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#im venting but it really does fuck you up when youre raised as a child with this mindset
curioscurio · 1 year
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being raised american baptist until high school will fuck you up so bad.
it teaches you that you are, by nature, inherently an evil creature constantly sinning and committing shameful acts just for existing. you dont deserve love or relief or happiness or joy because you are just that horrible for existing. that you can never be Enough to make up for the sin of being born.
:) but dont worry! Some Guy died a horrible death so that your pathetic self is allowed the privileges of living. :) * hope you like Some Guy because now he's the most important person in your life btw.
*ONLY if you follow our special book of make believe rules and try your hardest to indoctrinate other people into this lifestyle
then MAYBE God will think you've scraped up enough Good Boy Points to escape the innumerable forms of painful and grotesque Eternal Torture in the afterlife (that you deserve btw.)
also your non-believer friends and your pets are going to hell (which is a real place) no matter what. they tell you all this when you're 5 using puppets
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1990jeevas · 3 years
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I love it when people talk about things they're passionate about, tell me something cool!! Anything you want, just something you find interesting or want to talk about :D
hello anon my beloved, I am in a bad mood so you will be receiving a passionate, yet lowkey of pissy rant about why villainizing bakugou makes me wanna vomit and its NOT just because I'm a dumbass kinnie :)
tws: child abuse (emotional and physical), near death expierences, bullying, kidnapping, suffocation, lots of trauma in general tbh. if you've seen bnha then basically just keep all the general triggering plot stuff in mind incase i missed any warnings
also, note: I havent caught up on bnha in a minute, I'm at like the start of the war arc but I barely remember shit there tbh so like. probs missing new stuff. also bnha spoiler warnings lol
so, for starters, the homie bakugou has like,, a good handful of issues that come from his childhood that explain why he's an ass. he was always praised and never actually reprimanded for being a twat which led to him having a huge ego that ended up fucking him over majorly. this ego was something that his mother acknowledged him having, but literally didnt try to fix it with anything other than violence. see here:
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like, instead of trying to help him, she hits and insults him, which is probably what led to his weird inferiority/superiority complex. being constantly told by others that you're outstanding and one day you'll be a top hero because you're rude and aggressive and then going home and being hit by your mother for those exact same behaviors is bound to fucking confuse a child.
so like, now that we've established that its definetly canon that his mother (parents? I think he said parents at some point but masaru doesn't seem like the type so 🤷) hits him though we don't know how much or how often (though if bakugou was as much of a little shit back then ((which as far as we've seen- he was)) then it was probably often), lets talk about how regardless of all that 1) hitting your kids as "discipline" not only doesn't work but is abusive lol like idc if it's spanking/popping them on the mouth for talking shit, slapping them across the face "on occasion", etc. shits not okay 2) hitting your kids!!!! does not work!!!!!!!! it is literally PROVEN not to work!!!!!!!! hitting a child who has done something wrong doesnt teach them to stop doing something it teaches them to be scared of you, which will cause the child to withdraw, removing part of their support system (assuming said abusive parents would even offer that up) and will most likely lead to them thinking they're a bad person, not that their actions were bad, which are two different things. so, ya know, that would clearly have an effect on a kid. like, as someone with a mother who reminds me all too much of mitsuki: I have acted like a complete shitbag and taken my anger out on people to feel better in the past because of the way my mother treated me. though it was nowhere near what bakugou did, I still know first fucking hand what a mother hitting and insulting her child will do, especially if they have no proper outlet for that (friends, a safe place to vent) which bakugou never fucking had.
theres also the fact that just talking to your kid the way mitsuki does (saying it's his fault he was kidnapped because he's weak, all while hitting him) is not??? okay?????? ive seen people arguing that this was just a joke in poor taste but like her son was KIDNAPPED and even if it was a "joke" there's literally NO WAY that would EVER?? BE FUNNY??????? she just sounds like the kind of parent who at the very least says shit without thinking that would traumatize bakugou (because being told right after being kidnapped it's your fucking fault by your mother is absolutely traumatizing) but it comes across as her being emotionally abusive.
mitsukis character as a whole comes across as a shitty mom who doesn't realize she's a shitty mom and thinks bakugou being an ass isn't at least partially her fault even though she's admitted to realizing he has always had an ego problem and doing nothing to fix it except for hitting and yelling which obviously did nothing but make him just as loud and violent as she is.
this is obviously not the entire reason why he's a dick but he was never properly taught that the shit he was doing wasn't okay and people not stopping it and/or praising him endlessly even tho he was a bully is basically the same as encouraging it, thank you very much.
moving on from that, let's talk about bakugous other traumas and how he naturally responds to them. hint: it's with either full blown panic or a fight response (verbal or physical, though usually physical. also sometimes it's the panic followed by the fight response.)
so far in bnha (keep in mind that I am not caught up, I've only read up to the beginning of the war arc and i barely remember those bits so) bakugou has...
nearly died via sludge villain (he was unable to move and was being suffocated to death- keep this in mind)
lost for the first time ever and against deku of all people (this nearly sent him into a full blown panic attack, likely because of that sexy little inferiority/superiority complex combo. think of this as like. gifted kid burnout lite. he has always been the best of the best and now suddenly he is being beaten by somebody who has always been weaker than him, which immediately makes him start thinking he was never actually that good, he's actually a fucking failure, a goddamn fraud)
won the sports festival by default (bakugou counts this as yet another failure because todoroki didnt try his best. had bakugou lost to todoroki full strength, he would've taken 2nd place with a bit of bitching, but he still wouldve taken it rather than refuse the medal as it would be a reminder that he failed. instead of accepting that like UA shouldve, the staff chained and muzzled him on live television and then had all might, his fucking idol, force the medal into his mouth. remember the sludge villain incident and how he couldnt move and was suffocating to death? yeah.)
been kidnapped because of the way he reacted to winning during the sports festival (he was aggressive and tried to refuse the medal because he felt he didnt deserve it and was then retraumatized by being chained up and muzzled. his "villainous attitude" was a fucking trauma response, do not tell me otherwise)
was then chained up once again by the LOV after being kidnapped,,, do we see the "retraumatize bkg" theme yet?
"ended all might" (he literally blames himself for all mights retirement because had he just not have been weak, all might wouldve had more time, right?)
my point with all of these is that bakugou has been severely traumatized and has then had his trauma responses (aggression, fight) used to further demonize him. not all people with trauma react the fucking same and the way the fandom just refuses to acknowledge anger as a valid form of trauma response is gross as hell.
moving away from that topic, bakugou has literally never had any actual friends, they all just used him and didn't care about him which absolutely will fuck up a kid, especially one who already has all that other shit going on. bakugou deadass never had a support system or people to help him grow as a person, let alone properly work through his fucking emotions so it's not surprising that he would take out his bullshit on the one person who tried to help him especially considering he saw dekus actions as him thinking he was weak. bakugou was raised to not seek help, he thought somebody strong shouldnt ever need it, so for somebody like deku (who bakugou percieved as weak and helpless already) to offer up help? deku must obviously think bakugou is even weaker than him, what other explanation could their possibly be!
speaking of which, there's his heaps of insecurities that he basically hid by being a twat and bullying others for most of his life. kid was so insecure he bullied deku for fucking years cause he thought deku looked down on him, thought he was better than him, etc. and that only got worse bc his idol then decided to take deku in, train him and even give him his quirk. there's probably some shit im missing but still he's got issues and always has had issues. that being said, he's actually improving and working them out now which is what makes him a really good, interesting character. it's also nice to see a character who is a dick without some tragic backstory (like his backstory is sad but its not the classic "my family was fucking slaughtered and i turned into a raging bitch who murders people" type shit) bc that rarely happens and it's like most assholes don't actually have a story like that they're just assholes lol
now lets talk improvement! lil bitch has been getting better since he got into UA and im so happy abt it!! he had a rough start what with deku suddenly having a quirk and all but like he is really improving now and it highkey shows that bakugou just mostly needed people who 1) didn't constantly praise him and actually criticized him instead 2) actually fucking punished him doing stupid shit and 3) some motherfucking friends
Since going to UA he's gotten actually feedback from teachers about his weaknesses and how to get stronger, he's lost against others, hes been told he has a shit attitude and is a dick, told he should be nicer and leave deku alone, etc etc. He hasn't gotten in trouble too much with teachers but others give him shit for what he does and aizawa has punished him too, while still acknowledging that bakugou is an amazing and dedicated student, something which no one else had done up til that point. and uh???? homie actually has friends who like,,, don't use him and also call him out when he's a dick. like specifically kirishima has done this shit and him and bakugous relationship is clearly very healthy and beneficial for the both of them. makes me feel all happy n shit, ya know
bottom line is: while it is absolutely valid to dislike or even hate bakugou because he is a massively flawed person who has been very cruel to others, villainizing him for the way he acts which in large part seems to be from a lack of guidance, a shitty mother and heavy amounts of trauma, is fucking awful. his actions cannot be fucking excused, he needs to apologize and continue to grow, but he is also a fucking teenager, who is just now being told that the way he acts is unacceptable by people who dont fucking abuse him (and I swear to god if any people who think mitsuki isnt abusive interact with this fucking post I will fullstop hardblock you, I do not fucking care) and actually treat him like a normal person instead of some prodigy child or someone who needs to be fixed.
people are free to debate my points or whatever bc I know some of this stuff is up to interpretation but like. dni if you're just here to say you hate bakugou for xyz reason or that he's irredeemable. also especially dni if you compare him to fucking endeavor yall bitches make me gag.
anyways thxs for the ask anon <33 sorry this is a kinda messy info dump lol
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one-abuse-survivor · 3 years
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hey so, i just need to vent, im so sorry if this gets long. I've (20) been raising my brother (6) because my mom is narcissistic, neglectful and aggressive. We still live with her and she provides us with basic stuff like food, but other than that its us for us. We get along pretty well and almost never fight, but this year I've lost my temper twice when he was throwing tantrums. I know its not his fault and I really try to be patient but he has very strong opinions about everything and he's very stubborn. I've never hurt him for real like she did with me, I just held his arm a little hard and shouted but afterwards I just feel so bad. He cried and I felt like I'm traumatizing him the same way she did with me and he's gonna grow up all kinds of fucked up like I did. The two times I stopped and started apologizing and tried to talk through the situation again. But now I feel worse, like I'm gaslighting him, like I'm a wolf in sheep clothes. Sometimes my mom will hit me and then buy me presents and this feels like maybe I'm just like her. I dont want to be. I want him to feel safe and trust me. I want to be different, I want to do better and I'm trying I really am but I have work, college and now the pandemic, my mom keeps treating me badly or just ignoring me (which is worse somehow) and then there's my brother and everything that goes into raising a child. I dont know how to do it all and its so much pressure
Here's a link to an ask similar to yours I got a while ago, in case it might help to know you're not alone in these experiences.
That does sound like a huge amount of pressure that's been put on you, nonnie, and I really, really hope you know that it's not your responsibility to be the parent that your brother needs—that's your mom's job, since she chose to have him, and the fact she's neglecting and abusing you both doesn't automatically mean you should be mature or responsible enough to raise a child you never chose to raise. I really hope you understand that any trauma he might develop is entirely on your mom, and not on you. You yourself are still growing, still finding your place in this world, and still going through trauma, and she's the one abusing and traumatising both of you instead of raising you and taking care of you. She's the one who put you and your brother in a situation you should never have had to be in. She's the one who left him (and you) without a caring and mature parent.
No one should expect you to be able to do a perfect job with your brother, and it wouldn't be fair for you to expect that of yourself. You're not meant to know how to be a good parent, or to have to worry about being one.
But with that being said, apologising and trying to talk things through after you hurt someone is not the same as pretending it never happened to gaslight/manipulate a victim after abusing them. We all mess up! We've all lost our temper at some point. It's okay. You're not evil for that. You're not like your abuser for that. What you have to do is what you already do—apologise, explain that you felt frustrated but that it still wasn't okay to do what you did, talk it through with him, and let him express himself if he wants to. Don't tell him he's responsible for your actions and don't shame or guilt him for having negative emotions about you in the moment. That's all it takes to hold yourself accountable.
I'm sending a big virtual hug your way ❤️ you're doing your best in a situation you shouldn't have to be in in the first place, and I want you to know I'm proud of you. I hope you're compassionate with yourself when you mess up, and I hope you know you're nothing like your mom.
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dinolikes · 4 years
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IMPOSTER- PART TWO
summery ❤︎ Nobody has any quirks and are stuck on a ship like among us
pairings ❤︎ Imposter!Dabi x Reader
content warnings ❤︎ major character death
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you sobbed into dabi's chest as hawks and ingeniumu covered thirteens body with a sheet, everyone looking over, some with tears, and some with just a blank look, like they were still processing it.
it was silent for a long time before ingeniumu cleared his throat and looked up, everyone seeing the ghost of tears in his eyes, "we have to call h-headquarters," his voice cracked but he stood tall, he would make a great captain one day, even with his pushover attitude.
you were crowded in the cafeteria, a computer resting on the table with headquarters on the line.
"im sorry to say this but you have an imposter."
you shook your head, you refused to believe it, how could these people, your FRIENDS, who you've lived with for a year, how could they be imposters?
though you shouldnt be surprised, the league has been gaining members, rarely any ship didnt have at least ONE imposter, some even having as much as three, you just thought you guys were the exception.
"twice, hawks, you searched thirteens body correct?" a voice came through the screen.
"yes sir," hawks quietly muttered.
"was everything in place?"
"he didnt have the vent key."
the vent key, really easy to pass through, was originally made for people to quickly go from room to rooms, but after the rise of imposters who started using it to sneak up on people, only one person was allowed to use it per day.
the voice cursed, "very well." a sigh could be heard, "well you know the drill," you did, you just didnt like it, "if you suspect someone, send them out and let them die," you gulped.
you didnt know if you could do that, even knowing that someone here murdered thirteen, you learned to care for each of them, even weirdo itchy snatch tomura. you didnt know if you could just send them into space to suffocate. even the thought made you sick.
"until then, we'll need you to finish your tasks fast, we'll have you home by the end of the day, which means the imposter will probably try to kill faster today. watch out." with that a beep was heard, signaling that you were disconnected.
a grim silence filled the room.
hawks finally spoke up, "which one of you assholes did it?"
dabi glared at the taller man, "fuck you dude, how do we know you didnt do it?"
hawks took a step closer, "bold accusations from someone who seems to hate everyone!"
"why would I kill one of the only people I actually like in this shithole?"
"because he had the vent key dumbass!"
"hey!" twice yelled.
hawks glowered at him, "oh yeah, how could we forget twice here? you found the body right? meaning you were the last one to see him? why DID you decide to check on him huh?"
"why would I come to you guys then?!"
"i dunno, to throw off suspicion maybe?"
you finally snapped "stop it!" everyone's heads shot towards you, "thirteen is dead," you choked out, "and I know thay we're all upset but we just have to finish today's tasks and then we're back home, okay?"
everyone stared, until deku started nodding, "y-yeah! just today's tasks left! then we'll go home and catch the imposter and we'll be fine!"
"what makes you so sure we'll catch him once we get home idiot?"
deku stared up confusingly at kaachan, "dont we have cameras?"
ingeniumu looked at his friend "obviously deku but whatre you getting at?"
"our cameras have memory sticks," shoto spoke up quietly, "when they're connected into one of headquarters machines, you can access all of what it caught,"
deku nodded rapidly, "exactly!"
your eyes lit up, "deku your a genius!" you grabbed his head and gave him a big smooch on the forehead, leaving him a red and stuttering mess.
dabi tsk'ed, "c'mere,' he grabbed you hand and pulled you towards him, wrapping you hands around you and resting his head on your shoulder.
you rolled your eyes playfully at his jealous nature.
"fine. we finish our task but if another person is found dead we're booting someone off." with that, hawks stormed off.
you tried not to go too harsh on him, you knew hawks looked up to thirteen, and beneath that cocky demeanor, he really was soft.
knowing that though, you couldnt help but feel some fear and resentment.
fear because you didnt think you could kill off one of your own and resentment because you knew hawks would make you do exactly that.
"we should have a plan," ingeniumu speaks up, "4 groups of two who continue on and do their tasks, and I think twice should be on security, just incase the imposter attacks again," everyone nods.
"i'll go with wonder," dabi states, already grabbing your hand,
"dont you think you'll get distracted with...other things?" tomura smirks, dabi clenching your hand in his.
"fuck. off."
"oo feisty~"
dabi glares, "yknow you dont really seem to care much that thirteens dead!"
tomura's eyes flash a dangerous color and he leans forward.
"the FUCK did you just say?"
"you heard me you fucking incel,"
"stop!" ingeniumu yells, "tomura is right, you guys do get quite distracted, wonder is with hawks, dabi your with shoto. ill go with tomura and that leaves deku and kaachan, with twice on security. let's go!"
dabi grumbles but goes with his brother as you lightly kiss him on the cheek and go with hawks.
you cant help but think about how amazing that kid is gonna be when hes older as a captain of his own ship.
you and hawks head off, both of you checking your list and stopping by rooms, the other waiting as they finish their task and repeating, until hawks sighed.
"how are you dating that asshole?"
you laugh, "hes not too bad once he likes you,"
"and what? he just doesn't like me?"
"exactly."
"what if he didnt like thirteen?" your smile drops instantly.
"hawks..."
"I'm just saying!"
"well STOP saying! I know dabi and he wouldnt betray me like that, so whatever accusations you have against MY boyfriend, I dont wanna here it," you scowl as you check your notebook, and started heading forward, "c'mon. I have to do wires in electrical."
hawks stayed quiet through the walk, as you stormed forward, wanting to get as much away from him as possible without ACTUALLY losing him. if you were being honest you were scared of going off alone.
as you walked in electrical you instantly went towards the wires, not noticing hawks standing in the doorway,
"wonder?"
"yes hawks?" you snap.
"I just saw someone vent." you pause and turn around.
"where and who?!"
"I dont know! I just saw the vent close when we walked in here and since Thirteen had the key before he died, that means that only the imposter can vent!"
"fuck! why would they vent though?!"
hawks paused. "maybe they killed someone again."
tears filled your eyes as you started searching the dark room, almost tripping over something, you only briefly looked up but you choked back a sob.
it was a foot.
"hawks!"
he came running towards you from behind the wall and saw the foot, gulping as he turned on the flashlight.
there say ingeniumu, with his throat slashed.
you couldnt hold back the cry that left your throat as hawks pulled you in for a hug, mostly to hide his own tears.
"what's going on in here?" you heard dabi's voice and you lifted you head to see him and shoto.
he looked mad but when hawks gestured with his flashlight towards the body, the brief flash letting both of the boys see, dabi understood.
"c'mere baby," he grabbed you quickly and held you tight as you sobbed into his chest, dabi looked up at his brother, "shoto can you call a meeting?" he asked softly. you assumed shoto nodded because there were no other words spoken.
there you all sat again, in cafeteria.
you were sniffling as dabi played with your hair, you holding shoto close as he leaned into you, still in shock of seeing his friend's lifeless corpse like that.
deku stood tall and didnt bother to hide the tears streaming down his face and even kaachan was caught sniffling a bit.
twice sat quietly in the corner, with his elbows on his knees.
hawks though, was red in the face from anger. and the victim of his anger was none other than tomura.
"you were teamed up with him fuckface!"
tomura simply shrugged, "I got bored and wanted to check on twice, see if he was alive,"
"well he is! but your partner fucking isnt!" hawks jammed his finger against the other mans chest, "and I think YOURE the cause!"
tomura raised his eyebrows, "I was with twice, right twice?" he did a 180 to stare hard at twice who looked up slightly and slowly nodded. that seemed to please tomura though as he turned back around, "see?"
"that doesnt mean shit! you were supposed to be with him!"
"but I wasnt."
"but you WERE! that's why the kid is dead!"
"I say we vote." shoto's voice was muffled by your neck and dabi's chest, where he was currently crammed in, but it was still intelligible.
you raise your head and wipe a few stray tears, "I think that's smart sho,"
you all nod and murmur in agreement.
"fine then. let's vote." hawks glares at tomura one last time, "who says skip?"
tomura, twice and shoto raise their hands.
"i dont think theres enough evidence." shoto explains and you nod, quietly telling him that theres nothing wrong with his belief.
hawks has a slight triumph look on his face, "who says that tomura is a fucking psychopath who likes to murder children!"
"murder a child. thirteen is practically twice my age" tomura corrects, "and besides I didn't do it."
hawks rolls his eyes, "whatever, everyone just vote."
you, dabi, hawks, deku and kaachan raise your hand, making you guys the winner.
"perfect." hawks drags tomura over to the ejecting room, usually used for heavier garbage that didnt fit in the disposal.
as you all surrounding the glass wall that separated you and tomura you cried a bit more.
sure you hated this dude but you still KNEW him!
"anything left to say sicko?" hawks glared at the smiling tomura.
"maybe you arent as much of a bird brain as I thought hawks. good job, you win," he does a slight bow like this was a performance before hawks pulls the lever, tomura's body flying out before hawks closed it again.
"he admitted to it." deku stated simply.
"yeah."
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Text
Clone Wars     Shadow      Warriors
            Seas 4
Oh    this-   just    screams      edgy        ...   Whelp
So is Jar      Jar an     adult,       now,?            (Asking because before his    characteri         zation was force of nature to child
Now he    seems to have his own    personality.
Which is fine   if you want to change some details for the sake of a    better story,      (Or to simply      explore         a new       angle,).    Aesthetic
     Just.            need to make sure I’m holding them to the right standard,
    Okay,
   That-         was    relatively     adult,
  Mm
   Um.
   I
 Aight        .           .       Well-
   Wait 
    Did they just call Jar Jar     away from      Cou-ncil-
    .         I mean they are clearly    trying       which          is   some thing       I do       give credit   for-
   Though                The             Tone              Is            Robot-                 Ic-
       (Though that might be int-         entional since it seems to be hinting that this lady is practicing some kind of         mind tricks on him
   (Aka, he’s doing it         under           tox, because we don’t do suspension of choice in     dra-         mat         ic       Me-     -dia,
 S’up
 What?
  I-
  -
   H-elp
Screw my own   accou-   -ntability     -      See that was the correct   -amount of   emotion-
.        Okay        -         Right-
  Sus-       (pic)
    No one noticed the obvious people right there?
  Like not even      Mr. sus         there?
[or are they just so    kind that it’s like   oh yeah we were just talking hate speech     but go right ahead?
Logic?
 There
  Yeah    some shit is definitely going on,
   For sake of argument*     sake, i’m just going to assume that his reaction to      toxic    behavior
*Account     ability-
 Any way
  I-
  I’m still      going to try,
  Despite  you clearly saying you want understood
   Because assumed authority        - and assuming you know better than a person about themselves
     Is totally ok-
     - In this         society
-[Cries        in       sad    “accountability,”     -of-      war,        ]
  Whelp,
  In-    flue-     n      -c      e
 Still an  adult-
  Okay-
 Imagine    it was just a normal necklace     and he pulled that shit-
[Ok for the sake of argument I’m going to assume the necklace is symbolism for toxic influence,
  Being around it         enabling]
  It-         -       His voice voice dropped like         - 6 octaves
     Also I swear if they try to   excuse him      for his actions-
     No
    Mind over matter     -Okay, so they’re not excusing him for his   -actions,
   Me-          an         -       OK so it’s not naturally evil it    just comes down to the users      so that dude was still totally responsible,
  Didn’t    change    - much
    -     Ha-Ha
  Actual     gas     -lighting”
    Also     persuade,            -             Okay,     good not excusing him       from his actions,      -      Thing
The   gaslighting goes deep      -      Also isn’t the Darkside supposed to be      negative over involvement?      -       Aight-         -       -           A-lone
  Oh yeah that’s a great idea let’s just let the  dude that just got gaslighted and completely fell forward go back into the person who did it,
 👍
     Genius     
    (This Jedi Council is fucking                  brilliant)
     Gas-       Light-         Ing
(Note;      Confronting the gas lighter is never the way       to do it       (Inter-             Gen-)          (Excluding accountability of the abuser     (Gen-break           Venting Pro-      Ced- u        re)
 [as you’re usually too angry     to let them get a word in edgewise        And remain;           in control)
  With inter- gen productivity,         They are possibly given       five warnings before         Being          Kick        ed-]
   For the sake of argu-       ment as well       as simplicity-
    We’re stick       -ing with        bas-         ic-
    If someone’s acting toxic        with you, you         reflect and you don’t have to         hang out with anyone         you don’t want to,
    Logic
   This dude      is very clearly making it obvious that    he’s willing to listen to this person,
 And, enabling
“Cl-”
See he’s gaslighting him again      because   he thinks he can get away with it,
With no   accoun-       tability-
 (Or the small bit      this society      believes      in     which is    jail,”
Wr-
Oh!
 Is he a     Gungan      Jedi?
  Also,
  You Don’t  
    SAY!
(The repeated Gaslighter      who has shown multiple times to be     toxic,       Was toxic,    (And prepared to use any means to      subvert the         will? 
Prize  for the  most   in  competent      Je      di
 Like,        Serious-         (Really had to put those two    accoun  t-      ability- cells      to good -    use-”
(For   matting       issue-)
  The writer just saving us the effort of him coming downstairs -all feckin- weird, and the   obvious    “should’ve seen that coming,     “
   ?             ha-ha
    What?
Oh yeah       no the creepy magical stuff wasn’t enough of a      fecking clue in-
  Appar-
   Whelp-
  He   snapped out of that quick-
  Like didn’t even need a      reverse- mind trick
   Good for      him-
   And - actual-     nar-    rative-        -
   Whelp,
   Wreck-ing      -house
       Okay, but how do you think this is going to look to the general public like two Jedi,( very good at persuasion -    mind tricks’ -just showed up, now they’re leader and said Jedi are wreck-ing one of their minster’s houses-  
     One who could’ve     feign-           ed lack of support for the        war
     Like if this is a     set up-  
 the chips-      are about to fall,
 Da-
Okay, seriously how obviously evil,    was this person?
Like we have a weird creepy room,     The robots apparently hanging from the    chandelier    (eck)         And      the knife
   Like if this person      ever-       went-   through a checkpoint
   Also,        Oh-
    That-
   (That     really        does not      look good,)
    Bo-ss
   Yeah,       she clearly has    medical experience,
 (Also yeah    that’s really going to make it    better-”
 Oh yeah the    senator was      seen trying to clean up the      evidence-
    Well the Jedi ran out     full sword’s- a blazing
    (Instead of you know the       Senator chasing after him,         While the peacekeeper stayed behind and tried to        tend to the person,]
   Great     -        -       Or    Not-
Well- tensions    just got raised,
  Of,
 Ai.     Ght, 
 Whelp,
(Okay, no way he’s totally not dead      but sure-)
 A-i-
  -
 Whe-
   That-       sucks-          -         Un-     Con-cious
    That-   doesn’t tell me anything else-
   Like;        Critical      condition?
   D-usk
   Li-terally       no one else?
    (Like don’t get me wrong I’ve been a pretty big Jar-jar fan ever since the change-)
   But really, the Senator, the person that spends the most time away from your - planet
   That’s the person,     they trust the most?
  Ai-
  Hm-
Oh yeah just put on the deadly leaders hat-
   The rese-mblance-
   Not really?
   I mean all humans technically    look the same-
  But-
 Pretty sure Jar jar is a lot      scrawn-         thin        -er
    Also if they’re not going to listen to him as him       they’re not going to listen to him      as he pretends to be their (dead) leader
Also, please don’t go with the      liar revealed plot,
    Yeah no, they have completely different kind of light.   tones,
     The face structure-
    Co-mpletely         different-
     -
   Nope
 -Dead
 Di-ssent
  Agree
   I-
   OK yeah I’m just gonna go over the fact, that as previously state,  I am not a huge fan of the liar revealed plot-
    -or lying
  (No because it’s- unrealistic-    - or there’s anything wrong with it
  -people do lie
     -maybe because of how overdone and             poorly done it’s been,
             -With the liar getting off Scott free without any                  weight
               But I really don’t like this               plot-
-And    the   skip    button    maybe   used     ad-     nausuem-   -
       [Well- shit       [for reference; I was using the skip button ad nausuem when I randomly stopped at the part      with    Greivous
        Things just got a whole lot worse]
         [Tumblr             Refresh]       -
   Any        Way,
   Aww,     That’s kind of nice the    friendship and reliance       the dude has on      Other-        Half            -         Yes        ‘Boss       Leoni’        when someone gets         tox         you leave-        - In a      - relation          ship-  
      Also yeah he’s definitely not       ‘Boss         Leoni’            -            He would’ve stayed and tried to take the    tox
 (Aka Jar-jar is less ena-     bling, les-        tox-     And     Doesn’t       Take        It        For          Much        More.            Than            He            Has               To,
        (He’s   les   -s
      Dyfun.  -c)
      Okay
       Good            Job     -     Also - yeah   how’d you manage that         -         That-
Didn’t get   car   ried up the chain of   com-     mand-        -            Then again Gri-   evous has shown to be a pretty   shit boss.     -      So I can’t blame these guys    for being like yeah compl-      ete stranger     I will totally      take a nap       -right    ,now-         -      You        kinda      have      sticks-        -    [The rain is   really    nice,]
[is this the first time we’ve seen them use active     particle effects      for the camera?
  Either way       it’s really        nice            -
Oh,
They’re    
electric     sticks,
That makes   sense
[- bet     ter      for      Figh     t-      In-       g-
Stop one     1v1     -ing-        It
    I
  W-h
   Again this is what happens when you 1v1 it    and    don’t assume accountability-     - -   
 [Don’t fight a metal cyborg with metal sticks when you’re not prepared to take it, full way,)
   I-
  [I feel like this is supposed to be some    big build up but they only shared like one scene where dude was completely silent,]
  Like,
   Sacr-ifice
    Die to take someone out with you
[Great
  Now
   Ouch]
   Are   they actually going to kill off      grievous because this isn’t look-ing    too    - good      -         Shit-
 Dude-      is still not dead-       -       How?        -          Whelp-           -          Oh,    hey      where the fuck    did you come      from,
 I-           Ack.      Br-u-      Tal
W-el
 -       Un         -         M           -              Plan-
“ damn it        he messed up the       script-,           -Pal   - patine
     Cap-
    Prison   break-
   Also yeah     that’s probably like        a vacation    for him-
 Given     how toxic these assholes     are           -            Ex- change           -           Damn             Ship      per-
      Also screw the 150 or how many other                 sena   -tors        -       Only     Amidala           -      matters          -          A-       ight-     -      Also, dude knows where everyone’s      lair,      Is,
 Like he pissed off Grievous with    -his
 Now he’s just chilling in this      dude’s    sipping earl gray       Or-      Some        Shit-
  Him
  Okay
 Getting a little    ahead of yourself     episode-       -       O k
    I
   Hearing this,  Skywalker doesn’t immediately run back      shout        -ing      nope-        - -       Because, to my knowledge the speaking at      room volume,
  Not    whispering        and the distance        isn’t enough to      -explain it             -            Ai          -   -           Wel-             -      There goes one        min-ion-             -             Droids are apparently    expensive enough to      chastise    Grievous          over-
  But sen-tient - beings are        a dime’     a ‘dozen-
    (Also    gaslighter’s.     don’t give a shit about        you     dear,       God,
  The Painful     dramatic-        irony-
 *tra-      gic-      Wh-      -Oa
 Ai     -     Ri-
  An
  Wh-     -elp,
   You know if it wasn’t for the exposure     earl-        ier   
I would assume they would think that the Jedi was just killing all their Im-por-        tant- elected officials
     Why?
     Wh-at
    He’s right.    -         But dude- that’s pretty      ham fisted-
   I mean-
  How many episodes          (and       possibly        seasons-)      do we have to            go-            - -     Anakin-       is a dick    to lanterns-       -        Also the random theme of the     bots-      coming out of nowhere-    continues-       -     St     -op-          -        Wh-       elp-
    .
    ?         (He          live?)
      I-
      ?
  Good           Play-
     Ah-
    To-
       Oh, yeah,       He’s alive we’re not going to bring that up in any      mention-able way?
      Ike
    Wh     e     l-      p
     Oh           -     That was   -nice-
   You deceived everyone and lied to all          our people,  you’ll make a great      leader,
   Or a great council/    committee leader considering that they do have an open position          ,            Best
I like that they had one bad ass fall and had it replace-d by Dooku being particularly bad-ass       -          In his      place-
In the trade off near the end really speaks to the     frag-ility of war
   I thought-
   It was pretty al-right    Though it really did seem like     - they were trying to build up to something but the structure unfortunately        just didn’t support it,
   Which is unfortunate because they do seem like      bits- that could’ve been nice
   Like Jar-jar being a constant       peacekeeper-
   The underwater        nations-
     Wars be-           tween          - Those               Dude’s
   And that    general guy      -        Who seems to be like he was supposed to be this     - really big deal
 [probably intended to do something      massive in the previous       arcs,]
    But, here,    all he did was that one scene,
    [Would’ve worked better if he was like this Re-       Public Gen-       Er          Al-
    To the      shark guy-
     And Akbar,
     Was just like the resident         enforcer-
     Or something to do with the       prince
    I think it would’ve really worked better with the concept of        ‘being taken’        under,               As well that possibly being a good contrast between     Jar Jar         binks          And        Char-        If Jar- jar got promoted-        With Char being eager at first but then realizing he just         can’t-          And Jar- Jar being reluctant at first but realizing he      can-
   [Note; assumed authority is bad,         Just- some people are better at using it for venting         than others)
   Nope boomers vs throw-         it-back, boom-
       I-
     And it really did feel like this episode       -should’ve been the split one 
   Nearing the end- it started to feel like the 1st-       part of a second ep-
    Which is fine
    Just cut-        of-
   Episode all around being al-right, with just several parts that didn’t make quite sense including the emphasis on the general for that one scene,
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cs-discourse · 4 years
Note
it is my dream to unlock all of the cs & discourse mods backstories. why is juice box filled with hatred? why does phe hint vaguely at a sad angst backstory? ( legit tho phe, you ok? ) why do rando anons dislike cinna for super petty reasons? why did I think phe and peach were the same mod? why does raey suck so much? actually, why do all the rp mods suck so much? these are some of the questions I hope will be answered by the unlocking of the mods backstories.
fjjvhdhhche honestly, if you really wanna know, sit tight for a second. Youve unlocked my sad anime backstory by asking 😔😔😔😜 But yeah tw for abuse and suicide ig.
So to keep this as short as I can, my mom yeeted basically as soon as I was born, my dad went off to war and when he came back he couldnt hold any jobs so me and him lived w my grandparents (who were taking care of me when he was gone too). My grandmother (bitchma from now on) hates him (and i hated him for a while, but now I see why she did and I love him) and kicked him out bc he had no job and major ptsd.
So I lived with gparents up until I was 18. In that time I was basically subjected to gaslighting, manipulation, all types of mental and physical abuse, mostly by bitchma. They believed in spanking (ofc. which is fucking horrble. do not spank your child) and I would legit have panic attacks??? anxiety attacks? (not sure which. i bever figured it out) where I couldnt breathe and I hyperventilated and sobbed and it was horrible, and bitchma would just tell me to “Stop that, you can breathe” while im sobbing and gasping for air. She’ll get mad at anything and everything, screamed constantly, blamed me for everything. Always said “Well (insert other child) didnt do this” or “I bet your friend (only friend i talked about) gets good grades”. Would scream at me about clothes I would wear, even if she backhandedly approved them earlier. Would hurt my feelings and when I would cry or feel the courage to tell her she hurt me she would just say “the world doesnt revolve around you”. Never apologized. Got mad at me for bad grades when I was in such a bad mind state because I had to live there with her. Said “I’ve never had a child that’s failed before, even your dad got good grades. But it seems like the only thing you can do.” That hurt me a lot. I remember it so clearly. I tried to kill myself that day, and other days, but by then I had friends I cared for. And I loved my friends as my family. If I did it, they would hurt and I never wanted to do that to them.
But coming back to my dad hate, she hates him because she couldn’t mold him into a perfect little child and was realizing she couldn’t mold me into a perfect child either. My dad and I have such similar personalities and likes it’s insane. Most likely because we were raised by the same tyrant with the same mindset of “I hate her”. He’s told me that even though he’s literally been deployed in war, some of the shit she’s done has given him more ptsd than it. I moved in with him when I turned 18. This is the happiest I’ve been in my entire life, escaping that hellhole. There’s so much more she’s done, but honestly I don’t have the willpower and don’t want to drone on, this is very long.
But yeah. She’s the only person that I’ve ever had no mercy for. When I heard she may have cancer, I was so fucking happy. But she didn’t, sadly. With the shit bitchma subjected me to, I honestly wish her the worst with her growing age. That’s how much fucking pain she’s caused me. Sorry to dump, but 1: you did ask and 2: it feels nice to vent
.phe
-
You probably thought we were both the same because I tend to keep to myself and both mod names start with P and I was signing as MP for a while when I started typoing Peach a lot and wanted to save myself the trouble.
Also, here’s my backstory LOL.. o<-<
I was born with a tumor disorder called infantile myofibromatosis and all that means is that I had self-resolving tumors all over my body at about age 3. As a result of the tumors going away, I spent a lot of years 8-12 in the hospital getting spinal transfusion work and checkups due to a destroyed vertebra, which would have resulted in paralysis from the waist down if untreated. I’ve got some pretty neat scars from all of this and I kinda want to get them turned into tattoos but I can’t because of MRIs scheduled for every 10 years.
Thankfully, the surgeries worked and I could resume “normal” activity approved by my surgeon at about 16. I have pictures of my before and after spinal x-rays if anyone wants to see. I think they’re kinda cool.
I tend to be a shut book about everything unless we’re friends and usually when I tell people everything they’re like D: I’m so sorry. So I just skip the guilt of sharing and don’t.
I’ve got a lot of nostalgic interests because I feel like I’m always trying to make up for lost time but I’m working on letting some things go.
My family tries to be supportive most of the time but my father is manipulative and tries to gaslight everyone. He kinda treats everyone in the house like we exist to serve him like a king and my brother’s frustrations often wind up being exploded all over my mother and I. It’s very a toxic household situation and I was happier before COVID when I could party and club and avoid my family with my college friends but I think that ship has sailed.
I’m currently in the process of trying to save money for future rent and new clothing, take my GRE again to raise my score above 160 and then fly the coop for good. It’ll probably take a year for all of this at least, if not longer. We’ll see. // Mod Peach
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sikereviewdotcom · 4 years
Text
strawberry shortcake s2 ep1 - horse of a different color
this one was suggested by someone who couldnt keep their mouth shut and not sing the strawberry shortcake intro theme in the middle of our economy class
no one wanted to hear that, but they  went ahead and then i actually followed up on that train of thoughts i remembered about the fucking cartoons and i knew it pronto: its a must-see shit its like slightly above the level of magical school bus series, but the final rating is for the fin not the beginning so lets begin this horseshit:
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were reviewing “horse of a different color”, it focuses indeed on strawberrys horse, honey pie pony (its her entire damn name, how sweet right? like all of them, i got diabete from this review but its the cost of maintaining this blog anyway, the kids are playing together on a that tree having fun jumping around like chimpanzees hooba hooba but sadly our filly quickly realizes she cant play king kong with them and keep falling on her ass,
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yet since theyre all retarded or young (id say its a fifty-fifty case for them kinda normal ig, i mean they ARE literal 6yo) they try several ways of getting her up on that tree, not thinking how to get her down if they ever were to succeed (good for them: aint happening) its child labor too btw, from an horse still same deal what if honey pie fell down on them? crushing them corpses with her mighty pounds? the findus company would be delighted to hear such news, im sure its some quality (sweet ass) horse meat
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once it all fails she understands a horse isnt meant to climb a tree, too big too fat its four legged, not even entertaining the relationship giraffes have with trees
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but it aint over, then (after a talk with herself) hp hears the laughters of a bunch of kids which catches her attention, it always does who can ignore that sorta noise? although she aint annoyed by it shes just into the idea of riding a bike now, shes even gonna get a go at it oh yea thats it we finally found her human hobby gogdamn shes a backward furry
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of course it fails aswell since she has no hand for the handle and shes heavy so i guess its the reason why she rides into w/e and cant stop? because otherwise she couldve also just.. actually it makes no sense does it? i mean she couldve easily stopped the ride actually how is that kid bike even holding her? ive never tried putting a pony on a bike for 6 y/o but i doubt about its capacity in not being crushed aswell as i doubt in the kids bones not being severely damaged after a visit under honey pies horsy buttcheeks
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but all of that really makes her sad: she cant play with her human friends and shes the only horse around strawberry land or whatever see me tearing it for her, theres so much emotions in this episode especially after that filly trynna get kids to get into some horseplay horseshit like dude theyre only 6, lets go easy on them, might have a problem with the parents of the kids watching this episode no one even thought how fucked up this one part is? sure horseplay isnt only sexual or w/e but it still is the visual of 6yos on all four jumping around and neighing together with their ass a little bit too exposed wow im going on a dangerous road here? aint i? not gonna sue the writers im sure it was their subconscious speaking probably got issues from their childhood, eventually got them sorted out since 2004 what do i know? aside from me not caring
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back on track : after seeing horsey being so sad the kiddos decide to get her a horse friend but where the fuck? they got no idea, they are proud nonetheless and go tell honey the good new until they are like “wait but we have no idea where to find horses!” ofc we get a big reveal, some serious strawberry shortcake lore: actually all the horses, ALL OF THEM FROM THE ENTIRE FUCKING PLANET are on one (1) single island: ice cream themed to diversify it all they are just chilling over there in ponyland and for some reason this one here got lost or idk guys she took the boat and checked the rest of the world out as an even younger filly, found strawberry and her friends and decided now she was a centaur  slash humanrry furry human, idk you get it but shes their friend and so on to introduce the concept of an AWESOME island full of equestrian activity and ofc ice cream but its kinda lame because who cares? everythings already made out of food, also why isnt the ice cream melting? its one water? nevermind for the introduction as i was saying, hp sings an horrendous sounding song it deteriorated my ear drums they got pierced or something  or maybe im exagerrating? either case horses cant sing:
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so to the ice cream land they go, huh
of course it wouldnt be a big adventure without an almost broken bridge oh no whatever shall we do? could we possibly cross it safely? lets try it out  guys: yay it worked good for us little stress and suspense it was wack how they got honey pie out of the hole her big ass hoove made im mesmerized by the power of friendship and sugar at this point, just in full awe for the rest of the episode probably over dosed on all the ice cream flavoured horseshit, i got some all over my mouth its dripping on my desk i gotta clean that later
next thing we know: horses its all this episode is about (aside from labor) but you see, so far hp would switch between normal human language and neighing well turns out her other fellow equines can only neigh and so they just neigh together while our english well-spoken mammal translates to the moronic kids who just smile smuggly
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of course the animals are having a welcome party then, dancing around while the morons are just bored, harsh one being a cartoon character isnt it guys? w/e theyre gonna ask for honey pie to come back home now, convinced that her natural habit isnt her place and she loves them too much to just leave them and never come back and break any plans they ever had together- oh shit looks like shes leaving forever huh? what a plot twist mark that on the bitch quota for today
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the first one to leave is the little boy btw, important thing to note: hes the biggest pussy he cant even face reality: oh no, no more pony back time before sleep thats quite a bummer, downer and man how are they going to survive now they got no animal to watch over them? jesus theyre soon, on the boat (idk where they got it from idk why suddenly theyre on a boat because then theyre once again gonna cross that bridge but ok) anyway yea theyre having a relationship crisis during that ship trip yada yada ah and the bridge, because (see i do not call them morons for now reasons obviously they deserve this title not only because theyre 6 but also because they are just daft:) they proceed, once in the middle of the bridge all 4 of them, to stop and wonder
“will the bridge be able to hold all of us? wont it break? damn i wonder if it will crack” and they talks without moving until vlam: a tree comes and breaks it (dont ask) so now theyre in trouble:
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back to ponyland: bitch pie realizes how much she misses her actual friends and that she can speak english which her other horse friends cant do so she is special and probably abnormal, shes a big outcat of the pony society and has no other reason but to escape her incoming death sentence for fraternizing with the humans of course none of the second part is true, she just wants to see the kids again so she says asta la vista baby to the neigher team and runs away see, she hasnt taken the boat and yet also arrive to the bridge? why a boat sequence then? i will skip this for now but it WILL play in the rating, imagine im the parent of the youngster watching this crap and i have to endure it
if it sucks this bad and is this illogical i might just get bored and change the channel, idc my progeny aint gonna be watching this in either case, ill make them watch political debates then interrogate them on what they learned after what but it wasnt actual political debates just random furry youtuber venting with their fursona sprites animated and thats how you make your kids retarded, the kick of this joke is that i aint planning on getting any kids but totally gonna make them watch classics too such as the attack of the killer donuts as soon as they reach 6 so they wont be dumb and probably not getting diabete or w/e in their adulthood
then honey pie saves the kids btw all of them, heavy shit
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and they all go back to strawberryland, happily after a big “wow i missed you sm, you are my real friends w/e if you dont look like me i aint speciest guys really!” theyre all vegan too btw so this works for them i havent watched enough strawberry shortcake episodes to know if they ever eat meat but i have doubts seeing how theyre into a very cannibalistic diet which include eating dessert when obviously thats what they are at least half part, this cartoon raises a lot of political questions it may have a deeper value than i first attributed to it
the end: another terrible song plays about horseshit and how tasty it is
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thats all folks
so the rating: big 6/10, so you know 5/10 if its a decent kid show where im highly eager to click on the x and get back making jams but nah
surprisingly enough, i only wanted to stop watching half of the episode and not the entirity of it so credits for thats since im an adult and not a kid, imagining kids enjoyed this sweet childish cartooness or w/e now why +1? its because of how many political questions it raised, how it made me think about our society and cakes yknow its more than kids having a conflict with an horse it talks about veganism, specism, handicap, cannibalism, the management of the limited ressources were exploiting and so on yea really makes you think, its subliminal messages to make kids smarter: they watch their dessert-imbecile counterparts doing bs and then get it right irl: good  ah- it also makes it better for you when youre watching this with your kid, you suddenly transcend to another level of spirituality, existential crisis activated or at least reasoning mode or w/e youre willing to name this the point is you arent bored still despite all of this i rated it quite low for such a serious kid cartoon what couldve possibly made me tic? 1) kids are morons and cant understand all of this, not clear enough for the targeted public 2) projection onto the characters/dialogues from the writers of their childhood traumas (the horse play event didnt go unnoticed, karren brown) 3) my little pony ripoff 4) its controversial, our society, especially in 2004 couldnt understand the depth of this shit and finally 5) i got so much ice cream flavoured horseshit all over my desk god help me this is so filthy what a fucking mess i would totally recommand it to anyone who feels like being blown away by the statements made in this work of art 6/10 but really we all know in the future, itll be a 9/10, some ahead-of-its-time-crap
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tg, out
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myapogee · 3 years
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therapy is expensive but tumblr read mores are free. (not that i want anyone to therapy me, i just need to vent)
at dinner i was like very obviously Not Good so my mom asked me about it and i sorta hummed and hahhed until saying how i just really hate my job and wanna quit and later this month i’m gonna talk to my boss about that to see if we cant find a way to make me Hate My Job Less
and my sister came in at some point, missing part of the convo, and was like “well if you’re going to quit, you need to start looking for work before then” and my mom’s all like, “yeah put your resume on linked in or indeed, etc”
and like. i told them i wasnt gonna quit for awhile, i’ll just let my boss know i’m unhappy and have a few months to work thru it and try to get happier and if that fails THEN i will quit.
but the reason i said that is because i dont wanna tell them my real back up plan which is “actually i dont wanna live at all, so if i quit or get fired i’ll probably just kill myself” bc that is not good etiquette to mention at the dinner table
idk i feel like. like when i was younger i was at a point where i was like “i want to die, but so does everyone else, so i guess i’ll keep living because they somehow do”. and then i learned i was wrong so i went into “i want to want to live, so i’m gonna make the most of what i have, now that i know wanting to die isn’t normal”. 
and now im just. like. fucking exhausted from trying that hard. i want to die, and i recognize that a certain amount of other people do too, and many of those other people either Actually Just Die or they get help or something i dont fucking know how the other ones get thru that tbh bc if i did i wouldnt be where i am. 
what if i just. spent my week off from work putting all my things into boxes. like drawings that i dont want my family to see into the recycling or a box labeled “please burn this if you respected me at all”. put some women’s clothes into a box labeled “never been worn: donate to good will”. etc etc. and then just. i dont fucking know man. i googled some stuff about overdosing on pills and google was like “here’s the suicide prevention hotline number”. thanks google, ya mean well. 
everyday just kinda sucks. and then if one thing goes a little wrong i spend the remainder wanting to die. and there are good moments. there are funny youtube videos. there are good tv shows. there are games of cards against humanity with my family and of D&D type games with online friends. there’s stuff that brings me joy. but its like. guess its fucking selfish of me to say but it’s... not enough? 
the biggest thing is almost def my job. and if i enjoyed it more, things would probably be better. so i should quit and find a new one. thats just. easier said than done.i wish my job could go back to being what it used to be. but things changed like a year ago or maybe two years now idfk time is an illusion. and its just. been shit ever since. 
i’ve started learning portuguese more seriously. been doing the few minutes a day on a couple different apps. i think. my ideal existence. would be moving out to my grandmother’s home in portugal, living alone now that they’ve moved on. it’s lovely there year round, so i get my exercise walking to the lil convenience store, getting some things to eat and bake with, having bread delivered by the bread truck to my home every day. the house is paid for, so all i have are utilities and food. which i pay for thru commissions online. maybe some sore of artwork with the local people. there’s land, and anyone who wants it can do with it what they will but all i ask is if they grow any food i get a little now and then. i get to be a hermit, but i’ll help out my neighbors now and then, and i know they’ll help me too. it’s a community, but with its share of isolation, and without the obligations i feel here. i grow old, having lived my own life on my own time. eventually, i’m found dead there, by a curious neighbor who didn’t care quite enough to find me before it was too late. but it wasn’t suicide. just age and the problems that come with it. but i’ve lived with minimal capitalism, with few to no family or friends or pets. there’s solace, silence, and peace. i have lived life, and can leave it without worry.
... that wont happen though. as long as my parents are alive, i am bound to them, and if i did manage to leave this house and go anywhere at all never mind portugal i dont think i would be free of the worry over them. familial obligation, holidays, etc. i can’t live without worry while i’m avoiding them and feeling guilty about it. but i can’t live as myself without worry while i’m still shackled to them too. if i stay alive, i’ll be in limbo for years as they grow older and i need to help take care of them or find people/places that can take care of them for me but that i need to pay for. etc etc. there’s so much. responsibility in this world. that i never asked for. god i just wish i was never born, really. it’s amazing to me now that anyone can have kids. like raise orphans or whatever sure. but to actually birth a child into this existence, knowing how terrible the world is? why would you choose to put someone through that? why force them to experience this, it’s dreadful. 
this. okay that latest paragraph, i wanna be clear, i 100% am not ever gonna kill someone. like i’m not gonna hurt my parents so i can live free or whatever, and i’m not saying taking someone out of this life is better than bringing them into it, etc. i’m suicidal sure but i’m not a fucking asshole.
anyways.
pls don’t... fucking reply to this in any way or even acknowledge it. i know it all already okay? the pandemic has brought people down. capitalism brings people down. the fucking winter and its holidays bring people down. i know. 
its just. a painful cycle to be in. and i really think. there’s only one way to break it. and we’re all gonna die eventually so it’s just. how long do i have to feel like shit. before i’ve earned freedom from feeling anything at all. why push back the inevitable. when it would benefit me so much to fucking embrace it.
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beccawastaken · 7 years
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My life summarized Pt. 1...
I started this blog cause there is always so much in my head, it moves at the speed of light, some of it makes complete and utter sense, some of it sounds great til the very second it rolls off my tongue and then sounds nothing like it did in my head, some of it is just random nonsensical stuff that seems to have fallen off a stand up comedians cue cards and straight into the part of my psyche that prefers her own lyrics. It makes it very hard to focus on one task to completion, I even tend to put down my guitar and journal for months on end...so sad!
I must admit that I have worked my ass off to try to make some kind of sense of it all and now when I am unable to rather than let frustration take over I tend to find my random head ramblings amusing. I mean it is often a frustrated, shaking my head at myself kind of amusing but still...baby steps right? 
Sometimes the thoughts can be so intense and so rapid that its overwhelming and it takes every ounce of my strength not to scream til it stops. At its worst its almost like there are so many thoughts moving so quickly that it can sound like a constant high pitch buzz in my head. Super exhausting, and difficult to explain to those around you. People tell me to just go to sleep...ever tried sleeping with a shop vac on or inside a construction site? That would be comparable to this, plus, sleeping also isn't my forte so I’m double fucked so to speak.
The human mind and psyche intrigues me to no end. The way it works, and how the basic brain functions are the same across society yet our perception and the cogs and wheels inside each skull are as unique as our deoxyribonucleic acid. For each and every one of us, the way we tick can be vastly different from one another, from the person beside you on the bus, to that guy you’ve worked with for years to a lover or spouse and often really have no way of knowing. I mean how often do we turn to each other and say “can we talk about how your brain works?” We just take for granted that it does and don’t give it a second thought.(haha you will come to notice my love for puns)
Its the intricate differences between us that keep me interested in this self sabotaging species, I mean really, Earth doesn’t need humans to survive, in fact it may be better off without us! Who knows, what I do know is that while im here on this seemingly massive planet im going to make the most of it. 
I have a wicked sense of humour (ask anyone haha) and I enjoy messing with people (in a jovial way of course). Im talking like practical joke type of messing with people, light, innocent funny shit. I have been referred to as a brain ninja...I took it as a compliment, however, when you are on the receiving end its possible that it isnt nearly as enjoyable. I do my best not to be mean (I said I do my best, I am not perfect) cause you know, I’m no psycho, although some will attest to that statement not being true, I have honed my inner psycho and now only use her when absolutely necessary. Like if some douchelord crosses one of my angels or my grandson. Then my wrath should be feared, simple enough right? (WOW that escalated quickly! O_O)
I just do not want to waste my life, I spent so much of it not knowing how to handle daily life, assuming (naturally cause why wouldn’t I as a single child raised by someone that constantly blamed others and the world for her problems) that everyone’s mind worked the same, everybody deals with the racing and loops of thoughts you cant kick, or falls asleep with a song stuck in they’re head and wakes up and it starts again as if paused. Every morning. (Don’t drop that duh duh duh....grrr) For days! I mean doesn't everybody worry about every move they make, and lay in bed with they’re eyes closed trying to sleep and checking the clock twenty minutes later only to find SURPRISE, its been three hours! Or this relentless saviour complex I have, I can solve almost anyone's problem or at least help them find a path they are more comfy with but for years when it came to mine, I just couldn’t. This is just a few of the things i deal with or have been forced to deal with this life, Im sure i will touch on more. 
I have my children to thank for helping me learn how to deal with my version of life and not giving up on me when I know it would have been easier at times. (Dont drop that duhduhduh....ugh) I want to be honest in this blog, I pride myself on my honesty yet shy away from the darker, not so beautiful sides of who I am as if they don’t exist to the outside world. The thing is, I do not look sick, in fact I look great, besides a few extra pounds. My illness is not a physical one yet it has complete control from the inside out a lot of the time. I work very hard on a daily basis so I do not look like I am falling apart.
I feel emotions at a much higher level than the majority of humanity, I know this now. I don’t feel a lil bit of anything, if im sad, im so sad that even just being in my presence can break your heart. If something good happens and I feel a twinge of joy, I literally have to physically hold myself still sometimes cause it will surge like a lightening bolt through me and often some strange squeak comes out, fingers fully extended as if the energy just exploded form my core and out my extremities. Then, just as fast as it surges it disappears and there I am a woman bordering forty with this maniacal smile on my face like the joker and hair standing up like the professor from Back to The Future. Its quite a sight I am sure, and as much as it has been really hard to work with this side of myself I would rather be inside looking out and have to fix my hair then the onlookers forced to decide between the choice to ask if I am alright or back away slowly. Same with anger, although we have a bit of a deeper connection than other emotions, yea, thats right, we tight. Let me explain...or try;
I like to think my anger trigger point was when grandpa died, but looking back that is ridiculous, I was pissed at both my parents for what they put me through during the divorce but refused to take it out on them, they were in enough pain, they couldn't see it but i sure could.  When I am angry I scare people, I seem to fear nothing (not sure if that’s brave or not) and once I am angry there is no going back, I am completely incorrigible, illogical and refuse to listen. I have scared off men twice my size, not with violence of the physical kind, my verbal violence can be so articulated that I honestly think some people are scared to the core. I have shocked myself at times and thats not easy. Once I realized that I was growing into my version of the hulk I had to do something, I was starting to hate everyone and everything. 
I started replacing the empty yet extremely fucked up (for lack of a better word) threats with just simply making light of what it was that triggered me, albeit in an aggressive manner however it has proven effective in attempting to analyze what set me off and try to stop the rage fuelled rant.
I really wanted to give you an example but as I was trying to find one it proved difficult so im gonna call that progress. Anyway this venting became humorous to those around me, they all knew me so well that they would turn they’re heads and try not to laugh (ever been laughed at when your livid? its not cool, same as if are upset and someone says ‘calm down’ calm down, CALM DOWN?! like fuck off n all if you honestly believe im not trying, you think i wanna feel this way? like this is some kind of sick joke for me? pfft people!) in an attempt to not be caught in the crossfire of my verbal war. 
At first this angered me too (go figure, Hulkbitch) then one day, someone laughed and I took a step back and thought about what I had said and started laughing. Clearly my loved ones weren't laughing at my agony, but the words and descriptions i used to figure it out did tend to be funny. It takes a lot for me to get angry like that now, if I do tho, I still vent with sarcastic wit and make myself laugh to bring myself out of it. 
I think I have myself in line pretty well now, I guess I should give some history here, I was a very happy child on the outside but a ball of nerves within, my mother was extremely mentally ill (which i did not know til after her passing) and my father was a violent alcoholic. Luckily I was sheltered from the worst of what they put each other through as they separated when I was 2, but fought and fought and fought over me for nine years. My mum would insist dad never wanted me he just didn't want her to have me, said that I was never good enough in his eyes cause he wanted a boy. Dad, would point out the homeless lady pushing all her belongings in a shopping cart and say “hey kid, thats where your mum is headed, just you watch”. I know now they were just dealing in their own ways with what was happening between them but it really messed with me. 
My father, my daddy, quit drinking not long after the separation, i to this day believe that he did this not only for himself but for me, to show me that no matter what you can make changes, just gotta face the problem head on and deal with it so you can move past it. He was always a tough, vulgar, strong, stubborn, hilarious and short lil french man with an ego the size of Goliath. He taught me not to take shit from anyone if I believed in the topic at hand and to learn to turn a cold shoulder when needed. Emotions were not discussed, Im not even sure to this day if I can remember him ever saying I love you, but he didn’t have to, I know he did. 
Mum had her own ways of dealing over the years, she was all emotion, raw and uncut. She would always react first, think later, which meant she felt the need to apologize a lot.  For her mistake, for not being good enough, for not doing well enough this was so hard to watch. She would repeat the same self defeating patterns she had been doing her whole life and expecting things to change. Definition if insanity much? shitty part is back then they had no fucking idea what insanity was, nor did they care to look. Had someone just took her side and spoke for her she would still be here, if only she was honest with me about how sick she was, I may never have gotten as sick as I did. She thought she was protecting me...
This woman was the sun to my moon and I loved her more than words can ever express. She never believed me when I said it, she always said right up til the end that nobody ever loved her. I know this was not true cause I figured my dad wouldn't get so mad about stuff if he didn't care, the opposite of love is not hate, its indifference. Mum was always in and out of the hospital and it was super hush hush, I assumed she had cancer. I was petrified to lose her, so I didn’t ask questions, just waited.
The custody battle went on and on, I remember my dad pushing our 1970somthing car up the street for some reason, didn't phase me much. I just said “oh look theres my daddy, he looks mad!”. We went to Expo ‘86 in British Columbia and mum was subpoena’d to come back to the prairies for court immediately, so she had to leave her vacation just to go back and find out it was remanded.  They were both so angry all the time, I thought it was my fault...had I not been there there would be nothing left to fight about right?
Okay so divorce was finalized when I was 11...Grandma and grandpa (mums side) loved the shit out of me too, ive seen pics of gramma in the military which made sense as I grew up as to why she was so tough but she must have been retired by time I was born. They bought an old ‘70s van and converted it into beds in the back, a table and even a port a potty! They lovingly got personalized plates with my name and the number “2″ after it. They took really good care of me, always loved me and wanted what was best.
I remember around 10yrs old I realized my initials were B.S. and I was not impressed at all as not one word that came out my mouth (at that age) was BS. I was insulted and wanted it changed, plus I knew it would make mum happy if I changed my name to hers. The divorce was finalized my initials were changed to B.J....JUST in time for puberty, (woooooooo) yeah, didn't live that one down for a very long time.
My reason for bringing up my grandparents is so that you all know that aside from this somewhat bleak story thus far, I had many people that loved me, including mum and dad, they just preferred to fight about it. 
Shit, fuck, damn, I just had a memory, not a good one but I spoz thats why our brains block things out eh? I do not know how this came about, my mother was very abused growing up and it took a toll on her.  I remember mum and the  grandparents fighting, i remember gramma telling mum to get her head out of her ass and i remember trying to picture that...I was not going to be seeing them for a while til things cooled down.
Mum was sure that my grandpa had molested me, I am not going to say it didn’t happen but as far as I can recall my grandpa was the sweetest most loving man ever. anyway, mum was questioning me, yelling, badgering me and generally acting crazy i spoz, this was before I know what that looked like.  She kept asking inches from my face if he had done anything to me and i maintained that he hadn’t. Finally hours later I was tired and hungry and she was clearly still psychotic she yelled at me are you sure (for the millionth time) I finally yelled out “fine, he did it!” I had no idea what he had done, or when, cause i wasn't there i just wanted her to stop. She was making herself crazy and it broke my heart. I didn't see my grandparents again for three years. Grandpa had gone senile and was not himself, didnt remember close family members etc. When I got there, I ran in the house and we met at the doorway, me at the bottom of the entrance stairs and him at the top. I smiled, and he looked at me puzzled, then started crying, then laughing then crying. I was so glad he got to remember me. I missed him so much.
This was all before I was even a teenager. Grandpa died not long after he was put in a care home cause gramma wasn't able to care for him. His death was my first experience with such a thing, I had no way of knowing how to deal with a loss like this...so I guess I just didn’t.
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Gif not mine Having My Baby Part of Smut-entines Day KinkChallenge Pairing Dean Winchester and Lisa Kink: Pregnancy Kink Triggers: none Warning: smut with pregnant woman Summary: Dean and Lisa are having a baby and Dean couldn’t be happier and when Lisa starts to show it really is a turn on for him. Which is good since Lisa is horny all the time Dean can fill her needs, literally.
Authors Note: I decided to combine the kink challenge with spn smut appreciation day. My kink was pregnancy this was different to write, I’ve been pregnant and I so didn’t feel sexy or want it all the time like Lisa does in this fic. Also not hard core smut more like fluffy romantic love making. Hope you like it @impalaimagining
Lisa woke up in bed after a horrible nights sleep, she sat up and she tried to get up but her belly was so big she couldn’t bend. “Dean, Dean are you there” she called, “yeah sweetheart what do you need” he said. “What do I need, I am stuck in a hole again, I can’t sleep, I’m hungry all the time, I cry every four minutes, I’m horny as fuck and I want this child out of me, I’m only six months along, guess I really needed to vent” she said. She rest her head on his shoulder and he rubbed circles on her back with one hand and the other hand held hers. “I don’t know how I can help with all that other stuff but I can pull you out of the hole” he said as he helped her stand up. “I can definitely help you with the horny thing, Lisa I’m so happy your horny, I don’t know why but you being pregnant is the hottest thing in the world to me” he said. “Really, I’m happy you still find me sexy I don’t know why, in not complaining, cause I really need an orgasm” she said. “Then let’s get to it before Ben gets home from school, let me take these clothes off ” he said. Dean took the hem of her shirt in his hands, she raised her arms and he pulled it off. He growled when he saw she wasn’t wearing a bra, he went to her pants and pulled them down along with her panties. He gave her his hand and he helped her step out of her pants and panties. “Here baby let me help you lay down” he said, Dean helped Lisa sit down on the bed. He took his clothes off, down to his boxers and he crawled on the bed next to her. He helped her lay on her back, “you doing ok Lisa” he asked, “I’m good Dean” she said. He laid on his side propping his up with his elbow. He placed a gentle kiss on her lips, his tongue rubbed against her lips and she opened her mouth. His tongue explored every inch of her mouth, she did the same thing with hers. Dean ran his hands all over Lisa’s pregnant belly, up to her breasts and he put his hands on her breasts and massaged them. She moaned softly and lovingly ran her hand through his hair, her other hand found its way into his boxers and she put her hand on his cock. He grunted into her mouth, he kept massaging her breasts and she stroked his cock as he hardened in her hand. After he was hard, she patted his head, he pulled away from the kiss. “Lisa, you ok sweetheart, you wanna stop” he said, “no Dean, I want you to make love to me, I want you inside me” Lisa said. “As you wish sweetheart” Dean said, she spread her legs and he positioned himself in-between her legs. As he got into position he had to move around her belly. Once he had his position figured out and knew how to thrust without hitting her beautiful baby belly. Dean aced a soft kiss on her lips as he slid his cock into her pussy. He kissed her neck and sucked her pulse point, to soothe her while she adjusts to him filling her. “Dean, you can move baby” Lisa said, Dean thrust slowly and he watched her face for any sign of pain. When he was convinced she was ok he kissed her lips and she opened her mouth once again. Dean knew kissing during sex was Lisa’s ultimate favorite and his only goal was to make her cum, it’s what she needed. Dean thrust slowly into her, kissing her gently and slowly and softly. They had never had sex like that before, it was usually rushed, hard and fast, not intimate like that was. Dean felt like he was close, he put his hand between them and put his thumb on her clit and rubbed gentle circles on it. Dean felt her nails dig into his back and her pussy clenched around his cock as she came. He came as her pussy clenched around him, he kissed her lips one more time before he rolled over. “You ok babe” he said staring down at her lovingly, “oh Dean, I’m perfect thank you I feel amazing I love you Dean” Lisa said. “I love you too Lisa, I am glad I could help you sweetheart, I’ll give you everything I have since your giving me our beautiful daughter” he said as he ran his hand over her belly as she fell asleep with the man she loves rubbing her belly, where their unborn child grew.
Tags @niciwinchester @scarygoodfanfics @impalaimagining @jotink78 @samgirlcarmen @im-dead-inside-already @bulletscrossbowpie @icecream-and-gadreel
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trendingnewsb · 7 years
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Mother’s Day Gift Guide: Gifts For The Regular Mom, The Cool Mom & Everyone In Between
What greater holiday is there than a day that celebrates the strong, beautiful women who raised us? Go ahead, try to think of one, Ill wait. 4th of July you say? Okay. Anyway, Mothers Day really does serve as a reminder that we should be really really nice to all the moms in our lives because we too may be mothers some day and we dont want a bitchy daughter who doesnt appreciate us.  So its good karma to get them a gift, right?  A betchs mom is the most important lady in her life. Shes given us endless words of wisdom on fuckboys, shes reluctantly allowed us to borrow steal her clothes, and she always picked us up from school when we were feeling sick.  Shes molded us into the betch we are today, and for that we are forever grateful.  To show her how much you love her, were giving you a list of all our favorite brands/gift ideas that are perfect for every type of mom in your life. Welcome to the Betches Mother’s Day Gift Guide 2017.
FOR THE MOM WHO STILL GRABS CANDY FOR HERSELF AT THE CHECKOUT COUNTER
Hats off to this mom, she still answers to her sugar cravings and DGAF. Elevate her candy standards with Sugarfinas Sweetest Mom Candy Bento Box and watch it disappear within 20 minutes of her opening it. If shes into the juicing craze like any betchy mom, feel free to gift her a bottle of Pressed Juicery x Sugarfinas green juice gummy bears. Its the perfect candy she can eat while convincing herself that shes healthy AF. These are the chicest and yummiest candies ever, and Im sure this mom wont mind if you steal a few for yourselfmaybe
FOR THE ZEN AF MOM YOU CAN ALWAYS VENT TO
This mom is amazing because she has the patience to listen to us talk shit about irrelevant shit for hours and somehow make us feel 10 times better in the end. Philosophy is a fave brand of ours, not just because of their amazing products, but also because of their values. Its the wellness brand version of the mom who always sends you inspirational articles and makes sure you never leave the house without food in your stomach. To reward this woman for putting up with your crazy ass, give her the Moments of Grace boxthe perfect set of shower, fragrance, and moisturizing products.
FOR THE MOM WHO KNOWS HOW TO MAKE A HOUSE A HOME (AND WONT LET YOU EAT ON THE COUCH)
This mom might have come off as a little strict and slightly neurotic due to her strict house rules you lived under as a young betch, but you now understand it was all worth it for the image of a perfect home. Shes classy, shes elegant, and shes not afraid to tell you to fuck off when you deserve it. Giving her a Venus Et Fleur box is not just giving her clich flowers for Mothers Day, its giving her a centerpiece for her precious home. These are the most beautiful flowers and they last for an entire year. There are several colors to choose from so you can def find one to match the living room couch. PS, theyre having a pop-up shop at Saks specifically for Mothers Day, so go with your siblings and get her the most Instagrammable flowers ever.
FOR THE MOM WHO WANTS TO BE INA GARTENS BEST FRIEND
This mom spends half her life watching the Food Network and the other half begging her husband to agree to redoing the kitchen. As such, she takes great pride in all her kitchen essentials, and each time you come home theres a new blender or toaster. Although you have barely any space for a wooden spoon in your apartments kitchen and deem it acceptable to microwave water for your tea, this mom would rather be caught dead than without at least 25 different spatula options. Cuisinart is the perfect place to find the best and newest kitchen products that this mom will die over, like the QuicKettle and the PrepExpress. If you get her any of their products, I foresee massive amounts of free food in your future.
FOR THE MOM WHOS NOT AFRAID TO BLACK OUT AT FAMILY DINNERS
This mom is always invited to hang with you and your friends whenever shes in town. As a betch who can single-handedly create a party out of thin air, her Mothers Day gift needs to suit her hostess needs. Kim Crawford Wine is the perfect bottle to whip out on any given occasion, and with summer around the corner, it is officially ros season. Their website has tons of amazing recipes, including fros, sothis mom will def exploit a bottle of Kim Crawford ros for all its worth. If she also happens to be an Insta whore, were sorry in advance.
FOR THE MOM WHO GIFTED YOU YOUR WITTY SENSE OF HUMOR
This mom has passed on her good genes of having no filter and always has the entire family in tears at Thanksgiving dinner (like, the good kind). We were always afraid of what kind of backhanded bitchy comment she might make at our frenemies when we were younger, but we loved her anyway and secretly enjoyed it. If shes begging you not to get her anything this year, at least get her the perfect card from Shop Betches.
FOR THE MOM WHOS PUTTING OFF BOTOX FOR AS LONG AS POSSIBLE
This mom has had perfect skin her entire life and is now in overdrive doing everything she can to keep it that way.  Washing her face isnt just something she does a couple times a day, its now an insane obsession. To make sure this mom is getting the most out of her incessant face cleansing, get her the Soniclear brush from Michael Todd Beauty. The antimicrobial brush stays cleaner and fresher for longer, and cleans deep into your pores.  Lets be real, youre probs going to get one for yourself as well. Also, since shes probs big into blending, you should get her the Sonicblend brush to apply her makeup flawlessly.
FOR THE MOM WHO WON’T LET YOU ANYWHERE NEAR HER KITCHEN
This mom has a panic attack whenever there’s too many people in the kitchen (which for the most part means if there’s anyone in there besides her). She’s a firm believer in “a place for everything and everything in its place”, which as a betch you can only relate to on the level of your apartment’s bar cart.  Joseph Joseph has the perfect modern organizational kitchen shit that will perfectly encourage this mom’s obsessive compulsive habits, but at least the kitchen will look sleek AF so who cares. We love their Nesting Bowl Sets and their super chic Worktop Savers.
FOR THE MOM WHO ALWAYS FALLS ASLEEP WITH HER IPAD ON HER FACE
This mom can’t get enough of her Facebook feed and loves to send you videos of dogs at all hours of the night. She probably thinks she’s squinting at all her screens because she’s old, but really it’s because no ones eyes should not be staring at this shit all day. Felix Gray glasses are v trendy-looking and protect your eyes from the blue light emitted from all our electronics’ screens, so mom won’t have to fight through the headaches to continue scrolling through Insta anymore. Our offices fan favorites are the Turing and Nash frames.
FOR THE MOM WHO JUICED BEFORE IT WAS COOL
This mom has been a juice drinking yoga freak since before you were born, and she’s always looking for new ways to show the world that she’s healthier and has more of her shit together than anyone else. Daily Harvest delivers fresh soups, smoothies, chia parfaits and overnight oats to your door on your schedule. This way, mom can get her fav smoothies delivered at 3pm just in time for her to consume before her 5pm spin class. If you didn’t think eating healthy could be convenient, neither did we, but here we are.
FOR THE MOM WHO HAS EVERYTHING YOU NEVER KNEW YOU NEEDED
This mom may seem like a hoarder, but in reality she’s just a collector of random shit that will impress people. Totally different. Also, we are not ones to talk about hoarding as evidenced by our closets. Anyway, Tovolo is the perfect place to shop for this mom because while it’s super fun for us to look through all the fun kitchen gadgets they have, it will be that much more fun for her because she’ll know exactly what to do with whatever you get her. “OMG, skull ice molds?! This will be perfect for Debbie’s divorce party!”  We love their Clear Ice System and Stainless Steel Cocktail Shaker.
FOR THE MOM WHO ALWAYS LOSES SHIT
As a young mom, this one relied on her children to remind her of her dentist appointments or whenever she accidentally left the stove on. Though shes the most scatter-brained person you know, shes so lovable youve never (really) faulted her for it. Plus, her lack of having her shit together taught you how to be a proactive, multitasking betch. To make this moms life a little easier as her brain is only getting worse with age (sorry but its true), get her Tile for Mothers Day so you never have to get another phone call about her missing keys again. All she has to do is attach the little Tile to whatever it is she loses every day and connect it to her phone through Bluetooth and voil, when she needs to find either thing she can make em ring (I did not do that on purpose but I apologize).
FOR THE MOM WHO REALLY WANTS TO LOSE 3 POUNDS BUT HATES THE GYM
This mom might sound very familiar because she is all of us. She would much rather spend an hour at book club talking shit than hitting the gym, but the thought of showing up to Southampton for the summer in her current state is freaking her out. Do her a favor and buy her HUM Nutritions Skinny Bird, a natural weight loss supplement. If youre feeling really generous, they also have a Turn Back Time supplement that helps with skin cell protection. Time to pop some pills!
FOR THE BRAND NEW MOM
This mom has been MIA because she is now with child and a real human and also struggling to get more than 4 hours of sleep at night. Brighten up her day by getting her little Betch In Training a baby onesie from Shop Betches.
FOR THE MOM WHO IS ALWAYS ON THE GO
This mom has always been your business betch inspiration, as youve admired her for balancing her work and home life so well. Despite being super important at her company, she somehow found the time to proofread all your high school papers and prepped you for every job interview youve ever had.  Soap & Glory is the perfect cheeky and empowering cosmetic brand that this mom absolutely NEEDS in her life. Since shes always running from mandatory family breakfast to business meeting, get her some of our favorites like their Rushower Dry Shampoo and their Hand Food hydrating hand cream.
FOR THE MOM WHO ALWAYS KEEPS IT SIMPLE
This mom is a woman of few words, but always knows what to say. You can find her in the yoga studio in the morning and hosting a charity dinner party by night. Shes the one who taught you that doing things for others is like, important. Not one for flashy things but a lover of the arts, this mom would love a piece from Adam Marc Jewelry. Our favorite pieces are the Kim Star Choker and the Rafaeli 14k Gold Bar Necklace. Use code BETCHES20 for 20% offyour mom will never have to know you didn’t pay full price.
Read more: http://ift.tt/2qVMVNL
from Viral News HQ http://ift.tt/2r4hrCi via Viral News HQ
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Mother’s Day Gift Guide: Gifts For The Regular Mom, The Cool Mom & Everyone In Between
What greater holiday is there than a day that celebrates the strong, beautiful women who raised us? Go ahead, try to think of one, Ill wait. 4th of July you say? Okay. Anyway, Mothers Day really does serve as a reminder that we should be really really nice to all the moms in our lives because we too may be mothers some day and we dont want a bitchy daughter who doesnt appreciate us.  So its good karma to get them a gift, right?  A betchs mom is the most important lady in her life. Shes given us endless words of wisdom on fuckboys, shes reluctantly allowed us to borrow steal her clothes, and she always picked us up from school when we were feeling sick.  Shes molded us into the betch we are today, and for that we are forever grateful.  To show her how much you love her, were giving you a list of all our favorite brands/gift ideas that are perfect for every type of mom in your life. Welcome to the Betches Mother’s Day Gift Guide 2017.
FOR THE MOM WHO STILL GRABS CANDY FOR HERSELF AT THE CHECKOUT COUNTER
Hats off to this mom, she still answers to her sugar cravings and DGAF. Elevate her candy standards with Sugarfinas Sweetest Mom Candy Bento Box and watch it disappear within 20 minutes of her opening it. If shes into the juicing craze like any betchy mom, feel free to gift her a bottle of Pressed Juicery x Sugarfinas green juice gummy bears. Its the perfect candy she can eat while convincing herself that shes healthy AF. These are the chicest and yummiest candies ever, and Im sure this mom wont mind if you steal a few for yourselfmaybe
FOR THE ZEN AF MOM YOU CAN ALWAYS VENT TO
This mom is amazing because she has the patience to listen to us talk shit about irrelevant shit for hours and somehow make us feel 10 times better in the end. Philosophy is a fave brand of ours, not just because of their amazing products, but also because of their values. Its the wellness brand version of the mom who always sends you inspirational articles and makes sure you never leave the house without food in your stomach. To reward this woman for putting up with your crazy ass, give her the Moments of Grace boxthe perfect set of shower, fragrance, and moisturizing products.
FOR THE MOM WHO KNOWS HOW TO MAKE A HOUSE A HOME (AND WONT LET YOU EAT ON THE COUCH)
This mom might have come off as a little strict and slightly neurotic due to her strict house rules you lived under as a young betch, but you now understand it was all worth it for the image of a perfect home. Shes classy, shes elegant, and shes not afraid to tell you to fuck off when you deserve it. Giving her a Venus Et Fleur box is not just giving her clich flowers for Mothers Day, its giving her a centerpiece for her precious home. These are the most beautiful flowers and they last for an entire year. There are several colors to choose from so you can def find one to match the living room couch. PS, theyre having a pop-up shop at Saks specifically for Mothers Day, so go with your siblings and get her the most Instagrammable flowers ever.
FOR THE MOM WHO WANTS TO BE INA GARTENS BEST FRIEND
This mom spends half her life watching the Food Network and the other half begging her husband to agree to redoing the kitchen. As such, she takes great pride in all her kitchen essentials, and each time you come home theres a new blender or toaster. Although you have barely any space for a wooden spoon in your apartments kitchen and deem it acceptable to microwave water for your tea, this mom would rather be caught dead than without at least 25 different spatula options. Cuisinart is the perfect place to find the best and newest kitchen products that this mom will die over, like the QuicKettle and the PrepExpress. If you get her any of their products, I foresee massive amounts of free food in your future.
FOR THE MOM WHOS NOT AFRAID TO BLACK OUT AT FAMILY DINNERS
This mom is always invited to hang with you and your friends whenever shes in town. As a betch who can single-handedly create a party out of thin air, her Mothers Day gift needs to suit her hostess needs. Kim Crawford Wine is the perfect bottle to whip out on any given occasion, and with summer around the corner, it is officially ros season. Their website has tons of amazing recipes, including fros, sothis mom will def exploit a bottle of Kim Crawford ros for all its worth. If she also happens to be an Insta whore, were sorry in advance.
FOR THE MOM WHO GIFTED YOU YOUR WITTY SENSE OF HUMOR
This mom has passed on her good genes of having no filter and always has the entire family in tears at Thanksgiving dinner (like, the good kind). We were always afraid of what kind of backhanded bitchy comment she might make at our frenemies when we were younger, but we loved her anyway and secretly enjoyed it. If shes begging you not to get her anything this year, at least get her the perfect card from Shop Betches.
FOR THE MOM WHOS PUTTING OFF BOTOX FOR AS LONG AS POSSIBLE
This mom has had perfect skin her entire life and is now in overdrive doing everything she can to keep it that way.  Washing her face isnt just something she does a couple times a day, its now an insane obsession. To make sure this mom is getting the most out of her incessant face cleansing, get her the Soniclear brush from Michael Todd Beauty. The antimicrobial brush stays cleaner and fresher for longer, and cleans deep into your pores.  Lets be real, youre probs going to get one for yourself as well. Also, since shes probs big into blending, you should get her the Sonicblend brush to apply her makeup flawlessly.
FOR THE MOM WHO WON’T LET YOU ANYWHERE NEAR HER KITCHEN
This mom has a panic attack whenever there’s too many people in the kitchen (which for the most part means if there’s anyone in there besides her). She’s a firm believer in “a place for everything and everything in its place”, which as a betch you can only relate to on the level of your apartment’s bar cart.  Joseph Joseph has the perfect modern organizational kitchen shit that will perfectly encourage this mom’s obsessive compulsive habits, but at least the kitchen will look sleek AF so who cares. We love their Nesting Bowl Sets and their super chic Worktop Savers.
FOR THE MOM WHO ALWAYS FALLS ASLEEP WITH HER IPAD ON HER FACE
This mom can’t get enough of her Facebook feed and loves to send you videos of dogs at all hours of the night. She probably thinks she’s squinting at all her screens because she’s old, but really it’s because no ones eyes should not be staring at this shit all day. Felix Gray glasses are v trendy-looking and protect your eyes from the blue light emitted from all our electronics’ screens, so mom won’t have to fight through the headaches to continue scrolling through Insta anymore. Our offices fan favorites are the Turing and Nash frames.
FOR THE MOM WHO JUICED BEFORE IT WAS COOL
This mom has been a juice drinking yoga freak since before you were born, and she’s always looking for new ways to show the world that she’s healthier and has more of her shit together than anyone else. Daily Harvest delivers fresh soups, smoothies, chia parfaits and overnight oats to your door on your schedule. This way, mom can get her fav smoothies delivered at 3pm just in time for her to consume before her 5pm spin class. If you didn’t think eating healthy could be convenient, neither did we, but here we are.
FOR THE MOM WHO HAS EVERYTHING YOU NEVER KNEW YOU NEEDED
This mom may seem like a hoarder, but in reality she’s just a collector of random shit that will impress people. Totally different. Also, we are not ones to talk about hoarding as evidenced by our closets. Anyway, Tovolo is the perfect place to shop for this mom because while it’s super fun for us to look through all the fun kitchen gadgets they have, it will be that much more fun for her because she’ll know exactly what to do with whatever you get her. “OMG, skull ice molds?! This will be perfect for Debbie’s divorce party!”  We love their Clear Ice System and Stainless Steel Cocktail Shaker.
FOR THE MOM WHO ALWAYS LOSES SHIT
As a young mom, this one relied on her children to remind her of her dentist appointments or whenever she accidentally left the stove on. Though shes the most scatter-brained person you know, shes so lovable youve never (really) faulted her for it. Plus, her lack of having her shit together taught you how to be a proactive, multitasking betch. To make this moms life a little easier as her brain is only getting worse with age (sorry but its true), get her Tile for Mothers Day so you never have to get another phone call about her missing keys again. All she has to do is attach the little Tile to whatever it is she loses every day and connect it to her phone through Bluetooth and voil, when she needs to find either thing she can make em ring (I did not do that on purpose but I apologize).
FOR THE MOM WHO REALLY WANTS TO LOSE 3 POUNDS BUT HATES THE GYM
This mom might sound very familiar because she is all of us. She would much rather spend an hour at book club talking shit than hitting the gym, but the thought of showing up to Southampton for the summer in her current state is freaking her out. Do her a favor and buy her HUM Nutritions Skinny Bird, a natural weight loss supplement. If youre feeling really generous, they also have a Turn Back Time supplement that helps with skin cell protection. Time to pop some pills!
FOR THE BRAND NEW MOM
This mom has been MIA because she is now with child and a real human and also struggling to get more than 4 hours of sleep at night. Brighten up her day by getting her little Betch In Training a baby onesie from Shop Betches.
FOR THE MOM WHO IS ALWAYS ON THE GO
This mom has always been your business betch inspiration, as youve admired her for balancing her work and home life so well. Despite being super important at her company, she somehow found the time to proofread all your high school papers and prepped you for every job interview youve ever had.  Soap & Glory is the perfect cheeky and empowering cosmetic brand that this mom absolutely NEEDS in her life. Since shes always running from mandatory family breakfast to business meeting, get her some of our favorites like their Rushower Dry Shampoo and their Hand Food hydrating hand cream.
FOR THE MOM WHO ALWAYS KEEPS IT SIMPLE
This mom is a woman of few words, but always knows what to say. You can find her in the yoga studio in the morning and hosting a charity dinner party by night. Shes the one who taught you that doing things for others is like, important. Not one for flashy things but a lover of the arts, this mom would love a piece from Adam Marc Jewelry. Our favorite pieces are the Kim Star Choker and the Rafaeli 14k Gold Bar Necklace. Use code BETCHES20 for 20% offyour mom will never have to know you didn’t pay full price.
Read more: http://ift.tt/2qVMVNL
from Viral News HQ http://ift.tt/2r4hrCi via Viral News HQ
0 notes