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nxsmss · 3 years

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Movies I watched in February

fyi, I have zero knowledge on how to professionally rate or review a movie. I am not gonna pay attention to every little detail. these rating are simply based on how much I enjoyed/liked the movie

Follow me

Unhinged

In Time

Avengers Age of Ultron

Songbird

Star Trek

Step up all in

Project Almanac

Ant Man

Space Sweepers

Christiane F.

Jurassic World

Jurassic World the fallen kingdom

1. follow me

A social media personality travels with his friends to Moskow to capture new content for his successful vlog. Always pushing the limits and catering to a growing audience, they enter a cold world of mystery, excess, and danger.

starring: Keegan Allen, Holland Roden, Denzel Whitaker, Ronen Rubenstein, Pasha D. Lchnikoff

the end was very predictable and i pretty much already knew halfway through the movie what was gonna happen. but it still was quite thrilling and I did enjoy watching it

6.5/10

2. unhinged

After a confrontation with an unstable man at an intersection, a woman becomes becomes the target of his rage.

starring: Russel Crowe, Caren Pistorius, Gabriel Batemen

hm idk, I didn’t really like it, my sister didn’t really like it but my mom did, I think. it just seemed so, no overdramatic but just too much in a way

3/10

3. in time

In a future where people stop aging after 25 and need to buy time to live, the rich become immortal while others cease to exist. So, Will is on the run with a hostage in a desperate bid to survive.

starring: Justin Timberlake, Amanda Seyfried, Cillian Murphy, Olivia Wilde, Alex Pettyfer

yes, such a good movie. Ireally like the concept. can recommend

7/10

4. avengers age of ultron

When Tony Stark and Bruce Banner try to jump-start a dormant peacekeeping program called Ultron, things go horribly wrong and it’s up to Earth’s mightiest heroes to stop the villanious Ultron from enacting his terrible plan.

starring: Robert Downy Jr., Chris Evans, Mark Ruffalo, Chris Hemsworth, Scarlett Johanson, Jeremy Renner, Elizabeth Olsen, Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Paul Bettany

hell yes, one of my favourite marvel movies. Wanda and Pietro.. Hawkeye.. all the little jokes throughout the entire movie and of course the scene where everyone tries to lift thor’s hammer, what’s not to love about this movie

10/10

5. songbird

In 2024 a pandemic ravages the world and it’s cities. Centering a handful of people as they naviagete the obstacles currently hindering society: disease, marital law, quarantine, and vigilantes.

starring: K.J. Apa, Sofia Carson, Demi Moore, Bradley Whitford, Peter Stromare, Alexandra Daddario, Craig Robinson

I really enjoyed watching this. yeah sure, the ending was obvious but I was still glued to the screen. I also felt super weird watching this, kinda surreal because we are basically living a more harmless version of this rn. I really liked seeing sofia carson in such a movie, I’ve only seen her in the descendants so this was a bit of a change haha. I’m not that big of a fan of kj but he was great as well and i really loved his characters style.

7/10

6. star trek

The brash James T. Kirk tries to live up to his father’s legacy with Mr. Spock keeping him in check as a vengeful Romulan from the future creates black holes to destroy the Federation one planet at a time.

starring: Chris Pine, Zachary Quinto, Leonard Nimoy, Carl Urban, Eric Bana, Bruce Greenwood, Zoe Zaldana, Simon Pegg, John Cho, Anton Yelchin

I put it on because I wanted to have some background noise while playing sims but I ended up playing like 20 minutes and then just watching the movie haha I forgot how good it was, and the others as well, aaand I totally forgot carl urban was in it, so that was a little surprise. anyways, can recommend watching them if you’re into sci-fi action movies but at the same time, if you’re into that I’m pretty sure you’ve already watched them.

7.5/10

bonus: I also watched star trek beyond the other day but this time I was barely paying attention so I can't really say too much, but it's also quite good👍🏻

7. step up all in

All-stars from the previous Step up installments come together in glittering Las Vegas, battling for a victory that could define their dreams and their careers.

starring: Ryan Guzman, Briana Evigan, Adam Sevani, Misha Gabriel Hamilton, Sephen Stevo Jones, David Schreibman, Mari Koda, Alyson Stoner, Izabella Miko

definetly one of my favourite dance movies. highly recommend it!! I’d like it more without the romancde but it’s fine, I guess, I can live with it haha and the last performance... wow just wow that’s all I can say to that. y’all go watch it

9/10

8. project almanac

A group of teens discover secret plans of a time machine, and construct one. However, things start to get out of control.

starring: Jonny Weston, Sofia Black-D’Elia, Sam Lerner, Allen Evangelista, Virginia Gardner

okay... I did enjoy watching it! the beginning was a little slow imo but then it just got more and more intense which was kinda nice. god, at some point the main guy kept making the wrong decisions and that was very frustrating to watch. the ending was alright, spoiler ahead (I guess) I would have liked the ending more if it was the exact same as the beginning, meaning that the movie is just one big time loop and the events from the movie were about to repeat themselves. but that's just my opinion🤷🏻‍♀️

6.5/10

9. ant man

Armed with a super-suit with the astonishing ability to shrink in scale but increase in strength, cat burglar Scott Lang must embrace his inner hero and help his Mentor Dr. Pym, plan and pull off a heist that will save the world.

starring: Paul Rudd, Michael Douglas, Evangeline Lilly, Corey Stoll, Michael Pena, Bobby Cannavale, David Dastmalchian, T.I.

another one of my favorite mcu movies. it's just fun and easy and doesn't have a lot of pain in it. the giant ant it's my favorite part haha I want it as a pet

9/10

10. space sweepers

Set in the year 2092 and follows the crew of a space junk collector ship called The Victory. When they discover a humanoid robot named Dorothy that's known to be a weapon of mass destruction, they get involved in a risky business deal.

starring: Song Joong-Kim, Kim Tae-ri, Seon-kyu Jin, Hyang-gi Kim, Richard Armitage, Ye-Rin Park

I really loved this movie. I cried like 6 times haha, which came unexpected. (or maybe it's because I'm suppose to get my period any day now) I did not think I was going to enjoy this movie as much as I did, at all. it was fun, it was exciting, it was sad (even my dad said that) the plot was good, the visual effects were amazing, it did feel like I was watching this movie for like 5 hours but not in a bad way and I am now kinda emotionally attached to the characters haha (I might do a rewatch). another thing I really liked was the language/synchronization. in the original version they speak mostly korean and english but also some other languages and it's the same in the synchronizations. the dialogue of the main characters is in the language you pick but every other character (I guess) is a different language and I absolutely love that. I highly recommend watching this!!

also, its was super weird seeing Richard Armitage not as a dwarf hahaha

10/10

11. christiane f.

A teen girl in 1970's Berlin becomes addicted to heroin. Everything in her life slowly begins to distort and disappear as she befriends a small crew of junkies and falls in love with a drug-abusing male prostitute.

starring: Natja Brunckhorst, Thomas Haustein, Jens Kuphal, Christiane Reichelt

I binged the series the other day and after the last episode this movie was in the "watch next" thingy idk and I thought "well, why not" and watched it. good movie, definitely!! I really liked that they didn't show the highs of doing heroin but focused on the negative effects it has on someone and what it's doing to your body. it is a super realistic but very very dark movie. the actors were all about 15/16 years old and looked very young which was a good and kinda disturbing thing because christiane and her friend were like 13/14 when that all happened and it made you realise that there were kids doing all that stuff

9/10

12. jurrasic world

A new theme park, built on the original site of Jurassic Park, creates a genetically modified hybrid dinosaur, the Indominus Rex, which escapes containment and goes on a killing spree.

starring: Chris Pratt, Bryce Dallas Howard, Ty simpkins, Nick Robinson, Irrfan Khan, Vincent D'Onofrio

13. jurassic world fallen kingdom

When the island's dormant volcano begins roaring to life, Owen and Claire mount a campaign to rescue the remaining dinosaurs from this extinction-level event.

starring: Chris Pratt, Bryce Dallas Howard, Rafe Spall, Justice Smith, Daniella Pineda, Isabella Sermon

I am tired and don't really want to say all that much other than both of them are very good and I do like them. good action/adventure movies. can definitely recommend them. I definitely like the first one more because it feels like (just a little bit) that the main story in the second one is the same as in the first one, someone creates a new dinosaur species to make more money and something goes terribly wrong along the way. but it's still entertaining!

jurassic wolrd: 7.5/10

jurassic world fallen kingdom: 7/10

#movies i watched in #lara talks to herself #also if someone wants to you can drop some recommendations in my asks/dms/whererver you want #movies #review #follow me #unhinged #in time #age of ultron #songbird #star trek #step up all in #project almanac #ant man #space sweepers #christiane f #jurassic world

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lieutenant-pride · 5 years

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i was just thinking about that rant i made about avengers infinity war and how i saw avengers endgame a little while ago, well after it got out of theaters because i wasn’t truly willing to give marvel money for that, and now i just wanna go off the hook about the movie because i can ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

i’m not even putting it in a read-more for spoiler purposes so much as putting it in a read-more because it might end up being long, but there are spoilers ahead anyway so for those five people who haven’t seen endgame and do care, be wary

funny thing is, i actually didn’t hate this like i expected to when i heard that time travel was one of its core constructs, but you know what i still don’t think it was worth the hype altogether and here is why

perhaps to make up for the fact that they didn’t kill any of the OG avengers, or for the fact that they probably didn’t need to exist in the first place, the snap apparently killed literally every single member of Hawkeye’s family that is not Clint himself. i guess we need an excuse for him to turn into Ronin, so let’s make his family expendable, why not

this film does us the discourtesy of confirming shuri’s fate as one of the fallen from last movie and the russos will pay dearly for this

the idea of destroying the stones with their own power was already proven a thing in the last movie when wanda did just that with the mind stone (while holding off five other infinity stones and a titan worth of power with one of her hands, by the way) but given the massive shockwave that occurred from THAT stone’s destruction? are you really willing to tell me he snapped again, had half his body disintegrate, and then the glove with all six stones just puffed into smoke?

actually how cool would that have been? that they arrive on the garden planet of whatever and thanos is just a fucking toasty corpse in a crater, and they realize what he had to do for that to happen? now i feel a little cheated

man, i knew from square one when i saw the first few trailers for this film that okoye was gonna get sidelined HARD, and she had maybe one or two spoken lines in the whole film? i get it, there are a lot of characters to go over in this big epic conclusion to the MCU’s biggest property/ies, but they definitely could’ve given the black panther cast a bit more love than this. i think i’m just salty over that bit though

did ronin kill in the comics? was that a thing he did? was he basically clint barton going jason todd for a little while, was that what it was? because please point me in the direction of those books if so

i really, really can’t argue much about the pym particle bits and the quantum realm (was that the one?) because time travel is a lot like nuclear physics when it comes to movies and comics and just works however the writer needs it to work in that situation, whether that refers to the means or the ends. i am glad however that antman gets this much attention as if he’s a legit member of the avengers. you know. like how he was one of the og members in the comics.

you know what i can argue about? how they try to sell their first attempt at time travel anWAIT JUST A MINUTE I FORGOT ABOUT BIG BANNER WHAT IS THIS HOW DID HE EVEN MANAGE THAT SHIT

i guess he had like five years to study and figure out how to make himself hulk on the outside without sacrificing the banner brains, but i’m very curious as to what the purpose is in doing that, since he was having more issues releasing hulk during the previous film and also the fact that he really had zero reason to fuse the two together. like, what threats was banner gonna face? what evildoers did he need hulk work for? if he needed some muscle of his own he could’ve just worked out????

you can also say that was bruce’s character arc during the first film actually, which is fine, but i’d like to note that if it is, then his character arc is resolved completely off-screen

listen, i get it. tony and pepper are a thing that had to happen, according to literally every film before this. i still think pepper deserves better or at least someone who doesn’t cause her as much stress as tony has caused for her. i mean i guess if that boy brings in the money though, do what you gotta ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

we get one scene of ronin at work and i kind of love it? i kinda wish we got to see more of his work, but i get why we don’t. this is like, the best thing that clint has to offer in this film

oh right i almost forgot, that first attempt at time travel with scott “having time moved through him.” cute gag, but this definitely doesn’t fly with scott’s first mingling with time travel and the quantum realm or whatever, and if we’re to assume they mostly repeated what they did during the post-credits scene of antman and the wasp, then why did this even have a risk of happening????

that was a cute gag though, mainly because paul rudd is a treasure

and since i’m discussing the time travel bits: the time travel in this movie is handled fairly well, and it introduces the prospect of timelines diverging rather than just having one singular strand of time flow! great! cool! but this has some bumps here and there in the film for the sake of drama, and this is the first instance:

clint travelling back to see his family for just a split moment of time. this is a moment that toys with rules constructed later, though i think that is a mixed bag and maybe i missed this detail. in every instance after this one, when the cast wants to return to a specific time in the future (their actual timeline and present) they sync up their time gps thing, but in this case? clint has no chance to do that. we don’t cut out a single second of his trip in the past, and i don’t recall him even looking at the time gps ONCE, and yet he can be forcibly pulled back to the present???

this is actually one of the only faults i can think of in the time travel, and they probably actually set that gps ahead of time, so whatever, maybe they actually handled time travel well here???

some o y’all people out here had the audacity to tell me that tony stark was the one who called steve roger’s ass “america’s ass” when it was in fact scott lang, and tony in fact called to question steve’s ass in that scene, and it is YOU i will not forgive for this heinous error

tony actually did nothing wrong in attaining the tesseract; he just got his head smacked in by a surprise hulk coming out of the stairwell

actually this made me remember a thing: couldn’t they have sent someone to grab the tesseract in asgard in case something went wrong in new york? they were right about picking the right year and time to get three infinity stones in new york, but they also managed to pick the right year and time to get two stones in asgard, so why not snatch that up as a failsafe?

thor really fucked over an alternate timeline by grabbing mjolnir from them, huh. cap couldn’t return that shit, after all; they need mjolnir for when we finally get the Mighty Thor. like, good moments between him and his mom, and that whole “i’m still worthy” thing was great, but are we gonna talk about the timeline that got fucked over for that???

so did they not discuss WHY they needed two people going to vormir ahead of time, or what? did nebula not tell them? she totally did, right? like did she not mention WHY gamora didn’t come back with thanos after he got the soul stone? why are they surprised when the mention of a sacrifice comes into play???

apparently only women die in vormir, and usually to advance the character arcs of men. i dunno i wouldn’t be too sore about this hawkeye sacrificing himself

i’ll be honest i don’t care MUCH about black widow but like let’s be real how much was hawkeye giving to the narrative???

also apparently they can’t do anything about getting nat back, which is inherently bullshit by the fact that gamora still exists in the past and you could very easily bring a nat from another timeline without fucking up yours. it’s fine; you had no problem doing that with mjolnir

how did they shrink the entire warship thanos was on exactly, and how long did they take to get that tech right???

what exactly is thanos’ weirdass boomerang blade made of that it can shred a vibranium shield?

anyway so they pay homage to every hero from the past twenty-odd films real quick, and they make the right choice in putting the black panther crew first, but i can’t help but think about how this is all just fanservice

wanda comes in to remind us that thanos ain’t shit without the infinity stones and NEARLY KILLS HIM ON HER OWN so someone explain to me why she doesn’t AFTER she gets back up???? like, can we assume killing thanos would put an end to most of this fight and send the rest of his forces running?

i already mentioned the fanservice level that came with the heroes entering on the scene, right? let’s not forget that the shot of all (minus one) the marvel women coming together is also mostly fanservice with no real meaning and it could’ve been cut from the movie and the narrative would not be too heavily adjusted, just as a reminder that marvel isn’t really treating the women of their properties well on film

thanos got real fucked up after two snaps and banner got fucked up after one snap, and you’re seriously telling me tony - a regular ass human being - lasted long enough to snap at all???

seeing peter and ned reunite with one another (i guess they both got snapped if they’re both still high school students ACTUALLY DID PETER’S WHOLE SCHOOL GET SNAPPED OR WHAT HAPPENED????)

okay but actually, the peter and ned reuniting scene got me much harder than any amount of tony’s death and funeral

seeing the wakanda crew serving up looks during tony’s funeral just reminds me that okoye got maybe two lines in the whole film, t’challa got Maybe One, and shuri got shafted for lines, and that makes me sad

i think Old Cap reuniting with sam on the bench is great and all, and a real good closing to steve’s character, however i have some questions to ask about it, namely how steve ended up in the same timeline after we made ABUNDANTLY CLEAR we were playing by diverging timeline rules, unless what you’re trying to tell me is that there was an Old Steve that just existed in our timeline the whole time and the fact that we never focused on Peggy significantly enough allowed yall to sneak that in

i also have to ask how in god’s name y’all didn’t take note of the man sitting at the bench out by the lake where you were performing your time jumping shenanigans?????

but yeah overall not actually a bad conclusion. tony’s dead, so that’s a plus. we won’t get any more of america’s ass in these films, which is a minus, but it could be worse

#rant #avengers endgame #endgame spoilers #because we still marking those i guess #i dunno i just wanted to rant about it

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ignisosculo · 5 years

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hello, beautiful humans ! i’m frankie and i’m very excited to be here. of course, i’m super duper late because let’s be honest, i was a bit unprepared and then i had a very hectic day, so it’s safe to assume that i’m literally rushing to post this. please note that since i’m starting out with two muses ( pray 4 me ), i’m gonna introduce them both here, under the read more, & hopefully with enough context if anyone is interested in plotting things out and whatnot ... so this might be a tad bit longer ! also, i think it’s very important to see detective pikachu in a car seat. thank you & goodnight.

𝐉𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐍 𝐆𝐎𝐋𝐃𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐈𝐍.

☾ ▹ ° ⋅ paul rudd / forty-nine / cis male ; have you had the chance to meet jonathan goldstein ? he has lived in old sprigg for most of his life, gaining a reputation for being quite charismatic, reliable, quirky & tense. this heterosexual leo can be found around dubois bakery and he works as an architect. most people tend to associate them with an artist’s desk and piles of sketches.〈 loved by frankie, 23, cst, she/her. 〉

this vampire guy right here was born and bred in old sprigg, missouri, so old sprigg isn’t just a small town for him. his family had money so he had an a-okay upbringing. parents were pretty strict, having a set of rules for john and his siblings. he’s the oldest of four; one brother & two sisters, so as you can assume, the goldsteins were a crazy, jewish ménage.

growing up, he always had a keen interest in architecture. he’d point out the many buildings whenever they traveled. little johnny’s goal was to become an architect. before that, john wanted to be an astronaut, but that’s besides the point. he went to usc and graduated with a bachelor of architecture degree.

deciding to stay in california for a few years after graduating, he found a job at a design firm. starting out as an intern wasn’t too shabby, though. he’s a talented guy and the owners of the studio noticed his talent ... after 3 years, almost a little too late. however, he couldn’t find it in his heart to say ‘no’ to becoming a part of the team.

worked as an architect for 15 years before moving back home. however, he’d left behind the opportunity to start his own design firm. prior to coming back, his long-term relationship ended and was absolutely devastated. he’s STILL as single as a missing pair of socks. tragic. [ 37 years old ] : returned despite how heartbroken he was.

he’s one of those fun uncles. he’s got a couple of nieces and nephews. the family keeps growing and growing, then there’s jonathan: single but he doesn’t mind one bit. or does he ? doesn’t believe in marriage, so give him someone to love who might believe the same thing about a piece of paper ?

living in california, he traveled twice a year to old sprigg to visit his old pals and family, so you might’ve seen him around. goodbyes kind of suck, so he isn’t one to say goodbye. whenever he had/has to leave for a while, he will say: ‘see you later’ or ‘i’ll be back’ with a peace sign, trying to avoid making a reference to the terminator movies.

not an important note/quick summary: was away from missouri for 19 years. graduated from university of southern california. intern to full-time employee. pleased as fuck. met someone and dated them for a long ass time. she ended it. came back to old sprigg. heartbroken. moved on. been home for 12 years. single af. perhaps too old to become a parent / low-key gives up. works at home. active. constantly travels due to work. a busy bee, workaholic.

personality wise: confident in communication skills, helps others feel confident if permitted, positively confident without being boastful and egotistical, lowkey lives a carpe diem personality, able to be trusted, honest & often times too straightforward but means well, creative af, quirky and witty sense of humor ( if it isn’t written out that way sometimes, i apologize beforehand because i think of witty things to say a day too late ), regardless of being charming and whatnot, he’s tense; will become anxious and nervous at random times of the day. easy-going. / more to be added.

aesthetics: an artist’s desk in a design studio ( aka home ), a shit ton of sketches in piles basically overflowing his home, planners filled to the brim with important dates regarding personal life and work, etc. / more to be added.

wanted connections: give me everything and anything. im’s are OPEN !

𝐀𝐘𝐄𝐋𝐄𝐓 𝐀𝐋-𝐀𝐙𝐖𝐀́𝐑

☾ ▹ ° ⋅ inbar lavi / thirty-four / cis female ; have you had the chance to meet ayelet al-azwár ? she has lived in old sprigg for seven years, gaining a reputation for being quite ambitious, good-natured, sensitive & worrisome. this bisexual pisces can be found around the clover and she works as a veterinarian. most people tend to associate them with white coats and messy hair buns.〈 loved by frankie, 23, cst, she/her. 〉

this girl has a love and hate relationship with her name. not only is it hebrew for ‘deer, gazelle’ but her mom’s constant reminder that it ‘fits’ her makes her give up. letty is, in fact, her nickname. she’ll introduce herself as dr. al-azwár if you’re stopping by the old sprigg veterinary clinic for your furry lil friend’s check-up and whatnot.

she grew up in a jewish household in brooklyn, new york. the al-azwárs are of moroccan and polish descent, so she grew up learning hebrew and arabic, plus a few other languages. probably a linguist. honestly, she never stops learning in general. if there’s a library, then knowledge is power. was in ap classes through the school years... including college. but she wouldn’t consider herself a genius. always pressured herself to be the best. she’s a damn perfectionist.

with her parents permission, she had a job when she was 16 years of age, so had been earning money ever since — dreaming of attending college. thankfully, mom and dad were more than okay with her wanting to become a veterinarian. they supported letty in every step of the way. which came to a surprise for her but she didn’t question them at all.

earned her doctor of veterinarian medicine degree ( dvm ) when she was 23. took a gap year before attending [ name of college ]. pretty fucking proud of herself, even though there were pretty hard obstacles along the way, and she was up for any challenges. but let’s face it, life after college can be tough af with landing your dream job. especially in new york.

managing on getting her degree, she worked two part-time jobs to be able to afford rent, since she decided to move to manhattan afterwards. just 2 words: big mistake. letty isn’t the type of person to ask for help, considering she is still paying off school. it’d been 2 years until she realized that the best choice for her was to move states. well after paying her taxes and bills, and making a budget. at that point, she was on the verge of having a mental breakdown.

giving her landlord the heads up, the first thing she did was notify her parents that she was selling her studio apartment and moving back to brooklyn, and into her childhood home. asking if it was all right because she’d refuse to accept their money and advise them of their retirement plan, hoping to care for them when the time came. a little superstitious, letty knocks on wood every time.

choosing to move to old sprigg, missouri was completely random. however, she had the desires of moving to a small town. the first thing she did was buy a ticket to missouri and visited the charming town. she fell in love with old sprigg; it had / has its charm. how long did she stay ? A WEEK, and it was enough for her to make the decision.

for the past seven years, she has lived in missouri and worked as the vet at its clinic ( totally forgot to mention she lived with her parents for 2 years beforehand ) and couldn’t be happier. letty can be found hanging out at the clover with a glass of wine in hand with a book in her hand.

personality wise: has the strongest desire and determination to succeed. kind, friendly, patient. the mom friend to people she’s closet to. concerned more with the needs and wishes of others than her own. has a quick & delicate appreciation of others’ feelings, especially with animals. inclined to worry, a clinical worrier. introverted but ambivert. / more to be added.

aesthetics: white lab coats, messy hair buns, curly hair, pencil skirts, etc. / more to be added.

wanted connections: give me everything and anything. im’s are OPEN !

discord: i constantly change my username lol so please ask for it, if you prefer to plot through there; i’d happily give it to you. c:

#sprigg.intro #this took me a lil over 3 hrs #i am impressed af #according to tumblr‚ i have zero ( 0 ) posts .....#and i’m late !#it’s almost 2 am and i need sleep #but i must interact first lol

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anhed-nia · 5 years

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SMILE PRETTY

This is not a good movie, and I can't stop thinking about it. It is barely competent, technically, and I'm not sufficiently confident that it sets the right tone in its discussion of its excruciatingly difficult subject. However, I can't seem to stop thinking about it, so I guess I have to record my feelings here, even though I am hesitant to force anyone else to think about this. Reader be warned.

[N.B. I literally gave myself a panic attack writing this. What started out as an intellectualizing assessment of a troubling film turned into a long, grueling, extremely detailed account of my full personal understanding of sexual abuse. If that sounds like it is going to cost you sleep, please do not proceed.

On a further note, in this piece, I often use the terms "victim" and "survivor" interchangeably. I understand the importance of being able to identify as a survivor, rather than wear the inappropriately subjugating and finalizing mantle of victim. In this case, it is necessary for me to use the term "victim" to differentiate between the ongoing "survivor" experience, and the immediate, contemporaneous experience of abuse.]

I blithely selected SMILE PRETTY, in total ignorance, on a streaming site, strictly because Scout Taylor-Compton is in it. She is so effective in Rob Zombie's fraught HALLOWEEN remakes that I felt compelled to watch this tacky-looking movie, even though I was turned off by the premise, about a child pornography survivor. ALSO, I just now looked up some information about SMILE PRETTY to prep for this review--I hadn't done so before, because the movie seemed too crude to have been made by anyone I would have heard of--and I was very alarmed to discovered that it was directed by Harry Bromley Davenport, who made all three XTRO movies. Now I'm even more bothered than before...

In SMILE PRETTY, Scout Taylor-Compton plays teenage Nastalia, better known as Nasty, the ongoing victim of a child porn operation run by her uncle, who has been perpetrating and recording her rape for most of her life. A glimmer of hope emerges when she has a chance encounter with Matt, a 20-something white knight who makes a big show of encouraging Nasty to escape her uncle, and rebuffing her ingrained seductive behavior. (played by Peter Chekvala, who looks just like a chav Paul Rudd to me, which should be funny, but it is impossible to experience anything like joy during this movie) Of course, it turns out that Matt actually knows Nasty well from her uncle's widely circulated output, and their meeting was no coincidence. A brief conflict resolves itself in a consummated sexual relationship, after Matt lays out his own sob story: He, too, was molested as a child, so therefore he can't help being a pedophile, and deserves Nasty's sympathy and support. Nasty thinks she has found love with someone who truly understands her, but soon enough, Matt starts using her to bring in younger sexual partners for the two of them--or just for him. Nasty finally becomes disillusioned with Matt when their latest third, 14 year old Samantha (the excellent Shannon Collis), becomes Matt's new primary partner. Realizing that Matt has lost interest because Nasty is approaching adulthood, she finally alerts the authorities and escapes this lifelong cycle of abuse.

As I mentioned, this is what I would ordinarily call "barely a movie". The video quality is crap, so is the sound, and I often found the general manner of filmmaking overly indulgent, as if the director might be telling this cautionary tale as a flimsy excuse for his own interest in young girls. It just seemed to have that grimy, tonally dissonant vibe. However, the performances by both women are roundly superb, and the screenplay by Rachel Calendar has a feeling of authenticity that I found impossible to ignore. The construction of Nasty's character is just too psychiatrically accurate--her sexual forwardness, which she literally cannot control due to her abusive upbringing, her relentless desire to impress and please older men (her partner's arousal is her only source of personal arousal, at whatever cost to herself), her valuation of herself only in terms of her sexual viability--all of these things are vividly articulated, and textbook perfect. The character of Matt is also unnervingly familiar from real life: A narcissistic and manipulative Abuser who wields his own Abused status as a shield, or even a weapon against anyone who rightly accuses him of malice, or tries to stand between him and the greedy indulgence of his slightest whim.

(Artist and survivor Florence Burnier-Bauer in MY TALK WITH FLORENCE)

More disturbing than all of this, is Calendar's unbearably frank discussion of an aspect of child abuse that is seldom addressed: That when an innocent person is induced into a victimizing sexual encounter, they still experience the pleasure that comes from the physical stimulus. Last year, I watched a documentary called MY TALK WITH FLORENCE, in which a victim of lifelong sexual abuse (beginning with her family, and ending with a powerful cult) speaks ferociously about the fallacy of rape as a purely painful experience. Her point is that if we believe that physical evidence of pleasure on the part of the victim means that their assault cannot be defined as rape, then we deprive huge numbers of survivors of their claims. She uses the example of male victims having involuntary, unwanted erections, a biological fact which is used to support the absurd notion that men and boys cannot be raped. Even more to the point, the word I used to describe the confusion of childhood abuse, "innocent", isn't a mandatory ingredient in this noxious emotional brew--even a violent attack will produce a physical reaction. The body can play cruel tricks like this to protect itself from being torn apart from force and friction. I have heard many times the phrase used by Alison Botha in the documentary ALISON, about her brutal rape, disembowelment, and near-decapitation by a pair of strangers: "My body betrayed me." In the case of SMILE PRETTY, there is an unfortunately unforgettable sequence in which Nasty, Samantha and Matt all reminisce about their experiences. They describe their own rapes with an almost gleeful defiance, proclaiming defensively that they each actually enjoyed their dehumanizing sexual initiation at the hands of predatory relatives and babysitters. It is painfully clear that they are trying to justify the shame of their involuntary physical pleasure, by pretending to own it. In the following scene, Samantha listens intently through the wall as Matt and Nasty have sex with more vigor than he has recently managed to summon; all of this detailed reminiscence has thrust the three survivors into a state of hypnotic arousal. Watching this, I was rudely reminded of a conversation I once had with a friend, who suddenly and matter-of-factly recounted an occasion on which an especially shitty college boyfriend raped her, just to conclude an argument. My friend stonily declared, "I didn't give a shit. I was fine." This may not be the same as trying to own the "pleasure" of being assaulted, but it had a similar aspect of trying to own the rape, of trying to reject victimhood by claiming to accept the traumatic event. Though I never forgot it, I try not to think about it. SMILE PRETTY made this impossible.

(Alison Botha in the strange and shattering documentary ALISON)

And here I am, days later, still thinking about this movie I may wish I had never seen. I'm not sure what I got out of it. I'm not sure what anyone would get out of it, who does not know intuitively or factually about these intimate realities of sexual abuse. I rarely feel that I would rather not have seen a movie--my usual philosophy is that as long as an experience moved you in some way, even a displeasurable way, then it was somehow worth the undertaking. In the case of SMILE PRETTY, my resolve may have been tested, and failed. The jury is still out.

#tw: abuse #tw: rape #tw: csa #tw: child abuse #tw: everything #smile pretty #harry bromley davenport #blogtober #Scout Taylor-Compton #shannon collis #my talk with florence #Florence Burnier-Bauer #alison botha #survivor #documentary #drama #rachel calendar

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vannminner · 5 years

Text

Two Hundred and Twenty-One Thoughts I Had During The Avengers: Endgame

(Ordering.. loosely based on memory. Spoilers DEFINITELY included, as well as some serious profanity)

Aw fuck. Yeah, Hawkeye- is he dead? Shit, well his family is now. That's sad..

TONY'S TEACHING NEBULA HOW TO PLAY A GAME. That's good. Thanos was a really shitty father who only ripped her apart and taught her how to enslave and murder mass populations. Bitch deserves a childhood. Ha! And she's competitive... Go figure.

I know Tony's going to die, but shit, really? They're going to do this is the first ten minutes?!

Aw, Tony's dead! Fuck! Wait- what's that!? Oh, that's the Marvel chick! Crap, I knew I should have watched that fucking movie first...

Groot and Neb's hand holding.. my god... so THIS is how this movie is going to go...

Well, Tony's still a prick. Space didn't change him. Didn't we see this tantrum in Civil War? Or was that Iron Man II? ...wait, now that I think about it, boy whines A LOT.

I feel bad harping on Tony. He totally has to die to save the planet- circa: “I shouldn’t be alive, unless it was for a reason, I know what I have to do, and I know it is right.” He's my favorite character and he was alone for, like, five years. Tony deserves more respect.

THANOS IS DEAD. Yeah.. this makes sense... what's the rest of the fucking movie about?

Five year time jump, really? REALLY? You should have made us wait longer for this movie, then.

What even are The Avengers doing? Oh, okay bye, Captain Marvel. We didn't need you anyway...

HOLY FUCK ANT MAN!? DUDE! Where did you come from? OH OH! Your kid's alive!? That's super cool. But dammit, yeah, get your ass back to headquarters. You've got shit to erase!

Oh... and you know how? Okay cool...That's a good save on your irrelevant Avengers plot line.

TONY HAS A KID!? HOLY FUCK! NOOO TONY AND PEPPER MAN MY FUCKING HEART IS BLEEDING!

You want Tony to what now?! But his kid! SHIT. This is, like, not good. He's going to erase his kid with this shotty time travel idea. FUCCCKKKKK....

Or not... I get it Tony, but I don't believe you. See you in a few days.

I love you three thousand. ughhhh just kill me.

Haha... Hulk. What the fuck are you?! This, this REALLY? This is the best of both worlds... okay... okay... settle down Hannah Montana. OH! And you're, like, some weird-ass celebrity now? Cool.

Did we really just watch a two minute scene about NOT taking a picture with Ant Man? No one likes Ant Man. Sorry not sorry Paul Rudd.

Haha- Little Paul Rudd... Haha- Old Paul Rudd... Okay, really? This has gone on too long. Ha- and he pissed himself... cool.

TONY HERE TO SAVE THE WORLD BECAUSE HE'S THE ONE TRUE GENIUS. FUCK YES BITCH.

See, told you we'd see him in a few days.

Hawkeye is, like, a hitman now? Makes sense...

THOR IS FAT. OMG THOR IS FAT. A DRUNK TOO, BUT OMG THOR IS FAT.

Fiancé in my ear: "They got a lot of shit for this apparently... fat shaming"

OMG THIS IS HILARIOUS THOR IS A FAT DRUNK WHO PLAYS VIDEO GAMES ALL DAY. IT ME!??? HAHA Comedic relief while everyone is trying to figure out time-travel and quantum whatever. Haha, Thor, you've finally after ten years redeemed yourself for me.

Yeah, time travel practice-run with the depressed guy. AW HAWKEYE'S KID.. oh..and he's back.. yeah.. this wasn't painful for NO FUCKING REASON.

Okay, let's do this. I am tired of waiting... go go go go go. GO TO THE PAST.

Wait, where the fuck is everyone going again?

Oh, New York, cool cool, OH SHIT WAIT... Like, THIS New York. FUCK MAN. WE ARE REALLY BRINGING IT BACK.

Hahahaha Hulk smash.. kinda.. ugh.. man, level-headed Hulk is, like "I'm trying man. He won't come out!"- all over again. FUCK THIS IS FUNNY.

Wait, okay, Captain and Tony going to the- OH SHIT LOKI, okay, I remember now.. man I should have fucking rewatched all these movies. My ADD IS KILLING me right now.

We're not close to three hours yet, are we?? ARE WE?? *checks clock* okay, good, good, proceed...

Okay, Asgard, got it, got it... HAHAHA Fat-Thor, this will never get old, and Rocket.. this should be interesting...

Settle down, Thor.. Jesus, how the mighty have fallen....

Wait Nebula, who else knows the stone is here!? WHAT'S GOING ON. DON'T BE OMINOUS, BITCH. OUT WITH IT.

It's Thanos. It's definitely Thanos.

Ohhh OMG GUARDIANS YES. YOU DANCE, STARLORD. YOU DANCE. ... wait... he looks insane dancing to no music. THIS IS GOLD, MY FRIENDS, PURE FUCKING GOLD.

OH FUCK NO. Black Widow and Hawkeye are going there?! Shit.. I know what this means. Wait.. I KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS! NOOOOOOO NATASHA AND HAWKEYE.

Hulk's just over here talking to Tilda, whatever her name is, like, wanna grab a cup of coffee and chit-chat a while?! BITCH, THIS IS YOUR FAULT. GIVE HIM THE DAMN STON- oh shit, now he is out of his body. PLOT TWIST. PUT HIM BACK YOU MONSTER! WE ARE ALREADY OPERATING AT HALF CAPACITY HERE!

Okay, New York. Got this... Wait, which one is which? I can tell which Iron Man, is which... because well, Tony has issues with LEAVING SHIT ALONE.

Hahaha Hulk and the stairs.

America's ass? Really..

I'm pretty sure Scar Jo has America's ass.

Okay, Loki, yup, okay.. and sweet talking Captain. We got this.

HAIL HYDRA. I AM DEAD.

I kinda forgot Antman was here... OH GROSS GET OUT OF TONY! What the fuck are you doing in there!

IF Tony dies in the past? What happens in the future... THIS SHIT IS SO CONFUSING. I HATE TIME TRAVEL.

Past Tony is dead?

Is this part of the plan?

Oh, sorry, jumped the gun... He's okay.

HAHA THOR HAMMERING TONY'S HEART!

HAHAHA HULK AND THE STAIRS!

Loki, what are yo- FUCKING LOKI. Wait, what? FUCK. COME BACK. WHY DO YOU ALWAYS FUCK EVERYTHING UP YOU SPINELESS, DEMONIC, SPACE-MAN, YOU?!

FUCK IT WAS THANOS. BITCH TURN OFF YOUR BRAIN. NEBULA YOU GOOD FOR NOTHING- wait, what is happening?!

Okay, we got two stones, right? RHODES HAS THAT STONE, RIGHT?

YES BITCH! NEBULA BETRAYED YOU. YOU'RE LITERALLY THE WORST PERSON (person?) EVER, THANOS. FUCKING DAMMIT.

Wait, we're going where now? I am confused. WHAT THE FUCK IS IN JERSEY. THERE'S NOTHING IN JERSEY! I CAN SAY THIS SHIT BECAUSE I AM FROM CONNECTICUT AND DRIVING THROUGH JERSEY IS THE WORST PART OF ANY SOUTHERN DIRECTED DRIVE!

OH... Jersey... ohhhhhh... okay.

Is that?! OMG IS THAT HOWARD STARK?!

Your name is Howard? Really, Tony.. really? ...Howard...Potts...

WOW I DIDN'T KNOW HOW MUCH I WANTED THIS, BUT NOW IT'S HAPPENING AND OMG. HUG OR SOMETHING! THAT IS YOUR FATHER TONY! UGH. I am already too emotional for this..

Wait, how long has this movie been on so far? Don't check, don't check, don't check....

Thor literally has the bloody easiest job. Like hug your mom, sneak a peek at Nat. Port, and take the stone? What did they need Rocket for?! He should be with Nebula, WHERE HE WOULD BE FUCKING USEFUL!

Hulk's still just talking to Tilda, what's her name. YES BITCH DOCTOR STRANGE WAS A DOUCE. NOW GIVE HIM THE DAMN ST- okay, thank you. Job well done, Tilda. See you, probably never again...

Nebula vs. Nebula?! Bitch was such a suck up. This is ridiculous. Is this really Canon?!

Okay yeah, appease your demented father. NEW-NEBULA! SPIT IT THE FUCK OUT. "THANOS KILLS YOU GAMORA! HE LITERALLY THROWS YOU OFF A-"

NO NO THE CLIFF.

FUCK ME. Who is this.. okay.. Hawkeye has kids, but Black Widow is a female. What is going to... wait, what are they even talking about? Has someone made a decision yet? WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT. STOP TALKING IN CIRCLES BOTH OF YOU. ONLY ONE HAS TO DIE. BE SMART ABOUT THIS. IF YOU BOTH GO DOW-

-Oh no Hawkeye-

-Oh no Black Widow

Wait..

...now I'm...

No.. okay, Black Widow... That's sad...

What a waste of a really good butt.

PEGGY CARTER. FUCK MY FUCKING HEART MAN.

Are we good to go yet? We got the stones, and some more magic potion... I kinda forgot we needed that, but that's good... that's good...

STARK HUGS! FTFW.

We're home!

Guys, that's not Nebula! THAT'S NOT FUCKING NEBULA. Okay, we're just going to ignore the fact that her arms are different and-

Yes guys, it's sad, Black Widow is dead... I'm sad too, but GUYS, COME THE FUCK ON. WE'VE GOT SHIT TO DO! STONE, SNAP, BRING BACK, TAKE OUT NEBULA BECAUSE SHE'S A BITCH!

Hulk is made for this. Really? Really guys? Because that looks like it belongs to Tony's suit. ARE WE REALLY IGNORING-

OH... oh shit... it's fine guys, the hand grows.

OH FUCK HE SNAPPED.

DID IT WORK?! DID IT WORK?!

DID IT FUCKING-

ANSWER THE PHONE!!!!

ANSWER THE FUCKING PHONE! WHO IS FUCKING CALL-

OMG! HIS WIFE! HAWKEYE! AHHH. IT WORKED! WAIT- WHAT THE-

Wait.

What is?

OMG WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT THING?

OMG WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING.

FUCKING- WHAT?!

Thanos. FUCKING, Thanos.

Shit, where's the hand?! WHERE ARE THE FUCKING STONES.

Wait who has them?

Where is everyone?!

OMG THEY'RE DROWNING!

I can't even remember who is here right now..

Is everyone alive?

Where are the other avengers? WHAT IS- Nebula, seriously, go home. You're ruining this. APPEASE DADDY YOU BITCH.

Sure, cool... Thanos why don't you just pop your happy ass down on that rock. Take a fucking load off. Have a good rest... because... IF YOU'VE FORGOTTEN, YOU HAVEN'T EVEN DONE ANYTHING IN THIS TIMELINE YET, YOU LAZY PIECE OF-

Wait, that's actually kinda badass.

You're just sitting there hanging out and-

OH GOD WHAT ARE THOSE THINGS?! FUCKING MUTANT GIANT ALIEN BUGS!

RUN HAWKEYE RUN!

THEY'RE STILL DROWNING! GODDAMN, DO SOMETHING USEFUL FOR ONCE, ANTMAN, INSTEAD OF THROWING OUT THEORIES THAT YOU CAN'T EVEN HELP EXECUTE! HURRY, FUCKER, HURRY!

Thanos vs. Iron Man, Captain America, and Thor. Okay, I don't understand how this isn't over in, like, two seconds...

Seriously, what makes this Thanos guy so badass?

Like what is his secret?

Maybe it's Maybelline?

Fucking Thanos...

SHIT WE ALL GUNNA DIE!

TONY! IS THIS... is this it? Are we-

Are we dead now?

That's right, Gamora. Help your fucking SISTER!

Did Nebula just commit suicide?

That's awkward...

Seriously, is no one going to say how painfully awkward that was to watch?

NOO TONY!

NOO CAP-!

HOLY SHIT WE ARE SO OUT NUMBERED! FUCKING THANOS.

WHAT IS-

Oh...my god.

OH MY GOD!

THEY'RE HERE! THEY'RE FUCKING HERE!

OH MY GOOD, ALL THAT IS HOLY, GOD!!

Is that, IT IS! STARLORD!

BLACK PANTHER!

GROOT! HOLY SHIT, YOU GIANT TREE, YOU. I LOVE YOU SO FUCKING MUCH!

Wait, where is- SPIDERMAN! YASSS YOU, WEB-SWINGING, LITTLE BASTARD, YOU. I TOTALLY HATED YOU BEFORE YOU DIED AND I REGRET THAT NOW. IM SO FUCKING SORRY.

IS THAT PEPPER-FUCKING-STARK, MAN!?

GIANT-ASS ANT-MAN. I take back whatever I said about you before. SQUISH THANOS’ ARMY LIKE THE TINY SPINELESS BUGS THAT THEY ARE!

Is that... insensitive?

Seriously, how are you guys still losing?! WHAT IS THANOS!? FUCKING GOD. THAT'S WHAT- HOW ARE YOU ALL SO USELESS RIGHT NOW?!

SPIDERMAN AND IRON MAN!

DOCTOR STANGE DID THE SPARKELY CIRCLE. Omg, I am dead.

THIS IS NICE! HUGS. Holy fuck. MY FUCKING HEART.

GAMORA! But wait, Q, that's not...

OUCH! FUCKING NUT-KICK ON POINT.

HAHAHAHA- yes, Gamora, that's the one... HAHAHA

Yeah, Doctor Strange is a prick Tony, we know this. WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN YOU CAN'T TELL US? I swear to fucking god I'm coming for you Cumberbatch if this doesn't fucking work-

HOW ARE WE STILL LOSING?! YOU HAVE THE FULL-SPAN OF THE AVENGERS, AND A FUCKING BADASS WAKANDA ARMY, AND YOU ARE STILL LOSING.

This is like one badass game of keep-away.

Seriously, though... of all the games we learned as kids, THIS is the one we're going with?

HOW ABOUT HIDE THE FUCKING HAND SOMEWHERE ELSE FAR FUCKING AWAY FROM THANOS.

OH SHIT SPACESHIP FIRE!!!

OH SHIT WATER!!!!

Water? Really?

STRANGE, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! What is that thing!? Now, use it! PUSH IT! Dammit, okay, cool, just stand there holding a giant ass water weapon that you could be throwing at Thanos' giant-ass head!

Are we all dead yet?

How long has this movie been on for?

Don't fucking look, MEGHAN.

GROOT AND ROCKET- OH MY FUCKING GOD.

WHAT IS THE SPACE SHIP SHOOTING AT!? WHAT THE-

FUCKING C. MARVEL. REALLY. DAMN, YOU FIERCE BITCH!

Oh, oh, look at you, girl! Go girl, go! You put down that blue-faced mongrel.

FEMALE MONTAGE. FUCKING FUCK, HOLY HELL, FUCKING A.

SHIT! OH DAMN... Those stones... how did I forget about the stones again. FUCKING! DON'T LET HIM PUT IT ON!!!

Seriously, we are fixing a car right now?? Is this really important?? I feel like this can wait until after Thanos is dead.

Someone call DCF... what the fuck did Thanos just do to Spiderman?

DAMMIT! HE PUT IT ON.

GET IT OFF HIM CM! DON'T LET HIM-

Oh jeez, he made CM look like a ragdoll.Oh... more ragdolls...

WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING. WHY CAN'T I KEEP UP WITH THIS BULL-SHIT.

WHO IS DEAD? IS ANYONE DEAD? WHAT THE FUCK?!

SHIT THE GLOVE IS ON AGAIN!

How did we not learn the first time, NOT to let that happen.

WAIT! GO TONY GO TONY GO!

NOOO TONY NOOO TONY NO.

Wait, I'm pretty sure I saw those stones fall off...

HE SNAPPED.

Deep breath... nothing.. ha.. Thanos you little grumpy bitch.

Stones-

TONY HAS THE STONES!

BITCH, YOU KNEW THIS WAS GOING TO HAPPEN!

YOU'RE TELLING ME YOU JUST HAD FUCKING HOLES READY FOR FIVE INFINITY STONES SET INTO YOUR FUCKING IRON MAN ARMOR THE WHOLE ENTIRE TIME!? WHAT THE-

Yes baby, YOU are Iron Man.

SIT THE FUCK DOWN THANOS.

YOU BLOW AWAY IN THE WIND, BITCH.

BLOW

BYE BITCH, BYE!

No... Tony....

Peter fucking Parker.. no.

God no, what the fuck. I didn't need this.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Stark"- just... fucking kill me.

SOMEONE CALL PEPPER! HER HUSBAND IS-

Oh, hi Pepper...

Jesus Christ.

WERE GOING TO BE OKAY. REST NOW, TONY! OMG. Seriously, just kill me. OMG ... WHAT THE FUCK.

FUCKING EMOTIONS.

Wait, did we win? I forgot to pay attention.

Has anyone seen Groot in a minute? How is my giant fucking ficus doing?

HOW LONG HAS THIS MOVIE BEEN ON?

Do we have to watch them put the stones back? I really hope not. I cannot take anymore stress tonight.

I LOVE YOU THREE THOUSAND.

FUCK ME.

TONY HAS A HEART... and mine is having palpitations.

OMG EVERYONE'S HERE! WE CELEBRATE YOU, TONY STARK.

IS THAT- OH GOD, ALL THAT IS HOLY. IT IS! HARLEY OMG!

WE'RE CONNECTED.

YOUR DAD IS A PUSSY, BUT WE ARE CONNECTED.

God, this fucking hurts.

Happy and MORGAN. What the fuck.

CHEESEBURGERS?! YOU WANT FUCKING CHEESEBURGERS?! OF COURSE YOU FUCKING DO.

As if my emotions weren't compromised enough already...

Thor giving his throne up to a badass- FUCK YEAH HE IS.

Fucking really, Wanda and Hawkeye. Shit. I give up. I'm just going to sit here now....

I DON'T CARE ABOUT YOU CAPTAIN AMERICA. JUST PUT THE STONES BACK SO I CAN LEAVE THIS GODDAM THEATRE AND DROWN MYSELF IN WINE.

Oh... you're old now, Captain...

This makes sense.

Wait, does this make sense?

Weren't you like frozen or something? Did that just not happen? I fucking hate time travel.

Oh, and you married Peggy.

Is that really the end? Seriously. WHAT.

OMG... THIS CREDIT MONTAGE. WHAT THE-

OH IT CHANGED.

HOLY FUCK. GOODBYE TO THE FIRST GENERATION! I AM CRYING.

NATASHA. SCAR JO.. OMG. I LOVE YOU.

TONY.

Fucking Robert Downey Jr, I love you man. Thank you for 12 brilliant years. FUCK. I need a nap.

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jazzypizzaz · 5 years

Text

endgame spoilers

overall I liked it! it was a fun event and (mostly) a fitting, definitive end to the original phase of Avengers. it’s one of those finales that plays enough fanservice and callbacks to be satisfying, but also does everything it needs to do to tie up narrative arcs with some twists along the way. like, it’s not a movie I’d rewatch a bunch, but I’m glad it played out how it did for the most part

with the exception of NATASHA!!! listen, literally any of the characters would do the heroic self-sacrifice to save everyone, and the narrative could justify it as a fitting end for their arc. whatever it takes and all that... but Natasha, unlike Tony -- had only the Avengers as her family and nothing else to live for apparently, had red in her ledger and did it to repay a debt, couldn’t have kids (*deep sigh*) and decided that made Clint’s life more worthwhile....... and you know what FUCK all of that. no fucking way does any of that mean that she’s better off dead and none of those are good enough reasons for her end. what the FUCK

that said, (and yes I’m immediately contradicting myself) the only things I really wanted from this movie was a satisfying reason for Tony and Steve to never reappear in future movies (and you know that retiring happily into the sunset while still relatively young could never secure that) -- preferably with Tony to be the one to make the self-sacrifice hero play and for Steve to have a happy quiet life somehow.

idk it’s a superhero movie. someone’s gotta do the big climatic hero move, and the entire arc has been building for Tony to do that. and it wasn’t a cool-headed either/or choice, it wasn’t deliberately walking into death -- it was a split second decision in the heat of battle. maybe that makes it different. also, the greater narrative weight put on it

also maybe, as much as he’s a great character, I’m just tired of him. (oops)

& Steve, sure he could live a happy life rebuilding the world and chilling with his buds, but like... since the ice he’s always been a man out of time yearning for what could have been in his past (while always meeting the challenges of the day of course), he’s always felt misplaced and alone, and... I don’t begrudge him choosing to live a happy life and get that dance he promised Peggy.

maybe it’s that tony deserves to be immemorialized as the ultimate hero that he is; & steve deserves some goddamn rest??

that said what the FUCKING FUCK is up with the time travel mechanics???

cuz you know that Steve “never followed a rule in his goddamn life if it didn’t suit him” Rogers wouldn’t live in obscurity not changing the timeline through: Hydra’s infiltration, Bucky’s brainwashing, more wars, the civil rights movement, every single social event in history, etc etc etc. so like?? okay maybe changing the past makes it into a different timeline but then how did he wait for them on the bench as if his timeline connected to theirs ???

did ANY of their actions change the past of the current timeline?? like I think the answer is no it’s impossible, but then how do you explain Steve???

also who thought letting Steve be the one to return the stones was a good idea. who gave Steve unbridled access to the past and thought he wouldn’t just fucking live there. Bucky knew he would, I’m sure of it. Natasha would have known (*shakes fist*). Sam seems like he should have, I mean seriously?? it’s on Steve’s character sheet; he doesn’t do well with moving on.

HELL YEAH to captain america bird man Sam though. fuck yeah I’m here for it

okay other characters...

Ant Man was a breath of fresh air in the first part. the perfect character to reappear into this dark timeline, give new hope, and react to all the weird space shit (I DIED at the taco scene, probably when I laughed the most). I didn’t think I cared about him, but I was really touched by the Cassie scenes.

my favorite Rocket moment was him petting Paul Rudd’s head like a puppy. yes please. also, snapping some sense into Thor. he had a bit part as expected, but it was good.

Hawkeye... stop trying to make Hawkeye happen. I just.... don’t care. and I could not stop sniggering at his hair long enough to feel sad about anything.

yes all the treatment of Thor’s weight gain and alcoholism was fucked up, played for cheap laughs, not all that funny. but also like -- they’re clearly shown as manifestations of his corrosive guilt and trauma and self-harm, and by the end, he becomes the brave hero again without any sort of getting-into-shape losing weight montage scene. it’s his perception of himself not his physicality. plus like, he’s the Goofy Avenger tbh and idk if there was a serious way to show him at a lower emotional low point than Infinity War without getting too dark for his brand(tm). low standards on my part maybe? but whatever, he didn’t die.

Valkyrie HELL YEAH... I was so giddy about her flying around on the Pegasus. where did she even get it??? I don’t care it was amazing. all hail Valkyrie, King of Asgard.

actually??? wait. fuck that. Thor needs to accept responsibility and live up to being king of his people. Valkyrie needs to go on kooky space adventures and find herself. seriously!!

good for Bruce on the hulk integration thing, but I missed watching Mark Ruffalo’s human non-CGI face

Nebula, baby girl, you’ve come so far ;_; sorry you didn’t get put on airplane mode for the time travel, whooops.

the 100% best part of the movie for me, the only point at which I got chills, was (of course) Sam chiming in over Cap’s earpiece on your left and flying out of the wizard hole in a glowing swoop of glory. beautiful majestic bird man.

(and then the armies piling through after & Wakanda. yes.)

Wanda reappeared and I admit I totally forgot about her until that point. and then I realized I also totally forgot about Vision until the end when she was talking to Hawkeye by the river jklsdfjkl. okay then

Carol just decided that she likes space more than Earth I guess? sure whatever. great haircut though

also... New Asgard is in Norway, presumably, but it’s a sovereign kingdom??? what did they do when the Norwegian government stopped by?? paid for the land and said “look we’ve been through a lot so just let us fish and drink beer in peace. also, we’re the people from your myths and have inhuman stamina/strength/science so what, feasibly, are you gonna do about it anyway” I just want to see that conversation.

oh another thing. I wanted some resolution or cathartic followup to the themes in Infinity War -- killing the one to save many, trading lives, etc. which. this really didn’t do at all. there wasn’t a consistent theme in the same way? idk I’ll have to think about it more, but for that reason alone IW is a much better movie imo

really excited about (As)guardians of the Galaxy, vol 3, Search for Gamora. Rocket is going to be unbearable in the best way.

#rambling ahoy #mcu #avengers endgame #spoilers

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surveysonfleek · 5 years

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1243.

How old were you the year your favorite movie came out? i think i was about 14.

Whose birthday is coming up soon? hmm probably my sister’s.

What’s your favorite place to get sushi? sushi hub!!!

What’s your favorite Paul Rudd movie? 40yo virgin.

Have you ever been involved in Direct Sales Marketing and if so, what company? nope.

Do you know anyone who lives in Hawaii? not personally.

When was the last time you applied lotion? today.

What’s your favorite way to eat a potato, ex.: chips, fries, baked, etc.? i honestly like them all.

Do you delete people from Facebook if their views are vastly different than yours? i haven’t had to do that before. i generally only keep my facebook friends down to people i’d say hi to in real life.

Are you planning on having kids? Does that question annoy you to no end? eventually. definitely not ready for it now.

Have you eaten your favorite food in the past seven days? yes.

What was the last phone conversation you had about? a job.

Do you have a Snapchat and do you just add things to your story or do you send snaps to individual people? i have snapchat but i’m over it. i just use it to post stuff to my story from time to time.

What’s the closest thing to you with someone’s handwriting on it? a journal.

What’s your favorite thing to put on bagels? cream cheese and smoked salmon yum.

What’s the most important key on your key ring? my car and house keys.

Do you have Spotify and if so, what’s the last song you listened to on it? i have spotify but i totally forgot. i use apple music more.

What was the last argument you got in about and who was it with? i forgot.

How many social media outlets do you have and which ones? facebook, instagram, linked, snapchat, twitter. i think that’s it.

At what age did you start picking out your own outfits? i forgot lol.

Have you ever been to a Rocky Horror Picture Show Shadowcast where people act out the movie while it’s playing and the audience yells things callbacks? nope.

How spicy do you like your food? i can’t tolerate spice at all. so mild i guess.

Do you have a scented-wax warmer? nope.

Who’s your favorite director? i don’t have one.

When was the last time you walked through your front door? about 30 mins ago.

What would you do if you accidentally got pregnant? freak out.

Bats: cute or gross? gross.

Are you going to or did you see the new Star Wars? nope.

What’s your favorite Netflix show? hmm. i have a ton of faves but i think i’ll go with oitnb.

What was the last really intense pain you felt? a cramp.

#survey #surveys #quiz #bored #questions

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bthenoise · 4 years

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Here’s The Best of 2019 As Picked By Members Of The Used, Periphery, Counterparts, Killswitch Engage, Grayscale & More

Well everyone, we did it. Somehow someway we all survived yet another 365 gloriously trying days on this place we call earth. In about two more weeks, we will officially begin a brand new decade with hopes of starting something beautiful and life-changing for the human race. Until then, we’d like to take a second to look back on some of the finer things that came out of 2019 – you know, like the best album, best song, best movie, etc.

Like we’ve done in years past, we’ve completely turned our year-end best-of list over to the artists we cover on a daily basis because let’s face it, their opinions are the ones we all really care about, right?

Right.

To check out what bands like The Used, Counterparts, Periphery, Killswitch Engage, Fit For A King, Grayscale, Atreyu, Wage War, Boston Manor and more have all been obsessing over for the past year or so, be sure to see below. We hope you enjoy this final list as much as we do and wish you all the most peaceful and positive holiday season ever.

Enjoy!

Jeph Howard and Dan Whitesides - The Used

JEPH HOWARD

Best Album of 2019: Sampa the Great - The Return And Knocked Loose - A Different Shade Of Blue

Best Song of 2019: “Blow Me” - from The Used and yes I’m biased.

Best Music Video of 2019: Wendall - “The Power of Wings”

Most Underrated Album of 2019: Sampa the Great - The Return. Her vibe reminds me of my favorite era of hip hop.

Best Movie of 2019: Dr. Sleep, great book too. Must have been tough rewriting the story just enough to mix both the book The Shining and the film adaptation Kubrick made and then making a movie based on both origins.

Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: The OA season 3. So unfair that never happened.

Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Epstein was an inside job and also the cat playing the cell phone ring tone 😂

Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: HodgePodge Superfest 2019 Indonesia, mostly because I got to hang with a couple family friends I haven’t seen in years.

2020 New Year's Resolution: For 2020 I want to worry less about things I have no control over.

DAN WHITESIDES

Best Album: The Knocked Loose album A Different Shade Of Blue is great and so fuckin heavy! On the other side of things, the Billie Eilish album is really good front to back. Saw her live in Salt Lake and it was pretty sick.

Best Song: Honestly, it’s “Blow Me” by my band The Used. I’m not just saying that because it’s my band. It’s a great fucking song and it has all of my favorite elements in it.

Best Music Video: Blink 182’s “Darkside.” Love the stick tricks and the dancing kids.

Most Underrated Album: All the albums I liked in 2019, I rated them pretty high.

Best Movie: Dumb and Dumber has been the best movie every year since it came out. All the kids movies that came out in 2019 were good. I see them all. I didn’t really like The Addams Family though.

Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: Atypical and Fuller House and I’m not fucking with you. I laugh out loud at Fernando every time!

Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): When the deaf baby hears for the first time. I almost cried but I couldn’t because I’m a man and men don’t cry. Just playin! I did tear up a weeee bit.

Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: Saw Rob Zombie and damn he puts on a great show. Back To The Beach was my favorite show I played in 2019. We did a cover of Linkin Park’s “Shadow Of The Day” at that show and it started raining. People were crying. It was nuts!

2020 New Year's Resolution: I don’t really do resolutions but I wish people could just get along despite their beliefs. Life is too short.

Misha Mansoor - Periphery

Best Album of 2019: Mordial by Carbomb Best Song of 2019: “F it Up” by Louis Cole Best Music Video of 2019: “Genesis” by Devin Townsend Most Underrated Album of 2019: Forever, A Fast Life by Infinity Shred Best Movie of 2019: Jojo Rabbit Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: Barry Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Gamer Girl Bath Water Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: Attended - Deadmau5 Cube V3. Played - Sold Out London headliner at O2 Kentish Town 2020 New Year's Resolution: Drive more cars

Brendan Murphy - Counterparts

Best Album of 2019: Better Off - Reap What You Sow. Luke is probably the best songwriter I know personally. The album is an absolute fucking hit. I literally begged him to send me the masters before the album came out and I’ve listened to it non-stop since. Was hard to keep that album a secret.

Best Song of 2019: Gotta go with what my Spotify wrapped tells me and aside from the 1975’s discography, my most listened to song of 2019 was “Slingshot” by Better Off. The song is amazing, the lyrics rock, chorus is fucking huge. Like I said, Luke can’t write a bad song.

Best Music Video of 2019: I’ll be honest, it’s rare for me to watch any music video that doesn’t have the 1975 in it so I’m gonna go ahead and pick their video for “Frail State of Mind” because... I mean look at him, he’s so cool. If we could get away with making videos like that I might actually not dread shooting them haha.

Most Underrated Album of 2019: BETTER OFF, YET AGAIN. ARE YOU SURPRISED? I don’t understand how they aren’t the biggest band on earth.

Best Movie of 2019: Midsommar. I’m a total A24/Ari Aster fanboy and I love movies about freaky cults and this movie ticks all the boxes. It’s not as much of a “deep dive” as Hereditary, very surface level, but I mean it’s creepy and it’s shot beautifully and there’s flowers everywhere and in case you forgot I sing for Counterparts so it’s right up my fuckin alley haha.

Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: Barry without question. Blake made me watch an episode when we were recording NLTL and I binged watched the show so hard I’d be up all night watching when I was supposed to be writing lyrics. Last time I was physically unable to stop watching a show was Lost, so that should say something.

Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): My own twitter hun xox 😘

Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: I mean it’s hard to remember our shows because not only are they all fun, I’ve usually had a few chardonnays by the time we go on stage BUT one that stands out is the last day of Private Room 2.0 in Worcester... simply because for all of “Love Me” I didn’t have to say a fucking word, the crowd did the whole damn thing. I think there’s a video where I get so stoked I start screaming “YOU’RE GOD DAMN RIGHT” and jumping. It’s fun and honestly, it’s 10 fucking words don’t make me do it by myself.

2020 New Year's Resolution: Stop accidentally calling my teacher “mom.”

Mike D'Antonio - Killswitch Engage

Best Album of 2019: He Is Legend - White Bat Best Song of 2019: He Is Legend - “Resister Resist Her” Best Music Video of 2019: Death Ray Vision “Just Let It Die” Most Underrated Album of 2019: He Is Legend - White Bat Best Movie of 2019: Joker Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: The Mandalorian Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Yoda/Toyota meme Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: Field Day played in Connecticut a few months back. 2020 New Year's Resolution: Refuse the new world order

Porter McKnight - Atreyu

Best Album of 2019: Angel Du$t - Pretty Buff Best Song of 2019: “The Dead Don’t Die” - Sturgill Simpson Best Music Video of 2019: Rammstein - “Deutschland” Most Underrated Album of 2019: The Act - The Devil Wears Prada Best Movie of 2019: Midsommar Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: Watchmen Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Paul Rudd “Look at us” on Hot Ones Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: Attended - Nothing More - New Orleans March 2019 Played - Mr’s Smalls Theatre - Millvale, PA 2020 New Year's Resolution: Establish a consistent physical art practice

Ryan Kirby - Fit For A King

Best Album of 2019: Just for the purpose of nostalgia, I am going to go with Shaped by Fire by As I Lay Dying. It doesn't re-invent the wheel but it's just some good ole metalcore that brings me back.

Best Song of 2019: I absolutely cannot stop listening to "Masochist" by Polaris. This band is going to be huge!

Best Music Video of 2019: I feel like I have to say our own video for "When Everything Means Nothing" is the best strictly because we all almost died of hypothermia while getting sprayed by a fire hose.

Most Underrated Album of 2019: I think The Valley by Whitechapel doesn't get talked about near as much as it should. Phil's cleans are fantastic and they keep bringing the heavy.

Best Movie of 2019: I feel like this will be a lot of people's favorite movie but The Joker was an absolute masterpiece.

Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: This one is EASILY The Boys. It might be the most well-done superhero show OR movie ever made. Once you watch the first episode, you are sucked in.

Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): This one is really tough because at this point, I don't even know which meme is from what year. I guess I'll go with Baby Yoda since I know that’s 2019 but with a disclaimer: There are a lot of NOT funny Baby Yoda memes out there.

Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: The show in Cologne, Germany with As I Lay Dying was the biggest club show we had ever played, and at the same time, probably one of the best live performances I've ever seen. Amazing night.

2020 New Year's Resolution: I want to be able to run a half marathon with my dad. It’s pretty simple but he is out here running full marathons all the time and is double my age. I feel like I need to step it up.

Valentino Arteaga - Of Mice & Men

Best Album of 2019: Gideon - Out Of Control Best Song of 2019: Kublai Khan TX - “Self Destruct” Best Music Video of 2019: Ghostemane - “Bonesaw” Most Underrated Album of 2019: Ithaca - The Language of Injury Best Movie of 2019: Yesterday Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: Cold Case Files Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Spotify Wrapped 2019 Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: Wacken Open Air Festival 2020 New Year's Resolution: Eat less meat & make more music

Matty Mullins - Memphis May Fire

Best Album of 2019: Dermot Kennedy - Without Fear Best Song of 2019: Papa Roach - “Feel Like Home” Best Music Video of 2019: Asking Alexandria - “The Violence” Most Underrated Album of 2019: He Is Legend - White Bat Best Movie of 2019: Yesterday Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: This Is Us Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): @catatonicyouths IG Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: Warped Tour in Atlantic City was LEGENDARY! 2020 New Year's Resolution: Write the best MMF record of our career

Nick Ventimiglia - Grayscale

Best Album of 2019: tryhard by The Band Camino and Fear Inoculum by Tool Best Song of 2019: "No Age" by Rich People Best Music Video of 2019: "Mantra" by Bring Me the Horizon was pretty wild Most Underrated Album of 2019: Third Eye Blind - Screamer Best Movie of 2019: Big fans of Us and The Irishman Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: Peaky Blinders and Mindhunter Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Big fan of the Kawhi Leonard “Hey, hey, hey” memes. Really anything but that lady yelling at that fucking cat. Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: Our headliner in Philly this past October at The TLA. 2020 New Year's Resolution: Rock harder than we did in 2019.

Cody Quistad - Wage War

Best Album of 2019: tryhard by The Band Camino Best Song of 2019: “See Through” by The Band Camino Best Music Video of 2019: “Resentment” by A Day To Remember Most Underrated Album of 2019: In Darkness by Varials Best Movie of 2019: Peanut Butter Falcon The Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: The Office, duh Favorite Internet Moment of 2019: The Epstein memes kill me Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: Can’t Say I Ain’t Country Tour: Florida Georgia Line, Dan + Shay, Morgan Wallen 2020 New Year’s Resolution: Write the best songs I’ve ever written, love on more people, and be healthier

Boston Manor

Best Album of 2019: Death Is A Warm Blanket by Microwave. This record is the best guitar music to come out in years. As our contemporaries, Microwave is constantly challenging and inspiring us to make better art.

Best Song of 2019: “The Brakeman Has Resigned” by Microwave. This song could not be more relevant to us, both instrumentally and lyrically. It’s just fuckin’ perfect.

Best Music Video of 2019: “DIAWB” by Microwave. You get the point.

Most Underrated Album of 2019: Foreign Language EP by Can’t Swim. Always love to see friends changing up their riff game.

Best Movie of 2019: The Irishmen. I’ve watched it like three times in the van now and can’t choose which Tony is my favourite.

Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: Rick and Morty. You son of a bitch, I’m in.

Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Eric Egan from Heart Attack Man.

Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: Best concert we played would have to be Download Madrid. Right off the heels of ADTR in America, the airline lost our gear so we had to cobble together a backline and ended up playing after Tool to an insane amount of people.

2020 New Year's Resolution: Continue our world domination.

Mike Foley - Varials

Best Album of 2019: Feels Like You by Whirr Best Song of 2019: "Nothing Left To Love" by Counterparts Best Music Video of 2019: Tie between "Lips Like Lemonade" by Nick Prosper & "Mistakes Like Fractures" by Knocked Loose. Most Underrated Album of 2019: Deceiver by Diiv Best Movie of 2019: Joker Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: I Think You Should Leave Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Kombucha girl Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: The best show I attended was definitely the Balance & Composure farewell show in NYC. RIP. Best played was definitely the Atlantic City Warped Tour date. Also RIP. 2020 New Year's Resolution: Tour more internationally / spend as much time traveling as possible. Really hoping we make it to 3 different continents this year.

Kory Gregory - Prince Daddy & The Hyena

Best Album of 2019: Remembering The Rockets - Strange Ranger Best Song of 2019: “Mono No Aware” - Great Grandpa Best Music Video of 2019: “Must Be Wrong” - White Reaper Most Underrated Album of 2019: Super Enthusiast - Macseal Best Movie of 2019: Parasite Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: Been really enjoying Mandalorian Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Baby Yoda forever and always. No questions asked. Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: Our record release show in NYC was really special! That’s my favorite one I played. As far as the ones I attended, this Culture Abuse/Tony Molina show I went to in Boston was pretty legendary. 2020 New Year's Resolution: I just wanna keep writing songs that are better than the last!

Yvette Young - Covet

Best Album of 2019: The Japanese House - Good At Falling Best Song of 2019: “Shrugging Match” - Bobbing Best Music Video of 2019: Don Broco - “Action” Most Underrated Album of 2019: Town Portal - Of Violence Best Movie of 2019: Midsommar Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: I Think You Should Leave Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Discovering bandmemes666, Chibson, catatonicyouths and allgasnobrakes on IG Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: Orlando summer headliner show at The Soundbar 2020 New Year's Resolution: Make a dope full-length album

Carter Hardin - Chapel

Best Album of 2019: Album of the year for me is KIN by Electric Guest. Every song is a bop and the production is so clean.

Best Song of 2019: I would have to say “Friends” by CHAPEL. The band is pretty cool and the song is a slapper.

Best Music Video of 2019: “Panini” by Lil Nas X is mine. It’s the most memorable one I’ve seen this year.

Most Underrated Album of 2019: Pep Talks - Judah & The Lion. Not enough people are talking about that record.

Best Movie of 2019: MARRIAGE STORY. This movie broke me & I can’t stop thinking about it.

Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: Fleabag is amazing. you need to watch it.

Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Baby Yoda memes are the best memes in the world.

Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: I saw Cherub recently and they always put on the best show. This recent one was super inspiring.

2020 New Year's Resolution: Release more music

Alex Biro - Selfish Things

Best Album: The Act by The Devil Wears Prada. Genre-defying and innovative, this was one of my favourite albums of the last decade. I’ve been a TDWP fan since Zombie EP but the growth they’ve shown on their latest release while still staying true to their roots was sonically refreshing.

Best Song: “Old Town Road” by Lil Nas X. This speaks for itself. I’ve never been one to shy away from popular music, but it’s Lil Nas X’s “love everyone but fuck everyone” attitude that kind of impresses me most? He’s punk as hell. He breaks stereotypes. He pissed off 90% of the country music industry. I hope he continues to succeed.

Best Music Video: “bury a friend” by Billie Eilish. I mean, it’s been Billie’s year. We all know that. But the whole “monster under your bed” motif coupled with her wanting to not shy away from the dark side of things in a genre filled to the brim with bubblegum songs and visuals speaks to her innovation as a creative and an artist.

Most Underrated Album of 2019: Everyone I’ve Ever Loved by Valleyheart. This came out a week and a half before 2019 but I’m including it here. “Agnosia” is one of the best songs I’ve heard in years. This band is fucking amazing. Don’t sleep on them. They deserve better than they’ve been given.

Best Movie of 2019: Peanut Butter Falcon. Shia LaBeouf is a true artist, and he’s at the peak of his game here. If you’re a fan of Garden State, The Grand Budapest Hotel, The Perks of Being a Wallflower, Rocket Science or any other emotionally devastating indie films, this is a movie for you.

Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: The Simpsons. God bless you Disney+. I can’t even put into words how nice it is to watch all of my old favourites with my daughter. Treehouse of Horror forever.

Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Colton jumping the fence during The Bachelor. We admittedly got snowed in during the “snow cyclone” in Wyoming and binged this whole season. I��ve never been more disappointed. Still impressed by his agility, though.

Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: Atlanta, GA w/ Microwave, Boston Manor and Heart Attack Man. We’ve never had that many kids over the barricade. It was one of those “wow, maybe our band isn’t totally shit” moments. We all got off stage and knew it was one to remember. I’ll never forget it.

2020 New Year's Resolution: Learn to be happy with who I am without letting the toxicity of social media cloud my self-perception.

Ryan Donovan - Red City Radio

Best Album of 2019: Mannequin Pussy - Patience. "Who You Are" & "Drunk II" are some standout tracks on that record for me! It's just filled with melodic anthems that have killer soft harmonies and is kind of a technically ambitious record compared to their older stuff, which I also love!

Best Song of 2019: The Menzingers - "America (You're Freaking Me Out)." They fucking NAILED it with this track and our current climate in the US, socially/politically/economically etc. They seamlessly always write some killer tunes!

Best Music Video of 2019: PUP - "Free At Last." No one had heard the song yet. They posted the lyrics and chord chart to the song and took all submissions of everyone's interpretation of the song and edited that down. You just gotta watch it for yourself, IT FUCKING RULES. Most Underrated Album of 2019: Decent Criminal - BLISS. I love this band and their tunes/sound. Small indy label release and I hope they take some more strides forward and keep growing. They rip.

Best Movie of 2019: Favorite movie I have personally seen so far this year is Once Upon A Time In Hollywood. I heard it was a lot of either "love it" or "hated it" kind of reviews but I personally thought it was a killer film.

Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: Ah man, with so much time on the road touring this year for RCR binge-watching older shows was a lot of my downtime when I got back home so here are some favs: Admittedly I had never seen Breaking Bad, that has now been binged and completed. Game Of Thrones (hadn't seen it until this Summer, I know, I know whatever). Animal Kingdom, Succession, Punisher, Jessica Jones and I Think You Should Leave.

Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): I LOVE THIS MEME and I do love pizza.

Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: Probably the last show of our short tour with Hot Water Music over in Cologne, Germany. It was the largest capacity venue show we have ever played as a band - that wasn't a festival - at 4k humans, sold out! It was also extra special because Rockpalast had a 10+ human camera crew on hand and filmed the whole thing with live edits as it was streamed for anyone to tune in and watch. The edits and camera/audio/streaming quality was A+!!!

2020 New Year's Resolution: Better self-care.

Brett Boland - Astronoid

Best Album of 2019: HEALTH - VOL. 4 :: SLAVES OF FEAR Best Song of 2019: Dinosaur Pile-Up - Thrash Metal Cassette Best Music Video of 2019: Billie Eilish - “bury a friend” Most Underrated Album of 2019: Nightmare Scenario - Beyond What is Real Best Movie of 2019: Midsommar Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: Succession Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Sonic The Hedgehog Movie debacle. Best Concert You Attended: Final Slayer show in MA Best Concert You Played in 2019: Exit 111 2020 New Year's Resolution: PUT OUT MORE MUSIC

Conversation

Best Album of 2019: Copeland - Blushing. I’ve been a huge fan of this band for years and years and years; to say that they shaped my songwriting is an understatement. I was lucky enough to catch Copeland for the first time on this tour and it was a truly tectonic moment for me. Blushing was a perfect step for this band in terms of tone, emotional maturity and instrumental creativity. I was just so happy to hear every single song.

Best Song of 2019: “Make It Better” by Anderson Paak. This track just puts you in a good mood!!

Best Music Video of 2019: Our music video for “You’ve Made Yourself Perfectly Clear” where we accurately and tastefully re-created the opening scene of Wayne’s World to perfection. I know it seems like a bit of a brag to say you had the best video of the year, but truth be told, nothing else even came close.

Best Movie of 2019: Joker - I’m sure this will be a pretty common response but IT WAS INCREDIBLE!!

Most Binge-Worthy Show of 2019: Letterkenny - A hilarious show about small-town Canada. If you don’t know, now you know.

Favorite Internet Moment of 2019 (Viral Video, GIF, Meme, etc.): Jonathan Frakes Asking Questions.

Best Concert You Attended/Played in 2019: A close tie between Arkells at Scotiabank Arena and Barr Brothers at Mod Club

2020 New Year's Resolution: To tour all of the USA and Europe for our new record. We are all so excited for the new music that we’re about to put out into the world and our undying dream is to show our live show to the entire world. SO THAT’S WHAT WE’RE DOING!!!

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the-arbys-witch-blog · 7 years

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my middle name is tl;dr

It is kind of hard to come across in a written blog post the same way that you do in real life. I am sure people reading this blog (as I imagine at least one or two people might do in the future) would have a certain idea of the kinds of people Tierney and I are in person, but I don’t think it would be very accurate. In person, Tierney and I are bubbly and goofy and fun but when I am seated in front of a keyboard I have too much time to think about what I want to write and all of the funniness gets sucked out of whatever I am saying. So here is the question: should we try to be really funny, or should I just treat this like a normal blog?

My life can be broken down into phases based on what kind of pop culture I was consuming at the time. In high school I went through a long phase that was dominated by YouTube. On YouTube I was a Nerdfighter, completely obsessed with John Green, the vlogbrothers, and anyone else who called themselves Nerdfighters too. So in doing this blog project with my best friend, my mind keeps on going back to the format of people in correspondence with one another. I think from here on I am going to address my posts to Tierney and see how that feels.

Yo, T! (I never call you that, but maybe it will catch on.) Yesterday I applied for a job at McDonald’s because I am starting to feel like a total bum living with my parents, doing nothing all day, and letting them pay for all of my shit. I realized as I was typing that that you also live with your parents and they also pay for all of your shit but the difference is you’re going back to school soon and when you do you will be transformed again into a productive member of society. I haven’t been productive in months. And something about getting a paycheck and being able to support myself just makes me feel better, even if the job is soul sucking.

I am going to start writing posts with more substance soon. I was thinking about making this post about my Current Celebrity Boyfriend but I am having a really hard time translating the weird shit I do in person into text. It is making me think more and more about how maybe we should do a podcast, but I still have no idea what the concept or content would be besides you and me making weird jokes about Tony Stark, Robert Downey Jr, and Susan Downey’s cell phone. The easiest way for me to make a post with substance will be for me to do something revolving around food, but I forgot to take pictures of the shit I made for the New Year's Eve party, so that ship has sailed until the next time I have enough ingredients to make anything worthwhile.

I am having fun doing this, and I hope you are too even if my posts aren’t exactly what we had previously discussed. It’s nice to have a reason to sit and post something on a regular basis.

Here is my Weekly Roundup for the last 7 days (12/28/16-1/4/17)

Age: 22

Location: New Jersey, thank goodness

Feelings About the Future: nervous as hell, both that I might not get hired at McDonald’s and that I might

Pop Culture Consumption:

Movies-

I Love You, Man & The Martian both randomly came on TV one night so I stayed up pretty much all night watching them both. I had seen I Love You, Man multiple times before and my verdict on it is still that Paul Rudd is a national treasure. The Martian made me laugh, it made me cry, and it taught me how to love… again.

My mom wanted me to watch The Drop with her because James Gandolfini is one of my many boyfriends. You may be asking yourself “But Julia if he’s your boyfriend how have you never seen the Sopranos?” and to that I say that there are many things in my life that I am not proud of. The Drop is based on a book, stars Noomi Rapace, Tom Hardy, and James Gandolfini, and it was fucking amazing. I don’t want to say more because it’s one of those movies you really shouldn’t know much about before you watch it, and I probably couldn’t even explain it if I wanted to.

Then, our friend Vicky spent the night with me and she brought some DVDs with her. We have had a running joke about the fact that I have never seen Godzilla (1998) ever since I saw Godzilla (2014) and hated it. Vicky likes the 1998 flavor and knows I liked Matthew Broderick so she wanted me to see it. It only took 2 years but we finally sat down and watched it, and even though the CGI was underwhelming and the action sequences were mostly flimsy, Matthew Broderick and Hank Azaria are Certified Babes and made the viewing worthwhile.

TV-

Not much, honestly. I’ve been watching Top Chef this season but I can never remember any of the contestants’ names so writing about it might not be the best idea. I’m rooting for the guy that is a somehow more effeminate Mike Myers. (My hope is that the one person on the whole planet who is both watching Top Chef and reading this will chuckle at that.)

Podcasts-

I spent all day yesterday getting caught up on Comedy Bang Bang, My Brother, My Brother, and Me, and The Adventure Zone. Then I listened to a podcast Kathleen told me I would like called The Behemoth. It has 20 episodes and I listened to 11 of them all in one go (they are very short) and I love it!

This post ended up being kind of long and probably boring. Sorry about that! We should come up with a cute sign off.

-Julia

#julia

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im-a-volunteer · 6 years

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RULES: tag ten followers you want to know better!

TAGGED BY: @snicketsquadron

TAGGING: I don’t know anyone to tag! If you’d like to do it, go ahead!

NAME: Jennifer

STAR SIGN: Pieces

HEIGHT: 5’6”

WHAT’S YOUR MIDDLE NAME? Lee

PUT YOUR ITUNES ON SHUFFLE. WHAT ARE THE FIRST 6 SONGS THAT POPPED UP? I don’t use iTunes, but on Spotify it was The Strangers by St. Vincent.

EVER HAD A POEM OR SONG WRITTEN ABOUT YOU? Yes

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU PLAYED AIR GUITAR? I can’t recall the exact time, but definitely within the last six months. I play air drums more often.

WHO IS YOUR CELEBRITY CRUSH? There’s so many. Lizzy Plapinger, Sara Rue, Kate Walsh, Tatiana Maslany, Paul Rudd, Jason Bateman, to name a few.

WHAT’S A SOUND YOU HATE; SOUND YOU LOVE? I hate the sound of shoes scuffing against a floor, especially if the floor is dirty. I love the sound of a violin if it’s well tuned and the musician plays well.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN GHOSTS? Yes.

HOW ABOUT ALIENS? Absolutely. X-Files made me equal parts intrigued and terrified of aliens since I was a kid.

DO YOU DRIVE? Yes, when I visit my parents or go on a trip. I use the subway in the city.

IF SO, HAVE YOU EVER CRASHED? Yes, but never anything awful. Fender benders.

WHAT WAS THE LAST BOOK YOU READ? Milk and Honey by Rupi Kaur.

DO YOU LIKE THE SMELL OF GASOLINE? No.

WHAT WAS THE LAST MOVIE YOU SAW? Lady Bird

WHAT’S THE WORST INJURY YOU’VE EVER HAD? Totally had to edit this one because I forgot the time I tore my quad from falling up the stairs. I don’t think I’ve ever felt pain like that. And then I tore it again while playing soccer because I thought it healed. Basically I have a dent in my quad when I flex it. It’s gross.

DO YOU HAVE ANY OBSESSIONS RIGHT NOW? When am I not obsessing over something I’m interested in? Also, I have OCD. At the moment though, I’m obsessed with ASOUE hence this blog. I also get really into DIY projects.

DO YOU TEND TO HOLD GRUDGES AGAINST PEOPLE WHO HAVE DONE YOU WRONG? Yes. I try not to, but if someone pisses me off, I will remember the time they did XYZ three years ago. I won’t necessarily throw it in their face unless it was related.

IN A RELATIONSHIP? No. With my cat, yes.

#mun talk #[about the mun]#ooc

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njawaidofficial · 6 years

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18 People Who Probably Shouldn't Be Allowed To Meet Celebrities

https://styleveryday.com/2018/03/08/18-people-who-probably-shouldnt-be-allowed-to-meet-celebrities/

18 People Who Probably Shouldn't Be Allowed To Meet Celebrities

“Trying to disentangle my candy from an Emmy award winner’s arm hair was decidedly not a highlight for me.”

1. “I saw Nick Jonas and his girlfriend at the time, Olivia Culpo, on the streets of New York City and went to get a picture with them. I had no clue a paparazzo was filming across the street, so it was interesting when I came home to find the moment my skirt blew up from the subway grate was on YouTube. Now 160,000 people have seen my ass… Thank God I was wearing boy shorts that day.” – hayleyrae

2. “Gary Sinise does a lot of work with the USO and can often be found traveling the world visiting various military bases around the world, meeting the troops and performing with his band. He came to our base in Naples, Italy for July 4th, 2003. I was hammered thanks to the free-flowing margarita machines, and when our group got our turn to meet him and take pictures, I greeted him by hollering, ‘LIEUTENANT DAN, YOU GOT NEW LEGS!’ He must have heard this a bajillion times by now, so he was not amused, but tolerated it until I crowded in a little too closely for the picture and forgot about the sticky AF Ring Pop that was on my hand. It promptly adhered itself to his arm hair. Trying to disentangle my candy from an Emmy award winner’s arm hair was decidedly not a highlight for me.” – Sandra Navi Young, Facebook

3. “When I was about 10, I had the chance to meet President Obama through my dad’s work (he works at the air force base). When I met him, the first and only thing I said was, ‘That tie doesn’t look good with your grey hair.’ He laughed and tousled my hair, but I still think about it to this day.” – cassiej48d97d62b

NBC / giphy.com

4. “On Christmas Eve one year, Paul Rudd came into the store where I worked for a gift card. Desperate for something clever to say to him, I said, ‘Has anyone ever told you you look like David Schwimmer?'” – alih41dd2a5e5

5. “I went to the gym one day after work. The place was basically deserted, and I was excited because I really wanted to de-stress without feeling self-conscious. About five steps outside the locker room, I see Joe Keery from Stranger Things. I LOVE that show, and I loved him in it, but something about seeing him standing there in workout gear checking his smartphone kind of broke my brain. I forgot his name, his character’s name, my name, and how to walk and talk. Instead of saying something, I stopped dead in my tracks and kind of…yelped? I was so mortified, and of course because the gym was empty there was nowhere to hide. I kept running into him – by the water fountain! By the treadmills! I was so self-conscious I left after about half an hour, and frantically texted my best friend the whole way home. We agreed it was one of my more awkward moments.” – Emily Mason, Facebook

6. “I was working at swanky hotel and restaurant and Hugh Jackman had been staying there with his family for a few weeks filming a movie. I’d just pulled a 12-hour shift so my mind was mush, and I ended up serving him at a table. I went to pour him some water automatically, but forgot I hadn’t asked him if he wanted any and tried to stop myself. My tired mind had already started the process of pouring. I basically poured a bottle all over his leg, where his phone was sitting, while asking, ‘Did you want water?’ He was such a damn nice guy that he just looked up at me and said, ‘I usually prefer it in my glass.'” – charlies46d587761

ABC / giphy.com

7. “The company I work for has a lot of actors coming in on a daily basis, and Steve Buscemi was scheduled to come in one day. At the time I was drawing a blank trying to conjure a mental image of him because for some reason I tend to get him, Willem Dafoe, and Christopher Walken mixed up. I had Google Image searched him, gotten up, and was getting water or something, when I saw the receptionist leading him right past my computer. Of course, he glanced at the screen full of pictures of his face.” – zombie93

8. “My best friend and I went to Tampa Bay Comic Con in 2014 just to meet Evan Peters. When it was my turn for a photo I asked him to do the prom pose with me, and he put his arms around my chest and hugged me from behind. He definitely should’ve put his arms around my waist, but I guess he didn’t know that, so for a moment in time, I spaced out, forgot Evan was a major celebrity and readjusted his hands, not realising they were pretty much touching my boobs. If that wasn’t bad enough, I got a text message from my mother right before the photo was taken while Evan was hugging me from behind. He jumped a little, laughed and said, ‘Oh! Uhh I think you got a text!’ My phone was in my back pocket and it had vibrated on his crotch when the text came in!” – sarcasticsierra

9. “I attended a taping of Mike and Molly, and after filming, we got to meet the cast. When it came to meeting Melissa McCarthy, I told her that I identified with the characters she portrays and ‘it’s coming out of me like lava’. What I didn’t follow up to say was that I laughed the hardest at that scene in particular. She was repulsed and said, ‘That doesn’t sound pleasant.'” – kimberlyd4f5b81ae2

Warner Bros. Television / giphy.com

10. “I was at a Miranda Sings show a couple of summers ago with my mom, my sister, my sister’s best friend, and her mom. We were waiting in line to go in and we saw a bunch of girls taking a picture with a tall, attractive man. My sister’s friend’s mom informed me that they were taking a picture with Liam Hemsworth. I had no clue what Liam looked like, I just knew he was famous and wanted to get a good Instagram, so I chased him into the lobby and took a very awkward picture with him. I used my default celebrity meeting line, telling him that I loved his work. He looked confused, but thanked me, and we moved on. It was only after I posted the photo on Instagram that I realised how weird this was. What would Liam Hemsworth be doing at a Miranda Sings show? Why was he walking in with a random blonde girl and not Miley Cyrus? Apparently, other people shared my confusion, because some girl commented on my photo to inform me that I had in fact met Robert Graham from The Bachelor.” – caylai2

11. “One time my friend and I were on the subway and a guy came on and sat down next to us. I told my friend that I thought it was Ansel Elgort, but she wasn’t sure, so when it got to our stop I said to him, ‘Has anyone told you that you look like Ansel Elgort?’ He responded, ‘Yeah I get that a lot.’ As I got off the train I heard someone else say to him, ‘Is that because you are Ansel Elgort?’ He chuckled and said yes. Cue facepalm.” – jblass

12. “My friend invited me to go meet the original cast of Hamilton in New York City. We were admitted directly on to the stage in the theatre, and immediately we saw a man in a ponytail, centre stage, talking to at least 10 people. We walked over, and my friend is basically tripping over herself, stuttering words of admiration about the man. In my head, I’m like, ‘Why is she being so weird? Who is this guy?’ He was so warm and sweet. He introduced himself as Lin, and my friend is literally ready to pee herself. Instead of telling him my name, I asked him where Leslie Odom Jr was. It wasn’t until 20 minutes later that I realised I shrugged off a conversation with one of the most prominent playwrights in modern history, Lin-Manuel Miranda.” – cpacheco

ABC / giphy.com

13. “My husband and I had the lucky opportunity to go to a food and wine weekend at a luxury glamping resort in Montana. Laura Prepon from Orange Is The New Black was there as well. My husband indulged too heavily in the wine part of the weekend, and proceeded to spill her own drink on her.” – kelseyu4da6cfd12

14. “A couple of years ago, I met Michelle Williams (the actress, not one third of Destiny’s Child) after seeing her star in Cabaret on Broadway. I made sure to head to the stage door to meet her, and while she was graciously signing my playbill, I was mesmerised by her legit, make up-free glow. I just stared at her, dazed, and said, ‘I. Love. Your. Skin.’ It was totally creepy. I felt like Buffalo Bill from Silence of the Lambs.” – natalieh49b5c843e

15. “I saw Emma Watson at the Beverly Hilton the day before the SAG Awards about five years ago. I smiled at her politely without realising who it was, then made a sort of squealing sound when it clicked and instinctively began to follow her and her friend throughout the hotel. I spent the next 45 minutes peeking into hotel room windows to see if I could find them and get proof that I’d met her. I was eventually escorted off the premises.” – phoebeg4870dc518

Warner Bros.

16. “I was picking up takeout from a place in the Pacific Palisades with my friend and I accidentally opened a door into a man’s face. I immediately apologised, he shrugged it off, and my friend and I got into our car. The first thing she said was, ‘Dude, that was Ben Affleck.’ Apparently I slammed a door into Ben Affleck’s face. Not my finest moment.” – victorias4e1b807b6

17. “I met Peter Dinklage at a brewery in Asheville when he was filming Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri. I got up the courage to talk to him and he was so nice! He made some comment about being there with Daniel Day Lewis, and gestured to the person to his right. It clearly wasn’t Daniel Day Lewis, so I kind of laughed and continued taking a selfie of the two of us. It wasn’t until I saw the two later that I realised it was Sam Rockwell. My boyfriend, who was with me, brings up the fact that we dissed Sam Rockwell at least once a week.” – Megan Williams, Facebook

HBO

18. “I brushed shoulders with The Edge and immediately vomited.” – annet4c7172ded

Note: Some submissions may have been edited for length and/or clarity.

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