like he literally has to deal with so much awful traumatizing shit. The scene where he pretends to be a controller and is face to face w/visser one and THAT HIS MOM but he can’t even do anything, and he just sees the evil in her eyes and thinks about how there’s no way she had been controlled by a yeerk that long before bc he’s never seen her look like that...that was so fucking sad.
Plus Marcos mom now thinking that Marco is a controller...aughh...and then later Marco knows he can’t even think-speak to her bc he’ll just talk about everything he’s wanted to talk about to his mom this whole time... ;_;
And the parts where Marcos humor slips and the utter rage he feels towards the situation comes through...man
Plus everything about him being understandably afraid of sharks after being nearly torn in half by one back during their first dolphin adventure
Augh oh and jake telling Marco that everyone can tell something is up bc Marco isn’t joking around and talking about how insane their plan is like usual, so Marco fakes it sand does all that even tho he’s terrified and conflicted...aughhhh
Ok and the last scene where Marco is thinking about a future where he and his parents can talk plainly about how awful and traumatizing everything is, and then eventually they’ll feel okay enough to joke about it, bc Marcos mom is the one who taught him to look at the funny side of life...Oh The Pain
There were a lot of great fucked up individual lines in this book too. I’m just so sad about these poor middle schoolers jfc
Also I do distinctly remember the scene where they collapse the shark tank at Ocean World or w/e, it was weird af reading it bc I remembered none of the rest of the book but got weird deja vu reading that scene and remembering having read it like 13+ years ago
if it’s not clear by now I have a pretty terrible memory for media which is honestly good bc then I can reread things and it’s like new
Also jake...man...I said it previously but I was kinda eh about jake when I first read these bc he’s kinda the ‘basic’ character, but now I find his story much more interesting
His conflict over being leader is really good. KAA does a fantastic job capturing the pressure he’s under bc he was chosen by his friends to be the leader, so he REALLY can’t back out, and he doesn’t necessarily feel up to it, but feels he has no choice in the matter...
And constantly having to make really difficult decisions that could get his friends killed...geez. It’s so much pressure. And he talks about wanting to go back to being a normal kid when this is all over, and it kinda strikes me as him being in denial - like, there’s no way things can ever be ‘normal’ again, but that’s his way of coping.
Especially with Tom and all that. That conflict is so compelling...jake having to play all these different roles - as leader, as a son/student, as a regular brother to Tom - he’s constantly having to act a certain way and rarely gets to be Himself
It’s actually kinda relatable in a way - that feeling of being In Charge, but in a somewhat abstract and informal way, so you feel like regular old you, but you have to carefully regulate how you act bc the people around you expect a certain standard of behavior from you...
And all the morally grey situations they’re put in are fucked up, but especially for jake who has the final say on what they do, even when knowing it could lead to his friends being killed or made into controllers
Like in the book with the cannibal yeerk guy - there’s basically no good choices there. Jake lets the cannibal live, and (at first) implies that it’s for the best that he’s cannibalizing other yeerks and therefore helping get rid of some yeerks - except that he kills their hosts too
but the alternative would be to directly kill another human being who isn't actively fighting/resisting you, which is a fucked up thing for a middle schooler to have to do
And the conflict between jake and Cassie is really excellent bc jake has to make these awful decisions, and Cassie is the type of person who can’t stand that sort of thing, so it gets left up to jake a lot, but then she’s upset with jake for doing something awful, even while knowing that there were no better options
like, her asking jake to kill the cannibal guy for her was really fucked up, but also entirely understandable for cassie as a character to ask. it was an emotionally charged situation, and cassie is an emotional person. she’s also somebody who like to Act, to do concrete good, and getting rid of an Evil Bad Guy in front of her would be a definite action
But Cassie is a great source of morality to the group - most of them are pretty jaded, but Cassie is able to hope in a way none of the rest are. It creates a really compelling dynamic between jake and Cassie that I kinda dismissed when I was like 10 or w/e
Also the scene where jake as a fly gets crushed and starts dying? Seriously fucked. And then after when he’s nearly breaking down in the airport and Cassie comforts him...that was a really good scene. Cassie is so good
And the continuity is so excellent - I love how in book 17, Cassie (and jake to an extent) doesn’t really weigh in on the moral debate abt the oatmeal bc she’s still shaken up by asking jake to murder a guy for her, and then (presumably) going ahead and lighting his house on fire when jake doesn’t kill him
And augh jake and Marco have such a good and interesting dynamic - the entire group kinda pushes each other into their respective ‘roles’ in the group, but for a few books that’s really true for jake and marco
I don't remember what book it was but at some point marco (I think) mentions that jake understands what marco is dealing with w/his mom being a controller bc of tom, but that they don’t talk about it bc they ‘don't talk about stuff like that’ or something and I'm just like noooo talk to each other :(
but at this point jake feels like he can’t really express doubt and fear and stuff like that bc he’s the Leader and they look to him to be strong (which is ironically very similar to how rachel feels), and marco feels like he can’t be serious bc he’s the funny guy.
Basically I love all the different dynamics in the group. How Cassie and Rachel are such opposites but are best friends and get along well, while Marco and Cassie are more directly opposed - as jake says, Marco is ruthless, and Cassie definitely isn’t. Rachel and Marco are also pretty different which is interesting, bc they have a lot in common, and actually agree on a lot (even if they disagree out loud) but their commonalities combined with their circumstances make them react very differently to the same situations
I also love seeing the differences between characters from each other’s POV - like, p much all the characters think that Rachel is completely fearless, but when the book is from her POV, we get to see that that isn’t true at all - she feels plenty of fear, but she recognizes that her role in the group is to be the fearless one, so she pushes aside her fear to fit into that role (which inadvertently pushes her more and more into that ‘fearless warrior’ box - something that happens to all the characters more and more as the story goes on, like jake as ‘the leader’ and Marco as ‘the jokester’).
Also I loooove the grey morality of literally everything. Like the book where ax discovers an andalite traitor - not a controller, just an andalite who betrayed them to the yeerks. This leads to the deaths of like a hundred other andalites, and that whole scene you really just feel for ax, bc he feels so awful about everyone else dying while he escapes, yet he’s also so grateful to be alive, which he in turn feels bad about...
And ax’s conflict about being torn between his home w/his fellow andalites and his new home on earth w/his friends is great
And oh man I fucking love book 19. Any of the books where it goes more into the yeerks and their side of things are so good, just like the book where jake was made into a controller.
And book 19, where we meet a sympathetic yeerk, comes right after 18, where we meet an andalite traitor - again, I love how we clearly see that no one side is completely good or completely bad
So yeah book 19 fucking slapped. That shit was so compelling. I love how Cassie made a bunch of foolish decisions based on naïve hope, but it worked out!! Things aren’t always bleak and awful!
Except there were plenty bleak and awful parts of this book. It had a great balance of moods tbh, even though a lot of the situations were extremely contrived lmao. I love the stuff that aftran says, which is basically what I was thinking when I started my reread - being a yeerk fucking sucks, you’re literally a blind slug but also completely and fully sentient, on the same level as humans and andalites - and as afran pointed out this book, the yeerks are born as parasites, just as humans are born as predators - why is it okay for the humans to kill countless animals to eat, but not for the yeerks to enslave races to act as hosts? Well, the situation isn’t totally comparable, which Cassie and Marco both point out when aftran makes that comparison - the yeerks are enslaving sentient species, and cows and chickens are not the same as the humans and hork-bajir (though the story understandably doesn’t fall too deeply into the ‘who deserves what right/animal sentience’ rabbit hole).
And I like that aftran points out that the yeerks basically have 2 options currently - stay helpless and blind in a yeerk pool, or enslave a host. It’s interesting to hear that a lot of yeerks don’t like doing this but see it as the only options, as opposed to complete sensory deprivation. It makes me wonder if there are yeerks who are so staunchly against it that they elect to stay as pool-bound slugs forever
Also maybe it’s the shounen anime fan in me but I don’t even care that much that Cassie’s entire plan was completely off the rails and hinged on only the slightest chance of success - with failure being much more likely and completely catastrophic, with the animorphs and their loved ones all being wiped out, vs success being unlikely and also achieving...a moral victory? Peace between two enemy combatants in a huge war? nothing all that concrete...anyways it was a bunch of good-faith horrible decisions on Cassie’s part, but I don’t even care? I love stories where hope and love save the day against all odds, especially when they’re wielded like weapons by a character and make everything end nicely
This is especially true here bc animorphs is generally a series that leans very far away from that type of thing, so when it does happen, it feels like a victory. Plus the David trilogy is next so we kinda need a happy ending while we can
also bc I compared animorphs to hxh last time, I now have to compare it to the other series I've (partially) liveblogged, transformers mtmte.
this is gonna be more abstract and brief but basically. mtmte is all about after the war, and everyone has so much trauma and everything just sucks, so they all go on a space cruise and work on themselves. basically.
but the series does a lot of exploration of how war fucks people up - same as animorphs, tho animorphs spans the beginning of the war (for the main characters at least) until the end, whereas mtmte starts when the war ends.
but the point is. both series do an excellent job showcasing the wide range of reactions people have to being put in unthinkable situations during wartime. all the major characters in mtmte go through arcs where they heal/change from the war, some more subtle than others
basically the animorphs needs to go on a wacky space cruise adventure with a bunch of other fucked up people and figure their shit out, mtmte style
ok this is wicked long already so I’m gonna end it here. also I feel like I should start the next liveblog w/the david triology bc I’m for sure gonna have a lot to say abt that
#i wrote like half of this in my phone notes while on vacation in the wilderness lmao#animorphs#lj reads animorphs
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Spn 15x18 spoilers below
Dean can’t reciprocate: Spn Meta on Romance as the language of the soul or alt theory Aro Dean
So the 15x18 script had line about Dean can’t reciprocate. And I thought hmmm.... prob just like everyone else and here are my two cents.
Dean can’t reciprocate because:
He only ever thought of Cas as friend and would never want to pursue any relationship more than that.
He is aro and he doesn’t connect with romantic attraction. And this is absolutely fine!
He has denied and repressed any romantic urges and numbed himself to them. Big diff between this and Aro because Aro is natural and valid but repressing romantic attraction is not.
He was like wtf is happening right now. I need time to process.
I am Destiel shipper so obviously hard no to #1, but that is a completely valid opinion just not one I share. But I refuse to even enumerate any opinion of Dean being offended by the declaration. #4 could be case and with more time Dean would have reciprocated. But for this post I’m really focusing in on #3 and maybe a little #2.
In my opinion, Aro Dean is not a Destiel deal breaker. I think Dean and Cas can still have beautiful relationship with platonic love and sexual attraction and low to none romantic attraction on Dean’s side.
Really the purpose of meta was to poke at possibility of romantically repressed Dean. And the convo Famine had with Dean way back in season 5 came to mind.
Notes: I am awful at meta, so take this entire dump with grain of salt. Just some things I noticed while thinking about Dean’s romantic identity and making metaphorical comparisons to heart, romantic soul, and will power from a couple scenes in Spn.
Metaphors under consideration from Spn scenes
Heart
associated with acts of caring that are selfless and kind (like saying someone has a big heart)
Will power
Driving yourself to get your shit done.
In Dean’s case his will power is typically fueled by hate and anger because he is a monster hunter and his anger keeps him going even when he wants to give up.
Romantic soul
your romantic connection to other people (i. e. soulmate) and doesn’t necessarily have to be sexual.
Spn 5x14 Famine talks to Dean about his broken, empty soul
FAMINE: hunger doesn't just come from the body, it also comes from the soul.
DEAN: It's funny, it doesn't seem to be coming from mine.
FAMINE: Yes. I noticed that. Have you wondered why that is? How you could even walk in my presence?
DEAN: Well, I like to think it's because of my strength of character.
FAMINE: I disagree. That's one deep, dark nothing you got there, Dean. Can't fill it, can you? Not with food or drink. Not even with sex.
DEAN: Oh, you're so full of crap.
FAMINE: Oh, you can smirk and joke and lie to your brother, lie to yourself, but not to me! I can see inside you, Dean. I can see how broken you are, how defeated. You can't win, and you know it. But you just keep fighting. Just... keep going through the motions. You're not hungry, Dean, because inside, you're already...dead.
Spn 15x18 Castiel talks about Dean including how he sees himself and how loving he really is
CASTIEL: you see yourself the same way our enemies see you. you’re destructive and you’re angry and you’re broken... you’re daddy’s little blunt instrument. and you think that hate and anger, that’s what drives you, that’s who you are. it’s not. everyone who knows you sees it. everything you’ve ever done, the good and the bad, you have done for love. you raised your little brother for love, you fought for this whole world for love. that is who you are. you are the most caring man on earth. you are the most selfless, loving human being i will ever know.
Romantic Identity Thoughts for Dean
I agree with popular opinion that Dean reads like a bisexual character, but his romantic identity doesn’t necessarily have to match. And I think so far he doesn’t seem to fit label of biromantic. Like biromantic is possibility if Dean is just repressing his romantic urges because he has numbed his soul to all feelings per Famine’s monologue. Or just we haven’t seen it on show but Dean does feel that way. But I think some other labels may be better fit for Dean.
Dean is really good at all the platonic aspects of love. Like Castiel said Dean has a big heart. platonic love is very selfless. It is driving to help a friend, sharing interests, caring about each other’s wellbeing, being there to support them, and protectiveness. At its purest it is selfless and expects nothing in return. Pure platonic love is not jealous love. You don’t get jealous about the recepient spending time with others. You are also typically okay when they are gone. And that plays back well with Castiel’s speech in 15x18. Just aside, Dean being really good at platonic love is important if you read Castiel as demiromantic because Castiel would need a strong friendship before he feels any kind of romantic attraction.
Dean also enjoys casual sex and shows signs of sexual attraction for men and women. Although the show has only established female sex partners so far, that does not mean he isn’t attracted to men too. And there have been instances in show that read as sexually attracted to men.
But even though Dean has had multiple sexual relationships on the show, Dean has no canon romantic attraction. Other than the weird witch sisters when he was hexed in 13x12. That curse was first time Dean was in romantic love, and it wasn’t consensual which sucks but non-con is a common spn theme.
Maybe it could be argued Cassie and Lisa were romantic love interests. But I dunno he kind of just left them without any noticeable regrets. So it seemed like Dean enjoyed protecting them, being a good friend, and having sex with them, but there was no soul yearning romantic aspect to the relationship. These weren’t woman that he couldn’t live without. Their loss didn’t crush his soul.
But then there is Castiel. And each time Castiel is lost Dean falls apart. This tough hunter that tragically gives last rites to his family and friends on a daily basis becomes a sop of hurt and angst when Castiel is gone. Those are very romantic feelings. Then Dean seems to bounce back to happiness once Cas comes back. So maybe Famine was wrong or lied because Spn monsters seem to get retconned into lying quite a bit, or maybe Dean has already started to explore and nurture his own romantic identity or in Spn Famine terms soul.
Also Romantic love often tends to be jealous and possessive. Like Famine said this is a hunger, and it can be this wild, ravenous thing. So by Castiel calling out all Dean’s selfless acts it kind of resonates with Dean not having a current romantic partner and that being something Castiel wants for Dean.
Anyway, romantic identity and sexual identity don’t have to match. So Dean can be bisexual and homoromantic or bisexual and aro. I am thinking demi-, or homo-, or biromantic, because Dean does seem to experience some very romantic feelings for Castiel (i.e. touches, looks, romantic squabbles, and the overwhelming need for Castiel to be around). If Dean tells Castiel that he just doesn’t feel the connection to love speeches and romantic thoughts then aromantic may actually be a better fit for him.
There is even a WTFromantic that is meant for people that can’t feel romantic attraction because the things in their life have overwhelmed them to the point that the concept of romantic attraction is just completely inaccessible to them. And I dunno, but that label seems pretty descriptive of Dean too.
So Dean may not be able to reciprocate romantic feelings because he has made a conscious decision to just repress all romantic attraction as much as possible per Famine monologue. Even tho Famine talk was 10 years ago Dean still has same problems. He is going through motions, as in 15x17 where he denies there even is a case to solve. He is fueled by anger and hate. Right before Cas’s romantic declaration, Dean is talking about all he feels is angry and bloodthirsty. So that empty soul that has been denied every desire may still be mangled and hurting. Dean just needs to confess he isn’t coping and get help.
Or Dean may identify as a character that doesn’t connect romantically, if Dean is aro then there was nothing ever wrong with him because that is valid and no one should push him to act in a way that isn’t natural for him. And I specifically tried to use romantic soul, because I don’t mean to make any kind of comparison to romantic attraction and the immortal soul like that is totally separate concept.
Anyway, I kind of feel like the show is setting it up as former and that by calling Dean broken it is describing him as repressed romantically and maybe the next couple episodes are him coming to terms with that aspect of himself. Like he’s been running on anger for so long maybe time to do some soul searching.
Disclaimer: romantic and sexual identity labels are not meant to be prescriptive, they are just supposed to help describe your truth so you can have a language that describes your own personal identity and you know you are not alone and you have a community. I would never apply them to other people, but Dean is fictional and interesting so I thought I’d try to dig at what the writers and actors were doing to either consciously or unconsciously give Dean his own romantic and sexual identity.
#spn meta#destiel meta#Destiel#spn spoilers#15x18#Spn spec#romantic questioning Dean#demiromantic bisexual Dean#aro bisexual Dean#Dean is queer#Dean cannot reciprocate
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Tangled Salt Marathon - The Brothers Hook
It’s time to say goodbye to Hook Foot. He won’t be missed.
Summary: Rapunzel takes everyone to see Hook Hand in concert. However, this brings back bad memories in Hook Foot, as he was always overshadowed and looked down on by his elder brother. Hook Hand is revealed to be employed by the self-centered King Trevor who wants Hook Hand to play at the ceremony of the marriage between the Seal of Equis and his female mate. When Hook Foot sabotages his brother’s performance at the wedding he must face King Trevor in a dance off to save Hook hand’s career.
The Episode Placement Is Indeed Wrong
I talked about this last episode, but the ordering of episodes is confusing.
The Brother’s Hook does come after Rapunzel: Day One in terms of production order and is placed after it on the Disney Plus, but it supposedly aired before Rapunzel: Day One originally and the events make more sense in that aired order. As they’re traveling on foot here because they lost the caravan, and they’re all stressed out and fighting in the first scene of this episode. Also it world explain Hook Foot’s absence in Rapunzel Day One.
Yet why would they order things that way? Why hold off on resolving the Raps and Cass argument if you’re not going to even hint at it here? Why not place this earlier in the season so that you wouldn’t be dragging Hook Foot along in the Great Tree for no reason?
It just goes to show how rushed and poorly planned out season two actually was.
This is Another Pointless Parallel
So Hook Foot is suppose to represent Cassandra here and Hook Hand is supposed to be Rapunzel in this scenario but like that doesn’t work for several reasons.
For one, Rapunzel never discouraged Cassandra’s dreams. Cassandra herself just never opened up to tell her what those dreams were, and indeed even the audience don’t know what Cass’s dreams are now that she’s already achieved her goal of becoming a guard back in the first season. I don’t think even Cassandra knows what she wants.
Second, Rapunzel and Cassandra’s conflict isn’t actually about ‘dreams’, it’s about control. Each wants to control the other, to be in charge, because they think themselves always right. Both equate ‘being right’ and a lack of criticism as validation and to them, and this show in general, validation is equated with ‘love and compassion’ and is the ultimate end all and be all goal for everyone. Even though that’s not how validation works and a it’s a very unhealthy mindset to promote.
Third, no one owes you anything. Yeah, Hook Hand is a jerk here, but at the end of the day giving up on his dreams was Hook Foot’s choice. You are in charge of your own choices, and at some point you need to decide if you’re going to listen to rest of the world telling you no or have some self respect and do what you want because you want it. You don’t actually need anyone’s approval but your own. By making ‘validation’ the end all and be all of the narrative, it undermines characters agency and fails to teach people about self respect and accountability.
Same goes for Cassandra, even more so in fact. She needs to be the one to get off her ass and try for what she wants. No one is going to hand it to her and Raps doesn’t owe her a damn thing. Cassandra is the only thing getting the way of Cassandra because time and time again the series gives her chances that she refuses to take for ill defined reasons. There’s nothing at stake for her to lose if she just left.
Last off, no one learns anything from this. Cass gets nothing out of it despite being right there the whole time, and Rapunzel is too hypocritical and self centred to see that she is very bit the bully same as Hook Hand. Not because she crushes Cassandra’s dreams like the narrative wants you to think, but because she tries to insert herself and her views on to everyone.
Bullshit
Once again, may I remind you that there is over twenty villians in this show and only four of them get redemptions. Four! And one of those four was Eugene’s doing not Rapunzel’s.
The narrative does not support the ideas that it wants to push. If you want me to believe that Rapunzel does sincerely believe in second chances then you need to show her giving that chance to everybody equally. And no, not everyone has to take it, not everyone needs to be redeemed, but she needs to at least try. Especially if they’re a recurring baddie with a tragic backstory like Lady Caine’s.
Oh, and may I also remind you that currently a 15 year old orphan is rotting away in a jail cell because of the corrupt government and Rapunzel does not give a crap!
The Song Is Sounds Good But It Adds Nothing
It doesn’t add anything to the overall narrative and it fails to add anything to the episode itself because it gives us no new information.
This is extremely wasteful. Not only because Alan Menken and Glenn Slater are highly respected artists who are wasting their talents on crap like this, but also for pure budgetary reasons. Tangled has a limited budget for songs that is worked into the contract. Each season is suppose to get eight original songs and two reprises. (tho season three trades out one of those songs for an extra reprise)
In an arc heavy series like this, with such a limited number of songs to convey information, then you need to choose where those songs go wisely. The writers did not choose wisely in this instance.
Rapunzel You Are Not In A Position To Give Advice Here
This episode is foreshadowing for what season three would become. Which is a complete formula switch up that undermines the narrative’s goals.
This is suppose to be a coming of age tale. That’s in its mission statement. It’s what the writers supposedly wanted to achieve according to interviews and the very pilot episode itself.
That requires Rapunzel learning and growing. She can’t be in the mentor role. She can’t be the one to give out sage advice if she is the one who is meant to grow the most. She not there yet. She’s not experienced enough to fulfill that place in the narrative.
Season one may have been repetitive in it’s lessons but it at least tried to show Rapunzel owning up to mistakes and changing as a person, but here and in season three they toss that out the window and have Rapunzel teaching other people lessons instead. People who ultimately don’t matter to the overall narrative.
Instead of showing her growing as a person and coming to fit in that role over time due to experience, it has the opposite effect of showing Rapunzel as being patronizing, selfish, and unworthy to rule. Because she has no grounds for having an opinion, no basis for her advice to go off of, no experience to back up what she says, and zero claims for being in charge except for being born in a classist feudal system.
Had the narrative actually bothered to call out this instead of just having Cass pitch a hissy fit over nothing, then we could have gotten a really complex character and unique moral to the show, but that’s not what actually happens.
King Trevor Is the Saving Grace of This Episode
I don’t think the writers realize that Trevor isn’t the hateable douche that they believe him to be.
Oh sure he’s not nice, he’s essentially the equivalent of an annoying ‘I want to speak to the manager!’ type customer. But there is a huge, huge difference between being a Karen and being a fascist dictator. One’s irritating and the other is actively malicious and a danger to people's lives.
Frederic might be outwardly more pleasant but he’s still a person who abuses his power in order to harm poor people. Trevor is just a mother-of-bridezilla here and a perfectionist. Like big deal.
And to be honest Rapunzel isn’t that much better.
Like you are a bully Raps. You’re every bit a pushy and demanding as Trevor is, particularly in season three.
While she’s not actively malicious like Frederic, she’s still a danger to people because she refuses to acknowledge that the power she wields has an impact on others lives and that that impact can indeed be negative.
There’s something called the banality of evil. That being simply mean to others isn’t how true evil spreads. It’s people refusing to challenge the system, and if you are a part of that system then you are a part of the evil it spreads no matter how nice you are outwardly.
Rapunzel and the show at large, does not understand the difference between being nice and being kind. It introduces the concept of flawed government and systems but then does nothing to actually challenge it. It forgoes the actual work it takes to make change happen by focusing on easy outs and proformative progressivism.
Trevor does more than either Frederic or Rapunzel here with this one line alone than they do in three full seasons.
Eugene did indeed commit a violent crime, no matter how much the show tried to present such a crime as ‘funny’. Trevor is in his legal rights to prosecute the person who tried to kidnap his child/pet and assaulted his personage.
Yet he’s actually granting mercy here. More than that, he’s inviting them to his child’s/pet’s wedding. He’s offering friendship when he could have had them killed. Because Tevor, for all his faults, recognizes the power the that he wields and then makes the conscious decision not to abuse that power.
Moreover over he acknowledges the difference between what is a personal offense and not a an attack on his kingdom as a whole. What Eugene and Frederic did could have been considered an act of war and Trevor never even considered that an option.
It’s sign of bad writing when the person we’re supposed to consider a jerk and a recurring antagonist is more compassionate than the main heroine herself. Even as he jeers and makes an arse of himself.
This is the Point Where Rapunzel’s Characterization Buckles and Breaks
At first glance this seems like growth. She’s now assertive and taking charge, and Hook Hand did indeed had this coming, but in context of the greater narrative and how Rapunzel’s character develops past this episode, this is the point where the wheels start to come off.
Rapunzel is a hypocrite. We’ve established this as a fundamental part of her characterization back in season one and it’s the driving force behind all of the main conflicts with her in the first two seasons. But before now, her hypocrisy at least had consequences. It caused enough problems that if you were paying attention you could see it for the flaw that it was.
But here her hypocrisy is presented as being right. She looks over Hook Hand even as she tells him not to look down on others. She dictates to him how his relationship with his own brother should go, when she has zero context for said relationship. She’s heard only one side of the story and only a piece of it. She doesn’t know what actually went down between them while they were growing up nor does she honestly care why Hook Hand does what he does. Even as she asks him why.
Yet she is rewarded for this behavior. She’s never called out as wrong. The narrative bends over backwards to accommodate her and reinforces her views. Without direct consequences a character’s flaws are rendered meaningless, and so the character will only frustrate the audience rather than endear themselves to us.
That is the opposite of what you want to achieve in a story. You want to the audience to like you’re main characters, or at least find them entertaining in their awfulness. Making them right all of the time, even when they’re wrong sabotages this goal.
Trevor’s Still the Better Person Here
Like it may not have been Hook Hands fault, but at the end of the day he did screw up at his job and a paying customer has the right to be upset and refuse to work with you again or even demand their money back. That’s what being self-employed means. It’s part of the risk you take as being a contractor.
Trevor’s not being unreasonable here just because he raised his voice and wants Hook Hand to leave the wedding premises. Yeah the insults are uncalled for, I’ll give you, but remember that Frederic locked a tailor in a stockade for accidently ripping a robe; that he has the ability to fix if he wasn’t locked up.
And he resolves conflicts and personal insults with a dance off!
What happened when someone called Frederic out for being a poor leader and endangering lives, oh yeah they wound up in jail!
Also This Episode’s Big Climax is a Fucking Dance Off
Out of all the low stakes conflicts in this show this is the lowest.
And it’s coming right off The Great Tree and the big Cassandra vs Rapunzel fight. This shouldn’t be here. It’s throws off the pacing the tone.
Well I Guess Trevor Kept HIs Word, Which Is More Than What Frederic Would Do
Like Trevor is defeated and he does indeed complain about losing, but everyone is apparently free to leave afterwards and Hook Hand still has a career so I guess Trevor kept his side of the bargain. Even though he has no reason to and no one to hold him to account for it. He just has a code of honor I guess.
Meanwhile, Frederic throws a teenager in a dungeon after promising to help him and completely ignores his supposed friend Quirin being encased in amber.
So What Was the Point In Bringing Hook Foot Along Again?
What did Hook Foot add? What did he bring to the story that no other character out there could bring? What does writing him out of the story now achieve, and why couldn’t he have been left out of the narrative all together?
If your answer to all of those question is ‘Nothing!’, then congratulations you have more sense than the showrunners.
I have seen a few people get angry and suggest that Lance should have been the one to go because getting rid of Hook Foot meant getting rid of the shows main disabled rep, but that’s ignoring that getting rid of Lance would mean getting rid of the shows only real black representation as well. Because tokenism isn’t real representation.
Yet for all of how poorly handled Lance’s character was, he still has more reason to be there than Hook Foot. He has a unique connection to one of the main characters that, once introduced, would be hard to ignore. There’s nothing connecting Hook Foot to the plot or the main characters, and that’s why he shouldn’t have been in the show at all. Regardless of how much you may have liked him.
Destiny Isn’t a Goal!!!
How many times do I have to say this!?
A goal needs to be specific. It needs to have logical motivation behind it. It needs a clear obstacle to be overcome for the character to achieve it.
A vague ‘destiny’ has none of those things.
Conclusion
Meh. That’s the word that best describes this episode and the majority of season two. It’s not the worst thing ever if you just want to shut your brain off for 30 minutes, but it’s not actually good either, and if you stop to think about any of it for more than two seconds it falls apart.
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Do you have any favorites in terms of s7 fics or post-canon/future fics in TWW? thank you :)
I really have become a rec blog huh? This is the most fun thing ever lmao, please keep asking for recs!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/27898720--glory is that bright tragic thing by shesmyplusone: a very very cute fic of josh talking to leo’s grave with a visitor. mentions all the s7 cast with some of josh’s own thoughts. ngl, almost cried
https://archiveofourown.org/works/28259976--Send a Postcard From Down the Street by @cauldronoflove: one of my favorite s7 fics! maybe my absolute favorite idk that’s a hard spot to be in. it’s mostly donna and sam being besties (which, btw, the best friendship ever) and talking about sam’s decision to leave but also them worrying about the new administration, and also donna being an absolute badass with helen santos (who i love, fight me), and...you know, i’ll stop here, but this is definitely something to read!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/28096008/chapters/68838846--she might just be my everything and beyond by romanovaly: a donnajosh fic! this advances their relationship very very quickly and it’s an adorable two chapter fic with the entire bartlet gang! i agree with the author; i will always be salty that we never got a complete family reunion
https://archiveofourown.org/works/28030764/chapters/68668905--In The Beginning by spamtotz: another donnajosh fic! ngl most postcanon fics are donnajosh, but no complaints from me lol. Unlike the last fic, this one focuses on their fledgling relationship feat. Josh Being An Entire Idiot
https://archiveofourown.org/works/27537739/chapters/67347088--And the Pursuit of Happiness by @welcometo-yourworld: samjosh being idiots postcanon! this one is still being actively updated, but it also features Josh being an idiot but with company! it’s so so so good, and not a single character is OOC. i don’t really know how to describe this other than good lol, but definitely worth the read!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/150951--Out at Sea by tosca1390: cj & Danny! i should read more of this ship...hm. Either way, this is such a good fic, and makes me feel nostalgic for some reason though the show is obviously fictional? it also features toby and cj, which was one of the best pairs, idc if you ship it romantically or platonic.
https://archiveofourown.org/works/150944--April(Again) by tosca1390: a moment between josh and sam with their new roles, but their friendship is so funny. also mentions of donnajosh, so samjosh is entirely brotp here, but i love this slice of life!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/549156--Cupcakery by tosca1390: literally plotless, but so so so good! idk its ainsely and sam being cute with a side of bram. i think it also mentions rory gilmour from gilmour girls but I've also never seen gilmour girls so idk lol. i mostly love it for the sam/ainsley
https://archiveofourown.org/works/687863--Giving in to Ainsley by fluffernutter8: another sam/ainsley fic! (there should be a ship name lol I’m getting tired of typing that out) this one is like 50% sam and josh just talking but it’s not like boring or anything, it’s mostly sweet with a little bit at the end that makes my heart flutter with the p o s s i b i l i t i e s
https://archiveofourown.org/works/10724649--Transitions by shanegray: josh introspection post series! it also includes snippets of some cute stories post story. 10/10, have and will probably read again
https://archiveofourown.org/works/2444471--The Human Spirit by brutti_ma_buoni: a moment between sam and josh talking about leo post series. this one is only available to archive users tho, but if you have an account, definitely log in and read!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/27898720--glory is that bright tragic thing by shesmyplusone: a josh fic mostly, but with mentions of all the season characters. it’s very very sweet, might give you cavities!
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11454501/1/Key-Square?__cf_chl_jschl_tk__=f8cebedafcafdf27e34fc2c951981d4b1c4faacf-1610378507---Key Square by Every Shade of Blue on FF.net: (not a fan of FF.net and I shortened the link, so you have to click on it, not copy and paste bc it was really long) set way post series, but absolutely wonderful. another seaborn for president fic! i include it in this list bc it covers the ending part of the santos admin
https://www.fanfiction.net/s/11782078/1/Brotherhood--Brotherhood by Every Shade of Blue of FF.net: (this link is fine) I, like the author, was disappointed that we never got a sam/toby reunion, so here it is lol
https://archiveofourown.org/works/1077955--The People’s Servants by Speranza: Big Block of Cheese Day in the santos admin! isn’t that wonderful?
https://archiveofourown.org/works/28442229--Balancing on Breaking Branches by @slightlyraspberry: s7 but different! this was also on my favorite fics ever list, but it is s7 centric so here it is
https://archiveofourown.org/works/27752194--the elephant in the Whitehouse by shesmyplusone: a donnajosh fic but featuring toby and josh talking about the events of The Cold (the kiss heard round the world!) donna is only mentioned, it’s really just toby and josh centric, which btw, was a ridiculous relationship that i LIVE for
https://archiveofourown.org/works/25931149--Sensual Politics by @slightlyraspberry: (idk if you can tell but their one of my favorite authors lol) Not strictly s7 or post canon, but a large part of it is post series, so here ya go! donnajosh endgame, but it covers other relationships and takes their bumpy road and makes it even bumpier. Hard to describe, but definitely worth reading!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/872511--Week one by Jackie Thomas: samjosh in the santos admin! i have a thing for josh struggling with trying to live up to what leo was for them, and it’s fantastic. absolutely fantastic
https://archiveofourown.org/works/21242702--Those Who Show Up by nitpickyabouttrains: (you know what this has made me realize? how strange AO3 usernames are) an au where josh goes and gets sam a little earlier! well he doesn’t actually go, but a scene that totally could’ve taken place canon. their relationship is platonic but it’s so so so well written!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/17140226/chapters/40308749--Scar Tissue by ballonballon: the santos admin + rosslyn! what else is there to say?
https://archiveofourown.org/works/18586651--Five to Four by arborealstops: MY ABSOLTUE FAVORITEEEEEEEEE. josh and sam once gay marriage is legalized with a dumpster fire (but an adorable one) of a marriage proposal
https://archiveofourown.org/works/21838909--Power Coupling by theycallmethejackal: amy gardner/sam seaborn in the santos admin. an interesting couple but one i like lol
https://archiveofourown.org/works/21930001/chapters/52341781--Upon My Sleeve by theycallmethejackal: another amy gardner/sam seaborn fic! comes with a sequel too, but takes place in the santos admin!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/18852391/chapters/44743792--Obergefell v. Hodges by Charowak: gay marriage is legalized with samjosh! also feat. bi matt santos
https://archiveofourown.org/works/24916270--A New Friday Night Ritual by Chinesepapercut: girls night in the santos admin feat. donnajosh, helen santos, and the old crew!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/18281033--save me a place by @iwasfollowingyou: MY FAVORITE THING EVER!!! transition but samjosh and so so so sweet it might give you cavities!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/27977637--What Would Leo (Or Andrew Jackson) Do? by mlea7675: another big block of cheese day in the santos admin!
https://archiveofourown.org/works/27072835/chapters/66102826--JigSaw by spearquint: another samjosh in the santos admin! this covers them getting back together after sam left tho
THIS IS SO SO SO LONG LMAO
I hope you try all of these out! They are so so so good!
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Tma relisten Episodes 11-15
So this round already has two other posts out of it about Oliver because he Bae.
These have alot of ideas regarding entities changing around reality, controlling non victims to set the stage, and turning around what people love most to their worst fear. Also insane abilities of the crew to obtain hard to access info and evidence! And some more Jon sass. Enjoy!
11 dreamer
Wow this episode had alot. I made a separate post with a theory about Oliver's statement here and a realization regarding him and Jane Prentiss here. They are alot to unpack
Oliver is so. Freaking. Relatable! Learned economics and hated it. Nearly had a breakdown like him because of it. "going to stay with some of the few friends that had survived my year of stress-fuelled outbursts and constantly cancelled plans." yep. That.
Boyfriend Graham ey? You notebook eating Graham?? Wow that guy is full of surprises.
I love the dream sequences and their descriptions it's a really beautiful thing to try and picture.
Its interesting how he went from passive to desparate to passive again about death. He tries but can't help. I wonder when the dreams started to bother him so much he sought after the silence of point Nemo. Was it when they became so full of red because of the apocalypse coming closer? Hmmm
Another person named John. I guess that makes sense it's a common name. But I forgot how many people are fully named in this podcast. Hundreds of names to come up with! Jonny I'm quite impressed!
He worked with Jane Prentiss in the magic shop! I can't believe I forgot about that! Wow small avatar world indeed.
"It led me to a room, the label of which was still visible, and read “Archive”. I entered to see walls covered with shelves and cabinets stretching off into the distance. These shelves were coated in a sticky black tar, which I knew at that moment was the thickened, pulpy blood that pumped through each and every one of those veins." everything that has to do with the Fears I bet. Full of death and destruction and stolen from the veins to be out on display for the Eye's pleasure.
Yo Jon is scared of this he's seriously considering going to Elias for advice
" I had Tim look into it, as I don’t entirely trust the others not to have written it as a practical joke" wait. He trusts TIM? Not to do a practical joke? How. Why. Eh?
"died in the line of duty" fuck you Jonah.
Now Jon will get every new statement immediately when it's made. Perhaps this was Elias' intention all along. To scare him into making sure he does not miss any paranormal activity recorded by the institute.
12 first aid
I'm not immune to more Gerry badassery, hell yeah
And we get polish Martin which hell yeah! Even if Jon doesn't believe it. I'm sure he's repressing the fact that he's thoroughly impressed.
I think it's really interesting the effect entities have on people who are decidedly not their victims. Everyone leaving no questions so the entity can set the scene for the scare. Like with Gillespie how no one lived in the apartment building he was in etc. Alot of work into a handful of people being genuinely scared.
Gerry's burns stopped at the neck? How did he manage that. Also it's hilarious to imagine that he's like "yes burn all of me but please. not my goth makeup"
Zippo lighter with eye design!! And Jon has web design! They are brothers (joke but still really interesting)
Liquids were boiling around her and she didn't feel the heat. Also an interesting effect just for the scare.
Gerry got eye superpowers like Jon if he can function while injure and filled with painkillers.
“Yes. For you, better beholding than the lightless flame.” Gerry knew she'd be haunted by a Fear from that day on and realised that perhaps being watched would be easier for her specifically to deal with than the Desolation. I guess that's a way of assessing people. Which fear would least bother you.
Jon is already enamoured with Gerry you can tell. He can't wait to hear more from him. Just you wait Jon.
They really can access alot of information huh. CCTV Interviews files. Pretty impressive for a non-research team. They're so good at it they'd rather do that than actual archiving.
13 alone
The sound editing in this episode is not that great it was a bit to get used to.
We get a glimpse at the Lukases which is... Ugh
Jon is actually trying to be nice. Granted it's not working and she is a bit of a standoffish person herself who just went through a bad time but alot of her reactions are not his fault. He was trying to be considerate giving her space to record but he did stay when she asked.
She had already leaned into the Lonely before the incident it's interesting to see how some of these statements start with a person actually liking the aspect that later turns to fear. Same happens in lost johns' cave.
Evan Lukas sounds like an avatar of the exact opposite of the Lonely. At least to her. That's a really interesting effect from someone, especially a Lukas.
But maybe dying wasn't his family killing him but him not feeding his patron which he tried to leave. Really tragic.
She was in Martin's domain eyyy!
It's got a bit of buried aspects to it with the grave stuff and all.
"My fingers dug into the soft cemetery dirt as I looked around desperately for anything I could use to save myself, and my hand closed upon that heavy piece of headstone. It took all my self-control to keep a grip on that anchor, as I slowly dragged myself away from the edge of my lonely grave." The headstone was her anchor? But it said forgotten. I wonder how it helped her pull away. It probably had to go together with Evan's voice. Like the rib and the tape recorders having to work together! I just wonder what meaning the stone had for her.
"I’d be tempted to chalk this one up to a hallucination from stress and trauma, if it wasn’t for the fact... " God he does believe her heavens. He's not a skeptic!
This is when Jon's dreams start which... Good luck Jon.
14 piecemeal
Rentoul is terrifying sonofabitch and I would never want to meet him irl
I remembered them talking about how he was supposed to be a person who cursed alot and they couldn't do it because of sensor and I have to agree this could have been much better for the story. I tried imagining curses in some places.
LOL Jon reading this is funny. Trying to voice act the bad boy. Doesn't sound right on his voice.
With these kinds of statements happening alot where the person does something bad, the institute has to be in touch with police over them. The nda has to include that.
Hello Angela! I really wonder what her deal is. She scared the bid bully so she gotta have creepy vibes to the extreme.
Another lighter! Hmm do I have to start following the lighter motiff in this podcast. This one has a topless woman on it. Flesh lighter?
Salesa's also appearing that's cool! Noriega was probably looking for an artifact to reverse the curse. Didn't work tho since they left with the crate. The buried crate perhaps?
I'm wondering. Was this written? Because the statement sounds like he's talking. If so, Where's the recording?
Oh Jon your attitude towards Martin is so bad. He works so hard and it's not even in what he's good at, sorting and filing like he knows how to do from the library. God.
What's the deal with all the furniture gone? Did he think it'll help not get injured? He's not that smart if he thought that would help him.
15 lost Johns' cave
Ack a bad statement she was not a good person all around
Another example of the entities setting the stage by controlling others not to interfere with the victim's experience.
Also another example of the person liking the subject (cave exploration in this case. And the dark for that matter) only for it to turn against them.
Not much to say about this one other than its one of the scarier ones for sure. And her recording in the end is really the cherry on top. There is alot of discrepancy between what she believed happened and what actually did which shows how much the fear plays with and changes around reality. That's also how she manages to lie in a statement to Beholding. It wasn't a lie. It was her version of reality and she did not remember saying those awful words.
Taught me alot about cave diving and how much I will never do it in my life.
The Dark was mixed into this as well so it wasn't purely Buried.
Btw Where did she get the candles she was found with?
It feels like she made a choice. Didn't want to spend her last moments with her sister and then didn't want to die. She chose her sister to be taken over her. Her sister called for help and the candle coming closer might have been her! But she just shut her eyes.
How did Tim gain access to the recording?? Wow that's some prime evidence.
Martin is claustrophobic amongst other things huh? Live how Jon just dismisses this as an excuse not to work. At least he didn't push it.
#tma#the magnus archives#jonathan sims#martin blackwood#Tim stoker#Oliver banks#Tma hiatus liveblog#gerry keay
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i never understood why din took his helmet off twice! i actually really liked when he took it off in the imperial base-- i thought it did show some character development in how far he would go, what he would sacrifice to save grogu-- but taking it off again to say goodbye was just outright silly. and all the imperials in the place getting blown to bits minutes later kind of negated the emotional weight of him taking it off but maybe that's just me
i still didnt like the morak bit but youre right, there was a specific reason why din took it off, to do something to help his baby but at the same time, if u start to look at the specifics of the scene, then its just fucking silly
first of all, the imperial computer only needed to see A FACE. not a face of a stormtrooper, just a FACE. which is strange in itself, but ok, whatever, i’ll let it pass bc maybe it was taking pictures of everyone who accessed the database for later use. but like, if you are concerned about who uses the database then why not implement some sort of facial recognition gihfihgifhg what the hell
and then the reason why mayfeld cant do it is bc he's concerned that some imperial officer is gonna recognize him. ok then what all din needed to do is sit down next to that officer and try to talk to him and distract him long enough for mayfeld to do his stuff by the computer. i know its not the most EXCITING scene but the way they forced din to take off his helmet is just soooo forced and contrived?? mayfeld literally went ‘ooohh ooof there's some guy who MIGHT recognize me I'm scared you have to go access the face computer bc i cant owww’
another issue i have with morak is that. they picked.
they picked MAYFELD to be the one to challenge the entire Mandalorian culture. like who the fuck is mayfeld. he's nobody he wasn't even in the previous episodes and suddenly he's the mouthpiece of an Opinion?? and I'm not going to say that he's wrong bc in the essence he was criticizing that stiff rules are bad rules and that's a point i can agree with and i think even din agrees with. the point mayfeld was making was that sooner or later, there comes a moment when you have to bend the rules a little bit and if your rules don't allow for that then they're not good. and that's a fair observation (better than “YOURE IN A CULT”). however, the fact that its MAYFELD OF ALL PEOPLE delivering that point is just. downright silly, like who is that baldo. who is that. he doesn't mean anything to din, din has NOOOOOOOOOOOOO REASOOOOOOOON to even listen to anything he has to say.
the really tragic thing is that because of the way they wrote mando s2, there is NO character that could have convincingly deliver that message to din. during s2, din made barely any emotional connections which is sooo funny bc this season is OVERLOADED with characters but din never has a meaningful conversation with any of them. the most meaningful connection he had in season 2 was that moment with the frog lady as she pleaded for the future of her kind and he related to it bc mandos are almost extinct too. and cobb i guess tho it was more. din monologuing at him and teaching him to be normal so it was a little bit one-sided
but from ep 3 forward... there's just nothing. they never let din have a moment with anyone, there are no connections. compare it to s1 where we saw din’s relationships with c*ra, greef and kuill evolve overtime. now they just throw people at him and expect us to care bc most of those characters come from other pieces of sw media and i know its very hypocritical of me to say this bc i love boba-- actually i have to stop i might be here for the rest of the night DFGHIDFHG I HOPE I COMMENTED ON UR ASK AT LEAST A LITTLE BIT
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In name and blood s3 ep1
ICONIC episode one of my absolute faves
excellent camera work that the episode opens with
Reid fading out of sleep to see JJ looking like an absolute angel. I’d fall in love with her too
“we were supposed to play chess” oh Reid my baby </3 I hate that Gideon left him like that
No, Haley, Hotch is not OK being off work. he’s not doing the right thing. getting suspended was not a blessing in disguise shut up
Jack is adorable.
Morgan is fuming by everyone being off work
Em couldn’t pick up the phone to JJ because she knows JJ would be able to talk her into coming back in. prove me wrong, oh you can’t? you can’t
i’ve definitely seen the blue jumper jj wears in this episode on emily
morgan being devastated over hotch leaving >>>
“look man are u a pain in my ass? yes sir but wanting to hang out with you and needing you to leave this team are two very different things”
strauss i hate you i hate you i hate you im glad u died oops i said it
emily coming in to resign from the whole FBI rather than betraying him/hotch telling her it’s a mistake/her smile </3
“it’s good to see you back. the team needs you” *pointed look at Strauss*
Emily is reckless and a badass and putting her in the bau is the worst decision strauss ever made if she wanted to control them tbh lolol 👏 👏 👏
Spence saying “has anyone talked to Emily?” 😢
Morgan hates her and I feel it
Garcia wanting to talk Hotch out of it
loving watching this episode knowing they called back to it in season 14. 15? whichever it was. also when JJ had deja vu in that ep I was also having deja vu, anyone else?
this ep feels like the first time JJ had to step into a unit chief role even though it probs should have been Morgan. like when she calls Strauss out on how she talks to the local detectives? she knows how to do her job ma’am
“agent jareau, don’t question me again” = my mum saying “I do not like that woman” no shit
oh i’ts the scene with the implication that Haley’s cheating on him!!!!! i so wish they’d gone with this storyline not because I want Aaron hurt but because i love angst and em would have been there to lick his wounds x
always thought the vic in this ep looks a lil bit like elizabeth mitchell
even as a kid, david is creepy
omg morgan has a motorola razr what a THROWBACK i had the hot pink one lol what a great phone. mine only had enough memory for like three songs but the keys used to light up so I was winning at life also i wonder how many of my followers are too young to know what a razr is
i could fall asleep listening to the honeyed tones of derek morgan’s voice honestly
who has a shower in their basement? is this a normal thing in america? america, explain.
ok but the killer in this episode is stupid attractive and it’s conflicting
i miss emily
Hotch being DAD!Hotch <3 <3 <3
no you don’t gotta think Hotch go get your girl and get on the plane please like we both know you’re going to do please and thank u
yeah the vic looks so much like elizabeth mitchell it throws me off a little bit but she also looks like someone else i can’t place
my brother things the unsub looks like scott lang (paul rudd) and he is very wrong
she could try and be a little quieter while she’s trying to escape and/or throw a chair at the window like i’m pretty sure that would break he glass and also attract some attention especially from the postal guy who walks past
aw this is the ep haley leaves hotch isn’t it maybe that’s why they didn’t go with the cheating storyline
“NO they need Gideon” shut up haley don’t demean him
you know who would never give him an ultimatum like this? emily elizabeth prentiss
haley using Jack against Hotch = not cool.
BEST SCENE EVER
emily huffing before she opens the door. letting hotch into her apartment. her mezzanine appartment >>>>>>>>>>>>>>.
the red top and the red tie
“sorry i barged in” with no intention of leaving at all
emily is mad when he suggests Strauss asked Emily to spill the dirt but like, honey, she did???????????
this is the absolute foundation of their friendship prove me wrong
“i told you, i hate politics”
“come to milwaukee. i’ll make you a deal. if your ready bag isn’t packed and ready, i’ll leave you alone. if it is, I want you on that plane with me. one more case.”
“I already turned in my badge and my gun.”
“that’s just hardware”
a god-tier scene if ever there was one
omg “talk dirty to me” and then it’s strauss i love this scene
this episode is truly underrated
Strauss did NOT just cut my girl off
legit i work in a school and this description fits so many kids it’s unreal it’s not an exaggeration how many files the clerk hands over to JJ
he’s a creepy kid but he’s also really cute and i hate when his dad hits him it makes me so sad
“I WILL NOT ALWAYS BE AROUND” is so sad is so sad
my loves are about to arrive
reid is so happy when he says “look who’s here” his lil smile makes me so soft
“how fast can you get us up to speed?”
“how fast can you sit down?”
BAU lady flirting do be like that and also Emily in the baby pink top and JJ in the baby blue top >>>>> i love colour theory
can never figure out if JJ is lying about not seeing Garcia before she left or if Garcia literally doctored it all so that Hotch and Em would come back but either way i love this team with my whole heart do you hear me
“i stepped on her hair” makes me feel sorry for Strauss
Em is still tanned i would like to point out.
reid talking about being the perfect child for a dad </3 his daddy issues make me sad
emily’s hair is so perfectly curled and it is beautiful
hotch calling Garcia out on the ‘glitches’ and thanking her in the same breath >>>>>
david bringing his dad home a victim. knowing emily kept tracks on david for years until she faked her death. its so tragic but i love that they carried on this story
jj’s make up is so early 2000s in this episode
em in cargo pants/hair up/combat boots is everything i love in the world i’m crying
“technically you’re not even in the FBI”
“all the better”
“well if i’m no longer in the FBI then you have no authority over me”
take that Strauss
david and emily’s first meeting knowing what happens years later 😭 😭 😭
emily’s maternal instincts >>>>>>>
my little brother has never seen this ep and audibly gasped when em gets the board to the head like i know right? the audacity of this man
whys it always em being hurt tho
i hate them holding the guns at David even though they have to
Morgan literally drags Em out of the way by her arm and idk why I find that so funny
JJ checking on Em >>>
there’s way more blood on her in the ambulance than there was downstairs jus saying that’s sus
“i never even told the boy to bring me this last one” they truly left the door open for a follow up episode
“none of you will ever move up the chain of command, you know that?” *cough*flash forward to Em being Unit Chief and the potential first female head of the FBI *cough*
emily ‘hates politics’ prentiss chooses apartment with a perfect view of capital hill. i head canon that it was after this episode that she moves out of that apartment and into the one she shares with Sergio
aw emily is sad and hotch is sad and strauss is sad
and now spencer is sad 💔
thanks a lot brothers crying now
we aren’t gonna talk about gideons exit mirroring the storyline of the serial killer who literally destroyed him because it’s bullshit ok
the end x
#a summary#s3 summary#in name and blood#criminal minds#incorrect criminal minds quotes#criminal minds gone wrong
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