#i know i'm bad at death scenes
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Excuse me but how is Namor a villain? Someone explain it to me like I'm stupid because I don't get how he's a villain.
An opponent maybe but certainly not a villain. He didn't do anything Wakandans wouldn't have done when they were still in hiding.
Not saying him or the people of Talocan are perfect, but saying he's a villain is a little too much imo. He's just a ruler protecting his people. Just like the Wakandans.
#wakanda forever spoilers#black panther wakanda forever#namor#If I invited someone to my home and her friend came and killed my friend... I would go to War too#I know some people said he kidnapped Shuri but she asked to go there and they were treating her like royalty#I think he had bad motivations but towards the surface world not towards the Wakandans#and the scene at the ONU shows he was right#The lady guard who died could have been anybody ...I'm not surprised he went to war after her death#The villains are the United Nations members stated we saw at the beginning#ONU is UN lol#sorry for the typo
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guess what I finished watching
#genuinely I am bamboozled#I heard it was bad and I knew it was bad but I didnt realize the scene ITSELF was as horrible as that#its just. genuinely how fucking dare you for doing that#I understand the concept okay#the entire season and show has been foreshadowing eve's own death and I Get the concept of twisting that around#in the sense that her death comes from another's undoing and that her death comes from villanelle's protection#but the execution ????? even putting aside that the ending itself is shit and disingenuous for the characters. the EXECUTION OF IT#thats the part that has Genuinely stumped me#even the reveal at the very end with carolyn- at this point that means nothing#there's no leadup to it happening like I thought there would be it just Happens while theyre being happy and it's all over within 30 second#and then the show Ends#what the fuck#knowing it was coming didnt even help it just makes me more angry than sad#in the last two minutes???????????#goddamn#I am so fucking sorry to u all who watched this season as it aired#that is sick#after all the character development????#okay. I promise I'm done now. what the fuck. I went to bed immediately after watching and woke up ANGRY#sorry for the abundance of tags mygod#killing eve#killing eve spoilers#smokey speaks
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So the manga really is going the same as the anime, huh? Well then.
Wake me up when Fyodor is resurrected.
#I'm not usually one to be negative so please forgive me haha#BSD spoilers#Bungou Stray Dogs#did Asagiri really retcon a hand injury for Fyodor that is actually so bad it's funny#I mean I guess it's not a retcon if he always planned for it but still asdfgfghj#I do appreciate the extra funny scene with Nikolai and Fyodor!#and I'm actually looking forward to how Fukuchi's death scene is fleshed out in the next coming chapters#also I know Fyodor didn't die yet but no I am not reliving him getting blown up in a fucking helicopter crash thank you
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give this man a pretty dress immediately
#i would love to say this scene was foreshadowing but he also threw them out a window so i don't know if i want it to be lgfkjdlkfjslkj#but also. like. he literally turned a cake topper into a tiny version of himself so he could yearn dramatically oh my fucking god#he wants to marry that man so bad. i'm gonna fling myself into the sun.#ofmd spoilers#ofmd s2#our flag means death#edward teach#ofmd blackbeard#wee john and frenchie can sew him something nice i'm speaking it into existence
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hand on my stupid heart flashbacks
this is a No One Knows AU & Full Hazmat AU where Danny ended up in the Ghost Zone & didn't go back into the human world initially because he thought he was dead. by the time he realized he is, in fact, at least half alive, he'd already been missing for at least 2 weeks.
will probs never finish homsh sorry. i wrote this a couple years ago in a haze & just haven't been able to finish it because i can't replicate the style, which i find is what i love about this fic the most. it wouldn't be the same without it.
posting the flashback introsーwhich are meant to be read between chapters/the actual plot, starting after chapter 1ーcuz fuck it. excuse typos & shit, i never properly edited it, as i forgot it existed immediately after i wrote it
original description of homsh: Danny Fenton has officially been missing for over a year. Maddie & Jack Fenton refuse to give up on their son. Sick and tired of the police running them in circles, and the case getting colder by the day, the Fentons turn to their last resortーPhantom.
800~ words (full unfinished fic is 20k~)
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When Danny woke up surrounded by thick, green fog, and couldn’t breathe without swallowing heavy air that was more like water than anything, he was sure he was dead. The portal glowed behind him, illuminating the pitch darkness around him in soft, yellow, warm light.
He almost went back.
Almost.
He was dead. His parents were ghost hunters. They had drilled into his head from the moment he was born that he could never, ever panic in death. That he would accept it. That he would not be scared. So he would be prepared to be brave in the face of death and would not become a ghost.
He panicked. He did not accept it. He was terrified. And so he woke up in the Ghost Zone.
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Danny went back through the portal when he saw some ectopuses acting… strange. Like they had an idea in their heads. Like they had a plan.
Which was weird, with animal ghosts. He had only been in the Ghost Zoneーmom and dad called it that, he rememberedーfor a couple weeks. Or, he had already been there for two weeks. Or maybe time worked differently and he was there five minutes, or four years orー
The ectopuses went through the portal and, despite everything, Danny went after them.
While he was busy reeling at being home, the ectopuses immediately attacked dad. Danny was horrified. Jack was overwhelmed. Danny stepped in, in a moment fueled by sheer adrenaline and stupidity, snatching a Fenton Thermos™ off a shelf and releasing his shaky invisibility. The ectopuses didn’t stand a chance. And when they were safely in the Thermos, he slowly turned around to dad, ready for the confrontation. Ready for the “what happened to you?” and the “where have you been?” and the “we’ve missed you”.
Dad scrambled to shoot at him.
Danny fled.
His parents didn’t recognize him.
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The Lunch Lady attacked when Danny was mourning Halloween.
He’d waited all year. He made a costume that summer. He wouldn’t get to go trick or treating with Sam and Tucker this year. Or any year. For the rest of his lifeーor existence. Whatever.
The Lunch Lady appeared in the school and demanded in straight fury, “Who changed the menu?”
Everyone pointed at Sam.
Danny hadn’t known just how powerful ghosts could be. His parents never told him the specifics. Just that they were dangerous.
This ghost grew and her aura hit him like a hurricane, almost physically pushing him back. It was so strong that the students in the Casper High cafeteria seemed to feel it too.
The Lunch Lady was a much harder opponent than the ectopuses. She levitated meat. She used it as a weapon, and seemed to bring it back to life. She created weird meat creatures that grew sharp teeth and claws out of bones. They were mindless, attacking everything that got too close to the ghost. Danny would have run away without hesitation, if Sam hadn’t been in the crossfire.
Danny fought the Lunch Lady. It was a long struggle, but he caught her in the thermos after over an hour. When he turned to Sam and Tuckerーboth of whom he had to save due to Tucker trying to jump into the fightーall three of them bloody and bruised, he cringed. But a part of him hoped. Desperately.
Surely they would know him on sight.
“Wh-what are you?” Sam gasped at him finally.
Danny flinched as if she had struck him. “J-just… your friendly neighbourhood phantom.”
-
Danny didn’t know what possessed him. Oh. Pun not intended.
He just barely caught the Fentons leaving in the GAV, dragging suitcases behind them. He couldn’t help himself. What on Earth were they doing?
They were going to Vlad Master’s mansion for their college reunion.
It was a whole thing. But something was off. Besides all the adults reminiscing about the 80’s.
Danny sensed ghosts immediately but he couldn’t see anything. Unfortunately for him, Vlad could also sense him. It was two days of Danny staying invisible, and Vladーthe halfa? Is that what Danny is?ーtrying to kill Jack. Somehow, Danny managed to fight off Vlad, not turn back, and without the Fentons getting hurt. His secret intact.
VladーPlasmius, also learned about Phantom. And Vlad hated him. The manーghostーwhatever, seemed to only care about one thingーpossession. Of money. Of things. Of people. He was more ghost than Danny had ever seen. Vlad’s obsession was overwhelming.
Danny couldn’t believe someone so much like himself could be so disturbing.
#danny phantom#danny phantom au#danny phantom fanfiction#you know that gif of the wailing emoji dissolving? :Why:?#yeah that's what i do every time i remember i never finished HOMSH while i still had the style in my brain#feel free to steal this idea. please steal this idea. please write it i wanna see this idea so bad but im already writing another 100k+ fic#if y'all want me to post the full fic i can but. it is not finished & most likely never will be. sorry again#i won't lie. the haze i was in was a depressed one. i was. not in a good place At All when i wrote HOMSH#like the only part i remember actually writing was the panic attack scene & that's just barely#i reread the whole fic in the middle of the night months later while listening to Implode Alright by Built by Snow on repeat#yeah i cried. this one is funny but mostly it's just. mourning. grief. the works. it's a vent fic & also a. kind of. wishful fic#like. don't you just wish death wasn't so permanent. don't you wish you could tell them everything you wish you could#don't you wish you could just see them again#i'm actually writing this into a bigger ventier series currently called Let Grief Do Its Work#cuz i rewatched LUCIDS again recently & remembered what HOMSH was originally about. why i was writing it#i'm not calling it HOMSH cuz. HOMSHie is my baby. it's its own thing & i don't wanna ruin the vibes#reluctantly admitting i call an unfinished fanfic i don't remember writing... HOMSHie baby... in my head#yeah i have a cute nickname for my fic. what of it#it's 5am & i think i'll throw up if i think any more about posting unfinished unedited pieces of a fic so i'm going for it. cowabunga#go into the world. get your 2 notes you beautiful animal#*passes out*
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2023 character wrapped: 9 characters you loved in 2023! Was tagged by @frankensteinsmona
From left to right this is Rory Gilmore (Gilmore Girls), Daisy Jones (Daisy Jones & The Six), Aria Montgomery (Pretty Little Liars), Midge Maisel (The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel), Elena Gilbert (The Vampire Diaries), Riley Flynn (Midnight Mass), Erin Greene (Midnight Mass), Annabel Lee Usher (The Fall of the House of Usher), and Ilonka (The Midnight Club).
Daisy, Annabel Lee, and Ilonka are the only three I met this year but I did rewatch all of the others' shows this year so it still counts lmao.
Tagging: @woodswit, @purplesigebert, @randomestfandoms, @imperpetuallylost, and anyone who sees this and wants to participate!
#tag games#thanks for tagging me <3#I'm purposefully ignoring that like half of this is mike flanagan#I think I was very well-behaved#will not do honorable mentions bc I'll just be listing the entire flanaverse since I am almost done with my november rewatch#and all of the liars + mona and ali#and my gilmore guys and gals#and like every tmmm character except joel (fuck that guy)#and a full list of tvd characters except Matt and the salvabros#and ofc#Dean Winchester who is always my immediate next thought anytime I think of Elena Gilbert#but I did not rewatch as much spn as I do in my average year#(addendum readers will know this is a bad thing)#and ofc every single lady in dj&ts plus warren#was really sad I couldn't find Ilonka's last name anywhere#that's my daughter!!!!#and yes i DID have to pick midge making hearts eyes at lenny#and aria about to make the biggest mistake of her life bc she saw ali’s missing poster#and riley’s death scene#and erin’s face when she’s talking about heaven#and daisy telling billy to go#and annabel realizing she has to leave roderick because he deceived her about what kind of person he is#and ilonka using her story to save anya#and elena’s exact perfect ‘the face that launched a thousand ships’ moment#and rory’s life imploding again bc she can’t deal with her feelings properly Again#bc i love all of them exactly as they are#and these are defining moments!!!
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i gotta say, 13 hours into omori, i don't get why people call it a horror game
#omori#like there's been occasional creepy scenes but they're usually quite short especially compared to the broader tone of the game#it does have a serious story. about like. trauma and failing friendships? that i'm really intrigued by as it slowly uncovers#like maybe it leans further into horror elements as the game goes on but i gotta say the elements that do exist aren't enough for me#to explicitly call it 'horror'#don't get me wrong i love this game and i love the spooky moments they're really fun!#i just went thru the train ride bit which was pretty fun i liked how the shadow at the end says the name of ur real-world character#even though ur playing as omori in the dream world#also no spoilers but it's unclear to me as of now if omori is just haunted by the memory of his sister's death#or if her spirit is Actually haunting him#also i had flowers and i thought maybe i cld put them on her grave but it didn't give me the option#also i loved the moment where kel talks about hero's depression and the way he himself was overlooked by h#their parents#man. i love all these characters so much#god the scene where aubrey fights you in the church and the whole time all the churchgoers are whispering about how terrible she is#i felt so bad for her man#also her design in the real world is cool as hell#also i actually lost to aubrey during the church scene but i didn't get a game over she just let me be and left#omori spoilers#i know the game is old-ish but my wording may have implied i wasn't going to spoil and i totally did#what i meant was don't tell me abt the future story of the game i'm only on 'three days left'
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Hab Das Mädchen, das allein nach Haus geht zuende geguckt. Ganz offensichtlich ist der Grund, aus dem Nina in den nächsten Folgen nicht mehr dabei ist, der, dass sie zusammen mit Julie in den Flieger gestiegen ist und die beiden zusammen ein neues Leben angefangen haben. Ganz eindeutig. Eine andere Erklärung gibts nicht.
#yes hello i'm not particularly emotionally affected by this but this is a very nice way to deny the ending#those two were gay as fuck and i just know they're living their best life in spain or something#kaj rambles#some negativity ahead tho so stop reading if you don't wanna see me bitch about this episode#unnecessary long tag in between just so you really do have the opportunity to stop reading if you don't want to see the negativity#actually hated most of this ep for reasons wholly unrelated to nina's death#pretty much everything between her and karow was just annoying#and sorry but the death scene was. so bad.#und ich wiederhole mich aber warum zum fick hat eigentlich im tatort nie jemand ne schutzweste an???#ja ich weiß nina hatte eine und hat sie julie gegeben. die eigentliche frage ist warum hatten sie keine für julie dabei???#ist ja nicht so als wäre yashas schießwut unerwartet gekommen.#anyway#tatort berlin#nina rubin#das mädchen das allein nach haus geht
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Finlay Friday
13x01: "Karma to Burn", script extracts. Pt. 3/3. Unaired scenes under the cut.
#CSI#CSI CBS#Julie Finlay#Finlay Friday#DB Russell#Barbara Russell#Carlos Moreno#Karma to Burn#script extracts#my gifs#1. the good news is the next six episodes are all back to fitting in one post#the bad(?)/glorious(??) news is that CSI on Fire is definitely going to be a four-parter lmao I cannot wait#2. re: unaired scenes - i'm off to live forever in the AU where Russell killed Briscoe#so Winthrop never met his brother and s15 didn't happen#ps give me the Barbara/Finn scene or give me death#(although by omitting it we move from Brass telling DB “Go home. Be with your family.” straight to Finn walking in)#(because she is his family)#3. my brain is trying to spin meta on the theme of Finn/hope#like I never know what to DO with CSI Unplugged and her 800 assertions the kid is dead#and here she's SO scared that the same has happened to Katie#and lately I've been thinking that if you add it together with the 'lost someone she loved' backstory then#hope becomes dangerous; hope gets you hurt#I think I'd like to write something coherent on this but for now tag meta will do!!!
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okay jonsa prayer circle. i have written over 10k for the keep our love alive finale today after not touching the fic for months.
completion is near, writer's block is over, an update is pending and the audience will finally get what it deserves.
#jonsa#mine#i have never felt so bad about not updating before.#it's been seven months and it's the final part of a fic that when read with it's prequel is already 130k#but the end is near i can taste it#i'm at around 20k for this chapter now and that's probably around halfway#which seems like i have a long ways to go#but i have this outlined to DEATH#i know every scene that needs to happen exactly#and i've never been on such a roll with my writing#the real question is if i can get this done before my trip on tuesday#now that would be a miracle
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kind of wish my way of coping with morbid things wasn't to expose myself to them until I become desensitised lol
#saw an iceberg for deaths caught on camera and was like. wow there is a LOT of information to look into and take in and none of it#is going to be nice. maybe i should leave and forget I've ever seen this#but no like obviously now i have no choice but to read in depth about every single death on there#bc i know if i ignore it i'll be thinking about it for longer#this was like with threads bc when i first heard a bit about it i was like. that sounds horrible. and i have a dissertation due in a few#weeks so like. i do Not need this on my mind right now#but that didn't do anything so in the end i had to watch it to get it out of my system#and then i guess it sort of worked bc?? now me and threads are besties#fav comfort film of all time. would recommend to everyone#okay not that. but genuinely i forget how bad i felt when i first read about it and now i think about scenes from it like 😐#is that healthy. probably not. anyway#also at the start of this year i was obsessed with kaylea titford's death and then not long after that shafilea ahmed's as well#that era feels so far away even though it was only like 8 months ago#but like e.g. with the shafilea ahmed thing i'm at the stage now where if it comes into my head i can easily push it away#but i could not do that back in february i literally wouldn't be able to sleep until i'd found out every single bit of information#oh god it's nearly the 20th anniversary of that isn't it#but yeah anyway it's like once you show me something morbid. even just a glimpse of it. that's it there's no going back#i will Not Stop until i know everything there is to know about it. and then it'll be on my mind for weeks until i stop feeling anything#and then i'll forget about it#i remember as kids me and my sister would sometimes see An Image on the unfiltered 2000s internet#like that one pic of the chupacabra that's obviously not real but like as a kid it's terrifying#and my sister's response would've been to close it and never look at it or think about it again#and i remember my parents wouldn't allow me to talk about chupacabras in front of my sister#which waS SO HARD bc my response to it was to hyperfixate#and the image creeped me out so to get rid of it i would look at it like everyday until i didn't feel anything anymore#and then me and the chupacabra image were besties <3 and I'd make jokes about it#idk what the point of this post is I've basically just told the same story three times#and there will soon be a fourth. once i watch this video going through the deaths caught on camera iceberg#which i am not going to do now bc it's 00:35 and if i don't sleep now i never will#ramble
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#everyone saying Dream didn't call on his siblings for help while he was imprisoned because he's too proud and petty#or because some magic laws prohibited it#I don't disregard the pride thing but I think there's so many more layers to the situation (which is what makes it so compelling ugh)#listen I don't think Dream trusts his siblings and we even get shown that he's right not to do so and why#it's established he's vulnerable and basically powerless in his fishbowl#and whatever laws the Endless operate under#I doubt he wants to owe any of them a favor. sounds like a shortcut to a bad time#Death might be the exception but we know and Dream knows it's her Roderick wanted to capture#and given that he's already succeeded at capturing one of them I don't think he wants to risk that#Roderick might be an idiot but he is stupidly capable#and we see what happens without Dream in the waking world#a world without Death is probably a LOT worse#there's more layers to this scene but for now I'm done. one point at a time.
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I can't listen to the person of interest soundtrack or any songs that are on it normally. However, I do think many of the songs they use on that soundtrack are impossible to listen to normally regardless of pairing with emotion inducing scenes. Like. Find my a guy who's listened to Johnny Cash's cover of Hurt or The Violent Bear It Away by Moby and HASN'T had to go lie down in the dirt for 6 hours, or heard Sinnerman by Nina Simone and felt an overwhelming surge of energy trying to claw its way out of their ribcage
#then again! i hear Future Starts Slow by The Kills and suddenly i'm overcome with a wave of Something that's just Shaw Shaped#anticipation and adoration and .. idk i'm bad at emotions man#but that's probably definitely not something i would experience without pairing this song with its scene in relevance#person of interest#soup speaks#it's the same sort of thing as like. for example death with dignity by sufjan stevens#for an example of one that hasn't been on POI#i listen to it and i feel everything all at once and i can't decide if i need to rip myself open or bury myself in the garden#you know?
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not to be a horrible shipper all over your plotfic but what would the ships look like in your ageswap au?
The sample I posted does rather invite the question!
I should put out there, as a general rule, I'm not all that interested in Mike/Will and I don't have plans to write it anywhere. I don't really vibe with it, generally, and I believe I've mentioned previously (but maybe only in tags) that I really hate the way the Duffers conceived of and have been handling the possibility that Will might be gay. And many of the ways parts of the fandom have acted in response. I get that it's important to some people, and I don't want to rain on anybody's parade, but I've seen so much bad behaviour from the showrunners all the way down that it's pretty firmly put me off.
With that said, though. This fic was undertaken before I'd had much exposure to the fandom, and also, the roleswap plays...well, a role. I'm a sucker for a good triad relationship, especially the Monster Hunting Trio, and in this version of things, that's Mike and El and Will. So this is probably the only time you're ever going to see me writing reciprocated romantic feelings between Mike and Will. It's just that El is also there. And the entire context of their previous relationships with each other has changed. It feels different. I don't know. I'm operating on vibes, here.
Also because of the roleswap, this is one of those rare places where I'm not mashing Steve and Nancy and Jonathan's faces all together. Nancy and Jonathan are the Hopper and Joyce of this fic, and Steve is the Karen Wheeler. He'll be fine in his loveless marriage while the other two are off having fantastic post-saving-the-world sex. Maybe he'll have an ill-advised affair in the future. Who can say.
(Also Nancy and Barb had a brief on-again-off-again fling post-Nancy's-divorce, which has been over for some time as of the action taking place. Long enough for Barb to find a more stable relationship with the other local lesbian...)
I'm pretty sure that's it, as far as romance goes. Apart from the teen squad, it's pretty secondary to the plot in season 1, and I'm sticking with that. (Also, I need lots of time and space to fully mine the hilarity of Steve being Mike's literal actual father.)
#chatter#ships. plots. triggers. character deaths. whether there will be a banana appearing in a scene. it's all fair game#so long as everybody's respectful about it i love talking about fic whatever shape that takes#and i absolutely don't mind giving warnings or heads up if there's something you're particularly concerned about appearing#(or not appearing)#also it's genuinely nauseating how people want to give the duffers backpats for taking the stephen king route#and using their fiction as an excuse to use every slur they know#'oh the one who's been the target of vicious violent homophobia the whole time is the Only Gay One' try the fuck again boys.#(i have not forgiven them for what they did to robin as soon as she was Canonically Into Girls)#sorry I have. a lot of feelings on this topic.#i'm also most interested in reading will as aro-ace and the duffers' bullshit has only made me double down on that#but i don't want to talk about it like i'm only doing that reading out of spite because i do genuinely think it's interesting in itself#so if i'm going to talk about that i'll do it in a separate post#bc I also don't want to imply that it's an either-or and you can Only have One True Sexuality Headcanon for a character#(they're fictional your honour. this stuff depends on the reader and can also differ in context.)#(like how in the context of this one AU i'm interested in a triad relationship i won't be writing in any other contexts)#also I absolutely don't want to fight anybody for the dubious honour of getting shittily canonized by the duffers' bad takes lmao#'is it/will it ever be canon' is the least interesting metric by which to measure a ship/headcanon/etc to me
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I'm literally twisted, insane even. Thinking about Luis in re4make it's hitting me that I'm gonna get an HD version of my boy ohhh my god my neurodivergence is consuming me
#im sick in the head I'm thinking TOO hard about him#The things I would do for that boy I would kill so bad for him PLEASE PLEASE#god don't even talk to me about HD Luis death scene he's not gonna die I know it my boy wouldn't do that#re4#mine#luis sera
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Learning that fans hated Applejack and called her "boring" is crazyyy to me because I genuinely, unironically believe AJ's the most complex character in the main six.
Backstory-wise, she was born into a family of famers/blue collar workers who helped found the town she lives in. She grew up a habitual liar until she had the bad habit traumatized outta her. She lost both her parents and was orphaned at a young age, having to step up as her baby sister's mother figure. She's the only person in the main gang who's experienced this level of loss and grief (A Royal Problem reveals that AJ dreams about memories of being held by her parents as a baby). She moved to Manhattan to live with her wealthy family members, only to realize she'll never fit in or be accepted, even amongst her own family. The earlier seasons imply she and her family had money problems too (In The Ticket Master, AJ wants to go to the gala to earn money to buy new farm equipment and afford hip surgery for her grandma).
Personality-wise, she's a total people-pleaser/steamroller (with an occasional savior complex) who places her self worth on her independence and usefulness for other people, causing her to become a complete workaholic. In Applebuck Season, AJ stops taking care of herself because of her obsessive responsibilities for others and becomes completely dysfunctional. In Apple Family Reunion, AJ has a tearful breakdown because in she thinks she dishonored her family and tarnished her reputation as a potential leader –– an expectation and anxiety that's directly tied to her deceased parents, as shown in the episode's ending scene. In The Last Roundup, AJ abandons her family and friends out of shame because believes she failed them by not earning 1st place in a rodeo competition. She completely spirals emotionally when she isn't able to fulfill her duties toward others. Her need to be the best manifests in intense pride and competitiveness when others challenge her. And when her pride's broken, she cowers and physically hides herself.
Moreover, it's strongly implied that AJ has a deep-seated anger. The comics explore her ranting outbursts more. EQG also obviously has AJ yelling at and insulting Rarity in a jealous fit just to hurt her feelings (with a line that I could write a whole dissection on). And I'm certain I read in a post somewhere that in a Gameloft event, AJ's negative traits are listed as anger.
Subtextually, a lot of these flaws and anxieties can be (retroactively) linked to her parents' death, forcing her to grow up too quickly to become the adult/caregiver of the family (especially after her big brother becomes semiverbal). Notice how throughout the series, she's constantly acting as the "mom friend" of the group (despite everything, she manages to be the most emotionally mature of the bunch). Notice how AJ'll switch to a quieter, calmer tone when her friends are panicking and use soothing prompts and questions to talk them through their emotions/problems; something she'd definitely pick up while raising a child. Same with her stoicism and reluctance at crying or releasing emotions (something Pinkie explicitly points out). She also had a childhood relationship with Rara (which, if you were to give a queer reading, could easy be interpreted as her first 'aha' crush), who eventually left her life. (Interestingly enough, AJ also has an angry outburst with Rara for the same exact reasons as with EQG Rarity; jealous, upset that someone else is using and changing her). It's not hard to imagine an AJ with separation anxiety stemming from her mother and childhood friend/crush leaving. I'm also not above reading into AJ's relationship with her little sister (Y'all ever think about how AB never got to know her parents, even though she shares her father's colors and her mother's curly hair?).
AJ's stubbornness is a symptom of growing up too quickly as well. Who else to play with your baby sister when your brother goes nonverbal (not to discount Big Mac's role in raising AB)? Who else to wake up in the middle of the night to care for your crying baby sister when your grandma needs her rest? When you need to be 100% all the time for your family, you tend to become hard-stuck with a sense of moral superiority. You know what's best because you have to be your best because if you're aren't your best, then everything'll inevitably fall apart and it'll be your fault. And if you don't know what's best –– if you've been wrong the whole time –– that means you haven't been your best, which means you've failed the people who rely on you, which means you can't fulfill your role in the family/society, which makes you worthless . We've seen time and time again how this compulsive need to be right for the sake of others becomes self-destructive (Apple Family Reunion, Sound of Silence, all competitions against RD). We've seen in The Last Roundup how, when no longer at her best, AJ would rather remove herself from her community than confront them because she no longer feels of use to them.
But I guess it is kinda weird that AJ has "masculine" traits and isn't interested in men at all. It's totally justified that an aggressively straight, misogynistic male fandom would characterize her as a "boring background character." /s
At the time of writing this, it's 4:46AM.
#mlp#yeah i wrote this last night during insomnia.#yeah i know an embarrassing amount of crap about this kids show#but whatever it's my hyperfixation i'll store as much useless information as i want!!!#i'm gay and neurodivergent i have an excuse#in case you needed more proof that aj's my favorite character#personal#delete later#unless you like this analysis stuff#i get why they didn't reveal aj's parent's death until way later and why they didn't do much with it but i wish they did#cuz narratively there could've been so much material with aj's grief. like. i feel like we gloss over the fact that she lost her#mother and father as a teenager#i tried keeping my personal hcs out of this to keep it unbiased#but i'll put some in the tags#involving rarijack –– i think aj can be (but not always) very self-conscious about her relationship with rarity#anxieties that she's not the right fit or that rarity will move away and leave her some day or that another woman will take her attention#(like in rollercoaster of friendship?? nudge nudge??). basic seperation anxiety stuff#long post#regarding applebloom whenever i think about her and her parents i think about that scene in steven universe where steven looks up at#a portrait of his mother and openly wonders what kind of sack lunches she would've made for him. that episode still fucks me up
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