touch // aventurine

i think he would be like a cat. come to you for affection? not a chance in hell. but ok..... you know maybe lean his head on your shoulder while you're reading on the couch. maybe you shift to accommodate him, drape an arm across his shoulders, pull him in, almost absently. no sudden movements, you'll scare him off. and if you're just gentle enough, he might let you. might remain where he is, head on your shoulder, unmoving but for the rise and fall of his breathing. no searching hands, no reaching — but you can stroke his hair, softly, occasionally. twirl it around your finger idly, no tugging, not too much. it'll make him smile, on a good day, but only when you're not looking.

today, he just sighs. you don't ask how he is — some things can't be put into words, and that's not what his are for — but you can rest your head atop his, breathe along with him, arm around his shoulders firm and gentle. if you're attentive, you'll feel the way he slowly, reluctantly lets go of the tension in his body— the coil in the base of his skull, the taut line drawing his shoulders up imperceptibly. he'll learn to melt in your hands, one day, but you'll have to earn it. for now, this is enough. maybe you melt first, forget what you were paying attention to initially, feel the warm weight of him against your frame, the scent of him, the ebb and flow of his breath, slowing to match yours; his pulse, slowing to match yours. he's let you this close, he might fall asleep on you. if you notice, you'll put what you're looking at away and twine the fingers of your other hand with his. he won't know how to ask for it, but if he hasn't completely drifted off, he'll squeeze your hand, gently. sleep, you'll whisper, i'll be here. and he won't reply, but you'll feel him press closer, soften against the shape of you, drift away. you watch him for a moment, watch the fan of his light lashes against his cheek, and how his eyes flick beneath his lids with unseen dreams. if you fall asleep with him, you might catch him as you're waking, an uncharacteristic softness in his features, before he notices you've noticed. maybe if the time is right, he won't care that you have. but you won't speak of it. you'll both wake, and he'll interrupt the moment, eventually, rise from the couch, put the mask back on, but the sweetness of it will linger, barely perceptible, only to you.

i'm very picky about tv shows, but my pickiness has only an incidental relationship to whether or not a show is "good". it needs to scratch a particular itch in my brain at the right moment. do i know what the right moment is? no. do i know what the itch is? also no. i can be relied upon to get instantly bored of 85% of tv shows and then turn the remaining 15% into a central facet of my personality for 3-5 business months and even i am incapable of predicting which one it'll be ahead of time.

literally obsessed with the design of blobjects

Love seeing everyone’s varying depictions of the Magnus Protocol gang but my drawing skills are BUSTED so even though I can’t draw her atm just know that my headcanon of Alice is this specific photo of Susan Kare lmao

you know what fuck it we’re doing dadstarion

I actually enjoy celebs being here. You only thrive if you don't try.

Madonna is on here. Her posts get like, 60 notes. Is she trying to make it anything more than a feed/extension of her Insta, though? Nah. She's just here. You want to see a Madonna thing? You can find it.

Neil shares thoughts and answers questions when the whim takes him, billions-deep ask box.

Ryan Reynolds will thrive if he's just...that guy reblogging gifsets of himself like "haha you guys are creative".

Not to be cringe on main but you just have to be...not a glossy product of yourself, to maintain some kind of comfortable nook and easy back-and-forth with the userbase. When it works for the people it works for, it's quite enjoyable for everyone involved.

Like we've all known for years Hozier is SOMEWHERE around here, just reblogging pictures of moss. You go, you moss-collecting cryptid man.

fucking hate it when the stuff everybody says "actually works" does actually work.

hate exercising and realizing i've let go of a lot of anxiety and anger because i've overturned my fight-or-flight response.

hate eating right and eating enough and eating 3 times a day and realizing i'm less anxious and i have more energy

hate journaling in my stupid notebook with my stupid bic ballpoint and realizing that i've actually started healing about something once i'm able to externalize it

hate forgiving myself hate complimenting myself more often hate treating myself with kindness hate taking a gratitude inventory hate having patience hate talking to myself gently

hate turning my little face up to the sun and taking deep breaths and looking at nature and grounding myself and realizing that i feel less burdened and more hopeful, more actually-here, that i am able to see the good sides of myself more clearly, that i am able to see not only how far i have to grow - but also how much growth i have already done & how much of my life i truly fill with light and laughter and love

horrible horrible horrible. hate it but i'm gonna do it tho

best friend with social anxiety

slipping through my fingers

let her go

POV: your master is talking with higher beings again

Gosh it would be so funny if this keeps happening especially mid conversation

wanted to scribble a couple of my favorite moments from the "Just So" song demo <3

so much happened in this whole episode but i’m still on fig infiltrating ruben’s dream, making it look like the place where his friend was murdered, and then disguising herself as kipperlilly & repeatedly saying different variants of “somebody needs to take the fall for this, and it’s not going to be me. it’s going to be you.” while adaine as the elven oracle shows up next to her. can you imagine waking up from that, the idea of a horrible truth being pinned on you by your friend to save her own skin while the personification of fate and destiny stands there, almost as a promise that this is GOING to happen to you. we don’t even know if this kid is guilty. my god.

Happy tdov to fat trans people. 🏳️‍⚧️ Biggest thing that helped me as a trans kid was seeing older fat trans people. There were a lot of really irritating "advice" posts going around early in my time on the internet with a lot of misinformation in them, but one that I constantly saw (in addition to people claiming you should wear your pants rediculously low or only wear button ups) were posts saying you had to lose weight to transition. Can confidently confirm that is completely untrue. 👍

some sketches from today