#i should really pass out now but i will probably rb this in the morning when the fucking. the lineup thing refreshes or w/e
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not to genshin post at quarter to four in the morning, but today, on the one year anniversary of getting into the game, i finally FUCKING GOT 36* IN ABYSS FUCK YEAH
#actually not to genshin post at all. i've straight up never done this all i've done this past year has been rb gnshn stuff#nat is playing the event quest and reacting out of context i know nothing abt what's going on it's great#i just learn the lore and get consulted when she needs to know some details abt liyue lore bc i know all of that#and talking abt various aus we've come up with#i should really pass out now but i will probably rb this in the morning when the fucking. the lineup thing refreshes or w/e#花話#it is probably for the best that i do not gnshn post anyway bc i can and will talk abt my spoiled in-game children for hours
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just a few more
Diavolo, Barbatos, Mephisto + two bonus characters // 3.k wc
*disclaimer: this is written as poly!romantic mc + all dateables
not only did Mc bag the seven lords of hell, they also ended up bagging the prince, his butler, and his highest ranking noble. Yk, as they should.
a/n : we’re gonna pretend Diavolo didn’t say he couldn’t form a pact with us just bc he’s the prince/future king because I think that’s a load of shi—
It all started with you mentioning how pretty you thought Barbatos’ pact was. You said it casually- in passing- when you and the brothers had been over for tea. They were all fighting (with the exception of Lucifer and maybe Beel and Satan) over who’s pact mark looked the best when you dropped the bomb.
“Come oooon, Mc! You don’t havta pick a favorite or anythin’, just tell us which one looks the best!”
“That’s the same thing, moron!”
“OI!”
Smiling, you picked the choice least likely to start a fight, “I think Barbatos has a pretty sigil. Solomon showed me once.” Yep- there definitely wasn’t any room to argue when they all had their jaws on the floor.
Oh, but you sent a shock of heat straight through Barbatos, who was the last one expecting your particular reply.
Not even the uproar from the brothers or the shit eating grin from his master could make that heat dim. In fact, it only grew stronger at the mischievous smile you sent him.
And then you showed up on the castle’s doorstep, bruised and bleeding, while crying out his name.
“B-bar— Barba-tos! Barbatos!” it was the only coherent thing he could decipher as he watched you sob violently into his chest, fist clutching his shirt so hard he almost thought it’d rip.
You’d been in the Devildom for so long now, it was a shock that anything could scare you this badly- but when you managed to choke out that a group of demons ganged up on you, the butler felt searing hot threads of possessiveness and rage grip at him.
They’d touched you- hurt you. You were probably crying out for him while you fought your attackers and he didn’t hear it. He couldn’t hear it.
The final blow to his wavering resolve came only an hour later :
“Why didn’t you call one of the brothers? You could’ve gotten fatally wounded if you hadn’t been using your magic.” He was scolding you.
And you were smiling. “I didn’t want one of them at the time. I wanted you.”
…oh.
“B-rb…Ba-rb-os…Barbatos!”
He blinked, staring at you blankly, “Huh?” Did he really just space out?
“I said I’m sorry for worrying you and putting my life in danger. I’ll be more careful next time and call on my pacts.”
Your pacts. Pact. “May I have the pleasure of entering a pact with you?”
Surprised, you stared at Barbatos like he had three heads for a moment. “Me? A p-pact with me? But I thought—“
Barb interrupted by grasping your hands and bringing them to his lips, “If you think I do not trust you, I must ask you to think again.”
You watched him press your intertwined hands against his chest, where his heart is, before he was leaning closer- closer than he’d ever been.
“I trust you, Mc. Do you trust me?”
Voice nothing more than a whisper and without a trace of hesitation, “Yes. I’ll make a pact with you- I want to make a pact with you.”
Barbatos’ eyes darkened ever so slightly as he gave you a genuine smile, “Excellent.”
Then his lips were on yours and your hands broke apart so he could cup your face while yours went straight to his hair and you could faintly feel the tingle of your new bond but kissing him felt too surreal for you to even begin deciphering where it was located.
7 -> 8
†
Mephisto was certain he only tolerated you due to your closeness with the seven brothers and his lord- it’s all anybody heard him run his mouth about when you were mentioned. But when he got scolded by his kid brother for saying such things about you, he simply decided he had to see what everyone saw in you- and boy, was he straight up beat down with the realization.
“Good morning, Mc.”
Without even questioning why he was suddenly speaking to you out of the blue, you smile brightly and stop walking, “Morning, Mephisto! I like your tie, is that one new?”
He blinks in surprise— you…noticed? “Yes, it is. I thought I might change things up every now and then.”
“It’s pretty! Like you!” Not even embarrassed at such a bold comment, you point in the direction of the newspaper club’s office (which was opposite of the student council’s- where you were supposed to be going), “I’ll walk you to your office so we can talk some more, yeah? I don’t get to see you much!”
One day he caught you taking care of his little brother and the feelings just intensified.
“Now, now, none of that. You’ll make your eyes all swollen-“ you wiped away the boy’s tears, “and then your little head will hurt-“ your hand ruffled his hair playfully, “and we can’t have that, can we?”
Mephisto watched you carefully doctor his brother’s scraped knee, not noticing his feet were moving until he was right beside you.
Smiling at the excited ‘big brother!’, you glance up in acknowledgment before placing a bandaid over the injury. “All better!” You kiss his knee, giving him another on the forehead before helping him stand.
And as you and Mephisto watch the younger demon run off with a wave, he can’t help but feel the slightest bit miffed at the kisses you’d given said demon. It must’ve shown too, because—
“Oh, ‘Phisto,” you couldn’t stop giggling, even after you’d grabbed his face and pulled him down, “If you want a kiss, all you have to do is ask.”
You kissed him on the cheek, patting it afterwards, before leaving with a grin (and leaving him behind with a blush and a hint of possessiveness).
Not even a full week after that, Mephisto quickly decided that you simply couldn’t go any longer without it.
“Form a pact with me.” He stamped down the urge to shuffle nervously under your surprised stare, “..please?”
Your expression slowly morphed into a giddy smile, “I’d love to make a pact with you, ‘phisto.” Feeling the familiar warmth of the forming sigil, you beamed at him.
He could feel it too; the bond threading itself together— his first (and only) pact. “Mc…” his tongue felt like lead but he knew what he wanted. All he had to do was ask. “May I have a kiss?”
“As many as you want.” You sounded breathless as you brushed over his lips with your own, connecting them eagerly once he grabbed onto your hips.
He nearly jumps when you grab onto his tie, though he steels himself and pulls you even closer, not daring to break the kiss for more than a couple seconds at a time. Now that he’s felt this…Mephisto doesn’t think he can live without it.
8 -> 9
†
Your pact with Diavolo, while he truly wanted to have that relationship and bond with you, mostly happened due to childish jealousy. He’d dealt with your happy ramblings about your pact with Barbatos for months, but then…
“Another pact? With Mephisto? How ever did you manage that?”
Either you didn’t notice the strain in Diavolo’s voice or you simply didn’t bother pointing it out, your smile stayed as you hummed happily.
“I didn’t really do anything. ‘Phisto just came up to me all of a sudden and asked to make a pact.”
“He asked?” If Diavolo wasn’t bothered before, he sure was now. Mephistopheles in a pact? It was simply unheard of, and now, he was the only demon in your group without a pact with you. “I see…”
It was such a petty feeling, because truly, he was thrilled for all of his friends— Diavolo just felt undeniably left out despite no one treating it that way [but him].
“I swear if the four of you stubborn bastards don’t take a break, I’ll make you!” giving a deadpan stare, you crossed your arms and stood in front of the demons seated at the student council table.
Mephisto relented immediately, having heard of what exactly you can do with your pacts, and chose to go get some coffee. Lucifer- after a quick staredown- followed the noble, but not without leaving a kiss on your hand in silent ‘thanks’. Barbatos and Diavolo, however, remained in their spots.
“I appreciate the sentiment, Mc, but we really must finish; these are documents for RAD’s-”
“Barbatos. Take a break.” you watched his hands release the papers involuntarily, smiling at his incredulous stare, “At least go eat something. Please.” when Barb reluctantly stood from his chair, you turned to Diavolo and leaned to rest your forehead against his. “Just because I can’t make you, doesn’t mean you’re exempt from this. Up- come on.”
And while his heart was practically beating out of his chest at the care you showed for him, that ugly jealousy still churned inside him at the clear display of difference in your relationships between him and the others.
Everything finally bubbled over the day you confessed to him :
“Apologies, Mc, but could you…repeat that?”
Ducking your head to hide the flush of your cheeks, you fiddled with your fingers, “I like you, Dia- if that wasn’t already obvious, and Barbatos and a few of the others agreed that I should tell you and ask if you’d like to date me too…”
Diavolo answered a bit too fast and desperate for his liking, “Yes! I-I mean, yes, I would be overjoyed to be in a relationship with you, Mc.”
“But?” you squinted, knowing something was- and had been for a while- on his mind. “What’s wrong? You’ve been like this for weeks.”
“Nothing is wrong, I just…” Follow his heart or follow the rules? “I just want to be in a pact with you like all the others.” he averted his eyes, feeling childish when he spoke those feelings aloud.
You only giggled, “That’s it, huh? I would love to enter a pact with you, Dia. Wait- are you even allowed? As the prince and future king, I mean?”
As soon as you agreed, his hands were already cupping your face, “I don’t care-” his lips finally, finally met yours as his feet began moving, walking you backwards until you hit the wall, “-I decide what I want and I’ve wanted you for so long, been jealous of the others for so. long.”
With the pact etching itself into your skin, you couldn’t deny him anything in that moment, completely enamored with the way Diavolo was practically begging for you, still, even though he already had you.
9 -> 10
+bonus
When Simeon fell completely, wings black and horns protruding from his head, he desperately needed something to ground him while he worked through his new body and new status.
“They’re so pretty, Si.” You were brushing through his wings softly, smiling at the contrast it brought to your glittery nails, “Your horns, too.”
Simeon shifted, nervous despite your words at letting anyone else see his new form. “Do you really think so?” his spine straightened at the feeling of your lips pressing kisses down his back.
“I do. You’re so beautiful- angel, human, or demon.” Nuzzling your head into his neck, you smiled against the skin, “In fact, I’m going to have to fight off so many demons just to keep you to myself.”
That made him chuckle, body relaxing into yours easily, “Nonsense…that might be quite a sight, though.”
Adjusting wasn’t hard— he thinks he had an easier time at it than the brothers, but he couldn’t help but feel something was missing.
It was difficult to not fiddle with his outfit, but in Simeon’s defense, this was his first time at one of Diavolo’s formal parties as a demon— and the first time everyone saw his demon form.
Tsking, you gently slapped his hands away and re-straightened his shirt. “Don’t pay any attention to the staring. You’re just too pretty to look away from.”
He knew it was because, in all technicalities, he was a fallen angel, even if he’d been human before this. But he also knew that if anyone was an expert in unwanted spotlight attention, it was you.
“I’ll try not to, thank you, Mc.” Simeon smiled at your pleased expression, “May I have this first dance?”
As the night went on, he watched you dance with the other nine demons (and with the other members of Purgatory Hall). Everything was like it always was- nothing changed after he became a demon. Still though….
“Simeon!” you called out with a bright smile, hand waving him over to join the dancing circle you, Mammon, and Asmo had created.
He felt as if there was something absent in him, something he couldn’t describe. “I’m coming.”
Finally, Simeon figured out the missing puzzle piece.
Laying with you, clad in only your underwear, always brought him a sense of love and tranquility. He simply couldn’t get over how vulnerable and exposed you were willing to be around him.
“Siiimeonnn~” you sang, laughing when his eyes fluttered sleepily. Your fingers carded through his hair, making him hum in delight, and you hummed right back at the faint feeling of his nails tracing over your pacts.
He continues to trace the slightly raised skin, not thinking too much about it until you mumble something about how he’s always had a fascination for the marks adorning your body. At that, Simeon sits up quickly, all traces of tiredness gone.
You follow his lead worriedly, “Simeon? What’s-”
“Make a pact with me. Please, Mc, please, I don’t think I’ve ever wanted anything more- I knew something was missing when I became a demon and now I know it’s because everyone else is bonded to you but me. I couldn’t have that with you as an angel or human but I can now. Please, Mc, allow me to be selfish just this once.”
“Oh, Si…” there was an undeniable warmth blooming in your chest. “You never needed a pact to feel bonded to me— you’ve always been perfect the way you are.”
Simeon let out a shaky breath, allowing you to shift closer while his heart thumped wildly in anticipation.
You moved even closer, and closer still, until you were practically in his lap. “You can be as selfish as you want with me. I’m yours, and now-“ your lips brushed, “-you belong to me, in turn. I’m honored you trust me enough for this, Simeon, of course I’ll make a pact with you.”
And although your lips have met in this dance time and time again in the past, and will surely do the same in the future, it still sent shivers down his spine and heat to his face.
When his hands move to trace your pacts out of habit again, his is the first he finds- guided by your own hands- and devils does that make Simeon’s head spin; he’s finally complete.
10 -> 11
++extra reverse!bonus [no specific demon form]
For someone with 72 pacts and ongoing shameless attempts at getting Lucifer into one, it surprisingly didn’t occur to Solomon once you became a demon (in his defense, he was more focused on your well being and adjustment).
“You need to stop scratching, Mc. I know it itches, but you’re going to get an infection. You’ll get used to them eventually.”
While he was lecturing, you were practically boneless in his lap, keening as he softly rubbed your horns and applied ointment on the irritated areas.
“Are you even listening to me?” He huffed in false annoyance, feeling a smile fight its way onto his face when you whined at the loss of his touch.
Nudging your head against his hand, you stubbornly huffed right back. “Yes. Don’t be mean- feels good. You're so sweet to me…”
“Don’t get used to it, darling apprentice. You’ll learn how to do this yourself eventually, too.”
And while you did in fact get the hang of caring for your own demon form, you simply enjoyed when he did it instead.
“You know, each of the ten demons you have wrapped around your finger would jump at the chance to help you.”
You hummed in agreement, curling in on yourself at the blissful feeling of Solomon grooming your extra appendage(s).
He lifts a brow, “And yet I’m still called, why? No complaints here of course, but I am curious.”
“Want you.” Stretching, you shift onto his lap to be closer, “Don’t you want me anymore, Sol?”
Solomon inhales sharply, tilting his head so you have more room where you’re nipping at his pulse point with your sharpened canines, “Of course I do, Mc.”
The lightbulb finally goes off in his brain when he catches you glaring at his bare upper body, to which he’s all too happy to oblige you :
“What’s with that look?” Based on the tone of his voice, he very well knew what said ‘look’ was for.
You bared your teeth anyway. “You’re mine.” nails scratched over the pacts on his lower stomach as your hands gripped and prodded at every small inch of bare skin you could see.
Solomon wanted to see just how possessive a new demon could get. Did you have those instincts yet, especially since he was already yours beforehand? “I am. So why don’t you prove it?”
“Gladly.” Your voice came out as a low growl, hands finally coming to a stop when your fingers brushed ever so slightly below his belt. “I think mine will go riiight…here.” You pressed down over his pelvis firmly.
He tried not to stutter, “o-oh?” but he could feel the blush snaking up his face.
“Make a pact with me, Solomon. ‘S not fair you have so many marks but mine…mine’ll be the prettiest, though…especially on you.”
“Fuck- yes, I’ll form a pact with you, Mc—“ Solomon’s back arches at your pact etching into his skin, having forgotten the feeling, but the knowledge that it’s yours makes it all the more better.
“mine, mine, mine. Is this proof enough, or do I need to prove it further?”
#obey me x reader#om x reader#barbatos x reader#om barbatos#diavolo x reader#om diavolo#mephisto x reader#mephistopheles x reader#om mephisto#simeon x reader#om simeon#solomon x reader#om solomon#obey me drabbles
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( TO BEAT THE DEVIL )
An introduction.
FORMAT: teleplay / novel
GENRE: horror, coming of age
LOGLINE: An interning demon drives a pair of twins cursed with obedience and honesty to kill their cult leader.
THEMES: Trauma, sexual abuse, domestic violence, victim blaming (particularly self blame), peer pressure, redemption, internalized homophobia, and religion.
TRIGGER WARNINGS: Sexual abuse, violence, domestic and otherwise, manipulation, and death
EXTENDED SUMMARY, CHARACTERS, EXCERPT AND NOTES:
Carmine can taste it. They're hiding something. Humans have such a silly smell about them, turns an overwhelming shade of sweet when they've made a demonic deal. All four of these children have. He just can't figure out what, and more importantly: why.
It keeps him on the surface longer than he should be. Long enough that Lilith sees it fit to send him a fucking trainee? And if that wasn't insult enough, the trainees one of the eternal teenage know-it-alls.
He's already got four annoying toddlers to trail, and now there's one tugging his hand in the new generation's approach to soul-catching like Carmine isn't one of the best employees they've had since the turn of the century.
And somehow, to make it all worse, the trainee is good at it. And if Carmine wants to keep his spot at the top of the food chain, he's going to have to get the soul of that dumb bitch who's running the joint.
But, of course, the kid gets him murdered??? And then has the nerve to figure out how what those toddlers managed to stick their syrupy, grubby little hands in. What gives?
But two can play at that game. If he can't get the dead guy's, then he can have the next best thing.
Jesse has lived just under seventeen years, but he's ready to check out. Or he was. But of course, some selfish bastard had to come along and say you can't ever act on those thoughts again! Don't think like that!
And then the hole kept getting deeper.
Six feet deep, to be exact. He's got blood on his hands and no matter how fucking good it felt to cut off the air supply to the God who stole his innocence, it's probably not going to feel very good to watch his mom suffer through a highly publicized trial with headlines like CHILD MURDERS HIGH PROFILE BENEFACTOR!!!
Oh. Well. Billy did say if he really got in that deep, he could always strike up a deal. His soul, everything wrapped up in a nice little bow, sweet as Easter Sunday. But until then? Yeah, he's content to live in a stupid fucking Sherlock Holmes novel.
CHARACTERS:
JESSE NIX: A soon-to-be seventeen-year-old saddled with the curse of obedience. Unlike miss-lucky-Ella-Enchanted, he wasn't told to give away his mommy's locket. No-siree. He was told to give away his virginity. In his opinion, the only appropriate payback is a life. Maybe, one day, if he really snaps, he'll dig up Pastor Dallin's corpse and chop his dick off. Really stick it to the man. If he doesn't go to prison first, anyway. (spotify playlist)
NANCY NIX: Also a soon-to-be-seventeen-year-old, though saddled with the curse of honesty. It's really not so bad. That is, until she stumbles across the sight of her dearest little brother covered in blood for no reason he can push through his metal braces. She refuses to believe he did it on purpose. If only she could convince the cops without sounding like a nutjob. (spotify playlist)
BEVERLY PINES: A seventeen-year-old cursed to feel the pain of those around her. It makes for some fun family dinners with a sadistic mom and a missing dad. Distance nulls pain, but she can't ever seem to make it past state lines before her mom gets wise and breaks one of her ribs. Oh, well. She's got a bone to pick with psychos like her mom. Apparently, Pastor Dallin was one of them. She doesn't think she could stomach the pain of killing someone, so next best thing, right? (spotify playlist)
CLARICE ANDERMANN: Also a seventeen-year-old cursed to be constantly in motion. It's honestly not that bad. She's Yale bound! Perks of having endless energy for everything to cheerleading to debate contests, though she can't imagine her heart's going to keep up like this. It's already hanging on by a thread. That thread is named Beverly Pines and like hell she's letting it go to prison for nothing. (spotify playlist)
BILLY: An annoying fuck trapped in a seventeen-year-old's body. No curses. The opposite, in fact - blessed with a silver tongue and a keen sense of deduction. It takes him all of two hours to put together (almost) everything about Jesse Nix. He just didn't think he could push the repressed little fuck to murder that quick. (All the more power to him, though. Prison always makes people desperate and paranoid, AKA: an easy mark.) (spotify playlist)
MAVIS EVANGELISTA: Former housewife turned grieving widow turned revered prophet. If she got a little help from someone downstairs, then who's to know? They love her all the same. Now, she really, really wants to see how far she can push them all. (spotify playlist)
CARMINE: Just a helpful guy, passing through. Really doesn't need anything, just a little pledge, is all! And then? Then, you can have everything you want, fame, money, power, love. The sky is your limit. The water's fine! (Ignore the piranhas, they'll wait till you're dead to eat your face, just a little bit.) (spotify playlist)
NOTES:
- all of these characters have equal importance within the story.
- personal tag system for story stuff is '#tbtd' and character tags are just first name (ex: '#jesse')
- this is kind of really fucked up. the only reason i wrote it was cause i was thinking damn ella enchanted really is NOT fucked up enough. like i don't think the author of ella enchanted went dark enough. a locket? that's it? a bitch move. i'm taking it to straight murder and sexual abuse
- jesse transgender, no character straight except evil people
- i'm not entirely sure how tag lists work but i think i get the gist of them?? idk if you want rb or ask or something </3
EXCERPT:
There were moments, where she was reminded just how different this voice was, how violent.
She had found Lynette, making off with her makeup that she’d spent her own allowance on. Mavis doted on her and, from what she’d seen of other families, everyone else looked upon their little siblings with contempt, despising the burden they dragged along with their existence.
But Mavis adored Lyn. When she'd been born, her mother had come home with a tiny thing bundled in pink fleece. Mavis had taken to Lyn on sight, thinking Lynette’s headband adorned with a baby blue bow was the universe’s way of telling her happy birthday! as reparations for the ones her mother had missed while she was enduring her week long stay at the hospital.
But that mindset was a disease, one that had finally caught up with her. Had Lynette not become her burden? She was nineteen, busting her back day and night so Lynette wouldn’t have to, that she might avoid the life that Mavis had lived in those blissful six years where it was her and her alone.
Had her mother not tampered down her birthday celebrations since Lynette’s was so very close and they couldn’t afford double anyway? Had Lynette not deprived her of the teenage experiences she heard her classmates speak of, going out and tasting alcohol for the first time while Mavis followed a ten year old Lynette house to house so she could complain of a stomach ache after she’d devoured all the candy on the walk back home?
And now this! Stealing her few precious items, the few things she bothered to save up for, few things she bothered to keep hidden. For what? It wasn’t as though she was ever going to have the courage to ask a peer of her’s out. She was a thief.
One Mavis had made the mistake of taking care of. She should’ve embraced those stirrings of resentment, should’ve left Lynette to her own devices since Lynette didn’t appreciate anything, or even half of what Mavis afforded her. She should’ve left her out in the cold that Christmas. How could anyone have known? It wasn’t as though corpses could talk--
She had let Lyn take off with the whole case, as if to remind herself when she woke up the next morning what she had considered, how vile the thought was.
Lyn had never done anything unforgivable to Mavis. Mavis didn’t suppose she ever could. It was no fault of Lyn’s she didn’t understand what it was like to live with their father. How could she? It was a topic off limits to Lyn by both Mavis and their mother. After all, a child born blind doesn’t know until it’s pointed out to them.
And yet, she found guilt hard to summon. She did, but the speed at which it came, the strength, made her uneasy. What had happened to the girl she was? Lyn had been her world. What had changed?
Then, dully, that other voice, entirely of its own volition, said You did.
#wip intro#writers on tumblr#writeblr intro#wip#wip introduction#current wips#my writing#writing#current wip#writing community#original wip#tbtd#my work
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history, huh?
chapter 3: propius
(check the rb for chapters 1 + 2 on tumblr + ao3 links!)
Adam was woken at 5 o’clock on the dot with a series of sharp knocks on his door. “Up and Adam,” Gansey’s voice called, making the one stupid dad joke that always set Adam’s blood to a boil. He was too tired to react, however.
“Kindly leave until a later time,” he called, his voice heavy with sleep. “I don’t have class for another three hours.”
Gansey opened the door anyway, striding in with more pep than anyone should have in the morning.
“You’ve made the tabloids, my friend. Your weekend with Ronan finally hit.”
“Did you sleep at all?”
“Nope,” Gansey said cheerfully. “‘From America, With Love: Ronan and Adam flaunt friendship.’” He turned on his heel once he’d crossed the length of the room, which Adam could never forget was formerly Malia Obama’s, and seated himself in Adam’s desk chair.
Adam had never been closer to considering strangulation. He elected to shove his hearing ear into his pillow instead.
Unfortunately, the muffled sounds of Gansey speaking still made their way in. “‘Photos: Adam’s Weekend in England,’ oh, that’s boring…ah-hah: ‘New Bromance Alert? Pics of FSOTUS and Prince Ronan.’”
Adam resigned himself to his fate and mentally promised himself a giant cup of coffee. “As long as I’m getting fewer death threats on Twitter, I’m happy,” he mumbled into his blankets.
Gansey ignored him. “Why are you so tired? It’s the hour of kings, time to be awake and alive.”
“I’d settle for dead if it meant I could sleep at this point, to be frank.”
“Please don’t be frank. Be Adam.”
Adam sat up, eyeing Gansey in his wire-framed glasses with disdain. “Any more puns and I suffocate myself with this pillow.”
“Please don’t,” Gansey said, but his eyes had already returned to his screen. While he read through the articles, he continued his line of questioning. “Working on the campaign late last night?”
“Not really,” Adam admitted. “I had a Press and the Presidency paper to write.”
“Just write ‘I’m Adam Parrish’ on a piece of loose-leaf paper to turn it in and you’ll probably get an A. You live it every day, for Christ’s sake.”
“And yet I still need to cite sources in Chicago Advanced.”
“You’d think nepotism would work out more in your favor.” He flicked to a fresh article, a gesture Adam only recognized from all the other times Gansey had done it. “Luckily, I think the press is eating this one up.”
Adam grimaced. “Fantastic.”
“Not-campaign-ruining, you mean.”
“That too, I suppose.” He wanted nothing more than to flop back against his pillows and get the sleep his body so desperately craved after being jet lagged for a week, but he fought the urge.
“That _ People _exclusive takes the cake, I think. I didn’t realize how much you cherished your relationship with Ronan.”
“Fuck off, please. Or end my misery.”
“No to both. Why are you even taking that press course?”
Adam slid out from under his blankets, rolling his shoulders to try and wake up more. “Curiosity, I guess. It never hurts to learn more of what not to do.”
Gansey looked up from his phone to level a glance at Adam. “And what have you learned so far?”
“…Don’t have a sex scandal?”
“You _ would _need someone to tell you that.”
_ “Hey,” _Adam said, affecting outrage.
Gansey lifted his thumb to run over his lower lip, tilting his head consideringly. “One of us three will probably have a scandal before your mother’s second term is up.”
“If there is a second.”
“Chin up, young padawan. With you working on it we’re guaranteed.”
“I don’t know, Gansey,” Adam replied. “I don’t think I’m the good luck charm you believe in.”
“Of course you are,” Gansey said. “We won the first time, no?”
Adam glanced exaggeratedly around the room and to the phone in Gansey’s hand. “I’d say so. That or we’re about to get questioned very thoroughly about the the events of last three years.”
“Don’t make me cut you off on the true-crime videos.”
His eyes narrowed, focusing on Gansey. “Don’t you dare.”
“Blue agrees, anyway,” Gansey said, successfully deflecting topics. “Said there’s a ninety-four percent chance you’ll get into a sex scandal before the general.”
“Both of you date more than I do, why am I the one who’s supposedly having a sex scandal?” Once his initial outrage passed, disbelief crept in at the time of day. “Did you just text Blue at five AM and get a response? How the hell did you manage that?”
“She’s been up,” Gansey dismissed. Adam stared at him for a moment, and then Gansey seemed to feel the weight of his stare. His eyes widened almost comically. “Oh, Christ, no, not that. Nate Silver asked for another set of eyes on the Superbowl predictions, and she’s trying to get a shoo-in with them before the primaries begin. I just brought her some coffee.”
“And you didn’t bring me any?”
“You’re the only one of us who hasn’t been up all night. You need coffee the least of all of us.”
“Don’t blame me for your bad decisions.” Adam squinted at Gansey. “Were you working on an article all night or something?”
He snorted. “Hardly. They’ve been blocking all of my pieces. Too far from my mother’s politics, too far from your mother’s, too controversial, too critical, all in that order.”
“Thought you were liking the _ Post _gig?”
“On paper,” Gansey dismissed. “I’ve defaulted to writing about Welsh history.”
“Sounds like it’s right up your alley, then.”
“Once again, on paper.”
“How do you even connect the Welsh to the hellscape of American politics?”
Gansey waved a hand. “‘Eternal spirit,’ ‘fighting for honor,’ ‘remembering Glendower and others who set a pristine model,’ et cetera, et cetera.”
“People read that? That just sounds like you in high school spouting off again.”
“Yes, Adam. People read it.” Gansey squinted at his phone again. “Twitter _ really _likes you and Ronan together.”
“We’re exciting,” Adam said dryly, reaching for his laptop. He scanned over his most recent paper while Gansey dramatically narrated replies to the gif of them on _ This Morning. _
“‘Either of them could stab me and give me one of those smiles and I’d thank them,’ Jesus Christ,” Gansey read, “They really love your fake smiles… ‘name a more iconic duo, I’ll wait,’ hm, maybe any other duo? ‘Oh my God, just _ kiss already.’” _
Adam choked out a laugh as Gansey punctuated the last one with a dramatic and uncharacteristic hand wave. “At least it’s working,” he allowed, shutting his laptop once he felt secure about his essay. “Now get out. _ Some _of us have places to be.”
Adam’s phone buzzed on his way out of his cursed Presidency and the Press course.
Somehow, the interest of those around him seemed to pique even higher when he looked at his phone instead of in front of him. It wasn’t a new sensation by any means; ever since starting at Georgetown, he’d felt eyes on him constantly, but the intensity increased tenfold each time his classmates thought he was too occupied to see them staring. He noticed every time, but of course nothing could be done about it.
The name _ HRH shitty bird boy _ popped across his screen. How strange - in only a week, he’d almost entirely forgotten that the name he had (quite maturely) given Ronan in his phone was… _ that. _As he swiped the notification open, he felt a certain amount of trepidation as to what a technology-averse prince would ever text him about.
His harassment and emergency fears flew out the window with the body of the text, simply a screenshot of their tabloid appearance with the added caption of _ youre the nerd and I’m the cool jock. _
_ Competitive yachting? _Adam asked in response, nearly tripping over his own feet while typing.
_ ffs i told them to stop writing that as my preferred sport. _
Adam felt his lips twist against his will.
_ I’m sorry, this is a common problem? _
_ you can’t even imagine. _
_ I appreciate that they consider competitive yachting a regal sport. _
_ status symbols and faux athleticism are the core of the monarchy. _
Adam blinked down at his phone, stopping short abruptly. Persephone, from behind him, adjusted accordingly.
He…hadn’t been expecting this. Any of it. The text, the almost-joking response, the casual statement about the monarchy being ridiculous despite him being in it. Their conversation ended there, and it was probably for the better. He resumed his pace, trying to get to his next class. He almost forgot about the texts, too; save for a rogue screenshot Adam sent him of speculation on Ronan’s presence in Majorca, nothing else went between them.
Sometimes, Adam could _ just barely _ get away with being on his phone during briefings with Maura. He hated to be distracted during them - they were _ important, _he knew that, but all the same occasionally she spent a particularly long time covering an obscure dignitary’s comments and he’d gotten too few hours of sleep to truly focus and someone or other was blowing up his phone.
Maura’s topic of conversation this week appeared to be a series of Buzzfeed articles run on the lack of pets in the First Family, complete with a power point dissecting their points
The glamorous side of politics, truly. Discussing a clickbait series in the West Wing briefing room.
_ iMessage chat to _ ** HRH shitty bird boy **
_ Resumed 30 October, 2019, 1:47 pm _
_ if you want a pet chainsaw dragged in a mouse the other day _
_ Ah yes, the mouse. A pet eternally beloved by constituents. _
_ we can’t all have a raven, that would be unfair _
_ Your heights of cool and goth are truly dizzying. _
_ im glad you agree _
_ Modest, too. _
_ it comes with the wealth and fame _
_ As long as you’re being straight with me, feel free to be as ‘modest’ as you like. _
_ i’m the prince of bloody england. i’m straight all the damn time _
_ That’s the biggest lhxemxlp_
His phone slipped from between his fingers, landing with a dull _ thud _onto the wooden floor. Adam stared helplessly at it, a sleek black rectangle hiding between types of oak. But Maura repeated his name, and he suddenly remembered what had made him drop his phone in the first place. He dragged his eyes up, staring at a spot on the sterile white wall just beyond Maura’s head.
“Adam,” she said a third time, but he refused to look her in the eyes. She conceded immediately. “What the hell?”
He felt his cheeks darken as blood found its way up. “I’m sorry.”
Her lips thinned just like Blue’s did, turning into a dark line on her brown face. “Do you even remember what I was saying?”
“Er…” he scrambled. “Don’t mention animals in any public setting?”
She looked at him for a long moment, then picked up a mug of coffee and took a controlled sip.
“Get out?” she said once she’d swallowed her sip.
“I-”
She pointed to the door. “I am impossibly busy. Take your phone and go laugh in private.”
He nodded once, finally, ducking under the table with his spine pressed against the bottom to grab his phone. His fingers closed around it, grip the edge of the wood, and he was up in a second.
He couldn’t regret it.
Because - well, here was the weird thing.
He wanted another text from Ronan.
_ iMessage chat to _ ** HRH shitty bird boy **
_ Resumed 31 October, 2019, 12:03 am _
_ it’s finally spooky day in your hell country _
_ Isn’t it 5 am in England? _
_ Do you ever sleep? _
_ bold of you to ask that question _
_ halloween, bitch _
_ it waits for no one _
_ I’m really going to have to advocate better habits. _
_ I understand, you’re enthused for Halloween. _
_ do you even care at all _
_ I enjoy halloween like everyone else. _
_ Though your level of excitement feels a little pagan? _
when the skeleton army rises Jesus will forgive me
_ appreciate this glorious day parrish _
_ I have enough fear in my daily life, thanks. _
_ I filed my own taxes all throughout highschool. _
_ And payed rent. _
_ The horrors of early adulthood. _
_terrifying _
_ terrible i’ll never deal with that shit _
_ You’re the prince, we know. _
_ Do you also not have enough horror in your life? _
of course i do
_ but parrish. listen. _
_ this is the one day a year all the monarchy and parliament dress as they are in life _
_ hideous monsters _
He laughed a little harder at that than he should have.
_ You’re telling me the monarchy plays dress up. _
_ ronan_frankensteins_monser_costume.jpg _
_ matthew insisted. did this on me an hour ago _
_ oh my god _
The makeup _ was _really good, and the monstrous look suited him, but hell if Adam ever said that to him.
He may have saved it to his phone, though, to glimpse Ronan’s green-paint covered skin and crooked, drawn-on stitch smile on his perfectly blank face.
Although Adam certainly didn’t intend to make a habit of texting the Prince of England, when he saw a funny bird or a stupid article or an obscure meme his first thought became _I should send that to Ronan. _And Ronan, clearly, was thinking along the same lines. The sheer number of sole emojis that seemed to tell a Ronan-centric story he received at all hours only affirmed that. And somehow, between all the pictogramme and jokes, he started to learn snatches of information. Declan was a better storyteller than Ronan, Matthew was the only person who could make Ronan attend family dinners ever since their father died, and his mother - the Queen of England, Adam had to remind himself sometimes - drew further away every day.
The problem became that he always wanted to know _ more, _and Adam didn’t know if that was due to his rampant curiosity or something else buried deep inside of him, and he was too afraid of what he might uncover by digging to look.
Adam had very few friends.
Most of that came with the territory of being part of the First Family; nothing made casual acquaintances drift away quite like being constantly surveilled by Secret Service agents and trailed by NDAs. Adam didn’t have time for small talk and coffee, a fact which he sometimes lamented and often loved. Part of this came from the type of friendship he became accustomed to with Gansey and Blue, the all-encompassing type of friendship that took over their minds in spare moments and forged ties stronger than steel between them. He’d probably forgotten how to have normal, casual friends, not friends an outsider would think he was completely in love with. And, perhaps more than anything else, it came back down to Robert Parrish and his heavy hands and ringing words. Adam’s memories of his first few years were scattered and inconsistent, but they filled up a too-large corner of his brain all the same. Blue, who entered his life at the tender age of 5, had won his trust with greater ease than their other peers, and Gansey had done the same in high school. They knew him and what he’d been through, and so they could (platonically) love him for all that he was. When campaigning and political office came into the mix, that full truth of Adam Parrish became a secret to guard like any else.
But, oddly enough, Adam had a third friend: Noah Czerny, the thirty-three-year-old baby of the Senate.
Noah and Adam met through an Aglionby networking event while Adam was a student and Noah a recently-elected congressperson, both green as grass in different ways. Adam, thrown neck-deep into a Presidential campaign, had questions, and most of the time Noah had answers. Although all of the professors had warned Adam to proceed cautiously with Czerny, Adam found nothing to fear. Noah had mellowed out quite a bit from his high school days, becoming a familiar face at political events and a surprisingly-wise piece of advice always at the ready. Despite Adam’s near hero-worship of this brand-new politician, half-Mexican just like him and just as frequent to lose sleep rewriting policies that unjustly taxed communities of color or defunded children’s education, they’d formed an improbable bond. The summer before his sophomore year, Noah let Adam closer to the politics process than even his mother had as he ran for the Senate, and Adam took to it almost at once. A politician twelve years his senior was perhaps not a conventional choice of friend, but Adam seldom remained conventional.
It wasn’t too out of the ordinary for Adam to arrive at Noah’s congressional office unannounced, either with business or without, and so when Adam rounded on Noah’s stark, bright, white office, he wasn’t at all surprised to see him ducked over an obscene number of papers.
“It’s Friday night,” Noah said without looking up, barely before Adam had even crossed into the office. As always, the tiny burst of color in the Pride flag deposited in a tourist mug drew Adam’s eye for a long moment before Noah himself did. All Adam could see of him was his brown curls, resolutely held in place even as bent over a desk. “Go party or something.”
“Damn, I didn’t _ think _ this looked like a frat. I knew something was off.” Adam slid into one of the seats across the desk. He had several inches on Noah, but he always felt smaller in those chairs across from the most important legislators in the country. “What’s got you here at eight PM?” Off of Noah’s brief, incredulous look, he amended to _ “this _particular time, I know. You’re salaried. Shouldn’t you…ever go home?”
“I’m trying to get something done so that there’s at least a hope of banning fracking in our lifetimes.”
Adam scoffed quietly, though not for lack of faith in Noah. “Let me know when you’ve cracked the code.”
_ “If, _but sure, I’ll be in contact. Now, why are you here?”
“You didn’t answer my leaving-the-building question.”
Noah’s eyes flickered shut briefly. “Jesus, Adam, I am salaried by the taxpayers of millions of Americans. I’m not going to slack on them.”
“Fine, but don’t make me drag Gansey in here to make you take a long nap and drink some hot soup.”
Adam’s phone buzzed, but he ignored it; despite it being almost 1 am in England, Ronan could presumably take the blame. Noah asked, “Did you catch the Fox town hall last night?”
Adam grimaced. He’d seen part of it, trying to multitask with his macroeconomics homework at the same time, but instead he’d fallen asleep with his head on the laptop screen. “Part of it. It was a shitshow.”
“You can say that again.”
“I honestly thought that Whelk would pull more support from the extremists. He just seemed desperate last night.”
“Oh, he definitely was.” Noah leaned away from his desk, appraising Adam as though considering his words carefully. “We went to school together.”
“Aglionby?” Adam asked. He knit his eyebrows together. “How did I not realize he went there?”
“The school doesn’t exactly love toting him.”
“He’s older than you, though, right?”
“Yes, Adam,” Noah said slowly. “I’m thirty-three. He’s already announced a bid for President. How old do you have to be to run for executive office?”
Adam scowled. “I just came from class, I can’t use my brain. He was a senior when you were a freshman?”
“Yep,” Noah replied. “We were paired in upperclassmen-lowerclassmen bonding.” His lip curled a little. “He outed me.”
“Wait, _ what?” _
“He outed me to the school,” Noah repeated. He looked back down to the papers on his desk, his voice softening to a barely audible level. “I trusted him, which was a dumb thing to do, but I was a really stupid freshman. Scared, too. He was a friendly personality.”
_ “Fuck,” _Adam said, pushing a hand through his hair. “I’m sorry, that’s…”
“Terrible?” A bit of Noah’s life returned to him. “Don’t worry about it, kid. It was years ago.”
“But then…Whelk, he was the reason you…?”
“He didn’t make my parents react the way they did. They did that on their own. But no, they wouldn’t have known without him.”
Adam shook his head. “I thought it wasn’t possible to like the guy less, if only because of his politics, but he’s done it.”
“Done what? Received the full wrath of Adam Parrish?”
“He very well may.”
“Don’t worry about him. Whelk will be out soon, believe me. I know him. He may have his parent’s money, but he’s barely old enough to hold office and he’s running on fumes.”
“If he’s not, I’ll convince Blue to skew stats until he is.” Noah knew just as well as Adam that that wouldn’t change anything, but it lightened the air anyway. “It seems kind of pointless to entertain any of them. Greenmantle is probably going to win no matter what.”
Colin Greenmantle: former antique collector, congressperson from Massachusetts, and millionaire with the funds to take over the Republican primary, and very possibly the whole election, before any papers were even filed.
“It’s early,” Noah said. “Too early to worry about it. Too early to even be _ talking _ about it.”
Adam slanted a half-smile at him. “Never too early to worry about an election.”
Noah looked back to his papers before broaching the next topic. “I hear you’ve got a job on your mother’s re-election campaign.”
“Once I graduate, and maybe a little earlier, yeah.”
Noah cast a glance around the office. “Are you sure this is the life you want?”
Adam knew he was referring to the constant bustle, the fear of disappointing and harming instead of helping, and the ever-evolving media scrutiny. He knew it was the closest Noah would give to a warning. “I’m sure.”
Noah sighed. “Fine.” He pointed to the door. “But I won’t let you throw your youth away, not this early. After you graduate, Parrish. Go get drunk and make out with someone.”
Adam stood, his frame unfolding and standing tall. “You are a terrible role model.”
“Can’t hear you over the loud music.”
“You and Blue and Gansey - if I die of alcohol poisoning, it’s all your fault.”
“Feel free to blame, so long as you’re out there and not here.”
“Alright, alright, Jesus. You’ve made your point.”
“Finally,” Noah called after Adam’s retreating form. But Adam could hear the amusement in his voice all the same.
For someone so allergic and averse to technology, Ronan sure seemed to share a lot with Adam.
_ iMessage chat to _ ** HRH shitty bird boy **
_ Resumed 13 Novemeber, 2019, 8:38 pm _
_ bird.m4a _
_ she wont stop nuzzling my head?? _
_ Picking for lice, probably. _
_ God knows you have so many. _
_ my scalp is perfectly clean _
_ Forgive me for abstaining from running my hands over it all the same. _
_ I’ll leave that to her. _
He didn’t always respond, though.
Adam tried not to read into it.
(He mostly succeeded.)
Adam never tired of stepping into the Oval Office. On the Wednesday right before Thanksgiving, he stepped in with the same amount of awe he always had, allowing himself a single moment to glance around at the wide windows and perfectly upholstered furniture. He sat on one of the couches without preamble.
His mother looked up from what was in front of her on the desk and smiled, albeit a tired one that frayed a bit at the corners; Adam had seen a few particularly troublesome foreign dignitaries be escorted away not long before, so he didn’t have to guess at the reason. Ana looked like she belonged to sit right there amongst all the history at that desk, from the sun dipping just beneath her halo of hair straightened within an inch of its life and her stick-straight posture. It might have been a lot at times, but seeing her was a reminder of all the good that came from her position.
She rose and walked to join him, her heels clacking lightly at the ground before she sank onto the cushion beside him and pulled him into a loose hug. Adam had overtaken Ana in height some years before, but there had been a long gap in there as he grew - like one day he was three and a half feet tall and wrapped tightly in her arms and the next he was off to Georgetown and several heads taller. She pulled away after a minute, slowly and bit-by-bit as though savoring her moments as a mother rather than a president. Her hand reached to muss his hair a moment later, and Adam ducked away instinctively before exchanging an identical grin with her.
“God, I forgot how light your hair looks in here,” she said, leaning back a little. “Almost golden.” She tilted her head as though examining him. “Nah. Still brown. But much lighter.”
“How could you forget? The photo here was in _ GQ, _the same article that first declared me the family golden boy.” At the corner of their conversation was the knowledge of where he’d inherited that hair color, as it sure as hell wasn’t from Ana. But he let the thought stay buried, patting the dirt back down with the shovel himself. Their relationship always had an absence in it, and he didn’t particularly feel like deepening it in the Oval Office.
“Ah, so that’s the one I have to blame for your big head,” she responded, reaching for a piece of fruit from the little coffee table. It was a familiar half-jest, borne from Adam’s constant contradicting confidence and imposter syndrome. Idiosyncrasies were just Adam’s style, never one to make things easy for himself. He sometimes wondered if so much of himself conflicted because he tried to walk the middle road so often, balancing his weight over all sides to minimize the damage if the rug was yanked from beneath him, like lying down on a bed of nails: a thousand tiny, dull pains over one sharp, potentially fatal puncture. She smiled again. “Is Noah doing well?”
“For Noah he is. He would barely look up from some new reports on fracking, seems hopeful he’ll be able to garner enough support.”
Ana snorted. “Good luck with that. I’ll be shocked if it reaches the floor for debate.”
“That makes three of us, then.” He nodded towards the desk. “Bad meeting?”
The frown lines on her face deepened. “Don’t get me started,” she drawled, falling back fully against the cushions. After only a moment, she _ did _ get started regardless of what Adam did or didn’t do. “We received the memo a few days ago that a delegation from Sweden wanted to be in contact, right? Fairly standard stuff, Maura gets back to them quickly because they worded it like it was an urgent matter, and there’s a back and forth for a while about scheduling and accommodations. We’re of the belief they won’t be out here until Monday at the earliest.”
Adam knit his eyebrows together. “It’s not Monday.”
“You fuckin’ tell me. Anyway, I’m halfway through a meeting with a few UN representatives when Maura has to interrupt. They arrived at the White House, claimed they had a meeting, and just…didn’t leave. Evan Maura couldn’t get through to them, which is the thing that scared me a little.”
“You should have put Calla on it.”
“Believe me, if she were here, I would’ve. But as it was, I had to hurry out the UN members to deal with decidedly more antagonistic foreign relations.”
“Why were they even here?”
“They wanted to discuss the military relationship between our countries-”
“What the hell?”
“Yeah, I don’t know,” she said, waving one hand in dismissal. “Any points they were trying to make went straight out the window when they started pulling out cue cards, to be honest. I might have to call Löfven to smooth things over.”
“Well, there’s never a dull moment,” Adam said fairly. His mother snorted.
“Sure isn’t. Anyway,” she said, glancing at her watch, “it’s now Thanksgiving, so no more meetings for twenty-four hours.”
“It’s Wednesday.”
She pulled a face in dismissal. “We take our patriotism seriously, darlin’. Don’t want our home state gettin’ too mad.”
“Of course.”
Ana checked her watch again. “The turkeys will be on their way to the Willard by now, so we’re not ruining any American traditions today.”
“Wait,” Adam said. “Where?”
She looked at him, her eyes narrowing. “The Willard. They stay there every year.”
“What? No. _ No. _You cannot give the turkeys five-star accommodations with taxpayer dollars. You’ve been doing this every year?!”
“It’s public knowledge, sugar. Every news outlet mentions it.”
“How did I not-” Adam cut off. “There is no way you can do that! They’re turkeys! It’s a waste!”
“It’s precedent, Adam. I’m not sure if there’s anything to be done at this point.”
Adam stood quickly, pacing back and forth, and his mother stood behind him. “It’s a _ blatant _waste of money, I’m shocked we haven’t already been-”
“Hon, every president so far has done the same-”
“Imagine the story if we broke the tradition! Even conservatives would have to applaud your frugality-”
“We can’t play games with tradition, you know they already call us disrespectful-”
“-we can’t be using _ taxpayer money-” _
“-by all means, if you have the time to find lodging for two forty-pound turkeys-”
“Put them in my room!” Adam blurted. His mother stopped short.
“You’re not serious,” she said. “We’re not putting the turkeys for me to pardon in your bedroom.”
“Yes, we are.”
“Adam-”
He shifted his feet, coming to a stop. He lifted himself up to his full height. Debate Captain Adam, six-time Best Delegate Adam, and First Son Adam converged into one. His mother barely looked phased.
“Oh, God,” his mother said. “I can’t listen to another sales pitch.”
“Madame President,” Adam began, “I’d like to echo the sentiments of the forebears before me-”
“Nope,” she said, making double-time back to her desk. “You’re not going to filibuster me.”
“In 2018 alone, at least forty-three articles in the Wall Street Journal accused the sitting administration of wasting tax dollars. This came on the heels of a tax increase for Americans making more than ten million dollars per year and the subsequent pushback from a more conservative electorate in Congress.”
“Fine!” Ana said, her hand falling to the desk with a thump. She brought it back up to her head to massage her temple a moment later. “I’m too tired to hear my own history read back at me. You win.”
He sat back down on the couch, crossing his legs primly. “Perfect,” he said, allowing himself to smile once again.
#trc rwrb au#rwrb au#trc#the raven cycle#pynch#pynch au#adam parrish#ronan lynch#richard gansey#richard campbell gansey iii#noah czerny#rwarb#rw&rb#the raven boys#the dream thieves#blue lily lily blue#the raven king#wip#wips#my wips
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Tender heart
Ok to rb
Cw:violence, underwater scene and food ment.
Jerico yawned stretching on the bed,her foot hits someones legs and she quickly snaps around.
Luckily wamai hasnt woken up yet.
She sighed figuring she must of have Fallen asleep while talking to him.
She couldnt quite place it,bit when talking to the kenyan Man there was something about his voice that was just so comforting, and it felt like home.
She stood up out of bed, a familiar sensation of claws appeared on her shoulder signaling that sunshine was awake.
Jeri opens the blinds, the perks of working here is that she gets a beautiful view of the sea.
Hearing the bed rustling she smiles as the Man Turned to face her still asleep.
"Cute"she thinks to herself as she walks to her closet,trying to make the smallest ammount of noise possible as to not wake up the Man.
She takes her trusty turtle neck sweater and some other clothes and pair of combat boots to then sneak out the door and walk to the showers.
She took maybe an hour in the shower,figuring by now that ngugi would be awake and gone.
Nope,hes still asleep.
Jer found it both amusing and cute, she sat besides him softly stroking his curly hair.
--hey ngugi, wake up--she said softly,the Man grunts and opens his eyes.
Her hand retreats from his hair and she smiles.
--morning--his voice is deep and raspy, he sits up stretching and making his neck pop--what hour is it?
--Its like...six am , why?
The Man quickly jumps out of bed--Ive got to go quickly! Kali is going to kick my ass if I dont get there right now
Jerico stood up giggling at the sudden informalness of wamai, putting a hand on his shoulder--First you need a shower and some food,hurry your ass up and meet me at the cafeteria--the Man stutters an excuse- ah-ah no ifs and or buts, shower and food first
She pats his chest playfully and walks outside with her eagle flying behind her.
The kenyan Man looks away and chuckles to himself, she surely was interesting.
While jerico waited for ngugi she sat there on the cafeteria with a couple of books and some paperwork.
--¿en que estamos trabajando?--(what are we working on?) She smiled at the familiar accent.
--Nada boludeces del trabajo(nothing just some silly work things).
Flores chuckles,resting his head on his hand-- tenes una pinta de cansada (you look tired)
Jeri nodded stretching-- odio tener que levantarme temprano boludo--(I hate having to wake up early dude)
He nodds in agreement, And they talk for a bit, shed laugh at his jokes and he would at hers, with the ocasional flirting in between.
Wamai however did not find this amusing as the second he entered the cafeteria he heard jeris laughs,his blood seemed to boil as he noticed who was with her.
--Im sorry but this spot Is taken--he said slamming a hand on the table.
--Hey Man--santiago said--we just talkin' a Man cant talk with his friend?
Another stern look forced the Argentine Man to leave,not before winking at jerico and patting her arm--bueno me rajan, me voy preciosa--(aight,theyre throwing me out, goodbye beautiful) he said walking away.
She giggles turning to wamai--Jeez jealous much ngugi?
Wamai sighs--My apologies I.. I dont know what took over me
Jeri shakes her head with a soft smile-- its okay, it was rather cute, but go get your food come on
After eating breakfast both went to their responsabilities.
--Bueenas!--(hello!)she said walking to Zero who was happy to see her.
--Hey, youre here what took ya so long?
She shrugged pulling her fluffy jacket closer,it was a rather windy day.
--Come here--he opened his jacket and she hid under it.
--Thanks
--Dont mention it
At one point jerico herself had to train, under her sweater was a sports top.
Now maybe it was the fact that she didnt sleep that well, maybe the fact that she had her mind in the clouds,but she was getting her ass handed to her in hand to hand combat.
This came with the sassy remarks of kali as jeri called it a day and was putting her sweater and blazer back on.
--If thats how her father trained her, I cant imagine how himself must be, a miracle he didnt die on the Battlefield
Jers hearing was somewhat supernatural, because for starters she wasnt one-hundred percent human.
She grunted trying to Keep her composture picking up her bag with sunshine perched on her shoulder.
Another sassy remark came as she Walked past jaimini--all those medals her father has? They are worthless,how did he let his daughter go into the military?, she inst built for this.
She Turned around walking to kali--the fuck you said to me?
Wamai who was running on the threadmill approached both women.
The other operators, specially smoke and mute took a look at what was happening.
--Im just saying that you and your father arent military material--jamini said-- you got your ass handed to you,If this is how the von-terras fight then its a miracle you made it this F--
She didnt finish because jerico punched her right on the nose, smoke and mute jump in keeping her from kicking kalis ass.
Wamai holds back his boss who looks at jerico in surprise.
--talking shit about me? I dont mind, but dont you ever, EVER talk about my father like that,Next time I wont be too kind,sushine nos vamos (we're leaving)
The eagle flied behind her owner, she should probably get her bloody knuckles checked,but that didnt matter at the moment.
Harry would totally hear about that fight one way or another, but that wasnt important right now.
She sat there in her Office looking at the painting of her dad and her when she was young.
How old was she?,she cant recall the exact number but she does remember that painting.
She smiled as the sunrays hit the painting.
--i hope im not interrupting anything-- Zero said.
--Not at all Sam, what happened?
The Man sat infront of her--Harry got Word of what happened during training, hes letting this one pass because you were justified, he'll talk with kali and he recomended you take the Next two days off
--And you came all this way for that?
Fisher stood up and Walked over to her giving her a quick hug.
She hugged back--Thanks..I really needed it
--And another thing, youre Burning up
Jer nodds lifting her hands from her desk in order to not literally set it ablaze.
The only three people that knew about jericos "identity" were Harry,Sam and ash.
She did as she was told and at night she went for a swim in the beach.
The water sizzled as she entered all the rage dissipated in the water as she quietly sings to herself.
She felt a pair of arms hugging her from behind--may I join you?
She chuckled and softly elbowed wamai on the stomach --Yeah you May
Both talk quietly,trying to avoid the topic of todays fight, even then they were still Friends.
--Hey wanna see something cool?--She asked
--uh...sure?
--follow me!-- she dived under the water and he did the same, they were far off the shore, walking on the sand.
Wamai was puzzled at the fact that she wasnt holding her breath but rather...breathing underwater.
Its the same thing that always catched his attention, she seemed to be super human almost
Hes about to say something but then a soft glow catched his attention what ngugi saw he couldnt Belive.
Massive fishes of every color,they glowed Giant octopi casually swiming above them.
And a song, he couldnt hear the words,but It came from the sea, he felt the beat in his whole body, as if the Ocean was speaking to him
Jerico let him walk around the fish for a bit, finding the cuteness of his Curiosity endearing.
But eventually they had to leave.
They Swim back to the shore.
--Wasnt that cool?
--How did you knew about that? How come i never saw any of that while diving?
Jer giggled putting a hand on his shoulder--Sometimes things dont want to be seen
She offered her hand and he took it walking close to her with her head on his shoulder..
They arrived to the dormitories--And...wamai one thing..
--Yeah?
--Nor kali, or anyone can know about what you saw, got it?
He nodded, and softly stopped jerico from leaving, taking her hand--Thanks for showing me that...its nothing like I ever seen..
He took some steps forward, and so did she.
He leaned in and she did the same.
Jerico cups his cheeks and kisses him, he kissed back tilting his head, leaning a bit.
They press their foreheads togheter.
--Ill see you later then?
He nodds kissing her again--sweet dreams jerico
--Sweet dreams ngugi
When she got to her room she collapsed on the bed sighing like a fool in love.
Sunshine curled besides her,looking at her owner with a smug smile.
Jer rolled her eyes softly passing out minutes after.
#tw//violence#tw:violence#thalasophobia cw#cw thalassophobia#food ment#ngugi/wamai#💙me traes loco💙#sam/zero#🦉💙shot straight to my heart💙🦉
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Drunk | rb
You were out with the boys to celebrate their new album release. You sat at the bar whilst your boyfriend, Reece talked to his managers. “You look like you’d like one of these.” The bartender passed you a drink.
“What is it?”
“Just drink it. It’s on the house.” He smiled. You sniffed the drink. It smelled like a vodka with coke. You drank the whole glass and looked down to see a replacement. You drank that one too and before you knew it you were drunk out of your mind.
Reece peered over at you swaying your head with a stupidly wide smile and chuckled to himself. “I think y/n has had a bit too much to drink. I should probably take her home.” He told the men he was talking to.
He walked over to you and helped you stand up. “Come on-“
“No!” You slurred. “I have a boyfriend. Get off of me.”
“Y/n, I am your boyfriend.” He laughed. You looked at him.
“Oh.” You cocked your head to the side.
“Come on, darling. Let’s get you home.” He held up your weight as you walked so you wouldn’t fall over.
“Good luck, mate.” Blake laughed. “She’s going to feel like shit in the morning.”
“Bye, y/n. Thanks for coming.” George tried to hug her.
“No! I have a boyfriend stooooop.” You pushed him away. He stifled a laugh.
“Y/n. I’m one of your best friends. I’m allowed to hug you.” George laughed.
“Sorry, mate.” Reece apologised. “Our uber is here.”
Once you got back to your shared flat, he picked you up and carried you to the bed. He took your shoes off and unzipped your dress. “Nooo... nooo Reece...” You whimpered, your words slurring together. “I don’t wanna have sex right now.” You were so out of it you could barely get all the words out. “Please don’t-“
“No, no, no, darling! I would never. I would never take advantage of you like that. I’m just getting you into your pyjamas. Is that okay?” He rushed out. You nodded. He slipped your dress off and gently took off your bra. He slid one of his tee shirts on you with a new pair of underwear. He tucked you into the duvet and walked over to the bathroom.
“Reece don’t leave me!” You cried. He rushed back to the bed with your makeup wipes in his hand.
“Baby I’m not going anywhere.” He sat on the edge of the bed and took out a wipe. He peeled off your false eyelashes and began to gently wipe your makeup off.
“My boyfriend is really really fittt.” You mumbled. “I love him so much. His name is Reece bibby. Do you know him?” You slurred.
“Erm... I think I know him, yeah.” Reece chuckled as he successfully wiped your eyeliner off.
“Except there’s one thing I don’t like.”
“Yeah?” He grew nervous.
“He’s never here. I only like when he’s here.”
“Aw, baby, you know I try my best to be here for you as much as I can.” His heart melted. “I love you so much.” He leaned down and kissed you. He threw away the makeup wipes he used and turned the lights off before he changed out of his clothes and got into bed next to you. He noticed your heavy breathing and light snores and smiled to himself as he drifted off to sleep.
The next morning, you woke up and immediately grabbed the water on your night stand, popping the pill next to it in your mouth. “Good morning darling.” Reece walked back in, sitting on the bed next to you. He rubbed your shoulders and kissed the back of your neck. “Feeling okay?”
“No. I feel awful.” You groaned. “Please tell me you didn’t have to leave early last night for me.” You looked back at him. He nodded sheepishly. “I’m so sorry Reece. I ruined your party.”
“No, no, baby, it’s alright. I was really tired anyway. It’s fine. Plus you were really funny last night.” He let out a giggle.
“Oh no what did I say?” You worried.
“First you wouldn’t let George hug you because you have a boyfriend.” He laughed. “Then you were telling me how fit I am and how you hate it when I always leave.” He told you. “You were also kind of scared when I started to undress you but you were happy when I changed you right into your favourite pyjamas. I can’t understand how some lads can just take advantage of someone like that. I just wanted to let my beautiful girl go to sleep.” He kissed your cheek.
“Thank you for taking care of me Reece.” You grinned.
“It’s what I’m here for, y/n.” He kissed you.
#nhc#nhc imagine#new hope club imagine#new hope club#reece bibby#george smith#blake richardson#imagines
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Mistaken Chapter Six
IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO BE ADDED TO THE TAGLIST DROP ME AN ASK
please like and rb/comment <3
Word Count: 2721 (this actually comprises chapters 7 and 8 on Ao3)
THERE ARE NO ENDGAME SPOILERS, THIS IS A DELAYED UPLOAD FROM AO3
Fic Summary: Peter Parker has been given the responsibility of bringing in a new recruit. Now, as an adult, he realizes that none of the trashy YA novels he read in high school could have prepared him for this. There was a storm on the horizon, and all they could do from the Tower is watch.
Chapter Summary: it... it is a thing. Good luck friends lol
Warnings: smut and language and that’s probably it. mentions of death and gun violence probably, it’s been a while since I wrote this
Chapter One Chapter Two Chapter Three Chapter Four Chapter Five
We sat, assessing one another and picking at our plates of food, more for something to do with our hands, as opposed to nothing at all. In those moments I could just read in his body language the fact that he had put two and two together and remembered why I looked so familiar. He had been responsible for training my sister when she failed on missions, whereas I had never had to face the wrath of the Winter Soldier and his handlers. For a year or so after we escaped, my sister and I saw his face in every passing stranger, terrified Hydra was coming back to reclaim us.
Because to Hydra, we weren’t members of a team, as they had initially led my sister and I to believe. We were their property, attack dogs trained to be set loose every once in a while. Caged, every other time. I let my fork clatter to the table before folding my fingers underneath my chin to support my head as I stared at the man across from me.
Barnes followed suit, pushing his plate away and leaning back in his chair. His ice blue eyes flashed to mine before he took a sharp breath in and out and then spoke for the first time since he’d walked through my door just under an hour ago.
“So, were you sent here to bring me in? Wanda doesn’t seem to think so but I’ve known Hydra for a few more decades than she has, so I’m warier.” Simple and to the point. Disciplined even, to any onlookers there might have been. But, as a fellow survivor of Hydra saw all his tells, the brightness of his eyes, the clenched teeth and slightly hunched shoulders. I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that he wasn’t fully seated either, prepared to spring up at any moment, despite his look of nonchalance.
“You should trust Wanda more. No, soldat, I didn’t come to bring you in. You know,” I said, chuckling drily, “I thought this conversation was going to happen years ago but in reverse. Did no one from Hydra come looking for us? Before they went under? Or were Nadia and I just new playthings for you and yours?” I asked, ice coating my harsh tone.
Bucky flinched at my use of Russian and again at the name of my sister. So he did remember us. Somehow, that didn’t make me feel any better about his presence here.
“Our superiors were… rather distracted by certain developments and felt that you all would return to your homes. I guess their arrogance finally got the better of them in that regard. And then, with the new threat of Thor, Steve and Tony and the convergence of the Avengers on the world scale, they more than likely shoved your files deep down. Though I’d imagine your recent resurfacing has been noted by rogue Hydra factions that are still operating around the globe.”
A solid enough explanation for why no one had come for Nadia and I. Another thing I had to thank the Avengers for, I supposed. “So, what happens now? Wanda has seen all she needed to see to support me. Where will the others fall in line?”
He shifted uncomfortably in his seat, leaning forward so his elbows rested on the table. “Steve believes Wanda and is willing to work with you. Same goes for Natasha and Clint and the Maximoffs. Tony… well, he may get over this sooner than he did before but I wouldn’t count on it. We still haven’t figured our shit out, though I was the one who killed his parents in person. But I didn’t do it in my right mind. That’s the difference between the two of us I suppose.”
I laughed, darkly at first before it rapidly became hysterical, but I managed to keep a handle on the powers inside of me. “You really think I was in my right mind Barnes? After years of the torture and abuse I suffered at the hands of my parents to then be rescued and groomed by an evil organization when I was barely twelve? Not even close. But by the time I realized what Hydra really was, it was too late. They weren’t letting us go, not without exacting a terrible price.”
Barnes sighed and looked back at me, eyes softening almost imperceptibly. “You did come here willingly. And you show no ill intent, despite your obvious penchant for self-destructive tendencies.” I couldn’t exactly disagree. “I think you’ll find that you’ll fit right in with this merry little band of superpowered misfits. We’re all a little broken here.”
Nodding, I pushed back my chair and stood up, grabbing my plate to dump its contents into the trash can when Barnes spoke again. “You’re not on lockdown anymore. I would advise against leaving the Tower, but this is your home now. Not a prison. And we’d like for you to treat it that way. Just… maybe avoid tony for a little while.”
Yeah, easy enough when you live a few doors away from the guy. But, Barnes did have a point. He stood and moved to the door and wished me goodnight before slipping through the door without a backward glance.
I tossed and turned that night, but not due to overwhelming nightmares, which was a welcome change of pace. No, my skin itched and my brain raced, looking for something to hold on to, looking for any sort of distraction. My body begged me to take action, to do something. After days of being laid up, even just a simple jog sounded like it would hit the spot for my restless limbs.
I gave in at around two in the morning, throwing on my leggings, slick work out short and tennis shoes before pulling my hair back. Then I was out the door and down to the rec level of the Tower, which was like a carnival for enhanced people.
For the first hour, I thought I was alone as I ran a few miles, lifted so small-ish weights and completed over a hundred sit-ups, which isn’t a lot, but it wasn’t half bad for a warm up. It wasn’t until I was shadow boxing that I realized I wasn’t alone. I felt a rapturous presence behind me and to the left. So I spun quickly and jabbed at the face of the intruder, only to punch… two feet?
“Hey, don’t you know it’s rude to touch someone else’s feet without consent. Could sue you for harassing me, you know.”
Parker. Spidey, it seemed, had decided to literally hang out behind me, upside down, suspended from the ceiling. “What do you want Buggy?” I asked as if nothing had transpired between us over the past few, very eventful dates.
“Sometimes I just hang around here at night. Calms me down, plus the ceilings are high enough that I can practice some more… out of the box acrobatics without embarrassing myself and ending up on the front page of the Daily Bugle again. You know how they are.” I did actually. Their constant tirade against Spider-Man was one of the few things that actually made me laugh out loud.
But I totally understood the need for peace and quiet and to kind of get rid of the riff-raff. So I smiled brightly and asked Buggy if he could show me how exactly he managed to get that tensile strength in the material he used for his webs.
To say Peter was like a toddler around science would be an understatement. But it made us both happy. So we went, the past firmly behind us.
Peter and I spent the rest of the night in the labs. Mostly, it was just Peter demonstrating how each of his projects worked, like the changes he was making to his web formula and improvements he was making to his suit to change the way he could interface with his A.I. Karen.
Sometime later, as the sun was sluggishly rising, FRIDAY gently (for an AI) reminded Peter and me that now would be the only time to shower, eat and dress before training commenced for the day. At the reminder, Peter simply grimaced, and I returned the expression. What was waiting for me down on the common floor couldn’t possibly be good. Peter pushed down the sleeves of his sweatshirt nervously and gestured for me to follow him as he stepped into the elevator.
Down on the common floor, everyone was nursing their own cup of coffee, steam billowing into their faces. Well, everyone except Thor. He had a beer stein full of chocolate milk that he nearly chugged as he giddily bounced up and down in his seat, the godly equivalent of a toddler and golden retriever wrapped in one muscly package of happiness and positivity.
Without a word, Pietro handed Peter and I both our own coffees. Mine was an iced cold brew. Some deep, nearly dead part of me was touched that he remembered my disdain for hot, weak drinks. He winked at me as he turned back to return to his spot next to the fridge, but not before swiping another donut from the breakfast bar. Something must have happened before Peter and I arrived because Clint and Sam both glared daggers at Pietro.
“So...” I began, “we going to talk about the elephant in the room or ignite it until we hit the training rooms and punch it out?”
Steve and Wanda looked up sharply from the food in front of them, taking not so sneaky glances at the others. Tony was gripping his coffee mug so hard, if he’d been anyone else in the room, it would have shattered. Sam just looked weary and Bucky... he was leaning up against the sink, arms crossed over his chest. He almost looked disappointed.
“Punching it out seems to be the winner. If you have a problem with me or need questions answered, you know how to get them. Beyond that, I’m not leaving so don’t even try.” I began choking up out of nowhere. “I’m not letting those bastards take another home from me. You all have always been nothing but kind and I treated that kindness with deception and indifference. But I’m going to blame that on the whole, kindness being a completely new experience for me. Obviously, I mean everyone here no harm...” I petered off, not knowing what to say to get my feelings across. I looked around, lost, capturing the gazes of Pietro and Bucky, who both just nodded back at me.
Bucky pushed off of the counter and approached me, laying a hand on my shoulder. “Kaida is no more Hydra than I am. If you trust in me, be open to trusting her. We’ve all... made mistakes.”
Yeah, that’s one way to put it.
Even Thor looked uncomfortable at this point and Tony was just straight up heading for the elevator without a backward glance. Bruce trailed after him, shrugging apologetically. Seconds that felt like hours passed and finally, the elevator began to descend to the lab floors.
“Alright team, move out. We have work to do,” Steve said in his most Captain-y voice. And damn if it wasn’t kind of hot. I wasn’t the only one who thought so. I could tell just from the shift from light blue to icy gray in Bucky’s eyes that he was going to be pulling Rogers into his room later. Or sooner, depending on how tight his shirt was today
Hours and buckets of sweat later and the whole team broke for lunch. As expected, no one took me up on my offer but we still weren’t pre-incident buddies anymore. Bucky and Pietro seemed most inclined to stick by my side while Wanda was off with Vision. Peter gave me these weird agonizing glances from across the main training floor the whole time. The kid was weird. Who knows what he got up to in his own brain.
Anyways, I knew what I had to do as soon as I stepped on to the elevator, moments after everyone else left to the cafeteria area. There was a confrontation that was way overdue.
As soon as I stepped out on to the slightly grimy linoleum floor of the lab, Bruce looked up and blanched before quickly shoving his papers and laptop into a satchel and bounding for the elevator before it closed behind me.
“Good luck,” he muttered shakily. I nodded in thanks and a moment later he was gone. A quick look around told me that Tony must be in a back room somewhere, probably grabbing parts. In the background, Black Sabbath tinkled through the inlaid speaker system.
“Brucey, darling, do you want to go with blue or green for the new nanotech in Veronica?? Or maybe purple, unless that would be too on the no-.” He quickly cut himself off as he came waltzing around the corner of desks and displays to see me perched on his stool.
“Get out,” he growled, standing stock still, shoulders tense. When I didn’t move, he did, reaching for the minibar he had installed on the wall opposite me, pulling out a bottle of scotch and taking a swig.
“Well if it’s going to be that kind of party...” I drawled darkly before reaching down into my gym bag and pulling out my flask of bourbon and followed suit. Tony didn’t exactly roll out the welcome wagon after that but he did seem to relax a bit. At the very least, he didn’t summon what was left of the Iron Legion protocol to physically remove me from his presence.
“Why are you here Kaida?” Tony finally asked, ice coating his words as they pierced into me in ways I wasn’t expecting.
“Is it so odd for a former assassin to check up on her friends? I mean, it would be a shame to just throw everything away for a simple misunderstanding right? At the very least we have to work and live together. Unless you intend to kick me out?” I stared Tony down, waiting for that explosive anger that I knew he was trying to shove deep down.
“Oh Kaida, we were never friends. We fucked. But I’d fuck anything with two legs and a rack. I think you know that as well as I do. The only reason I ever gave up that life was Pepper and, well, you know exactly how that turned out.”
“Again, not my doing. I was long gone by the time someone executed the hit they had on her.”
“But you knew and you did nothing. Warned no one. You know, it’s not like I’m hard to find. A literal skyscraper that used to have my name on it not stand out to you?”
“I-,” I began, searching for any explanation for my inaction. As terrible as it was to admit, I’d simply never considered interfering with Hydras plans. I was much more concerned with keeping my sister and myself alive at the time.
“You know,” Tony said, interrupting my frantic, guilty train of thought, “some kid once told me that when you have the powers and abilities that we do and do nothing, then the bad things that happen, they happen because of you. Maybe you should chew on that for a little while Kaida. I won’t kick you out but I don’t want to see your face around my space for a long while.”
And then, like a switch flipped in my body, hot rage filled me. What did this entitled, rich snob know about being a kid my age and seeing the shit I’d seen? When he was my age he was partying every night and wrecking Bentley’s and Aston Martin’s like it was nothing, like nothing mattered to him at all.
“Maybe you should grow a pair then Stark. You’re really angry, huh? Prove it. Fight me. Kick me out. We both know I can take it. You saw the bruises when I first moved in. Couldn’t be missed with that lack of clothing when we first got acquainted. Do your worst.”
Suddenly he was in my face again, hatred and something else raged in his eyes. Maybe not hatred at me, but at the reaction, I could always weasel out of him. Had been doing for my past few weeks at the Tower.
Stark slammed his bottle down on the desk right beside me before wrapping his hand through the hair at the back of my hair hard, twisting and pulling me forward before viciously kissing and biting my neck. It was painful but not in a way that made me inclined to push him away.
“God I hate you so much,” he said and he ripped my shirt up and over my head before taking a step back.
“Wanna be useful? Turn around and bend over the desk, hands behind your back. And don’t move a muscle.”
I did as he said, breath coming out in gasps.
Oh, this was bad.
Really bad.
Or maybe really good.
TAGLIST: @peeterparkr @laurfangirl424 @private-bucky-barnes
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Meme Trip 2k19, Pt. 3
Date: May 21st
Park: Six Flags Great America in Gurnee, Illinois
One of the most surreal things about doing these trips after being a homebound and family-locked coaster geek for many years is actually getting out there. I’ve heard of so many of these parks. I’ve seen pictures, read ride reviews, know at least a little something about something in them, and so on. I’m used to knowing factually, but not knowing by experience. You can read a book on how to be a good nurse all day long, but it’ll never prepare you for being in the hospital. Similarly, you can read all about these parks, but it won’t ever prepare you for walking into these places that only existed in your life before as a concept.
One such place was Six Flags Great America. I’d never paid too much mind to them outside of some vague knowledge about them—Raging Bull was the second B&M hyper, Batman was the very first B&M invert, I remembered X-Flight and Goliath’s announcements to some degree, and say, aren’t they getting a new coaster next year?
Then November happened, and I’ll spare you the details but my coo-coo bananas ass really did not like GAM after that. Like Holiday World, it was one of the parks I heavily considered asking Casie to skip. For months, the only coaster there I really gave a shit about was Goliath, and I think that that was originally only because I loved the character of Giorgos so much!
But, I knew that in order to be better, I had to do some stuff I wasn’t 100% comfortable with. I’d faced down ground zero in Indiana and thrived, had a lot of fun with Nelly in the process, and found closure. Now it was time to get closure about that trip, to surrender to the fact I’ll never know what happened and I’m relegated to trusting what I was told.
We pulled up to the park early that morning, the wind biting and cold. I could never live this far north. I shivered and pulled my arms tighter in my hoodie. At least Goliath is here. At least I’m going to get some credits to my roster. It’s just one day, try to keep an open mind! It may not be too bad. It may be like HoWo. Oryche may be here later on too. Early Entry only granted us 10 minutes, and our Six Flags day began.
Superman- Ultimate Flight is a B&M flyer, a model I’m not incredibly fond of. I’ve done 2 of these now, and I still don’t really care for them. This one is better than the one in New Jersey by a small margin, but as a woman with boobs, I don’t care for flying coasters. I’m glad we got this one out of the way early on. Similarly, The Dark Knight’s a wild mouse. There’s not much to say. I’m glad the horn on the train isn’t as loud as GADV’s, since I hate super loud noises. It was fun to shout out “We live in a society!” but it’s ultimately a pretty forgettable ride.
I can’t remember if I said my piece on Joker at Great Adventure, but I’m not a huge fan of these free-spin clones. They’re weird, and I know their gimmick makes them very marketable. However, after doing Lightning Run and realizing these coasters cost the same as that did, I’m even less fond of them. Really, guys? Both are capacity nightmares, but at least Lightning Run is actually a lot of fun. Got the credit, pass, never gonna do that again.
There’s not a whole lot to V2: Vertical Velocity either. It’s an Intamin Impulse, basically the same experience as Possessed at Dorney from last year. It’s a little shakier than Possessed is, and I seriously hurt my foot jumping down from the seats. (Short enthusiast problems.) Still, it’s a fun coaster for what it’s worth. I’m fond of these types of rides, and I’ll be sad when this inevitably does go.
Batman admittedly had always held a shred of an interest for me because of my giant bias towards B&M’s inverted coasters. Being the first of the kind was at least a slight draw to the park for me, and I’m happy to say it didn’t disappoint me. I rode it twice, and I oddly enough prefer it in the back. I’m usually a Front-Row Purist for inverts. The queue is immersive for a Six Flags, and the recording of the laughing kids as you exit gave me hardcore heebie-jeebies. The loop should absolutely not be that tight, and I love it. Somewhat of a recurring theme, but the I prefer the clones here over the ones at GADV. This Batman crushes the one in Jersey.
Little Dipper and Sprocket Rocket are two very cute kiddie coasters. I think Dipper is my favorite of the two, even without the really heartwarming story about Six Flags saving its life. They’re both super-fun rides for baby enthusiasts to cut their teeth on, and I’m glad they’ve got both of them in their lineup. Nice work!
American Eagle was fun. This was the ride a lot of people asked me about while I was in the park, and I kept describing it as “Racer from KI with a better layout and not possessed by Satan.” My first ride was lackluster because of a misunderstanding in the queue, but when Oryche and I went back to ride it, I got to really appreciate AE for what it is. What it is is very good and very fun. While only blue side was running, it was a blast. I can’t imagine what both of the trains going at the same time would be like! The helix is a laugh riot and those first few hills give you some solid, strong floater. Shoutout to the kids behind O and I screaming out “Fuck bitches, get money” the entire ride. Whoever they were, I hope they’re having the best summer of their young lives.
Demon is surprisingly not bad at all. Most of the Arrow loopers I’ve done have been lackluster, sans Nessie and TNT. I didn’t have very high expectations for Demon, to be fair, but I ended up really enjoying myself on it more than I figured I would. The tunnel effects were nice, especially the second one that felt almost like a head chopper. The corkscrews are a little rough, but not unbearable. It’s a solid ride that I hope is around in the park for years to come! Good going, Demon. Even if I hurt my arm trying to get into your trains.
Viper is neat in that it was a coaster built in-house a la Beast or Twister, and that we share a birth year. It was better than I anticipated it to be (bear in mind, my expectations for this park were incredibly low), but I prefer the other two wooden coasters in the park to it. By no means is Viper a bad ride, my worst experience was hurting my ankle while getting out of the train, but there are just other rides in the park I like more. I think I might also be a little less keen on Viper because we modeled his personification after someone I dislike who is also a snake in the grass. Haha.
X-Flight sucks. I knew it was going to be Not Great, but I didn’t think it was going to be that bad. I’ve always kind of laughed at enthusiasts who whine and bitch about “omggg b&m rattle wahhh!” But guys… X-Flight actually has a rattle, and it’s awful. I felt like I was riding a jackhammer on this ride. I’m sure it was a lot more fun in its early years, but now that the wings are almost literally flapping, I’ll pass. I’m usually a little kinder on winged coasters than most other enthusiasts, but this is pretty awful. It’s the only ride in this park I actively dislike.
We also hit a few flats. Mardi Gras Hangover was not a credit, but it also just kind of exists. Fiddler’s Fling was a lot of fun, since I like spinning flats [but not spinning coasters, funnily enough.] Oryche and I got incredibly close on FF, but we were both good sports about it. It’s Six Flags, it happens. Chubasco is also a blast with friends, and we were screaming “RMC WHO? I ONLY KNOW DADDY CHUBASCO. ALAN SCHILKE IS QUAKING” the entire time. Irony is funny, guys! Really! It doesn’t hurt that the centerpiece of the ride really looks like a giant bong at some points.
I was a bit anxious about Raging Bull going into the trip. Casie told me again and again that because I’m not too keen on 232 at my home park, I “probably won’t like Bull either.” I think we were both pleased to say that was not the case! I actually enjoyed RB a lot, to the point I really wonder why on earth enthusiasts dislike it. (Or rather, I would if I didn’t already know they dickride Steve and thus are stupid as all fuck.)
No, the layout isn’t as focused on that tasty graceful floater B&M does so well. But it’s unique, and as you can tell by my adoration of LRun, I heavily support individuality in rides. Give me those low-to-the-ground twists over a helix and some bunny hops. I dig it! The trims were about as bad as Diamondback’s, which is to say noticeable but definitely not enough to hurt the ride experience. Oryche and I also got a trimless Bull ride, which slapped.
Again, B&M hypers are like going to a new restaurant and ordering the chicken strips. You can’t majorly fuck up chicken strips. You’re gonna enjoy what you get. Bull is spicy chicken strips. Still chicken, but with a new twist on the same ol’ same ol’. I like it. I only rode twice, but I can’t wait to ride more to see if it holds up or if she was just having a particularly good day. Yee-haw.
And now it’s time to talk about the elephant in the room. Over the last year, RMC has left a very unpleasant taste in my mouth because of Steve. I’ve enjoyed the other 3--- WiCy and TwiTim are wonderful rides and LRod is nothing short of fantastic--- but SV made me think twice about the company. I incredibly hate how they’re treated as if they can do no wrong within the community. I used to hype them up when my only experience with them was LRod, but after SV, my love for them died in a fiery car crash. Wicked and Timbers helped me realize Steve was most likely a glitch, but the damage was done already. I’d never be hype-hyped for an RMC again.
The only park I’d visited thus far where the RMC was my favorite in the lineup was Dollywood. Not Kings Dominion, not SFNE, not Kentucky Kingdom, and most certainly not Cedar Point. Great America is one of the rare parks where the RMC is my favorite in the roster.
Remember when I said there’s only one coaster with a first drop I might like more than Lightning Run? It’s Goliath. It may have been because I didn’t eat very much that day [only a coffee and a donut at Dunkin in the morning and a tiny bag of Takis during the day], but I was graying out at the bottom of the drop consistently. And the hangtime is sinfully good, it puts Copperhead’s to shame.
Yes, it’s short. But I like when RMC is short and packs a punch rather than being long, drawn-out, and having unnecessary MCBRs. I’m trying to keep my salt to a minimum, but it’s very hard to not. Goliath is not a long ride, and that’s a complaint I understand. But when you are riding it, it does the elements it has very, very well. I like Goliath. You guys are just mean. I marathoned this and lost count of how many rides I got, but Oryche said we racked up at least 12.
Also, funny story: Oryche and I were trying to re-ride, but my restraint kept locking back into place. I joked to the ride operator that “It must not want me to go!” She laughed and said that “Goliath picks people he likes.” He likes me as much as I like him. I will defend you, Giorgos, you glorious dumbass.
Overall, I liked GAM a hell of a lot more than I expected myself to. I do think I’d probably let my bitterness override my preconceived notions on the park, but it led to me being overwhelmingly happy with how good it actually is. It’s laid out very well, and it’s clean and honestly really beautiful. It’s like New England, just on a much larger scale and with a lineup that doesn’t need to rely on the top 2 because everything sans X-Flight is decent at the worst. Honestly, it’s probably my favorite Six Flags thus far. Those are words I never thought I would say, and I’m excited to come back and get Whizzer and Maxx Force whenever the winds blow us back into Chicago.
Until next time, you shirtless Greek horndog.
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Anons 7x06
Lots of anons in my inbox, a few under the cut. The tone of most asks is not complimentary towards the season or episode, you have been warned.
Anonymous said:Seems like there must not be a lot of Regina fans out there, despite the ER making a lot of noise. Demos held steady.
I wouldn’t count those numbers before they’re hatched. Sound like the show was preempted in certain markets (Boston, a huge DMA, for one) so the numbers should be adjusted for that when the nationals come out on Monday. Right now OUAT is getting credit for whatever replacement programming the affiliate put in it’s place.
Anonymous said:I'm seeing that for some areas the episode got pushed back till early Saturday morning. Do they take into account when figuring out the ratings? I'm already seeing ERs complaining about it and saying if the ratings are bad that's the only reason why. 😒
See above. The overnights (today's ratings) include viewership for whatever aired in OUAT’s place. Monday they should adjust to reflect more accurately how many people watched the actual episode. They are right, though, in it negatively impacting the live numbers. However, it shouldn't really impact the L+3 or L+7 numbers.
Anonymous said:Is it bad that I laughed outloud when I saw that Regina gave everything Ivy she needed to cast her curse? Just like the time Regina pushed Lily too far and she turned into a dragon and endanger the town? Or the time she told Zelena to go after Hades and change him and refused to listen to anyone's concerns and everyone almost ended up trapped in Hell? I'm surprised the writer's still don't see the pattern like fans do.
Even without malicious intentions, she’s a disaster who ruins everyone’s lives. It’s bizarre that the writers continually follow the pattern, but never have Regina question her own judgement when she’s doing it. Whatever else happens, Regina makes emotional, unilateral decisions that usually end up biting other people in the ass.
Anonymous said:Why would Regina stop henry for having a tlk with jacinda to break the curse? they don't have chemistry but they have been written as tl, at least make them kiss to destroy this stupid season one for all
Because Ivy did something, that Regina remembers, that will put the people that Regina “loves” in jeopardy if the curse is broken. We don’t know who is in jeopardy or how.
Anonymous said:So the reboot it's all Regina's fault? Why am I not surprised? Having Henry all for her and without snowing and captain swan, obviously a villain like her was behind this
Regina isn’t being purposefully villainous, but her stupid choices have landed them in this position.
Anonymous said:So regina thought she never adopted a child and its now forced to live with him not knowing her and can't break the curse?? Also her soulmate still dead and she is away from sb and her "family"&"friends"? Hahahahahaha karma is a beautiful thing!!! So she is alone and miserable and childless? Jefferson, snowing of the early seasons and the whole ef1 is laughing and partying
I suppose she is getting a little bit of karmic retribution, but I wouldn’t consider her knowing Henry is her adult son, and still being close to him even though he doesn't know, as quite the same thing as orphaning Emma and Snowing missing out on raising her or knowing her for 28 years.
Anonymous said:Its weird since I thought Shoe Believer had an okay start in the beginning. It wasn't anywhere near CS or Snowing but they were still okay. With every episode they just feel more and more dull and forced.
I always thought it was forced, particularly in the pilot, but I thought it might grow as the season progressed. I’m not feeling it. They are telling us it’s true love, not showing us. Unlike CS, Snowing or RB where we saw those relationships develop over time, this feels completely unearned, and a TLK would be like Zades or Red Warrior where it feels like complete out-of-nowhere nonsense. CS had to go through multiple seasons of trials and tribulations, both proving they would go to the end of the world or time for one another, before the show would even whisper True Love at them. The writers have lost their mojo when it comes to writing a love story.
Anonymous said:After this weeks episode I'm more thankful than ever that Regina is far away from Captain Swan and everyone in storybrooke. They don't need to suffer the consequences of someone who has failed as a queen and a mayor.
Honestly, it being canon that Regina and Rumple are out of Storybrooke, is the silver lining to S7.
Anonymous said:I’m kind of confused , since 7x02 I’ve been trying to keep up with show . But I haven’t been paying that much attention ( I usually just put it on the tv while I’m on my computer or something, so it’s really just background noise ) but I do have a question, who is that hag in lady tremaine’s basement thing ? And also ..... can you list the people who are aware that there was a curse / who’s now awake . Cuz I can’t keep up
That’s the witch. Right now I think the only characters awake are Ivy, Regina, and sometimes Alice when she isn’t on medication. I could be wrong though, because my ability to stay focused during this show has not been great.
Anonymous said:I stopped watching s7 after 7x02 but as someone who still watches it/keeps tabs on it do you know if the timeline is explained like now that Lucy is born and is 10 years old does that mean captain swan's child is around that age or is Emma still pregnant cause time moves differently?
They haven’t really answered that question yet as far as I know. My gut is that very little time has passed in Storybrooke and as we speak Captain Swan is preparing for their baby. But that’s my gut, not fact.
Anonymous said:I'm so mad - this was the last drop for me with this show. I have been watching S7 for Colin (I'm a Nielsen family and my viewing does count for the ratings) but what they had Henry say last night was the last straw. Swan Believer and their amazing dynamic in season 1 was what kept me watching the show (until CS came along ) and to have to see the writers IGNORE what was once the backbone of the original show (Emma/Henry) to prop an abusive mother/son relationship is absolute bullshit.
cont - previous ask about Swan Believer. I feel sorry for Colin and for the cast and crew, but from now on I will not be watching the show anymore. Nothing about it excites me/makes me happy. It feels like a chore. And these writers do NOT deserve to get renewed nor to get anymore chances to ruin their own canon of what was once a beautiful show.
Describing it as a chore is pretty spot on. I understand you wanting to watch for Colin (especially as a Nielsen household) but you gotta do what’s right for you. That line seemed completely unnecessary. There were a lot of ways they could have had a nice mother/son moment without going there.
Anonymous said:I just saw a gifset of Regina waking up from the curse. So that's really the reaction she chose to go with? She really hasn't seemed to grasp the subtleties of acting, has she?
No, she has not. However, I have to say that Lana’s acting as Roni in Hyperion Heights this episode was the least of the episode’s problems.
Anonymous said:Did you see any of Lana's answers to her fans on Twitter? Besides laughing at the idea of her wanting to do a remake of Silence of the Lambs and play Clarice, when she was asked what she's learned from Bex she said that red heads have more fun than blondes. I imagine in this situation you answer these questions quickly and don't contemplate on your answers, but wow did that seem like a dig. And if you look through the comments all of her rabid fans seemed to think so too and were loving it.
I thought a more accurate tweet would have been “Red heads kiss my ass better than blondes." ‘Cause Bex has had her lips permanently affixed to her ass for years now, just the way Lana likes it.
Anonymous said:I'm indifferent about Wish Hook, and I wouldn't mind if his daughter was Alice and they got a storyline together, but they got nowhere in this episode? And going by the promo, the mess of the wish realm strikes again as Wish Hook was realm-traveling apparently. How did a non-wish Rapunzel from a separate realm come across someone who didn't exist until present-day 6x10? This is unexplainable.
Do we know that Rapunzel is from a separate realm and not from the Wish Realm? It would be unbelievable to think that WishHook left the WISHAU before it was created with EQ’s “wish” in 6x10. I think looking for any sort of logic or even in-universe fairy tale logic to make sense of anything to do with the WishRealm, including WishHook, is an exercise in futility.
It simply doesn’t make sense, and each episodes they change the rules to accommodate anything they want to do. Of course I think it’s nonsense, but I’d still rather this and have CS safely tucked away from this ridiculous season, than have them using the real Hook this season. Because honestly I don’t care about the integrity of the storytelling in S7, I only care about CS. (though that doesn’t stop me from poking fun at it.)
Anonymous said:I honestly was not one bit surprised when Colin said he was still under contract this season, but at the same time I do believe he enjoys playing this character and I'm sure he feels loyal to the show, it has been his big break. But I have to believe with the storylines and the material he's given, if not already, then by the end of filming he'll probably be in the same mind frame as Bobby. 100% only there for a paycheck. I just hope his agent is actively seeking better opportunities for him.
We really don’t know what he’s thinking or feeling, but low ratings have got to affect things on set in some way, so it sucks if he’s in any kind of stressful environment. Even if it’s just them getting pressured to send out scripted PR tweets for each episode. On the upside, other than 7x02, he’s been in these eps so rarely, that I’d guess he’s not working more than 1-2 days per episode, which probably means a lot of time that he can be home with his family and newborn. It might be a blessing for them right now. As I said we can’t know, but I just wish the best for him and his future career.
Anonymous said:Was there something wrong with the Rogers' scenes? I thought they were pretty decent, especially his interactions with Alice.
To all my anons wanting to know about Rogers scenes, you’ll have to come off anon if you want to chat about it.
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Lineup Lamentations - GW6 - Alon Wildcard Edition
Our Transfers, Captains, and Starting 11s for the week!
—
WALSH
TRANSFERS:
N/A
N/A
Dunno what I'm doing with my life so I will just save a transfer and reassess with two frees next GW. I'm sitting on 1m in the bank, but nothing really obvious is screaming out to me to do.
Couple that with the fact that I'm not in a good FPL place right now, so hopefully a new weekend of games will give me some new perspectives.
GK:
Pope (NOR)
Pope low key been a disaster. 1 clean in 5 is about as bad as you could go these days but with good fixtures still on the horizon am hoping for some points out of this fuck.
DEF:
Only three defenders in for me this weekend.
Alexander-Arnold & Robertson (che)
Trent and Robbo go to Chelsea in a game I don't really expect to be competitive.
A clean feels unlikely but they are always good bets for attacking returns given how they have looked this year so far. No Mount, if he doesn't play, is kind of a big deal for Chelsea so I don't think a clean is completely out of the question to be fair. I'm still sorta kinda okay with holding these two in the medium term through some tough fixtures but we'll see.
Otamendi (WAT)
Otamendi has Watford at home and after the clean in Ukraine maybe him and Dinho are the answer. He's always a shout to gift a goal to the opposition so here's to hoping he doesn't howl on Saturday. He could still just be a really steady and fine pick despite the Norwich game fresh in our minds.
MID:
Salah (che) & Sterling & De Bruyne (WAT)
Still on the triumvirate Mo, Raz, Kevin anchoring the midfield.
Raz bit worrisome getting 90 midweek but otherwise these guys seem like good guys to have and to hold. Great fixture for City and they should score a few goals in that one.
McGinn (ars)
McGinn gets a stay of execution going to Arsenal this weekend.
He looked most likely to score for them against West Ham last game but he just feels very lightweight and bad.The low percentage shots he takes are a real concern and Villa seem to be turning into who we thought they would be preseason: a bad team who don't create chances.
I need to do something with him soon. Arsenal are proving to be a good attacking fixture, however, so at least he's not going to Liverpool or something.
Cantwell (bur)
Finally, Todd gets his second start for me in the second of many more to come. Pretty much all in on ToddyC being a start every week at this point. He enables a lot elsewhere and looks like he'll continue to be in and around points.
FWD:
Pukki (bur) & Haller (MUN)
Haller and Pukki up top still for me. Don't really need much to say about Pukki at this point.
Haller looked so good against Villa but the rest of his teammates did not. Tough fixture with United coming to town but I still believe in Haller and have no plans on shifting him out. As long as he's fit I believe he will return good value for his price.
CAP:
N/A
I don't know who I am capping yet four hours ahead of the deadline. I just wrote out three separate things, one for Raz, one for Mo, and one for Kevin and they all seemed bad and I want to die.
—
ALON
TRANSFERS:
OUT: Wildcard
IN: Wildcard
After many hours last night and this morning of excruciating tinkering here I am.
I’ve flopped my cock out on the table and said fuck it. All. Out. Attack.
GK:
Gunn (BOU)
Gunn seems like the best 4.5 guy to me for the long term play. Unfortunately don’t have 0.1 to get to Pope who is probably better especially with the fixtures but also I like Southampton and Ralph and Gunn more so it makes me a little happier anyway.
Home to Bournemouth isn’t an easy clean at all but the saves should come and a clean would not be unreasonable. Come on Saints.
DEF:
This gaggle of fuckwats that I have assembled at the back all rotate reasonably well to have three reasonable starters every week.
I know it’s diabolical but hopefully with this tough Liverpool run and City mess the two top dogs keep not cleaning and then this will be great... Most likely it’s dumb and fucking bad as usual for me but we’ll see I guess. Fuck it.
Lowton (NOR)
No Pope but I still have a share in Burnley cleans. The fixture run is long and great and while I don’t expect them to keep out Norwich I’m still probably starting Lowton every week for around 9 weeks at least.
Kelly (WOL)
It’d be cool if Kelly starts but he probably won’t.
Home Wolves is a great cleanable fixture is why I’m taking that risk but if he doesn’t play then Lundy boy will come in away Everton.
I went Kelly over Rico because once Lloyd Kelly is back Rico will no longer be starting... There’s a chance Kelly can get back in there at CB or take over for Ward at RB.
Diop (MUN)
I thiiiiink this is better then Lundstram away Everton?? Tough call but the bookies odds agree with me.
Man Utd. are one of the worst attacking teams in the league outside of penalties so I’m hoping that that trend continues and West Ham don’t concede a pen.
MID:
Salah (che), Sterling & De Bruyne (WAT)
The three amigos stick together through times of tribulation.
Nothing to say. Great players, two best teams, lots of points.
Cantwell (bur)
Love Todd. Said everything I needed to say on the pod but yes I’m hoping his bad and unsustainable stats take a big uptick with the much lighter run of fixtures, as they did in GW2. Todd is great.
FWD:
Agüero (WAT)
Yep I went with the big four.
There’s no other reason to go with an old school 3-4-3 with rotating 4.5 defenders unless you’re going big dick swinging at the top right???
So in my eyes I have the best four players in the game. Kun is my captain for a lot of this next run and then figure it out from there maybe downgrade him in a double switch to get Trent once Alisson is back or something. TBD.
Having Kun feels great. And having all the guys feels great.
He should fuck Watford.
Pukki (bur)
Teems is a legend. Just clock in, dong, clock out. Easy life.
Abraham (LIV)
Rough fixture this week - actually could see Giroud this week that would not surprise me at all - but Tammy just looks so ridiculously good and Chelsea have the fixture run to support it. I hope the numbers come up a bit from Tammy and he’ll fly.
BENCH:
Including bench this week so you get the full Wildcard experience.
Hayden (BHA)
Hayden under the radar has just been great. Played 90′ in every match and actually has a little bit of attacking intent creating two big chances. Not much more you can ask for from a 4.5 backup mid.
Lundstram (eve)
As I mentioned above I think that away Everton is a worse cleansheet fixture then home Man Utd. and the bookies agree so I’m not just being a biased fuck... Lundy is an easy auto pick on WC and he’ll likely autosub in for Kelly this week for me.
Söyüncü (TOT)
I mean if you thought I was going without the umlauts then you just don’t know me at all. One of few players I’ve had since GW1.
Leicester’s amazing run starts GW9 so just dodging Spurs and Liverpool and then Soy is pretty much good to go through GW17.
CAP:
Agüero (WAT)
I mean yeah duh kinda spoiled this already in the writeup.
Kun seems like both the best and safest cap for the week after getting rested in UCL. I expect a 3 or 4 to nil type of fuckfest and for Kun to be heavily involved. Let’s go.
—
RANDOM SLACKER OF THE WEEK: V AX
The words of Random Slacker are not officially endorsed by this website nor any employees of FML FPL LLC.
TRANSFERS:
OUT: Sterling, Greenwood
IN: Hayden, Agüero
Coming off a shitty week with 2 frees in hand, what else could I possibly do other than a sideways move?
I know that Raz is a season keeper, but after a full 90’ midweek and no rest over the international break, I’m switching over to Kun and hoping for some short-term gains.
Feels not great, not terrible.
GK:
Pope (NOR)
Already WC’d so Pope’s in for the long haul. Some save points is all I ask for in this one, don’t think Burnley keep Pukki & co out.
DEF:
Alexander-Arnold & Robertson (che)
Robbo and Trent are both due a goal, and they could both bang against a leaky Chelsea defense. Pool is always a shout to clean but not feeling too confident.
Zinchenko (WAT)
City likely to clean with Dinho slotted in at CB and there’s no way I’m benching Zinch. Mendy got some minutes in Champions League so I’ll be sweating the team sheet this week.
MID:
Salah (che)
Mo goes again. He’s just insanely consistent and great.
De Bruyne (WAT)
Kevin is the best value pick in the game and insanely outperforming everyone in all the creativity stats – xA, big chances created and key passes per 90. Season keeper for sure.
Mount (LIV)
After contemplating disMounting since Tuesday, Mason stays in my team. Injury might keep him out this week, but I’ve got too much value built up and Chelsea have a sea of green fixtures after Pool.
Slotting him into my starting lineup and I’ve got Hayden coming off the bench home against Brighton if he isn’t fit.
Cantwell (bur)
The Todd begins his run of starts for my team. He’s just so cheap and the perfect enabler.
FWD:
Pukki (bur)
Two Norwich boys. Couldn’t have predicted it GW1, but here we are. Burnley should be going for it and I see Pukki banging in at least one.
Haller (MUN)
United’s defensive stats actually look good and West Ham were total shit on Monday at Villa so I have no idea what to expect out of Haller. He’s clearly class but I think he might be making way for Tammy next week.
Aguero (WAT)
Highest xG and shots per 90 in the league and rested midweek. Expecting greatness from Kun at the Etihad where we all know he thrives.
CAP:
Aguero (WAT)
After back to back Raz captaincy blanks, I had to go with Kun. Hat trick or the infinite sadness incoming.
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Week 15 NFL odds, picks, how to watch, stream: Colts win thriller over Cowboys, Patriots over Steelers
via WordPress ift.tt/2Eyu2I4
I’ll be honest guys, I almost didn’t get my picks done this week and that’s because I decided that watching 71 straight replays of the “Miami Miracle” would be a better use of my time than finishing my Week 15 picks.
If you put the word “miracle” next to a football play, there’s a 100 percent chance that I’ll be watching it on a loop, non-stop, for at least three straight days. I didn’t leave my house for a month after the “Minneapolis Miracle.”
With the play in Miami, you have to watch it at least 10 times just to fully appreciate the poor tackling effort that Rob Gronkowski made at the end of Kenyan Drake’s run. You know what, let’s watch it one more time, because you can never watch it too many times.
That will never get old. Patriots fans are going to be forced to watch replays of that and the helmet catch for the rest of eternity, which is enough to make you feel good inside.
You know what else makes you feel good inside? Watching football, and we’ll be getting plenty of it this week. As a matter of fact, Week 15 is the only week of the entire NFL season where we get treated to four days of football (Thursday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday). I’m not good at math, but I think that means more than half our week is going to involve football, which means I need to hurry up and get to these picks, because we don’t have any time to waste.
Actually, before we get to the fun stuff, here’s your weekly reminder to check out the picks from all our other CBS Sports NFL writers, which you can do by clicking here. Also, if you’re looking for a new podcast to listen to — and who isn’t — you can click here and subscribe to the Pick Six Podcast. I team up with Will Brinson, Ryan Wilson and Sean Wagner-McGough every week for an NFL recap show that you can download each and every Monday morning during the season. It’s basically music for your ears, except no one actually sings.
Alright, I think I’ve delayed long enough, so let’s get to these picks.
Stream Thursday’s game and all of Sunday’s games on fuboTV, try it for free, and stream the CBS games on CBS All Access.
NFL Week 15 Picks
L.A. Chargers (10-3) at Kansas City (11-2)
8:20 p.m. ET, Thursday (Fox/NFL Network)
Guys, I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is that this is the final Thursday night game of the season. That’s bad news because I’m not sure what I’m going to do with my Thursdays from here on out. Actually, you know what, I do have 17 Hallmark Christmas movies currently on my DVR and they’re not going to watch themselves. Now I just need to figure out if I want to watch “The Gingerbread Romance” or “Christmas Incorporated” first.
Now, I also said I have some good news and the good news is that the NFL is ending “Thursday Night Football” with a bang by giving us the Chargers and the Chiefs. There are only two teams in the NFL that have scored at least 20 points in every game this season and those two teams are playing in this game, which means there’s a 99 percent chance that we’re going to get a crazy shootout.
The one thing that makes this game difficult to predict is that both teams are dealing with some big injuries. On the Chiefs’ end, Tyreek Hill (wrist, heel) and Spencer Ware (shoulder, hamstring) are both battling injuries. On the Chargers’ end, they probably won’t have their two running backs this week: Melvin Gordon is still dealing with a knee injury and Austin Ekeler can’t really move his head right now.
#Chargers RB Austin Ekeler said his injured neck is very stiff and he can’t move his head a whole lot today. He’s officially day-to-day but he appears to have plenty of recovery to do quickly if he’s going to be available Thursday vs. KC.
— Jeff Miller (@JeffMillerLAT) December 10, 2018
Now, I’m not a doctor, but if you can’t move your head three days before you’re supposed to play in a football game, that probably means you’re not going to play in that football game.
Although the Chargers are going to be hurting at running back, the one thing they will have is all of their wide receivers, which is all Philip Rivers needs to win. In the first meeting between these two teams, Rivers threw for 424 yards and he might double that going up against a Chiefs passing defense that ranks dead last in the NFL this year.
As much as I like Rivers, there are a lot of reasons to pick the Chiefs in this game: They have the best record in the AFC, they’ve won nine straight against the Chargers, and home teams are 11-2 on “Thursday Night Football” this year. However, I’m not going to pick the Chiefs.
Back in August, I picked the Chargers to win the AFC West and I’m going to stand by my pick, because if you don’t stand for something, you’ll fall for anything.
Did I steal that quote from my niece’s tumblr page? Yes. Is it the most overused quote ever on the internet? Probably.
“You’ve got to stand for something or you’ll fall for anything.”
— Miranda Lambert (@mirandalambert) February 15, 2012
Am I still picking the Chargers? Definitely.
The pick: Chargers 34-31 over Chiefs
The result: Chargers 29, Chiefs 28
What NFL picks can you make with confidence in Week 15? And which Super Bowl contender goes down hard? Visit SportsLine now to see which NFL teams are winning more than 50 percent of simulations, all from the model that has beaten 98 percent of experts over the past two years.
Dallas (8-5) at Indianapolis (7-6)
1 p.m. ET (Fox)
If the Cowboys make the playoffs this year, they should probably send a thank you note to Jon Gruden, and that’s because he’s basically single-handedly responsible for the the Cowboys success this year. Gruden hasn’t been able to turn the Raiders into a contender, but he turned the Cowboys into one when he decided to trade Amari Cooper from Oakland to Dallas. That deal took place on Oct. 22, and since then, the Cowboys have been unstoppable.
Cooper started his first game for the Cowboys in Week 9, and in the time period since then, he leads the NFL in both receiving yards (642) and receiving touchdowns (six). Oh, and the Cowboys are 5-1 in the six games that he’s played in. If Gruden hadn’t decided to implode his roster and sabotage his own team, none of this would have happened and the Cowboys wouldn’t have Cooper, so maybe they should send him a fruit basket and a gift card to Chili’s on top of that thank-you note. However, they definitely shouldn’t send him any cookie dough, because apparently, that stuff is bad for you.
I don’t want to say the CDC is overreacting, but I’ve been eating cookie dough every day for the past three weeks and I feel fine. As for this pick, I’m taking the Colts, and if I end up missing it, I’m blaming the cookie dough that the CDC said I wasn’t supposed to eat.
The pick: Colts 27-24 over Cowboys
Note: The Cowboys will clinch the NFC East with a win on Sunday, and although I’m not picking them, I am giving you a heads up so you can avoid all Cowboys fans for at least 24 hours after the clinching. As everyone knows, there’s nothing Cowboys fans like to talk about more than how amazing the Cowboys are. If you have a lot of friends who happen to be Cowboys fans, you might want to turn off your phone and quit all social media.
New England (9-4) at Pittsburgh (7-5-1)
4:25 p.m. ET (CBS)
The Patriots are coming into this game after losing on a miracle play in Week 14, and yet somehow, I’m fully convinced that the Steelers actually had the crazier loss on Sunday. For one, they lost to the Raiders, which is basically the NFL equivalent of hitting rock-bottom. The Raiders don’t even have a general manager. I mean, it doesn’t get any more demoralizing than losing to a team and then watching that team fire their general manager the next day.
I didn’t think it was possible for a first-place team to be in total disarray this late into the season, but the Steelers have proven me wrong. The most baffling part of the Raiders game is that Mike Tomlin kept his starting quarterback on the bench even though he was healthy enough to play. After Ben Roethlisberger left the game in the first half with a rib injury, he was ready to return in the third quarter, but Tomlin wouldn’t play him because he didn’t want to ruin the “rhythm and the flow of the game.” That would be like not pulling the chord on your parachute because you don’t want to ruin the rhythm and flow of your free fall. PULL THE CHORD OR YOUR SEASON IS OVER MIKE. Not pulling the chord would end in disaster and it’s starting to feel like that’s where the Steelers season is headed.
if Roethlisberger plays against the Patriots — and he likely will — he’s going to be dealing with a rib injury. If James Conner plays, he’ll be dealing with an ankle injury. The Steelers can’t beat the Patriots when they’re healthy, so I have no idea how they’re going to do it when they’re banged up.
I’ve been writing this picks column since 2013 and in that time, the Steelers have never beaten the Patriots. Including the playoffs, these two teams have met a total of five times over the past five years and the Patriots have won every game. Watching the Steelers choke against the Patriots has basically become an annual tradition and I don’t see that ending this year.
On the other hand, Roethlisberger did win a game on a miracle play once, so maybe the Patriots should be concerned.
The pick: Patriots 30-23 over Steelers
Seahawks special: Seattle (8-5) at San Francisco (3-10)
4:05 p.m. ET (Fox)
The fact that this section is back for another week can only mean one thing: My record picking Seahawks games this year is still perfect. This section will only exist as long as my record stays perfect, and right now, it’s sitting at 13-0. Last week, I said the Seahawks would win by double digits in a beatdown of the Vikings and that’s basically what happened on Monday night.
At this point, I’ve decided that if my streak continues, I’m going to start celebrating each new win. If I improve to 14-0 this week, I’m going to buy a Marshawn Lynch elf on the shelf, which sounds weird, but I don’t care. At $19.99, this thing is a steal.
I will say that I think the marketing team for the Marshawn elf blew it. I mean, how is this thing not called “Lynch on a bench?” You get all the fun of an Elf on the Shelf, except on a bench. Someone at NFL Shop needs to make that name change happen.
As for this week’s game, the Seahawks can clinch a playoff berth if they win, which means there’s a 100 percent chance I’m going to pick the Seahawks in this game, and I won’t be surprised if things gets ugly. For one, I’m pretty sure everyone in Seattle’s locker room is still slightly bitter about the fact that Richard Sherman called the Seahawks a “middle of the road team.”
If the Seahawks are a middle of the road team, then I’m not sure what that makes the 49ers. Not only did they lose to the Seahawks 43-16 back in Week 13, but they’ve also lost nine straight games to the Seahawks dating back to the beginning of the 2014 season.
This definitely has all the makings of a trap game, but with Sherman’s quote and the 49ers upsetting the Broncos on Sunday, I don’t think the Seahawks will be overlooking anyone.
The pick: Seahawks 31-20 over 49ers
NFL Week 15 picks: All the rest
Texans 27-20 over Jets
Browns 19-16 over Broncos
Falcons 20-13 over Cardinals
Bengals 30-27 over Raiders
Bills 23-16 over Lions
Bears 20-17 over Packers
Vikings 30-17 over Dolphins
Titans 23-20 over Giants
Jaguars 19-13 over Redskins
Ravens 24-16 over Buccaneers
Rams 34-23 over Eagles
Saints 31-24 over Panthers
Last Week
Best pick: Last week, I predicted the Falcons would score 20 points and lose to the Packers, and then the Falcons went out and scored 20 points and lost to the Packers. Of course, the reason I picked the Falcons to lose had nothing to do with the Falcons and everything to do with the Packers. When it comes to making picks, I only have one rule and that rule is that there’s a 100 percent chance I’m going to pick a team to win if they just fired their coach. However, I now feel bad for picking the Packers and taking advantage of Mike McCarthy getting fired, because apparently, he’s a classy guy.
Even though the Packers kicked him to the curb, McCarthy still took a out a full-page ad over the weekend to thank the team and fans for their support. That’s basically the complete opposite of the scorched earth tour that Hue Jackson went on after he got fired. You know, the one where he blamed everyone but himself for the Browns’ failures. Jackson also added insult to injury by taking a job just weeks later with one of the Browns’ biggest rivals.
To put this in layman’s terms, McCarthy’s firing would be the equivalent of a guy getting dumped and then sending his ex-girlfriend a thank you note for a wonderful relationship while Jackson’s firing would be the equivalent of a guy getting dumped and then setting his ex-girlfriend’s house on fire in the same week where he also started dating her slightly less attractive sister.
I think the lesson to be learned here is don’t date your ex-girlfriend’s sister.
Worst pick: Last week, I spent roughly three paragraphs talking about how the freezing cold weather in Chicago would have no effect on a team from California and let me just say that I’ve never been more wrong about anything in my entire life. Not only did I pick the Rams to beat the Bears, but I said they would score 26 points in the win. I’m not sure if you watched the game, but the Rams definitely didn’t beat the Bears and they didn’t come anywhere close to scoring 26 points.
I have no idea why I said the Rams could handle cold weather. As someone who lived in California for six years, I know for a fact that the only thing people in California hate more than non-organic food is cold weather. If it’s not beach weather, then there’s no reason to go outside, but it’s always beach weather, which is why everyone in California is always happy.
I mean, I can’t even type on a computer when the temperature drops below 35 degrees, so I’m not sure why I thought Jared Goff would be able to throw a football. Lesson learned, which means if the Rams play any playoff games this year in a cold-weather city or a city that doesn’t serve organic food, then I’ll definitely be picking against them.
Finally, if you guys have ever wondered which teams I’m actually good at picking, this is the part where I tell you, but I don’t need to tell you, because you already know. Through 14 weeks, I only have a perfect record picking one team: The Seahawks (13-0). Also, I’m 11-2 picking the Rams and 10-3 picking the 49ers, Chargers and Browns (9-3-1).
As for the rest of the NFL, I’m somewhere between 6-7 and 9-4 picking the 27 teams not listed above.
Picks record
Straight up in Week 14: 10-6SU overall: 132-74-2Against the spread in Week 14: 9-7ATS overall: 98-105-5Exact score predictions: 2
You can find John Breech on Facebook or Twitter and if he’s not doing one of those things, he’s probably re-enacting the Miami Miracle with his cats.
ift.tt/2FY3zVO
Posted by smashdownsportsnews on 2018-12-16 13:51:15
Tagged: , Featured , Football , News
The post Week 15 NFL odds, picks, how to watch, stream: Colts win thriller over Cowboys, Patriots over Steelers appeared first on Good Info.
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Sickingly sweet mornings
Cw: food and creepy men.
Ok to rb.
Summary: jeri and malak have a nice morning until some creepy men interrupt their breakfast at a retro dinner, while malak takes care of them,jericos favorite (now in human form) killer bunny keeps her safe
Malak sighed opening his eyes, what hour was it?.
Probably morning, he figured,groaning he stretched his back and Turned his head to his side, there she was, sleeping peacefully.
A clawy hand cups her cheek, caressing it, pressing a kiss to her cheek he pulls her closer, the artificial sunlight spilled thru the blinds, malak squints his eyes and yawns again, staying with his partner a few more minutes.
--morning handsome-- jerico said, awakened by the sudden movement.
Malak cussed under his breath, he was trying to wiggle out of bed without waking her up.
He turns around, and smiled, covering her a bit better with the blanket-- morning my sunshine-- he said pressing a kiss to her forehead-- Keep sleeping, I got some work to do...
Her hand took the one of his claws, stopping Him from standing up, he chuckled --Youre not letting me off the hook that easily, are you?
Jeri shook her head and he smiled wider--fine-- he continued-- what if I take you to a nice breakfast in the human world?
She nodded kissing his hand making him blush a little, then letting him go.
Malak headed to his Office, to finish some awful headache inducing paperwork. He really wished he could still be in bed cuddling with his girlfriend, or at the least have her on his lap right now.
Shooting up his head as his Office Doors opened slightly he smiled, recognizing the steps behind it.
--jeri...dear-- he said-- didnt I tell you to stay in bed?
Jerico closed the door behind her as she stepped, walking over him and sitting on his lap, a small blanket was placed around her, she held to it while trying to cuddle malak-- dont tell me you dont like this
He chuckles-- well youre the only person I dont lie to -- he kept doing his homework with one hand under the cover, pressed against her Lower back.
He hummed when he felt her fall asleep against his chest and cooed when her face rubbed against his neck on instict.
After the paperwork was done he took her to their bed, he didnt have the heart to wake her up,instead he stayed by her side, enjoying the little peace and quiet.
-- malak?-- a voice said half a n hour later-- what hour is it?
He checked his wriswatch-- uh nine am, dear, yknow I still gotta Keep my promise, so, why dont you get changed and we head for some breakfast?
Tecnically, he didnt have to eat or drink, but he had to admit that after a while, human food became a comfort, a nice Cup of coffee never Killed anyone anyway.
Once she was changed he takes her to the human world, he drives his very expensive car, her by his side, eyes lost on the passing road.
Once they arrive, he parks and opens the door for her-- such a gentleman...-- she flirted.
-- for you my dear? Anything-- he takes her hand helping her step outside the car, he closes the door and takes her to the inside of the dinner.
The dinner was retro themed, her favorite, and as they step in she already feels threatened, there where some people that gave her the jeebie jeebes, she shivers and hugs malak.
His human form was tall with broad shoulders and sharp cheekbones, red eyes and black hair slicked back. He was in a suit that only accentuated his physical form, making him look intimidating.
And for a surprising contrast, jerico was wearing Pink platform shoes (around two inches or three) a Pink skirt with two white stripes near the bottom, and a Pink tanktop with a small boobwindow.
-- if anyone tries anything, know ill protect you-- malak said upon seeing his partners discomfort.
--m maybe I should change-- said jeri sort of hiding as she hugged malak.
-- no, you shouldnt change, they need to learn to behave, youre safe with me my sunshine-- he looked at her with mercifull eyes and kissed her briefly-- come on, okay? I know youre hungry
She nodds with a small smile, the fact that she was safe with malak settled in and Walked with his hand insitctevily on her Lower back.
His cold icy stare send shivers and fear to the men on the receiving end, a simple threat with no words needed "if you touch her, ill kill you".
Jeri and malak Sit on a lonely booth,he drapes his suits jacket over her back when she shivers.
-- malak dear?-- she asks.
He smiled at the nickname-- yes dearest?
--dyou mind ordering for me? -- she asked
-- not at all dearest-- he said signaling the waitress near.
After ordering he thought that she wasnt scared anymore, but her leg bounced a bit too much, besides the fact that he could smell fear.
Normally he would have some of his lackeys Keep them company while outside, but today was different, it was only the two of them.
--whata the matter?-- he asked in husshes.
--the Man on the other booth, the one on the other side of the place has been staring at me for a while now, Im not feeling safe here malak
Malaks blood bloiled, nobody was allowed to make his sunshine unconfortable, he took ver hand and kissed her knuckles-- dearest, Wait for me here, ill ask lucky to come Keep you company okay?
She nodded and as his hand slipped away, he followed the creepy dude to the bathroom.
--Now now, why the long face?-- jeris face looks up when she hears that voice, lucky, in his human form is standing there, yellow suit, hair slicked back yet messy, he sits besides her.
--lucky!-- she said hugging him, his arms hug her protectively, And he kisses the top of her head.
-- boss told me there were sum' creepy men around here, Came to Keep my honneybunny safe while boss beated some creepy fuck to mush
Jeri chuckled fiddling with his purple bowtie, smelling his cherry perfume
Meanwhile, at the male restroom, malak has cornered the creepy fuck, raising Him up against the wall while his other hand clenched in a fist threatened with a punch.
-- now listen here budy, my girl and I just want normal breakfast, If you Keep oogling her like that, ill beat you to a bloody pulp-- his grip on him tightens and the Man nodds-- good-- he set him down on the floor, fixing his clothes-- better get that cleaned.
Yet his hand punches a hole on the wall he was previously held up on as a final warning, and leaves.
--malak!-- jeri Chirped as he sat down giving an ackowledge nodd to Lucky.
-- Its taken care of-- said he.
--Then I should get back, I dont wanna bother you two
Jeri shook her head-- no! Lucky stay!
Malak nodded-- youre already here, just order something
A smile grew on luckys face, ordering the most disgustingly sweet yet darkest coffee there was on the menu.
--i really dont understand how you can eat all that-- added malak seeing the sicklingy sweet waffle with cream, berries, sprinkles and cinnamon.
-- hey, I gotta take the calories to run fast out of somewhere right?
He nodds giving him the reason eating from his toast and drinking from his abyss black coffee.
Jeri meanwhile, Ate her chocolate waffle with cream and sprinkles, her tea with a lemon peel and sugar sitting idly besides the Plate.
After eating breakfast they headed back home, malak and jeri collapse on the bed, the morning was tiring and even though he had some more paperwork to do, he figured it could wait, his sunshine was more important than any paperwork.
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Get to Know Me Tag!
I was tagged by @gerald-the-deraild-gay, who was my first Voltron mutual and is all around an AMAZING person. Seriously. Go follow her. She’s great.
RULES: Answer 28 questions and tag at least 20 blogs you would like to get to know better.
Name: Donovan San Nicolas
Nicknames: Just the common, generic nicknames for a name like Donovan. Don, Donny, DonDon, etcetera. Some people call me Bitch or Whore, though.
Gender: Male
Star Sign: TAURUS UP IN THIS BITCH
Hogwarts House: Slytherin . Hiss hiss motherfuckers.
Height: 5′9″ (5′10″ on a good day)
Time: What kind of fucking time do you want from me? It’s 4:25PM atm if that’s what you wanted to know LMAO
Birthday: 420. I share a birthday with Hitler, I was born on the day of the Columbine Massacre, and you probably get high on my birthday every year without inviting me.
Favorite Bands: UM. Holy shit, that’s a tough question. I really like headbanger/pop-punk bands like Makeout Monday, MCR, The All-American Rejects, Jimmy Eat World, Marianas Trench, and Bowling for Soup, but I also like shit like One Direction and Little Mix so. Take from that what you will.
Favorite Solo Artists: Andra Day, Adele, Lana Del Rey, Beyoncé, Nicki Minaj, Cardi B, Sia, Rachel Platten, Niall Horan, Halsey, Alessia Cara, Ariana Grande, Mariah Carey, Bonnie Tyler, Bridget Mendler, Noah Cyrus, Carly Rae Jepsen, Demi Lovato, Dove Cameron, Shakira, J-Lo, Hailee Steinfeld, James Arthur, Katy Perry, Christina Aguilera, Britney Spears, Leona Lewis, Lorde, Kendrick Lamar, Post Malone, Blackbear, Logic, Taylor Swift, Bruno Mars... Honestly, this list could go on forever. I just really love music. I literally listen to music almost 24/7. I listen to it while I wake up and get ready, while I drive, in class, while I walk around, while I do homework, at work, to help me sleep, etcetera. I almost always have music playing so my list of favorite artists is immense (BUT P!NK IS MY ABSOLUTE FAVORITE SINGER AND PERFORMER OF ALL TIME OKAY LET’S JUST MAKE THAT CLEAR).
Song Stuck in My Head: Boys by Charli XCX. It’s just... such a me song. Boys are quite literally always on my mind.
Last Movie I Watched: Jumanji. 8/10. I watched it with my best friend and Jack Black is fucking hilarious.
When Did I Create My Blog: I wanna say 2016 but it might’ve been 2017. I’m honestly not completely positive because I almost forgot about it for the first few months after I set it up.
Last Thing You Googled: “Statute of Limitations on Drug Trafficking in 1970.” This morning in my CT101 class, we were doing a debate over a case regarding a drug dealer that broke out of prison and established a nice life and family during the 34 years it took for the police to catch her, and I had to try to come up with reasons why the 53 year old ex-druglord shoudn’t be forced to return to prison. Obviously, it was pretty difficult considering everyone in the classroom (myself included) unanimously agreed that she should serve SOME time, even though the statute of limitations on drug trafficking passed while she was on the run (we all agreed that she shouldn’t continue her original sentence of 10-20 years because the statute of limitations was very much left in the dust, BUT she should have to do time for 1. busting out of prison and 2. avoiding the law for 34 fucking years. Bitch is a legend).
Do I Have Any Other Blogs: Yes. I have one side blog for another fandom that I haven’t touched in months (the other mods and I kinda lost most of our interest in the movie’s fandom since it took like 2 years for the sequel to come out) and another one that’s just pure porn. Literal porn that I reblog onto that side blog, which only exists for that sole reason.
Do I Get Asks: Not really. I don’t have very many followers so for the most part not many people interact with me. I’ve been getting a little more attention on my fics lately though because I have a few mutuals that rb my writing who have way more followers than I do :)
Why I Chose My Url: Originally, it was something different BUT THEN Voltron invaded my life and took control. Everyone tells them I’m most similar to Lance in all aspects - appearance, behavior, attitude, insecurity, etc. - and he’s also my son. So. Loverboy Lance it is.
Following: 220
Followers: 139, but I’m positive that about 70% of them are bots
Average Hours of Sleep: How much sleep can a college student with a part-time job POSSIBLY get? Not a lot. Nowhere near enough. I’m a zombie in the mornings and I rely on coffee and high-calorie food to keep me going throughout the day.
Lucky Number: 4 OR 420, depending on the context
Instruments: HAHAHA no
What I’m Wearing: I’m. Actually, I’m naked right now. I’m pretty sure I’m naked for 80% of the time I’m in my bedroom.
Dream Job: I’m a psychology undergrad right now so I’m REALLY hoping to get my Masters and PhD in Psychiatry or Clinical Psychology so that I can work with genuinely insane individuals in psych wards and prisons and such. If that doesn’t work out, I’ll be a therapist, college professor, and/or high school teacher/counselor. We’ll see.
Dream Vacation: I want to go to Europe SO FUCKING BAD. Europe, Greece, Japan, South Korea, and Cuba are at the top of my travel list. Delicious food and delicious men is all I’ve got to say.
Favorite Foods: LITERALLY ANYTHING. I AM A BLACK HOLE FOR FOOD (despite being 135 pounds on a heavy day).
Nationality: 1/2 Chamoru (Guam USA) and 1/2 Filipino (Philipines)
Favorite Song Right Now: I Touch Myself by Divinyls, Bartier Cardi by Cardi B, Chantaje by Shakira, Échame la Culpa by Demi Lovato and Luis Fonsi, and EVERYTHING BY P!NK
I tag @lemonpopwrites, @archetypeofadespota, @potato-fan-girl, @dairy-farmer, and @doubtfulbones
I’d tag more but I DON’T HAVE VERY MANY MUTUALS I’M SORRY
#question tag#donovan tag#donovan talks#not vld#but vld is mentioned#and my chosen mutuals are all vld mutuals#so#get to know me#I've literally never been tagged in one of these I'm actually really happy
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