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joelswritingmistress · 6 months

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Last Halloween: Chapter 4

Summary: After a tragedy involving Joel happened on Halloween one year prior, the town now shuns him while ignoring the details of the now closed case. You are seemingly the only one to offer empathy to a man the town is making out to be a monster.

Warning: Angst, talks of violence

Pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader

"I'm pissed off," you shouted, finally getting out of the sad funk you had been in the night before. When you slammed a cabinet a little too hard, Jessie's eyes lifted toward you from behind her coffee cup.

"Okay," she said in a way that reminded you of a therapist. "You can be pissed off. You have every right to be but, uh, what did that cabinet do to you?" The end part wasn't an actual lecture. She chuckled as she spoke the last few words.

"I just don't get it," you went on, shoving your own coffee mug beneath the Keurig and reaching for a pod beside it. A part of you feared Joel might actually remove himself fully from your life. You didn't want that.

"I'm not excusing the way he handled things with you, because he didn't have any right to be a jerk," Jessie began. "But I can't imagine being in his shoes. He was so on guard when we were there, like he was afraid to move. And then that asshole had to come in and ruin it when he finally started to relax. I mean, Joel was not charged with murder, or even manslaughter. I don't know why this town demonizes him so much."

"That's why I want to keep this a secret from Winnie and Chrissy. I love them but they won't even think about giving him a chance."

Jess zipped her lips. "I got you covered, girl."

You smiled. "Thank you."

"I didn't really know what he looked like, but he's hot at least." Your friend said, beginning to toy with an LL Bean catalogue that sat on the kitchen table.

"He is, isn't he?" You almost sighed when you said that, but remembered you were mad and your posture changed accordingly as you continued to prepare your coffee. "Nope, I'm still pissed."

Jessie licked her fingers and flipped to the next page. "Well, you go right ahead and be pissed." She looked back at you, pretending to scold you. "Just don't go slamming things."

You giggled and went to join her at the small kitchen table.

"Did you kiss him last night?"

You half-smiled and shook your head. "No."

"Not even in the photobooth?" Jessie wondered aloud. She glanced around. "Where's the picture strip?"

You glanced around. "I.. don't even know. Probably my purse or my car." You shook your head. "Things were going so well. We were having so much fun."

You both sipped on your coffee and from somewhere outside you heard the revving of a motorcycle. The noise grew louder and louder as it approached and the two of you exchanged a glance.

"Is this your boy, now?" Jessie jumped up out of her chair and practically raced you toward the front windows that overlooked the front yard.

"Jessie!"

"It's him." She turned to you and laughed.

"Shit." You put a hand on your forehead and turned to her. "What do I do? What do I say?"

"Want me to buffer so you can get your thoughts together?"

It was the best idea you could think of, and so you nodded and tried to come up with a plan of action in your mind. When the motorcycle's engine turned off, Jessie yanked open the front door and met Joel halfway on the front porch that lead into the house.

"Hi there." Jessie looked at him with accusatory eyes and Joel immediately put his tail between his legs.

"Hey. I'm sorry to just drop by like this. But is-"

"She's here," your friend cut him off, placing her hands on her hips.

"Would, uh, would it be alright if I talked to her? I'd like to apologize for the way I acted last night."

Jessie looked over her shoulder at you through the open front door and gave a subtle wink, though when she turned back to Joel turned her face back to stone and shrugged. "I'll see if she'll come talk to you."

You allowed Jessie back inside, exchanging a little smile before you took her place outside on the porch.

Joel immediately closed the gap between the two of you and you didn't attempt to move away. Being close to him again felt good, despite still being a bit mad.

"I just want to say I'm sorry," He went on, "For the way I acted last night. I took everything out on you and you're the only person, besides Ron at the garage, who's been nice to me in a really long time."

You shifted your eyes to meet his more directly and he went on.

"I really don't want to push you away. And as hard as things have been for me this year, it's no excuse to treat you that way." He concluded with. "I'm really sorry."

It was genuine. You knew that for certain. Joel experienced a trauma that he was forced to relive and be punished for day after day after day. You were his safety net, and so you felt as though he was allowed a little slip - especially after the incident with the man the night before.

"I'm sorry too," you began but Joel shook his head.

"You have nothing to be sorry for."

"I pushed you to go out with me," you went on. "I didn't stop to think of how hard it might've been for you."

"I enjoyed yesterday," Joel told you, "Like you said to me on the street last night, that was the best time I've had in a very long time. I fucked it up."

"You didn't."

"I did." Joel nodded. "And I was hoping maybe you'd let me take you on another ride? I kind of want you to know.. everything."

You swallowed hard and then gave a little nod. "Let me just go get a light jacket."

When you turned to head back inside, you felt Joel pull you back with a light tug of your hand. You immediately saw the heightened vulnerability in his eyes.

"Thank you," he said. "For giving me a chance. Not just now, today, but in the coffee shop. You have no idea how much that means to me."

Okay, you officially weren't mad anymore. You wanted to cry for him. Not just Joel's words but the tone of his voice made your entire chest cavity feel heavy.

You leaned toward him and wrapped your arms around him, suspecting he hadn't had a real hug in awhile. For a long moment you just stood there, holding him against you with a hand on the back of his head.

Joel sighed and he allowed you to embrace him until you finally pulled back.

"I'll be right back."

"Okay." He answered.

You hurried inside and right away Jessie mouthed the words: did you kiss him? It eased some of the tension and made you laugh quietly as you shook your head and hurried toward the coat closet.

"I'll be back later on," you told her.

"Enjoy." She wiggled her eyebrows and bid you farewell before you joined Joel outside again.

You didn't ask him where you were going because, frankly, you didn't care. When you straddled the bike behind him, you felt content; at ease.

Joel started up the bike and you wrapped your arms around him and rested the side of your face against his back as you left the driveway. This time, you didn't look around like you had the night before. You closed your eyes, embraced the cool breeze and enjoyed the comfort of being so close to Joel. His scent was intoxicating.

You were sure you should have been a little bit afraid, but there wasn't even the smallest part of you that was. You felt completely free on the back of Joel's motorcycle.

He took a turn down a road that was leading up toward the the junkyard, but it wasn't quite that far. Joel slowed the bike down across the street from the lone structure on that end of the street - an old ice cream shop. Aside from the little brown and white building, there was nothing but trees that surrounded you.

A little neon sign on the window of the shop read, OPEN. A pumpkin sign hung in the window above it and the door was covered in fake spiderwebs.

"Why didn't you pull in?" You asked, suspecting Joel was planning on getting you ice cream.

He motioned up to the right corner of the shop beneath the roof. "You see that tiny camera right there?"

You squinted and gave a nod. "Yeah."

"That's the reason I'm not serving a life sentence."

Your eyebrows pressed together. "What?"

Joel turned his head partway around and you both got off the bike. When you were face to face you were able to give him your full attention.

"This is where it happened," he went on. "The incident. I had a flat tire on my truck after I left work one night. I broke down over here and I was changing it."

You had goosebumps already. You had wanted to hear what happened right from Joel's mouth but you would never have pressed the situation. Still, being here, right where it all happened, had you a bit shook.

"A car came rushing up behind me and I kind of thought they were going to offer to help at first," Joel explained. "But Johnny Watkins and Chase Hall hopped out, both drunk as hell, and started making demands. Everything from give me your wallet to, we're going to take your car."

"Holy shit, Joel."

"When I told them to get lost and they ended up ripping my spare tire off the car and Johnny hit me in the face." He ran a hand through his hair, "They beat the hell out of me and then demanded my keys but I threw the keys into the woods so they wouldn't get the satisfaction of it."

You wanted to hug him. How had this town branded *him* the monster?

"That pissed them off even more and at some point Johnny got his hands on a chain from the back of my pickup and started to strangle me with it while Chase recorded it on his phone. He tried to delete the footage later but the police were able to recover it. Between that and," he motioned to the building's camera again, "their security footage, they ruled I wasn't guilty of anything."

Joel went on. "When he had the chain around my neck I managed to back pedal and we fell down this little embankment over here." He motioned beyond the edge of the road to where the thick of the woods began to take shape. "Johnny broke his neck. Other than being a little banged up from them jumping me, I was fine."

"Joel, that's awful. All of it. I'm so, so sorry." You didn't have the correct words to say to him. You didn't know if there was such a thing.

"Even though they did all that to me, I've still had a hard time dealing with the fact that I was a factor in his death."

"You didn't do anything wrong."

"It doesn't matter." Joel shook his head. "That night is on constant replay in my mind. And everyone in town hates me over it because he was a local celebrity around here. Everyone knew Johnny. And to them I'm just some schmuck who killed him."

Joel looked down the embankment and you carefully pulled him into a hug. When his arms wrapped around you, you held him tighter and spoke into his ear quietly.

"You're a great man, Joel," you told him. "And you deserve better than all of this."

"Yeah, well, you saw what happened at the bar last night."

"Well, the whole town could burn for all I care," you told him, glancing up at him now. "And I would light the match." You placed a hand on his cheek. "I'm sorry the world has let you down so badly."

Joel swallowed hard. "I just wanted you to hear it directly from me."

"I never believed the bullshit stories."

His eyes danced across yours, roaming from the left to right and back again a few times. "Why did you offer me the free food that day in your shop? Why do you bother with me?"

"I just thought you looked like a man who needed a friend, or just somebody to talk to." Your eyes never left his. "There was a sadness in you that I couldn't ignore anymore - and I don't know how anyone could."

"I've had a hard time navigating life since that day." He sighed out loud again. "That's why I come in for coffee at night. I don't like to see a lot of people, and I don't think they like to see a lot of me."

"Well, sometimes all you need are a few good people," you told him. "And I don't plan on going anywhere so you better get used to me."

Joel gave half, closed-mouth grin and the mood grew just a tad lighter. "So, I didn't totally blow it last night?"

You shook your head. "You didn't blow it." You took the initiative and perched up onto your toes and kissed him on the cheek, letting your lips linger there just above his facial hair.

Joel's face often gave away the shock he was feeling. That was one thing you had begun to recognize about him. He swallowed hard again when you pulled away.

"I'm sorry," you said again.

"It's fine." He nodded toward the ice cream shop. "You want one since we're here?"

You didn't want to linger there any longer. Getting ice cream at that shop was too eerie of a thought. You were glad Joel had confided in you and told you all about what had happened, but the idea of having ice cream right there in that spot didn't feel right.

"How about if I treat you down at the Dairy Mart instead?" You offered.

Joel nodded again. "Thank you. I know this is a lot."

Staring up at him, you couldn't help it. You leaned in and felt relief when he reciprocated. Your lips met and it was like a release for both of you as your bodies relaxed against one another's.

Your stomach had that rush of excitement, the way it did you went on a rollercoaster. Joel's hand rested on your face and he kissed you a little harder before you parted, both breathing heavy.

He leaned his forehead against yours and closed his eyes. You let yours flicker open and closed them again when you pecked his lips once more.

Joel sighed contently and you pulled him back in for another hug. He held you tightly against him and let out a breath against your neck, sending goosebumps down your back.

"Are you okay?" You asked him.

"Yeah." He finally pulled back to face you and toyed with a strand of hair by your face. "You don't mind being seen in public with me? At the Dairy Mart or where ever."

"I want people to see me with you," you told him honestly. "I'm on your side."

Joel had that vulnerable look in his eyes again and he leaned back in to kiss you once more chastely on the lips.

You placed a hand on his cheek. "Come on. My treat."

"Only if you let me make you dinner."

A smile finally formed on your face again and you gave a little nod. "Deal."

CLICK HERE FOR CHAPTER 5

@untamedheart81 @amyispxnk @grogusmum

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hottpinkpenguin · 1 month

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The Way of Winter - Chapter 6

Joel Miller series Female reader insert

A/n: takes place at the end of episode 6 (spoilers if you haven't seen!). I took a few liberties with the location. Took a (suuuuper) long hiatus - but I'm back!

Taglist (Since it's been so long, if anyone doesn't want to be tagged anymore pls let me know!): @missdragon-1 @this--is--music @caravelofthesun @ishouldclean @mezmerwrites @babypeapoddd @ay0nha @tpwkstiles @one-sweet-gubler @coolninjavoid @ameliabs-world @superflymaterial @p-muffin @s1xthirty @flightlexsbird @nataliemdixon @krisviciousx @notsosecretspy @freerangesweets @partyofone3413 @angelfxll @bojana-aa04

Word count: 1,662 | Tags: slow burn | Warnings: graphic descriptions of gore, reader getting shot, cursing

Joel watched y/n as she methodically cut away the scales and took out the innards of the six fresh trout she’d caught for dinner. Her hands were red and raw from the ice cold water, but she moved with a confidence and dexterity that impressed Joel, against himself.

It had been three days since Joel had begrudgingly agreed to trust Ellie and let this stranger lead them deeper into the woods. She hadn’t spoken to either of them since. Joel vacillated between irritation, mistrust, and antipathy towards her. Ellie seemed more inclined towards pity. She’d attempted to speak to y/n on several occasions, but was never met with anything more than a contemptuous stare. The silent treatment was grating on his already haggard nerves. Between her self-indulgent petulance and the near-constant throbbing of his stitches, Joel was ready to snap. And tonight was as good as any for a fight, he thought darkly.

“How long do you mean not to talk to us?” he demanded. Although she didn’t look up from her task, Joel didn’t miss the way her movements got sharper when he spoke. He was under her skin. Good, he thought. If I can bother her, I can break her.

“You’re not the only person who’s lost someone, you know.” Joel pressed forward. Ellie had stopped tending to the fire in favor of shooting him warning glances. Joel knew that Ellie saw y/n as their only shot at surviving in this wintry wasteland. She wasn’t wrong, of course. But Joel Miller was too proud to let anyone - especially y/n - lord that over him.

“It’s pretty fucking pathetic, actually,” he went on, adding a little extra acid to his words. “Sounds like you didn’t even try and save your family that you apparently gave such a big shit about.”

Joel didn’t even see the knife leave her hand, didn’t see it streak through the air or bury itself in his foot. In fact, Joel found himself regarding the knife curiously for a heartbeat before his brain even registered pain. In that heartbeat, y/n had risen from her crouched position on the side of the icy mountain stream and was striding over towards him, murder in her eyes.

“Jesus Christ, y/n, no!” Ellie was small compared to y/n - scrappy and tenacious, but too small. She flung herself impotently into y/n’s path, but y/n shoved her aside easily.

“What the fuck did you say to me, you motherfucker!” Y/n’s scream was hoarse, like she’d been yelling for hours on end. In spite of himself, Joel laughed. At least she’s talking, he thought with glum satisfaction as he felt hot blood pooling in his boot from where her knife had sunk into his arch. The fire in her eyes blazed all the harder, and she threw herself down on top of Joel. Her hands closed around his throat like a vice, ice cold and deathly strong. Joel struck out with his fists, aiming for the sides of her head. He landed three heavy blows, and with each one her grip strength waned a bit. With the fourth slam, Joel felt her hands completely slack off his throat as she pitched sideways. Ellie had regained her footing and had climbed on y/n’s back, shrieking like a banshee as she tore at y/n’s hair, neck and shoulders. As if in slow motion, Joel watched as y/n turned 180 degrees and threw herself backwards against the ground, slamming Ellie’s back on the frozen earth. Ellie let out an ugly, strangled grunt, her eyes widening in pain and shock. Her arms went slack around y/n’s shoulders as she gasped silently, trying to force air back into her lungs.

Everything froze in suspended motion. Joel saw y/n’s expression soften as she surfaced from her rage-fueled outburst. She stared down at Ellie with a look of disbelief and horror as the girl writhed in the snow, her hands clawing futilely at her throat. Her face was turning a deep shade of crimson as she continued to fight for breath.

“Fuck, no no no no no.” Y/n was kneeling next to Ellie, hands visibly shaking as they covered her mouth in horror. Joel’s mind felt like it ground to a halt, the satisfaction he’d felt moments before at successfully breaking y/n out of her reverie vanishing into smoke. Without thinking, Joel reached for the gun in his waistband, leveling it at y/n’s chest and squeezed the trigger. The gunshot ripped open the woods. It was still echoing off the trees when y/n collapsed on the ground and Ellie sucked in a greedy, gasping breath…

******

“Jesus fucking Christ, Joel, you killed her.” Your mind was fraying at the seams. The moments around you weren’t making sense. You couldn’t find the thread that tied them all together.

You felt a blazing, fiery pain in your chest. It spread up one side of your neck, down one of your arms, and radiated throughout your torso. Each inhale and exhale made it worse, agony searing through your veins like wildfire.

Hands on you. Small hands on your cheeks. Warm hands. Your cheeks felt cold, your face felt cold. Clammy.

Then, there were bigger hands. Meaty hands, pressing down on that fire-blasted hole in your chest. You shrieked at the pain, but you were surprised to find your voice choked and drowning. You gurgled in pain, begging. “Please please please please.”

“It’s alright, y/n, we’re here.” A young voice. Girl. Your eyes slipped in and out of focus.

Treetops, high above you. Dark, bare branches against a slate-gray sky. Snowflakes.

“She’s losing too much blood, Ellie. It’s no good.”

“We’ll fucking die out here, Joel!”

More pain, more pressure on your chest. The pain was white hot, but somehow fading at the edges. Like you were pulling away from it.

“I can’t unfuck this, Ellie!”

“You fucking KILLED her!”

Your veins weren’t burning anymore. They were freezing. Ice in your body. Running through your arms, your neck, your eyes, your legs. Tiny, shallow breaths. In and out of your nose. The sky above you beginning to darken.

“She almost killed you-”

“Joel, if she fucking dies out here so do we!”

Quiet. Three sets of breathing. Two ragged and deep with rage. One - yours - panting.

“Christ…”

A face above you. Dark eyes, salt and pepper hair. You recognized it.

“Y/n?! Can you hear me?”

Your vision began to drift. You couldn’t keep your eyes focused on the face.

Footsteps. Moving away from you.

“What are you doing?”

Silence.

“Ellie, goddamnit, wha-”

“She’s bleeding out. We need to cauterize the wound.”

“The bullet’s still in there.”

More quiet. Darkness pulling in over you like a curtain. Your lips felt cold.

“If you cauterize the wound with the bu-”

“You got any fucking better ideas?!”

Inhale. Quiet.

******

Joel’s heart made a sickening twist in his chest as he watched y/n’s eyes loll back in her head. The dark stains of blood on face and neck contrasted garishly with the whitish-blue tint of her skin. Joel had seen plenty of people die, and more than a few of those had died by his hands. But y/n was going down hard. Stubborn bitch, he thought to himself with nauseous guilt. Can’t even die easy.

Behind him, Ellie rose from the campfire, striding over with a frying pan. For a moment, Joel didn’t comprehend what she was doing. He just stared at her, dumbfounded.

“Pull her jacket back for fuck’s sake!”

“A frying pan, Ellie, are you serious?”

“It’s the only thing that’s hot enough, just fucking do it!” Joel’s hands shook as he lifted his hands off y/n’s bullet wound, a fresh torrent of blood seeping out without the pressure of his body weight to staunch the opening. That’s a good sign, he thought idly as his hands ripped back the layers of dirty clothing to reveal y/n’s bare, bloody chest. Heart hasn’t stopped pumping yet.

Ellie hesitated only momentarily, her face turning green before she laid the sidewall of the frying pan against y/n’s wound with a gut-wrenching sizzle. Joel swallowed down a wave of vomit as the horrid smell of burning flesh ripped through his nostrils. Y/n stirred only slightly at first, but after a moment her eyes popped open and she convulsed, letting out a weak wail of confused pain. Joel was quick enough to grab her hands before they reflexively batted away the hot frying pan. She mewled in protest, eyes rolling aimlessly, not seeing anything.

“That’s enough, Ellie.” Ellie pulled the frying pan off, tossing it aside and bending over to empty the contents of her stomach on the snow. Y/n went slack under him, and Joel felt himself come down from the adrenaline high with a vicious crash. His breathing was heavy, chest heaving with each inhale. He hung his head, weak with dying fury and bone-crushing guilt. Ellie crumpled into a seat on the snow beside him.

Joel didn’t know how long the three of them stayed there in that clearing. Y/n was unconscious, but alive. The barely-there rise and fall of her blood-coated chest confirmed that much. How she’d survived, Joel had no idea. He could only guess that the bullet had missed the lungs and the heart by mere millimeters. Maybe, with all the tussling she’d been doing with Ellie, she’d moved just enough to throw off his aim. Try as he might to deny it, Joel had been aiming to kill. Acting on reflex. Protecting Ellie.

Or maybe he’d flinched at the last moment. Maybe, even though his reflexes said kill, some part of him said save. Because one thing became clear as day to Joel Miller as he sat in that bloody snowbank, twilight sinking over the frozen forest:

If y/n died, Joel Miller would never get over it.

**more chapters coming soon! let me know if you'd like to be tagged (or untagged) if you like this series, check out my Last of Us masterlist for other works

#joel miller #joel miller the last of us #joel miller last of us #joel miller x reader #joel miller x y/n #joel miller x you #joel miller pedro pascal #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal x y/n #pedro pascal x you #way of winter series #last of us fic #the last of us imagine #the last of us fanfiction #the last of us

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mercury-crux · 1 year

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Limited Life Incorrect Quotes

Pearl: I know this isn’t going to end well and I don’t care. So don’t you try and stop me, Martyn! Martyn: I wasn’t stopping you. I was asking if you had a spare camera so I can record this.

Cleo: Why aren’t you sleeping? Scar: I’m too busy plotting your murder to sleep, Cleo. Cleo: Scar: …The nightmares. Cleo: wrapping their arms around Scar Awwww, sweetie-

Grian: Thought I was meowing back at my cat for the past hour, but it was just me and Martyn meowing at each other from different rooms in the house.

Martyn: Life could be worse, BigB. BigB: Life could be a lot better too!

Bdubs: Hey, Cleo! Did you know your my BFFLWYLION? Cleo: What the hell is that supposed to mean? Bdubs: Best Friend For Life Whether You Like It Or Not. Cleo: Cleo: That’s one way to say it, I guess…

Impulse: Hey, Scott? Can I get some dating advice? Scott: Just because I'm with Martyn doesn't mean I know how I did it.

Scott: Hey, can you do me a favor? Martyn: Sorry, I have to go do literally anything other than this. Scott: You don’t even have a legitimate reason? Martyn: Oh, no, I do. Scott: Well, what is it? Martyn: You see, I simply don’t give a fuck.

Martyn: Question, how difficult would it be to bowl in a bee suit? BigB: Not that hard, I don't think, as long as you can move. Scar: I'd assume as hard as it is to bowl in a maid outfit. Scar: Wouldn't be any harder, but you'd get some WEIRD looks. Grian: Are. Are you speaking from experience. Scar: No! Scar: Scar: ….Maybe.

BigB: Did you ever have like a pet run away and find it or anything? Jimmy: I had a lizard that I burnt.

BigB, digging their grave: Long story short, this is my grave…….Want me to make you one too?

Skizz: I’d like to live through a week that’s not a whole new verse of “We Didn’t Start the Fire.”

Grian: Did you take out Martyn as I requested? Joel: Martyn has been taken out, yes. Grian: You have my grat- Joel: It was a great restaurant. Joel: We had a romantic candlelit dinner. Joel: Martyn proposed afterwards- we’re filing the wedding papers.

Joel: I’m quick at math. Jimmy: Ok, what’s 38 times 76? Joel: 24. Jimmy: That wasn’t even close. Joel: But it was quick.

Bdubs: Standing next to sunflowers always makes me feel weak like ‘look at this fucking flower. This flower is taller than I am. This flower is winning and I’m losing.’ Grian: Wow, you are not ready to hear about trees.

Cleo: Are you laughing at that video of Pearl and Jimmy fighting? Etho: No. Etho: I'm laughing at the comments.

Scar: I have a bad feeling about this… Grian: What do you mean? Scar: Don't you ever get that little voice in your head that tells you if you're going to get into trouble? Grian: No? Jimmy: That actually explains so much.

Joel: Hey, are you okay? Pearl: Yeah. Joel: You don't look okay… Pearl: Then stop looking.

Martyn: Ah shit, I forgot. Joel: Forgot what? Martyn: How do you expect me to answer that?

Pearl: I can be your partner for the next race. Cleo: Sorry, Pearl. It's a sibling race. Bdubs: Maybe there's a contest for lonely children after this. Cleo: It's only children, Bdubs. A lonely child is what you're gonna be when I sell you!

Cleo: I hate to tell you this, but one of you was adopted. Bdubs & Scar: Bdubs: Only one…?

BigB, at Cleo’s funeral: I need a moment with them. Everyone else at the funeral: Of course. leaves BigB, leaning over Cleo’s coffin: Okay, listen here you little shit. I know you’re not dead. Cleo, sitting up in the coffin: Yeah, no shit.

Bdubs: Why don't humans have a specific noise that means "there are bees here, let's leave immediately." Why are elephants more advanced than us. Etho: We do have a specific noise for it. It sounds like this: Etho: "There are bees here, let's leave immediately."

Joel and Grian's house is on fire, but they don't know it Joel: Damn, it's hot in here. Grian: I know, it's so hot there's smoke coming out of the vent! Joel: Joel: First of all, I'm assuming you have no idea what the problem with that statement is. Grian: What? Joel: Second of all, we need to get the fuck out of here, NOW.

Cleo: You can’t have a gun on stage! Tango: WRONG AGAIN! I can have a gun, and I must have a gun, that’s the rule of Chekhov’s Gun: have a gun. And now that it’s been seen, I will have to shoot someone before the end of the play.

BigB: Hey, do you know the password to Cleo’s computer? Pearl: Fuck you, BigB. BigB: Hey!! Pearl: No, you misunderstood, the password is "fuckyouBigB". BigB: Oh, no numbers? Not very safe.

Bdubs: Wow, this parking is as straight as I am. Impulse: I know I should be focused on the fact that you just came out, but HOW DARE YOU INSULT MY PARKING!

Cleo: I’m not being weird. Am I being weird? Scar: Yes, and that’s coming from me.

Bdubs: You’re giving me a sticker? Cleo: Not just a sticker. That is a sticker of a kitty saying “me-wow!” Bdubs: I’m not a preschooler. Cleo: Fine, I’ll take it back- Bdubs: I earned this, back off!

Scott: Do you want to play 20 Questions? Etho: Sure! Etho: Whats your favorite color? Scott, laser fucking focused: Triangle. Do you like men?

Tango: Would you rather kill Pearl, or— Scott: Yes, kill them. Tango: I didn’t say the other thing— Scott: I don’t need to hear it. Pearl: …I’m feeling a little unsafe.

Cleo: I came out here to attack people and I'm honestly having such a good time right now.

Etho: Did you buy eggs like I asked? Skizz: Even better! Etho: What the fuck did you- Skizz: holding up a chicken Her name is Fluffy.

Pearl: Remember that time you dared me to lick a swingset? Jimmy: No, I said "Pearl, don't lick that swingset" and you said "Don't tell me what to do" and licked the swingset.

Impulse: Name a more iconic duo than my crippling fear of abandonment and my anxiety. I’ll wait. Skizz: You and me! Impulse: tearing up Ok.

Cleo: Please could you go to the shop and get a carton of milk, if they have avacodos get six. Scar, coming back from the store with six cartons of milk: They had avacados!

BigB: I’m telling you, my team is competent. Jimmy, rushing in: BigB! Pearl tried to make pasta in the coffee pot and now it's broken!

Scott: When I get murdered, can you make sure I become an unsolved case? Martyn: wHat? Scott: I want to be on Buzzfeed Unsolved. Martyn: Can we go back to the part when you said "when I get murdered"?

Tango: The only thing I'm guilty of is being adorable… …and also assault with a deadly weapon.

Tango: I'm so happy, I could kiss you! Scar: Um…Neat. later Scar, lying face down on their bed: I said "Neat," BigB. Who the fuck says neat these days? It's not neat to say neat but I said it anyways because I'm fucking stupid. BigB, reading a book: Don't beat yourself up too much, Scar. Everyone gets nervous sometimes. Remember what I did when Grian confessed their love for me? Scar: Didn't you thank them? BigB: closes the book and looks at the ceiling I fucking thanked them.

Grian: Poison is a magic transmutation potion that turns people into corpses. BigB: This knife is actually a magic wand. Bdubs: Meet me in the Denny’s parking lot for a wizard duel. Cleo: cocks gun Magic missile. Skizz: What the fuck is wrong with you people.

Pearl: I swear to god I'm the only one here with a braincell. Tango, Scott, Grian, and Etho: ALL HAIL the keeper of the sacred braincell!

Joel: Cleo doesn’t look very happy. Grian: That's their happy. They're just a bitch.

BigB: Why is it that I always lose things as soon as I need them? Pearl: Actually, it's not that you lose things when you need them. You lose them a while before. It's just that you LOOK for things when you need them. BigB: Okay yeah thanks Pearl, that's great but WHERE'S THE FUCKING FIRST AID KIT?

Joel: I’m here for the cult stuff. BigB: How did you find us? Joel: I saw your ad on craigslist.

Tango: All right, y'all! Let's take a vote! Grian: A secret vote. Everyone close your eyes. the Squad closes their eyes Skizz: We don't see the result! Grian: Well, just say your vote out loud. Jimmy: Won't we recognize each other's voices? Joel: Tango has a point.

Pearl: Did you miss me while I was gone? Scott: You were gone?

Skizz: That was so hot, Tango. Tango: I literally called the person who just flirted with you a degenterate dog and told them I hope they get dragged through the streets. Skizz: I'm so in love with you.

Joel: Do you guys want to see a butterfly? Etho: Ooh, yes please! Pearl, with their laptop open: I'm not going to stop working to look at a stupid bug! Joel: It's not a bug though… Pearl: … Etho: … Pearl: Well I still don't want to see. Etho, realizing: Please don't throw- Joel: Whee! throws a stick of butter

Joel: chokes on something Jimmy: Jeez, Joel, don't die on us. Joel: Don't tell me what to do, I'll die whenever the hell I want!

Grian: The waiter at Olive Garden has been grating my cheese for 6 hours now, waiting for me to say when. Customers are screaming. Three people have died. Grian: I will not yield.

Pearl: We’re about to do the taser challenge. You want in? Tango: What's the taser challenge? BigB: We tase eachother, then drink. Tango: How do you win? Pearl: What are you, a lawyer? You want in or not?

Tango: Is this mistletoe? Etho: Uh, no, no, that is basil. Tango: Too bad cause if it was mistletoe I was gonna kiss you. Etho: Yeah, no, it’s still basil.

Tango: What do you call a dictionary on drugs? BigB: If you say "addict-ionary" I swear I will cut you. Tango: I was actually going to say "high definition", but your answer's much better. BigB: …

Bdubs and Cleo are planning to break in somewhere Bdubs: We need to distract the guards. Cleo: Right. Bdubs: What are we gonna do? Cleo: I'm gonna break their elbows while you poke their eyes. Bdubs: Cleo: Bdubs: Deal.

BigB: Scar has no survival skills, their need to win has replaced them. Etho: That can't be true! BigB: Watch this. BigB: Hey Scar, race you to the bottom of the stairs! Scar: Throws themself out a window

Pearl: Jimmy is off at an appointment, so while they’re gone, I’m going to cut the sleeves off all of my shirts. BigB: Why? Pearl: They’re like 90 of my impulse control.

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steviestits · 11 days

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WIP Wednesday - Fic Naming

So, this was supposed to be posted last Wednesday, but well, you guys saw the anon. Anyway, I know it's usually you give me a title and I make up a story to go with it, but I suck at thinking up cool titles, so I thought I'd do a reverse of that game. I'll describe my fics, and you guys send in a title that you think will fit it. Or you can just send words of encouragement if you're as stumped as me.

All of these are ones that have their first chapters finished or are close to being finished. I thought I'd maybe attempt to post a bunch after my birthday. I think I might be slightly less busy then? Though, i feel like I'm jinxing myself by saying that.

And before I forget, WARNING! Dark shit is listed below! Expand the post only if you're into that sort of thing!

Addams Family Values AU - Everything that happened in the Addams Family Values movie happened exactly the same way except that Debbie/Steve lives and it's set in the omegaverse. Argyle is Eddie's adoptive brother and is married to Jonathan. El and Will are Wednesday and Pugsley. The Party are a combination of Joel. While Hopper and Joyce are Lurch and Granny. Eddie is a bit worried that his relationship with his mate will go stale if Steve keeps up these passionate murder attempts, so Argyle helps him think of a way to get him to settle down, which is to get Steve pregnant.

Canon Real DnD - Basically, anything that Eddie makes happen in his campaign happens in real life. It takes place pre-s4 then moves on through s4, but instead of Vecna, Eddie is using his author stand-in as the main villain and in turn grows more powerful. He, of course, abuses this power to make Steve into a blushing virgin who wants Eddie to fuck him and at one point, Eddie proceeds to feminize Steve. I want Steve to get pregnant at some point because of the campaign, I think, but right now, it's just something that's in the planning stages of the later chapters.

Cyberpunk Bitching Drugs - This one is one of the fantasy prompts that I'm expanding on. The cyber network in it isn't science-based and instead runs on magitech (my favorite kind of tech). In this, Eddie runs a pharmaceutical company that produces drugs/potions to help with omega and alpha medical problems. Eddie tricks his intern Dustin into giving Steve something that is supposed to help with his worsening ruts but in reality bitches Steve then Eddie gets him pregnant. There's also some light brainwashing as Eddie uses subliminal messages to manipulate Steve into thinking that he needs help with his ruts in the first place. Going try to get this to go through Steve's pregnancy, so it won't be a one-shot like System Hacked was.

Dark God Cult AU - When he was a kid, Steve was kidnapped and brought up in a cult where he was to be with Eddie (the reincarnation of a dark forest god) before the cops found him and brought him back to this parents. Years later, Steve goes on a camping trip with a couple of friends near where the cult compound used to be and one by one those on the camping trip start being ritualistically murdered. While the murders are happening, Steve begins having visions of himself as a pregnant goddess who makes love with an eldritch abomination aka Eddie. Heavily inspired by the Blair Witch Project, though there are some other horror movies in the mix, too. This one will definitely have a murder husbands vibe by the end of it.

Lost Boys Mermaid AU - The movie Lost Boys, except with mermaids. Steve is brought with his parents when they go out of town for business then they promptly ignore him and go to do their work. As he's wandering around, Steve comes across a supposed metal band, Corroded Coffin, and their lead singer, Eddie, becomes particularly enthralled with Steve, so much so that he begins turning Steve into a mer and his mate. Though, it does branch off from the movie in that, unlike David, Eddie succeeds in making Steve his mermaid bride and bringing him into his murderous pod.

Mummy (1999) AU - Based on the movie The Mummy (obviously) and has Steve as a former archeologist, who tanked his career after returning scarred from the horrors he saw when he was drafted into the Great War (WWI) and now more focuses on drowning himself to forget while attempting to help boost Robin's, his adoptive sister's, career. Nicknamed "King Steve" by some of the bars he frequently visits. Eddie is a Medjai warrior, who let a French Foreign Legion soldier go, not expecting her to survive the harsh desert. Nancy defied his expectations, and now Eddie must fix his mistake before the mummy that his people have guarded for centuries is released. There's also a small soulmates au plotline buried in it between Eddie and Steve due to me working the events of the Mummy Returns into the plot.

Omega Transmigration - Loosely, and I mean LOOSELY based on the show Outlander (which I've never seen). Omega Steve gets sent back through time and space to a medieval world where magic is real and elves are rebelling against their human oppressors. After helping an Elven boy with his modern day medical techniques, due to him being an EMT, Steve is brought directly into the stronghold of the elves. The leader there, Wayne, doesn't believe that Steve's intentions were altruistic and wants to have Steve hanged as a spy regardless. Eddie steps in and claims Steve is his true mate. Steve then goes through a process that turns him into a beautiful Elven omega and directly ties his fate to that of the Elven clan's. This one probably won't be that dark and will more follow Steve's struggle to fit in with the clan along with the war with the humans itself.

Omega Rehab - Uses a Victorian Clockwork Punk setting where Steve's parents are traditionalists. After getting into a few fights with alpha and running out of etiquette schools, Steve's parents convince him to try one last place before they leave him alone for the rest of his life, which is the Munson Omega Rehabilitation Center. Steve goes, believing that it will be more of the same, but the Munson Center has a different, more "scientific" way of rehabilitating the omegas that are sent to them. Eddie, of course, personally takes charge of Steve's training to turn him into the perfect little omega, who will happily carry the pups of his alpha without complaint. This one includes Steve training with mechanical sex dolls like in HoLN.

Pet Succubus AU - Steve comes from a family of witches who used demons to power their way of life. The higher up demons finally caught onto their schemes and slaughtered most of the family. Eddie took Steve as a pet, transforming him to have a woman's body before training him by way of fucking machine to become a sex addict. Once Steve is trained, Eddie turns Steve into a succubus and shows off his pretty little pet every chance he gets, keeping the new demoness stuffed full and satisfied. There isn't a lot of plot to this one, just more of an excuse to write extended scenes of Steve being trained by a machine as Eddie watches.

Royal Hypnotism AU - Someone called me a sick fuck over the original prompt, so I decided to make this one worthy of the name-calling. Set in a futuristic magitech society, King Eddie comes across Steve's small village and falls for him. He secretly buys Steve from his family and takes him with him to the summit where he's meeting his friends and fellow kings to discuss what's going on in their kingdoms. In Gareth's kingdom, where they're meeting, there's been some small rebellions, but Gareth stopped them by kidnapping the leaders and putting them through a feminization facility/factory and hypnotizing them in order to rewrite their memories. He proposes to send Steve through with the next batch and turn him into Grant's sister. Eddie agrees, and Steve is turned into a princess.

Time Travel AU - Redoing this one slightly, but I'm going to put it on the list anyway. What's different from when I first posted the snippet is that Steve is going to be feminized due to the portal that sends him back to the 80's. One, to make it more understandable why Steve doesn't recognize himself before he goes to the past. Then two, so that Eddie can get him pregnant, because I like getting Steve pregnant. Plot is the same though, Dustin sends Steve back in time to be the big sibling he always wanted and Eddie seduces Steve so that he marries him and stays in the past as a woman to become his wife and the mother of his children. Eddie might go a little darker than simply seducing Steve, but we'll see how it goes as I get through more chapters of the story.

Upside Down Transformation - In this one, everything that happened in s4 happened, only difference is that Eddie survived and Vecna is perma dead. They all return to their normal lives when Eddie notices that he's slowly changing, getting taller and stronger. His dick is getting bigger and thicker, too. He notices, also, that Steve is changing, too, but doesn't realize that it's to a different extent. Steve is humiliated to find out that he's going through the opposite kind of transformation, becoming more feminized. He tries to isolate himself, but Eddie barges in on him and catches Steve masturbating with his new pussy. The two fuck. They're basically the equivalent of alphas and omegas because of their bat bites and are the only ones in the world. I kind of plan to make it just a porny one-shot, but then because it's set in canon, my brain wants the government to capture them and experiment on them. So, it'll probably be a series, maybe, if this one receives positive feedback once it's posted.

#show: stranger things #steddie #my fics #dead dove do not eat #wip wednesday #see! i do know the days of the week!

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lakemichigans · 1 year

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tlou episode 9 thoughts!!

- I KNEW IT I KNEW IT I'M SO HAPPYYYY this has always been my favorite theory for why ellie is immune and it also means that, however unlikely, there actually could be other immune people out there. it wouldn't benefit the narrative to meet any other immune people yet, but in the future...? like a third game...?

- baby ellie just popped right out huh fksjfkd i guess the quickest way to speed up labor is to kill a zombie

- hearing ashley johnson's voice, especially hearing her use her sweet baby voice brought me to tears immediately

- joel seems a lot more aware & understanding of why ellie is so checked out, but still tries to cheer her up. in the game he's well-meaning but pretty much clueless. i like this change!!

- the giraffe scene was perfect, 10/10, no notes

- "i'll follow you wherever you go" 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

- i'm a fucking mess because of that conversation by the medical tents, that was an incredible moment to add and i wasn't expecting it at all. the look on ellie's face when she realizes that it's her, she's the one that "healed all wounds"

- no sarah photograph? :(

- "we didn't tell her, we didn't cause her any fear" FUCK! that's the problem!!! the problem is that ellie would die for the cure if you gave her the option, but you were too chicken shit to tell her the truth! everyone in this room has their own (selfish) motivations and no one is thinking about ellie, not really, not even joel. IT MAKES ME CRAZY AHHHHH YOU'RE ALL COWARDS

- the hospital shootout was everything i wanted and so much more. joel found his reason to live and god help him, he'll fight for it -- no matter how many lives he needs to take to get there. it was so intense and the music was beautiful and it was just gory enough to make you feel the weight of the brutality without feeling like it's a cheesy slasher. also loved how many times joel reloading or switched guns. and his dead eyes throughout the whole scene are haunting

- wow, killing jerry happened so damn fast!! in the game, you can stand in front of him forever and he'll just keep pointing his knife at you (and in the remake he pleads with joel, "this is our future, think of all the lives she'll save.") but i love the decision to shoot him in the blink of an eye. joel is beyond caring about anything other than ELLIE ELLIE ELLIE. i do like that he doesn't kill the nurses though, because it's a purely practical mission: save ellie. everyone else is just in the way.

- no abby sighting? :( i really thought there would be one :(

- i'm a little bummed that the themes were spelled out so specifically by marlene and joel's last conversation, but eh, whatever. TV audiences tend to need things spelled out clearer lol. i'm a little surprised they took out the line "how long until she's torn apart by a pack of clickers? that is, if she hasn't been raped and murdered first". considering what happened last episode, i felt that line would ring more true than ever. kinda underwhelmed by this confrontation tbh, which is sad because it's so pivotal

- ohhhh god he expanded upon the lie 😭 that hurt so much worse. i'm devastated for ellie

- joel talking about sarah felt more painful than i previously thought possible. also adorable how he doesn't want to offend ellie by calling her "not girly" ajfjsjfksj

- maybe i'm just blinded by my love for the game, but i don't like any of the dialogue they changed in the final scene. joel's original speech is SO poignant and perfect but i didn't get the same emotion from this one. and there was no glance at his watch :( i would've preferred keeping riley's fate vague (we already knew anyway), because "i'm still waiting for my turn" is so much more emotional to me. ugh. i'm a little peeved they changed so much about this scene that has long been considered as close to perfect as possible :(

- i don't want to end on a bad note so let me just say that the entire experience of watching this show has been incredible beyond words. seeing a game i love so much be treated with care and passion, opening up a whole new world for people who never would have known about it before this... it's just amazing. i'm so grateful that this show exists and feels like a love letter to the fans rather than a cash grab. it's so damn beautiful

#the last of us hbo #tlou spoilers #the last of us spoilers

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lockhvrts · 4 years

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Hey Em! How you feeling about tlou2? I'm still sobbing 😭

hi rilee :’) hope you're doing well❤️ i actually wanted to ask you too lmao and same this game wrecked me

..okay so i have many thoughts n things i want to say id actually just would link you a review that goes more into detail and is more cohesive than my messy essay so i’ll try my best and keep this short as possible tho and i apologize for my english lmfao :

SPOILERS FOR TLOU2 OBVIOUSLY

also if anyone disagrees with me and is about to send me an essay why i am a h*mophobic, tr*nsphobic and alt r*ght piece of trash bc i didnt praise the shit out of tlou2

i'm glad that you enjoyed the game so much that its a masterpiece and 10/10 in your eyes , i honestly respect your opinion (and i wanted to love this game too) but maybe rethink what you're about to do and let other people have different opinions without bashing them? it literally doesn't affect you in any way that i didn't enjoy it ( and no it wasn't enjoyable for me bc a character i like died)

postive:

the gameplay is fluid and responsive (there were some minor issues but its still great), definitely improved compared to the first game, id love to have a little bit of more enemy variety bc it got kind of tiring after the 20th encounter that basically felt the same as the ones before (tho i appreciate the stealth gameplay , sneaking around the map and taking out enemies while being prone like in mgsv was thrilling)

animation, graphics , level design, acting, sound design: ND succeeded in creating another jaw dropping immersive cinematic experience is all i have to say, this is one the best looking games i've ever played (i cant believe a 7 yr old machine can run this game)

music: i'm glad that gustavo santaolalla is back for the sequel! it wouldn't feel the same without him, his music adds so much to the experience

negative: the controversial part lmao

story, characters: I’ll be honest i prefer tlou1 + left behind story wise. i personally don't like the structure of it in the sequel, too many empty side characters, some character / plot decisions generally didn't make sense for me, the dialogue/writing felt out of place and kind of odd sometimes (compared to the scenes from the flashbacks with joel and ellie) and the last hours were dragged out for some reason i just wanted to be done as quickly as possible with it tbh

jesse was your typical nice guy™ who will definitely be killed off to move the plot forward. the only thing i remember is that he’s dinas ex boyfriend + father of jj dont get me wrong i like and didn't mind him but he has nothing interesting to add to the story. also funny how they literally did not mention him once after his death

owen and the other WLF members were just kinda there..? i don't have much else to say about them besides that they felt empty i tried to understand them and their stories but i didn't care for them in the end its prob my fault but henry, sam, bill and riley were more compelling to me

lev and yara were great i liked them both , its just that especially lev was just there to make abby seem more humane, i didn't like that ND tried to create a similar dynamic between them like in the first game with ellie and joel it didn't particularly make me like her more speaking of which:

abby shows barely to no remorse for the things she did. what she did show was that she enjoyed torturing joel, killing seraphites and almost knowingly murdering a pregnant women (dina) and now ND shoves us this forced narrative of her being a good person into our face like how she would've accepted to die for the cure, has friends and a dog that she treats well (which we as ellie were forced to kill to make her seem even more like a villain in contrast to abby) , takes care of yara and lev (granted out of guilt for joel maybe? but i'm not sure) also making her seem more humane bc she has a fear of height? but abby would kill anyone who is not on her good side this time without a problem as we’ve seen plenty while playing as her what i'm surprised about is that i weirdly didn't hate her or anything guess they succeeded in making me feel some pity for her in the end

yes i also had some issues with the way tommy, ellie and joel were portrayed but i think i'm gonna stop here and give you a

TLDR:

gameplay ,graphics, animation, acting etc: solid 9/10

story (structure, writing, dialogue,characters etc) : 4-5/10 seems harsh but i am comparing it to the first game, if this was a different ip maybe an 8/10

all in all a its 6-7/10 for me, this game made me feel emotions (not particularly positive ones lmfao) i've never felt in any other medium before, only the first game comes close.

tlou2 is bleak, hopeless and messy at times with some rare light moments like the flashbacks of joel and ellie that i enjoyed the most and wished we’d gotten more of while also exploring joel and ellie's present relationship on her quest of finding the truth about the hospital incident and maybe also learning more about her immunity alas this was not the case as seemingly promoted by neil and some misleading trailers.

would i want to play this again? to be honest not really I’ll maybe try clearing the trophies but going back to just casually play it like i did with tlou1 no i don't think so for now.

#asks #apocalypsekid #finally done this took me way too long #i am actually scared to publish this but f it lmao #also my grammar is awful but yeah #tlou2 spoilers #(just in case)#txt.personal #long post #why was this tagged as g**ingedit DHJSGDG #*edit bc i phrased it weird:#i dont hate tlou2 i can see what nd was trying to do; the story just had pacing and writing issues IMO #(the fact that a character i liked died has nothing to do with my relatively low rating)

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