#it’s depression and it’s hopeful and even the secret epilogue!!!!!!
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So sad that Kentucky route zero never took off on tumblr because it’s so hard to fandomfy such a work because I have so many words of analysis on this game I love it so much
#(I’ve never played it all the way through)#but it’s soooo good though#the way it lays out it’s themes the way that it intersects with almost every aspects of the humanities#like the construction of the zero as non Euclidean shapes?????#and the use of the idea of the simulacra along the zero and blurring the space between reality and fiction even within the fiction???#the meta elements the critiques of academia THE ENTERTAINMENT#all of the references as well I don’t think I will ever get every single reference the game makes#I’m trying to write and comprehensive essay on it and I’ve got 1600 words already on a just a single part#it’s depression and it’s hopeful and even the secret epilogue!!!!!!#the death of the hired man being ambiguous in the end humanity wins in the face of tragedy!!!!#I even wrote about how the games ends on the imagery of a pair of horses called the neighbours in a grave#even in death you find community and companionship#the delivery being completed for Conway????#like also if you view it through the lens of Conway the fame is a tragedy but the game goes on after Conway leaves#people go on despite everything!!!!!#I can’t this game is so good go play it#kentucky route zero#kr0
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Destiel Trope Collection 2024 | Day 1: Angst with a happy ending
,,Me too." | @tami-ryver
Rating: Teen & Up
Word Count: 1,748
Main Tags/Warnings: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Case Fic, Hunt Gone Wrong, Werewolves, Hurt Dean Winchester, Hurt Sam Winchester, Major Character Injury, Hurt Castiel (Supernatural), Castiel's Angelic Grace (Supernatural), Angelic Grace (Supernatural), AngstAngst with a Happy Ending, Blood and Injury, Blood, Fictober 2023
Summary: The silence is unbearable. Not even insects can be heard in the darkness, not even moon shines down on their path. The only source of light they have are the flashlights they took from the Impala. Armed with silver knives and the demon knife, they walk deep in the darkness of the forest, in search of the place where the massacre took place.
I Want You to Know That I'm Awake (I Hope That You're Asleep) | @starstiels
Rating: Teen & Up
Word Count: 2,192
Main Tags/Warnings: depressed!dean (heavily implied), post-canon, grief/mourning, hurt/comfort, first kiss, selectively mute dean, mental health issues, panic attack
Summary: Dean Winchester wants to cry. He wants to scream and yell and sob until his lungs give out and his eyes sting like needles.
The Covert Identity (WIP) | @rowanspn
Rating: Mature
Word Count: 4,623 (22,561 updated)
Main Tags/Warnings: Alternate Universe- No Supernatural, FBI Agent Dean Winchester, FBI Agent Sam Winchester, Florist Castiel (Supernatural), Crime Boss Lucifer (Supernatural), Kid Fic, Kid Jack Kline, Blood and Violence, Graphic depictions of violence
Summary: Dean Winchester loves his job; working as a secret agent has its perks. There is nothing quite like the thrill of saving people and hunting down criminals. And with his baby brother Sammy at his side, it’s a family business. However, when he and Sam are assigned to the case of Lucien Shurley, a suspected crime lord with a rap sheet a mile long, Dean’s semi-predictable life takes a turn for the unprecedented and over complicated. He and Sam must go undercover to investigate Lucien’s own family, his brothers Gabriel and Castiel, and his young son, Jack, to find out just how involved they truly are. As the stakes rise and the body count follows, it is up to Sam and Dean to solve the greatest mystery of their careers; who is Castiel Novak and what does he know?
he's gonna take my files | @autisticandroids
Rating: Explicit
Word Count: 6,191
Main Tags/Warnings: Dean Saves Cas from the Empty, Afterlife, Triangulation of Desire, Memories, Trauma, Hurt Cas, Canon Divergent, Canon Remix, Warnings in Author's Note
Summary: Dean goes to the Empty, where Cas is floating through his memories.
when doves cry | @watchinghimrakeleaves
Rating: Teen & Up
Word Count: 6,821
Main Tags/Warnings: Human Castiel, Season/Series 09, Not Canon Compliant, Winchester Coping Mechanisms, Angst with a Happy Ending
Summary: When Dean asks Cas to leave the bunker, all he can do is hope that the fallen angel is safe and doing okay. But when he reaches out to Cas to check in, he's surprised by the anger he's met with. Forced to consider whether or not he made the right call, Dean must reckon with how to fix things between him and the man he worries he may have lost forever.
Forest Fever | @amaranthhiding
Rating: Explicit
Word Count: 8,586
Main Tags/Warnings: Canon Universe, Post-Ep 12x10, Monster of the Week, Hallucinations, Injured Castiel, Protective Dean, (Emotional) Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Sex, Praying, Angel Grace, Humor (mostly in the epilogue)
Summary: After the crushing events of episode 12x10 "Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets", Castiel is low on grace and morale. In an attempt to restore at least one of these two, Sam and Dean take him on a hunt. Things start going wrong when Sam gets injured and Cas seemingly disappears. They get worse when Dean turns from hunter to prey for something feeling far more at home in this dark, rainy forest than he does.
Send Me a Postcard | @blessyourhondahurley
Rating: Teen & Up
Word Count: 10,387
Main Tags/Warnings: Castiel is Saved from the Empty, First Kiss, References to Depression, Bisexual Dean Winchester
Summary: Shortly after his rescue from the Empty, Cas hits the road late one night without telling anyone he's leaving. Two weeks later, a postcard arrives for Dean.
whisper your name without making a noise | @deancaskiss
Rating: Teen & Up
Word Count: 12,577
Main Tags/Warnings: Dean Winchester, Castiel (Supernatural), Sam Winchester, Eileen Leahy, Muteness, Mute Dean Winchester, traumatic mutism, Mutism, Major Character Undeath, Dean Winchester to the Rescue, Dean Winchester Saves Castiel from the Empty, Dean Winchester Saves Castiel, Pining, POV Dean Winchester, Kissing, Boys Kissing, French Kissing, Rough Kissing, Gentle Kissing, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff and Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Romance, Drinking to Cope, Drinking Alcohol, Castiel/Dean Winchester First Kiss, Getting Together, Dean Winchester is Not Okay, Happy Ending, Post-Canon, Post-Season/Series 15, Fix-It, Character Death Fix, First Kiss, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Romantic Fluff, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Castiel/Dean Winchester UST, Castiel and Dean Winchester Have a Profound Bond, Dean Winchester Loves Castiel, Castiel Loves Dean Winchester, Dean Winchester Takes Care of Castiel, The Empty (Supernatural), the handprint, Dean Winchester's Jacket
Summary: Losing Cas to the Empty felt like Dean was losing a piece of himself. I love you, Cas had said; and then he was gone before Dean got the chance to tell Cas how he felt. But Cas might have taken more than just Dean’s heart when the Empty ripped him away. Cas is gone, and so is Dean’s voice. Traumatic mutism: according to Sam and Eileen, Dean had been through a traumatic experience losing Cas and now he was mute. So, Eileen taught Dean sign language, and Sam bought notebooks for Dean to write out his thoughts. But Dean never stopped aching for Cas; praying to him every day and searching for a way to bring Cas home. When Dean finds a way into Empty, it’s a fight like he’s never fought before. Scream, Dean, scream, the Empty taunts. But Dean can’t stop until he’s rescued Cas, kissed his angel breathless, and told Cas the truth about how he feels—voice or no voice.
Taking one for the team | @artichokegarden
Rating: Explicit
Word Count: 16,846
Main Tags/Warnings: Case Fic, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Stanford Era, Sex Worker Dean Winchester, Dubious Consent, Voyeurism, Kink Negotiation, Kink Discovery, Praise Kink, BDSM, Spanking, Whipping, Bath Sex, Hair Washing, John Winchester's A+ Parenting, Abusive John Winchester, Established Castiel/Dean Winchester, POV Castiel, Angst with a Happy Ending, Porn with Feelings
Summary: Cas blinked slowly. “Your father sent you to his friend’s sex club as bait for a sex monster. And you want me to find your lost memories of this for you?”
“Don’t you start, Cas. We need to find out what happened, or those women are as good as dead. If I wanted to listen to a load of crap about dad’s parenting choices, I’d have told all this to Sam in the first place, instead of biting his head off for asking. Let’s just agree he wasn’t winning father of the year for this one and let it go, okay?”
When women start going missing from sex clubs, Cas investigates Dean's memories of a Stanford-Era case and finds some secrets there that could help their relationship in the present.
this bitter nightcall | @abi-cosmos
Rating: Explicit
Word Count: 32,514
Main Tags/Warnings: Djinn curse, Jealous Dean Winchester, Hallucinations, Unreliable narrator, Heavy angst, Implied Castiel/Mick Davies, Inappropriate smut, Dean doesn't know what's real, Love confessions, Post-season 12, Very brief almost major character death, Hurt/Comfort, Case fic, True love's kiss
Summary: Dean gets touched by a djinn, but it's all cool. Or, is it?
Forced to confront his desires, Dean's grip on reality slips. Leaving Castiel, Sam, and Mick Davies trying to find a way to save him before it’s too late.
If only they knew that the cure is right in front of them.
Gracefully Yours, Always | @thefandomsinhalor
Rating: Teen & Up
Word Count: 39,815
Main Tags/Warnings: Canon Divergent, Episode: S09E10, Hurt Castiel, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Temporary Blindness, Angelic Grace, Hurt Dean
Summary: As Dean hopelessly waits for Gadreel and Crowley to be expelled from Sam’s body, he and Castiel are unexpectedly ambushed by Malachi and the remainder of his soldiers, seeking retribution for what Castiel has done to his faction. Because Castiel gets gravely injured in the fight, Dean resists the urge to isolate himself, and instead returns to the bunker with his friend and Sam, determined to put an end to the fallen angel madness, and also, perhaps, try to understand why, after everything he’s done, Castiel still stands by his side.
Still Waters Run Deep | @thisisapaige
Rating: Explicit
Word Count: 41,168
Main Tags/Warnings: Canon Divergent After s15e09 The Trap, Hurt/Comfort, Mute Castiel, Mark of Cain, Aquaphobia, Claustrophobia, Top Castiel/Bottom Dean Winchester
Summary: In the darkest depths of the ocean, sealed into the ma'lak box with Chuck trapped behind the Mark, Castiel loses the battle against God's rage. When Sam and Dean find Castiel on a dark patch of highway— the Mark missing and his grace weak— he cannot speak.
It rains. It rains and it rains and it rains. It is a Great Flood.
In order to stop God, save the world, and resolve the issues simmering between them for years, Castiel and Dean need to communicate.
Perhaps they should build an ark instead.
When I Knew You | @friendofcarlotta
Rating: Explicit
Word Count: 54,272
Main Tags/Warnings: Modern AU, Time Travel, Bartender Dean Winchester, Editor Castiel, Mutual Pining, Minor Character Death, Bottom Castiel/Top Dean Winchester, Top Castiel/Bottom Dean Winchester, Incorrect Science, Social Anxiety, Sharing a Bed
Summary: Shortly after moving into his new house, Dean Winchester finds a strange, flickering light in the middle of his living room. When he touches it, he’s transported two years into the past, to the days when a man named Castiel Novak lived in the house.
Dean’s own time pulls him back eventually, but the gateway to the past keeps appearing, and Dean keeps visiting Cas — sometimes for minutes, sometimes for hours. They soon fall in love, but there is no possible future for them, for one simple reason: in a few weeks, Cas is supposed to die.
As the date of Cas’ death draws closer, will Dean be able to save his life? And if he does… will the two of them find a way to be together in the same time?
On the flip side | Joysprings (AO3)
Rating: Teen & Up
Word Count: 64,357
Main Tags/Warnings: Lgbtq, Polyamorous characters, Blood and Injury, Time Jumps, Neurodivergence, Autistic Castiel, Emotional Abuse, Pilot Dean Winchester, Writer Castiel, Grief and Mourning, Temporary Character Death, Domestic Destiel, Dean and Cas are dad's, Angst, Fluff, Happy Ending I Promise,
Summary: A little over a year after airforce test pilot Dean Winchester's plane crashes and goes missing, its finally found. Castiel Winchester, Dean's widowed husband reflects on his grief and his memory re visits the most significant points of their relationship throughout their time together and how they shaped the present. The whole family is left to deal with the resurfaced trauma from the initial accident, and will finally learn about what truly happened, uncovering new and unexpected answers. This is their journey.
(Story will alternate chapters from the present to past time stamps)
the weight of your bones | Chi_Yagami (Ao3)
Rating: Mature
Word Count: 66,780
Main Tags/Warnings: afterlife, soulmates (sort of), canon divergent, hunter Dean Winchester, human Castiel, kid Jack Kline, angst with a happy ending, touch-starved, flashbacks/discussions of death, panic attacks
Summary: After rescuing his brother's fiancée from a house fire he doesn't survive, Dean Winchester finds himself in Heaven. He's immediately suspicious—after all, with everything he's done during his time on Earth... there's no way he deserves to be here. He lives in a beautiful neighborhood right down the street from his parents, in an amazing house that he shares with his new soulmate, Cas—a man Dean's never even met. Despite Dean's best efforts to keep his distance, Cas seems determined to make their new relationship work in the afterlife.
However, Cas doesn't understand... he isn't aware of Dean's past. Cas doesn't know that all Dean's good for is destroying relationships and ganking monsters. Cas doesn't know that Dean once got an innocent civilian killed on a case, doesn't know of the cave that haunts Dean's dreams. People are made of memories they bury or live by, and Dean chose to bury his a long time ago.
But as Cas chips away at Dean's resistance... the once-forgotten bones begin to surface.
When Tomorow Comes | @teeparadigm67
Rating: Explicit
Word Count: 78,994
Main Tags/Warnings: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Fix-It, Season 15 rewrite, Canon-Typical Violence, Hurt/Comfort, Mutual Pining, Angst, Lots of Angst, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Dean Winchester Loves Castiel, Castiel Loves Dean Winchester, Eventual Smut, Eventual Romance, Eventual Happy Ending, Sad with a Happy Ending, Dean Winchester Saves Castiel from the Empty (kind of), Dean Winchester is Protective of Castiel, Dean Winchester is Saved, First Time, Castiel Saves Dean Winchester, Love Confessions, Castiel's Loss of Angelic Grace, Dean Winchester in the Empty, First Kiss, The World is Saved, Smut, Fluff and Smut, Angst with a Happy Ending, Dean Winchester's Taste in Music, Sharing a Bed, Frottage, Men of Letters Bunker, Castiel/Dean Winchester in the Men of Letters Bunker, Happy Ending, Alternate Season/Series 15, Season/Series 15
Summary: When hunting for the Leviathan blossom, Castiel gets taken. Tired, desperate and wanting to tell him all the things left unsaid before it’s too late, Dean prays to him. But he realises... standing there, in the grey hellish landscape, the portal home flickering just beside them with seconds left on the timer, they're already were too late.
Running himself ragged fuelled solely by caffeine, whisky, and that trademark Winchester determination, he will find a way to stop Chuck and to save Cas. However, this isn't the blaze of glory Dean had always envisioned going out in. But, deep down, he would go out swinging to save a loved one. Those bright shining penetrating tear-soaked eyes are the last thing he sees before his vision is marred, the desperate plea of his name dampened by the black ooze filling his eardrums as the essence of the Empty wraps around him and pulls him pulled from existence into the dark.
All because of that simple prayer, the ending Chuck had always planned was rewritten.
The Unbroken | @casblackfeathers
Rating: Explicit
Word Count: 126,551
Main Tags/Warnings: zombie apocalypse, bed sharing, hurt and comfort, angel castiel, protective dean, soft dean, endverse, bamf castiel, bottom dean
Summary: Dean’s life had been made of running. He ran from a curse that had desolated his life ever since he was a child — whenever he got hurt, he turned into a goddamn human-torch, killing everyone around him — and he ran from himself and his own self-loathing.
But managing all that at the end of a world full of Croats lurking around every corner was easier said than done.
Until a mysterious man with tousled dark hair paired with blue eyes as clear as the sky during a hot summer’s day stopped him from free falling, literally. In one fell swoop, the stranger had not only saved his life but also calmed the wildfire threatening to burn everything in its wake.
There was something about Castiel that made Dean want to stop running but also hid something darker — something Dean couldn’t quite put his finger on. And between soft, pillowy lips and feather-like fingerprints, Cas could very well shatter Dean’s world and maybe help save the whole world in return.
Fortunate Son (WIP) | @friendofcarlotta
Rating: Explicit
Word Count: 128,610
Main Tags/Warnings: Alternate Universe - 1960s, Vietnam War, Character Death (but no MCD), Blood and Injury, Counterculture, Recreational Drug Use, Mutual Pining, Top Castiel/Bottom Dean Winchester, Period-Typical Homophobia, Coming Out, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Getting Back Together, Suicidal Thoughts
Summary: The year is 1966, the place is Kansas, and Dean Winchester and Castiel Novak are falling in love. But with Castiel under the thumb of his conservative parents and Dean set to ship out to Vietnam, there is no possible future for them.
As Castiel’s life turns upside down and the hell of Vietnam threatens to swallow Dean’s soul, it will take everything they have to find their way back to each other. But some things are worth waiting — and fighting — for.
#destiel trope collection#destiel trope collection 2024#angst with a happy ending#destiel#fanfic#supernatural
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Hunt x Nesta - Epilogue
Life sucked.
Hunt could split his life into two chapters: before Nesta and after Nesta. Both chapters sucked. But that little blip in the middle – the one week where life had been better than he ever expected was good. He’d always have that.
‘Stop moping, my goodness.’
Isaiah groaned from his desk then dropped his forehead onto the cheap wood.
‘Everything reminds me of her,’ Hunt replied, holding up a sugar sachet from the crappy coffee machine.
It was true. Hunt could draw a correlation to Nesta regardless of the topic; she liked it, she would have hated it, he wished he could show her it, they’d tried it.
He had loved Shahar but it had been intense from the start. The rebellion had intensified every moment of it, pushing them both towards a zenith that he free-fell from. Losing her was different. It was a loss that held finality – but Hunt had lost so many that day, had suffered so much as a result, the grief had been for Shahar and all the others who'd fought alongside him.
To Shahar, he had been Hunt, a powerful angel plucked from the bowels of Pangea to command her legions.
This was different.
To Nesta, he’d only ever been Orion. Grumpy, sleepy, teasing, serious, or goofy, she’d wanted all of him. And Nesta wasn’t dead but it would have hurt less if she was.
Night after night, Hunt scoured the internet on any whiff of something similar to the Horn to try and find a way back to her. He’d deal with breeches and no hair dryer if it meant they were together again. He’d even wondered if Ruhn Danaan would know anything about another fae relic because Isaiah couldn’t be persuaded to get another warrant to search the Autumn King’s home for hidden artefacts.
‘I know that you miss her, Hunt, but it’s just not possible to find her again,’ he said calmly.
Those same words had been said to him a month earlier, also by Isaiah, when he’d found Hunt deliberating in the street. He’d gathered is hard-earned coins ready to dump them all in the Astronomer’s lap so that he’d use his mystics to locate her. In the end, it proved too risky. Hunt wouldn’t dare to expose Nesta that way.
‘It fucking sucks,’ replied Hunt before shuffling back to his desk for a long night of paperwork.
When Nesta left, Hunt expected a depression to come and drown him. He’d been there before and it always lurked in his periphery. But she’d given him hope and it felt different. The light didn’t abate in her absence; the flame remained burning. So he worked and worked. Did what Micah asked. Treaded every single line without complaint. And he thought of her. Thought of her smile, her curiosity, the way she had him wrapped around her finger in a single day.
***
‘What now?’
Emerie’s brown eyes had dulled from their week of absolute hell. She sat on the cushioned windowsill of the river estate with mud still caked over her face. Nesta looked down at her own hands. They were splattered with a mix of blood. Some was hers, Cassian’s, Bellius’, and Feyre’s.
Her stomach was empty enough that it hurt. She’d see a healer soon. Gwyn had the worst injuries so was with Madja in a separate room.
A small cry rang out down the hall from the baby boy, Nyx.
Feyre had died. Her heart had stopped beating. Nesta had felt the whole world turn colder, felt the knife coming for Feyre’s thread, so Nesta did the only thing she could think of. Still beaten and ruined from the Blood Rite, she gave her power back. She gave it all back.
And Feyre lived. The boy lived.
Nesta wedged her aching body into the windowsill next to Emerie, wishing they were a different set of wings cradling her shoulders.
It had been a tough few months since her little jaunt to Lunathion.
To his credit, Lucien did not speak of what he saw. He simply pretended the entire event had never happened and acted with all the quality of one the males from Fangs and Bangs when it was discovered by the others that Nesta had returned. It was their secret, never to be mentioned. She was grateful for that.
None ever questioned her moroseness because it was no different to her capricious ways. She could feel herself pushing everybody away, as always, week after week without Hunt’s infectious joy. The idea of Cassian touching her churned her stomach. She’d put an end to it, dumbfounding him. And when her sister’s family had convinced her to seduce Eris through dance, it confirmed to Nesta that all she would ever be was a pawn to be used for their benefit. When Eris had shown interest, Nesta had considered it if only to have a lifeline out of the Night Court.
‘I don’t even know if it will work,’ Nesta said quietly, tilting her head to touch Emerie’s.
The pair of them absolutely reeked. Being dragged from their beds and dumped onto Ramiel for a week would do that. Only sheer grit and hoping had kept them alive. That, and Gwyn bringing a beast to slaughter eight of the Illyrians.
‘It’s worth a try,’ replied Emerie.
They’d huddled together in the dark, cold and tired but not willing to sleep. And Nesta had told Emerie and Gwyn everything about the male she’d found in Lunathion. How she could not even go an hour without thinking of him, without imagining a life together. They’d listened with rapture, delighted for her as true friends were. Even when she cried at the thought of leaving them behind, they encouraged her to take her chance if they made it out alive because they loved her enough to let her go and find happiness.
‘It’s complicated.’
‘What’s complicated? Toot the horn and fly off with your angel.’
Gwyn limped into the room in her filthy clothes. ‘Who’s tooting? Are we tooting?’
‘Nesta’s about to go to the future with her angel lover.’
Instead of indignation, colour heated her cheeks and she felt like a giggling, love-struck fool. ‘He is so handsome.’
The cell phone had died quickly from all the moments that Nesta had spent agonising over photos of the Umbra Mortis in his boxers, as he called them.
‘So we have heard,’ Emerie replied drily.
Nesta shoved her heart back into its cage. ‘It’s impossible. I’ve surrendered my power. The Horn won’t work. Hunt is a slave. It’s been almost four months. He could be sold by now to another owner.’
‘Then buy him back,’ urged Gwyn.
‘With what?’
Emerie braced a hand against her ribs as she stood. ‘Well, the High Lord did offer you anything for saving their lives.’
‘No,’ she said firmly. ‘Rhysand would never agree to let me go, much less give me a pile of his wealth to send me on way. They still think Cassian is my mate. That the bond will snap. If it didn’t snap when Briallyn had him try to kill me, it never will – and I thank the stars for that.’
The words hung heavy. It had been one horrific moment after the other. Cassian bellowing at her on a bridge crossing the Sidra that she was his, despite her refusals. Morrigan delivering her to Emerie and Gwyn as she trembled. Waking disorientated in the Blood Rite. Staring down Bellius as she held Ramiel’s pass. Briallyn controlling Cassian with the Crown, trying to kill her. Only the Mask coming to her rescue again had saved her life.
‘I made a list the other day of all the things I’d like to do in Prythian. Do you know what I wrote?’ At her friends’ expectant faces, she continued, ‘Finish my book. I have no desires or dreams here. I am simply an object.’
‘What did you write for the other side?’
The corners of her mouth twitched. ‘So many things. There are things I want to do that I don’t even know exist yet. I want to go to the amusement park with Hunt. To study. I’d study for my whole life. I want to throw my cap in the air when I’ve finished studying. I want to live with Orion – I want a life with him like I’ve never dreamed of a male before. I didn’t kiss him enough.’
‘It was not only the High Lord’s life you saved, Nesta,’ Emerie reminded her. ‘There is a High Lady of the Night Court.’
***
Silver light poured into the room like molten metal, so bright that Hunt needed to shield his eyes from the glare.
A low, hissing noise had him scurrying from his bed and pressing his wings to the cream wall in anticipation.
‘What the fuck.’
The wall opposite was flooded with a silver fire that chilled him to the bone. The narrow window above his bed frosted over. On his exhale, his breath was visible.
Then she was there.
The fire fell away, revealing an ornate library with rows of leather-bound books. Light streamed in from the massive bay windows, bathing Nesta in its glow. Like the first day that Hunt had seen her, Nesta was other-worldly. Instead of tight leathers that sinfully kissed every curve, she wore a pale lavender dress with a square-cut neckline. Her hands were buried in the long sleeves although Hunt spotted the tip of the horn poking from beneath. The draping skirts couldn’t hide the sneakers that she’d bought in Lunathion and declared the comfiest shoes she’d ever tried.
‘Tell me I’m dreaming,’ Hunt murmured.
Twice, Nesta’s lips parted then sealed again. Tears rimmed her grey eyes.
‘Nesta,’ he said, stepping closer to the fiery portal. The hairs on his arm stood from the seeping cold that surrounded it.
A soft gasp emitted from her side and two females came into view, ushered into the library by the same male he’d seen months ago with red hair and a metallic eye. One cradled a baby to her chest. This had to be Feyre; she had the unmistakeable look of her older sister although freckles dotted across the bridge of her nose and her hair hung freely. A swirling, black tattoo covered the hand that stroked her son’s wings. The other female was darker haired with large brown eyes reminding Hunt of a faun.
‘It worked?’ Feyre asked.
‘Obviously,’ the male replied, making Elain giggle and cover her mouth to hide it.
Hunt took another step closer to Nesta who was still immobilised. In the chairs behind her were two more females. Hunt had heard all about them. The winged one was Emerie and the red-haired one was Gwyn. Nesta’s face had lit up as she spoke of her only friends in Prythian when they’d been together.
‘Hey, Starlight,’ he said, reaching his hand through to her side. He jerked his chin towards her sister and the baby. ‘They made it.’
‘They made it,’ Nesta repeated, face twisting with emotion. ‘I gave up my power for them. I didn’t know if this would still work. I had to choose between seeing you again and saving them.’
‘And everybody won,’ he said, grasping her shaking hand.
It took every instinct not to haul her through to his side and kiss her until every star went out.
Nesta did that for him.
From the force that she yanked him to her, Hunt was practically falling. His hands found her waist to steady himself and he could feel her breath on his cheek as he pulled himself upright. Their bodies knocked together, the softness of her curves feeling like home.
‘I missed you.’
‘There has been nobody to laugh with.’ He touched his forehead to hers. ‘There was a national crisis because demand for ice cream plummeted since you left.’
When Hunt moved to kiss her, he stilled. There were markings on her neck, a fresh cut that still had the scab on her cheek and more wounds on her hands. They had to be recent because fae healed as fast as malakim.
‘What the Hel has happened? Are you alright? Who hurt you?’
The two females in the chair exchanged a glance then he noticed that both of them had been wounded recently too. Emerie had a bruise above her eyebrow that caused the lid to swell and Gwyn’s hands were bound in bandages.
‘It’s alright,’ Nesta murmured, holding his hands in hers. ‘Something happened. I was taken. The three of us. We woke in the Blood Rite.’
‘I don’t know what that is.’
Surprising him, Nesta broke into a laugh. It skittered over his skin like static.
‘What’s funny?’
‘That’s what I say to you, Orion.’
The male, Lucien, cleared his throat from his post at the door. ‘Nesta, I don’t know how long it will be open – or until they notice.’
‘Right,’ she said, nodding. ‘It was hell. All of it. That week on the mountain and all the months before. All I wanted was you. I told my friends that if we survived, if we made it through each night, I would find you.’
From the three-legged table, Nesta picked up a rolled-up piece of parchment. There was a line down the middle, splitting it into two columns. In an elegant script, lines upon lines of text had been written.
‘I wrote why I should stay here or why I should leave. There is danger on both sides, uncertainty, and it feels like leaping into the unknown. This is the world I know. My sisters are here. But the difference is in Lunathion, I will have you. And that makes all the difference, Hunt.’ She clutched the paper tighter. ‘I don’t care. All I want is you.’
When his day began, Hunt didn’t have Nesta appearing and offering him a forever on his bingo card. He blew out a breath. ‘Nesta, I’m a slave. I can’t give you a home. I don’t even know who my father is. If you want a life of comfort, you’re better off with Tristan Flynn.’
There was a brilliant shine of determination in her eyes. ‘I want a male who will love me.’
He’d loved her the moment she’d dropped out of the sky and told Isaiah she was a bard. These months without her had felt like living without the sun. He’d do another two hundred years in gorsian shackles strung up in the Asteri’s dungeon rather than spend another moment without Nesta.
Hunt stepped back through the portal to his room in the barracks and pulled out a prospectus for Crescent City University along with guidance on how to apply for funding. He’d gathered them just in case Nesta ever came back. He’d pulled legislation on the minimal rights of slaves. As long as Hunt answered when called, slaves could rent a property – they couldn’t own it, but it was a start, so he’d saved every penny of his pitiful wages, took double shifts and worked on his allotted days off to scrape together a few more coins because Nesta had given him that piece of hope that he hadn’t had before.
On the desk, there was photo album that he’d been compiling. It had provided an outlet instead of moping. Hunt had channelled all of his dreams into it.
‘There’s still space for more,’ he said, stepping back through and handing it to Nesta.
Her sisters and the other females peered over her shoulder at it. Every single photo that Nesta had taken on her cell and his, no matter how blurred, had been printed out and stuck in with his terrible handwriting beneath with a caption. Hunt had written about their day, about what she’d said, where they’d been or what they’d eaten. There was one of her bending down with the Istros in the background as Hunt had tried to get a scurrying otter in shot with her – but ended up with a smear of brown and yellow flopping into the river.
‘You look in pain there,’ said Elain, pointing to one.
‘She couldn’t decide on a milkshake flavour.’
Nesta’s lips quirked as she looked at the photo. ‘I regret banana.’
‘Is that why you drank mine?’
There were photos of him too. Ones she had taken. Ones that were blurry or zoomed in too far or ones in the elevator when she discovered that she could use the mirror to capture both of them. One of him with his fluffed-up wings and that rotten witch-ink halo on full display. One of them snuggled up on the bed on a pile of pillows. Lots of them together; Nesta appearing regal and poised whilst he looked surly or goofy to annoy her. One of Nesta in her gown before the ballet with Ruhn that she’d taken of herself in the bathroom mirror. A few of her when she’d put a cat-eared filter on and couldn’t work out how to take it off. Some even of Ruhn when he was driving, trying to block the camera with his tattooed hand.
‘I thought that was Rhys.’
Nesta chuckled, ‘So did I – and I gave him hell for it.’
‘They’re coming,’ said Lucien from the window where he’d been observing the skies. ‘They’ve likely felt the shift in the wards.’
On the horizon, three black shapes were moving quicker, wings beating rapidly.
Nesta turned to him, silver eyes shining with hope. ‘Will you have me?’
‘You were mine the day you fell from the stars. I love you. You think I make photo albums for every girl that lands in the middle of the road?’
Nesta silenced him with a kiss that surprised everybody in the room.
‘My bags are packed. I’ve already said goodbye.’
‘You’ll have to flirt with Flynn to get his credit card again,’ he said, grimacing slightly. ‘It will be centuries until I can afford somewhere for us to live.’
Feyre shook her head. ‘Finances are handled.’
‘I’m paying for your freedom,’ Nesta said resolutely. ‘There may only be one Umbra Mortis but I’m the bitch who stole from the Cauldron. That has to count for something.’
What she was, was a pillar of steel that could never be broken. Hunt didn’t care if she was sharp or unyielding, she was his Nesta. His girl from the stars.
Hunt slid his hands to her face, kissing her deeply. He didn’t care if her sisters watched. Didn’t care if the winged female whistled loudly at them. He had waited months to feel her again, to hold her.
‘We need to go,’ Nesta urged.
The two females had moved back to the chairs and exchanged a glance as the roof shook. A heavy landing. Feyre clutched her son to her chest, eyes going vacant as if listening to something else.
Three bags had been prepared and neatly tucked beneath the table. On her direction, Hunt hauled them up and through the portal back into the barracks. The final one tested his strength. It was bulky and ridiculously heavy, but with five females watching him, Hunt pretended the weight didn’t surprise him even if his muscles strained.
‘Are you bringing your Harp, bard?’
‘No. Only the Horn to close it then we’ll destroy it.’
Hunt pretended he didn’t just hear Nesta declare that she was about to break a priceless fae artefact that would have Einar Danaan, Micah, and the Asteri string her up from a dungeon for touching it.
They were doing this.
A cold sweat rippled down his back. They were really doing this. In the face of an archangel, a fae prince, and whatever the Asteri were, Hunt and Nesta were doing this for real.
His fingers enclosed around her wrists as steps grew closer. ‘Are you sure? You’ve known me a week.’
‘I have the rest of my life to know you,’ she said, before kissing him tenderly again. ‘Orion Athalar, you are my home. Maybe I fell that day, rattling the stars, because I was searching for you.’
The door swung open and shadows flooded in, sweeping the rugs of the library like a tidal wave that could no longer be held back. The first male had slicked back black hair and sparkling eyes so blue they appeared violet.
‘Shit, he does look like Ruhn,’ said Hunt.
In a soft voice, he said, ‘What is this?’
Two more males filed in, taking care to manoeuvre their large, leathery wings through the wooden doorway. These were the Illyrians she had spoken of which meant one was Azriel, who’d handed her a bag too heavy for her to manage, and the other was Cassian, a male who Hunt would delight in hurting.
Immediately, Hunt catalogued the subtle changes in Nesta. Whilst he would have expected her spine to go straighter, her chin to lift in defiance, instead Nesta curled in on herself as if she was deflating. Her shoulders hunched, making herself smaller and a flat, empty expression took up residence on her pale face.
The high lord’s eyes flashed to the Horn in Nesta’s hands. With a jolt of magic that Hunt felt fire across the room, he tried to lurch the Made item from her grip but it stayed firmly in her hand.
‘You have opened a portal to another world,’ he said, voice low and edged with warning. ‘You are endangering the lives of everybody in this city, Nesta. Endangering my mate and our son.’
Hunt couldn’t take it. It was as if all of the air was being pressed from the room. The two Illyrian sentries stood silent either side of their high lord in a display of cruel dominance. Neither would speak for Nesta. Hunt looked again to the females. Her two sisters were mute. The red-haired male had taken a not-so-subtle step closer to Elain, an arm extending ready to shield her. The other two females were as pale and timid as Nesta had become in their chairs; the winged one settled a hand on Gwyneth’s knee in reassurance as shadows lashed at the walls.
These fae pricks.
‘Who the fuck do you think you are?’
The urge to let his lightning loose was an instinct that proved difficult to deny – but not when Nesta was in the firing line, nor a child and a male with a metal eye that would send his lightning haywire.
The high lord blinked in disbelief then took a step closer to Nesta.
Lightning wreathed his hands in response. ‘Don’t even fucking think about it.’
‘If it hits Nesta?’
Hunt could play that game. He went into the place where Micah sent him where it was cold and empty. ‘If it hits your son? Your mate?’
He let the static tighten the room so strands of their hair rose. Hunt pulled the clouds closer, bringing in a storm from the mountains which darkened the room. Rain pattered upon the glass.
The male to the high lord’s left tilted his head, back hair falling across his pensive face. The blue stones on his leathers pulsed. ‘What are you?’
‘He’s not Peregryn,’ the male with red stones said.
He kept his brown eyes fixed on the threats in the room while he spoke softly to Nesta. ‘Go through, Starlight. We’ll go to the movies tonight. I realised you never tasted popcorn.’
The weight of her decision pressed on her. That, or the arrogant bastards shooting daggers at her.
‘We can make out on the back row too.’
That shifted something in Nesta, like the final screw coming loose. She exhaled with relief and edged towards him. Hunt stretched out his arm towards her to sweep his love behind him, behind his wings, so she could step through safely to the barracks as if they were negotiating the transfer of a hostage.
‘Baby, can you get my gun? It’s in the holster at the bottom of the bed.’
With a trembling hand, Nesta placed the gun in the hand that was outstretched behind himself. Magic was great, but nothing could quite replace a steel kiss. Hunt cocked his weapon, keeping it trained on the high lord.
‘Which one’s Cassian?’
Likely the male whose face was purpling as he stared at Hunt like he wanted to wrap his hands around his throat. Join the club, buddy, Hunt thought.
‘The red stones?’
None in the room gave an acknowledgement to his words. He didn’t want this to turn into a standoff but now that Hunt was here, facing the bastards who’d made Nesta’s life a misery for the last couple of years, he couldn’t resist being a dick. The Umbra Mortis had earned his reputation. He’d survived torture and a failed rebellion. And he was going to have a beautiful future with his gorgeous Nesta – but first, these males needed to atone.
‘Listen, these ladies look as if they’ve seen enough violence so I’ll refrain from blasting your brains out on these lovely rugs, but you owe my girl an apology.’ Over his shoulder, Hunt asked, ‘Does Lucien need to say sorry?’
‘Hunt, don’t bother. Let’s just close it.’
‘Does Lucien need to say sorry?’ he repeated.
Nesta gave a sigh. ‘No. Lucien is fine.’
‘Good male,’ he said, offering a slight wink in the scarred-one’s direction.
A shadow that had been creeping along the skirting board made to lunge towards him but Hunt hit it with a bolt of lightning that crippled it. The male who’d bejazzled his leathers with blue stones winced as if he felt the blow too. Aha, that was the shadowsinger. Red stones was the prick who couldn’t keep his dick in his pants.
‘Alright, here’s what’s going to happen. You’re going to say sorry to Nesta then I’m leaving with her. We’re going to have a beautiful life together and never come back to this place again.’ Hunt gave a dramatic sigh. ‘If I’m honest, I think it’s less about my company and more about the fact you three have made her life so miserable here that she's willing to leave.’
‘That’s not true,’ Nesta called, and he caught the slight playful edge in her tone. ‘I want to go to university too.’
Little minx.
The three males were carved from stone. Every now and then, Hunt felt something trying to edge towards his mind like a tendril of smoke but his lightning zapped it without thought.
‘My finger is getting really sweaty holding back this trigger.’
The gun wasn’t even loaded – safety protocol – but if these fae were as clueless as Nesta had been, they’d have no idea.
‘Nesta, I am sorry that we did not extend the same warmth to you as we did to your sisters. I’m truly sorry that after the war, we were not a support for you.’
‘Well done, blue stones. Next one.’
The high lady shuffled the baby who was growing restless in her arms. ‘Is this necessary?’
‘Yes. Next question.’
Hunt lashed his lightning towards the males’ feet, making them leap back a step. Damn, he wished he recorded the sudden bloom of fear on their arrogant faces.
‘I’m sorry that I loved you,’ Cassian said. ‘I’m sorry that I gave you everything I could and it still wasn’t enough. Nes, what are you doing? In this life, we can have our time together. Think of our future.’
‘Didn’t you make her walk until she collapsed?’
The male blanched. ‘It was for her own good.’
‘No,’ Hunt uttered, pinching the bridge of his nose. ‘I can't do this. I need to go before I shoot you.’
Behind him, Nesta’s snort of laughter was the confirmation that Hunt needed. Nesta would never get the apology that she deserved from this male – but the promise of a future free from him was good enough. A future with Hunt meant more.
His wings scooped low, tucking towards his spine, as Hunt took a backwards step. The cold bite of Nesta’s magic that surrounded the portal edged closer. He hoped he would look cool departing the library and wouldn’t fall on his ass through to the other side.
Once back in Lunathion, Hunt stood at Nesta’s side, proud to do it.
‘We won’t come here again,’ said Nesta, voice growing stronger with every word. Her eyes bounced between her friends and her sisters. ‘I love you but this is best for me. I wish you all the love in the world.’
Nesta lifted the horn to her lips and Hunt prayed to Luna that she’d hit that note on the first try or he’d laugh his ass off again. His hand enclosed around her fist, raising it in the air.
‘This is how we say bye in my world, assholes.’
Hunt prised Nesta’s middle finger up to flip them off – giving her only a moment to blow the Horn before she grinned.
Silver flames swarmed it then fell in on themselves like a star collapsing. They were left with the plain wall of his room in the Comitium.
‘You okay?’
Hunt touched her cheek in an attempt to read her expression. She didn’t need to wear the mask anymore. There would be no hiding her feelings or supressing her hurts. Nesta could be Nesta in Lunathion. And if she didn’t know who that was yet, it was fine. She could discover who she was.
Nesta slipped her hands around his neck, moving closer. ‘Oh, you are going to get it tonight, Orion Athalar.’
‘Oh?’ An eyebrow cocked up.
‘Defending me. Making them say sorry. What a male.’
Their lips crushed together. Now they had about a thousand things to do before they could relax, like storing the Horn somewhere safe, where nobody would notice the magic, find a place to live rather than keep her smuggled in the barracks, and figure out what the Hel was in that massive bag. With Nesta at his side, anything was possible. They’d weather the storm.
‘Your male,’ Hunt said between hurried kisses.
‘Mine,’ agreed Nesta.
‘Always.’
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Keith Howell - Dramatic Epilogue - Summary
I pretty much have no idea what I’m doing. I don’t trust me, and you shouldn’t either. This summary is not guaranteed to be accurate, it’s mostly written for myself to follow along with the route.
Sometime after coming to Jade, Emma notices something unusual in Keith’s room. Keith had left on official business that morning, leaving Emma alone. She thought she would help him out by doing some light housekeeping that morning and watering his plants, and that’s when she finally noticed it.
(Can you spot it?)
Just behind the mirror and tree is an outlined depression in the wall. Knocking lightly on it, Emma thought that it sounded hollow like there was a room behind it. Maybe it was a secret passage, similar to the one Emma and Keith had used to sneak into the castle to confront Fernand and the king?
If so, this was probably a secret only the royal family would know about. Additionally, Keith had been hiding it behind his mirror and tree, giving it a mysterious and secret atmosphere. Emma is curious about it, but maybe it was a cultural thing to not talk about it?
Try as she might, the secret in Keith’s room occupies her mind often.
~~~
Leaning against a large tree in a secret forest bathed in sunlight, Alter!Keith grumbles about being a surprise therapist. He looks directly at him, his gaze blunt and exasperated.
Yes, but this is important, it’s about Emma. She’s been distracted lately, but when he asked around about it, there didn’t seem to be any problems. Maybe there’s a different kind of reason, an internal reason.
Alter!Keith asks him to explain.
Maybe Emma has realized that he’s gloomy, ill-mannered, and is now tired of him. As much as he’s tried to change, his improvements are slow and hard. Maybe, now that they’ve been together for a while, Emma has realized that he’s nothing more than a weed that’s good for nothing but feeding mushrooms.
What will happen if she tries to break up with him?
Oh no, but he can’t let her go no matter what she wants. If she tries to leave him, he’ll just cling to her and cry, and hope that she feels some smidgeon of pity.
Alter!Keith groans, he now feels disgusted after hearing all of that.
Right? He hates this part of himself too, but he’s so desperate. Without Emma, he’s not sure if he can even breathe.
With a flat, deadpan voice, Alter!Keith agrees that breathing is important. Okay, so he’s strangely considerate of everyone around him but can’t seem to comprehend Emma’s emotions. It’s really strange that he can’t comprehend what’s really bothering Emma.
Clouds flow forward, blocking the sun and covering the forest in a cool shade. He’s also easy to understand.
There is a solution. Alter!Keith asks if he’s prepared to show Emma everything.
Yes, he doesn’t want to hide anything from Emma. Why, what is he planning?
Well, he just said that he wants to solve Emma’s dilemma, right?
~~~
One night, Alter!Keith abruptly asks if she wants to know about the secret of his room, helpfully pointing at the half-hidden depression. Emma is surprised at this question, and wonders if she had glanced at it too often and admits that she kinda sorta is curious. At Alter!Keith’s look, she admits that she might be more than just a little curious, maybe even what someone would call ‘very’.
Alter!Keith tells her next time just to come out and ask about it. Emma points out that it’s hidden, so she’s not sure if it’s something he wants to talk about. Alter!Keith assures her that she can ask him anything; if it’s her then he’ll explain anything she wants to know.
Standing up, Alter!Keith heads towards the secret, warning Emma to brace herself. He quickly moves the mirror and tree out of his way, before pressing a hand against his wall. Suddenly Emma realizes that it’s a hidden door, opening with a loud noise.
Courteously, Alter!Keith holds out his hand to Emma and invites her inside. Accepting his hand, Emma steps inside the secret room.
(Ta-da!)
The first thing that hits Emma is the smell of books, and she can see the small area lined with shelves upon shelves of books. It’s a dim room, lit only by the candle Alter!Keith has produced, and the moonlight streams through the skylight above.
It’s like a secret base, small and closet sized. To Emma’s eyes, it looks like a treasure trove of books, with even a small reading desk to sit at. Alter!Keith explains that it’s their study, where they can read and write without being bothered. Emma is impressed, it looks like it is free of distractions, and if one looks up at night, they would be able to see the stars. It’s perfect for Keith. Casually, Emma looks to the side at the bookshelf, hoping to investigate the books.
On the left, the shelves are lined with dossiers on national politics, reports, and even some fictional novels.
The books on the right have no title.
Emma asks Alter!Keith about these books, peering at them intently. Alter!Keith explains that they are the diaries he and Nice!Keith used to communicate until recently. Helpfully, he adds that the oldest ones are on the far right, with the newer ones on the left. He helpfully reaches out and pulls out the oldest of the diaries and presents it to Emma.
Emma asks if he’s certain it’s okay for her to read it, and Alter!Keith assures her it is. This is the other reason that he brought her here, so she can get to know them and their past as quickly as possible.
Accepting the diary, Emma looks over the cover. There are fine scratches in the leather, showing its age and its heavy use. Very carefully, Emma opens the book and gently turns the pages, worried about breaking them.
(What can be more fun than reading the private thoughts of someone else?)
The handwriting suggests two different authors
~~~
Keith (?) 1: Who are you? What have you done without my knowledge?
Keith (?) 1: The way everyone was looking at me was strange, they were saying things about me that I don’t understand.
Keith (?) 2: I can do whatever I want with this body.
Keith (?) 2: It looks like I did your job for you. You should thank me; you were very bad at it.
Keith (?) 2: You don’t remember what happened during my time? Then I’ll write down what happened for you.
Keith (?) 2: It’s only a matter of time before everyone acknowledges you as an excellent prince.
Keith (?) 1: Those achievements are yours, not mine.
Keith (?) 1: Your very existence scares me.
Keith (?) 1: Please, I’m begging you, get out of me. This is not normal!
Keith (?) 2: Where do the people disappear to when they are told to go die?
Keith (?) 2: Your fears and confusion mean nothing to me.
Keith (?) 2: Why does this bother you so much? Isn’t it good? All your problems are taken care of while you close your eyes.
Keith (?) 2: Besides, you yourself also want to disappear. So, you go away and disappear instead.
Keith (?) 1: Yes, you are the better one. You’re completely different from me, the failure prince.
Keith (?) 1: As long as you’re here, I can disappear at any time.
Keith (?) 1: How can I make myself disappear?
Keith (?) 1: What should I do-
~~~
Emma slams the book closed, unable to read anymore. The last few lines were blurry, as if the author was crying while writing them.
In her hands is the journey of two different authors trying to understand and know each other. It took them the length of the room to build their relationship into what it is today. Now, both Keiths have accepted each other as a matter of course. However, it never occurred to Emma how hard and frightening it must have been in the beginning.
It must have taken them time to accept reality, and even afterwards, their hearts must have hurt. It breaks her heart to think of Keith handling this insurmountable problem by himself, without having anyone else to depend on.
How many wounds has Keith suffered to get to the point he is at now? And those wounds could not have all healed yet.
The hand holding the diary trembles as Emma considers the weight of all she has learned.
Alter!Keith notes that as much as Nice!Keith has rejected him, he’s also the first person to try to understand him. OF course, Emma never rejected him, even at the beginning. He’s not normal, but he’s beginning to think that neither is Emma.
Emma tells him that she’ll consider that a compliment.
She returns the diary to the shelf and looks around the room again. At the far end of the room is the reading desk, where a brand-new diary is placed. She asks if they’re still keeping a diary, even though they can now speak with each other.
With a grin, Alter!Keith reaches out and opens the diary. Well, it’s not necessary these days, but Nice!Keith has been using it to write about his uneasy feelings from time to time. He flips to a specific page before handing it to Emma to read.
~~~
Nice!Keith: Emma has been acting weird lately, have I done something?
Nice!Keith: I’ve asked if there’s anything that has been bothering her, but she just says that it’s nothing.
Nice!Keith: I don’t know what to do in this situation. I’m thinking about it too much, and now I feel like mushrooms are growing in my head.
~~~
Oh, so Emma has been making Keith feel so uneasy. Emma laughs at how light the worries of this diary are compared to the first one she had just read.
Alter!Keith complains that he is such an idiot. It’s better to talk about this directly with her, rather than write it in a book that no one will ever see. Emma can’t help but agree.
Alter!Keith continues; Emma should tell him that he doesn’t need to keep a dairy anymore. He has tired, but that guy won’t listen to him. Looking up at Alter!Keith’s expression, Emma can see a soft gentleness to it. She assures Alter!Keith that she will handle it, she’ll keep Nice!Keith so busy that he won’t have enough time to sneak off and brood. Hopefully, he will one day choose to share his problems with Emma instead of just his diary.
She wants to be Keith’s refuge from the world.
As Emma looks at the new diary, Alter!Keith suddenly picks her up, pulling the diary from her hands. For some reason, he places Emma on the reading desk, standing between her legs. Emma asks what brought this on so suddenly and Alter!Keith only complains that he was growing bored.
(It actually isn't that fun watching someone else read the diaries of a mad man)
With a grumpy face, Alter!Keith leans forward and captures Emma’s lips, hard enough that it felt like a bite.
Emma tries to tell Alter!Keith to stop, or at least not do this in a place that’s so important to him and Nice!Keith, but she can’t with Alter!Keith’s mouth blocking hers. She grabs onto Alter!Keith’s broad shoulders, thinking to push him away, but instead finds her skirt flipped up as if in revenge.
When she tries to close her legs, Alter!Keith pulls her lower half closer to him, blocking her. Starting from behind her knees, Alter!Keith’s palms begin to run up her legs.
With a noise, Emma is finally able to wrench her mouth away from Alter!Keith’s. Innocently, he asks if she wants to beg him to do more to her.
No, the opposite, actually. Emma gasps as she tries to calm her breathing. This area is important to both Keiths, and she doesn’t want to sully it with this.
Suddenly Alter!Keith is in a bad mood, and he complains that she’s only thinking about him, isn’t she? He’s the one here in front of her, so she should focus on him instead. Emma points out that he’s the one who started talking about Nice!Keith first.
Alter!Keith grumbles at her to stop and steals another kiss from Emma. His hand moves from her leg to her innermost part, touching and stroking it.
Emma feels her face grow hot and she covers her face the moment the kiss ends. Alter!Keith complains that he’s doing this on purpose, and he doesn’t want her to hide her expression. Emma responds that he’s asking for the impossible.
Really?
The fingers that had been stroking her change and start pressing inside of her, and their movement makes Emma tremble. The hungry pain in her lower abdomen clouds her mind and soon she is unable to form coherent thoughts.
Very gently, Alter!Keith holds her to him with his free arm. Is it just him, or doesn’t everyone want to see all kinds of expressions on the one they love? He kisses her face, time and time again, his hand continuing to move between her legs. Alter!Keith will show Emma this expression of his, so she can see how jealous he is when she thinks of him instead.
Alter!Keith is enjoying this. Emma is frustrated since she feels like she’s being manipulated, but her heart is genuinely happy. No matter how many problems either Keith gives her, her love for them just grows. Just as she has touched the heart of Nice!Keith, she wants to touch the heart of Alter!Keith as well.
Giving in, Emma cups Alter!Keith’s face in her hands. She tells him that she understands, from now on she will watch Alter!Keith so much that he’ll grow to hate it. Don’t get so upset in the future.
When she initiates the next kiss, Alter!Keith kindly accepts it. In a room where anger, fear, confusion, and a painful past were started, she and Keith will repaint it with sweet love.
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Okay.
So, the Alvarez connection isn't quite as strong as previously thought, which might be good or bad depending on the rest of the situation. And 'the old man', whoever he is, seems significant. Maybe I've got this the wrong way around with the Hollow Ground situation - maybe she really is another, previous escapee from the Farm using some of the same genetic material.
But also - huh. Revelation becoming suddenly more interesting when Hollow Ground met her. I suspect that has something to do with Marlene's true identity and real face, and the likenesses between them. Not sure what, though.
And- okay, new hero upcoming. And Captain Blaze is apparently following up on those hints from his scrap with Revelation, that's definitely a good sign. Not sure about the rest of it, though.
It is depressing that all Marlene's efforts have boiled down to 'business as usual', though.
...I am going to go out on a limb and say that Vernon Browne knows a lot more about all of this than he's saying - the name Marlene Hepburn would ring a few warning bells for him if he knew enough to turn up at her funeral and confront her girlfriend then, and if he knows she's a Re-Gene...or possibly something about those records Ortega found that shouldn't exist...then there's got to be something interesting there.
...really not sure about the relevance of this one, but okay, Jake's okay. Though, he too appears to have questions that might be useful in future games.
So, Captain Blaze definitely has some questions. That's a good sign. And he seems determined to keep digging. Also, the Guardians appear to be a heroes-for-hire type outfit, based on that line about the payout, which- might make them unreliable in future. Definitely needs watching, that.
Okaaay, that's...vague. Interesting, but vague. What is she up to? And- wait, she was at the auction? Definitely going to want answers to this one.
Holy shit, that's who Owl married? I mean, they're neither exactly major characters, but still- did not see that coming. And I do wonder what's going on in San Francisco that they've got interested in, and whether it's going to come up in future installments.
Also - okay, they're both working with Argent. That might be a problem if the secret gets out.
Okay. Rahim is also doing his digging, but this concern about his colleagues suddenly 'changing their minds' even when it doesn't make sense, and the attacks he's having - epilepsy or similar, I'm assuming - are...ominous, to say the least.
I do hope I get to make more use of this particular alliance in future - no sense having a public official on-side if you're not going to use him.
...hm. That's ominous. Project Director - but for what Project? Locus is established as a telepath - is this the Farm? And if so-
Well, that 'prize project' is probably Marlene. That's...not going to end well. Shit.
...okay, at least Ortega still has some conflicted feelings about this. Thank you very much for the defence, but I was sort of hoping for a longer epilogue.
This is, however, probably going to be bad for the Rangers as a team. And they weren't doing great before.
Ohhhfuck.
Herald. Daniel, as it turns out. I hadn't thought- But of course it would hit hard, and he's the one person Marlene hasn't had a chance to talk to about this yet. Hasn't had a chance to say that- yes, she regrets it. She resented him then, but she was wrong, she wishes she could take it back - not the museum attack, but how she dealt with him during it.
No idea if she's going to get that chance again, but...I sort of wish I could.
Ohholyfuck.
Wasn't expecting a repeat, but- The love of her life. Damn. And the way she can't even be angry in the face of how terrified Marlene is, and how certain that this is the end. I just- I am so invested in this, you have no idea.
...or?
I was sort of expecting that to be it.
You have no idea what a temptation the 'joining the bad guys' line was, because villain girlfriends is a hell of an idea even if that's probably not what happening, but- Marlene really isn't in any state for it.
Also - holy shit, I did not see this one coming.
EEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!
There's hope for them yet!
Admittedly, Marlene is going to be hunted, and if anyone finds out what Ortega's done here, probably so will she, but-
Still. It's a hell of a nice gesture.
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A Long, Interminable Ramble About The Act Of Continuing To Run These Keeping The Narrator Company Livestreams
Something I've been trying to address within myself and finally puzzle out why I feel the exact way that I do is the question of why I feel so foolish for doing these streams, despite enjoying it, and despite being told multiple times by more than one person that they find the act of me doing this inspiring.
I think I might have finally managed to pinpoint the cause and put it into words. I typed all of this up in chat not too long ago, but I wanted to put it out in a slightly more permanent form that won't get so easily lost in the shuffle of the chat.
If it wasn't painfully obvious by now, I deeply admire TSP, but I'm also terrified of it. It sparks the imagination in me like no other and yet I also view it as a deeply cynical, deeply depressing game, and I always feel like I'm just waiting for that cynical shoe to drop and rob me of this joyful spark that's inspired me to create all of these amateur works of mine.
To me, Ultra Deluxe feels like a far more subtle and insidious escalation of the player VS dev violence of the OG game. You are forced to put the narrator through something far worse than the zending and real person ending combined. Something that I consider to be easily the most profound act of cruelty a game has ever forced me to commit, to the point that the only answer I could come up with to the moral dilemma it may or may not pose is to sit in the skip button room forever, refusing to press it even though the game wasn't programmed to acknowledge that choice.
There is inevitably a lot of embarrassment within myself for doing this, because at the end of the day literally all I'm doing is running down the lifespan of my PS4 for no in-game benefit. I've become less insecure about the act of doing this, but that lingering feeling of foolishness is inevitable. Still, I came to realize something over the course of doing this. I could watch a million movies or read a million books about a character meeting a fate worse than death, but only through the interactive medium of video games could someone like me go 'oh, hell naw!' to being forced to put a character through a fate worse than death and decide that I'd rather try to live that experience out with him, even if the outcome cannot be changed. No book or movie could allow me to turn that into a communal activity like the act of streaming this has become.
To continue with my point about player VS dev violence, what follows after is the bucket, and while I personally find the wacky antics of the bucket endings fun and fulfilling in their own right, especially in what they may or may not imply about the narrator as a character, they are seemingly meant to feel like an unfulfilling FU to those who wanted more OG TSP out of UD and thus the discontent from a lot of people who played it.
This all accumulates in the epilogue. While the figurine ending at least seems to give a nice end point to the narrator as a character and for the player to call it quits, the epilogue throws something entirely different in your face and comes off as a final sort of FU as seemingly an end point to the player VS dev violence where you both have ripped yourself to pieces until literally nothing is left. It seemingly ends on a point where the devs have reached total creative destruction and the player themselves is left with nothing but to keep making more soulless content in their place. Thus why it all feels so hopeless and cynical.
And that's probably why I feel so deeply insecure about engaging with this game on this level. I feel as if I've willfully allowed myself to become the butt of some secret joke, and despite the fun and creative joy I get out of it, it feels as if it is only a matter of time before the cynical shoe drops because there was never any hope. I only project hope onto this game.
Depending on how the person viewing the stream themselves view TSP, they can see it as an act of hope and defiance, or they see all of the stuff TSP says about getting too caught up in it and that the best action is to not play it at all and they see someone making an absolute fool of themselves and 'fail' at playing TSP in a profoundly embarrassing long-form content sort of way. Can ya tell why that might make me feel a bit insecure and embarrassed?
Knowing that there are no objective answers to TSP, only questions, mystery, and nonsense, I have been working on trying to let 'MY' truth stand without letting anyone else and their interpretations dictate my own or destroy it, but that can be hard by the mere nature of what I'm doing.
Ironically, you can kind of see the evolution of my thought process about the player/dev relationship through my work, or more like the audience/storyteller relationship. For the longest time I though that the ultimate goal should be for Stanley and the narrator to find freedom away from each other because they seem so inherently toxic to each other, with there maybe being the hope that they can come together again someday in a more healthy way. That was what my first two TSP fics dealt with.
These days I see them more as two halves of the same whole, and for them to try and get away from each other is to deny a fundamental part of themselves. They fall apart not because their butting heads rips each other apart, but because they view it as an act of trying to escape the other, which only leads to a creatively dead land of utter isolation. I see their push and pull not as inherently toxic, but the creative process of being inspired by one another. Thus my newest TSP fic, On The Nature Of Infinity.
And ironically, despite my views shifting over time, that does not necessarily make the two Fate Of The Narrator fics of mine no longer 'canonical' to my current view of TSP. The whole point of those two stories was a reparation of the relationship between audience and author by the author functionally becoming the protagonist of the story for a little while. It ended with the narrator heading off to find Stanley again so that they hopefully can come together again in a far more kinder manner.
And what is the act of these streams if not exactly that? A willingness to be playful with this game in a completely unexpected way the devs didn't even account for. Being inspired and hopefully generating more creative inspiration through the act of doing something so absurd. The problem is, as always, I don't know the true authorial intent behind any of this, and the game is so deeply cynical at its core that where I view it as creatively butting heads with this game and what it presents, I can also see the devs silently watching all of this from the shadows and having a good laugh at this idiot. Thus that feeling like the shoe could drop at any moment, and in that very TSP way, instead of it being a creative butting of heads, it is in actuality still a destruction of creativity where something will happen and all of this creative energy of mine is destroyed just as violently as the epilogue seems to imply that is the case for the devs.
Thus why I keep saying I cannot imagine the game having any response to any of this but a mocking one. Regardless, I'm glad for the non-TSP related inspiration and encouragement these streams have generated. It means the time I've shaved off of my PS4's lifespan has not been in vain lol.
I guess it is a very narrator-like thing to be paralyzed by the choices you can make, but unlike him, I made the choice to do this thing despite the conflicting feelings it causes for me in not knowing if I'm doing something of value or just making myself look like an idiot.
And I should note that I do not view running these streams as a burden. I would not be doing this at all if I did not enjoy doing it. The act of doing this keeps me in a creative headspace. Thus you get things like the skip button room cat cam lmao.
And since the topic occasionally comes up, I really don't want anyone bothering the devs about these streams. It sounds like they want to move on from TSP and these streams could very easily come off as a subtle badgering of them to keep making more new TSP. Would I love for them to go back and add something for waiting in the skip button room? Of course. But I also respect their artistic intent and the fact that I don't know the actual thought process that went into any of this. I mean no disrespect in doing this nor am I trying to bulldoze over the actual artistic intent of this thing with my own.
Thus, I really don't want anyone badgering them to take note of this stream or change the skip button ending merely because I'm doing this stream. These are the people that have literal real world callout posts in their game in the form of stuff like the Raphael trailer and motherfucking Cookie9, so I would very much enjoy it if I did not to end up in that pantheon because the act of doing these streams caused people to annoy them so much they, I dunno, drop a patch personally calling me an idiot or something lol. I'm a literal nobody and I'd like to stay that way than end up acknowledged in such a way that feeds into the deep cynicism that runs through the game.
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Review: Vicious
Synopsis:
Vicious is the explosive conclusion to Sara Shepard's #1 New York Times bestselling Pretty Little Liars series, perfect for fans of the hit ABC Family original TV show based on the series.
High school seniors Aria, Emily, Hanna, and Spencer have been through a lot since their best friend, Alison DiLaurentis, disappeared five summers ago. A stalker named "A" has harassed them for their past mistakes and revealed their darkest secrets to the world. They've been on TV, hounded by the press, kicked out of school, arrested, and even put in jail. With time running out, and their lives on the line, one of the Liars does something so terrifying and shocking, fans will be left breathless.
Sara Shepard's fan base continues to grow as ABC Family's hit Pretty Little Liars TV show draws in new readers to the #1 New York Times bestselling series. Full of unexpected twists and shocking revelations, this long-awaited finale to this much-loved series will not disappoint.
Plot:
They were on trial for killing Ali. Of all the things Ali has done for them, framing them for her murder, and facing life in prison, is probably at the top of the list. With the public siding with the Ali Cats, the Liars have heavy hearts, especially Emily. After losing Jordan, and Ali almost drowning her, Emily's freak out is seen as critical evidence. This leads Emily to a depression as she begins to see no value in her life, especially if it ends her in prison. Aria is also losing hope, and like the fleeting artist that she is, takes more drastic measures to avoid prison time. Luckily for Aria, Noel is back in her life and unwilling to let the girl he loves go to prison for a murder he's pretty sure she did not do. Speaking of love, Hanna and Mike are still madly in love. They are so madly in love, they are willing to stay forever with each other before Hanna is carted away for life. The only Liar who is not losing their head is Spencer. Taking the practical "101 ways to survive prison" route when an old flame makes her realize that life on the outside is better than surviving prison. When a traumatic event puts our liars at odds with each other, they find themselves separated and at the mercy of Ali. Only in this case, Ali is their Judge. With an end in sight, the Liars must fight for their lives to beat Ali for the last time or suffer a lifetime in prison for a crime they swear they did not commit.
Thoughts:
I love this series, and I am so happy that Sara Shepard let it finish with a bang. Unlike previous stories, this book had several events throughout the novel, allowing more twists and turns than the previous novels. We got to witness the Liars before the trial, during it, after the verdict was heard, and then have the shocking conclusion I did see coming. Still, it was worth it all the same. With easy writing, I hated how Shepard separated the girls for most of this story. What happened made sense; it just sucked that for the last novel our Liars spent it apart rather than being together. Our Liars went back to not being friends as they spent previously in the series, and not as besties for life, as Shepard had them be within the last few installments in the series. I was ready for an entire book about lifelong friends sticking together in their worst movement of their life, instead of Liars barely speaking as their own trial for murder. Despite the Liars hating each other, the pacing of this novel was genius. It made you appreciate every small interaction the girls had. After fifteen other books, this is the last time we will read about Hanna talking to Mike or Spencer making up with Melissa. Call me nostalgic, but I appreciated how many characters Shepard brought back to make their final experience after such a long series. This is why for best and worst, I honestly loved each of the liar's plot lines in this novel, as at this point, it is just so "them" that for their character, it all makes sense. With an epilogue of six months later, the series is over. It had some rough parts in the middle. I generally enjoyed this story for what it represents in the series and how Shepard has given the liars the perfect ending they deserve.
Also just way better than the show, screw season 7!
Body Count
As Shepard keeps killing people off, I think it would be a good idea to keep track of who died, but without spoiling the ending of the current book, as her habit is killing them off with two chapters to go. So here is the list of the dead for the previous book #15:
Jenna, Ian, Mona, Toby, Courtney, Tabitha, Gayle, Graham, Kyla, Jordan, Macie, Robin and Ali (?)
Read more reviews: Goodreads
Buy the book: Amazon
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Tag, You’re It- Massimo x Reader (Part Eight)
Pairing: Massimo Torricelli x Reader
Warning(s): language, angst, violence, mentions of miscarriage, kidnapping, depression.
Summary: Finally, everything is revealed. The reader’s past, as well as the truth about your parentage and your secret is finally unveiled during a fatal and long overdue sit down with your father.
A/N: This is a very important chapter so I hope you enjoy! Only a few more chapters before this series is finished!
Part One Part Two Part Three Part Four Part Five Part Six Part Seven Part Nine Part Ten Epilogue
You didn’t keep track of time in the days that you had spent locked away in your room. You avoided mirrors entirely, having no desire to look at the dark circles that embedded themselves under your eyes or the way your eyes had lost any sort of light in them. Your lips were chapped, but the headaches had ceased a day or two ago. You were sure that you had cried yourself out the day Massimo had sent you away, that there were no longer any tears that your weak body could muster. A part of you felt incredibly selfish, given your condition, but you couldn’t think clearly. Every waking moment was spent thinking about Massimo. You weren’t eating nearly enough nor drinking enough water to fuel your body. Sleep evaded you, though you didn’t desire that either. All you really could think about was how you would never see the man you loved again.
‘’Honey?’’ your father’s throaty voice called from behind you as you sat against the large window of your room.
Guards were stationed everywhere, at least two of them always present at your door. In short, running away or even jumping out your balcony simply weren’t options. Your hand twitched at the sound of your father’s footsteps, sucking in a deep breath when his meaty hand gently clasped your shoulder.
‘’Honey, the maids have been telling me that you haven’t been eating much,’’ the way his voice gave the illusion of genuine concern baffled you. The way this man, this monster, who kidnapped and sold thousands if not millions of women and children could go to sleep every night and be free of guilt stunned you. How easily he could attempt to continue this charade of being the loving, doting father that you had foolishly believed all of these years filled your insides with revulsion.
‘’I. . .I’m not hungry,’’ you croaked, your throat dry as a tendril of your hair (which that itself seemed to lose its’ shine) fell in front of your face.
Your father reached out to brush it away, stopping short when he noticed the way you cowered and flinched. He let out a sigh of frustration, turning his attention to the door.
‘’Leave my daughter and I alone, we have much to discuss,’’ he barked at the guards, who dutifully did as their boss ordered and went on their merry ways.
A lavishly hand carved wooden chair scraped along the tiled floors as your father took his seat a few feet in front of you. He leaned forward, creasing his expensive suit and the way his gold Rolex glistened caught your attention for a brief moment.
‘’Y/n, what happened to you?’’
You barked out a laugh, shaking your head as your hand ran itself through your locks. ‘’You cannot be serious,’’ you chuckled, your father’s bushy brows pinching together in both confusion and dwindling patience.
‘’As the plague,’’ his tone took on a more serious bite, causing your faux grin to melt away and be replaced with cold, angry eyes. Those terrible eyes. You couldn’t help but think those terrible eyes had been the last thing many people had looked into before they died.
‘’My entire life has been a lie. Everything I thought you stood for, father, has been a lie,’’ you shifted your weight to look him dead in the eye. His thumbs nervously twitched.
‘’You had a great childhood,’’ he tried deflecting. ‘’You never wanted for anything.’’
‘’At what cost, father?! Human lives?? Innocent people everyday suffer because of you, because of this family! Families torn apart, lives ruined. And you didn’t even care!’’ you snarled, arms waving around wildly.
‘’I did what I had to in order to ensure we were on top! It’s time you grew up and knew what reality consists of, young lady! It is survival of the fittest, eat or be eaten, kill or be killed!’’ he spat, hands doing all sorts of manic gestures. You scoffed, shaking your head.
‘’I have been kidnapped, used as leverage, nearly assaulted in an alleyway, beaten and nearly shot by YOUR men. Don’t you dare sit there and attempt to lecture me about reality or the real world. I’ve SEEN the real world, and it is an ugly, decrepit, dark place because of men like you,’’ you hissed. For a split second you swore you saw your father cower back from your words. At the very least he was unnerved by your changed personality. You were no longer the innocent child calling him excitedly about your acceptance letter to Harvard, nor the sweet little girl picking apples in the orchard. You’ve changed into something else entirely.
‘’And you think Massimo Torricelli is any different?’’ his voice terrifyingly composed and stoic.
You were at a loss for words as you sat back into your chair. You gazed at the bronze door handle just yards away. ‘’I know he’s different.’’
Your father laughed, shaking his head at you in the same manner he would when you were young and had said something out of childhood innocence. It made your blood boil.
‘’Now I am convinced you truly live in a fantasy, y/n,’’ he chuckled, taunting you. Baiting you.
You leaned forward in your chair, forearms resting on your knees as you met his cold gaze.
‘’So set me straight.’’
He arched a brow, any implication of humor immediately evaporated from his face. ‘’About?’’
‘’Everything. Laura, Mario, my mother, everyone and everything. Set me straight. Release me,’’ you demanded without blinking. He gulped at the mention of your mother, rubbing his hands on his pants and looking down at the family ring.
‘’No, look at me. I want you to look at me as I finally hear the truth in your own words,’’ you ordered. He clenched his jaw, but did as you wished. Your gaze softened only slightly as you increasingly grew desperate.
‘’I need you to release me.’’
He sighed, glancing once more at the ground before meeting your gaze.
‘’Twenty-seven years ago. . .your mother and I had been married for nearly ten years. Seven. . .seven miscarriages and one stillbirth later and we still had no children. You know as well as I do that in this life, a family needs a legacy. Children are that legacy. Without them, the family dies out and leaves its’ head vulnerable.’’
‘’We had visited numerous doctors from all over the world. The words ‘sterile’, ‘hostile womb’, ‘low chance of conception’ quickly became accustomed to us. It took a heavy toll on her. She lost weight, her smile, even some hair and above all she lost the will to live. And the family became weaker because of my inability to produce an heir to the y/l/n throne. At this point I had been in the business for quite some time. I had done everything my father and grandfather failed to do; create an empire. I succeeded in establishing my throne, but I had failed miserably at producing an heir. One day, as I was overseeing normal operations, I saw something.
This woman, a spitting image of your own mother in her youth screamed wildly. Had her health not deteriorated from the depression and numerous treatments, I could’ve sworn it was my loving wife, but no this woman was fiercer, younger. The wails that erupted from her mouth were inhuman, like a fox caught in a trap or a mother wolf crying to the moon. She caused a great disturbance that day, work seemingly ceased as I made my way over to see what the commotion was about. I gripped her arm and saw she was carrying a small bundle tucked under her breast. The men and I finally ripped it from her and there you were. . .this small, beautiful child. Truly beautiful. Too beautiful to be in the hands of clients and sold off like livestock. It made sense why this woman fought tooth and nail to keep you two together; refusing to be separated and sold off. She kept screaming for her husband, and she kept wailing your name over and over as I took you. She was sent away. . .somewhere far down South. . .Australia or New Zealand rather. And from then on you were our little y/n.’’
You froze in your chair, mouth dry as the ground beneath your feet crumbled right from under you. One could hear a pen drop at the silence that plagued the room.
‘’W-what was my name?’’ was all you could think to ask. Somewhere, somehow in the deepest part of you, you knew. The name was on the tip of your tongue, yet you prayed that you were wrong. But you knew. You knew. He pondered a second or two, searching the archives of his mind before he finally answered:
‘’Alessia.’’
Your father rushed to your side as you collapsed onto your knees, sobbing and wheezing for air. ‘’Y/n! Y/N breathe!’’ he yelled, holding you to his chest as you let out a blood curdling scream, echoing off the walls and throughout the mansion. With everything in you, you screamed. You clawed, kicked, pounded your fists on any surface within your proximity. Begged. Begged to make it stop. Begged for him to tell you that he lied. That it wasn’t true. That he hadn’t ripped you from your birth mother’s arms and ripped away your identity. That you were y/n y/l/n, daughter of y/f/n and y/m/n. But he never did. He never would. And you were forced to face the dark, haunting reality of your tragic past.
Your name was not your name. Your home was not your home. Your mother had not been your mother. And your father was not your father. It had been Mario all along. So close, yet now forever out of reach. How cruel it had been.
Hours must have passed. You weren’t sure how you ended up back in your bed with a towel draped over your forehead, forcibly given water and orange juice. After the maids had assured your father that you had only suffered a panic attack had he dismissed everyone. In their urgency, the maids completely abandoned their cleaning supplies by the door to your father’s annoyance but said nothing and had taken a seat at the foot of your bed.
‘’I am so sorry. Truly y/n,’’ was all he could say, avoiding your eyes.
‘’Don’t. Don’t call me that,’’ you shook your head, tears brimming your eyes.
He huffed, shaking his own head in annoyance. ‘’You have cost me enough trouble as is. Over 80% of my produce is gone. Most of my men, dead! I have to rebuild this family from the ground up. All for your fucking fairytale romance, all because you spread your legs for that fucking bastard!’’ he snarled, finally showing his true colors.
A slight smirk threated to tug at your lips as you saw him begin to unravel, but opted to meet his deadly glare with your own as you sat up. He must’ve noticed this because he took a deep exhale and collected himself, slowly deteriorating into the role of the caring father.
‘’That said, you are ready to begin overlooking things as well. You are still my daughter, still the one to inherit this business. You will work to rebuild, restore, and expand this family’s name. And in time this will all be forgotten,’’ he rose, turning to exit.
‘’You’re wrong.’’
He visibly froze, fists clenching at his sides. He swiftly turned back around to face you.
‘’Y/n,’’ he hissed through a locked jaw.
‘’I told you, that’s not my name. It never was. And I am not going to help you rebuild this fucking family, I’m going to use the foundation of this house brick by brick and stone by stone to build my own funeral pyre if I have to. But I am done. I am done being afraid and scared and lied to. I’m done being a pawn.’’
‘’What makes you so sure you can walk away from this? You think he’s going to save you? That he’s just going to waltz right in here and take you back and you’ll live happily ever after?’’ he scoffed, face turning purple from his rage. You shook your head in disagreement.
‘’I’m saving us,’’ a protective hand placed over your stomach. It took him a moment before it finally sunk in. All the dots became aligned and, for once, it was he who was finally brought to the light of realization. You nodded.
‘’You said it yourself; children are that legacy. Your legacy will die with you while his will live on.’’
‘’You’re. . .’’
‘’Pregnant.’’
The air went frighteningly cold. He reached into his back pocket and you broke out into a cold sweat. The thudding of your heart beating in your chest was the only noise that seemed to matter. Now or never. He steadily rose his hand, pistol in plain sight and glinting from the evening sun shining through the sheer curtains. Now or never. The slender glass cup that you had drank from rested in your iron grip. Now or never. The abandoned cleaning supplies just feet away from the man holding a gun and aiming at your stomach. Now or never. The sound of his index finger clicking the safety off echoed in your ears as the world seemed to move in slow motion.
‘’If you think this story has a happy ending then you, my dear, haven’t been paying attention.’’
Now or never.
Tag list: @yolobloggers @mysticallandmaker @alicedopey @it-was-all-a-beautiful-dream @anushkagoswami2692 @autumnsoidier @calirindo @allhalemccallthings @truly-insatiable @tinystudentfirepurse @allaboardthekahnetrain @romewritingshop @buckyownsmylife @lilmissemmaa @loula-coola @severewobblerlightdragon @smyfmj @tumble4u @tantalizingcara @lynne1993 @irinabatsy @madilopez19 @waitingtobeimpressed @justabeautiful-letdown
@thefuckingluxury @newprincessbrat @onelovesr @jgtfvhsg @jadert15 @bethylliveson @originalssire @drriiia @mercip0urleveniin @choclytegurl @putribankah @daddyslittlebabyhasarrived @eyesonly2019 @tumble4u @imagines-bakeryforoldermen @hxjabae
#massimo torricelli#mafia romance#365 days#michele morrone#Mafia Wars#365 days fic#massimo torricelli x reader#massimo torricelli x you#love
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The Long Game by Rachel Reid
Summary: For ten years, hockey superstars Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov have been keeping their relationship a secret. And with the way their careers are going, it will be ten more years before they retire and may be able to finally be a couple out in the open. But Ilya doesn't want to wait that long. He loves Shane more than he could ever put into words and sometimes he's afraid that Shane doesn't feel the same way. As the pressures of their careers and the unspoken words between them cause Shane and Ilya to begin to spiral in different ways, they must decide if they're truly in it for the long haul.
Thoughts: This book was an emotional roller coaster. I laughed, I cried, I smiled so hard my cheeks hurt. It truly was a joy to read and a very emotionally satisfying ending to Shane and Ilya's story. I think it's a pretty popular consensus that 'Heated Rivalry' was the best book in Rachel Reid's Game Changers series and Shane and Ilya were most definitely my favorite couple, so I was both excited and terrified to see how their story would end and I'm so glad to say that this book was everything I could have hoped for.
Where 'Heated Rivalry' was slightly more focused on Shane's emotional journey as he came to terms with his sexuality, Ilya Rozanov is the star of 'The Long Game'. It's his emotional highs and lows that pull you through the story and keep you wanting to know more. He's secure in his feelings for Shane and he knows what he wants their future to be, but he does have his own baggage to deal with and this book allows him the space to face up to his childhood trauma, settle into himself, and figure out what truly makes him happy. This book hit particularly close to home for me as it broached the topic of Ilya being depressed and whether he knew who he was outside of hockey and Shane. He goes to therapy, which I love to read about because it is something that shouldn't be stigmatized and Ilya seeking out professional help is handled thoughtfully.
I know it sounds like this book is emotionally heavy, and it is, but I am delighted to report that the sarcastic banter and electric sexual tension between Shane and Ilya is still present. I always love reading books about couples that are already established because as much fun as it is to read about two people falling in love, getting to see past the initial honeymoon phase and get a peek into how they just live their normal lives as a couple is always fascinating. Shane and Ilya have a routine and its very obvious that they love each other hard, but they are still working on their communication and figuring out how to say what they really feel. Their insecurities are relatable and I kind of love the fact that even though they've been in a committed relationship for three years when this book begins, they're not perfect and they still have arguments and miscommunications, but they're dedicated to each other and no matter what, they just want to be together.
The main conflict of the book revolves around the fact that Ilya wants to take their relationship public but Shane is much more hesitant. There's more nuance to it than that and there's more buildup to the blowout they have about the topic, but I do appreciate that the Big Fight in this book happens around halfway through. Because they're already a couple, the book doesn't really follow the normal romance novel story structure, so after they fight, they make up and there's still a good quarter of the book left to go. I will say that I'm not completely on board with how their relationship is eventually made public but I am glad we do get to see a significant amounts of the after affects, and how their teammates and friends and the general public react.
If I had one wish for this book it would be that I would have liked to see a longer epilogue. I love the circumstances Shane and Ilya are in at the end of the book and would have been fun and heartwarming to get to live in that moment for just a little bit longer. All in all, this book is fantastic and I couldn't be happier with the conclusion of this amazing series and relationship.
#mm#book rec#book recommendation#the long game#rachel reid#game changers series#interracial#hockey#established relationship
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Need help looking for a Drarry Fanfiction
Hello people,
Well I am in dire need of help in finding few Draco/Harry fanfictions and believe me I have spend last few weeks going through thousands of stories in Ao3... my neck and eyes hurt from all of it now. So I am hoping that some good soul would have mercy on poor overworked me. Honestly its ridiculous when you can't find the story when you want it and you can't remember the name or author or helpful tags but other times its always keeps popping up. Anyways enough rambling now, I am looking for two Draco/Harry stories which were published in Archive of Our Own (Ao3).. the things that I remember about the storyline are:
01. The first one is a multi-chapter long Draco/Harry post-war story in which its few years after the war and Draco is assumed dead. Harry and Draco were in-relationship secretly before war, Draco was hiding in Order safe-house but when the fight was over Harry went to the safe house to find Draco missing. On the other hand Draco is in America working in an Café living as muggle, he has lost his memory and his present name is Drake. Someone sees Draco in Café and Harry goes to find him... one co-worker of Draco liked him but nothing happened. In the end it is found that Hermione had loved Harry and she was the one who obliviated Draco, dropped him in America hoping that if Harry assumes Draco dead than she'll be able to make him fall in love with her. Hermione even married Ron to remain close to Harry, in the end Draco didn't completely recover his past memories but he had them from sort of third person POV due some sort of Seer ability of Malfoy line. In the Epilogue Hermione come to ask forgiveness on a Christmas morning and Draco does... Harry talks to her and she leaves without meeting anyone else or getting inside the house. Harry and Draco visit the Café where Draco worked as Drake, they give them lot of money and that co-worker who had crush on Draco is now interested in other new co-worker named Gabriel.
02. The second story I am looking for is a One-Shot in which Harry finds Draco crying in a bathroom and they are still in Hogwarts. Draco feels that he is girl born as a boy and no one understands it, Severus had thrown Draco's hairclips and ribbons about which he was crying for. Harry help Draco though it, they become friends then secret relationship and then when puberty hits and Draco is so depressed, injuring himself badly. Harry saves him and then asks Hermione for help, they brew potion to help Draco change into girl permanently in secret in Room of Requirement. In the end during holiday Harry comes to Malfoy Manor breaking a glamour on Draco, Lucius feels sad that he had failed to see his child in pain for so long... he decides to be a better father.
Please please if anyone knows the story names or author names, please do tell. I've been searching for so long and still but I haven't found it... so it is my humble request, please help. Thank you in advance, I really hope someone could help me... until than take care.
With love,
Kavya
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Here from ur tsh fic (amazing as always) to demand to know how Judy prooveys doing!!!! Hope the police never find out about her immense amount of tax evasion
judy is always thirty flirty and thriving in spirit if not in age, thank you so much for asking.
judy trivia from the epilogues:
would never get got for tax evasion thanks to her clichéd seedy LA lawyers, but even if she did have to weather some kind of scandal she would do so à la brooke in legally blonde and emerge on the other side with a lucrative book deal to capitalise on the drama.
she keeps in touch with some of her hampden friends altho a lot of them are east coasters- whenever there’s some kind of reunion she loves showing up to show off. does not care if people look down on her tv show fame. does care if people bring up her rival shows and that bitch melinda (who is totally a scientologist). mostly hangs w a variety of LA people that she’s actually friends with despite a wide range of frenemies she sees regularly.
manages to steer clear of every weird 90s hollywood cult despite her trend-following because she doesn’t like bossy people and she finds the initiation schtick boring. is very blasé about this.
on a similar note has religiously followed every trendy diet there is but also kind of ignores the parts she finds unacceptable like not drinking or giving up chocolate. way ahead of the smoothie craze.
has a string of random exes across the years which range from guys obsessed with her that she dumped to guys she was really into who dumped her. currently in her “living for myself” era (again). seeing richard again had her thinking about it but weirdly after whatever went down there she’s had a sort of zen epiphany that maybe she’s okay with entering her thirties an unmarried girlboss. your longtime crush helping his depressed homosexual friend leave his bride at the altar and then mysteriously moving in with him in a different country months later is apparently a real eye-opener to the different paths people can lead in life.
i think judy certainly has the potential to be bi but it’s also very appealing to me if she’s very straight by contrast to richard’s flagrant repression. so “has gay friends” in la but they’re mostly #gay best friends who hang around her for clout and whatnot ergo richard’s deal is very exciting / intriguing to her. when they do manage to meet in toronto for her book signing she’s extremely open about this. richard is mortified. francis refuses to attend on principle not knowing this will one day lead judy to come to montreal instead just to see the two of them as a surprise. on a sidenote goes from passively pro lgbt to staunch lgbt defender who makes this her cause du jour. think invasive/tactless but aggressively supportive. she has drag queens on her show. she does fundraisers. it’s a great career move for her.
despite the tactlessness and insider knowledge does not say a word about richard x francis to anyone. she may be a gossip but she also delights in keeping juicy secrets & beyond that she’s a good friend. anyways no one she knows really knows either of them enough to care. on the other hand will not hesitate to bring up that she knew the dead guys from hampden as soon as richard’s book makes the topic resurface. will make bunny sound like her dead bff, but will not extend this post-mortem closeness to henry winters, who was “very fucking creepy, to tell you the truth”.
considered having a purse dog but thought it’d be too much of a hassle. instead she has a weird pet like a snake or a turtle that she treats like a puppy.
die-hard lady di stan, devastated when she dies. also cannot understand that her gay bestie richard could not care less about this.
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What I Read in September 2021
It's been a stagnant month, but I did find a couple favorites :) as usual, composed of mainly Harry Potter fics but there's a spare Modern Family fic in there and a couple crossovers. I think I read about 27-28 fics :)
Harry Potter
Family Relations by OxfordOctopus
Plot: In which Harry realizes that not even he's exempt from how interconnected magical families are.
Characters: Harry, Pavarti, Hermione, Ron
Relationships: Hermione & Harry & Ron
Warnings: implied/referenced child abuse
Tags: Desi Potter Family; Desi Harry; Hogwarts third year; red-haired Harry Potter
*complete*
Talking to Thestrals by OxfordOctopus
Plot: In a world where Voldemort well and truly died in ‘81, where there are no Horcruxes, where Harry is sequestered off by a man in a flying motorcycle when he's six, and where the only legacy the most feared Dark Lord left behind was his politics and a heavily scarred child, nobody quite realizes that Harry isn’t okay. Nobody but the leathery creatures at the lake, and the girl who looks at them.
Characters: Harry, Luna
Relationships: Harry & Luna
Warnings: anxiety, dissociation, suicidal thoughts, bullying, implied/referenced child abuse, child neglect
Tags: Sirius Black Criticism; Hogwarts second year; Sirius Black Never Went to Azkaban; AU - No Voldemort;
My Notes: Now, I love Sirius just as much as the next girl, but this is such an interesting look at a man raising a kid when he wasn’t ready and the consequences of that (I relate a tad too strongly)
*complete*
Slytherin Politics by OxfordOctopus
Plot: Abused children don't respond well to power plays.
Characters: Harry, Draco, Theodore Nott, Daphne Greengrass
Warnings: graphic depictions of violence
Tags: violence, broken bones, Slytherin Harry, bullying
My Notes: Harry is so truly terrifying in this fic, it’s wonderful
*complete*
rotten on the inside by cassiopeia721
Plot: Harry's boggart isn't Voldemort, or even a dementor. It's something much worse.
Characters: Harry, Snape, Hermione, Ron
Relationships: Hermione & Harry
Warnings: implied/referenced child abuse
Tags: Hogwarts third year; boggarts; angst; protective Hermione; Hermione is a Good Friend
*complete*
Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell by IamShadow21
Plot: Questions asked, questions unasked, secrets told and secrets kept, trust, devotion, empathy and love. Ron and Harry's friendship, from that first day on the Hogwarts Express, right through until after the Battle. Can be read as a friendship fic, or a ship fic. It's open to interpretation.
Characters: Harry, Ron, Fred, George, Hermione, Arthur
Relationships: Harry/Ron
Warnings: implied/referenced child abuse
Tags: canon compliant; canon-typical violence; friendship, hurt/comfort; protective Ron; Protective Fred; Protective George; gen or pre-slash; platonic cuddling; POV Ron
My Notes: now this could be read as pre-slash, as a relationship, or just good friends, but I am so completely head over heels in love with the idea of Harry and Ron! Best friends to lovers!
*complete*
Best Served Cold by enchantedsleeper
Plot: “C’mon, Freddie,” George says suddenly, sotto voce. “Sooner the four of us get out of here, the better.” It hadn’t been the right moment, as they were exploring the Dursleys’ comfortable house in the dead of night, to plant a well-timed trick or a trap and risk blowing the whole operation – and getting Harry into even more trouble with his sadistic relatives. Better just to get Harry out and away from that place. But two years later, Fred and George got their chance for revenge.
Characters: Harry, Fred, George, Ron, Arthur
Relationships: Harry & Ron; Harry & George & Fred
Warnings: implied/referenced child abuse
Tags: Book 4; Harry is an honorary Weasley
*complete*
east, west, home’s best by taizi
Plot: You can never have too many brothers, Ron decides, for the very first time in his life. And there's always room in the Burrow for another Weasley, even if only an honorary one.
Characters: Harry, George, Ron, Fred
Relationships: Harry & Ron
Warnings: implied/referenced child abuse
Tags: Chamber of Secrets; families of choice
*complete*
live for today, hope for tomorrow by Vennat
Plot: Professors are Hogwarts are a little more observant and a little less likely to allow their students to be in harms way. OR A canon rewrite starting from book two, featuring friendship, angst, and a severe lack of oblivious characters.
Characters: Hermione, Harry, Ginny, Ron, Luna, Fred, George, Snape, Draco
Relationships: Hermione & Harry & Ron; Harry & George & Fred; Harry & Ginny; Luna & The Golden Trio; Harry & Snape; Draco & Harry
Warnings: implied/referenced child abuse; PTSD; panic attacks; blood; vomit; injury; food issues; depression
Tags: friendship; Harry has a saving people thing; mentor Snape; BAMF Harry; Smart Harry; canon rewrite; angst; Dumbledore bashing; Book 2; Harry is a Good Friend; Harry is Bad at Feelings
*complete* [part of a series; hasn’t been updated since 2020]
The Closest Distance Between Two People by StartledStarfish
Plot: In Harry's third year, no dementors boarded the Hogwarts Express in search of Sirius Black. Remus Lupin, the new defense professor, slept the whole way there. He did not wake to cast a patronus. Harry never passed out. Never heard his mother scream. Never saw the flash of green light. Never felt the unspeakable cold drain all the happiness out of him. So when Harry’s turn came to face the boggart, his greatest fear could not be a dementor. Harry blinked and looked up into the smiling face of Albus Dumbledore.
Characters: Harry, Ron, Remus, Dumbledore, Vernon, McGonagall
Relationships: Harry & Ron; Harry & Remus
Warnings: implied/referenced child abuse; childhood trauma, child neglect
Tags: boggarts, dementors, Dursley Family Bashing; Dumbledore Bashing; healing; angst with a happy ending; Ron makes sure nobody’s sad for long; friendship; laughter
*complete*
Grey Space by noaacat *favorite*
Plot: In 1991, Harry Potter begins his time at Stonewall High, unaware that he is anything more than a boy prone to freakish accidents. When he turns fourteen, he will receive a letter that will change his life. He will learn he is Harry Potter, and be invited into a world where belonging is his birthright. Until then, he stumbles on, two steps forward and one step back, out of the cupboard and into the life he was never meant to have.
Characters: Harry, The Dursleys, Dumbledore, lots of muggle OCs
Relationships: none
Warnings: implied/referenced child abuse; implied/referenced homophobia; child abuse; child neglect
Tags: AU: Hogwarts Starts Late
My Notes: This one! Is so good! The worldbuilding alone is amazing and the author really did make me immersed in the small sleepy town of Little Whinging. Please, if you read any fic on this list, read this one! It’s so good! Instant favorite!
*complete*
Iron by belleslettres
Plot: Draco also has a penchant for shirts with fiddly collars and cuffs and will not even entertain the notion of going anywhere looking like anything less than perfection. But Harry, who will do almost anything for Draco, refuses to iron them. “My aunt used to make me do all the ironing,” Harry says. “I hated it.”
Characters: Harry, Draco
Relationships: Draco/Harry
Warnings: implied/referenced child abuse
Tags: fluff and angst; post-war; Epilogue what Epilogue; fluff; domestic fluff
*complete*
All That Stands in its Path by thebiwholived
Plot: "An old soul, people might say, and Molly has never quite been sure what such a person would look like, until the day her family meets the Boy Who Lived in a dingy train station on the way to school." Molly Weasley's perspective on the summer Harry Potter comes to stay.
Characters: Harry, Molly, Weasley Family
Relationships: Harry & Molly Weasley
Warnings: implied/referenced child abuse
Tags: canon compliant; book 2
*complete*
To See More Clearly by JellyShark
Plot: Harry didn't make it out of Privet Drive after blowing up Aunt Marge. He is alone, locked away, forgotten. To make things worse, his magic is changing, morphing into something unknown and terrifying. Harry returns to Hogwarts a changed boy, unable to hide the effects of his time with the Dursleys. His Third Year dawns, bringing with it a man who feels like home, a Hufflepuff Prefect, and a dog who reminds Harry of a time when he was loved.
Characters: Harry, Remus, Ron, Snape, Sirius, Hermione, Luna, Cedric, Neville, McGonagall
Relationships: Sirius/Remus; pre Cedric/Harry; Remus & Harry; Hermione & Ron & Harry; Cedric & Harry; Sirius & Harry
Warnings: implied/referenced child abuse
Tags: Harry Needs a Hug; Harry is an Empath; Smart Harry; Magically Powerful Harry; Mentor Remus; flawed but well-meaning Dumbledore; book 3; book 4; Snape gets worse before he gets better; angst; hurt/comfort
*incomplete* [last updated August 2021]
Holidays by diogxnes
Plot: While his housemates discuss the upcoming holidays, Harry cannot help but think of how he never experienced a real Christmas with the Dursleys. Ron notices.
Characters: Harry, Ron, Lavender Brown, Seamus Finnigan
Relationships: Harry & Ron
Warnings: implied/referenced child abuse
Tags: book 1; missing scene; canon compliant; emotional hurt/comfort; hurt/comfort; Ron Weasley is a Good Friend
*complete*
Closing In by silver_fish
Plot: Harry supposes he’ll never know how they learned about the cupboard under the stairs. He also supposes he’ll never know how they managed to make him so afraid of it, all these years later.
Characters: Harry, Hermione, Ron
Warnings: implied/referenced child abuse, claustrophobia, implied/referenced torture, codependency, trauma, panic attacks, PTSD, therapy
Tags: post-war; hurt/comfort; touch-starved; guilt; Harry centric; false memories
My Notes: This one made me emotionally exhausted but it’s written super well
*complete*
Adjustments by Velvet_Riptide
Plot: With the Second Wizarding War over, Sirius is more than excited to put everything behind him and raise Harry as his own. However, he and Remus begin to notice odd and troubling behaviors from Harry. Without answers from the source, Sirius turns to Harry's previous guardians--Molly and Arthur Weasley--and learns Harry is still making adjustments from his time with the Dursley's.
Characters: Harry, Sirius, Remus, Molly, Arthur, Hermione, Ron
Relationships: Sirius/Remus; Hermione/Ron; Remus & Harry; Sirius & Harry
Warnings: implied/referenced child abuse; childhood trauma; PTSD
Tags: hurt/comfort; coparenting; Harry lived in the Burrow for several years with the Weasleys before moving to 12 Grimmauld Place;
*complete*
Two Things by TheDivineComedian
Plot: Harry is only four years old and the Dursleys are already mean.
Characters: Harry, Petunia, Vernon, Dudley, imaginary Lily, imaginary James
Warnings: implied/referenced child abuse
*complete*
How to be happy by TheDivineComedian
Plot: The Patronus charm requires a happy memory. Harry Potter doesn't have many, and the Dementors get Sirius, after all. But the story is far from over.
Characters: Harry, Remus, Sirius, Ron, Hermione
Relationships: Harry & Sirius; Harry & Remus; Remus & Sirius
Warnings: major character death; implied/referenced child abuse
Tags: creepy; heartwarming; dementors; Hogwarts third year
My Notes: this one is a fucking doozy good lord (the tags say heartwarming but w h e r e)
*complete*
Knowledge is a Rose by Magi_Silverwolf
Plot: When Harry discovered that he had a name, he clung to that information and all that it entailed. After learning more information about his past, nothing and everything changed.
Characters: Harry
Warnings: implied/referenced child abuse; physical abuse; verbal abuse; mental abuse
Tags: emotional hurt; identity issues
*complete*
No Love for the Wicked by VigilanteVampire4311
Plot: Harry Potter was the Boy-Who-Lived. The Golden Boy. The Chosen One. But it turns out when you run head first into an unknown magical artifact and end up in a void, none of that matters. Now he's in a different time with familiar strangers who just can't seem to understand the new transfer student, Harrison Miller. With a Defense teacher he can't let his guard down for a second around, the Marauders hounding the 'mysterious' new Slytherin, and his housemates who cannot fathom a muggleborn being among them, Harry has to wonder whether fate hates him or if he is really a trouble-making freak like the Dursleys always said.
Characters: Harry, James, Lily, Sirius, Remus, Regulus, Snape, Tom Riddle, Pomfrey
Relationships: Harry & James; Harry & Lily; Sirius & Harry; Remus & Harry; Regulus & Harry; Harry & Tom Riddle; Pomfrey & Harry
Warnings: graphic depictions of violence; implied/referenced child abuse; possessive behavior; depression; non-consensual touching
Tags: The Veil; Slytherin Harry; Marauders are kinda assholes; Tom Riddle is not Voldemort yet; Severus is so done; alternate universe; angst; hurt/comfort; bullying; time travel; Marauders Era
My Notes: so far with 7 chapters in, we haven’t yet gotten to Harry interacting with anyone from the past but it’s still written really well
*incomplete* [last updated September 2021]
The snake in the daffodils by SpicyReyes *favorite*
Plot: Harry follows Sirius through the Veil of Death, and stumbles out on the other side of the Mirror of Erised, under a strange spell and stranded in an unfamiliar Hogwarts.
Characters: Harry, Remus, Regulus, Harry, Ron, James, Lily, Sirius
Relationships: Regulus/James; Sirius/Remus; Draco/Harry
Warnings: graphic depictions of violence; discussions of suicide; discussions of self-harm; suicidal ideation; implied/referenced child abuse
Tags: universe jumping; Hogwarts fifth year; misunderstandings; miscommunication; basically everyone thinks harry wants to die but he is actually just hella confused
My Notes: so, so good! And if you like this one I recommend The Devil’s White Knight which is really similar in concept
*incomplete* [last updated 2020]
been waiting a lifetime (to be with you) by justprompts
Plot: The next time he woke, Potter was shaking him awake. Just, just not the right one. He had hazel eyes for one, and class. This was not Harry Potter. This was - Well, he had just woken up and who accepts the delightfully altering time-related facts of life right as they wake up?
Characters: Harry, Dumbledore; Peter Pettigrew; Prewett Twins; Marlene McKinnon; Sirius; Remus; Lily; James; Draco; Alice & Frank Longbottom; Regulus; Draco
Relationships: Draco/Harry; James/Lily; Sirius/Remus; Marlene McKinnon/Dorcas Meadows; Alice/Frank Longbottom; Regulus & Sirius; Regulus & Draco
Tags: time travel fix-it; Marauders Era; Horcrux hunting; everyone lives/nobody dies; master of death Harry; light-hearted; POV multiple; Harry doesn’t need to be dark/evil to be master of death; irregular and slow updates; mutual pining
*incomplete* [last updated May 2021]
The Gospel Truth by twentysevensummers
Plot: When Harry arrives at Number Twelve Grimmauld Place with a black eye, he has more trouble than expected keeping the truth from Sirius.
Characters: Harry, Sirius, Remus
Relationships: Sirius & Harry
Warnings: referenced/implied child abuse; child neglect
Tags: book 5; hurt/comfort; angst; Harry needs a hug; good godparent Sirius Black; number 12 grimmauld place
*complete*
o children, lift up your voice by orphan_account
Plot: "i don't know if they could've put a flap in the door of the cupboard, now that i think about it," harry laughs nervously. "dunno if it would've fit onto it. since it's smaller than the bedroom door." hermione and ron's heads both shoot up. "what?" ron asks. "excuse me?" hermione says.
Characters: Harry, Ron, Hermione
Relationships: Hermione & Harry & Ron
Warnings: implied/referenced child abuse
Tags: friendship; slight canon divergence; character study; second war with Voldemort; physical affection; lots of hugs
My Notes: this one is so good and if you can get past the fact that the author doesn’t capitalize anything, you’re good to go (although it was difficult to get past that at first for myself)
*complete*
Muggle Management by LadyWinterlight, NerdyKat
Plot: What happens if Hermione notices signs of abuse in Harry during first year? The Wizarding World may not have laws against it, but the Muggle World certainly does...
Characters: Harry, Hermione, Mrs Granger, Mr. Granger
Warnings: implied/referenced child abuse
Tags: family
*complete*
Harry Potter & Other Fandoms
Masked Men and Where to Find Them by tinyrose65
Fandoms: Harry Potter & Daredevil & MCU
Plot: Harry Potter moved to Hell's Kitchen because she wanted a fresh start: time away from the spotlight, where she could focus on being the best Healer she could be. Trust the unconscious man in her dumpster to go and complicate things.
Characters: Harry, Matt Murdock
Relationships: Harry/Matt; past Harry/Draco
Warnings: past domestic abuse; implied/referenced child abuse
Tags: female!Harry
My Notes: this is the first in a series and the second one is also incomplete but they’re both very good and the second one has Jessica Jones!
*incomplete* [last updated 2016]
Magic and Masks by Akoia
Fandoms: Harry Potter & DC Comics
Plot: Harry Potter is anything but normal, thank you very much, he just didn't hold such nonsense as that. Follow him on his adventures through the Wizarding world and muggle world as he struggles to understand who he is, and fight the destiny that's been chosen for him.
Characters: Harry; Dick Grayson; Jason Todd; Bruce Wayne; Alfred Pennyworth; the Dursleys
Warnings: implied/referenced child abuse; canon typical violence
Tags: fluff and angst
My Notes: this is a series with six parts!
*incomplete* [last updated 2020]
Modern Family
Breaking & Entering: (The Start Of) A Love Story by dollsome
Plot: "Oh my God," Mitchell says, "this is insane." It is, for the record. It is actually ... insane.
Characters: Mitchell, Cameron
Relationships: Mitchell Pritchett/Cameron Tucker
Warnings: none
Tags: none
*completed*
#harry potter#hogwarts#harry james potter#fanfic recs#my posts#fanfiction#fanfiction recommendations#fic recs#the marauders#modern family#the golden trio#drarry#wolfstar#dc comics#batman#daredevil#marvel#mcu#my recs
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Wizards Hearts Recs: Healer!Draco
Wizards Hearts was a four-month-long Drarry reading fest. Players were given a playing deck of 52 tropes, and were asked to find 52 different fics to read and comment on to fill their decks. To prevent the same few fics from being read, fics were restricted to only being used for the game three times before being considered ineligible for further points. The tropes and submissions list can be found here.
Check out the masterlist of fics for this trope below the cut!
📜 The Four Doors by fluxweed
Rated: Explicit
Words: 48845
Tags: Mind Healer Draco Malfoy, Legilimency (Harry Potter), Memory Loss, Memory Magic, Sexual Fantasy, Masturbation, Power Imbalance, Auror Harry Potter, Dubious Consent Due To Identity Issues, Dubious Consent Due To Patient/Healer Dynamic, Mind Fucking (Literally), Not Epilogue Compliant, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE
Summary: It’s been four months since Harry lost his memory. Four months of dead ends and no answers. With time running out until his memories are gone for good, Harry agrees to a course of Legilimency therapy with a renowned specialist: Mind Healer Draco Malfoy.
❤️ Read on AO3
📜 Where The Falcons Fly by MyNameIsThunder
Rated: Mature
Words: 283177
Tags: Healer Draco Malfoy, Seeker Harry Potter, Quidditch, accidental magic, Blood and Injury, Not Epilogue Compliant, It's Not Paranoia If They're Really Out To Get You, Post-Hogwarts, Scars, Secret Relationship, Slow Burn, Whump, POV Third Person Limited, Mutual Pining, Power Couple, Major Character Injury, Minor Character Death, Eventual Fluff
Summary: Where the Falcons fly, there’s blood. Where Draco goes, there usually is too. That’s his job, after all – heal morons and the people who get in their way. He could deal with that, he thinks, if only there wasn’t Harry fucking Potter, Seeker, who gets injured a lot even by the Falcons’ standards and seems to have made a habit of inserting himself in Draco’s private life. Draco just wants to heal people – normal people, that is – and do his research in peace. Well, when does he ever get what he wants?
❤️ Read on AO3
📜 A Better Kind of Love by MalenkayaCherepakha
Rated: Explicit
Words: 25768
Tags: Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Post-Hogwarts, Quidditch Player Harry Potter, Healer Draco Malfoy, St Mungo's Hospital, Hospitals, discussion of injuries, Broken Bones, Injury Recovery, Skele-Gro, Physical Therapy, Nightmares, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, Quidditch, Masturbation, Rimming, Shower Sex, Locker Room Sex, Semi-Public Sex, H/D Erised 2020
Summary: Harry, along with the rest of the Puddlemere United team, is determined that this year will be the year they finally win the Quidditch League Cup. But when a Bludger-induced fall leads to a missed Snitch, broken bones, and an extended stay in St Mungo's, that conviction is put to the test. If Harry wants to have any chance of returning to the pitch this season he has to put all of his faith in his assigned Healer. Which is no easy task when that Healer is Draco Malfoy.
❤️ Read on AO3
📜 Meet Cute by rewmariewrites
Rated: Teen and Up
Words: 4203
Tags: Fluff, Mild Hurt/Comfort, St Mungo's Hospital, Hospitals, Healer Draco Malfoy, Auror Harry Potter, POV Draco Malfoy, Pining Draco Malfoy, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Harry is a Little Shit, Banter
Summary: It may be important to note that Draco Malfoy meets the love of his life when he is twenty-five years old.
Well. In the spirit of fairness, that statement is both technically inaccurate and incredibly vague. Draco isn’t just twenty-five years old, when he meets the love of his life, he’s also in his fourth year of the Healing Programme at St. Mungo’s, and this isn't actually the first time they've ever met.
❤️ Read on AO3
📜 Don't Waste Your Eyes on Jealous Guys by EvAEleanor
Rated: Mature
Words: 9667
Tags: MACUSA | Magical Congress of the United States of America, Auror Harry Potter, Healer Draco Malfoy, Roadtrips, Music, Implied Sexual Content, on the bonnet of a car, Pining, jealous boyfriend, mentions of Abusive Relationship (emotionally and verbally), First Kiss, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Hopeful Ending, Choose Your Own Ending, Touch, hearing, TasteofSmut 2020, First Time, Bittersweet Ending
Summary: For two years now, Harry’s life has been different. Not only does he work in New York City as the Auror liaison to MACUSA on an international murder case, but he’s seen more of Draco Malfoy than he’d ever thought possible. Working with him, and spending time with him after work. During all of this time, Harry has watched Draco going back to his shitty boyfriend over and over again. The worst thing about all of this, he’d fallen in love with him. Maybe there’s hope for Harry though. Maybe for just one night...
❤️ Read on AO3
📜 All is NOT well... by iStiz
Rated: Mature
Words: 65500
Tags: HP: EWE, Not Epilogue Compliant, Slow Build, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Hermione Granger & Harry Potter Friendship, Healer Draco Malfoy, Quidditch, Angst, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Physical Abuse, Past Child Abuse, Depression, Substance Abuse, Rehabilitation, Cuddling & Snuggling, Mild Sexual Content, vague sexual content, Happy Ending
Summary: The war may be over but all is NOT well. Harry feels lost, the Ministry is still trying to control him, his friendships with Ron is rocky at best, he doesn't sleep enough, and then there's Draco Malfoy. Things haven't turned out quite the way Harry expected them to, but at least he still has Hermione to help him (and maybe some new friends if he can trust letting them into his life).
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📜 Harry Potter and the elusive day off by pleasebekidding
Rated: Explicit
Words: 71753
Tags: Sleep disorders, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, in all honesty this has a bunch of pain, problematic therapist/patient stuff, mind healer!draco, auror!Harry, no seriously the therapist/patient stuff is super problematic but welcome to fanfic, Child Abuse
Summary: Auror Potter needs a fucking break. He is wiped. He is exhausted. He probably didn't intend to put himself into a magical coma but these things happen. And who cares, really? He is comfortable in a house where he has hidden away all the shit he can't deal with.
Guaritore Christopher Black is an exceptional psychiatrist with a specialisation in sleep disorders. He is also Draco Malfoy in a Glamour.
Minister Hermione Granger knows the dangers and the complications, but she needs her best friend back.
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📜 oxygen by MaesterChill
Rated: Teen and Up
Words: 4065
Tags: Healer Draco Malfoy, Auror Harry Potter, Post-Hogwarts, Smoking, Cigarettes, Talking, Breathing, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Minor Character Death, A Kiss, Fanart, POV Second Person
Summary: Draco doesn’t smoke. Except when he needs to breathe.
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📜 Indebtedness by RecIt_Ralph
Rated: Teen and Up
Words: 50685
Tags: HP: EWE, Healer Draco Malfoy, Auror Harry Potter, Slow Build, Fluff and Angst, forgiving Harry, Chaptered, My First Fanfic, Swearing, Snark, Eventual Happy Ending, Second Chances, Getting to Know Each Other
Summary: Of all the Healers in all of St Mungo's - why does Harry always end up with Malfoy?
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📜 Best Laid Plans by CreateImagineWrite
Rated: Explicit
Words: 10105
Tags: Marriage Proposal, Lust Potion/Spell, Secret Relationship, Anal Sex, Established Relationship, Barebacking
Summary: He hadn’t intended to be fully clothed with Harry naked at this point, or to have just made him take an antidote to a poison or have had to Incarcerus him to the bed. But they’ve never had a very normal relationship anyways. And damn him if he’s going to let Ginevra Weasley get in the way of him marrying this man. Fourshot.
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📜 Iustitia & Prudentia by skeptique
Rated: Explicit
Words: 36302
Tags: Graphic Depictions of Violence, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Post-Hogwarts, Post-War, Auror Harry Potter, Healer Draco Malfoy, Bisexual Harry Potter, Gay Draco Malfoy, Redeemed Draco Malfoy, Mental Health Issues, Everyone is going to Therapy, Taking their Meds, Calling Their Person, Slow Burn, Procedural That's Fairly Light on the Procedural Part, Canon Content Warnings Apply, brief discussion of infertility, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Discussion of Ongoing Food Related Issues, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Canon Typical Violence, Kidnapping, Confinement, Pansexual Theo Nott, Case Fic, Mystery, Draco Malfoy in Glasses, Minor Character Death
Summary: Draco Malfoy’s entire life fell apart after the War. He’s putting it back together as best he can with what is available to him. But Harry keeps interfering and won’t leave him alone. When he agrees to be an Auror consultant to help Harry, is it more than he bargained for?
The world shifted under Harry Potter’s feet and he found himself lost and purposeless. He anchors himself in uncovering the truth about a dangerous pureblood terrorist group. Is Draco the key to solving these crimes, or is he a distraction?
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📜 To Do No Harm by Lokifan
Rated: Explciit
Words: 58114
Tags: Post-Hogwarts, HP: EWE, Quidditch, Getting Together, Getting Back Together, Hurt/Comfort, Recovering From The War And Becoming Better People, Quidditch Player Harry Potter, Healer Draco Malfoy, Community: hd_erised, Break Up
Summary: Draco hadn’t planned to end up as team Healer for the Chudley Cannons, but it’s a Healer job, so he’ll take it - and then Potter shows up, the glorious centre-of-attention Seeker, as ever. And someone with a grudge is sabotaging Quidditch teams, and it’s only a matter of time before the Aurors’ eyes turn to Draco.
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📜 To Prove We're Not in a Rut by gracerene
Rated: Explicit
Words: 2140
Tags: Established Relationship, Post-Hogwarts, Healer Draco, POV Harry Potter, Bottom Harry, Anal Sex, Anal Fingering, Wall Sex, well it's actually against a door, Top Draco, Bottom Harry Potter, Top Draco Malfoy
Summary: Draco and Harry are not in a rut. Draco sets out to prove it.
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📜 Tell Me the End at the Beginning by harryromper
Rated: Teen and Up
Words: 36591
Tags: Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Post-Hogwarts, St Mungo's Hospital, Healer Draco Malfoy, Auror Harry Potter, Auror Hermione Granger, Christmas, Christmas Tree, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Christmas Presents, Christmas Decorations, 25 Days of Harry and Draco, Food Hall Turkeys, Advent Calendar, Healer Luna Lovegood, Kreacher, Minor Neville Longbottom/Ginny Weasley, Yule Logs, Misheard Christmas carols
Summary: St Mungo’s is the last place anyone wants to spend the festive season. Harry finds himself there anyway.
Or: Harry's an Auror suspended from duty, Malfoy's wearing the hell out of three-piece suits, Hermione is entirely over everything, and Kreacher just wants to be left alone to decorate for Christmas.
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Face up - Chapter 2
Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Epilogue
Finally!!!
I wanted to finish the fic following the rest of the song from Chapter 1: ‘Face up’ by Lights (Lyrics in bold), which would have been easy and quite short, but then I had a little drama / misunderstanding idea and when I asked @ladyfreya123 she said me to go for it soooo... this turned out to be way longer than expected ^^; There’s also going to be an extra short epilogue.
Thank you @livrever for checking this for me!
AO3
_____________________________
Chapter 2
The next day Marinette did something totally out of her character: sneak out of her apartment, neglect her work, and go to the ‘Liberty’, that bar ship she went to the previous evening with her friends. She hoped to see the blue haired guitarist that picked more than her attention again. She got on the ship and moved to the bar counter, where the purple-haired waitress from the day before was arranging some bottles.
"Hi… May I ask you something?" Marinette asked, earning an affirmative nod from the tall woman. "When is Luka performing again…?"
"Sorry, nothing until next Friday" the goth waitress answered.
"Oh… Is there- Is there a way to contact him…?" she blushed.
The tall young woman let a tired sigh as if thinking 'not again' before giving her an answer. "Sorry Miss, but we don't offer this kind of service. We like to keep our staff's privacy"
"I- of course… I understand. I'll come again next Friday…" the blue eyed lady apologized, with a depressing look returning her face- a look the waitress recognized.
"Wait, you're the girl from yesterday aren't you? The one who had been feeling down"
"Ah, yes… That's right… I'm the one" Marinette awkwardly admitted.
"Hmm…" The tall woman analyzed her for a few seconds, her fingers touching her chin. "I see” she raised her eyebrow with a faint smirk. “Luka had never done anything like that before. I think you piqued his interest"
"Eh? His interest…? Re- really...? How?" She opened her eyes in surprise, her cheeks getting warmer.
"I don't know" the waitress shrugged. "Look. Luka is not here, but I'll give you something special if you buy a drink" she signaled the grey haired middle aged woman to take her place. "Wait a minute, I'll be right back"
"Ok…"
"Hi. What will it be?" The bar owner asked.
"Oh… One mango soft drink, please"
"WHAT!? A real pirate doesn't drink that! Have some rum!" The woman almost scolded her, violently pouring the drink in a glass that pushed towards the perplexed young lady.
Marinette nervously gulped as she looked speechless at the drink. Noticing how the owner's gaze was urging her to take it, Marinette felt intimidated under her stare. Luckily, the blond-haired waitress called her and she could recover her breath.
"Captain! Official Roger is asking for you"
"Argh!! Not again!" the grey-haired woman groaned.. "What's his problem now? My music is too low if I follow his 'law'. So annoying… Rose, I leave you this customer to you"
"Yes, Captain" she answered, focusing on Marinette and shoving the rum glass aside. "Hi, excuse the owner. What would you like?"
"Anything sweet, please" she sighed, grateful and relieved with a faint smile on her face.
____________________________
A few minutes later, the goth waitress returned. "Sorry for the wait" she said, her eyes attracted by the rainbow colored drink on Marinette’s long glass. "Rose, don't tell me you gave her your crazy original cocktail?" She sighed.
"Yes, Juleka! She loves it!" Rose grinned happily.
"Really…?" Her eyebrow arched in doubt. "I bet she's only faking it to not hurt your feelings… Anyway, here" She offered a DVD case to Marinette. "I don't usually do this, but we record all our performances and I'm making an exception and letting you have a copy of yesterday's live"
"Can I really have it!?" The designer's eyes glowed in hope.
"Only if you erase this terrible depressed expression from your face" she flicked Marinette's forehead with her finger. "Luka hates unhappy faces"
"Ouch!” she complained, touching his forehead before her grin became wider one second later. “Thank you so much! It means a lot to me!" She jumped, hugging the DVD case while the waitresses exchanged smiles. "See you next Friday! Oh, how much is the drink?"
"Nothing. I could never let you pay for Rose's disgusting original cocktail" Juleka teased.
"Hey! It tastes good!" Rose pouted.
"It tastes like strawberry syrup but with triple the amount of sugar." Juleka rolled her eyes.
"That's not true!" Rose complained. "Tell her, Marinette!"
"Yes, I like it. It's good"
Rose was now showing a proud smile while Juleka shrugged in defeat, one of her hands patting the blonde's shoulder.
"Rose, you're lucky a pure soul is willing to drink that sugary cocktail." Rose giggled at the tall woman's comment. "Feel free to come anytime. Uhm… Marinette, was it?"
"Ah, yes. Thank you so much. For the drink. And for the DVD. And for having me. See you soon!" She giggled while waving goodbye.
"Oh.. wanted her to taste my sparkling unicorn special drink too…" Rose pouted in a low voice.
"Oh Rose, it's ok. I'll take your sweetness later for you instead, how is that?" Juleka spoke close to her ear with a smirk.
"Yes!"
'I think I wasn’t supposed to hear that' Marinette thought, rushing out the bar with flustered cheeks and hugging the DVD.
_________________________________
It was just Wednesday and she was at the bar again. 'Why do I keep coming every single day? I know he only comes on Fridays…'
Marinette felt lonely. After awakening feelings of love again, she noticed how lonely she actually was. When did her loneliness start? Was it something that comes together with growing older? She didn't even realize how single and solitary she was before Luka's performance. She seemed fine on her own, she mostly was... but last Friday proved her wrong.
It had been hours alone at the bar, ignoring her work and phone calls and, as expected, the guitarist was nowhere to be found. The bar was not as crowded as last Friday. In fact, it wasn’t to the point that it couldn't even compare- she almost felt bad for the blond guy performing. When the clock on the wooden wall turned to 11:30 PM, she sighed in defeat. She took her wallet out of her purse to pay for her 'sparkling unicorn drink' and her mango soft drink and got ready to go home, expecting to have better luck tomorrow. She raised her hand slightly to call the waitress.
"Excuse m-"
"Hey. Didn't I mention no sad faces were allowed here?"
A familiar voice cut her from the side, close to her ear. It startled her, making her gasp, but her pupils lit up as she turned and her gaze met the blue eyes she had been eager to see for days. She couldn't help to blush at his closeness, unable to control her wide but shy smile. He smiled back at her and her reaction.
"That's better" he winked, resting his arm at the bar counter. "So you've come back, huh? Did you enjoy your time here last Friday? Are you feeling better?" Luka attentively asked.
He kept smiling at her, melting the young woman's insides. She flustered in realization. "You remember me?"
"Of course. Not many people come here looking as terrible as you did. You seem better now. I'm glad"
"Oh- Uhm- Thank you…" she lowered her head to hide her blush under her bangs.
"What brings you here? Today's performances are Electro-pop, but you don't look like you're interested in those?" He curiously asked.
Marinette looked back at the stage. "I guess you're right… I've never really liked XY…" she confessed and Luka snorted.
"Wanna know a secret? Me neither. We just keep him because his father pays us"
"We? Us?" she blinked twice.
"Ah, crap." He noticed his mistake. “I mean the owner- Anarka" he answered.
"Oh…"
"Lu, it’s fine. You can tell her" Juleka approached, and Rose nodded in agreement. Luka seemed uncertain, but that didn't stop Juleka. "You see? Luka is my older brother and the bar owner is our mother. We all live together here, except for Luka when he's out studying abroad"
"Jules…" Luka glared at his sister. "You can't give customers private information about us, you know that. Mom is going to kill us if she finds out…"
"She's not a customer, she's our friend. We can tell a friend. Especially when she's-" Juleka's words were cut by Marinette in panic, scared she would let him know about her feelings for him.
"Aaahh! It's ok! Thank you for telling me, Juleka. I'm not going to tell anyone! Not even my best friend!" she promised. The women were smiling while Luka let a deep sigh out.
"Anyway, may I join you?" Luka asked Marinette, titling his head to get a better angle of her face.
"Her name is Marinette," Rose interrupted and winked at him.
"I think he already knows by now, Rose. Especially after-"
"Shh…" Luka signaled, his index finger in front of his lips in a warning. "Don't continue Jules, or I may spill the beans about you know what…"
"My bad" Juleka apologized under Rose's confused expression and Luka's knowing look.
"So… Marinette? Fancy a drink with me?" The young man returned his attention to her, making her blush as he pronounced her name in his voice. Marinette stared at him in awe. She short-circuited. "Marinette?"
"Ah- yes! I mean- Really? Is it really ok...?" She blushed.
Luka looked back at the designer after shushing his sister and her girlfriend, who giggled at the scene. "Yes, it's fine. I want to have some drinks too and I'm sure it's going to taste better with company"
"Oh… ok… Let me remove my jacket from this seat..." She offered.
"No, not here" Luka stopped her movement by placing his hand on her jacket and getting closer to whisper close to her ear. "We're starting to get looks on us. Go outside, turn left and go upstairs. It says staff only, but you have my permission to go. Wait for me there. I'll come in a second". He moved farther and lifted her jacket. "Don't forget to put on your jacket. It's cold outside"
"Oh- Ok…" Marinette blushed while rushing out to follow his directions. She tripped on her feet when walking up the stairs, still flustered by the unexpected invitation.
After Marinette left, Luka waited for Rose and Juleka to prepare some drinks, and kept unavoidably smiling while seeing Marinette turning left once out the door. The ladies smirked at his rare expression.
"Lu. We like her. Don't mess up, ok?" Juleka stated and Rose nodded effusively. Luka rolled his eyes with a subtle blush on his cheeks until he eyed the glasses Rose had just handed him.
"Are you really planning to make Marinette drink that?" He looked at Rose's original cocktail raising an eyebrow in disgust.
"Why does everyone complain about it? It's delicious! Marinette thinks so too!" Rose pouted.
"Think about it, Rose. Luka isn't much into sweet drinks. How can he kiss the girl if you make her drink that?" Juleka teased.
"Oh… Oh, no! You're right! Let me prepare something else!" Rose excitedly exclaimed and Juleka smirked triumphantly at Luka, who rolled his eyes in response.
"First she would have to want to get kissed, you know…? And what makes you think I-" he could foresee Juleka's counterattack before it happened, so he surrendered beforehand. "Nevermind"
"Oh, she would be more than happy to kiss you, I know that much" Rose grinned, handing him the new drink while sharing a knowing smile with Juleka.
"Whatever" the musician sighed, grabbing the glasses and a pair of bottles of his favorite liquor and moving upstairs. Juleka knew her brother well enough to know he had a smile on his face even if she could only see his back.
___________________
The upper part of the boat was nicer than Marinette had expected. The decorations there were fancier than downstairs and despite it kept the pirate theme, colorful flowers surrounded the space, like a little garden in the middle of the river. It was chilly since it was late September, but the breeze felt nice on Marinette's flustered face (perfect to help her cool down).
Marinette moved to the river side to enjoy the view of Paris at night time. The city was shining bright, beautifully, she has seen it multiple times from her apartment. And despite that, the view from the ship felt more special and even prettier and magical, she couldn't seem to find light inside of her. Her monotonous life was draining her, and her lack of inspiration didn't help her either.
Why…?
She shouldn't be thinking about that. Luka had invited her! And that was clearly the first spark she felt in a long time. She should be happy! Why was it always negative thoughts that stand out the most? She knew it was wrong, but her negativity kept spiraling... She had given Luka a bad first impression and he had probably invited her just because she looked pitiful. Why would he be interested in a workaholic and depressing woman like her, anyway? Someone plain and boring, more like a heartless robot than alive most of the time. It was impossible, wasn't it? Plus, he was going to find popularity and fame soon and he may have so many beautiful fans around him, definitely a better audience than her.
She sighed again. She knew she was being crazy- acting like one of those fangirls from the previous week. Because, in the end, she knew almost nothing about him. 'I'm not special. I'm not amazing as he is'. But she still wished, hoped, for this new found love to not end like her previous one. She wished to feel alive again, like last Friday night when he was on that stage and his eyes met hers.
And her crush on him was making her feel alive again, which was exactly what she wanted. But she was afraid everything could end in a blink before it even started. And with those thoughts in mind, some tears started forming in her eyes. What if he rejected her? It was crazy to think he would accept her feelings just like that. They had just met. Geez- it was the first time they even talked! What was she even expecting? He was out of her league, she convinced herself, and the thought alone made her feel lonely again. Back to her lifeless life.
"Sorry for the wait." Luka arrived, and when her face turned to him, he noticed her tears. "Hey, what's wrong? No crying allowed here, remember?" He emphatically said, placing the drinks on the table and approaching her.
"Sorry... I don't know what's gotten into me..." she tried to stop her sobbing, with no results.
"Easy. Shhhh... A beautiful face like yours shouldn't get tainted with anything, especially not tears" he said, offering her a handkerchief she hesitantly accepted. "Listen"
Luka took a few steps away to get some space as he took his acoustic guitar from his back and started playing a familiar song. When her eyes locked on his, he started singing the lyrics she had listened to hundreds of times on the DVD Juleka gave her.
The times you don't wanna wake up
'Cause in your sleep it's never over when you give up
The sun is always gonna rise up
You need to get up, gotta keep your head up
Look at the people all around you
The way you feel is something everybody goes through
Dark out, but you still gotta light up
You need to wake up, gotta keep your face up
"Sing with me, Marinette"
"Luka…" she whimpered.
"C'mon!" He encouraged her, and she started singing with him. At first, she just babbled the chorus between sobs, but after a few repeats, her voice started making sense as she sang in unmatching rhythms. His music dragged her face to smile faintly.
Alive again.
"There you go," Luka smiled tenderly, making her blush. "Your bad times are just a phase. This bad stage is going to end. Take it easy and be yourself. You are good enough"
"Am I really, though…?" She furrowed her eyebrows.
"I have no doubts" he assured her with a bright smile that made Marinette's heart throb. But doubt and fear still remained.
"How can you say that? You don't know me. Or my life. Or my feelings! How can you say that so lightly?" She gasped at her own words, immediately regretting them. Why was she even getting angry? She was making Luka pay for her frustration and that was horrible. Before she could apologize, he interrupted her.
"Because you're sincere, Marinette. Your heart, your eyes, your gestures, your voice, your whole aura- they all tell me about you." He stared at her eyes. "Not only verbal language can communicate. I myself work better with music rather than words. And with those pieces of information together, I can tell you're going through a bad phase, lost motivation, maybe you're not even sure about where you want to go or your purpose in life, but that's normal. As the song says, everyone goes through that at some point. I did have one myself too"
"You… You did?" She asked, incredulous.
"Is it that surprising? You can ask Juleka, if you don't believe me. I'm not perfect- nobody is." He shrugged with a sympathetic smile. "But that's not the point. I can see your potential whenever I look at you. The Marinette from last Friday shone brighter than a diamond to me. I've known you were special from the first time my eyes landed on you, and, the more I see you, the more convinced I am. You're extraordinary, Marinette, and your heart song is the most beautiful I've ever heard." The young woman couldn't help but blush and show a hopeful wide smile at Luka's words. "Now, that's a beautiful smile! There's no way anyone can deny you anything to that" He smiled while staring at her eyes.
"Even you?" She involuntarily asked, and his eyes opened wide. "Ah-" her hands rushed to cover her mouth.
"I would be the first to fall for it" he laughed, but kept the second part to himself: 'if I already hadn't'
Marinette blushed even harder. Luka was even more impressive than she thought. Wasn't it too good to be real? Too incredible. Especially for someone like her.
This wasn't a crush, she realized. The spark in her heart was something more- the warmth she felt and the butterflies in her stomach… all of it made it obvious.
It was LOVE.
Was it even possible? So fast, so easily.
"It pains me to see how you don't believe in yourself and your potential," Luka continued. "Besides, Juleka and Rose like you, and let me tell you, that's already a big accomplishment."
Marinette's smile became even brighter but shy. "I like them too. Do you think they'll want to become my friends?"
"You heard them downstairs. I'm quite sure they already consider you that. Just how much time have you spent here since last Friday?" He teased, and Marinette flustered red, mumbling something incomprehensible that made Luka smile even wider before returning to the topic. "Anyway, don't put fences or walls to yourself. Life itself will already do that, there's no need for you to add more unnecessary difficulties. Try to give more credit to your positive features instead of blaming yourself for the negative ones. Flow with it"
"What if I can't? Or what if it's not a fence, but an unbreakable wall?" She asked, thinking of her neverending work routine and Audrey Bourgeois.
"Nothing is unbreakable, Marinette. You just need to believe you can do it. And if you can't go straight through it, then you can go around it, or even jump over it. Maybe get help too. There is nothing wrong in getting support when you need it. Definitely nothing to be ashamed of" Luka strummed the strings of his acoustic guitar lightly, in an unknown melody that spoke to her heart. She could relate those new tunes more than to any song she had ever heard. She closed her eyes to enjoy the notes that ran from her ears to her heart. Luka looked at her smile, pleased. "That's my favorite part of playing music, you know? Help people feel better and put smiles on their faces. And it's specially rewarding when is someone as beautiful and pure as you"
Marinette stared astonished at his fond expression. His smile was so perfect she wondered if it was even real.
"Marinette?" He called. "Let's enjoy this moment, this view, the breeze. Forget about all bad things for now. Take it easy and relax. Have a drink with me?" he suggested, pointing at the glasses on the table with a welcoming smile.
Marinette’s eyes glowed in awe. She had thought she would be fine with just a little bit of Luka, even if it was only during his performances. But now? She wanted it ALL. She wanted to feel as alive as she felt whenever he was close. She wanted her love- this electric feeling to be mutual and last forever.
With those feelings in mind, her face rose up to meet his blue eyes with conviction.
"Thank you, Luka. I won't be looking down anymore," she proclaimed, and took the glass Luka offered her. Once in her hand, Luka lifted his tall glass, encouraging her to cheer with him.
"Face up?" he smiled, satisfied as she confidently bumped her glass to his. "Face up" she replied, and drank the alcohol while staring at his eyes and returning him a shy smile under his gaze.
With their empty glasses on the table, and without even noticing, naturally, they started leaning towards each other, lost in the deepness of their eyes. Their faces were barely a few centimeters apart, his fingertips brushed her skin and her hands moved to his chest. Their lips were almost touching when two voices interrupted them.
"OMG!! Isn't that Luka!?" "OMG, yes he is!!" "LUKA!!" KYAAAH" Two fangirls called from the nearest bridge.
Marinette jumped and backed away, nervously, and Luka turned around to awkwardly wave at them from afar after giving Marinette an apologetic look.
"Lukaaa!! Let's go have some fun?" "Yeah, like old times!" "Yeah, come have fun with us"
Luka turned to Marinette in alarm, and her mouth twisted.
"Sorry, girls! I'm not interested. Go have fun on your own" he told them off, somewhat angry, and they protested.
"Shh… He's already with someone!" One of the girls said to the other. "Hey! Didn't you say you didn't do that anymore? Liar!" "Oh, c'mon! She looks boring! Come with us instead, you'll have more fun!"
Marinette's expression turned into a mix of betrayal, sadness, anger and embarrassment.
She felt like the spell he had casted on her just faded away and Luka's heart ached in guilt and frustration.
"Shut up! I told you I’m not interested! Stop insisting! Don't you know what NO means!?" Luka finally yelled, losing his usual cool. But the fangirls continued.
"Oh, we may be scaring the lady! Poor thing, thinking she can have Luka all by herself..." "Have fun with your boring catch. How disappointing…" "What a shame…" "It's his loss, girl! Let's go" "Yeah, whatever" the pair of fangirls finally walked away.
Luka exhaled deeply and nervously turned to Marinette. "Sorry, Marinette. It's not what you think. Fangirls can get very annoying..."
Marinette's eyebrow arched, both demanding and hurt. "Not what I think? You owe me no explanation..." she was more hurt than she was willing to admit, and her face was at the lowest yet.
'It was my fault for having expectations… of course it was too beautiful to be real… Why did she even think she could be special to someone like him? To have him all by herself? She didn't know him! She thought he was amazing and sweet and caring… but her first impression has been proven wrong- absolutely wrong' she thought.
"Marinette! You're misunderstanding! I don't date fans, that's my policy!"
"So you just play around with them? Is this why you invited me? Am I your toy for tonight?"
She wanted to cry. She had fallen in love with an illusion. Of course someone that perfect couldn't exist. What was she thinking? She should have learned her lesson with Adrien, but this time was even worse. It hurt. A lot. More than a heartbreak ever hurt her. Because, this time, it also took hope away with her.
"No! Of course not-! You're getting it all wrong! That's all in the past! I was young and stupid- and... I don't do that anymore." He sounded so desperate Marinette almost believed him. "I wouldn't have invited you if I didn't genuinely mean it. Believe me, please" He pleaded, but she directed a glacial glare at him.
"Right… so that's what you say to all your fangirls, huh? No wonder they all fall for you. But I guess I have nothing else to do here: I know your policy now. I won't make you break it. Goodbye"
'How stupid of me to have hope something magical or exciting could happen to me. All that time invested for nothing. Not only out of his league, but also a playboy who had taken advantage of her weak state to seduce her with pretty words and music. How pitiful she was!
She wouldn't have minded to be his even if it was only for a night until moments ago. But now, she had decided she wanted it all- mutual love. And it was obvious he didn't feel the same.
Before leaving, her eyes darted to the empty glasses of alcohol. She grabbed one of the bottles Luka brought with him and refilled her glass violently. Luka was too late to react, before she drank it in one shot.
"Marinette, wait-"
Too late. The alcohol was already making her feel dizzy. That wasn't the soft drinks she used to drink, neither water: it reeked of alcohol. Logical, since it was something strong Rose prepared for Luka, not for Marinette. And her tolerance was incredibly low (which is why she always went with soft drinks in the first place). Luka rushed to catch the young woman when she slowly fainted.
"Marinette? Hey! Wake up. Open your eyes. C'mon! Don't do this to me" he lightly shook her small body. "Come back, please. You've got it wrong" he insisted, but Marinette left a light snore that made him calm down in relief. "Why are words so complicated…?" He sighed in worry.
After confirming she was deep asleep and nothing made it seem like she would wake up anytime soon, Luka carried Marinette in a princess style downstairs in concern.
"Marinette!" Rose gasped and rushed to her friend in Luka's arms.
"What have you done, dumbass? Is she ok?" Juleka slightly hit his arm, before checking on Marientte.
"Yes… Yes. She's just sleeping. The alcohol was too much…” He lamented. “Do you know where she lives? Or any relative or friend?"
The waitresses shook their heads in negation, and exchanged a worried look. "Lu… What happened up there?"
"I guess I'm still not good with words…" he shrugged, after a long silence, letting the Marinette's body rest on his bed. Juleka and Rose exchanged a worried look watching Marinette sleeping in distress, mumbling Luka's name in her dreams.
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The next morning, Marinette woke up in an unknown room. 'Where? What? How? Why? When…?'
Music coming from the next room startled her. 'That song…?' It was a song she had never heard before, yet it felt familiar for some reason. 'Who is playing it?' stepping out of the room, she realized where she was: the Liberty.
She jolted in realization and she looked at herself in the mirror. She looked horrible, but her clothes were still the same. She sighed in relief. 'What happened?' before she could think more, her eyes met Luka's in one of the couches.
"Good morning. How are you feeling?" He asked her with a soft and apologetic smile.
"I- ugh… my head… what happened?"
"You don't remember?" He asked and she shook her head. "You passed out," he explained, signaling for her to take a seat. She complied. "You seriously startled me, Marinette. It was so sudden... And since you didn't seem to wake up, I let you sleep on my bed"
"Oh- sorry… and thank you…" she muttered, looking down, embarrassed.
"Hey. No more looking down, remember? Face up" He raised his own face in encouragement.
"Face up" she repeated, following his lead with a shy smile.
“You know? About yesterday… I want to-” Luka started, breaking the silence, but Juleka interrupted them.
"Lu, the label called you. You better say yes this time or-" Juleka noticed her friend. "Oh, sorry. I didn't know you were still here, Marinette. How are you feeling?"
"Better, thank you," Marinette answered. 'Label?' She wondered.
"Jules. Marinette's got a headache. Could you give her some medicine while I'm on the phone, please?" Luka asked Juleka and she smiled tenderly, aiding her friend to the counter.
"Here" Juleka offered her an aspirin and a glass of water, and Marinette accepted. Juleka noticed how Marinette kept staring at Luka's direction with curiosity.
"Luka had an appointment 10 minutes ago. Jagged Stone's label wants him to sign a contract with them" Juleka explained, proudly. "He has been turning them down for weeks, but this time he seemed to have decided to sign. That's why he came back one day earlier than usual, actually. Isn't my dumbass brother amazing?"
A contract… with Jagged Stone's label? Luka was going to sign it? Marinette remembered Nino's words: 'he's gonna be big in no time'. She had agreed with that affirmation… She just didn't expect it so early. So sudden. Where would their chances be if he became famous…? With all his fangirls- wait- what was that about fangirls?
She remembered.
"Fangirls" Marinette mumbled to a confused Juleka. "Why did you lie to me, Juleka? You said I was special, but Luka just thinks of me as a fan! And he doesn't date fans! Were you making fun of me?"
"What? Of course, no! Where did you get those ideas from?"
"Those fangirls from yesterday said it, and Luka confirmed"
"That dumbass…" Juleka's tongue clicked and Marinette started to cry. "Hold on, Marinette. You're misunderstanding everything. It's true Luka had a 'rebellious stage', but that's part of the past now, he's different now. If he invited you it's because he is really interested in you. I promise. He ditched the meeting with the music label so he was there when you woke up and he even-"
"How can I know you're not lying?" Marinette demanded in a yell and Juleka looked at her in shock.
"We hate lies, Marinette. We may be chaotic and a bit crazy, but we're always honest. Luka too." Juleka explained, hurt by her friend's distrust.
At that moment, Luka returned. "Sorry- I have to go now. Will you be- Marinette?" Luka cut them, and the fashion designer showed him an enraged expression and took her things and rushed out.
"Marinette, wait!" Both siblings called, but she didn’t stop. Luka ran and somehow caught her by the wrist and Marinette was finally letting go of the tears she had been holding. "Marinette…!"
"Let me go, Luka!”
"You remember the misunderstanding," Luka realized. "Let me explain, please," he begged.
"No! I don't want to hear it. Do you want to make me look even more pathetic? I'm sick of it! I'm sick of my own stupidity. Falling in love with you was a mistake!"
"Love...?" His jaw fell, leaving him puzzled with his mouth open.
"You have fun with your fangirls, you don't date fans as per your policy and you'll soon be famous internationally and forget I exist! Coming here every day was a waste of time. Goodbye, Luka. Good luck with your life" she freed herself from his weakened grip and started running away.
Luka's feet were glued to the floor in shock. Did she really say love?
"What are you doing!? Go after her, stupid!" Juleka shouted and Luka snapped out.
"Shit!" Luka ran, "Marinette!" but she was nowhere to be found. "No… Dammit!" He cursed.
When he returned to the Liberty, Juleka and Rose scolded him. "You better pray for her to be here tomorrow evening for your performance. But now go and sign that contract before they give up on you. Hurry up!" Luka nodded, took his guitar with him and started walking, deep lost in his thoughts.
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As soon as Marinette arrived at her apartment, she let herself fall on the bed and started crying uncontrollably. She received some phone calls and messages, but she didn't feel strong enough to check. She was supposed to be working at Audrey's at that hour- of course she would call. Her boss was going to kill her. But she didn't care. Instead, she played again the live performance of the previous Friday, when she felt more alive than ever. Music to accompany and silence her tears- tears of heartbreak and betrayal.
Once again, she let her negativity win. Again… And without listening to his excuses.
She felt at her lowest yet.
____________________________
And just with that, in a blink of an eye, Friday arrived.
Marinette coped with heartbreak with stress working- she had a lot to catch up after the time she had spent in the Liberty the past days, and she worked better under stress, anyway. At 6 PM a message from Alya arrived on her phone.
'Girl, we're going with Nino to Liberty again. Wanna come? Your hot guitarist will be playing tonight! We'll be waiting for you there!'
She ignored the message.
________________
Just before 11PM, the Liberty was absolutely crowded. The last performance had ended, and people could already feel the rush in anticipation for Luka's performance. But the musician wasn't feeling it as he usually did. He had been rewatching past Friday's performance in loop, focusing on Marinette exclusively. He felt terrible. An unfortunate misunderstanding due to the past he was ashamed of, had come to chase him at the worst possible moment- the moment he had finally found the person with the heart song he had always wished for.
It was past the time for Luka's performance, so Juleka knocked and entered his cabin to call for him. "It's time"
"Marinette…?" He asked and she shook her head in negation, biting her lip. He sighed deeply.
Once at the stage, he looked at the empty chair he had reserved for Marinette in the first row, and then he looked around to confirm she wasn't there, indeed. He was sad, more than he had been in a while, but the Liberty was a place to be happy and he was a professional, so he had to give it his all, like always. Only those who really knew him (or really devoted fans like Nino) would be able to notice something was wrong with him.
"Good evening, everyone! Thank you for coming. Ready for some rock & roll?"
"Yeah!!" "Woohoo!"
_____________________
Marinette checked the clock on the wall of her apartment: 11:58 PM. Despite her efforts, she couldn't take Luka and the Liberty out of her mind.
Luka's performance would be ending right now, she thought, moving forward the DVD recording to the moment he thanked the audience and fans had asked for an encore. At that moment, he had asked her and only her, if she wanted one too, and she raised her voice like she never had before. It felt great, she remembered. ALIVE. The video ended when Luka left the stage, mentioning a new song. Did he play it tonight? She wondered, but she had no way to know, because she hadn't been there and his performance had already ended...
The clock pointed past midnight when she buried her face in the pillow, tears finding their way out.
________________________
At the same time, at the bar, Alya and Nino were talking at the counter.
"Woah Alya! It was amazing! Too bad Marinette didn't come. I thought she enjoyed last week?"
"I know… She's been stress-working since yesterday, it seems. Something must have happened, but she's keeping it for herself. I wish I could help her more… She should be enjoying her youth! Falling in love and-"
Suddenly, fangirl squealing started and Alya and Nino felt a hand on their shoulders that startled them. Neither expected to find Luka when they turned.
"You two- You're Marinette's friends, aren't you? From last week-" He asked and they nodded when their voice refused to come out, shocked and processing what was happening. "I need a favor, please." Luka asked.
Alya and Nino exchanged a look and followed him to his cabin, shoving his fangirls away as they walked through the crowd.
_________________________
‘Girl. You better tell me what's going on asap, because I'm losing my mind’
Marinette stared confused at the screen as a new message arrived on her phone: a video. Marinette was a little unsure to play it seeing Luka in the preview image, but her longing feelings for him and her curiosity won over her fears.
She played it.
"Hi again, everyone. Ugh" Luka looked unexpectedly nervous. "I know it's way past the time we're allowed to 'be noisy', so I'm going to make it quick before agent Roger comes and gives the owner one of his fines." Some people laughed at the back. "I composed this song for a special lady who, sadly, isn't here today- which is why I asked these amazing people to make it reach her. Thank you, guys!" 'He called us amazing!' Nino fuzzed and Alya laughed at her boyfriend. "Anyway- I hope I make myself more clear with this song than with words. This song is for you, Marinette"
Marinette's eyes opened big and she audibly gasped. A song for her…? She knew that melody- the one he was practicing and that reached her heart. And the lyrics…
A confession of love…? Could it be…? She felt tears in her eyes, moved by the perfect harmony between the acoustic guitar's melody, the lyrics he sang with his beautiful angelic voice and the conveyed feelings through it… His feelings for her- his love and his wish for her to be confident and shine.
The song ended and he looked directly at the camera.
"Marinette, I'm sorry for our misunderstanding. I hope I made myself clear this time. Whenever you want, if you want- of course-, you know where to find me. I'll wait for you."
Marinette let out a restrained cry as she pressed the replay button.
______________________________________
Luka was at the upper part of the ship, alone, with a tall glass in front of him. He had only taken a sip, and had focused on his guitar instead, playing 'Marinette's song' tunes.
It had been hours since Marinette's friends- Alya and Nino- had sent her the video, but she didn't appear or reply to them. Being almost 4 AM, he wasn't expecting much. 'So my feelings didn't reach her, huh?' He sighed in defeat.
"Didn't you say no sad faces were allowed here? Or do you have privileges? Because that's unfair"
Luka turned his head and met Marinette's eyes, who had just seated next to him, bringing out all her courage. His face immediately lit up in relief.
"Marinette. You came" he smiled. "Did you-"
"Did you really mean it? The song… those feelings..." she asked in determination. Her heart was about to burst out in both fear and expectation.
"All of it" Luka didn't even flutter, no doubt in his voice.
"Hmm…" Marinette secretly smiled under her bangs and soon, her eyes darted to his drink. She blinked in surprise. "Rose's unicorn special drink? I would have never expected you would like it."
"I don't. I have no idea how you can drink this, actually. It's way too sweet" he stuck his tongue out in disgust and Marinette's lips curved wider.
"Then…" her hand moved to cup the rainbow colored glass. "I hope you don't mind it if…"
"Go ahead- sorry it's not very cold anymore..."
Was she doing it on purpose? Licking her lips, so teasingly after taking a sip… He was feeling all hot out of the sudden, so he rolled his sleeves up. His throat felt suddenly dry.
Still seated next to him, Marinette moved her head to rest it on his shoulder. "Could you sing again...?"
"Of course. Which part?" He strummed his guitar's strings, but she didn't answer and just hummed, as if she was telling him to guess it. "Ok, let me guess. Maybe that you're…
'An extraordinary girl. Clear like a musical note, sincere as a melody. The song that's been playing in my head since our first encounter'
He sang and she blushed, shaking her head. "Not this one? What about this then?" He continued.
'Clear all the fog around you and raise your voice to shine, like the diamond you are.
A bright smile no one can deny.
Don't be afraid to feel ALIVE'
She shook her head again, and he sang another part, hopefully.
'You're the one in my heart, the perfect melody to admire'
Marinette's smile widened, but she shook her head once again. It didn't pass him how she looked at him from under her lashes.
'Face up, so I can see your glowing eyes and your dazzling smile'
Always up, never behind, don't be afraid to take my hand.
A new love story to write, the clock no longer in standby.
Give me a second chance and I'll never say goodbye'
Redness found its way to Marinette's face, as she hummed happily. Luka smiled back at her, equally happy, but Marinette didn't have enough yet. She stood up and yelled loudly to the river: "Encore!"
Luka laughed, remembering their first meeting one week ago. "You want an encore? Any requests?" He asked, confidently.
“I want to listen to something PURE” she blushed. “Something that tells me your feelings are genuine as mine. Something that tells me that I’m special to you. Something to clear all the uncertainty I may have left…"
Luka listened to her attentively, and after giving a thought, he knew exactly what to play. He left his guitar aside and took a step closer to Marinette- very close. She was trembling but expectant when he held her hand, exhaled deeply and pressed the palm of her hand on his chest.
His heartbeat.
"This. This is new, even for me. It only happens when you're around, Marinette. And if you allow me to kiss you, I'll prove it right. Shall I?" Marinette opened her eyes wide and her face flustered again. Next, she nodded, and looked up so he could brush his lips to hers softly, carefully, treasuring the feeling the contact gave them… With her hand still on his chest, Marinette noticed how their heartbeat soon beat as one. In unison. Matching tempo, same feelings of love. And that was the best encore she could have ever received.
She was certain now: like the song said, she had cleared up all the fog and was ready to hold his hand without ever looking back.
And with that, all her fears vanished. No more redness on her face. No more stammering. No more nerves. No more negative feelings. She just felt as she always wished.
ALIVE.
More than ever.
Confidently, Marinette raised her glass and drank it whole while staring at Luka’s eyes. Luka gulped, feeling thirsty out of the sudden.
"Marinette. I think I made my feelings clear now. Will you give me an answer? Or at least say yes to a date?" Luka asked, a little impatient.
"I thought you didn't date fans…?" She teased.
"You're not a fan, Marinette. What kind of fan would miss their favorite artist's live performance on purpose? You're the one my heart chose and the most beautiful person I've ever met. You inspire me to compose a thousand songs"
"I can't be your fan, then?" She tilted her head to the side, playfully.
"You can be whatever you want, Marinette," he assured, and her smile brightened.
"Even your one and only official girlfriend?" She said, reaching for his arm.
"Please be?" He almost begged.
Marinette felt shy out of the sudden. "Yes… I really want to" She nodded and hid her blush burying her face on his shoulder.
"Marinette. Face up" Luka reminded her, happily, and she raised her head to meet his eyes directly, lost in its blueness and his loving smile. One of his hands moved to her hair, brushing her bangs to have a better look at her face, while the other held her hand steadily. Her face flustered and her fingers squeezed back at his. Slowly, they moved closer until their lips melted in a tender kiss. A slow, longer kiss followed.
"That drink sure is sweet" Luka mentioned, licking his lips and making Marinette smile. "But it's not that bad, I guess. I think I could get used to it…" he said, and Marinette giggled.
"See? I told you it was good!" A high-pitched voice yelled from the stairs, followed by a loud gasp.
"Rose!" Another voice called.
"Ah-" the blond lady covered her mouth. "Sorry, keep going! We're not looking! Or listening! We're just here- chilling- we won't interrupt! Go on!"
Luka rolled his eyes and Marinette giggled again. Soon, Juleka excused Rose and dragged her downstairs, giving the new couple some privacy.
"They were worried about you, you know? Don't get mad at them"
"I know" Marinette smiled widely. "I have to apologize to them later, especially to Juleka. What I said… I'm sorry I didn't listen to your explanations…" she lamented, looking down.
"Shhh… That's for later." Luka shushed her and tilted her face up with his hand under her chin. "Do you have more spare kisses to share or are you tired?"
"I- I do have them… a lot, actually" she blushed at his closeness. "And you?"
"For you? I don’t think I could ever get tired of them" he gave her a short kiss, before continuing. "But next time drink something else, please. You're sweet enough, I don't need the extra amount of sugar" Marinette laughed and pressed her lips to his. And he immediately kissed her back. "I love you, Marinette"
"I love you too, Luka" she embraced him closer, her face finding comfort in his arms.
And like that, they kissed until the sunrise.
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A Moment Of Glory
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Chapter 7; Parva Sub Ingenti
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Chapter 8 babyyyyyyyyyyy! Oh man, the next chapters to come are not going to be fun for Henry. I also had to rewrite this chapter like... Halfway through finishing the third-to-last chapter bc I realized that this route would be better to go with <3
Also, note, in case I did not make it clear in the actual chapter: it’s a week’s timeskip between this chapter and last chapter!
Also also! Since I have written all chapters now, I would not mind to update more frequently if that would be desired! Either I can hold onto the schedule I have rn (twice a week - Wednesday and Saturday) or I can change it so I update three times a week, Wednesday, Friday, and Sunday? I would very much like some opinions on how often to update!
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Wordcount: 4300
Chapter summary: Brokenshire and the Scotland Yard come to a disappointing discovery, but waste no time in following a new lead.
CW [for this chapter]: Mentions of blood, mentions of murder.
[Ao3]
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Chapters:
[Prologue] [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10] [11] [12] [Epilogue]
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Sergeant Enoch Brokenshire, a man who so often took pride in the loyalty and hard work he put into his position in the Scotland Yard, did not like his night duty.
He sat by his lone desk, elbows placed upon the only empty space on his messy workspace that was not already occupied by paperwork. The only source of light that found itself in the dark office was a flickering flame from a tiny, half-melted candle that was placed next to him, so bravely and so obediently bringing light to the documents that had caught his sole attention. For once, it was completely quiet. Not even the normal noises from the world going on and on outside could be heard tonight; no drunkards laughing their way home from the pubs, no footsteps from late-night wanderers exploring the streets, not even the sound of other officers standing guard outside seemed to find its way into the office. Had Brokenshire not long since gotten accustomed to the eerie silence that so specifically seemed to haunt him tonight, he might have found the loneliness and the quietness a bit depressing, a bit bleak. Perhaps it was merely because he had one of the most boring, yet most important jobs tonight. Perhaps it was merely because he was waiting. Perhaps it was merely because he was alone.
Of every late-night duty he could have gotten, Brokenshire got the unfortunate luck of being stuck in his office for the evening. He could have been out wandering the corridors of this very station, maybe checking on one of the few currently held in the cells in the basements, or maybe he could have been patrolling the streets with Wipple and Jenkins like he normally did. Maybe he could have been breaking up gang fights, catching thieves, or inspecting the new shipments and arrivals by the docks and train stations in search of stolen goods, but no, he was stuck waiting for his two colleagues. A soft sigh of boredom escaped his lips, and yet he decided to occupy his time by gazing over the many documents laid upon his so often neat desk, the shiny wooden surface now hidden under dozens of chaotically sprawled papers. His eyes traveled, and yet it did not take long until his gaze was caught by a single photograph that displayed none other than Dr. Henry Jekyll, stapled to a short investigative essay about the doctor’s career in London, written and documented in hopes of getting a bit of insight about the whole case. Through the two weeks that had recently passed since his estimated disappearance, it felt like they hadn’t managed to get a single step closer to figuring out what had happened to him, who did it and where he was currently located. They could find no possible motives; after all, Dr. Jekyll was a beloved man. No one seemed to have any ideas of someone who had actively disliked him, rather than his work and connection to yet-so-stigmatized science, yet they were stuck on the single ‘suspect’ they had gotten from finding branded trinkets on the crime scene. They had interrogated practically every single person that had lived on the streets by the Society, and yet there hadn’t been a single witness, not a single trail to follow-- not even the blood that had so horrifyingly splattered upon almost every surface in the entire study had been found anywhere outside of the room, not in the corridors outside nor by the broken window. It seemed like the doctor had just disappeared in thin air, once he was, assumingly, dragged out of that window. It didn’t make sense. It didn’t make sense at all and yet this wasn’t even one of the most gruesome or violent cases the Sergeant had gotten his hands on, no, but it was still so very unnerving, maybe because of the specific circumstances, maybe because it was specifically Dr. Jekyll everything was about. No matter, it was unnerving regardless and Brokenshire was going to stand by that fact, and yet he couldn’t help but let out another sigh. Another sigh among the thousands he had made just this night. Another sigh among the thousands to come.
He felt how his eyes began to roam once more, and yet they did not wander for long before they were caught by a second photograph; this one displayed the second subject of the mess of his desk, one Mr. Richard Crawford. Having found his name-engraved jewelry on the crime scene, the opposition, aggression, and hatred that Crawford harbored for the Society for Arcane Sciences had only seemed to confirm their suspicion of him as a suspect, and since there were no more suspects at all, he was currently their main lead as well, yet Brokenshire doubted that Crawford had a vendetta against Dr. Jekyll himself, rather than their two opposing beliefs and opinions. There had been a lot of theories for why Crawford would have wanted Jekyll out of the way, some including the simple fact that Jekyll was probably the only other man in all of London as popular and influential as him, some including their clashing opinions in important political and scientific questions, and yet, through their feud, it had seemed like their rivalry had been quite one-sided. Brokenshire and his team had spent the last two weeks researching both men and their rivalry and at this point, the Sergeant was quite sure that he could give a ten-page essay for each topic respectively. Crawford was about a decade older than Jekyll and had therefore been in the public eye much longer. He was a working aristocrat and a businessman, having funded many of London’s most successful businesses, spanning from medical supply companies to breweries to real estate, and it seemed like he had seen the rise of Dr. Jekyll’s career as a threat to his own. It was not a secret that most of London and the people of power in the city were-- or had been-- against science, so while Crawford had been on top of the food chain for years, the establishment and success of the Society seemed to have struck a nerve of some sort, especially so once Crawford’s allies began to support it. It seemed like Crawford had seen that as a type of betrayal, and had come to the “clever” solution of trying to shut the operation down immediately, and yet he had never managed. It seemed like no matter what Crawford threw at Jekyll, the doctor would catch it with a smile on his face, light it on fire and toss it in the trash. No matter what the aristocrat did, Brokenshire couldn’t find a single instance of Dr. Jekyll doing anything to actively harm Crawford, his image, or his businesses, despite everything the latter did to him.
He guessed it was just another instance of what a goodhearted man that Jekyll was, of course. Ask anyone on the street and they would all tell you what a great man the doctor was, and it always seemed like every single person in London had a story about how the scientist had personally helped them, their family, or their friends. The only ones that Brokenshire and his team had heart talking badly about him had, of course, been the few people still against the Society, and yet it had never really been about his character rather than the entire idea of the Society. Everyone knew the doctor was a kind, helpful man who just wished everyone well. Men of his stock were, sadly, few and far in between, and it saddened the Sergeant to know that people were willing to hurt such a good man like that. He could not figure out why someone would do such a thing-- sure, Jekyll had made mistakes, but who hadn’t? He doubted that the doctor could have done anything to anger someone to the point of them thinking the only logical solution was to hurt him, abduct him, murder him. Sure, there were probably people mad at Hyde who decided to take it out on Jekyll, but that made no sense at all. After all, Jekyll had been just as much of a victim of the fire and Hyde’s scheme as everyone else had been. Going after Hyde’s ex-employer after leading the Scotland Yard to the Blackfog Bazaar was absolutely absurd, yet a type of revenge that Brokenshire would not put past the many criminals that lurked in the London Underground.
Really, the reason why the offenders could have done it was completely unimportant. What was important was the fact that Dr. Henry Jekyll was gone, and they had to find both him and his kidnappers as soon as possible. Hell, Jekyll could be dying or very badly injured at this very moment! Who knew what kind of torture, what kind of sadistic treatment he was suffering through? Who knew if he was even alive still? Who knew if he even was in London at all? Who knew what kind of man he would be if he was found? For every day that passed, the probability that he would be found and found alive plummeted heavily, the odds and statistics were against them. They had to be quick, so very quick, and yet...
Brokenshire’s hands found the edge of his desk as he pushed his chair away quite abruptly, grunting as he got on his legs and turned his head away from all these godforsaken documents, feeling the clinically white paper blinding him in the dim light. He made a beeline towards one of the few windows in his office, quietly running a hand through his ginger locks as he peaked between the blinds, observing, watching, praying that his goddamn colleagues would come back soon. It was dark, yet it was brighter out there than it was in his office, giving him just enough light to be able to decipher anything going on outside. The streets were empty, the night was quiet... Goddamnit, where were they?
He sighed and shook his head, mostly to try to get rid of the slight paranoia and weariness that began to grip him. He moved away from the window, feeling how all the energy in his legs only got worse and worse for every second, and he almost could not stop himself as he began to pace around the office, trying to pass time and trying to distract himself as it only seemed like all his energy got worse and worse and worse for every second that passed. Jenkins and Wipple should have been here a long time ago. What could possibly have taken them so long? They didn’t have all night!
Brokenshire was an impatient man as it was, he knew that. He seldom had the patience to wait for something unimportant and he had particularly no patience for things that were important. The fact that Wipple and Jenkins had been sent out to collect documents, proof of possible evidence of Crawford’s involvement in Jekyll’s kidnapping that could either incriminate him or prove him innocent of the whole ordeal... Sure, they had his jewelry, but that was certainly not enough proof to arrest him just yet. They needed more... More proof of Crawford’s suspicious behavior, proof that he was not above kidnapping, proof that he was not a man to be trusted. Two weeks of research, two weeks of potentially wasted and precious time amounted to this. Two weeks of quietly investigating Crawford, sinking so much time and so many resources in a potential dead-end... They were hoping to find the evidence they needed to arrest Crawford, after all, they hoped that he was the criminal in all of this, the orchestrator to the entire kidnapping and especially since they had no other leads, but for that, they needed definite proof, proof that Jenkins and Wipple had been in charge of, and if they never showed up...
The Sergeant rubbed his sore eyes, regretfully feeling how the late-night weariness slowly began to get to him, slowly washing over his body like algae clinging to every surface, only seeming to become worse and worse and more and more in quantity the longer you didn’t pay attention. He had been working on this case non-stop for the last two weeks, having barely gotten any rest at all during that time, and yet it was much less because he couldn’t pawn the case off to someone else while he took his normal days off and got the rest he so desperately needed, it was much less the work piling up and being forced upon him because there was no one else to take the case, no, it was mostly the fact that he wanted to get to the bottom of this as fast as possible, and he wanted to be the one in charge of such an important case. He trusted his colleagues with his life and yet he only trusted himself with the Henry Jekyll case, even if he wasn’t fully sure why. Everyone was worried, of course, so he had no doubt that the other officers would be just as precise and active with the case as he currently was, but... Yeah. Jekyll was a beloved man, a man who was friends with practically everyone-- the commissioner specifically, but Brokenshire could not deny that he had taken a liking to that man, as much as he regretted admitting it. He knew the cautionary tale of scientists who went mad with hubris, narcissism, and... Well, madness all too well. He knew the tale of the bright young men and women who wanted to test the limits of every aspect of the world they lived in, who wanted to understand how things worked and wanted to manipulate it into their own liking, who only got hungry for more and more until they went insane and could find themselves in the Asylums all of them seemed to fear so, or until they found themselves exiled and on the run from the law. After all, Brokenshire had known Moreau once upon an eternity ago; he had been just as respectable of a gentleman as Jekyll was, then Moreau had shown his true colors, got exiled, and now he spent the last of his days stuck in a padded cell under solitary confinement and burnt to a crisp in Bethlam Royal Asylum. He knew that there seldom were scientists who did not go mad in their own way-- everyone knew the story of Frankenstein, even if she did seem... Relatively sane now, she had still caused catastrophic damage to the people around her, innocent people specifically, and Moreau was already mentioned... The odds that Jekyll and his Society, too, were just as mad as the rest of the scientists that had made and snuck their way into the history books were far too high. Respectable facades and silver-tongued speech were all they needed to trick practically everyone, both of which Henry Jekyll undoubtedly had. Impulsive, uncontrollable, testing the limits of reality while claiming that it was for the betterment of society, humanity as a whole. It was a tale Brokenshire knew all too well and yet Jekyll had done a good job of pushing himself away from any and all possibilities that he was like those scientists. They were rogue scientists, he would say, not mad scientists.
Oh, it was a speech that the sergeant had heard a handful of times already, yet it was almost endearing, and quite charming after a while. He guessed that was just the effect the doctor had on the people around him. He was a charming man and no one could deny that. He had all of London wrapped around his pinkie, spun and held together with the silken thread he had woven with his silver-tongue, and that had been quite obvious, and it still was. After all, people had been outraged over his disappearance, and they could still hear the people of London making a ruckus and demanding that they find the doctor they all loved so much. Many of Jekyll’s friends had offered to put up rewards for whoever could come forward with any possible statements or for whoever could find the doctor, and with many, he meant many; Dr. Robert Lanyon, Sr. Lanyon, Sir. Danvers Carew, the commissioner himself, and of course the entire Society, and that was only to name a few, so there was quite a large sum of money at play now. So much money was at stake and yet they still had heard nothing related to the Henry Jekyll case. No one had seen suspicious activity, no one had any clue what possibly could have caused it... You might as well have thought he disappeared in thin air just because someone wished him gone, for no reason whatsoever. You might as well have thought the doctor never existed.
The only real ‘evidence’ and the only real statements they had about the case came from their investigation of Crawford. They had dipped their noses in practically every part of Crawford’s life, investigating and interrogating every servant, worker, acquaintance, business partner, and rival with a connection to the man in question, their statements now placed upon the sergeant’s desk, neatly waiting for when they would be of use. All they needed was Jenkins and Wipple with the rest of the accounts and statements, and hopefully they would bring the long-awaited truth. They all had theories, of course, both personal and more... Hmm, official ones, so to speak, all of which suggested that the kidnapping of Henry Jekyll was not the only crime that Crawford may be involved in, many of which seemed to be about tax evasion, blackmail... The classic stuff that men of his stock often dipped into sooner or later. Now, if Jenkins and Wipple could just come back...
Knockknockknock--
Speaking of the devil, Brokenshire couldn’t help but let out a relieved breath he hadn’t known he had been holding as he finally stopped his pace. His attention immediately shifted towards his door, and it only took a moment before he saw the door handle moving, and then through the darkness, Brokenshire finally-- finally!-- saw his dear colleagues entering, the expected documents in hand.
“Oi, sergeant, why are you cooping up in the darkness?”
As Jenkins moved forward with the documents, Wipple stayed behind to close the door behind them, taking the opportunity to also turn on the light, which, in its turn, successfully blinded the poor sergeant whose eyes had gotten so accustomed to the soft, simple light from the candle on his desk. He did not get a lot of time to adjust to it, however, as Jenkins soon placed the new documents down on the little empty space on the sergeant’s desk that had not been occupied with paperwork and, instead, occupied it with more documents. Brokenshire watched the papers, then his gaze turned to Jenkins, who looked less than proud of the work they presented. His thin lips and mustache curled into a frown, the disappointment in his sigh seemed to echo through the room.
“You are not going to believe this, sir.”
“Well, what is it? Did you find anything?”
“Well... You are not going to like it.”
The three of them surrounded the desk, waddling together so everyone could have a good view of the newly added documents. Brokenshire eyed it up and down with great interest, if not suspicion and caution, yet he was quick to look back up at Jenkins, quietly gesturing for him to continue to explain.
“Crawford has been actively against the Society, as we knew, but his way of sabotaging, as we theorized, is nowhere near illegal.” Jenkins filtered through the documents until he got a specific page, tapping it with his finger against the headlines, and them moving the tip of his finger down to the summary, “According to his bank statements, the only money that has been taken out and put into anything remotely against science as been into perfectly legal campaigns, some of just so happens to affect the Society, would the things they push for actually go through. Other than that... The only proof we have is the jewelry found on the scene. Sure, yeah, it’s clear proof but it’s nothing we can arrest or accuse him with. It’s practically impossible for the jewelry to have found its way into the office...”
Brokenshire might as well have thought he got a door slammed into his face.
Their main suspect turned out to be a dead end. All the work, all the time, and all the funds they had put into investigating Crawford turned into a dead-end, and now they came up empty-handed without a new suspect.
But... That didn’t explain why his jewelry was in Jekyll’s workspace.
“Well... Do either of you have any idea why the ring and necklace were in the office otherwise?”
Wipple and Jenkins stayed silent, glancing at each other for a short second, yet they quickly looked back at Brokenshire and seemed to struggle to come up with a logical answer to such a question. So many things could have made the jewelry appear where they did, yet none of them actually seemed as logical as... Well, the theory that Crawford paid some thugs to get Dr. Jekyll out of the game, although having paid them with jewelry-- specifically name engraved jewelry-- was certainly not the most logical option, either. The thought that Dr. Jekyll might have stolen the trinkets didn’t even cross their minds, the thought that Dr. Jekyll might have planted them there seemed too absurd for any of them to even consider it, the thought of Dr. Jekyll having faked the entire thing would probably be the dumbest thing either of them would have thought in years. Dr. Jekyll was gone, he was kidnapped, there had been blood everywhere in the office and the blood might have dried into the wood at this point. Red crimson that coagulated and stained into the mahogany wood was a reminder of what Jekyll, in this very moment, might be suffering through, a reminder that if they weren’t quick, Jekyll’s blood might not have only stained his office.
But... Hold on...
“What if it wasn’t Crawford who planted them there?” Jenkins suddenly spoke up, you could practically see the lightbulb shining over his head as the idea struck him. Both Wipple and Brokenshire furrowed their eyebrows, looking at their colleague.
“Well... Obviously. It isn’t like someone-- if Crawford did hire criminals, would have put them there intentionally. Crawford would clearly not have done the dirty work himself.” Brokenshire pressed.
“No, no-- What if someone tried to frame him?” Jenkins continued, “Think about it-- Crawford is a high standing man, he has a lot of enemies, someone might have stolen the jewelry and planted it on the scene when they kidnapped Jekyll, to throw us off of their tracks?”
The officers all went silent for a moment, as Jenkin’s words and his theory began to sink in. It only took a moment, and then Wipple gasped, almost with excitement. He grabbed Jenkins’ arm and stared at him in awe, before immediately giving him a quick pat on the back.
“Jenkins! You might actually be onto something!”
Jenkins grinned proudly, preening under the praises before the two constables turned towards the sergeant for his input. Brokenshire continued to stare down at the documents, eyebrows knitted into a deep, deep frown upon his forehead. Jenkins’ and Wipple’s excited grins slowly washed away as they watched their friend, a bit confused, a bit worried, as the sergeant reached up a hand to scratch his beard in thought.
“That... Complicates things.”
Brokenshire straightened himself, placing his arms behind his back as his frown only seemed to deepen by the second, yet his eyes did not leave the documents. If someone had kidnapped Jekyll and tried to frame Crawford for it... This might be a much more complicated situation than they had anticipated. This must be a gang activity, or someone who was very dumb for using two pieces of jewelry and nothing more. He could not deny that the idea seemed plausible-- it actually sounded quite reasonable and logical, But how did the criminals get their hands on the trinkets? Could the Scotland Yard afford to finally go and confront Crawford about it, if he knew that his things had recently gotten stolen?
Well... It wasn’t like they had anything to go on, otherwise.
“Gentlemen... I think it’s time that we go to the source, eh?”
“Source?”
“We have to interrogate Crawford. Perhaps he can point us to the reason for why his stuff was in Jekyll’s office.”
Wipple and Jenkins looked at each other, and yet they both immediately turned back to the sergeant.
“Well... What are we waiting for, then?”
The three of them looked at each other for a short moment, only allowing a second of hesitation before all three of them practically sprinted to the door, tearing it open and practically running down the corridors, immediately jumping into the police carriage that was stationed outside and then they were off, galloping through the city streets, off to an unsuspecting Richard Crawford. They had no time to waste, perhaps that’s why they all decided that they had to rush, perhaps that’s why they decided to be quick, or maybe it was the excitement of finally having another lead-- another lead that actually made sense and could be true. In just a few hours they might have their truth. In just a few hours they might find the culprits. In just a few hours, they could all just hope that they would find out what happened to the beloved Dr. Henry Jekyll.
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This chapter was originally going to be Thomas going home from the... Ahem, “hook up” with Robert and meeting Emma Carew and flirting a bit with her, but that plan was only in the drafts and I never wrote it so it’s not what I originally had planned and mentioned in the notes above, but I’m weak for Emma and also Emma X Henry so I hope I will be able to write something for them when this fic is over <3
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Taglist: @artzycreature @jekkiefan
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#tgs#the glass scientists#tgs fanfic#tgs fanfiction#the glass scientists fanfic#the glass scientists fanfiction#banshees fanfic#banshees writing#tgs brokenshire#tgs sergeant brokenshire#tgs sergeant enoch brokenshire#the glass scientists brokenshire#the glass scientists sergeant brokenshire#the glass scientists sergeant enoch brokenshire
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The Epilogue:
Roman and Virgil:
They never did get married, because they didn’t want to. Virgil believes it to be a british social construct to control women and the lower class, and Roman believes marriage to be bad luck.
They did get into that huge funky war that we were talking about, and had to put Babe with Protection. After weeks of convincing, Valentine, Mac-Kenzie, and Junius fought by Virgil and Roman’s side, and they won after 5 years of fighting.
Virgil fulfilled his lifelong dream of making Bonner regret his words, and plunged his mother’s dagger into his chest. Something about Bonner that Virgil never mentioned was the fact that the man often shared the same words as his former husband, so perhaps that fueled his anger. After a lot of crying, Virgil came to the conclusion that maybe he’d leave the fighting to Angie, and hire a royal therapist.
There was more to Virgil’s story than that though, he did raise Babe with his beloved partner, Roman, after the war. He made an excellent father. Anne even came back and apologized, earning her role back into Virgil’s and his son’s life. He even got to see his nephews more often.
Seeing that his son is now only 12 years away from being a full fledged adult (to him that isn’t very long), Virgil now has to see that Babe is very different from other children. Honestly, he never thought his own very very dead mother would be assisting in the parenting of his child, but hey, Virgil has to remember that he isn’t always right, even if he can see the future.
Meanwhile Roman pursued his love for music and theatre, he even opened a music program for Oteriphanne, showing the lovely folks the beauty of music that isn’t just only about killing the French and Brits in order to stop deculturalization of their land (though that’s not a bad topic, Roman literally just wanted 14th century vampires to enjoy Spice Girls and it worked).
He obviously, but admittedly very awkwardly, learned how to parent a child. Roman wasn’t as picture perfect as he would’ve liked to be, he did after all accidentally make his son cry many times. Like Virgil, he now sees that their kid is different. His son’s ears are full of words that he can’t understand, but hopes to try his best to ease Babe’s worries and hardships in life.
Through five years of virgous studying, Roman became a quarter fluent in Pterannan. With even more studying and training, he finally became a fully trained Knight and earned his spot next to Virgil with his forementioned music program (turns out teaching a population several new skills, means he bettered the population which is a requirement to become a king when you're not blood related to royalty).
Still there’s somethings that Roman still regrets, he never did come to an understanding with his stepfather, who was his namesake. Nor does he see Remus and his husband as often as he wishes he did. And he kinda wants to buy a cow.
Even after being together for almost 10 years, they still love each other, and yes, Virgil still calls a phone, a magic box because some things never change.
Patton:
After he and Logan adopted the children from the Dragonwitch au that they accidently orphaned, Patton certainly was trying his best to keep going, and he did a pretty alright job.
Patton single handedly traveled across the country from Florida to Indiana with four small children whose identities he had to hide along his.
Once he had made it to the David-Dase residence, he explained what had happened and asked for help, and here’s what happened.
Nicholas and James owned property in rural Saskatchewan, which they had inherited from Jane Phoebe David (James’ deceased mother) and never really knew what to do with it. So in order to keep their son’s husband and their new grandchildren safe, James and Nicholas let Patton and their grandchildren live there. It was a good spot for them, it kept the reporters away from Patton and kept people away from Daniel, Jane, Harper and Buddy.
After receiving help from James and Nicholas, Patton had to figure out how to explain his disappearance to the police so that he could gain some form of normality, and a good enough job to support his growing family.
Stuff didn’t exactly go well at first. Still grieving over his separation from Logan, he did often find it hard to smile for his children, nor did he find it easy to explain to them that they couldn’t out in public without being hidden from the world’s view. It didn’t help when his O’Pa (Janus Van Den Bosch-Brzozowski) passed away from a deteriorating body, it was for the best, but it hurt to lose another parent.
He kept going though. His brother, Patton Reyes-Baker, moved in with him and got a job helping a local beekeeper. It wasn’t so bad, grief can strengthen some bonds. His step father, Remus, visited every so often, it was clear that he probably wouldn’t be around much longer either.
He’s doing a pretty good job raising those kids. Still it doesn’t help that Patton wishes he did it with his beloved. There have been many long nights of waiting and crying. There’s a good chance that Patton won’t move on until old age, which could be a good thing for a certain someone. Overall, if he were to describe it, it’s like the worst nightmare and the best dream ever at the same time.
Patton did get to open that diner, he did get to take his puppies home with him, and he did teach his kids how to ride bikes (except Buddy), but it still wasn’t the same. For all he cares, he’s still a married man.
Hymnthian:
Being one of the oldest motherfuckers ever, Hymnthian is still kicking it. Under Virgil and Roman’s rule, he’s pretty happy. He does find some common ground with his great (times a couple hundreds) grandchild though. Babe’s remarkable ability to hear the dead often comes in handy for a grieving widower. In return for hearing what his dead wife has to say, he teaches Babe how to play To-Ouch, an Oterian instrument.
Janus and Remus:
As you might've heard earlier, Janus passed away. It’s important to remember that death is an important part of life. In Janus’ case, they were fine with it. After an aspiring career as a ballerina and potter, not being able to use your hands or foot can often be depressing. When their body finally gave out, Janus figured it best if their sister took their place. Janus died comfortably and happily. What else can I say that will convince you? Death isn’t always a bad thing.
Remus O’Malley-Gator was a different story. After the death of Janus, he found himself once again lost. He visited Patton, Patton, and his step-grandkids every so often. Remus spent most of time adventuring, looking for some kind of fulfillment. I suppose that sounds bad, but I always write a bittersweet ending.
Camila and Lotte:
After spending most of her adult life in the void, Camila was beginning to feel hopeless. Her sons were already grown and had found their soulmates, while she had still had nothing. Camila wandered for a while, universe after universe, she turned up with nothing once again.
With Janus having passed, their replacement would soon have to come in. And well, she was certainly surprised. Camila had no idea Janus had a younger sister! Lotte had been frozen for over 200 years, and arrived fresh from the fridge at the ripe old age of 48.
Camila had her fair share of trying to tell this beautiful, intelligent, strong woman that she was from a soulmate universe and that Lotte was her long awaited soulmate. Let’s just say, it took her a couple years.
Lotte had her share of pining as well. I mean, Camila is an equally beautiful, intelligent, strong woman who was tall (every short lesbian’s weakness).
She found her footing as her sibling’s replacement eventually, while she didn’t wield a shepherd's crook but having arms of pure steel sure did come handy when dealing with the dangers of the void.
Eventually, you know that their had to be an equally cute lesbian void wedding, where Patton and Roman became cousins, so that’s cool.
Logan:
As the only void dweller that actually only lives in the void, his life, honestly, sucks.
As the years go by, Logan’s hair only gets grayer and his yearning only grows stronger. He builds his tough exterior up once more, with some dull hope still intact. Logan knows the probability of never seeing his husband and kids again, and lets the gnawing feeling eat away at him.
But you know what? He did get to be cool Uncle Logan (his Ultra Secret Oterian Code Name was Protection) for about five years. He loved the shit out of Babe, even taught that boy some french and how to clear his mind even when people’s thoughts are louder than all shit.
Then he had to give Babe back to Virgil and Roman, knowing he should take the offer to live in Oteriphanne, he did.
Nothing became of it, he’s just a guy in a country full of vampires. There’s nothing there for him after all. Logan knows Babe isn’t his to parent, and chooses to keep his distance so he doesn’t crowd Roman and Virgil. Maybe in a few years, he’ll risk his life. For now, he’ll just become a grizzled middle aged man.
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