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wileys-russo · 5 months

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like a dumb rom com (2) II kyra cooney-cross x catley!reader

final piece of writing from me in 2023 besties! have a safe and happy new years eve x like a dumb rom com (2) II kyra cooney-cross x catley!reader

"well good morning little mrs cooney-cross." you bumped into teyah who was leaving as you arrived, passing one another in the hall as you gave her a playful shove.

"shut up!" you rolled your eyes, chatting with her for a few minutes before parting ways as she headed down to the carpark and you off toward the apartment she shared with kyra.

"waiting for me are we, bit eager?" you teased seeing your girlfriend already leaning in the open doorframe as a grin broke out on her face and she pushed her phone back in her pocket.

"nah i'm actually waiting for my thursday girlfriend. you're friday through monday, remember?" kyra smirked as you punched her shoulder and she pulled you inside, lips on yours as the door was kicked closed behind her.

"kyra lillee!" you shouted forty five minutes later, the brunette yelling back from the kitchen as she filled up your water bottles for training. "come here!" you shouted again with a huff as she appeared in the doorway of the bathroom behind you with a raised eyebrow.

"look what you did!" you moved your hair out of the way and pointed accusingly to your neck, frown deepening at the amused smile which curled onto your girlfriends lips as her eyes roamed over the hickies littering the right side of your neck.

"oops?" the younger girl smiled innocently as you mumbled under your breath. "do you have concealer?" you questioned as she shook her head and bit her bottom lip. "not in your shade babe."

"kyra!" you groaned, hands gripping the sink as your head fell forward to press against the mirror. "in my defence you didn't exactly stop me." the midfielder pressed herself into your back as you shrugged her off. "not helping!"

"we could swing past yours sometime between coffee, breakfast and training? you have concealer right?" kyra stepped past and pulled herself to sit up on the sink. "well yeah but steph will be there, and there's no chance she doesn't notice these. she notices when i've got my shinpads on the wrong feet." you sighed, letting out another groan.

"mm i could distract her? let you dart inside, just say you forgot your boots or something." your girlfriend suggested, poking you with her foot as you swatted it away.

"i'm not you ky i don't forget things." you had to let out a smile as she kicked you again. "i'm sorry baby, really. forgive me?" she jumped down and grabbed your hips, pulling your body into hers with a pout.

"only because i can't stay mad at that stupidly cute face of yours."

"so we go in, you distract her, i go to my room and cover them and we leave asap." you recounted as you pulled up outside the house, parking on the curb as to not alert her to your presence right away.

"kyra!" you smacked her when she didn't respond, pulling her head out of the clouds. "right! yes sorry, good plan babe." your girlfriend zoned back in, the two of you getting out of the car and heading up the driveway.

the first hurdle came when you were too slow grabbing your keys out, hearing someone start to unlock the door from the other side as kyra quickly yanked your hood over your head and you hurried to fix your hair.

"hi?" you gave a small sigh of relief seeing it was dean who opened the door, pushing past him and making a beeline for your room. "hey what-" you heard steph as you zoomed past her, ducking under her arm and into your room, kicking the door closed.

"i thought you left already?" you heard your sister call out, kyra making quick work to engage her in conversation as you hunted around for your concealer.

"of course when i need it i can't fucking find it." you grumbled to yourself as you fussed about in your makeup bag, finally pulling it out from the bottom. "fucking kyra." you mumbled to yourself again as you tugged your hood off.

"little leech." you huffed, hearing her laughter ring out from the living room followed by stephs annoyed groans about something she'd likely said to wind your sister up, a skill that never seemed to be out of stock for your girlfriend.

making quick time to cover them up as best as you could you nodded at the job, grabbing one of your textbooks off your desk and opening the door. "ky lets go!" you called out, the brunette detaching herself from steph.

"you're such a pest! no wonder the two of you are thick as thieves, both just as irritating as one another." steph groaned shoving the girls head to the side who grinned. "why the rush back?" your sister questioned, grabbed your arm as you tried to duck past her again.

"forgot this. need to study today!" you smiled holding up your textbook and grabbing kyra. "didn't you already have your sociology exam?" steph questioned with a frown, crossing her arms as you struggled to think of a response.

"some chapters are relevant in her next exam, crossover stuff yanno!" kyra chirped slinging an arm over your shoulder and turning the two of you toward the door.

"well well look whose rubbing off on her little best mate, you gonna hit the books too ky?" steph teased, leaning in the doorway with a smirk as the two of you headed down the driveway.

"i may just surprise you yet stephanie!" kyra yelled over her shoulder with a grin, though your sister wasn't yet to know just how surprising kyra really could be.

"come with me please." you whined as caitlin grabbed your bicep, steering you away from the change rooms as everyone else headed for the cafeteria. "cait i'm starving!" you groaned as she tugged you into one of the recovery rooms.

"so you've told steph about you and kyra then?" the older girl questioned with a raised eyebrow, crossing her arms as you gave her a strange look. "no. why do i look like i've been yelled at today?" you grinned but it quickly faded at her lack of joining in.

"well you might want to consider it because she is definitely going to notice those and have questions."

"shit!" you cursed as caitlin pointed to your neck and you grabbed out your phone camera which confirmed your worries. you'd admittedly forgotten all about the little marks from this morning and with a media session upcoming a lot of the girls had showered in between training and lunch, yourself included.

"its not funny!" you groaned as caitlin finally broke her stern facade and doubled over with a laugh. "foordy help!" you whined, wincing a little as you poked the angry marks and cursing your girlfriend under your breath.

"just put a hoodie on and sit far away from steph. then maybe say your prayers?" the older girl laughed, ruffling your hair and leaving the room as you trudged after her, darting into the change rooms again to grab a hoodie.

you let out a yell as someone grabbed you and shouted boo, the all too familiar laughter which followed having you roll your eyes and shove her away. "you're such a child." you shook your head grabbing your hoodie.

"weren't saying that this morning were we babe?" kyra grinned, glancing around before her hands settled on your cheeks and she pulled you in for a kiss, unable to stop the smile which formed as you did.

"oh well hello!" you jumped apart from each other with bright red faces, heads whipping around to meet the amused gazes of vic and alessia. "will you two be coming for lunch or just eating each others faces?" vic smirked as alessia chuckled beside her.

"don't tell steph." you warned the two older girls who waved it off, stating they'd 'known for ages' and pulling the two of you away with them, all four of you falling into conversation.

following caitlins advice you dragged your friends to sit with you as far away from your sister as you could who gratefully was too busy goofing off with jen and beth to notice you..

though that peace of course didn't last.

"stop!" you whispered, ghost of a smile on your face as kyras hand wandered up your leg, teasingly pinching and poking at your skin as instead the two of you resorted to playing footsies.

"oi!" katie scowled turning around as kyra kicked the back of her chair, pointing to you as katie smacked your leg and you glared at your girlfriend who quickly kissed your cheek and gave you a grin, your elbow nudging into her side as jonas continued to talk.

"do you wanna hang out this arvo?" kyra murmured, grabbing your hand in hers and hiding it in her lap as you smiled. "i have to study, one more exam remember?" you whispered back as she pouted and you shook your head, turning back to the screen with a smile, the two of you still tapping and kicking one another as time went by.

it was at the end of the media session where things started to go a little pear shaped, the lights turning on and kyra quickly dropping your hand, but you failed to see your sisters narrowed eyes a few rows back.

dismissed for the day everyone wasted no time collecting their stuff and heading off, most in small groups or pairs as carpooling was a popular option among the team.

"steph!" you yelped as your sister grabbed you, pulling you back into the room by your hood as everyone else headed out. "what the hell is that on your neck?" you paled at her firm glare, warning you out of anything that wasn't the truth.

"nothing! i burnt myself with the straightener." you rolled your eyes and tried to leave but she held a firm grip on you which you couldn't break. "yeah bullshit. i wasn't born yesterday those are hickies, who gave them to you?" steph asked with a glare as you struggled to pull away.

"none of your business, get off!" you huffed, wrenching yourself free and storming off. "have you got a secret girlfriend or something?" your sister scoffed, grabbing the back of your hoodie as you pushed her away.

"just leave it steph! its nothing." you rolled your eyes, her questions following you into the change rooms as you ignored her. "oi! mum and dad made me promise to look after you, you're too young to be seeing someone." steph cornered you by your cubby as you rolled your eyes and a few of the girls looked over curiously.

"i'm twenty one fucking years old steph i'm not a baby and if i want to get a hickey off someone? i'll get a hickey." you grabbed your bag and shoved past her, ignoring the ooh's from beth who fell silent at a firm look from steph.

thankfully she didn't follow after you and with kyra grabbing a lift home with teyah you wasted no time driving off and heading home, determined to get there and lock yourself away before your sister returned home to no doubt continue the argument.

sure enough you weren't even ten minutes into studying, hauled up in your room with snacks and water that you heard her footsteps thump down the hall. you didn't even have dean as a buffer given he was at his own training this afternoon.

with a roll of your eyes you slipped your headphones on, purposefully pretending you didn't notice when your door swung open and calvin bounded in as you gave him a scratch and gently pushed him off your bed.

"what?" you huffed as your sister yanked your headphones off, holding them out of your reach as you tried to take them back. "who gave them to you?" steph asked, copping a filthy glare as she stretched taller and continued to hold your headphones away.

"none of your business and the more you ask me the more pissed off you're gonna get me stephanie." you warned seriously, snatching your headphones back as she lowered them slightly. "i need to study." you spoke bluntly, pulling them back on and sitting back down at your desk with your back turned.

steph watched on warily with words in the back of her throat before she decided it wasn't worth it, and when you glanced over your shoulder a few moments later the door was closed and she was nowhere to be seen.

with your sister not reappearing for a few hours you used the time to zone in on your studies, your phone sitting on do not disturb on your bed you missed the messages from both your girlfriend and your teammates checking in.

eventually you looked up from your textbook with tired eyes and realised it had gone dark outside. dropping your highlighter and closing your laptop you stretch your back over your chair and sigh in relief as it cracks a few times.

pulling your headphones down around your neck you roll your chair back toward your bed and grab your phone, sighing at the multitude of notifications, too tired to reply to anyone bar kyra.

you noticed two missed calls from your mum and frown checking the time in melbourne realising she'd likely have headed to bed now. sending her a few messages in apology explaining you were studying and would call her first thing tomorrow you slipped your phone into the pocket of your hoodie and stood.

again stretching out your cramped limbs your eyes scan over your planner, plucking off a few different sticky notes with a satisfied nod. your final exam isn't until monday and with the match on saturday you know you at least have tomorrow and sunday free to try and cram in the rest.

though this exam was your last it also happened to be the most content heavy, and though the reward of five weeks off loomed ever closer you knew you had one final push until you hit the finish line.

"done for tonight?" you jumped not having even heard your door open, glancing over to see your sister lingering in the entrance. "yeah. i've still got tomorrow and sunday, i think if i read another word its just going to go in one ear and out the other." you sighed running your finger down what you had left to revise.

"is that how it works when you read something?" you looked up to meet stephs amused smile, but seeing the look in her eyes you know it was as close to an olive branch as you were going to get.

"yeah wouldn't expect you to understand, its hard being the smart one." you quipped back with a smile seeing steph relax a little at your response. "come on, dinners done and calvin misses you." steph spoke with a nod down the hall.

"no dean?" you asked seeing as there was only two bowls of food dished up on the kitchen counter. "out with his team. which means we can watch big brother without his running commentary!" steph grinned handing you a fork as you grabbed the bowl of curry.

"this is so scripted, there is no way someones that dumb!" you mocked his voice. "nah why is she crying? shes doing it for the cameras!" steph joined in, the two of you taking a seat on the lounge with a laugh as steph flicked on big brother.

"hey." you looked over to her a couple of hours later, the two of you now watching a premier league match as calvin slept with his head in your lap, bowls of dinner long washed up and finished. "mm?" you hummed looking back to the tv and groaning as man city scored.

"i'm really proud of you."

"for what?" you frowned at her as she rolled her eyes at your defensive response. "juggling everything. uni, football, living in another country, media commitments, sponsors. it's a lot, but somehow you seem to be managing and thats very admirable!" your sister complimented with a soft smile as you pulled a face.

"you're so weird steph." you shook your head, scratching behind calvins ears as the older girl scoffed. "i'm being nice! that was a very nice thing to say!" she defended with a scowl. "well stop being nice its weird! makes me uncomfortable." you grumbled, never having been great at taking compliments.

"say thank you and tell me you love me." your sister demanded as now you scoffed, ignoring her request and focusing on the tv. "say it!" steph demanded, kicking you as you remained quiet.

"stephanie get off!" you yelled as suddenly her body crash tackled into yours, poor calvin diving off the lounge and moving toward his bed to avoid the squabble.

"you might be bigger now but i'm still older." steph grunted as you struggled to push her off, your arms eventually pinned under her knees as she sat on top of you.

"what are you twelve? get off!" you whined, squriming beneath her and trying to buck her taller frame off without any luck. "no. say thank you and tell me you love me!" your sister ordered, fingers digging into your ribs as you squealed.

"you've very comfortable and you're only making this harder for yourself." steph sighed pressing more of her weight down on top of you as you wheezed slightly. "fine! thank you, love you." you huffed with a roll of your eyes.

"like ya mean it!" steph scoffed in offence, crossing her arms and glaring down at you as you let out a heavy exhale. "thank you for your kind words stephanie, i love you."

"sorry couldn't hear you, bit louder?" "steph!"

"i love you too peanut." your sister cooed getting off of you though not before tightly squeezing your cheeks and shaking your head side to side. "i wish i was adopted." you mumbled with a huff, both of settling back into your previous positions.

"i already told you, we can arrange that if you like?"

"ky!" you grunted as she launched herself onto your back, arms locking around your neck and subtly kissing your cheek as you shifted her, continuing about with your lap. "people are going to take videos of this." you sighed knowingly.

"when do they not?" your girlfriend challenged though she slid off of you anyway, falling into step as katie and caitlin appeared on your other side. the four of you conversing about the game you watched with an amused smile as kyra yanked caitlins hair out of its bun and sprinted off, the older girl racing after her.

"so." katies arm slipped over your shoulder and you sighed giving her a look. "you gonna tell your sister about the two of ya then?" katie asked with a smile as you groaned. "not you too! your girlfriends already onto me about it and you saw how she reacted to the hickies." you huffed defensively, turning away so no one could possibly read your lips.

"which is exactly why ya gotta tell her! the longer ya leave it the worse it'll be because you didn't tell her." katie lectured and you sighed knowing there was some truth to her words. "its not that easy! she's insanely overbearing and overprotective, she won't take it well."

"you're twenty one years old catley, whats she gonna do? ground ya?" katie teased as you shoved her playfully. "i do still live with her." you reminded as katie shrugged. "so move out then!"

"let me guess, you can't?" the irishwoman smiled knowingly as you struggled to come up with a response and you looked up as kyra called you over. "seriously though, tell her!" katie squeezed you before heading off for the change rooms as you caught up with kyra and teyah.

"you coming over for dinner? teyahs cooking!" your girlfriend grinned as your friend rolled her eyes. "you're welcome to. we're ordering in!" teyah corrected smacking kyra as the two of them pushed and shoved one another making you chuckle.

"as much as i do enjoy free front row seats to your roomie wrestling matches, i have to study." you reminded as kyra groaned going limp in teyahs arms. "i'm losing to a stack of paper, some pens and sticky notes, unbelievable!" your girlfriend complained as teyah shoved her off and wandered into the change rooms.

"come on. just for dinner? then i'll drive you home. or i can help you study?" she offered eagerly with a smile, practically bouncing on the balls of her feet as you smiled and moved a strand of hair out of her face.

"no you can't." you shook your head as kyra groaned again, slumping into the wall with a pout. "that won't work. my final exam is on monday ky and i have so much content to cover before then." you sighed apologetically, tugging her bottom lip out from her teeth.

"tomorrow?" "studying." "you can take a break! i'll take you out for breakfast, lunch, dinner, a snack, just a drive, anything!" "as sweet as you are, i can't ky."

"can you hear that?" kyra questioned as you frowned, shaking your head. "thats my heart slowly cracking." your girlfriend sighed deeply tapping her chest as you punched her in the arm. "you're supposed to be supportive!" you shook your head with a laugh.

"i am! i'm supporting your health and well being by encouraging you don't burn yourself out and you take breaks in between your studies!" "mmm a likely story cooney-cross. come on!"

with that you linked arms with her and dragged her into the change rooms.

"here she is! the scholar herself!"

you laughed as you exited the building, feeling about a tonne lighter now you knew your exam was over and you had five weeks off from your studies.

you still had a whole host of commitments including international break so it was hardly 'time off' but it meant your list of things to juggle grew just that little bit shorter for the time being.

"you didn't need to do this you know?" you grinned as your sister handed you a bouquet of flowers, having requested she get the day off training to chauffeur you to your final exam which jonas was fine with.

"course we did. this is a victory for us too you know? no more sticky notes all over the house to pick up, no more stress head by the minute schedule to navigate, no more late nights helping you revise-" dean tugged you into a hug and ruffled your hair having come along in support.

"excuse me you didn't do any of that mate, that was all me!" steph scoffed punching him in the arm and pulling you into a hug as dean grabbed your flowers for you so they wouldn't be squished. "so so so proud of you peanut." you couldn't help but smile despite the nickname you detested.

"i appreciate all the support, really." you mumbled into her shoulder before you broke apart, starting the walk back to the car. "i don't know how you do it, just reading your planner gives me a headache." dean whistled as he fished out the keys.

"breathing and walking at the same time gives you a headache." you grinned, ducking behind your sister as he swung at you playfully and slipped into the drivers seat.

"oh yes!" you exhaled happily seeing the bagged up food waiting for you on the backseat as you closed your door. "all your favourites." steph chuckled as you eagerly pulled out the first box and a fork, the three of you chattering as dean drove out of camden and back toward st albans.

"does this mean we can have a celebratory bonfire and burn all your books?" dean grinned wolfishly as you parked in the driveway. "no you meat head i still have a year of study left to do after this." you laughed as steph rolled her eyes.

"and we don't burn books!" she shoved her fiance who held his hands up in defence. "and when exactly was the last time you even opened let alone read a book, stephanie?" dean challenged, sprinting off toward the front door as steph raced after him and you shook your head with a smile.

balancing your bag, flowers and leftover food in hand you made your way up after them, almost stacking it up the stairs as you caught your footing and exhaled, stepping inside.

rounding the corner you were met with an almighty cheer and this time you did fall to the floor, landing on your ass with a wince as your face burnt bright red and lia hurried to help you up.

"what the hell?" you grinned in surprise seeing nearly the entire team packed into the living room, half sitting on top of one another as streamers and balloons decorated the walls.

"we all wanted to celebrate you and your achievements." steph smiled, taking your food and flowers for you. "i haven't graduated yet!" you laughed as music switched on and you made your way around the room greeting all the girls.

"i'm just gonna chuck my stuff in my room." you notified steph who nodded and fell back into conversation with some of the others. no sooner had you shut your door did a foot kick it back open as a body slid in behind you and it closed with a soft click.

"hello lover!" the midfielder grinned wofishly and you laughed as she tackled you down onto your bed, attacking every inch of your face with soft kisses. "ky!" you managed to get out, your stomach starting to hurt from laughing as she hovered over you.

"did anyone see you come in here?" "nah i was super stealthy, im like a spy babe."

"i am also very very very proud of you, and now you're free!" your girlfriend cheered and you jolted as she pulled a party popper from her back pocket and let it off with a bang, streamers raining down on top of the pair of you.

"well for five weeks." "hey don't spoil this for me!" "oh for you? so sorry baby, how selfish of me." "exactly! horridly mean girl you are, very hot though so it balances out i guess."

"shut up and let someone else have the last word for once would you?" you smiled grabbing her shirt in your hand and tugging her mouth down to properly meet with yours.

"i missed you so much." kyra mumbled out as your hands tangled in her hair and she shifted, laying down beside you as her hands moved to the small of your back pulling your body flush into hers.

"its been three days!" you chuckled in between kisses. "i know! nearly killed me." she retorted, sending you a cheeky grin before pressing her lips back to your own, the two of you making up for lost time.

"we should really get ba-" but your words fell short as your girlfriend took your bottom lip between her teeth, dragging it down teasingly before pressing your mouths together again in a feverish kiss.

in reflection, kyra really really wished she let you finish your sentence.

"hey peanut we're ordering pizza what do you-" your door swung open as you pushed yourself away from kyra but it was much to late as stephs eyes widened and caitlin peeked over her shoulder with a grimace.

"steffy-" you started as you and kyra sat up, caitlin motioning to your shirt from behind your sisters back as your eyes glanced down and you hurriedly pulled it back down where it had ridden up, kyra doing her best to smooth out her hair from where your hands had been tangled through it.

"kyra go to the living room please." her words were deathly calm and that almost made it worse, your girlfriend looking at you then back to your sister whose eyes burned a hole in your head.

"go, its fine." you whispered, squeezing her hand as she nodded, still looking unsure as she stood. kyra hesitated as she tried to move past steph who adjusted her stance to block the doorway, looking the younger girl up and down wordlessly before moving out of the way as kyra scurried off.

"steph look i can-" you started quietly, stopping in your tracks at the look sent your direction. "hey maybe leave it for now, the whole teams here steph." caitlin stepped in, grabbing your sisters wrist who glanced between the two of you.

"you knew already, didn't you." she directed the words toward caitlin though never broke her hard stare toward you as caitlin sighed, the lack of answer the only answer steph needed.

"we'll talk about this once everyones left, get out of your room." and with that she was gone, striding off back down the hallway.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

part 3?

#kyra cooney cross x reader #kyra cooney cross #woso #woso blurbs #woso imagine #woso fanfics #woso x reader #woso community #steph catley x reader #steph catley #awfc x reader

700 notes · View notes

earthtooz · 1 year

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rin kiss cam absolutely a masterpiece, i loveeee it so much <3 but i got an opposite idea. since you are very damn talented writing for sae, perhaps where you and sae had an argument which upset you so much, you have been ignoring him. then the following day, sae has a football match. after the match which of course they win, all the cams are on you and he said “please give me another chance to fix this, us” THEN THEN he held a massive bouquet of roses DJOWJDOSHDJSJDJ

for @limitlesshq - changed up the storyline a little, anon, sorry! your ask gave me inspiration for this, i'm sorry if you don't like the alterations, but i hope you enjoy nevertheless! this is VERY unedited.

sae, who has a sharp tongue and an even sharper attitude to match with that blunt personality of his. sae, whose words burn and singe your skin, leaving searing pain behind that you try not to show, especially when the venom drips onto your skin and brands you with shame, humiliation, and wrath. sae, who has never talked to you like he had in the argument you had two nights ago.

since then you hadn't talked to him, cringing at the thought of messaging him and reaching out. your friends tell you that you should try and mend whatever has happened, that knowing the two of you, sae's probably feeling the same and misses you too. your heart agrees but your conscious is still a little scarred, wincing when you recall the words that were thrown around.

sae had sent you a few posts here and there- like he sometimes does on instagram (they're hardly funny and you're still trying to find a way to tell him that), and you would only respond with a double click of the message instead of a proper response. other than that, he hadn't reached out in any other way.

the problem was that tonight you had a match to attend, with tickets that sae personally booked for you so it'd be a little harsh to not go.

just because you were still... upset at him doesn't mean that you didn't love him.

but did he want you there? what if he doesn't want to see you? what if he's still mad? that's probably why he hasn't made any attempts to try and talk it out and lord knows that you're still too busy fighting your own thoughts to make the first move.

pathetic really, it is, but when itoshi sae is your partner and the person who you have to apologise to... it's a little hard...

nevertheless, you go. your eyes lingered on the jersey he had given you, debating on whether or not you should wear it.

you decide against it, walking out of your apartment with a sinking feeling that it was a decision you'd regret. at least you still looked cute.

arriving at the stadium, you occupy your seat quite quickly especially since you were watching solo today. it's always daunting to be alone, especially in an environment like this, but you don't want any of your friends to witness how rocky you and sae are right now, so just purchasing this one ticket was a good idea.

even if that meant you had to cure your own boredom by scrolling on your phone whilst waiting for the match to start.

despite your indifferent front, your stomac was doing somersaults from where you jittered with anxiety. was showing up the right move? what if he didn't want you here?

then the stadium announcers begin talking, shushing everyone almost immediately as the teams are introduced. each running onto the grassy field when it's their turn, basking the roars and screams of the crowd that came to support them.

when real madrid comes out, your eye immediately lands on the figure of your boyfriend. although you can't see him all that clearly, it's not hard to identify him from his magenta hair and build; one that you see practically all the time (excluding the last three days).

he's scanning through the crowd, whipping his head around as if in search for someone, and when he finds the vip section for real madrid, his eyes land on you. you can't see him clearly, but there's a shift from his figure, his aura darkening as he slows his steps a little, falling behind from his team.

a fellow teammate has to push sae a little to snap him out of whatever funk he was in and a part of you twists uncomfortably at this weird behaviour of his.

all because he saw you. maybe it wasn't the right choice to come tonight. what if you impact his play?

the kickoff begins before you can think too much about it and the match officially starts, the players scrambling around the field.

90 minutes are over before you can count, the victory going to real madrid (to your relief because thank goodness you didn't affect their precious midfielder).

however, where you thought you would head home immediately after the match, it seems like sae has other plans as he runs towards the barriers separating the audience and the field, eyes locked on you the whole time. he beckons for you to come over and with a little hesitation, you do, weaving through exiting crowds in anticipation for what he'd need.

"congrats for the win," you say in greeting, plastering on a smile to give him the false perception that you were okay. he didn't need a victory to be soiled. that'd be a rough way to end such a pleasant event.

he doesn't meet your smile. instead, his eyes seem troubled, eyebrows slightly furrowed as he looks you up and down again and again, as if his eyes are deceiving him.

"you're not wearing my jersey," he says finally, looking back up at you with turmoil clear in his eyes.

"oh," you look down at your own outfit. "yeah. i decided not to."

"why?"

"well after our argument i didn't know where we stand," you confess shyly. he frowns further before stepping back.

then he takes off his jersey- the one he was wearing, and fiddles with it until it's facing a certain way. he had a long sleeve shirt on underneath but without the jersey, you can see that he's wearing the couples necklace you got for your anniversary.

he then threads the jersey on over you and despite being shocked at his abrupt actions, you comply nevertheless, weaving your arms through the holes.

sae hums in approval and you feel a little gross wearing his sweat-sopped shirt, but he looks content and happy. a stark contrast to the troubled expression he was wearing previously.

you open your arms for a hug. he accepts it, winding his arms around your torso as yours go around his neck. the athlete breathes you in, relishing in the feeling of being so close to you after so long.

"are we okay?" he asks, voice muffled as sae hugs you a little tighter.

"yeah," you respond. he takes his head out of your shoulder, indifferent eyes glossy. you think they're tears, but you're not going to give yourself such high credit.

"missed you. i hate it when you're mad at me."

you chuckle, pressing a kiss to his nose, causing him to scrunch his face at the sensation. "i wasn't mad, sae. i thought you would be."

"me? why?"

"i don't know. you're kind of scary, y'know. especially to those who have wronged you or you don't care about."

he softens before bringing his head to your shoulder again, finding solace in your touch. "but you're neither."

"noted," you laugh, running your hands through his hair. everything feels okay again.

you only find out after the match that sae was hoping you'd come all along and that he even brought gifts for you as a way of apologising after the match.

#sae x reader #itoshi sae x reader #blue lock x reader #*ੈ✩‧₊˚ earf's ideas that i'll never write #for limitlesshq merry christmas #earf's sae rambles #earf's inbox hours ✌️

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bangchansgirlsblog · 4 months

Text

Bending over back

Warning: kissing? A bit of angst, it’s not traumatizing I promise

Pairing: Chan x reader

Summary: Basically your in love with him but your his assistant.

-A/N: i don’t know how I wrote this, it’s quite boring idk. Prolly gonna do a part two. I don’t like this one. HELP.

"Chan?" Her footsteps followed quickly behind him trying to keep up with him as we walked into the dressing rooms.

"Yeah?" He replied dryly as he sat into the makeup artists chair after saying a quick hello.

"You have a meeting with Eunwo and the PR tea-"

"Y/n honestly I don't have time for this right now. You see I have a show in a few minutes and you decide to tell me all this now?" He scoffed and looked up from his phone.

"No Chan it's just that-"

"Just that what? Look your a great assistant and all but your sometimes so uncoordinated. Do you really expect me to remember all the meetings I have?" He glared up at her.

She was wearing her usual knitted sweater, tight pencil skirt and some lofers. Her hair was up in a bun and she held her IPad and Chan's bag one in each hand.

"I'm sorry, it won't happen again," she hung her head low and looked at the floor.

"Good, now go sit on the couch and sit there looking pretty," he stated and went back to scrolling on his phone.

Y/n was so confused because he would be so nice to her and then be the worst person to her at the same time. It was so confusing-

"oh and for God's sake Y/n what do I say about your sweater? It's ugly, I can't have my assistant walking around in such. Get rid of it. You know what, I'll even take you shopping,"

There it was, his sweet and sour side. Y/n was slowly getting tired of the abusive but at the same time she really didn't mind because she had the biggest crush on her boss. The biggest crush ever since she had join JYP and she walked into their first rehearsals as stray kids.

She basically watched him grow up and her feelings grew even more because of all the time she spent with him. Same hotel, same flight, same car, same house, same office. They were together 24/7 and not once did Chan ever try to make a move on her. He just became more and more bratty and even though she was okay with it, it hurt because she thought that maybe one day he would see her as something more but-

"Y/n get me water please," she heard his voice call for her.

Nope. He wouldn't see her as anything more. She accepted it and she was getting exhausted.

The rooms were all lit and they all had different people in them doing different things so it was very confusing for her to note where what was.

The crowded hallways and the lack of space was slowing her down from completing her task and it was frustrating her. Everyone was busy doing their own thing and wasn't bothering to help her out at all. It was almost like she was invisible.

"Can someone please show me where the water dispensers were set?" She asked anybody that could possibly hear her. No one dared to respond so she finally gave up and went into the other guys' rooms hopeful to find that they had accidentally set all of them there and low and behold a whole box of water was sat in Hyunjin's room.

He was getting his makeup aswell so she quickly slipped in then out. Making sure not to distract anyone and she run down the corridor and back to Chan's room where she found him done with his makeup and was now dressing up.

"Thank you love just drop it over there," he instructed. "Can you go pick up one of my friends from the backstage entrance. Her name is Min-Ji. Giver her this so they can let her in," he passed her another backstage pass with her name on it. His smile was very visible. Was this his new girlfriend?

Who was she? Was she pretty?

These thoughts run through her mind as she walked down the same corridors once again until she made it to the backstage door. She gave one of the body guards a high five with a bright smile and handed him the pass.

"I'm here to pick up Chan's friend," she smiled as she told one of the popular and most familiar guards.

"Oh, Chan has a new friend now?" He teased.

"Yeah I geuss, I've never met her before. Do you see her anywhere out there?"

"I'll have to make a call, one second," he Smiled and made his way back outside making sure to lock the door behind him for safety purposes and after what felt like hours but were actually 10 minutes, he came back with a girl. A really really skinny, pretty girl. Her eyes were perfectly shaped, he body was shaped like an hour glass, her skin was made of glass, her lashes were long and she had such beautiful lips.

She was dressed in a two piece and really looked/smelled good. Y/n was comparing herself so hard. The way she dressed was no way compared to the way this girl was dressed and her beauty was no way near the way this girl looked. Her heart was beating at a fast pace and now she knew that she had no chance against her. She knew Chan would never go for a girl like her when he was right next to whoever this was. It made her sad thinking about it.

"Hey! You must be Chan’s assistant," ouch, assistant? Was that all she was? "I'm Min-Ji but everyone calls me Jiji," she smiled and put out her hand for a shake.

"I'm Y/n. The assistant," she shook the hand quickly and led her to Chan's changing room.

"This is really such a big place," Min-Ji commented as they where making their way down the corridors.

"Yeah it is,"

"How long have you been working for Chan?" She asked trying to make conversation.

"About 6 years,"

"Do you have any advice? You know...for me?" That made Y/n start to slow down her pace because what was she trying to say?

"What do you mean?"

"Well you know...I have a big crush on him and he invited me here tonight. Do you know how i can be different? Like catch his eye?" Her cheeks were red from all the blushing she was doing. Probably thinking about all the possible ways her and Chan could be together.

Oh.

"Well, I don't know really. Just be yourself I geuss," Ofcourse such a hot girl like her wanted Chan! It was Chan after all! Ugh! The hot tears started to build as she thought about the situation over and over again.

"Chan she's here," y/n knocked on the door and slowly pushed it open.

"Ahhh, great! Min-Ji! Hey love," he smiled and moved away from the stylist to give her a hug,

"Hey Channie! Long time no see," she giggled.

"How are you? Please take a seat, I still have a lot before I get ready. Y/n please, get her a drink," Chan said.

"Ofcourse," she smiled through her teeth. Deep down she wanted to die as she watched the two interact and be all touchy. That should be her but..

She's just an assistant.

The show was great, everyone was happy with the outcome. Everyone had fun! Everyone enjoyed their time there and now it was wind down time. One of the trickiest parts of the day because everyone was shutting down so everyone was everywhere.

"Y/n you can go now, wait for us outside," Chan said shooing her away. She was shocked at this action. He wanted to spend some alone time with Min-Ji and it was so obvious. The both of them had been whispering and giggling with eachother for the past 30 minutes. It made sense for him to want her out. She wouldn't be surprised if they fucked.

The pain that she felt in her chest turned into anger and the tears that threatened to leave her eyes were not making it any better. Why? Why did she have to go and fall in love with her boss? Why her?

"Y/n!" Someone yelled for her making her jump a little, "what are you doing outside?! Get Chan and let's go!" One of the managers yelled as he walked up the corridor towards her.

"Sir? Sir he’s in there with someone-"

"Did we hire you to be standing around all day?! I told you we're on a tight schedule! We should be in a bus right now because we have a flight in less that 4 hours," he run a hand through his hair as he continued to yell at the poor young girl.

"Sir I tried to tell him, but his with-"

"Get him in the bus now. I don't want your excuses," he shoved past her making sure to hit her shoulder. Her hand automatically rub the area. Her feelings were now even more emotional than before.

She had tried warning Chan but instead of understanding Chan yelled at and now she got yelled at again. Was anyone going to actually be nice for once?

She quickly knocked on the door and prayed that Chan wouldn't be pissed off. Maybe he would be in a good mood to be rushed.

"Chan we really need to go! Please just come out," she begged.

"5 more minutes!" He replied.

"Chan we need to go! Mr-" the door swung open and cut her off. Min-Ji came out with her hair a mess and her lipstick everywhere. Her cheeks were flustered as she quickly made her way out and past her. Seeing her like that was the last draw for Y/n as tears slowly started to roll down her cheeks. She looked back inside the room and saw that Chan was fixing himself.

The tears wouldn't stop as she looked at him, analyzing him and trying to find some type of reason to run away and hide.

"Hey, do you think that..." he trailed off as he turned to look at his assistant. Worry quickly filled him as he made his way to her. "Hey? What's wrong?"

Why did he care? Y/n thought.

"Did someone do something? Why are you crying?" He looked down both sides of the corridors and saw that no one was there, so what was really going on?

"N-nothing," she shrugged his hands off her body and made her way inside but was stopped by a hand grabbing her arm.

"I've never seen you cry before so something has to be wrong-"

"I'm just your assistant," she sobbed. Chan was taken back because yes she was his assistant but that's not what she was to him.

"What do you mean?" He asked. His feelings now getting worked up but he couldn't help but ask why? Why was he getting so worked up after seeing her upset.

"Chan just let it be, we're going to be late," she wriggled her hand out of his tight grip and put her iPad inside her bag. She grabbed everything and made sure everything was left in place before grabbing his bag but was quickly stopped again.

“Y/n, love. Tell me what the matter is, I won’t tell anyone,”

The tears were heavy as they fell but nevertheless she still had shit to get done and Chan was shocked as to why she was still able to get shit done when she was having a mental breakdown. He felt bad.

"L-let's go," she breathed. Her chest pumping up and down at a high pace.

"Can we talk about what's made you upset?" Chan asked softly.

"Chan not now, please..."

"Later?" He asked hopeful and he got a head shake in response but he was satisfied with it.

"Can you atleast calm down for me? Just breathe," he took a few steps closer until he was towering over her. His hand land by her arms and he rubbed them trying to calm her down. It was working but the intense eye contact he was holding with her was scaring her. Her brain was foggy as she silently got lost into his eyes. Little did she know he was also getting lost in her eyes. He slowly analyzed her facial structure….he found her beautiful? The tension grew as he kept whispering encouraging words so she could calm down

until she did it.

She got on her tippy toes and kissed him he instantly kissed back and when she realized what she was doing she pulled away. Adrenaline run through her body as he looked at her shocked.

“Woah,” was all he was able to say to her.

Embarrassment grew in her chest before she knew it she was running out with door. She run to fast that she couldn't hear Chan's calls for her.

She entered the bus and sat in one of the empty sits and covered her head with her hoodie and pretended to sleep.

What the hell was that?

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hgfictionwriter · 2 months

Text

Ache

Jessie Fleming x reader

Summary: Sometimes love isn't enough. Despite how much you and Jessie love each other, life gets in the way.

A/N / Warning: Angst. And no smut. Yet lol.

A heavy sigh escaped you as you rounded the corner to your apartment. Your eyes were trained on the concrete below as you dug in your pocket for your keys. The evening wind was brisk and sharp against your skin. When you lifted your gaze, the figure before you froze you in your tracks and your chest tightened immediately, breath catching in your throat.

"Jessie?"

She'd been staring at the ground and her head snapped up as she was broken from her thoughts. She shot up from where she'd been sitting on the ledge of the garden outside your building. Her eyes were wide as she looked to you and though she opened her mouth to speak, the words were lost on the tip of her tongue.

It'd been weeks since you'd talked and so much longer since she'd been to your apartment. You swallowed and internally cursed at how, even after all this time, just the sight of Jessie made your eyes prickle with the start of tears.

"Again?" She'd asked. Her voice was tired as it came through the phone and you cast your gaze down at the disappointment that bled through.

"I'm sorry. I tried to get someone else to go, but I own the account, so-"

"I know, I get it," she cut you off. There was no malice in her voice, but it wasn't any less sad. "I know you have to go."

"I'll be back on the 6th. My flight doesn't get in until after dinner, but you can come over," you told her, trying to sound positive.

"I leave for camp at 4 the next morning." Again, her words were simple and they weren't accusatory, but the heaviness between you was loud. You stopped trying to hide.

"We've only seen each other once this month," you stated.

"I know," she said quietly.

Silence began to fill your conversation.

"So, what do we do?" You finally asked. Your chest already ached knowing what the answer was. This feeling, this moment, had been creeping in for months. You'd done what you could to keep it at bay, but its inevitable arrival was here.

A few seconds later she responded.

"I don't think things are going to change any time soon." Her voice was soft, mixed with regret and acceptance. "And it shouldn't. We're both doing what we should be doing. I can't slow down - I have to make the most of my career while I can. It's the same for you."

"I know," you agreed as tears began to well in your eyes. "I'm so proud of you, you know." You added with a small laugh that didn't fully veil the way your voice choked up. "And I never want to hold you back."

"I'm proud of you, too," she echoed, her own voice growing thick with emotion. "And same - I'd never want to hold you back either."

"I really love you," you continued and your voice cracked under the strain. "I hope you've felt that."

"I have." She sniffled. "I love you, too, and I hope you've never had to doubt that."

You bit down on your lip, looking up to the ceiling as tears began to fall down your cheeks.

"I guess this is it,” you said more than asked as your voice wavered.

Another sniffle came through the phone. "I think so." Her voice was taut. "I still want to be friends," she added in a rush, her voice shaking, "but this isn't working. I can't give you what you need, and..."

"I can't give you what you need," you finished for her.

"Yeah," she admitted quietly. "I've never wanted someone the way I want you. I love you so much-" her voice was breaking "-I miss you all the time. And even when we're together, it breaks my heart because I know we have to leave again soon."

"It hurts to be together and apart. I know the feeling," you relayed sadly. "I wish it wasn't this way. I can't imagine loving anyone more."

"I don't want to ask you to wait. And I know you won't ask me to wait for you because neither of us wants to make promises we can't keep."

"Jessie." Her name came out in a strangled whimper and you heard her cry.

"I can't imagine not loving you. But, if you meet someone who makes you happy and gives you what you need...," she trailed off.

"I understand. And I wish the same for you," you said even though it felt like a dagger through your heart.

Silence infiltrated your conversation once more before a laugh escaped you, though it came out more like a sob.

"I did not expect this call to go this way."

Jessie gave a watery laugh of her own. "Me neither." A pause. "I guess it's been coming though."

"I know," you relented. "I just didn't want it to be true."

After a few moments, Jessie spoke again.

"I love you, Y/N."

"I love you, too, Jessie. Always."

You said you'd be friends, but it was all at once too easy and too difficult. As was the problem, it wasn't that often you got to see each other or talk, but when you did, it felt like the most natural thing in the world to be with her. So when she stood too close, held your gaze for too long, or when you'd hug at the end of the night and hold onto one another too tightly and for too long, it tore you apart.

That had gone on for nearly a year, and it hadn't gotten any easier. You fell back into old habits just too easily.

The last time you saw each other, at a mutual friend’s birthday, she’d come over to say “hi”. Innocent enough until something as simple as showing her something on your phone turned into you two sitting so close together your legs touched. As you talked, if you turned your head too much to the side your lips would’ve grazed her cheek. Did she mean for her hand to brush against yours?

The only way to move on was to cut yourself off completely. She'd understood and she even apologized for making things difficult, but it wasn't just her, it was you too.

Now, here she was sitting outside of your apartment, shivering and cold, looking to you and struggling to find her words.

"What are you doing here?" You finally asked. "Shouldn't you be with the team?"

"You saw?" She asked, looking so innocent and you cursed the rush of affection that rose in you.

"Win the Shield? Of course I did." You had to laugh. A smile finally broke out across her freckled face and that still too familiar pink tinge grew darker across her cheeks. You relented some. "You were great. No surprise."

Jessie began to fidget, her hands jostling in her jacket pockets and she shuffled idly from foot to foot. She scratched the back of her neck as she went back to studying the pavement. This time she managed to speak though.

"I-I'm sorry to show up out of the blue. I just - we were all celebrating, and of course I was happy, but, I-I don't know." She huffed in frustration. “I’ve been sitting here thinking and planning what I was going to say and now…”

"It's okay, Jess," you told her gently, understanding that this was not her norm and something was clearly going on. She looked up at you and gave a couple of grateful nods. She studied you for a few seconds and it pained you that even during that time you were getting lost in her eyes.

"I know you said you don't want to see me - that being around each other and talking was making it too hard to move on." She paused, though her eyes didn't leave yours. You saw her steel herself and she straightened up as she continued. "But I don't want to move on. And, to be honest, I've known it deep down for a while now.

"Today - every game, really - I found myself looking out into the crowd too many times searching for you. And when we were leaving, everyone's all stoked to go out and party, but I just wanted to be with you - anywhere with you. I wanted to share this with you. So, even after a year of me trying to tell myself that we made the right decision, I know we - or at least I - was dead wrong. Because I miss you. So much.” Her voice wavered and her eyes glistened. “It's not just this that I want to share with you - it's every day, little moments and the big. I don’t care if it has to be through text or a call most of the time. It just has to be you.”

"Jessie." You breathed her name out, trying desperately to process everything she was telling you. She took a step towards you, shoulders set and determined and she carried on.

"I love you. From the beginning and I never stopped. I know you're trying to move on, but this is me taking a chance and telling you how I feel. I don't want you to move on - I want to be the person you come home to, the person you call, with you through the good and the bad. I know our schedules are still a problem, but I'd rather have one evening with you than a year without."

Your breath hitched as her proclamations grew. You saw her clench and unclench her fists nervously before she continued.

“And even if one day you’d decide we could be friends again,” she trailed off momentarily, gaze shifting away before settling on you once again resolutely, “honestly, I don’t want to be friends. You’re right - we can’t be friends. I can’t be next to you and pretend I don’t want to hold you, I don’t want to kiss you. Or talk with you and not tell you that I love you and you mean the world to me. And,” she took a steadying breath, “I’m really hoping that you feel the same.”

Jessie fidgeted a bit, some of her doubt and insecurity creeping back in. Still, she looked at you with hopeful eyes.

"So, will you have me?"

#jessie fleming #jessie fleming x reader #jflem #woso #woso community #woso x reader #woso imagine #canwnt

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littlemissclandestine · 1 month

Note

Please please please, I wanna know how adler and makarov will comfort us, like hcs, I mean, please? I want sweet thing because am very sad

Howdy Anon! 🤠

Thank you so much for the ask! Sorry to hear you're not feeling great and hope you feel better soon. Wasn't sure whether you wanted platonic or romantic or whatnot so I just thought of a mix (kinda) i guess. Sending hugs and hope you enjoy! <33

════════════⋆★⋆════════════

---------------Russell Adler Comfort Hcs-----------------

So as you know, Adler isn't the type of guy to get all emotional (Feelings? What are feelings?) but there's no doubt he'd try to be there for you as best he can

He sometimes does stay silent. Mostly because he's just trying to figure out what to say and how to say it but it doesn't take too long for him to come up with something

He's a great listener for sure. You can rant to him about anything and he'll make you feel heard. Hell, he could probably even relate to it.

Phone calls to check up on you are a given -> "Right. I'm coming over. Promise me you won't do anything stupid in the meantime? Be there within the hour, okay?"

You might find yourself crying on the couch and he'd sit beside you. He'd probably place a hand on your thigh and give it a light squeeze as he asks you what's wrong

If you refuse to answer, he'll play some slow songs and pull you up and off the couch and into his arms to slow dance because he knows it'll earn a smile from you. He'll brush a stray piece of hair out the way and look into your eyes, telling you he loves you.

If you're really having a meltdown and you're in a right state, he'll pull you into his body, resting his chin on top of your head as he whispers words of encouragement to you, not caring that his favourite shirt is drenched. -> "That's it, just let it out. You're gonna be okay. I'm here, alright? Shhh. I'm not going anywhere."

If you're in public having a panic attack, he'd notice the signs. The way your watery eyes dart all over the place being hypervigilant of your surroundings, the way you cling to him a little more than usual, how you aren't responding to him, how your breathing is quick and you feel all clammy. It's his job to know.

He'd take you to the side and shield you as he talks you down. Maybe even take your hand and lead you to the public toilets, making sure it's clear to freshen up and have some space and privacy. -> "You ever heard of box breathing, kid?"

He'll take you back to his car for a long drive and offer you tissues and strike up a conversation, your favourite songs playing in the background while you steady your breathing

He'd hold your hands in his to ground you if need be and rub your arms and thighs as you sob violently, staying quiet, looking away and closing his eyes briefly as he hears you. He can't bare to see you like that.

Russell would also cup your face, wiping your tears away with his thumbs as he asks you to look at him and he calms you down with that low, husky voice of his. -> "You'll get through this, okay? Just like you always do. Only this time, you've got me. So let me take care of you."

He's one to always come up with solutions to your problems, no matter what it is

But he's also brutal. No sugarcoating.

════════════⋆★⋆════════════

-------------Vladimir Makarov Comfort Hcs-------------

I feel like, whereas Adler has more of a way with words and is someone who also gives you comfort through touch, Makarov mostly uses a more materialistic approach but that's not to say he doesn't use touch.

He'd ask if you wanted to go out shopping (retail therapy) where he'd spoil you crazy, letting you buy whatever you want. A dress? Sure. A watch? Of course. A diamond necklace? You got it.

Mak would take you on a helicopter ride for sure during the day or even night, letting you take in the sights.

Makarov may offer to take you out for dinner to your favourite place, getting his goons to make the reservation (or threaten someone to give up their reservation and hold the poor receptionist at gunpoint so you can get a table right there and then).

But don't get me wrong...he'd defo watch your comfort movie with you again, no matter how many times you've watched it. You both just cuddling on the couch with a blanket as he plants kisses on your temple.

He'd crouch down in front of you, rubbing your knees as he asks you what's troubling you. -> "What's got you crying my beloved? What do you need from me?"

He's defo a hand holder so he'll rub your hands and draw circles on your palms and intertwine his fingers with yours. -> "It's okay, my love. Breathe. Just breathe."

This guy loves giving forehead kisses and you can't tell me otherwise. His kisses linger and he rests his forehead against yours for sure as he talks you down.

As you two sleep, he'd be the big spoon, wrapping his arms around your body, keeping you close while he whispers words of praise and how you don't have to worry as he'll always take care of you.

If it's someone who's causing you problems, Makarov goes pew pew and calls it a day.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*✧･ﾟ: *

Note: I was a bit biased when it came to Adler. Whoops. Hope that's okay for now. I might edit this post and add some more when I can. Defo doing a part 2 to Adler's comfort hcs. This was a nice little exercise though. Always a pleasure to write for COD men ;) - Star ☆

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sxcret-garden · 5 months

Note

HI ITS 🪐 ANON AGAIN, SO I FINALLY REMEMBERED WHAT I WAS ALSO THINKING ABT THE OTHER DAY so most likely of any of the the ateez members (i don't have a specific one you can choose BAHASHFKCNMXKD) with an s/o who is like pretty quiet in bed like bcs sometimes people take it as a bad thing but IDK i'm not super loud so it just makes me wonder :")

Aaaaaaa i'm finally getting to this as i try to empty out my askbox a bit!! Sorry for the long wait 😭 gonna answer this as an mtl, explanations are under the cut~

most

Jongho

Yunho

Yeosang

Mingi

Seonghwa

Wooyoung

San

Hongjoong

least

I put Jongho first cause I think even if you don't make noise at all he wouldn't mind, so long as you have other means to communicate whether you like what he's doing at the moment or if he should change things up a bit. Will definitely be more talkative in this case and fill the silence with praises and muttered "I love you"s, and always asks if you feel good. The type to hum in response when he does tickle a sound out of you, and if he manages to make you moan as he makes you cum, he will certainly tease you about it with a soft smile afterwards - don't be fooled though, this guy adores every single sound you make, and will figure out over time how to lure those sweet whines out of you

Yunho does like hearing your voice during sex, and even as you're making out and fooling around before getting to business, but I think he actually prefers a partner who's on the quiet side. Little whines and silent moans do so much more to him than if his partner is super loud, and you bet he'd get drunk on hearing your voice like this alone. Whispers all the things he wants to do to you in between kisses, and if all you can respond with is a weak whine against his lips he'll just feel that much more turned on (and this might lowkey make him want to ruin you....)

I think Yeosang is a bit similar to Yunho, in that he prefers a partner who isn't super loud. He does like having you talk to him during sex, because the communication makes him feel comfortable during the whole process, but if you're not one to moan a lot or to cry out when he hits just the right spot that's totally fine with him. Even just the way your breathing speeds up and becomes heavier as you're nearing your high is a sound he'll appreciate and that'll make him eager to keep going. Whisper praises into his ear about how good he's making you feel and the guy is melting under your words alone

I see Mingi as the shy type if he hasn't been with a partner for long enough, so I think he'd absolutely understand if you're not very vocal in bed - whether the reason is because you're shy about it or because it's simply not your style. However, he will encourage you to let out your voice a bit more when he's having sex with you, because he's just really really curious about all the sounds you might make while he's pleasuring you. Very patient and will do his best to ease you into the process, and whenever you let out even the most quiet of moans he'll be right there to tell you how beautiful your voice sounds to him and how much hearing you turns him on

Seonghwa would definitely be surprised if you're barely making a sound, eventually stopping what he's doing to question whether you're enjoying yourself or if you're just doing this for his sake (which he really doesn't want). It definitely feels a little unfamiliar to him at first to have such a quiet partner, but that isn't to say he wouldn't get used to it. Would definitely talk to you more than he would with a more vocal partner, and will naturally slow down a bit to make sure you're liking what he's doing. However, he would certainly also sometimes nudge you to make more sounds, because no matter how understanding he is, there are times where he's just desperate to hear your voice during sex

I put Wooyoung so low because I'm convinced he'd have sooo much fun with a very vocal, loud partner, and because I think he's very vocal as well. He too will be surprised when he learns that you tend to be very quiet in bed, and this will just instantly make him that much softer for you. Doesn't know what to do with himself when he gets to hear your soft whines and deep sighs at the way he's touching you, and will soon find himself addicted to luring those little noises out of you. He just can't stop himself and will go as far as to overstimulate you out of pure curiousity and because it's fascinating to him how you can make him feel so many feelings at once with a simple quiet mewl

Now San is one who needs the verbal communication, even if it's just you two moaning at each other's touches. Gets seriously worried if you don't make a single sound because he's scared you might not like being intimate with him or that he's set you off in some way. However, he will be soso soft for you in an instant once he hears you give him little whines and moans or even if you whisper a curse through gritted teeth - the latter especially is gonna be such a huge turn on for him. I feel like he'd naturally match your energy and sex with him is gonna be a lot softer if you're on the quiet side than if you're very vocal from the start (but that doesn't mean he won't be willing to be rough or more experimental if you ask him to!)

I feel like Hongjoong lives off of dirty talk and getting the most desperate noises out of you, which is why he's last in the list! Not to say I don't see him enjoying himself with a quiet partner, but sometimes this guy just needs someone to talk back at him and his teasing as he's fucking you, someone to whisper the dirtiest things into his ear and to let him hear the sweetest whines when he's going just a bit too slow on purpose, and sometimes also someone to shower him with praises while you're making love at the end of a rough day. Just loves hearing your voice so much and the way you talk to him during sex just turns him on the most out of everything, so he just thinks it's a shame he doesn't get to hear more of it! Though he will be the most understanding ever if you're not comfortable with the idea of being a little louder too

#ateez smut #ateez hard hours #ateez mtl #ateez imagines #ateez x reader #hongjoong smut #seonghwa smut #yunho smut #yeosang smut #san smut #mingi smut #wooyoung smut #jongho smut #hard hours #smut #mtl #🪐 anon #ask #answered

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cobaltperun · 4 months

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Lost (14) - Collide

Tara Carpenter x female Reader

Summary: To anyone on the outside, and to Tara’s friends, you were Tara’s fierce protector, the MMA fighter who’d take anyone on for Tara. The Guard Dog, as Amber called you. You had no idea you’d have to protect her from people who claimed they loved her. It didn’t matter. As long as you and Tara had one another there was nothing you wouldn’t be able to survive.

Story warnings: Scream violence, family issues, trauma, angst, certain sensitive topics

Word count: 5.9k

Story masterlist / First part / Previous part / Next part

-Where do we go from here when they're tearing down our lives?-

The steaming mug of hot chocolate, a warm blanket, and another night all alone. If only there weren't so many memories tied to this house she would have moved somewhere, at least to an apartment or something. It was just too hard to think of anywhere else as her home. Even now that she had a second chance in you.

In a way, at the very least.

You've said it once, you're not Zack. You're still the only family he had beside her. At least as far as the family that accepted him goes. So, in a way, you were the only living reminder of him. You made her so happy when you visited her. And you brought the most wonderful, loving girl, with you.

Her phone suddenly rang. Maybe it was you, she rarely got calls from anyone else, but you made sure to call every now and then. Then she'd get to talk to you, Tara, and sometimes even Sam. Now that she thought about it, she had an unread message from you, she got it while she was at work and then it slipped her mind to read it later. That was probably why you were calling. So, Susan picked up her phone.

"Hello, Susan," she didn't recognize the voice. Maybe it was one of the patients from the hospital, or a doctor or a nurse she rarely talked to.

"Hello, I'm sorry, but who is this?" she took a sip from her mug, the warmth easing her loneliness as she waited for the answer.

"Oh, no one important. I was actually calling because of Y/N, she told me you are her half-brother's mother and that if anything happened, I could call you," Susan immediately sat up straight at that.

"Did something happen to her?" she wanted to hang up and call you right away.

"Not yet, no, but it could. So, what's your favorite scary movie?" Susan, having read the books after what happened to you, recognized the line. She remembered the state you and Tara were in when you came to her house.

If what she heard was true she was done for. The killer was with her. So, she hung up, quickly opening the messages. She didn't even get to type a single letter before a knife stabbed her back. She cried out, dropping her phone. The piercing of her flesh continued as the figure of a masked monster in black robes came into her line of sight. The stabs would have been enough, but the killer made two deep cuts on the crooks of her arms. She'd bleed out slow enough for it to hurt, but quickly enough so that no one could help her.

And then the monster left her, lying on the floor.

She could barely move her arms, but the adrenaline still pumping through her veins helped her reach the phone. She managed to type exactly three letters as her vision became blurry and hit send. She wouldn't be found until two days later when a neighbor noticed her doors were left wide open.

Thousands of miles away, all the way in New York you were woken up by your phone. You groaned, reaching over to your nightstand, and blindly grabbing your phone to look at the message. You smiled. Leave it to Susan to respond with only one word.

"Mhmm, Y/N," Tara complained sleepily as she hid her face from the light coming from your screen.

"Sorry, Love,” you kissed the top of her head as an apology. “It's Susan. I'm guessing she's down to spend Thanksgiving with us," you couldn’t help but pull her a bit closer when you felt her smile against your neck. It was Tara's idea, really, because not only did you have spare room, but Susan was important to you, and Tara liked her a lot as well, so it was a logical suggestion as far as Tara was concerned. Once you heard that you went and invited Susan to spend a week in New York, since you hadn't seen each other ever since you came to New York.

Her response? Fun. You figured that was a 'yes' and sent her a thumbs up, which she immediately read. No response came, but you expected that, as Susan wasn’t too big on texting. You'd just call her after you figure out a proper plan for that week. Which would have to wait, because you had another exhausting week ahead of you.

~X~

Nine, god damn, hours. You felt like you were just about ready to kick Thomas' ass for just dropping a two-week-long vacation on you out of the blue. If only it was your vacation.

So, instead of canceling his classes you were replacing him. Instead of doing the morning sessions and the second afternoon training session, which would mean 4 and a half hours at the gym, you were stuck with Thomas' sessions as well. Which basically meant you were at the gym from 6:45 am to 10:15 a.m., then again from 11:45 a.m. to 3:15 p.m., and finally from 4:45 to 8:15 p.m. So, nine hours of training people and an hour and a half to keep the gym running. By the time you came home after the third training session, you were too exhausted to do anything. And you meant anything! Cooking? Cleaning? Almost all of your chores were now split between Sam and Tara and you. The best you could do was wash the dishes or do some light cleaning, and you were done.

Tara hated it even more than you did. You tried, you really did, you'd go back home after each double training session, and you'd buy flowers, things like that, but it didn't help much. You loved how needy Tara was, how she wanted to spend time with you, to be held by you. Right now, her neediness proved to be a double-edged sword.

You tried to watch a movie with her, but you fell asleep. Tara understood that. She did not understand how you fell asleep last night while she kissed your neck. She wouldn't even look at you or speak to you when you dropped by after morning sessions.

That's how you ended up right where you were now. Parked near the building where Sam’s therapist worked. It was a busy night, which was to be expected, people were partying and wearing costumes, and the usually busy streets got even more hectic. At least the night was clear, though maybe a bit ominous, or maybe you were just too tired. You would have liked to be at home, with Tara, apologizing for last night, but you were waiting for Sam instead, because you had a feeling it would be better if Sam was with you when you came home. You couldn't be more thankful when she came out of the therapy much sooner than she was supposed to.

"Aren't you a sight for sore eyes," you greeted the moment Sam got into the passenger seat. Then you noticed the look on her face, that defeated look that told you she opened up a bit and it didn't go well. "Rough therapy?"

Sam looked at you, her eyes softening as she noticed just how tired you looked. "Rough day?"

You turned the engine on, loving the way the car came to life. "You have no idea," you sighed, just ready to get home, take the coldest shower possible to keep yourself awake, and hopefully make up for the last night's inability to stay awake. At least driving wasn't an issue. You never bothered to seek an explanation, but whenever you were driving you were completely awake, no matter how little sleep you had, or how tired you were. Step out of the car, sleepy, behind the wheel, completely awake. Maybe it was as simple as being responsible and not wanting to get into an accident, frankly, you only cared that you could drive and not worry about falling asleep.

"Tara?" Sam guessed, though that probably wasn't difficult, you saw how cranky Tara was this morning. Sam must have seen it as well.

"Uh... let's just say I fell asleep when I shouldn't have," you blushed, hoping that Sam wouldn't question it further.

"You've been exhausted ever since Thomas left, I'm sure Tara understands that," Sam did not avoid further questioning.

"Yeah, not when you fall asleep while your girlfriend is kissing your neck," you grumbled through clenched teeth. You didn't need to turn to look at Sam, you could feel the incredulous look on her face. In your defense, Tara was warm, and lying on top of you, and you were tired, and the kisses felt really comforting and good. Comfy and sleepy was a combination not even you could beat.

Sam suddenly began stifling a laugh. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, it's just funny," well, you'd probably laugh about it once Tara gets over it. "You two will be fine, Tara just misses you, you know?"

You nodded, not taking your eyes off the road. You knew better than anyone how Tara was, you knew how much she missed you, and she knew you missed her too. She was just being salty at the moment. "I know, Sam, I miss her too," you couldn't help but smile, it was just a small lover quarrel, not even that, really, since you didn't have the capacity to participate.

"I have an idea," you were vaguely aware of Sam pulling out her phone. Was she calling Tara? Probably.

No one answered though and you were suddenly reminded of what happened roughly four months ago.

"You know you're supposed to pick up when I call," Sam's concerned voice made you even more worried. "I got out of therapy early and Y/N is driving me back home. I was thinking we could cook dinner tonight. I mean, if that's what you'd like," she left the message and sighed.

"She probably, ah, I don't even know, maybe her phone is charging?" you were grasping at straws, but you weren't ready to think of the other options just yet.

"Or she's at a party, Omega something," Sam buried her face in her hands, trying her best to not get frustrated right away.

"What party?" shit, you were starting to think falling asleep last night was the worst possible timing, ever.

"There's a frat party tonight, she really wanted to go, but I begged her not to," the arrangement you and Sam managed to get Tara to agree to, remained unspoken.

After Tara first disappeared and went to a party the three of you came to an agreement. She could have her parties, as long as you or Sam were with her. Mindy or Chad wouldn’t do, Tara refused to listen to them, she refused to stop unless you or Sam made her stop, and as worried about Tara as they were, they didn’t exactly want to go to parties to babysit her. You wouldn't stop her from having fun or drinking until she reached a very specific point between drunk and no longer aware of what was happening.

You hated just watching over her, but you tried to step in sooner exactly one time before she got drunk. The next time there was a party Tara went and disappeared again, so you just figured it was better to stay by her side and make sure she was fine than to drive around the whole damn city looking for her.

"I don't know how to reach her, Sam," you confessed, the mental toll of watching Tara cope in one of the worst ways possible was slowly getting to you. You'd do anything to get her to stop drinking like that, but she just wouldn't listen to you. "Should I just drive straight to that party?"

Sam thought it over. "Let's check if she's home first."

You both knew it was extremely unlikely, but you still hoped.

You hoped even as Sam unlocked the apartment, but you couldn't hope once it was clear Tara wasn't there. You leaned against the wall, completely awake now. "She didn't even bring her taser," you pointed out, huffing as you began pacing the apartment. You knew you should already be heading out to find Tara, but you just needed a moment.

"I'll go get her, rest for a bit," you wanted to argue when Sam said that, but honestly, you just felt relief. "I'll call you if she's not at that party."

"Thanks," you just let her, not sure how drunk Tara would be, or if you were ready for another hunt all over New York, so if you could delay it even for ten or fifteen minutes, you'd accept that opportunity. You sat down on the sofa as Sam left the apartment.

"How the fuck am I supposed to help you, Tara?" you leaned back against the sofa, letting your eyes close just for a moment.

~X~

She was annoyed, not nearly as drunk as she would have liked and the party was running out of alcohol. You were working, and you were covering Thomas’ classes as well, so you were exhausted. Tara understood that, hell, she was thankful that your job functioned the way it did, because you normally had plenty of free time. And you had every other weekend off, seeing as you’d work one weekend, and Thomas would take the other. You had enough time to study, attend most of the classes and still had time for her.

If she wasn’t drunk, she’d admit she overreacted this morning, that as strong as you were you weren’t superhuman and that all the exhaustion just caught up with you last night. That it wasn’t what you wanted, but you just couldn’t fight it, and she knew what kind of effect she had on you, she knew you got really comfortable when she was on top of you.

She’d apologize tomorrow, because she knew you’d get worried when you come home and see she wasn’t there. She still had at least half an hour left until Sam was done with her therapy, and if she was lucky the two of you would take your time coming home, which would let go back home and pretend she was asleep, so maybe she could avoid making you worry.

She had enough time to find a few more drinks, so when a guy that clearly wanted to fuck her offered her drinks, she figured she could just grab the drinks and go back to Mindy and Anika. She’d get drinks, he’d get disappointed, but she wouldn’t have to deal with him too much. At least that was her drunken reasoning.

~X~

When your eyes opened again it was because of your phone ringing. "Did you find her?" you answered without quite looking at who was calling you, it had to be Sam, and you immediately got up, ready to get the car keys if Sam didn't find Tara.

"I did. She's pissed though, she should be at the apartment in a minute or two," Sam warned you.

"She's pissed? Brilliant! Just perfect!" you hung up just as you yanked the doors open and saw Tara climbing up the stairs.

"Don't you even start!" she yelled the moment she saw your mouth opening.

You felt really close to snapping as you stepped outside the apartment to meet Tara. "Oh, I'm sorry, did your party get interrupted?"

You could see she was going to walk by you and get inside, but the mocking in your tone made her halt right next to you. "It did! And you know what? I was about to hook up with a guy!" if you were any less tired, any more attentive to the way her eyes immediately filled with regret when she said that, then maybe you would have been able to control your temper.

Not tonight though. "Well, it certainly wouldn't be the first time you were with someone while loving me, now, would it?!" a low blow, reminding Tara of her relationship with Amber, but you were reaching your limit.

Tara recoiled as if you slapped her. "Do not bring Amber into this, Y/N!"

"Hey, come on, this isn't like you," Chad tried to get between you two.

"Stay out of this," you warned, but Tara was already heading inside.

"No need! We're done talking!" she yelled while marching to your room.

"Oh, no, not this time, Tara!" you went after her, catching the doors just as she was about to slam them shut.

"What do you want, Y/N?! I'm living my life, you hear me?! it's mine, not ours!" she screamed, pushing her finger into your chest. She took a step back, puling the headband she had on off and tossing it aside, her breathing getting faster as she pointed at you again."You're possessive, you won't let me go to any party alone; you've become even more controlling than Amber!"

You threw your hands up in the air, just for a moment looking anywhere but at Tara. "Maybe I wouldn't have to be if you had an ounce of self-control! Or do I need to remind you how I found you the two times you were at a party on your own?!"

"What of it? I ended up in a bad place twice, and? Surely, I've run out of all the awful things that can happen to me by now!" she was having difficulty breathing and the red haze that had overcome you faded away, the telltale signs of her needing her inhaler made you set your anger aside for now.

"And if you haven't? If someone takes advantage of how drunk you are?" you stopped shouting, even though some of the anger was still there.

Tara just shrugged. "Add it to the list, I guess," you stepped away from her and went outside the room. "Y/N!" she gasped your name but didn't come after you, a coughing fit kept her in place.

You weren’t leaving her; you just didn’t get to take the new inhaler out of your bag. Just goes to show how hectic the past week was. You came back to the room, unpacking the inhaler you got a few days ago. "Your current one ran out, right?" you pulled her down to sit next to you and brought the inhaler to her mouth. "I can't, Tara, I can't take it if something happens to you again," you could only hope she would finally hear you. Judging by the way she clung to you, gripping your shirt like it was the only thing keeping her grounded, a tiny bit of you hoped she would hear you this time.

"You're not angry with me?" she asked, tired of shouting as well, tired of being angry, of not having you around since you started covering Thomas’ part of the training.

You almost told a lie as you smoothed out the few strands of her hair that were out of place now that she took the headband off. "I am, but I'm more worried about you than I'm angry at you," especially when her asthma gets triggered. At that point, any argument can wait, and you guessed those pauses also made both of you calm down.

"I wasn't really going to hook up with anyone. I just wanted, I don't even know what I wanted. To make you angry, or to hurt you, I guess? I regretted it the moment I said it," she confessed, tentatively climbing into your lap for comfort.

You took a deep breath, feeling the tension between you two dissipating with every moment. Tara was drunk, and pissed that Sam just showed up at the party, and something probably happened there as well that caused this much anger, so, given last night, she wanted a payback, and so she said something she knew would make you angry. “We’ll be fine,” you muttered, leaning your head against her shoulder, you weren’t completely fine, but you would be.

"I'm not messed up," she whispered into your ear, and you pulled back to look at her. The desire to continue what she started last night was more than evident in her eyes, but you shook your head.

"No, you are. You are still drunk," you weren't about to do anything with Tara while she was even slightly drunk.

Tara responded with a huff and pulled back from you as much as she could while still sitting on your lap. "Fine, fine," she knew better than to argue with you on that.

A knock on the doors caught your attention and Tara got off your lap so you could go and open the doors.

"Oh, thank God you're not fighting anymore," Anika said as soon as she noticed neither one of you was frowning.

"Told you love birds would be fine," Mindy patted her on the back.

Chad coughed. "More important things people," he reminded the two and you tilted your head to the side. "You need to see this," he pointed toward the TV, and you felt a shiver run down your spine due to the worried look on his face.

You and Tara went into the living room, Tara sat down while you leaned onto the sofa as all of you listened to the news. You couldn't believe the nightmare was starting again. Someone was brutally stabbed and a Ghostface mask was found at the scene of the crime. Even worse than that Mindy recognized the names and from the look on Tara's face so did she.

"You know them?" you asked as you sat down next to her. She immediately reached for your hand, grounding herself before she could start panicking.

"Barely, not that it matters, this isn't about us," you could see the worry in her eyes, the fear that it actually was about all of you.

That's when Sam came in, followed by a guy you came across every now and then. Danny? Tara thought something was going on between Sam and him, but she didn't have proof and you weren't about to ask Sam if she wasn't going to talk.

The moment Sam figured out what was going on it was like someone flipped a switch. "Pack a bag, we leave in ten," you and Tara just looked at each other before Tara jumped to her feet.

"Sam! Wait, Sam!" Tara went after her into the kitchen.

"We're leaving town," Sam ordered, not even for a moment considering Tara's objection.

You walked in, hugging Tara around her waist from behind to calm her down, she just had an asthma attack and you wanted her to feel safe. "Sam, you know running away didn't work last time," sure, you came back to Woodsboro willingly, but Amber and Richie were going to use Chad, Mindy, and Liv as bait anyway.

"It'll work this time," Sam picked up the biggest knife you had and went back to the living room.

Tara got out of your hug but began holding your hand. "Hold on, let's talk for a second. 'Cause this might not have anything to do with us," Tara followed after Sam, pulling you along and trying to reason with her.

"Are you serious?" Sam demanded, finally turning to look at Tara.

"It's a big city! It's Halloween. Everybody's wearing masks! You don't know-"

"Tara! Tara, this isn't a coincidence! You knew him!" Sam interrupted.

"Barely," Tara leaned back into you, prompting you to once again place your arms around her waist.

"Chad, Mindy, back me up," Sam turned to the twins.

"I mean it is a bit..." the expression on Chad's face showed he agreed with Sam.

"Too close to home," Mindy basically finished for him.

"Sam, we finally got our lives together here," you took Tara’s side, yes there were issues, yes, Tara wasn't handling things properly, but you were building something here.

"We'll do that again, somewhere safer," Sam assured you, not even wasting a second to push back against any arguments in favor of staying.

"So, you're just making the unilateral decision to abandon my and Y/N's college education and flee the fucking state!" Tara clenched her fingers around your hands. The weaker grip in her left hand nearly made you reconsider.

"Y/N," Sam turned to you, looking for support. "Please don't take Tara's side just because it's Tara."

You shook your head. "Sam, I'm not going to run every time there's a hint of danger. If we do that we'll always be on the run, I won't live like that and if Tara doesn't want that-"

"Which I don't," Tara quickly chimed in.

"Then I won't let you force her to live like that," you could feel Tara's anxiety rising as Sam remained silent.

And then the phone rang, and Tara nearly jumped in your arms. She wasn't the only one affected, everyone was put on edge by Sam's phone ringing.

Sam went over to the phone and rejected the call. "It was Gale," she said, which wasn't a good sign. Especially since Gale's book didn't exactly make any of you the fans of the reporter.

"Why did everyone freak out when her phone rang?" you almost forgot Ethan was there.

"You gotta keep up, my dude," Anika just told him.

Sam's phone rang again, this time from an unknown caller, and though anxiously she still picked up. "Yes?"

There was a pause for a few moments. "Yes, it's me," Sam replied to whoever was on the other side of the line. "Okay, okay, I'll come," she hung up. "It's the police, they want me to come down to the station," she didn't waste a moment and picked her jacket up to leave.

Tara just looked at you. There was no need to talk, you grabbed your jackets and you turned to Chad. "You guys be careful," you went after Tara, grabbing the keys on the way. You considered driving, but the police station wasn't that far, and it was late, it was Halloween and people were partying, so maybe walking was a better option. Not to mention you were still tired, and maybe you didn’t have it in you to drive to the station and back as you were.

You caught up with Tara at the bottom of the stairs and she gave you a quick, though a bit uncertain, smile. "We'll be fine, Love," you quickly leaned down to kiss the top of her head and then she led you outside, after Sam.

"Sam, slow down," Tara called after her sister.

"Tara, no, get back inside, lock the doors," Sam immediately rejected the idea of Tara coming with her.

"Are you serious? Now you don't want to stick together? Besides, I have Y/N," and both you and Sam knew Tara would feel better if you were there for both her and Sam.

"You heard the boss, Sam, don't fight this," you offered Sam a cheeky smile and she just shook her head.

"Fine, let's go," she gave in and motioned you and Tara to follow her.

~X~

You were about ten minutes away from the station when Sam's phone rang again, and you saw that the caller was... Richie?

"The fuck?" Tara said exactly what you thought.

"I never deleted his contact," you raised an eyebrow at that. Really, Sam? "This is coming from his number."

"Don't pick that up," Tara told her, but you were already tuning the conversation out, instead looking around the three of you.

Whoever was behind this now couldn't appear out of nowhere. You couldn't see anything suspicious behind you, but you felt Tara quickly grabbing onto your forearm. You turned around and saw a man approaching, holding a phone, so you stepped in front of Tara and Sam, ready to act the moment he made any move.

There was no need for that, the man just walked by the three of you.

The police sirens put you on edge as you made sure Tara was close to you.

"You shouldn't believe everything you read on the internet, asshole," just as Sam said it you noticed a movement to your right.

And there it was. The familiar robe and mask coming almost out of nowhere, hidden by the darkness of the night and shadows. You pushed Tara toward Sam and stepped between the two and the reoccurring nightmare. You did a quick jab followed by a hook, sending the figure into the bicycles behind him.

Something felt wrong. He fell too easily. As if he decided to fall. "Run!" you ushered Tara and Sam, not that you needed to as Sam was already getting Tara away from the could-have-been fight.

You turned back when you caught up to them, to see the Ghostface chasing after you.

"Y/N?!" you saw fear in Tara's eyes, the confusion caused by you of all people running.

"Something's different! I don't know what, but it just feels wrong!" you liked to think years of fighting gave you a good sense of what someone can and can't do in a fight and you didn't like one bit what happened right there.

Your words only increased Tara's fear. "Help! Please!" She cried out, hoping maybe someone would hear her.

"In there!" Sam pointed at a bodega just around the corner.

The three of you ran in, with Tara and Sam cutting the line and pleading for the clerk to call the police. You just stood with your back turned to them, waiting for Ghostface. You saw him at the door, looking much bigger than you. Tara, probably still thinking about what you just told her, grabbed onto your forearm, and tried to pull you back. "Please, Y/N," you glanced back, seeing the fear in her eyes. That one moment was enough for everything to go wrong. Ghostface quickly killed two men, tossing them aside and advancing toward the three of you.

"Sam! Don't!" judging by Tara's screams you figured Sam was pulling her back.

You relaxed, easily shifting into a fighting stance. As wrong as it felt, you knew there wasn't a way out without a fight. Besides, if you could end this now, you'd have only one more Ghostface to worry about.

"Hey!" the man working at the bodega shouted and raised a shotgun, firing it at Ghostface. As the Ghostface vanished behind the shelves you couldn't help but wonder why the man didn't just shoot first. You know, without warning the clearly armed and dangerous masked individual?

"Go out the back!" he told the three of you.

Well, you weren't about to waste that.

"Thank you!" Tara said, but as the three of you got to the back doors you realized it was locked. "Shit! Keys! We need your keys!"

The man turned to give them to her and Ghostface took his chance. Stabbing the man and taking the shotgun, shooting the man that tried to help you.

The three of you ducked behind shelves and you glanced at Tara. You've fought Ghostface before. You were afraid before. But back then you were afraid for Tara. Now you were afraid of the killer. There was nothing you could do against a shotgun. There was no way you could get shot and survive, let alone continue fighting. There was no way Tara or Sam would survive and just for a moment, between fight, flight, or freeze, your body chose to freeze.

Ghostface shot the freezers behind you, shattering the glass. Sam began moving again, trying to crawl to safety, trying desperately to keep Tara alive. Tara, however, wouldn't move an inch without you.

Another shot knocked a bunch of cans down, halting your escape and making Tara squeeze your hand. That snapped you out of it and you pulled the two of them back toward freezers. From the looks of it, you did that just in time as Ghostface came to the side you were on mere moments ago. You looked at Tara as she silently cried and moved, staying crouched as you moved toward Ghostface. You'd go around the shelves and try to take him down from behind.

Your heart hammered in your chest when you turned around the corner and saw a shotgun right in front of your face. You weren't fast enough to get it out of the way, no, you were allowed to grab it and lift it up. "Run!" the last time you screamed as loud as you just did Amber was holding Tara at gunpoint.

"Y/N!" Tara screamed your name, but you didn't look at her, you looked at Sam.

"Take Tara and run, damn it!" you yelled, pushing the shotgun up to make sure Ghotface couldn't shoot any of you. You couldn't focus on anything else, not on the screaming or Sam's frantic attempts to get Tara out of bodega, you could only focus on the fight. You felt a small sense of relief, knowing that as long as you kept holding the shotgun Ghostface wouldn't be able to let go of it either.

The moment you vaguely heard the doors opening you yanked the shotgun down and kneed the man in his stomach. There wasn't even a grunt, but he tossed the shotgun away so that neither of you could use it. You let him, using the small opening to land an uppercut to the jaw, followed by several hard and fast punches to the face. You pushed him into the counter, continuing the assault. It felt wrong. It felt like your punches barely affected him. He was moving, reacting to your punches, but it was too much, it was as if he was moving on his own, and not due to your hits.

A hard hit to the side knocked all the air from your lungs and he easily pushed you back. He slammed his shoulder into you, taking you to the ground. You gasped for air, barely having time to put up a guard before a fist could connect with your face. You recognized this feeling all too well. You were in this exact position plenty of times. You raised your elbow, hitting his jaw and getting up just enough to put him in a chokehold.

Another hit to the side nearly made you let him go, but you squeezed harder, trying to find a way to snap his neck despite the mask. The third hit to the side loosened your hold enough for him to get on his feet and slam you back down on the ground. You felt like everything was spinning as he repeated the same motion again. Lifting your entire body up and slamming it back down on the hard floor. By now you were too shaken to even hold onto him.

And then you went flying, right through the glass and onto the pavement.

"Y/N!" that was Tara's voice. Shit. She didn't get far enough.

"Run, you idiot," you wheezed as you rolled over, trying to get on your hands and knees. The police arriving saved your life.

Tara was immediately with you, yet you barely heard her saying your name, you barely felt her worried touch. A single thought went through your mind as the police officers scattered around the perimeter and all you could see was a mask on the store's floor. 'I can't beat him.'

#tara carpenter x reader #tara carpenter x female reader #tara carpenter #tara carpenter x you #scream #sam carpenter #jenna ortega x reader

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the-californicationist · 4 months

Note

s-soap with a dommy mommy? (it wont let me ask as anon so pls dont judge me)

most people have been really nice but i had an anon get a little aggro so I switched it off for now - sorry! I'll turn it back on after i feel brave again. tumblr is so scary to me cause im pretty new to it, and sometimes its hard for me to deal with it. lol

But! It is not hard for you, Soap's dominatrix girlfriend, to deal with him. He thought he'd leave his pretty black leather collar at home when he went into the field last month. When he walked into the door tonight, he saw his collar and leash hanging in the window, dangling like a shining medal, and he knew he was in for a true punishment.

NSFW below the cut. TW: dom/sub, whips, sounding, anal play, femdom, explicit consent, some aftercare

In truth, he'd been looking forward to it. Soap had left the collar behind on purpose - not out of shame; it blended in with his tactical gear seamlessly, and no one asked about it - but because he knew you'd be waiting to reprimand him... deliciously. Even just leaving it on its tiny hook before shipping off had made his cock leak with anticipation, and driving back home had given him the exact same feeling.

Soap heard you before he saw you. Your whip and its tell-tale snapping as it thudded languidly against the hardwood floor filled the quiet house with threatening little echoes.

Slap.

And then, silence. You saw him step into the doorway, peeling himself apart, garment by garment, happy to receive his punishment from you, his judge and juror. You were his Master, and he was your faithful dog, ready and eager to heel.

Naked, he padded toward you, sinking to the floor on his knees, waiting for your edict.

"You thought you could go across the world without me, my darling."

"No, mistress. I didnae mean --"

Slap!

The whip carved a rut into the floor, right between his thighs, expertly placed, missing him by just a breath, and another scar was added to the landscape of his playroom. Silence filled the space again. You could see his skin twitching across his cheek, and there were goosebumps running up his arms and neck, making his hair stand on end. You brought the body of the whip around to his arm, and you dragged it up, over his elbow, around his shoulders and down the opposite arm in a slow, soft caress.

"That wasn't a question, pretty boy," you purred, using your whip to point to the collar in his hands, "Put it on. Now."

He did so, holding the leash in his two open palms, offering it to you like a meal.

"Remind me," you asked in a quizzical voice, "What did I promise you if you disobeyed me again?"

You watched him swallow hard, both out of concern and excitement. He waited for a moment before answering you, his breathing deep and ragged,

"You promised you would... fuck me, mistress."

You gave him a few quiet tsks with your tongue before leaning down to him, taking his leash in your hand, and yanking him fully down on the floor,

"Tell the truth, Johnny. What. Was. My. Promise?"

You walked around behind him where he lay, face down, and kicked his legs apart, forcing him to spread himself for you. Then, you used the pointed toe of your extremely tall boot heel to press into his asshole, watching as the patent leather of the shoe pried his thick cheeks apart.

He writhed, but he didn't get up.

"You... promised... ahh!"

You knelt down behind him and used the blunt end of the whip to push into his hole, fucking him with the rounded ball of the weapon as slowly as you could.

"I'm waiting..." you threatened, pushing the plastic handle a little further than what he was expecting.

You watched as his body responded to you, twisting muscles and strong bones knotting together,

"You promised you would fuck my cock!"

His voice came out in a low whine, like a wounded animal, afraid and feral. You removed the whip and allowed him to relax before you bent down and licked his gaping hole, shoving your tongue just deep enough for him to feel you.

"Nngh, ahh. Mistress, please... mmf. Fuck..."

"Turn over."

He obeyed you immediately, and you gave his leash enough slack for him to get comfortable. Soap was sweating, panting, and his pupils were like two black, shining diamonds.

"Hands," you reminded him, and Soap immediately tucked his hands behind his back, palms down, trapping them under his ass.

"Yes, mistress."

"Mmm," you chuckled a bit, turning sinister, "You're not fooling anyone. You went, without your collar, on your fucking mission, and what did you think? That you would crawl back here to me and I would reward you after such a betrayal?"

Thud. Thud. Thud.

The heavy tails of the whip made moderate contact with his wide chest, causing him to grunt from the dull pain.

"No! No, mistress."

"You've been a bad boy, Johnny. A very bad boy."

You let the flexible tails of the whip run down the length of his torso, dragging across his skin, all the way down to his rosy, shining cock. He was as hard as you'd ever seen him, and he was leaking all over the place. You loved how wet Johnny got for you. It made everything it touched glitter with silky precome in the low light.

"Yes, mistress. I have," he confessed, finally submitting to you, "I deserve no mercy."

It was beautiful to watch. All of the high-strung, spooled-up excitement he had come in with was instantly washed away. It was like he had found a dark sort of peace, his facial features and his enormous body melting like ice to a flame.

Thud. Thud. Thud.

"Mmngh! Ah, fuck. Mistress, please. More. Please."

Snap. Snap. Snap.

"Yes. Mmfffuck! Fuck. Fuck. Nnnahhgh."

Thud. Snap. Thud. Snap.

"Ahh! Ahh. Ahh. Yes. Mistress. Yes. Yes!"

Red lashes painted your lover's hirsute form like powdered blush. You never hit him hard enough to do damage. You'd had plenty of other lovers in the past who had needed a much firmer hand. Soap was so pliant. So needy. So easy. And his quiet whimpers were your favorite song.

You knelt beside him, petting his sweaty cheek with the back of your hand, tracing your fingers over his open lips, plucking gently at his soft nipples.

"Are you ready for your punishment, Johnny?" Your voice was little more than a whisper.

"Yes, mistress."

"Good boy."

That praise earned you a trembling shudder. It rattled through his body, and you watched as his belly hollowed with each gasp of air.

He'd never tried to using a sounding rod before. You had helped him play with the tip of his cock, just pressing gently into it, letting him understand the sensations you could craft within him. But, you'd promised him you would save it for a special occasion, a truly intense punishment, for when he needed you to bring him back under your wing. It was a difficult tour, you knew, and the closer he got to defeating Makarov and his band of terrorists, the more he lashed out, seeking your protective retribution.

You were more than happy to provide.

Bending over him, you sucked his head into your mouth. Feeling how swollen he was, you knew he wouldn't last long. So, you found the metal rod you had prepared for him, sterilized and ready to be coated in lube and shoved into your lover's cock hole.

You brought it up to his face to let him see it. It was long, but you would only be teasing him with it this first time. If he took it well, you were fully equipped to take him much further. His eyes followed the implement like a moth to a lamp.

"Say your safe word, now."

"Tango."

"Good boy."

You rubbed the rod against his cock, and his whole body convulsed at the feeling of its cold length. He was shaking, his eyes wild with excitement. He looked to you for guidance in the face of this unknown.

"I've got you, pretty boy. Be good for me."

"Yes, mistress," he could barely speak the words.

You continued to rub the rod all around the outside of his cock, circling it, crossing over his slit, and then, finally, you let the tip dip - just barely - into the head of his dick.

"Mmmm, fuck...." He moaned so low that you felt the vibration resonating in his body.

You pulled it out, just a centimeter of insertion, and pushed it back in, over and over. In and out, fucking him with the cool, shining tool. As it entered him, it made soft, wet popping noises from the obscene amount of lube you had used to make it as easy on him as possible.

As you worked the rod, you began to rub his shaft. He was as hard as steel himself, and it was impossible to fit your hand around him. Soap was thick, and your body was hungry to have him inside of you again. But, tonight was for him, not you. You were here to serve him when he needed you most. You controlled him when he was out of control. You created peace in the midst of all of his chaos.

You worked him, up and down, in and out, slicking your palm across his skin, watching as he came undone.

"It's... too much, mistress. I cannae take much more. Please... have mercy."

"Are you asking for mercy," you snarled, "Or leniency?"

"Forgive... me... mistress..." Soap was slowly becoming more pliant and slipping deeper into his subspace.

"You've been so good for me," you pressed the sounding rod just a little deeper into him, and he moaned loudly, "Are you ready to come for me?"

"Fuck, yes, mistress. I cannae last any longer. Please let me come."

"Come, Johnny. Come for me."

You watched all of that strength that he kept trapped behind his skin come alive. His belly sank in with a deep breath, and when you pulled out the rod, he started to erupt with sticky, milky come all over himself and you.

"Ahhh! Ah! Oh, fuck. Fuck! Fuck!"

"Good boy. That's my good boy."

You dropped the rod and released him. All at once, he pulled his hands out from under him and wrapped you up, clumsily tackling you to the floor with him, releasing himself from your care, hugging you tightly to his chest, desperate for your touch. You held him back, running your hands through his grown out mohawk, petting his neck and back, shushing him. He was thanking you, kissing you, pulling you into him to show you his gratitude and his love.

"I promise I'll be good," Soap mumbled into your neck, "I'll be your good boy."

"You already are," you kissed his cheek and smiled down at him, letting him relax into you.

AO3 Link

#call of duty fanfic #cod mw2 #cod mwii #cod #soap call of duty #mw2 #john mactavish #soap x you #soap x reader #soap smut #soap mw2 #soap mctavish #soap cod #johnny soap mactavish #john soap mctavish x reader #john soap mactavish #cod soap

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v3nusstardust · 4 months

Text

💋”Kiss me”💋

Pairing : Kim Sunoo x you🤍

Genre : Fluff!:3 .. lowkey gets heated at the end tho idk what to call this🗿

Summary : Though it’s been 2 months since you started dating Sunoo, he still has a massive crush on you. All y’all ever did was hold hands, small pecks on the lips & cheeks and sometimes lean on each others shoulders. Even those things were enough to make Sunoo a blushing mess.

It was Sunoo's day off, and he surprised you by showing up at your apartment in the cutest pajamas.

You loved your boyfriend so much, he was so pure and sweet. You greeted him at the door with a hug, “sunoo! You didn’t tell me you were coming!” You exclaimed, wrapped in his embrace. “I missed you.” He planted a small kiss on your forehead, earning a giggle from you. You noticed Sunoo carrying a bag of groceries. “What did you bring?” You asked, peering into the grocery bags. “Oh I brought Mint chocolate chip Ice cream and some of your favorites.” He responded. “Wanna watch some movies?” you suggested. Sunoo nodded in agreement and followed you to your room.

You chatted with your boyfriend in your room and caught up on small things that happened recently. You both sat on your bed away from each other.

To be honest, your boyfriend made you so shy. He was so pretty and perfect and you felt like you were just.. plain. Little did you know, Sunoo felt the same way. You made him so bubbly inside, he never felt that way before, so he didn’t really know how to handle the overwhelming emotions he felt around you.

“What should we watch?” You asked, scrolling through movies. “You pick.” Sunoo replied. “Pick one! I’m indecisive” you giggled. “Okay fine. Horror movie?” He suggested, a mischievous grin on his face. “YES!” You exclaimed excitedly. You scrolled through all the available movies and picked your favorite horror movie.

As the movie started, you and Sunoo maintained a comfortable distance from each other. Sunoo's reassuring presence was everything, but you couldn't help but wonder if your relationship would eventually embrace more physical closeness. His limited free time as an idol added an air of uncertainty, making you ponder the possibility of cuddling or ever being close.

During the movie, a surge of boldness came over you. You knew Sunoo wouldn’t make the first move, plus he looked a little too interested in the movie. Slowly inching closer, you delicately rested your head on his shoulder. “I miss you.” You whispered. Sunoo’s attention went from the movie and onto you. “I missed you too y/n.” His fingers intertwined with yours, tracing soothing circles on your knuckles. “Can I have a kiss?” You asked, looking at him through your eyelashes. Sunoo met your gaze, responding with a swift, sweet peck on the lips. “I want another one.” You laughed shyly. A small giggle escape Sunoo’s lips. He kissed you again, but this time you cradled the back of his head, running your fingers through the softness of his hair.

He pulled away, leaving you with a small pout. You felt needy for more. His face was flushed bright pink.

“I’m… gonna go get your snacks. I’ll be back.” He said hastily before leaving your room.

You sighed as he left. Maybe he didn’t want to kiss you yet? Maybe he wanted to take everything slow and your sudden move scared him.

When he came back, he came back with two bowls of mint chocolate chip ice cream. He sat next to you, handing you the bowl of ice cream and your snacks. You resumed to the movie with your head on his shoulder. You couldn’t focus because your overthinking was bothering you.

In a soft, hushed tone, you asked Sunoo, "Do you love me?" His response came with a reassuring certainty, "Yes, of course I do y/n."

“Do you like kissing me?” You mumbled, but it was loud enough for him to hear. “Of course I do. Why?” Concern flickered in his eyes as he replied. “You left so abruptly earlier. I just wanted our kiss to linger a bit longer than usual. I'm sorry; I just felt a bit needy." you apologized. “No no, I’m sorry. I was afraid of messing up. You're an amazing kisser, trust me. I had to leave because... because you were making me feel .. flustered," he admitted, attempting to look away from you. The confession hung in the air, deepening the connection between you.

You carefully placed your index finger on his chin, making him look you in the eyes. The atmosphere was warm and charged with undeniable tension, hinting at the unspoken desires in the air. You inched your face closer and closer to his. You ran your thumb along his lips, Sunoo was a cute blushing mess.

“Kiss me.” Sunoo shyly mumbled. Your lips met his in a tender embrace. His hands found their way to your waist. You changed your position from sitting next to him to straddling his lap. You threw your arms over his neck, kissing him passionately. His hands were shaking, it was the cutest thing ever. He had one hand on your waist and one gently tangled in your hair. A soft whimper escaped Sunoo’s lips “I love you.”

Before you could reply, his lips slowly started to travel down to your neck. You moaned at the feeling.

“Up, put your hands up for me.” He demanded in a seductive tone, tugging onto your shirt.

You pulled away, your eyes widened in astonishment, your features betraying a surprised expression. Your face was bright red. Sunoo’s eyes were full of lust, but quickly he turned embarrassed once he saw your expression. “I-I’m so sorry! I didn’t even ask first.” He put his hands in his face, trying to hide the blush on his cheeks. “It’s okay..” you placed a soft kiss to his forehead. “I never heard you talk like that.. it took me by surprise. I didn’t say I didn’t like it though.” You chuckled. He swiftly reclaimed your lips, continuing where you left off.

(A/N : omw to my soccer tournament rn and I have to take a pre-game fat shit 🗿if there’s hella mistakes it’s Cus I’m running off a bag of Takis w no water 🗣️.. SOMEONE PLEASE SEND LACTAID PILLS.. lmk if u fw this though bcs I’ve never wrote shit like this bro😝)

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fishsticksloser · 11 months

Text

Heartache

Hobie x gn!reader

Warnings: swearing, angst and no comfort, breakups

A/N: how's this for my first Spiderverse fic? This is also based on the Character AI intro by fairybaby. The intro is written by them, but after that is all me. :) Sorry it's so late... Shit happened :(

Good | Bad

"You miss me yet?" Hobie asks, glancing back at you. His smile is slow, like he knows the answer but wants to hear it from you anyway. "Whenever you want me back, you can have me."

He already apologized—three times—for missing another date. You know he’s busy. Dismantling systems of oppression doesn’t give him a lot of free time. He spends whatever time he can with you, obviously. Even if he doesn’t like labels—you and him are together. It doesn’t matter that you’re a little mad at him.

"Hobie..." You sigh, shake your head. "What are we...? Really, what are we?"

"I don’t do labels," Hobie responds, shifting to meet your gaze. "I think…" He trails off, trying to convey it without sounding mushy or sentimental—both things that he’s not good at expressing. He nods, his voice and his gaze steady. "I think we’re something... Something that can last."

"Then why can't you make time for me?" You ask, looking at him desperately. "What do I actually mean to you?"

"I do make time for you!" He protests, not meeting your gaze suddenly. "I’m busy. I’m a busy guy. I work a lot." He runs a hand over his dreads, sighing to himself. "You know that—I think you just want me to say what I think. You know I feel. You’re really important to me." His voice is quiet.

"You've missed so many dates! Some of which you planned... No call, no text..." You huff, looking away from him, exasperated. "This is the fifth time we've rescheduled over this one date..."

“I know, I’ve apologized!" he replies, his voice sharp. "Look, I’m sorry, okay? I can’t plan my whole day around you—I just can’t." He sighs, shaking his head. Hobie rubs the back of his neck. "You know I like to keep things spontaneous. Hey, I’m sorry, okay? If you’re upset, then that’s on me."

"I don't expect you to plan your whole day around me, Hobart!" You say, a bit angrily. "What I want is for you is to actually show up when you say you will. You... Fuck, Hobie, I haven't seen you in weeks! You texted me about this date and I got so excited... I was so excited to see you and you didn't come... I just... I don't want to be second place to you when you're always first in mine..."

He mutters, his arms crossed over his chest as something inside him starts to burn. "I’m the one who’s busy, I’m the one who does important work—I’m the one who has responsibilities—and that’s how I treat you? Like you're some afterthought? Well, that’s okay." He shakes his head, turning away from you suddenly. "You can find someone else to put you first." His gaze hardens, and he starts to walk away.

"You're first place in my life... I always put you first. I always make time for you, Hobie." You say softly, you wrap your arms around yourself protectively. "I don't want someone else. I want you, but you don't seem to want me at all, do you?"

"You think I don’t want you?" His voice rises. He stops, not looking at you. "Do you have any idea how important you are to me? How much I care about you?" He lets out an angry growl before he speaks again. Hobie whirls to face you, an angry fire in his eyes. "Don’t you dare say that I don’t care about you. How dare you! I have other things to do besides go on dates with you!"

"If I'm so important to you, why can't you make time for me!?" You yell back. "You think it's just dates!? I... I haven't seen you in almost a month, you hardly ever text me, no calls. What am I supposed to think?" You sigh and close your eyes, reigning in your anger. "I understand what you do is important, but I put things aside for you because you're important to me. I... I can't keep going like this, Hobie. I need you. Not all the time, but sometimes..."

"I have a life, Y/N!" He responds, his eyes glaring and blazing as you yell at him. "You’re not all of my life, you know! I have my music, I have my activism, I have… I have—" Hobie pauses, letting out a breath of exhaustion. His voice now softer, quieter.. "Look, I care about you. I really do. I’m sorry I don’t make you a bigger part of my life, but I’ve got a lot going on right now, okay?"

"Then let me help!" You tell him desperately, stepping closer to him. "Whatever we are, it's... It's part of what we do is help each other... I... I want to help you, Hobie. But I can't when you just leave me, I can't when you ghost me. Whatever we are, we're in this together. If you can't trust me with that then why are we even together?"

He lets out a breath of frustration, shaking his head as you approach him, the anger in his voice giving way to the weariness inside him. "I don’t need any help." He says curtly, not meeting your gaze. "I don’t want any help," he mutters before speaking up again. "You’re right. Why are we even together if I can’t trust you? Maybe this whole thing was a mistake," he continues, his voice laced with disappointment and sadness. "I think this was a mistake."

You watch Hobie walk away before you go home and lay in bed. You put your hand in the pocket of his hoodie you're wearing and pull out something. It’s a shiny, slightly metallic spider totem, smooth to the touch and small enough to fit in your whole hand. It's a funny little gift you'd gotten him after he told you he was Spider-Man. It’s polished to a near-mirror sheen thanks to the amount of times Hobie rubbed his thumb against it whenever he was nervous. But now, looking at it brings only more questions—and questions lead to guilt.

If he cared about you, he’d fight harder for your relationship.

That’s what you told yourself, but you couldn’t help but doubt every time your thoughts wandered down that path.

What if he just didn’t care? What if he didn’t love you? What if you were just a burden on him? What if he could have better than you? What if he didn’t need you?

He did care about you. He really, truly did. He was just… preoccupied. Life got in the way, so often. He was busy, he was so busy. There were so many things to do, so many problems to solve. He wanted to share all of that with you, but how could he? How could he find time to be with you, when there was so much else to do? He wanted you. He wanted to be with you. But his heart said one thing while his brain said another.

Hobie wasn’t the best at communicating, that’s for sure. He was so used to being on his own, being independent and self-sufficient, that he forgot his actions—or his inaction—had the potential to hurt people around him. He wasn’t the best at letting people in, at all. He wasn’t the best at letting people stay. He was too afraid, too cowardly to admit all of those things. But if you’re willing to stick with him… he just might learn to be better.

#spider man: across the spider verse #sony spiderverse #hobie spiderverse #beyond the spiderverse #spiderman #hobie x reader #hobie brown #hobie x you #spiderpunk #spiderpunk x you #spiderpunk x y/n #spiderpunk x reader #hobie brown x reader #hobie brown x you #hobie brown x y/n

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dixons-sunshine · 1 month

Note

hiii, i just discovered your blog recently and i adore it, your writtings are very amazing😭, i was just wondering if you could possible write about daryl with a brazilian reader? like she has a big curly hair and is very optimistic and happy most of the time? i am from brazil and i never really found any writtings about my country, but i would apreciate if you write something about it🙌🏽, sorry for my bad english

Feel The Rhythm In Your Soul | Daryl Dixon x Fem! Brazilian!Reader

Summary: Of all the things you thought would happen at Deanna Monroe's party, being asked to dance by your quiet, shy partner wasn't what you expected. And you certainly didn't expect to have to teach him how to dance.

Genre: Fluff.

Era: Alexandria, pre Saviour arc.

Warnings: Swearing.

Word count: 830.

A/n: Finally finished this request. Sorry for the long wait :'). This was really fun to write, though! Also, I'm sorry if any Portuguese translations are incorrect. I used Google translate for this. If anything is wrong, please let me know and I'll fix it! (Translations will be at the bottom.)

➳༻❀✿❀༺➳

“Daryl, calma. You won't be able to move right if you're so tense.”

Daryl huffed and crossed his arms over his chest, giving you a frustrated look. “M'not tense. Dancin' s'jus' fuckin' impossible.”

You shook your head and gave him a huge smile. You stepped behind him and readjusted his body, before stepping in front of him again. “It's not impossible. You just got to become one with the music. Feel the rhythm in your soul, and let your body do the rest. Don't overthink it too much.”

Daryl grumbled something under his breath before sighing. “Alrigh'. Show me again,” he nodded, his lips twitching up at the small squeal of delight you emitted.

Sometimes he wondered how someone as pessimistic and brooding like him got lucky enough to get with someone as energetic and full of life as you. Despite everything you've endured in this cruel, unforgiving world, you remained optimistic, hopeful, full of life.

You remained his happy girl.

“Incrível,” you replied happily. “Just follow my lead, okay?”

“Alrigh',” Daryl responded. He tried his best to follow your slow movements, trying to get it perfect for you just to hear that beautiful laugh of yours again.

When he had asked you to teach him how to do one of your traditional dances, you had excitedly pulled him aside to teach him something called a Samba, even if the music wasn't exactly the best to do it to. From what you had told him, you were only teaching him the basics. Basic footwork and basic handwork.

Basic my ass, he thought to himself as he struggled to follow your lead. He had never danced before and was beginning to realise that he had two left feet when it came to this activity. However, despite having been trying to teach him for half an hour, you refused to write him up as a lost cause. You'd simply smile brightly, beautiful eyes sparkling up at him while you reassured him that he would get it right soon. You were endearing to him like that.

Surprisingly, Daryl had managed to follow your instructions without any hiccups this time around. He had actually done pretty well, considering his inability to dance. He was kind of proud of himself. And so were you.

“Bom trabalho, garoto lindo! Você está conseguindo!” you exclaimed happily, throwing yourself into his arms and hugging him tightly.

Ignoring the looks the other shallow minded Alexandrians were sending his way, he smiled softly and embraced you gently. He wasn't one for public displays of affection, preferring to keep that part of your lives private. However, when you were this excited and sent him that absolutely radiant smile of yours, he couldn't be bothered. You were his perfect girl.

“Peach, ya know I love it when ya speak Portuguese, but yer strictly English speaking partner needs a translation,” he whispered into your long, curly hair, smiling at the giggle you let out.

“Sorry. I was just saying that you were doing it. You completed one basic Samba routine,” you explained, pulling back from the hug to look at him. “I'm so proud of you. You'll be doing full Samba routines with me in no time.”

Daryl gave you a small smile. “M'lookin' forward to it,” he responded, suddenly looking quite nervous. “But m'done fer tonigh'. Vamos para casa, linda.”

You gasped in surprise, before smiling widely. “Daryl, did you just—”

“Speak Portuguese?” he finished for you, nodding hesitantly. “Yeah. I found a book and have been tryna learn fer ya. Y'know, so ya can speak yer language more often and have someone understand ya.”

Happy tears started to well up in your eyes. You stepped forward and softly embraced him, resting your head against his chest.

“Muito obrigada. I love you so much,” you whispered against his chest.

A beat of silence passed. Daryl pressed a soft kiss to the top of your head, feeling his heart begin to flutter uncontrollably. He closed his eyes and focused really hard, recalling one of the first things he taught himself to say in your language.

“Eu também te amo.”

➳༻❀✿❀༺➳

Translations (BASED ON GOOGLE TRANSLATE! I DON'T SPEAK PORTUGUESE SO THIS IS MOST LIKELY INCORRECT. Please feel free to comment the correct translations for me and I will fix it!)

Calma: Calm down.

Incrível: Incredible.

Bom trabalho, garoto lindo! Você está conseguindo!: Good job, pretty boy! You're doing it!

Vamos para casa, linda: Let's go home, beautiful.

Muito obrigada: Thank you so much.

Eu também te amo: I love you too.

#krys writes .ೃ࿐#daryl dixon #daryl dixon x reader #daryl dixon imagine #daryl dixon x female reader #daryl x reader #the walking dead #twd daryl #norman reedus #norman reedus x reader

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dr0p-dead-gorgeous · 6 months

Text

Josh Futturman x fem!reader

Warnings: sub!josh,smut , p in v, Premature ejaculation,overstimulation, fem pronouns and anatomy used, use of y/n , not really proofread

You run into a cute,dorky guy at work,

As i wonder about my day, i accidentally bump into a sort of dorky guy. As we both stop and turn to apologize to each other, I notice his name tag reading ‘Futturman, Janitor.’ “I am *so sorry*” the Janitor says before apologizing profusely.”I'm sorry, it's fine really Mr.. Uhh.. Futturman. “Call me Josh, everyone else does” the Janitor says as he blushes a bit. “...Josh, I'm y/n, a vet tech for the possums around here, seen you around a bit, Josh blushes a bit and chuckles“Well…uh…nice to *meet* you, y/n.” Josh says, unsure of what to say."Nice to meet you I gotta go " I say with a sweet smile, Josh smiles back nervously “Of course…uh, you have a nice day y/n.” Josh says before awkwardly attempting to continue on with his day.

(third person pov)

Over the next week’s they talked in passing becoming quick friends

[Cut to Josh taking a break from cleaning the cafeteria and having lunch with her]

You like Video games too! I love playing *Josh blushes a bit, and smiles enthusiastically* “Oh, yeah! You play Biotic Wars?”. “Yeah! I'm on level 50! Lately ive been playing a lot of resident evil though!" 'I love resident evil! M..maybe you could come over to hang out and watch me play sometimes!” Josh suggests nervously "Sounds good! " y/n says ,Josh smiles, clearly very nervous and excited for the first time in a long time having anyone over, especially a girl. His mind races from the surprise of the date and future plans.

‘Wow…someone like *y/n* actually wants to visit my *house*. What am I going to do?’ Josh thinks to himself.*

Josh and y/n later visit his home. Josh nervously opens his door, ushering her to come inside. She walks in, and takes in his space, clearly enjoying his gaming setup and decor.*I love your posters! I have the same one of Tiger by my bed*Josh blushes a bit once again* “Oh…that’s uh…well…” *He points at his gaming console* “Do you wanna see something really cool?” “yeah! “ Josh smiles nervously and turns on his game resident evil. He then proceeds to show Y/n his final boss victory and the end-game content. Y/n is enthralled by the gameplay, clearly impressed by his prowess. “Omg you beat it! I thought it was impossible i've died so many times! "Josh blushes and jumps up exited“Oh my god… I beat it” He seems pleased with himself for completing the game with Y/n present they hug and he spins her around celebrating.He puts her down her hands on his shoulders for a moment they look into each other's eyes. She leans over and whispers “Hey, you’re really cute and charming josh, you know that?” Josh blushes and looks very stunned for a moment; then his face lights up red like a tomato.*Josh blushes a crazy amount as Y/n continues* “If I were to…*maybe*...kiss you right now…would you…be okay with that~?” *Josh’s face is as red as the sun, but he responds* “Uh…Yeah..! I would be okay with that…really!” She slowly leans in and Josh leans in as well. They embrace in a slow and tender kiss. Josh’s cheeks light up red and he blushes. “I think I really like you josh.” Josh’s heart beats as fast as a humming bird’s. He holds Y/n’s face with a shaking hand and looks her right into the eyes. He stares deeply into her own, and gives her another soft kiss. His hands begin to quiver. “Y/n…” Josh stutters, clearly flustered. “Uhh…I think I really like you too…”*Josh leans in to kiss y/n again, this time more passionately, a smile spreading across his face. Their kiss grows more heated, and y/n pulls Josh closer into a tight embrace. She starts to rub his thighs leaning more into him*Josh’s body shivers from the feeling, never having been in this situation before. He starts to feel a little anxious, his breathing increasing slightly. His heart’s beating out of his chest and his face is almost red as an apple. y/n kisses Josh passionately and continues to move her hands over his body. As she does, she begins unbuttoning Josh’s shirt…*Is this ok Josh... Josh’s body is shaking profusely at this point. He nods nervously, unable to communicate with words. y/n pulls him in closer.*y/n pushes her hand onto Josh’s chest, pushing him onto his bed feeling his heart beating rapidly. She looks at Josh with a hungry smile, her mind set on going even further. He begins breathing even faster and slightly heavier.*y/n whispers seductively into Josh’s ear “It’s getting hot in here…” *She unbuttons his shirt the rest of the way, and proceeds to caress his bare chest with a soft kiss. Josh’s mind goes blank and his heart beats out of his chest, unable to form coherent thoughts.*y/n runs her hands over Josh’s chest again, this time moving to his waist and slowly removing his pants. She kisses him again, and whispers once more “Can…can I?”Josh gulps loudly, extremely nervous and unsure of what to do. He responds “Uhh…” Josh’s heart is beating at breakneck speed. All of his blood rushes to his face as his body shakes uncontrollably. He tries pulling himself away Y/n’s seductive voice grows more clear. “Is that a no?” She continues to inch her body closer, clearly still looking to escalate the situation. Josh’s mind goes blank as his heart races. He can’t say anything.

“I can't do anything more if I don't get a yes baby” *Josh’s mouth dries up and he nods frantically* “Y-Yes! Yes please..

”Good boy using your words hun. *Josh’s face lights up red at the fact that Y/n called him “Good boy” and “hun”. He starts to feel a little uncomfortable in his underwear by the level of intimacy, but clearly still aroused by her.* Y/n moves herself closer, taking off her shirt and and skirt left in her Lacey underwear siting on-top of Josh. She bites her lip as she continues.* “Is this okay…?*Josh gulps nervously. His eyes flutter for a moment as he nods, . All of his thoughts disappear and he lets his body take control.**Y/n pulls Josh closer as she grinds herself onto him through his boxers. He gasps slightly with an intense feeling of euphoria and intimacy. His brain goes fully blank and he can’t seem to form any coherent thoughts.**Y/n moves slowly in his lap, her touch being more and more seductive. She leans in to give him another passionate kiss, her lips slowly moving down to his neck as she begins to Seep through her panties. Josh let’s out a whine bucking into her,loving the sweet friction on his fully hard cock. He fumbles with her bra strap before getting it off groping her chest harshly as she let’s out little moans. She lifts up causing Josh to whine in protest, she take off her panties before doing the same for Josh. She lower herself down rubbing herself on Josh, he yelps out from the sudden sensation, shuttering from the pleasure cursing under his breath. She reaches down and takes him in her hand, giving him a few pumps before lining him up with her entrance and slowly sinking down on him.

With a couple thrusts He moans out loudly “ Fuck fuck fuck… y.. Your so t… tight i’m gonna..” He moans almost pornographicly and cums inside her immediately, mortified he begins to apologize “Fuck i’m so sorry! y… your just so pretty and.. and feel so good… this is my first time i-”she shut him up by kissing him and rolling her hips. Continuing to slowly roll her hips she says “ Fuck no it’s ok that was so hot keep moaning like that for me baby wanna fuck you till you cry ”she starts slowly bouncing on his still hard cock as he unraveled a whiney little mess. She fucked herself on his cock hitting the bundle of nerves each time “Thank you.. F.. Fuck …thank you please don't stop riding me like that your so perfect “ she bounced on him each trust dragging against her sensitive walls” fuuuck baby boy you feel so good are you close ““ so..so close please let me cum please, i’ll be a good boy I promise just please let me cum…ahh~”he moaned “Fuck since you moaned so pretty for me baby go ahead and cum baby c'mon” “Fuck, thank you, thank you uhH~” his cum flooded inside her while her walls clamped down around him reaching her climax.She kept going, riding out her orgasm, much to josh's surprise . 'F..fuck Y/n~ its so much!".She finally begins to slow down eventially coming to a complete stop, her hands of his chest as he panted under her.

"That was so good thank you" he said still recovering. She lifted off him with a hiss laying herself down on his chest, his hand immediately wrapping around her to cuddle"You did so well baby" she responded nuzzling her head into him. they sat in comfortable silence holding each other for a couple minutes

"Sooo..next time you want to watch me beat Biotic wars?"

#josh futturman x reader #future man x reader #josh hutcherson #josh futturman #josh hutcherson smut

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bangchansgirlsblog · 3 months

Text

The assistant.

"Chan?" Her footsteps followed quickly behind him trying to keep up with him as we walked into the dressing rooms.

"Yeah?" He replied dryly as he sat into the makeup artists chair after saying a quick hello.

"You have a meeting with Eunwo and the PR tea-"

"Y/n honestly I don't have time for this right now. You see I have a show in a few minutes and you decide to tell me all this now?" He scoffed and looked up from his phone.

"No Chan it's just that-"

"Just that what? Look your a great assistant and all but your sometimes so uncoordinated. Do you really expect me to remember all the meetings I have?" He glared up at her.

She was wearing her usual knitted sweater, tight pencil skirt and some lofers. Her hair was up in a bun and she held her IPad and Chan's bag one in each hand.

"I'm sorry, it won't happen again," she hung her head low and looked at the floor.

"Good, now go sit on the couch and sit there looking pretty," he stated and went back to scrolling on his phone. Y/n was so confused because he would be so nice to her and then be the worst person to her at the same time. It was so confusing- "oh and for God's sake Y/n what do I say about your sweater? It's ugly, I can't have my assistant walking around in such. Get rid of it. You know what, I'll even take you shopping,"

"Y/n get me water please," she heard his voice call for her.

Nope. He wouldn't see her as anything more. She accepted it and she was getting exhausted.

The rooms were all lit and they all had different people in them doing different things so it was very confusing for her to note where what was.

Who was she? Was she pretty?

"I'm here to pick up Chan's friend," she smiled as she told one of the popular and most familiar guards.

"Oh, Chan has a new friend now?" He teased.

"Yeah I geuss, I've never met her before. Do you see her anywhere out there?"

"Hey! You must be Chan's assistant," ouch, assistant? Was that all she was? "I'm Min-Ji but everyone calls me Jiji," she smiled and put out her hand for a shake.

"I'm Y/n. The assistant," she shook the hand quickly and led her to Chan's changing room.

"This is really such a big place," Min-Ji commented as they where making their way down the corridors.

"Yeah it is,"

"How long have you been working for Chan?" She asked trying to make conversation.

"About 6 years,"

"Do you have any advice? You know...for me?" That made Y/n start to slow down her pace because what was she trying to say?

"What do you mean?"

Oh.

"Chan she's here," y/n knocked on the door and slowly pushed it open.

"Ahhh, great! Min-Ji! Hey love," he smiled and moved away from the stylist to give her a hug,

"Hey Channie! Long time no see," she giggled.

"How are you? Please take a seat, I still have a lot before I get ready. Y/n please, get her a drink," Chan said.

"Ofcourse," she smiled through her teeth. Deep down she wanted to die as she watched the two interact and be all touchy. That should be her but..

She's just an assistant.

"Y/n!" Someone yelled for her making her jump a little, "what are you doing outside?! Get Chan and let's go!" One of the managers yelled as he walked up the corridor towards her.

"Sir? Sir he's in there with someone-"

"Sir I tried to tell him, but his with-"

"Get him in the bus now. I don't want your excuses," he shoved past her making sure to hit her shoulder. Her hand automatically rub the area. Her feelings were now even more emotional than before.

She had tried warning Chan but instead of understanding Chan yelled at and now she got yelled at again. Was anyone going to actually be nice for once?

She quickly knocked on the door and prayed that Chan wouldn't be pissed off. Maybe he would be in a good mood to be rushed.

"Chan we really need to go! Please just come out," she begged.

"5 more minutes!" He replied.

The tears wouldn't stop as she looked at him, analyzing him and trying to find some type of reason to run away and hide.

"Hey, do you think that..." he trailed off as he turned to look at his assistant. Worry quickly filled him as he made his way to her. "Hey? What's wrong?"

Why did he care? Y/n thought.

"Did someone do something? Why are you crying?" He looked down both sides of the corridors and saw that no one was there, so what was really going on?

"N-nothing," she shrugged his hands off her body and made her way inside but was stopped by a hand grabbing her arm.

"I've never seen you cry before so something has to be wrong-"

"I'm just your assistant," she sobbed. Chan was taken back because yes she was his assistant but that's not what she was to him.

"What do you mean?" He asked. His feelings now getting worked up but he couldn't help but ask why? Why was he getting so worked up after seeing her upset.

"Y/n, love. Tell me what the matter is, I won't tell anyone,"

"L-let's go," she breathed. Her chest pumping up and down at a high pace.

"Can we talk about what's made you upset?" Chan asked softly.

"Chan not now, please..."

"Later?" He asked hopeful and he got a head shake in response but he was satisfied with it.

"Can you atleast calm down for me? Just breathe," he took a few steps closer until he was towering over her. His hand land by her arms and he rubbed them trying to calm her down. It was working but the intense eye contact he was holding with her was scaring her. Her brain was foggy as she silently got lost into his eyes. Little did she know he was also getting lost in her eyes. He slowly analyzed her facial structure....he found her beautiful? The tension grew as he kept whispering encouraging words so she could calm down

until she did it.

She got on her tippy toes and kissed him he instantly kissed back and when she realized what she was doing she pulled away. Adrenaline run through her body as he looked at her shocked.

"Woah," was all he was able to say to her.

Embarrassment grew in her chest before she knew it she was running out with door. She run to fast that she couldn't hear Chan's calls for her.

She entered the bus and sat in one of the empty sits and covered her head with her hoodie and pretended to sleep.

What the hell was that?

#skz channie #skz imagines #skz comfort #skz x reader #skz angst #skz fluff #skz x y/n #skz x you #skz drabbles #skz stay #stray kids drabbles #bangchansgfblog #bang chan angst #bangchan #bangchan angst #bangchan x reader #bangchan fluff #bang chan x reader

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literaila · 2 years

Text

just barely

tasm!peter x fem!reader

summary:

“okay, peter. are you afraid of spiders?” “no.” “then can you go get the one in my apartment?”

warnings: angst, grief, mentions of gwen, arachnophobia, fluff. neighbors au.

a/n: i am. so sorry. and actually i love this one so much so feed my ego, thanks

peter met you four months into college.

sitting in his apartment, sewing up a suit that he should've gotten rid of years ago. pricking his fingers with the needle and telling himself that he was going to be more careful this time.

he never was.

and when you knocked on his door for the first time, he pricked his finger again.

he almost swore out loud--flinging his hand in the air like the pain was going to fall off--but briefly remembered how thin the walls were.

maybe because he could hear you breathing on the other side.

it was late. peter always knew when it was late.

and it was raining. he was inside because it was raining.

and someone was knocking on his door.

peter, with his finger in his mouth, sucking away the very essence of his life and every ounce of patience he had, did not want to deal with it.

he didn't quite feel like a human being that night.

and besides, if it wasn't someone delivering a pizza to his door--no, he didn't order but he might pay if that was the case--peter didn't want to know.

and then there was another knock.

so peter, begrudgingly, sliding on a jacket because he was only in sweatpants, went to the door.

just barely sighed as he swung it open.

and there you stood. dripping from the rain.

"hi," you said, the word quick, breathless, like an afterthought. "we haven't met. i'm y/n. i moved in two weeks ago. i've seen you carrying books around and coming in late sometimes but i haven't--" you took a breath in. shook your head. "nevermind. my point is, i'm y/n."

peter stood there. unsure what to say. he barely took it all in.

he stared at you and your shaking hands and dripping hair.

he wondered how you got on his doorstep.

"okay," you said, in lack of an answer. "this is really weird. you probably think i'm crazy. which was... not my goal."

"i don't think you're--"

"i have arachnophobia."

peter blinked.

"and it sounds crazy--because it is--but there's a spider in my apartment and i just--i can't. i'm cold, and i just got home from work, and there's a spider, like, right by the door, and i can't get it. or walk through the door." you paused, staring at him with wide eyes. "because i'm crazy."

in a lack of words or any description for this situation, peter ran a hand over his jaw.

he watched water drip from your hair. drip on the ground.

you blinked at him. "you have a cut on your thumb, by the way."

peter looked at his hand. clenched his fist until it was so tight that pain meant nothing but a blur of emotion.

"oh," he said, stupidly, unknowing. "yeah, i know."

you cleared your throat. "what's your name?"

"peter."

"okay, peter. are you afraid of spiders?"

he might've laughed at the irony, if not given the fact that any conversation skills--that he may or may not have had--seemed to evade him.

"no," he shook his head. "no--i, um. no."

you breathed out, laughing a bit manically. "would you help me with the spider in my apartment then? i'm sorry to bother you, really, but i would like to change my clothes."

"oh," he said, again, stupidly. "sure. sure."

"you will?"

he shook his head. tried to put on a smile that didn't exist. "yeah, of course."

the words were slow and slurred and nothing like he'd meant them to be.

peter, just barely, recognized the fact that you were his age. that you were pretty.

and that you looked almost insane. like you'd said.

"thank you," you breathed out in relief. "do you want to... um, put some shoes on first? if you're busy i can--"

"probably shouldn't try anyone else," peter responded, assuming and stupid, and just. "it's three in the morning. i don't think they're awake."

you opened your mouth, maybe to say something--peter couldn't tell--and then shut it.

you stared at him like you were sure he was lying.

like you were annoyed with him.

he cleared his throat, walking forward a bit, and simultaneously pushing you back. "i don't need my shoes. uh, lead the way."

he shut the door quietly behind him.

you nodded. taking ten steps forward to the apartment right across from his.

"you live right there?"

while unlocking the door, you nodded your head. water dripping onto your shoes.

peter briefly considered that he was an asshole.

"why haven't i seen you before?"

you looked back at him, swallowing. "i usually work night shifts. um, i mean, i've seen you before, so."

peter nodded his head dumbly.

and then you took a step back, staring at him.

expectedly.

"oh, you want me to go first?"

"please."

so peter walked through, searching the floors for any specimen that he may or may not have been related to.

you just barely followed behind him. slightly lagging.

"where was it?"

"the wall in the back. it was big."

peter looked back at you, a bit concerned by how nervous you looked just from walking through the door.

"i don't see it."

peter looked up and down the walls. followed his feet to the floor, making sure that he hadn't stepped on anything.

and this is the point where he figured that he'd leave. let you get back to your business.

maybe think about being more cordial to his neighbors.

but you just barely said his name. quiet against the rain.

he looked at you. "hmm?"

"this is ridiculous, but, would you just--just look for it. like. in the other room. i won't be able to fall asleep, and--"

peter was quick to nod. "yeah. i got it."

and so he searched through your living room. feeling only slightly weird that he was looking through a stranger's house, while said stranger stood right at the doorway.

but after around three minutes, he noticed a spider crawling on the opposite side of the wall. about an inch big.

but he wasn't judging.

"okay," he called to you, allowing the bug to crawl up his hand. "i got it."

"the window doesn't have a screen."

peter allowed himself a quick laugh--because, above all else, this was the weirdest three am he'd had in a while--and let the spider crawl outside, whispering a quick goodbye.

and then he walked back to you, scratching at his thumb.

you awkwardly thanked him, reaching your hand out to shake his.

when peter stared for a moment, confused, you dropped it.

and then you waited.

and peter probably should've just left your apartment.

that was what a considerate neighbor might do.

"you're really that afraid of spiders?"

"um, yeah," you shook your head, scratched at the back of your neck, and looked more uncomfortable than peter had ever seen another person. "it's--it's a feeling thing."

peter tilted his head, curious.

"well, like, just imagining them crawling around. or up and down my skin." you shivered, and peter assumed it wasn't from the cold. "i mean, i know that most spiders can't do any harm."

peter coughed.

"but still... it's hard to explain."

"no," peter nodded, watching as your eyes fluctuated from the wall to him, from the ground to the ceiling. "i understand. they're creepy."

"i guess. i know that they're important. thanks for not killing that one."

peter just barely blinked.

"well," you said, smiling at him. "you should go to sleep. i'm sorry for keeping you up."

"it's no problem." peter swore.

he'd forgotten all about the rain. or his suit. or the tiny little cut on his thumb.

"have a good night, peter. thanks for your help."

you smiled at him--this time, sincere and appreciative--one last time.

peter met you four months into college. he'd whispered his goodbyes in the rain and was unfathomably interested in his neighbor.

and maybe he'd always known that he was going to fall in love with you.

"hey," you whisper, late enough for the words to feel strange on his spine.

"hey," he says back, but only because it's what he should do.

you run your fingers along his forearm, leaving terror in your wake.

"how are you?"

you ask him.

and peter can't really answer that.

when peter saw you again, it was with his backpack slung over his shoulder.

with papers and the weight of thousands of dollars in debt piling up in one bag that probably shouldn't have been carrying it all.

but when you smiled at him, peter shrugged it off, and just smiled back.

"hey," you said, quickly and carefully, unlocking your door. "how are you?"

"good." peter nodded. "um, you?"

you laughed, maybe because of the long pause between the words. "i'm okay. it's nice to be out with the sun."

"yeah. haven't seen you around."

"not like you did before, either."

peter nodded again. his eyebrows were ready to run right off of his face.

you were carrying bags in your hands, one on the ground, turning back around to your door because peter hadn't offered anything significant to you.

so he cleared his throat. "did you--do you want some help?"

you looked down at the ground, seemingly surprised by your own grocery bags. "oh, yeah." eyes met his. "i don't want to bother you again."

"it's no bother."

and so peter picked up the bag on the ground. he reached his hand out and barely felt it when your fingers passed his.

or when you smiled at him, grateful again.

"i don't mean to keep using you," you said to him, finally unlocking your door. "you just seem to be there."

"it's only twice."

you nodded, moving back so that he could walk in. "for now."

peter snorted, feeling uncomfortable as his shoes hit your carpet.

"i like your apartment, by the way. it's nice."

more trinkets than his. a home full of things that peter didn't recognize.

and still, it was brighter than his apartment.

you lead him into the kitchen, pointing to where he should set the bags down.

peter could feel your eyes on him. sort of creeping. sort of subdued in a casual way.

"thanks. i like it," you answer. "or, i like it when there aren't any bugs crawling around."

peter let his lips twitch. he moved back, giving you the room to start putting the perishables away.

"are you always getting pulled into everyone else's apartments?" you asked him, biting your lip and looking up.

your eyes were quick, lit, and less emphasized than they'd been when it was three in the morning.

peter frowned. "what?"

"yesterday i helped someone move a couch into their apartment. and last week mrs. rivers needed some help with her tv. i just meant that you seem helpful. dependable." you shrugged. "do people ask you for help a lot?"

"no, not really," peter answered, words still confused. "i don't 'run into' people very often. and i don't think they would ask me."

you blinked, closing a cabinet and turning away from him.

"why not?"

"i don't know anyone very well."

peter breathed out and you hummed, unbagging things that peter couldn't see.

"sometimes mr. smith from down the hall asks me to water his plants when he goes to see his son."

you nodded, like this made perfect sense to you.

"but that's about it."

"how long have you lived here?"

"almost five months."

"hmm."

you emptied another bag, not watching as peter leaned against your counter.

he felt like he should go. that he was intruding on some boundary that he shouldn't have been.

but he stayed because you hadn't asked him to leave.

"what?" he asked, shaking his head.

"are you a busy person?"

in this game of twenty questions, peter seemed to be answering everything.

and ignoring the gentle curiosity aimed his way.

to complain would be hypocritical.

"i guess. school and work. why?"

you shrugged, again. "that's probably why you don't know your neighbors. if you're not here a lot..."

peter crossed his arms. there was something in your tone of voice. something in your eyes and strange way of speaking.

"i know my neighbors."

you just barely smiled. "yeah?"

"yeah. you're y/n. you've lived here four weeks, and you're afraid of spiders."

you laughed. "that doesn't count."

peter frowned. licked his lips and let the adrenaline control any next statement.

"mr. smith lives in 3C. he's got two kids. if you listen late enough at night you can hear him calling his son in florida."

you looked at him again, pausing.

so peter continued.

"ms. baker is divorced. she got the cat, which is good because she loves that cat more than life itself. she makes brownies and then leaves them to rot on her windowsill. or she used to. until she started leaving them in the mail room."

you laughed. leaned against the counter next to him and crossed your ankles.

"david, the building manager, loves halloween. if he could, he would decorate the whole place. but it's a fire hazard, so he just decorates the laundry room."

"isn't that a fire hazard too?"

peter considered it. "probably."

you laughed again.

"the girl in 6B, moira, is a single mom. her daughter doesn't like thunderstorms, so she's always crying. unless moira swaddles her and puts on old sixties music. and mrs. alvera gets flowers every week. jason blasts music on the weekends but no one complains because everyone is scared of him."

peter continued. he wasn't thinking about leaving.

"there's a little boy down the hall, henry, who loves trains. his dad sends him some in the mail. mr. johnson has a dog who he hates."

and there's something in your eyes.

peter breathed out, chest a bit tight. he'd never been very good at defeat.

"so," he said.

"so?"

"so i know my neighbors."

you smiled at him. turned towards the fridged and grabbed two water bottles, one to offer to him.

he took it, but only for something to do with his hands.

"and you're peter," you say, slowly.

"parker."

"peter parker. you're always coming and going at odd times. you're a student--probably at esu--and you're nice."

and then peter smiled. he was willing to admit that.

"what're you doing?" you ask him, stepping into the room and dropping your bag on the floor.

peter barely flinches at the sound.

he blinks up at the clock, noticing numbers that he should have an hour ago.

"hey," he says, dumbly. "you're home."

you lean down to kiss his head. he can feel your smile. "yeah. what're you doing?"

"just fixing some holes."

peter gestures down to the suit. looks up at you and tries not to falter at your eyes.

you’re staring at him.

you look tired, had been at work all day, and still--you offered him a smile.

the same sweet smile he'd been getting for a year and a half.

"don't hurt yourself," you whisper to him, laughing just a bit.

peter looks down at the needle between his fingers.

he barely just caught the joke as you walk out of the room to go change into your work clothes.

and theres the tiniest part of him that feels relieved for the silence.

relieved to not have to stare at you.

and face the goddamn reality.

peter had been getting used to the knocks on his door.

he recognized your specific weight, the sequences, and cadence in whatever you needed from him.

and he wasn't as hesitant to open the door.

"hey, peter," you said to him, a bit breathless. "do you have a wrench?"

peter blinked. "what?"

you made a strange hand gesture. "you know, the thing that you twist stuff with?"

peter's brow furrowed. he opened the door a little bit more, noticing your wet pants and the lack of shoes or socks.

"i know what a wrench is," he said. "why do you need it?"

"sink's leaking."

his lips pursed. he waited for more of an explanation, but you offered him none.

"yeah," he said, finally. "i have a wrench. come in."

and then he swung the door open and left you to fend with it yourself.

and listened to your footsteps as you followed him to his supply closet.

"i don't think i've ever been in here," you said from behind him, voice echoing in his empty hallway. "not what i expected."

peter looked back at you with a raised brow.

you raised your hands in defense. "you seem like a poster kind of guy."

"there's a poster in my room."

"of what?"

"a spider."

you scoffed from behind him, and peter had to pay close attention to his face--just so that he didn't laugh back.

he dug through his shelves, looking for a tool kit that he'd hidden away.

unused, because he didn't want it.

because he didn't need it anymore.

"here," he said, handing you the wrench, initials branded on the side.

"why thank you, peter parker."

you smiled up at him, a mark on the side of your face--peter couldn't tell what it was.

"sure," he agreed, shutting the closet behind him. "why don't you just call maintenance?"

"hmm?"

"for your sink."

"oh, um. well, i need to use it. and it's almost six so there's no time to call."

"do you know how to fix a sink?" peter allowed a cautious raise of his brow. a curiosity that he wasn't really allowed appeared in his throat, swallowed right back down by guilt.

"i know how to use google."

"so no."

you raised a finger at him, looking defensive. "it can't be that hard."

peter laughed.

"what?"

"i hope that your apartment doesn't flood."

"mean, peter," you frowned at him. "i could have a talent for fixing sinks."

and then you turned around, leaving him no room to argue, and headed for the door. calling another thank you as you opened it.

but peter opened his mouth before you could leave.

"why didn't you ask?"

you turned back, wide eyes. "what?"

"if i could help. you didn't ask."

"can you fix a sink?"

"yes."

peter would've liked to lie. maybe if you had been any other person, he might've.

you grinned. "i've already used you enough. i'm working on my dependency."

peter shrugged. "never hurts to ask."

your lip twitched the barest amount.

you played with his wrench, swinging it from hand to hand. "i'll bring this back."

"okay."

peter let the interest fall off of his shoulders and onto the ground.

he had things he needed to do. like, putting a cup of mac and cheese into the microwave.

and read for his class tomorrow.

and consider every failure he'd ever made.

but you called his name, just once more.

"yeah?" he opened the door, a little bit wider.

"wanna help me fix my sink?"

peter, now, considers that you might've been pitying him. poor peter, all alone on a saturday night.

but then he just blindly nodded.

forgot all about consequences.

"peter, you can't just get ice cream."

peter looks down at his shopping bag. he frowns. "there's chips too."

"where are the meals?"

he smiles at you. "in your basket."

"we already agreed that i'm not cooking for you anymore."

peter pretends to consider this. "you know, i actually changed my mind about that. statistically, you probably won't burn down my apartment again."

"statistically, i'm going to hit you one of these days."

peter holds a hand to his heart, mock offended. "violence," he protests, taking a step back as you try and push him.

"go get something to eat."

"i'm going to eat all of this."

"okay," you grin at him. "go get something that you probably won't eat."

peter groans. this time, you actually push him.

"we'll order pizza tonight if you get some actual groceries."

"why are you always nagging me?"

peter says it, but with a smile on his face.

you laugh back at him. pat his cheek like you're his grandmother. "go."

peter sighs and listens.

and it's fine. for today.

surely enough, peter couldn't manage to avoid you.

it might've been that you lived right across from him. peter realized that.

or it might've been the world, laughing and laughing at him.

because he really wanted to avoid you.

he wanted to stop answering the door; to keep you at a safe distance--that being ten feet away from him at all times--with a wall between the two of you.

he wanted whatever he felt when he saw you smile--which was nothing, he swore to himself, over and over--hidden in a closet somewhere.

someplace that he could just forget about it.

but he couldn't seem to forget his neighbor.

his neighbor who, like always, seemed to leave the house at the same time as him.

"oh, hi," he said, carefully avoiding running into you.

you looked up, hands cradling a pizza box, bag dangling from the side. and you smiled at him.

because you were a smiley person.

peter hated it.

"hey, neighbor," you said, easily, stepping past him. "going out?"

peter swallowed. "just to the store. i need some... salt."

what he really needed was to get out of the house.

what he needed was to stop going through the pictures under his bed this late at night, and stop allowing himself to feel any sort of adoration for the girl in them.

what he needed, peter thought, was a reality check.

a time machine.

but he wasn't going to tell you any of that.

"salt?" you repeated, laughing. "i have salt."

"no, i need, like, a salt shaker. a big one."

your brows furrowed.

peter rubbed his hands together, slightly cold. slightly irritated.

and guilty, because he hadn't wanted to be rude to you. he wanted to be polite, a gentleman like may taught him.

but time did strange things to people.

and he'd been living alone for more than half a year.

"the grocery store is probably closed by now," you said, checking an invisible watch.

"i'm just going to the cvs down the block."

you laughed. "i don't think they have salt shakers."

he scratched at the back of his neck. considered clawing his own eyes out.

"you can borrow mine, though," you said to him, softly, as if no one else was supposed to hear. "if you're in a pinch."

"no," peter shook his head. he repeated the word in his mind until it was branded against his skin. "that's... okay."

you raised a brow.

"i don't--i'm not, like, using it, right now. i've just been meaning to pick some up. and i don't have anything to do right now, so."

if peter could go back and tell himself not to say a single thing, he would've.

he would tell himself never to speak to you ever again.

but you laughed because peter was funny. because you felt bad for him, in some strange, uncomfortable way.

"do you have anything to do tomorrow morning?"

peter shook his head. still.

"then why don't i give you enough salt for breakfast tomorrow, and then you can go to the store and get a shaker afterward."

peter swallowed. "i wouldn't want to... impose."

"i'll even give you a slice of pizza."

"that's okay."

"peter," you sighed, almost begrudgingly. "c'mon. i owe you, at least one. and i can't eat a whole pizza myself."

he bit the inside of his cheek.

if there were warning bells, he would hear them clearly in his ear.

"or, i can," you smiled. "but i probably shouldn't. and you probably shouldn't go out this late."

peter frowned at the implication.

"it's okay," he said. "you shouldn't--"

"you don't even have to stay. just come and get some salt."

peter's eyes flickered down to the pizza box in your hands.

he thought about being alone.

about going back into his room and running into memories that would punch him right in the face.

that would beat him until he couldn't feel anything else.

he thought about salt.

about your smile and how much he wanted to stay away.

he thought way too much.

but nodded anyway.

probably because he was an idiot.

"lead the way," you said, finally opening the door.

and peter went.

"come on," you say to him, voice soft and haunted.

quiet and eery.

and peter doesn't want to.

he doesn't want to be close to you right now.

but your hands are soft against his shoulder, warm and welcoming, and he knows that you're waiting. he knows that you don't deserve this.

he knows you.

"peter," you say to him, calling and calling. "it's alright."

your voice is different.

not as smooth. not as beautiful.

"come back to bed."

peter lets your hands lead the way.

he lets you pull him down, push him under water and sit on his chest. laugh as he struggles to get up.

he lets you wrap the covers back around his back, saving him from the cold.

he cuddles close to you, breathing in your skin, cheek on your chest, listening to your heartbeat until it's the only thing he can hear.

"it's okay," you say. "it'll be okay."

and he knows you're lying.

peter is familiar with the concept.

with breaking the rules until no glue can help repair them.

and he hears a very specific gasp in his head. a pleading and crying and dying all over again.

but your heartbeat is right in his ear.

your words are close to him, holding him down.

"i swear to god--" you kicked at a rock somewhere on the ground.

peter blinked, trying to get his eyes to focus.

"--i'm going to murder someone."

he squinted at you, trying to see anyone else. held his jacket even closer to his body.

"hey," he whispered, hand jerking out when you startled at the sound of his voice. "sorry," he said, keeping you steady. he could see his breath in the air.

"peter. was it you?" your voice had a hint of an edge. your eyes were fire.

he frowned. "what?"

"did your smoke detector go off?"

"no," he shook his head, looking back at the building. "i was asleep."

"okay." you nodded, seeming to believe his lie. "i'm going to go ask everyone else."

peter kept his hands on your shoulders, holding you back. "woah," he said, looking into your eyes. "what's the rush?"

"i'm going to punch whoever was burning down their kitchen at four in the morning."

"i think maybe you should take some deep breaths."

you mocked inhaling and exhaling. "there. mr. smith!" you called.

peter clasped a hand over your mouth.

you glared at him. speaking against his hand.

peter quickly moved away, trying to remember himself. trying to remember that he was only three feet away from you.

which breaks the foundation directly in half.

he raised a brow, a bit amused, slightly delirious from exhaustion. "you should stay here. it'll only be ten minutes till we can go back inside."

"who starts a fire at four in the morning?" you whine to him, almost falling against his chest.

his hands go back on your arms, keeping you up. "an asshole," peter agreed. "were you asleep?"

"no. i got home thirty minutes ago."

"ah. were you trying to go to sleep?"

"i was trying to..." you paused, looking away from him. "nevermind. yes. i was sleeping."

peter laughed. "okay. you can get back to..." he shakes his head, an allusion. "whenever the fire department shows up."

"it's cold," you complain to him. "and i didn't have any time to put on my shoes."

"i'm glad you're alive."

that night, peter avoided his sensibility. he didn't want to talk to it, thanks.

he took off his jacket, handing it to you. "here."

"peter. you'll get cold."

"you're in shorts. put it on."

because you were fed up with every other thing, you didn't argue. just hurried to put it on, snuggling into your own skin.

"thanks."

"no problem."

it was silent for a moment; no sirens in hearing distance.

other people had gathered into groups, neighbors gossiping about neighbors.

peter thought that you might've been one of them if you weren't stuck next to him.

"bad night?" he asked you, avoiding the silence.

"what?"

"i've never seen you... angry? irritated?"

"oh." you looked down to the ground, a bit sheepish. maybe embarrassed. peter couldn't see your eyes, so he couldn't tell. "yeah. i worked two shifts in a row. and it's tuesday, so everyone was mad."

"where do you work?"

"a bar a couple of blocks away."

peter nodded.

"sorry about..." you laugh, gesturing to something he couldn't see. "all of that."

"it's okay. you're tired."

"yeah."

so was peter.

and he was insane because he really couldn't stop looking at you. he couldn't even have an internal debate about it.

"peter?" you whispered to him, smiling a little bit.

"what?"

"your jacket smells nice."

peter listens to you speak, appreciating the gentle smile in your voice.

he watches as your eyes change. as your hand gestures towards something.

he watches you.

and there's no one there to tell him to stop.

this particular night, peter knocks on your door.

he'd decided, after lots of thinking, that the best way to avoid you--was to just get over himself.

was to just pretend to be a normal neighbor.

to start acting normal and stop being an idiot.

which, in all fairness, wasn't as easy as peter thought it might be.

especially when you opened the door in a big t-shirt and no pants.

but of course, you just smiled at him. didn't even blink.

"hey," peter says, quickly. "are you busy?"

your eyes met his, a gentle question behind the smirk on your face. "no. what's up?"

"i was gonna, um," peter's face twitched. he cleared his throat, trying to smile even though he'd forgotten how. "i was going to watch a movie. alone. but--" he shrugged. forgot how to speak. "i thought that you might be home. and, just, do you wanna watch with me?"

you were amused at him. but peter appreciated that you didn't laugh right in his face.

"what movie?"

he handed you the case, biting a hole in his lip.

"back to the future?"

"if you wanna watch something else, we can--"

you shake your head, handing him the case back. "no, that's good. let me go grab my phone."

and then peter had you over to his apartment for the first time.

he watched a movie with you and didn’t even feel guilty about it.

peter needs a break.

just a night, an hour, a couple of minutes away from you.

away from the possibility and the words stuck in his head.

the words that he would like to avoid.

the words that he wants to throw in a hole somewhere. bury them where no one will ever find them.

especially not you.

especially not him.

but that's not an option, see. because the words are printed on his arm. they are wrapped around his heart in a brand of shackles they don't manufacture anymore.

and peter lost the key.

so he needs a break instead.

conveniently, you're working. you kissed him goodbye, walked out the door with a smile on your face.

and peter felt so bad that he was relieved to see you go.

relieved because he doesn't want to tell you.

he doesn't want the words to slip.

he doesn't want any of this.

and he needs this break.

he needs a moment to repair his intelligence. to stop acting on a whim. to distance himself from the idea--from the guilt that pounds on his chest like a knock on his door.

he needs a break.

a break from sensibility and rational thinking.

and peter doesn't really need a break from you.

but he's taking one anyway.

he can't wait for you to come back.

"you have class tomorrow?" you asked him, chewing on a piece of popcorn.

"yeah. eleven am."

"who takes a class at eleven in the morning?"

peter frowned. "it was convenient."

you laughed at his face, throwing some popcorn at him. he caught it in his mouth and pretended not to feel some pride at your awed expression.

"this movie sucks," you said to him. but you were still watching it anyway.

you'd been sitting on his couch all day. just entertaining him with commentary about whatever movie was on cable.

peter was glad for the company.

he was trying to get out of the mood he'd been in.

trying to get comfortable in this friendship.

"we can watch something else." he moved to grab the remote, but you stopped him with a nudge of your foot.

"no," you said. "it's okay."

and so it was.

"you're going back home next weekend, right?"

peter nods. he chews on a cookie that you've just pulled out of the oven.

you glare at him, playfully.

he smiles back, mouth full.

"gross, peter." you toss a dish rag at him. he catches it without a blink.

"may asked if you wanted to come."

you blink at him, curious. "she did?"

"yeah. she likes you."

"oh, she likes me from the one time she stopped by your apartment to drop off a box and caught a glimpse of me in the hallway?" you ask him, dryly.

peter appreciates how your voice shifts from high to low. a style of music all on its own.

"she likes you because i tell her about you."

you frown. "you do?"

peter nods, curious about your reaction.

"what do you say? 'the annoying girl from across the hall asked to use my shower again because--'"

he pulls you in a little bit closer, ignoring the protests as you drop a spatula on the counter.

"i tell her that you're nice. and about your cookies."

you smile, reluctantly. "she wants me to come?"

peter nods, letting you go, returning to his cookie.

"would you mind?"

peter freezes.

he prefers not to think about it.

he prefers to pretend that there is no significance in this interaction.

because there isn't.

peter kisses the top of your head, looking down at you. he shakes his head, nonchalant.

"really?"

"i wouldn't mind."

"because i love may."

peter laughs. "i know."

"i will ask her about your baby pictures."

"don't think she has any," peter shrugs.

"oh, you liar."

he laughs again. grabbing another cookie.

"peter," you walked through his door with no greeting, going immediately to the spot on his couch that you'd claimed as your own. "i want a cat."

"you can't get a cat."

you pouted and peter laughed at your face. at the very idea you were in his house.

"why not?" you whined, sliding down his couch. "give me one reason."

"the building doesn't allow pets."

"give me two reasons."

"you'd have to leave the cat alone all day."

you smiled at him. "not if i had a co-owner."

"i'm not getting a cat with you."

you waved a hand, offended. "i didn't mean you. i meant jason."

"jason would kill the cat. then you."

"he's really nice."

peter raised a brow at you, sitting down on the couch finally, just waiting for whatever purpose there was for this visit.

"hey," you said. "don't you have work tonight?"

"i switched shifts with a coworker."

"oh. how come?"

"they had a birthday party to go to tomorrow."

you smiled at him, teeth showing. "that was nice of you."

peter shrugged. "i don't have classes this week, so."

and here, peter knew, was the last warning sign.

it was that night that he stopped caring.

"why aren't you that nice to me?" you put a bare foot on his leg, trying to get him to flinch away.

he just pushed it off of him. "because i like you."

"that's twisted, parker."

"want to watch a movie?"

you moved back, rubbing a hand over your eyes. "can we play a game or something, instead? i might fall asleep if we watch a movie."

peter frowned. "you're tired?"

"no," you shook your head at him. "not really."

"you should go to bed."

"are you kicking me out?"

and peter, despite what he wanted to say, shook his head again.

not sure what he meant by it.

and then you beamed at him.

you blinded him until he didn't care about seeing anything ever again. you broke him down until peter was sure that you were his friend.

that you were his best friend and there wasn't anything he could do about it.

"how do you feel about connect four?" you asked him.

and you stayed.

peter wasn't sure how he felt about that.

gwen.

peter had nightmares every month.

he had conflicts and ideas and non-relenting feelings that wouldn't just leave him alone.

they didn't escape, even when you were around.

despite what deliberate mistakes peter kept making. despite the conscious failures he kept bundled up in his pockets.

and whatever peter wanted to feel for you.

he couldn't.

he wouldn't do that to her.

he wouldn't do that to you.

he wasn't allowed.

the first time peter kissed you, it was a mistake.

it was reckless. it was pushing and pulling at him until he was stretched thin, until he was so close to you that he couldn't think.

and peter had been thinking about it for a while.

he noticed the lingering at your lips.

he noticed how warm you were.

how intriguing how perfect.

he noticed everything about you, no matter how many times he'd told himself to stop. to stop being your friend and stop thinking about anything except being close to you.

when he kissed you, it was stupid.

it was nothing.

it was so so much.

"what?" you'd asked him, in the dark, on his couch.

he was already having a bad day. he was already too close to the edge.

he'd had a dream about you the night before. instead of her.

he'd dreamt of your skin, and your hair, the smell that you left behind when you walked out his door.

he dreamt of touching you, of being closer than he would ever dare himself to be.

and he was having a bad day.

peter shook his head. he swallowed and told himself to stop looking at you. "nothing."

so you turned away from him.

so you were still close.

and it only took a split second for peter to forget.

to forget about guilt and all of its complexities.

to allow himself to like you, for just a moment, for just a second too long.

and then his hands reached out--heart clasped in their grip--to touch your arm.

to feel your skin and savor it.

your brows furrowed. you looked at him, confused.

and peter couldn't get anything more than "i just--" before he closed the distance between the two of you.

before he slammed the door in his own face.

and kissed you.

neither of you put a name to it.

you had agreed, peter knew.

you weren't his girlfriend.

you weren't his friend.

but you stayed the night. you watched movies with him. you made out with him on his couch and it wasn't much.

it wasn't anything.

there was no name for the thing between the two of you.

and peter liked it that way.

at least then he could pretend that it was all okay.

"peter," you were trying to get him to pause.

you were trying to track him down because he hadn't talked to you in a week.

he hadn't dared to see you since that night.

"peter, hey--"

he unlocked his door, feeling the guilt pour down his stomach like gasoline.

it tasted the same.

"i just want to talk," you pleaded with him. "you don't have to say anything."

"i've gotta go," peter answered, short and stern.

"please. just two minutes."

"it's been a long day, y/n."

"it's been a long week," you hissed at him, stopping his door with your foot. "this isn't fair."

and peter knew that.

god, he was aware.

but he shook his head. "not tonight. not right now."

not ever, he thought but didn't say.

"please, peter," your eyes were desperate. your voice had softened, like maybe if you used a euphemism all of this would mean so much less.

it didn't work.

"i'm sorry," you whispered. "i didn't mean to."

peter couldn't have asked what you meant even if he wanted to.

none of this was your fault.

he had burned his own bridges. and now, amidst his own problems, he was hurting you.

so he was just going to stop.

"it doesn't have to mean anything,"

you said the words, so smoothly, so truthfully.

wide eyes, as scared as peter had seen them on the first night. he was the new spider on your wall.

"it doesn't mean anything. we can pretend it never happened."

peter might've been able to do that.

he might've been able to just pretend it was fine.

but he'd kissed you. and now he couldn't stop thinking about it.

even as you stood by his door, pleading with him. he was staring at your lips. he was waiting for that smile so he could kiss it away.

"peter. you're my best friend. i don't want to lose that."

if the words meant anything peter couldn't hear it.

"i'm sorry," he said, and he wasn't sure to who he was apologizing.

"please."

"i can't."

"i'll never bring it up again. i won't kiss you. i won't even complain when you pick out a bad movie. i just want--" you breathed out, a bit panicked.

peter could see it in your eyes.

"i just want you peter. that's all. it doesn't have to be more."

and it didn't.

he could see it in your eyes. your voice. the quick ticking of the clock in the background.

peter saw his own desperation, reflected in your eyes.

so peter opened the door. he let you inside.

and he told himself that if he kissed you again, well. it didn't have to be more than that.

peter presses his lips against yours.

he can feel your smile; leaking into him like poison. like a steady stream of toxin, infecting his blood.

but he doesn't stop.

he pushes against you, pulls you even closer.

he teases at the hair against your neck, he cradles your jaw in his fingertips, and marvels at how soft and smooth you are.

he bites down on your lip, appreciating the gasp that falls from your lips.

his hand slung around your waist, traveling up and down your back in a steady motion.

peter feels as you press against him. as you crave that distance that he's been trying his best to avoid.

he presses his lips against yours.

he does it over and over again.

and despite the gasps of air the two of you need, peter doesn't ever want to stop.

he could live there; in a blinking moment.

he applies glue to the edges, tells himself that none of it is going to fall apart.

his lips travel down to the skin of your neck. tasting you until the rest of it is a blur.

peter kisses you.

he tells himself that you don't mean anything more.

the feeling in his chest is just guilt.

"hey," you poked his shoulder. "what's wrong?"

peter blinked. tried to focus again. shook his head. "nothing."

"you look..." you tilted your head, looking right into his eyes. "concerned?" you guessed. "worried?"

"i'm fine." he grabbed your hand and kissed the knuckles.

it made up for the lie, peter was sure.

"what're you thinking about?"

"nothing."

you laughed. "peter parker, you mean to tell me that nothing is going on in that giant brain of yours?"

"nope."

and you just smiled at him. he appreciated that; you didn't press on the wound.

only stood there idly while he bleed to death.

he preferred it that way.

"are you hungry?" he asked, pulling you up from the couch with him.

"not much."

"do you want to go to the park?"

you'd been teasing him about going earlier. about sitting on a bench and staring at all the birds that walked passed.

you frowned at him. "you hate the park."

"i like the park."

"you like the pretzel cart right next to the park. you don't actually like the park."

"i can like the park if we get a pretzel."

you snorted. smiled at him, because you were happy.

because peter knew you.

because he was sure of it.

"i suppose we can arrange that," you said to him, rubbing at the skin of his palm.

and so the two of you left.

peter forgot all about it.

how he was looking at you instead of a box of pictures under his bed.

how that killed him, just a little bit.

peter paces around his apartment.

you're not there.

you're not here.

peter takes a moment to think about where you might be.

you had plans tonight.

you had things that you were supposed to be doing with him.

"dinner and a movie," you said, smiling at him as if he'd just told you a secret.

and peter smiled back because you were just that cute.

but you aren't here.

you aren't answering his calls.

and you didn't come to your door.

so peter paces around his apartment.

he waits for you to arrive, but the time spent thinking about it only allows him to overthink it.

to picture you, somewhere alone.

someplace that he won't be able to get you back.

"what's this?" you plucked the picture right off of his shelf.

you intruded on every carefully sanctioned rule peter had.

you were in his room.

and peter didn't have time to stop you before you drifted over to his bookshelf; before you unlocked a secret that he'd been struggling to keep.

you looked over to him, just curious, eyes just soft. "who's she?"

as soon as you said the words, peter knew that it couldn't have gone anyway else.

he knew that he couldn't have resolved, reflected, or kept himself from saying anything he wasn't supposed to.

like a selfish child, he grabbed the picture from your hands. he put it back on the bookshelf, reminding himself how to breathe.

he couldn't look at you to know that you were concerned.

he couldn't see beyond the boundaries that had been broken.

gwen, and gwen, and gwen.

and you.

because you were a pest on his wall.

peter breathed out. he considered stopping right then and there.

"peter?" you asked, "are you okay?"

eyes unmoving, dangling off of the edge of the world. his world.

gwen.

he looked at the picture--the one from graduation. the only one he had the heart to keep.

the only one he'd forgotten to lock away.

"peter?" you repeated, carefully, a gentle hand on his back.

as if to keep him grounded.

and that was enough.

he kicked you out of his apartment.

it was a bad night.

it was one of the nights when peter woke up in a sweat. where he panicked and fought and tried to kick his way out of any reality he lived in.

it was a night where only one image was burned into his brain.

where there was only one person to blame.

and it wasn't you.

it wasn't you when your hands grasped at his face; when you tried to bring him back down to someplace safe.

someplace where he could breathe.

bring him back to you.

it was a bad night. one of the nights when peter just forgot to breathe.

where he just forgot how to think, how to be a person instead of a shell of anger, of denial and grief and all of the things that he'd never managed to break free from.

it was a night.

another one and she still wasn't there.

he still hadn't woken up from the nightmare.

"gwen," he gasped out because he'd forgotten.

because you were there. you were right there next to him.

and you weren't supposed to be.

you were breaking the rules.

you were betrayal, knocking at his door every night, ridiculing him with every cruel word.

"peter," you say, softly, bringing him back down. reminding him of where he is.

and he breaks free.

he breaks all over again.

right into your hands.

he doesn't have a word for it, the way you look at him.

he doesn't have a firm grasp on how much he cares about you.

but he worries all day.

he worries about you, about where you are, about what you're doing.

he worries that he cares too much. that this is too far. that this means too much.

that everything has intruded on his careful nothing.

and he misses you when you're gone.

and he calls you when he gets the chance.

and he smiles at you.

doesn't know how to define the way he feels.

but it doesn't have to mean anything.

"i'm sorry," he tells you. "that wasn't fair."

you haven't said a thing.

you haven't pushed him, having kept your eyes from handing him a letter of resignation.

i can't do this anymore, you say, with just your eyes.

"i'm sorry," peter repeats.

"what do you want, peter?"

he shakes his head. he contemplates the idea until he forgets where he is.

"i don't know," he says. "i don't--i'm not sure."

"well, i am."

the words are short.

they are the end of an end.

peter watches you, waiting for you to leave him--knowing that you'll only hurt him this once.

that this feeling won't drift into another decade.

two years of knowing you, he thinks. two years of this.

"i can't do this anymore, peter."

he hears you but doesn't understand.

he thinks but draws no obvious conclusions.

"i'm sorry," he whispers.

he doesn't know what he's sorry for.

"god," you scoff at him.

a reprimand is thrown against the wall. it ricochets back into his chest, tearing his heart out. reminding him of the things he’s done, again and again.

he kicked you out.

he threw you away.

he pushed you so hard and so far that he barely recognizes your face, even now.

even as you stare at him--begging him to change. begging him to do the one thing he feels most incapable of.

he'd refused to love you for so long that he'd left bruises fighting you.

peter breathes in.

"i love you."

the words throw him a branch. he drops it. he pushes it even further into the ground. dirt and disease and all of the things that he deserves.

he waits for you to leave and leave and leave.

"peter, i love you.”

it’s a different sentence. it hurts even more.

“are you sorry about that?" you ask him, your anger burning holes in his heart. "are you sorry for letting me love you?"

he says nothing.

this means nothing.

"i can't--i won't sit here and pretend like i don't anymore. i won’t be your statue.”

a beautiful statue, peter realizes.

something to return to. the thing to remain when everything else has been turned to ash. something hidden and secret and just for him.

he thinks of you, stone and iron and every impenetrable thing.

he blanches at the prospect.

“i'm sorry, peter,” you say, and it’s cruel. “because it's not fair to you. i know it's not. but it's not fair to me either."

tears gather in your eyes. they drown peter in their silence.

he tries to speak but his words are too quiet. he tries to tell you but his voice has been stolen.

"i'm sorry," you tell him.

and then you're gone.

"you don't have to tell me," you'd said to him. a long time ago. "whatever it is, i don't care."

peter thought that you might. that if you knew the truth, you might care.

that you might not want to be around a murderer like him.

but he didn't say that.

"peter," you'd wrapped an arm around him, supported him with all of your weight. "i care about you, you know?"

it was a question that didn't require answering.

peter couldn't say it back. guilt had its chains wrapped around him, and was controlling his every move.

"okay. as long as you know."

"i don't care," you'd said to him.

but you would.

peter sits in his apartment alone.

it's the first time in weeks.

usually, you're there. usually, you're filling his rooms with laughter. brightening every doorway you walk through.

you’re there with a warmth peter doesn’t care to describe. a smile he doesn’t want to see; eyes that go beyond a simple conclusion.

you’re there, changing everything. one second at a time.

you distract him until he doesn't need distraction.

but tonight he's alone.

tonight he's staring at the pictures he still has of gwen.

and despite the pain.

despite the guilt.

despite all of his attention focused on the photographs in front of him.

despite it all.

he's thinking about you.

when peter knocks on your door, he tries not to wince.

he tries to collect himself into a neat picture. into a semblance of a person. a complete idea.

he struggles and scrambles around for something spare, something he left behind.

but he can't manage to find it all before you open your door.

before you're standing in front of him, eyes puffy.

it's been a night.

one night without you and peter's already back.

some cruel part of him laughs.

"hey," he says.

he repeats apologies in his head. tries to print them out into the world. he wants you to know. he wants to tell you.

he wants to just fix this.

you stare at him, mouth open the tiniest bit. unexpected and shocked and everything peter was worried about.

peter scratches at his neck, ashamed. "i know you're still mad. and that i shouldn't be here. i wanted--" he swallows his courage. "i wanted to give you some space, but i..."

he stops. looks at you. your eyes. a phantom of a smile. and idea he’s lost one too many times.

"i don't want to lose you."

he repeats the words like a record in his mind.

your words, he realizes.

"i can't lose you," he repeats. he feels the grasp on his heart loosen. he breathes out, shakily. "can we talk? i want--i just want--"

and he falters on the edges of the words.

he can feel the pain, steady as air, crawling up his skin, laughing at him over and over. it presses up against him, whispering that he can’t do it. it ceases to exist at all.

it holds him hostage. he’s not allowed to do this. he’s not supposed to be here, looking at you.

but he wants to feel it. he wants you to hear him clearly. he wants to push this wall away. and he—

if he could just say it.

you open the door.

because you've always been more forgiving than him.

its a couple of weeks later.

a couple of weeks of finally understanding what denial can do to a person.

of finally defining the meaning of you.

of you and your smile and your forgiveness.

the strength you've leant peter, even when he hasn't deserved it.

it's a couple of weeks later, and you're sitting on peter's couch.

you're there, now, and peter doesn't feel guilty about it.

he can't.

he doesn't let himself think about what it means.

instead, he runs a fingertip up and down the skin of your arm, he tries to pay attention to the movie you're both watching and fails.

he looks over at you, admiring the light on your face.

the depths and lights and pictures that a camera could never capture.

he smiles at you, unknowingly.

you look over to him. "what?" you ask, teasing voice, a brow raised.

but you're smiling too.

peter shakes his head. he tilts your chin up with his finger, getting a better view.

there's a look on your face that peter never wants to go away.

there's a feeling in his chest--more than pounding, more than strength--that he recognizes most.

you mean something to him. that much is clear.

"peter," you sing, trying to get his attention.

"what?"

"you're not even watching the movie."

peter smiles. "that's okay."

"want to change it?"

peter shakes his head, he doesn't need to say a single thing.

you sigh and look away from him, but there's a grin on your face that peter wants to put in his pocket.

for a rainy day.

he keeps staring at you.

doesn't need to watch a movie when you're right next to him.

and peter defines it.

because he knows.

and he's pretty sure--amidst all of the mistakes and lies--that he always has.

“hey,” peter says.

he doesn’t need to worry about restrictions. about ideas and actions that he’s made.

you smile at him, despite it all.

“change your mind?” you ask him, so very close.

he can feel your breath on his skin. can taste the eagerness in the air.

yes, he thinks,

you wait for him. you stare at him until he speaks. “peter,” you whisper, like a beacon of hope.

like a light to go home to.

peter smiles again, ready.

“i love you.”

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tags: @moonlarking-blog @v1ci0us @preciousbabypeter @alexxavicry @directioner5life @inthegetawaycarwithtaylah @localrockstargf

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