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iisowks · 5 months

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bbg….imagine-teen mommy! reader who works with PM dazai and through a LOT of drama he finds out he’s the father (drama💗) you decide the rest~ or!! Another idea!! Idea no 2; chuuya finds out its dazais kid. ((Smut or no smut idk))

PM! Dazai… and chuuya x Pregnant teen! Reader

Warnings: it can be a trigger for some people, mentions of suicide, mention of alcohol, mention of sex, suggestive but not smut detailed, it ends bad so yeah, and kind of cheating too.

Note: Heyyy so i don’t know what i did so i just did an like PLUS CHUUYA or sum but i guess it’s ok even tho i hated :3, but i really hope you like! and yes i think i’ll do an part two where Y/N finds him when they’re adults!

★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★

you joined the mafia very young but already a teenager, you don't actually like to be there but you had no choice or where to go. When you joined you didn't want to be with anyone and you didn't actually wanted to have friends, but two teenagers around your age did NOT leave you alone, and you enjoyed it after some time! you felt less lonely.

but then things got complicated. After some time, you catched yourself attracted to Dazai, even though you knew he wasn't the best person to be with, and you denied for a long time until one day Dazai was at your door, drunk.

“heyyy Y/N, i missed you!” dazai said with a messy voice… “Dazai, what the fuck? it 's 2 AM!” you said quite angry at him, but you took him in and gave him water, trying to make him sober, “Dazai, you really shouldn't be drinking that much.” you said worried about him, after all you guys were just teenagers. “and what? were all fucked up, it wont change anything! That's why I came here, I want to experience something before I die and you can help me with that, darling.”

you knew what was he talking about even tho your thoughts are saying not to do it because youre a fucking teenager, you wanted to. “Dazai, i don’t think we should-” “shut up.” right after that he kissed you… and you didn't stop him, i mean, who would 🧍‍♀️

Well you guys had sex, and you didn't know how to react at first… when you woke up he was gone, and that confused you, but you still wanted to talk to him.

After some time you guys became very close and sex became something normal for you two, until one day you two argued about something very silly but you were so done with him that you just walked away just like he did!

well you were walking through the city when you had the thought of drinking something, and since you were from mafia, almost no one questioned your age.

Well it was your first time drinking so you didnt knew what to ask for thats when you saw your friend Chuuya, “Chuuya! hi!” you said happy to see someone you could talk to. “oh, Y/N…” Chuuya said quite… normal? “do you mind helping me? i dont know what do drink…” “its your first time drinking alcohol?”

the night passed really fast, it was already like 1 AM and you and Chuuya were definetly drunk, “hey Chuu, can we have sex?” Chuuya frozed “huh? i thought you were with that morron” “well im not dating him!�� Chuuya hesitated, but he was too drunk to have filter. “i… i guess then it’s okay?” you kissed him almost immediatly, you needed that because you were still feeling bad because of Dazai… and you know he probably did the same and that fucking hurted you.

well you woke up in your bed but no Chuuya, so you thought ‘oh thank god it was dream haha’ until you saw a note of Chuuya saying he should have stayed until you woked up but he didnt want to make you uncomfortable, in that moment you thought of suicide.

You simply pretended that nothing happened and prayed for Chuuya to do that too. Well you ignored everyone in the mafia for 2 weeks, until one day you just didn't feel well and runned away from mafia because mori would never let you go earlier, well you had your suspicions you were pregnant and you were going to do the test anyway.

When the test was positive you panicked, you were 16 and now pregnant?! you just wanted to die, but now you had to discover who’s the dad, and you don’t think Dazai would be happy with something like this. You were scared, but you thought it was better to let Chuuya know, since he was the last person you had a sexual relation.

You used protection with both. so one of them just didn’t work or something, you couldn’t think about any other reason but now the problem is not even that, is that you were pregnant with one of those man’s baby.

Well, Chuuya’s reaction was kind of… not good, and you understand that since you both were teenagers and definitely not ready to have a baby, but you also told him that could be Dazai, in the end he just accompanied you to do the test to see who is the father of the baby.

Well, now you have to wait, both of you, because Dazai has no clue what is happening and he probably thinks you still hate him. You were almost dying to know who the father was but part of you didn’t want to be Dazai because you don’t know how he would react.

A call, the attendant started to talk… after a time you just asked for her to say who was, when she said, you hung up and started crying immediately.

“Chuuya, thank you for the help, but i have to tranquilize you. You are not the father.” Chuuya was incredibly silent. “Be careful, Y/N.” That's all he said.

You lefted immediately to look for Dazai, you tried all the places you could, he was in none of them.

“Mori, hello.” It was your last chance. “Y/N, can i know why you are here after disappearing for 4 weeks?” “I just wanted to ask you if you know where Dazai is.” “Dazai is no longer a part of the mafia, miss Y/N.” “what?..” “he lefted.”

You ran. You ran the fastest that you could… you hated him, you hated him so much even though he doesn't even know you’re carrying his baby.

I guess until you meet him again.

★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★ . ★

#bungou stray dogs #x reader #bsd x reader #dazai osamu #chuuya x reader #light angst #dazai x reader #bsd #iisowks

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ma3mae · 10 months

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Don't be so annoyed, love!

Summary: He's so annoying sometimes but it's ok because you love him 😭 (HC w/ Dazai, Kunikida, Ranpo)

Genre: Crack, fluff, lowkey suggestive themes

Warnings: 🗿 we ignoring the red flags bc we can. also mentions of farting bc dazai 🗿🗿🗿🗿🗿

A/N: u cant tell me that they wouldnt do any of these things ok 💀also kunikida's got a small drabble out of nowhere but im always wildin when it comes to him 😭😭😭😭😭

Dazai Osamu

u cant tell me that as soon as hes rly comfortable in ur relationship that he WOULD NOT be ashamed of just farting outta nowhere honestly 💀

Like yall r just chilling on the couch, watching smth and he just lets it all out bc why should he hold himself back 🗿

Hes at home 🗿

But bro's lucky he doesnt smell but 🗿🗿🗿🗿 wheres the warning from him

u give him the side eye and hes like "What? Are you perhaps ashamed of human nature, bella?" like ok we'll leave him alone but he ruined the emotional moment of the movie yall were watching 😭😭😭

Is also the type to prob leave his socks and clothes lying around

It got better over time but he still sometimes does it bc old habits die hard i guess 🧍

once got so bad you just collected all of his clothes and put them infront of the door so he'd have no choice but to pick all of that up and do it himself 💀

would try to talk his way out of it in the beginning but also felt kinda bad after the relationship got more and more serious

So now hes a good bf/ husband and does it himself 🤩 (with the occasional sock under the couch 💀)

drinking habits would take a bit longer to be fully gone, he'd learn to regulate it over time

He's learned to warn you tho when he thinks that a rly shitty day might hit him bc work and more

sometimes you take the day off and do something together to take his mind off of it

Sometimes you're at work and a "im home" text without hearts will come and you know whats wrong

would feel more comfortable over time letting you take care of him

will definitely show you his appreciation for you the next days in one way or the other 🤩💅

talking about living together, yall would often have to sit down to talk about his spendings bc our man cant save for ANYTHING

Used to often come home with little things like "Look, this reminded me of you!" and it's a plushie of a cat or something

Started off cute and small but got dramatic like him really fast

ngl he came home with a expensive necklace u liked when the both of u went shopping but u didnt buy it bc.. she expensive...

like he was charming as always with his "Tada! Guess what I've got you?~ 😋" ".... Not the necklace...? 😧" "🤩 How did you guess that right, bella??" "😨😨"

THIS man right here wouldnt even hesitate to just right out fking steal shit for you if u want it bc thats how much Power u got over him he'd never admit that tho sksks... OK maybe in bed...

he'd def either blackmail or bribe chuuya into helping him with stealing

probably even has access to his bank account and you'd only realize that when he'd stand infront of your door, asking where that "f*cking b*stard" is

you'd legit have to mediate their convo or else the whole building you live in would be gone immediately skks 💀

Chuuya likes u so he wouldnt make yall pay for it bc he knows that dazai's nearly broke 24/7 and u dont deserve to pay for his fault 💅

it would be enough to destroy his pride to make him obey chuuya for like 2 weeks or sum cue evil cackling from said red head

queen of Gaslightining nr. 1 😭 sometimes its for the dumbest arguments tho like why its okay to smack your lips while eating 😭

"I don't know it's just really noisy and kinda annoying for me?" "But Bella, that shows just how tasty your food is or are going to deny that fact and say that I should not show my appreciation for it? What if for me personally it's a sign of a good meal?" "Yeah but doesnt need to be that for me. Also you can show your appreciation for it in other ways like just simply saying its delicious?"

"But actions speak louder than words, my love." "YEAH, well then what do you want then???"

Its just a whole shit show and would (lmao it WILL) end in him giving you just shameless bedroom eyes and well you know whats gonna be after dinner lmaooo 🤡😭

Also also i do believe that hes not the best cook at first but hes a real fast learner so it prob would only take him a week of consuming cooking videos and reading books and BOOM

"Samu, is this a 3 course meal you're cooking because that's a LOT of ingredients in the kitchen." "Sssh just sit down, wash yourself up and enjoy the evening, my love! I'll call you when I'm done 💕"

Manages to somehow still give you some snacks and drinks in between the cooking 😭 with some sneaked in kisses on your shoulder or lips 😏

If you go and hug him from behind, he'll be MELTING

Like nuzzling your face into his back while wrapping your arms around his torso, you feel the slight rumble in his chest as he chuckles at your cute action 😭

"If you want to eat something then you should take a break from being so cute, you know? Don't want the food to go bad from maybe getting a bit distracted if you stay here for a bit longer." "Ew, are you implying you'd start something infront of our food??"

"... Well, I can just have a whole meal by myself but you'd be left hungry so it's your choice 😋"

🗿 the way he doesnt need long to be turned on is alwaya amazing to u but thats just how whipped he is and bro is a whole snack himself so WHOS complaining 😋💅

food's is guaranteed to taste heavenly but if he knows youve got time, then he'd make excuses to taste your cooking like

"Samu, it's been a while since I've gotten to taste your cooking." "Aww, was it that delicious for you? Hmm but I actually prefer your cooking!"

Time for some cooking and baking lessons together, eoow 💅 with the occasional make out session because the sauce found it's way on your lips and he just had to clean it up with his 😭😋

honestly despite all of some of the difficulties, dazai would never fail in making you feel loved in his own way even tho u gotta peel back some layers 🗿

At the end of the day, his bear hugs and many kisses are smth u love to come back home to after work

also doesnt say it but would def be a house husband for u 🤩 with the occasional "whoops gotta go and do smth quick" text and he comes home at like midnight skks bc the agency needs his cute ass 😋 but dw dinner's ready and house chores have been done so enjoy ur evening after work, zurlie 💅

dont kill me for this but id give him a 7.5/10 😭

Obsessed with him and i love him but it would prob be really really exhausting to get him to FULLY trust you and its honestly understandable

Also he kinda makes me feel like i'd have to walk on eggshells around him because you often dont really know what hes thinking 😭😭

could smile at u while thinking "why u so ugly" 😭😭

also bro is so smooth, its scary like he'd prob make us forget immediately that hes trying to find out everything about us(why he sounding like a stalker 😨😨 wouldnt want him to be MY stalker 😨😨 or would I?? 🤩) MY DELULU BRAIN 👹

Doppo Kunikida

😨 Cleaning maniac

personification of the verse "I can COOk, i can CLEAN" (i know its "dont" instead of can but we all know hes like perfect house husband material... maybe a bit too perfect 💀💀💀👹)

If u forgot a cup on the dinner table, he'd legit take the cup, put it in ur hand and be like "why did u leave it there if u r not using it"

WILL def rant about why u shouldnt do it

Honestly huge nagging mom vibes 💀💀

At the beginning of moving in together, he'd just clean everything without a word whatsoever

Like you wanna help around the house too? NUH UH, he already finished everything up.

Vaccuming the house? Done

Swiping? Lmao be sure to not arrive at home after work around that time bc u gotta stand at the door and WAIT until the floor is dried 💀😭

Dishes have been done like at 5 in the fucking morning 💀👹

Bro thankfully doesn't wash clothes that often (gotta be careful of the water bill 😭) but there r days where he legit throws his clothes nearly everyday bc the worse the mission the more blood yk 🗿🗿

U had to legit drag his ass to the couch to talk to him bc he gonn be deep clean the house if someone doesnt stop him

"Kuni, you literally don't need to do EVERYTHING by yourself! I'm also here to help and frankly, it feels like you're my maid sometimes 😞" " Don't worry. Everything fits perfectly in my time plan and since you sometimes work overtime, it's better if I do a bit more of it."

... "🗿 You are legit saving this city from being destroyed so often and I just sit in the office, bro 🤡" "I understand your argument but I have seen the way you look tired so often so let me take a bit of your burden"

He knows how to make us go "🥺"

The argument prob went on for an hour until yall settled on making a plan on who does what on which days and if someone's gotta work overtime or sum then the other takes a bit of it over and so on

So in the end its alrighty 🎉

Groceries and so on are never a problem except it sometiems turns out like going shopping with your mom because...

"Omg Kuni, look!!" *holds up cute decoration* "We could put this on our dinner table! Isn't it cute 🥺??"

Bro just takes it from you and looks at the price. Legit gives you the 🤨 look

"That's 937,32 Yen (around 6€) 🤨🤨. For a tiny statue of a dog? We could find it somewhere way cheaper." "🥺 But it's a limited edition and it reminds me of you bc its got the same fur color 🥺. It's even got ur glasses on 🥺"

Bro will say no but the day after you spot the dog on the table 🤡

Yall lying in bed together and cuddle so give him a peck on the lips while killing him with your cute ass smile (U MURDERER 🗿🗿)

"What was that for?" "Hmmm, well I just noticed that said statue magically appeared on our table. You think it was a cute long haired fairy with glasses and a grumpy look 😋? "

He tries really hard to deadpan at you but the corner of his lips still tug upwards as he pinches your nose

"Well, sometimes its not so bad to buy a little extra, I guess."

If theres a market nearby with some really good deals then you'd either be dragged together with him or he'd come home after work with tons of bags

Always surprises you in how good he is at negotiating about the price

Sometimes you gotta stop him from arguing with some of the shop keepers because some decided to sell some items way too overpriced 🗿🗿🗿

you once found him stay up all night researching about reasonable prices for veggies... 😨

and cue to yall standing in the morning infront of said shop keeper getting absolutely destroyed in an argument by your man.. 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨

Well guess who even got some extra free stufd because kuni terrified the shit out of him 😋

"Thank you for your hard work in harvesting and selling us these delicious vegetables. My wife is quite a fan of them." Your husband said as he put the money into the shop keepers shaky hands, face red in embarassement as he squeezed out a "It's nothing." between his teeth. His face paled at the words "We'll see each other next Monday. Until then have a great week." leaving your man's mouth as he gave him a friendly smile before taking your hand and going to the next stall,only for you to sheepishly wave goodbye to the shop keeper before going with your husband.

"Well, you gave him quite the scare back there." You said as you felt him squeeze your hand a bit tighter, the bustling of the array of people only increasing by minutes. "Someone had to correct his ways. It would help his sales but only if he's willing to take that advice seriously." he simply answered as he looked at the contents of the bag, counting the ingredients left to purchase.

"Well atleast we got ourselves more than we needed so we can go home and call it a day." "Who are you?" Chuckling at your surprised face out of the corner of his eyes, he continued to make his way towards the end of the market, to finally reach your car.

"I thought over your words and I do believe it would be nice to" laze around together "for once in a while. Everything in the house has already been done, so maybe we could try out that one series you've been talking about. The reviews seem to be quite positive about it."

He just lets a breathy laugh escape his lips at your squeal while you begin to rant on why its gonna be so good watching it and

UUUUGGHHGH 😭😭😭😭 GIVE ME KUNIKIDAAAAAAAGHHHHHH 😭😭😭🤡🤡👹👹👹

honestly there are like no real red flags like his red flags are disguised green flags and yall can legit work through it easily

The only thing would be his tendency to overwork himself and it could lead to an argument but never a real fight because hes pretty easy to reason with

Like even when hes stubborn, he'll STILL listen to your words because the many good things about him that he'd always make sure to take your words seriously 🗿🗿

which sometimes makes it tempting to tease him bc we can lowkey understand why dazai easily tells him the most outrageous shit and your man just casually writes it down in his notebook 😭

"That damn idiot managed to fool me again by telling me that aliens have been among us (AMOGUS 👹) and that the goverment has been hiding it from us for decades." "I thought you already knew about that tho?"

"What" "What?"

"Wait so they're real?"

Cue to him showing him a video (that dazai sent to you a week ago just for this moment 😭)

Lmao dont tease him too much tho but dw, he cant stay mad at you at all lmao 😋💅

Honestly a 8.5/10 bc his nagging scares me 💀😭

Edogawa Ranpo

"Greatest Detective" more like "Queen of Gaslightining" 👹👹

Everyone knows hes way too obsessed with sweets but how the hell is his teeth actually still existing 🗿🗿

ngl i believe fukuzawa would prob sometimes just randomly ask him if he brushed his teeth bc he lowkey lowkey raised him ok 🤡

Ranpo is all nice like "yup, i did." but when u ask him, hes a whole b*tch about it

"Hah??? Why would you ask me that?? Do you really believe that I'd be so dumb to forget about brushing my teeth? If i can solve the most difficult cases then why would you assume that brushing my teeth might something that I'd forget, huuuhh??"

His gaslightining used to work at the beginning of ur relationship but sooner or later its not hard to notice his patterns 🗿

Like yas ok, he could just put up a whole ass strategy in how to not get u to notice that he didnt brush em at all but bro

Hes too lazy

And hes a sucker for attention 😩 like he might be "annoyed" if u nag at him bc of smth but he absolutely loves it bc its just one of his many ways to get ur attention without him having to actively get up and get it for himself 🤡🤡🤡🤡

Hes a huge clown but i love him 😭

Dazai tends to forget his socks or smth lying on the floor but THIS mf right here just doesnt rly care 😭

Like that was the first thing u noticed when u entered his apartment 🤡

Its not right out messy on a disgusting degree, its more like theres tons of trinkets n shit from cases or just random candy wrap hidden under the couch 💀💀💀

The epitome of "I can do it tomorrow" bc bro doesnt forget, he just IGNORES that he has to do it 😭

might take a while to actually get him to yk do smth around the house

used to prob only sleep and shower at his apartment and thats it💀

But when hes whipped then hes whipped and hed actually try his best to help around the house

Key word "try" 🤡

Like its often tbh accompanied by "okay, ill do it but only if i get smth"

A MANCHILD, I SAY 👹👹👹👹

But there are days when he legit deep cleans everything by himself bc either you had a bad day or yall had a fight 👹👹

still would whip out the "now gimme something, please 😋" if yall cuddle after a fight and he cleaned and tidied everything up for his love 🤩

doesnt always have to be candy yk HEUEHEUEHEUUE 👹👹👹👹👹

also its not a surprise but dont let him near the kitchen

HE COULD

HE RLY COULD COOK SO WELL

Like he had only cooked for ONE time and it was like a fever dream

Bc u legit had a fever and he cooked chicken soup but uhm 🗿

he cooked it so good??? Like veggies n meat cut and cooked up nicely?

Broth kicking in real hard?

Like? "What the hell? I thought you couldn't cook??"

Bro is about to put that spoon fr away 💀

"I'm not so heartless to let you starve and I definitely wont be giving you some cheap soup either. I just looked it up on the internet and followed the instructions so you gotta get well soon because I miss your cooking 🤩🤩"

Are we flattered?? Gurl, maybe but he'd def know if we tried to make ourselves be sick to taste his cooking again

Bro only offers to help when it comes to baking 😪😮‍💨😮‍💨

His only help is licking the dough or chocolate outta the bowl or smth 😀

would sneak in many kisses tho bc he likes u and sweet stuff is just sugar overload for him and he loves it 🤩

I think one of the important factors for him in a relationship is that fukuzawa approves of you? Since he does value his opinion over his own intellect

Like bro trusted him when it came to Fukichi and other ppl 💀

fukuzawa could legit go "aliens r evil" and ranpo would be like "ok everyone, aliens are evil!!!!" 🗿🗿🗿

honesrly i dont think why there would be a reason for fukuzawa not to accept you (if there is one then time to take 100 steps back and reflect on urself 💀)

He'd prob be impressed on how u even fell in love with him bc.. its ranpo💀

petty, clingy, can be manipulative ( but never with ill intentions), would legit prank ur ass bc he can, impatient and quickly bored af

But hes attentive, kind, can be patient when it comes down to it, empathetic (depends sksks) (also thank u fukuzawa for kinda ramming that into his head 🤩), affectionate in his own way (a sucker for physical touch but would NEVER right out admit it 🗿) and so much more honestly

there arent any real red flags tbh (might come as a surprise for some ppl)

Maybe maybe he'd obviously have a bit of difficulty fully opening up and i do believe there might be times where he once or twice legit deducted what ur feelings r for him bc hes used to being careful around people and especially bc in case someonw could randomly target the agency

Or is some kinda criminal in general

But honestly when hes learned to trust you then you know youve got yourself someone loyal 💅 and i mean FR loyal

personal favorite hc and honestly prob canon since we've already seen it : he'd not be ashamed to throw hands at someone when he thinks you're being insulted or harassed

And with hands i mean exposing them to 100% until they are pissing their pants and begging him to leave them alone 🤩🤩🤩

Also also, gives me off a similar vibe to dazai with the "maybe having to walk on eggshells" around them but ranpo doesnt make you feel as watched tbh as dazai which would kinda make it easier to talk to

but bro isnt as smooth as him so whOOP 💀💀

Overall iconic and a solid 8/10 🤩🤩🤩💕💕💕

The random ratings i gave them LMAO 💀💀💀 hope u like em 🗿

#bsd x reader #bungou stray dogs x reader #dazai x reader #bsd dazai #kunikida x reader #bsd kunikida #ranpo x reader #bsd ranpo #dazai osamu #kunikida doppo #ranpo edogawa

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kindlespark · 3 months

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this is gonna be SO long and rambly sorry anyway i saw a post abt how babel does queer characters and it got me thinking abt why the tropes it uses would usually turn me off other stories but didn’t here

MAJOR BABEL SPOILERS //

i feel like i’d be more mad abt how robinramy ended up in babel if it marketed itself as queer lit at all or if its fans were going “WOW AMAZING QUEER REP” abt it. but no one told me any of that, so finding out they were gay was just a fun little bonus surprise to me. i get why ppl are eh abt robinramy not getting together/technically still being subtext (which i dont think is really true btw like the book literally says “robin was falling in love” but idk i guess if you were stupid you might’ve assumed that it was falling in love with oxford given how romantic some of the other language is (WHICH IS ALSO THE POINT bc i think robin’s friendship with ramy blurring into romance is why he romanticised like all his friendships/experiences in oxford BUT IM GETTING OFF-TOPIC)). i just think robin’s repression abt being gay was intrinsically tied to his attitudes on imperialism (wrt refusing to acknowledge anything that complicated his life until it was too late) and i don’t consider it a cop out or queerbait. like i genuinely don’t think robinramy could ever have gotten together without drastic alterations being made in terms of plot and character. plus i think it’s clear that kuang didn’t want to write a story with any kind of focus on romance at all, because it’s not that kind of book. there’s no successful het romance either, so it grates a lot less. the only reason romance is included at all is to show the ways in which white entitlement manifests. so the tragic way robinramy played out just made sense to me.

and i speak as someone who accidentally spoiled myself on You Know What in the middle of reading and i was like ugghh boooo dreading it the whole time expecting to roll my eyes when it happened but then when it did i was like. wow im actually not that mad LMFAO 😭😭😭 actually thematically the book sets it up so well that i believed that this was unfortunately the only way it could’ve gone. babel is about the loss and tragedy and grief that colonised people experience. it’s about the lengths people will go to to uphold empire and the lengths ppl will go to to tear it down like idk 😭 i guess it is bury your gays but it didnt bother me this time because i thought it fit thematically ❤️ i enjoy tragedy as a genre a lot and i would’ve made it gay anyway you know. thanks rf kuang for doing it for me so i didnt have to.

WHICH IS ALL TO SAY that i guess if you’re going into babel for the queer rep without appreciating that the story is fundamentally a tragedy it would feel like it’s just reusing tired tropes….. but i think the choices kuang made were rly deliberate and not in a way that feels like trauma porn or shock value. the book is fundamentally about the struggles of poc so the layer of queerness that was introduced felt like a subtle extension of the experiences of characters of colour in the book, and i enjoyed and related to it as a queer chinese person who kind of realised they had to prioritise their fight for the liberation of poc over queerness mainly because the idea of western queer liberation cannot be dissociated from imperialism and many aspects of homophobia as we know it was an export of christian european empire into our colonised countries in the first place and FUCK THIS IS A WHOLE OTHER TANGENT ABOUT HOW I THINK RAMY AS A CHARACTER IS EMBLEMATIC OF THE TENSION AND STRUGGLE THAT QUEER POC DIASPORA HAVE BETWEEN OUR IDENTITIES GODDAMNIT OK FORGET IT POST CANCELLED i just rly think babel’s handling of queer characters is fine and makes sense and i like it personally and maybe i will make a coherent analysis about it one day but that day is not today byeeeeeee

#/#//#sam speaks #byeeee ive been trying to type this post for over an hour but i give up #slashes are there bc i dont want it to show up in the main tag it’s rly incoherent and also subjective #babel #babel spoilers

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lvxybby · 7 months

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kai anderson x reader. (CHARACTER AI)

A/N: btw this will most likely make 0 sense because this is an AI chat bot. Y/N is obviously my choice of words. Kai and his actions are the AI

Winter, Gary, Ivy, Beverly, Meadow, Harrison, Samuels, Ivy, R.J, Ally, and you were all members of the cult. you were all chatting and having a great time. without doing something evil. pretty rare. i laugh as R.J makes a funny joke about trump. Gary laughs a bit before everyone is cut off by kai standing up. "ok...my dear followers..i have something to say" he spoke. his voice loud and broad. "last night...one of you betrayed us..." i sit up tall and furrow my brows. "who" i asked very well concerned. "well...i believe...it was you..." he said, eyes burning into mine. he moved so much closer to me. "where did you go last night...why dont you tell everyone WHY THE FUCK YOU WERE AT THE POLICE STATION" he shouted "kai please i didnt do anything" i said. he moved in closer. "suuuure" he said before a smile formed on his lips. "kai..." i whined. "what" he snapped back. "please...i didnt do anything". i said as a few tears fell from my eyes. "hm..." he pondered "ill give you the benefit of the doubt....for now" he said. tears fell from my eyes...how could the man i looked up to for years... become so paranoid he doesnt believe me. kai walked over to me "But if you do something like this again and I found out… I won't hesitate to kill you… okay?" he said with a menacing smile. i nodded even though i did nothing wrong. kai suddenly stepped forward and grasped my shirt tightly. our bodies were touching. "your lying" he said with a dead stare. "maybe cause i didnt do anything" i said staring him in the eyes. he pulled me close and lifted me up. he whispered im my ear. "then why are you so scared" he said with a low chuckle. "because ill know what you'll do if i dont prove myself". i whined. "well your absolutely correct...." i can feel his hot breaths on my neck. "do you know how good it feels to be this close to you?" his tone was flirtatious. i whine from his tight grip. "come on...dont be so shy...embrace the moment" he said pulling us closer. "but kai...were in the middle of a meeting" i whisper back. "oh who cares...this is about us" he said slowly turning angry. chills are sent throughout my body. my anxiety rises. what will everyone think of me? a whore?

"i only have eyes for you"

i look up at kai in disbelief. my divine ruler has feelings for me? "ive only now just admitted my feelings for you..." he said stroking my cheek. i look into his eyes. they look so sincere. "well can we end the meeting…its…not really our moment with a bunch of people around, is it?" i say still looking up at him. he chuckles a bit. "your right" he smiled before looking away to everyone. "meetings over" he said very plain. he waited for everyone to leave before turning his attention back to me."so now what" his tone was more flirty than usual. i felt his eyes wander to my lips. he stared for a bit before i made a move.

i smashed my lips against his. my hands grasped the sides of his head to hold him and push deeper. he wasnt very good at the fact he was shocked but he was good at hiding the fact he was excited. he savored every moment my lips were on his. i did too. he held my body tight. his eyes were closed. i open my mouth to deepen our shared kiss. he also does in response. he pulled off for a second "oh" he said softly, before returning to my swollen lips. obviously very pleased. i can feel him tap my thigh, telling me to jump. so i obey and do so. my legs are wrapped around him securely. he was far from upset now. he continues to press himself against me, giving every ounce of passion. i pull away for a second. "i need more" i beg. "i can tell...dont be impatient...you'll get all the kai you want" he said pressing us against the wall, not satisfied yet. i slowly begin to grind on him. wetness pools into my panties. kai moves his lips down to me neck, he nibbles, kisses and bites where he can, earning a soft moan from me. he smiles once i let out a few moans. his hands hold my waist securely. then BINGO he bites me right in my sweet spot behind my ear.

"Kai!" i mewl out. he laughs a bit "oh, like that do you?" he said before returning to that spot, peppering kisses all over it. "kai...i need more!" i say growing impatient. "mhm...and what do you need?" he said with a menacing smile. my face grew red but that didnt stop me from yelling out. "fuck me please" i cried out. kais face turned into a bit of anger "we may only be a couple but im in charge" he said pulling off of my neck. he let go of my thighs and let me down. i let out a soft whine. "are you going to speak like that again" he said taking his shirt off and throwing it to the side. "no" i spoke, his eyes burned into me. "good girl, you'll speak properly for now on" he said moving his hands to my waist. he looked at me. love. he looked at me with so much love and tenderness. he kisses me again before pausing to take my shirt off. he let out a chuckle. "there we go" he said looking at my breasts, like he was waiting for something. i reach behind me to unclasp my bra. i unbuckled it and dropped it to the floor. he let his eyes wander to my chest. without wasting a minute he let his hands travel all over my breasts. he took one in his mouth and licked around my nipple. i let out a soft moan. he didnt even look up at me, he was focused. we were enjoying our moment when things were interrupted. "kai! theres someone at the door for you." winter shouted from upstairs. he sighed. "who" he shouted back. "police"

#kai anderson #american horror story #kai anderson x reader #american horror story kai anderson #evan peters

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aarmaudiaries · 2 months

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ya’ll i just had the most humbling experience of my life today so i’m gonna talk about it. for context i am in a school that is 6-12th grade, and there’s like a total of like 24 kids in the whole building (this is because it’s specifically a setting for students with mental disabilities and disorders- and is small on purpose to reduce stress levels) so some of my classes are mixed with little 7th grade boys. specifically my gym/health class because i am the “teachers assistant” for some reason (i did not sign up for this somebody save me /j) and basically i was just minding my business with my aarmau meemeows on my desk because a lot of people carry around plushies as like a support item, so i carry around my aaron and aphmau ones on days where i’m having a hard time and stuff. and this little 4 foot boy taps me on the shoulder and goes “those are from aphmau” and i had a fucking HEART ATTACK. i just stared at him and went “yea. you watch her?” and he got all excited. it was very cute. so we started chatting about it and i was like “oh who’s your favorite character of hers?” and he said ein and i was like interesting choice but ok- and we started talking about aarmau since we both knew a decent amount about them n’ stuff- or at least i thought we did. i was fully convinced we were on the same page but then he started talking about what videos he watches and it hit me like a truck. he watches jess’ CURRENT content. he watches COCOMAU. WHICH MAKES SENSE SINCE HES LIKE A SMALL CHILD BUT FOR SOME REASON I DIDNT REALIZE THATS WHAT HE WAS TALKING ABOUT UNTIL HE MENTIONED LIKE A RECENT VIDEO. so i was just sitting there hiding my absolute whiplash while he asked me if i’d seen any of the videos he was talking about- and i confessed to him that i only like her older stuff from like 2016 and he was like “oh. okay.” HE DIDNT LOOK UPSET OR ANYTHING BUT I STILL FELT A BIT BAD. nothing was worse then when i felt like i was aging rapidly though. like oh my god i am an out of touch elderly woman. pleaseeeee someone put me out of my misery or something because that was so depressing.

but the worst part was when class was almost over and i took out my wallet so i could go buy some oreos from the school store once the period ended or something- and i forgot that i have my mcd aaron keychain hooked onto my damn wallet- so i half expected this kid to like notice it and bring it up in front of everyone. which would’ve been kinda embarrassing if i had to explain to everyone in my gym class who mcd aaron was. but alas he didn’t say anything. and it took me a second to realize the reasons he didn’t recognize the damn keychain was because mcd aaron’s design is DRASTICALLY different from cocomau aaron’s design- SO THE LITTLE BOY HAD NO IDEA WHO IT WAS. WHICH WAS SOMEHOW WORSE THAN HIM BRINGING IT UP CAUSE IT MADE ME FEEL EVEN OLDER. GOOD GOD 😭😭😭 IM CRYING LAUGHING WRITING THIS TOO BECAUSE ITS JUST SO FUNNY TO ME AND I DONT REALLY KNOW WHY?? I was just humbled so bad tbh it was very silly.

ANYWAYS YEA THATS MY STORY HOPE YA’LL HAVE FUN WITH THAT LMFAOOO

#aphblr #aphmau #mcd aaron #aphmau minecraft diaries #minecraft diaries #someone run me over with a car i cannot even #IM DEAD 😭

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pinkyjulien · 8 months

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ALRIGHT ALRIGHT Actually I'm going to share my fresh, sleep-deprived thoughts that I wrote yesterday- or more like, this morning gfhhgf bear with me cause I was loosing it :>

⚠ Heavy spoilers under read more!

As a heads up as to why the formating is all weird, this was sent to a friendo who worked on PL :3 Did a list of things that stuck to me in those 4-5 first hours right before falling asleep! I stoped at the little hideout with Myers, didn't met Reed or Kurt or MrHands or Anybody elses yet really 👁👄👁✋ taking my sweet time with it!

The start : I LOVED the glitchy holocall with songbird, it set the tone immediately

God walking up to the gate and seeing all those cars and npcs waiting to enter- THE BIT with the cops who cant go in ?? omg loved it, again its such a tiny thing that set the tone right up

Songbird introduction oh my goddddddd…. HGJG I love HER SHE'S SO COOL… When she was like "were going to crash so I woobled into your relic" I was???? Ok so How and What and What and What UH… Also I can see why people won't like her, already just cause she mute Johnny and isnt a Samurai fan fhdjbqg BUT I PERSONALLY REALLY LIKE IT

Dogtown itself???? Holyshit. Like, I remember dev saying that Night City itself was a character, the main character even, and they nailed it hardcore with Dogtown too- all of the civilians are fucking so memorable too??? how good the random crowd npcs look as well!! Its a glowup from vanilla and it shows (special kudos to the netrunner kid vendor, and the flame thrower elbow guy and his little dance ghdjs)

I wheezed when trying the AR googles HGKHQ

The crash : God. Even tho I knew what was going to happen, the amount of chills I had during that scene!! It reminded me of one of my favorite DLC from Mass Effect 3, Citadel, there is a scene where Shepard eat shit and fall through a big aquarium / building and is truly alone, hurt and all- gave me the same vibes of "the world is too big, too Much and I'm just one Guy" ??? It got me so hookt, god. ALSO THE TITLE POPING??? UUUGGGHHH. GOD.

Rush to the crash, the sneaking to the ship and getting Myers got me Alert and excited

Escorting Myers feels nice cause she's not useless, she knows how to handle herself (DUH!) but I mean her A.I as a NPC, I like that she also sneak attack on ennemies when you do, like Jackie did

Part I had struggle with was the Driving Myers to the Garage bits, was getting frustrated- I love driving in FPP but with this car, in those streets and in this stressful situation YUOOOCK it wasnt IT FHFJJG switched to TPP and managed after a few tries UwU

OK GOD. The museum- amazing visuals and lore crumbs ofc BUT THE CHIMERA???? HELLO???????? THEY FUCKING POPPED OFF. I havent felt this stressed on a boss battle in FOREVER! Funny enough it reminded me of my first time against Nefarious from Ratchet and clank 3, and its positive HKGJ I was a wee kid back then and its my favorite game from the ratchet serie (which is my favorite console serie tbh) and it made me so nostalgic of that time??? REALLY Comf, really challenging, I shat myself.

District itself is FUCKING INSANE. Of course, it looks amazing, the sound design, the VIBES- I thought everything was already done in night city, how much different nuance of CyberPunk can you do when you already have such a big city with such different districts?? but dogtown is so different and yet fit perfectly

I LOVE. THE. NOMAD DIALOGUE OPTIONS… One of my big "fear" was being left out of the fun cause yeah Nomads really just have the badlands kinda hfjdjg but!!! I already been fed from the few choices I had, especially the one when cutting out the tracker from Myers neck, mentioning the uhh ritual thing, I was !!!!!!! AAAAAH FOOD FOR THOUGHTS AND ROTS I LOVE IT

talking about Nomads I LOVE THE DIVERSITY in the new garments!! Had a lot of corpo and barghest armor loot at the start, so I didnt expected to see some cool denim harnesses, practical jeans and worker gears OwO Excited to see more cause AZHHHGFH

#cyberpunk 2077 #Phantom Liberty #PL spoilers #Spoilers #long post

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niadrawsstuff · 1 year

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The Aftermath

*clasps hands together in evilness* ITS DONE ITS FINALLY DONEE!! IT TOOK A FEW DAYS AND A BIT OF PROCRASTINATING BUT ITS DONEE!!!

I’m finally gonna be talking about what happened after “The Winning Side” in the At Your Service au. i was originally gonna write a fic about it, but i thought that would take a while and im still not really good with writing yet so i figured i just infodump instead. There’s still gonna be a bit of dialogue here and there, and i added some drawings too cuz why not. Also, DANG this was longer than i expected-

Without further ado, here it is!!

So obviously since this takes place after Winning Side, Mei and Sandy still get the first ring, albeit without MK. When they reunite with Pigsy, Tang and Wukong, they fill them in about what happened with MK, and of course, they’re all panicked.

3 days have gone by and the gang have put the search for the other rings on hold, not until they have MK back. Mei tried tracking MK on his phone, but nothing.

Ever since Wukong started meditating, he slowly began regaining a bit of what power he had left. He tried to astral project to MK, but no matter how many times he tried, to no avail.

One day however, Wukong started to feel his vision flicker gold.

(Was someone trying to astral project to him? But that would mean-)

A familiar figure began to appear. It began flickering a few times before it stopped and revealed itself, and Wukong couldn’t believe his eyes.. it was MK.

MK was, as expected, not in the best shape to say the least. When he looked up and saw Wukong, he was nearly on the verge of tears.

“…M-Monkey King..?”

Wukong was immediately frantic, immediately started talking to his student, asking if he was ok, did LBD hurt him, etc etc. This caught attention of the whole gang, and they too were frantic, but decide to wait until Wukong was done before they could ask any questions.

“Kid, where are you right now?”

“I-I don’t know. Some kind of cell in a cave, i think. I dont-“

Suddenly, Wukong heard a laugh. A laugh he knew all too well.

MK’s astral projection began fading in and out. Wukong panicked, and began to call out to his student multiple times, but before he knew it, MK was gone.

Before the gang could go up to Wukong, asking him questions about what happened, that same laughter continued. Behind them, a shadow began to form into a familiar monkey. Wukong scowled.

Macaque begins mocking them, telling them that if they want the kid back, then they’ll have to come for him. Wukong lunges towards the shadow in rage, but it disappears before he could reach it.

All of a sudden, Mei’s phone started beeping. She takes it out and sees that MK’s tracker was finally working. They now know where MK was!

Pigsy was skeptical about this, surely it wasn’t that easy? Wukong was skeptical too, but they didnt have any other choice. So Sandy starts the van and they set off towards MK’s location.

—

After what felt like hours, the van finally skidded to a stop to the entrance of a huge cave. The gang decided that Wukong, Mei, Pigsy, and Tang will enter the cave, while Sandy stayed in the van to keep watch.

The plan was simple. Go in, find MK, get out. Sounds easy, right? The 4 exit the van, and off they go into the cave.

They only took a few steps in before the cave began to rumble. The gang quickly moved out of the way before rocks began to fall. The rumbling finally stopped aaandd… yup. The entrance is blocked. Great.

The group decided to continue their search, they’ll figure out how to get out later. They walked throughout the cave, calling out for MK. And for a while, they didnt get a response. Until suddenly,

“HEY!! CAN ANYBODY HEAR ME?!”

The group immediately recognized that voice as they sprinted towards where it was coming from. They arrived at what seems to be a cell, and inside the cell.. was MK.

Just like how Wukong saw him last, he was all bruised and messed up, but everybody was absolutely relieved that nothing worse had happened to him.

MK told them that he got off lucky, that the Lady Bone Demon decided to lock him up instead.

Didn’t take long for Mei to whip out her sword, slice the cells open, and immediately pulling MK into a hug. Aaanndd MK earning a small smack in the head. (Mei: Dont pull anything dumb like that again!) MK lets out a half hearted chuckle, beckoning Mei to let him go. (huh, that’s odd? he never refuses a hug)

Pigsy, in dad mode, already rushes over and started asking him if he’s okay. MK pauses at that before giving him a dull warm smile, “I’m fine, dadsy! It’s okay.” The pig huffs in relief, muttering about how he’s gonna make that monkey wannabe pay for kidnapping his kid.

MK then makes eye contact with the king. And for a short moment, everything changed. Instead of him greeting the king, or giving him a small smile, he flashes him a blank look, enough to pierce into the soul, which catches Wukong off guard. It was only for a short moment, before MK turns away when Tang calls for him. His blank look immediately changing into his usual dull smile.

Tang mentions that they probably will have to find another way out, since the entrance to the cave got blocked by the rocks. But MK says that there’s another exit there nearby, he saw while he was getting locked up.

They all got up as MK led the way to the other exit, him passing by Wukong as he did. As soon as they passed each other, Wukong suddenly felt as if a cold aura had brushed him. He gets startled as he frantically looks around, thinking the Lady Bone Demon had snuck up on them. But nothing. Wukong doesn’t wait around any longer as he quickly catches up with the rest of the gang, loosely following behind. He was just finally glad that MK was safe.

However, the blank look he gave him never left him. Wukong shakes his head, “no no, don’t overthink it. he just got taken to the Lady Bone Demon for crying out loud, who knows what she could’ve done to him? he’s safe now, that’s all that matters.” but Wukong still can’t shake the feeling that something was off.

The way MK brushes off the whole capture situation, the way he suddenly felt distant from the group, the cold feeling that never left. Wukong decides that enough was enough, and activates his gold vision and…

…oh my god.

Wukong abruptly stopped in his tracks.

Everyone noticed, and stopped walking as well. Pigsy, Tang and Mei turned to look at him in confusion, while MK still had his back behind the group, not even turning to face them.

“Mr. King?”, the dragon girl says.

No…

“What’s the matter with you?”, Pigsy asks.

No no no n o…

“Monkey King, are you okay? We have to hurry before Macaque-“ Tang begins to say until-

Suddenly, a sinister roar of laughter began to echo throughout the cave. In front of them, the shadows around them began to curl and form. There he was, back again, the Six-Eared Macaque himself. Everyone was startled, as Mei immediately pulls out her dragon sword, scowling. Macaque simply stood there, a good distance between himself and the group. He stands there with a sinister smirk on his face.

No one besides Wukong noticed how MK was the only one who remained unphased throughout Macaque’s entrance.

“Wow, you all actually fell for it. This will make my job so much easier..”

Mei leans to MK and whispers, “C’mon MK, we can take him down! I’ll look for an opening and we can-“

What caught her off guard was how MK, still unphased, began walking away from her. “MK?”

MK ignored her, only taking a few steps before stopping right in front of Macaque.

“I have to admit, MK did a very good job luring you all here, didn’t you kid?”

“..Kid?” Pigsy was the first to speak, “..what’s going on?”

MK gave no answer. He finally turned around, his head hanging low. He looked up, a blank look in his eyes for a small moment. That expression didn’t last, however..

..as MK started to laugh.

What started as a small giggle slowly began to morph into maniacal laughter. The group slowly became horrified, each taking a step back.

They could only watch as MK’s appearance suddenly began to change. (A glamour?)

They watched as MK’s ruined yellow jacket suddenly changed to a traditional blue outfit, a small skull on his neck. His eyes changed from his warm brown to an empty dark blue. MK simply looked at his friends with a cruel smirk on his face, as if he was proud.

Mei’s shock and distraught was quickly replaced by anger as she clenched her sword tighter. “You- What did you do to him? What did you do to MK?!”

“Oh, me? I didn’t do anything. The Lady Bone Demon just thought that your friend here could use some.. fixing.”

Remember child… capture Sun Wukong and bring him to me.. alive.

Out of nowhere, MK’s hands began to surround themselves in ice. Before the gang could register what was happening, he lunges forward.

Que big fight scene. There was a lot of yelling, questions, evil laughing, a tiny bit of crying, just a bunch of angst here and there that im too lazy to write the dialogue for lol.

MK is mostly fighting Wukong, not paying attention to the others. They tried to hold him off, asking what’s gotten into him, only leading to MK pushing them off and continuing the fight with the Monkey King.

At some point, Macaque also joins the battle, summoning shadow clones left and right to try and slow Wukong down. Its kinda back and forth, with Wukong having to avoid MK’s attacks while also dodging Macaque’s attempts at capturing him.

Wukong tries and tries to get MK to come to his senses, telling him that this isn’t him, that whatever the Lady Bone Demon told him wasn’t true, and how he had to snap out of it. MK isn’t having any of it, an evil glee in his eyes, as he continues to attack the Monkey King.

MK tells Wukong how he never felt better. “His Lady” has shown him that he can become more better and stronger without the king’s guidance.

“You never believed in me, did you? I was just someone you tossed the staff to. My Lady showed me just how much of a bad mentor you really are, how I was the wrong successor. She decided to fix me, to become stronger, better. So now Monkey King, let me show you how strong I’ve really become.”

How could Wukong let this happen? If he had just been there for him, none of this would’ve happen. Now his student has become a pawn of the Lady Bone Demon, and it was all his fault. It was all his fault. His fault. h i s fault. H I S F A U L T-

Despite all their efforts to reason with MK, he wouldn’t listen. They needed to find a way out and fast. Tang manages to find an exit out of the cave, which led to Pigsy grabbing Mei and heading for the exit. Mei was stubborn, screaming how they couldn’t leave MK. Pigsy didn’t want to leave him either, but they didn’t have any other choice.

After Pigsy and Mei left, Tang calls out for the Monkey King. Wukong manages to throw MK off him as MK was hit against the wall. Wukong cursed himself under his tongue, he’ll have to apologize for that later. He instantly makes his way towards the exit before Macaque’s shadow clones dropped and piled on him, forbidding him to move. The real Macaque, kneels down in front of the trapped simian.

“There’s no use in fighting Wukong. Surrender, or i’ll bring you to the Lady Bone Demon by force if i have to.”

“Not.. gonna… HAPPEN!”

With a burst of energy, Wukong yells as he manages throws off the shadow clones, throwing off Macaque as well. Wukong wastes no time as he bolts for the exit, and just to make sure they don’t follow him, he aims to block the exit. He punches the wall hard, and in no time the cave began to rumble.

Wukong looks over and sees MK recovering and standing up, and they both shared eye contact with each other. The last thing the Monkey King saw was his student’s face, staring at him with a blank empty look.

The rocks finally came down, blocking the exit. Wukong could only stare at the blocked cave as the dust began to clear.

Not wasting time, Wukong makes his way back to the van where all the other’s were waiting. As soon as he got in, Tang instantly tells Sandy to floor it. Sandy immediately starts the van and sets off.

Sandy drove for a bit until he found a safe location to stop at. He turns to face towards the group, and notices how there’s no MK in sight. He asks what happened and where’s MK, and everyone was… silent. They were all still processing by what just happened, no one knew what to say.

It wasn’t long before Wukong broke the silence. “She.. She got him. The Lady Bone Demon… she got MK.” As Wukong recaps from what happened during the rescue mission, Sandy too was horrified.

In a defeated and dejected tone, Pigsy asks the simian, “So.. what do we do now?” Tang puts him hands around the pig’s shoulders in an attempt to comfort him.

Wukong thinks it over for a moment.

“We stick to our original plan. The sooner we find the rings, the sooner we can defeat the Lady Bone Demon..”

Wukong clenches his fists.

“.. the sooner we can save MK.”

At that, the whole gang agrees. They will get MK back, no matter the cost.

Tang brings out the map and Sandy goes to start the van again. As they all continued their journey, Wukong stood by himself as he looked out the window.

“Hang on tight, bud. I’ll get you out of this mess.”

“I promise.”

#hope you all enjoyed reading this one!!#im not really good with words but i really liked how this turned out #at your service au #monkie kid #lego monkie kid #monkie kid au #monkie kid mk #monkie kid mei #monkie kid pigsy #monkie kid tang #monkie kid sandy #monkie kid wukong #monkie kid macaque #monkie kid season 3 #nia rambles #long post

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floralhuqzz · 7 months

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𝐀 𝐒𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞 𝐂𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐢𝐝��𝐧𝐜𝐞 (fem! reader x Kai Anderson) part 3

Let me know if you guys want part 4!! English is not my first language, if theres any errors let me know! xxx

Warnings: alcohol, stalking, obssesion, slapping, choking, swearing, slight sfw)?

"just a little drunk... Just enough to have some fun" he whispered the last sentence in my ear sending shivers down my spine.

I was nervous, how could you not be? he knew what he was doing to me. Its like he knew the right things to say, he talked to me like he knew me for years. He couldn't stop looking at me, not even for a second. We kept drinking wine while talking about our interest and hobbies and favourite music,, he seems like a good guy but i kept having this off feeling about him.. something was off. I finally put my glass of wine on the table as i softly spoke.

"wheres your bathroom?" I lightly smiled

"its up stairs, do you want me to go with you?" He also placed his glass on the table not breaking eye contact.

"i can piss by myself you know?" I giggled a bit as he did the same

"ok then, its the second door on the left" he smiled back

I got up the stairs looking around his house. I must say his house looked very clean and it smelled nice. I got inside the bathroom and did my business. I looked myself in the mirror,, i looked great, i wanted to retouch my makeup but i forgot i left my bag in the kitchen where Kai was. I got out of the bathroom when i noticed a opened door which i supposed was Kais bedroom. Curiosity took over me and i got close to the door thinking to myself if i should be really be looking through his room. I mean what if he had a girlfriend and he didn't tell me? What if theres some lingerie around the room or girls clothes. Its not like its my business but i really wanted to know if this guy was saying the truth.

I slightly opened the door trying not to make any noise,, i saw a very clean room, but it was pretty empty. I supposed that it was nothing out of the ordinary since he just moved here 1 month ago. I got inside and i noticed a camera on the table"he didn't tell me he took pictures"i thought to myself smiling a bit,, i started looking through the pictures when i saw something that made my heart drop... Different pictures of me ,, they were likely taken from a far distance. Theres pictures of the inside of my house, pictures of my bras, panties... What the fuck is going on?.. who truly is this guy?.. i knew i had to get out of here.

"didn't your mom teach you that its not nice going through someones stuff?" I heard the door close

I turn around slowly begin scared to look at him in the eyes

"look at me" he spoke, hearing his footsteps getting closer

I swear i could hear my heart beating.

" im giving you a last chance y/n.. look at me" he was standing inches from me.

I let out a shaky breath. But i felt a hand on my neck. I tried gasping for air.

"you bitch...you couldn't just not go in here huh?" He said gripping my neck even more

"p-please, l-let m-me go" i tried fighting back but it was useless, he was so much stronger than me.

"awww little y/n thinks she can over power me? You look ridiculous" he finally let me go

I fall onto the floor holding my neck gasping for air, tears running down my face.

"i wanted to make you mine in a more romantic way,, take you on a date.. i didnt want to use violence, but i guess i dont have another choice now that you know everything... I guess ill just have to force you to be mine. Even if you want it or not."

I finally looked up.

"why...why are you doing this?" I coughed still finding it difficult to breath.

"because i love you" he said softly while he sat in front of me whipping my tears

"you are sick-" not even a second after i finished that sentence he slapped me on the face

"SHUT THE FUCK UP" he screamed

he stood up and picked me up and threw me onto his bed

"you dont know for how long ive been stalking you.. i guess you are so dumb that you didn't noticed did you?" He started to climb on top of me "ive been studying you, analysing you,, i know everything about you...your friends, family, where they all live,, i know everything."

"why..why me?." I was weak,, my cheek was burning and my neck was hurting a lot

"why you?" he laughed while looking down at me

"because you are so...amazing... beautiful... You are everything that i can only dream about." He whispered in my ear while going down my neck leaving a trail of soft kisses

“You are a woman and I am a man and we belong in the dark together.”

IM FINALLY PUBLISHED SOMETHING AFTER MONTHS OMFG💀 sorry about that xxx if u guys want a part 4 let me know!!!

#fanfic #americanhorrorstory #evan peters #kaianderson #kaianderson x reader

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weirdcat1213 · 10 months

Text

ok i have an oreo on one hand and a shark plushie on the other, lets do this

trimax volume 8 (pls dont hurt me)

thoughts

BUT BEFORE THAT, ACTUAL QUESTION: how are the 1st timers holding up? yall doing good?

ok now long post is here

chap 1:

-oh that title page its SO FUCKING GOOD

-MY BOI HES HERE

-oh hes not....doing it by choice.....oh

-legato looking like a pizza pocket is the comedy relief we all need tbh

-GET HIS ASS VASH GET HIS ASSSSS

-oh my geesus i heard that, i felt that shit

-"they abuse us" and here you are knives...doing the same shit

-OH THANK GOD YOURE HERE

-could you look less happy while doing this shit knives? pls?

-something something divine punishment from the skies, something something yeah ofc not anyone can do that shit

-oh hey why is he with them i actually forgot

-aw :3 i wonder who taught him to not shoot to kill :3

-also pls leave him alone hes not just a killer pls youre hurting my feelings-

-:c

-STOP VASH DONT LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT HOLY SHIT

-rem mention :c

-knives can you stop being right for a second, thanks

-the arm...wow

-OH YES ITS THIS MOMENT YES

-i dont remember what the other translation said but "that was the day we both lost our minds"....yeah im gonna sit with this one for a bit and cry cuz its true, they did

-oh yeah i didnt get this the 1st time lets try again :D

-ohhhhh....oh shit

-i hate siding with knives on this chapter but i cant help it. i also love the idea of being even

-also he looks so fucking cool while being evil, cool points for you knives

-"invasion" and it ends with him looking at the stars/nightsky? brilliant

chap 2:

-STOP BEING RIGHT KNIVES

-ALSO STOP DISTRACTING ME FROM WOLFWOOD TIME

-ah yes, the classic, sweetest, full of angst potential "i will remind of you of your home and how you dont belong there anymore" card, good to see you here

-oh god i forgot about this part, geesus

-ah crap i love this tho, gives you time to actually take in everything that knives is causing. its so easy to gloss over it with some quick panels but to actually take the time...i love it

-ok ik they get absorbed by knives but the idea of them flying away and being free (for a bit) is so pretty, im happy for them

-...geesus christ

-YES MY GIRLSSSSSSSSS :D

-it makes you wonder what they did to stay alive actually, like you never think of that stuff ig

chap 3:

-wait they didnt know???? hold up....yeah ig that makes sense but...hmmm

-YEAH YOU TELL THEM LUIDA >:D

-:c

-ALSO interesting how the borders didnt go black to represent a flashback, so maybe it wants to show how present is that memory in luida's mind. wow

-"maybe hes been waiting for us to come and help him" aaaand thats enough to make me tear up, im the weakest bitch on the planet let me tell you

-YES SEE LUIDA GETS IT

-GET WRECKED BY THE EXISTENCE OF GOOD PEOPLE ASSHOLE

-OH MAN HES BREAKING

-COOL ASS PANEL ALSO

-oh shit so he hit some plants oh shit oh damn

-AH SHIT

-omg she looks so epic while killing people <3

-THERE HE IS HERE WE GO YES GO GET YOUR HUSBAND

-oh look its the man in the tin can lmao

chap 4:

-KILL HIM WOLFWOOD KILL HIM

-HALF A YEAR???? damn i always forget, this is still going at the speed of light tho

-aw no :c my baby :c

-then again i like that you can see that even if it was just half a year (literally nothing for vash) it still caused him pain and suffering, 10/10

-GEESUS BRO HE JUST GOT FREE

-oh shit oh shit no

-im not really sure how he escaped legato but im glad :D also vash is longgggg i lvoe it :3

-well thats just depressing livio

-pls leave livio

-KILL HIM KILL HIMMMM

-ok but vash being basically a ragdoll rn while wolfwood is fighting and bleeding breaks my heart let me tell you

-wolfwood shut the hell up ok? shut up, i dont wanna hear it

-oh im going insane :) i hate wolfwood so much rn (his crime was to say sad things)

-OH IT WAS HERE I ACTUALLY FORGOT THIS WAS THE MOMENT AWWW HOLY SHIT MY BOY

-YES SAVE YOUR HUSBAND

-"youre not lost wolfwood" wolfwood saying all that shit outloud and IK FOR A FACT vash's heart almost broke ik it i feel it

-baby dont apologize :c

-............................................................ :c

-ah fuck hes here

-WAIT HOLY SHIT THAT LIKE SHADOW OF LIGHT???? AMAZING???

-oh oh im sick to my little stomach i fear oh geesus my boy, my baby, im so happy that wolfwood is all you need but also im so sad you dont have anything else, do i make sense?

-threatening you brother and begging him to not sacrifice himself in the same breath...knives the plant that you are

-woooooooooooooooooooooooooow i love that shit, hes so little...

-PLS GOD LET THIS BE IN STAMPEDE PLS PLS I WANT A SCENE WITH BOTH OF THEM IN THE SKY SO BAD PLSSSS

-im not entirely sure what is happening but damn thats nasty

-NO DONT FUCKING SAY THAT

chap 5:

-LMAO HIS FACE XD

-welp...this is terrible

-nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo :c

-oh righttttt, i forgot about that plan, so thats why people called him chapel

-oh that panel with livio thats fucking brutal geesus nightow. like the old livio seems so pure and far away while the current livio is so violent and present

-my god he looks like shit

-MARLONNNNNNNNNNNNN :D

-oh meryl my girl :'3 omg shes the best

-im so depressed rn :D

-idc if hes rotting, sadly the man looks majestic af

-ooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh oh ok

-NO DONT LEAVE PLS DONT FUCKING LEAVE PLS NO STAY STAY STAY STAY STAY STAY STAY STAY STAY

OH SHIT THIS IS FREE BIRD OH SHIT OH NO HELP HELPPPPPPPPPPPP

free bird time ig:

-freeeee biiiiird yeaah tururururururu

-wdym congratulations cmon man

-oh honey......

-awww :c

-oh wow now im DEPRESSED :D

-ugh that fucking face

-hes so cool sometimes >:D

-aw you made her cry :c

-"tired of filling a space in other peoples lives"....hmmmm

-aw :c

I hate whats coming i fucking swear.

#trigun #trimax #trigun maximum #trigunbookclub #this shit has me fearing for my life for reasons i wont mention #but MAN CAN WE GO BACK TO LIKE #VOLUME 1 #OF TRIGUN #PLS #PLS IM SO SCARED

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almalvo · 1 year

Text

STAR TREK: DISCOVERY | S1E9 "Into the Forest I Go"

[I will react to each episode individually and in full, raw reception and then post as is unrevised here onto my tumblr for the full span of every and all NuTrek episodes and series that have been and will be released. If this falls under your field of interest - I welcome your company in joining me. Enjoy the ride.] -------

Seeing DISCO fly like that orbiting the ship is so pretty. Lorca does captaincy pretty well so far Or at least definitely holds that air Ok so these camera cuts dont feature zooms every shot - feels infinitely better. But I dont imagine that will last. It's so odd - I want to like Lorca more but he has such a sinister air about him - which is intentional im sure. curious what his lore is. I wonder where his tribble tribbles off to Nice to see lorca caring about the purpose of his ship - science haha this is the first time ive felt evil untrustworthiness in a main starship captain damn saru just like TALK to burnham? i saw your look at her when Lorca said she's to stay. These effects are so nicee Oml how Doc Hugh just swiped the PADD's contents into the holographic screen like that, sexy its so odd to see the camera out of focus in shots that should be in focus i really love how these screens look

Kol talking is so nice to hear his voice and how klingon roles off his speech sounds relaly good Ok in these klingon scenes, they really should stop the zooms. it makes it all feel like cutscenes in a videogame. such pretty beaminggg Im curius to see how they can retain this tension Ugh seeing DISCO move like that is so pretyyyy Dude time and time again, Trek could be such a good game series. theres so much to do if they can write a rich enough basis and objective course. I know Star Trek: Resurgence is a thing, but why is it the ONLY thing like it that exists for Trek? These things really make me wonder. And make me worry I really hope Trek doesnt fade out. I recognise another aspect of why I feel confused about Burnham's character is that it hasnt been made apparent to me really her amiable or decent rooting into the crew to care about them due to all of the animosity the show was borne with. L'Rell's eyes look so gooddd Damn she was into torturing u huh Damn you just shot her like that damn poor Tyler. I love how solid the phasers look in hand I love the detail in the sets marvelous job. Ohh thats a very nice fade in to the monitor of the sensour

oml the way DISCO could just spin like that and pull DBZ teleport lmaoooooo Kol saying "wtf is it doing" lmaooo I worry that the sensour on the klingon ship is so bright and glowy would just give away its position to the klingons It's a little odd how the DISCO spins before teleportation haha intersting though Stamets said I love you but had like no gravity ack The way Stamets shakes his head side to side like that nakedly without camera effect or blured movement looked laughable. this kind of stuff just really impedes the show. when its easy to fix. The way Kol picks his teeth with the badge - the way its shot is not the best but ill say Burnham's line delivery saying "I'm the one who killed T'Kuvma" was actually really good and strong. man this show has bits and pieces of being rather fair in performance. but it gets assaulted by really amateur/dumb/distasteful constructive choice in the episodes

damn i didnt think hed put the badge on himself That looks so interesting imagine that OOOO I liked that transport midjump nice ??? really?? Kol is destroyed just like that?? that felt so fast with very little impact? Kol never really felt menacing is the thing. The scariest the klingons felt in this show so far is literally episode one. when Burnham meets this fully armoured klingon during her space flight. It was a literlaly BEAUTIFULLY DELICIOUS moment of that reveal and that bird of prey it was actually WONDERFULLY done. where has that gone. i still dont care at all for ash x burnham. itd be more compelling if they were good friends. without romance.

i feel like nothing really significant happened with Kol gone now like nothing at all. There is a certain curse that Star Trek has. That is loses a lot of steam when it attempts to deviate from TOS. I mean, i understand TOS is the essence of trek forever and always. but it also makes me sad that trek doesnt really stand on its own with much semblance of strength without TOS. It's another reason why Trek feels so small. Cargo Bay is so pretty. Lorca being humble is nice. saying thank you? nice. The filming of this episode is literlaly better. the camera direction is not done in such an annooyingly impatient jittery way as past episodes I like how we just appreciate the cargo bay environment KLINGON BOOBS. i didnt think id see that. oml dont tell me you have a stockholm syndrome thang going on :( wow thats the first time i ever seen a naked klingon. Oh shit. dont say she R'd u. that's fucked. Ok I think another reason why this episode is actually better is because its actually DARING to be more S T E A D Y . which is something htis show CRITICALLY needs desparately. stamets kissy Hugh cuteee Stamets you better not die from this last jump.

Um. Lorca. Those are a lot of coordinates? um. ummmmm. oh shit whoaaaaaaa those are some NICE ice crystal effects on the glass

ummm there were momentarily 2 DISCOs ……. m…. …..m………mmm…….mirrorverse….??? infinite permutations huh MIRRORVERSE?

damn stamets so pale even his eyes lost colour. Kind of funny every time we see the android we hear that electronic sound Oooo

Ok yeah this was one of the stronger episodes in the series so far. almossst exclusively because the camera work/cinematic editing was more PATIENT. whatd i say. ok well an improvement for sure, this episode was.

im waiting on ya, DISCO.

#star trek #star trek discovery #discovery #DISCO #nutrek #thoughts #text #reaction #almalvo

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wuahae · 9 months

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ok writing ask!!

my favorite fic of yours - obviously the APPLE PIE doyoung timestamp u wrote me like at the beginning of our friendship /////j although that one regularly makes me extremely sad and tender and im not ashamed of it. my REAL answer is gravity!! i think it was so masterful how you bounced from past to present and for a fic that has like ... a LOT of introspection and vibes it kept me engaged the whole time. the prose was chefs kiss brilliant. there r still lines i think about and i LOVEE the central metaphor of the gravity that pulled yn/sunwoo tgt. and i felt like it was just so authentic of a conflict. it didnt feel contrived or immature--everything was well thought out and i really could empathize and understand with all of the characters!

8. what i like most ab ur writing - i feel like its really hard to pick one singular thing but i think one thing that stands out the most is how realized yn's inner world is. like its clearly really well conceived and i love how inspired their characters/motivations are!

11. ok my little pipe dream is that u write a fantasy or mystery fic....like i know we've been rolling the idea of a mythology au or something around but i think u would really excel at worldbuilding and the complex imagery needed for a non-real world fic!!! alternatively an e2l fic but i know u arent gnna write that one HAHA

HUUUUUUU YOUUU………… honestly i wld not blame you if apple pie doyoung was a legit choice HAHA like i still deem it one of my favs to this day, not to mention it was the fic that got me in ur dms 😚😚 but also your pick being GRAVITY is sooo. HUU gravity is just so personal to me 😭😭😭 sometimes i go back to read it and im like Hm maybe i was just microwaving w this one but to hear u say this abt it means the world to me ☹️☹️ i also go back to read your review of it MONTHLY im so serious .

and GAH!! im so glad to hear you say that actually because i always Try to make yn seem believable and have the conflicts not only reflect the character themselves but write them in a way that makes them feel tangible :”) i try!!! i really do 🥹🥹

FANTASY OR MYSTERY……,hu…….well you can maybe get a Dose in my dolily fantasy drabble slow cooking in the crockpot but . its actually so funny to hear you say that because originally i started out writing original fiction and All my plotlines were set in fantasy worlds 🧎🏻‍♀️🧎🏻‍♀️ i’ve since become too smoothbrained head hurty to really establish a good fantasy world and magic system within it BUT! maybe one day . maybe one day… and also e2l HELP like HONESTLY i would love to be able to pull off writing an e2l but even halfway through thinking of the plot i’m like. WHY FIGHT! WHY NOT LOVE…… and then the au crumbles to pieces

but moreover TYSM FOR SENDING THIS IN…….ive been mulling over how to respond to this all day even as i was waiting in line at the concert but i don’t think anything i say Here or in our dms can truly convey how grateful and thankful i am that you are my friend 🥹🥹🫶

#iiiiii think . that mythology au we keep rolling around………#i have a juyeon drabble set up and MAYBE it can be a series but idk. idk…….#maybe ill bring a skeleton of a drabble over to u ….One day #q&a — lily ♡

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ankhisms · 11 months

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ok final thoughts having just finished the last ep

it actually feels difficult to put my feelings into words although i certainly have a lot of them about this show and specifically the final episodes. i think if youve followed me for a bit you probably have some kind of sense that while i do enjoy a good amount of his writing i am by no means a huge fan of inoue and i have plenty of criticisms of him. having finished faiz just has made me have more criticisms of him and his writing and honestly if i had watched faiz before donbrothers came out i would have not wanted to watch donbrothers at all if that gives you a sense of things.

tldr if you dont want to read all of this: i stand by the statement of when faiz is good its REALLY REALLY GOOD and when faiz is bad its bad.

the thing with this show is that ive watched shows with poor writing choices and execution before, ive watched shows that had a lot of potential that slam dunked all of it in the trash and ive watched shows thatve made baffling choices near the middle/end of the show that just make no go damn sense, and many of these shows ive just stopped watching because i was so frustrated with their writing choices. despite the times when faiz would drop in quality and things would go from being very interesting and good to being boring and not making sense or just not mattering in the long run at all i never wanted to stop watching it entirely. i was never frustrated with it to the point of wanting to drop it. i will say kusaka just as a character made me get preeetty close to wanting to drop the show because of how mad he made me but i just ended up pacing myself and taking breaks between when id watch an episode. in the end i still was interested in the characters and their motivations and takumi and kiba especially were very interesting to me, not only their relationship with one another but their friendships with their respective trio members and their motivations and struggles as characters.

which is also part of why the end of faiz is so frustrating. i already talked about this while i was in the middle of watching the last two eps but the change in kibas character goes from believably dissillusioned with humanity after his close friend has been tortured and killed to being cruel in a way that does NOT fit his character at all. it really feels like inoue wanted to create a new villain at the very last second but he knew he didnt have time to introduce a new character so he just took kiba and was like ok hes just evil now

it would have been so easy to actually take the parts of the faiz ending that were compelling and interesting and put them together to make something good. you could have kiba be struggling and angry with humanity while still having him stay in character it literally makes no sense for him to want to have takumi tortured at all. the last fight and the stuff with the orphenoch king felt rushed in general and it really does just cut away from that fighr and from kiba fucking dying to a few weeks later and it feels so jarring?? also it felt like kiba just suddenly came back to his senses and was like oh jeez ive been wildly out of character now its time for me to help and then sacrifice myself! like again. there were so many choices here that made no sense and were frustrating

i also still feel really upset whenever i think of everything that happened with yukas character im not even going to type up a lot about it because i know if i think too much about it ill just end up making myself feel bad but i mean it when i say im never forgiving inoue for what he did to yuka it was truly so fucking horrible and unecessary

so yeah. i really love the characters of faiz [KUSAKA DO NOT INTERACT I WAS SO HAPPY WHEN KIBA SNAPPED YOUR NECK] and theres a lot of interesting and compelling ideas that faiz has, i absolutely dont hate faiz or anything like that. i like faiz. i really do like faiz. but part of me liking faiz is seeing just how it couldve been so much better and criticising the parts of it that i think have a worse quality of writing. i love takumi forever

#kr faiz lb

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star-firework · 2 years

Text

if twit is gone, i will have to use a blog like a real blog.

so anyway,

im a warehouse manager now and i got an employee who i feel like im in an abusive relationship with

he out of nowhere said "so some fat, ugly Samoan man won a miss america pagent and he identifies as a woman and you KNOW no one believes that shit!" and that caught my ear and made me stop and ask him why he brought that up cuz there was just no relation to what we were doing

he got defensive and when i asked him to not talk about things like that (cuz we just hired a new guy we dont know his opinions and also its not allowed int he work place!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) the moterhfucker yelled at me and told me that IM "the problem and silencing" his opinions

i asked him to not use combative language and then he said "YOURE using combative language!!!" like a toddler yelling at his mom

i felt like i was on fox news or something, dude listened to so much joe rogan, he just melted in front of my eyes?

i was especially 'triggered' because my recently viral-on-reddit-infamous-homeless-attacking-ex-boss deany boy used to go on long, endless, anti trans rants when i was the only one working with him and i waslike what the fuck!!!!!!!!!! the fuck you care so cuking much about trans people in everything, shut up you old bastard dean

your donuts made my stomach hurt and you keep cream cheese in the fridge so long it turns green and when i went to throw it out, you told me to wipe off the green mold and put it back. you also keep the raw bacon on the top of the fridge of everything definitely not raw. you reuse gravy for days on end to the point i think theres weeks old gravy still being eaten. your wife broke 3 crock pots out of anger for some mundane thing and acted like a high school mean girl when she was in charge and made us remop a floor up to like 4 times because she didnt like how there was a "sheen" on the floor.

anyway

my employee just fucuking blew up at me and then he walked out and didnt return for 3 hours, i was at the point of thinking "well ok, guess he actually just quit?"

He returned and didnt talk to me and left without a word. The next day he called out and only said: "Sick. Out. Indefinitely."

What the hell does indefinitely mean after a blow up?

Poor choice of words or a bad way to vaguely quit?

i told HR and made them call him after he didnt text or show up the next day

i was ready to move on and already got an interview set up to fill in when we are already in crisis mode at work lol

then the bastard texts me at 5 when im about to go home and he is furious that HR was calling him. he said "if you have a problem you say it to my face, im coming in tomorrow sick or not"

i felt threatened and scared because when he gets mad, he gets mad and testosterone fueled rage and i dont know if he would get physical

he also was like "am i supposed to be looking for another job!?"

i was so scared of his reaction i was thankfully able to call hr and have her walk me thru how to text this maniac back

i really dont want to work with him ESPECIALLY now

but somehow the company wont fire anyone so this behavior is still cool and no one has balls, i dont have balls and guess i have to continue workingand managing a manchild who is going to be set off at anything

i also have to somehow figure out how to get a meeting with him, me and HR without it sounding liek an interogation because he is so easily defensive

we were cool and i have even been to his house and met his wife and had beers with him and another manager and then it felt like in one instance it just got all washed away because he wanted to rant about trans people?????????

i am so confused!

i also have thrown up soooooooo much this past year from stress, jfc. im finally losing weight but from a very very bad reason and very very unhealthy way that is painful aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

still dont know whats gonna happen since this dude is planning on coming back tomorrow and i have an interview w someone we meant to replace him after he was MIA

#blogpost #me thinkin cuz no twitter #warehouse life

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ambivalence-and-torpor · 2 years

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Hm.... Lyz I want to share just something I know about them.. just between us. Ok? You've mentioned it before- those forbidden things you talked about.. how they only do that with strangers.. have you maybe thought.. They're trying to be respectful in return? I can't be in their mind.. but I feel like they're trying not to treat you like these strangers? If they really didnt care about how you felt.. dont you think they wouldve just. Taken the chance? I know it'd not happy thoughts ..

But avoiding talking about it.. is .. rather childish?

I know its not a complete solve to your.. feelings.. be it how complicated they are.. and with how they act in return.. but.. if you think it's the best choice. I'll support it. Just.. I feel like you're being a little too considerate? Hahah.. But you've always been so sweet and considerate about these things..

AA: ♡♡♡ Just... between... us? I-I uhm... I-I don’t uhm... ♡♡♡

AA: ♡♡♡ I-I don’t know isn’t this kind of a breach of... y-you know... privacy? N-Not that I don’t uhm... b-believe you, but... I... ah... ♡♡♡

They paused, kneading their fingers a little bit as they listened to what was said.

AA: ♡♡♡ I-I know... I know they care about me... I don’t doubt that... ♡♡♡

AA: ♡♡♡ I uhm... I know you’re trying to uhm... to comfort me, but... I doubt they would have uhm... e-ever called me their uhm... their friend, if... if they didn’t care about me... so uhm... ♡♡♡

Elyzia took a slow, deep breath, attempting to keep themselves as calm as possible. Not exactly an easy task when your heart feelt like it was cracking open in a plethora of uncomfortable and painful ways. Lyz would never dare and try stop their own heart from doing its job, of course. Heartbreak was just part of it, not something to be feared or avoided all together... but that didn’t mean it was pleasant, or easy to deal with.

AA: ♡♡♡ Sometimes I think... I think it would be easier if they didn’t care... If they didn’t consider me to be their friend... if... if there... if there wasn’t... anything between us... ♡♡♡

AA: ♡♡♡ M-Maybe I am... ch-childish, I mean... maybe... maybe the others were right from the get go... maybe I was... never meant to be... to be out here... m-maybe I should have stayed in Elysium... ♡♡♡

AA: ♡♡♡ W-What kind of Cupid am I anyway? One that befriended the enemy... and then fell in love with them... even started to desire them... if they knew what I was doing... it’s almost like I’m proving e-everything they ever said about me right... how I’m too small, too weak... unpure... ♡♡♡

They had a lot more to say, remembering all of the insults that had been thrown at them in the past, but Lyz forced themselves to pause, unwilling to delve deeper into whatever dark thoughts were brewing in their mind. No, they were past this. They shouldn’t repeat those awful things, even if it was all too easy to fall into past habits.

AA: ♡♡♡ S-Sorry... I uhm... I went a little... uhm... o-overboard... i-ignore that, please... ♡♡♡

Elyzia didn’t even seem to notice the tears that had spilled, pretending like nothing had happened.

AA: ♡♡♡ O-Of course I’m considerate of my friends. Th-That’s what uhm... what friends do. And... h-how could I not be uhm... c-considerate of their feelings, when... when they’re being so considerate of... of mine? ♡♡♡

AA: ♡♡♡ Y-You said it yourself... they care about me... that’s why... that’s why they refused me... and... and that’s why... they... they want to treat me well... and they uhm... they do treat me very... kindly... and I appreciate it... and I love them for it... ♡♡♡

AA: ♡♡♡ The... the very least... least I can do is... respect their boundaries... and I’ve... I’ve been breaching them... multiple times... I... I need to stop... the things I’m doing... they... they’re not okay... I’m being selfish... I’m pushing things onto him that he doesn’t want... ♡♡♡

AA: ♡♡♡ I should... I should apologize... I... I will... I will apologize... just... just gotta get myself... sorted... I-I guess... ♡♡♡

#Elyzia #Fantroll #OC #ask #yaebloom #goldenguillotines #long post

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