sheeeessssss imongeens favoriteeeeee and he is goooing to see his family agaaaaainnnn and she knooowsss it has beeeeen a hell of a ruuuuun and im cryiiiiiiing lalalala

starting off with an amuse-bouche of some of my initial favorite bits! y'all, this update was WILD.

it will truly never not be funny the extent to which astarion Does Not Plan.

we're going to seize power from the absolute's cult! how? well... they'll cross that bridge when they get there. a solution will probably become obvious eventually, right? whatever, who cares about the details.

we're going to kill cazador! how? aha, he's thought about this; he's going to collect information! and how is he going to do that and make sure he gets all of the information he needs? well....... they'll probably find things out by asking around, right? that part isn't as important, don't worry about it.

even with the bite -- buddy. pal. what were you planning to do if you had successfully bitten a party member without anyone noticing. when they wake up the next morning, they're going to notice the bite marks and how sluggish they feel.

astarion can think one step ahead max and that's where the ball stops rolling.

❌ Ned Fulmer was fired for cheating

✔️ Ned Fulmer was fired for tarnishing his own brand, and becoming a liability to the company.

Shout out to people who are fans and enjoyers of hated media. Stuff people make 8 hour video essays on why it’s bad, shows or games or whatever that people dunk on to the point where it’s basically a trend even if they never interacted with said media. Bands or movies where people who have only heard of it will make judgement after hearing someone talk about their interest.

Keep being you, keep liking what you like authentically. Don’t let the bandwagoning or angry nerds get to you. You are some of the most awesome and chilliest people on the internet.

Penny stardewvalley makes me so sad because she's SO sensitive to, like, basically everything you tell her (telling her that you can't stand children while two children are nearby is a pretty lousy move but -1500 friendship?? being a jerk to other characters' faces typically loses you about 50 points, and if you choose the option labeled "creepy" and ask Leah for a kiss in her 2 heart event she physically hits you and kicks you out of her house but that's only -100 friendship…) and so if you want to befriend her it's a whole lot of lying and tiptoeing around her feelings (2 hearts: George was right but saying that makes her feel bad. 6 hearts: her food sucks but even if you try to be polite about it she feels like a failure; only a bald-faced lie pleases her. 8 hearts: saying you don't want to be tied down with a family loses you a little bit of friendship and she's only happy if you say you want kids) and I can't help but think she's a product of her environment. She lives in a trailer with only her mother, who gets drunk every night and has something of a temper. Penny's like a skittish rescue animal who won’t even come out from hiding under something unless you leave her lots of treats

Just as a reminder to those hyped about side order, this is Nintendo’s official opinion of Agent 4 from the Splatoon website:

Look at her face. Does she look like a pushover? Someone who is just a little wacky? No. This is a teenager who fought an entire Empire. And *won*. People I know keep saying she’s not as impressive as Three or Eight and like?? Just because she did the same thing as Three makes it no less impressive you ding dongs. In fact, she did it with less help than Three had, AND kicked Octavio to the curb WHILE HE HAD CALLIE ON HIS SIDE. She’s practically a force of nature. And it’s not like the Splatoon devs to forget something like this.

No matter what your hopes for side order are, don’t expect Four to be some damsel in distress or anything similar. Remember what the contents of the Splatoon 2 campaign were. Remember that Four is not a member of the New Squidbeak Splatoon because “someone has to be Agent 4!!!” Because I can almost guarantee the devs haven’t forgotten. I say with complete confidence that their definition of Four being “pushover” is a red herring. She’s going to kick our ass on February 22nd.

Get ready.

GUYS . i need 5 more business days to recover

my girl .. wtf are they doing ☹️☹️

girlbossing too close to the sun.

The parts of you that support me

My husband just cheated on me IN FRONT OF MY EYES with one of MY FAVORITE FOLLOWERS

well, I can't say I expected the new chapter to feature Idia (metaphorically) going to (metaphorical) hell, getting a pep talk from his (metaphorical) Phantom brother which helps him finally move on once and for all from his brother's death, and (metaphorically) overblotting again to fight his way back out of (metaphorical) hell, only to have his darkest fear (non-metaphorically) come true when his mom goes through his computer and finds all his secret files. but I am glad it did!

also this is all a flashback for the purpose of explaining to our group what the heck is going on (whether or not any of it is getting through is another matter)

What I find so funny is that in receiving small glimpses of episodes I haven’t seen, I fully assumed that Kipperlilly Copperkettle was some type of dog-based humanoid? But no, that was Kristen just roasting her to FLITH upon meeting her

"How many girls go to this school, again?" "Oh my god, and again, they're all sixes at best."

PJ in Bottoms (2023)

y'know when the guys are like girls yknow?