OKAY, SO, I DON'T THINK ANYONE HAS ASKED THIS BUT- HCS of proposing to the yjs? Like, would they propose or would reader propose. Also, how they would do it dhhshdhan

lottie: FOR SUREEEE she would be the one proposing. i think she'd try sooo hard to be subtle, but you know in an instant because she's so fucking nervous 😭 also didn't hide the ring that well...it'd be on a trip to greece - idk the first thing that came to mind was a little sunset picnic by the beach near ur hotel, little makeout session which turns into her getting emotional and pulling out the ring. she'd go on a monologue for like 10 minutes about how lucky she is to have met you and be with you and wake up every day to kiss you :( I feel like she'd just love a quaint little wedding with all your guys' friends and some family. doesn't have to be huge but if that's something you want, shes more than happy to oblige.

jackie: YOU WOULD! her ass would be dropping hints that she's ready for marriage and would get SO excited when you make up the worst lie when you're going with shauna to go ring shopping LMFAO. you have to wait until she forgets about it because she's on edge Every Day. i think she'd LOVE the attention if you do it in public... telling her you wanna go on a simple walk and she starts to realize you're taking her to where you guys went on your first date :( proposing to her at the exact table you sat at too 😭😭 ohh she'd be a mess. it'd take her like 5 mins to stop crying and say yes.

shauna: she would!!!!! this is probably cliche and corny as hell but i can't stop thinking about her saying she bought you a book because it reminds her of you and when you open it, inside is a poem she wrote about how she feels about you :( she includes lines from her favorite books and at the end of poem is "please say yes." you're confused but she tells you to flip to the last page and there's a ring. she's holding her breath for what seems like forever until you say yes and shes so happy :(( tbh i can see her just wanting to get married secretly and the girls finding out about it when they see that huge ass ring she got you.

nat: you'd propose. but i could also see her being kind of upset she can't afford an actual ring for you so she gets you like a ring from one of those quarter machines or some shit 😖😭 but its soo sweeet. she actually pours her little heart out and maybe cries a little...(she'll kill u if u mention this to anyone) but as for you, a simple dinner proposal is just fine. doesn't even have to be fancy - it could be a pizza shop you two frequent a lot and she'd be content. you'd do it in such a cheesy (no pun intended) way tho 😭 "accidentally" dropping your fork and asking her to pick it up for you and when she's bent down, that's where you place the ring on her plate. she scoffs but she's so enamored >__< will also flaunt that ring like there's no tomorrow!!!!

taissa: she would :P she told you very early on in ur relationship that you shouldn't even THINK about proposing because she's gonna be the one to do it. im such a sucker for halloween/christmas themed proposals so im imagining her doing it with christmas lights and ur too busy staring at how pretty she looks to notice the letters spelling out something when you help her put them up. thinking of the word "you" not lighting up properly so it just spells out "will marry me?" and you're like HUH!!!!! but ofc you say yes, and she gets you the most jaw-droppingly gorgeous ring ever that matches with a necklace she bought for herself :(

van: they would!!!! im obsessed with the idea of them doing it in a movie theater 😭 using their connections to have it display "y/n, will you marry me?" during the end credits of a movie you went to go see. and you HATE staying for the credits, so it takes a Lot of begging from van to get you to sit ur ass back down. the lights turning into a warm red color and van's VIBRATING beside you with a huge grin on their face as their message pops up. Trust that the ring box would be themed to fit your guys' favorite movie like the little nerd they are.

misty: oh, she would...if it was acceptable, she would've proposed one week into your relationship. caligula would 100% be involved. when you arrive at misty's house, caligula is carrying a note in her beak telling you to meet misty at the park. you walk around with her for a while and feed the ducks with her until she takes you by this totally not suspicious guy who's playing romantic songs on his guitar, which definitely sounds like ur favorite song....she gets down on her knees dramatically before proposing 😭

I think in general people are too impressed by "paradoxes" and "unintuitive truths" and stuff from science and mathematics, e.g. Gödel's incompleteness theorems, the Banach-Tarski paradox, quantum mechanics...

This is part of my whole "people believe too much" thing. People commit themselves to too many strong general principles and too many implications between ideas. The average person should be more "passively skeptical". That is to say, they don't need to go out of their way to doubt or debunk things, they should just in general take a more "I dunno" stance towards the world; they should be more inclined by default to suspend judgement on things, including on the truth per se of ideas that they have decided to adopt as working best-guesses at the truth.

Coming at this the other way: in practice, life requires us to commit to all kinds of beliefs in order to figure out what to do in various circumstances. But I feel like a vastly underrated observation is that you don't have to really believe these commitments in any deep sense. You can be more casual, more willing to say "this seems like the most likely thing at the moment, so I'll go with it for now, but idk if it's really true". This is more of a posture towards ideas than a proposition in itself. Most people are willing to entertain the concept of doubt, but it's almost about... how fluidly you entertain it? Anyway, I think this posture of casual skepticism has many epistemic benefits.

The point I was making about "paradoxes" and so on, though, is like... ok, it was reasonable based on what was known about physics in the 19th century to adopt this view of the world as made up of little billiard balls with definite positions and momenta and all that, progressing according to clockwork rules. I think if I had been alive then, I too would have adopted that as my working best guess about how the world is. But I don't think I would've have been that committed to it. I mean it's purely an empirical thing, right—"huh, sure looks like the world is made up of little billiard balls progressing according to clockwork rules". And anyway, I don't really think any of the concrete claims of quantum mechanics are that unintuitive or philosophically troubling or whatever, unless you start out weirdly committed to this billiard ball idea. If you had a more casual stance towards it to begin with, I don't think QM would have been such a shock.

I mean, I guess I do think QM was (probably) justifiably surprising, but not for the reasons most people think that. Not because of its "deeper philosophical implications" or whatever, which again I think are not that big a deal. Just for the reason that the billiard ball idea worked really well for a long time and seemed to have a lot of success and (potential) explanatory power, so seeing it overturned, if you're a specialist familiar with the area, seems like very reasonable cause for a "whoa moment". But anyway, in light of this, I'm tempted to call it "surprising in a mundane way" rather than surprising in a deep way. And I guess my further feeling is that with a sufficiently causally skeptical outlook, there isn't very much that actually should be surprising in a deep way. Most surprising stuff should just be like "oh huh".

So anyway the fact that people keep getting deeply surprised at these scientific revelations suggests to me that maybe they have too many commitments.

✨Chris Sturniolo Headcanons✨

For Black Girls✊🏽✊🏾✊🏿

💋 Chris loves black girls

I’m sorry but in my head Chris prefers black girls. Like Atlanta Georgia black girls… thick, dark, dressed to the nines, hair done, acrylic nails 💅🏽💅🏾💅🏿absolute fucking queens. Like I don’t describe Y/N in any way but best believe if it’s a Chris fic she’s black to me.

💋 He sees fucking hates racists

This doesn’t actually need to be said but I figured We’d get this out of the way first. Chris definitely listens to you when you talk about race issues so he knows all about micro aggressions. He always notices them and stands up for you every time. “Baby, if anyone says that shit to you again I’m gonna catch an assault charge!”

💋 He owns silk sheets

This man most definitely would buy a full set of silk sheets after you sleep over his house for the first time and he notices you brought your own satin/silk pillowcase. He doesn’t realize it’s for your hair until he surprises you with them the next time you sleep over and you tell him. “Oh, I just thought you were being bougie.” Then he buys more sets of them because he decides to throw away all his cotton sheets.

💋 He learns your hair care routine

Chris is the only white person you trust to touch your hair. He makes taking care of your hair into a really loving and intimate experience. If you’re in the bath he adds epsom salts, sets up candles, and does a bunch of stuff to set the mood. “You have any music requests, Mama? If not I’m probably just gonna put on the sexy time playlist.” He sits out side of the bath and takes his time washing and conditioning your hair making sure to detangle and section it the way you taught him. He does the same thing when you’re in the shower except he stops occasionally to pull you close and feel you up. “Come here, Baby. You’re so fuckin’ pretty and you smell so nice and clean. I just can’t resist.”

💋 He sits with you when you’re getting your hair braided and brings you snacks

Before your appointment he packs you a lunch bag full of snacks for the both of you because of course he’s coming with you. “Alright, Baby, we’ve got Doritos, McDonald’s chicken nuggets, and a shit ton of candy. We’re all set to go.” If you think he’s not gonna come when you’re gonna be in the chair unable to get away from his yapping you are sorely mistaken. He’s always keeping everyone entertained and happy. “What’s up ladies! You have any tea for me today.” It’s just him feeding you snacks and having silly conversations with you and the person doing your hair. If you ever show up to your appointment without him everyone misses him.

💋 He pays for your acrylics

He insists on giving you the money every two weeks because he’s just “helping to keep his princess feeling pretty” He also likes to help you figure out designs and themes nails. He sends you random texts with nail inspo all the time. “I know a zoo theme seems extra, but let me cook, Mama!” I’m certain that he makes you get a C for Chris on one of your nails every time you get new set. This probably isn’t exclusive to black girls but like as a black person who gets their nails done I like to go all out on the designs and shit gets expensive.

💋 You convince him to wear a durag

He only agrees to do it one time in the house. You use the situation to teach him its use and significance in black hair care. It takes him a few tries and you have to demonstrate it a lot but eventually he is able to put it on correctly and he looks super cute. Not cute in a “this is a good look for you” kind of way, but in an aww “the little white boy is engaging in cultural appreciation” type of way. “I think if anyone saw me like this I would get cancelled.”

Taglist

Masterlist

Idk if people put their tag lists on headcanon posts??? Pls advise

@daddyslilchickenfingers2 @mrsmiagreer @rafecameronsbitch @lovergirl4387 @gdsvhtwa @ashley9282828 @j-worlds-blog @stephanienwf @achrisgirly @draculaura123 @abbypost @cind2224 @crazychrisl0v3r @ryli3sworld @bkwrld @chrattstromboli @pinkishpearls @pepsienthusiasts @stunza @sturnssmuts @angelic-sturniolos111 @69isabella69 @maryx2xx @sturniolo04 @bigbeefybitch @klaus223492 @r93339 @sturnzsblog @spotconlon55 @robins-scoop @junovrsmp4 @sturnlover4eva @blahbel668 @lilahnowheretobefound @luxy-nyx @tuffsturns @m0r94n @sturnstvs @pepsicolapussy333 @maddyslifesstuff @dogblof @honeymoonxxz @xplr-sturns-e-m @hayhjelmstad15

I don’t have like a ton to say about this but I have mixed feelings- also spoilers ✨

I like Crystal I really do but at times her dialogue bothered me and some of her behavior was kind of obnoxious to me- like at times when she started aggressively inserting herself into situations and just kind of made it about her? Like in episode seven (though this happened many other times too) where she was having a total fit about not going to hell when it’s clearly for her own good and not about her no matter how much she cares? and I totally understand that this is her being written as an immature teenager who hasn’t been dead or a teen for 30-100 years but as a teenager this sort of selfish immature writing kind of gives me icky feelings because I know so many people who are mostly emotionally intelligent not just raging all the time.- and I mean that for a lot of teenagers and teen girls in writing, to make them tough and likable they are made volitile and annoying which to me is not likable (my opinion, I just don’t like the trope that’s not what I’m talking about right now anyway-) I do think she had good development and I liked her a lot better by the end, some people on other forums were saying that her actress was weaker than the rest of the cast and I don’t really know about that? I think maybe she was artificial at times but I’m blaming that on the writing. I also didn’t like her dialogue about her “crazy demon ex” either, it felt very forced? -Not her emotions about the whole mind cage thing I get that but just all of the “UGH WHY ARE THEY SO FUCKING NOSY IM JUST TRYING TO GET OVER MY STUPID STUPID CRAZY ABUSIVE STALKER DEMON EX BOYFRIEND UGHHH ILL DOUBLE KILL THOSE BOYS IF ITS TGE LAST THING I DO” that felt out of place to me- Lastly I get that this is also an aspect of her teenager-ness but I didn’t like the amount she cursed? I have no qualms with cursing but it felt to me like when little kids and middle schoolers start cursing where they just explosively yell fuck when like literally nothing warranting that kind of expletive has happened? She curses too often it makes her sound really stupid? Like the ep 7 “take me to hell I won’t die” thing, she was screaming at Charles who was being pretty reasonable like “fuck that I’m going he’s my fucking friend too fine then fuck it- fuck you ill find another way to get to hell” like yes she was emotional but that isn’t what teenagers sound like guys?

idk- I’d love to hear what other people think and to be clear I do like her I just focused on the negative- I guess it’s a human thing. She had lots of strong points just I ending up not liking how much she was on screen, this isn’t really about you? It’s about the dead boy detective? Give me more ghosts or Edwin or Charles or Jenny or Niko or Mr walrus please? They were fun I like them? I just felt like there were times where she was over shadowing Edwin and Charles and they are what’s actually important to the show? I think I’d like her more in smaller doses- I felt like I spent too much time having to stop and be like “girl step back this is not about you, you are not the star right now”

and to the argument of her actress being inexperienced or over acting or just not great- I have no specific feelings on this but like the other main cast had for the most part very little screen acting experience and were Fantastic so i don’t know what to feel in that area? so yes, i think crystal is an interesting character and i think she grew on me and developed in the season but i also definitely think that she’s annoying and I’m conflicted because i don’t want to not like her-..

what are your thoughts? Id love to hear different perspectives but please be nice to me because I’ll probably delete this and cry (unless that was your goal, then carry on)

that was all like super ramble-y sorry- but I hope I communicated semi accurately! Thank you

I'm a diff anon, but:

"Okay, but I don't understand why this ended up with BTS being dragged into a mess that has nothing to do with them in the first place? This started with the lady from the coup, right?"

Yes. In short, HYBE ordered an audit on ADOR because they found proof that MHJ and a man planned to make ADOR a separate company, Mhj and the man talked with shareholders to try to get them to back them(ador) up so they can leave hybe. This is how it started and then later on a bunch of other stuff came out.. Reddit has master posts of this, you can find them if you want to read more about it

So after the news came out about the audit, she started responding to it, she claimed hybe copied newjeans to make Illit, she claimed that she was promised to debut hybe's first gg but they debuted le sserafim first instead, she implied that she was in a slave contract. So she namedropped 2 groups first. And then somehow some article reported that she went to a shaman to discuss BTS' enlistment and when they would go and so the shaman could make sure they really go? The last part is a bit confusing because idk how a shaman could make them go but yeah. And that's how BTS got into the picture. She later basically admitted this by rambling about how this shaman is just a friend of hers who just happens to be a shaman.

"Why did BTS end up being the bad guys again?"

Because nothing unites kpop fans more than hating on bts. BTS genuinely didn't do anything, kpop fans just started hating on them for no reason and they kept making tweets about "xy group disbanded because of hybe"

"It makes sense that BigHit decided to hire an external legal team instead of using HYBE's or even their own agency's."

In my understanding, they hired this external legal team or set up this law firm to deal with the hate campaign against Bts. There are a lot of conspiracy theories going around rn, about BTS/hybe being in a cult and K-pop fans being kpop fans and bringing up everything they can about bts' past. So I think this second legal team is just for the BTS issue so that the hybe legal team can fully focus on bringing mhj to court. Again, this is just how I interpreted it.

Hello, anon. Thanks you as well for providing a bit more context on everything that's going on. If you don't mind, I have a few things to comment on regarding what you said, and also, I have a couple of questions that I hope won't offend anyone:

1. Regarding the accusations made by that woman about copying NJ: why did she say that? I don't know much about that group, but a girl group in K-pop isn't something new, right? The concept isn’t that… new, I think? And their sound isn't so... unique? From what little I've heard and some comparisons I've seen. Is the new group exactly the same, or what? Does NJ have something unique that can be easily identifiable if someone copies it? And that’s why she said that?

2. She was promised that she would debut the company's first girl group: okay, they didn't do it, and? From what little or much I've read about what this woman has said, I've concluded that she's a tantrum-throwing and pretentious person who cries when she doesn't get what she wants. You know who she reminds me of? Veruca, the character from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.

3. The shaman thing is complete madness and it’s probably the comedic contribution to all of this😭.

4. The obsession of Kpoppies with BTS should be studied. I can bet that not even the biggest stan in the fandom is as obsessed with them as Kpoppies are. If only they put as much effort into supporting their favorites as they do into hating BTS, they would help them rise above the mediocrity that many are in. At least in terms of sales, streaming, charts, etc., with the quality of content they put out, there's not much they can do.

5. Ahhhh, your explanation about the external legal team makes sense, but at the same time, I wonder if BigHit does have its own legal team, and if it doesn't, I wonder why.

Genuine question about poly (I've been thinking about whether it's something I'd want to try, with me being ace it's probably my best option for finding a partner-) how do you compromise when it comes to bigger life decisions? Unless you're in a triad or a bigger sort of "closed circle" polycule, and you compromise among each other (which also seems more difficult tbh), to me it seems like poly relationships are like a web that contains many many people because you're dating three people, they're dating a few other people, and so on. So either you have primary relationships where you prioritize each other and don't mind leaving the other ones behind (which seems a bit idk. I would not be the primary relationship because I won't have sex and ace men are very rare from the surveys I've seen. A lifetime of being in the periphery doesn't seem desireable to me.) Or you act as an individual agent and basically have to break up with everyone if you ever want to move which seems horrific and like a massive commitment. I guess you could do long distance but I don't see long distance working if your partner has other partners they can interact with normally..

I mean. There's no one answer here. You're making a lot of assumptions (which may be but are not always true) so let's break this down bit my bit. Buckle up 💺we got stuff to discuss

But if you want a TL;DR: How do you make that decision in a monog relationship if Partner A wants to leave but Partner B has family here? Well, there's a lot of discussion and someone has to compromise on something. How it shakes out will depend on the people and the specific situation.

"the poly web🕸️" While a polycule can spiral into something huge via the "everyone has three partners" principle, its also possible it stays pretty small. Not everyone in a polycule will want to date someone else, not everyone who wants to date someone else will be able to find someone else to date, etc etc. Small polycules are common in practice.

"aces ♠️won't be the 'primary partner'" I respect you hedging your expectations and understand the reasoning there, but the poly community is pretty open to weird relationship dynamics. You could be the "primary" and your partner could have a couple other relationships to get sexual needs met. You could join an ace polycule. Your partner could have you and one other person and see you both as equal.

"Moving💼 means taking or leaving everyone -- or prioritizing" I... I guess it could? But if you know you're wanting to move far away, you're probably discussing that quite a while in advance, and then only dating people who are okay with things being short term or moving with you. Or a lot of poly relationships are already long distance, so one person moving makes very little difference! There's a lot of options there, which leads to point 4

"Long distance✈️ can't work if your partner has local partners" LDRs in poly relationships are common. I honestly see it as easier because you can have your physical needs met by someone else

"A lifetime of being in the periphery🥈" you're never locked down. If you're not getting what you need from ANY relationship, I hope you're negotiating about it or leaving. If being poly only works for you if you're the primary, but your partner can fuck whoever, you wouldn't be the first. Even if you don't want to impose those rules, there are options, and your partner should be working to make you happy. It can be a hell of a learning curve sometimes, I admit, but you can find a weird way of being that works for everyone. Or you can leave! Or they could leave you for unrelated reasons! Or maybe they go to prison for embezzlement and that sort of ends the relationship for you! All sorts of shit could come up.

"this is a poly problem" Bestie. Do you know how many movies have been made on the premise of "my spouse got a job offer far away but I don't want to move"? This is something that could happen in any relationship. I'm not saying having other people involved wouldn't be a variable in the equation, but your relationship with your partner is no different from a monogamous one in this aspect. How that decision gets made is the same to me as how it would get made in a monog relationship where one person has family they don't want to leave. Maybe you do split up, maybe you try long distance, maybe partner A decides not to move, maybe partner B decides they're willing to move with them after all (and then subsequent partners make the same choice). And its not perfect in any of these options, in fact it probably really fucking sucks. But life is messy. This shit happens.

And like, you don't have to try polyamory. There are asexual people out there you could meet and love. There are allosexual people out there who would be willing to give that up to be with you. You could do an open relationship situation where your partner doesn't "date" anyone else, but can still sleep around. Or you can join an asexual polycule!

So how do major life choices get decided in a polycule? The same way major life decisions get made anywhere. Hopefully, everyone says their peace and gets to weigh in. Hopefully the life goals align. Failing that, hopefully there's a compromise that's acceptable to everyone, but maybe there isn't and it forces a break up (or 6). Maybe some break up but not everyone, like so:

Or some of the relationships turn into long distance or whatever. Man there's too many variables. Some people view things as hierarchical and some don't. Some people don't but functionally have only been dating one person for 4 months so they're easier to leave -- or know they cannot live with another person because they're too disorganized so going long distance is fine. You don't know until you're there. I'm losing the thread, but you know what I'm saying.

i feel like. theres designing a character with certain themes and motifs in mind, and then theres making a gijinka for the water bottle on my nightstand

2024 reads / storygraph

Those Beyond The Wall

sequel/companion to The Space Between Worlds, set a decade later

character-focused sci-fi set in an area divided in two, the rich protected city on one side and everyone else in the post-apocalyptic desert

follows a woman who works under the Emperor in Ashtown, keeping the peace

when mangled bodies start showing up with seemingly no murderer, she’s tasked with finding the cause, and finds out that it’s the result of corruption spanning both cities and multiple worlds

explores oppression and messy revolution, police violence and apartheid

bi & polyamorous MC

Tomorrow/later today brings good news for people who like The Silt Verses and 8 minute long narrative folk songs

Hate it when I see people say shit like "the Violet paradox mons are so stupid and lame, they're all just robots!" like uhmmmmm yea they are and it OWNS ok. blasts you with my beam attack

ridi im sorry i need to rant and i think youll get it 😭 like not to be a bitch but this fandom kinda going off the rails and annoying the shit out of me https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTRbYASpf/ everybody in the comments unironically loving it,,, i mean wtvr ship who you want but its kinda getting delusional like ppl are just operating on thin air and pretty fancasts atp and i do Not understand or emotionally connect with any of it. at least w wolfstar theres so much material and foundation to explore but what is all the rest of this?? just hot celebrity fancasts and crack. to be fair part of me respects taking a terfs canon material and making everybody gay but the way it seems to be so oversaturating fics and the fandom that characters dont even feel like their original selves .. atp its all just surface level OCs

hello! yes! i'll be honest talking about things like this always make me a little nervous, and i feel obligated to preface anything i say with a disclaimer that none of it really matters, nothing i say matters, and you should do what you like, because--who cares. i am not an authority on--anything, frankly. my opinion holds no more weight than the next guy's, and all i'm doing here is giving it, so. essentially what im saying is--people are perfectly entitled to disagree with me, but people are not entitled to be mean to me about it xx

having said that. it is my personal opinion that s x barty is one of the worst fucking things i have ever heard lol. who even is barty who is that guy. why would s be interested in him at all. i do not understand it it does not make sense to me. from where are we sourcing the character traits and personality that we are giving barty that would ever endear sirius to him, because it objectively cannot be canon.

overall i do not get the new interest in barty + evan + pandora (+ regulus, but we won't go there)...at all, other than guessing that people were bored with the marauders and wanted a new version of them (and new celebrities to fancast) while simultaneously changing next to nothing about them other than superimposing them onto the first slytherin side characters they could rustle up. i expect ive become a bit of a broken record in regards to my dislike of the popular meow-meow-ification + complete absolution of regulus as a character in order to make him a loveable oc (just as i think erasing all the negative traits that r/s have in order to make them more likeable is just as boring), and all of that applies to those other guys as well (with the slight difference that they are, somehow, even less interesting and significant than regulus in canon), so i won't get into that too much. but i think what you say about having no emotional connection to any of it is exactly right lol--it is a sort of shift? i guess? in the fandom that is simply of no interest to me. they are characters that i just have no emotional investment in and admittedly struggle a little to understand why other people do. i am emotionally invested in, like, five characters overall (and even out of those--there's only two i'm really here for innit xx) and i personally cannot extend that investment to a creepy little side character who is mentioned maybe twice in the entire series.

and that is okay! i do not need to understand it. i don't want to say it annoys me because honestly--i don't go there, its nothing to do with me. if i dont like it i just wont interact with it, and the fact that it doesn't interest me has no bearing on what other people are into or want to do, and i couldn't give less of a shit what people do with the canon material, which is largely garbage anyway. take the bits you want from it, play around with those and ignore the rest. in that respect we are all doing exactly the same thing. but yeah i think s x barty is genuinely awful lol. hate it. very terrible. he's already got a loser werewolf boyfriend and he loves him so so much. leave him alone.

well most importantly to me, the panel art of the latest upd8 was absolutely spectacular!!!!

today i rented a guitar.

damn. i really thought i already had the "youre probably never going to see any of your uni friends again after you move out this really and truly is the end of the most vibrant and healthy irl social life youve ever had. and likely will ever have again" breakdown done and shelved but i spent today hanging out with a few friends from my course who are leaving this week to say goodbye and i dont. know how to process it completely. im trying to make the most of everything while im still here but every interaction feels so bittersweet it's genuinely gnawing at me

its so weird to read some of my old fics (do NOT do it but i'm just being hypothetical rn) and reading it. like who even was this person?? i completely was in a haze back in 2020. i literally was posting 3 chapters a day. A DAY. what in the WORLD was that shit.

anyway i remembered some STUPID sappy shit and i didnt remember if i'd put it into a fic or not BUT I FOUND IT.

She and Hope had been dating in secret for months anyway, and any attempt to go talk to Ryan only filed her disposition of displeasure upon knowing that she couldn’t tell anyone, Molly especially, it destroyed herself mentally. They couldn’t really go anywhere near the school, always having to lie to everyone about having projects together when Molly wasn’t around them. It’d consisted with 9 PM - 2 AM intervals of being able to actually see each other. Hope would sneak through her small bedroom window with a portable record player and whatever she had gotten from the vintage record store downtown, and Amy would always fall asleep around eleven because of her internal clock. She would always wake up to find a single sticky note stuck on the edge of her desk whenever she woke up to her alarm the next morning. One of them, Amy still had tucked inside of her phone case, a heavily detailed human heart, with blue and red ink sketched onto a neon pink sticky note, there was a caption that headed the small paper reading the phrase over every now and again makes her almost melt every time. “You have my heart.”

yeah idk why the fuck but i thought of this fucking idea again today and i was like "omg did i ever put that heart note thing in a fic???" yeah you fucking did.

all that to say ME AND WHO???? imagine. thats so fucking.... RAHHHH.